#dancercise

[easeupkid]

i know exercise will make me feel better however consider that if any member of my family walks in on me working out i will die of humiliation

[foone]

it has been ZERO days since I've captured a VHS tape of a trio of pregnant women dancercising in a vaporwave skyplane

[ice-creamforbreakfast]

Khalid discovered a new love for dancercise.

[atomicwrongs]

Failure to attend Mandatory Dancercise will result in severe consequences. You have been warned.

(ID: Drawings of Lady Luck, the Jester, and Audrey from Dicey Dungeons, in brightly-coloured workout gear. Lady Luck has her hair in a ponytail and is wearing an orange crop top that reads ‘what the fuck is sous vide’, and dark blue shorts. The Jester is wearing a black leotard under a cropped blue blouse and pink shorts. Audrey is wearing a purple crop top over a black one-piece, blue tights and purple leopard-spotted legwarmers. End ID.)

[salnanaa]

hcs for alex and emily (ft. my farmer oc, lou)

because lou watches the fortune channel everyday, alex decided to base his workouts on the luck “whats the luck today?” “hmm welwick said the spirits are annoyed” “ah, leg day…”

emily and alex became really good friends once lou gotten close to them. alex never considered her a friendship partner before because he was so stuck trying to live up to a manly “normal” example his father ingrained in him and haley always told him emily was weird. once they got over this they oddly clicked. they decided to start doing weekly yoga and dancercise. this went on without lou knowing for a year until the two surprise him with a choreographed dance.

emilys hair is dyed (she’s naturally blonde). alex didn’t find out until she skipped a week or two and her roots shown.

lou loves dusty but calls him rusty (cause hes an old dog). him and emily decide to give dusty a healthier all natural diet to help with aging. alex is very grateful.

emily and lou help alex with self expression (experimenting with presentation thats not just for others) and alex decides to get a tattoo based on his mom and grandparents. he shows his grandparents and george gets sentimental tears.

bonus: george didn’t understand trans or gay people so alex and lou had to explain it to him. eventually he got the hang of it and now is super supportive but in the funny old person way. evelyn thinks this is the happiest shes seen him in a long time.

[lasudio]

StrangeSpot, Round Fourteen: Vu

This odd couple have raised a pretty cool kid. Hopefully Finn realises he’s a pretty cool kid sooner rather than later.

Crystal dives into her love of fitness and becomes a dancercise instructor. It’s not a typical Vu vocation but she’s never wanted to be typical. That would be NPC behaviour!

[krysmcscience]

Full view here!

What happens when a human has to travel around on a ship full of Impostors? Probably shenanigans. And drama. And hot sexy times.

Anyway, this is the main 'crew' in Breach, a story I've been slowly plodding away at for a few months now. The human on board isn't actually properly introduced to the entirety of the crew until halfway through the story, and a majority of said crew is mostly only talked about before that point, but I wanted to pin their designs down, so...here they are, I guess!

Character and story details under the cut, if you're interested~

The actual main and secondary characters are in the middle, so even though the narrative doesn't actually refer to anyone other than Red by color (since the story is only tangentially Among Us-related), I'll be listing them that way first. Aside from the main human, all names are assumed identities, as Impostors don't actually have names, or even words for anything due to the way they communicate with each other (even the term 'Impostor' is an in-universe Among Us joke gone horridly wrong). Their pronouns are also mostly suggestion, rather than any legitimate preference, as they have almost zero concept of gender.

Mains:

Blue, Qīng Summers (he/him) - Chinese-American goofball who ran away from his family to avoid being pushed into their marketing business, Qīng was on his way to a colony college on Titan when the research vessel he hitched a ride on was attacked. Having unwittingly gotten the attention of the alien infiltrator on board by admitting he thought Impostors were "kinda hot", rather than being killed, Qīng was instead dragged onto the infiltrator's ship in secret for some "fun", only to kick his captor in the dick(?) and make a break for it. Though he evaded most of the crew's notice during the ensuing chase, he was soon caught by the lead security officer, brought somewhere safe after some awkward dealings with the ship's captain, and quickly assured he would be returned to human society. As said security officer is incredibly kind, considerate, and attractive as fuck, Qīng is as of yet unsure if he wants to return at all. He is optimistic, a hopeless romantic, and wears his emotions on his sleeve; he often comes across as silly, and doesn't handle problems well. He enjoys parkour and dancercise, collects sci-fi B-movies, and has a deep fascination for all things alien - Impostors in particular, because he's a fukken xenophile.

Red, Jasper "Red" O'Floinn (he/him) - Lead security officer on the ship, Red was initially slated to become an infiltrator, with his scores outstripping the vast majority of his peers. However, he was caught in the middle of a secret drunken affair with a human, something seen as incredibly shameful for his species, and was rendered ineligible for field work just before assignment. He was only able to get his current position (years later) with help from his childhood friend, and while he still goes out in secret to illicit xenophilia clubs, he fully expected to never get involved with humans beyond the occasional one-night stand. Finding Qīng on board, and having to protect him both from the infiltrator who abducted him and the malevolent captain who would happily torture him to death, changes that very quickly. Red is as of yet unsure if this is a good thing, as while he would love to be in a proper relationship with a human, it would put him in a terribly compromising position, given that his species is currently at war over humanity's encroachment into their territory. Red is very practical and calm, and keeps his opinions and emotions mostly to himself; he is well-known for his ability to settle conflicts between others, and strives for fairness and compassion above all else. He enjoys farming and landscaping, often drawing out plans for his home territory in great detail, and finds Earth history to be fascinating.

Secondaries:

White, Daniel "Ghost" Fulton (he/him) - Front line infiltrator of the ship, and the reason Qīng is on board, Ghost is (usually) the best of the best at what he does: blending in with human research and military crews, and then quickly slaughtering them all before they can reach Impostor territory. Unfortunately, he is very much ruled by his passions, and has some xenophilic leanings he's been repressing all his life, so not only do his kills tend to be vicious, but hearing Qīng express an attraction for Impostors gave him some very stupid and awful ideas, which were not helped by the fact that Ghost is less than great at taking 'no' for an answer. Case in point: Ghost would be willing to sleep with just about any human, but especially Qīng, and has slept with nearly every single member of his crew, outside of Red (who has zero interest in other Impostors), the captain (who wants something deeper than mere casual flings), and Red's childhood friend (who has actual standards, thank you very much). Ghost is generally laid-back, and incredibly confident; he is widely seen as a flirt and a jokester, and has unshakable loyalty towards those he cares for. He enjoys fashion, often designing his own clothes, and is equal parts enamored with and derisive of the paranormal; his own nickname is a tongue in cheek reference to that conflicted interest.

Yellow, Marisol Quinto (she/her) - Communications expert and Red's childhood friend, Marisol is the only reason Red managed to get a job on an infiltrator ship at all, and has spent much of her life building her skills, career, and social network. Initially, she wanted to use her keen understanding of human language, cyphers, and coding from within her home territory, with the expectation that by the time she and Red were assigned together, they would already be in the process of starting a family like they promised each other years prior. Unfortunately, Red being caught with a human sort of dashed that expectation, and with a hormonal disorder that leaves her less than appealing to other Impostors - and thus unlikely to have a family - Marisol decided to instead accept a ship-bound position. Concern and care for Red brought her to eventually assist him in getting more respectable work, and though she is still bitter about being blindsided by his xenophilia, she won't out his ongoing indiscretions to their crew. She hopes he'll change his mind about her, and can't help being suspicious of whatever is going on between her best friend and the weird human that Ghost smuggled on board, but she tries her best to stay positive and focus on doing what she loves. Marisol is social to the extreme, and a mother hen to everyone on the ship; she is the go-to person to spill woes to, though she guards her own secrets jealously, and tends to shut down when she feels lonely. She enjoys cute things, especially clothing, and loves gardening, with sunflowers being her obvious favorite.

Purple, Shio Musashi (they/them) - The First Infiltrator, and now prime captain of the infiltration fleet, thanks in part to a great tragedy that befell their clan, Shio has cultivated a great hatred towards humanity throughout the course of their life. This hatred has swelled to the point of them refusing any field assignment that would require consistent interaction with humans, and intentionally forgetting just about everything they were forced to learn about Earth and its people. Shio enjoys watching humans suffer, and upon being informed of Qīng - the first breach on a ship under their command (supposedly), and a breach that only Ghost, Red, and Marisol were aware of so far - they chose not to eject him, refusing to allow Qīng such a quick death. Mistakenly believing that Red hates humans as well, especially since his secret attraction had long since ruined any chance of him becoming an infiltrator, Shio offered him a deal: that in exchange for Red's silence on the breach, leaving the crew none the wiser, Red would be allowed to keep Qīng in private for "stress relief". Shio is as yet unaware that Red only accepted the deal to protect Qīng (with the added intent of getting him home safely), and thus they later allow Qīng among the crew proper in order to better witness his "suffering". Shio is, in a word, intense - to other Impostors, they are stern but fair, and viciously protective of those they're close with. To humans, they are callous and ruthless, going out of their way to ensure pain and suffering. Shio's career takes up the majority of their time, with their family-oriented priorities taking up the rest, but they enjoy making games of things, and thus have a penchant for making (perhaps ill-advised) deals for fun and occasionally profit. They especially like games and deals that lead to human misery, which plays a very large part in their affection for Ghost, who openly goes along with their whims.

Tertiaries (left side):

Orange, Cam Ngo (she/her) - Inventory manager and general spitfire, Cam knows barely anything about humans other than that she Does Not Like Them - humans have hurt a lot of people she cares about. Mostly no-nonsense, which puts her somewhat at odds with the more playful crew members on board (chiefly Ghost), and a bit of a bully to whoever she doesn't like (chiefly humans), though she has a secret heart of gold that only those who earn her approval get to see.

Green, Verdell Dubois (they/them) - Persistence infiltrator and the second most social butterfly on the entire ship next to Marisol, Verdell is all about learning everything they can about everyone around them. They don't necessarily care if what they learn is accurate, either, because they also thrive on drama; something they often drive Cam up the wall with. While they're not as efficient of an infiltrator as Ghost, Verdell is better at actually gaining the trust of their targets long-term, as they are quite adept at reading a room. They are also not vicious about their kills, as they have no personal beef with humans - although the one they love was badly wronged by rogue human soldiers, Verdell isn't the type to blame an entire group for the actions of a few rotten individuals.

Black, Daruk Varma (he/him) - Security officer, and Number One Human-Hater on board, Daruk takes his job very seriously, which means any human in his sights has to die posthaste. His entire clan and territory was destroyed by rogue human soldiers shortly before his career assignment, leading Shio to snatch him up for their crew in solidarity, and the two have been fast friends ever since. Qīng's presence on board the ship is a source of great fury for Daruk, as various things keep preventing him from killing the "threat" - said things range from Qīng's incredible running ability, to Ghost playing one of his stupid pranks right in the middle of the damn hallway, to Daruk's very own superior officer, Red, who is absolutely fucking Qīng on the down-low, Daruk has zero doubts about it. Putting that aside, he and Verdell bicker constantly thanks to an ongoing rivalry, the source of which Daruk cannot determine for the life of him, as he actually quite likes Verdell and would much rather kiss them instead.

(Verdell and Daruk get marginally longer bits than the other tertiaries, as they have more impact on certain story beats than the others.)

Tertiaries (right side):

Brown, Alondra Novar (she/her) - Chief engineer, Alondra is shy and reclusive, but cheery and sweet once someone gets her talking. Outside of her two usual tagalongs, of which she is the unspoken leader, Ghost is the most adept at getting her out of her shell, as she finds his confidence bolstering for her. She is very outspoken about the family she wants to have, though she is an oddity in that she explicitly wants a willing human host for her young. This is odd because carrying Impostor young to term is, without exception, fatal to the host, and absolutely no human would want to do it outside of being completely suicidal.

Navy, Derya Lagunov (she/her) - Backup infiltrator and very much the strong, silent type, Derya is not so much shy as she is a supportive listener. She finds talking to be a hassle, and doesn't like the feel of it, anyway, so much of her communication is either through contact (the means Impostors use to 'speak' to each other), or a mix of sign language and written word (when she has to deal with humans). Though she is not shy, and likes social interaction just fine, Derya takes a very long time to open up to others, as she is an intensely private individual.

Teal, Tawoos Hafeez (they/them) - Security officer and self-appointed wingman/bodyguard, Tawoos revels in the safety and happiness of others. This has earned them a very close friendship (sometimes with benefits) between Alondra and Derya, and a consistent stream of invitations to literally anywhere Ghost or Verdell can scheme up at a moment's notice. As their general temperament is similar, Tawoos gets along well with Red, and has great respect for his ability to resolve conflict.

(Yeah, I know Navy isn't a canon color, and Teal isn't either and could just as easily be Cyan, but whatever, don't at me, bro.)

Extra fun tidbits before I go sleep:

Humans are accidentally but also kind of on purpose colonizers again (whoops)

Technology is powered by god magic so I don't have to explain too much sciencey shit

"God" is a very tired college student who rapidly ascended over the course of one semester and "fixed" a bunch of shitty Earth things three centuries before the story starts, but also they're still technically...around? Everywhere??? It's a whole thing and yet also barely mentioned at all XD

There are other aliens but they only get brought up just long enough to make it clear that Impostors are chill with every other species except Humans, Specifically

Earth is called Terra now, and pretty much everyone hates it, but all the people in charge thought the change would be "unifying" so now it's Official

Turns out the only thing unifying about Terra is the vast majority of humans thinking it's stupid and getting offended when anyone calls them "Terrans"

When infiltrations first started and weren't yet deadly (or even dangerous), humans made a bunch of dumb jokes and pop culture references about it, which of course included Among Us

The jokes stopped being funny when whole crews started mysteriously dying out and the only message humanity got from the culprits more or less boiled down to 'fuck it, we guess we're Impostors, then :)'

Human civilians are almost never harmed, and even Impostors who don't like humans will try to help them get back to their own kind; human researchers and soldiers, however, are a whole other ballpark (i.e. totes fair game for Murder Time)

Humans still have not made any meaningful contact with the Impostors - only the xenophiles have managed it, and they ain't talkin', cuz if they talk they lose out on all that sweet, sweet alien D and tentacles

Xenophilia fetish clubs are called host clubs, because anyone not in the know - Impostor OR human - would get two wildly separate ideas about what a "host club" should be and thus think nothing of it

Red was never actually referred to as "Red" until Qīng came along, and Qīng initially called him that for lack of anything else to call the Big Security Dude With Red Bandana + Tentacles; it pretty quickly sticks because Red doesn't care and Qīng thinks it's cute

There are other Impostors on Shio's crew, of course, since ten people does not a crew make, but these ten are the only ones important to the plot, lol

The crew normally wear safety suits, all in white, like typical human crews; there are some customization choices made for the sake of aesthetics, of course (Red has a red bandana, Marisol has a sunflower brooch, Ghost has Slimer stickers in inappropriate places, and so on...)

Impostors are a tribal society from deep inside Charon but because of magic they are also technically spacefaring; they are everywhere in the Oort Cloud

Aaaand an Impostor's form is determined at birth by their host and some hosts are Basically Dragons :)

Sleep time now

[beccasissy69]

My March training ended up been a little truncated and I'll mention it here so I don't end my monthly write up on it. The place where I work has been undergoing a little restructuring and although it hasn't directly impacted me, it was pretty stressful. My efforts had been flagging a little and when I was chatting with Goddess she just had me take the week off, which was pretty much what I needed.

My first session was watching an amateur pron star who is just absolutely gagging for it. I know it's porn but she completely sold been desperately addicted to whatever was in front of her and she can't believe how deep she is in it all. I saved some of her videos because it was so inspirational!

She's the kind of gal who pulls her mouth off a c*ck because she needs to breath but can't help herself dive straight back onto it. I swooned a little watching it 🥰.

Then I wrote the first part of my story (link here). Goddess gave me the outline and a few tips and let me get on with it. I wanted it to be realish and I was pretty happy with how it turned out.

Next I had some super intense lesbian videos, which almost had me in tears when I started watching. It was so beautiful and girly and intimate and that really struck a nerve. They were pretty hot as well but they weren't afraid to have sillier moments in them which helps to set them apart from most similar scenes.

Then another session I wrote up! Goddess had me write on 3 drag artists. This was followed by a dancercise session where i made sure to pick something marked "beginner" because I usually pick something that starts ok and then 10 minutes in I'm completely lost!

Then I was back in a chatroom, just chatting with guys but 😲 of the conversations turned distinctly sexual. I did feel like i was getting more into the swing of it by talking about myself and what I'd been doing a little beyond the very basics and asking them for more details when they would give polite non answers. I ended up describing myself as "petite" and you'd be shocked at how many guys were over 6ft!

Then I had a self care spa night where I steamed my face, face mask with some nice music. I also ordered a steamer off Amazon which I've been using a few times and week and my skin seems to be better for it.

Then I had a super long JAV session. 3 women were marrying 3 younger guys (I think it was step mothers and step sons) and there were a variety of wedding scenes with a lot of sex and it was about 2.5 hours long! As I watched I was going crazy on a dildo and I had to take a break a few time because I was getting close to losing it.

It also hit me emotionally, the wedding trappings really helped but there were also scenes of the women chatting and swapping tips for pleasing their men (I don't understand Japanese but the gestures made it pretty obvious what they were talking about).

I didn't have time to watch it all but I also didn't really want to skip much of it so I managed about 90 minutes and then watched the rest on my next day off (spoilers there was a lot of sex and a lot of 💦💦💦).

[byneddiedingo]

Alison Steadman and Timothy Spall in Life Is Sweet (Mike Leigh, 1990)

Cast: Alison Steadman, Jim Broadbent, Claire Skinner, Jane Horrocks, Stephen Rea, Timothy Spall, David Thewlis, Moya Brady. Screenplay: Mike Leigh. Cinematography: Dick Pope. Production design: Alison Chitty. Music: Rachel Portman.

In Life Is Sweet Mike Leigh switches his focus from the angry working class and soulless yuppies of High Hopes (1988) to the muddling-through lower middle class, coping with a world they never made but doggedly trying to make the best of it. Andy (Jim Broadbent) hates his work as a chef in an institutional kitchen, but he keeps on at it. Wendy (Alison Steadman), his wife, holds a couple of part-time jobs, one as a children's dancercise teacher, the other as a salesclerk in a children's clothing store. Her cheerful laugh hides disappointment and pain, some of it generated by their twin daughters. Natalie (Claire Skinner) has short hair and works as a plumber, and we sense that there has been some concern from the parents about her lifestyle, though everyone maintains a façade of contentment. Nicola (Jane Horrocks) has unkempt long hair and does nothing but lie about the house, snarling and smoking and mouthing left-wing slogans, and having slightly kinky sex with her boyfriend (David Thewlis). Nicola is also bulimic, a disorder she hides from her parents, though her twin hears the vomiting through the thin row-house wall that separates their bedrooms, and Nicola has been hospitalized before. But the film is decidedly comic, partly because Andy and Wendy have friends who aren't always as helpful as they could be. Patsy (Stephen Rea) persuades Andy to buy a rundown trailer that has been converted into a hamburger stand, with the idea that Andy can make enough money on weekends to eventually quit his job. Aubrey (Timothy Spall) is trying to open a French restaurant with an Edith Piaf theme, the Regret Rien, and when his waitress decamps just before the opening he persuades Wendy to take her place. Disasters ensue, leaving the characters teetering on the line between hilarity and tragedy, as life in Leigh's film so often does. The "sweetness" in the film lies in the fact that Andy and Wendy are genuinely nice people who suffer fools gladly, even if the fools are their own daughters and friends (or each other). Leigh is never content to stick to formula, however, no matter how much the conventional logic of film comedy seems to demand it, so every moment of Life Is Sweet is likely to hold a surprise: The characters do and say things we wouldn't necessarily expect of them. The performances are uniformly brilliant, as we might expect of this particular roster of British actors, and Rachel Portman's lovely, almost subliminal score backs them up well.

[finny-simmies]

Bob has been working out a lot more, and really enjoys his dancercise.

[thesquireinvictus]

I’ve started dancercising with dumbbells, and what an improvement.

[horsemusicherald]

EveryDayDashie - Pipp Petals | Pop

she’s smol Dashie continues their relentless train of music releases with this poptastic danceable song about the littlest G5 pony princess! As one commenter noted, it definitely has a kinda dancercise feel about it; just imagine Pipp leading you in a group session as you shake your tail along to this beat.

[humanconnection88]

Dance + Exercise = Dancercise 👯👯‍♀️👯‍♂️

#shorts #humanconnection #dance #exercise #danceexercise #dancefact #dancefitness #flexibility #coordination #formofexercise #dancersofticktok #dancersofinstagram #dancercise

[deadfromtheneckdown]

Goodness, I love reading aus, but some of them are kind of unbelievable. Reading a steddie right now where Steve is a yoga instructor, but as far as I’m aware, being the actual same age as that character, yoga was pretty much seen as a hippie only thing back then. And I’m from a European city, so fuck knows what they thought of it in bumfuck Indiana. Aerobics and dancercise was the big thing then, and most midwestern towns and cities only had women’s classes.