#dib is an oblivious boy

[blazing--comet]

IM TOO EXCITED TO SHARE THIS SO I WILL HERE

BASICALLY in February I came up with this concept for another au ,, NOT MY MAIN AU and it's not connected to my main one either , other than the concept of Units (which if anybody is ever curious about here I'd LOVE to chat about it) BUT MOSTLY FOR FUNSIES !!! decided to actually pick up this au and work on it for a fun sillyyy cause I've been thinking about all the concepts and ideas for it the past many months ‼️‼️

ITS CALLED , disguised AU , for now at least... IF I COME UP WITH A BETTER TITLE (I probably will but I suck balls at naming things) ILL UPDATE UT BUT YEAHHH

SUMMARY : In the past 100 plus years , Earth and the human species gained incredible technology and advancement due to alien contact , but with that , the planet was tied into the many years war of Irkens vs . Vortians and the Meekrob . The were NOT on the side of the Irkens , and didn't play a huge role in the war until Professor Membrane , an unexpected hero came along . There was no information where he came from , but his help in the war was gladly welcome .

As the Irkens were beginning to lose the war , very slowly , they turned to desperate measures , committing atrocities and such , and eventually came up with the idea to INFILTRATE the three species they were fighting . There were several Irkens sent to each planet , with no other instructions other than to " Gain information and report back to the Empire on it ." Zim and Tak were the two Irkens assigned to "invade" the Membrane Labs , which was one of the most important aspects of the invasion . They each had different ways and plans to find more information , but reported to the Tallest their findings equally .

Zim had decided to be an Intern at the Labs for a bit , and was eventually hired . He is soon assigned to work in the "Design Department" , specifically to work on weapons and spacecrafts . In his work , he meets Dib Membrane , the son of Professor Membrane , a young adult(they're *both* like 18-19ish in this AU) with the same interests and ideas of him , and his key to succeeding in his mission . Zim pretends to "befriend" Dib at first , and ends up genuinely becoming close friends with him , and has some realizations about the Empire and some things about himself . Eventually , Dib stumbles across Zim out of disguise , which comes across as a betrayal to Dib because he believed Zim was all along just using him for information , and ends up ignoring and avoiding him for a while before Zim confronts him .

After the two work through the problem and communicate about it (this doesn't go without a lot of tension and angst though , I will say that) , Zim decides he really does need to leave the Empire .

THATS WHAT IM AT DURING THE MOMENT , OBVIOUSLY I STILL HAVE A LOT TO FIGURE OUT ESPECIALLY WHEN ZIM LEAVES , BUT THAT IS FOR WHEN I GET THERE 🫡 tehehehehe ANYWHO

I also wanted to quick clarify that Dib didn't know Zim was an Irken beforehand because of his disguise . Hence the name of the AU . It's not a shitty ass one like he has in the show , it's very similar to the one TAK had in "Tak; the hideous new girl" . It's a hologram in a way , but it works even better than the disguise that she had , since the technology in disguises would have been needed to be EXTRA advanced for the Irkens infiltrating the planets . Example of his disguise is in the last drawing !!! Dib was also sort of suspecting it , not that he was exactly IRKEN , but that he was some sort of alien species , but he could never be sure because of how good the disguise was .

[dr-mothman]

These mf would have a legendary beef

[erwinsvow]

i don’t have an idea but i LOVE this concept!!

https://www.tumblr.com/erwinsvow/746599631379726336/i-really-really-really-really-wanna-write-about

babee got inspired to write something heres a tiny lil blurb of it! more coming tmro ♡ the link

being rafe’s friend wasn’t for the faint of heart. you’re really not sure how you even ended up like this—accompanying the boys on their golf trips, claiming perpetual dibs on shotgun in rafe’s truck, even sneaking little packets of coke into parties for rafe to sell. you think you’ve just gotten used to it, when rafe or one of the other boys—though it’s usually always rafe—pulls something out of left field to surprise you.

you were their friend, but you were still a girl—even if you were completely oblivious to the way they stare at the hem of your tiny golf skirt when you’re putting. even if you get too drunk and touchy around them at the house parties, a giggly mess that has to get carried back to tannyhill with rafe. his family is suspicious, and you can’t deny the way it looks. with the amount of time you spend there, you’re practically his girlfriend. you dismiss the thought when anyone brings it up though. 

“kelce and topper slept on the floor that night. is rafe dating them too?” you laugh it off, trying to justify why you slept on the bed with rafe. later that night though, when rafe picks you up to bring you to the party, you play with the skinny straps of your dress, wondering how to tell him what you’re thinking.

he’s a good friend though—he always knows when you get like this.

“spit it out, kid. what?”

“well, i was thinking maybe i should crash at kelce’s tonight.”

“why?” he questions, like it’s the stupidest thing in the world. you don’t catch the way his grip tightens on the wheel. 

“well, last night.. everyone was saying it’s weird that i always crash at yours. and kelce always offers, he’s got that pull out bed-”

“y’not sleepin’ at kelce’s. or top’s.”

“why not?”

“‘cause i said so. don’t ask again.” and though you’re used to getting to boss rafe around, this time, you listen.

[axelsagewrites]

Heyyy! Ok so hear me out..can I request a Modern AU! Aegon x Fem! OC fic. The OC is neighbors with Aegon, Helena, Aemond, and Daeron. She’s always had a bit of a crush on Aegon but he’s always too busy drinking, smoking, having sex ( the OC’s and Aegon’s windows are directly across so the OC can see everything going on in Aegons room and even sees him fucking a girl), etc. to notice. So, the OC gravitates towards Helena and becomes Helena’s best friend. There’s also one rule the OC can never date or have sexual relations with any of Helena’s brothers. Years later (cut to Tom Glynn-Carney’s Aegon), the OC and Helena are still best friends but the OC goes to a frat party and sees Aegon, obviously oblivious to her because he sees her as his little sisters weird friend/neighbor but he accidentally OD’s. The OC manages to save him by rushing to him and getting him to a hospital. Aegon wakes up and is majorly thankful. Aegon and the OC start to become friends and then very quickly secretly date. Things get out of hand and the OC gets pregnant, and she has to tell Aegon. Aegon starts freaking out not wanting the responsibility and basically tells her to literally get rid of it. Helena finds out about the pregnancy and starts freaking out and gets super mad at the OC and leaves her. The OC tells Alicent but Alicent is way more forgiving and is shoot to have her first grandchild, and tells the OC that she is always welcome to stay if she wants. The OC feels abandoned and scared, etc. That’s all I have for this idea, it sort of just poured right out of my head lol. If you think of an ending or anything extra for the story please feel free add it, I sort of lost momentum of inspiration behind the idea towards the end ( ass you can see lol).

Aegon Targaryen*Neighbour

Pairing: modern!aegon x f!reader

Word count: 2785

Warnings: sad aegon, drunk aegon, high aegon, substance abuse, addiction, over dose, hospitals, flirty aegon, mentions of sex, mentions of pregnancy, fighting parents (nothing graphic or descriptive), one bed trope, angst

Masterlist Here

Your stomach tied itself in knots as your parents’ car stopped behind the moving truck. “Ready to see our new home?” your mum asked but your six-year-old legs were already flinging you out of the car to run up to your new front porch.

“Its huge!” You yelled as you barrelled up to the front door, your dad not far behind with keys in hand so you could run inside to go place dibs on your room.

“I pick the back room!” you called as you ran back down the stairs however your mouth quickly tightened closed when you saw the woman in the doorway. You made your way behind your dad’s leg as he laughed, placing his hand on your head.

“This is our neighbour Alicent sweetheart,”

“Hiya, its nice to meet you,” she smiled before glancing behind her and sighing, “Come inside Aegon. Show our new neighbours what we brought,” You grabbed onto your father tighter however your grip relaxed as the nine-year-old blonde boy walked in with a plate of cookies. “Why don’t you give them to the girl?”

Aegon outstretched the plate to you, and you gladly accepted the wrapped-up treats, “Thank you,” you grinned a toothy smile at the older boy who looked like he was itching to get back to the ball he’d been forced to leave behind to come say hello.

-

Aegon was your first crush however as you grew up you realised how wrong that was. When you were 12 and he 15 you became a little bit obsessed with him however you also experienced your first heart break. Your window was directly opposite from Aegon’s and one night while doing homework you looked up to see him kissing another girl. Sure, you were 12 and he barely knew you apart from you being his little sister’s best friend however you were heart broken still.

It didn’t help that the older you got the dumber he seemed to get. You were privy to all his dirty little secrets because he never remembered to close his blinds when him and his friends all shared three beers or when they passed around their first joint. It got a bit better when he went to college however the summer, he came back you had to race to close your blinds nearly every night when he’d bring a girl over.

By 18 you were completely over your crush and desperate to go to college and get away from Aegon. However, the summer before your first and Aegon’s last year of college you spent a lot of time with Heleana at her house.

Alicent had finally convinced Viserys to add a pool in during the spring and it was nice and ready the day summer break rolled around. In preparation you and Heleana had went swimsuit shopping and had even picked up pool games to play with Daeron who was now 7.

Aemond, who was 19, returned the day before Aegon and greeted you with a warm hug and an offer to fetch you a shirt, “That thing barely covers you,” he rolled his eyes as all four of you tested out the pool.

“Perv much?” you joked as you relaxed into the water as Heleana cannonballed in for the seventh time.

“Stay back Aem,” Heleana said as she swam to your side, flinging her arm over your shoulder, “She’s mine,”

You laughed at her joke, even playing into it as you always did, but Aemond scoff, “Don’t worry about me. Its Aegon your gonna have to worry about,”

“Yeah right,” you scoffed back, “he barely knows I exist,”

Heleana rolled her eyes at both of you, “Yeah right. Besides I already told her that if she gets with either of you, I will murder you both,”

You laughed at her, but Aemond decided to swim up to your side to annoy her more, “But what if she’s my one true love?” he dramatically swooned back but you decided to take it a step further and push him back into the water. Aemond came floundering back to the surface with a scowl as you both cackled, “I take it back. You can keep her,”

-

However, what you didn’t realise was Aegon decided to come home a day early and as you and Aemond were sat at the side of the pool, exhausted and wet, watching Daeron to make sure he didn’t drown Aegon was watching you through the kitchen window.

“Holy fuck,” he murmured when he saw you in your bikini, something he didn’t think you even owned. Then again, he also didn’t know that you had a figure apparently cause right now all he could think was oh damn and to make a mental note to burn all your sweatshirts.

However, Heleana had just decided to go to the kitchen for juice when she saw her brothers’ stares. “Oh, hell no,” she snapped, swatting at her brother’s shoulder.

“Hey! The fuck?”

“You are not fucking my friend- “

“I wasn’t going to- “

“Uhuh, keep it that way,” she scowled as she grabbed the jug of juice Alicent had prepared for you all, “I swear to god Aegon if you even try anything I will kill you. kill you dead.”

-

That summer was a newfound torture for Aegon. Seeing you at his house near every day in a bathing suit was a sick twisted punishment from god. Especially since even when you weren’t there you were lounging in your room in a tank top and shorts with the window cracked open. In a way it was payback it was just a shame you never caught his stares.

-

When college rolled around, he thought he was saved but that was until he saw you around campus. Yep, just both of your luck. While you did your best to look the other way anytime you saw him the longer, he saw you around campus the harder it was for him not to stare. Glow up didn’t even describe the change you had. He was mesmerised. So, in typical Aegon fashion he decided to dive into a bottle blondes’ bed and close his eyes pretending it was you on their knees in front of him.

-

One night you decided to kick back and relax. you had just handed in your last assignment before winter break and thought your first frat party would be a great way to celebrate. You and Sansa, your roommate, got all dolled up and headed to her older brother’s frat, Sansa figured it meant at least this way you knew you were both safe since Robb would be there.

The music was already blaring, the drinks flowing like waterfalls, and the dancing was questionable at best. You and Sansa had met up with a couple friends and were half dancing half talking when you felt a strong arm sling its way over your shoulder, “Look who it is!” Aegon slurred in your ear. “My favourite little neighbour,” he said, his drunken hand moving to squish your cheeks.

You pushed him off of you as you turned round while your friends shared a concerned look. Youd never told them you knew the best tight end of the football team after all. “Hey Aegon. You all good?” you asked, eyes squinting when you saw how bloodshot his were.

“Yeah totally,” he said, his eyes searching the room at a million miles an hour, “Hey I was thinking you should- “he started to say, putting his arm around your shoulder again when Robb came over, “Hey man!” he said, leaving your side to bear hug Robb.

“Hey buddy,” Robb said as he pushed Aegon to arms distance, “You are doing, okay?”

“Never better,” Aegon said, his body now swaying. Robb pulled him in, whispering something in his ear with a stern face before helping him to walk towards the stairs.

Sansa looked to you with a disgusted face, “What a riot,” she said, all the girls agreeing with her, “Can’t believe you need to deal with him,”

“Yeah. He’s a good guy though. Deep down I think,” you said, remembering all the time Heleana told you about their parents screaming matches where Aegon would take them into the basement to have a movie night. Or how his father locked him outside after he failed an exam. Hell, you’d seen the sleeping around and drinking get worse ever since Viserys had died five years ago.

Your friends laughing snapped you out of your thoughts. “Ill be back guys,” you said, heading to the stairs to try find him.

As you searched the corridors you knocked on each door and received a “occupied,” called back at you. that was till you got to this door. you knocked but no one replied. Something didn’t feel right though so you knocked again, “Aegon?” you called but there was no response. Something inside you wouldn’t let you leave so you took a deep breath and tried the door handle.

The door slowly crept open, and you felt your skin flush cold, “Aegon!”

-

You weren’t sure why you got in the back of the ambulance or why you stayed at the hospital while the doctors took him back, but you almost cried in relief when they said you could see him. He looked as white as a ghost, his lips dried and cracked, dark red rings around his eyes, as he laid in the hospital bed.

“Aegon?” you whispered, half wondering if he was dead since he defiantly did not look alive.

“Where am I?” he murmured, his eyes struggling to open, “What happened?”

“Careful,” you said, moving to stop him from sitting up. Aegon’s eyes finally opened, and he stared up at you in shock as you sat on the side of his hospital bed, “You’re in the hospital. You had an overdose,” you told him, figuring it was best to tell him sooner than later.

A million thoughts looked like they were buzzing behind his eyes, but he only asked one thing, “Did they call my mom?”

-

Aegon begged you not to tell his family. apparently, he’d deliberately changed his emergency contact to his father’s number when he fell into a coma so that no one would ever receive a call. This of course made you press on how many times things like this happened and you never seen him look so ashamed.

“Let me help you,” you begged, “We can get you into therapy and- “

“I don’t need it- “

“Damn it Aegon!” you snapped, “You’re lying in a hospital bed with tubes coming out of you and you don’t think there’s a fucking problem?” his head dropped, his eyes welling with tears, and you felt your heart drop. You sighed, your own tears building, “I’m sorry Aegon I just-I just worry about you. I want you to be happy and healthy and just- I want you to get better,” you said, reaching for his hand.

Aegon took yours, squeezing it gently but you knew it took way more strength than you could imagine, “Thank you,” he whispered, his voice hoarse and threatening to break, “for coming to find me. If I was you, I wouldn’t have,”

“It’s a good thing you’re not me then,” you joked, and you saw a tiny smile crack onto his lips, “but the only way I won’t tell your family is if you do something about it. otherwise, you’re gonna leave me no choice,”

-

Aegon took your words to heart and with a little push from you and help from the hospital he had a therapist within a couple of weeks. Turns out when he’s not out drinking and whoring, he’s actually a pretty chill guy. You began to hang out and even when you went back home for winter break, he kept texting you nonstop. While Heleana found it weird her brother was suddenly so close with you, she was also just relieved to see him sober.

Still, you tried to take a step back, but you found yourself weirdly missing him. You ended up going back to college together in his car to save your parents the trip and took turns driving. The whole way you were both scream singing Taylor swift or giving dramatic renditions of Lana del ray songs. Then you realised the sun was setting.

“There’s a motel 3 miles up. Do you want to just stop? I hate driving at night,” you said and Aegon agreed before turning cruel summer back up to full blast.

You both grabbed a couple things out the car before heading into the classic movie run down looking hotel. The receptionist was halfway through her cigarette and the whole room screamed the 60s with faded orange polka dot walls. “Hey, can we get two rooms?” Aegon asked as he fished out his credit card.

She tapped her long red nails at the ‘cash only’ sign before turning to the computer as you know both pulled out whatever cash you had. “Sorry Hun we only half one room,”

You felt your cheeks tinge as Aegon awkwardly cleared his throat, “Is it a twin?”

“Nope it’s a double,” she said as she peered over her glasses at you both, “Is that gonna be a problem?”

Aegon glanced at you but the idea of driving any further as your eyes were barely staying open made you grab his cash and slam it on the counter, “We’ll make it work,”

-

The room was as nice as you could expect. Though you did make Aegon triple check it for murderers as you guarded the door. “All safe. So…” he said, words trailing off as he looked at the bed.

You sighed as you dumped your stuff on the ground, “So,” you said as you plopped on the bed.

“I could sleep in the car- “

“Just get in the bed Aegon,” you sighed as you pulled off your trainers, “I mean we’ve known each other for years,”

He nodded but paused for another moment before asking once more, “Are you sure? Cause I get if you want me to sleep on the floor,”

You laughed a little at his words as you finally kicked off your shoes. “Its fine. Promise. I trust you,” you began to take off your jumper when you realised, he hadn’t said anything, “You okay?”

“Yeah,” he said as if snapping out of a daze, “Just can’t think of a time someone said that” he said it like a joke, but you could see in his eyes it wasn’t.

As tempting as it was to make a joke to try lightening the mood you just gave him the best smile you could before excusing yourself to the bathroom to get ready for bed. Aegon went in after you and as he was sorting himself out you took off your bra and jeans and slipped under the sheets in just your shirt.

Aegon came back a couple minutes later as you scrolled your phone. Silently he took off his shirt and you did your best not to stare or even look but it was near impossible. Him slipping under the covers however snapped you out your daze when you felt his almost bare, bar his boxers, legs brush against yours.

You glanced over at him and saw his cheeks tinged a bright pink as he cleared his throat, “You tired?” he asked, staring at the ceiling.

You smiled a little at him. After all it had been you acting like that for years without him ever noticing. “A bit. You?” he just hummed in response. You sighed before rolling onto your side facing him, “Aegon?”

“Yeah?” he replied as he turned to face you, his nose accidentally brushing yours in the process. You could feel his breath fanning your face as his eyes bore into yours. up close you could really see the lilac in them.

You weren’t sure who leaned in first, but you felt his soft lips press against yours as his hands trailed up your sides. Your hands found his white, blonde hair, admiring how soft it was as your mouths mixed. You knew your best friend would kill you if she ever found out but suddenly that didn’t feel important.

-

Dating your best friend’s brother in secret at a university across state was wrong. You knew it, Aegon knew it, if Heleana knew about it, she’d scream it, but you couldn’t stop yourself. Suddenly every waking moment was spent with Aegon. Everything was going perfectly bar the little white lie you kept from Heleana.

That was until the two pink lines showed up in the bathroom.

Part two here

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[maraschinomerry]

Meddling Git

Pairings: George Karim x gn!reader

Summary: When George connects with Arif's new shop assistant, Lockwood makes it his mission to make more opportunities for them to meet

Content: fluff, meddling Lockwood, insecurity about agent work, slight mention of blood

A/N: I'm back!! After an unintentional 7 month hiatus, I've finally been inspired to write again! I've also decided to switch from using (name) to y/n if anyone has any opinions on that. Thank you to everyone who shared anniversary/meet content for reminding me how much I love this fandom, and all my love to the multiverse of George chat for giving me so much inspiration and encouragement 💛

Word count: 4k exactly!

Taglist: @neewtmas @marinalor @ettadear @honey-with-tea @mischiefmanaged71 and also tagging @bobbys-not-that-small @bella-rose29 @oblivious-idiot @uku-lelevillain @lewkwoodnco

Lockwood, Lucy and George marched proudly towards Arif's. They'd completed another house call and been tipped generously by the owner, so Lockwood had promised to treat the team to breakfast. Of course, with the first rays of the morning only just beginning to peek through the clouds, there weren't any cafes open yet.

“I'll cook,” George offered, “as long as you buy the ingredients…”

“Of course.”

“...and those strawberry cream doughnuts.”

“Fine,” Lockwood rolled his eyes dramatically. Lucy grinned.

The bell above the door rang out lightly. Only agents would be around at this hour, and Lockwood & Co was the only agency who ever came to Arif's. In fact, their presence was so regular that the boy who worked the morning shift, Max, would greet them before they even came into view. Today, however, the shop remained silent.

“Morning, Max!” Lockwood called over a shelf when the quiet lasted a moment too long. “I don't suppose you have any of the strawb-” He hesitated as the group rounded the corner and finally came into view of the counter.

—

You frowned a little to yourself at the gentle chime of the bell. Surely there wouldn't be anybody about this early? Though you couldn't see the front door from behind the counter (a bit of a security flaw, you reckoned) there was a small window to your left which showed only the slightest hint of sunlight. Then again, Arif had mentioned a group of agents that would come by often. You weren't aware there was a local agency, but you were so new to both the area and the job that you didn't like to question it. The bell had been followed by overlapping footsteps and more than one hushed voice. Maybe this was them.

“Morning, Max!” one of the voices suddenly spoke up, a little deeper than you expected but unmistakably that of a boy and not a man. The footsteps drew closer. “I don't suppose you have any of the strawb-” At last the owner of the voice appeared from behind a shelf. The words stuttered to a stop, as did the movements of the tall boy in the black overcoat. Behind him, a girl in a blue jumper almost ran into him with the sudden pause.

“You're not Max,” she stated bluntly.

“No, I'm not.”

“Is he…?”

“Moved back to Cornwall with his parents,” you reassured her. You knew what it was like, wondering whether someone's absence meant the Problem had claimed another victim. “I'm y/n.”

“Well,” the boy cut back in with a charming smile, “morning, y/n. I'm Lockwood, this is Lucy, and George is around somewhere. As I was saying, do you happen to have any of those strawberry cream doughnuts?”

You returned his smile with one of your own as you fetched a square box from the chilled cabinet. “You're in luck, but I suppose you'll have to fight over who gets the fourth.”

“We won't,” another boy piped up from the far corner of the shop - George, you assumed. “If I'm making breakfast, I'm calling dibs.” Lucy giggled and you felt yourself suppressing one of your own.

“You'll have to forgive George, he's-” Lockwood began.

“No, no, he's got a point.”

“Finally, somebody gets it!” George's voice sounded triumphant, and much closer than before. After a beat, he arrived and you were able to put a face to the voice.

George was taller than Lucy but a little shorter than Lockwood, with dark curly hair and round glasses. Under his jacket was a vibrantly orange T-shirt, and in his arms he cradled a carton of eggs and a few different vegetables. He shuffled closer, attempting to place the produce on the counter without dropping the eggs but having trapped his hand in too awkward a position to keep a good hold of them.

“Let me,” you found yourself leaning over the counter, your fingers brushing the crook of his elbow as you rescued the carton and set it down gently. The boy blinked at you in surprise before quickly recovering and placing down the bulb of garlic he was holding. “What are you making?”

“Gojeh farangi, a sort of omelette.”

“Sounds good.” You handed him the ingredients, now bagged, and slid the box of doughnuts towards him as well. Lockwood stepped forwards with a handful of cash, and George shrunk back.

“It's been a pleasure meeting you, y/n,” Lockwood gave you another of those smiles. You got the sense he was the head of the team, the diplomat, the charisma. “No doubt we'll see you again.”

“Nice to meet you all too. I'll be here most mornings, in case you want to beat the regular crowd to the good doughnuts.” Without realising, you found yourself directing the latter part to the other boy, and you could have sworn you saw a flush tint his cheeks as he gave a slight smile and a nod of acknowledgement. What you didn't see was the glance exchanged by the other two.

—

The trio were back at Portland Row, the kitchen filled with the smell of fresh tomatoes and the glow of a job well done.

“Y/n seemed nice,” Lucy remarked as casually as possible.

“Mm,” Lockwood agreed into his cup of tea. “What did you think, George?”

They turned their attention quite unsubtly to their friend at the oven. He stayed with his back to them, and they couldn't be sure it was just because he was focused on breakfast, as he shrugged. “Suppose so. Didn't get much chance to judge.” He turned at last, not making eye contact as he slid two plates across the table.

“Ah well,” Lockwood continued after thanking George, who had turned away to collect his own plate, and he took the opportunity to throw Lucy a conspiratorial wink. “Plenty of time for that.”

Lucy almost choked on her mouthful.

The next day, George was halfway down the main stairs on the way to the training room when Lockwood poked his head out of his room. His hair was dishevelled, the collar of his shirt was wide open and his tie was hanging loosely around his neck.

“Ah, George! Do me a favour and run down to Arif's? We're out of detergent.”

“Why can't you go?”

“I've got that meeting with Mrs Pemberley to go over the details of the case and I'm running late as it is.”

“And Lucy-”

“Has gone to see Barnes.”

“Right.”

George held the door open for an elderly man just leaving the shop before slipping inside. He made his way to the detergent, stopping for a packet of chocolate digestives. Seeing you at the counter made him falter a little. You'd said you worked mornings, but it was almost lunchtime and he thought someone might have taken over by now.

“Oh, hello,” you greeted him cheerily. “Didn't hear you come in. George, right? Are your friends with you?”

“Just me,” George huffed. You picked up on the huff and wondered whether he was just having a bad day. From the small interaction you'd had yesterday, he seemed to get on well with his fellow agents and his annoyance was playfully exaggerated. Was it too soon to play along? You'd only met him yesterday. Then again, it was ordinary enough for shop workers to make conversation with the customers, and you wanted to at least try and make an effort at this new job.

“One of those days?” you prompted.

“Tell me about it.” The response was dry but not sarcastic, and you got the sense that he would have opened up more if he knew you better.

“Surely these will help,” you held up the biscuits as you passed them back to him, which earned you a slight smile. That was all you got, however, as he paid and walked away with only a muttered thanks. For some reason, you found yourself fishing for a way to make him stay and talk more. There weren't many people your age who came by while you were on shift (not many people at all, to be honest), as most of them worked the night shifts and barely went out and about until later in the afternoon. You just wanted someone, anyone, to talk to, and he was right there and getting further away by the second. Plus, you couldn't deny you were intrigued.

“Can I ask you something?” you blurted.

The boy turned, curiosity colouring his gaze. For a moment, you thought he'd still leave, but he came towards you and placed the detergent bottle back on the counter with a thud. You continued, “Which agency do you all work for? I noticed your rapiers yesterday, and Arif mentioned you being in the area, but I wasn't sure where."

George brightened. “We're Lockwood & Co, on Portland Row.”

—

A few more days passed, and the longer it went on the more George was unable to stop thinking about the new shop assistant. There was something about their question - most people didn't pay much notice to off-duty agents, much less care about which agency they were from. Sure, Arif had mentioned or warned them about Lockwood & Co, so perhaps it was just polite conversation, but they'd seemed genuinely invested in the answer. And with the shop opening in the early hours specifically for agents, it often took someone with Talent of their own to be brave enough to be out so early. Maybe…

His thoughts were interrupted by Lucy wandering into the study. She flopped into the armchair opposite, trying not to pay too much attention when George peered at her over the top of his book.

“Everything okay?” he asked. It wasn't often Lucy joined him for research.

“Lockwood's going to buy food so I thought I'd come and hang out with you. Don't mind me,” she shrugged. George took that rather literally, turning his attention back to the book on his lap. In the distance, they heard the front door open and close again, marking Lockwood's exit.

Lucy spoke again. “Oh, I almost forgot! He said we're out of cornflour but can he just use baking powder instead?”

George's eyes widened, and Lucy heard him mutter something particularly cutting as he dropped his book onto the arm of the chair and darted from the room. Moments later, the front door sounded again.

Lockwood turned in his stride and met George with a sharp grin, almost like he was expecting the other boy to come after him.

“I take it we do need cornflour, then?”

“You're such an idiot.” George fell into step beside him, and the two walked quietly for a while. George wondered whether it was worth going back to the house at all after this or whether to carry on to the Archives; it was early enough in the day that they might not be full yet. At least it would mean not being a part of whatever scheme his friend seemed to be cooking up.

—

You were greeted by Lockwood remarkably quickly after the bell alerted you to his presence, but he barely got a word in before you apologised, explaining that you hadn't meant to be rude when you first met, you just didn't know the agency to put his name to it.

“It was only when George explained-”

Almost as if you'd summoned him, the curly-haired boy stepped into view and gave you a small nod.

Lockwood's grinned, wider than before. “You didn't tell me you'd been chatting to y/n, mate.” He turned his attention back to you. “You must have quite the impact if you're getting more out of him than I am.”

A glowing warmth spread through your cheeks, and instinctively your eyes flew to George, whose expression reflected your own. The other boy glanced between you both with delight. “I suppose so,” you mumbled. “I was just curious because-”

“You have Talent.” It was George who had spoken, and he moved forward with his gaze levelled on yours. The words were spoken not as a question or a statement, more like a realisation. It struck you that behind the unassuming first impression the boy gave off was a quiet but brilliant intelligence for him to have figured you out so quickly. Very few people ever figured you out at all, especially not about your Talent.

“How did you know?”

George seemed to suddenly realise how close he'd come, practically leaning over the counter to study you; he pulled away and dragged his gaze to his shoes. “Educated guess.”

Lockwood, on the other hand, was having none of it, eyeing you up mischievously. “Don't be so modest,” he elbowed his friend in the ribs. You tried very hard not to fixate on the way the movement tightened his shirt across his chest and waist. “He's not our researcher for nothing, he's a genius.”

George sighed, but his head lifted with a burst of confidence. “I figured you must to feel safe working here before dawn, I just wasn't sure why you're not an agent. Oh, and the iron cross above the counter is new.”

There wasn't a single other person this week who'd noticed the cross you installed on your first day. This boy was really something.

“Wow,” you breathed subconsciously. George's cheeks reddened; this time he was definitely blushing. As for why you weren't an agent, what were you supposed to say? That you were less scared of the Visitors than you were of never finding your place within a team or worse, finding the right people but then losing them? How could you possibly explain that to him? So you didn't, and after a few more pleasantries Lockwood headed for the door. George threw you a backwards glance and a small wave, and the butterflies that had appeared in your stomach waved back.

Lockwood was positively beaming as they stepped out into the midday sun. Golden rays danced across his face, the air was mild, a soft breeze ruffled through his coat. It was all far too cheerful.

“What's got into you?” George frowned. “I haven't seen you this happy since we watched Kipps fall over his own rapier.”

“Am I not allowed to be happy?” Lockwood feigned outrage, clutching his chest. “And it's you that I'm happy for!”

George stopped. “What?”

“Come on, I've known you long enough to see there's something between you and y/n. Why don't you ask them out?”

“It's not like that! We've only spoken a couple of times, I don't know them well enough for anything like that.”

“If you say so…”

—

God, Lockwood was insufferable. He'd abandoned all subtlety, and it was driving George up the wall.

The smell of strong black coffee drifted up the stairs as George drifted down them. Lockwood had booked a big case for that night with absolutely no background information, so he'd spent the whole night on initial research. Hopefully caffeine would keep him awake long enough to get through the day.

Lucy was standing by the toaster, wielding a butter knife and humming to herself. George slumped into his usual chair with a groan.

“Coffee? Toast?” she offered.

“Please.”

“Sorry,” Lockwood appeared from the basement. “That's the last of the bread, you'll need to pick up more while you're out today.”

“You're joking,” George looked up. “There's still three slices in the bag there.” This was the third time this week he'd pulled something like this. The first was ‘accidentally’ stepping on an entire packet of biscuits. The second was announcing the milk was off, pouring it down the drain before anyone could check with enough force that it splashed back and went all over his trousers. And now this.

Lucy opened her mouth to respond, but Lockwood was faster. Before anyone could react, he pulled out the remaining slices, folded them all in half and took a massive bite. When he unfolded them, it left a gaping hole down the middle of all three slices, which he held up and peeked through triumphantly.

“You're ridiculous,” George scowled.

“ ‘m miwwian’” Lockwood mumbled around the wad of bread in his mouth.

George wanted to put his foot down. He didn't want to let Lockwood win. He knew he'd be so smug about it. But he also knew that every time he was sent to Arif's he stayed a little longer, talked a little more, watched you smile a little brighter. As much as he didn't want to admit it, he'd started looking forward to being sent out for things.

“Oh hey, Georgie!” Your face lit up when he entered the shop, and he smiled back. You weren't sure when you'd started calling him Georgie, he'd been here so often it was hard to tell which day was which any more. Not that you were complaining - he was easy to talk to, more interested in your Talent than anyone else had been, understanding when you'd finally explained your concerns about becoming an agent, and undeniably cute on top of all that. “What do you need today?”

“A boss who's not a meddling git,” he scowled dramatically, “...and milk.”

“I can only help with the second one,” you teased as you made your way out to the shop floor. Speaking to him from behind a counter felt so impersonal now, so you'd taken to wandering round the shop with him. You really hoped he didn't think you were overstepping or anything. As far as you knew, he thought of you as just the shop assistant, nothing more. You hoped it was more than that, could be more at least.

Another customer came and went, and George was still there, enraptured by your opinions on the Problem. He'd taken up a stance leaning against the shelves, one hand tucked into his pocket and looking the most relaxed you'd seen him since that first time he came into the shop. A light smile played across his face as he watched you hop onto the counter, not breaking your train of thought at all.

“I should get on before my shift finishes,” you sighed eventually. George immediately stepped forward and offered his hand to help you climb back down. His skin was warm and slightly calloused. You stumbled a little as you hit the ground and his other hand flew to your elbow, eyes scanning yours in concern.

“Thanks,” you murmured, painfully aware of how close you were. You'd put your hand out to steady yourself; it was clutching at the soft fabric of his orange plaid shirt. His eyes met yours once more and you both hastily pulled away.

“I'd better get back,” he cleared his throat.

“To the meddling git?”

He chuckled, a low sound which rumbled pleasantly in his chest. “Exactly. We're, um, we're out on another case tonight, but I'll see you soon, okay?”

“I hope so,” you replied, hoping he knew you didn't just mean because he made it back safely. “We'll have those doughnuts you like again tomorrow, if you're back in time.”

“I'll definitely be here for that,” he grinned.

—

It had been a hell of a night. The man who hired them had tried to bolster his ego by downplaying how intense the Visitors were. ‘A couple of Type 1s’ had turned out to be three particularly vicious Type 2s and it had taken until dawn to neutralise all the sources. The team emerged into the dewy morning covered in dust, rubble and, in George's case, blood. He'd taken a piece of debris to the face and, while it wasn't a serious injury, it had left him with a small cut which throbbed when he spoke. They were quite far from home too, and it was almost midday before they made it back to Portland Row.

George flopped onto a sofa in the living room as soon as they were through the door, while Lucy fetched the first aid kit. She sat down next to him, clicking open the case, and her face paled even more than it had with the exhaustion.

“We're out of antiseptic.”

“Lockwood,” George glared at his friend. He really wasn't in the mood.

“This isn't me this time! Look, you stay here and rest, I'll go and get more. Anything else we need?”

George pushed himself up to his feet. At least venting to you might make him feel better, and you had promised him doughnuts. “It's fine, I'll go.” Lockwood glanced at Lucy, taken aback by his insistence. He'd only been teasing George about going to see you, he never expected it to actually work.

“Please tell me you've still got those doughnuts, y/n,” George groaned as he pushed open the door to Arif's.

“Sorry,” came the reply from a voice distinctly unlike yours, as Arif glanced up from the shelf he was reorganising. “They took the last box at the end of their shift, maybe ten minutes ago.”

The last glimmer of hope that George had harboured fizzled out in his chest. Of course there was going to be no silver lining to the day. He was tired, he was hurt, and he didn't even get the doughnuts he'd been holding out for. Worse than that, though, he finally admitted to himself (and practically to his friends too) that he wanted to see you, that he liked you, and for what? Of course you weren't, you'd finished work and why on earth would you stick around just in case he showed up? It was unreasonable, he knew, but he couldn't help but feel disappointed. He'd have to wait until tomorrow, when he'd recovered a bit and could have a proper chat to you about everything. Ranting with Lockwood and Lucy was alright - they'd been there, they knew what he went through - but you were so gentle and understanding with him every time that he was desperate to hear your thoughts.

A figure on the steps of 35 Portland Row made George stop in his tracks. A new client, perhaps. Nothing unusual there.

The figure turned.

“Georgie?”

His face split into a grin the instant he recognised you. You'd changed out of your plain uniform into more casual clothes. The vibrant colours made you look almost radiant.

“Y/n, what are you doing here?”

You shuffled awkwardly on the step, suddenly aware of just how much of a risk you were about to take.

“When you didn't show up this morning… well, I was worried about you on the case. And I know I said I was scared of becoming an agent in case I made friends with my team and then lost them, but I realised I could just as easily lose you like this and I'd never get to really know…” George watched you in awe, silently gravitating closer with every breath. Your own breath was trembling, the sound of it echoing from your chest up to your ears. Finally, he was close enough that you noticed the stark red line on his cheek. “Oh my god, you're hurt.” Just imagining him in pain sent ice through your veins.

“I'm okay,” he assured you gently. “Just a scratch. I've just been to Arif's for antiseptic and…” he looked almost as nervous to speak as you, “I missed seeing you.”

You wanted to reach out to him, to take his hand or hug him close, but instead you held up the box you'd forgotten you were holding. “Me too. I brought those doughnuts just in case, figured you might need the extra one.”

His expression softened. “It's not an extra if you're here. I mean, if you want? You could come in and we can share them with the rest of the team.” Team. He gave you a look that showed he meant the implication behind it. You were one of them now, if you wanted to be. With a smile, you wound the fingers of your free hand into his and allowed him to lead you into the house.

[wheredidhiseyebrowsgo]

Do you have any recs where Derek is absolutely in love with stiles but, stiles is completely oblivious? If you know any other fics like that but a different ship I'll take those too!

Yeeeesss!

Hindsight (Ok yeah, it all makes sense now) by Eternalsterek24

(1/1 I 3,269 I Teen)

In hindsight, Stiles should have recognized that the pack was keeping something from him. The problem, though, was that when you have weird friends, you don’t think anything of it when they act weird. 

Game On by stilinskisparkles

(1/1 I 6,391 I Teen)

Derek first sees him from across the quad four days into fall semester. He’s sitting on one of the long benches, a marker pen in his mouth, grinning at something the kid lounging on the bench beside him is saying. When he laughs properly he pulls the pen out and throws his head back, his neck a long, lean line Derek is entranced by. He flicks the page in his book and highlights something, tossing the cap up in the air and catching it with his teeth.

Show Me The Way Back Home Baby by stilinskisparkles 

(1/1 I 14,968 I Teen)

In which Lydia and Jackson produce the world's cutest baby, and the pack goes crazy-- the good kind of crazy. Except for Derek, who is afraid of tiny cute babies and Stiles who plans to be the best Uncle ever. Even if Danny called dibs on Godfather.

Mating Habits of the Domesticated North American Werewolf by lielabell

(5/5 I 35,458 I Mature)

Derek doesn’t do pining. He doesn’t. So when it becomes clear that Stiles is much more interested in having Derek as a new best friend than a boyfriend, he puts on his big boy pants and makes it fucking work. He becomes the best goddamn friend a spastic teenager could ever hope to have.

To Build a Pack by Arieanna

(9/? I 53,294 I Mature)

Derek feels a pull in his chest, and it's a pack bond to Stiles. He thought the young man had betrayed him along with Scott, but finding out the truth, he makes Stiles a part of his pack. Now, with the pack coming together in a healthy way, they help Stiles discover that he's not just a sidekick, but a major player, and more important than Scott had ever given him credit for.

The more Derek pulls Stiles into the pack as his second, though, the harder it is to ignore the feelings that he's been having for the boy since they met. Stiles, on the other hand, has fallen out of love with Lydia, and can't figure out just why that happen

All the Weird Kids (Know How to Take it Slow) by Ionaonie

(26/26 I 112,477 I General)

Stiles never thought being part of a werewolf Pack would end up being so normal. Even being around Derek had a degree of normality about it. Even if he was still an overbearing jerk most of the time.

run and hide by whiry

(36/36 I 174,966 I Teen)

"Unlike Derek, Stiles still remembers the first time they met. He remembers the confusion at the pull in his chest, tugging him to the boy with big ears and light eyes. He’d been in the grocery store with his mother and Derek with his, and they had all been minding their business, but Stiles had a niggling in the back of his head directing him toward Derek. And when their eyes met for the first time? Stiles’ heart about exploded. He remembers grabbing his chest and gasping and his mother running over and Derek’s mother running over. The boys didn’t even say anything, and poor Derek looked so confused, and Talia and Claudia simply looked at their boys, looked at each other, and immediately set up a time to meet. And that was how it started."

or, stiles and derek suck at being mates, a new threat comes to town, and stiles has to desperately try to save everything he's ever loved from total destruction all while trying to get through his sophomore year unscathed.

[emeraldspiral]

Episode where Zim is out in his kid disguise instead of one of his adult/old man disguises and someone takes notice of him trying to go somewhere he shouldn't. They come up and ask him "Young man, you know you're not supposed to be here without adult supervision. Where are you parents?" Frustrated that someone would dare disrupt his evil plans, Zim forgets his cover story and blurts out "I don't have parents!"

"Oh, I'm sorry. How long ago did you lose them?"

"Fool! I have never had parents."

"You mean you've been an orphan all your life? That's terrible!"

"It is not terrible! It's great! I have no need for guardianship or supervision."

"So there's no one looking after you?"

"Zim needs no one! Now rescind your pity human!"

"Oh no! It's so much worse than I thought. You poor brave boy. Don't worry, you won't have to be alone for much longer!"

And then the interloper calls child services, who forcibly place Zim in an orphanage. He can't take back anything he said about being an orphan before because neither he nor the Roboparents have social security numbers and their address and phone number aren't registered anywhere.

A couple quickly comes looking to adopt and they decide they want to take on the challenge of a "problem child" who's not likely to get adopted by anyone else. So they take Zim home with them for a trial adoption. Initially it seems like it's going to turn into something like Orphan where the nice family is oblivious to the danger Zim presents as he plans to make them into his latest test subjects. But just as Zim's about to implant some questionable device into one of the family members, something happens that freaks Zim out so much he loses his nerve.

He becomes increasingly anxious as the family members never give him a moment alone, following him from room to room constantly pestering him to ask if he's okay.

"Do you like this show? We could switch to a different channel."

"Is it too cold for you? We could turn the thermostat up."

"Would you like some hot cocoa? Some warm milk, perhaps? Soda?"

"Hey, we were thinking of Mac & Cheese for dinner tonight. But do you have any dietary concerns? Are you lactose intolerant? Gluten-free? Vegan? Diabetic?"

"Are you okay with the volume everyone is speaking at? We could speak softer if you want."

"OR LOUDER IF YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE HEARING US!"

"Do you need a blanket?"

"We bought you some pajamas. But we can take them back if you don't like them."

"Do you want to talk about your feelings?"

"You know this is a safe place, right?"

"Don't be afraid to speak up if there's anything you need."

"Or if there's anything you want to talk about."

"We're always here to lend an ear."

Zim gets majorly creeped out and is convinced they're really human spies trying to get him to reveal himself and give away Irken military secrets.

He tries to get some privacy, but the only place where he can be alone is the bathroom. There's only one, and there are so many family members they have a schedule for who can use it when. But not to worry, they've already rearranged it to give him Thursdays at 3:30 and every other Saturday at 2:00am.

They send him to a new skool, which is much better than the one he went to before. It's clean, well funded with facilities in good repair, and best of all, there's no Dib around to harass him. But the staff at the new skool are far more professional than at the old skool and Zim's new teacher doesn't tolerate classroom disruptions, shocking Zim when he sends him to the principal's office within his first minute of class. At first Zim thinks it's a blessing in disguise because it means time away from his extremely clingy new foster siblings, but the one he shares a class with ends up getting sent to the office on purpose so he could stay by Zim's side. Zim does not appreciate the gesture of solidarity.

Zim comes home and his new foster parents tell him the principal called, but it's okay. They're not mad, they know it's going to take time for him to adjust. They also remind him that it's 3:30 and today is Thursday, which means it's finally his turn to use the bathroom.

He only has fifteen minutes, but he plans on escaping out the window. But it turns out the family have installed a state of the art security system to keep him from escaping. They aren't mad when he trips it though. They understand. Moving into a new home with a bunch of strangers can be scary, and he might think he wants to go back to the life he knew before because the familiarity of it is comforting, but they promise if he just gives them a chance they're sure they can make him happy.

Zim has no choice but to endure the two week trial adoption period. Initially, he figures if he acts like a little shit they won't want to adopt him and he'll get sent back to the orphanage from which he can make an escape. Halfway through however, he has a change of heart. He starts to enjoy regular kid activities like playing video games, family board game night, and riding bikes around the neighborhood, going to skool and learning actually useful and interesting things and not being bullied, having someone come and pick him up when he falls and scrapes his knee and give him an Adhesive Medical Strip and a kiss to make it all better, and the unconditional love and endless patience and forgiveness he's afforded.

He starts to think maybe there's an advantage to the arrangement. He can learn so much more about humans from actually living like one, and surely that would be beneficial to his mission, wouldn't it?

At the end of the two week period, Zim is interviewed and asked if he would like to be permanently adopted. He says "yes", only to be told "That's too bad. It looks like they've decided not to move forward with the adoption." Zim is shocked and dismayed.

"How could they not want Zim?!"

The only answer he gets is that the family "didn't feel like it was the right fit", which leaves Zim perplexed, ruminating over whatever he did wrong to make them not love him.

The episode then ends with the Roboparents coming to the adoption agency to look for a new son. Zim tries to get their attention, but they pass him over for a different prospective child and jet off without him.

[anonymoosen]

ZIMPAI SHIZPOST STORY PART 3!!

Despite that dramatic angst moment, Zim-kun’s oblivious dating sim zim mc brain still could not notice Dib-chan’s desperate attempts to make Zim notice him.

“PEEPEEPOOPOOOPEEPEEEPOOO!!!!” Zim continued in an unhinged manner. Knowing it was no use, Dib just shrugged and gave in.

“P-pookie- I MEAN- p-poopoopeepee…?” Dib stuttered nervously.

Zim raised his handsome eyebrow and smiled even more widely.

“PEEPEEPOOPOOPIE DOOKIE POOOPSKIIESS!!” Zim-kun sang in a surprisingly beautiful opera voice.

In return, Dib chanted back, “PEEWEEWOOOPEEEEEEPOOP DOOKIE PIES!!”

“POOPOO DOOKIE DOO DOOOOM!!”

This went on and on, despite the looks everyone was giving the two boys as they were enjoying themselves too much to even care. What matters is that they were having fun— and at the same time, looking anime.

“PEEEEEEEEE!!” Dib finally squealed in his dorky little goose-like laughter.

When Zim saw that, there was some romantic filter in his eyes with the cherry blossom petals returning, blowing all around Dib-chan in Zim’s vision.

E-EHH?! What is this…? Did the Dib-thing put some curse on me when he said that?! What’s this feeling in my squeedilysPOOOOCH?!?!?

Zim thought to himself, FINALLY getting hit by the feelings he should have realised he has had a long looong time ago…

THE FEELING OF L-

“LOATHE!! YES— ITS NOT LIKE I LIKE YOU OR ANYTHING!!” Zim squeaked out in a tsundere anime girl voice.

Dib tilted his head in confusion.

“Uhhh what…? Also, when the heck did you change into an anime girl dress?”

“S-SHUT UP, YOU- DIBBY BAH-KAH!!” Zim exclaimed and punched Dib in the arm, dashing off.

The bespectacled boy just stood there in a daze, trying to process what kind of development happened in this cheesy cliche love story.

That was when Dib felt a hand on his shoulder to see that it was Gaz.

His sister rolled her eyes and spoke in a sarcastic tone,

“Congratulations, Dib. You shouldn’t have taught him about anime.”

————-

THATS RIGHT YALL!! THIS AINT THE FINAL PART YET!! NOW ITS ZIMS TURN TO BE THE ONE PINNING FOR DIB— TSUNDERE STYLE!

(HELP ME)

FIRST

PREV

NEXT

[silverynight]

Taken

Zenitsu rolls his eyes when a girl approaches him with a bouquet of flowers. No, that wouldn't be his reaction if he thought that was meant for him, but he knows it isn't.

"Since you're Tanjirou's friend could you please–"

"No," he cuts her off, feeling bad when he notices the sad and confused expression on her face. But he knows it's better that way, besides, she'll probably get over it soon since it's just a crush (judging by the way her heart is beating).

"Why?"

"You'll be wasting your time," Zenitsu mumbles and then gestures at her to follow him until they're in the backyard. "He's taken."

He doesn't need to say anything else, she sees it all: Tanjirou is taking a break, sitting on the grass when the flame hashira takes him in his arms and squeezes him until Kocho gets angry and tells him to let him breathe. Tanjirou is not upset at all, he's used to the Pillars forgetting about personal space when it comes to him, even though he has no idea why they do that.

"So, does Rengoku-san..." She doesn't even get to finish because the mist hashira appears and gives Tanjirou a kiss on the cheek. "What? But..."

Zenitsu doesn't say anything at all, he knows she'll figure it out, like everyone does; it's not that difficult to notice since all the hashira are everything but subtle.

"Oh, I get it now..." She mumbles right before Himejima leans closer to Tanjirou to nuzzle affectionately against the redhead's cheek. "They all love him."

Yes, they do, which is why no one else has any chance with Tanjirou. At first Zenitsu thought one of the Pillars would end up being the chosen one, but lately it seems that none of them want to give up on Tanjirou; he's almost sure they all have agreed to share him.

***

Out of the corner of his eye, Zenitsu notices two boys talking to each other; he doesn't need to get closer to know they're speaking of Tanjirou and how pretty he is.

One of them is determined to ask him out, but the idea dies quickly in his mind as he watches Shinazugawa walk in the butterfly estate with a very tired Tanjirou in his arms.

"It's just a scratch, Shinazugawa-san," the redhead assures him. "You need to let the kakushi do their job."

The wind hashira is not letting anyone near Tanjirou, cradling him close to his chest and growling at whomever tries to approach them. Fortunately, Uzui and his wives are there and while Makio scolds Shinazugawa for making everything more difficult, the other two take Tanjirou to one of the recovery rooms.

Uzui kisses the boy's cheek before Aoi and the butterfly girls start patching him up.

"It's a shame he's taken already," the boy mumbles to his friend, before both of them sigh in defeat before leaving the room.

At least Zenitsu didn't have to explain anything this time.

***

Honestly, Zenitsu understands Tanjirou's appeal; he's beautiful, kind and does everything he can to help other people. The problem is that he's unbelievable oblivious and seems to think people just want to be friends with him.

The other problem, for demon slayers and kakushi and most people who develop a crush on him is that all the hashira (deadliest swordsmen alive) have called dibs on him a while ago.

"Why are the cute ones taken?" Zenitsu hears a kakushi girl complain as she watches Tanjirou being squeezed in between Kanroji and Iguro.

"Of course the Pillars take the best ones for themselves!" Another huffs as the love hashira keeps kissing Tanjirou's face before offering him a couple of rice balls.

Not all of them, Zenitsu thinks as he feels relief spread all over his chest and thanks the gods the hashira are so in love with Tanjirou they are incapable of seeing anyone else...

So he can focus on Nezuko.

However, he is glad for his friend, even though sometimes it irritates him the blatant adoration coming from the Pillars, Zenitsu knows they'd do anything for Tanjirou. And he's sure he'll be in good hands, they clearly know how to take care of him.

The only thing he needs to do is to see what's in front of him.

"I have never seen the water hashira being so soft with anyone before," a slayer comments, as Tomioka greets Tanjirou by pulling him into his arms.

The other Pillars arrive then; lately they've been trying to be in the butterfly estate whenever Tanjirou comes back from a mission. It's obvious to anyone who pays a little bit of attention that they want to spend as much time with him as they can.

Even Zenitsu thinks that's kinda sweet.

"I hope he marries them all. I can't imagine him choosing just one; they all love him so much..."

They do. Honestly Zenitsu agrees with the kakushi girl, they adore him too much... As they gather around Tanjirou and the redhead beams at them, Zenitsu realizes that they all are like a big family already.

Maybe it'll take them a while to get to marry him, but Zenitsu is sure they will.

They'll make him happy and honestly Tanjirou deserves all the happiness in the world.

***

Patreon

[istadris]

lm3 seducer luigi au? 👀

@brendathepeep you're to blame for half of the ideas here.

This is going to be a LONG one, so brace yourself!

First Luigi's Mansion : E.Gadd met Luigi by pure luck, and he was willing to go through the house and capture ghosts while looking for his brother. Everybody wins ! But as he monitors Luigi, he notices that the guy isn't just a good ghost hunter. He draws ghosts ! In a very specific way, dare he say.

Dark Moon : the Evershade Valley is a good place to study ghosts and even obtain answers from them, and that's where E.Gadd starts to realize, oh. oh. Ghosts don't just want to scare Luigi, they're attracted to him. He's basically a walking aphrodisiac. So when the ghosts escape, E.Gadd doesn't hesitate : ghosts are less agressive when horny (usually), and Luigi is a good enough ghostbuster to justify calling him.

E.Gadd intended to tell Luigi about it ! He absolutely did ! But how do you explain to your assistant "oh there is an explanation to why ghosts always harass you" ?

Especially when he's running for his life! And he kept forgetting once the menace was dealt with.

He still tried to harness (or even just figure out) that weird power Luigi has but accidentally made a goo clone. Alas, while Gooigi does attract ghosts, he's not sturdy enough for further examination. After Gooigi reforms from a ghost spilling fluids (not necessarily their own) on him : "dang it, it seems I will need Luigi's consent on this matter after all"

Luigi's Mansion 3 : when Helen invites E.Gadd, she asks him a lot of questions,and some of then are about his assistant. " My, how brave of him to face such dangerous ghosts, how did the poor man survive ?" "Why, I shouldn't probably talk too much about this, but I trust you to not gossip. You see, my dear boy Luigi has quite the surprising talent ..."

(Suggestive content + spoilers for Luigi's Mansin 3 under the read more, you have been warned)

Helen's plan to capture Luigi totally involved to seduce him and lure him away from his family, but our boy's too oblivious for that and fell asleep right after getting to his room. Helen, after waiting for an hour and realizing her sultry pose and hints didn't work, decided to fall back on a simple "grab the rest of the posse and hide"

LM3 starts like in the game with Luigi falling asleep and waking up to things going apeshit, with Helen ans King Boo showing up, and King Boo chasing after Luigi and cornering him at the end of the corridor. Luigi is terrified of course...but fear and arousal have always crossed wires in his brain. Especially with ghosts. Oh, they terrify him, and yet when King Boo presses down on him, he's also hard as a brick, awfully aroused...which KB notices in his aura (and then the tent in his overalls). And he can now attest that the rumours about Luigi's aura being very attractive are true.

KB is very, very amused and tests further this inclination, and smut ensues...and because he wants to make the chase last and to drive Luigi to his limits, afterwards, King Boo all but pushes Luigi down the laundry chute while challenging him to come and get his friends back, but only if each of the floor's main ghosts find Luigi to their liking. And of course he'll spread the word about that human with a kink for ghosts...

Instead of the wanted posters with money for reward, it's a pin up picture with a number to call.

Through the entire night, between floors, Luigi gets harassed here and there by various ghosts and Boos who want a taste of the delicious human, but King Boo also gave clear instructions so the Boss Ghosts get dibs on him.

Stewart, Chambrea and Kruller are pretty easy to satisfy : they're all overworked and stressed out by their jobs, and once Luigi shows up with his delicious, enticing aura, it doesn't take much to convince them to sit back and relax. A head/handjob (well, the equivalent for ghosts as they don't have the same anatomy as humans anymore) and some fondling and kisses, and they're spent and content.

Chef Soulfflé and Amadeus Wolfgeist are Luigi's first obstacles : they're both "artists" whose energy expresses through their art, and so it's less about physical sex : they find release in making their "victim" experiment actual Food/music porn. Luigi never thought he would be able to come just from a concert.

King MacFrights : Ooooh these dungeons and torture contraptions are going to come in handy. The joust still happens though, with the victor gaining the favours of the crowd...a very enthusiastic crowd...

Garden Suites : Like mentioned before, if Dr Potter doesn't get physical himself, his beloved plants, on the other hand...between the very long and grabby vines, sex pollen all over the place, and toothy carnivorous plants, Luigi spends a LOT of time on this floor.

T-Rex + Ug : Gooigi comes in VERY handy there, because Luigi would NOT have survived T Rex vore with his own body. Sharing his consciousness with a pile of good helps for very interesting sensations.

Morty is the sweetest of all ghosts, and gives Luigi a well earned reprieve by letting him rest for a while and pampering his new star the whole time.

He's the first ghost where Luigi is actually the one to make the first move sincerely. However, he also insists on filming everything (and not necessarily taking part himself), puts Luigi through different roles and scenarios...He keeps up the praise all the while, which is an enormous boost to Luigi's confidence (and he realises he has a praise kink).

Boiler room : let's say Clem ain't keeping these rubber duckies just for decoration. At least lying down on a giant rubber duckie floatie in a pool the whole time is kinda relaxing.

Serpci ; listen even in the canon of the game, I thought when I first saw her "what is it with ghost ladies making Luigi sneeze while making seductive poses ? Is this how you manifest your interest?"

Anyway look at her. She would demand worship and praise from Luigi (thankfully he picked up some tips from Morty) and gosh just look at her ❤️

Captain Fishook and Johnny Deepend: look, if you can't see the sex appeal in a hunk shark pirate on his ship and a buff life guard, I can't do anything for you. Luigi even gets to get drunk in the grotto lounge afterwards, turns out pirate ghosts know how to party

Triplets of the Twisted Suites : oh boy, this one is gonna be a wild ride. Three magician girls with a streak for mischief in a floor full of tricks and traps ? It's a miracle he makes it out alive.

Disco floor : Luigi canonically loves dancing, especially in the Luigi's Mansion games. He's killing it on the dance floor. Going clubbing has never been his style, but now he gets the full experience, including the grinding and groping.

Ironically Helen is the only ghost in the hotel who doesn't manage to get a go at Luigi: he passes out in the Master suite for a while (he needs to regain some energy before King Boo) and when she tries to stop him, he claims he played with her pussy and holds up Polterkitty. She's furious but she appreciates that he did look after her precious cat.

Now Luigi arrives to the top of the hotel, armed with all the knowledge he acquired through the night on ghost pleasure, still "smelling" like the most delicious thing to spectres, and facing a blue-balled King Boo who has been watching Luigi's progress the whole time.

Mario when Luigi frees him : "Oh Luigi, you look exhausted, these ghosts must have kept you up all night!"

Luigi : "haha...yeah you could say that."

Who will win ? YOU DECIDE !!

[chimchimmarie]

POV: That one time Jimin really wanted you to call him “Oppa”, too. (Part1)

Read Part2 here. 😊

Jimin is not a jealous boyfriend. He tells himself that. He could go on and shake off the harmless flirting from other guys, as long as it’s not initiated and reciprocated by you. It doesn’t irk him that much because you’re usually so oblivious of things like this.

However, when it comes to his band members it’s a completely different story. He knows you had a thing for Yoongi way before you and him got together. He knows Yoongi was your bias. But you swore it was all before you and Jimin ever met and started dating. You promised him this one night, when he sat you down to clear things up.

Of course it would be Jimin—Now that you are together-together, it all just makes sense that your boyfriend is your bias. Yoongi was it, before Jimin ever came to your life. But it’s different now.

Jimin believes you. He trusts you. You are in a committed relationship after all. And as you said to him that night and the other nights that followed, “Babe, there’s nothing-and absolutely nothing-that could take my eyes off of you.”

You loved Jimin and there’s no one and nothing that can change that. You’re absolutely head over heels for your sexy, cute, and lovely boyfriend.

Yoongi is like any other celebrity you really admire. After years of being acquainted with him through Jimin, you still see him as a celebrity for sure, one who you really look up to as a rapper and music producer. Only now it has been upgraded a little bit as Jimin’s friend and older brother. You respected Yoongi as with the rest of the members.

However, there are times when the fangirl in you would still be blown away with Yoongi’s eccentricity. But that’s just it. You don’t feel things for Yoongi the way you feel them for Jimin.

You respect Yoongi. You’re crazy in love with Jimin.

Yoongi being your bias has become an inside joke of the group and he was chill about it.

The boys would tease you sometimes. Jungkook even used to go as far as bring it up in the most awkward moments like that time you first met Bang PD in one of their intimate dinners. The teasing went on for a while but nothing really became of it.

Jimin, on the other hand, wasn’t initially so cool about it. He even sat you down one night to clear the air. That speaks volumes on how it used to bother him. But you understood where it was coming from. And so you reassured him that he only has your heart. And he soon became okay with it.

Jimin knows it sounds petty. It is petty. Don’t get him wrong, he’s aware that Yoongi being your bias shouldn’t really bother him and he knows it’s supposed to be the logical thing. But he’s just another doting boyfriend who wanted her girl to only look at him. He’s possessive of you like that. And sometimes his insecurities get the better of him. Especially when he knows that as perfect as you are in his eyes, you could have whoever it is that you’d want in your life. He still can’t believe that that person is him. You chose him. That As crazy as he is for you, you are crazy for him, too.

But during movie night with the guys the other day, you unknowingly made a mistake that got Jimin all riled up the entire night.

As everyone was getting comfortable in their chosen seats in the living room, you and Jimin settled for the couch. The other guys chose to camp up on the floor which Taehyung and Jungkook had filled with soft mats and huge pillows.

Jimin had plopped himself on the far end of the couch comfortably waiting for you to come and settle next to him.

Everybody seemed to be settled down except for Yoongi and Hobi.

Soon enough, Hobi called dibs on the other end of the sofa claiming its his favorite spot. So that leaves Yoongi to take the spot next to you.

Yoongi seemed reluctant at first, but as the movie was about to start, you called on him to take the seat. Albeit, too excitedly.

You: “Oppa! Come here and sit down!”(you pat the space next to you) “the movie’s about to start!”

You didn’t notice Jimin scowl as he scrunched his nose to the tone of your voice. You seemed too excited for his liking.

When Yoongi finally took the seat, you faced him and handed him the bowl of popcorn that Jimin prepared for the both of you and certainly not for Yoongi.

You: “Oppa, want some popcorn? Let’s share! I hope you like creamy parmesan.”

Yoongi only smiled with a muted “Thanks.”

You made sure Yoongi was comfortable and with just enough popcorn for the rest of the movie.

Jimin couldn’t stop himself from rolling his eyes and doing that tongue thing when something starts to get on his nerves.

The truth is, Jimin has always wanted you to call him “oppa”, too. But as you were the same age as him and Taehyung, born in the same year and actually just a month later than him, you saw no need for it. You found it awkward in a sense. You found it weird so you both dropped the matter and he didn’t press you on calling him oppa since then.

“Baby”, “babe”, or “jagi” were enough. And according to you, “Seokjin, Yoongi, Hobi and Joonie are my only real oppas, here. Sorry babe.” 😅

However that didn’t really change the fact that he still wanted you to call him “oppa”.

Jimin couldn’t concentrate on the movie. He was busy thinking of a way to “mark his territory”.

He’d take your hand in his lap and pepper it with kisses. He’d snake an arm around your waist and smell your hair. He’d pull you closer into his chest and kiss your temple. He’d grab the popcorn from Yoongi and pop one on your mouth. He’d put a hand on your thigh with a gentle squeeze.

You’d give him a smile every now and then, But you seem to not really get the hint that he wants you to do all these things to him, too! He’s growing more and more frustrated by the minute.

You, on the other hand, were so engrossed with the movie because you were really looking forward to watch it and partly because you had to occasionally argue with Jungkook about his commentary.

You were oblivious of the big ball of a sulky boyfriend you had brewing next to you.

Jimin spent the entire night sulking in silence. But still had his arm protectively spread around you, as if to put a wall between you and your “oppa”. 😒

Once you got home, you asked him what’s up with his now apparent lack of interest as you went off with how the movie was so good and how Jungkook was so annoyingly misinformed with all his commentary.

You: “hey babe, what’s wrong? You’re being silent. Is everthing okay?”

Jimin: “it’s nothing.”

You: “Baby.. you know you can talk to me.“

Jimin: “I said, it’s nothing.”

You: “Babe.. come on.. What’s the matter? Did i do something wrong?”

Jimin: “I said drop it y/n!! I’m not in the mood for this right now!”

(Your eyes go wide as his loud voice startles you. He never yells at you.)

You: “What is up with you?? i didn’t even do anything and you’re yelling at me.. for what??”

Jimin: “oh i don’t know.. Why don’t you figure it out with your “oppa”, you want me to call him for you?!”

You: “What are you talking about?? Is this—is this about Yoongi? For chrissake Jimin, not this again!”

Jimin: (he scoffs) “of course, you just don’t care about what I feel sometimes, do you?”

But before you could press him for more, he walks out and slams the door to your shared bedroom.

You were fuming. And he was, too. You soon figure out what went wrong that night. You didn’t realize how it really must have hurt him.

If he felt neglected in anyway tonight, it wasn’t what you intended. Making him feel hurt like this is the last thing you would ever want. The guilt is slowly creeping up on you.

You love him. But you also see nothing wrong with you being friendly with Yoongi. Bias or not he’s still Jimin’s friend—his brother.

Jimin is being difficult. But you still wanted to comfort him knowing you caused this. But instead of crawling in bed to cuddle him, you decided against it and just let things cool down. You went on and did your night routine. But by the time you get to bed, Jimin already had his back turned away from you.

Maybe tomorrow it will all be better.

Except it wasnt.

The next day Jimin went on to give you the cold shoulder.

Read Part2 here! 😊

Check out more in my masterlist!

[messinwitheddie]

Dib "Pretty sure that's everything you brought with you from Cali and whatever you wrote while you lived with us. Dad has literally never touched any of our bedrooms since we moved out. It's kind of sweet, but also kind of creepy."

Squee "I can't believe he didn't throw all of my old journals out. I thought about throwing them out a thousand times."

Reg "Glad you didn't now, hu?"

Squee "Sort of. I'm not sure how useful any of this will be to Dipper, but-"

Dib "I think he just wants a second opinion-- like a beta reader. He over thinks everything every step of the way."

Squee "So you recommend ME to help ghost write the fourth journal?"

Dib "It's the perfect side project for you, trust me."

Squee "Yeah, maybe. It's a lot of pressure."

Dib "Only if you psych yourself out over it. Just enjoy the experience. You owe it to yourself."

Squee "I haven't dedicated any significant time or energy into writing since high school. Back then, it was just an escape from school bullies and home bully. Mostly fanfiction and campy short horror stories."

Dib "Which were amazing, I read them. So, keep writing. Don't let the sucky people that got in your way over a decade ago stop you from doing something awesome you want to do now. I was bullied for my interests and look at me, still chasing the paranormal... when free time permits me."

Reg "You were bullied in school too?"

Dib "Yeah, big time."

Reg "By WHO?"

Dib "Pretty much everyone; other kids, teachers, your grandad on occasion, your aunt Gaz-"

Reg "Really?"

Squee "She can bully with the best of them if you push her buttons right."

Reg "Wow."

Dib "Some kids were bigger jerks than others, but I never really found a group of kids I connected with until I met the Pines twins. I rarely left my room without hearing the words "big head" directed towards me."

Reg "But you're big and strong and super science smart. Who would ever screw with you?"

Dib "I was scrawny and awkward right up until my sophomore year of high school. Being... neurodivergent didn't help my case."

Reg "That's not a reason to make fun of someone."

Squee "You're not a bully, that's why you subscribe to that logic. My suggestion, make online friends. That's the beauty of the internet."

Reg "I know technically I have friends, it's just... Is bullying something everyone goes through?"

Squee "I didn't used to think so, but the older I get and the more people I interact with, I realized the answer is yes. Bullying is a learned behavior reinforced by past bullying. Most of the time, if someone is abusing the people around them, in some way, they're being abused themselves. You can't stop bullies from roaming this earth. You can just choose not to be one."

Reg "Is that why dad's a bully now? Because he was bullied when he was a kid?"

Dib "Wait wait wait-- You think I'm a bully? Seriously?"

Reg "You have... bully-like tendencies."

Dib "NO I DON'T. "

Reg "You bully Zim."

Dib "ZIM is an imperialist megalomaniac butt weevil from space! I don't BULLY Zim, I retaliate."

Squee "You bully the interns at the lab."

Dib "Because they're idiots who can't follow directions! Being assertive and expecting my coworkers to focus and not blow anything up doesn't make me a bully."

Reg "You harass your fellow swollen eyeballs."

Dib "Don't even-- I've had to defend my theories and research from oblivious trolls and amateurs trying to pick apart my work every step of the way! Todd, man, tell the boy I'm not a bully."

Squee "You have bully-like tendencies."

Dib "..."

Squee/ Reg "..."

Dib "Okay... nice to know what my big brother and my only son really think of me."

Reg "Dad-"

Dib "No, I get it. It's cool."

Squee "Come on, man-"

*series of high pitched, static and beeping*

Dib "Holy shit, my ghost boxes are going off like crazy. At least the spirits in this house think I'm bearable to be around."

Squee " Wait, Dib, that's probably just Nny-- he'll figure it out."

Reg -sad groan-

Squee "I can't win."

[For context, because my aus are all over the place.

Dib had bought a historically haunted house upstate on an impulse with the intention of ghost hunting with Reg, father and son. However, Reg has decided to go live with his mother on the Von Verminstrasser cryptid nature reservation, virtually crushing Dib's dream.

He rents the house out to the recently married, Squee and Pepito.

Sketched these out on break and lunch throughout last week. Decided to clean them up a little earlier today.]

[refried-ghost]

"Why would she ask that?" He hadn't intended to voice the thought. Had realized he did until-

"Ask what?" The computer probed frustration pouring from it's voice. Zim shouldn't have opened his mouth. But the irken was oblivious to the mechanical arms obvious struggle to remove GIR from his wires.

"Nothing. No one asked anything."

A deep sigh came from the machine. He flinched as an arm snaked quickly towards him. He wasn't expecting the gentle pat it gave his forehead. Well as gentle a head pat a cold mechanical arm could give.

"You never just rest."

Zim looked towards the ceiling confused at the shift in attitude.

"There's no reason to. An idle irken is a worthless irken. Rest is earned. And unnecessary."

"You contradicted yourself. And I disagree on all accounts. Rest is amazing. It used to be one of my favorite things. You should give it a try."

A pillow was dropped on top of him earning a surprised yelp. Once he's regained his bearings a blanket had already been wrapped around him.

"Computer!" The arms readjusted the pillow and toppled him over onto it mid shout. He pouted into the fabric, before the fight drained out of him.

"Just try to stop thinking. Let yourself sleep."

He couldn't though. The first not the second. He thought about the Red and Purple and how he always fucked everything up. His mistakes repeated over and over in his mind. And he thought about Gaz and their dinners and the stupid human boy who actually respected him. Saw him as the threat her tried to be. Not the failure he really was.

The question hurt. It hurt so much. He wanted to say yes. But if he did what would that mean about him mission. About all the effort he'd put into win them back.

Some part of knew it was fake from the beginning. Something thought up on the spot to get rid of him. A mercy of not putting their real feelings into words. Purple had already. He'd made himself clear and that was before what happened to Spork. Red though. He felt guilty. He used Zim. Feigning ignorance the one time Zim willingly took the blame. The one time it wasn't actually his fault.

But a large part of was desperate to fix things. Partly believing his mission genuine. Partly believing it a purposeful opportunity. A final chance from the one who didn't hate him. Who still wanted to be friends. From the irken he looked up to, but was too much of a coward to face the possibility of a life without his best friend.

Red valued Purple more then he did Zim. Despite what he'd done to him. Zim had fleeting thoughts of confronting him. Or about telling Purple what really happened. But Zim chose this path. Sure he hadn't realized where it lead at the time. But he still chose it. And he knew that would only make things worse.

"Are we friends?" The question echoed threw his head. No. Not anymore. Not with Red and Purple at least.

He choked out a sob curling in on the pillow.

But they weren't the ones who asked.

No. That was the Gazling. The human he could tolerate. The one he made dinner with in the absence of her father. Dib would show up screaming out why Zim was in his house. It either end in a fight or Gaz making him back off. He'd try to reason with her. She'd get him to run off. On the rare occasion he'd settle down enough to eat with them.

Those days between the boys' squabbling Zim would catch the girl smile slightly as they all sat at the table and ate. For reason it would remind him of Purple. Before everything. After the taller finally warmed up to him.

He wanted to be friends. But he didn't know if he could.

"Good night, sweet dreams," the Computer whispered as he finally cried himself to sleep.

[homocidal-invader]

GretchenxDib, TorquexDib, ZimxZita, ZimxKeef

lol we got all the humans in here

Gretchen x Dib

I tried to use the shipping chart but it didn't work nothing on it fit lol. SO I'VE REPLACED THE SHIPPING CHART WITH THIS ONE

and by canon I do mean one sided. I think it's a hilarious background thing. Someone likes Dib. It's so funny. I would definitely like to see more jokes with it.

However, despite that I don't ship it seriously. I think Dib isn't straight and is also Very oblivious so if they ever started talking he'd just talk about his alien stuff all day not listening to her at all and never find out she has a crush on him, and eventually she gets tired or moves away lol

Also here's a ZaDr video that has Gretchen in it

Torque x Dib

I can definitely understand the appeal of the buff big guy x skinny nerd boy, and I definitely remember the scenes where Dib ranted to him pretty funny. That part in dark harvest is iconic.

I don't really see it working out seriously but I do feel like when people write "jealous Zim" fics he's definitely not a bad candidate XD

Zim x Zita

I like Zita as like the character that voices the crowds thoughts, who is the first to tell Dib he's crazy, that sort of thing.

Her relationship with Zim seems quite limited. She thinks he's definitely a weird kid, but not an alien. I think it'd be interesting to see someone try to make something out of it but currently I don't see it

Zim x Keef

old chart returns.

Look, I like Keef. Don't get me wrong. But I like... canon Keef.

I enjoy Keef the way he was MEANT to be enjoyed lol. I am elitist about Keef. People can make whatever AUs they want of course but Keef is just canonically

Keef to me is the funny kid. He is a bit overexcited and is funny to make jokes with. He's not a serious character and by making him a serious character that is Capable of Being A Love Interest u basically make him not Keef anymore

keef is. like. Actively unattractive to me. Like ok age him up to an adult but he's like,,, keef? keef. keef. I like him I think we should throw him off of roofs more.

[j-a-nuary]

CARRIER

Re-introductions

<< first | < backward | masterlist | forward >

Stray Kids Urban fantasy AU (feat. Ateez from time to time) | A “carrier service” exists, seemingly only to get people (usually women) home safe after the trains stop running.

Heavy on bad boys with hearts of… some kind of shiny metal, probably.

Warnings: Affectionate use of the word whore, drinking, flirting, the concept of "dibs" being applied to a person (y'know, with free will?)

=====

"You're a real piece of shit Han Jisung," Tempawan clapped a hand on the back of her newly rediscovered friend.

"Shim Tempawan," Jisung turned, quickly wrapping his arms around her in a tight hug, "you absolute whore."

He was pretending to be surprised, and doing a damn good job of it. He had, of course, smelled her as soon as she entered the bar. Ripe mangosteen and something like liquor. A smell he hadn't recognized two days ago, but now was bewildered that he had ever forgotten.

"Do you ever wonder what people must think of us?" She asked him as he rocked back and forth, his hug dragging her along for the ride.

"Never," he finally stopped and turned, leaving one arm around her shoulders, "let me introduce you to my friends."

Tempawan hadn't noticed the few men standing with Jisung.

"This is Kim Hongjoong…"

A man with his hair tied back nodded, polite but seemingly uninterested in making friends.

"He, uh, owns a couple businesses around here. Song Mingi…"

Six feet if he was an inch, a slightly deeper nod, and a friendly smile.

"... works for him, but don't hold that against him. Park Seonghwa…"

A calculating head tilt, a sweep of the eyes. No nod.

"Is a lawyer? I believe…"

Seonghwa simply nodded.

"Oh perfect!" Jisung lit up a little bit as a surprisingly familiar head of golden curls approached. "This i-"

"Boots?!" Tempawan couldn't hold back from interrupting.

Felix stopped suddenly, nearly toppling the couple of glasses on the tray he held.

"Boots?" Hongjoong was suddenly very interested in the conversation. A grin split his face as he swept his eyes over Felix. For what must have been the first time, he noticed the heel on his shoes.

"You motherfucker! Call me short one more time you fucking liar!"

An interesting combination of concern and amusement spread across Seonghwa's features. He knew that Hongjoong was, mostly, joking around. Still, he could get a little sensitive at times; about the strangest things too.

For his part, Felix looked panicked. He shot Tempawan a harried kind of smile, then tugged at Jisung’s jacket.

"Hey, Sung, a word?"

Jisung, seemingly oblivious to his friend's distress, just tilted his head.

"Sure, what's up?"

"I mean, uh, could we maybe…"

Tempawan took action to disperse as much tension as she could.

"Hey, I'm going to grab a drink. Don't wait up for me," she teased Jisung. Offering the others a quick nod, she headed for the bar.

=====

Felix immediately tugged Jisung aside. Jisung tried, and failed, to grab one of the glasses from the tray that Felix had finally set down on the table.

"What the fuck is she doing here?"

"I don't know," Jisung shrugged, lifting the glass to his lips.

"You didn't invite her?" Felix pressed.

"Fuck no," Jisung huffed, "why would I invite her when I know that Chan and Changbiiaaaah fuck…"

Felix felt no little satisfaction at the way Jisung’s face went pale.

Jisung wasn't stupid. He was even brilliant when he actually put the work in. He just had a tendency towards forgetfulness and getting distracted.

"Exactly. You've got to find a way to get her out of here," Felix explained, "now."

"Alright, alright," Jisung waved his hand dismissively, "just let me think for a second, fuck."

"I don't mean to interrupt," Seonghwa interrupted, "but your friend there - is she single?"

Jisung blinked, trying to process the new information being insinuated.

"What? Yeah, I think so," he shook his head before fixing Seonghwa with a piercing look, "why?"

Seonghwa nodded towards the bar.

As one, Felix and Jisung turned.

Tempawan was laughing, leaning forward, playing with the straw in her drink. All fine and normal things to do while flirting at a bar. No problems there.

However, she was laughing with, leaning towards, and now reaching up to fix the collar of none other than one Jeong Yunho.

=====

Glad to be clear of the oddity of running into a carrier in the wild, Tempawan hopped up onto a seat by the corner of the bar. She figured she'd be out of the way enough to not interfere with the bartender's business.

"What can I get you, my friend?"

She smiled at the bartender, briefly looking over the taps on display.

"The sour please."

"And did you want to start a tab?"

"Sure," she pulled her bag forward, setting it on the bar, "just le-"

"You can put it on mine," a voice said somewhere to the right of, and slightly above her.

She looked up, seeing a kind enough looking man nodding his assurance to the bartender.

“You don’t have to-”

He raised a hand, waving her words aside. Turning to give her a somewhat childish smile, Yunho couldn’t help but wonder why he was being so forward. It wasn’t really his style. But for whatever reason, he had decided to go for it.

“No pressure,” he assured her, “you can walk away right now if you like.”

The seeping chill, and rising heat, had become something like background noise to Tempawan over the last few days. Relying once again on that highly contextual anecdotal evidence, she knew that there was really only one thing that would make it go away.

Besides, this guy wasn’t half bad looking.

“I think I’ll give you a chance to persuade me to stay.”

=====

"He's going to get murdered," Felix muttered under his breath.

"Who's getting murdered?" Hongjoong had now joined the three of them. He followed their gaze towards the bar, and cocked his head slightly.

"She seems into it. Besides," Hongjoong shrugged, "you all know he's a nice enough guy."

"No," Jisung barely breathed the word, "you don't get it."

"What's to get?" Seonghwa asked.

"They might not be dating," Jisung started.

"But that's Changbin’s girl," Felix finished.

The group of them silently watched the two chat. Jisung hated hearing her be described as Changbin’s girl. He hated it more than watching the way Yunho pretended that making way for another patron was the reason he had to move closer to her. He hated it more than the way she smiled and seemed to blush at the new closeness.

He actually hated it less than watching Yunho bend down and speak more directly into her ear.

Jisung took a step forward, but Felix grabbed his wrist.

"We have to come up with a way to make Changbin late," Felix suggested. "Tell him to pick something up at the store or something."

"Like what?" Jisung asked. He kept his eyes on Tempawan, an entire orchard of mangosteen trees seeming to have suddenly ripened in Jisung’s nostrils as Tempawan’s tongue peeked out to wet her lips. As if that weren't bad enough, he felt himself start to shake slightly when Yunho put a hand on her arm.

Felix felt it too.

"Focus."

"Why is it a big deal?" Hongjoong asked, "You said they aren't dating, right? Changbin’s not a totally unreasonable guy."

"No offense, Joong," Felix tried his best to sound both appeasing and assured, "but he's changed since he stopped working for you."

"Changed is…" Jisung sighed, finally tearing his eyes off of Tempawan, "putting it lightly."

"I didn't know him before," Seonghwa added, "but he definitely doesn't scream stability to me."

Mingi, who up until now had been content to watch and listen, pushed his way past the other four men.

=====

Yunho spotted his friend approaching, and tried to give him a subtle head shake. He didn’t know if Mingi hadn’t noticed it or was just ignoring it, but he did not halt his steps.

Mingi had noticed the gesture, but based on what he had heard from Felix and Jisung, he figured that he was doing Yunho a favor by interrupting.

“I think I’m about to be pulled away,” Yunho said.

Resting her chin on her palm, Tempawan pursed her lips, affecting a pseudo-pout to match the flirtation in her voice as she spoke.

“If you don’t want to talk to me anymore, you don’t need to make an excuse,” she made a conscious effort to run a thumb over her bottom lip in a way that might seem subconscious as she glanced at Yunho’s lips.

“No pressure,” she added.

Yunho was in. He knew he was in. The fact that he knew he was in was evidence of just how in he was. Yunho knew he was typically oblivious to advances from women. Or men. His friends constantly made fun of him for missing out because he just thought everyone was being nice.

“It’s not an excuse,” his eyes were glued to Tempawan’s now slightly smeared lipstick, “are you going to be here a while?”

“Depends,” she had now clocked Mingi’s approach, working out that he was probably who Yunho was talking about, “one of my friends is here so I might stick around.”

“Yu-”

“Mingi, right?” Tempawan cut him off, flashing him the wide eyed smile that she had learned was one of her better weapons for disarming men.

“Yes,” Mingi nodded once before turning his attention to Yunho, “they’re going to be here soon.”

Yunho groaned, letting his head fall forward for a second before straightening up.

“Fine,” he gave Tempawan a soft smile, “we’re kind of having a business thing. I’d like to talk more afterwards. No pressure.”

Barely twenty minutes, and they already had an inside joke. Tempawan was actually impressed.

“I’ll be around,” she nodded.

“Actually,” Felix cut in, a tense smile plastered across his face, “you won’t. We need to talk.”

Tempawan practically jumped, having had zero awareness of Boots’ approach. She pressed a hand against her chest, trying to settle her heart rate.

“Why?”

Felix glanced between Little Turtle and the two men. Mingi, having been present for the discussion about Changbin, seemed to be accepting what was happening. Yunho looked, for lack of a better word, curious.

Felix shot them an ingratiating smile before trying to impress upon Little Turtle the severity of the situation.

“Remember the conversation we had? About names?”

Mingi, having mastered the art of reading the room, started directing Yunho back towards their table.

Tempawan could see Boots visibly relax as they got further away.

“Yeah,” she shot a playful pout over his shoulder at Yunho when he glanced back. Turning her attention back to Boots, she tilted her head, “it’s dangerous or whatever.”

=====

“What did I miss out on?” Yunho asked Mingi as he was ushered away.

“Long story short…” Mingi sighed, “Changbin apparently has dibs.”

Yunho looked back, heart skipping a beat when he saw the look she gave him.

“Does she know that?”

“No idea.”

=====

“Right,” his voice was sharp, pressing into Tempawan’s ear like thorns, “so when I say that you should leave…”

He left the rest unsaid, offering her the opportunity to come to the natural conclusion.

She licked her lips, thinking over everything she knew about the carriers, Boots, and the new people she had been introduced to.

“Does Jisung work with you?”

He closed his eyes in frustration, then cleared his throat.

“I literally can not have that conversation with you.”

“So he does,” she nodded slowly. From everything she remembered about Jisung, he wasn’t the type to get involved in anything dangerous. Not on purpose anyway. But a lot could happen in a few years.

Her eyes scanned the group, finding Jisung’s familiar form easily enough.

Something occurred to her then, and she met his eyes again.

“So you both work with Bin.”

Felix could feel the situation unraveling much faster than he would have liked. He sighed, rubbing a hand over his chin.

“Okay,” he huffed, “listen: if you leave right now, I swear that I will find a way to get you some answers. But you absolutely can not be here when the others arrive.”

“How come you’re telling me all of this instead of Jisung?”

Felix took a deep breath, trying to control his patience.

“Again,” he smiled a smile of flower fields under bright sunshine, “answers later. Leaving now.”

Tempawan blinked, temporarily disarmed by the delightfully pastoral man in front of her.

“Fine,” she sighed, “you know the club Sonar?”

Felix nodded.

“Somebody from here better show up there once you’re done here.”

“Fine,” Felix agreed easily enough, “great even. Now you need to go.”

Tempawan threw back the remaining sour in her glass and nodded.

“Oh, uh, Boots,” she smiled at him, “if you and Jisung are busy, you could always send Yunho.”

“Absolutely not,” he smiled at her, “we don’t need any murders tonight. Exit is that way,” he pointed towards a side door.

“Fine,” she rolled her eyes and headed out.

=====

“I’m sure your…” Chan paused, for the slightest of seconds, flashing a look in Seonghwa’s direction, “lawyer has some questions.”

They had been dancing around each other for the duration of the meeting. Quick glances, barely resisted narrowing of eyes, and excessive care when choosing words had quickly become the standard for the, admittedly minimal, conversation between the two.

"Actually," Seonghwa shrugged, swirling the remaining dregs of his vieux carré, "the less I know, the better." He lifted the glass, staring Chan down as he emptied it between his lips.

Felix and Jisung exchanged a look. There was no doubt that they'd be sharing theories about the tension between the two men later on. Most likely in the group chat that conveniently excluded both their boss and their doctor.

Hongjoong, either ignorant to or disregarding the atmosphere, laughed off Seonghwa's comment. He slapped a hand against the tense man's shoulder as he spoke.

"You're so dramatic, Hwa."

Turning his attention back towards the man he had just entered into a gentleman's agreement with, he affected a stage whisper.

"He's not my lawyer if I'm not paying him, right?"

[beneaththetangles]

First Impression: Tomo-chan is a Girl!

Tomo-chan is a girl who wastes no time. It’s her first year of high school and the cherry trees are still in full bloom when she confesses her love to Jun! Only, as it turns out, Tomo-chan has done nothing but waste time, as she’s been in love with her best friend for time immemorial. For his part, he still doesn’t see her as a girl. Just how much he doesn’t see her as a girl is up for debate during the first half of the episode, as the two’s comedic dialogue and slapstick interactions fail to clarify whether or not he realizes that she is, biologically speaking, female. It takes a hostile intervention from a third party, childhood friend Misuzu (who gives off strong evil genius vibes), to get Jun to acknowledge that he knows Tomo is a girl, but he remains committed to treating her like one of the guys, even if it does get him punched in the head every time he touches her in a “sports bros” kind of way. Meanwhile, there are a few other guys on the scene who are very aware of Tomo’s gender (she has a good, ahem, build), like the excitable Tanabe and cool pretty boy senpai Misaki, captain of the boys’ karate club to which Tomo belongs at school (she was too powerful for the girls’ club; they are now petrified of her). But Tomo has eyes only for Jun. How can she make him see her as potential girlfriend material, without compromising who she is? Let the hilarious antics and comedy of errors ensue!

That love confession did not go according to plan…

I expected this to be a hoot and boy, does it ever deliver! While the humor does rely a fair amount on gender stereotypes, it manages to do so in an affirming way, steering clear of sexist territory and crudity. Even the most uncensored character, Tanabe, is neither pervy nor disrespectful in his curiosity about Tomo and Jun’s relationship, which is a welcome change from a great deal of anime. Tomo is genuinely charming with her paradoxical self-confidence in who she is, and bashfulness around matters of the heart. A wholesome character arc in the making! Meanwhile, Jun’s apparent obliviousness to Tomo’s romantic potential (and intent) is more nuanced than first it seems, as his pally words and manner belie a hint of insecurity about losing his best friend. Here is promise of yet another rich character arc! And saving the best for last, there’s also Misuzu, the long-suffering friend of the pair, who at some point transmogrified into the mortal enemy of Jun, and has called dibs on being the only person with the right to mess with the two. And mess with them she does, to hilarious effect! She seems to be the most self-aware of the trio, and is certainly the most mysterious. The character designs are strong and the animation, appropriately full of energy. The voice acting is superlative, with special mention going to Rie Takahashi as Tomo (hard to believe she also voices Emilia in Re:Zero!) and the two gyarus who try to intimidate Tomo and learn pretty quickly to think better of it. All in all, this promises to be a delightfully entertaining series, with the potential for a lot of heart too. Sign me up!

Sage advice from Misuzu.

=====

Tomo-chan is a Girl! is streaming on Crunchyroll.