#dear god i love talking

[grimescum-2]

saw you were reworking ocs tell me about them :>

HIIII!!!!! i'm looking at yoy SOO evilly rn. rubbibg my little hands together soo mischievously you dont even know what you signed up for

long ass paragraphs under the cut 😈😈 i dont think its a lot to read but i tend to talk a lot ... so... i dont blame you for not reading all of it but if you do i'm literally grabbing u and shaking u and hugging you

basically i have.. like. a LOT of ocs i'm unhappy with (be it their design or backstory) and for a long while i've been working on them passively.. though as of recent i've been taking a more direct approach to developing some of my favourites AND working on a few new concepts at the same time :o3 (this might sound like a lot but i dont do anything EVER i literally only lay in bed and sleep)

for the new concepts i've been focusing mainly on this guy (any pronouns)

considering the boogie man or just boogie for a name. they're 7 ft tall and they love to scare and confuse the shit out of people.. but only sometimes. they're relatively chill otherwise, though they keep their intentions unclear. if the spirals didn't say this then they were very inspired by michael (the magnus archives) and uzumaki !! basically they're michael but with 60s-80s aesthetics (i plan on giving them more purple and a hippie/disco vibe)

a few other less notable ones are a sona, a jester (inspired by jevil) and a VERY self indulgent zombie scientist oc to feed the reanimator brainrot

for pre-existing ocs- all of my mains are getting some kind of revamp so i won't speak on all of them, but the closest to being finished is Frenzy!! heres one of a few concepts i'm happiest with:

she's like... a partial sona in a way. i might insert her into fandoms i like if i can get over the embarrassment and shame (i love seeing other people do it but when i do it i feel bad BHABAHA) BUT in short she's a 22 year old neet hikikomori who's only hobbies are watching horror movies, anime and browsing the internet. that + her family trauma and her poor health and mental illness naturally makes her a little crazy, to say the least. she's also transgender mtf because i support trans wrongs!!!!! i plan on giving her design a v-kei, menhera, pastel goth and yume kawaii vibe.

lastly, claudine is still in the works but I've made a fair bit of progress :o3 she's going to be a lot less harmlessly silly and just a little tiny bit more evil in the sense that she feels like recruiting vampires and giving them access to blood and people in exchange for working at her circus is a necessary evil that must be done to put on the greatest show in the world, an aspiration fueled by both her genuine desire to leave a positive impact on the world and her greed for fame. still as silly as ever.. if not more so, since watching The Mask gave me a LOT of inspo for her character BHABAHA

[romansmartini]

can we hold hands and listen to this together

[sunnyside-sunset]

hey hey i forgot about this why didnt you just punch me in the stomach instead of whatever this is youre actually evil youre actually diabolical how could you do this to me im just a guy who misses his familia

[bandtrees]

ONE: ok guys here’s an arc about mob, in his growth as a person, being confronted with an ideology he’s unfamiliar with, and he has to learn from it but also understand why it’s unhealthy and bad to properly grow from it and choose kindness in the end, albeit in a more nuanced way than before, and this will make mob more able to confront later problems in the season that can’t be solved with mere kindness and require a deep understanding of loneliness and solitude, something he hasn’t had much room to speak on until now. To express mob being shown this villain’s ideology we have a sequence where we see how mogami views the world and by extension how he sees mob, by putting mob in the kind of sad fucked up world he thinks exists, but mob will overcome it with the knowledge that in the real world he has people he cares about and that even the people who make the world bad sometimes can change and nobody is a static evil and kindness and courage when you’re going through hardship goes a long way. despite the darkness this is ultimately a very uplifting experience for him and a show that life is always more than its darkest moments, and also how picking yourself up instead of wallowing in your own suffering and trauma is hard but a very courageous act and what makes mob stronger than mogami

mp100 fans with tunnel vision: Oh so mob was tortured for six months and is sad? He’s literally so sad and traumatized and nobody is talking about this?

[kazumahashimoto]

you're colder than i remember

[fujii-draws]

Redraws of one of my first dadnoir posts :]!!

EXTRA >:]]

[usereddie]

hi bia, I want to know your opinion re eddie cheating and latino culture/catholicism. I feel like in many ways a man cheating is something so normal in latin families (idk how this applies for latin people in the us but it's definitely a thing when living in latin america) and that's something that doesn't cause as much struggle with catholicism and "sin", as being queer does. I find it interesting how of course there's a loss that eddie thinks may happen if he cuts that last link to his religion connected to latino culture by coming out/coming to terms with his sexuality, that just doesn't seem to happen with other "sins"... idk if you've watched Brooklyn 99, but in there there's a Latina that comes out as bi to her parents and in the scene they basically tell her they'd rather she was dating someone married than admit that she was queer, and I feel like that's it, even tho I'm not sure eddie is aware of, he's falling into this (i believe) specific latino man stereotype where it's okay to do a lot of bad things, things maybe not accepted by the religion but unfortunately accepted by the culture, as long as you DON'T do the worst thing ever, which is being queer... idk if this makes sense lol, maybe it's not a thing lol, you dont have to post it I just dont have any other latino people i follow that may understand it, sorry

god, yeah, it's totally a thing. i grew up in texas but i was born and now live in latin america and this is so, so true. there are sins men are allowed to commit in latino communities because the sins are still "masculine". cheating on your girlfriend (they're not even married) is nothing. who cares. it still aligns with the misogyny that runs so rampant in latino culture. eddie sleeps with multiple women even though he has a girlfriend? oh, she wasn't enough him. she wasn't doing her job to keep him satisfied. it's a moral failing on her part, not his. and eddie's not that kind of guy, we know that, but this is all he learned growing up. it's very, very easy to fall back on the excuses you've heard a dozen times even when you know it's cruel. eddie dates two women at once and doesn't tell either of them? he's a firefighter, he's a single father, his life is stressful enough. let him have two women so when one gets high maintenance and irritating he can go to the other.

this is real! this is so real! it's so fucked up!

eddie breaks up with both marisol and not-shannon and gets with buck, though?

that'd be a problem. i have no doubt in mind eddie grew up hearing gay as an insult and faggot thrown around casually because homophobia is casual, not only in latino communities, but in the american south in general. he saw the way men who cheated would show up to mass with their wife against their side. her eyes were always so heartbroken, but that's something he's allowed. it's his right as a man. how can you fault his nature?

queerness is wrong, though. it's an abomination. you can't even confess to your sins because the church won't let you inside anymore. eddie can feel guilty for cheating on marisol all he wants, but guilt over something he's allowed is still better than bone deep shame over something he has not control over being.

and eddie's gonna hate himself for it! he's done so much to unlearn the worst parts of machismo, the parts that hurt him the most as a child, but god is it easy to fall back on when you need an excuse. his dad was absent most of his life growing up, but that's okay because he was providing. men don't sin for no reason. their wife isn't enough, they need to provide for their kids, their kids are a little too queer and need fixing. a heavy hand is better than an eternity in hell.

it's so complex. it's such a complicated relationship with himself, with religion, with being latino. god can judge him but how will he handle the judgment from his family. the church can hate him all they want but how is he supposed to handle the side eyes and whispers when he shows up to his high school friend's wedding and there's no plus one because it's either show up single or show up with a man.

men are allowed sin. men are allowed moral failing.

men are not allowed queerness.

and as much as eddie has been doing so much good work to unlearn that, the nasty, nails in your skin part of growing up latino are just as impossible to shed as the skin that covers your bones.

(also, yes, i did watch b99 and i remember that!)

[lloydfrontera]

It hurt. Every time that man put up a blatantly false front and tried to bear the burdens all alone, it shook and broke Javier's heart.

god. javier not just,, being upset about lloyd trying to deal with everything on his own but honest to god being heartbroken about it. ok that's. that's fine.

Why would you want to bear the burdens all by yourself? Just why? [...] Why can't you just tell me that you're having a tough time? Why can't you admit that you're afraid?

javier,,, wanting lloyd to tell him when he's overwhelmed, when he's afraid, when he needs help because he wants to help him, more than anything, he just wants lloyd to trust him so he can be of help,,, that's. that's soooo fine.

What an idiot. Javier's clenching became tighter as he strengthened his resolve on one side to protect his idiotic friend, regardless of the adversity that came their way. The grandmaster was determined to keep his pretentious, cowardly buddy safe. So stop being a crybaby about your own death. You're not going to die, and I'm going to ensure it. Even it really comes our way, I will die in your place instead. I am willing to.

javier. deciding that he'll protect lloyd no matter what, that he will keep him safe from anything that may happen so he should stop being afraid because javier won't allow anything to happen to him. he shouldn't be afraid of dying because even if death came their way, javier would die for him first. this is so so so sooo fineeee.

Javier breathed a small sigh again, as the fraudster's subtle crying noise still reached his ears. The grandmaster's heart broke as he hear the sound that leaked out through Lloyd's palms or the blanket, whichever he was covering his face with. Jeez. It was a long night. Javier wished for the darkness to go away as he lifted his chin and stared at the ceiling. The night was perhaps too long.

THIS IS FINE. SO SOOO SO SO SO SOO FINE I SWEAR

[idekwtf-is-happening]

Damien’s currently getting cancelled on Twitter for *checks to make sure I’m reading this shit right* apologizing for a joke he made five years ago where he mentioned the conflict in Gaza

[evelynpr]

Arlecchino Demo Music Analysis

DISCLAIMER: I am no musical expert in any way, just a massive fan of the Genshin soundtrack and learned music theory as a hobby.

One of my favorite things about Genshin is its music. It is not just that it sounds amazing, but each element, style, and motif has meaning and purpose- while being orchestrated and mixed to create a truly magnificent and unique musical experience. It is no exaggeration that this soundtrack is one of a kind.

Arlecchino's Character Demo has just been released, so I want to make a musical breakdown of it because I think it is a stellar example of how Genshin uses music to signify its themes and present its story. Before we get into that, there are ideas that I must detail for you to get the full picture, so I hope you enjoy!

Genshin uses musical elements to signify certain ideas (places, characters, elements, etc.). For example, Chinese and Japanese instrumentation signify Liyue and Fontaine respectively, but it goes beyond this.

"Travelers' Reverie" — Behind the Scenes of the Music of Sumeru | Genshin Impact

You may have noticed that a majority of Genshin's environmental music consists of real world instruments. There are even videos showcasing the orchestras and instruments of each nation (Mondstadt, Liyue, Inazuma, Sumeru, Fontaine), and using orchestral/live instruments even applies to other regions such as Enkanomiya, The Chasm, Golden Apple Archipelago, and etc. This gives each region a distinct musical identity, but all together it establishes them as places that are grounded and real.

During the final act of Fontaine's archon quest, we have been introduced to a new musical identity. This is Genshin's dubstep, and it has been used to signify otherworldly power. This genre not made by a real orchestra or real instruments, but through sampling (using existing sounds/music) and technology.

This is the identity in its most blatant form: (Shadow phase of the All Devouring Narwal boss fight)

This entire track symbolizes this. No other track within Genshin's world sounds remotely like it, symbolizing its otherworldly nature. It does not belong here- not with the live orchestras and melodic symphonies of Genshin's world.

Simply put, hardcore dubstep = otherworldly

Note: I am aware that many character demos and other tracks also use dubstep/EDM, but for the purposes of this post I think it should be left separate. Only if someone openly disputes this conclusion then I would happily oblige in presenting more evidence to this thru a reply or rb. Essentially, dubstep IS used in other tracks, but only in Silhouette of Catastrophe and Arlecchino's demo is the dubstep used as a"main idea", while also accompanied by heavy bass and "smaller intricate" sounds. This specific form of dubstep is what signifies being otherworldly.

Another musical element is children's singing!

In terms of the in-game ost, children's singing is used most prominently in Dragonspine's soundtrack in Genshin's world- and I will admit that I am not sure why that is. Perhaps Dragonspine has themes relating to innocence? Childhood? Tranquility? Whatever it is, I am not sure of. (If you have an idea, I would love to know!)

Instead, we can look at a certain character demo:

Nahida's! The beatdrop of her demo begins with children's singing. I believe this represents her innocent nature, status as a young archon, and the children of the forest that surround her- the Aranara.

Not only that, but the only other people in her demo are all children. Suffice to say, Genshin pays very close attention to using their music to reflect the themes and attributes of their characters in their demos (I could make more posts about this- breaking down more demo music...I think that'd be fun)

It's fairly straightforward, but essentially children's singing = children, innocence, and childhood

Now let's (finally) look at Arlecchino's demo

Let's first review each of the main musical elements and what they represent:

Dubstep and distortion: Otherworldly power. For Arlecchino: her curse, power, and dominance. "A spark cannot shatter all shadows until it sets all ablaze"

Children's voices and music box: Children. For Arlecchino: a lullaby; possibly protectiveness/care or tainted innocence (depending on how you interpret how she sees her children)

The music begins with a solo piano- lonely, melancholic, and mysterious. This is how she is after the death of Clervie and the rest of the children of the HotH.

Afterwards, the piano gets distorted- then replaced with harsh artificial beats and musical turmoil. This may be reflected on how she defeated her "mother" using her otherworldly power- her curse.

Following this is the anticipated beatdrop. Fascinatingly, it is not actually lead by dubstep, but by a distorted music box with a creeping melody. Not only that, but it is accompanied by a children's choir and a drum beat together.

The dubstep then ramps up- completely overtaking the track. But one it has reached its height, it is interrupted by the music box and singing children.

One can interpret this as her children holding her back from unleashing her true power. When she is most ruthless and violent, she is reminded of their playfulness and innocence.

The choir ends abruptly- but afterwards, the children's voices and music box lead the melody, while the dubstep and distortions accompany it harmoniously to create one whole piece.

This is who Arlecchino is. A Father and Harbringer defined by "caring" for her children and her otherworldly power. A love that nurtures and neglects- a power that frees and destroys. A wolf in sheep's clothing, or a sheep in wolf's clothing?

However the demo doesn't end there- the solo piano returns once again.

"Its flame is no longer needed, for you have the strength to defend yourselves"

This is going into speculative territory, but perhaps after she passes on her title as "king", she is once again lonely, left without a family. After all, she may no longer be needed or wanted at all- not after all that she has done, not after all that she has failed to do.

Conclusion

I love Genshin's music from the bottom of my heart. One reason why is the attention, detail, and beauty put into each track. Each piece is not only an experience, but also a story, an idea, a character, a place, whatever the artists wish to portray.

Arlecchino's Character Demo is one but many pieces that showcase this. In this track, we are able to discern Arlecchino's two core ideas, her relationship with her children and otherworldly power, through an incredible combination of singing, a music box, and dubstep. One can even theorize the course of her story through its visuals and music, in the end creating a beautiful and encompassing display of "Arlecchino".

[arkiwii]

a heart of stone

[andr0nap-wf]

me for the past few months: im gonna be responsible with my plat and save what i have for something important 😤

also me, yesterday: *spends my saved plat on drifter fashion* this qualifies as important

[maikhiwi00]

TRANSFORMERS: GENERATION 1 (1984-1987) 4.01 | The Rebirth, Part 1

[prismatic-starstuff]

okay was anyone going to tell me that ascended Astarion calls MC 'little love' and 'my treasure' in the smoothest most sultry voice I've ever heard or was I just supposed to get absolutely smacked around the head with that knowledge myself—

[goldiipond]

ray tpn is autistic and i'm gonna tell you why now

ray is one of the most heavily autistic-coded characters i can think of, and i've been wanting to write up a post going over as many of his autistic mannerisms as i can because there is a lot. this will probably be long because i am also autistic and i am especially autistic about ray, so please enjoy while i psychoanalyze this anime boy with way more scrutiny than anyone would consider healthy <3

body language

perhaps one of the strongest arguments for ray's autism can be made by looking at his body language. ray tries to keep a stoic, neutral expression and voice the majority of the time (though he's often quite. bad at that too) but he is always extremely expressive through his movements and gestures, the most noticeable of which being the use of his hands. pretty much every character uses hand gestures, but ray is ridiculously excessive. it'd take frankly way too long to compile every instance of this (or even half) throughout the manga, so here's a small collection of gestures from s1 of the anime to give an idea:

note that this is not even close to all of them and that he's exactly like this in the manga as well, though the animation and its use of snappy, exaggerated movements does help to make these much more noticeable.

moving away from his hands there's also just a lot of really expressive full-body language as well, such as this friendly chokehold:

this dramatic shrug:

and this even more dramatic flop:

just to name a few. basically, ray has a thing for grand unnecessary movements and no one is surprised.

poor emotional regulation and masking

as i mentioned before, ray tries really really hard to bottle up his emotions and keep a sort of stoic persona during his time at gracefield. he's also really really bad at doing this. not terrible, as he was able to keep up a believable enough front that none of the other kids saw anything odd about his behavior for 6 years, but that's also because he deals with so much more stress once the events of the escape arc actually get going. there is a stark difference between his quiet and detached demeanor while emma and norman are still in the dark about the house, and him nearly having a meltdown every time something strays from his meticulously crafted plans while they actually begin making their preparations to escape over the course of the arc.

just a few examples of this include him nearly having a breakdown when emma insists on taking everyone:

or one of my favorite anime exclusive moments where he strains his voice while yelling at isabella to the point he breaks into a coughing fit:

and it's not just big flashy meltdowns, but little bursts of anger as well. shoutout to this moment in particular where he launches this bucket with enough force to tear up a bit of the damn ground:

this emotional instability can be seen after the escape as well, the most glaring example being how he interacts with yuugo:

their dynamic in general really does a good job of showing ray’s mental state after the escape, because pre-goldy pond yuugo is An Asshole. and ray is so, so easy to piss off and quite frankly tired from bottling up his emotions for so long that every interaction with said asshole is a massive struggle to keep himself from physically attacking him.

as for the topic of masking, that’s what ray’s attempts to hide his emotions feel like to me. ray is constantly in danger of losing isabella’s trust, whether that be by revealing he may be a little more attached to the other kids than he lets on or by showing too much emotion that the other kids start to wonder what the hell’s going on. ray has to constantly hide and cover up his emotions with more palatable ones for others out of fear of looking out of place or being seriously hurt, and well if that doesn’t just describe autistic masking to a tee i don’t know what does.

maybe one of the things that gets me the most about that is that he's essentially been masking for about half of his life, and doing that for any extended period of time is extremely draining. ray has been drained to the point that he will have full meltdowns when put under any sort of stress and when you take into account the fact that he already has pretty severe anger issues as a result of his trauma, it's really no wonder he has such a short fuse.

lack of a filter when speaking

ray is a very blunt person. he speaks matter-of-factly and he wastes no time in getting straight to his point, sometimes with only a single sentence:

the way he talks is also pretty significant, as he generally has a more monotone way of speaking. he really only yells when he gets really worked up which like i said, happens a lot, but there’s almost no inbetween for him. pre-escape, he tries to show as little emotion in his voice as possible outside of his outbursts.

as for post-escape ray, he does seem to show much more emotion in the way he speaks. its a bit harder to judge, as nothing past the escape arc was ever adapted into the anime (s2 isnt real it cant hurt you) but his facial expressions become much more varied and it’s easy to say his vocal inflections likely do as well. however, what we can say for sure is that he remains just as blunt as ever:

no matter how comfortable he becomes with expressing himself, this aspect of his speech never seems to change.

while we’re on the topic of his speaking mannerisms please also direct your attention to these panels:

these need no explanation.

sensory issues. so many sensory issues

briefly moving back to the subject of ray’s hands, i couldn’t help but notice during my countless s1 rewatches that they are almost never just resting at his sides. if he's not using his hands for unnecessary gestures they are either shoved into his pockets, or he's crossing his arms. it's very likely his arms default to these positions because they offer a sort of sense of security, the former keeping his hands covered and the latter keeping him more closed off, almost like he's constantly hugging himself. basically, ray is a 'likes to feel covered and secure' autistic and if he was buried in weighted blankets he'd probably love it.

also tying into the ‘likes to feel covered’ aspect of ray’s autism is this scarf he acquires sometime during the volume 12 timeskip:

it’s a well known autistic thing to get attached to articles of clothing and wear them as much as possible, and boy does ray get attached to this scarf. i can count 2 post-timeskip scenes off the top of my head that have him not wearing this scarf, and the image on the right takes place a full 2 years after the left one in canon. he has no explicitly stated emotional attachment to this scarf and we don’t even know how he got it, just that he almost never takes it off. it could easily be seen as a comfort item, maybe he just likes the way the fabric feels or the extra coverage it offers him. there is post-canon content that depicts him without it, but the fact that he wore it almost nonstop for at least 2 years straight is still pretty significant.

another sensory thing i feel is worth mentioning is that ray seems to have a very specific tolerance threshold for physical contact. he seems fine initiating touch himself, and touches from emma and norman are generally alright, likely because they are the only people he has openly allowed himself to be close with his entire life. sudden touches from others however, are a different story. the one that immediately comes to mind is this interaction with don:

don in particular is someone ray becomes pretty close to, and i would say that besides the obvious growth with emma and norman, don is likely the person we see the most development with with in terms of their relationship. him having this reaction to a hug from someone he’s so close to seems indicative of some issues with unexpected contact.

and finally one of my absolute favorite things the anime added, which is ray experiencing what looks a lot like sensory overload:

this takes place right after the argument with isabella, which ended with him being knocked to the floor and locked up in a room by himself, so its needless to say that he’s pretty shaken up. he gets so overwhelmed that all he can do is yell and desperately reach for any sort of stimulation to keep him grounded, curling in on himself and aggressively ruffling up his hair. i genuinely cannot think of an allistic explanation for this scene.

and basically, he is just so autistic

all in all, theres some pretty damn solid evidence for ray being autistic and whether it was intentional or not, the sheer amount of autism-coding present in ray’s writing is almost impossible to ignore. i love some good projection but i don’t even need to do that much, hes just doing this all on his own. in conclusion:

[moreclaypigeons]

No like seriously ARE we ready to talk about the misogyny in fandom spaces