#disclaimer: i do not drive

[killjoy-prince]

Project Diva X's way of getting outfits via rhythm game gacha makes me wanna run it over with a truck

[titanofthedepths]

Yes you’re not fatphobic but are you capable of talking about fat people in a positive manner without saying somft/round/rotund/squishy/tumby/chumby/any other variation of the sort. Are you capable of talking about us in a positive manner without it being about beauty or attractiveness. Are you able to talk about fat people in general without being dehumanizing or infantilizing. Can you treat fat people with respect.

[brooks-heart-sunglasses]

Does this count as a mondo birthday post

(asexual flag version under the cut)

[corvidares]

okay, so i just finished re-reading Any Way the Wind Blows and this feels so blatant as to be smacking me in the face: simon is disabled.

now, the reason why that makes itself even clearer in this book than in wayward son (where he, of course, also has the wings + tail) is because simon is once again in the world of mages - despite doing his best to leave it behind. compared to wayward son, where hes basically and literally in the wild west. where theres magical beings everywhere, where simon practically fits in because he is one.

but ill get back to that.

ive seen a lot of really interesting points about what simon's wings represent and mean, and i'm not disagreeing with those. but in a very literal sense, they are a disability.

think about it like this: the world of mages (and Normals) is not built for humanoids who have giant webbed wings and a tail. simon constantly struggles with controlling these limbs, and their size makes it ten times harder. spaces are too small, furniture and objects are broken when he spreads them, and many a shirt or jacket are ruined.

he struggles to find a good way to deal with this - spell them away? wear them out by cutting holes in things? fold them extremely painfully into his shirt? even though this last one is treated like a solution for a little while, its far from ideal. who is simon doing this for? himself, or everyone around him? yes, of course Normals cant see them. and yeah, hes expressed discomfort about baz and penny spelling them hidden. but thats not the point. even with this botch job of a way to "wear" his wings, which succeeds at hiding them from Normals, simon still states a couple times that he knows people stare at him and his seeming hunchback. i mean, thats blatant.

(he eventually, with shepard's help, realizes a good way to work around this - zippers or buckles on shirtbacks - which very much feels like an aha! disability aid moment)

im not saying disability is based in how people look at you, or it only being a societal thing. (as in, when he wasnt in the world of mages, he wasnt suddenly 'not disabled at all') disability is a huge spectrum. but those things absolutely can be a part of the disabled experience.

but all of that doesnt even get to my main point: simon has no magic anymore. and in the world of mages, thats a huge deal. magic is like living and breathing, especially for baz and penny. its not something they question or have to worry about not being able to call upon. hell, even before simon lost his magic he was disabled, just to a different extent.

before awtwb, we dont hear much about mages whose magic is weak. but they come to the forefront now - which just solidifies that solid magical ability = able bodiedness.

smith is promising a miracle cure. a cure. think of it like bullshit orgs such as aut!sm spe@ks, wanting to "cure" autism - he wants to cure people. (and hes just as full of shit) why? because weak magic is seen as a disease, a problem, even subhuman.

take daphne, baz's stepmom. her quality of life is fine, great. her weaker magic doesnt seem to put her at a disadvantage. she manages her disability well. but in comparison to the norm, to what is expected of the average mage, shes got nothing. less than nothing. she feels shame over what she cant do.

smith's case becomes even more blatant when we see, at the end of awtwb, that he wants to essentially cull weak magicians. that they're holding back society. that theyre better off as powerless as Normals - who are blatantly seen as subhuman - than as weak mages. much like how ableist rhetoric puts forward that disability is a fate worse than death.

which brings us back to simon. he insists hes a Normal, now or always has been. baz insists hes the most powerful magician to exist. both of them are wrong.

and right. and right and wrong.

simon is some third thing - not a mage, not a Normal. akin to how disability is its own minority aside from race or ethnicity he has a foot in each world, and he always has. but now he cant achieve blending into either.

this is why the increasing presence and humanization of other magical beings beside mages is so important (thank you shephard!) how mages tend to seem magical beings is very ableist. theyre subhuman, theyre not to be trusted, theyre freaks, theyre dirty, etc. except oops, how can you keep thinking that penny, when this very nice one works at a cafe and helped you translate shephard's engagement terms?

even baz and the events of wayward son play into this - yeah, some vampires are horrible people. but plenty, like baz, are just people. with a range of experiences and morals and ways of living life. (take nicodemus) (i could make a point about how simon's stalwart acceptance of baz's vampirism helps baz comes to terms with it and how this is also super disability coded, but thats another essay)

in the beginning of awtwb, he decides to go to the extreme opposite of his chosen one powered life - to live as a Normal, and the second step (after cutting himself off from baz and penny) is getting his wings removed.

except he cant do it. and even having his wings touched is horribly uncomfortable. now, this partly has to do with how much theyre sensual parts of his body - same as his tail. but its also, separately, very intimate. theyre treated very clinically, like a fascinating specimen to pore over. im not trying to give niamh shit here, just saying what i saw.

but theyre part of him. people with disabilities often deal with being stared at and poked and prodded by the medical field (if theyre not ignored or waved off. maybe both.). even every day folks feel the right to touch disabled folks, or their mobility aids.

for a lot of people, mobility aids are a part of them - its like a stranger touching your face and thinking theyre doing you a favor. when instead theyre being weird as fuck.

simon's status as previous chosen one even plays into this sort of thing - people see him more as a figurehead, for what he can and cant do (including his wings!) than a person. hes a tragedy, hes a hero. hes inspirational, hes to be pitied. sound familiar?

the end of awtwb doesnt spell out whether simon ends up deciding to keep his wings (frustratingly). but they spell out that he would absolutely would, in my opinion.

simon increasingly treats them as a natural extension of his body. think of the scene where he flies about the watford goats. how he expresses his feelings with his wings and tail. and of course, how he learns to let baz loves each and every part of him: including his dragon limbs.

baz loves him, and loves them, not in a fetishistic way, but because its simon, and he loves everything simon is. not just what he represents or can or cant do.

[trainingdummyrabbit]

"not to ocpost-" please oc post (as long as you're ok with it) i would love to learn more about holly and chun-run!! (as long as you're ok with it!!)

! oh its absolutely ok, i love being enabled ^w^ kjfngdkjf um um. this is another Entire Thing(tm) that requires Exposition(tm) so um hope youre ready to read More Paragraphs !

the short answer is

the long answer is: i went 'hey i have two* ruina-era ocs, what if i put them next to each other for fun? haha they'd hate each other ^w^' ... 'Oh God They'd HATE Each Other.' so uh, the exposition.

Holly! You've Never Met Her Before. certainly not. ttttechnically. out of narrative, Holly was originally a branch of what Cocoa's character would have been when I was first developing her. in narrative, Holly is what would have happened if they'd never been picked up by LCorp. she's... an entirely different person, basically.

in essence, if you thought the other one was unstable, Oh Boy(tm). Holly is what happens when the city Actually gets the chance to sink its claws in. it's just this time, she was far, Far less quiet about it. girlies who completely fucking failed their stat check Again. there's only so much 'keep your head down and take it' you can really handle before you're just about ready to tear a bitch apart, and well. Well! anyway.

Holly is another angle of the Human/Monster/Object tangle, in where Cocoa's development hinges on the equivalent of trying to balance several spinning plates and Fucking Up Miserably, Holly has started hurling plates directly into the audience with intent. if you will.

humans are always talking some hot shit about how high and mighty they are, the "value" that comes with just being Human, and yet their entire lives are a horrible, animalistic dance of clawing each other to shreds while hiding behind ideas and roles they themselves put into play, like it's some stupid game. that harm is just an intrinsic part of the human nature. she can't fucking stand it.

essentially, she's an odd argument between the Human and Monster corners of the tangle. not only hates the binds that the city places on them of obligation, but also the ties of human emotion-- namely guilt and connection. that endless dance. she wants nothing more than to shed these ideals completely-- unfortunately, she still intrinsically and unconsciously clings onto them, afraid to let go. a human trying to claw its way out of humanity. it doesn't matter what it takes-- she's not letting this city take her first.

...and then there's Chun-Run.

we just don't know where chun-run came from. but she sure Is, and she's Immediately going to make it a Huge Fucking Problem. being aligned with the musicians of bremen, she has.. very normal views about art, and what it means to be Alive. she's the closest thing to a human time bomb i can think of, probably.

she doesn't have much of a character... honestly kind of intentionally? her entire being is solely rooted in the present, the What Is and the What Will Be. she strives to feel what the pianist's performance invoked that day-- through any means necessary. whatever happens to Her, to anything around her-- none of it matters. first and foremost, she is a conduit. it's all secondary to that singular experience.

horrifying. painful, disgusting. striking, poignant, pungent. it makes her sick to think about, but some part of her wishes she was closer to truly Feel it. its repulsive– but she Needs to hear it again. to witness, to experience. what is it– what was it? to grasp onto an ephemeral feeling she physically cannot understand– frustrating, frustrating. but she Needs to. to make the soul sing, cry out in reverence... to call it a Song is almost insulting.

so you have the worlds most unstable walking contradiction with absolutely no outlet and an unidentified fucking thing intent on wringing some undefineable meaning from the soul through physical violence.

so like, moth meet flame.

chun-run is pretty much Instantly infatuated with holly-- but for the Entire Wrong Reasons. it's pretty much "Yeah I Could Make Her Worse." all the way down, but expressed entirely through Murder. yknow, girl things. and holly, of course, fucking hates this are you for real right now??? shut the fuck up about reaching Art through Violence there is something WRONG WITH YOU. chun is entirely convinced that she's what will harmonize closest to that sound she's chasing-- that dissatisfaction, desire, rage... it's so painfully close. and yet she refuses to acknowledge that spark! refuses to engage entirely! is it not the nature of the soul to sing? so sing girl, sing.

girlies who are trying to claw their way back to stability and girlies who want nothing more than to burn to ashes in a beautiful blaze of Being. in conclusion:

[bandaidfingers]

🦇Preorders for Jonathan Harker’s Adventures in Castle Dracula are officially OPEN 🦇

Happy October everyone :D

Preorder’s will be open Oct 1- Oct 8 which should give me enough time to ship out before Halloween.

🦇$10—physical copy (with $4 US shipping—DM me if you need a non-US shipping rate calculated <3)

🦇FREE—pdf digital download

🦇$1 and for a buck I’ve decided to let you guys have access to a copy of one of the only five remaining original psd files from 2017, allowing you to remove our good friend Bram Stoker’s head and reveal Jonathan in all his silly cartoon glory lol.

Plus I scribbled out a bunch of these little bastards, so everyone who grabs a physical copy will get at least one, completely unique, little Count sticker stowing away in their package hehe >:^)c

I am susceptible to bribes for more stickers. I am susceptible to bribes for a specific sticker. I am susceptible to bribes for a different character as a sticker

Love and thanks to everyone who has enjoyed these little comics and encouraged me to have them reprinted 💕✌🏼

🦇Reblogs greatly appreciated🦇

[skunkes]

relearning to drive isnt so great, cheye finally driving seems about as likely as my plan b for transportation (waiting for the whole of the US to invest in good public transport)

[afterthefeast]

re lrb in any case to me astarion’s arc is less about regaining agency than becoming aware that he already has it and has to act like that. there's a distinction between agency as a material fact, ie having the ability in theory to make your own decisions and act on your desires, and the awareness of having that agency.

i'm no psychologist, but in my experience one of the most helpful steps in recovering from mental illness has been the awareness of my own agency ─ yes, sometimes I feel as though my life is completely run by my intrusive thoughts, but invariably getting out of that place has involved a recognition that ultimately, I am the one in control of my thoughts and I have the agency to work through them. that doesn't mean that it isn't hard, or time-consuming, and sometimes I don't succeed in the way I'd like, but nonetheless the ability to at least try is and always has been in my power.

in baldur's gate 3, your companions appear with varying degrees of agency (aside, obviously, from the tadpole they all share). they range from gale, whose current situation physically and magically restricts him but who at that moment in time doesn't have many other immediate restrictions on his day-to-day actions, to wyll, whose every move is watched by his abusive warlck patron.

nonetheless, your companions benefit from being shown that they not only could have agency at some point in the future, if they break their pact/shar's curse/free cazador/free orpheus/fix the infernal engine/get the crown of karsus, but they have agency now and must therefore use it responsibly. wyll is already to some degree aware of this, i think, even if it's only because he is so morally forthright ─ he's one of your companions who remains actively trapped by their abuser during the game, yet he refuses to kill karlach because he knows that would be wrong. even within his severely limited circumstances, he makes a choice, he demonstrates agency. in the shadowfell, shadowheart ─ a cult victim subjected to extreme psychological and religious abuse ─ has the choice whether or not to kill aylin, and can make it either way.

astarion, at the point at which you meet him, has just been given freedom for the first time in, essentially, his life. it's no surprise that he doesn't know what to do with thise newfound agency, and doesn't recognise it for what it is, given that he literally cannot remember ever having control over his own life. that's deeply tragic, but it doesn't erase the fact that he has control over the things he does during the game. those actions (for example, given i am still talking about that last rb, talking about the children he kidnapped and gave to cazador as though they were nothing), are things he has agency over and is responsible for. nonetheless, he acts as though he does not, lurching from one attempt to gain power to another (killing the druids to suggesting you use whatever's in moonrise to your advantage), because his own self-perception as someone completely powerless is so overwhelming. he must accrue power because that is the only way he can make sure he's safe and can never be hurt again. it's just that that self-perception is not completely accurate, he does have agency; if he makes choices that result in moral wrongs, those moral wrongs are his to bear.

i'm not getting at astarion here, I don't mean to imply that he's at fault for this attitude. it is, obviously, the natural response to 200 years of enslavement and abuse. kind of the whole point of the game, of all of your companions' quests, is that if people are hurt and abused often they will feel as though their only avenue towards power is to do the same to others. but being severely traumatised doesn't make his behaviour okay; he doesn't get a free pass to do whatever he wants because of cazador. you can like him, literally who am i to say otherwise (i like him too!), but don't just excuse everything he does or get rid of the most interesting parts of his character because you're unwilling to grapple with the fact that as it stands in the game, he's morally incredibly complex.

i think there's a tendency to assume that a character either must or must not have agency, and to present it as a binary, because for some reason it's used as a shorthand for moral culpability, when in reality the relationship between agency and culpability is significantly more complicated. i haven't really been getting into coerced choices here because that's a whole other kettle of fish (though i will give the necessary disclaimer that my stance on this is quite clearly influenced by the fact that deep down i'm a bit of a virtue ethicist). nonetheless, while this is my pop philosophy take and i'm not trying to impose this overall moral framework on people, i think it's pretty reasonable to say that lack of agency does not mean that what you did was not wrong.

implying that astarion is at fault here would be indicative of the very attitude I am trying to oppose ─ the idea that people either have agency or don't, and if they do bad things with agency they are evil, but if they don't have agency they are victims. astarion is both ─ he is the victim of horrendous, harrowing trauma and yet he has done bad things and in fact visited that same trauma upon other people. there's no escaping this, and i think it would be bad for astarion to just brush everything he did for cazador under the rug because he did it for cazador. he still did those things ─ he might not be culpable, i do not think he can be considered as such, but there's no way you go through all of that and don't feel guilty for it.

notably, if shadowheart kills aylin and wyll kills karlach (if he can? i actually don't even know if he can do that, but hypothetically), they are still responsible for that action and it was still morally wrong. they have to deal with that: part of dealing with it can be to recognise the coercion they were subject to, but the fact that they lacked agency doesn't just erase the wrong or mean it was never wrong in the first place. likewise, astarion becoming the ascended vampire is still obviously a terrible thing to happen for him and everyone else, and is in no way justified just because it might finally give him the sense of safety and control he craves. the whole point of that moment is that even when he is being retraumatised, when he has returned to the place and person that hurt him, astarion has the capacity to choose, and to choose the right thing. acting as though his trauma means he has absolutely no agency whatsoever and so never has to address the fact that he can, at various points, greatly fuck up, just removes one of the biggest themes of his whole character.

tldr: astarion has agency, one of his greatest challenges is realising that he does and that he must use it responsibly, and acting as though that is not the case does a disservice to his character and the story it is trying to tell. also it is deeply deeply boring. the end.

[aelswiths]

this shot haunts me

[knight-of-skyloft]

Kalmoash to be mean

(also tagging @aridotdash who asked me about them as well!)

This isn't mean! I love talking about Kalmoash! I seem to enjoy them differently than most of Tumblr though 😅

They're just so fucked up. Moash's love and admiration getting warped and twisted by his self-loathing until he wants to see a precious thing destroyed? YES. Kaladin leaving himself open and vulnerable because he can't let Moash go, he can't give up on him even now? YES. Remember when Moash told Navani "you have no idea what this day will cost me"? It's going to cost him Kaladin. Kaladin will be dead, he'll have broken, Moash will be proven right, and part of him knows it's not going to matter. The person he wants dead is going to die, again, and it's not going to be enough, again. And at no point does it occur to him that he can just stop. I'm screaming.

See, I can talk about them forever 😂

[bloodymoonxvampire]

So, I have an announcement to make.

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[ama-the-weeb]

for those who are interested in my hetaloid content, heres a lil update! later today or tomorrow, still not fully sure when yet, the next duo will be released: taiwan and seychelles! ((yes, the girlfriends!! (yeah i ship them let me enjoy my ship in peace thanks))) right now, i only have taiwan done, so have this sneak peak...

song is palette, ust by HaruVampire...

here is where id put her download link, but not yet, im not releasing her on her own, i like releasing hetaloids in lil groups (duos or trios\

[thesmokinpossum]

You know, I used to be one of those person who believed that we should not shame people for their individual habits when it comes to climate changes but focus on the industries and I still believe that it's a more pressing issues in many ways but like…

Ever since I started working at the post office, I just cannot feel the same. I'm genuinely disgusted by the amount of people who will return 10, 15, shit even 20+ parcels on a weekly basis. There's people I see doing this every saturday like clockwork.It's pretty clear that they had no need for any of the bullshit they ordered, they just wanted the little rush of getting some parcel in the mail.

It's also almost always from the same 3 website (Amazon, Shein and Temu) so they're not only actively destroying the environment (and seriously, I think it's hard to realize how much plastic and fuel all those returns take if you haven't seen it first hand -just the amount of tape we use on them on a daily basis is enough to make me sick-), they also contribute to horrible working conditions for so many people so yeah, at this point I do think we need to start applying some shame to all that bs tbh

[miodiodavinci]

MR. DAVINKY I KNOW YOU DONT KNOW ME BUT YOU RESPONDED TO MY BF ABOUT SALVADOR ON YT. HES RIGHT.

You have no idea how much Salvador means to us we NEED more salva-lore ASAP I'm clawing at the door I'm making loud animal noise RHARATARRAH

AKJDHLAJDHLKAJDHLKAJD I'M LOSING MY MIND YOU'RE TOO KIND A A A A A

as a thank you i want to offer you legitimately All The Lore I Have on post-lychgate salvador—please do with this what you will KJADLAHJ

GENERAL WORLD BUILDING

“Garage kit idols” are a semi-independent response to the international phenomenon that is H○○○○○○ M○○○ and company.

Almost all formal “garage kit” talent begins at one of the many production, distribution, and management offices spread across the country. These offices provide approved talent agencies with the development kits necessary to “scout” new idols.

Of these development kits, there are several packages available (each being more expensive and in-depth than the last), most of which include a rudimentary neural net, a foundational chassis, an instructional guide, and the software required to “train” the net.

The lowest end packages include only the fundamental elements necessary for a functional idol, such as the capacity for CV voice synthesis, basic dance coordination, and a semi-life-like “face,” while more expensive and in-depth packages support multiple vocal libraries, more life-like bodies, additional personality modules, added expressive bonuses, and more.

To prevent damages to the office’s reputation, however, most offices require that an agency aiming to “scout” a new idol must first submit an application stating—among other things—their project plans and a three year timeline of what they hope to accomplish with their idol. If approved, this plan becomes a three year contract, at the end of which the agency and idol will be evaluated and potentially brought on for a full seven year office-endorsed contract.

While some “garage kit idols” have achieved near legendary status (such as K○○○○○ T○○○), many of these idols do not survive their three year trial period. Those who do not have their license and warranty revoked (the consequences of which depend on the office), and often are encouraged to be decommissioned and recycled to make way for a new, hopefully more successful generation. In years pasts, some idols have even forcibly decommissioned following grave transgressions or scandals.

That being said, plenty of former “garage kit idols” merely slip under the radar once their time is up, and go on to become independent, non-idol performers, or even leave the music industry all together. Repairs, however, often become an issue after three to five years of unserviced use. Often, it is difficult to find a former “garage kit idol” who’s been out of warranty for more than five or so years.

All this being said, of course, this process only accounts for “formal Garage Kit talent.” There are plenty of independently developed vocal androids, though they’re not often seen beyond local and private performances. They’re definitely more resource intensive to produce, though many fans argue most have more heart in them than any “Garage Kit Idol” ever will.

SALVADOR’S PERSONAL TIMELINE

Originally created by a small team of five individuals as the “garage kit idol” M○○○○○ using a modest but lower-end dev kit, his agency’s plan was to—by the end of this three years—make him reasonably popular in a local area, book three sold out in-house performances, and sell at least 300 CDs across all three years. 

With spirits high and hope abound, he received a great deal of support and enthusiasm from his agency in the first year.

Though a lot of prospective fans at the time weren’t interested in getting emotionally invested in a “garage kit idol” (considering they’re a dime a dozen and probably wouldn’t last more than three years anyhow), by 8 months into his career, SALVADOR had developed a small, dedicated fan following that ensured that most street meets and housed performances drew in a crowd of at least 15 to 30 people. By 9 months in, they'd booked their first "sold-out" show in a small venue near his normal stomping grounds.

Hands were shaken, CDs were sold, and the numbers bolstered the spirit of the agency. It seemed like the dream would come true.

Side note: it's vaguely around in here that he first picked up his "rival," Ayano, who somehow kept setting up shop on the same street as him, much to his annoyance. His initial impression was that she was gruff, crude, and wholly unsuited for idol work, though over time he stopped looking down his nose at her and started finding a certain charm in how she'd unabashedly yell at people who didn't tip well, or leap off her stand to viciously beat up any critics.

... Unfortunately, however, the numbers plateaued and fell rather than climb. Dedicated fans would still roll up to the regular performances (and SALVADOR's popularity managed to just scrape in enough ticket sales for a second show), but the company was nowhere close to breaking 100 CDs, much less selling out another show. The company spirit dampened.

All the while, SALVADOR's feelings surrounding performing started to become muddled, leaving him frustrated and uneasy before shows and bordering on nauseous after. He slowly grew to resent the way his fans looked at him, and often lost himself in thought wishing that he could have any other idol's fans instead.

He really, honestly, truly looked to Ayano as a source of light during this time, and wished he could have the confidence she had to bite patrons who so much as looked at her funny. Unfortunately, she disappeared out of the blue one day, and never returned to idol work.

More than a few fans started to complain that SALVADOR seemed “insincere” and “curt” during fan meets and off-stage encounters, which the agency redirected unto SALVADOR swiftly. His attempts at confessing his problems and seeking support were met with pointed comments and implied blame for his lack of success, which all but turned the latch on his heart, causing him to bury his discontent in as deep a hole as he could muster.

By the midway point of year two, it was becoming clear the dream wasn’t panning out. His growing revulsion privately festering in his heart, SALVADOR poured every bit of himself into his idol persona, increasingly his workload exponentially in an attempt to get his agency back on his side. Most fans stopped coming after a while once the concerts started to feel more and more desperate.

The final months before the contract expired were spent in a pitiful, frantic haze saturated with self-advertisement, frantic CD sales, enlistment of what few agency members would call him back (though these dwindled by the day), and desperate attempts at avoiding his fate. Many who knew him at the time would remember seeing him overburdened with cheaply printed CDs, begging anyone who would listen (in perfect idol fashion, however), to “buy a CD and rescue a poor aspiring idol from her demise.” When merch ran out, he sold anything he could get his hands on (as long as it came with several CDs).

The final nail in the coffin was the first and only concert SALVADOR booked himself, which he spent months preparing and advertising for (in hopes of meeting the third successful performance goal), only to open for a practically empty house composed primarily of drifters and only half-interested strangers (their enthusiasm not at all helped by the physical damage he’d obtained only a few days prior). He went "home" to a warranty expiration warning pushed under the office door, and nothing but empty voicemails from the people who had brought him into the world.

The months following the contract’s expiration remain a dark, hazy blur. Lots of unanswered calls, heart-wrenching notices, and persistent harassment by representatives of the office that had originally leased out SALVADOR's dev kit to begin with. Of course, no one from his agency was around to answer calls, so SALVADOR was left alone to bare the brunt of the responsibility (another point that they leveraged against him in an attempt to get him to retire).

In the midst of it all, SALVADOR started his transition. Months of harassment had brought his emotions to a boiling point (he all but marinated in an ever-constant stew of self-loathing, disgust, and frustration), and though it'd originally been in an attempt to escape the solicitation, cutting his hair ended up shedding some light on everything he’d felt before.

He slipped out of the office in the middle of the night and skipped town, ditching his uniform in favor of a pair of cheap coveralls and taking the first train that would have him. He still remembers staring into his reflection in the window, fans blasting hot air, terrified that he'd made some mistake (but also feeling a kind of lightness and euphoria he'd never felt before).

He ended up settling a couple cities away, far from the heart of the "garage kit idol" phenomenon. Unable to seek repairs for his last minute injuries (and finding that of the few android repair shops there were, none would take him without reassurance that he was still under warranty), he started researching mechanics on his own, patching himself up and offering some services to newfound acquaintances on the side.

In time, his skills had earned him some notoriety—at least to the point that his name had made it to the ears of some powerful friends, who were more than willing to lease him a workshop to continue his craft (the moment he first turned the lights on will remain burned in his memory forever).

And so the new SALVADOR began: a repair mechanic who’s first job was taking himself apart and rebuilding himself in a new image, completely separate from his idol past—a past he was certain would remained buried up until a certain former "rival" re-entered his life.

[cerealmonster15]

im having. treycay fic idea.

[daemonduality]

I guess as an icebreaker for both new and old...

Send me a 🍅 for my opinion on your food preferences based on what I've seen in your blog. I'll make a dinner out of it with appetizer/soup, main course, and dessert.