#dark age defense review

[productsreview-guide]

Dark Age Defense

Dark Age Defense is a digital survival guide that teaches people to thrive in unfavorable conditions such as power outages, extreme weather conditions, etc. The world is becoming more unpredictable by the second. There are wars breaking out, a global pandemic, climate change, and more! You need all the help that you can in order to continue functioning.

Hurricanes, flooding, earthquakes, and so on are just some of the strange things that happen every month. Events like tornados, earthquakes, and power grid failure can be devastating for those who live in the country, but a natural disaster can pose severe problems even if you’re a tourist. Even though extreme weather conditions can occur anywhere in the world at any moment, are you well-prepared to deal with one?

Nobody expects to be caught in a potentially dangerous and dire situation like a natural disaster. Having a well-designed survival plan and knowing what to do in a catastrophic event can do wonders for you and your loved ones. This is where the Dark Age Defense program comes into play.

Dark Age Defense by Paul Grabowski is an extensive tutorial to help you build your own DIY Infinity Coil generator to help keep your lights on in an emergency. It gives you the tools you need to deal with any power-related disaster. According to the official website, thanks to the guide’s tips and tricks, you’ll be able to gain self-confidence and feel more at ease in any global catastrophe that includes outages and blackouts.

Interested in seeing how Paul handles power failure situations?

To better understand The Dark Age Defense survival guide, check out the review below:

What is the Dark Age Defense?

The Dark Age Defense is a comprehensive guide to surviving and prospering in the face of an impending power catastrophe. Suppose you’re interested in building your own “Infinity Coil” generator. In that case, Paul claims that he has devised an easy-to-follow system that teaches you how to build one using readily available tools and with limited expenditure. In the event of a “Blackout Day,” this generator will allow you and your family to both survive and thrive. Based on Nikola Tesla’s methodology, “the Tesla Coil,” this orb-like structure can extract energy from thin air by utilizing the earth’s magnetic fields.

When the “Blackout Day” comes, Dark Age Defense tells you what you and your family need to do to be ready. The program has detailed instructions on how to make Infinity Coils, which connect to the light rays to allow them to draw in power. All additional guides are available individually or as part of a digital guide package. With Dark Age Defense, you will avoid all of the consequences associated with the total collapse of the electrical grid.

What does Dark Age Defense offer?

The Dark Age Defense is a new digital survival book that aims to arm readers with the knowledge necessary to overcome any power catastrophe. According to Paul, this survival guide will provide you and your family with a complete “compass” so that you can navigate even the darkest of days. This comprehensive survival guide ensures that you’ll be ten steps ahead of any potential dangers no matter what happens.

Here is what you will find inside the program:

The legal “Felony” system increases the efficiency of the infinity coil by 261% more than any other power source.

How to use the complete legal “Felony” system to revive a dead car.

The first thing you should do in the first 30 minutes is when the electricity goes out.

Detailed instructions on creating an incredible “Force Field” around your home.

How to build a suitable-sized “Infinity Coil” for powering your house and ensuring your family’s safety.

Using the “Pencil Squared” method, how you can make seven infinity coils in a short time?

Learn about the “Cosmo generator” that takes electricity from the air.

How to build an infinity coil generator with a Fisher Toy, ideal for individuals on a tight budget.

How does the infinity coil show that God exists by utilizing scriptural origins?

And much more.

[darkagedefenseuse]

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[agirlwhoisaphantom]

a little death - tom riddle x reader

summary: There is a new Defensive of Darrk Arts professor and something about you has captivated his attention

word count: 1635

warnings: age gap (all characters are 18+), taboo romance, teacher-student relationship, tension?, obsessive traits, Somewhat of a cliffhanger

author's note: Hello, it's been a while since I wrote anything, so bare with me. This has been a one shot that has been lingering in my brain and I'm excited for it to finally be out. Can we talk about how beautiful Tom Hughes is???? Italian Translation: Falena - Moth

Pansy caught up to you as you walked down the hallway, holding your books close to your chest. “Have you seen the new Defence Against the Dark Arts professor?” There was an eager tone in her voice, as if she was excited to share the news with you.

Looking over at her, you weren’t too excited, nor did you care about the professor, it was just another class to have to pass. You shook your head as you rolled your eyes. “I have not, nor do I care if there is a new professor.”

She smirked as she looked over at you, playfully bumping into you, which made you hold your books tighter. “You’ll change your mind once you see him.”

Walking into the classroom, you look around, trying to find the professor, but he is nowhere to be seen. Great impression for your first day, huh? You make your way to your seat, place your books on the desk, and take a seat, bringing your backpack onto your lap. You take out a notebook and a pen and set them down on the desk before putting your books away in your bag.

“Hello, class. My name is Professor Riddle, and I will be your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher.” He said in a deep, honeyed tone as he walked towards the front of the class.

You place your attention towards him, noticing all of his features. His black hair fell in short curls, his face was beautifully structured as if it were a statue, and his strong features fell into perfect places. His eyes were ever so calculating in a marine blue as they looked around the room.

His gaze ends up on you, with curiosity evident as he crosses his arms and tilts his head. Tom looked at you as if he was trying to figure you out, and somehow, something about you piqued his interest.

Though he quickly started teaching the class, he continued to steal glances at you throughout the entire hour, his gaze often lingering on you.

You weren’t stressed about your potion exam the next day, but you still wanted to be prepared if something unexpected happened.

As you review your notes on the latest potions being tested, your thoughts drift away. Suddenly, you find yourself daydreaming about Tom. You knew having these thoughts about him was wrong, but you couldn't help but notice how beautiful he was. His deep blue eyes and chiseled jawline left you breathless.

Trying to push these thoughts away, your mind kept reverting to how he said your name. It sounded like he was reading from a poetry book, with a hint of admiration and warmth in his voice.

Standing up from your desk, you feel the need to take a break and clear your mind. You make your way to the door of your dorm and start to head outside. The cool breeze hits your face, and you take a deep breath.

Walking towards the courtyard, you noticed someone sitting on one of the benches reading a book. You were intrigued by how they delicately put down the book as they pulled a cigarette box out of their pockets and put it in their mouth.

You couldn’t tell the features of this person, and you wondered if they were new or someone you had never seen before. As you walked towards them, his features became more apparent, and you noticed it was Tom.

Fuck

Out of all the people to approach, you are approaching the one person you have been trying to avoid having inappropriate thoughts about.

“Good evening, Miss.” he looks up at you, taking the cigarette out of his mouth and placing it between his index finger and middle finger as he notices you approaching him. “Did you need something?”

You shook your head as you held your hands together. “No, just wondering who was out here at these hours. I should get going- “

“I noticed you were struggling in today's class. I can tutor you so you can understand the material better,” he interrupted. He stood up and immediately towered over you. Looking up at him, you hadn’t noticed his height until he stood so close to you.

Him telling you that you were struggling made you upset. Why was he noticing that? Why didn’t he tell me he noticed that during class? All these thoughts were going through your mind as you furrowed your brows and gave him a crooked smile. “I wasn’t struggling,” you scoffed. "Don’t make assumptions about me if you don’t know me. Have a good evening,” you snapped at him as you began to walk away, crossing your arms together.

He started to follow you as he forcefully grabbed your arm, pulling you back and turning you to face him. “Don’t ever speak to me like that ever again.” That soft, honeyed tone disappeared as his voice turned harsh. His eyes narrowed as he tried to intimidate you, but you looked at him with a poker face.

You moved your arm away from his grasp. “What will you do? Fail me?”

“Precisely that,” he says, placing his hands in his coat pockets. A sinister smirk appears on his face.

Your eyes burned with frustration and anger as you stared at him silently. This wasn't how you envisioned your first out-of-class interaction with him. You had hoped for a more cordial and friendly exchange, but instead, you found yourself clenching your fists and biting your tongue.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, you broke the silence and asked, "May I go now?" Your voice was cold and clipped, betraying the anger and disappointment that you felt.

He stepped closer to you, closing the gap between the two of you as he placed his middle finger underneath your chin with his index finger and thumb, tilting your head up, making you look at him as he smirked “You look so delicious when you are angry, Falena.”

“Fuck off, Riddle,” he harshly lets go of your face as he chuckles.

He starts to walk away from you and stops for a second. “I’ll see you around, Falena.”

----

Over the course of the following weeks, you found yourself struggling in class. It seemed like Tom had it out for you, as he was particularly harsh towards you. He gave you assignments that were much more challenging, and he even tested you on spelling that most students had never even heard of before.

There were days when you would lay in bed, feeling thoroughly discouraged and wanting to skip class altogether. But you knew that if you did that, you would be giving him the satisfaction of winning whatever little game he had placed between you.

You had to recollect yourself before knocking on his office door. Taking a deep breath, you knocked on it. Surprised, he answered quickly, “I was expecting you.” He grabbed your hand and pulled you into the office, closing the door.

“I’m not staying long.” You rapidly moved your hand away from his as you crossed your arms together. “What the fuck is your problem? What are you trying to prove with all of the shit that you’ve been doing?” You sounded agitated as you stepped back as you wanted to keep your distance between you and him.

“You are my problem,” he snapped as he closed the gap between you two. “I don’t know what it is from the moment I saw you. You are all I think about. You have invaded every single sense of mine. Whatever you are doing, make it stop.” He looked desperate, wanting answers you could not give him.

Your eyes widen as you shake your head, looking at him confused. “That doesn’t mean you get to make my life a living hell.”

“You already make mine feel that way.”

You felt confused and angry. You wanted to open that door and run back to your dorm, close the door, and never get out. Instead, you stood there breathing the same air as the person who has made it difficult to be around.

He takes a deep breath as he places his hand on your cheek. His gaze softens as his thumb grazes over your cheek. “I shouldn’t be feeling this way towards you. But I can’t help it. You are just so perfect.” That honeyed, deep voice comes back, and geez, how addicting it is listening to it.

You placed your hand on top of his as you leaned into his cold touch. Closing your eyes, you realize something that made you pull his hand away from your face.

“We shouldn’t be doing, Tom,” you whispered as you looked up at him, biting your lip. You take a couple of steps back as you place your hand on the doorknob. You wanted him to stop you from leaving, so why was he standing there staring at you as if he was starved from a touch that he has been craving.

He reaches out for you but stops as he flexes his hand on the side of his leg. “Whether you like it or not, falena, you belong to me.”

“I belong to no one. Goodnight, Tom.” You turn around as you open the door, leaving his office before he can respond.

Walking back to your dorm, you could still feel his hand on your face, as if it were tattooed on your skin.

What did I get myself into? A sigh escapes your lips as you lay down on your bed, staring at the ceiling.

[queenshelby]

An Illicit Affair

Part 11: The Date

Pairing: Cillian Murphy (46) x Reader (23)

Warning: Age-Gap, Taboo Relationship, Infidelity

A week later and about two weeks before the event at which you knew Cillian would be attending, you ran into Max at hospital as he was attending a follow up appointment with James, who was somewhat concerned about his heart murmur. 

Save for a few bruises and cuts that had not yet healed, Max looked relatively fine. 

His face had a gaunt appearance, though, and there were dark circles beneath his eyes. He wore a pair of black jeans and a plain white t-shirt that was wrinkled and loose. It was obvious that he hadn't slept well since the accident happened and you wondered whether he was doing alright.

"Hey," you greeted him cautiously, remembering your recent conversation with him where he asked you out on a date, but you declined. "How are you doing?" you wanted to know nonetheless, and Max glanced at you briefly and gave a faint smile.

"Yeah, I am alright," he muttered, his voice rough and strained. "How about you?" he then asked, genuinely concerned.

"I'm good, thanks," you reassured him, hoping to put his worries at ease as James approached you both, giving you a knowing look of admiration before addressing Max in a professional manner.

"Max," said James, extending his hand out to greet him. "You are looking better," he acknowledged while shaking Max's hand firmly. 

"Thanks, Doc," Max replied, shaking James's hand firmly. "I am feeling better too," Max smiled again weekly before James asked you both to follow him to one of the consultation rooms. 

"You want me to come?" you asked surprised, looking at James with confusion. 

"Yes," James confirmed. "If you don't mind," he went on to say before asking you whether you could take some vitals and run an ECG for Max while he was reviewing Max's records. 

"Sure, James," you stammered reluctantly, feeling a little uncomfortable by the prospect of performing medical tests on your very own ex-boyfriend. "Of course," you added nonetheless, glancing at Max who shrugged casually.

"Alright, then," said James, leading you both to a consultation room.

Once inside, James gestured for Max to sit down on the examination table, while he busied himself with paperwork.

You eyed Max skeptically before explaining the procedures to him.

"So Max, I will start by taking your vitals and then we will perform an electrocardiogram to monitor your heart's electrical activity for about 15 minutes," you shared, handing him a consent form. "This should show whether your murmur has resolved or not," you explained, and Max hesitated for a moment before signing the paper and handing it back to you.

Knowing what was required from his days at med school, Max then took off his t-shirt and James walked out of the room in order to get another file from his office. 

"Isn't he a bit old for you?" Max asked as soon as James disappeared and you began attaching electrodes to his bare chest. 

"Excuse me?" you asked, puzzled by Max's sudden question. "What are you talking about?" you

asked Max, curious to know whom he was referring to.

"The cardiologist," Max answered, his reply raising an eyebrow. "You called him by his first name, and I can see the way he is looking at you," Max added, his gaze falling on the floor before returning to meet yours. "He is like what? Mid-thirties?" he finally told you, rolling his eyes in disgust. 

You stared at Max for a second, feeling slightly annoyed by his insinuation. "He is in his mid-thirties, yes. But we are not dating, if that's what you're implying," you retorted defensively, picking up the clipboard hanging on the wall and scribbling numbers down. "And even if we were, it wouldn't be any of your business, Max. We are not together anymore," you retorted firmly, placing the clipboard back on the wall and taking out a stethoscope to listen to Max's heart.

"I get it, you're hurt because I ended things between us, but don't try to make me feel guilty about men who show an interest in me," you snapped while placing the bell of the stethoscope on Max's chest, listening closely to his heartbeat.

"Please don't flatter yourself Y/N. I don't care about who you are dating or sleeping with these days. I was simply curious," Max argued, staring directly into your eyes with an unreadable expression while you continued to listen to his heartbeat, focusing on the rhythmic lub-dub of his pulse. "In fact, I have been seeing someone else too," Max revealed, his words catching you off guard. "Someone who actually likes me for who I am," he added, a hint of smugness creeping into his voice. "Not for who they want me to be," he finished, casting a pointed glance at you.

You recoiled in disbelief, feeling annoyed by Max's judgmental comment. You tried to brush off the hurt, maintaining your composure.

"Well, that's great, Max," you said, feigning happiness. "I am happy for you," you forced a smile just as James walked back into the room and started some shit-chat after noticing the tension between you and Max. 

"I have seen your father's movie the other day. I thought that it was really good," James commented, shifting the topic abruptly while reading the vitals. 

"Yeah, it was okay," Max responded dismissively before asking about his health.

"So, Doctor, what's the verdict?" Max asked nervously, crossing his legs.

James, still distracted by your heated exchange, cleared his throat loudly before responding. "Well, Max, based on today's tests, your heart murmur seems to have improved on the medication," he announced, his tone optimistic. "We can continue monitoring your condition with regular check-ups to ensure it doesn't cause any problems. It usually doesn't if it's mild, but it is always good to keep an eye on these things," he advised, reaching for a pen to write something down on Max's chart. Max visibly relaxed, relief washing over his face.

"That's great news," he exhaled, cracking a genuine smile. "So, I can go, yeah?" 

Max asked, already reaching for his shirt.

"Yeah, but don't forget to take your antibiotics for another week," James reminded him.

"I won't," Max promised, waving goodbye to both of you and vanishing into the hallway.

"You guys got beef or something?" James teased once he was gone, his voice horse but sarcastic.

"What do you think?" you rolled your eyes, seeing that James knew about the issues between you and Max. 

"Well, I think that you shouldn't have gotten involved with this kid in the first place," suggested James, his voice light but serious. "He seems too immature for you and seeing that his mother already called me five times for a letter to the insurance company, I believe that he is also quite a mommy's boy which is a major red flag, wouldn't you agree?" he continued, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.

"Yeah, well, we aren't together anymore, aren't we?" you replied vaguely, thinking about your past relationship with Max.

"No, luckily for me, you are not," James then winked at you, squeezing your shoulder teasingly. "Which brings me to my question again," he added. "How about dinner tonight, after work?" James asked suddenly, changing the subject entirely.

"Just dinner?" you asked shyly, eager to escape the awkwardness lingering between you and, after James nodded in agreement, you accepted his invitation. 

"Great, I'll pick you up at seven," James confirmed, flashing you a warm smile before leaving the room quietly.

The afternoon dragged on endlessly, and your thoughts kept drifting back to the dinner plans and the upcoming event with Cillian. The anticipation of seeing him again made your heart race with both, excitement and dread, while, at the same time, you looked forward to your date with James and found yourself constantly checking the clock, eagerly awaiting the end of your shift.

By six o'clock, you rushed home to freshen up and change into something more comfortable and appealing.

You opted for a black dress that hugged your curves in all the right places - it was simple yet elegant, perfect for a casual dinner with a colleague.

After applying minimal makeup and tying your hair up in a messy bun, you checked your reflection in the mirror.

Satisfied with your appearance, you grabbed your purse and locked the door behind you.

Outside, the air was chilly, but the scent of summer lingered in the atmosphere.

You hurried down the steps and breathed a sigh of relief when you saw James' car pull up in front of the student accommodation complex.

"You look beautiful," he complimented as you climbed into the passenger seat. You thanked him with a bright smile that showed how much his kind words meant to you.

"So, where are we going?" you asked excitedly, fastening your seatbelt.

"I booked a table at Gordon Ramsay's new restaurant in town," James admitted proudly, grinning ear to ear. "It's supposed to be amazing, and, at this stage, you only get in with connections," he added, adjusting the rearview mirror.

"But, hey, don't worry," he quickly added. "I've got friends in high places," he chuckled confidently, knowing that his reputation often opened doors for him.

"Right," you responded quietly, adjusting your seat belt while cringing internally at his arrogance before ignoring the comment nonetheless. 

"Anyway," you changed the subject lightly, "thanks for arranging this for us. I am sure it will be an unforgettable experience," you forced out a smile before leaning forward slightly to observe the busy streets of London passing by as you drove to the exclusive eatery.

"Oh, you're welcome," James replied humbly, turning the key in the ignition and pulling away smoothly and, within less than 20 minutes, you arrived at the bustling restaurant.

"Ready, gorgeous?" James asked flirtatiously, opening the car door for you to step out elegantly, and you nodded, feeling your nerves kick in as you followed the maître d'hôtel inside.

"Welcome to Gordon Ramsay's new venture," the hostess greeted you politely, guiding you both to a cozy corner booth and, without even giving you the chance to look at the menu, James ordered a bottle of champaign and two set banquets. 

"Thank you," you whispered softly, taking a sip of the crisp sparkling wine whilst watching the waiters scurrying around, serving the patrons with deft precision. Intrigued by the culinary creations, you peeked at the dishes served around you and, as you gazed around appreciatively, your gaze landed on a familiar figure who sat across the room.

"Fuck," you whispered under your breath, a knot forming in your stomach.

"What's wrong?" James asked worriedly, swiveling in his chair to look at the source of your distress.

"Nothing," you lied, averting your gaze, but James had already noticed who you were looking at. 

"Shit, is that Christopher Nolan?" James asked, squinting across the restaurant where Cillian was sitting, accompanied by the famous director and his wife.

"I don't know," you mumbled, averting your gaze and sipping your champagne. "Maybe," you agreed, desperately wanting to change the subject as you noticed Cillian spotting you. 

Cillian's gaze met yours almost instantly and his eyes widened in recognition while the knot in your stomach tightened, and you prayed that he would not come over and talk to you. 

Unfortunately for you though, fate had different plans, and Cillian stood up after seemingly excusing himself from his companions.

He crossed the restaurant toward you, and as he drew nearer, your heart pounded against your rib cage, threatening to burst free.

You sucked in a deep breath, preparing yourself for the inevitable collision with Cillian while James appeared cheerful to meet the famous actor again. 

"Y/N, how are you?" Cillian murmured before also greeting James. "Doctor Connor," he addressed your companion politely while shaking his hand in a professional manner. "It's nice to see you again," Cillian greeted him warmly, his gaze then shifting over to you, waiting for an answer. 

"I am good Cillian," you managed to squeak out, swallowing the lump that had formed in your throat. "How about you?" you asked Cillian, trying to remain composed. 

"Not bad," Cillian responded shyly, running a hand through his cropped hair. "Just busy, I suppose," he admitted, casting a fleeting glance at James before turning his attention back to you. "So," he continued, his voice dropping to a lower register. "I guess I will see you at the charity dinner in two weeks?" he asked, his gaze locking onto yours.

"Yeah, I guess so," you responded weakly, feeling cornered by the situation.

"Great," Cillian replied, his voice sounding triumphant. "Looking forward to it," he added, his eyes twinkling inadvertently. 

You swallowed hard, forcing a weak smile back at him while nodding politely. Without saying anything further, Cillian bid you both farewell and returned to his table.

"Well, that was unexpected," James uttered, looking dumbfounded. "And he seems rather weird around you," he added, his brow furrowing. "Why is that?" James then asked curiously and you shrug your shoulders.

"Yeah, probably because I used to date his son and things didn't end well. I don't know," you sighed, scratching your head nervously. "So, I guess it's complicated," you added, gulping down your champagne and, luckily, James did not enquire any further. 

Instead, he decided to steer the conversation towards more pleasant topics, such as your favorite movies and TV shows.

As time passed, the restaurant filled up quicker than expected, and the ambiance grew more vibrant. The laughter and clinking glasses merged with a lively musical score, adding to the enchanting evening and it wasn't until 10 o'clock that you called it a night. 

James asked you whether you wanted to come back to his place and stay there for the night but you declined his offer, insisting that you wanted to return home alone.

Thus, just a like a gentleman would, he drove you back to your apartment complex, dropped you off at the door and gave you a kiss on the cheek, promising to see you again tomorrow.

"Goodnight, Y/N," he said before driving away, leaving you standing there in the dark, staring at his car disappearing into the distance.

A sense of unease washed over you as you let yourself into your building, thinking about the encounter with Cillian earlier. He seemed distant yet oddly aware of the connection between you.

There was a sense of longing in his eyes, a desire hidden beneath layers of restraints and, with that, your thoughts drifted to him now once again. 

You longed for him too and, as if he was reading your mind, a message from Cillian popped up on your phone at 10.35pm.

"You looked beautiful in that dress," was all that he wrote and, yet, somehow, those few words had the power to stir up a whirlwind of emotions within you, causing you to be both upset and smitten by his comment. 

Still standing at your doorstep, your fingers hovering over the keys, unsure how to respond to Cillian's message, you felt a strong urge to confront him about how abruptly he had ended things between you, but then again you also understood where he was coming from. He was a married man after all. He was much older than you too and, let's not forget that he is also your ex-boyfriend's father.

The odds were against you, but there was something magnetic about Cillian, drawing you in like a moth to a flame.

But how could you give in to your desires? How could you possibly risk breaking up a family for the sake of your own selfish needs? And what about James? Was he just a distraction or could he become something more than just a friend?

These questions remained with you for the next two weeks leading up to the charity dinner, filling your mind with constant uncertainty which, however, in the end, evolved into nothingness when you saw him again at the event, looking handsome as ever, wearing a grey suit matched with a white buttoned up shirt. 

To be continued...

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[defectivevillain]

professional courtesy

pairing: Miles Edgeworth/Reader (can be platonic or romantic)

*reader is racially ambiguous, pronouns are unspecified, and physical descriptors aren't used*

summary:

Miles Edgeworth always has the most recent evidence and an updated autopsy report when he prosecutes a case. His secret? You: a talented LAPD detective with no honest concept of “time off work.”

word count: 3.5k | ao3 version

warnings: mentions of sleep deprivation, fatigue

This snippet is focused on Miles Edgeworth/Reader and the dynamic can be perceived as romantic or platonic. The reader is a detective employed at the LAPD. The reader is also racially ambiguous and gender is unspecified. 

Since this fic is, well, fiction, some parts may be unrealistic. Keep that in mind before you read. (For example, this takes place in a rather unrealistic universe in which Miles Edgeworth isn’t in love with Phoenix Wright. lol.)

You’ve been working in the Criminal Affairs Department at the Los Angeles Police Department for a few years now. You started out as a wide-eyed rookie, but within a few weeks, you quickly learned that detective work isn’t the perfect, harmless job you thought it was. You still love your position, of course, but you’ve investigated rather gruesome cases in your time at the LAPD. Now, you find yourself accustomed to the scent of formaldehyde and the sight of blood splattered across skin. 

Through your position at the LAPD as an investigator, you’ve met your fair share of interesting characters—namely, defense attorneys and prosecutors. Unfortunately, interaction with legal professionals comes hand-in-hand with your investigations. You can’t remember the last time you had the pleasure of performing an independent investigation. You’re almost always hindered by a prosecutor breathing down your neck or a defense attorney frantically pressing you for evidence you don’t have. The constant presence of overbearing lawyers is just something you’ve grown used to. 

They aren’t all so bad, you think to yourself. Miles Edgeworth, Klavier Gavin, Simon Blackquill, and Nahyuta Sadmadhi are all rather unique individuals, but they care about justice and aren’t falling prey to the dark age of the law. You enjoy working with all of them, even when Klavier can’t shut up about his latest concert or Simon’s hawk constantly uses your head as a perch. Truthfully, Miles Edgeworth is the most tolerable of the group—but you’d never admit that aloud. 

You’re in your office one night, reviewing some paperwork and thinking about the recent case you were assigned, when you hear a knock on the door. You give the person permission to enter and the door falls open, revealing Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth himself. He’s wearing his typical prosecutor garb—his burgundy-maroon suit and cravat. Glasses are perched on his nose and he pushes them up a little. “Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth,” you remark, blinking at him. “Good to see you.”

“And you.” The prosecutor responds, his arms crossed over his chest as his gaze flits about your office. You suddenly feel strangely self-conscious, despite the knowledge that your office is very sparsely decorated. There’s an award mounted on the wall from last year and a small photo of you and your friends on your desk, but that’s about the extent of your decorations. 

“Are you here for the updated autopsy report?” You ask, deciding to cut to the chase. From what you know of the prosecutor, he doesn’t quite enjoy small talk. Indeed, Edgeworth looks relieved at the thought of being spared from casual conversation; he then nods at your question. You sigh and open your desk drawer, procuring the newest autopsy report. You hold it out to him and he takes it with a murmured thanks. The prosecutor’s eyes are locked on the paper as he takes in the new information. You watch him for a few seconds, before taking the opportunity to rub your eyes roughly. You’re rather tired, you have to admit. You should’ve gone home hours ago. 

“Detective.” You flinch, opening your eyes to find Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth staring at you with a blank expression. You’re briefly hit with an intense wave of embarrassment at the thought of zoning out in front of the Chief Prosecutor himself. “The commissioner didn’t send you home,” the prosecutor remarks. You think his statement is meant to be a question, despite the fact that his tone doesn’t fluctuate from his typical flat affect. 

“Well, he did,” you grimace, remembering his demands for you to return home immediately. He’d be furious with you right now. In fact, the commissioner pulled you aside a few weeks ago to inquire about your “workaholic tendencies.” You meant to take him seriously and even assured him that you’d start to leave work on time instead of staying late. But here you are—sitting in your office late at night with your findings from your after-hours investigation. 

“Yet, you’re still here.” Edgeworth remarks with an intent gaze. Somehow, his frown only seems to deepen. 

“Yes, well, I… felt like something was missing,” you decide to admit. The prosecutor is trustworthy. Besides, you’re sure he has much better things to do than report you to the commissioner. The notion then reminds you of Dick Gumshoe—particularly, a conversation you had with him the other day about his much-to-be-desired diet of instant noodles. You shake your head in a half-hearted attempt to clear your thoughts. “Here, look at these.” You pull papers from the file on your desk and extend them to him. Edgeworth’s gaze follows your gesture and his eyebrows furrow.

“The suspect’s fingerprints on the corpse,” Edgeworth remarks blankly. “Yes.” His eyebrows furrow. The prosecutor is evidently wondering why you’re pointing that out, considering the evidence is extremely self-explanatory. You take a deep breath. 

“Look at the edge here,” you suggest, pointing to the very edge of the photo in question. It’s just barely visible and you watch as Edgeworth squints at the photograph for a long moment. For a second, it looks as if he’s not seeing it. You’re close to pointing the area out again when his eyes widen in realization. 

“Powder,” Edgeworth realizes aloud. He crosses his arms over his chest and falls back into his unusually straight posture. His fingers tap against the crook of his arm rhythmically, in what you guess to be a restless gesture. “The prints were transplanted.” 

“I believe so.” You nod. 

The prosecutor frowns and looks askance. He seems to deliberate for a moment before turning his attention back to you. “Can you do something for me?”

“Sure…?” You respond, thrown off by the ambiguity of the statement. The prosecutor explains the task he’d like you to perform and you begin to understand. Acting on his orders shouldn’t take too long, hopefully. However, you are in a time crunch—what with the trial being scheduled for tomorrow morning. Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth leaves you with a murmured word of gratitude and a quick farewell. You stare at your closed office door for a moment, wondering if you dreamt up that interaction. The handwritten note sitting on your desk—created mere moments ago by Edgeworth—is proof that the prosecutor’s request was all too real. You don’t waste any time after that, immediately walking out of the police department and getting into your car. The Chief Prosecutor’s request isn’t too difficult—you simply need to revisit the crime scene and make sure everything is in order. Then you’ll return home, eat something, take a quick shower, and go to sleep. Everything will be fine. You won’t overwork yourself. You certainly won’t stay at the crime scene late into the night, until the point when you bear witness to the sun rising in the morning sky. 

These promises fade into obscurity the moment you reach the crime scene. Your investigative mind turns on and all you can think about are fingerprints, footprints, and murder weapons. You meticulously review each piece of evidence for forensic data, in addition to reviewing the entire scene in your head several times. Your efforts are far from a waste of time, as you manage to tie up some loose ends and even determine that the murder weapon carries multiple sets of prints. Your knees are aching as you bend down towards the ground and survey anything of consequence. Time is entirely inconsequential. All you know is that the flashlight you had needed when you arrived is no longer useful, as hints of the sunrise begin to illuminate the area in a hazy dawn glow. 

When your morning alarm goes off as you’re standing at the edge of the crime scene, you’re able to recognize that you may have gotten carried away. Just maybe. You sigh and trudge back to the car, before driving to the courthouse. When you arrive, you’re able to take a quick nap in the car and eat a protein bar you find in the console. Unfortunately, your nap is more than quick—it doesn’t last more than three minutes before you hear a knock on your window. It’s your least favorite defense attorney, Duff Endyu. 

“Well, hello, Detective!” Duff remarks as you roll down your window, his cheery smile immediately ruining any of the rest you acquired from your brief rest. “Catching up on some Z’s, are we?” His grin seems to have a mocking edge.

“Yes,” you sigh, unwilling to entertain his attempts at provocation. “Are the doors open?” You look over to the courthouse entrance. 

“I believe they are, sport,” he responds, patting a hand on the area where the unopened window rests and pacing towards the building. You take a deep breath and pinch the bride of your nose. It takes you a few moments to cross the parking lot and make it to the doors. Once you do, you find that the waiting room is blissfully empty. You sigh in relief and take a seat on the armchair, crossing a leg at the knee and pinching the bridge of your nose. You want nothing more than to fall asleep, but you know that would be rather unprofessional. Besides, you have a job to do.

You spend your time reviewing the information you gathered throughout your investigation, before preparing your statements and testimony as the detective on the case. You’re typically the first person called to the stand, so that you can explain the case to the judge and shed light on the evidence. 

“Detective.” You flinch and look up, only to find Miles Edgeworth staring down at you. You resist the strange urge to get up from your seat and instead greet him. “Good morning.”

“Good morning,” you respond, pretending that you don’t need to blink the traces of exhaustion from your eyes. 

“Did you have a chance to do what I asked?” 

“Yes, I did,”  You’re about to explain when the bailiff interrupts and asks you to go into the courtroom. You send an apologetic smile to the prosecutor, before slipping into the empty courtroom. The judge is the only person in the room, and he seems to be frowning at something on the surface of his bench. When he notices your entrance, he motions for you to come closer. 

You’re familiar with this judge and have worked with him several times before. The thought reassures you, as you know you won’t have to sugarcoat your words or pretend to be someone you’re not on the stand. The two of you have formed a surface-level understanding of one another, which makes your job that much easier. 

The judge asks you a few questions about your investigation and you answer them to the best of your ability. Eventually, he seems satisfied, because he nods and dismisses you. You never get the chance to speak with Edgeworth and brief him on your findings before the trial, but you know he’ll learn more once you take the stand. 

The judge begins the trial with the standard procedure, questioning both the defense and the prosecution before Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth makes his case for the conviction of the defendant. Not for the first time, you find yourself impressed by how succinct and persuasive the man’s argument is. Endme, the attorney for the defendant, seems a bit intimidated. You think you would be too, if you were going up against the chief prosecutor himself. 

The judge then calls you to the stand. You explain the crime and describe the crime scene in detail, before Endme, the defense attorney, cross examines you. His cross-examination isn’t super thorough, and you suspect it’s because your claims are all backed up with at least one piece—if not multiple pieces—of evidence. Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth seems to have quite the easy time with dismantling the defense’s argument. However, since you never got the chance to brief him before the trial, you’re forced to step in and correct an assumption when you hear it. 

“Actually,” you break in, wincing at how everyone’s gazes lock onto you. You take a deep breath. You can do this. “Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth is right, but… an investigation earlier today revealed that the murder weapon actually contained the prints of the witness, in addition to the defendant.” 

Edgeworth’s eyebrows steadily climb up his forehead. You want to feel guilty, but you know you didn’t leave him out of the loop on purpose. In fact, you were about to relay your findings to him when you were swiftly interrupted. Instead, you allow yourself a brief moment of pride. You caused that disbelieving expression on the chief prosecutor’s face. You found that evidence…!

The trial, understandably, is suitably affected by that revelation. You’re soon dismissed from the stand, as Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth calls the witness to the stand. You get the feeling he’s going to absolutely grill them—to see if they play a more active role in this case. 

Truthfully, you want to leave the courthouse and go to sleep, but you know you should stay to see how the trial plays out. Thankfully, Edgeworth uses the forensic evidence you found to bolster his argument and, after only about an hour, the courtroom doors swing open and the chief prosecutor appears. His eyes narrow in on you immediately and there’s a frown on his face. You feel any good karma you may have accrued earlier completely dissipate. 

“Detective,” Edgeworth says with a sigh. This can’t be good, you think to yourself. “I appreciate your efforts, and the fact that you did what I asked you to do.” He pauses. But…?  “However, I do not recall telling you to avoid sleep entirely.” His eyes meet yours and you realize he must’ve noticed your fatigue earlier or the dark circles that currently reside under your own eyes. 

“I know,” you acquiesce. The prosecutor nods knowingly, and you suddenly feel the need to defend yourself. “Still. I had a gut feeling there was something missing—and I was right.” Edgeworth sighs loudly. You raise your eyebrows at him knowingly, inviting him to argue with you. Fortunately for you, there’s not much of an outlet for him to argue—since your choice to continue investigating procured decisive evidence for the trial. The prosecutor evidently comes to that realization, because he crosses his arms over his chest and levels you with a furious gaze that spells you silent.

“Come on, Detective,” he remarks. “Unless you’d like the budget cut that Detective Gumshoe is so fond of.” You sigh deeply and follow after the prosecutor. This is the first time he’s threatened to reduce your salary. You certainly hope it will be the last—you’d rather not rewrite your budget for the coming month. 

You follow after Edgeworth, who has yet to offer an explanation for why you’re supposed to follow him. The prosecutor paces out of the courtroom and walks through the lines of cars in the parking lot until he reaches a red sports car. Your eyebrows climb up your forehead as you see him unlock it. 

“This is your car?” You hear yourself ask. 

“You seem surprised,” Edgeworth notes with a tinge of amusement. He opens the door for you, allowing you to enter, before closing it behind you. The prosecutor then walks around the car and gets into the driver’s seat. Edgeworth looks at you expectantly, evidently waiting for elaboration. 

“Sorry, you just didn’t seem the type,” you say. You quickly regret uttering the statement aloud after seeing the prosecutor raise an eyebrow; thankfully, he lets the comment slide. Instead, you get into the car and awkwardly stare down at your hands. You feel intensely out of place in this car, sitting next to the Chief Prosecutor himself. Edgeworth doesn’t seem to notice your internal panic, instead beginning to pull out of the courthouse parking lot and drive down the street. “Where are we going?” You eventually find the courage to ask.

“My office,” Edgeworth responds. You feel your heart stall in your chest. He isn’t going to fire you, is he? You’re not sure if he has that power… but you wouldn’t be surprised if he did possess that kind of administrative authority. Your fear must show on your face, because the prosecutor huffs in amusement before turning to look at you for a brief moment. “Lighten up, Detective.” Contrary to your expectations, you aren’t given any more explanation than that. Instead, you’re left to sit silently as Edgeworth 

He’s taking you to his office. Oh no. You’re really going to get fired, aren’t you? Your heart races in your chest and you feel your hands twitching at your sides. Edgeworth leads the way to the Prosecutor’s Building, walking through the underground garage before reaching the door and opening it for you. You’ve been to the building before, but you’ve never been to the underground garage—which leaves you feeling a little turned around. You suspect there’s an elevator that will lead to Edgeworth’s office. However, the chief prosecutor walks past it and instead ascends the staircase next to it. You shrug and follow after him. One flight of stairs won’t be too bad. 

One flight of stairs passes in the blink of an eye. However, Edgeworth doesn’t exit as you expect—instead he continues climbing up the stairs. Are you going to be taking the stairs all the way up to his office? From what you remember, quite a few of the offices are on the higher floors. You decide to keep quiet and follow his lead. 

If only you had known that Edgeworth’s office number was on the twelfth floor . By the time you climb up the last set of stairs and reach the twelfth floor, you want to collapse on the ground and never get up. Edgeworth, on the other hand, isn’t even winded. You manage to catch your breath on the short walk from the staircase to his office, but you know your legs will be sore tomorrow. 

You’ve never been in the Chief Prosecutor’s office before. It has more life than you thought it might, with a burgundy couch off to the left side, an ornate wooden desk in the center of the room, and rows of files lining the walls on the right. There’s a small figurine of the Steel Samurai and an award that you recognize to be the Prosecutor Trophy. The space looks like a good mix of professionalism and nonchalance that you think you’d like to emulate in your own office.  

Despite your expectations, Edgeworth still doesn't give you an explanation for why you’re here. Instead, he settles into the chair at his desk and opens his computer. He’s quiet as he types on his computer. After a few moments of standing awkwardly, you decide to move and sit on the couch. 

You don’t know how long you wait there, anticipating a remark from the chief prosecutor. Unfortunately, now that you’re left here with nothing to do, you feel your energy slipping away. Your exhaustion is beginning to catch up to you. You didn’t get much sleep ( read: any sleep) last night, thanks to your impromptu investigation. Despite your fatigue threatening to knock you out, you know can’t fall asleep in front of the Chief Prosecutor. You have to stay awake. 

Surely, there’s something you could be doing right now. Your eyes are stinging from exhaustion and your blinks feel twice as long as normal. You rub your eyes roughly and pay a glance at Edgeworth, who is scrawling something down on a piece of paper.. Just what are you supposed to be doing here? The prosecutor hasn’t spoken since you left the car. Edgeworth isn’t shy about assigning you work to do, so why is he suddenly so silent?

Despite all these recognitions, and the intimate knowledge that it will not look good if you fall asleep, your exhaustion wins out. One moment, you’re staring blankly ahead at the wall of files; the next, your eyes are slipping shut and you’re falling asleep.

Your sleep is remarkably undisturbed, despite being in the company of another person. You occasionally hear the scrawling sound of writing or the pattering sounds of typing, but otherwise, the office is blissfully silent. Your head rests on your hand and you exhale slowly, feeling the day’s stressors slowly slip away.

You don’t intend to sleep for long. But, when you wake up, you find that it’s dark outside. There’s an added warmth that you didn’t have before. Upon further investigation, you find that there’s a familiar burgundy jacket draped over you. Is this… Edgeworth’s jacket? Your eyes widen as the characteristic burgundy color. 

Your phone pings, drawing you out of your thoughts. You reach towards it and power it on, only to find that it’s nearly 6 p.m. The trial ended hours ago! You look around for Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth, but he’s nowhere in sight. All you see is the familiar wall of files, the chessboard in the corner of the room, and a mug of tea with a note next to it. 

Wait. A mug of tea with a note? You frown and look down at the coffee table, finding a mug of warm tea with steam rising out of it and a handwritten note. The note reads: 

Visiting the department. Expect a more strictly enforced schedule in the future.   -M.   PS: Stay as long as you need. 

You smile to yourself.

“Duff Endyu” → “defend you.” lol.

hehehehehehheeeee… I just want to fall asleep in Edgeworth's office and for Edgeworth to look down at me and be filled with an inexplicable burst of fondness. is that really too much to ask?>??

Did “a more strictly enforced schedule” make sense? I was trying to find a characteristic way for Miles to say that your overtime would be prevented (aka that you’ll have to “clock out” and actually leave, instead of staying for hours after).

I just realized Miles’s initials are M.E.. Lollll.

anyway, thanks for reading! <333

TAGLIST: @its-ares @excusemeasibangmyheadonawall

[destiny-aesthetics]

^ Communications to the Vanguard; Letter from the Stranger [Elisabeth "Elsie" Bray]

-----------------------------------------------------

Destiny 2 [Bungie] | Beyond Light [Collector's Edition]

ACCESS: RESTRICTED/REDACTED DECRYPTION KEY: ekeriPC6N$ spoof REP #: 121-EUROPA-BAN AGENT(S): CHA-319 SUBJ: Review of interdict on Europa landings. ASSOCIATIONS: Active interdict; Awoken, military commitments of; Bray, Clovis; Bray Tech; cryohazard; Deep Stone Crypt; Enceladus; Golden Age; Io; Jovians; Nine; Titan, moon of Saturn; Vex

1. Prior to the Taken War, the Reef maintained an interdict upon the poorly navigable Jovian moons. That interdict has failed, allowing Guardians to begin (politely put) "reclaiming" these satellites. The sixth moon, however, still falls under Vanguard interdict. To borrow an old adage: "All these worlds are yours, except Europa. Attempt no bounties there." 2. I have been asked to review this interdict's continued necessity. My first impression is that its Europan files are so heavily redacted as to encourage the very expeditions they are presumably meant to deter. Have you ever tried to tell a Hunter that they can't go somewhere AND can't know why? 3. Europa's surface is hazardous. Intense radiation mangles both flesh and machinery. Peak temperature at the poles never climbs more than 50 degrees above absolute zero; the equator reaches a balmy 110 above. This moon was never T-formed and has no proper atmosphere. Tidal stress tortures and crackles the surface, leading to frequent cryovolcanism. There are many ways to die on Europa, but we are speaking of Guardians here. Risk of death alone cannot justify a no-landings edict.

4. The subcrustal ocean is two to three times the volume of Earth's. Life exists down there, but we have forgotten how to reach it. Rumors of some vague abyssal connection to Titan and Enceladus are unsubstantiated, and in this agent's opinion, probably nonsense. So long as Guardians do not take up sport hunting, protection of native life is not grounds for an edict. 5. A heavily armed platform of Golden Age origin keeps station over the moon. It maneuvers using either Hall-effect electrical thrust or some kind of anchor in the Jovian magnetosphere. Ordinarily this would be worth investigating, but the files suggest that the platform is a rare example of an active and unpredictably hostile Golden Age defense asset. Approach at your own risk. (Interesting note-some suggest that jumpships of the Eon series are not as rapidly engaged - this matches what we know of their designer. Jumpships are rare and valuable, so best to keep a safe distance.) 6. Recent close flybys have imaged a Golden Age compound bearing the Bray Tech insignia built in the Europan ice. The same imagery captures thousands, if not tens of thousands, of hibernating or destroyed Vex. Unlike all other Vex presences on Venus, Mars, Mercury, Io, or Nessus, there is no sign of major construction. This suggests a Vex strike force, rather than a permanent presence. What did they want? We have fought Vex before, and early aggression against their designs has always proven critical. Their simple presence cannot justify an interdict.

7. Through negotiation and horse-trading with her superiors, Awoken Paladin Kamala Rior provided me with a device capable of sundry high-physics measurements I will not detail. It reveals that Europa is saturated and interpenetrated with dark matter loops. This is a sign of the interest and attention of the Nine. Their power and influence depend on the mass of nearby stellar bodies, and Europa falls within the sphere of Jupiter-as mighty a gravitational gatherer as anything outside the Sun itself. But even in this bastion of the Nine, Europa is a focus of particularly intense observation. We have often speculated that Xûr is a construct made from the repossessed body of a Jovian colonist… but there are no known records of colonies on Europa. So what draws the Nine here? Unclear. Their interests are opaque. In any case, the gaze of the Nine is no reason to prohibit Europa- Guardians have gone much further into their influence before. 8. No known signs of Ahamkara or other ontopathic predators occur on Europa. Perhaps there are wishing-sharks in the abyssal deep, but that is purely my fancy. No grounds for interdict here. 9. Europa is a traditional stopover for Fallen raiders tanking up on reaction mass. Mithrax, VIP #3987, relays vague reports of a taboo no-go area around the Golden Age station. This prohibition apparently goes beyond fear of its weapons and could be related to the Vex. There is allegedly "something that cannot be stolen from." Tantalizing, but not grounds for interdict. 10. Many Exos have fragmented memories concerning ice sheets and Jupiter in the sky. Europa would be a logical origin for those memories, especially given the presence of Bray Tech assets. This seems to militate towards an investigation.

11.The instruments Paladin Rior provided are extremely unreliable in the vicinity of Europa. I cannot determine whether this is a result of poor construction, my own inexpert use, or the presence of something aberrant. 12. This is hardly a well-vetted piece of intelligence, but something about the imagery and lore I've collected gives me an extremely bad feeling. Something is wrong here. 13. In conclusion, I cannot find strong strategic reasons to maintain the interdict on Europa. We lifted the interdict on the Moon not five years ago, resulting in a series of strategic key victories and intelligence findings… but also triggering the arrival of Oryx, an event that gave Ghaul his Light-suppressing technology and ultimately led to the awakening of the lunar intruder. Perhaps Europa will prove as consequential? We cannot shrink from new discoveries simply because they may lead to new challenges. Victory, after all, requires escalation.

I recommend LIFTING THE INTERDICT. MESSAGE ENDS [Recommendation refused on grounds of compartmentalized information. Unable to share; please trust that your analysis has not been ignored or discarded out of hand. Regrets - IKO/0061]

----------------------------------------------------- Guardian- This is an artifact of Darkness, and now I entrust it to you. Do not take this charge lightly. I have seen firsthand what its power an do Guardians who wield it… even to you. Like all new ground, it can prove treacherous to walk. Listen to your Little Light, and remember that you will live with choices forever. it you. My grandfather came to Europa before the Collapse to seek immortality. He thought he was chosen to lead humanity to the future. His experiments to this end were… hideous. Despite my qualms, collaborated with him. I accept my responsibility in full; I would have, know everything. "O nymph, in your orisons, be all my sins remember'd." You, nymph, but the principle holds, yes? We must know what he did with the power you now grasp. I have included a hard copy of the logs I've deciphered so far. Reader beware. My grandfather was worse than you know. Your stranger I remain, E

[room-surprise]

Dungeon Meshi Anime Review, Season 1, Episode 12 review

Red Dragon Part 2!

This one was also overall good, great performances all around, beautiful animation by Trigger. Sorry this is going up so late!

More thoughts:

They did not put in the continuation of the Namari, Kiki and Kaka resurrection office scene here like we thought they might... So why did they have the scene with Namari at all??? Instead of wasting that time to show that Namari... doesn't know Falin's age, and that Falin's body isn't in the office (we already knew this) they could have instead shown Namari interacting with Kiki and Kaka? Learning their story? Telling her own? Literally anything else. They included this scene but didn't do ANY of the most important parts (explaining details of how resurrection works) and instead left something that is mostly unimportant... So weird.

I know in the previous episode I complained about the lack of the skull shot, where Laios pulls Falin's skull out of the hair mat and it looks like a baby's head coming out of a vaginal opening… But in this episode they made the opening in the dragon's body behind Falin look like a vagina instead, so maybe they were trying to make up for it lol.

Wish they'd left in Chilchuck and Laio's brief conversation about if there's any way for them to profit off of the dragon's body. They mention Laios' savings, but it would have been nice to establish more firmly that Laios and party *make a living* off of the dungeon and that not having anything (treasure, monster bodies) to bring back is a big problem. Going into the dungeon is a JOB and they are not doing it very well!

(This will be important later to understand what the hell Kabru's deal is (ie: laios' dungeon behavior is illogical because he's not making money by going in, so why is he going into the dungeon?), so lack of clarity on the subject is unfortunate.)

I wish there was some way for them to tweak the dark elf comment because anime onlies and people who only read the manga are now going to think dark elves (drow) exist in dungeon meshi. It would be really nice if the anime added something from the extra materials explaining that Chilchuck is just being racist and ignorant lmao and that's why Marcille's annoyed about it. Alas.

Interesting how The Bath Scene was changed. They turned the original mood from slightly menacing foreshadowing to much more cute and flirtatious. Marcille is blushing and tilting her head towards Falin now, leaning in... She looks much less tired, Falin's no longer looming over her, but at the same level as she is, and Marcille is looking directly in front of herself, instead of up at Falin. Also Marcille's hand is at a lower, more natural position for hand-holding... Not up by her face, like a defensive gesture.

I don't know if this is good or bad really, just different. I personally preferred the more ominous tone from the manga, where the shadow Falin cast was more obvious, and Falin was placed higher above Marcille and Marcille looking up at her.

[nitrateglow]

Thoughts on Napoleon (2023)

Saw the Napoleon movie last night and was pretty disappointed. It was my most anticipated film this year and wow... maybe the 4-hour cut is better? Because this movie just felt psychologically shallow and overly compressed. 2 1/2 hours just isn't enough time to cover three decades of history.

Not that this film is good history. I cringed at Ridley Scott's pathetic defense of his historical inaccuracies: "You weren't there, I wasn't there, stfu, I can do whatever I want." Did anyone tell Ridley about this thing called primary sources? Or historical records? Or biographies and history books? Like, THAT'S HOW WE KNOW ABOUT HISTORICAL EVENTS IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Like, I was prepared for basic inaccuracies when I saw how they depicted Marie Antoinette's execution in the trailer (no shorn hair, not in white). But man... they really oversimplify the French Revolution and never go into why Napoleon is such a fascinating historical figure, both revered and despised, with an incredibly complicated legacy.

Agnes Poirer's review has a great passage which sums up my frustration with the film as a Napoleon biopic:

"[Ridley Scott] even seems ignorant of the fact that there are two men in Napoleon: there is Bonaparte, a hero of the French Revolution who gave France and Europe institutions of the Enlightenment era that still exist today, and who liberated Jewish communities from their European ghettos; and there is Napoleon, the hero turned weary authoritarian ruler, whose military campaigns drained a whole nation of its youth and wealth. Beyond facts, Scott’s great historical deficiency is to ignore the politics; instead giving us Napoleon’s tactics on the battlefield as a mirror to his sex life. It’s inept, crass and boring."

There's often the sentiment that historically inaccurate movies can be forgiven somewhat if they make for compelling drama. The problem with Napoleon is that the real history IS compelling drama and Scott's film is just shallow spectacle with the occasional goofy gag masquerading as satire. The filmmakers seem to be going for dark comedy, but the approach only sporadically works because much of the humor falls flat (I saw this in an almost full theater and the comedy scenes mostly played to dead silence-- I felt secondhand embarrassment for the actors at times). The humor just consists of Napoleon being awkward or shouting meme-able things ("DESTINY HAS BROUGHT ME THIS LAMB CHOP!" *tries to start food fight*). Yeah, The Death of Stalin it is not.

Joaquin Phoenix's performance is also one-note and static-- his Napoleon never seems to age, visually or inwardly, and he never captures the man's famous charisma, so I never bought that any army would possess an ounce of loyalty to him. Vanessa Kirby fares better as the alluring and tragic Josephine, but even her performance felt compromised and choppy-- probably due to this being whittled down from the 4-hour cut.

Aside from Phoenix's Grumpy Cat face Napoleon and Kirby's Josephine, none of the other characters leave much of an impression, good or bad. Historical figures flit in and out of the story, barely making more than uninteresting cameos. I felt like I was watching a clipshow for a miniseries, not a self-contained movie. If you don't know the basic outline of the history being depicted, I can only imagine how confusing this movie must be.

Ugh, this was just so disappointing! I was never bored while watching it, but I just left the theater empty. The more I think about it, the less I like it.

[graysoncritic]

A (Negative) Review of Tom Taylor's Nightwing Run - Bibliography

Introduction Who is Dick Grayson? What Went Wrong? Dick's Characterization What Went Wrong? Barbara Gordon What Went Wrong? Bludhaven (Part 1, Part 2) What Went Wrong? Melinda Lin Grayson What Went Wrong? Bea Bennett What Went Wrong? Villains Conclusion Bibliography

Below the cut is a list of all sources used for the essay A Negative Review of Tom Taylor's Nightwing Run

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Bells, JL “Success in Stasis: Dick Grayson’s Thirty Years as a Boy Wonder.”Dick Grayson, Boy Wonder: Scholars and Creators on 75 years of Robin, Nightwing, and Batman edited by Kristen L. Geaman, McFarland & Company, Inc., Publishers, 2015, pp. 08-27

Borsellino, Mary “‘A lot like Robin if you close your eyes.’ Displacement of meaning in the Post-Modern Age,  2006

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Braxi, Steve, “On Superman, Shootings, and the Reality of Superheroes” Comics Bookcase, September 2021

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Dixon, Chuck; Grayson, Devin; Peterson, Scott; writers. Ha, Gene; Scott, Damion; Land, Greg; Stelfreeze, Brian; Guice, Jackson; Eaglesham, Dale; Floyd, John; Jimenez, Phil; Brown, Eliot R.; McDaniel, Scott; Nolan, Graham; Rosado, William; Kuhn, Andy, illustrators. DC Secret Files: Nightwing Secret Files #1. DC Secret Files: Nightwing Secret Files #1 no. 01, e-book ed. DC Comics, 1999

Dixon, Chuck, writer. McDaniel, Scott, illustrator The Freebooters. Nightwing. 03, e-book ed. DC Comics, 1996

Dixon, Chuck, writer. McDaniel, Scott, illustrator The Visitor. Nightwing. 06, e-book ed. DC Comics, 1996

Dixon, Chuck, writer. McDaniel, Scott, illustrator. False Starts. Nightwing. 21, e-book ed. DC Comics, 1998

Dixon, Chuck, writer. McDaniel, Scott, illustrator. The Forgotten Dead. Nightwing. 24, e-book ed. DC Comics, 1998.

Dixon, Chuck, writer. McCarthy, Trevor, illustrator. The Threshold. Nightwing. 60, e-book ed. DC Comics, 2001

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Grayson, Devin, writer. Eaglesham, Dale, illustrator. Fear of Flames Part One: Fanning the Flames. Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight. 116, e-book ed. DC Comics, 1999.

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Grayson, Devin, writer. Zircher, Patch, illustrator. Rekindle. Nightwing no 91, e-book ed. DC Comics, 2004

Grayson, Devin, writer. Garcia, Manuel, illustrator Flashpoint. Nightwing no 92, e-book ed. DC Comics, 2004

Grayson, Devin, writer. Zircher, Patch, illustrator. Slow Burn. Nightwing no 93, e-book ed. DC Comics, 2004

Grayson, Devin, writer. Hester, Phil, illustrator. Cold Turkey. Nightwing. 109, e-book ed. DC Comics, 2005.

Grayson, Devin, writer. Chiang, Cliff, illustrator. Signed, Sophia. Nightwing. 111, e-book ed. DC Comics, 2005

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Humphries, Sam, writer. Chang, Bernard, illustrator The Untouchable: Chapter One: Hunter. Nightwing: Rebirth no. 35, e-book ed. DC Comics, 2018

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Humphries, Sam, writer. Chang, Bernard, illustrator. The Untouchable: Chapter Six: Deep Dive. Nightwing: Rebirth no. 40, e-book  ed. DC Comics, 2018.

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[hakkaitsm]

Ryomen Sukuna (Heian/Original form) x oc blind male

"Illness"

Warning: angst, maybe a slightly ooc Sukuna depending on the point of view, possible "mild" necrophilia

Not reviewed

︶⏝ ֹ ࣭ ⊹ ❒ ♡ ִ ֹ ⏝︶

A thousand years ago, an age ancient and much more cursed than any other time before. An era destroyed and dominated by curses, specifically with the reign and tyranny of Ryomen Sukuna, a huge man with four red eyes, black tattoos all over his body, two faces and two mouths, a true cruel aberration feared in every corner of Japan.

He killed everything that challenged him in any way, whether children, the elderly, women or men. He was extremely brutal, always killing his victims in the most cruel and callous way possible, tearing their flesh and skin forcefully with his hands and his divine weapons.

◤━━━━━ ☆. ☪ .☆ ━━━━━◥

The sunlight was present in the small village, waking up every room except one in specific. A young, 20-year-old boy, his eyes are white and his body is weak as porcelain due to the disease that has taken over his entire body, being completely unknown to any doctor who has investigated him. He stood up weakly listening to the birds singing and smiled despite the misfortune of not being able to see the colors of the world like everyone else around him. Stepping out of his house carefully, he felt the breeze of the morning wind touching his face affectionately, the conversations of the people around the village guiding him as he walked forward looking for a quieter place to spend time.

He stopped when he felt he was on a small hill that he had never come across on his walks, sitting on the green grass that he couldn't see just feel, he felt free feeling his short, dark brown hair sway. Unfortunately, he had no idea that he was so close to the danger that lurked in the forest alongside his sick person.

"What do you think you're doing here?"

A deep and rigid voice was present behind the young man who was startled by this, how could he not have felt the presence of that man? He always felt when someone was close, it was his defense mechanism in the face of total blindness. His face turned away on impulse as all he saw was absolutely nothing no matter what he did.

"just.... enjoying the wind"

He responded a little reluctantly as he didn't know the man's intentions or what he looked like. The man's frown softened a little when he saw the boy's blindness, but he still remained cold and rude.

"Try to be careful not to enter the forest next door"

He said simply, his voice as cold as it always was. The blind man's presence didn't bother him, but he didn't like it either. He liked to have peace in his own temple, which was close to where the blind man was now and the humans did not respect his peace, constantly invading his home in an attempt to kill him and this always ended in the humans simply never returning.

The boy hadn't understood why he couldn't go to the forest, but he decided to just nod and then the heavy and uncomfortable presence of that man began to slowly disappear, leaving him alone with his own confused thoughts.

◤━━━━━ ☆. ☪ .☆ ━━━━━◥

It was another ordinary and simple day in his life of complete agonizing darkness, he walked again aimlessly trying to find a new path to explore and didn't notice when he started walking in a place with grass, listening to the subtle swaying of the leaves and only then did he he realized he was in the forest but it was a little too late to turn back.

"Which part of 'don't go into the forest' don't you understand? Are you deaf as well as blind?"

The insensitivity in the voice of the man behind the boy hurt him, his chest hurting a little with the phrase about his birth blindness that bothers him so much.

"I...I couldn't figure out where I was going"

He didn't seem to really resent the man and smiled softly with his head lowered, which surprised the tyrant a little. He was supposed to kill that miserable human, but he himself was already living a pitiful existence and so he simply snorted in annoyance rolling his double eyes. Sukuna turned around, deciding to leave for his temple, leaving the blind man to fend for himself in the dark forest surrounded by unpredictable danger.

◤━━━━━ ☆. ☪ .☆ ━━━━━◥

As time passed, some coincidences meant that the two met regularly. At first it was annoying for the cursed man to have to constantly see that innocent and stupid face characterized by the white of his pupils but then he got used to the blind man's presence and strangely... He liked having the presence of someone like this simple villager surrounding him.

"I forgot to ask, what's your name, brat?"

The question caught the young man off guard given the silence that was there, he was next to the cruel man at his side because somehow the man made him calm and looser.

"My name is Karumi, I didn't remember to say my name during that time"

He responded by smiling and laughing softly and it made Sukuna's stomach bubble, but it wasn't hunger or anything like that it was something more like... butterflies? No, he hadn't eaten any butterflies as far as he could remember, but then the penny seemed to drop and he shook his head, letting out a deep growl at these damned feelings that began to flow. Perhaps it was time to finally put an end to this obstacle in his life and he was quick to extend his hand to wrap it around the weak human's neck but the white gaze turning towards him paralyzed him in the process.

"did something happen wrong, sir?"

The young man's question and the innocent look on his face, pure of some evil, made the tyrant quickly restrain himself, retracting his hand and arm, grinding his teeth and frowning at this demonstration of his own weakness and vulnerability.

" nothing else"

It was cold and dry, much more than he normally sounded, leaving the blind man a little reluctant, dropping the subject right away. The monster began to rethink a little looking at the purity of the sky reflecting the beauty of the eyes of the weak creature next to him, why had he become attached to this insignificant being? What was so different from other people he had even the slightest interest in in the past? Was his situation regrettable? Your purity? Your innocence? Your calm presence?

No matter how much he reflected, nothing worked to answer his countless questions. Sighing heavily he turned to the young man next to him feeling slightly bad for having been rude to Karumi, the villager didn't deserve this.

"boy, how do you imagine me? It's a persistent doubt"

Perhaps he was taking too much of a risk by uttering such a question, especially because he was not a good sight to look at, imagine if he was imagined in the mind of someone unable to see the truth, it would probably make his appearance even more hideous and distorted. And then he froze in place as he felt the gentle and soft hand touching his totally deformed and incompressible second face, the hardness and roughness of his second face seemed not to bother the blind man who had his lips parted in unexpected admiration, seeming to really enjoy touching it- it. His hand itched not to propel himself through the villager because of his murderous tendencies ingrained in his bones.

"I can't say... it's a little exotic... but I don't exactly dislike it. I'm sorry, it's very difficult to say clearly"

The answer surprised him, he would have imagined a comment of disgust or something, but he received a subtle compliment, wasn't his appearance unpleasant? Maybe it was because he was blind and couldn't be sure what he felt, but still the compliment had an effect on the King leaving him agitated and confused about his own feelings again. When Karumi moved his hand away, Sukuna held back immensely not to pull back, hug and have the young man all to himself, he would have to control himself if he really planned to win the trust and love of the kind blind man.

◤━━━━━ ☆. ☪ .☆ ━━━━━◥

With time everything seems so much more natural and spontaneous between them, Sukuna stopped denying all that strange feeling of love that bothered him so much, now it was what filled his being that was previously empty of any source of heat. But to say that everything was perfect would be hyperbole, Karumi's illness was getting worse with each passing day and even though he tried to hide it behind those pure eyes and gentle smile, deep down he knew that the tyrant had noticed his decline. Sukuna worried enough about that mere human to send his servants on dangerous missions in search of a cure for his medically unknown disease, just as he did with his murderous ways, hiding from his partner all the deaths and pain he still caused while He promised himself to protect Karumi's home, well he just didn't know that the young man was aware of all this but he seemed to prefer to look at the more "human" side that Sukuna showed to his sick self.

Every day it seemed that the pain increased drastically, leaving him in bed on a comfortable futon inside a room just for him in the sacred temple of the King who constantly visited him, holding his hand and remaining silent, comforting him with his presence surprisingly light and with the gentle touch of his large, calloused hand to demonstrate silent support. And no matter how much he lied to himself, he had fallen in love with the tyrant a long time ago, but he didn't want the man to be trapped by his being condemned and so he didn't say anything about it.

Time passed quickly and Sukuna became increasingly frustrated with the constant failure to find a cure for the villager and he took it all out on his servants and innocent people from other nearby villages, an endless massacre in the face of each routine frustration. Unexpectedly Karumi had a sudden improvement that created a slight hope in the King, someone as cruel as him shouldn't be so naive, but love left him weak emotionally and mentally to that point.

"Sir! Something is wrong, Karumi started coughing up a lot of blood!"

He doesn't remember running as much as he does now, even though his weight seemed like a hindrance along with his enormous size, he was still agile and fast enough to reach the room in seconds, seeing Uraume and other servants trying to help a sick boy soaked in his own blood dripping. through thin lips, his face contorted in pain from the blood expelled from his body so forcefully.

The King was quick to wrap him in his arms using all the reverse cursed energy he could muster in a desperate attempt to make it work. Karumi's unstoppable cough, dirtying his body, distressed him, he had never felt the agony of blood, on the contrary, he loved seeing the blood of his victims gushing out and staining everything they could, but seeing that blood haunted him as much as anything else. The boy's eyes seemed to slowly close and this was a trigger of despair for the cursed man.

"Hey! Hey! What the hell are you doing?! Don't you dare close your eyes! That's an order, obey me or I swear...I swear..."

He stopped in the middle of the sentence feeling the strong hammering in his heart, his eyes trembling and his hands firmly gripping Karumi's shoulders as if he would escape from his hands like sand at any moment.

The poor boy couldn't move properly, the unbearable pain was slowly disappearing and to his surprise the colors became a last sight for his eyes, it's beautiful, but more than he could imagine since he was born. He extended his weakened and trembling hand to Sukuna's second deformed face, finding it beautiful how he looked so unique and different among everyone he could now see from the corner of his eye, a smile appeared on his face at such a sight that at her eyes that were so calloused were beautiful.

"you are more beautiful than I could imagine...."

This froze the tyrant, he wasn't expecting that, of course he wasn't. No one in his entire life as a cruel monster, unwanted child, freak, natural disaster and fallen angel had looked at him as something beautiful to look at. His breathing hitched when he felt the heat of Karumi's hand disappearing from his face and when he noticed with his ears the absence of a beating heart.

All he could do was stare in shock, his thumb gently stroking the young man's cheek as the penny still seemed to sink in for him. And then he felt hot liquid suddenly pouring down from his eyes, what the hell was that? Why was water coming out of his eyes? Why did his chest hurt so much?

Silence fell in the room, his servants left, leaving him alone with the soft corpse of the porcelain boy. He felt stupid for not caring about his sudden improvement and for not making an effort to make everything work out, they hadn't even kissed or anything because he was actually respecting Karumi's space assuming that the boy didn't think so minimally interesting for a relationship.

He knew what he was doing was wrong, but since when were his morals correct? He hugged the boy's empty body and kissed him even though he knew he would never feel the love he was transmitting through that simple kiss surrounded by an incurable pain marking his soul forever and ever, his arms firmly refused to let go of the corpse as he he separated himself from his lips, burying his head in the crook of Karumi's neck, wanting to feel his touch again because even though it was still warm, it would soon become something cold, reflecting the absence of a soul there.

He didn't utter a single word, not even at the funeral of the only person he truly cared about. He just stood there in the heavy rain as he looked at the earth, covering his body buried in the hole along with a tombstone with the kimono the boy wore above. There were hours and hours of pure silence filled only by the rain shower and his conflicting thoughts wondering if there was anything else he could have done for the blind villager.

And the days passed even more slowly now, he returned to his slaughter with a helpless attitude of forgetting everything when it had happened no matter how deeply his heart ached every day and it took a while for him to finally have the courage to check his village to see how everyone They were missing the young man since most knew about their relationship. Not only did he not expect what he would end up hearing:

"Did you see that blind boy lost to illness?"

"Yes, they told me that... It wasn't unexpected because he was really very sick, but he had 3 more years to live according to the doctors, it's strange"

"Hey, didn't you know? The Wizards seemed uncomfortable with their relationship and decided to kill the boy with a poisoned apple because of his innocence and blindness"

His face immediately scrunched up and his teeth ground together, his hands clenched into strong, firm fists in pure rage. What the fuck did he hear? These damned sorcerers still continue to bother and have gone too far like the hypocrites they always were. This whole time, in fact, Karumi was murdered and should live longer than he did, his breathing became heavy and he lost control of his body, taken by the purest hatred, starting to destroy everyone in the village without mercy, the sound of screams and tearing flesh was what surrounded the burning landscape and bathed in innocent blood

The pain in his chest was as if the tearing and burning of his heart was taking place and he bathed for years in blood amid his wrath that all of Japan could feel, he felt bitter, guilty, angry, confused and more. a whirlwind of emotions that filled him. He was not able to understand at that time why he felt weak despite defeating the countless sorcerers who challenged him, he felt insufficient and incapable in the face of the whole situation and condemned love for its weakness.

◤━━━━━ ☆. ☪ .☆ ━━━━━◥

"after understanding"

"I can say"

"things like love are useless""

His current self got tired of all the pain he was forced to endure again for being reborn in the modern era thanks to that stupid brat who swallowed his finger in the midst of the despair of near death. And he cursed Yuji, cursed as he was cursed by the love of that pure soul that he would never forget and that gave him the taste of the purest weakness he could experience.

Maybe Yuji didn't understand why Sukuna hated him but it was something obvious that the tyrant would never admit out loud, the way the pinkette was optimistic in the past made him remember those white eyes that saw some trace of beauty and kindness in his being. distorted and he hated how bitter the memory was. And that's why he made a point of breaking Yuji to the extreme to destroy his optimism and gentle radiance, the teenage wizard didn't deserve to have such traits, he didn't deserve to be happy in his distorted vision, he would make each one feel twice as much pain.

And finally he understood that it was fair, the boy's body, weakened and pure as the most crystal clear water in the world, did not belong to this world and the Gods only did the favor of seeking that soul earlier. He still hated them like he hated Wizards, but in the end he was forced to have this punishment, that boy was nothing more than a punishment and his curse .

︶⏝ ֹ ࣭ ⊹ ❒ ♡ ִ ֹ ⏝︶

[popculturebuffet]

Through A Mirror Darkly: Life, The Negaverse and Everything (Patreon Review for WeirdKev27)

Hello all you happy people and it's time for a hop back through the mirror as we continue Through a Mirror Darkly, a look at mirror universe episodes.

Today we go back to something we haven't revisited in a while on this blog: the terror who flaps in the night, the finely aged cheese you left on the sidewalk in the rain Darkwiinnnnggg duuuuucckkk.

Yes the darkwing of the night is back on this blog as we see just where his arch enemy came from. Negaduck's an intresting case as unlike most darkwing foes, who were either introduced alongside their origin stories or were only introduced after them because the episode after that was finished and Disney coudln't wait five minutes, he was introduced in the just us ducks two parter we've coverd here before as someone Darkwing knew.. but the audience didn't.

It also worked. Out of nowhere was this mysterious dark reflection of our hero: while both ducks were hammy, Negaduck was a colder kind, with a sneering voice that just made it clear how much contempt he had for everyone around him, and a penchant for chainsaws. Darkwing could get dangerous... Negaduck was ALWAYS dangerous.

This episode answers who the heck is this guy.. withotu ruining his mystique. Fittingly, like darkwing we don't know WHY Negaduck became a supervillian, but we do know why an evil doppleganger of darkwing suddenly manifested and wasn't the previous negative counterpart we'd seen before.

Naturally given what this series is about, he's from an evil parallel universe; one without hope, where Negaduck rules supreme and where Drake naturally ends up, out of his element, out of fucks to give, and with a world against him. Can drake survivie this world turned up side down? can be be convinced to do the right thing and help this fallen world? Will the muddlefoots wear leather for some reason? find out under the cut

We open with the fearsome five, who just came back from a succesful heist and are hangin out. Down the street. Same old place. They did Last week. Negaduck does however have a thing to do than talk to you so he tries to duck out but the rest of the gang wants to know why he never hangs. Is it them?

The short answer, yes the long answer is negaduck has other things to do at his hideout and dosen't want to share it. So the others decide to do the rational thing and let him go be a dick elsewhere and.. nope they decide to follow him. Granted if they did the rational thing they probably woudln't be fighting darkwing every week so fair play.

At the Drake Residence, Drake is engaged in a long afternoon's nap that Gosalyn rudely interupts. Drake's supposed to take her next door for Honker's birthday party. Drake politley declines

Okay maybe not politley but in his defense: the muddlefoots life next door, so Gosalyn REALLY dosen't need an escort. He can see fine from here, and he talks about how much he hates the muddlefoots on a regular basis. She knows he dosen't like Honker's parents or brother, he hasn't been shy about that, why force him to go beyond "If I have to tolerate them so do you daddddd". Launchpad can't do it because he's picking up the cake.

So Drake is forced to endure this party. Granted Gos isn't much happier as Honker is happy just reading. We haven't really talked about the muddlefoots a lot in previous darkwing reviews as Honker tends to appear solo a lot and the only real time his family was important was during the Splatter Phoenix episode, which was less about the usual dynamic with them and more about Herb being a value pack of dicks.

The Muddlefoots are the Mallard's next door neighbors and the bains of his existance, to the point you think Drake only didn't have a civlian identity for so long to avoid talking to people like them. Their the annoying people in your lives you can't get rid of and you have TRIE.

The Muddlefoots consit of herb, the overenthuastic dad, his doting and mildly annoying wife binky, thier withdrawn and nerdy son and gosalyn's best friend honker and Honker's older brother and waking nightmare tank, who is a bully to one and all including Drake.

The muddlefoots primarily annoy the tar out of drake because they have no real self awarness, the most ironic of hells, and thus Herb just kinda wedges himself into Drake's life despite Drake never being subtle about hating the muddlefoots. Herb isn't a BAD guy.. he's just very awkard... similar to how Drake's not the worst person, simply incrdibly cranky and egotistical.

Drake luckily gets an escape when Launchpad arrives.. and when he was getting the cake spotted the fearsome four, if not negaduck whose hideout the cake shop is. Drake takes the easy out both for justice and to get to trip tank into the cake as an excuse to go get a replacement.

Darkwing arrives.. but the numbers game means he easily looses and the four easily capture him. Inside Negaduck has opened some kinda weird stygian hole in his cake and the villians throw him in.. and piss negsy off.

Turns out the portal is his way HOME. It also spotlights something that makes negaduck so dangerous: it isn't just that he's cruel or ax crazy... it's that he's SMART. Unlike Drake whose clever but is also up his own ass, Negaduck thinks his plans through, and thus knows unleashing darkwing on a world without compitent heroes threatens his reign and goes after him.

Drake ends up in the negaverse but has no idea "what happened to his beautiful st canard". I also love the payoff to that when Negaduck sniffs in the heavy polution and whistfully proclaims "my beautiful st canard". I also like how while having a red skied industrial dystipia is normal to show a mirror universe or bad future, here it's also a nice contrast to the dark blues of st canard, which has a more welcoming night skyline , inviting adventure to the opressive nightmare that is the negaverse.

Naturally this being Darkwing.. he has no idea he's in another universe or what the hell's going on for an embarassingly long time. He comes home and assume's it's wrecked condition is "gosalyn mesisng with the wiring" and assumes Negagosalyn is an act. negagosalyn, like ours is a good kid.. unlike ours though she's a sugary sweet girly girl in pigtails and an overly elaborate dress who does what her dad asks.

It's also a nice reminder that not ALL mirror versions of a character have to be evil. Negagos is simply the oppisite of our gos, a girly girl to regular gos' tomboy. It's weird to see.

Even weirder is NegaLaunchpad... which I didn't evne know was going to be a thing going into this episode before Is aw some fanart when I looked up the negaverse. He's just.. not really takled about. The design is good: a slovenly post apocalypstic biker with a rat tail, the true sign of evil. Admitley I did'nt know that biker micheal liker is the opposite of pilot but it makes sense: Launchpad is classsicly heroic, so his oppisite would be modernly grungy.

Darkwing still hasn't got that maybe this isn't HIS st canard, and watches the telly with his bizzaro family... only to find out he's now public enemy #1 as Negaduck simply went to the tv station when he coudln't find darkwing and put out a bulletin. It's a clever twist too: instead of "the hero is mistaken for their counterpart while the evil version is on earth plotting" as tends to be standard, the villian just takes away the one advantage the hero has.

So Darkwing and NegaGosalyn dart away from Launchapd and his rocket launcher. Negagos... is elated to find out Darkwing exists, her negadad having told her about him, and to hav ehope.

Darkwing FINALLY gets an explination from of all people, Negatank. Here he's a politely spoken child genius, much like his positive counterpart's brother. He also gives out a heap of expositoin but given how stubborn darkwing is, he kinda NEEDS it , and the show's reality is goofy enough for this to work. Darkwing still dosen't FULLY buy it.. till he meets the muddlefoots.

YEah i'm all for leather and chains, but I did.. not want to see that on the muddlefoots and will take the neede dpercautions at seeing this

Ahhhh much better. Anyways the biker muddlelikers mistake Darkwing for his evil doppleganger, but Negahonker ruins the party and thus theyg rill darkwing.. literally. he almost dies and after commerical has been rescued along with Gos offscreen by the Friendly Four

Who Sought out Darkwing.. because if Negaduck's after him he MIGHT be able to finally stop him, as they havne't.

Darkwing is a darkwing dick and refuses to help. It's a harsh reminder to me that this darkwing.. isn't really all that heroic a lot of the time, willing to leave a bunch of people who BADLY need a hero behind simply because "can't make me don't wanna".

Thankfully we pivot from Darkwing at one of his lowest points.. to a reminder of the good person that lies beneath. Negagos.. is entirely happy to let him go, knowing his Gosalyn needs him and sees him off... and with that.. the wheels turn in his head.

He asks a question he likely knows the answer to... Who is Gosalyn's Guardian? The answer? Negaduck.

"Oh. In the Negaverse, there's never been a Darkwing Duck to guard the city... (gulp) Or a Drake Mallard to be a father. For you, Gosalyn, I'll stay."

The delivery here is amazing: Drake's voice cracks as he realizes just what hell this poor girl's gone thorugh and no matter the universe... Gosalyn is his daughter. He may be willing to abandon these people.. but he can never abandon HER. His Gosalyn has Launchpad... Negagos has no one... and he's not going to let that stand if he can help it. If this world needs heroes, if it needs to be better... then he'll MAKE it better. For her. For his daughter.

It's a truly brilliant scene, it's simple.. but the performance and just how repugntant darkwing was being seconds before really sell it: he'd leave this world behind because it's not his... but the second he realizes one of the few people in the world he cares about will be left in this hellhole.. he realizes he was wrong. It may not be his world.. but it's his responsiblity.

He sets to work traning the friendly four, giving them all his knowledge and skills, a crash course in being darkwing duck. And what also makes this work so well is like Gosalyn.. the change isn't too extreme. We've seen from the BOOM/Joe Books comics that these guys CAN at least try to change, and bushroot isn't that evil to begin with. Given the chance or the want to change.. they might have.

They simply havent which is a pity as we see here when breaking good.. their GREAT at being heroes. better than they ever were with villians. They fix a broken and toxic st canard easily, with liquidator's power clearing out the water and bushroot restoring the land. It shows just what these guys COULD be capable of, the good they could do.. if they only cared enough to do it.

They still get captured of course, though luckily a dangerous toy Negajack made frees darkwing and the Friendly Four, now all darkwinged up in proper costumes, easily clean house on the Negafoots, as Negaduck prepares to flee this dimension, deciding if he can't have it then he can just go back.

This leads to another touching moment: Darkwing.. isn't prepared to leave, as Negagos needs him.. but as before she encourages him. HIs Gosalyn needs him.. and she's not alone before. By simply staying behind, putting in the effort and helping this world.. Darkwing gave her four dads, a better world and a hope at a future. Darkwing may be egotistical, selfish and well.. a reall dick of a duck.. but it's moments like this that show beneath it all when pressed.. he will do the right thing and CAN make the world better.

We get a cool final set piece as Darkwing duels with Negaduck in the space between spaces.. and wins entirely by pulling the plug on the cosmic drain, leaving Negaduck to oblivion and Drake home.

So Drake comes home and gives Gosalyn a big hug, which she declares is a bit mushy.. but it shows that as much as they snipe at each other... he loves his daughter and is happy to be back wit hher. He also admits he "loves the muddlefoots' they may be terrible.. but at least their not trying to kill him.

Life the Negaverse and Everything is an excellent episode. While admitely the evil versions of everyone are mostly just evil, same with the good, it works better here than brave and the bold as while we still get an emotoinal moment and negagos is fun to have around, Darkwing Duck takes itself less seriously and thus the broader more sterotypical post apocalypse take on an earth 3 world works, while still giving us said emotoinal moments and nice bits of what ifs: we see what the fearsome four would be as heroes, where negaduck comes from and why as while i'ts not said it's clear he just wanted more world's to conquer and is'nt the weeping sort, and has some fun gags. It's one of the shows best episodes i've seen and I highly recommend it

Next Time: The Kids Next Door deal with the worst kind of pool party> We also FINALLY get the evil spock beard on someone. Horay!

[waugh-bao]

So I’ve been thinking more about the asks I was sent about Keith on this tour and what the change up in concert structure (one solo song by Keith instead of two) portends for the band and the long term reception of this tour.

I’ve said it before, but I have to repeat, with even more emphasis, that I’m almost blown away by how much criticism there is of the musical quality of this tour 2 shows in. Especially after Keith has started sitting to play some of the songs.

There’s still people, generally Boomers, hitting back, but it’s never a real defense of their musical integrity or ability, just an appeal to age:

(Also the ‘they don’t need the money’ take is kind of stupid because UK death tax is a bitch and any of their British assets that aren’t tied up in the band’s Swiss based corporation are going to vanish by almost half when they’re split. Not to mention two of them have a ton of kids that it will probably need to be divided amongst. And Mick has always been money hungry).

And the rest of the comments look a lot more like this:

I was especially struck by the person who termed it ‘grading on a nostalgia curve’, because I think that’s a spot on description for the typical defense, whether it’s coming from Boomers who spent $800 on a ticket or not:

You may see it panned by individual critics or newspapers, I sincerely doubt any big music writers or magazines will be that harsh towards the tour because the Stones sell and they want access to the band more than integrity. It’s the same reason Hackney Diamonds got such glowing reviews. All the Stones’ albums since Steel Wheels get amazing mainstream reviews and then 5-10 years later everyone goes back and admits they weren’t that good/outright suck. By the same vein, I think once the band is genuinely over and a few years have passed, the consensus will shift to ‘they would have had a lot more integrity and dignity if they called it quits after No Filter, because everything that followed was the band rapidly becoming a parody of itself.’

And I do think the end is coming sooner rather than later. Tour insurance only becomes harder to secure with time (Mick would never take the risk of financially wiping himself out that personally guaranteeing a tour would run and most venues wouldn’t want to deal with liability that anyway) and they know it’s only getting worse musically whether or not they’ll ever own up to it. Embarrassment will win over eventually if physicals don’t. I tentatively doubt they’ll ever officially announce a last tour, because they have a longstanding aversion to the kind of pity involved in that, but I don’t seriously believe we’ll see more than one more European tour and maybe a final US/North America one.

I’ll close on the less depressing note of the unintentionally funniest (dark) comment/reply I’ve seen in a while:

[melloggd]

Review: Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney

Capcom • Capcom • 2007 • Nintendo DS Read it on Backloggd: (x)

So, here we are. Having written my Dual Destinies review (one of my favorites I've written, still) and almost being finished with Spirit of Justice, I feel its about time I toss my hat into the ring regarding AA4, possibly the most discussed Ace Attorney game of them all. There's a lot to unpack with AA4, and a lot of different ways to unpack it.

After AA1/2/3 wrapped up as a pretty much perfect, concluded trilogy, the 4th game had to be one to really break some sort of new ground, to not just seem as if the franchise was being stretched thin. And to outsiders looking in, be assured: They did far more than just give us a new protagonist. You meet Phoenix only to find out that he's completely changed, the perception of what makes a good defense lawyer has changed, your relation to the prosecution has changed, the story being told and, indeed, the very world of the game has shifted wholly. Its a remarkably ambitious game: One that, rather than just telling another story of a new character's growth like the old trilogy did, chose to readjust the lens of the series to focus far more on the law world at large, whilst subverting player expectations along the way.

I'll drop the dramatics and be blunt: In terms of ambition, ideas and themes, AA4 ranks as possibly my favorite game in the series. But as the finished game we got, I consider it the least enjoyable game in the series I've played.

Yet I can't even be sure if that's a bad thing. Because with so many of the issues I take with the game, there's a fascinating viewpoint that changes it into an interesting positive that also fits right in with the game's general direction of…well, misdirection, and subversion. Simply put, its an artsy game. For example, I noted halfway through my playthrough that the game's repertoire of characters are all mostly annoying, mean, or hard to work with, which leads to me as a player feeling miffed. Yet at the same time, Apollo is living in a new age of distrust and darkness in the legal world. He's living in an age where few feel like they can trust in others anymore, because people like Kristoph who desire results far above truth or fairness rule the justice system: The idea of "evidence" is so easily manipulated, that anyone can escape justice. Thus, Apollo's unable to have his perfect storybook journey of growth and support like Phoenix had because the world around him has changed to be hostile. So, is it really right of me to complain about the game doing what it sets out to do exceptionally well?

On the topic of Apollo himself, its very interesting that he himself is such a passive and static figure throughout most of the game, which underwhelmed me at first. But like I said: This isn't a character-driven story like the Trilogy, so is Apollo's lack of focus a BAD thing? Is the game trying to subvert what came before, rather than running with the tried-and-true optimistic hero's journey, a bad thing? Its a lot of these dilemmas I run into when thinking about the game, and its the reason why I respect it so highly despite the actual process of playing it being a lot more middling than the rest of the series in my eyes.

With all that being said, for as much intent as the game may otherwise have, it IS still Ace Attorney and comes with all the pros and cons of that. The animation is gorgeous, music is stellar, most of the overall mysteries are still pretty fun to unravel, and the whole gameplay of untangling testimonies is as fun as ever. The great fundamentals are still here and keep it enjoyable to play to a degree, and you can even sort of tell a new director is at the helm with this project.

Mitsuru Endo, previously a game designer first and foremost on games like Breath of Fire and Sengoku Basara, really rubs off his love for new gameplay systems and quirks in this game. Like usual for the series though, these systems end up being a mixed bag. Investigating evidence can be pretty fun and is a natural fit for the series, and Percieving is a cool and distinct power, iconic to Apollo. Yet then you have stuff like Ema's Forensics minigames, which feel really out of place and are uninteresting to engage with. There's no puzzle to them, just a good ol' DS touchscreen game. You get the feeling a lot of these things, and the systems exclusive to the third and fourth case, were added as a novelty, as fun toys for the player to engage with rather than being anything substantial…yet at the same time, as a game themed around magic tricks, isn't that heightened interactivity also part of the point?

In terms of writing and general direction, the main thing I think Takumi's games (those being the Ace Attorney Trilogy and The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles) are worse at than his peers' is linking cases together to form a cohesive whole. Takumi excels in writing amazing and deviously clever singular cases, but in all his games its as if he can't resist including one or two bonus cases solely for how cool their mysteries are, rather than thinking of how their inclusion will affect the pacing of the game in its totality. Samurai, Big Top, Masked, Recipe, a lot of the individual mysteries in Ghost Trick, Speckled Band, Clouded Kokoro, the first two cases entirely in The Great Ace Attorney 2…don't get me wrong, I think his works are almost universally fantastic, but at times they can feel disjointed to progress through due to his unashamed love of "filler".

Under Endo's directing, meanwhile, it does feel like effort was placed on giving all cases purpose, reigning in Takumi's style of writing just enough to get the best of both worlds. All cases have substantial meaning, yet are able to be as zany and clever as Takumi always loves to write them. Beyond being a crazy case of solving several crimes at once, 4-2 serves to highlight how much Phoenix has changed and how Trucy helps him. 4-3 features a murder that takes place during a series of live stage performances, asking you to rewatch its footage to catch specific details related to witness testimony. At the same time, it also has a great focus on Klavier as a character, and the corrupt police-force that's been able to thrive in this new age, asking questions on if the law is always just in what it stands for. Yet that being said, we run back to the original issue of fun: Despite its cool themes and depth, 4-3 remains the worst case in any Ace Attorney game to actually play, both because of poor gameplay pacing, but also because the writing doesn't feel fleshed out enough to properly convey its brilliant ideas.

The lack of Psyche-Lockes as well honestly destroys the fun of investigating, and the pacing across all three cases featuring investigations is honestly dreadful. The only substitute present for the lack of Psyche-Lockes is the aforementioned mind-numbing forensics minigames, which do little to help things. Now, I noted in my Dual Destinies review that that game also had underwhelming gameplay, but it to me was salvaged by still having a rock solid, well-paced story pace where things were always happening. The game lacks Psyche-Lockes (for most of it) as well but makes up for it with a steadier stream of discoveries, more interesting 3D crime scene investigations, and so on. Due to AA4s insistence on finding meaning in the mundane, it ends up far less fun to play.

So, its a really tough call. I don't think AA5 or 6 are as ambitious or nuanced in what they want to convey as AA4, yet but they make up for it by having more engaging story events and better pacing across the board, leading to a more enjoyable experience for me. They're stories that are told in a tighter and more fun way than AA4, yet it feels wrong to label the game as "the worst Ace Attorney!!" because, again, it tries so hard and has such a unique flair as by far the most artistic game in the series.

Had this been the final Ace Attorney as originally intended, it would've been an impactful note to end on. But I am glad we did get more games in the series, and it led to great things. The murky law world of AA4 begins to heal across the events of AA5, and AA6 gives you an insight into just how badly it could have escalated, emphasizing a theme of preparing the new generation to solve the issues that are inevitably going to occur through the old generation's stubbornness and evil. Apollo finally becomes a character with agency and goals, Trucy's relationship to the Gramarye's is given a sweet bookend, we get to see how Edgeworth and Klavier handle the growingly unjust law world, Ema is, there, and Phoenix takes on the mentor role he was destined to do.

What I'm saying is: I'm really happy with how AA4, 5 and 6 turned out as a trilogy, even though it makes AA4's ambition stick out in hindsight, and now just exists as "that one weird game" rather than "the crazy rug-pull finale of the series". Despite my grievances with it, I do still love AA4, and I'm glad its resonated with so many people. But its overambition alongside its stumbles, from pretty shallow gameplay additions to bad pacing, keep me from loving it wholesale and having it click entirely. Simply put, a lot of its "but its like this way on purpose"-isms just don't land with me the way they do in games like Suda51's work. Yet it remains Ace Attorney at its core, and the simple fact that they even tried in a series otherwise aiming for as much mass appeal as this one, is worth so much respect. Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney is forever going to be a standout game in the series, and for me that's both for better and for worse. Basically, I'm just glad it exists, even if its not for me.

[Play Time: 35 Hours] [Key Word: Overzealous]

[marniepreece]

W H O A M I ?

FULL NAME: Marnie Endora Preece OCCUPATION: Owner of Siltshore Mausoleum AGE: 39 PRONOUNS: She/her SPECIES: Witch WITCHCRAFT: Necromancy COVEN: The Garnett Coven HOMETOWN: Wilmington, Delaware RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single SEXUALITY: Queer

(tw: death, necromancy)

P E R S O N A L I T Y

CRYPTIC; Unfortunately Marnie comes from a lineage of wordsmiths. Odds are she's deliberately making a fool of you for asking a stupid question, and she's enjoying the web she's spinning. Blame the lifetime she's spent guarding a wealth of knowledge about a dark art mastered by a select few. DECEPTIVE; As a defence mechanism only. Whether it's to defend against information she doesn't want to divulge, or a more sinister, spiritual attack. She can and will evade the truth to protect those undeserving of harm. Push a little too far, and you'll come to learn that poison is her weapon of choice. EERIE; There's an air of mystery about Marnie that she can't quite shake. It's a little off-putting, really, because her deadpan expression rarely matches the warmth in the inflection of her tone. She reserves her true softness for those that have earned her trust. EMPATHETIC; Feelings first, reasoning second. Her heart yearns to comfort others, particularly when it comes to the spirits that keep her company and those linked closely to them. IMPULSIVE; Watch her talk herself into something reckless in real time. It's not hard, given her people-pleasing disposition. It makes her vulnerable to peer-pressure and/or a persuasive voice at the worst of times. WARM; It doesn't matter how long she's known someone, or whether she knows them at all. She's realised just how few people share the same desire to help others. But she will, always, even if it means receiving nothing in return.

B I O G R A P H Y

June 1984 - Born in Wilmington, Delaware, into a family of two loving parents, both of magical heritage, and a sister. Their small coven of practicing witches had been hidden from human knowledge, following the Preece family lineage and dating back to the 19th century. They were a fragment of part of a much larger coven which resided in Port Leiry. September 1991 - Her youngest brother was born. June 1994 - On her 10th birthday, Marnie was given her first spell book titled 'Conversations with the Dead'. Each following birthday she received literature to guide her towards reanimating and speaking with the dead to ensure she carried on the practice of necromancy. October 1999 - Marnie spoke to the dead for the first time at age 15, and it was crucial that she succeeded. The long-buried Matriarch of the coven (in Delaware) gave Marnie their approval, and a glowing review of her sinister talents, after she had reanimated her and forced the truth from splinters in her bones. February 2001 - Her familiar made themself known to her; an orange baboon tarantula known for possessing a toxin of unknown lethality, never before extracted by human hand. January 2005 - Word travelled between nomads and covens about Marnie and her familiar. An odd request to study the toxins produced by her familiar had her migrating, for what she assumed would be a temporary stay, across the belt of the country and settling in Colorado. She fell in love with mountains, lakes, and long open roads before she fell in love with a girl. One that learned just how defensive her familiar could be, and was the first to feel the full effects of its bite. August 2010 to May 2021 - After heartbreak and heartache, she travelled through the midwest and vowed never to stay in one place for more than a few years at a time. She gravitated towards witches by circumstance, since spirits were terrible at keeping secrets, and found she was subconsciously travelling towards Port Leiry. On her travels, she fell into allied covens as a guest, aiding them in their understanding of dark magic and demonstrating her own magical prowess. And just as they thought Marnie was settled with them, she would leave without a word and continue on towards Port Leiry. May 2021 - She arrived in Port Leiry, where the spirits of the Mausoleum courted her to stay with stories of their ancestors, romances, and lives once lived. She promptly became the owner, and spent most of her free time exchanging information about the town's happenings, her travels, and uncovering the town's history from first-hand accounts.

W A N T E D

I've walked with you once upon a dream - Members of The Garnett Coven from all walks of life that she's likely heard rumours of, or met in her travels. In a different time, a different place, we could've been - Romance that ended amicably, tragically, or just ended. Odds are they've left an impression on her that has become a vital part of her personality, for better or worse. This love is alive back from the dead - Any and all wanting to reconnect with someone 'passed on'. If they're buried in Port Leiry, she might just be able to bring them back. For a price. A vision trick under the warning light - She doesn't like to deceive others if she can avoid it, but odds are she's lied to a handful of people about something she shouldn't have. What she's lied about, how important it is to your character, and to whom, is up to you. Got all kinds of poison in my blood - Those interested in studying the effects of her familiar's poison, or using it for their own benefit. You were a memory that I could never leave - Her siblings; an older sister (40s) and younger brother (33). Marnie was 22 when she left home and promised she wouldn't be gone long. How they feel about reconnecting with her is up to you.

[c7thetumbler]

Quick Game reviews: 2023 (Part 1!)

Hey everyone! Apologies for the screenshots stolen from google; at the point I compiled most of this I deleted my Xitter account and didn't have the screenshots I typically share from there.

Additionally, since Tumblr has a 30 image limit this is going to be split into 2 parts! How exciting.

Let's get it goin

This group of 8 games were beat in the first week of 2023! Do not set such goals; games are made to be fun on your own time and turning it into a job is a lot like seeing how the sausage is made. But I digress;

Tinykin (Steam)

A very fun 3D puzzle-platformer collectathon. It has many pikmin-like elements in that you control a bunch of little guys to carry, push, or interact with various objects in fun ways, but I would hesitate to call it a full Pikmin like game because they really serve as collectibles which when you have enough of let you access certain areas. There's really not strategy element to it. But, it's still a fun 3D platformer, and I recommend it

Super Kiwi 64 (Steam)

This is a weird one. Another 3D platformer that will last you at most 1 hour, Super Kiwi 64 is an unsettling but intriguing little experience where you navigate a number of levels with challenges and items to collect. I say unsettling because the music has a very mysterious vibe, and the environments go from the bright forest above to some almost liminal, dark areas devoid of interactable characters and littered with strange skeletons and glyphs. It was interesting; I would say pick it up on sale if you're looking for a chill hour of playtime, but it's also only $3, so you do you

Toree 2 (Steam)

Another retro 3D platformer that's more like the PS1 era, Toree 2 is focused on quick, optimizable movements and levels design to be speedrun and 100%'d. This one is also only an hour, but also only a buck to play! Keeping with the unsettling theme, it's levels are nostalgic and bright, but the main antagonist seems to be drawing on some glitchy, bizarre power that causes some strange effects to happen in levels. It's a small but fun nostalgic experience that it's difficult and a well done series of levels

Toree 3D (Steam)

Same review as above, the sequel! Sure, the 3D may lead you to believe it's different mechanically, but it was already 3D so it's really just more of the same.

Dead Estate: Bombs Away Update (Steam)

This update added a new character, some new enemies, and some alternate rooms. Again, my Dead Estate recommendation is high for those who are into the rogue-like, top down arcade shooters, and this free update was more goodness to complete, though BOSS can very easily be broken with a number of explosion-based items.

Mechanibot (Steam)

Is this auto chess? I don't know what auto chess is as a genre. kids these days

Mechnibot is a top down tower defense like game with rogue-like elements. You start off as mechanibot, a tiny robot who has been tasked to fix the sun and has a number of robots to choose from. Robots act as "towers" that grant certain effects depending on their type and description, and can even have multiple types and effects. Your job is to keep these robots alive and attacking by frantically running around and placing them in and out of danger. You get money for each wave, which can be spent on given options at the end of each wave to upgrade robots, get new ones, and some upgrades for yourself as well. It's a lot of fun, a good 8 hours of content and replayable. Try out the demo and see if it's for you

Minit Fun Racer (Steam)

Another short game! This is a spin-off from Minit, and is much more arcade like. You start off on your little bike and have to avoid all the obstacles and collect coins to get to the end. You won't be able to progress very far for a while, so you get upgrade to last longer and get some upgrades for your scooter until you eventually can. Took me about an hour and a half to get all the achievements, but there was surprisingly a lot of cute hidden stuff along the way. Again, a fun arcadey experience with lots of charm for almost nothing.

Chico and the Magic Orchards DX (Steam)

This one was fun! I was on a big GameBoy kick this year, and the DX for this actually came out I was playing it. It was a little aggravating with some of the boss fights, but overall I had a fun time playing it! Recommended for a nice little nostalgic GBC puzzle game, would definitely be best on a portable console.

A Little to the Left (Switch DL)

I wanted to play more simple games, and this one seemed like a lot of fun as a recommendation from a friend. It's a little short, but it speaks to me as someone who hops between obsessing over doing things perfectly and finding it difficult todo anything at all. I especially like the way there are multiple solutions for several puzzles, which when compared with another player let you understand the different ways people can "organize" the same thing. A casual puzzle game that's worth a try, though don't expect hours and hours of entertainment from it

Game & Watch Gallery 3 (Switch NSO: Game Boy Color)

I owned Game & Watch Gallery 2 as a young'un, and remember playing it endlessly so it was nice to give this one a go when the GB/C update for Nintendo Switch Online Dropped. As the third entry, it contains a lot less common Game & Watch games, but the modern spin on them using Mario characters gives it a lot of personality. Honestly, I'm surprised we don't see more of these games remade in recent Mario Parties as homages or just high score games you can do.

If you've never played a Game & Watch Gallery, I'd give this one a try as its fun, addicting little bites of gameplay are very enjoyable and there's loads of unlockable bonuses to keep your attention, but if you find you don't like a game or two in it it can be a slog to get the 1000 points to finish the whole game.

Wario Land 3 (Switch NSO: Game Boy Color)

For those unfamiliar with the Wario Land series (and yet somehow found me?), it's a very fun series of platformers which focus more on puzzle solving/execution than your typical Mario platformer. Wario Land 3 specifically took Wario Land 2's "Impossible to get a game over" formula and ran with it, also making this a fun little Metroidvania in the process. It's definitely among my favorite in the sereis, though it's held back by an obsession with its own mini-golf game which it has you play one every level (every level has 4 exits). Overall it's a great entry in Mario spinoffs and a very fun time, but be prepared to be frustrated by some pretty annoying jumps and a silly mini game

Super Mario Land 2: The 6 Golden Coins (Switch NSO: Game Boy)

I have a love-hate relationship with this one. I never got to play it fully when I was a kid, but returning back to it I loved it. But it's way, waaaaaay too short. With 6 worlds with 2-3 levels tops, and with a frustratingly focused screen due to the resolution of the original Screen, it's not got a lot of staying power. Would love to see it as a pallette in Super Mario Maker 3 though.

It's fun, but short. Don't expect to spend a lot of time with this, but hey; you're probably playing this as NSO sub or for free online so no loss with this classic

WarioWare, Inc.: Mega Microgame$ (Switch NSO: Game Boy Advance)

The original WarioWare! It's fun, but again pretty short. Worthj a play if you've never tried out a WW game before, but the best WarioWare portable experience is Going to be WarioWare Gold on the 3DS and the more recent switch escapades. Additionally, this doesn't have the Wario World functionality, which obviously it can't but that was part of the reason I played it back in the day. Good for some random fun, doesn't stand out as an experience vs the more recent WarioWares

Dead Estate: Heaven & Hell update

This is the update the game needed; it drastically improved the floor spawning algorithm, added a lot more interesting playstyles for each character, and added more enemies and gimmicks to keep you replaying over and over again. There are more updates past this that improve the game further, but with this I can whole-heartedly recommend this as a very fun and addictive rogue-like.

The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog (Steam)

What a wonderful April Fools game. My favorite game dev pranks are the one where they just silently drop a whole-ass spinoff.

A wonderful jaunt in the Sonic Universe! It's no secret that I love Sonic, and I've been keeping up with the IDW comic series (it's very good) since it started releasing a few years back and it's a wonderful fleshing out of characters and side-stories that main Sonic games will never address. This murder-mystery + special stage minigame was written and produced by the same writes on the IDW comics, and it's a very fun experience to see them get to make an interactive game with some humor while still getting to keep and flesh out the characters we never really get to see in Sonic Games. I highly recommend this for any Sonic fan, and hope this means we'll be seeing more in the way of sonic spin-offs in the future.

...

Also the IDW comic series is great! It takes a little to start with the first arc, but after that it's all I want out of a Sonic Comic. Tangle and Whisper are also cool as hell.

Lunistice (Steam)

This was a fun albeit short3D platformer, also looking like a PS1 original. I unfortunately didn't 100% it so I didn't finish the story and get the nuances of it, but as a platformer it was a fun romp. I'd recommend it as a fun labor of love, but not as something you can really dig your teeth into

Pizza Tower (Steam)

This game is really good! Feels great, first time in a while I've been like "Oh this is fun but really hard, I don't think I'll get good enough to 100% it" and then slowly but surely decided to. The only issue is some kinda old racist tropes being used in the western world which they really didn't need, but gameplay, visually, and musically this is a masterpiece. An essential part of any platformer fan's collection to have tried.

... If only they hadn't added more achievements I'd still have it 100%'d on Steam

Super Mario Bros. Peach's Adventure (SNES Classic romhack)

I saw this in a bit on Vinny's fullsauce channel about weird Mario hacks, and the only premise for this being weird was that Peach's design is nonstandard. It became apparent when he started playing that actually a ton of work and love went into it, so for the sake of the bit he moved on. I Proceeded to hack my SNES Classic so I could play this and boy was it worth it.

This romhack is adorable! IT's full of collectible's, has really fun levels, tons of references for any longtime Mario fan, and carries a nice aesthetic of the original SMB but with SMW's features so it's looks like a really amazing Mario Maker game. I loved it!

Across-Stitch (Itch.io)

It's Picross, but with colors! I'm a big running fan of Nintendo Picross games, and this came up on my recommended on itch so I decided to give it a try. Very fun, has a lot of puzzles, and is just a fun time waster. I got it on itch (linked), but honestly it'd be perfect for my phone had I done that

PAC-MAN CHAMPIONSHIP EDITION 2 (Steam)

So this one's kinda weird; Pac-man CE was one of my favorite games on the 360 (I didn't have many), and I thought the sequel would be it but just better since they'd solve the scoring problems. It was actually just like more of the same but with some different styles of play, and I found myself getting tired of it pretty fast. I have nostalgic memories of 1 so I'm probably looking at it with rose-tinted goggles, but this is a very passable arcade experience.

STEREOGRAM (itch.io)

I cannot in good conscience recommend you play this game, as looking at both screen this closely to do the stereogram and crossing your eyes for extended periods of time can cause permanent damage to your eyesight.

... But as a concept it was really neat! I did beat it with frequtn 5 minute breaks, and it only took a couple hours. Very basic metroidvania with fixed rooms to make the effect work.

Charm Studies (itch.io)

A very cute mixed visual novel and picross game! I like picross and this caught my eye, so I gave it a shot. Fun, but a bit short. But also free! Maybe try it out if you're not sure about picross yourself

Shantae: Risky's Revenge - Director's Cut

Longtime C7 fans will know I like Shantae quite a lot. And have an unhealthy amount of Shantae Merch. So when my Sister was visiting and I was feeling particularly self-conscious about playing games over the mic with friends, I decided to whip out this classic and finally 100% it. Shantae holds a special place in my heart for me, because I grew up an incredible prude with absolutely no interest in the kind of scandalous things that friends were starting to bring up. Whenever they tried to get me to watch Anime and watch stuff that had some fanservice, I felt wildly uncomfortable just because I didn't know how to process what I was seeing (and had undiagnosed anxiety and ADHD issues).

Shantae was the first time I saw something "suggestive" (read: cute girls in light outfits) tied with a style of gameplay I liked, and allowed me to kind of stop hating myself whenever these things came up. With this being a DSi game, meaning I could download it with nobody knowing I did, and the rave reviews it was getting by being one of the first DSi games available, I finally decided to purchase it. I loved the series ever since!

Getting back to this play-session, I decided to revisit this classic (my first experience with the series) and play it 100% with all the bells and whistles, including speedrun achievements. I got them all! For people who know what Shantae is, this is an essential entry into the series and a contender for top 3. If you've not played a Shantae game but like Metroidvania's, this or the recently released Seven Sirens are the best starting points

And yes, just to brag, that screenshot of the steam stats does mean I got the worst ending last and optimized my playtime.

My personal Shantae tier list, best to worst

Seven Sirens

Risky's Revenge tied with Pirate's Curse

Half-Genie Hero

Shantae GBC

Risky's Revolution, an unfinished GBA game in the series, was also announced to be resurrected and releasing next year, which is rad!

.. Anyway, onto another topic

TUNIC (Steam, played over steam link on the TV with a Controller away from the internet)

This was a hard one to get into, but a very fun one once I got the difficulty barrier and begun understanding the games' mechanics. I did end up getting the best ending, but not 100% all the achievements since that would've required more playthroughs, and the magic of figuring out the world would've been gone.

The use of the manuals, sudden realizations of mechanics, and really fun moments with some beautiful areas and items to figure out make this a wonderful game. Some of the bossess are.. not great, but on the whole I highly recommend this experience to people who want to feel what it was like in pre-internet days, having to solve a game's puzzles by charting out the world and coming to a deep understanding of its mechanics to find all the secrets. If you're easily frustrated or aren't a fan of 2D Zelda though, this is a pass

Cult of the Lamb (Steam)

This was one I was not expecting to get into. I saw it and thought "Hmm, I like games with a base-building aspect to them sometimes but a lot of the time that really gets in the way of the actual game." And to be honest, there were a few moments where juggling the two kinda did. Additionally, and this is a personal taste thing, the visuals of Don't Starve kinda don't appeal to me, so seeing a more cutesy version of that wasn't something I thought I'd love

... But this game is phenomenal! An incredibly fun rogue-lite game that mixes with base and resource management in a way that doesn't actually exclude someone who would like one over the other!

This was another one I 100% after a LOT of playtime and attempts at damageless bosses, but it was very worth it.

LEGO Builder's Journey (Steam)

I've been on Lego for the past few years, and this seemed like a fun little game that wasn't tied to any existing franchise so I gave it a go. It's an environmental puzzle game, where each micro-level has its own little puzzle where you need to figure out which pieces interact to (most of the time) get your little 1x1x2 lego guy to the other end of the stage.

It's very cute, and while a bit short ended up being the perfect length for this kinda game. The only thing I'd put against it is my computer had a rough time running it because they really wanted all the shaders and reflections to look great, so keep that in mind.

The Legend of Zelda: Minish Cap (Switch Online)

This is a weird one. I could've sworn I loved this game as a kid, and in fact this is what got me into 2D Zelda's because it was so much fun! Revisiting it though, I find it's one of the weaker entries in the series. The visuals look great, the story is as charming as you'd expect, and as someone who was really into windwaker and picked this up I was hooked, however it is by far one of the most tedious Zelda's I've played. The Dungeons are all relatively straightforward; while some offer an interesting mechanic from being small and making you think how larger objects affect the world, they still felt very linear.

Additionally, I had no idea just how grindy this game was at the time in comparison! Tons of the sidequests and rewards are visible fomr your first pass in an area, so as a result every time you get a new item you're tempted to go back and see if helps. The NPCs often block places as an obstacle that just move after a while (or a result of kinstone fusing), which made the game a lot more frustrating to remember things by. Kinstones themselves are annoying to find and even worse to use, as NPCs will randomly decide if they want to fuse or not. So to get everything you need to frequently visit and revisit the same places and NPCs over and over again, with no way of knowing if that random person has something you need to fuse with or is actually just a random person.

Additionally the figure collection, something I adored in WindWaker despite it being ridiculously grindy there too, has been reduced to a Gacha machine. A heart piece is locked behind collecting them all, which means for 100% completion you have to collect ALL the figurines, including ones only available after you clear your file, making the final heart piece effectively useless. Worse, the act of collecting them is a gargantuan time sink; it takes loads of time to go through dialog, even more to collect the rupees you need, and the "chance" system doesn't quite work how you'd expect. With me cheating to get 999 rupees in gambling all the time and going through all the prompts to get all these, it took me 3 hours. That's quadrupled at least if you play the game properly.

Never 100% this game, but as far as 2D zelda's go this is definitely not a terrible entry; just a bit uninspired. I'd recommend ALTTP, ALBW, or Link's Awakening over this myself.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom (Switch)

I would have some fun screenshots but deleted my twitter so they're gone now, oh well.

I'm not gonna go too far in depth on this one; It's breath of the Wild but >2x larger with some wild building mechanics and a really good story. A fantastic game that may see age as the open-world genre gets saturated, but quite frankly one of the best games you'll ever see on the switch.

Annalynn (Switch)

I followed the artist on Twitter (when I still had one) and really liked the retro feel of it. It's a fun classic arcade game, however like some of those classic arcade games I found myself frustrated by its difficulty while still not grasping the hardest nuances of its mechanics enough to get good at it. It's fun, but I'd see if it's for you by watching the videos first.

Part 2 coming later today!

[kultofathena]

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✨Lord of Battles Large Dark Ages Viking Shield✨

In the hands of a skilled warrior, the flat, round shield is as much a weapon as the sword, axe or spear in the opposing hand – the two together form a joint offensive and defensive combat style. A skilled warrior not only uses a center-grip shield to deflect projectiles and absorb hits; with the rim pointed outward toward the foe and thrust closely to him, the shield can be used to deny entire avenues of attack from his weapon – he will be unable to strike with the shield in the way of main striking angles. In this way the shield can offensively deny an opponent the chance to strike instead of just passively absorbing hits.

Full review available to watch on our YT channel.

Available to order now