#dela x shangela

[jinkx-monswoon]

it ain't no big deal, it's innocent 💋

(alternate title: top 10 anime first kisses <3)

[artificialqueens]

You Bring Out the Best in Me (Bengela) - vulnerose

Rambly A.N. - Hi guys! So this is meant to combine two requests I got, one being with Dela having a panic attack and the other with either Shangela/Dela being flirty and the other not noticing until said person finally makes a move. I love reading longer fanfics so I thought rather than giving two short ones, I’d just combine them into one. (And of course, why not both having a crush on each other?) Apologies if any characters here are OOC, I try my best but I haven’t written fanfiction in a long time until recently so my skills are rusty. I’m always up for prompts so if you ever want one just comment on either my posts on the artificalqueens tumblr or AO3, my user is vulnerose there as well. Andddd of course this has nothing to do with any of the people mentioned! Enjoy my loves :)

ALSO if you’d want to see a potential sequel to this just let me know. I’m honestly considering doing it, I loved writing this fic so much.

The pressure was getting too much for Dela to handle.

It was her junior year of high school, where the competition to look as good as possible academically-wise had truly kicked off. Teachers were so much tougher than they had been in the earlier years, and she found herself crying in her bedroom after school. Every. Single. Day.

It wasn’t like Dela wasn’t a good student - she was. She was a straight A all honors student, and had been since middle school. She’d decided to challenge herself to taking four AP classes, thinking she could handle the stress since she’d enjoyed taking AP Euro the previous year. But dear god was she wrong. Bio projects were daily, her APUSH teacher was super demanding and offered no test corrections, statistics was fucking her over mentally, and she could barely write a rhythm in music theory. It was draining her mentally and physically - she had to work her ass off to maintain all As. Even then, her parents still found a way to demand more out of her.

She couldn’t count the number of times she just wanted to sleep, but couldn’t because of a report she needed to write. Dela was notorious for having coffee with her every morning. She didn’t do it purposely or for show, she couldn’t survive a day without a large cup of coffee, since she rarely got more than 5 hours of sleep. In the mornings she’d put layer after layer of concealer under her eyes to cover up the ever growing bags down there, and red-reducing eye drops became her best friend. She surprisingly rarely broke out, maybe a bit of acne here and there but her skin was rather clear.

Despite all the stress eating away at her mentally, she still managed to be the sweet, always delightful girl everyone had come to know her as. She never snapped at anyone, even when they were yelling in her ear and she’d barely had any caffeine. Her image was very important to her, and she stopped at nothing to maintain it.

It was midterm time, the most stressful time of year by far, second of course to finals. Dela had anticipated this week for a bit now, studying hard for long hours and attempting to prepare herself mentally. Each midterm intercepted at least one other, and it wasn’t too long before Dela was aware that she’d be taking all of her midterms on one day. One fucking day. She nearly broke down in tears when she realized this.

The day before midterms started, Dela decided she couldn’t care less and allowed herself to destress completely, as she knew she’d only worsen the upcoming anxiety attacks if she worried over a stupid worksheet right now. The anxiety set in right after school, when she immediately began reading page after page in her history book, doing practice problems, rereading her English novel, practicing her flute, and working on her big bio lab that acted as a midterm that was due tomorrow.

She fell asleep at 4 after being confident she would be alright. She had to wake up at 7.

She walked into the exam room the following day, bags unconcealed, eyes red and puffy, contacts bothering her, and head pounding from a migraine. The second she was handed that paper, anxiety took off and in the most minute moment, her throat felt like it was being suffocated, tears trying to well in her eyes, head more focused on people tapping their stupid fucking feet on the ground. Her fingers and thighs were shaking, completely enslaved to the major panic attack she was experiencing. Her brain was focusing on anything but the paper in front of her. ‘You pulled your ponytail just a TAD too harsh. Now it’ll be the only thing you think about.’

She miraculously survived, and asked immediately afterwards to go to the bathroom. The panic attack was subsiding but fear began to grow again. What if she failed all of them? Would her mom disown her? What if they thought I was cheating because I was looking around the room so often? I couldn’t help myself, right? It was the anxiety, not me right?

Dela locked herself in a stall and just sat there recollecting her thoughts and allowing the panic to subside. God, how she wished someone was here to make her feel better right now. Jinkx had ended up missing midterms incredibly narrowly, as her family’s yearly trip to Seattle had been scheduled to start the day before. Jinkx always had shitty cellular up there so there was no way she’d be talking to her until after the Christmas break ended. Aja was still taking her midterms and so was Trixie, and Alaska was probably too busy with Roxxxy and Detox to watch her cry about her everything.

She pushed at the chipping nail polish on her thumb, sighing heavily as she thought. Nobody really cared for her, did they? Dela always felt that she had a sufficient friend group, people that had her best interests in mind no matter what, but the realization dawned on her that no, no she didn’t. She couldn’t think of one person that would be able to comfort her right now. That person was always Jinkx, but now she had to find a way to deal with her emotional breakdowns on her own until her best friend returned. And she didn’t know how to take that.

That is, of course, until her brain and the voices inside began to taunt her and laugh, saying she was dumb, unlovable, forgettable; the list went on and on and on. Tears began to run down Dela’s cheek as she couldn’t stop the voices from continuing to spew hateful words at her, telling her how she’s a disappointment of a daughter and how all of her friends really just felt sorry for her. That she bombed all of her midterms and she’d be rejected by everyone.

Logically Dela knew it wasn’t true - nobody would hate her for failing a test, but she couldn’t help but believe the other two. Since when had her parents been truly proud of her? And since when did the majority of the girls she called friends ever text or call her? Even hang out with her? She couldn’t think of a time, date, or place.

Dela was fully broken down and worn out, crying from stress and panic and relief and sadness all at once. She’d never truly felt so useless and vulnerable until this day in time. Dela was grateful she hadn’t worn makeup, at least there’d be no tear stains on her skin.

Her crying session was abruptly ended by a voice.

“What’s going on in there mama? Don’t know who’s in there or what’s going on but it’s something. I’m not leaving until I help you darling.”

Dela’s eyes widened as she instantly recognized the voice. Shangela Waldey. Head cheerleader, but in the few times she’s spoken with her, seemed nice. They shared a couple of classes too. Her ugly crying stopped and was replaced by quiet sniffling.

“Honey? C'mon, tell me what’s up. Or come out and I can give you a hug or something.”

A hug did sound pretty nice right now.

Dela came out of the cubicle with her face red, eyes even bluer than usual from crying, and Shangela’s heart broke at the sight. She didn’t know Dela well, but it hurt to see the usually sweet and happy girl stripped down and miserable.

“Oh sweetie…” Shangela’s arms reached out and wrapped around Dela’s body, and Dela felt a sense of comfort and relief. She continued to cry but it definitely wasn’t as audible as it’d been before. Dela tried to avoid crying all over Shangela’s cheerleader uniform but Shangela wasn’t having it and whispered for her to not worry. Shangela rubbed her back to try and relieve the poor girl, wondering who made a girl so precious and gentle cry like this.

“What’s wrong honey? You’re always so happy. Did someone hurt you?” Dela blinked at her, shaking her head slowly, both still keeping the hug.

“Wasn’t anyone. I’m so stressed out Shangela, I just finished taking all my exams today. My brain has been so fried this entire year and I’m really scared that I’m gonna do shit on them.” Dela began to bawl again as she told the girl what was bothering her. Shangela’s hand began to play with Dela’s hair as she continued to listen to the girl talk. “My closest friend is away and I can’t talk to her right now and I feel like nobody cares about me. I can’t think of one person that I could talk to right now, none of them like me. I just feel like a tremendous failure.” Shangela broke the hug, holding one of Dela’s hands in hers, other lightly pointing up Dela’s chin so she could look her straight in the eye.

“Don’t know you that well honey, it’s the truth. But from what I do know, you’re anything but what your brain tells you that you are. I’m sorry you feel that way sweetheart, because it’s not true at all. You’re not a failure, and if you really feel like you don’t have anyone that you can talk to, I’m here.” Dela’s eyes widened slightly - she wasn’t expecting that kind of a response. From the moment Shangela broke the hug she thought she would taunt her and get her popular friends to begin bullying her.

“Got a lot on your mind, don’t you?” Shangela was smiling with both her eyes and mouth, watching Dela stare into space. Dela snapped out of it almost immediately.

“Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting you to say that.” Dela stopped momentarily to wipe the tears from her eyes before continuing. “Why do you care about me? Like you have so many friends and you’re so popular, why me?”

Shangela couldn’t help but laugh. “Girl you think I give a shit about 99% of the people I hang out with? You can’t trust them with any secrets you got, all they wanna do is get drunk on weekends, they’re barely passing their classes right now, fucking ridiculous. Partying and failing isn’t my schtick, only reason why they keep me around is because without me, there’s no cheerleading team.” Shangela so badly wanted to form a true friendship with someone, and had always found Dela to be a sweetheart - not to mention quite beautiful too - and she couldn’t pass up this opportunity to get to know her better.

Dela sat down on the bench beside them, Shangela joining her, waiting her response. Dela buried her head in Shangela’s shoulder, whispering ‘thank you’ over and over again.

Shangela felt her heart begin to fly, and she couldn’t think of why.

Shangela broke the hug, grabbing Dela’s hand and walking the both of them to the sink. “C'mon honey, let’s get your face washed so you don’t look like a hot mess. If you can let’s hang out after school.”

Dela smiled at her, dousing her face in cold water, feeling energy soar through her as it hit her face. “Sure, that sounds lovely.”

After sharing phone numbers, the two of them grabbed their backpacks, ready to head out after spending far too long in there. Shangela’s hand fumbled in the front pocket of her backpack, searching for a box of Altoids. She took one in her mouth.

“Have one girl, you need it after all the coffee you drink.” She could tell Shangela was being playful - nothing in the blonde’s voice indicated bad intents.

Dela laughed, taking one out and popping it in her mouth, the peppermint freshening her breath.

“See you soon girl,” Shangela waved goodbye, heading out of the bathroom.

Dela’s face was illuminated with the biggest smile it’s ever had. She didn’t really know why. “See you soon,” she whispered back, in the silence of the bathroom.

—————————————————

The past couple of weeks had been some of the best either of them had in their lives. They spent time hanging out as often as they could, and texted on those days they just couldn’t be together in person, especially when Shangela had work. It excited Shangela to have a real person for a friend - not a fake, popularity-obsessed one. She could talk to Dela about seemingly anything, from grades to personal issues and everything in between. Dela always listened and gave her advice when she needed it. Shangela was, for the first time, not feeling left to the side in a friendship. She felt like Dela truly cared about her and her wellbeing.

Dela didn’t know what to expect initially, but had all her doubts and scared about Shangela shut down that first time they hung out after the bathroom incident. She just had an aura consisting of genuine, loving, reality-checking behavior that Dela just loved. Shangela was never one to lie - she always told it how it was and she respected her immensely for that as it’s so easy to lie. She initially thought of Shangela being a substitute for Jinkx but she no longer viewed her in that manner - she was nothing like Jinkx. She was just uniquely Shangela, and when Jinkx returned from Seattle she couldn’t wait to tell her what’d just gone down.

“You’re friends with who?” Jinkx whisper-screamed at Dela, a bewildered look on the ginger’s face as she attempted to take in what Dela had just told her. The two were in Dela’s bedroom for a sleepover, where Dela just unraveled the news to her friend.

Dela snorted at her response. “You heard me.”

“Christ, I leave for one week and a year’s events have gone by. I’m warning you right now, if she ever hurts you or you let her I’m personally beating her into a pulp.” She pointed a finger directly at Dela when she said the last fragment of her sentence, establishing her meaning well and clear.

Dela threw a pillow in her face. “She’s not gonna do that, I promise.”

Jinkx got off the floor, rolling herself into Dela’s bed and shutting off the lamp as she turned on the TV. “Don’t make a promise too soon. Now let’s watch something before I pass out.”

—————————————————

It had been a month since Shangela and Dela had first met that day, and Dela was just now getting to see Shangela’s apartment - purely because the two had to finish a biology project they’d been assigned to work together on.

Shangela fumbled with her keys as Dela stood behind her in the hallway of the building. “It’s not much to look at so don’t be surprised.” Dela laughed as Shangela finally managed to get the door to unlock after numerous tries.

Closing the door behind her, Shangela led Dela around and allowed her to take in her surroundings. The apartment was rather simple - it had both a modern and cozy feel to it. Dela couldn’t help but notice the lack of people in the apartment.

As soon as they got to Shangela’s room, and both of the girls plopped down on her bed, Dela decided to ask her what the deal was with it. “Hey Shangie?”

Shangela’s head turned toward her, putting down her phone. “What’s up sweetheart?”

The cute nickname made Dela’s heart fly, but she tried to not let it be visible. “I’m sorry if this is rude to ask, but you appear to live by yourself, how come?”

If there was one thing that hurt Shangela slightly, it was talking about what had happened between her and her parents. Dela immediately sensed the discomfort on Shangela’s face after she’d asked her the question, and instantly felt like shit. She reached a hand out and rubbed Shangela’s shoulder in a comforting manner.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to Shangie, I’m sorry if I hurt you in anyway.”

“It’s ok, just that it’s hard what I went through with my parents.” Shangela paused momentarily, deciding whether she should say the next thing or not. “Promise you won’t judge me for what I’m about to say?”

“Unless you murdered someone, I have no judgement in my heart towards you,” Dela reassured her, smiling with her eyes.

She took a deep breath before continuing. “So when I was around 13, my mom caught me watching lesbian porn. I’d been doing watching it for a while but I got careless that one day, you know? So then my parents had a long talk with me and sent me to conversion therapy and all that shit,” Shangela took a pause, her eyes beginning to water. She hated the fact that she was about to cry like a baby in front of Dela, but she’d seen the other girl in that state before so she felt less embarrassed.

“Oh no, you poor thing.” Dela immediately engulfed her in a tight hug. “What happened after, since obviously conversion therapy isn’t a scientifically proven way to become straight?”

“I faked that it worked for a while, but last year they caught me kissing a girl and that was their final straw. They kicked me out and I haven’t spoken to any of my family in about a year.” Tears stained Shangela’s cheeks as she thought of her family; all the good memories that made her wish this all hadn’t happened. She really did love and miss her family, but she would have been even more miserable staying in the closet but being with them.

Dela could feel her adrenaline spike as she heard Shangela tell her that she was gay. “I’m gay too and my parents didn’t react well either when I came out. They told me to never talk about it again or they would throw me in the streets. I know exactly how you feel, there’s just so much hate and ignorance in this world, it sucks.”

Shangela couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief pass through her body as Dela told her that she was in the closet as well, and how she didn’t just get up and leave. Of course Dela wouldn’t do the latter - she knew the girl well enough by now to know that she doesn’t judge a soul - and she honestly wasn’t expecting her to tell her that she was gay as well.

“We really are the same, aren’t we?” Dela laughed, punching her arm lightly.

“Now I can send you pictures of girls that I think are hot,” Dela told her, winking.

Shangela couldn’t help but smile as she saw her wink. It gave shy, cunning, and flirty all at once.

Maybe it means something… maybe it doesn’t.

“Cmon girl, we all know I’m the standard of beauty.”

“Wow, society’s standards are that low?” Shangela’s mouth gaped at Dela’s answer, the once silent room filling with laughs and guffaws.

“Fucking bitch. Let’s get started with this bio project and make it good so we don’t hear Smith lecturing our asses on how we’ll fail the AP test.” Shangela couldn’t thank Dela enough for brightening up the mood, but now it was time to come up with a project worthy of at least a passing grade.

“Boo,” Dela pouted, sighing as she went to get her laptop.

“Hurry back quick so we can start baby.”

Dela was now incredibly grateful she had her back turned to Shangela so she couldn’t see how much that nickname made her blush. She returned, both laptop and her bio binder in hand and sat on the bed once more, Shangela having wiped her face of the tear-stained foundation and runny mascara and eyeliner from crying, yet chose to reapply her red lipstick. Dela couldn’t help but notice how good of a color red was on her.

“I like that lipstick shade on you, it looks so beautiful.” Dela had been pulling up the rubric to see exactly what they had to accomplish - and of course they got the project focusing on sex cells.

“Thank you darling, maybe I’ll give it to you one day,” Shangela spoke, wrapping her arm around Dela’s waist and looking on with her at the screen. Was that flirtation in her voice? No - couldn’t be, probably just meant she’d buy it for her birthday or something. The arm was an innocent gesture but she couldn’t help but feel her heart burst from it. Oh god, why was she getting so enamored by Shangela all of a sudden? She’d always acted this way around her - it meant nothing one way or the other, right?

What was this girl doing to her?

Dela couldn’t say anything else besides, “Let’s get this started.”

And so they did.

—————————————————

“Dela? Earth to Dela?” Jinkx waved a hand in front of Dela’s face, who’d been staring at her locker for the past five minutes. Dela immediately sprung back to life, twisting the combination.

“Sorry, lot on my mind right now. You have time to talk?” She shoved several books in and slammed the locker shut with her foot.

“Sure do. Let’s walk to the coffee shop, you can talk to me about your issues throughout the journey,” the redhead replied, tapping the top of Dela’s head. Dela couldn’t help but notice Shangela walk right by the two of them as they neared the front door. She winked at Dela, then began heading toward the gym, presumably for cheer practice.

Jinkx had noticed as well, and gave Shangela a confused look to her back. Nonetheless, they walked out together and Dela began the long process of explaining everything happening to her to Jinkx.

“So basically I wanna tell you something she told me the other day but promise you won’t tell anyone about it? Like, ever since I’ve known this I’ve been feeling weird things towards her and I don’t know why.”

“My lips are sealed doll.” The two decided to sit down on a bench in the park, which happened to be right by the café they’d been headed to. The ginger played with the rips in her jeans, still looking at Dela, fully alert.

Dela whispered so that nobody besides the two of them could hear. “We came out to each other. I’m only whispering in case she isn’t out yet.” Her voice leveled to a normal speaking voice. “Now I feel like everything she does is flirty, and I don’t know if I’m just being too hopeful or there might be something there.”

“What sorts of things are making you think she might like you?”

“She calls me these really sweet nicknames and I blush every time she calls me them. Like she calls me baby and darling all the time and I haven’t heard her say my actual name since the first day we met.”

Jinkx’s fingers moved onto scraping the black nail polish she had on. “Hmmm, that’s tricky because a lot of people do that sort of nickname thing with close friends. I mean, I do it to you on the daily. Buttt, it can be a sign. Give me the rundown on the rest.”

Dela began to count off with her fingers as she recited. “She gets kinda touchy with me, she’s always in the mood to hang out with me, I told her how nice her lipstick looked on her and she said she’d give it to me and I don’t know whether it’s a pass or not, you know?” She got frustrated with herself as she realized that her potential signs just sounded like Shangela being a good friend, which of course she was. “It’s so hard to explain, but I just feel like she does.”

“I bet you there’s one very obvious sign that you’ve forgotten. Think Dela, think,” Jinkx persuaded her, knowing there’s got to be one key factor to making the final verdict.

Dela hesitated for a moment, before speaking. “I mean, she’s cried in front of me, but I don’t think that’s a sign? I know she’s not known for crying but that didn’t seem like a sign to me, maybe it is.”

Jinkx’s eyes widened. “Oh no honey, she loves you. Shangela hasn’t cried in front of anyone in this school since pre-k. Which I commend her for, I can’t go for even a month without crying.” Dela felt her heartbeat speed up. “But the question is, do you like her? And I already know the answer to that, you do. Make a move on her before she thinks you’re not interested. That probably won’t end pretty.”

“You support me being with her?” Dela almost felt the eyeroll Jinkx gave her in response.

“As long as you’re happy with it, I don’t give a shit you do. But mark my words, if Shangela Wadley ever even thinks of hurting you, I will make sure she gets it.” Dela smiled, hugging her.

“Thanks dude.”

“No problem, I love being the third wheel,” Jinkx spoke, sarcastic. “You can get your girl after we finish this shift.”

Dela sighed, annoyed, as she’d forgotten completely about their shift. “Three hours of hell and I can go over to her house.”

The two got up and began heading toward the coffee shop, where they both worked. “What’re you gonna do there with her?”

“I’m addicted to Game of Thrones thanks to her now, so we planned on watching it for a movie night. Maybe a special topic will be brought up.” Dela looked at Jinkx and wiggled her eyebrows.

“Ah yes, that topic being on the role of the nucleus in a cell?”

“Sure,” Dela rolled her eyes as Jinkx laughed, both reaching the glass entrance door of the coffee shop simultaneously.

“You’re so in love.”

—————————————————

“Hey girl!” Shangela greeted Dela in pajama pants and a t-shirt, hair up in a bun. Her look may be seen as lazy and boring to others, but Dela saw her looking equally beautiful as she did all made up. Shangela enveloped Dela in a hug.

“Hi Shangie!” Dela’s hair was wet and cold against Shangela’s scalp - she’d probably just washed it - and Shangela didn’t care one bit. It was unlike her and she knew that - cold wet hair was her worst enemy.

Everything is appealing when it’s done by the one you love, isn’t it? Shangela shook that thought out of her head. It was time to accept the fact that Dela had no feelings for her in that way and just thought of her as a close friend. The thought of that pained her, but she felt like it was obvious at this point. Dela probably would have made a move on her by now if she liked her, as Shangela thought her flirting made it clear that Shangela liked the other girl.

God, she really needed to get out of her head for a second, didn’t she?

“Hey girl, need help with your stuff?” Shangela asked, noticing Dela carrying a bag with night clothes, which appeared to be rather heavy. Dela shook her head in refusal, but her eyes glimmered, thanking her for the offer.

“Can I leave this in your room?” Shangela waved her off, giving the signal to do whatever the hell she wanted. Dela ran across the living room to the bedroom, plopping the bag on her bed before coming back to the couch where Shangela was sitting, curled up in a blanket. “How rude of you to not give me one too.” Shangela laughed.

“Girl please. Go steal one from my room.” And so she did.

Dela returned with a blue blanket, with the pattern being the phrase ‘Halleloo!’ written all over it. “The most Shangela one I could find,” Dela mumbled while curling herself into a ball with the blanket, her head lying on top of Shangela’s lap purposely as the two sat on the couch. The blanket smelled like her too, and Dela couldn’t get enough.

Shangela ruffled Dela’s hair, smiling at the girl. “Excellent choice dear. Let’s watch this shit now.” Dela wooed in response.

For the next hour or so, the two girls stared at the screen, Shangela making remarks on how she was literally Daenerys or how she was the mother of the dragons. Dela would just smile in response, enjoying the sweet moment as Shangela gently stroked her hair, treating her with care and caution. The tension between the two was clearly thick to anyone but them. After a second episode had concluded, Dela flipped her body around so she was facing Shangela, but her head still in her lap. Shangela looked at her confusingly, the movement drawing her attention away from the credits.

“I wanna ask you something,” Dela said, looking up into Shangela’s eyes, who at this point had retracted her hand from the other.

“What’s up?”

“Do you like anyone?” Um, duh, is what Shangela wanted to say, but she couldn’t bring herself to be that brash. Hesitation evident, she eventually responded.

“Mhm.”

“Cool, I do too.” That phrase had sunk any hopes Shangela had of Dela liking her, and all she wanted to do was cry. “Let’s play a game.”

Shangela raised her eyebrows at her. “A game? What do you mean?”

“Like,” Dela paused for a moment to collect her thoughts before sitting up, “We each reveal one characteristic of the person we like so we can guess who the other likes. We say 5 qualities and at the end we have to guess.”

Fuck it, why not? “You go first darling.”

“Sure.” Dela was happy yet extremely nervous, wondering if her plan would blow over. “She has blonde hair.”

“What a specific quality.” Dela smirked. “She has black hair.

Dela thought for a moment before saying the next trait. “Her first name is eight letters long.” Shangela raised an eyebrow at her. Ok work, she thought. Shangela barely knew how to spell her own name, let alone the number of letters in it.

“Hers is four letters long.” Dela wanted to gape, but knew she couldn’t. Who else had black hair and a four letter name?

“Hmmm, she’s a cheerleader. A pretty good one at that.” Shangela was almost positive she could hear her heart pounding out of her chest when Dela said that. It’s gotta be her, there was literally no other person in the school it could be.

Shangela thought for a moment before saying the next hint. This could either blow up in her face or make her the happiest person in the world. “She was crying in the bathroom about finals one day and I helped her out.” Shangela both couldn’t wait to see Dela’s reaction and feared it.

She felt Dela’s hand graze hers, and was petrified as Dela hadn’t responded right away. Dela’s other hand brushed the curly blonde hair out of her face and stroked her cheek lightly.

“It’s me huh?” Dela asked her in a faint voice. Shangela wanted to roll her eyes so hard at that question. No, it’s the fucking Pope.

“Mhm, if you don’t feel the same I’ll never mention this aga-” Shangela had been cut off by Dela pressing her lips against her own. Her body had tensed up immediately before relaxing into the kiss, wrapping her arms around Dela. Everything felt right. Dela’s lips were warm and so soft, and her thumb continued stroking Shangela’s cheek as the two shared the first out of many tender moments.

Dela broke it, tears welling up in her eyes as she realized the reality of this. This girl loved her. She vowed to herself to treat her like a goddess, as she deserved nothing less than that.

“It’s so early but I want to let you know that I love you, and I have for the past couple of months. You’ve made my life so much better and I feel genuinely happy whenever I’m around you, it’s not the fake kind that I give to most of the people in school,” Dela didn’t look Shangela in the eyes speaking this, focusing on chipping the nail polish on her fingers. Shangela tightened her grip on Dela, rubbing her back with her hand lightly and stroking through her hair with the other.

“Same here baby. I love you so much, and I hope you know that. You bring out the best in me.” Dela gave her that smile - that beautiful fucking smile that she loved so much - and buried her face into Shangela’s shoulder.

“I can’t believe it took us so long to admit it to each other,” Dela said, breaking the silence they’d had momentarily. Shangela leaned in to give her another warm peck on the lips before agreeing with her.

“Whatever, we have each other now and I can shower you in love.” Dela smiled against the skin on Shangela’s shoulder.

“Sounds great.”

Shangela turned off the TV, lifting the girl still wrapped in her blanket as she shuffled her way to her bedroom, still wearing hers. Dela kisses the same spot on her cheek repeatedly throughout the short journey, and let out a whine when Shangela released her from her grip, leaving her on the bed under the covers. She removed the blankets from their bodies and discarded them haphazardly across her room. Shangela joined her in the bed, Dela snuggling up against her warm body as Shangela hugged her tight, pressing a kiss into her neck before beginning to doze off.

As they began to fall asleep, they were over the moon as they were finally able to lie in bed with the one they loved.

—————————————————

After that weekend, they made a promise to each other to not keep it a secret. Of course, not rub it in everyone’s faces, but to not avoid little things like holding each other’s hands in the halls or sneaking kisses when nobody was looking (or so they thought).

That Monday morning, Jinkx was all but shocked seeing the new couple hugging in front of Dela’s locker, which wasn’t too far from Jinkx’s. She smirked at Dela, mouthing 'I told you so!’ before being waved off by a flip of the middle finger by Dela.

Eventually, the two had to part, as they had different home rooms. Their different classes didn’t stop them from all their thoughts being consumed by one another.

Lunch time rolled around, and Dela was thoroughly surprised when she saw a particular girl with winged eyeliner and red lipstick coming her way. “Oh look who decided to join me for once?” She spoke teasingly, Shangela rolling her eyes.

Shangela sat next to her. “I don’t give a fuck about my old 'friend’ group anymore.” Shangela said, emphasizing the word friend with finger quotation marks. “I have you and I really don’t care what they have to say about me anymore.” Dela looked lovingly into Shangela’s eyes before pressing her lips against hers. People were probably staring but they didn’t care - let them stare.

They pulled apart way too quickly for either of their likings, but neither girl wanted to get in trouble by the staff. Dela’s lips had become a faint red from her lipstick and Shangela loved the way it looked on her more than anything.

“I’m getting you to wear red lipstick soon, it looks so nice on you.” At this moment, Jinkx and the rest of Dela’s small friend group had joined the table, everyone but the three who knew gaped at the situation. Shangela simply smiled and greeted them all warmly, getting to know the rest of Dela’s friends. Some of the popular group that had been used to Shangela being with them had caught notice of the situation.

“The fuck is she doing?” Violet questioned to Ginger and Manila, confused as hell as to why Shangela was hanging out with new people, much less why she was getting all touchy with a band nerd - Dela. “What’s gonna happen to the cheer team now?”

Both girls were about to agree with her when a voice came up behind them. “I’m fine with it. She looks really happy.” Manila turned her head to see who was speaking.

It was Raja.

“But-” Ginger began to speak before Raja shut her down.

“Honey she’s never looked happier than she does right now. Let her live. Shangela’s staying on the team, she told me.”

The trio nodded their heads reluctantly, continuing to watch the scene a bit more before turning back to their table.

Despite attempting to focus her attention on the new girls, Shangela’s mind and eyes would always go back to Dela. She couldn’t help herself, and Dela winked at her when the period was close to being over, letting her head rest on Shangela’s shoulder and wrapping an arm around her waist. Shangela looked at her, her heart being warmed as Dela’s beautiful blue eyes sparkled and glittered at her. She was perfect.

“You guys are so fucking cute,” Aja said. The whole table noticed the scene occurring when Aja had pointed it out and began squealing. Dela’s face flushed with embarrassment, but Shangela, being the girl she was, leaned in to kiss her. The squeals turned into 'aw’s and they pulled apart at the exact moment the bell rang.

Although they had to part ways since they didn’t share their last two classes together, Shangela followed her to the band room, not caring if she was late. Dela refused to let her but Shangela was resilient.

As they turned a corner, Dela mumbled, “I love you,” into Shangela’s ear. The shorter of the two whispered the same thing back, and there they were at Dela’s stop.

“So movie date tonight?” Shangela asked her. The two didn’t have plans but fuck it, why not make some?

“By movie you mean Game of Thrones? Of course. I’m surprised you’re not sick of me after being around me literally twenty-four seven.”

“I could never get sick of you, you stole my cold dead heart. Now go in before your teacher yells at you.” Shangela stood on her tippy toes, pressing a kiss into Dela’s hair before running off before she was insanely late. Dela’s face had a bright smile plastered on it, her heart warm and full.

She was perfect.

[not-so-correct-rpdr-quotes]

Shangela: Dumbest scar stories, go!

Bebe: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.

Morgan: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.

Dela: See this little scar on my arm? I got that when Jinkx dug her nails into my arm during a sad movie.

Thorgy: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.

Chi Chi: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn.

Aja: I have a few scars on my arm from crashing my skateboard.

Trixie:

Trixie: I have emotional scars.

[pichitinha]

lmao you really think trixie's been delivering winner material?

I’m sure you did not expect a full dissertation on this anon but you’re gonna get one bc 1) I don’t know how to do anything casually, 2) I don’t know how to summarise anything, 3) I have lots and lots of opinions about this and it’s about time I share (long long post by a Trixie stan below the cut - there may be spoilers)

Ok, so, first and foremost, I don’t mean to say with this that Trixie is the best competitor to ever grace the main stage of rpdr nor that she’s been the best one on as3 or even that she deserves to win (more than the others). At the end of the day drag is art and art is subjective to taste so you might not agree with me (I know several people who don’t, and that’s ok). But I do feel that the argument of “X person won more challenges” or whatever gets kind of lost if we as fans ignore the fact that oftentimes Rupaul is just plain wrong in her decisions or that her decisions are based on factors that we might not agree. So person A having won more weeks than person B doesn’t necessarily mean that A did a better job (especially here where winning is not only related to the challenge, but also a lipsync). But anyway, here’s my analysis/opinion on Trixie week by week, followed by a little bit more “ranting”:

Week 1 - All-Star Variety Show

You may disagree, anon, but for me her performance was one of the best of the night. I think everyone did well - even Milk, honestly, I thought it was creative - but unlike AS2 where the variety was actually present, AS3 brought a lot of the same and by the third dance number I was kinda bored. So, yes, I found it refreshing when Thorgy was playing and when Trixie was singing. It was a talent show, and Trixie brought in her brand on her clothing, wrote a song, played a song and sang the song. So, yes, for me she absolutely slayed this challenge, and while I would not have given her Top 2, I would have given her High.

Week 2 - Divas Lip Sync Live

We can all agree that this whole episode’s final rank was a fucking joke and while this post is about Trixie I do need to vent my frustration about Chi Chi delivering a Top 2 performance and somehow getting a Bottom position. But anyway. Were the parts equally opportunistic? No. Was Dolly sort of a “winning” part for Trixie? Yes. But so were Dela’s and Shangie’s and they were top. Granted, Trixie was expected to deliver as Dolly, but she wasn’t the only one and she did what we expected and she was really good. So, again, not a Top 2, but a High for me.

Week 3 - The B*tchelor

Yes I am a Trixie stan who is fucking bitter about this. Even though Trixie’s chance was sort of pulled down by Milk she still managed to deliver an excellent performance, the guest himself said that when she managed to get her jokes in, every single one was funny and well thought out. Kennedy and Dela killed this challenge, granted, but had Trixie had her real chance with a real partnet, she’d have been serious competition and the decision to the top 2 would have been harder. Not a Top 2 again, but a High.

Week 4 - All Stars Snatch Game

All right I’ll give you this one, she flew too close to the sun and she burned her wings but we love her anyway everyone stumbles once in a while xoxo. No, but really, this week is important in this bc I saw several people saying she deserved to go bc “she’d been mediocre and then she fell to bad”. She had not been mediocre!!! You don’t have to like Trixie but you cannot disregard that she was good the previous weeks! She delivered exactly what was expected on her own Trixie style in a funny/good way. She went from good to bad this week and that’s the god honest truth. But I’ll give it to you: bottom 2.

Week 5 - Pop Art Ball

My girl killed it and that’s it goodnight. Top 2.

Week 6 - Handmaids to Kitty Girls

Uh, Bebe winning that……… ok. I’m just gonna leave it at that saying that Trixie was great, her lyrics were good, her delivery was great, and she was fucking funny to Adam Lambert who seems to have forgotten his sense of humor at home. Point is Trixie was actually really good and I would have given her Top 2.

Week 7 - My Best Squirrelfriend’s Dragsmaids Wedding Trip

She and Shangela saved this episode with their performances and she deserved what she got. Top 2.

Overall - Looks

I needed to add this at the end instead of commenting every week because for me every single one of Trixie’s runway looks have been amazing. Snatch game? That look made me forget she’d been bad (until she started crying and then I started crying and then we were all crying Brenda). And I do want to point out the second week where she changed her entire make-up for the Dolly look, still resembled herself while not being fully Trixie, and then did a Trixie mug for the runway. Fucking legend.

Conclusion

Anyway anon, you probably gave up already, but now this is much more of a personal rant than an answer I guess. I saw many people disregarding Trixie’s performance so far saying she was “mediocre” as I pointed before and whatnot while using wikipedia’s graph of ranking (bottom, low, safe, high, top) to measure that, and my point here is that not getting praise from the judges doesn’t necessarily mean she didn’t do well bc we all know Ru is going crazier by the day. I’d give (as you saw above): high, high, high, bottom, top, top, top. That, for me, is delivering winner material. More than the others? Maybe not. More than Dela had she not left? No. But good, quality, winner material nonetheless.

So that’s it thanks for coming to my ted talk I love Tracey Martel bye.

[shit-villagers-say]

Ok we COULD talk about the Trixie x Shangela drama from the clip OR

WE CAN TALK ABOUT DELA

Coming in dancing with Shangela? CUTE

The moment where she looked into Chi Chi' s eyes and honestly told her why she picked her? HONEST (finally)

Her gushing about who Paul Lynde was to Kennedy after Kennedy was cupping her face? SWEET

[movingsharts]

Okay. The obvious thing : Top 5 drag queens? And lip syncs?

hi! i just did my top 10 rpdr queens but my top 5 were 1. trixie and katya and no one can make me choose2. adore delano3. the vixen (bc i just saw her on thurs night and she snatched my wig tf off)4. pearl5. aquariahonestly typing just the top 5 made me really consider my ranking though lmao honorable mentions to willam and alyssa edwards ok not sure if aquaria deserves to be that high.top 5 lipsyncs 1. alyssa edwards vs tatiana on AS22.  dela vs aja in AS3 (anaconda)3. shangela vs trixie on AS3 (freaky money)4. monet x change vs dusty ray5. adore vs trinity k bonet on S6

[artificialqueens]

Maybe We’re Helping Each Other Escape (Bengela)- Ortega

A/N: it’s crazy how fast i can work on something if the idea niggles away at me for long enough, i do much of my writing on google docs on train journeys, and i have three days off work because of the bastarding snow. welcome to whatever this is- technically it’s set within the Just The Game We’re In universe but i have tried my best to make sure it can be read standalone. i’m no good at summaries, so this was based off the idea i had the other day when i got asked about Game headcanons:

“i don’t think i’ve given Dela a role in Game so far so OF COURSE she’s the new flirty intern at the Daily Mail who gets put under Shangela’s wing and who makes Shangela very nervous because she works for the Daily Mail and she should not be having these feelings towards female colleagues”

((if you’re American and struggling with the whole idea of the Daily Mail as a newspaper, compare it to ummmmmm idk some media outlet that Trump really loves))

Shangela never thought her journalistic career would peak with her writing a 1,000 word article about the Prime Minister’s wife’s cankles, but she supposed the only way was up. Finishing the final sentence and emailing it to her senior editor to get it haphazardly checked for spelling, grammar and rogue left-wing views, Shangela took a sip of her coffee only to find it cold. Damn. She was annoyed that there were no young, terrified work experience girls to get her another. Rising from her desk chair, she grabbed her cup and made her way to the small office kitchen. Many of her friends had asked her why she took the job at the Daily Mail and she’d often reply lightheartedly, laughing something about being broke and having no morals. But as she passed by desk after desk in the small, stifled office she worked in, she found her heart sinking as it did every other day. The part about her being broke, there was truth in that- there wasn’t a whole lot that a third in Communication, Media and Culture from Oxford Brookes could get you in the world of journalism. She’d had her sights set on the BBC, but that had been for the Raja Geminis of this world, and Shangela still bristled when she saw her on the ten o'clock news remembering how the girl had befriended her for her study notes when they were in first year together. She now understood how brutal the industry could be and how easy it was to be backstabbed, but at the time eighteen-year-old Shangela just thought she’d made a friend. That was until the head of her faculty called her into a meeting to discuss plagarism allegations, and revealed that her final essay had been very similar, almost identical in fact, to Raja’s, the very same essay that Shangela had sent to her to look over to help her out. Raja’s had just been “more finessed” as they had put it. In the end, Shangela’s essay was void- 0% for an essay worth 80% of her grade for that module, dragging her down from being on course for a first class degree to having to settle for a third.   BBC out the window, Shangela had set her sights on ITV, Channel 4, fuck, even Channel 5 received an application. Hearing nothing back she’d started to lower her expectations and set her sights on print journalism- The Times, The Telegraph, The Guardian. Then once she got the rejection emails from them, she begrudgingly scraped the very bottom of the barrel- The Sun, The Star, and The Daily Mail. She got a job offer from the lesser of three evils- as an editor for the section of the website dedicated to women, “Femail”- and before she knew it, she’d been trapped in the same pink offices for two years. But it was better than sitting in a freezing cold Soho flat struggling to pay the rent. Morals, though, that was still a problem. No amount of money could buy those away, and it still stung whenever she had to write an article about whose dress looked the most like a dehydrated camel’s turd at whatever awards ceremony. She’d love to be writing on the situation in Gaza and she’d love even more to be researching the emerging refugee crisis in Syria, but that was Raja’s domain. Shangela’s domain was different entirely. At least she was writing, she reminded herself, as she got to the small kitchen, washed out her mug and spooned in more coffee granules. Flicking the switch on the kettle, she was surprised when her senior editor entered the kitchen, looking as smug as he always did as if he was constantly being reminded of the gender pay gap. In his hand he held what Shangela recognised as her article- same paragraph structure and indents, but with a green highlighter across one sentence. Stiffening, she struggled to hold in her annoyance- that had to be a record for most skim-read proofreading of all time, and it hadn’t even been as much as five minutes since she had emailed the article to him. “So um, Shangie…babe. The article’s brilliant. Just a little problem with your grammar on paragraph two.” Trying to suppress her rolled eyes at the nickname she hated, Shangela examined the highlighted text on the printed sheet in front of her. Narrowing her eyes, she looked up at her editor. “Um. What’s the issue here?” Her boss took the paper from her and read from it in faux-patience. “From beneath the ankle strap, the fat gained from the baby weight four years ago tried to escape from its fleshy prison.” Cringing, Shangela screwed up her face. “And?” “You missed the apostrophe in ‘it’s’.” “No I didn’t,” Shangela explained calmly. “An apostrophe in this case means that two words have been combined to make one. ’It is’ becomes 'it’s’. Its with no apostrophe is possessive. So, “from it is fleshy prison” makes no sense.” The editor gave a sort of choked laugh. “They really taught you a lot at Oxford Brookes, huh?” Shangela found herself casting her eyes to the floor. Her skin prickled as if she’d been stung. Working up her dignity again, she met her boss’ eye. “I do pride myself on knowing basic grammar, Sir.” The senior editor slid the piece of paper slowly out of her hands. “Well I’m your superior and I’m saying that your basic grammar is wrong. So just fix that up and the article should be good to go. Okay?” Shangela simply gave a curt nod, swallowed, and returned to her desk. The Prime Minister’s wife was a lovely woman, too. It was unfair that she had to be eviscerated by the media like this, for something as shallow as her appearance. But it was in Shangela’s job description, and so it would be done.

Settling down at her desk and resentfully changing correct grammar to an error, she felt her eyes flicker above the monitor screen to see some sort of activity in the office. Gia from Fashion was showing around a girl- looking to be around Shangela’s age, or perhaps younger. Her hair was in a neat beehive which fell over her shoulders, long and straight and dark with a sort of gloss to it that Shangela thought only existed in Pantene adverts. Her makeup was simple- a sort of 60’s cat eye with some light blusher and simple pink lipgloss on her lips which were currently set in a smile as she greeted Delta who sat one row in front of her. She wore a pink dress patterned with yellow flowers, and Shangela wondered why she was bothering to notice so much about her. Narrowing her eyes, she swirled her chair around to her left to face Vivienne, the colleague at the desk beside her and possibly the only person Shangela got on with at work.

“Vivienne,” she hissed in a sort of hushed whisper, causing the other girl to turn from whatever she had been working on and flip her hair over her shoulder to listen. “Who is that that Gia’s showing around?”

The other girl rolled her eyes. “Some new intern they got. Journalism graduate apparently. I’m not convinced as to her authenticity. Look at how she’s going round the office. I’ve never seen anyone smile that much.”

“Well it’s the right attitude to have if you want to be a journalist. Be equally fake to everyone,” Shangela considered, shrugging slightly as she watched the girl. Vivienne was right- she hadn’t once broken her smile since Shangela had set eyes on her, which she found intriguing. Watching Gia turn and face her way, Shangela got a shock as if she’d been caught doing something she shouldn’t. Trying to focus on her article, she blocked out her peripheral vision until the two women were right beside her desk.

“Shangela,” Gia’s voice forced Shangela to acknowledge them. “I’d like you to meet Dela, she’s our new intern and she’ll be staying with us for a couple of months.”

Shangela cast her gaze up to meet the perfectly lined pair of blue eyes smiling back at her. Up close, the girl was relatively pretty, but she couldn’t shake the annoyance of having someone just waltz into an internship right after they graduated meanwhile she had to practically beg the Daily Mail to give her a job. Swallowing her slight jealousy, Shangela forced a smile.

“Nice to meet you,” she offered a hand for the other girl to shake, only to be taken aback by her enthusiastically strong grip.

“It’s so good to meet you too! I’ve heard lots about you and read so much of your work. It’s a real honour getting to work beside you!” the girl gushed, the blush on her cheeks going a little pinker as she let go of Shangela’s hand. Shangela felt like blushing herself, taken aback that the girl seemed to have done her research so thoroughly. “Well I’m not exactly sure how much of an honour it is getting to work alongside the author of that show stopping article Floral Shirts to Work- A Yes or a No?, but I’m sure you’ll take something from it.”

Something inside Shangela lit up when Dela responded with a snort and a small giggle concealed under her hand. Gia, however, was not as easy-going and just stared Shangela down with an unimpressed glare. Great. That was a disciplinary on the cards, clearly.

“Well, by the by, since Jackie isn’t coming back from maternity leave anytime soon I said it would be fine if Dela had her desk, meaning she’ll be working beside you and Vivienne. That all okay?”

The resentment tipped over inside Shangela’s stomach again out of nowhere, Dela suddenly feeling like new competition for her. She couldn’t give anything away though, so she simply smiled and nodded.

“Good. I’ll leave you to it- I’ve given Dela a login and email address as well as some articles to proofread, but if she has any questions I trust you’ll handle them?”

Shangela bit her tongue and restrained herself from saying something about having an intern palmed off onto her, but again just nodded. Gia said a polite goodbye to Dela and then flounced off, Shangela’s face immediately setting into a scowl as she left.

“Have fun guarding the gates of Hades,” she muttered, unwittingly loud enough for Dela to hear and laugh.

“You’re a funny one, Angela. I think we’ll get along just fine,” she smiled, Shangela instantly annoyed at the misconception of her name.

“Shangela. We’ll get along even better if you get my name right,” she deadpanned, the other girl just blushing slightly and laughing apologetically.

“My bad. Sorry. Lots to take in, you know?”

Shangela raised an eyebrow and smiled briefly, although she couldn’t help but feel her defences were being worn down by Dela’s constant cheerful demeanor. Looking at her full coffee cup and then at the annoyingly smiley girl, a sly thought took place in her mind- power play. There was no way that Shangela was having this intern see herself on the same plane as herself.

“Hey, Dela? I’ve got a job for you,” she smiled, injecting cheer into her voice and feeling momentarily guilty at the way the other girl whizzed round in her wheely chair, eagerness painted over her face.

“Sure!”

“Would you mind possibly getting me a coffee?”

Dela’s smile faltered slightly as she gestured to the preexisting cup on Shangela’s desk. “Absolutely! But, um…you do already have one?”

Shangela kept her smile level as she gave a throwaway glance at the cup. “Yep, got that. Registered that. I’d just love another- long day, and I need a lot of caffeine to get me through it, you know?”

Still slightly confused, Dela nodded and dutifully made her way towards the kitchen. Turning back to her screen, Shangela smiled. She had one up on her now, and she would now know who was in charge.

Something that felt like guilt seemed to poke at her stomach, but later she’d conclude that it was probably just down to the fact she’d skipped breakfast that morning.

***

As the weeks went by, Shangela couldn’t work out if Dela was slowly growing on her or trying to annoy her to death. It started with the mornings- Shangela would walk into the office to find that yes, Dela was still there and no, unfortunately she hadn’t been taken out by a passing truck on the way into work. The intern would flash her a beaming smile, give her a cheerful good morning, and then, Shangela had noticed, would proceed to give her a different compliment every day. Sometimes it would be her makeup, sometimes her perfume, sometimes her hair or clothes. She couldn’t work out if the girl was a fake bitch or just aggressively nice, but the main thing that stumped her was why she was always so chirpy in the mornings. By about halfway through week two, Shangela snapped and decided to ask her.

“Is there a reason why you’re always so damn bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at 8am?” she borderline hissed, glaring at her. Dela sort of shrugged apologetically and then pointed to a bright pink keep cup.

“…coffee?” she guessed, then lifted up the keep cup and gave it a little shake. “In fact I’m almost out. Can I get you any?”

As Shangela shrugged off her coat and made to sit down at her computer, she found herself giving Dela a look. She’d just admittedly been pretty rude to her, and here she was offering her a coffee. Surely the girl had to be a droid or some shit? Holding her gaze and noticing again how blue her eyes were, Shangela simply nodded and held out her cup. Dela smiled back.

“Black, two sugars, right?” she asked, pausing for a second. It had been weird that she’d remembered that as well, but then Shangela supposed she did make her a coffee every day. Then it had occurred to her that the only time she’d ever had to ask Dela for one was that first day, and ever since then the girl had offered. Not really completely sure how to address the information that had just registered with her, she only nodded again. Dela gave a little nod back and made to walk away, before looking at her again and casually saying, “Your eye makeup’s lovely today, by the way. Really brings out your eyes.”

As the intern walked away, Shangela blinked a little self-consciously and began her work.

It continued the next again week. Shangela had been warming to Dela and, though she tried not to speak to her much during the day, sometimes she’d be subjected to a small anecdote about what her turtles had been up to (she, for some unknown reason, had pet turtles), sometimes she’d have to fix some sort of email or Microsoft Word-related problem for her, and sometimes she’d ask Shangela about her life. When she thought about it, Shangela supposed there wasn’t a whole lot to tell- work basically was her life, that and her Mum.

“So, um. No other half then?” Dela had asked without much expression, Shangela bristling in response.

“I hate that term. ‘Other half’. Like I’m me, I’m not incomplete in some way, you know? It’s stupid,” she rolled her eyes, thoroughly unimpressed. For the first time ever, Dela seemed anything other than bright and upbeat.

“I’ll take that as a no,” she raised her eyebrows and continued typing away. Shangela somehow regretted barking at Dela. By way of extending an olive branch, she turned and faced her.

“What about you, there a man in your life?”

Dela gave an inexplicable snort and shook her head tersely. “Nope. And there won’t be one for a very long time. Possibly ever.”

Shit. Shangela regretted asking even more- Dela had clearly been the victim of a messy breakup and her heart was obviously still broken from some dickhead ex. Clearing her throat, Shangela wanted somehow to make things better. Giving the girl a genuine smile, she gave an apologetic shrug.

“What do you say to keeping the subject off-limits for both of us and pretending this conversation never happened?”

Dela’s smile was suddenly back, and Shangela didn’t know why that made her heart light up, but it did. “I’d like that very much.”

Sure enough, the both of them kept to their word and didn’t bring the topic up again. But Shangela did find herself starting to engage in actual conversation with Dela a lot more often. She’d even venture to say she enjoyed hearing her stories and liked being asked her opinion on things, and it actually turned out they had a few things in common. It was the sort of thing that she was maybe missing out on, having never been able to commit to a boyfriend before. Really, she’d always just been too focused on work, and it was nice to just talk to someone else. She started to look forward to seeing Dela at work, just for the conversation.

Shangela turned up to work one day on a chilly day in September, about a month into Dela’s internship. By this point, she no longer really remembered what had ever annoyed her about Dela and genuinely enjoyed her company. Arriving at her desk, she was disappointed to find an empty chair where Dela usually sat. To her intrigue, however, there was a printed sheet of paper on top of her own keyboard- paragraphs of typed black with pink highlighted words and sections and scribbled notes all over it. Stuck on top of it was a pink sticky note, identical to the post-it notes that sat on Dela’s desk. Shangela picked up the paper and read the note.

About three minutes later she finally found Dela in the kitchen after frantic and furious searching. She’d seemed happy to see Shangela initially, but her face fell when she saw her expression- hot anger flushed against Shangela’s cheeks and her face was set in a scowl as she crushed the paper in her hand.

“What is this?!”

Dela blinked a couple of times, looking first at Shangela and then to the paper in her hand. “Well it’s like I said…I just proofread it and tweaked it a little. I just thought I’d be helping…I’m sorry that you don’t like it-”

Frustrated, Shangela crumpled her own article up into a ball and launched it into the bin. She turned to Dela with dark eyes, all warmth she’d ever felt towards the girl completely gone.

“Don’t ever fuck with my work again, or I’ll make it my business to get your internship cut as short as it possibly can. Got it?” she snapped, earning a sheepish nod from Dela. Fuming, she walked out of the kitchen and out of the office, being unable to bear being in the same building as Dela. She was so annoyed, so angry that a girl on an internship thought she could just waltz in and start editing the articles of someone that had worked there for almost three years. It took her all the way back to university, to her plagarism hearing. Just because Raja had changed a few words her essay was “more finessed”, just as Dela thought she was finessing her article. Shangela didn’t get to where she was today without any talent.

Fuck her, she thought, as she reached Starbucks and ordered herself the most poisonous, inky-black-looking coffee available.

As she sat and sipped at it and looked out the window, though, she felt her own words starting to chip away at her. Had she been too harsh? No- Dela had no business interfering where she didn’t have any right. She said she’d been trying to help. Maybe she genuinely wanted to. With the smallest stab to her heart, Shangela thought back to how kind and happy the girl always seemed. Fake? No- there was no way someone could keep up that charade for that length of time. As time ticked on and her cup became drained, Shangela began to feel more and more as if she’d kicked a puppy. Sighing and rising from her seat, she made her way back to the office. Dela still wasn’t at her seat and Shangela wondered if she’d ever returned. Making her way to the kitchen, she looked in the bin and plucked out the ball of paper. Opening it up, she began to read over her article, looking at the things Dela had written in.

Shit. She’d fucked up.

She hurried along the office in her heels, hoping that Dela was back so she could talk to her. She wasn’t. Mind in overdrive, Shangela went to the second most probable place and found herself at the ladies’ toilets a few moments later. To her horror, she could hear a quiet sniffing coming from the only locked cubicle.

She paused before speaking. “Dela?”

The sniffing stopped abruptly, but there was no sign of the door opening. Sighing, Shangela’s heart sank as she looked at the ceiling. “Look, I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. I was a total asshole.”

She paused. Still nothing. “I read the changes you made. They were really good. It was pretty poorly-written if I’m being honest so, thanks for making it better. And despite what I said, I do appreciate it.”

Another pause with no movement from inside the cubicle. Shangela could almost feel herself getting frustrated again, but she took a deep breath. “Look, can you please just come out of the cubicle so that we can talk, because I’m starting to get nervous that the person in here isn’t actually Dela.”

There was a beat of silence before the lock turned and Dela emerged from the cubicle, her cheeks red and puffy from crying and small specks of mascara dotted around her eyes. Shangela felt like a Grade A shit.

“I’m sorry- I don’t know why I’m crying, I’m such an idiot,” Dela started, her face flushing redder from embarrassment. Shangela shook her head.

“No, don’t be sorry. I’m sorry. For being such a dick.”

Dela smiled sadly. “I guess I just thought I’d made a friend.”

A sudden thud caught in Shangela’s heart. “I mean, I’m not that great at the whole friendship thing on the whole.”

Dela gave a small laugh. “Clearly.”

“But I mean…I guess I could try?” Shangela said hesitantly, earning another smile from Dela. Christ, she was so glad her smile was back.

“We could start with a hug?”

“It’d be a start.”

Returning her smile, Shangela walked forward into Dela’s open arms and wrapped her own arms around her, giving her a little squeeze. She was so glad she’d been forgiven, and felt relieved as she relaxed a little and rested her head on the other girl’s shoulder. She felt inexplicably safe.

The hug was eventually broken. Shangela smiled at Dela and gave her hand a quick squeeze. “Come on, bitch. Tell me more about how shit my writing is.”

As Dela howled with laughed, it occured to Shangela that Dela had been the one to break the hug, and she didn’t know why that bothered her.

***

The next fortnight was filled with what Shangela was overjoyed to find was a real friendship. They messaged outside of work hours, laughed and chatted at work and went for lunch together. Dela just made Shangela happy in ways she couldn’t remember anyone ever doing before. There was a certain element of excitement to it- the butterflies she’d get whenever Dela had sent her a new message, or the anticipation she’d feel walking into work and knowing they’d see each other. It was nice.

Today, though, was a little more nervewracking. Tomorrow she was interviewing a Cabinet Minister, Sharon Needles from the Department of Social Affairs and Citizenship, and she wanted to make sure she was completely prepared. It had been a long time since she’d interviewed anybody. As Shangela arrived in the morning, she vented all of her feelings to Dela.

“You’ll be absolutely fine. You’ve got all your questions, right?” she asked her, Shangela rolling her eyes and gesturing to the editor’s office.

“I’ve got all MY questions. I need to get them vetted from HIM. He’ll probably make me ask all sorts of embarrassing, sexist bullshit.”

Dela laughed then blinked, a little shocked. “Wait, really?”

“Dela, come on, girl. We work for the Daily Mail. Offensive shit is their currency.”

The other girl shrugged in acceptance. “Still, I never thought they’d actually ask people blatant stuff like that.”

“It’s bullshit.”

There was a small pause in which Shangela considered the venom behind her words. Dela seemed to be considering the same thing. “So how come you work here?”

Because I’m broke and I have no morals? Shangela sighed. “Because I couldn’t get a job at any other media outlet and I have no integrity.”

Dela gave a half-hearted laugh as Shangela realised how much more serious she sounded than she’d meant to. Giving a suspicious gaze around the office, Dela then moved her chair closer to Shangela.

“I sort of feel the same. Given the choice, I wouldn’t be working in a newspaper like this. It’s all that accepted me, though, so I have to just go along with the narrative of whatever they want me to write and stick it out until my internship is over.”

Shangela ran her tongue over her teeth. “You and me both, girl.”

Feeling as if the conversation had taken a sort of dark left turn, Shangela inched her chair away slightly and tried to think of a different topic. Seemingly getting the same vibe, Dela smiled and spontaneously took Shangela’s hand.

“Whatever they make you ask her at the interview, I know you’ll nail it. It’s impossible not to like you,” she beamed, giving Shangela’s hand a squeeze then returning to her work without waiting on a response.

Shangela didn’t know why, but she felt disappointed.

That was until about 10 at night when she was getting ready to go to sleep and her phone pinged from her bedside table. Turning rapidly over in bed, Shangela read the message.

D: Good luck for tomorrow! You will be amazing. Anything I can do, phone me xx

And Shangela’s heart was soaring again, and she couldn’t really explain why.

***

The day of the interview arrived, and Shangela woke up full of nervous energy. She was so excited at the thought of getting to interview an actual politician, when the pinnacle of the Daily Mail was usually the latest twat off I’m A Celebrity. The speed of her heart thrumming in her chest only increased when, just as she was about to leave her flat, her phone buzzed with a text from Dela.

D: I’m getting us pastries before work because I know you won’t eat. You can thank me with cocktails after work xx

Shangela couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face as her fingers flew across the screen texting back.

S: Alllllllllright!!! xx

As she hopped onto the tube and made her way to Notting Hill, her anticipation grew and grew wondering what her day would bring.

It turned out the first thing it brought was being practically met at the door by her senior editor, who was holding a small poly pocket with paper inside.

“Good morning, Shangie. You’re looking very lovely this morning,” he smiled nauseatingly. Shangela grimaced at him. She didn’t know why, but she felt as if she’d feel a whole lot better if Dela was with her at this moment. Really, she was the only person Shangela cared to receive compliments from nowadays.

“Thanks,” she replied briefly. “Can I help you?”

“Uh, yeah, these questions for Sharon Needles today…not quite cutting it. We want to reach out to women, not completely alienate them by boring them with politics.”

Shangela narrowed her eyes. “But…she’s a politician. So what else should I ask her about?”

“Things that women want to read about. Her love life! Her fashion! Makeup tips! You know?” the editor laughed, handing the unimpressed girl the poly pocket. “Look, I’ve got some new questions for you. They’re much more suitable for the vibe we’re going for here. No need to thank me!”

Shangela’s heart sank with disappointment as she read the first few questions. “Forgive me if I’m sounding a little naive, but you know that women can actually engage with and understand politics, right?”

The editor gave a smirk. “You write for Femail, Shangie. Not the New Statesman. Know your place.”

With that, he walked away, leaving Shangela standing at the office door and looking blankly at the questions in her hand. She was angry, but most of all she was upset. Her editor was right- although she was an editor too, it was only for the crappy, sexist supplement of a total bigoted mess of a publication. What the fuck was she doing here? Looking through the glass, she could see Dela at her desk working away, and two pastries and a coffee sitting on her own desk. In her emotional state, Shangela felt a lump rising in her throat. She swallowed, cleared her throat then blinked a couple of times before pushing open the door.

“Hey!” Dela smiled up at her, before Shangela watched her face fall as Dela saw the anger painted on her face. “Oh shit, are you alright?”

Shangela wordlessly shook her head and sat down, Dela fixing her with a look of sympathy.

“If it helps, you look really good today?” she offered. For some reason, it did help. Sighing, Shangela tossed the poly pocket onto Dela’s desk.

“Have a read of them,” she said, raising her eyebrows. “That’s the questions my senior editor wants me to ask Sharon Needles later on today.”

As she read, Dela’s eyes grew a little wide. Finishing the first page, she snorted with laughter. “I’m sorry. That’s laughably bad.”

“Right?! I can’t believe I actually have to go in there and ask them,” Shangela sighed, throwing her head back against her chair. She was jolted back to reality when she felt a warm hand rest on her arm, and her eyes flew open to find Dela looking at her.

“Hey. This doesn’t mean that you can’t put yourself across as at total sweetheart, because you are a total sweetheart. Now eat your damn croissant and drink your coffee.”

Once again, Dela seemed to know just what to say to put the smile back on Shangela’s face. “You’re the sweetheart for all of this. Thanks.”

Dela simply looked at the ground bashfully. She could have been blushing- Shangela couldn’t really see from the way her dark hair hung over her face- but if she was being honest, Shangela was blushing a little too. Smiling to herself and reaching forward, she took a sip of the coffee that Dela had bought her.

“Fuck, that’s bitter.”

“Ugh, I told them to put more sugar in it. You sit there, I’ll get you more.”

As Shangela smiled after Dela while she walked to the kitchen, she became aware of somebody’s eyes on her. Turning around in her chair, she saw Vivienne.

“Can I help you?”

Vivienne smiled apologetically, then leaned on her desk. “Shangela. Be careful.”

Shangela blinked. “What?”

“Look, I get that you and Dela have this cute gal pal thing going on, but just…if you don’t want people to talk, then tone it down.”

“Talk? What could they-” Shangela began, but trailed off. Was Vivienne trying to imply that people were thinking that she and Dela were together? Self-conscious, Shangela cast an eye over the office. “Oh, no, that’s really not- there’s nothing going on. I don’t feel…like that. Towards other women.”

Giving her a sympathetic look, Vivienne continued. “What you choose to do in your private life is none of my business, girl, but just…be careful. You work for the Daily Mail. That’s all I’m saying.”  

As Vivienne turned back to her work, Shangela stared at her blank computer screen, a small feeling of sickness taking root in her stomach. She didn’t feel that way about girls. And sure, she got excited to see Dela and always looked forward to the time they spent together and felt happy and warm whenever she texted her, but that was just what friendship was, right?

It wasn’t exactly as if Shangela had anything to compare it to.

Pushing down the slight nausea she was feeling, Shangela powered up her monitor and tried her best to eat some of the pastries that were in front of her. She had nothing to hide, and therefore she had nothing to worry about.

That was until her interview with Sharon Needles was over, and everything basically went to shit. It was like the Murphy’s Law of interviews- everything that could have gone wrong did go wrong: Sharon hated the questions and therefore hated her, dropped the f-bomb and walked out before the interview was even finished. Shangela felt as if she’d blown the whole thing, although her journalistic brain was a little excited at the thought of getting to write an article on something so scandalous. She’d told Dela all about it, the intern’s eyes lighting up with the drama of it all.

“I mean. It wasn’t quite what you wanted, but it’ll make good reading, right?” she reasoned, Shangela giving a smug smile. As she thought back to the interview, she turned to Dela again. She thought a little bit before opening her mouth, thinking about what Vivienne had said before.

“Hey, um. Did you know that Sharon Needles was gay?”

Dela looked down at her desk then brushed a bit of dust off her skirt. “No. Did she mention it in her interview?”

“Yeah. It sort of came up when I asked her that question about if she was seeing anyone.”

Dela gave a contemplative hum, then continued typing. Shangela still felt a little weird.

“And that doesn’t…bother you, no?”

Instantly, Dela looked at her with a screwed-up face. “No? It’s her life, it doesn’t affect me. Come on, Shangela, you know me well enough to know I wouldn’t judge somebody like that.”

Shangela silently nodded. So Dela was accepting and fine, and wouldn’t judge anybody for that sort of thing. Why was she thinking so much about this?

“Do you think it’s something I should put in the article?”

Dela furrowed her brow. “I wouldn’t.”

“But she mentioned it in front of me. Surely that means it’s fine to put out there?”

“People are different with that sort of thing,” Dela said quietly. “Besides, it would depend what context you use it in.”

Shangela looked at the article that was already half-finished on her screen. “I’ll maybe just mention it in passing.”

One hour went by. Shangela submitted the article to her senior editor and before long she was called into his office. He looked disgustingly gleeful, rubbing his hands together and giving the occasional little clap.

“Shangie, this is gold, baby. Amazing work. I’ve contacted the news outlets about the audio and they’re all willing to buy it too. The article is almost perfect but I just think we could add in a little bit more about the whole lesbian thing.”

The pride she’d felt at being complimented suddenly faded rapidly away. “What do you want me to add in?”

“Oh, just some sensationalist language, maybe call her leadership skills into question. You know what lesbians are like, they’re always pushing their own agenda.”

Shangela bristled. She didn’t know why she felt so defensive. “I’m not putting that in the article.”

The editor smiled smugly. “I think you’ll find that if you want to keep your job, you will.”

Heat pricked at Shangela’s cheeks as she felt herself go red. Turning to make her way out of her office, he stopped her suddenly.

“Oh! And I have a great title. I want you to use it. It’s Plug that Dyke.”

Shangela began to feel sick. “Isn’t that word pretty offensive to lesbians?”

Another smirk. “And how would you know that?”  

Looking to the ground, Shangela just opened the office door and made her way back to her desk, her hands shaking a little. She quietly sat down at her desk, opened up her word doc, and carried on editing the article. By the time she was finished it was late, and people were packing up to go home, including Dela.

“Are you still up for cocktails? You know you owe me one,” she gave Shangela a cheeky smile which normally would have made her stomach flip over. Today it flipped over for all the wrong reasons- looking up at Dela she had this horrible feeling in her stomach as if she’d betrayed her in a way. She forced a smile on her face and shook her head sadly.  

“I’m actually not feeling too good at the moment. Can we reschedule?” she asked. It wasn’t really a lie, and she only felt worse when Dela pouted and leant down to give Shangela a hug. Murmuring a goodbye against her hair, Dela grabbed her bag and left the office, leaving Shangela to rot in her own misery.

She was still feeling miserable hours later, at home curled up on her sofa and watching everything unfold on the news. She felt like a terrible person. She’d put her name to all sorts of things that she didn’t believe, but she’d done it before. Why did she feel so terrible this time? Everything from the day gnawed away at her, especially Vivienne’s words. She felt so lost and confused and not in control of anything, and thinking about Dela, which usually made her feel better, suddenly made her feel worse.

What she didn’t expect was for her buzzer to go off and a furious Dela to be standing on her doorstep. Without waiting for an invite from Shangela, she stormed in, standing in the middle of her living room where they’d both been one or twice before for movie nights or dinners.

“What the fuck did you write?” Dela almost whispered, her eyes cold as they pierced into Shangela’s. She, for her part, couldn’t say anything. She looked meekly at the floor and fiddled with a thread on the sweatpants she’d thrown on when she came in from work. Dela snapped her out of it. “Shangela! Why?”

Shangela raised her head slowly to meet Dela’s again. “My editor was telling me to or I’d have been out of a job. I’m sorry, Dela, I had to-”

“Bullshit, you didn’t have to do anything. You didn’t even have to even mention it! Why did you think it was relevant, why the hell did anyone think it was relevant?” Dela hissed, muttering the last part softly in a confused tone as she rubbed the back of her neck. Shangela felt awful.

“I completely fucked up, I know. But I didn’t mean to offend you- I know you said be careful the context you use it in, but…” she trailed off. She couldn’t think of anything else to say. Dela frowned at her.

“You were right when you said you had no integrity, you know that?”

Shangela felt like crying. She couldn’t work out why it felt as if she’d betrayed somebody, but moreover she couldn’t really work out why Dela was so upset.

“Why did you come round if you’re so angry at me?” she asked softly, part of her perhaps seeking the validation and comfort that they were still friends. Dela shook her head and gave a twisted smile.

“I wanted to know why. That was all. I wanted to know why someone I thought I knew, someone I thought was my friend, would write such disgusting things!”

Shangela couldn’t hold it in. Frowning at Dela, she narrowed her eyes. “I get that you’re upset, but I don’t get why you’re this upset? I mean, it’s not as if Sharon Needles is one of your closest friends?”

“Oh my God, Shangela, I’m a lesbian!” Dela raised her voice, tearing her hands through her hair immediately afterwards. She couldn’t look at Shangela. There was only one thing going through Shangela’s mind.

Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit

She’d just ruined their friendship, completely ruined anything she had with Dela because of her own stupid lack of backbone. Instinctively Shangela stepped forward, making to open her arms for a hug, but Dela just drew back, throwing her hands up defensively. Her face was one of heartbreak, and if Shangela had a mirror she could have seen that her face was the exact same. The churning in her stomach was only getting worse, her breathing quickening.

“Anyway. Now that I found out why you’re apparently a raging homophobe, I’ll be going,” Dela said in a sort of choked voice, making for the door. Shangela felt helpless. She couldn’t leave, not now, not while there were so many things she was feeling and thinking, not while her mind was such a mess. She suddenly reached her hand out, grabbing Dela by the wrist and only softening her grip a little once she was sure she was staying.

“Dela, please,” she said softly, her insides churning as she looked at Dela’s eyes, still cold. “Please stay. I’m really sorry, okay? There’s been a lot going on in my head today and…I don’t know how to explain it. I’m really confused and I don’t feel…I don’t feel normal.”

She didn’t know if she imagined it, but Dela’s eyes seemed to soften just a little. Her voice stayed cold. “Go on then. Say whatever it is you’ve got to say.”

“I just-” Shangela cut herself off as she looked at the ceiling. How could she articulate to Dela what she was feeling if she didn’t even know herself? “I don’t know what’s going on with me. Vivienne said something to me earlier and since then…it’s all I’ve been able to think about. Like…we’re friends, right?”

Dela looked away from where she’d previously been looking at Shangela. “Fuck, Shangela, I don’t even know any more-”

“Okay, okay, you’ve got every right to feel that way. But before, we were friends, right?”

Dela gave a non-committal shrug.

“But that’s the thing. Sometimes it didn’t feel like friendship. Sometimes it felt like something…” Shangela felt the heat hit her cheeks as she looked away from Dela, things starting to piece themselves together in her mind. “…more than that. And I’m messed up, and I don’t know what’s going on because I have no idea how the fuck I should feel, and I’m just…all the while I was editing that article to put in all the shitty bits, I felt like I was betraying somebody. Maybe it wasn’t you, maybe it was myself. I might not…be straight.”

Deciding that was probably all she needed to say, she looked back at Dela again. Her expression hadn’t changed, and Shangela felt more embarrassed than ever. She couldn’t quite believe that she’d actually said it out loud, the thing she’d been suspecting but had never wanted to entertain. Holding Shangela’s gaze, Dela finally spoke.      

“Well you know there’s a definite way to find out, right?” she said, her tone level as she took a single step towards Shangela, slid both her arms around her waist and pulled her closer.

And suddenly Dela was kissing her, and her mind fell silent for the first time that day. Something seemed to click into place, something that immediately made her feel calm, as if nothing else mattered. As Dela tangled her fingers in Shangela’s hair, Shangela brought her arms up around the other girl’s neck, one hand cupping her jaw as she deepened the kiss, completely in awe of how soft Dela’s lips were and how absolutely fucking perfect her mouth felt, how all of this felt.

It was all just…right.

Shangela was the one to break the kiss, only because she was desperate to see Dela smile at her again. Sure enough, she had a sort of intoxicated grin on her face, her eyes glazed over as if she was high.

“Fuck, I’ve wanted to do that for about a month and a half,” she smiled languidly, not yet removing her arms from around Shangela’s waist.

Shangela bit her lip shyly. “So…this means I’m gay, right?”

Dela shrugged. “Well, you could be. Could be bi. Could be pan. But I’m happy to stay with you to help you find out. Especially if it means we can do that again.”

Then she scrunched up her face in disgust. “Sorry. That was really cringey, I’ll never say that again.”

Shangela always prided herself on being the total opposite of shy and yet here she was, redder than a fire extinguisher and completely smitten. Dela said she’d stay with her. It was way too early to say if they were together or not- girlfriends, she supposed- but the thought of getting to try and figure out who she was with Dela helping her sounded pretty fucking amazing.

“So…does this mean I’m forgiven?” she asked softly, looking at the other girl from under her lashes. Dela snorted.

“Only if you promise to grow a damn backbone,” she gave Shangela a little squeeze. Laughing, Shangela pulled her in closer and kissed her again, purely because she could.

This time it was Dela who broke the kiss, taking Shangela by the hand and leading her over to the sofa. “We’ve had a shitty day so we’re getting takeaway and you’re showing me this Game of Thrones you keep going on about.”

Happy, Shangela threw herself on the couch and wrapped herself around the other girl, head resting against her shoulder. She was almost content until she drew her head back and gave Dela a questioning glare. “Who pays for the food if it’s two girls?”

Dela simply burst out laughing and shook her head. “Oh, Shangie. You are such a princess it’s adorable.”

She wasn’t really satisfied with her answer, or her nickname, but cuddling closer to Dela she supposed she was satisfied with everything else that was happening right now.

***

Shangela awoke on the sofa at 6am. Her alarm hadn’t been set until 7.15, but the light from a streetlamp was streaming through the curtains, nearly blinding against the dark October sky. Although her neck hurt from her night on the sofa, she didn’t really mind- Dela was there behind her, her face nuzzled against Shangela’s neck and her body warm despite the thin blanket they’d pulled over themselves doing nothing to protect from the cold. Ordinarily, Shangela would have gone back to sleep, but there was something running through her mind that was preventing her. Dela had been so kind and so forgiving, and Shangela had hurt her badly. She needed to fix things somehow.

Gently sitting up, she reached under the sofa and retrieved her Macbook. Opening it up and screwing up her eyes at the blinding white light from its screen, she mashed the brightness leveller until she could comfortably see. Opening up a blank document, she began to type. It didn’t take her long to finish the article. She fixed the formatting, skipped emailling it to her senior editor, and instead posted it straight to the website. Her stomach felt fluttery, as if she’d just taken a leap into the great unknown- and Shangela supposed she had- but she had Dela and for now, that was the most important thing.

As Shangela closed the laptop, she felt Dela stir on the couch beside her. Her eyes slowly blinked open as she took in her surroundings, at first confused but then remembering where she was.

“Shangie? What are you doing?” she asked, in a voice thick with sleep.

Shangela just gave a smirk and stroked the other girl’s cheek gently before laying down next to her again. “Oh, you know. Just growing a backbone.”

She didn’t see the confused expression over Dela’s face as other girl pulled her closer to her and wrapped her arms around her. Shangela didn’t mind as long as they were both happy.

***

Later that morning, Cabinet Minister Sharon Needles woke up, made herself a coffee, and began to scroll through the day’s headlines. In one bizarre turn of events, it seemed the insufferable journalist who had interviewed her just yesterday had made waves by quitting her job quite spectacularly. The article had been taken down, but every news outlet was reporting on how Shangela Wadely had written a featurette for Femail entitled 25 Things the LGBT Community Should Just Avoid Doing, with every bullet point being quite simply “Don’t read the Daily Mail”. There had been a short, but to the point sentence at the end of it all basically telling her senior editor in so many words where he could stick his job.

Sharon was confused by it all, but not as confused as when she answered the doorbell to a man from Interflora who was holding a huge bunch of flowers with a note sticking out the top of them. Shutting the door and taking the flowers back to the kitchen, she narrowed her eyes as she began to read the note.

Dear Ms. Needles,

Thank you for being such a great ambassador for the LGBT community. I’m sorry it took that disasterous interview and my shitshow of an article for me to realise that.

Regards,

Shangela

She was just getting her head around things when she heard her girlfriend emerging from another room. Sure enough, Alaska made her way into the kitchen wearing a huge t shirt and yesterday’s makeup.

“Noodles, it’s 10am on a Saturday. What are you doing awake?” she drawled, walking over to the minister and hugging her from behind. Sharon looked once again at the note and smiled.

“I think Shangela Wadely might be gay.”

“Okay, you’re still drunk from last night. Come on. Back to bed.”

[artificialqueens]

ain't no big deal, it's innocent (bengela with a side of jivy) - trashqueens

a/n: i kissed a girl au for that killer lipsync, i would also like to add that this fic doesn’t reflect my opinions on the characters mentioned.

Dela was your typical, run-off-the-mill sweet high school girl. She was smart but not too smart, she was well-liked, she was in six different clubs in Rupaul’s High School. She was head of the student welfare group and had a football captain for a boyfriend, making them the power couple in school, which only served to boost her popularity. As the terminally delightful bubble of happiness, her laughter and enthusiasm was always infectious. She never failed to make anyone smile. There was no way anyone could resist her charm.

Shangela was just your typical grade A cold bitch. No, seriously. It made sense, since she was the head cheerleader, and unlike Dela, her popularity was built on fear as opposed to kindness. She was the kind of girl who, if she smiled in just the right way, could easily send even the seniors running in the opposite direction. She was often blunt and upfront, never bothering to talk behind someone’s back if she could just say it to their face. In some ways, her I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude was almost admirable, and most people either envied or hated her. Or both.

It seemed unlikely that two girls with such distinctive differences could ever be friends. True enough, Dela and Shangela rarely ever crossed paths. Dela was often too busy going for student leader meetings or drama class, and Shangela spent all her time on the field making freshmen cheerleaders cry.

So when Dela entered her first dance class that year, and saw Shangela in the studio, she was, well, not quite apprehensive, but curious at least. She knew the rumours surrounding Shangela, of course - she’s a bitch and a real slut too sometimes, I heard she stole some girl’s boyfriend and blew him in the back alley last year - but nonetheless, never having really interacted with her, she didn’t want to make assumptions. She prided herself on being fair and congenial. It couldn’t hurt to try making a new friend, right?

She set her bag down by the side and made her way into the studio, already dressed in her nude leotard. Shangela was on her knees in front of the mirror doing stretches. Dela watched as she bent over backwards at the waist, hands landing gracefully on the floor to form a perfect bridge. Her eyes were closed, lips slightly parted as she breathed evenly.

Dela approached her, leaning against the warm-up bars. “That’s pretty impressive,” she began.

Shangela’s eyes opened, and she straightened up before turning to look at Dela, lips quirked in what could’ve been a smile, but probably wasn’t. She didn’t respond immediately, and it took Dela a few moments to realised she wasn’t going to get a reply. She coughed awkwardly.

“Um. So, anyway, I’m -”

“Girl, please, I know who you are.” Shangela cut in with a roll of her eyes, standing up. “Dela Creme, RuPaul’s poster girl, whatever whatever. And you know me as the bitch.”

She blinked. “More like, the cheerleader, so I didn’t really expect to see you here.”

Shangela easily forced her legs into a 180 degrees split and said, “I’m a professional. I heard y’all was hiring.”

Dela was surprised, but said nothing. She didn’t think Shangela was the kind to actually do anything outside of cheerleading, but clearly she didn’t play into that stereotype. It was noticeable in the way she moved, too, her body amazingly fluid, and as she stretched in that split Dela could see her lean and muscular thighs.

The instructor came in shortly after, and they got started on their dance choreography. Throughout the lesson, she couldn’t help but sneak a glance at the girl beside her, watching her precise and purposeful movements, always in time with the beat, perfectly in sync. Shangela was focused in everything that she did, that in-it-to-win-it attitude apparently evident in dance, too, and not just cheerleading. It was almost oddly mesmerising, and Dela found most of her attention on Shangela rather than the class itself. She hadn’t even realised that practice was over until the instructor dismissed them.

It had been a long day for her. She was tired, that was all, she thought while trying to rationalise her lack of focus during today’s practice. She started on her cooling-down exercises as people started to file out. The other dancers often left as soon as they could, but she always liked staying a little later behind, to get some rare peace and quiet.

Spreading her legs slightly, she slowly bent down to touch her toes. The burn in her thighs felt good, she was practically bent over halfways with her palms flat on the floor. When she got back up, she saw movement in the mirror, and whipped around to find Shangela halfway out the door, staring at her. There was no one else around.

“What?” She asked, suddenly self-conscious.

Shangela just smirked and left.

***

What people often didn’t know about Dela was that the exterior mask she put on hid a vastly different person on the inside. She’d always had to pretend to be someone else to be liked - and while it was her own decision, she did get tired of the whole shtick sometimes. She sometimes fantasized about saying fuck it and dropping everything she’d worked so hard for, but she knew she never would. There was nothing else for her but this life, and there was too much at stake. So she continued being the teachers’ pet, turning up for all her classes and club meetings, dating the perfect guy. And she told herself that she was fine.

***

“I’m not saying that I believe the rumours, but you should probably be on your guard, either way.”

Dela always had lunch with her best friend Jinkx, and her girlfriend Ivy, in the cafeteria. Benjamin used to join them all the time when he first started seeing Dela, but he now usually hung out with his football mates.

She thought about it while sipping on her orange juice. “She wasn’t that bad, she seemed kind of nice, actually? I mean, in a room containing Thorgy and Milk, she was at the very least bearable.”

Ivy giggled. “Well, when you put it that way…”

Jinkx shook her head, unconvinced. “You can’t always trust people who ‘seem nice’. Look what happened with Rolaskatox.”

Jinkx had run for prom queen last year, with Roxxxy, Alaska and Detox as the three other nominees. The notorious clique tried to ‘befriend’ Jinkx with the full intention of kicking her out eventually, but she snatched the crown nonetheless. She never held any grudges, water off a duck’s back and all that, though Dela knew that she was still wary sometimes.

“Alaska isn’t that bad,” Dela tried to defend.

“She’s the lesser of three evils,” Ivy agreed.

“You know what I mean. Just be careful. Maybe she’ll try to steal Benjamin from you - though we’d probably have to thank her for that.���

Dela sighed. She knew that they didn’t approve of him. Sure, he was always busy at football practice, and he sometimes stared at other girls, and he wasn’t always the most sensitive, but he loved her. And relationship was about compromise, wasn’t it?

“He’s not that bad, guys.”

“Who’s not that bad?” Benjamin appeared at their table, squeezing in next to Dela. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and planted a kiss on her cheek. From across the table, she caught Ivy and Jinkx sharing a look.

“No one,” Dela smiled sweetly at him.

“You’re actually spending time with Dela today? Not eating with your friends?” Jinkx’s lips were curled upwards in false cheer.

“Came down to see my favourite lesbians,” he chortled like it was the funniest joke in the world. “Come on, give a guy a show, can I watch y’all make out?”

Jinkx looked like she was about to snap at him, but Ivy clasped a hand around her fist and whispered softly into her ear. Dela slapped Ben lightly on his shoulder. “Stop it,” she chided.

Ben just laughed again. “I’m kidding, babe. Anyway, just wanted to tell you that I’ll be at practice tonight. Big game coming up and all.”

Dela frowned. “But we had plans for tonight, you promised you’d accompany me to Adore’s birthday party. I told you weeks ago -”

“Man, I’m sorry, I just can’t, okay? I know you understand. I’ll see you tomorrow, baby, love you.” He pressed another kiss against the corner of her lips and left. Jinkx held up a black-nailed middle finger to his retreating back.

“Honestly, Dela, he’s such a dick, why do you still -”

“Jinkxy,” Dela cut her off, pressing her fingers to her temple and massaging. “Please. I don’t wanna talk about it. We’re fine.”

Jinkx must have sensed her discomfort, and shut up. Ivy laced her fingers through Jinkx’s, the simple gesture instantly calming her down, and Jinkx turned to her girlfriend, love and adoration evident in her eyes. She leaned in for a small kiss, still smiling.

Dela watched the encounter with a slight pang of jealousy. She’d only ever been like that with Benjamin in their honeymoon phase, but their spark never lasted more than a few months. They’d been dating for almost two years, and she really still did enjoy his company, but she wasn’t sure if he was still that into her. She was completely okay with being the one who invested more into the relationship, but watching Jinkx and Ivy, so loving even years into their relationship, made her long for more.

A sudden increase in chatter volume made Dela turn around. The cheerleaders swarmed in as a whole bunch, with Shangela at the front, still clad in her white Halleloo Squad uniform. Her blond hair was tied up in a high ponytail with a white scrunchie, and she looked more like she’d just stepped out of the shower, rather than spent 3 hours sweating in the middle of the hot field.

“Jeez, the speak of the devil syndrome is real today,” Jinkx commented. Dela laughed.

She watched as the group sauntered over to the footballers’ table, most of them shamelessly flirting with the guys. Courtney was halfway draped over Andrew, tilting her head and giggling at everything he said. And Shangela -

Dela tried not to watch, she didn’t want to be the easily jealous or possessive type. But Shangela was seated right next to Benjamin, eyeing him purposefully, that lopsided grin on her face once more. She twirled a lock of hair around her finger, saying something that Dela couldn’t catch from a distance, and placed a hand on his shoulder.

Jinkx must’ve caught her looking, because she said, “Dela, she’s doing it on purpose and you know it.”

Dela turned to her friend, whose eyebrows were furrowed, eyes full of concern. She swallowed and looked back down at her plate, picking up her apple and taking a bite even though she wasn’t hungry. “You don’t know that. She could just be being friendly.”

“I think Dela knows what she’s doing,” Ivy said lightly, and looked at Jinkx meaningfully. “Come on, let’s get out of here.” Jinkx nodded and gathered her belongings.

Dela got up, but turned around one last time. What she wasn’t expecting was for Shangela to be unabashedly staring right back, and grinning. She winked.

Confused and flushing uncontrollably, Dela let herself be dragged away by her friends.

***

Turns out, Dela also shared another class with Shangela in Calculus, due to the timetable switch. She didn’t have any of her closer friends with her, so she was sitting alone in the second row when Shangela walked in. That in itself was a bit of surprise, given that A) Shangela was almost always late, and B) she usually came in a box. (It was a long story.)

Shangela picked the seat next to Dela, which was even more of a surprise. And her first words were, “You know, your guy’s kinda cute and all, but I don’t really know what you see in him. Kinda boring, huh?”

Startled, Dela took a moment to recover. She didn’t know what Shangela’s motives were. Did she want Benjamin for herself? Or was she sowing discord for no reason? She replied, “I’m sorry, that was kind of rude? He’s a great boyfriend.”

Shangela just snorted. “If you say so, cutie.”

Dela’s insides twisted uncomfortably. Shangela was really good at making her riled up for no reason, in a way no one had been able to before. Something about her just… got under Dela’s skin. It was unnerving.

She spent the rest of the lesson in silence, concentrating hard on the questions on her worksheet, trying to keep up with the pace. She forced herself not to notice Shangela’s messy scrawl of words across the paper, the smell of her cherry chapstick, or the way her collarbones jutted out when she leaned forward in her seat.

Needless to say, she kind of failed.

When the bell rang, Dela gathered up her things quickly, desperate for some fresh air outside the classroom. She had been cooped up too long, her mind a whirlwind of strange thoughts. She was the first one out of the classroom, and as she speed-walked along the corridors to the next class, she pretended not to hear Shangela’s voice calling out her name from behind her.

***

dela: jinkxy you there?

jinkx: what’s up darlin’

dela: oh uhm

dela: i don’t know… shangela’s been acting weird and it’s all a little confusing

jinkx: i mean i doubt she’s ever acted normal but

jinkx: is this about ben?

dela: umm… maybe? probably?

jinkx: you should talk to him

jinkx: and then probably also talk to her

jinkx: and then you can talk to me and i’ll tell you that you deserve better :-)

dela: awww you sweetheart

dela: but ok I’ll do that

dela: love you <3

jinkx: <3

***

Dela wasn’t always this popular. She was a bit of an outcast back in 5th grade, when rumours started spreading about her and Jinkx. They were just really good friends, but people thought it was more than that, and, well - 5th graders were insensitive and mean. Really mean.

It’s not like Dela didn’t already know that Jinkx was gay. She never had a problem with it, Jinkx was her best friend and she’d always be a hundred percent supportive. But Dela knew that she herself was straight, that she couldn’t not be straight, and it’d be weird for her to like like another girl. The thought of people calling her a dyke or a lesbo was downright frightening, and so she’d kept any strange or unnatural feelings she’d ever had to herself. She wanted to be a good girl, she wanted to grow up and be a successful woman with a loving husband and three kids and she wanted her family to be proud of her.

So she avoided the mean girls at all costs, throwing all her attention into her work and achievements in various fields. By the end of her sophomore year, she’d somehow also managed to catch the eye of the most popular boy, and that was when she started dating Ben. The girls no longer called her names, and she was more than happy to leave the past in the past. And if she ever felt like there was something missing in her life, a subconscious thought that caused mild anxiety to ripple through her, well, she was great at suppressing it.

***

“So… Do you know Shangela well or something?”

Dela tried to play her question as casual as possible, and predictably, Ben didn’t pick up the cue.

“Sort of. The Halleloo Squad’s always practicing while we’re playing footie on the field, so. She’s a popular one, isn’t she?”

“I saw her eyeing you, the other day in the cafeteria.” Dela shrugged as Ben turned to look at her. “She was flirting, and, I dunno, you seemed to be having a lot of fun too.”

He groaned. “Aw, come on, babe, don’t pull that card. You know I hate that whole jealousy bullshit. She’s just cool, okay? Christ, I swear you fucking do this to every girl I so much as make eye contact with.”

Resentment burned inside of Dela, but she shut up and dropped the topic.

***

Over the course of the next few weeks, Dela couldn’t help but notice Shangela everywhere. She saw her in the corridors while walking to her next class, talking and flirting shamelessly with Benjamin whenever he had a break between football matches, and on one particular occasion, smoking a cigarette alone behind the main building, a common hiding spot. She never seemed to be able to avoid the other girl - her aura was always present, to the point where Dela just always instinctively knew whenever she was around. It was driving her a little crazy, but the day she caught Shangela with Ben in an empty classroom was the final straw.

Dela was just looking for a quiet place to get her mind off things and finish her art project. Her favourite classroom, which was always empty after the main lessons, just happened to be occupied at that time. She’d heard voices from inside, and was about to go elsewhere to try her luck, when she recognised Shangela’s laughter. Followed by Ben’s voice.

She crept around the doorway, and there they were - Shangela sitting on the teacher’s desk, Ben with his arms on either side of her and pressing his lips firmly against hers, Shangela’s legs around his waist and arms around his neck.

Dela couldn’t tear her eyes away from the scene. She stared in shock, hand clapped over her mouth, until she couldn’t take it anymore and fled. She ran in the opposite direction as fast as she could, until she couldn’t breathe, until she was kneeling on the floor in an abandoned corner gasping for air.

She left for home earlier than usual, and stayed in bed the rest of the night, unable to get the mental images out of her head. The way Shangela’s fingernails were pressed into the back of his neck, her closed eyes with those long, long eyelashes, the way her lips interlocked with his.

She tried and tried and tried, but she couldn’t cry. She wasn’t even upset. Not even the slightest bit of anger at Ben cheating on her.

All she knew was that it all felt wrong.

***

dela: you’re a cunt and i’m breaking up with you.

[you have blocked benjamin putnam.]

***

Dela walked into the girls’ locker room the next day at 6, just as the cheerleaders were done showering after practice. She caught the tail-end of Alaska’s ‘byeeeeee’ as she left, and then there was silence. She hadn’t seen Shangela come out, so Dela knew she’d still be in there, and hopefully alone, so they’d get to talk.

She sat herself down at the benches outside the shower room and waited, nervously wringing her hands together. She needed to, as Jinkx so nicely worded it, ‘confront a bitch and punch her in the face’. Even after a sleepless night of her mind running endlessly, she still felt nothing but confusion, and she knew she had business to sort out with Shangela.

Soon enough, Shangela stepped out into the locker room, wearing a black and white polka dotted dress, wet hair dripping down her back. She raised an eyebrow when she saw Dela.

“You lookin’ for me, Miss Congeniality?”

Dela stood up and approached her, trying her hardest to quell the pounding in her chest. “Fuck you,” she said shakily. “Stop pretending. I know what you’re doing. You don’t fool me with your innocent act, I saw you with Ben yesterday.”

Shangela didn’t even bat an eyelid at that, just smirked, drying her hair with her towel while still looking Dela in the eye. “You enjoy the show? To be fair, he did come onto me first, I wasn’t even interested, so he can take credit. I must say though, still tasted the cherry flavour on him, don’t know if it was from you or some other girl -”

“Shut up!” Dela’s voice quavered, and her hands were trembling slightly. Heat pooled inside of her, but she wouldn’t let herself back down. “You’re a bitch, I know what they say about you, that you’re a slut with no morals.”

If anything, Shangela’s grinned widened. “I bet there’s one rumour you haven’t heard yet.” She stepped forward, inching closer to Dela, who started backing away until she was pressed against a wall. Dela hated how cowardly she felt, how powerless she was, confronting another girl over another guy when she didn’t even have the guts to admit how she really felt. She was lost and confused and utterly cornered by Shangela, who was merely five inches away by then.

Shangela leaned in and said softly, “Don’t you know what this is really about?”

Dela didn’t know what happened or who initiated it, but suddenly warm lips were on hers and she was kissing Shangela like her life depended on it. She was all soft skin and kissable red lips, and all of sudden everything clicked and made sense and for the first time in a long while, Dela felt like she was doing something right.

Shangela’s tongue brushed against her lips, teasing her gently and she couldn’t help but grab the back of her head and pull her impossibly closer, wanting more but not getting enough. She felt Shangela’s hands grabbing her ass moaned into her mouth, lifting her own legs to wrap them around Shangela’s waist. It felt so undeniably good, threading her fingers through the other girl’s hair and pulling, hearing Shangela make those soft little noises of pleasure, and Dela felt a pleasant shiver run down her spine. Kissing girls was a million times better than kissing boys, why hadn’t she ever realised? How could she have been so blind?

The loud slam of a locker door from somewhere in the distance snapped them both back to reality, and they practically jumped apart. Shangela looked positively ruined, hair wet and messy and eyes heavy with lust. Dela could only imagine how much worse she looked. Then her eyes widened in shock as it finally hit her - she’d kissed a girl, and actually liked it.

“Fuck,” she said, “Fuck, I’m gay.”

Shangela stared at her for one long moment, until she finally burst out in a fit of uncharacteristic giggles. Dela, still startled silly, joined in shortly after, until they were both laughing uncontrollably and gasping for air.

“I’m sorry,” Shangela choked, still wheezing, “You let a girl seduce you for weeks, then make out with her in the locker room like you’ve been doing it your whole life, and that’s the first thing you say?”

“I’m not thinking straight,” Dela grinned, leaning her head back against the wall and one hand braced on her stomach. “You know, you did actually flirt with Ben a lot, and I got confused about which side the jealousy ran, so that’s your fault.”

“Maybe not the best way to get your attention, but it worked, so.” Shangela, still slightly breathless but much calmer, smirked. “Wanna get out of here?”

“Hell yes.”

***

jinkx: so how’d it go

dela: i punched her

jinkx: wait what?????

dela: in the mouth

dela: with my mouth

jinkx: OMG WHAT DETAILS NOW

jinkx: hello???

dela: she’s kind of busy at the moment. -s

dela: or at least, her hands are. -s

jinkx: omg you fuckers

dela: that’s the idea. -s

[artificialqueens]

Morning Sunshine (Bengela Fic)

A.N. - it’s fiction, so duh none of this is real. Based on their drag personas not the actual people :)

Shangela woke up earlier than she really should have. It was going to be a long day, full of exams and she needed energy. Whilst her biological clock forced her to stop sleeping, the alarm clock showed it was six, when she needed to be up at eight.

She didn’t all that mind though since she got to catch a glimpse of her girlfriend asleep. As creepy as it may sound, Shangela loved seeing Dela when she was asleep - she looked calm, peaceful, and akin to an angel.

She tried to keep her breath as steady and even as possible to not wake up her sleeping beauty, but she had to go to the bathroom. Internally cringing, as she knew she’d most likely wake her up, she gently lifted her arms, which had been wrapped around Dela, and slowly got off the bed. She tiptoed to the bathroom and just hoped she hadn’t accidentally woken up her baby, because she knows she needed her sleep.

After washing her hands, Shangela made her way back, forgetting to be as gentle as she had on the way over and walking with her feet flat on the floor, the boards creaking under her feet. She climbed into bed a touch more reckless, but still being considerate. Returning her arms to their previous position, she buried her head in Dela’s neck and breathed in the scent of Dela and her hair, which smelt like the coconut conditioner she always used.

She felt the body underneath her stir and she held her breath in fear Dela would get pissed at her for waking her up so early. The stirring stopped for a moment and she let out a slight sigh of relief, until she heard Dela’s coarse, faint morning voice.

“Shangieeee, why’d you wake me up?” she grumbled lightly, her back pushing up against Shangela’s chest. “I wanna sleep,” she murmured, letting a faint gasp out when Shangela turned her over so they were facing each other.

“I’m sorry baby, I couldn’t sleep. Morning sunshine.” Shangela’s voice spoke in a faint whisper to not annoy the newly awoken girl in her arms further, and she placed a kiss on her girlfriend’s soft lips. Dela reciprocated, wrapping her arms around Shangela lazily, enveloping herself in the warmth of her Shangie.

The kiss broke, and Shangela lifted an arm to poke Dela’s nose teasingly. The girl giggled, inching one arm up and massaging the back of Shangela’s head, running her fingers through the blonde curls. Dela’s eyes were puffy from the shortened sleep time, and she couldn’t make much noise other than grumbling and a slight laugh. Their lips met once more, this time not broken nearly as soon. The silence was a nice change from their usual talkative nature - they lay there just enjoying each other’s company in the dawn of the morning.

“I love you my angel,” Shangela whispered sweetly into Dela’s ear, pressing warm kisses everywhere her lips could touch on her face. Dela sighed happily and rubbed Shangela’s back lightly, wanting to reciprocate the loving gestures back.

Shangela continued to pepper every inch her girlfriend’s face with light, sweet kisses, one of her hands beginning to inch down Dela’s body. She began to rub Dela through her panties, and smiled as she heard Dela mewl in response.

“Want me to fuck you angel?” Shangela whispered to her, smirking as she continued to massage her through the cotton, and Dela felt her panties dampen almost immediately at that question.

“Pleaseee…” Dela begged, her voice faint. Shangela couldn’t refuse. They begun to make out as Shangela’s hand slipped into her panties, feeling her smoothly shaven pelvic area. She began to rub two fingers against Dela’s wet entrance, before pushing one in slowly. Dela moaned into the kiss, feeling Shangela’s cold finger enter her. She thrusted the finger in and out, rubbing Dela’s clit with her thumb for added stimulation. Dela broke the kiss, a string of saliva connecting their tongues, and sighed as she felt a second finger enter her. Then came a third. Shangela’s eyes were half-lidded, from both lust and exhaustion, as she watched her girlfriend come apart, a gleam of morning sunlight shining over her. She truly looked like an angel with her face framed with her loose black curls, her lips pink and slightly swollen, and her face blushing. The beam of light intensifying her beauty further solidified the fact that Shangela had truly been blessed with a goddess.

Dela took her pillow and mushed her face in it, concealing her breathy moans and watering eyes as Shangela’s fingers pushed into her at a rapid pace, hitting her special spot every time. “Oohhhh… I might come Shangie,” she breathed out, a squeal emerging as the pace sped up even further.

“Then come for me sweetie.” Shangela’s thumb begun to swirl her clit faster, and Dela couldn’t deny her body of an orgasm for any longer. She released a high pitched, closed mouth moan as her opening clenched hard around Shangela’s fingers, her juices coating them. The sight of her girlfriend coming was one she wanted forever burned into her memory. Her thrusts slowed down as Dela came down from her high, and she pulled three soaked, tan fingers out, and allowed her wet panties to cover her girlfriend’s pussy once more. She held her wet fingers to Dela’s mouth and Dela wrinkled her face. Shangela was all sorts of confused.

“But you like doing it usually? What’s wrong?”

“Yeah, I’d prefer to do it if my underwear wasn’t wet.” Shangela’s eyes rolled into the back of her head. What a princess.

“Who’s the one that made them wet?” She asked Dela as she pulled them off her body with her clean hand.

“Shut up bitch.” No malice, of course, laced her tone. This time when Shangela pressed her fingers to Dela’s lips, pink lips wrapped around them eagerly and her tongue swirled each digit thoroughly until each was fully cleaned. She pulled her fingers out, and Dela rolled from her position in being next to Shangela to being on top of her.

Dela was out of her morning grumpy phase and seemed much more alive. “Lay down, I wanna eat you out.” Those words alone were probably enough to make Shangela die happy. Respecting her girlfriend’s command, she got on her back and smiled watching Dela eagerly pulling down her panties and spreading her thighs. Dela’s eyes glistened as she looked at her girlfriend’s dripping, slightly hairy pussy. Laying on her stomach, Dela inhaled the scent of her before leaning in to lightly lick her folds.

Shangela sighed in pleasure as she felt Dela’s tongue lap at her labia, watching as Dela buried her face in her pussy. She lifted her torso off the bed and pet Dela’s hair as Dela was sucking her swollen clit and fucking her with her tongue. “Good little slut, eating me out like it’s your job.” The words caused Dela to moan into Shangela’s pussy, the moan vibrating her clit and intensifying the pleasure Shangela felt. Shangela pushed Dela’s face into her pussy as she began to approach her orgasm, wanting her tongue to never leave her. Dela sucked on her clit and twirled her tongue over it, and inserted a finger into Shangela, causing Shangela to let out a long moan as she came. Dela obediently lapped up the flow, swallowing, and pressed a light kiss to her labia after her orgasm stopped before climbing back onto the bed.

Shangela immediately pulled her in for a hug, murmuring ‘I love you’ repeatedly as the two laid down once more. Dela’s arms were wrapped around Shangela’s back, and she pressed a kiss to Shangela’s cheek, then softly to her lips. Silence emerged once more as they took a moment to stabilize their breathing.

“Wanna just sleep in today? I’ll write excuses for us,” Dela offered, clearly not in the mood for hours of the meticulous reading and answering of paragraphs.

Shangela smiled at her, eyes closing as she felt sleep finally begin to come upon her again. “Sounds great.”

[artificialqueens]

Acceptance Part 2/? (Dela/Shangela) - outlawed-melodies

“Oh honey, I have my ways,” was the last thing Dela remembered hearing before the girl who rescued her tightly grabbed her hand and bolted forward, dragging a very startled and off-guard Dela along with her.

As much as Dela hoped the stranger knew where she was going, she was extremely skeptical. She lead her down many different paths, mainly back alleys and a couple very dark parking lots, even some places she didn’t recognize, but they eventually found themselves running up the stairs of an abandoned apartment complex, attempting to get up to the roof, per request of the dark-skinned stranger.

After a lot struggling and a little bit of luck on Dela’s part, the two reached the top of the building. As soon as Dela found her grounding, she collapsed, struggling to catch her breath. Quickly remembering her breathing exercises, she inhaled, held it for five seconds, and exhaled. She continued to do this until she was able to breathe without gasping for air.

After a moment of silence, Dela spoke: “Well… I guess that’s one way to lose them."

The stranger let out a hardy laugh, extending a hand to help Dela back up. "Sorry, ‘bout that. I’m not that creative of a person. Just thought this would be the easiest way to lose them."

Dela took her hand, letting the stranger pull her up. She stumbled into her, causing another laugh from the brunette to ring as she helped steady Dela.

"Jeez, you’re falling for me already and I don’t even know your name.” She chuckled, her lips curling up to a smile.

Dela blushed, causing a shy smile to form on her lips. “Dela. It’s, uh…French.“

"French?” The stranger’s head cocked to the side. “French for what?"

Dela paused, immediately cursing herself for mentioning it. She embarrassedly mumbled, ”…of the.“

The stranger, first confused, immediately let out another laugh. She sure seemed to laugh a lot. "That’s weird, but okay. I’m Shangela. Shangela Laquifa Wadley. Don’t know what it means, but it’s fierce, like me.”

Dela’s smile widened. “Well…thank you, Shangela. For saving me back there. I don’t know what I would have done back there if it weren’t for you.”

"Girl, it was no problem whatsoever. I wasn’t gonna allow some group of men to follow you home. Speaking of them…”

Shangela marched over to the edge of the roof, peering over it before sitting down and gazing down at the dim lights below. After noting the group of men were nowhere in sight, she let out a mocking, “Ha!” She smiled proudly at herself. “Can’t find us now, can they?"

She turned her head to look for Dela, who ended up sitting a bit back, nowhere close to where she was, though. She noted how Dela almost lifelessly stared down, potentially in a contemplative state. After what felt like hours to Shangela, who was tired of all the silence, she called out, "Hey, don’t be a stranger, Miss Dela! I don’t bite.”

Dela’s head jolted up to look at Shangela. She nervously shook her head. “I-I’m fine here, but thank you.”

“You scared of a little height, little Miss Dela?” Shangela questioned, slowly standing up and coming over to Dela’s side.

Dela once again, found herself speechless.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Shangela sat herself down by Dela, staring out towards the dark sky above them.

It wasn’t like Dela to struggle with words. She usually could go on and on about whatever topic, even if she wasn’t interested in it, but for some reason, her mind drew a complete blank. And she hated it. And her face showed it as her lips drooped and her posture tensed. If it was even possible to be personified, Dela was the embodiment of discomfort.

Noticing Dela’s unusual expression, Shangela carefully rested her hand against Dela’s, letting her thumb caress her smooth skin. “It’s okay now. It’s just you and me, girl. No one’s coming for you now.”

Dela froze. For a moment, she had forgotten about everything that happened to her this week. She forgot about the broken windows and the $300 she had to spend to pay for replacements. She forgot about crying in her bathroom as someone yelled and banged on her front door. Most importantly, she forgot about how alienated she felt for leaving another relationship she didn’t even want.

Dela covered her mouth, trying to force herself not to cry, but she couldn’t stop the tears from falling. She hated drama. She hated it. And she did not want to pull Shangela into it, especially as is dawned on Dela why each terrible event kept happening after the other. “They’ll probably be there when I get home. Or whatever’s left of it…” she hiccupped, trying to keep her speech as coherent as possible. "This whole week has been so confusing and scary for me. I’ve had bricks thrown through my window the past few nights, I almost had a break-in the other night, and people have been spray painting slurs on my door-”

“Hold up a second,” Shangela interrupted, her tone quickly developing into a harsher sound. “They’ve been doing what? Oh hell no! I am not allowing that shit to fly by. That is unacceptable-” Shangela stopped for a moment, noticing Dela tensing up even more.

Deciding to lower her voice, Shangela whispered after another long silence, “Okay, what we’re gonna do is we’re gonna go by your place, grab some of your things, and have you stay with me for a few days so this shit can clear out.”

Dela shook her head no, despite knowing she would be dragged into it anyways. She felt very conflicted. On one hand, Dela wanted to go with Shangela. She made her feel safe. She made her forget her stresses. But on the other hand, Dela felt…strange. Strange in a way she hasn’t felt before. And that frightened her even more than everything she’s experienced this week combined.

“Girl, I am not letting you stay in the line of danger. And you know that.” Shangela moved so Dela could see her, even with her head buried in her hands. Tenderly, Shangela took one of Dela’ hands, giving it a light and protective squeeze. “You’re obviously not safe at home, so come with me.”

Dela felt her cheeks burn up, her stomach twirling in ways she didn’t know were possible. She felt herself space out, trying to figure out what was going on with her. What…What am I feeling right now? I don’t…I don’t understand this. Her lips parted slightly, trying to say something, but she couldn’t get the words out.

“Hey, Earth to Dela. Earth to Miss Dela.” Shangela waved a hand in front of her, trying to catch her attention.

Flustered, Dela let her eyes go towards Shangela, her mind racing with multiple questions and no answers whatsoever.

Shangela softly chuckled, tilting her head slightly. “And she finally returns.” Putting her brave and confident face back on, Shangela stood up, once again holding her hand out towards Dela. “Come on. Let’s get you home.”

Gingerly, Dela nodded, taking Shangela’s hand, this time not falling into the other girl. This time, the only other difference was that Shangela didn’t let go of Dela’s hand, and wouldn’t up until they reached Dela’s.

[artificialqueens]

Acceptance: Chapter 3 (Dela/Shangela) - outlawed-melodies

Dela found herself virtually spaced out on the way home, Shangela having to constantly nudge Dela in order to get her back to reality so she could direct them to Dela’s apartment complex. Dela couldn’t help it; something was wrong with her today. Maybe it was the stress of the past week causing her to lose focus. Or perhaps it was the thought of potentially meeting her stalkers by her home that kept her thoughts elsewhere. But even then, she wasn’t sure if that was the reason for her distracted behavior or not.

Shangela gently nudged Dela’s arm. “Dela, how close are we to your place?” she asked impatiently, probably having asked this same question dozens of times.

Dela took a moment to glance around and refocus her attention to her surroundings. The familiar area caused her to smile slightly. “We’re almost there. I’m on the bottom floor of this next building.” Despite the relief of almost being home, Dela couldn’t help but feel bad for spacing out so much on Shangela, especially considering how much she was willing to help despite the two just meeting each other. Dela only hoped her room would be the same as it was when she left this morning: spray-painted and a mess from the many anxiety-ridden nights.

Approaching Dela’s apartment door, Shangela quickly noticed the bright red spray-painted words across Dela’s door and frowned. “Jesus. Do people really still have hard feelings against gay people? Unbelievable.”

“Yeah…” was all Dela could muster out, once again getting back into her head. She couldn’t help but question herself. Was she gay? Did she actually like girls? Well…she didn’t know. Most people she knew told her they knew they liked the same gender since they were very young, and practically always knew. Dela, on the other hand, had no idea whatsoever. All she knew was that she didn’t like guys. Supposedly.

Noticing Dela’s hesitation, Shangela gently put her hand on Dela’s shoulder. “Hey… I just want you to know that I accept you the way you are. It’s a difficult world for us, y’know? We’re different…but that’s okay. Just keep your head high and you’ll be okay.”

Dela couldn’t help but let a small smile peek out, even though neither of them had a clue about the extent of her feelings. “Thank you…” she whispered, finally getting her keys out of her pockets and unlocking her door. She peered inside, instinctively putting her keys back in her back pocket, and sighed, relieved. “Never thought I’d say this, but I’m glad this place is how I left it.”

The two walked inside, Shangela closing the door behind her and locking it per Dela’s request. Shangela sat down on Dela’s caramel colored couch, her eyes fixated on the messy living room while Dela immediately went to her bedroom, pulling out a big purple suitcase from under her bed.

Shangela listened to the suitcase unzip and closed her eyes, paying attention to Dela’s movements in the other room as she moved back and forth and back and forth to who knows where. After a few minutes of silence, Shangela spoke: “So, Dela, I hope you don’t mind me asking, but like, how do you identify your sexual orientation?”

“Excuse me?” Dela’s voice perked up, a hint of confusion arising in her tone.

“You know, like do you exclusive like girls, or are you bi or pan? Or do they give you shit ‘cause you’re ace? ‘Cause no straight person I know has ever had fa-“ Shangela stopped herself. “Uh…y'know…that painted on their door before.”

“I’m…” Dela took a moment to find the right word. “Questioning.”

“Questioning, huh? Well, I guess that can set ‘em off too.”

“I guess…” Dela uttered uncomfortably. “I’d…rather not talk about it right now.”

“Understood, princess.”

Dela sighed, staring at her half-full suitcase. She had so many things, and not enough space for them all. But then again, she didn’t want to bring every possession she owned to Shangela’s. Like she said, she’d be there for a few days, maybe a week at the most. It’s only until things settle down here. It won’t be that long…

Stepping into her closet, Dela took the time to change from her work clothes into something more comfortable. She pulled out a light pink t-shirt that was slightly baggy on her and a pair of black leggings and changed into them. This wasn’t Dela’s usual go to for clothes, but at this point, she could care less.

“So, uh…what about you?” Dela inquired, the silence bothering her.

“Me?” Shangela asked. “I’m bi, but I have a preference towards the ladies. I can handle them more than I can with men.”

Dela chuckled softly. She didn’t know why she did, but it just…happened. Maybe it was the fact Shangela knew who she was as an individual, or the idea of being so comfortable with your sexuality that fascinated Dela, considering she was now “questioning” hers. Dela liked it when she believed she knew herself. She just hoped the empowering feeling of confidence would return once she figured out this whole sexuality thing.

Dela stepped out of her closet and wandered around her room, organizing the things she decided to keep and shoving the rest in her bag. Slowly, her room became cleaner…and emptier. She dragged her suitcase out to the living room, the purple fabric bulging out in all sorts of places. To say her bag wasn’t packed was…an understatement.

Shangela’s glance went to Dela, then to her suitcase. She didn’t seem very amused. “Jeez, what all is in there? Did you pack the entire house in there?”

Dela nervously chuckled. Kinda. “No…Just the essentials.”

“Sure. “ Shangela eyed Dela suspiciously. “Come on, let’s get this in your car and head on out.”

Dela nodded, leaning down to pick up her suitcase. She held it in her arms as if she held a newborn, close and protectively. Shangela opened the door for her, letting Dela go out first. Luckily, Dela’s vehicle, sat right next to her door. Her vehicle. Which was a 2014 minivan. Shangela noted to make some sort of joke about it at a later point.

“Oh, shit.” Dela uttered. “I can’t reach my keys.”

“Where they at?” Shangela asked. “I’ll get them.”

Dela bit her lip slightly. “No, I can get them, could you just ho-“

“Dela, where are they at?” Shangela impatiently asked.

Dela averted her eyes and mumbled, “Back pocket. On the right.”

She felt her face flush. Thank God for it being dark out. It was… embarrassing to say the least. Sure, moments like these have happened before, but it was with people she knew. Additionally, considering the fact she had spent the past several hours questioning whether or not she liked girls or not did not help her judgement as she felt Shangela’s hand slide into her back pocket and quickly pull out her keys. You’re overthinking this, Dela and you know it. This is nothing. It means nothing and don’t you dare try convincing yourself it’s something because it’s not.

Shangela unlocked Dela’s car door, making sure the back door also opened so Dela could put her luggage in. As soon as Dela dropped off her suitcase, Shangela handed Dela her keys, a sly smile on her face. She said nothing, but Shangela’s expression said a million words. Was she…flirting with me? No. Dela. It’s nothing. You’re just overthinking things because you’re stressed. Once you sleep things will be better. Hopefully.

“You have everything?” Shangela asked.

“I think I have everything, but let me double check.” Dela headed back to her apartment, Shangela following behind. Shangela stopped by the front door while Dela continued on into her bedroom.

“Okay, so I have my clothes…shoes…phone and its charger…That should be-“ She stopped and stared straight at her desk. At the huge tank. With her two turtles. Who were both peacefully sleeping at the bottom of the tank.

“Hey, uh, Shangela, could you help me?” Dela called out, disappointed in the fact she almost left her two babies behind. Sure, they can go a while without food, but how long was she going to be gone, exactly? And what if someone broke in and hurt them? Dela wouldn’t be able to forgive herself for leaving them behind, knowing how dangerous it was for her to stay here.

“Yeah sure, what’s-“ Shangela stopped in the doorway, immediately noticing the huge tank on Dela’s desk. “You have… pet turtles?”

Dela nervously smiled. “I need help moving their tank.”

Shangela frowned. “Can’t you ask someone to look after them for a week? It won’t be that long.” Dela stubbornly shook her head, her eyes full of concern and her lips pouting. “No one else has a tank for them! And I don’t want to leave them here when someone could come on by and try and hurt them. Please, Shangela?”

Shangela looked at Dela. Usually, she was able to resist people’s pouting faces, but she couldn’t help but give in to Dela and the love she had for her two turtles. She reluctivity sighed. “Fine, let’s empty the tank and get it in the car.”

And after a good half an hour of carefully dumping out the water and even more carefully getting the tank out of the apartment and into the floor of Dela’s back seat, they were finally ready to leave Dela’s.

Dela ran back to her apartment, double checking if she locked her door while Shangela chilled in the front passenger seat. She messed around with the radio, trying to find a station with some decent music to listen to for the ride, but found herself interrupted by a loud and high-pitched scream: Dela’s.

[artificialqueens]

I want to see some more Bengela fics :( can anyone pls suggest some stuff?

This is everything we’ve got here on AQ, but maybe people have recs for AO3?

https://artificialqueens.tumblr.com/tagged/dela-x-shangela

[artificialqueens]

hi Sammy Indigo, i will love anything that u write but i for one would love any sashea, blair x vixen, dela x shangela, witney, sharon x phi phi, sharon x willam, or shalaska. also if u ever wanted to do another fic with family vibes i would love to see Shea be Vixen's big sis. okay that's me done now i think i've just managed to request the full 25 days so Alexa play Greedy by Ariana Grande 💖💖💖

[artificialqueens]

I demand some sort of shangela x dela soft lesbian au shit thx

[artificialqueens]

Please Some Dela X Shangela ! 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼