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artists-ally · 7 months

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{Confess Your Lust} Reader x Azriel

You all can thank @riddlesb1tch for this. I have no regrets. It's just pure filth, but I know my whores like this 🥰 Rose this is all for you so you're the only one I care about liking it. Hope you all enjoy, title is from this song. highly suggest listening to while reading btw

Word Count: 4,682

Warnings: SMUT. Minor Dom/Sub concepts, bondage, degrading, teasing, orgasm delay/denial, overstimulation, Az is your pretty little good boy and you're gonna let him know ;)

Tagging: @riddlesb1tch @thelov3lybookworm @librafairy @needylilgal022 @bubybubsters @harrystylesfan2686 @justdreamstars @cyrygher @berryzxx @thehighladywrites @xaithings

Summary: Azriel requested a very special birthday present. And who were you to tell him no.

~~~~~~~

“Cassian, as long as I’ve known you, you’ve gotten me a dagger for my birthday.”

“Yup,” he grins.

“You know it’ll never suffice to Truth Teller, right?”

“An Illyrian can hope,” Cassian sighs, a relaxed smile on his face. “I know they all go in a drawer at the bottom of your dresser.”

Azriel rolls his eyes, but thanks his brother anyway. He appreciates them, but they hold no candle to the pretty piece of steel sat on his thigh.

Mor had gifted him a new pair of boots and a matching belt to go with them. They were of sleek leather, polished so well he could see his distorted reflection in the curve of the toe. He might have to set them aside for a special occasion so he doesn’t ruin them with training and missions.

Rhys and Feyre gifted him a custom made weapons display case. It had racks and shelves for all his favorites, as well as drawers for the ones Cassian constantly gifted. It was complete with a throwing pad on the side to practice different strikes as well as a sharpening stone. He’d never admit to anyone but himself, but it made the back of his throat string.

Amren promised him a night out at Rita’s, and coming from her it was quite generous.

Buy my gift… it was something to be shared between my mate and no one else. They didn’t need to know the secret behind the look in my eye. It was waiting at our newly constructed home, just like I promised. Just like he had asked.

“That’s it from us, I don’t see another one here,” Cassian looked around the rubble of discarded bags and decorative paper, not finding any other boxes. “Did Yn already give you hers?”

“No,” I said, sipping my glass of wine. “It’s back at the house. But he already knows what it is.”

“He does?”

“He does?” Azriel furrowed his brows, clearly not remembering the conversation the two of us had several months ago.

Azriel sauntered into the dining hall, hands fisted at his sides, wings tucked in close. “Can I talk to you?”

The sudden spring of worry in his eyes made me put down my book, following him to a nearby couch to sit on.

“What’s up, my love?” I asked tenderly, locking a piece of hair behind his ear.

“If I asked you to do something for me- to me… would you?”

“I’m not sure I understand what you mean, Az,” I cocked my head to the side, getting a better look at his eyes. Those wicked shadows blocked some of his tan skin, so I gently nudged them out of the way.

“I umm- I was thinking that we might change some things up. I’ve had a lot of thoughts about these things and I want them. And I want to see if you could want them too.”

“Okay,” I nodded, waiting for a response.

“I want to try using some toys. On me.”

Well, that is not where I thought this was going to go at all. Utterly shocked, but not opposed to the idea, I asked him to elaborate. And by the Cauldron did he. He went into detail of what he wanted, why he wanted it, how he wanted it… it sounded like a dream come true.

“I’m so happy you told me about this. Yes, I’d be more than happy to fulfill these fantasies with you,” I smiled eagerly. “I promise I’ll make it special for you. Just like you did for me.”

Azriel still didn’t seem to get it, so I flashed a mental image down the bond, watching his brows unfurrow and raise up his face. It was almost ridiculous how far they went up. Nobody else said anything as they watched the interaction.

“Oh.”

“Oh… what? What did she get you?” Rhys prodded his brother, Azriel not breaking our eye contact. I just smirked, winking in his direction before turning back to the wine. Mor spared me a curious glance, but I gave away no details. The others didn’t need to know what happened behind those closed doors.

“Just something to play with later,” Azriel swallowed, throat working down and then back up. Only I would be able to note the change in his scent. “Time for pastries?”

I giggled as he deflected the question and moved onto another topic. It was another hour or so before anyone made a move to leave, but as soon as Cassian rolled out, his hands were all over me.

“Are you being serious?” His hands were cupping my cheeks, a desperate plea to his voice.

“Of course, my shadow. Go on up, get yourself ready. I’ll be up in a little bit, okay? Send word when you’re ready,” I instruct, moving out of his reach to begin cleaning up some of the mess left behind from the small party.

“Won’t you come do it for me?” His strong arms wrapped around me, the soft scent of his wings wafting in the air. “I could really use your help.”

“I thought you wanted me to take control?”

“I do, that’s why I-”

“Didn’t I give you an order?”

“Y-Yes, I just wanted-”

“Then go. Don’t make me ask again, Azriel.”

“Yes my lady,” he obediently replied. I watched him go up the stairs, shadows lingering behind before darting after him. Once I heard the door click softly shut, I continued my work around the living area and the kitchen. I didn’t have any desire to be cleaning, I just needed to build up some tension. For this to work as he wanted to, I needed to do the unpredictable. Which would be really fucking difficult since he is basically progammed to know every turn and corner.

I threw out trash, packed dishes in the sink, scrubbed them clean and put them away. About five minutes ago he sent a shadow curling my way, enticing me up towards the play room. I ignored the urgency of the call, deciding I’ll go when I want to. And he’s just going to have to wait.

Azriel isn’t the most patient creature in this world, that’s for damn sure.

Making him wait this long would be torture.

Precisely how I wanted it to be.

Finally, after another ten-ish minutes of stalling, I make my way upstairs. Purposefully being as loud as I can without stomping up the stairs. My heels click gently across the hard stone. As I near the door, I am hit with a wave of arousal coming from the room. It’s thick and tastes devine on the back of my tongue.

The sight of him sitting in the chair, wings facing me, arms ready and waiting behind his back is a marvelous sight. I can’t help but smile. He looks so pretty.

“I thought you forgot about me,” Azriel said, a smirk in his tone. “Is it time for my present yet?”

“So impatient, all of you Illyrians,” I snorted, rolling my eyes as I made my way to the wall in front of him. Hung up, there were various toys and playthings. All could be used for pleasure or pain, depending on the mood. “You’ll get it when I say you do. Give me your wrists.”

I held the bundle of rope between my palms, stalking back over to Azriel in his chair. As I pass around to where his hands are locked behind his back, I make sure to tell him he’s allowed to safeword if and whenever he needs to.

“I know, my love, thank you. I know you’ll take care of me,” he smiles gently, offering his lips.

“You asked to be overwhelmed, so I’m not going to stop unless you give me the word. I want you begging me to stop, remember? You’ll sound so pathetic and pretty when you whimper,” I smiled sickly sweet, pecking his lips with my own. “Ready?”

He gave a firm nod, hazel eyes locking on my body as I pulled away.

Back at the wall, I open the drawer in the chest, finding those two boxes I hid away weeks ago. How he never found them, I’ll never know, but I’m so glad. One was a vibrating cuff. The other was a dildo.

After taking them out of the box and sanitizing them, I left them there for Az to see, but not to use yet. No, I wanted the anticipation to do the work for me. Rather than giving him what he wanted, I made my way over to him and trailed my fingers around his frame.

Every flick of my finger sent goosebumps slithering across his skin. Up his neck… down his arms. That sensitive place between his wings twitched as I trailed through it, delicately applying pressure on the muscle.

“Fuck, baby you… you can’t tease me like that.”

“I think I can do whatever I want,” I replied. “You are tied up at my mercy, aren’t you?”

“Yes, my lady.”

“Good boy,” I smiled, threading my fingers through his thick hair, latching onto his scalp. I pulled to the side, watching his body move with the force. His chest rose and fell, I could feel his heartbeat down the bond. Wicked. Powerful. Anticipating my next move.

I slid into his lap, feeling just how much he needed me through his pants. I leaned just far enough away that he couldn't capture my mouth with his. He tried twice to kiss me, but each time I leaned away, a sick smile on my lips.

Azriel scoffed, “I just wanted a kiss.”

“I know you do, but I didn’t give you permission, did I?” I mocked, leaning in closer and closer. “Your pleasure belongs to me tonight. I decide when you get what you’ve earned. And all you’ve done so far is complain that I haven’t given you anything. That’s not how good boys behave is it?”

I can see the fire in his eyes, those two sides of his personality fighting each other head on. This desire inside him to be taken care of, to be set free by my control versus that blistering need to be in control of everything.

I’ll break him free with my bare hands if I have to.

“Don’t be shy, my shadow. You can say it, it’s okay. No one can hear you besides me. Unless you want everyone to know just how much you need me.”

“I’ll behave,” he recites quickly. “Please.”

“Look at you, begging for it already,” I smirked, standing up from my place in his lap. He groans, cock clearly straining against the fabric covering his legs.

I circle him. Like a predator to its prey. “You look so pretty tied up, my shadow.”

“When I asked you to play with me, I didn’t expect to be tortured.”

“Tortured?” I spun around to see his hazy eyes. “Oh, my sweet love, I haven’t even touched you yet and you’re already begging? Don’t be so pathetic, Azriel. You can take more, can’t you?” I nodded his head for him, fingers fisted in his hair. “Yes you can, good boy.”

I quickly walked around to see his pink cheeks, heated with humiliation. I had no intention of going easy on him the first time.

In a swift motion, I sheathed the blade at his thigh, cutting away his pants, leaving him just in his undershorts. He gasped, eyes going wide as roughly pulled them down his hips. “Y-Yn what are you-”

“Quiet,” I demanded.

Azriel shut his mouth, panting heavily as I fisted his cock in my hand. His head tipped back in pleasure, and I almost let myself enjoy it for a second before I ripped my hand away. Those fierce hazel eyes were back on mine in an instant, silently begging for more. He made a wounded sound when I walked away, grabbing the vibrating cuff from the dresser.

“Let’s play a game, okay? I put this on, and you aren’t going to cum. If you take it like the good boy I know you are, then I’ll give you something else to play with. If you cum… well, you’re just not going to stop.”

Azriel looks genuinely afraid. Like I might break him if I go through with this. I’ve never wanted to break something so badly just to put it back together again.

I kneel in front of him, spreading his knees apart. I can see the generous amount of gel he’s used to work himself open for later. His body is glowing, vibrating with tension. I spit on his dick, enjoying the sight of him flinching as it hits his hot skin.

Being extra agonizing, I blow some cool air on his tip to really watch him jump. I giggle, sliding the cuff over his length. The pale blue color is a stark contrast to his bright red skin. There is a button near the bass to turn it on and to switch the intensity. The gentle purr of the toy comes to life with a quick tap, and Azriel damn near falls out of the chair.

“Relax,” I say, forcing his knees down. I looked up at him, chest unmoving as he held his breath. “Breath Azriel.”

“I- I can-can’t,” he chokes. “Fuck Yn, it’s too much.”

“It’s only on the first setting, you’ll get used to it. In thirty seconds I’m going to put it on the next setting,” I warn, watching the way his body quivers slightly.

My mates eyes are slammed shut, teeth clenched together. His cock gently pulses with the vibe, slick trickling down his shaft in a steady stream. To be a little extra mean, I run my tongue up the length.

“Oh gods Yn…” he pleads, head tossed back. His chest is on display, perfectly cut muscles constricting with every breath.

“You’re being so good, Azriel,” I praise, relishing in the way his body relaxes into the words. “Just a little longer.”

I stand, walking to the corner of the room to the closet. I quietly wheel out the next part of his surprise, setting them aside for when I need them. When I come back, I notice the sheen of sweat lining his chest and torso. It glimmers in the low light, catching at all the right angles.

I stroke my hands up and down his shoulders, working the tense muscles. He relaxes into my body and I travel further. Over his chest, over his abs, down his thighs. When I reach his cock, I press the next button and turn up the intensity.

Az growls. In a way I’ve never heard him before. He curls in on himself, kicking his feet against the floor.

“Don’t act like you don’t love it, Azriel. I know you want to be my good boy and take your birthday present so well. You’re gonna take it until I tell you you’ve had enough.”

“It feels so good,” he moans. His thighs are shaking, his cock flushed almost purple. “M-More.”

“And now you’re begging for it? Gods, Az you are so easy for me. I’m sure if you'd found this before tonight, I would’ve caught you with it, huh? So fucking desperate.” I can’t help but tease him, he makes it so easy. And he is being so good for me, why not give him what he wants? “You asked for more, Azriel.”

I click it up another notch, watching the way it sends shock waves through the muscles in his thighs and abs. He’s open-mouth panting now, unable to take a breath without whining. He starts shaking his head back and forth, eyes blinking rapidly.

“You’re not allowed to cum, Azriel. I didn’t give you permission.”

My reminder makes him sob. “Please, please Yn. Fucking please let me cum. Fuck I-I can’t- Yn I can’t-”

“You’re going to,” I demand, pushing the hair out of his face. “Because I told you to. You wanna make me happy, right? I won’t be happy if you cum. You don’t wanna disappoint me, do you?”

He shakes his head no rapidly, sweat dripping down his face.

“Then don’t cum. It’s not that hard.”

Azriel cries out, the noise coming deep within his chest. He tries to cross his legs to relieve the pressure, but I force them to stay open. He shakes and writhes, wings slanted behind his back in a mess of shadows. He cannot sit still, but I don’t reprimand him for it.

The room is filled with the sound of his harsh breathing and the hum of the vibrator. It’s filled with the scent of his sweat and breath.

“Yn- Yn turn it off.”

“No.”

He curses, a colorful menagerie falling from his wet lips. “Please please please please please please.”

The sound of him begging, truly begging, makes me grin in a sinister way. This is exactly how I wanted him. A whimpering, desperate mess for me to play with.

I turn it off.

Azriel blows out a breath, body still writhing. His cock stands tall, a deep shade of maroon. I know one flick of my tongue would send him over the edge. And having that kind of power over him feels incredible.

After letting him rest for a second, I decide it’s time for some real fun. I pluck the dildo off the dresser and stand in front of Azriel, waiting for him to look up at me. When those hazel eyes meet mine, they’re glassy and full of pleasure. Almost too much. He looks drunk with his cheeks so rosy and ears flaming red. He looks so adorable all fucked out like this.

“Stand,” I commanded, watching the words register on his face.

His knees tremble, but he manages, stretching his taught legs. The sight of him shaking so vividly would normally scare me. But right now it's… it's beautiful. I made him this way, and this ache between my legs couldn't be stronger.

The cup on the end suctions to the metal chair when I place the dildo down. “Sit.”

“Yn-”

“Sit,” I snapped, eyes hardening. Azriel swallowed, looking from me to the chair and back. “Don’t make me ask again. I told you to sit. So sit down. Now.”

He turned back around, standing above the chair. Slowly, incredibly slowly, he lowered himself to the chair. His arms were bulging against the ropes, veins running along his biceps throbbing with his pulse. But he sits. All the way down.

With a proud smile, I drink in the way he sits. It's so rigid. His chest barely moves with his quick breaths. His eyes are screwed shut.

“Azriel,” I taunt, my voice sickly sweet. “What's got you breathing so hard, hmm? Are you in too much pleasure? Does it feel too good?”

His mouth gapes open, but he doesn’t say anything.

“You’re at a loss for words with how good you feel. So fucking pathetic, completely fucked out the first time you’re taking a toy?” I click on the vibrator again, starting at level two. He thrashes, then grunts, tossing his head back. “You can take it. You’ve been such a good boy. You’ve been pleasing me so much, Azriel, did you know that? You’re making me so happy. Keep being a good boy and I’ll let you cum.”

“Yn…” he breathed, head falling back to meet my eyes.

“What do you need, my shadow? More? You want more?” He shakes his head no, but remains silent. “You can do better than a pitiful shake of your head. Tell me what you want, Azriel.”

“Yn… Yn…” he chants, my name a plea of desperation. It's airy and full of need.

“That’s it, baby. Tell me what you need, I promise I’ll give it to you.”

With bleary eyes, he looks at me. “Please let me cum.”

The words are broken and a little slurred, but he told me what he needed. So I’ll give it to him.

“Such a good boy, Azriel. Telling me how much you need to cum. I’ll make sure you do, baby. Just keep taking it for me. You’re doing soooo good.”

I kept talking to him, praising him for how good he’s taking everything I’ve given him. Azriel is babbling and pleading like a total whore. While he drones on and on, I wheel out the surprise I set in the corner. Three long, vertical mirrors are set around him so he can see every angle of his perfect body.

So he can watch himself come undone without me even touching him.

“Azriel, look at me baby,” I commanded. He settles his gaze on me, then the mirrors. “Don’t you think you look so pretty?”

The way his body slumps in the chair sent chills down my spine. He spread his legs, admitting the cuff constricting his cock. Azriel pushes on his toes lightly, bobbing up and down on the dildo. “Fuck I- Yn I look so…so-”

“I want you to keep your eyes locked on the mirror. Don’t look at anything but yourself. This is all for you, take it all in, my shadow. Enjoy watching yourself fall apart for me.”

Azriel nodded.

I circled him slowly, amused at how… delicate he looked despite the harsh reality of his current fate. He was tied up, more vulnerable than ever. And yet he looked so sweet and simple. And devastatingly ruined.

At the first touch to the leathery material of his wings, Azriel jumped. He shouted and swore.

“Relax, Azriel.”

“I can’t handle it when you touch my wings, Yn. I’m not gonna be able to hold on,” Az pleads. I touch him again in the same spot. He shudders and grits his teeth. “Yn please.”

“Eyes on yourself, Azriel.”

With a deep, controlled breath, he pulls his eyes back to the mirrors. As I touch and explore the most sensitive parts of him, he twitches in every direction, effectively screwing himself further on the dildo. I take the curve of my nail and trace a vein running in his wing. Fibers in his muscles seize.

In the mirror, I can see the cuff working nicely. His chest is coated in sweat and it takes all my strength to not run my tongue from the tip of his cock to the base of his throat. Instead, I continue to tease his wings.

Azriel has this one specific spot right at the base of his wing that drives him insane. The moment I begin to move my hand, he begins to moan uncontrollably. He begs and whines and begs again for me to make him come.

“Are you watching yourself, baby?” I ask, locking eyes with him in the mirror. When he nods, eyes cast down at his body, I stroke his wing. Twice. And tears spill down his face.

“F-Fuck Yn I need to cum. I need to cum, fuck PLEASE let me cum please please please,” Azriel chants like I’m a long forgotten god. As if I would be able to grant all his wishes and desires. And it fills me with a fire I’ve never felt before.

“You’ve been such a good boy, Azriel. Go ahead. You can cum, let go.”

The second I gave him permission, he came. His whole body convulsed with the force. His legs and torso shivered, ecstasy pouring out of him with every whine and curse.

“Fuuuucccckkkkk,” he mewls, watching his cum slide down his cock, spreading over his thighs. The cuff keeps vibrating, drawing out his pleasure. “Turn it off turn it off turn it off-”

“Don’t you wanna see how far you can go? You look so pretty when you cum, I could keep watching you forever, my dear. Why don’t you do it again, okay? You’ve earned it, go ahead and cum for me, just once more.”

His whole body is flush, the same beautiful color as his aching cock. He strains against the ropes and for a minute I think he’s going to break free. But he falls slack, a steady wave of whimpers as the cuff continues to drain him. The flow of it never stops.

After a few more seconds to enjoy the show for myself, I turn off the vibrator. I gently slide it off, the majority of his seed landing on my fingers. I make a bog show of licking it off for him.

Azriel is lost in his mind somewhere when I begin to undo the ropes. I massage his shoulders, working blood back into his extremities.

“You did such an amazing job, my love. I am so proud of you, I hope you had as good of a time as I did.”

Azriel stayed quiet, but he nodded his head, gulping down air. He was shaking, but judging by the way the bond felt, he felt nothing but euphoria. I had done exactly what I was asked, and he loved it.

While I kneaded his shoulders, kissing up and down his back, he recovered. While I was strong, I wasn’t strong enough to lift a fully grown Illyrian warrior and carry him to the bathroom. Currently, he’s in no condition to move under his own volition, so we’ll take our time until his strength is restored.

“I love you so much, Az. My beautiful, strong mate. You did such a good job, such a good boy for me.”

“Mmm,” he hummed, a lazy smile on his lips. “Love being your good boy.”

“You are, you did so fucking good Azriel. It was so hot watching you cum like that,” I smiled, kissing his forehead, then his lips when he pursed them to me. “Feeling good enough to get to the bathroom? The tub is waiting, ready for you.”

My mate nodded, “Only if you’ll come in with me.”

Giggling, I slung his arm over my shoulder. “Of course I will. Stand up slowly, take your time. I’ve got you.”

With a few hisses as he stood up off the chair, wings splaying out to help him keep his balance, I guided him to the bathroom. He could stand just… not super well. We stumbled, but made it to the tub in one piece. I left him to climb in as I stripped, adding some salts to the bath.

“I don’t care about that, just get in, my love.”

Illyrians, not known for their extended patience, but they are known for their incredible brutality and bravery.

As well as their wingspans.

Before he could yank me in with my clothes on, I swept them away with a flick of my hand and climbed in. Azriel guided me to sit in his lap, face to face. His warm, scar-flecked hands caressed my body. It wasn’t in a particularly sexual manner, but I was far too turned on to not let a whimper slip. But he didn’t smirk or crack a teasing joke, he just continued to roam my body.

It seemed to calm him, the edges of ecstasy fading away from the bond one strand at a time. His heart rate slowed and that glaze over his eyes faded away.

“Feeling okay?” I asked, stroking my hands up and around the tattoos on his shoulders and chest.

“Mhmm,” he nodded. “Just… wow. My body feels so tingly.”

“Now you know how I feel when you make me cum multiple times.”

Azriel smiled, sending my heart tumbling in my chest. “Guess I should be a bit more gracious with you, shouldn’t I? Considering now you have what you need to retaliate.”

“I think you’d like it if I retaliated,” I grin. “I’m glad you had a good time.”

“Good time? I’ve never felt so satisfied in my whole life. Thank you for giving me that experience.”

I smiled so wide it hurt. “Of course, my shadow. But the next time you want to have a ‘new experience’, don’t hesitate to wait so long to tell me.”

“I promise,” Azriel whispers, cupping both sides of my face with his hands. Our foreheads lean in together. “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

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marvelsmylife · 3 months

Text

That damn lingerie gift

Pairing: Cassian x reader

Plot: you bond with Nesta over the fact you don’t like that Cassian gifted Mor lingerie during solstice.

A/N I was in an angsty mood and decided to write this. Let me know if you would be interested in a part two and if Cassian should be given a second chance or if the reader should end up with someone else

Masterlist

It was meant to be a gag gift, but knowing your mate gifted another female lingerie on solstice made your heartbreak, and he was too oblivious to notice. You knew of their past, and while you didn’t like it, you never prohibited him from talking to her. You wanted to be the fun mate who let her mate speak and hang out with his exes whenever he wanted. Unfortunately, because you didn’t set boundaries earlier on in your relationship, Mor thought she could ask for such risqué gifts.

Nesta sent you a sympathetic look, knowing she was in your shoes once before she found out the Eris was her mate. She expressed to Cassian how uncomfortable she was with the idea of her boyfriend gifting such an intimate item to another female. Because of that, she felt the need to ask if you were ok with what just happened. She motioned towards the front door, indicating if you wanted to go outside, and you nodded yes.

Once outside you broke down in Nesta’s arms. She let you cry it out until you couldn’t anymore before suggesting you take a walk to cool off. Throughout that walk, you vented to her how uncomfortable you were with how Cassian interacted with Mor. You told her how it sometimes felt like they were flirting, and every time you brought it up, he would deny it. He would say that she was the past and Mor was only interested in females now.

To your surprise, Nesta began to share stories of what went on during her relationship with Cassian. She told you she wasn’t surprised that Cassian responded to you that way because he did the same with her. “I guess I didn’t leave Cassian sooner because I was scared of being alone. I thought it would be better to tolerate being disrespected like that. Funny enough, the day I found the courage to break up with Cassian was the day I found out I was Eris’ mate. Eris witnessed the breakup and offered me refuge at the autumn court.”

You looked at Nesta with admiration, “I want to leave him, but I’m scared,” you admitted.

“Don’t be. If you wish to leave him, you should. I wish I listened to my instincts when they told me to leave. It would have saved me tears and sleepless nights. If you are worried about where to go Eris and I would be happy to have you in the autumn court. We can find you a job within the court. Just say the word,” Nesta replied right as you returned to the house.

“I’ll think about it. I might go back to the summer court for a bit just to see family, but moving to the autumn court does sound appealing,” you replied before opening the front door.

As soon as you and Nesta stepped foot inside the house Cassian was berating you about leaving without telling him. “I’m sorry, but you were too busy gifting another female lingerie to notice I left in the first place.”

The room fell silent at your words because they knew this was going to happen. Mor wanted to make light of the situation and replied, “Geez y/n, you need to chill. It’s just a gag gift Cassian gives me every year. It’s not like I put it on for him. Although I have offered in the past.”

You turned to Mor, “Shut the fuck up. I wasn’t talking to you.” Mor looked at you stunned, as you began to yell, “It’s bad enough you’ve fucked my mate. You asking him to buy you lingerie and passing it as a gag gift is so fucking tacky of you. I hope whatever poor soul that gets shackled to you gifts their friend lingerie in front of you so you know how it feels!”

Everyone’s eyes widened at your rant because you’ve never spoken to anyone like that before. You were so quiet and timid they didn’t think you would be capable of saying something like that. Cassian was going to reply, but you just pushed past him and went straight to your room.

As soon as you were gone, Amren began to clap and earned looks from her friends, “What? She’s right. It’s fucking weird that Cassian gets Mor lingerie every solstice. I honestly thought it would have stopped when he dated Nesta, but I was wrong.” Amren turned to Cassian and said, “Maybe this time you’ll listen to your significant other, seeing as she’s your mate.”

Cassian bolted towards your room at Amren’s words and was getting ready to grovel for your forgiveness. Unfortunately, you locked the door and refused to reply to his pleas. Growing annoyed, Cassian started banging on your door repeatedly. “Come on y/n, stop being a bitch and open this door so we can talk like actual adults,” Cassian regretted saying those words as soon as they slipped out of his mouth. He knew you weren’t being unreasonable, and he would be livid if he was in your position.

You swung open your bedroom door only to reveal you were holding two suitcases. “Where are you going?” Cassian asked in a panic tone.

“Back to the summer court. I will not stand by and be so fucking disrespected, especially by my mate,” you pushed past Cassian and started making your way to the front door. You turned towards everyone watching the scene unfold before them, “Azriel, can you please take me to the summer court? I can’t stand to be in the presence of that brute any long.”

To Cassian’s horror, Azriel nodded his head and started walking towards you, “You can’t go. You can’t leave me after one little mistake.”

You let out a dry laugh at Cassian’s response, “The thing is, this isn’t the first time you've done this. How many times have you gifted Mor lingerie while dating Nesta?” You waited for Cassian to respond, but he didn’t, so you continued, “She told me you did it all five years you were together. Five times! And the worst thing about it is that she voiced that she was uncomfortable with you doing that, and you ignored her.”

Everyone cringed as you verbally destroyed Cassian. “You were so insecure about the fact that I was involved with Tarquin before we got together that I stopped talking to him. He was my childhood friend, and I stopped talking to him to make YOU feel better.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t fucking thinking. I’ll stop talking to Mor too if you want, but don’t leave,” Cassian tried to reach out to you, but Azriel blocked him. “Azriel, get out of the way.”

“No,” Azriel replied coldly, “y/n is right, and if she wishes to leave, she will leave.”

Azriel was about to winnow you away when Cassian replied, “Of course, you would say that. You’re still bitter Mor came to me instead of you to help-”

Cassian doesn't get a chance to finish his sentence before Azriel punches him in the face. “Stay away from y/n,” Azriel growled at Cassian before he winnowed you out of the house.

@lilah-asteria @wxhxixtxexroses @melmo567

@mybestfriendmademe

#cassian imagine #cassian x reader #cassian angst #acotar imagine #acotar x reader

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emmitaaa4 · 7 months

Text

“Elriel is too predictable! It’s boring & lazy writing!”

… 🧍‍♂️

My brother in Christ. You call SJM the fated mates author. Through 15+ books and 3 series she hasn’t diverged from that trope. Elain has a “mate”.

If an Elriel outcome is predictable, it’s because the author willed it so and therefore ✨wrote scenes✨ to ✨develop their relationship✨.

and by that i mean…

(long post ahead…. bear with me)

SJM wrote Mr. “I don’t need to resort to poetry” going all Azriel Allan Poe, flustered as he tells Elain “we are born hearing the song of the wind”. She wrote him uncharacteristically open & talkative, while when he 1st met Feyre he deferred all her questions to others.

SJM wrote that despite how different they may look, Elain does not balk from Az. She never has: from their 1st meeting she finds comfort in him, and he in turn notices her—she’s never been afraid of him, he has always seen her.

SJM wrote the 1st coherent thing to come out of Elain’s mouth in WaR to be “beautiful” as she beholds Azriel’s scarred hands. In turn, she wrote our gardener not minding imperfections on hers, for despite her lady-like conditioning, she prefers to get her hands dirty.

SJM wrote Az spending time with her in the sunshine: no forced conversation, no one hEaLinG anyone, just them both doing their own thing as a relaxed Az suns his wings. Just two pals comfortable with one another… which SJM foreshadowed in MaF through Feyre’s “Elain would likely cling to Az for some peace and quiet”.

SJM wrote Az and Cass both stilling at the sight of El & Nes, she wrote Az cutting in to set Elain up in her garden even as Feyre was about to do it, she wrote the mention that Elain was safe after the twin raven’s attack bc Az had stayed with her at the townhouse.

SJM wrote Azriel’s eyes churning as he looks at Elain and her too-thin body, before abruptly winnowing away, and we’re left with Mor looking at the spot where he left. Wonder what that was about (it certainly did not remind me of Rhys in TaR).

You know, Elriels are not just making stuff up and theorizing about the E/ucien bond cause we’re desperately pulling at straws…

SJM had Madja say “a mate would know if something is amiss”, then wrote a scene juxtaposing both Lucien’s and Azriel’s reactions/assessments of what was going on with Elain… and she had Azriel be the one to know nothing was “wrong” with her—no, she just had rare powers and needed to be heard, to be taken seriously. He didn't let her be misunderstood, for he was the ONLY one that listened to her, that took her visions/ramblings seriously right from the get go. And so he gave Elain the understanding she needed to free herself from the dream-like murky realm she was trapped in. Through it all, SJM emphasizes that Azriel also understands what it is like to struggle with rare, strange, prized powers in silence; what it’s like to be othered by them. I’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: she sees everything and he hears everything.

SJM wrote that “Elain had hoped that love would trump even a mating bond” and had her characters question the Cauldron in relation to Elucien *twice* (years apart!).

…

SJM wrote Az being the only one—in a room full of Made beings speaking of being Made—to notice that Elain was missing. A reassuring but empty statement by Cass that they’d get her back….but then it was Azriel that stated, eyes glowing golden, that HE would be getting her back, despite the girl’s own sister discouraging him & telling him he’d die. Hell, Feyre had this whole deliberation on whether she’d join him only after he’d say he’d go. His initiative.

The Hybern scene is too long to add, but this post and this theory break it all down brilliantly.

Yes, Az has sacrificial tendencies. Yes, he’d risk his life for loved ones in general. But we have never seen him this affected, and it is because SJM purposely used language to emphasize Elain and Azriel’s meaningful reactions to the other… despite it being wholly “unnecessary”

It is all intentional… lazy’s antonym.

SJM wrote the Truthteller scene. She emphasized the exchange, which left Cassian gasping and Rhys flabbergasted; it also left Feyre with a significant painting in her mind. It lead to Elain, aka “my God has answered me,” stepping out of a shadow to save her sister. Azriel, aka “God is my help”, indeed helped armed Elain so she could answer her sisters prayers.

SJM ended WaR with Elain’s smile literally lighting up Az’s shadows.

SJM had Elain’s thoughtful gift to him make his eyes the brightest we’ve seen—and by doing so gave us the most beautiful description of his earthy eyes, “the hues of green amid the brown and gray like veins of emerald.” We have never seen Az so joyful & carefree throughout the entire series.

SJM wrote that Azriel beat Feyre to Elain’s side as she was looking out into the night. She wrote Elain stilling at the sight of a dashing Azriel—her throat bobbing—while Az “just moved towards her”.

SJM wrote the potato scene—“sit i’ll take care of it”—Azriel again being the one to respect Elain’s presence & contribution as he makes a room full of his “superiors” wait until Elain finishes tidying herself up (cause girlie wanted to look put together for a certain shadowsinger). Mor gapes, Amren smirks, Rhys talks of Az’s mom… all because of that surprising, singular behaviour from him.

SJM wrote Az making a joke at Amren’s expense upon noticing Elain’s discomfort; our girl’s shoulders indeed relax in relief. THE LIGHT RETURNS IN HER EYES.

SJM has Azriel staying up past 3am with Elain, listening to her speak of something she is passionate of.

SJM wrote Azriel spending an entire convo with his brothers looking out into the garden from the window (SJM mentioned it 4 times yet some still missed it).

SJM wrote Rhys goading Az for a reaction as he quizzes him on Lucien and Grayson; wrote Rhys realizing that Azriel did not want to know what Elain did with Lucien (in the case she did anything). She wrote Azriel nervously stuttering as he asks risks if they need to get the sisters a present… I wonder why.

And Rosehall… SJM wrote ROSEhall: cracktheory this cracktheory that, to the gwonriels I’d say we both know you wouldn’t say it’s irrelevant had SJM chosen to call his estate Tealhall.

~~~~

Keep in mind: SJM could have written those significant scenes and ultimately kept it PG: she could have chosen language that built up a profound platonic relationship.

Yet… in MaF she has Feyre comment that they would be good together—as in make a good *couple*. WaR roles in and they’re both dealing with the very public rejections they went through—but SJM had them build a quiet companionship in the background, while giving them a wealth of scenes of great significance for both their characters, and while using language like “she DEVOURED the sight of him” “he CRADLED her to his chest”. In FaS they are slowly but surely getting over their last loves, and SJM continues developing their connection.

And in ACOSF, in the book that supposedly “ended” Elriel…

SJM wrote Az following the sound of her laugh (😭). “ It’s just lust” PLEASE BFFR.

SJM chose to remind us—THREE times—of the Hybern rescue scene... then had Az tell Cass that he’d know, in his chest, if something happened to Nesta.

SJM had Az longingly stare at the gift Elain gave him every night for a YEAR—mind plagued by thoughts of her—made him so affected by her that he had reactions to every mention of her name in SF, so affected that it took Nes one look at them to notice his feelings, to reach out in comfort upon noticing the pain that keeping himself apart from to her caused him. As SJM said she would, Nes saw through his secret in ACOSF, still it is “his secret to tell, never hers”. After Solstice we are met with a grumpy Azriel, who lost the snowball fight for the 1st time in centuries (i wonder why…).

SJM chose to link his every secret back to his feelings for Elain, as per the bonus . Why does he stay up so late and wake up so early? He longs for Elain so much he can’t sleep. Why is he staying in the HoW? It is too hard to be close to Elain given their circumstances; he must physically distance himself from her. Why has he moved on from Mor after centuries? Elain. Why is he grumpy post Solstice? The argument with Rhys concerning Elain.

~~~~

Ultimately, SJM wrote for Elriel:

- Complementary imagery (flowers and death? light and dark blending together to form something new… DUSK, anyone?)

- AND plot altering scenes

- AND chose to liken them to one another multiple times

- AND genuine moments of companionship that slowly bloomed into something more…

… Is it so insane to believe that maybe SJM spent so much page time and effort building connections & common ground between them because she intends for elain & az to find peace and quiet within one another?

Or idk, maybe it was all for shits and giggles… and if it was i salute her commitment to the shits and the giggles🫡

Either way, it is the opposite of lazy writing…

It’s SJM’s world & words, and we are just reading them.

P.S: This was all just typed on my cell phone from the top of my head… yes remembering all this is probs concerning, yes I am obsessed. Please correct me if I got anything wrong.

#elain archeron #azriel #elriel #pro elriel #azriel shadowsinger #pro elain #pro azriel #acomaf #acowar #acosf #elain x azriel #elucien-bond #antigwynriel #not even anti; just pro common sense

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danikamariewrites · 10 months

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I searched for Feysand x reader all over tumblr and you were one of the top creators so I looked around and fell into the rabbit hole of masterlists… I’ve been on your page for hours now and i’m not tired at all.

And I saw your request were open and i’m so happy bc I wanted to ask if i could request feysand x reader where feyre and reader are pregnant at the same time. Like we all know how protective rhys was in the books, now imagine two mates at the same time. Like his instincts wouldn’t let anyone too close to them bc his mates are in vulnerable situations. Maybe someone like Beron or Tamlin jokes around and Rhys doesn’t handle it well or smth plssss🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

Double Trouble

Feysand x reader

A/n: omg thank you 😭😭 I get nervous that I write too much and that ppl will get sick of me lol. So thank you for reading my fics 💕

Warnings: Tamlin being a douche

Rhys has been more paranoid since you and Feyre both started showing. The revelation of both you being pregnant excited and frightened him at the same time. Causing his over protective mate instincts to kick in. The two of you had tried to get him to rest knowing he had a High Lords meeting coming. But the stubborn male insisted he was fine.

A few times when you got up to pee in the middle of the night - a new routine thanks to your pregnancy - you found Rhys wide awake. He would watch over you and Feyre like a hawk until he fell asleep sitting up.

Yesterday Rhys had insisted he could skip the meeting and just stay with the two of you. It was a day long battle for a compromise. “Rhysand. We will be fine here with Amren watching over us and Nyx.” Feyre said sternly as Rhys came to tell you he changed his mind about your plans, again.

He shook his head vehemently, “Nope. I need to be here.” You rubbed at the bridge of your nose, squeezing your eyes shut and willing your mate to go away. “What will it take to get you to go to this meeting?” You sighed out.

Feyre perked up, wiggling her fingers, “Oh, I have an idea! What if we come with you. Helion can have a room for us, Cass, Az, and Mor will be there, it’ll be so easy.”

You could tell Rhys was considering it from the pensive look on his face. And he didn’t immediately shut Feyre down.

He nodded, mumbling out ‘I’ll think about it’ before heading back to his office.

You shoot Feyre a knowing look, “You just want those bonbons Helion gets.” “Yes! I’ve been craving them for months. And I want them fresh, not in a box.”

Snuggling up next to your mate on the couch you place a hand on her bump. Feyre does the same to you, resting her forehead against yours. “I don’t blame you,” you giggle out, “I’m happy I get to experience this with you Fey. Even if Rhys is being a mother hen.” She lightly pecked your lips. “Me too y/n/n. I love you”

———

Thankfully Rhys had agreed to you two coming along to the Day Court and you’d spend the night. Winnowing took a lot of energy from you and Feyre, so Rhys was adamant about you two resting as much as possible.

Before leaving you all gave Nyx hugs and kisses. He would stay with Elain and Nesta while you were gone. He hated when you left but enjoyed his time with Aunty Lain.

Winnowing to the Day palace Helion was waiting to greet you. “You’re the first to arrive.” He said cheerfully. The two High Lords shook hands as Helion guided your little group inside. Cassian offered his arm to Feyre while Az offered you his.

“I set up a very comfortable room for you two to relax in. No meeting for you, I’m sure there’s enough stressful things around you these days.” He says, eyeing Rhys. “Thank you Helion.” You say sweetly. “And you got our snack requests?” Feyre asks.

Helion throws his head back, laughing at her blunt question. “Of course I did. You’ll find you are well stocked on any foods your hearts desire.” You and Feyre smile at each other knowing you’re about to have the best snack and relax sesh.

You walked Rhys to the meeting room, like you promised, before leaving him. He takes one of your hands in his, giving you both a loving look. “Do you need anything? What can I do for you before everyone gets here?” “Nothing my love.” Feyre says softly. You bring a hand up to caress his cheek, “We’re just fine baby. You focus, do your thing and help Prythian, yeah?”

He gives you and Feyre a quick kiss before Helion’s personal guard escorts you to your rooms.

Opening the door your senses are overwhelmed by the scent of the sweet treats spread out for you. You and Feyre look at each other licking your lips in excitement. You wasted no time sprawling out on the lounges, digging into whatever was in arms reach.

Hours later Rhys, Cass, Az, and Mor joined you. Rhys was overjoyed to see you two after being separated. “You should’ve seen him when Kal asked where you were. He snarled.” Cassian teases as Rhys nudges his way to sit between you and Feyre. “I did not.”

Mor rushed over to you, lightly placing a hand on each of your bellies. “How are both Mor juniors doing.” You giggle at the blonde, “They have been perfect little angels.”

“No discomfort, extreme fatigue, or -“ “Rhys, we were fine.” Feyre cuts him off. He seems to relax at that. The tension in his shoulders loosening as he bats Mor away so he can feel the babes kick. Rhys lets out a breathy laugh as little feet push against his palms. “Hi angels, did you miss daddy?” Two more kicks in response.

The babes love the sound of Rhys’s voice. Like with Nyx, he talks to them every night. It doesn’t matter if you and Feyre are awake or asleep, he will always make time for the babes.

“Don’t forget,” Azriel speaks up from his spot in an armchair. He’s picking at a bowl of chocolates you hadn’t gotten to yet. “We have dinner in about an hour with everyone.” Rhys wasn’t pleased by the reminder. Something tells you that he was never going to tell you and Feyre about dinner.

Feyre stands, pulling you with her. “We will go get ready then.” She says happily.

You exit the bedroom with a few minutes to spare. Feyre chose a glittering black dress that hung off her shoulders. She decided to leave her crown behind for the night, putting her hair half up with small braids meeting in the middle.

You had decided on a midnight blue dress specked with pearls. The flowing fabric on both your dresses not hiding the fact that you’re pregnant. Rhys eyed the two of with lust sparkling in those iridescent violet irises.

He offers you each an arm to walk down to dinner. Rhys walks at slow pace for the two of you. When Feyre noticed she rolled her eyes and you both pulled him along. When the six of you enter the grand dining room you feel eyes on you. Thankfully not autumn ones. Azriel told you Beron and his court left after the meeting was over. Very typical of Beron to come and complain then leave, making no effort to improve court relations.

Viviane and Thesan shriek in excitement at the sight of you. “Congratulations! How did I not know?” She said excitedly. “When are you due?” Thesan asks immediately after her. The pair continue their onslaught of questions as you answered before the next question came up.

Out of the corner of your eye you could see Tamlin tensing. Clearly unhappy about the topic of conversation. Feyre and Rhys caught on to his unhappiness as well. Feyre tried to change the topic, asking Thesan about how things were going with his lover.

Tamlin and Rhys made uncomfortable eye contact. The males looked like they were about to jump across the table at each other. Rhys pulled your chair closer to him so you’d be away from Tamlin. He was across the table diagonal from you. It’s not like you were that close him but if it made Rhys feel better.

“Do you have something you’d like to say, Tamlin?” Rhys snapped. The High Lord of Spring scoffs, a wicked smirk on his face. “Well I just think it quite odd they’re both pregnant. Why on earth would you want two more.”

Everyone stopped speaking, looking anywhere but at them. Even you and Feyre looked at the table. You could tell she was fuming about Tamlin’s joking tone. “Is that an insult about my son? Or perhaps you’re angry about your situation. If you need to talk about it I’m sure you can find someone who will listen.” Rhys gave him a fake smile and went back to his meal.

Conversation slowly started up again. Tamlin excused himself, only saying goodbye to Helion before stepping out into the hallway to winnow home.

Once back in your rooms for the evening Rhys had you and Feyre cuddled up on either side of him. “Thank you for standing up for our family.” Feyre whispered. “I always will darling. You’re the most important people in the whole world to me.”

You let out a yawn and snuggle close to Rhys. “Let’s get some sleep. This little angel is kicking me for some shut eye.” “This one too.” Feyre yawns out. “Awww, I’m sorry I’m keeping your mommy’s up.” Rhys whispers. He kisses both of your bumps as you drift off.

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acourtofthought · 1 year

Text

THE ERA OF VANSERRA

I'm starting to think the Night Court is setting themselves up for problems by their lack of respect for the Vanserra's 😂

Nesta lifted her chin, smirking at last. “I suppose once we have the Crown in our hands, the Night Court won’t need you after all. Neither will I.” She could have sworn Cassian was repressing a laugh, but she kept her gaze on Eris, who went rigid, rippling with rage. “I do not appreciate being toyed with, Nesta Archeron. My offer was sincere. Stay with the Night Court and you risk your ruin.”

So Cassian said, “I grew up surrounded by monsters. I’ve spent my existence fighting them. And I see you, Eris. You’re not one of them. Not even close. I think you might even be a good male.” Cassian opened the door, turning from Eris’s curled lip. “You’re just too much of a coward to act like one.”

Rhys said at last, “I can stomach being around him.” “I’m sure he’d love to hear that thrilling endorsement.”

“Am I not doing that now?” He arched a brow. “Am I not sending twice-weekly reports to your spymaster?”

Not feeling very festive at all, I said sharply, “That you now feel more comfortable with humans than with the High Fae. If you ask me—” “I’m not.” “It seems like you’ve decided to fall in with two people without homes of their own as well.” Lucien stared at me, long and hard. When he spoke, his voice was rough. “Happy Solstice to you, Feyre.”

But I asked, “And what, exactly, does this Band of Exiles plan to do? Host events? Organize party-planning committees?” Lucien’s metal eye clicked faintly and narrowed. “You can be as much of an asshole as that mate of yours, you know that?”

Mor took another bite from her pastry. “Lucien can’t be entirely trusted anymore.” Cassian started. “What?” “Even with Elain here, he’s become close with Jurian and Vassa. He’s voluntarily living with them these days, and not just as an emissary. As their friend.”

“And?” Cassian bit out. Lucien threw him a withering look. “I’m not your enemy, you know. You can drop the aggressive brute act.” Cassian gave him a grin that didn’t meet his eyes. “Who says it’s an act?” Lucien let out a long sigh. “Very well, then.”

"I'm talking about you, about to kiss Elain, in the middle of the hallway where anyone could see you, including her mate".

"I think Lucien will never be good enough for her"

"I'll defeat him with little effort".

These two brothers are extremely connected and well informed and they've been going out of their way to share information with the NC. And while the NC is occasionally forthcoming and at times decent to Lucien and Eris, there's always an underlying lack of disdain, disrespect or lack of trust the IC has towards them.

Lucien is known as "the fox" and we know Autumn is a cutthroat Court. Is it possible they'll start working together after being put down one too many times by the IC? That they'll make a plan to head to the continent (with Jurian) to free Vassa and deal with Koschei and Beron but will conveniently "forget" to reveal their plans to Rhys and Feyre? Eris has grown increasingly concerned with Berons activities, and I don't think he's all that fond of the IC after they played him at the ball so it might be a natural breaking off point for Eris to begin distance himself and offering up less information.

We know Eris’s (and Lucien's) fire will probably not be a match for Koschei's lake:

"His fire wouldn’t have withstood Koschei’s lake, I don’t think.”

But know he now has a made dagger which he tried to trade for Nesta though Rhys said he might need it yet:

Keep the dagger, though. You might need it.”

And Lucien has Day Court powers. Both things possible weapons against a Death Lord (after first finding the box where he possibly keeps his soul which Elain may be able to lead them too) AND Beron.

There have been hints that Eris would like to make ammends with Lucien:

But as Eris strode by … I could have sworn there was something like sadness—like regret, as he glanced to Lucien.

Or has possibly been in contact with Lucien:

Eris’s face filled with cool amusement. “I wanted to feel out Vassa and Jurian.” He didn’t mention his brother, oddly enough. “But they clearly know little about this.”

I'd actually love to see them reconnecting and working together in Lucien's book. I have no doubt Jurian will remain Lucien's found family but also having his blood brother as found family sets up an even better core group of people for Lucien.

I wonder if the IC will find out their plans to travel through Azriel's spies (without having all the details), then send Elain to travel with them as their own "spy" to see what they're up to using Mor as her cover, claiming they've been unable to reach her.

Feyre winced. “Mor left for Vallahan this morning and is out of our daemati magic’s range.

Elain had squared her shoulders and declared that she was a part of this court—and would do whatever was needed.

"Don't forget that gardening often results in something pretty, but it involves getting one's hands dirty along the way"

Also, SJM has been hinting at revealing the truth between he and Mor since ACOWAR and beyond. Having Lucien, Elain, Eris AND Mor (as well as Jurian and Vassa) all in the continent together makes a lot of sense when tying up loose threads:

“I knew why you did it.” Again that secret smile that had Mor shrinking. Shrinking. “So I gave you your freedom, ending the betrothal in no uncertain terms.”

“And what happened next,” Azriel growled.

“There are few things I regret. That is one of them. But … perhaps one day, now that we are allies, I shall tell you why. What it cost me.”

Eris nodded to where Mor watched them from beside Feyre and Rhys, her face neutral and aloof. “She knows the truth but has never revealed it.” “Why?” “Because she is afraid of it.”

“Give me a damn answer.” Eris crossed his arms, then winced. As if whatever injuries lay beneath his immaculate clothes ached. “You’re not the person I want to explain myself to.” “I doubt Mor will want to listen.” “Maybe not.” Eris shifted on his feet, and grimaced again. “But you and yours have more important things to think about than ancient history. My father is furious that his ally is dead, but he’s not deterred. Koschei remains in play, and Beron might very well be stupid enough to establish an alliance with him, too. I hope that whatever Morrigan is doing in Vallahan will counteract the damage my father will unleash.”

As both Elain and Mor were absent from the crossover scene in CC2, it's another piece of the puzzle that seems to fit.

And while this line doesn't necessarily go with the above, I kind of love thinking about the Elain / Eris interactions we might get:

Nesta barely glanced to Eris, who pulled his assessing gaze from Elain to stare at the eldest Archeron sister with a mix of wariness and intent that set Cassian’s jaw grinding

#elucien #elain archeron #acotar theory #lucien vanserra #eris vanserra #mor acotar #koschei acotar #beron vanserra #elucien book

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a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire · 7 months

Text

Alright, I took a quick nap and Ive decided that I wanna get the UTM reenactment over with as quickly as possible so Im reading chapter 42 and then I'll reward myself with some pain au chocolats and not thinking about this book for the rest of the day and watching the 2002 takarazuka flower troupe production of elisabeth instead. lets go

Chapter 42

here we fucking go with the illyrian wingspan-dicksize correlation, how would Amren even know that isnt she above sex or something. Honestly, I think Cassian would know wayyyyy more about that. on account of all the gay sex hes having i mean. I thought of that joke and then I realized that you could interpret it to mean that he knows about that because hes illyrian and has a dick, but I want to make it very clear that this is a gay sex joke

how come wings are so sensitive that just barely stroking them makes you moan and shudder but you can still fly with them in harsh winds with no issue. My headcanon is that wings arent actually that sensitive, Rhysand and Cassian are just weirdos with a specific kink

This conversation Feyre and Rhys are having about his wings is so weird, its like dirty and yet uncomfortably clinical

oh Rhysand is quicker than death just fucking kill me, im getting so angry again

Syphons are called 'Trichtersteine' ['funnel stones' or 'funnel gems'] in german which is more accurate to how we're actually told they work imo but it sounds pretty lame

Is it just me or is Rhysand being kinda weirdly paranoid rn. I mean granted, they did just get attacked with ash arrows so maybe hes actually doing a good job for once and Im just biased against him

Okay so we finally get some night court fae wearing white, but of course its not for moon symbolism its so they can blend in with the rock of the mountain because this series does nothing but disappoint me

The Hewn City actually sounds really cool, why couldnt this have been the secret city where we spend most of our time, you couldve made it a whole thing about Feyre healing from her trauma UTM through like, exposure therapy or something idk. That wouldve been neat and dramatic, her healing from her UTM trauma in the place that inspired it with the person that inflicted it. I mean, maybe that would be less healthy and even more controversial than Feysand already is but then you could atleast lean into the dark romance of it

I mightve said this already but you knowwww sjm is NOT a painter and consulted ZERO painters because Ive never heard of anyone think about creating art the way feyre does

and Mor is wearing red AGAIN why would you make this a trigger for Feyre just go back and edit it out its not like it matters

God, the description of her outfit is so deeply discomfortingl like it literally is exactly what she wore while she was being drugged assaulted but atleast they left the bodypaint out this time

"[Keir] looked at my face, then my body. I had thought that he would stare and drool greedily but... there was nothing. No emotion. Just ice cold. Shaking internally, - from anger and revulsion - I followed Mor." Im sorry, is she mad that Keir doesnt find her hot????

Theres something uncomfortable about Feyre referring to Rhysand as 'Mor's Lord' especially when we just had a whole paragraph describing her as a proud and empowered queen

"Usually, one Syphon was enough for an Illyrian to to able to steer his urge to kill down the right path." what???

Now shes describing Azriel as dark and beautiful as death and oughhhhhh i knoww im the only who cares about this and its for a pretty stupid reason but I care a lot and it makes me very angry

Feyre referring to a 19 year old Mor as 'barely more than a child' is weirdddddd

of COURSE hes wearing a black tunic for this, I cant believe this is the guy that the fandom has designated the fashion lover when he has two (2) outfits

Feyre describing Rhysand as sooooo powerful and beautiful with a face of nightmares and dreams makes me want to vomit, but more importantly, it makes me yearn to rewatch the 1996 takarazuka star troupe production of Elisabeth with Asaji Saki as Death who unirionically fits all of Feyres descriptors 1000 times better

Not Rhysand using Feyres Cursebreaker title while hes thoroughly humiliating her

Now Feyre is calling him a god, bro youre not gonna be able to have sex if you jack him off this hard hes gonna be all sore

Imagine being a hewn city noble and you all get together because your high lord wants something from you and youre kinda scared because hes the worst, and then you just have to watch him finger some random lady. and you cant leave because then he'll just kill you

I dont like that this is framed as empowering to Feyre, i think its one thing to write a female character who sexualises herself in order to empower herself but the fact that Feyre is doing this at the behest of Rhys automatically renders it non-empowering to me. Like yeah, she obviously consented to this but it wasnt her idea but this was not her idea and this is not something she usually does, the only times shes been sexualized like this is because it was part of some plan that Rhysand came up with

"[Keir] apparently clung to the power. But Rhys was the power." i hate that that sentence made me think of Keir/Rhysand as a ship why am I so goddamn yaoi-brained. And yeah, i know theyre related but according to Rhys himself, he and Mor are only cousins in the most distant sense, so. Man, that would make the IC dynamics so much more fucked up but also so much funnier

Theyre trying so hard to make this hot n sexy but its just so unappealing and dragged out. Granted, sorry if this is TMI, but I did just jerk off so Im all out of horniness for the next little while so maybe I just dont like this because Im not in the mood but idk. theres something so annoying about this, i think its how over-the-top and artificial Rhysands hotness feels, not to mention the fact that he is absolutely not my type

Imagine being Keir rn, just trying to do your job and tell your high lord everything that he needs to know, meanwhile his high lord is sitting in front of him fondling his new sex slave and you just have to keep a straight face. i mean, he sucks ass so i guess he deserves it but man

Presented to you with no further comment: "My breasts became heavy and full, longing, desiring, just like my crotch."

goddamnit, Rhysand just said that he put Feyre on his leash and then Keir made a kinda slutshame-y remark about her clothes and then I thought Rhys was like "maybe I'll put you on a leash too" but it was Feyre who said that. another loss for big gay incest

"He liked this as little as I did" uhhhhh no offense girlie but you actually seem to be having a pretty great time rn

I dont even know what to say about this part where Feyre is like, detaching herself from her thoughts that are calling her a traitor a liar and a whore ?? I think thats whats happening here?? Like, its trying so hard to be sexy but its invoking the imagery of Feyre's (and even Rhysand's) trauma and its just very strange

It took Rhys a fucking eternity to actually touch her pussy

What if Keir developed a voyerism kink because of this. would that be fucked up or what

Its so weird how Feyre thinks about how maybe Rhysand doesnt like sex or being desirable anymore because of amarantha and that certainly sounds like a trauma response he should have but instead it just never matters

"I had been tortured and tormented but my pain was nothing compared to his." YOU DIED

Oh man I cant believe I completely forgot about the absolutely iconic part where Rhysand gets so mad Keir for calling the woman he introduced as a whore a whore that he telepathically breaks his hand about it

what was the point of doing that, Feyre didnt even seem to like it that much

#anti acotar #anti sjm #anti acomaf #anti rhysand #anti feysand #flames and darkness liveblog

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florence-end · 1 year

Note

Could you do one with Rhys and where reader has a small fear of heights? Like he would totally tease her about her fear but also wants to help her get over it because well, her mate is half Illyrian and has wings but she does like to go flying with him.

Yessss, writing for Rhys is so much fun! This one is a bit silly lol

You felt the incessant tugging on the bond that told you Rhysand wanted you to go to him. You sighed deeply, rolled your eyes towards Mor who occupied the twin armchair to yours before the fire, and made your way out onto the balcony to find Rhys, Cassian and Azriel hovering a few feet away from the edge with their beautiful wings beating calmly.

“What are you boys up to?” You grumbled as you passed the threshold of the door.

“Hello darling. We are trying to finish our rematch but we need a referee as Cassian keeps halting play,” Rhys drawled accusingly towards his brother.

“Only because you two keep working together to make me lose, which is cheating!” exclaimed Cassian, throwing the ball at Azriel’s head only for his shadows to swoop up and catch it for him. “And Azriel keeps using his shadows!”

Your rolled your eyes once again. The three Illyrians had been playing this stupid ballgame for centuries, and it still caused endless arguments and rematches every time they played. The purpose of the game was to fly with the ball from one side of the house of wind to the other without losing the ball or dropping too much in altitude. The other two would try to stop the one with the ball, and once they lost possession, whoever took it would take his turn. Usually Amren acted as referee as she was the most impartial but she was hauled up in her apartment with Varian for the weekend and had made very detailed threats against anyone who might disturb them.

“I don’t even know the rules, how am I supposed to referee?” you directed your question to your mate as he landed on the balcony before you and put his arm around your shoulder to guide you closer to the railing.

“It’s easy, you just shout whenever two people team up against the other, or the person with the ball flies too low or too high. Here, I’ll perch you on the railing so you can see properly,” he offered, preparing to scoop you up.

“No! I-I mean I can see from here perfectly fine, I don’t need to be up there,” you protested, backing away from Rhys and raising a hand in front you to maintain some distance between you both.

Rhys frowned, not used to you flinching away from him for any reason. Cassian and Azriel flittered marginally closer as well in an instinctive response to the panic radiating from you.

“My love, what’s wrong?” Rhys asked.

“Nothing, I’ll just referee from here. It’s more sheltered from the wind,” you responded, trying to sound breezy and relaxed. You stepped back towards your mate and gave him a kiss on the cheek before ushering him towards his brothers, but he didn’t budge and continued frowning at you as though trying to solve a difficult puzzle. The silence was broken by Cassian’s sudden loud laugh.

“Don’t tell me the high lady of the night court is scared of heights,” he chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Of course she’s not, she’s been flying with me lots of times,” Rhysand responded on your behalf before looking down at you for confirmation. You just looked sheepishly back at him. “Sweetheart you’re not scared of heights, are you?”

“I’m not scared, I just… prefer to be on the ground,” you defended yourself, much to Cassian and Azriel’s amusement.

“But all those times I took you flying?” Rhys was still looking utterly perplexed by your confession.

“You love it and I love you so I close my eyes and just focus on my breathing. It’s not so bad when you’re holding me but I would really rather not sit on the edge of a railing from which I might fall to my death,” you explained, hoping his feelings weren’t hurt.

“You know one of us would catch you before you’d even made it past the library window,” Azriel pointed out, having elbowed Cassian in an unsubtle hint to stop laughing.

“I know, I didn’t say it was a rational fear. I just don’t like heights,” you shrugged towards the shadowsinger. Unfortunately, while your attention was elsewhere, you missed the silent conversation happening between your mate and the General who was still hovering in midair.

“Please forgive me for this darling.” Before you could register what was happening, or even scream, Rhys had hoisted you into him arms and taken flight. Once there was nothing below you, he dipped you down slightly before launching you into the air. For a split second, there was nothing holding you. Just the chilly wind and the damp air caressed you as you seemed to float for a breath before beginning to plummet towards the earth. In one more half-moment, another set of warm tattooed arms snatched you out of the air and your wild eyes met the grinning face of Cassian.

You were too winded to speak and this time, you barely had time to panic when his arms disappeared from under you and dropped you into the waiting embrace of Azriel ten feet below. This time, you immediately wound your arms tightly round the Illyrian’s neck.

“What the hell?!” You screeched, your face red from the wind and your entire body shaking from adrenaline.

“We’re sorry, we’re sorry! But you can’t be the mate of an Illyrian if you’re scared of heights!” Rhysand apologised, holding out his arms in an attempt to remove you from Azriel’s hold. But you kept your grip tight as you glared at him. “Look at you now though! Eyes open, still alive. Didn’t you enjoy the thrill, even a little bit?”

You took a second to consider what he’d said. You were thousands of feet in the air with only your trust in these three males to stop you from hurtling to your death, and yet you weren’t having a panic attack. You actually felt quite invigorated.

“Fine, maybe a little bit. But only because Azriel is carrying me,” you snarked at Rhys. He pouted jokingly as Azriel laughed quietly in your ear.

“You’d better come back to me my love, or else I’ll get jealous and who knows what I’ll do,” Rhys replied, sending a glimmer of taunting arousal through the bond to make you shiver.

You held you arms out towards your mate but he took just one of your hands and tugged you from Azriel’s grip just as the shadowsinger disappeared from under you. For a moment, Rhys allowed your toes to dangle high above the city as he held you with a firm but casual grasp of your hand. With little effort, he tugged you upward and swept you into his arms once more before returning you both to the balcony where he perched on the railing with you stood between his legs.

“Still scared?” he whispered in your ear, causing goosebumps to rise across your skin.

“No,” you murmured, standing on your tiptoes to ghost your lips against his. “But you’re insane if you think I’ll be your referee after that stunt.” In one quick move, you shoved your mate off the balcony and joined his brothers in delighted laughter at the squeak he let out before his wings began flapping enough to steady him in mid air.

Without another word, you flounced back into the living room to resume your glass of wine with Mor, vaguely aware of Cassian and Azriel scolding Rhys for ruining their chances of a fair game.

#acotar fanfiction #acotar #rhysand #rhysand x reader #rhysand x you

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loveyazy · 5 months

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Hi! So I haven't read acotar (well a little bit but it didn't hook me) but I've been reading your posts about the upcoming book and I'm so curious, I don't know these characters but the second hand gossip is fun and I'm rooting for them lol when does the book come out? when will it be announced who the protagonists are?

JSHDKAKJSD I had written so much on my phone but then I closed all the apps and I lost it so hopefully I can remember most of it still.

The thing is it's OBVIOUS it's going to be Elain. She has even said in this interview x at 25:00. I don't know why people genuinely think GWYN is going to be the next book 🫠. Her purpose was to help Nesta. Outside of that, there is not much left to tell of her story. It's done. TBH, I completely forgot she even existed after I finished reading ACOSF. Like I kept seeing posts about her on my insta discover, and I was like who tf is Gwyn? 💀

Also just... ELAIN IS THE THIRD ARCHERON SISTER. How can it NOT be about her when Feyre had the first three and then Nesta had the fourth? Like it's so painfully obvious. Anyone who thinks otherwise is just delusional.

Even if it's not Elain and it happens to be Mor, it's NOT going to be Gwyn before Elain LMFAO.

But this is why I think it's going to be Elriel and not Elucien.

Firstly, Koschei the Deathless. The story follows Ivan marries his THREE SISTERS to THREE WIZARDS.

Ivan saw his three sisters wed to the first suitors who came across them—wizards in the form of birds.

Hmmm THREE SISTERS. BIRDS >>>> BATS. 👀

Eventually Ivan goes on to defeat Koschei with the help of his sisters and their husbands.

And then we have another Koschei retelling. The FOX and the FIREBIRD. Listen Sarah was not subtle with the names. Vasalisa >> Vassa. Lucien had a fox mask in ACOTAR, making him the obvious fox. You can read more on it here but I'm going to do a quick summary.

A king has a garden that produces one gold apple a day, but it was stolen every night. He promised half his kingdom to whichever son could catch the thief. He has three sons, and they all tried to catch it. The third son saw the firebird and shot at it, and hit the bird in the wing, but it escaped and left behind a golden feather. The king wants the fire bird and promises whoever brings the fire bird alive would get half the kingdom and be the heir. So they all go out to find the Fire Bird, and they all encounter a Red Fox.

The fox approaches each prince, and asks for something to eat, but the first two shoot at it. The third prince shares his food. So the Red Fox takes him to the palace where the fire bird is and tells him how to grab the fire bird by putting it in the wooden cage, not the golden. Well, the prince says how can a lovely bird be in a wooden cage and proceeds to put it back in the golden, but then basically sounds an alarm and he gets arrested. The King tells him to bring him back a golden man.

The fox says he'll help the prince, but of course the prince is a dumbass and goes I'm gonna choose the pretty one instead of the one the fox told me to choose and he gets arrested and this king says bring back Princess Goldilocks from the Golden Palace in the Black Sea.

Anyways it goes on and the third brother is betrayed by his other two, and the fox brings him back to life. In the end he gets the kingdom, the firebird, Goldilocks, etc. The fox is very instrumental in this story.

SPOILERS AHEAD IF YOU HAVEN'T READ ALL OF ACOTAR

We have hints that Lucien and Vassa are very close. They talk to each other. Plus they live together along with Jurian.

Plus if it was going to be Elucien there would be hints that Elain even had romantic feelings for him. Even a little attraction. She doesn't. She literally stares at a boiling tea kettle until he leaves because she doesn't want to spend any time with him.

She wants nothing to do with him. And yes sure she says she doesn't want a male, but remember that she is still dealing with the traumatic events of being forced into the cauldron and being changed.

This though, happens a year later with Azriel...

Imagine seeing this in the most recent book, and thinking they're like siblings. Sounds like the antis have some sort of incesty weird freaky ass sibling relationships. 😬

This also happens in the book, which I believe is during the same time? But Az's was a bonus chapter and this was available to everyone.

Elain is not herself around Lucien. I don't understand how anyone can see their relationship and think that's going to be endgame. This was the most recent book.

Even before ACOSF, Nesta and Cassian had this in the previous book that alluded to their romance.

But there is absolutely nothing to allude to any sort of Elucien romance. Elain wants NOTHING to do with Lucien. And honestly, I don't blame her. Who would? He was a part of the most traumatic thing that ever happened to her.

I'll never understand Elucien shippers. If you like Lucien, why would you ship him with someone who wants nothing to do with him? If you like Elain why would you ship her with someone she wants nothing to do with?

I'm 10000000% convinced the Elucien shippers are just Gwynriels who ship them so they can have their ship justified, but most of their evidence is just their headcanons, and them not being able to read between the lines and interpreting things very wrong.

#pro elriel #anti gwynriel #anti elucien #elriel #pro elain archeron #pro azriel #i tagged these as antis so if you come for me I'm going to ask why the fuck you're here?

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p1nkcanoe · 11 months

Text

the polaroid collection: aether

this is part two of the polaroid collection, based off of 'picture this'. you can either find the masterlist here, read on ao3, or read below:

Swiss had done everything perfectly leading up to this point. His plan to get Aether into his room had gone smoothly. He’d lured him in with the promise of a private show, had given him a great one as he pushed the ghoul down into his desk chair and gave him quite the strip tease, ran his hands over his body so, so slowly, and palmed at his dick until the quintessence ghoul tented his own pants and finally made his move.

He’d allowed the ghoul to crowd him against his bed, let him think he was bigger than he really is, and barely put up a fight when he’d flipped him around with strong hands on his hips and pinned his arms behind his back. Now, Aeth’s got him bent over the edge of the mattress with his legs spread wide, his thick cock stretching his hole impossibly wide and making him grit his teeth with every delicious roll of his hips.

He tries to breathe in and out of his nose to stifle the noises that bubble up in his throat with every thrust. Aether isn’t necessarily big like Mountain or long like Rain, but he is wider and girthier than anyone else or any toy he has in his own personal collection, and taking him is always a process to open up and will his body to adjust to. But despite how much his hole burns with the stretch and his body clenches tight around him and tries desperately to push him out, nobody hits those sensitive areas inside him quite like he does.

“More, Aeth,” he chokes out between thrusts, and Aether hums, giving him a particularly hard thrust that buries himself deep until their thighs are flush and sticky with their sweat.

“That what you want?” He asks and presses the heel of his palms into the hard muscles of Swiss’ back. He hisses with the pressure, a dull burn from the tension he’s been keeping there to distract himself, and his cock kicks from where it’s trapped against the edge of the bed. It feels good. Sore. Swiss shakes his head up and down, tells him it’s exactly what he needs, and groans loud and open mouthed against the sheets when Aether gives him another.

His voice feels like it’s lost in his throat. Trapped behind a barrier that comes with the experience of fucking the quintessence ghoul. He knows that Aether will do everything he can to get it back out of him and make him sing for him. He wants him to force it out.

Aether keeps giving him those deep, powerful thrusts, listening to the pretty, choked noises that escape the ghoul below him with each and every one, and repositions his hands to grab at strong hips and give him better leverage for when he eventually begins to pull him back to meet him. Their skin slaps together and the sounds bounce off of the walls, echoing back into their ears and making them moan. The room is already hot with the low flame in the fireplace, but like this, with both ghouls covered in a thin sheen of sweat and their heads spinning from the other’s scents and pheromones, it’s almost unbearable. Swiss digs into the sheets with his claws and Aether tilts his head back towards the ceiling, mouth ajar and tongue heavy against his bottom teeth. The low groans that fall past his lips make Swiss’ belly flutter.

“Oh?” The quintessence ghoul says suddenly, making Swiss crane his neck backwards to get a look at what he’s suddenly slowed his thrusts for. He’s about to bark at him for it and tell him to get back to what matters at the moment when he follows the line of Aether’s eyes towards his nightstand and his lips press together in silence. The ghoul pets at his sides while he leans over to get a better look. “What’s the camera for?”

“Later,” Swiss grunts out and pushes his hips back to sink down on what had slipped out. He hopes the short answer will be enough to pull his attention away and back to his body, which pulses and flutters hot around him. Even his dick jerks, begging for more stimulation.

To his dismay, Aether leans over further towards the camera and Swiss watches as his brows shoot up towards his hairline and air huffs out of his nose.

“What the fuck is this?” His hand shoots over to grab at the singular photograph that had been tucked under the camera. He brings it to his face and takes a good hard look. The surprised huff that leaves his mouth makes Swiss drop his head to the bed and groan in annoyance. He better keep fucking him after this…

“Oh… Oh, I see,” he says, a knowing smile breaking out across his face as he starts to put the pieces together. He turns the photo around to show the other ghoul as if he hadn’t taken the damn thing before dropping it down on the bed just beside his head.

“Now I understand why you were so apt on getting me in here. Were you gonna take my picture? Get me all nasty like you did with Lus? You could’ve at least given me a heads up so I could’ve done my hair, maybe put on a bit of lipstick or something to look all nice.”

There’s a teasing lilt to his voice that makes Swiss want to turn over and bark at him to shut up, get back to it and fuck him good, but then Aeth starts rolling his hips again in a nice, slow grind and building up to a rhythm that makes him shut his mouth without so much as another word.

Sure, his little plan was discovered, but what’s the worst that could happen? He’ll get his photo one way or another. He won’t let him leave until he does. He drops his head and relishes in the mixture of pleasure and a little bit of pain, humming with every direct punch to his prostate, and then Aether speaks again and Swiss burns hot.

“Well we gotta put on a show, don’t we?”

Swiss doesn’t have time to respond before Aeth starts fucking him again, hard and fast, digging his claws into his sides and pushing him so forcefully into the bed that it scoots inch by inch by inch across the hardwood floors with loud squeaks and terrible noises. The sound of his balls slapping against him is so loud and the sound of his own heavy panting fills his ears until he can’t focus on anything else but his dick in his ass. His tail wraps tightly around the other ghoul’s wrist for some sort of stability. It’s useless, but it makes him feel better anyway.

“Get a hand on yourself, I want you desperate for this picture, baby,” he says, and Swiss doesn’t even have to turn his head to know that he’s smiling, probably licking over his fangs with his tongue like he wants to devour him. Still, he untangles his right hand from the sheets and tries to maneuver it under his body. It’s difficult with the strength of the ghoul pounding into him from behind but eventually he gets it, wrapping his fist around his shaft and jerking downwards towards the floor in a tight grip.

Aether hums, “Yeah, that’s it. Keep that up.”

He feels Aether slow again and cease in his ministrations until it’s only the tip of his cock that stays inside. Swiss follows him with his hips when he threatens to slip out completely and the quintessence ghoul gives him a hard slap on his ass that makes him jolt and gasp out. The print of his hand appears in the form of a silhouette on his skin.

“Let’s see,” Aether hums as he picks up the camera and straightens back up, grasping the clunky thing with both hands and turning it over to get a good look at all of its components and dandelion yellow buttons. “How do I work this thing?”

He presses a button on the side and a light flashes orange. Something about that looks correct and Swiss hears him chuckle. If he were to crane his neck around he’d see the ghoul peering through the viewfinder and focusing in on different parts of his body. His sweaty nape, his broad shoulders, the beautiful muscles of his back, his pretty little ass… He tilts it up and down again, even looks up towards the ceiling for some reason.

“Dunno where to start,” he says, full of excitement like a kid in a candy shop. “Maybe just something quick for when you miss me–”

The ghoul stretches his arms out in front of him and turns the camera around so the lens is facing himself, smiling wide for the flash that goes off and illuminates him in bright, white light. The sound of the camera dispensing a photo makes Swiss groan again, growing increasingly annoyed with the ghoul’s childishness, and Aether chooses to ignore him wholly, pulling the photo from the slot and dropping it down next to Cumulus’ tits.

It’s black, but Aether nods anyway, pointing at the thing, “that’s a keeper, I already know it.”

“I’m glad you think so, now can you fuck my ass like you mean it?”

“What? I didn’t mean it before?”

“Not since you got distracted,” Swiss retorts and turns his head just enough to shoot the ghoul an exasperated look. Aeth sighs dramatically, unphased by his sass, and carefully puts the camera down in a place where it won’t get jostled or accidentally hit by a stray arm or flailing limb, and his hands drop down to pet at Swiss’ sides as he looks down at him in awe.

He loves when the big guy is predictable. It always makes everything so fun.

But what isn’t fun is how Swiss’ arm has stopped moving under him since he took the photo. Seems he wasn’t the only one who was a little distracted…

Aeth tsks, pulls his hips back and thrusts forward so hard that Swiss chokes on his saliva and momentarily loses the strength in his knees. Aeth curls a hand under his hips and pulls him back up, his other hand planting itself in the center of his back, right between his shoulder blades to keep him rooted in place. Not that he was going to go anywhere before…

“If you can’t do it, I guess I'll have to do it for you,” he says, sighing, and adjusts the hand under his hips to wrap around his cock, knocking the other’s useless fist out of the way. Swiss whines and presses his cheek down against messy sheets. He’s already so sensitive.

In any other situation he’d love to have someone jerk him off, but he knows that Aether is not going to be quite as nice as he tries to make it sound. There’s a certain lilt to his voice that makes his stomach twist with something uneasy. Even more so when he begins to twist his wrist around his head where he’s already dripping and so, so wet, and press him down with the weight of his body, fucking him in earnest–each thrust harder than the last.

His orgasm builds faster than it ever has before from being on the edge for so long that his body can’t help but clench and squeeze around him, tight like a vice, and Aether moans with the pressure, leaning more of his weight into his hands and forcing his hips into the other’s.

Swiss is going to be sore for days, but it’ll be more than worth it.

“Stop clenching,” Aether grunts, panting hard with every thrust. “If you don’t loosen up I’m gonna bust soon.”

Swiss tries to do as he’s told but Aether isn’t giving him much grace. If he fucks him any harder or puts any more pressure on his back he’ll surely break him.

Aether starts to get a little sloppy, starts to breathe a little harder through his mouth, and the hand on his dick pulls at him in a way that is hardly pleasurable. It’s lazy. His grip is too hard, then too loose, and back to crushing… When he snakes a hand down to take the job back over again from the other ghoul, he doesn’t put up much of a fight.

It only takes a few more thrusts for Aether to meet his peak when Swiss fails to open up any further and he pulls out to ride out his orgasm against the cleft of his ass, his newly freed hand holding his shaft firmly between his cheeks and the one on his back tangling up into his hair and pulling on a thick fistful of curls as he shoots white ropes over the expanse of Swiss’ lower back. With every tense of the muscles in his stomach he pulls back on Swiss’ hair and making his chest arch up off of the mattress until his spine aches with the strain of it. It feels good–the pain in his back, the sting at his scalp, and the throbbing of his hole as it clenches and flutters around nothing, already mourning his cock. He’s a slut for pain and Aether knows it.

The cum on his back is hot on his skin and the moans from the other ghoul as he gradually comes down makes Swiss go a little insane. He fucks his fist faster, pays special attention to the tip with quick little jerks until his voice gets caught in his throat. His belly burns so hot, just a little more and he’ll bust–

“Say ‘cheese’!” Aether says, a smile thick in his voice as he reaches for the camera and holds it high above his head, angling the lens down towards where his dick rests fat and heavy between his cheeks. He makes sure to smile, proud of the mess he made on the other ghoul, and just to make sure he’s ready for the picture he readjusts his grip on his hair and pulls harder than he has the entire night.

The pull on his hair is so delicious, so unrelenting, and Swiss digs a fang into his lip, a moan ripping from his throat at the same moment he happens to open his eyes and catch his shadow appear for only a millisecond against the sheets. He squeezes his eyes shut, tightens his grip just a little more, and crests over just as the photo ejects from the film slot with a mechanical drone.

“Now that,” Aether says proudly. “That’s the one.”

#aether ghoul #swiss x aether

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harrystylesfan2686 · 9 months

Text

Drunk

Pairing: Elain x Reader

Summary: Two best friends in a room, they might kiss.

A/N: it's been a while Since I wrote anything. Hope you like this. 🫶

Masterlist

○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○

It's been months after Elain and Nesta were thrown into the cauldron and while nesta was ragging and snapping at everyone, Elain had locked herself in her room refusing to talk to anyone. Feyre had tried everything but her sisters refused to give her any time to talk. Then when she finally gave up and asked others in our family to try and speak to them, we had agreed.

Nesta has come around a little finding friends and building a relationship with cassian, no matter it be a hateful one, at least she's listening to him.

Elain has made friends with Nuala and Cerridwen and me. When I tried talking to her at first, I had quickly realized that she didn't avoid me like she everyone.

Well, me and Azriel, but at least she's talking to someone. I often see them talking and walking together. She always has a look on her face that tells me, she's clearing fond of him.

As much as I know it shouldn't bother me. It does.

I had early on realized that I liked being with Elain. At first, I thought nothing of it but after feeling a rush of jealously and hurt while seeing her with Azriel, I knew my feeling were much greater than I realized.

I had developed a crush on her.

The realisation hit me hard. I'd spent the entire day locking myself in my room and pacing around over thinking everything. I didn't tell anyone about it. How could I? The male she is mated to is my friend. And the male she is interested in has been my best friend for as long as I can remember. I joined the inner circle not long after Mor did. I can't betray him.

So now, I steal glances of her when she's distracted, filling myself with fake hope that maybe, just maybe, she does the same to me too.

But I know I'm not true.

She likes azriel and there's nothing I can, or will, do about it except be there for her whenever she needs me and hope that my silly crush fades away with time.

And that's exactly what I'm doing right now.

Nobody is in the River house this evening except I and Elain. Feyre and Rhysand are gone on a date and the others are gods know where. So it's just us.

"I'm told you this was a bad idea." I say aloud, referring to Elain's idea of cracking open one of Rhysands infamous wine bottles and drink ourselves dead.

I turn to look at her, blinking multiple times, trying to clear the dizziness in my head from the moment. I look at her layed over the couch with one hand over her head looking up at the ceiling and the other hanging off to the ground, holding the bottle to the ground.

"El?" I shook her foot from where I'm draped on the could near her feet, half sitting half laying. She removes her hand and arches her neck to see me as she mumbles for the repeat my question.

"What are you thinking about?" I ask instead and turn my head to see her.

"I was thinking," She sighs. "How I've never done something adventurous." She puts her hand down and frowns. Her lower lip jualting out a little.

"What do you mean?" I pivot myself in her direction, supporting my head on a hand on the back rest while the other lightly draws circles on her foot, my brain too distracted to stop me from how good it feels to touch her.

She suddenly sits up. "I mean like intimately. I've never done anyone adventurous that makes me crazy. I have only ever been with one man so I don't know if there is anything that I haven't felt." Her eyes widened as she looks at me trying to get me to understand.

I frown. "I'm not sure where you're getting at, love."

She grunts and a flash of determination crosses her eyes when she looks at me again, probably thinking of how to explain me. "You know I've only ever layed with one man, right? I was just thinking that maybe it's time for me to find someone else, you know. Just have a crazy, passionate night to fuck the frustration out of me."

My eyebrows go up at her words. I don't think I've ever heard her curse before.

"Maybe go to a club and have the first person I think attractive. Weither it be a male or and female I don't care. I just want the rush, that heat, you know?" She touches my face and looks at me with such a desperation that I can't find anything to say in reply.

"I just want to do something I've never done before. Something crazy."

The air shifts around us when I notice her look at my lips.

"Something I'll remember for the rest of my life." Her eyes switch between my eyes and lips while mine are fixated on her tounge swiping over her lower lip.

I force myself to look into her eyes, struck by the desire swirling in them. My breath deepens trying to resist myself from leaning in and catching her lips to mine.

"Kiss me." She whispers.

I close my eyes and force air down my lungs, hoping if I dont see her face I'll be able to control myself.

This isn't true. She's just drunk.

I remind myself as my hands take hers off of my face. I finally open my eyes, regaining control and whisper, "No.".

Her eyes narrow. "Why?" She demands.

I sigh. "I think we've had enough wine. We should go to sleep." I reach for the wine bottle on the ground but she quickly holds it out of my reach. "Elain." My eyes narrow. "Give me the bottle."

"No." She smiles as if this is a simple game. "Come get it." She holds it in front of my face. I sigh.

"Seriously, love, you've had enough." I reach for it again but she pulls it back. She giggles when I grunt. I go the take it again but before I can take it, she twists herself and slams her lips to mine.

I gasp and feels her smirk against my lips. He puts her free hand behind my head to keep me from pulling back and kisses my harder.

I melt under her soft skin.

I loss all my self control and finally kiss her back with full force. She smiles brighter against me and let's go of the bottle to push me against the back rest of the couch. She straddles me holding my head with one hand and my waist with the other.

I whimper when her teeth bite into my lip. She pulls back, still holding my lower lip, I moan as she watchs it bounce back in place when letting go. The sound only making her kiss me harder.

The heat of the kiss only intensifies as we run our hands over the others body.

My one hand hugs her waist, crushing her chest against mine, while the other palms her ass through her silky dress. She let's out a sound so beautiful, i want to trap it in a jar and listen to it forever. Her one hand on my jaw, moving my mouth with hers as she pleases while the other tangled in my hair, pulling just enough to make me moan again.

I rip my moth from her, trailing it down her neck. Bitting and sucking, leaving a trail of red along her skin. She whimpers and my brain turns into mush. Thinking nothing but how to make her never stop making these sound. She pulls my head again to kiss me with everything she has.

But when she moves a little, a sound of glass cracking fills the house. And just like that our bubble of heat pops.

We freeze. I pull back to see her hodded eyes looking up at me with desire. My own eyes widen when I notice the bruises on her neck. Did I do that?

"Why'd you stop?" She sweet voice ecos in the silence. "Keep kissing me." She whines.

I take a deep breath and put my forehead to her. I look into her eyes as I say the most hardest words I ever had to say, "We can't."

She goes to protest again but I shut her down saying, "You're drunk. You aren't thinking straight. You're just needy and think this is a good idea. But it's not. I'm not a good idea. I'm so sorry, love. You have no idea how much I want to kiss you and bury my head in those soft and amazing thighs but I can't because you'll regret it. You'll regret me in the morning. I can't afford to lose you."

"I would never regret you. I want you." She looks into my eyes.

"Alright. We can continue this if you still think that in the morning when you aren't under any influence. Okay?" I try to convince her.

She whispers a little alright and sighs. "But please, at least let me hold you." She wraps her arms around my waist and rests her head between my neck and shoulder.

And I do as she said. I hold her until she falls asleep and carry to her bed when I know she's deep in slumber. When I lay her on her bed and turn to leave, I feel her fingers around my wrist, begging me to stay. So I do.

I lay on the other side of the bed and pull her back to my chest, keeping an arm wrapped around her waist. I put my leg over hers and bury my face in her neck. Holding her impossibly tight and willing my heart to survive when she regrets everything we did tomorrow.

○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

#acotar #acotar fandom #acotar fanfiction #acotar fluff #acotar x reader #elain archeron #elain acotar #elain x reader #elain x yn #elain fanfic #elain fanfiction #making out

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emilyondemand · 2 years

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Something I find a little interesting about some in the fandom is how literal things need to be spelled out. I think this could be a bit of a case of not understanding the difference when an author shows us something(good writing) and tells us something(mediocre writing, except where exposition is needed, obviously). This is especially important in relationship dynamics, and I think this can be applied to Az’s bonus pov as well as to his and Elaine’s relationship as a whole.

SJM has been peeling back layer after layer showing us the depth of feeling and tenderness between Az and Elain through their actions toward one another.

Elain noticing Az rubbing his temples and getting him something to alleviate his discomfort

Az making a joke at Amren’s expense to distract everyone from Elain’s embarrassment

Az staying up with El after 3 am to listen to her gardening plans

Az acknowledging Elain’s contributions and service to her court and family through her domestic duties and not letting anyone eat until she is seated as a sign or respect

Az respecting Elain’s privacy with Lucien

When Azriel hears about the fight between Nesta and Elain, he doesn’t wonder about the fight, he is worried about Elain’s well-being. “What happened to Elain”

Azriel’s shadows coiling like snakes to defend Elain when she’s insulted.

So a common argument is that we were in Azriel’s head and he did not think about Elain in any other terms outside of her beauty and having sex with her. That even in Cassian’s bonus he thought about Nesta as a “pillar of steel and flame,” but I feel like this again comes down to that pesky little thing that antis love to hate, context. And even in context, this remark from Cassian isn’t much different than Azriel thinking about how open and hopeful and trusting Elain is when she looks at him.

Cassian and Nesta, at the point of time of his pov, had only seen each other a couple times. Nesta was still human, Cassian didn’t understand why he was drawn to her, they each had a very visceral reaction to one another that manifested itself by walking a very thin line between love/hate (and very often fell into hate territory). This encounter happened before he made a vow to protect Nes, which in text seemed mildly out of place, but was illuminated by their interaction in his bonus pov.

The bonus gives context for Cas’s actions in that moment. Just like all of the moments Elain and Az have had over the course of four books give context to Az’s bonus.

Azriel and Elain find themselves in a private romantic situation. One that Az has been simultaneously trying to avoid, but also hoping for desperately. The author is expecting her readers to understand by this point in the story that there is an established bond between the two, so there is no need for Azriel to wax poetic on Elain’s virtues, he knows what they are. Because, as opposed to Cassian and Nesta in Cassian’s bonus, Azriel and Elain have spent over 2 years moving in the same circle and getting to know one another. SJM is noting the familiarity that has occurred between them when she has Azriel remarking on:

Not needing his shadows to read Elain

Elain understanding why he was avoiding the river house and his motivations- indicating that these two have gotten to know each other well enough to communicate without words

Moments unseen to the reader involving mutual flirting with lingering glances and the brushing of fingers

And Elain making a sex joke with Azriel shows that these two are obviously comfortable with one another, especially in light of Elain’s reaction to Feyre’s attempt to discuss Fae periods with her

Ironically enough, antis also conveniently forget that between the two POV’s, it’s Cassian who is concerned about how Mor will feel about him and Nesta; Azriel on the other hand, doesn’t spare a thought for Mor while he is with Elain.

Then we get to the confrontation between Azriel and Rhys. Antis seem to think that Azriel is going to just start pouring out his heart to Rhys, and the truth is, he kind of does in his own way. I think it’s also important to note that Azriel’s rage here had less to do with Rhys interrupting, than it did with Azriel knowing Elain was confused and hurt and he was forced to be the cause of it.

So then we have Azriel:

Willing to upset the tentative peace in Prythian for Elain

Willing to fight a blood duel for Elain

Prioritizing Elain’s wants over the entitlement of the mating bond

Questioning Fate and the Mother

And his feelings need to be spelled out more than that? In a bonus chapter the majority of readers don’t even know about?

SJM shows us over and over in the bonus that there is a deep and intimate connection between Azriel and Elain, and it is mutual. The lengths Azriel would be willing to go for Elain and her well being says loud and clear that his feelings for her aren’t purely sexually driven. The cliche: actions speak louder than words, personifies their relationship.

#this is 100% a rebuttal to some dumb shit a delucien posted a few weeks ago #😬😬😬#selective reading is a plague on this fandom #especially for the azriel antis #elriel #pro elriel

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purplespacekitty · 4 months

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Magnifying Glass: "The Outcast"

Episode: "The Outcast"

Series: Star Trek: The Next Generation

Season 5, Episode 17

Original Air Date: March 16, 1992

Screenwriter: Jeri Taylor

Director: Robert Scheerer

I feel like Star Trek as a fandom doesn’t really talk about this episode enough. I find this episode extremely fascinating and have a lot of thoughts about it, but I don’t want to subject anyone who isn’t willing to my (VERY LONG) ramblings, so please, keep reading at your own discretion.

First, a quick synopsis: an alien planet called J'naii enlists the Enterprise-D to help them find a lost shuttlecraft in their star system. First Officer Commander Riker is paired up with Soren, a member of the J'naii, to devise a rescue mission for this shuttlecraft and along the way, the two catch romantic feelings for one another. However, the J'naii are a majority androgynous, aromantic and asexual race and those who deviate from this norm are persecuted and forced to undergo a kind of conversion therapy to "cure" their "condition". Soren confides in Riker her feelings towards him and her identity as a woman, things she could not share with her own people for fear of the violence she has seen others like her face. Understanding the risks, the two pursue a relationship with one another, but eventually the other J'naii find out and Soren is put on trial, where she makes an impassioned speech to stand up for herself and others like her. After the trial, Riker tries to fight for Soren's right to seek asylum with the Federation, but his support and efforts are in vain. Unfortunately, by the end of the episode, Soren has been subjected to psychological treatment and no longer feels any attraction to Riker. The Enterprise leaves, having finished their business with the J'naii and Riker is left to pick up the pieces of his broken heart.

I could go on and on about the "bury your gays"/"queer and trans people must suffer" trope this episode and others like it within the franchise fall into (i.e. DS9's "Rejoined" and ENT's "Cogenitor"). And while I will be criticizing the casting and writing decisions this episode's creators made, I think it's important to recognize the ways in which this episode does achieve some level of success with Star Trek's most favored format for addressing social and political issues; allegorical storytelling. However, I will be dragging this episode before I compliment it, so bear with me.

I’ll be honest…I’m not super jazzed about the way they handled sexuality in this episode. The J’naii reproduce asexually and it is not socially acceptable to have sex or procreate sexually in J’naii society. Which is in an of itself mostly fine, except that the writers portray the agender, aromantic and asexual J’naii as largely dispassionate, cold and close-minded, unable to connect with each other or other beings in meaningful ways which, hey, as an aroace person, that hurts to see. The J’naii are supposed to be an antithesis of (‘90s) Earth conventions of gender and sexuality, but in their creation as one of the very few sets of characters up until this point that are generally androgynous, aromantic and asexual, they fall in line with a kind of alienation not uncommon in Star Trek: ‘look at this species, they do things differently from the majority of humans! isn’t that neat? but it’s just unique to them, so what sets us apart from them must be what makes us fundamentally human’. Take Spock, Data, Seven of Nine and Odo for instance, all characters who on some level struggle with human/humanoid conceptions of sexuality and all characters who have a complicated relationship to humanity as they themselves are not (just) human. Each of them are generally received by human characters as cold and calculating and to have difficulty connecting with others intimately because they are not (just) human. The often-used trope is that if only they were human, they would understand what love is (queue Foreigner’s “I Wanna Know What Love Is”). This more broadly implies that romance and sex are essential to humanity and human intimacy, which they are not. Creating a species that predominantly operates in this cold and stagnant way creates a monolith of aromantic and asexual people and ignores the complexities of the aromantic and asexual spectrums when we really don’t get much explicit representation beyond this episode in the franchise.

Riker's actor Jonathan Frakes insisted that it would have been more impactful to cast Soren with a male actor rather than a cisgender actress. Indeed, because this episode was made specifically to challenge viewer attitudes towards homosexuality, such a decision surely would have shaken people’s foundations a bit more and would have actually better-achieved what the writers were going for. Maybe this episode would have been as beloved as “Rejoined” if it had featured Star Trek’s first kiss between two men; after all, Soren identifying as a woman still presents us with a male/female romance like all of Riker’s canonical romances. However, if they had had Soren still identify as a woman when played by a male actor, we would still have someone who does not live our stories telling our stories for us. A truly meaningful representation of trans people would have seen Soren cast with a trans actress. But as I mentioned, an allegory for trans people wasn’t really what the writers were going for and they probably didn’t see hiring actual trans people as a viable option in the first place. If you look on Memory Alpha, you will see that none of the writers in the room for “The Outcast” were trans or queer themselves. Jeri Taylor herself says that while she is not gay, she wanted to do this story because homosexuality is such a controversial issue and "as a woman [she does] consider [herself] in a particular minority; [she knows] what it feels like to be disenfranchised – not in that precise way – and [she] felt like [she] had a touchstone to some of the feelings that must be involved" (Captains' Logs: The Unauthorized Complete Trek Voyages, p. 240). I think it's admirable that she wanted to head a project like this and to give the issue a great deal more compassion than others would have in her place, but the fact still remains that she herself is not gay or trans, meaning that, again, people who do not live our stories and were mostly just fishing for clout were trying to tell our stories for us.

All this to say, I do think this episode has some things going for it that I would like to outline below. Because regardless of the casting decisions and the way the writers actually ended up handling conventions of gender and sexuality, functionally, Soren is a trans woman: she identifies as a gender different from the gender she was assigned at birth. And Riker falls for her and gives her his love with an open ease that Soren’s own people do not.

When I watched “The Outcast” for the first time, I hadn’t come out yet and I hadn’t even begun to delve into the world of my own gender or sexuality. So it wasn’t my trans awakening or anything, but it certainly is one of the things I ruminate on when I think back to, as we LGBTQIA+ people are wont to do, all the times when perhaps I could have realized it.

Yeah, I know this episode gives us just another of many Riker romances, but it is not at all flippant or without depth in the way it unfolds. The focal romance of this episode is part of what makes it all the more heartbreaking. Riker falls fast and hard for Soren in an era of American TV where trans characters were routinely played for laughs (I’m looking at you, Frasier). Popular cis male characters of the 1990s are vastly insecure about their masculinity and sexuality in interactions with trans people, particularly with trans women. If TNG teaches us nothing else, it certainly teaches us that Riker is admirably comfortable in both his masculinity and sexuality. Of course, Star Trek takes place lightyears ahead of the eras it’s filmed in. This episode was written in the 1990s and is therefore restrained in its exploration of gender by mainstream, Western ‘90s understandings of gender. But by the 24th century, humanity is supposed to have addressed and healed the wounds of its prejudices. So by the time the Enterprise sidles up to J’naii, humanity has had plenty of time to learn about and understand the multitudes of gender, not just in their own cultures but in those of other species (I’m thinking here of Star Trek’s tendency to favor Western cultural values over others). There are no mentions in this episode of the many genders that have been recognized by various Earth cultures throughout history and the writers did not anticipate the way in which gender identities and definitions have now been recovered and expanded, a process one might assume will only continue as we move forward.

"The Outcast" aired in 1992, when the term “nonbinary” had not yet made its way into mainstream English vernacular. But as pointed out above, it is not unaccompanied by other episodes in the franchise addressing gender politics: “The Offspring” showcases Data’s relationship to gender and his determination to let his android child decide their own gender; DS9 has an entire character whose gender and sexuality are fluid depending on their host and the symbiont Dax’s gender is never confirmed; the wormhole Prophets’ genders are never confirmed; there are many episodes in both TNG and DS9 which examine Ferengi gender politics; one episode shows us Sisko and Bashir excitedly discussing a male lieutenant’s pregnancy and upcoming baby shower; etc. However, while it's easy to argue that it would have been plausible for the human officers aboard Enterprise-D to easily grasp the concept of a species where androgyny is the norm, it is precisely the incongruity of a mainstream Western '90s understanding of gender paired with the supposed utopian Earth of the 24th century that makes this episode resonate with me (as I'm sure it has with others) in particular. Science fiction is more about the past than the future, after all. “The Outcast” approaches genderqueerness and pronouns with the compassion and curiosity expected of Starfleet. And because of this, we get to see multiple characters grow in this episode, particularly Riker and Worf, both of whom initially struggle with the idea of gender neutrality.

Now, getting into the romantic plot. Riker’s love for Soren is unconditional, a hopeful light in the face of two different worlds (Earth from our side of the screen and J’naii from the other) that constantly deny trans people our right to exist, which paint us as sick, demented, perverted, monstrous and disgusting. When Soren confides in Riker about her identity, he is not deterred. He is curious and kind, glad to have been shown this part of her truth, even as he struggles to understand J’naii’s general attitude towards gender. Furthermore, there are no reservations on Riker’s part about Soren’s appearance. Although Soren is played by a cisgender actress, binarism in our society pressures many trans people to transition medically in a way that Soren has not, an issue that is of no concern to Riker who is simply in love with her as she is. Which is cool, considering that the majority of Riker’s romantic interests are hyper-feminine. What this shows us is that Riker is not so shallow as to be concerned solely with a person’s appearance when it comes to who he's attracted to and does not so deeply equate gender presentation with gender identity that he is unable to see Soren as the woman she is. He is already attracted to Soren before she confides her gender identity to him.

Soren does not mention anyone who has felt similar feelings for her or for whom she has felt similar feelings and explains that the concept of gender is highly “offensive” to the J’naii. She has spent the majority of her life in fear of her truth being exposed, but in Riker’s company, feels safe to share it with him as he is an outsider who has shown an honest interest in learning. He comes to understand her in a way that she has not been allowed to let others understand her before, in a way that has not been safe before, which is the door that opens them both to their care and love for one another. Though we don’t get to see them learn all that much about each other personally, they do learn that they share an interest in exobotany and get to spent some truly heart-melting moments together.

Back on the Enterprise, Riker has a significant conversation with Deanna about Soren, expressing his deep love for her and letting Deanna know that he wants to continue to pursue a relationship with Soren. Again, this demonstrates that Riker is not only head over heels for Soren but also that he is secure in his masculinity and sexuality, nowhere near ashamed of the feelings he feels for Soren, but simply concerned for the stability of his friendship with his ex. We love a respectful, communicative guy.

We don’t get to see Soren express her feelings for Riker or any potential shame she might harbor about them to anyone but him, which we know would lead to her persecution if she tried to share it with another J’naii. Which leads us to the end of this episode.

The tragedy, of course, is that the other J’naii do find out and do not respond with compassion or respect. Even after Soren has given everything to valiantly make her case, to stand up for herself and others who share her experiences of gender oppression, Riker and Worf return to J’naii one last time to rescue her only to find out that they are too late; Soren has already been forced to undergo psychotectic treatment (i.e. conversion therapy). Riker makes one last desperate attempt to get Soren to recall her true self but…she doesn’t. She can’t. And that clipped connection, that final tear in the string that bound them together in an inextricable truth, is what haunts Riker as Ensign Gates takes the Enterprise-D out of J’naii’s orbit.

Obviously, I would have loved to see Riker and Worf succeed in their rescue attempt, have our intrepid heroes break the Prime Directive to save Soren and liberate the trans people of J’naii. Unfortunately, for this episode to work, for it to resonate with its viewers as a meaningful commentary on the way our society treats queer and trans people, the screenwriters obviously felt that the tragedy of losing Soren in the end would garner more sympathy. We see a similar take with episodes like DS9's aforementioned “Rejoined”, where Jadzia Dax’s resolve to live the rest of her life with Lenara Kahn is ultimately in vain. She can only watch helplessly from the balcony above the Promenade as Kahn leaves, having chosen instead to favor the life of her symbiont and its future hosts over spending what time she can with the love of her life. Homophobia and transphobia literally tear people apart - real, living, breathing, loving, caring people. To deny someone their right to stand in their own truth is to deny them their existence. The screenwriters for “The Outcast” made the conscious decision to have us witness this violence, to make us sit with it and understand that Soren represents the real experiences of real people. That the violence committed against queer and trans people harms both them and those who love them. Because Soren was loved. Is loved. She was held and shown a humility she for so long had no access to. And for a brief moment, she felt that love.

Absolutely, this episode could have been done better and I really, really wish they had hired actual trans people to tell Soren’s story or at least cast an actual trans actress to play her. But I do think there is something to be said for the episode’s fundamental, albeit accidental message which is that trans people are not broken or sick in the head. We are whole, vibrant beings entirely deserving of love, respect, support, happiness, care and, above all, life.

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