#dont ask for someone to be honest and then cry when they're honest

[weebsinstash]

Since you guys have been digging poly yandere LuciLili do yall wanna hear one of my more fucked up ideas

I keep thinking about scenarios where Lilith is emotionally intelligent enough to kinda, get a read on who you are pretty quickly and, maybe you even help out by being a bit too honest about yourself, and she falls in love with you first and decides almost on his behalf that you would be perfect for Lucifer as well. Like I'm talking this man may know barely more about you than your name but Lilith sees certain similarities or contrasts between you that she's like, INSANELY POSITIVE you two would be perfect together, and she may be totally right, but the ethically dubious part is when Lucifer isssssss not quite as fast to warm up to you and Lilith tries to... expedite that process

I've thought of, the idea i mentioned before with you being pulled into a kind of dream dimension where you're bonding with them in a pseudo-Eden, that maybe Lilith "invites you" into their dream without telling or asking Lucifer first, and then it's in Eden where he falls in love with you, since, you're acting more like your actual true self since you think it's a dream with no consequences. In the waking world, you're nervous, barely making eye contact, maybe even a little scared of him, but in Eden, it's "do you two have nicknames for each other? Like do you ever call each other things like, maybe Lucifer is Lulu or Luci or Ducky and Lilith would be Lili or-- also when you two first met, Lucifer, were you ALSO completely naked or did you accidentally teach her what clothes were and made her self conscious? Since Lilith was naked when you met her, was it hard not to stare at her p--" like, you have so many interests and all this curiosity and they both think it's so cute and once you start talking, you speak in paragraphs not sentences and they just pofe watching you get excited and interested about things

but picture it gets to the point where here's Lucifer, "ok Lili OK I like her alright?! But it's- she's not really ready for a relationship let alone a BABY right now" and Lilith is just pouting and crossing her arms and BANISHES HIM TO THE COUCH. IM SERIOUS. Kicks him out of his own fucking bed and tells him he should be in yours instead. "Well just MAYBE she would be ready for a relationship if she had someone to show her she was safe and cared for LUCIFER >:( don't pretend you haven't been wanting another child LUCIFER >:( don't make me get her pregnant myself LUCIFER >:(" and also she very very well COULD do that so it IS a credible threat

Like Charlie is getting so fucking worried her parents are bickering all the time and she's worried they're gonna get divorced and it's just like, THEM ARGUING OVER GETTING YOU PREGNANT OR NOT. Lilith is over here privately having conversations with you where you're breaking down about dying before you could get a partner and get married and have a wedding and have a baby and she's running back to Lucifer, "cmon Lulu... don't you want to know what your baby would look like? She's just so SAD, Lulu, she wants her baby and her family SoooOoooo badly. You mean you don't want Charlie to have another sibling? You dont want a little baby to put in a little duckie onesie?"

I just. Picture. Lilith inviting you and Lucifer to drink with her and she just. Drugs you both, completely unapologetically slips you both aphrodisiacs. Gets you Hella Hella Drunk and, at some point later in the night, Lucifer thinks he's having sex with his wife, but uh, not wife number 1, that's for sure. He doesn't snap out of it until either the next morning or when he's already, you know, finishing, and you're just slurring and clinging to him like a teddy bear and honestly probably already pregnant

LATER ON DOWN THE LINE AFTER YOU'VE HAD YOUR BABY, you break down crying to Lucifer, "I want to tell you something but I'm worried you'll be mad but I- I don't want my baby to grow up with a lie and get hurt in the future, and, and you're a really good person and a good husband and a good dad and I hate lying to you" AND YOU REVEAL YOU WERE IN ON THE DRUGGING THING THE WHOLE TIME. LILITH APPROACHED YOU AND TALKED YOU INTO IT. But Lucifer still doesn't blame you because you're absolutely perfect in his eyes and, now you two have a beautiful little baby and you're both so so happy together, and here's Lucifer, "hey honey? I'm gonna go talk to Lili for a lil while, ok? Be back later ^^"

Skip to like a month later, here's Lucifer looking quite smug, "big news everyone! Lilith is pregnant! We've got another Morningstar on the way!" and here's Lilith ALSO looking quite smug cause, awwww that's so cute, he thinks he got back at her, but really, she got everything she wanted in the end. Lucifer just puffing out his chest because he's got a new baby and another on the way and Lilith just smirking coyly as she continues to knit little baby socks. If they'll go to your baby or hers or, maybe another future baby of yours, now, who can really say? Honestly the happiest Morningstar is Charlie because now she has her dad, her mom, and her other new mom, and now her new siblings too! And if anything bad ever happened to you or your baby the entirety of the Hotel will go to war for you with unspeakable unspeakable violence :)

[sankttealeaf]

dumping my modern au durgetash ideas down here because i made rue + gortash in the sims earlier and now i cant stop thinking about them causing chaos. this is so stupid

(under the cut for ease)

rue is a nepo baby, social media influencer with a very devout following. the cult of bhaal is very much a cult disguised as a commune and she promotes it like, all the time.

gortash - notable politician, honestly not a huge depart from canon if im being honest. shady, sleazy, sooo handsome (he's paid me to say that)

he hires her as his social media manager for his upcoming campaign. she's then 'fired' because it's leaked that they were hooking up and it got a little messy. (they were caught fucking in his office and rue threatened to kill the person who walked in on them.)

rue posts on sock accounts about being against gortash's policies only because she finds it funny at how angry he gets (he asks her to find out who's behind the tweets. she never does)

she still promotes his campaign, like, a lot. people wonder if she's being paid to do so and shes like "you could call it that ;)". stirs up more drama for him and his pr team to dig him out of. she's blocked from interacting his official accounts because she was just telling everyone about how his game is "kind of cringe" but "man, is he hung!" and how "everyone should vote for him so he can buy me this sword i really want" (she knows his account passwords and unblocks herself, dont worry) (gortash thinks this is hilarious. his name is trending every other day because of her)

their breakup is MESSY. rue goes on hour long livestreams 'crying' and gaining sympathy from her followers and starts a smear campaign against gortash one day because she was bored. gortash is seen in public with other notable influencers because he's "moved on" and "is taking the break up well, unlike some people" (he's not. texts her frequently. even emailed her on his professional account. that was another pr disaster when the emails were leaked (by rue))

more scandals occur when they're seen together again and media outlets are going feral over what's happening. people are so involved. are you team rue or team gortash? (or team who cares, backed by orin) rue tweets from gortash's account saying how he's going to donate so much money to the "commune" she runs and business begins to boom for her on that front.

rue has a public breakdown over orin leaking so much information about her that ruins her reputation overnight. she disappears for like, a good few months and comes back online with a total rebrand.

she's now dating notable professor + academic author gale dekarios for some reason? she seems happy. people are confused. a lot of comments keep asking about gortash so she does a live stream "answering the people's questions" and is painfully honest about everything. another pr disaster for gortash who somehow got into office and is now dealing with the fallout from rue airing out all their secrets online. it's a mess.

someone asks her if she would ever get with gortash again and she says for ten thousand gold. gortash paypals her the money immediately with "do it coward". she announces her engagement to gale the next day (bought a ring with that money thanks gort x)

anyway hello if you read this thanks for indulging me i'm rotating them around in my brain as we speak.

[nogenderbee]

Heyhey its 💫anon again!! :DD

I've read the fic you did for my previous request AND IT WAS ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE (a great first thing to see in the morning truthfully)

I know i just recently wrote a request but im here to leave another one simply because i had an idea that im afraid im gonna forget soon and also while your requests are still open yknow i hope thats okay

Basically Tsukasa x gn/reader (yes again he is my biggest comfort character alright) where the reader is often worried about being too annoying or too loud often and needs lots of like reassurance yknow and Tsukasa is just there to tell them its alright that they're not annoying and that he is there for them iykwim (bonus for physical affection, i am an absolute sucker for physical affection in these fics hehe). Oh also fic format if thats okay :p

Again tysm for the previous request and no rush take all the time you need and dont pressure yourself byee have a nice day/night!!^^

Hello! Happy to see you again and don't worry, I'm happy that you want to request ^^ And to be honest my love language is physical touch so you ask and I shall deliver hehe

Tsukasa comforting loud!reader

Tag List: @alicewinterway18 - come get your future star!

You always were energetic and loud sound everyone you knew. And your boyfriend was the same kind of person! So of course he never minded your energetic nature. But you couldn't supply stop thinking otherwise...

What is he was just pretending to like you? What if he hated you for being so loud? Was your relationship all out of pity?

Those and many other thought were on your mind when you wealth for Tsukasa at school roof so you can enjoy your lunch break with him. You didn't even realized when tears started falling from your eyes...

"My star! In really sorry for being late. One of my teachers stopped me on the way here and-"

Your boyfriend immediately stopped and you knew he saw your state but still decided to mask it as well as you could.

"Oh, hi Tsukasa! Don't worry, I know how teachers are! So what they wanted from you?"

"My star... were you crying? What made you feel so down?"

He sat next to you slowly rubbing your back with one hand and holding your hand with another. He was patiently waiting for you to speak and tell him what was troubling you, so of course you gave you up because he's so adorable and told him.

"It's just... let me ask you something it will be easier like that. We're you ever bothered by how loud I am?"

In that moment he was stunned. Did he ever made you feel like that? He couldn't help but move hand that was rubbing your back to your shoulder, so now he's gently hugging you.

"Of course not! I love that about you in fact! What made you feel otherwise?"

"I... was just thinking a lot recently..."

"Hey, my star. It's alright if you don't want to tell me everything about it. Just remember that I love every single part of you! And if someone ever would tell you that you're too loud, then know they're completely wrong!"

And so the two of you spent your lunch break hugging each other and talking. He didn't forced you to open immediately up but after some time you started being your usual loud self that he adored so much. Maybe you even forgot the reason he started hugging you in the first place?

❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉

[5tr4ylov35t4y]

Dont get over me, Im here

pairing: chan x fem!reader genre: angst in the start,fluff,smut

warning: sadness, clingy chan, SEX...... sweet affirmations reader is scared of thunder

notes:my first real fan fic that i haven't deleted, havent checked my grammar

It's been a week since Chan and I broke up.He has been too busy to be with me, so i started feel lonely and depressed. i couldn't handle it so i broke up with him thinking it was for the better. But damn, do I miss those eyes of his. They used to hold so much adoration for me, but now they're just filled with sadness during his lives that I still watch to help me sleep. I didn't even realize how much he was doing for me until he was gone. He would always be up before me, leaving me a note to start my day with a smile, and he would come to bed after me because he was working on his new track. I miss our happy comforting dinners that we had once in awhile. Now I'm just eating dinner in silence.

For Chan, it was not doing him any good either. The bed would be cold, the apartment would always feel too empty… what was he supposed to do when all his jokes didn't make sense to other people because his other half was not there to laugh? Why did it have to happen so suddenly? Would it not have been easier, fairer for them to both fall out of love at the same time? (At least he thought you fell out of love.) That wasn't how it worked, of course, that would have been far too easy. For it to be mutual and comfortable. Chan had been hurt immeasurably. He did not argue and merely agreed that if y/n was not happy, then it would be best for them to end their relationship. But this was the end he thought, and it fucking hurt. He couldn't cooperate with life as well as he did when you were still together. He never went to sleep now, no matter how hard he did. He would reach over for you, but it was empty.

He didn’t get around to dropping your things off until the next weekend and you hadn’t messaged him asking what the hold up was, he likely didn’t dare The last thing you needed was to sound like his ex nagging him about shit.It was Saturday night, 9pm by the time Chan got away from work and it was pouring with rain. The typical cliche weather for dropping off personal items to someone who broke your heart, The boxes were going to be left on the porch and Chan was going to ring the doorbell and then bail. He wasn’t going to hang around hoping you would talk to him begging him to come inside because the weather was getting harsher.

Chan sat parked outside y/n's place with the engine off listening to the rain splattering hard on the roof of the car. he forced himself out of the car lugging a box through the torrential rain towards the white door. Setting the box down under the porch roof,A rumble of thunder growled above before a flash of lightning lit up the street, just as chan ringed the door bell the light died and the power failed. "fuck," chan said pushing back his hair he knocked on the door and went back to his car trying to start it but it didnt turn on.

chan went back to the door and knocked on the door His knock was near drowned out by the rain and thunder, but he pounded the door until it shook and just when he thought it was better to give up the door swung open and y/n threw herself into chan's arms, her face buried in his shoulder. crying as she said "chan im so scared please stay with me" his heart broke even more, he picked y/n up and walked in closing the door behind them. chan walked to y/n's room with her in his arms the bed was all messy and the sheets were tangled but he still sat on the bed while cuddling y/n when he spoke “I’ll be honest, I thought you already had someone else here with you.” Sure it might have upset y/n for chan to admit such a thing but it would, at least, take her mind off the storm. “I always knew you were one hundred per cent honest with me so I don’t know why I figured you were leaving me for someone else. You’d have told me if you were, I know that.” chan honestly told you

“I love you, chan. I can’t switch that off, I made the decision to leave because I was so lonely. I missed being with you, I missed us being together.” you told him Without thinking, chan leaned down and kissed you softly.“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I made you miserable. I’m sorry that it’s too late to realise it and fix it. I’ll stay until the storm is over and I promise you won’t hear from me again.” chan softly said into your hair “channnnn-, you’re so stupid. I love you so much.” you said right before you assaulted chan with kisses pressed all over his cheeks and forehead until chan had dissolved into laughter and you were just lying against him with your head in the crook of chan's shoulder.

While everything seemed to be genuinely perfect at that moment, chan still needed to know what was going on because it felt the same way as it had when they first got together.

Unfortunately, his question went unasked as the storm, which had seemed to calm for a moment, picked up with renewed energy and the rain battered the windows, the glass rattling from the force and y/n tensed in his arms.

“Stay, stay with me until the storm blows over.”

“Then what?”

“Stay until the next one.”

“What if the next one never comes?”

“Then you can never leave.”

“Okay.”

chan started to leave kisses on your face as his hand went to your hip" are we back together/" he asked softly 'there has to be some ground rules first chan"

His glossy eyes stared into yours. His eyes were filled with hope. “yes love tell me."

Placing your hand on top of his, you began to speak.

“You need to come home every night. You can’t continue to be at work 24/7. You’re already exhausted and you’re just hurting yourself. I’d also like to see you. I don’t want to keep coming home to an empty house.”

Chan nodded, the ghost of a smile could be seen on his lips.

“H-how about…” He began to say.

“Hm, what is it?” You asked.

“How about I try to make up a little for the time I missed out with you tonight?”

You looked at him with curious eyes, “Yeah, and how are you going to do that?” A smile was heard in your voice.

Chan showed you what he meant the moment his hands began to slide down the waistline of your pants. He looked at you with big eyes.

“I know it’s not much but I want to do something at least. If it’s ok with you, of course.”

Rotating your neck, you leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek. “I would love that.”

With your permission, Chan slid off your joggers, followed by your panties. He grabbed them and tossed them near the foot of the bed.

You spread your legs open wider to give him better access. His warm hand traveled down your mound. You always melted at his very touch. His touch was safe and warm. Each time he touched you it sent shivers down your spine.

Dipping his fingers past your slit, he sought out your clit. Placing a gentle touch onto it, he began to move his finger causing you to whine.

“Does it feel alright baby?” He asked as he continued to tease your sensitive bud.

Softly squirming, you responded in a breathy tone, “Mm it’s so nice Channie. F-feels good.”

“Good.” He breathed out in relief. All he wanted to do was pleasure you, to make you feel his love from his touch. He softly attached his mouth to your neck as he continued to play with you. Starting from your earlobe, he began peppering soft kisses down your neck. He could hear the soft breaths you let out at every kiss. Chan continued to plant kisses slowly down your shoulder.

“Whatever my baby wants.” He stuck a second finger into you causing you to mewl.

“Fucking love your fingers Channie! They’re so t-thick.”

Moving his fingers, he began to fuck them in and out of you, “Yeah baby? You like my fingers?”

“Mhm!” you nodded, your head already going hazy.

“You’re just sucking them in, aren’t you?” He said, teasing you.

“Yes!” You cried out.

“Good girl.”

Chan simultaneously fucked his fingers in you as he sucked on your neck. His touch felt amazing, absolutely loving that all his attention was on you and making you feel good.

“Chan.” You breathed out, “I’m almost there!”

“Mm, come on baby, come for me.”

You let go the moment you heard his words, keening as he fucked you through your orgasm. Your muscles clenched as you split all over his fingers.

“You did so good.” Chan whispered into your ear as you fell onto the pillow.

Laying down beside you, you were both face to face with each other. Chan looked at you, smiling at your sleepy expression.

“I love you so much.” Chan said as he raked his fingers through your hair once.

“I love you too Channie.” You whispered out before you fell to sleep.

Chan stared at you for a bit, he admired how beautiful you were. He was so lucky to be loved by someone like you. you have no idea just how much he's head over heels for you. It's like he's under your spell or something.

[cheolhub]

NO CAUSE IM SUCH A SUCKER FOR WHEN THEY'RE MEAN

but imagine the aftermath, like you would not know how to fucking act after that and it throws you off your game and he wins the next race and !!!

you're so mad. you're so angry he got to your head that much. and he's so fucking smug about it. but of course, it can only go one way at this point, and at the end of the day you end up in his bed again bc what else are you even supposed to do?

AND HE'D BE SO MEAN ABT IT, all "can't believe you're here begging for my cock again. shouldn't you be out training? or are you just that much of a cockhungry slut?"

and it continues like that. it doesn't even matter who wins or who loses anymore, bc the outcome is the same anyways - you crying on his cock, you on your knees for him, you taking whatever he wants to give you. and you know that if this came out it could ruin your career, but you just can't stop.

(okay but spinning off of that earlier ask. what if you're in a crash, maybe it's one if the last races of the season, and he's THE FIRST ONE THERE bc holy shit he got so worried. like he always worries when someone crashes bc this shit is dangerous, but it's different now, and he doesn't quite want to think about what it means yet. (he's a little less mean the next time, not bc he's gotten soft or anything, he swears)) - ☁️

UR SUCH A FUCKING MENACE LIKE IM GONNA RIP MY HAIR OUT. it’s 1 am so that means this is going to be hot shit (the bad kind 😹) ok but seriously if i dont make sense or it reads bad, im so sorry, ive written like 4k words today and my brains fuzzy

wonwoo is so cruel. he’s so fucking cruel. he’s insulting you while fucking you stupid, rambling on and on about how you’re always crawling back into his bed like a shameless loser. about how you have no self-respect whatsoever. about how you should be out training even though you’re going to lose again. and again. and again.

and you’re just taking it because, fuck him, but he makes you feel so good. he bullies his cock into you and makes you cum countless times and it’s just too fucking good. you’re in this toxic… relationship? would you even call it that? you’re in this toxic situationship and you have no idea how to get out of it… or if you even want out of it.

and, cloudnon, you’re 100% right. it doesn’t matter who wins or loses.

if he wins, he’s fucking you as if he were some type of god with the cockiest smirk on his face. if you wanna cum, you have to beg and tell him how much of a loser you are. (woah humiliation kink popped out again my bad)

if you win, he’d be so fucking pissed. so so angry and he’s taking it out on you, immediately adjusting that cocky attitude of yours. makes you cum over and over till your just in tears babbling his name and incoherent pleas.

no matter what, he’s always going to have you begging for more bc you’re just his a pretty, cockhungry slut.

[oh my god i alrdy know that didnt make any fucking sense, BUT WAIT BC UR LIL SPIN OFF THING IS KINDA CUTE ☺️ ill start with a poorly written post-crash bed scene]

you’re fine. you’ve told him several times, but he keeps asking and it’s starting to get on your nerves. but, like, it’s also starting to freak you out a bit. he hasn’t said anything mean to you and the way he handles you is kind of… soft? something you’re not used to at all when you’re under him like this

he’s still a bit freaked out if he’s being honest. you could’ve been really hurt… and it’s morbid… but you could’ve fucking died and he doesnt think he’d be able to stand it if anything really bad happened to you.

he has no idea what he’s feeling right now. he doesn’t want to know. god forbid he have a crush on the his top competitor and god forbid you don’t feel the same way.

you grow impatient with his gentle touches bc you’re dying to have him manhandle you like he usually does, so you sigh out. “wonwoo, told you i’m fine. just a few cuts and bruises. stop worrying so much. you won’t break me.”

he looks at you nervously and your heart squeezes a bit… he’s kinda cute when he’s not being a complete dick. “you sure?”

“i’m sure.”

“i’ll be nicer today,” he mutters, “y’know, since you obviously don’t know how to ride.”

there he is.

you smirk, “oh? why don’t you show me how then?”

he smirks, voice low when he says, “it’d be my pleasure.”

[pompadourpink]

Hi! I feel hopeless. I just dont get along with my family

So here's the thing. I wanted to study abroad. They cried and accused me of being selfish. So i studied for our national uni exam ( +8 hours a day for all the year) . I almost lost my mind. I lost my mental well being. I was at home all the year. Now i became successful. But my life is a hell still. I want to spend my summer holiday here in our home. They wanna go to country ( where there is nothing for me to do,no friends, not even a mall) they wanna do garden stuff. And my mum cries and tells me she wants to spend time with me. So i accept staying there for one fucking month even though i dont want to. They always accuse me things that make me hate myself. They pushed me through this academic way, i was found gifted. They made me take all these tests, they said i shouldnt study abroad or study hard. My dad is angry that i want to take a prep year in uni ( which everyone takes here) like wtf. We just dont get along. I dont understand them at all and to be honest im too mentally tired to cope with them. I almost lost my mind this year, i think i deserve a break seriously. What should i do? They always cry and blame me and then i do what they want. All my life. But im still bad. And still selfish.

Hello dear,

I first want to ask you this: if it was anyone else in the world, would you allow them to treat you this way? Would you allow a teacher, classmate, neighbour, to tell you what to do, torment you, and make you miserable? Just because someone shares DNA with you doesn't mean they get permission to treat you like garbage and get away with it. Parents owe unconditional love, not kids.

It's not about you. Bullies do what they do because they hurt and have not healed - what you are is a coping mechanism, a punching ball, an easy target. You could objectively be a parent's wet dream and it wouldn't fix the way they treat you, because they're not trying to make you better, they're trying to make themselves feel good. Remember that South Park episode where Kyle's dad, a miserable man turned online bully, inadvertently drives a woman to sui(ide and is flabbergasted that she did it because he never saw it as a possibility, never thought about her feelings. There's nothing in the world you can do to make things better because if it wasn't you, it would be someone else, and if you didn't want to leave, they'd find something else to bother you about. When someone wants a reason to be mad, they'll always manage to find one. It can get better only if they decide to go to therapy and start getting better - which they might never do. This is not your fault and you do not deserve any of it.

Regarding your studies, go and don't look back. You will feel guilty, sure, because you've been raised to have a sense of duty towards family and absolutely no spine, but you already do, so at least you'll feel guilty while finally doing what you want, what you won't have another opportunity to do, what will get you closer to your goals - and you will be by yourself, free of negative energy, able to start healing and realise how good and strong you are. "I shouldn't have done it" is a crappy feeling but "Shit, I should have done it" is even worse.

What should you do? One, find another support system. Sadly, you will not get a change of behaviour, apology, or the unconditional love you've been craving from them. Find other people you can trust. Stop sharing your plans, goals or thoughts with them: you're not going to make them feel bad and change, you're just handing them new ways to hurt you. Stop putting your hand in the lion's mouth and wondering why you're bleeding. Become a grey rock. Two, find yourself. Go through your beliefs, traditions, principles, and wonder what actually fits the person you are; look for would you rather questions online, watch a lot of movies, read a lot of books, travel, meet people, find out what's inside, underneath all of that pain. Three, rebrand. Treat yourself like your own young child. If your eight-year-old had forgotten to do the dishes, would you call them names and ground them? No, you would say that's okay baby, you didn't do anything wrong, let's put a little music on and do them now together.

Also, check out the malks tag and look for relationship advice - someone who has been abused as a kid will get a very unhealthy, transactional idea of love and is likely to get into abusive relationships (with a romantic partner or a friend), and you have enough to heal from already. Protect yourself.

I would obviously encourage you to get a therapist. If you can't, feel free to reach out, there are a few books and websites I can send you.

Much love,

Mum

[castieltrash1]

Hi tati! It's Gen! First off, have a valentine:

Anywho: I shall be greedy and ask for a ship for Marvel and the breakfast club, with a guy please! I'm 5'2 with short brown hair (I feel like if I tell you how I describe my hair I'm a pick me girl but I'm gonna tell you: cola colored. Because it's brown with a red tint like the last drops of coke in a coke bottle, and brown eyes, and as I call them: Clark Kent glasses. They're big and dumb, but I need them to see though.

I absolutely despise the cold, and I adore bagels. I do enjoy reading (wish I could do it more though) and I'm writing again! I like learning about mostly-forgotten history because someone gets to remember the people who aren't remembered. Plus sometimes people do dumb stuff and I get a laugh out of it. I'm trying very hard to listen to everyone so they can have someone, it's only fair. People deserve to be heard.

And also they deserve 100 dollars, if I were rich I'd give everyone on earth except for the super bad people 100 dollars, then I'd cycle back and give everyone another 100 dollars. That is my literal dream. I really like to find the good in everything. Athletic? Almost entirely not but I have upper arm strength from building a shed. I miss when I did ballet though. I really also enjoy baking! And listening to music. I also enjoy sweaters. They're beautiful and soft and warm. So nice. I should probably sleep more but I've got a million ideas and only so much writing ability. A little note before I finish typing: I've literally been inexperienced in any type of romance. It's never happened for me. Okay thanks I'm nervous now! Sorry for going on a tangent!

Happy Valentine's day! I love you, you're amazing, thanks for being you! Have a good day :)

gen, u and the other anon are godsends for waiting 7 months for me to answer this pls ily <3 also the running theme of these boys is so funny teehee

(THIS IS A SHIP ASK FROM VDAY SO PLS DONT SEND ME THESE LOL)

for marvel, i ship you with...

peter parker!

let’s be honest, you two are perfect for each other. some may say you’re too similar but you shouldn’t listen to them - you and peter are made to be together! first of all, you guys make an adorable couple - especially when peter wears his edith sunglasses and you both rock the frames. when the both of you aren’t just being two absolute cuties, you’re most likely rambling about some cute topic that no one else would bother talking about: “no, if a dog wore pants, it’d be on all four legs!” etc. you’re also constantly doing work for others - walking an old lady across the street, cooing at a crying baby in the grocery store, helping a fellow student with their flunking grade; you name it, you and peter are there teaming up and solving the day! he’s not very experienced with romance either, so while it may take a while for him to admit he’s crushing on you, your mutual pining style friendship will develop into a heart-warming relationship eventually! then you can share sweaters, listen to music, and giggle while peter attempts an arabesque. he swore he could do it, so he will!

for the breakfast club, i ship you with...

brian johnson!

AGAIN, you guys are meant to be and i will take 0 criticism <3 we’ll be honest and say you met while dramatically failing at gym, bonding quickly over your shared hatred for the class. then, you’re complimenting one of brian’s sweaters and it just snowballs from there! you can’t blame him for falling so quickly - it’s not every day a nerd like him gets attention from a cute girl like you! plus, you enjoy learning things, don’t have a boyfriend (or ex), and you’re the kindest person at school! fellow students have grown used to seeing you guys whisper amongst each other in the library during lunch, brian rambling over a new math formula he learned while you excitedly tell him about the obscure historical event you’re researching for a paper. he’s also super touchy once you guys are official and loves lying in the park with you and listening to music and then dancing in the grass (and kissing. a lot of kissing.)

bonus!!!! for dead poet's society, i ship you with...

steven meeks!

listen, i have 0 clue how to do characterization for dps bc i only watched it recently and there are No Girls basically so ??? but all i can say is steven is in love with you and would make you a radio and call you his swan queen or some other cheesy ballet-referencing pet name.

[221b-bitch-st]

you know how one person can ruin your mood so fast

without even trying

just thinking about them

an impending conversation, the next time you'll see them

a notification from them

you cant avoid it, you have to answer you have to pick up you have to go

go

go

go

GO

you wish you could go away

away from the places where they always are

away from the people who ask about them

away from the people who know them

but theres no getting away

only time can save you from them

time

time time time

i wish i had more time

i wish i had less time

there's so much to do in so little time

but the faster the days go, the closer i am to getting away

away from them

maybe one day i'll regret leaving

i'll regret not working harder to fix our relationship

i'll think i overreacted, that they weren't hurting me

because im just a child

i don't know whats right

but

i do know what's wrong

and whats wrong is how i was treated

whats wrong is how they made me feel

every. single. day.

when i was with them, away from them, sleeping, awake, smiling, laughing, crying

everything they did dampened my mood

everything they thought about me was wrong

all the expectations were too high

i cant be what you want me to be

i cant be you

i can only be me

but who is me?

ive never had the chance to get to know me

not with them hovering over my shoulder

watching me

pushing me

shoving me

swallowing me whole

who i am is just flesh squished into a box with their name written all over it

but thats not me

maybe who i am right now

but not me

i will never be the person they want me to be

not out of spite or resentment

but just because i dont think that's who i will become

i dont have much experience with myself but i have faith

faith that no matter who i become, they will be ME

not someone who's stuffed in a box

not someone who's pulled in a million different directions at once

not someone who fears disappointment so much that she does whatever she can to be who they want her to be

not someone lashes out when her buttons are pushed

but someone who is kind

someone who empathizes with the pain of others because she has been there

someone who does things because she wants to

someone who makes choices because it feels right

i will be honest with myself and the people i love

if someday, they're included in that

if they can love themself

if they can respect others

if they can respect me

then

then and only then

will they be invited in

but for now i crawl back into my box

my box with their name all over it

my box with medals for things i wish i hadn't done and sticky notes of things i wish i didn't have to do

and i sit

and i wait

and i cry.

[threepointseven]

Hhhhhhh I don't know if req is open butttt can you do a hc or scenario of Childe, Diluc, and Kazuha where they're holding a crying reader while comforting them because of family issue till readers cry themselves to sleep with their face buried into them? I can't handle pure angst It's ok if you can't do it I generally love your works-

This is also my first time requesting so it took a lot of my courage and to ask this I also practiced

🌺summary!🌺- your parents said some majorly hurtful words, but you always have your lovely boyfriend to hug you to sleep while you cry on him.

Type- scenario 🍄+HC’s 🌷

Flowers included!🌼= Kazuha x gn! Reader, childe x gn! Reader, diluc x gn! Reader

Note🍀= HEOOOO IM SORRTY THIS TOOK SO LONG OB EM GEE. I HAVENT BEEN ONLINE LATELY IM SO SORRYY☹️☹️☹️☹️💪💪

Genshin masterlist

💐Your bouquet has been delivered <3💐

Kazuha

- Kazuha was literally so chipper and excited to meet your parents, the people who brought you into the world!

- He even brought gifts and such as you walked to your parents house with a slight gloom in your step. He didnt know why but you seemed scared almost. He wasnt sure what you were scared of but he intertwined your hand with his to try and settle down the fear.

- The meeting with your parents wasnt exactly what the poor samurai expected. At first everything was normal, he gave the gifts greeted them and made small talk. The peacefulness didnt last too long as theyre opinions about you started getting more insulting as the night progressed.

“Oh thank you dearly for dealing with Y/N! You know how they are~!” Your mother was especially sour to you the whole night. “Ah.. i dont get what you mean..?” “Oh kazuha you know! Theyre all irresponsible and lazy, and dont even get me talking on how utterly pathetic her life is to be honest!”

Your boyfriend was stunned at the casual statement, your mom laughing it off as you looked down to your feet. A clear displeasure in your eyes. “Ah theyre got that right, really y/n how did you manage to snatch a samurai? Cmon tell me! What did ya bribe him with?” Your father was no better from your mom, laughing at those hurtful jokes as you whispered a firm ‘stop..’

“Well i dont see y/n like that… im inlove with them they didnt bribe me.. and their life isnt pathetic..! Theyre a hard worker and i love every bit of them..” you could see the blush on Kazuha’s face as he attempted to defend you.

“You dont need to lie like that! I mean y/n isnt exactly someone you call datable.. just look at them! Theyve always been kind of a waste of space from when they were little yknow?” The insult ended off with a small chuckle from your mom. Your thin string of patience broke as you stood up and raced out of the house, taking your belongings and walking out with small tear drops in your eyes

- after that whole scene kazuha quickly raced to take his belongings and following you, not without giving your parents a harsh glare of course.

- He brought you home while he attempted to wipe away your flowing tears, staying quiet till you got home.

- The moment you stepped foot inside that house he was all over you, repeating “dont listen to them darling your amazing!” like a mantra. Kissing your face and wiping all those tears away. He was cuddling up to you the entire time, not allowing you to escape until he could make sure any type of negative thoughts of you were gone.

- Forehead kisses? Literally everywhere. Cuddling? Already are. Need snacks? Hes getting some right now. He hates seeing you so sad because of your parents! The people he was sure he would love since well they raised you! His beloved, but they were monsters.

- But dont you worry your pretty little head, kazuha is here to kiss your skin and whisper praises in your ears till you fall asleep with his arms cradling you.

Childe

- Family is everything to Ajax. And that includes you of course. Your family to him and he couldnt wait to meet your family!

- A normal day of tiring fatui work turned tragic real soon when he walked into your shared room to be greeted with your sobbing figure, staining the bed sheets with your tears as you tremble.

- He quickly races over to you, immediately cradling you and pulling you onto his lap while he tries to squeeze what happened out of you.

“Hey baby… shh shh… cmon sweetheart what happened hm..?” The auburn haired man cooed as he caressed his cheeks, your head buried in his chest while his legs cradle you.

Your tears stain his shirt as he rubs your back, your voice box unable to make any sounds except a few sniffles and pants. He wanted to get the reason for your tears out of you. Either it be an issue involving your job or a person. If a person was giving you trouble he’d be quick to sort it out but what came out of your mouth wasnt something he exactly expected.

“‘M sorry, ‘m sorry.. its just that—“ your sentence was cut off by a sob, your boyfriend quickly cooing you to calm down. “Do you need some water baby—?” “No… its just me and my parents had a big fight today.. i havent seen them in a while.. and i guess i didn’t expect it to escalate so fast and lucky me..! It ended with them shouting that they wish i was never born..”

The words that came out of your mouth stunned him. It left him frozen, shocked for a moment before biting his tongue in fury and pushing your head into his chest, rubbing your head as he placed kisses on your forehead. “Hah… im so pathetic.. ive seen so many people complain about their parents saying this without a single tear in their eyes and here i am—“

“Oh you have every right to be mad or angry. What horrid excuse for parents would say that to their own child..?!” Slow silent tears rolled down your cheeks as he kept you close, your boyfriend complaining about your parents on your behalf. You couldnt help it. As each sour word about how terrible your parents are your head kept repeating that scene.

“Oh honey… shh.. hey.. it’ll be alright.. we dont need to visit your parents if you dont want to. We can cut them off, or maybe i’ll confront them. Dont let their words get to you baby.” The harbinger settled you down as those tears started flowing again, your face being given a hoard of loving kisses.

- As you calmed down he quickly went to fetch a bottle of water and your favorite snack, feeding it to you as you tried to wipe off the tears.

- He ended up babying you the entire day. Even insisting on carrying you. He’d kiss your face to sleep and mutter praises for handling those hurtful words so strongly. Brushing his hands through your hair as he tried to lighten up the mood by making jabs at your parents.

- He’s always wanted to visits your parents, the people who raised his future spouse but after seeing what theyre like he’d just stay away from them. Your smile is what matters to him and if they take it away and replace it with sobs than he’d rather cut them off.

Diluc

- He had to witness it himself. Your parents shouting at your face as all you could do was stay frozen with tears brimming at the edge of his eyes. He didnt even know how it got to this point, you said your parents were going to visit you for a short while and what he saw, instead of warm hugs and laughs he saw your parents stomping over to you with eyes of malice.

- He couldnt moved, his tongue bitten as he had to let the scene sink in. Your mother shouting at your face as your father pointed straight at you with those eyes of pure murder.

- He tried to hold back, he really did but he couldnt. Your father raised his hand at you, his palm seconds away from hitting your face before your boyfriend stepped in and gripped the wrist of your father tight, the pure strength leading his hand to go limp.

- Your father protested as your mom stood still, feeling threatened by Diluc.

“Y-your the man thats dating y/n huh-! Dont be fooled boy theyre a mess—!” Your dad was stammering as he tried to escape dilucs grasp. Your boyfriend let go of the hand, his eyes still cold and unsettling as he took ahold of your hand softly and dragged you out of the area

“Leave us alone. I dont need your blessing to date them and nor do i need your opinion on them if its a pure lie.”

- he dragged you back to your shared home, tears still drying as he pulled on your wrist. The moment you got into the house he cupped your cheeks and placed a soft, longing kiss on your lips. A beautiful one that wasnt too deep but wasnt too light. The comfort made tears flow out once more, maybe from the flashback or your happiness but either way diluc panicked. He wa stammering “sorry”s for dragging you so suddenly as he intertwined his hand with your and tried to lead you to couch

- Your tears flowed like a waterfall when you sat your head on his lap, he panicked but kept his expression blank. Patting your head and kissing your forehead as you let out everything, tears falling into your mouth while your hand clung to dilucs shirt.

- His lips on each inch of your face as you vented to him. His hand was itching to give your parents a taste of their own medicine but he knew you would like that so instead he promised to give them a Tiny tiny warning the next day…

- He pat your head to sleep as your mind went off about how much you loved him for taking care of you like this.

- He couldnt care less how much tears are on his favorite shirt at this point. As long as your back to smiling he is too.

[undertale-writing-times]

okay so um, this is my first time doing this so i hope i dont mess up (if uncomfortable then pls ignore, i dont mind.)

so my cat just passed and i have been feeling down lately. so i wonder how would ut bros and the bad sanses (is that a word?) comfort their s/o if they lost a pet or a loved one and how would they help their s/o to move on. how would they get through each day, yknow anything with grief (feel free to add your own or take away sanses if you want or change something idk, i dont mind :)

i said it once and ill say it twice please if you feel uncomfortable or dont understand what i have written (to be honest i dont understand what i have written myself) then please ignore this, i dont mind.

unimportant but my cat lived to 15 and he helped me through alot, he was my guardian angel when i was little and still is.

your posts always cheer me up and i hope you have a wonderful morning/day/evening/night <3

Hey, don't even worry about it man. I understand why you're nervous to send this ask, but there's no need to be ^^

Thank you for giving this ask, and I'm so happy to hear that you like my posts! It makes me happy that it'll cheer you up, and hopefully this works well for you.

Sans- Sans understands that losing someone you've been with hurts. He had to go through it a lot with his brother and friends all dying over and over again. Of course, with that, he sort of... started to get used to it? In a weird way. Yes, losing them still hurt, though whenever it happened, he started to feel it less and less. He still gets mad! As one would expect, you know? Even with that, he doesn't ever never feel anything for it, he's scared the moment that happens, he's going to go dark on others. He was scared of turning into Dusty or... Killer. Or one of the other bad versions of him. When you came to him, telling him that your cat died of 15 years died, he's going to try to react to your stuff like how he reacts to his own things sometimes. He made some light jokes to see how you'd react, and if it was bad, he would change his tactics. He doesn't want you to be mad at him or anything obviously! He wants you to feel better, to be happy, he never does well with people who are sad. So, if that doesn't work, he's going to sit with you and hold you as you cry, and he'd ask some questions and ask for stories of your cat to see you talk about them. He tells you that it might be upsetting now, and for a long time, but... it's going to be good to remember all of those stories. While you're upset and sad, he'll help out around the house more than he did before even though he himself also has depression, one of the reasons why he never did much, and he'll make sure to check your soul every so often since he didn't want to have any chance of your soul cracking because of your sadness. He'll tell you that your cat is still with you, just not in person anymore, but they're always going to be there for you, just like he is, because they both love you. 

Papyrus- Papyrus will undeniably be the one that reacts to it more. What?! They died? He's so sorry! He'll make sure that you're okay, asking questions to see if you are and if you aren't, he's going to make sure that you will be! He cares about you so much, and now that they're gone, he's going to be here for you an extra 500%! Rest assured, if there's anything he can do to make you feel better, he's going to do it because he knows how much pets normally mean to others. He never really had one himself yet knows that they normally mean a lot. Plus 15 years! That's a long time for humans, that's a long time for him too even though he's a lot older than 15. If there's anything that you need from him, or need him to do, just tell him and he'll do it right then! He doesn't care what else he was doing. Of course that doesn't mean he's going to be the perfect one for it, he would try to get you out of the house to work out with him because that's how he deals with stuff when he's sad. It's a good way to get your mind off things and to work through your sadness! If you don't want to do it like that, you're going to have to tell him that that isn't how you deal with your emotions, or he'll keep trying to tell you to stop being lazy! It's just something that you're both going to have to work with. Luckily, he's going to do a lot of the stuff around the house for you while you're sad, and that's something nice to do. It'll keep him distracted which is good because if it didn't, he would keep asking you over and over if you're okay and what he could do to help and if there's nothing that he can do, he'll feel like a bad datemate. 

Axe- Axe is one of the few that don't quite understand why you're sad about your cat dying at first. It was just an animal. You could get another one, couldn't you? If you explain that the cat was very special to you and how you couldn't get one just like them, he'll slowly start to understand. He lost a lot of stuff when he was underground; his brother died so many times, and he couldn't stop that. He feels bad for making it seem like that cat was nothing but an animal though, with all of the stuff that they've been through, they don't really have pets anymore. They even had to get rid of sprinkles because they couldn't share their food. He would ask you for stories of your cat just to hear what they did for you over the years, and it makes him feel pretty damn good, he'll admit. They've helped you with so many things; they sounded like an amazing animal. If you ever get sad about it, he has no idea exactly what to do to help you out, and will... most likely, just give you food, because that's what he wants whenever he's upset about something. Food makes him happy. Do... you want another cat? If you get upset at him for asking that, he'll get a little mad himself and say that he's trying his best! Later, he realizes that he didn't do the best, and goes back to try to make you feel better. He would do whatever you ask him to do for the time being, though he would already do that for you since you're his datemate and he loves you. 

Cross- Even though Cross has never had a pet like that before, he does understand the fear and sadness of losing people. Even if it's just another animal, it isn't JUST another animal to you, it was someone and something that you cared about, and he gets that. He would ask you if you wanted to talk to him about your cat, about all of the things that you two went through together, or really anything! If you want to talk, he'd listen, because you're his datemate and he loves you so much. You've helped him through so much without knowing about it, just being yourself, so he wants to help you through something like this. He's honestly one of the best people for this, cause he really does understand what it's like losing people he lost his whole damn world, and now he has his new world... that's you. If, you know, losing your cat makes you feel so sad then he's going to listen, and he isn't going to judge you for your sadness because everyone reacts to things differently. One of the things that he finds cute though is just how sad you did get because... that meant you really cared about them and that's nice. Plus 15 years! That's such a long time!

Error- Error has never had something that he cared about dying, as he was the one that killed many things in the past. He cared for nothing and had nothing... until you came around. He knew your cat, he liked your cat, then they were suddenly gone and you were sad. He would help you out the best that he could, though no hugs please, he's still not used to touching and he won't know exactly what to do. If you want to talk about your cat, he would listen to you talk and ramble and tell you about things that he used to enjoy. He likes to make his dolls, and they mean a lot to him, and sometimes they get messed up. It isn't the same at all, yet he's trying his best to show that he cares about you and your sadness, he just isn't very good at that sorta stuff. 

Nightmare- He could sense the negativity coming off you in waves, which made him a little shocked but also confused. What was wrong with you? Ugh, you're crying? Why? What's wrong? When you tell him, he would tell you to get over it and stop crying then he would leave. Later he realizes that you weren't in the room with him, and he could still sense the fact that you had negative energy coming off you and he sighs, heading over to check on you. Why were you so upset? If it was still the reason from before, he would ask you, what was so important about them that you're still so damn upset? You've had that cat for 15 years, they've helped you through a lot of stuff, so of course you would be upset by it! Now you seem to be getting mad at him but he just... doesn't understand, why would you be so upset about losing someone? He doesn't understand, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't care. If he sees that it really does upset you, he'll sit and listen and talk to you about your pet and he'll like to hear as many stories of them as you remember or want to share. He might not quite understand your sadness but that doesn't mean he wants to make it less there and less important. Humans are weird and their emotions are strong, more so than monsters, so your negativity is a little nice for him but you're also his datemate so he worries about you even if it doesn't quite look like it. Whenever you start to cry, he'll grab a blanket wrapping it around you with his tentacles or offer you a tissue. It isn't much, coming from him though, it really is. 

[hwangsies]

zephyr

(n) a gentle breeze

pairing: seo changbin x female reader (hwang hyunjin x female reader)

genre: rebound to fwb to dumbasses to lovers(?), college!au, undergroundrappers!3racha

warnings: angst: mentions of infidelity, heartbreak and abuse, seemingly unrequited love, they are both so dumb and prideful its annoying, fluff, bad attempt at comedy, minsung on the side, cursing, alcohol consumption, smut: protected piv, oral (f), studio sex, praise, mild degradation, hair pulling, mild spanking

wc: 10k

enjoy <3

-

September

"y/n?" you hear your roommates faint voice calling out your name.

You dont bother to answer because you know she's going to come into your room at any second now.

And you're right. "y/n??" Your door opens a few seconds later.

You groan in response, not looking up and instead staying in your little cocoon of blankets.

"no babygirl what are you doing?" you feel the bed shift under lias weight when she sits down.

"what does it look like i'm doing?" you grumble back, her hand gently rubbing over your arm.

"sulking, babe" she replies, dropping her purse to the ground.

"10 points for griffyndor" you sniffle as you scooch and sit up, pushing the blankets half off of you at which she sighs.

"wooyoung was not that good of a boyfriend for you to still be crying over him" lia presses her lips together concernedly.

She's right, you know it. It has almost been two months and you still feel like crying everytime someone mentions him.

"i know" you nod somewhat defeatedly "still, i was with him for almost a year and" you hiccup "he literally ripped my heart out and trampled on it"

"i know" lia nods understandingly "but i do think it would help if you went out again, even if its just for a night, you know just to be around people"

"it probably would but i just dont have the energy for it" you shrug your shoulders.

"i get it, girl, i really do" she pats your knee "both of my exes cheated on me, my only luck was that they were both awful at hiding it so i found out pretty quickly" she huffs.

You force out a chuckle, from what you heard from one of the girls that wooyoung cheated on you with, was that it started 3 months into your relationship.

"this the most humiliating thing ever, lia" you scoff "being with someone for so long, trusting them and telling them all your secrets and you think they are doing the same for you but then realizing that they were faking it all along to have multiple side chicks, and the fact that i was too oblivious to figure it out is the icing on the cake" you rub your forehead, feeling a migrane approach due to the sheer amount of crying you've been doing.

She seems to know what's happening and hands you the water bottle next to your bed "hydrate, sis"

So, you do. Taking four big gulps out of the water bottle.

Once you place the bottle next to you and tie your hair in a messy bun, you look at your roommate more thuroughly now that the tears are wiped away.

"you look pretty" you compliment her makeup and casual yet chic outfit "what'd you do tonight?"

Her contagious grin spreads over her face, eyes turning into little crescents.

"chris took me to the fair in town" lia grins before her face drops "I'm sorry, this is maybe not the time to ta-"

"No! It is, tell me about it" you interrupt her.

"O-okay" she nods hesitantly "well, i dont know if you've been keeping track but today was our fourth date and it was amazing" she gushes.

"I cant believe how much i like him, like, its crazy" she squeals a little, at which you giggle.

"so, fourth date huh? And he hasnt tried to get into your pants yet?" you quip.

"nope, i initiated our first kiss and other than that nothing" she whispers the last words before laughing.

"thats great" you smile, genuinely happy for her.

"Hmm yea" she sings as she gets up "i'll go to bed now too"

"Oh, hey, i have an idea" lia speaks up when standing in your doorway "chris has this performance thingy in two days, you should totally come!" she offers enthusiastically.

"he has a band?" you ask, partly to distract her from her offer.

"Hmm not really a band, they're a trio and there is this performance on saturday where a bunch of underground artists perform, i didnt fully listen if im honest" she giggles "but you should come with me!!" she jumps excitedly.

"i dont kno-"

"y/n pleasee? You'd do me a huge favor too because i dont know anyone there" lia pleads, clutchig her hands together.

"you know chris" you rebuttal.

"and what am i supposed to do when he's performing? stand around like an idiot? please y/n" she pouts.

"I dont really think this is my type of crowd..." you scratch your head.

"please please please" she jumps once more.

You sigh and tilt your head as you look at her sternly.

"one of his friends is single" she adds carefully.

"and cute" she sings "from what ive seen in pictures" she adds.

"lia" you groan.

"I'll do your laundry for two weeks if you come with me"

"you will?" Your head snaps towards her.

"yes i will! i promise, just come with me, please?"

A long sigh leaves your lips "okay"

-

The strong bass of the loud music rings in your chest as soon as you step foot into the club where “3racha” is supposed to be performing tonight.

Lia comes to a halt and you almost run into her because you were to busy checking out the venue and the other people around you.

“sorry” you mumble and hold onto her arm to avoid getting lost in the crowd.

She pulls out her phone and clicks on her and hers and chris’s chat, to figure out where to meet them, you assume.

“okay” lia puts her phone back into her jeans pocket and grabs your hand “they’re backstage, lets go”

“can we just go there?” you almost yell for her to understand what you’re saying.

“yea! Chris said he’ll make sure we’ll get in, come on” she tugs at your hand for you to walk faster.

You waddle behind her, barely dodging some drunk guys beer that goes flying before you arrive at the sign that says “artists only” and a black curtain behind it.

The guy standing infront of it raises a brow at the two of you before pointing at said sign “read ladies, no fans allowed”

“hey, they’re with me” a guy, you assume to be chris, taps on his shoulder and shows his artists badge, half of his body still covered by the curtain.

The bigger guy sighs and lets you through.

“thank you” lia lets go of your hand to loop her arms around chris’s neck once behind the curtain, they kiss and you look around.

Not because you are particularly uncomfortable, maybe still just a little bitter at happy couples.

You audibly clear your throat when they are still making out after a good ten seconds.

“oh-uhm” lia looks back at you after breaking the kiss “chris, this is y/n, y/n, chris” she giggles.

“hi y/n, nice to meet you” he gives you a quick hug and a smile full of dimples, finally understanding why your roommate is always swooning about him.

“hi” you smile back, somewhat forced.

“lets go to our dressingroom” chris suggests and leads the way.

Opening the door, he lets you and lia walk in first.

One guy is dancing around in the middle of the room, singing along to the current song that’s being played in the background with a water bottle as a pretend mic.

Another is one sitting on the small couch and laughing at him.

“oh, hi” the guy stops singing and quickly hides the bottle behind himself at which chris chuckles.

“guys, this is lia and y/n” chris points at the two of you before closing the door behind him.

“ooo the lia?” the waterbottle guy wiggles his eyebrows, at which you cant help but laugh as well, he isn’t very tall but looks lean.

“what is the lia supposed to mean?” lia laughs when chris comes up and slings an arm around her waist from behind her.

“I..well-I talk about you sometimes-“

“sometimes my ass” the guy sitting on the couch scoffs amusedly, your eyes shift to him.

He’s wearing a white baseball cap and a pretty tight fitted black Versace shirt, making his shoulders and arms look broad.

His hands clad in black half-gloves, he adjusts his cap before locking eyes with you and quickly looking down again.

“channie hyung must’ve forgotten his manners, I’m jisung” the waterbottle guy speaks up “and that’s changbin hyung” he points at the most intimidating-looking of the three of them, on the couch.

“channie?” lia squeals as she sits down with chris on the couch changbin is sitting on as well, jisung coming up to you.

“hey, you want something to drink?” he asks, pointing at the mini bar feigning cockiness  “we have a mini bar”

“woow” you chuckle, playing along “sure I’d love a drink”

“how come we’ve never met on campus before?” jisung asks after mixing you a vodka soda and sitting down on the second couch in the room.

“oh, you all go to uni here as well?” you ask surprisedly as you sit down next to him..

“yea” he grins “that’s how we all met” he points at lia and chris almost sitting on top of each other “and those two”

“oh I didn’t even know that” you take a sip, trying to loosen up “I guess I wasn’t listening when she was ranting on about him”

Jisung laughs and changbin joins the two of you as he sits down next to jisung.

“they just started calling each other bubs I feel like throwing up” changbin groans as he drinks from his beer.

You huff before jisung speaks again, looking from his friend back to you “he’s usually more romantic” he quips.

“I bet” you joke with him.

“yup” changbin locks eyes with you “that’s why I’m single, I’m just too romantic” he shakes his head sarcastically.

“ooh” you squint your eyes “emotional unavailability? love that in a man” you grin, at which his eyebrow quirks up amusedly.

“speaking of man, did minho hyung text you when he’d be here?” jisung asks his friend.

“yea he said he’ll be here in 5 and that you should finally buy a new phone” changbin answers, reading it from his phone at which jisung scoffs before turning to you.

“minho is my boyfriend” he explains “he’s hot” he grins at which you laugh “I bet”

“so, y/n, do you have a boyfriend?” jisung asks after taking a sip of his drink

“not anymore” you scoff, jisung inhales excitedly “guess what, changbin is single as well” he grins from ear to ear, comically looking back and forth between you two.

“oh, please dont start like lia” you chuckle, leaning forwards to lock eyes with changbin “no offense, but I only attract assholes”

He shakes his head, amusedly raising his brows “none taken” he grins at which you huff before a young woman comes into their dressing room to tell them they’re up next.

-

Back in the crowd, you and lia find a good place just as the lights dim and the music begins to play.

Suddenly you feel someone run into your side “woah I’m sorry” he quickly apologizes “this guy pushed me” he looks behind him.

“its alright” you nod, loud enough for him to hear.

Once they come outside, the crowd goes wild.

“jisungieee” the guy next to you all over sudden screams, you have to smile when looking at him.

“are you minho by any chance?” you ask him.

He nods aggressively “yea! do you know jisung?”

“I just met him backstage” you yell over the loud bass.

Minho laughs and nods before the bass drops and chris starts the first verse.

“he’s great right?” lia screams into your ear when the first chorus ends.

“yea” you nod, actually surprised at how good their music is, now understanding as to why the crowd loves them so much.

Changbin starts his verse and suddenly you feel somewhat entranced, his voice is rough and his bars are hard, definitely fitting his appearance but what entices you is the passion with which he appears to be performing.

Throughout their whole performance you cant take your eyes off him, the way his arms flex when he grips onto the microphone a little harder or the way his jugular sticks out when he growls into the microphone.

Not to mention the thighs you somehow didn’t notice in their dressing room, you watch them strain against his leather pants and feel even hotter suddenly.

Their last song ends and lia is quick to be in your ear about going backstage to chris again.

“oh you know chan hyung?” minho overhears and chimes in.

“yea she’s his date” you point at your overly excited roommate.

“changbin just texted and said they’re upstairs in the vip lounge, come with me” the brunette holds out his hand for you to take, which you do and grab lia with the other one.

“do you know where you’re going?” you ask minho after a minute of pressing yourself along sweaty dancing bodies.

“yea! they’re here a lot” he yells back “its right over there” he points to a flight of stairs where yet another bouncer is standing in front of.

“hey minho” the bouncer greats him with a fist bump “these girls are with you?” he points at lia and you.

“yea” he nods.

“trying something new, I see” he laughs atw hich you frown.

“oh, nono” minho chuckles uncomfortably “I’m still with jisung”

“ah-alright well, have fun” the bouncer moves after looking you all up and down, letting you walk up the stairs.

“wow, you’re famous” lia giggles at which minho huffs and shakes his head amusedly “yea, for being the only non-straight person they know”

“baby” you see jisung jump up from his seat in the spacious lounge as soon as you enter.

“hii” minho holds out his arms for him to run into, you cant stop yourself from smiling when you see jisung jump into his boyfriends arms.

“lia, y/n come over here” chris waves at the two of you.

“you were so good, baby” you hear minho praise jisung behind you as you walk over to the large round sitting booth where chan and changbin are sitting.

Lia slides into the booth and cuddles into chans side “you were awesome” she squeals as you sit down on the other end and grab a fresh glass from the middle of the round table, holding it next to changbins where he’s pouring cherry vodka into.

“can i get some?” you ask, he glances at you and smirks before silently filling your glass with a  double shots worth of the slightly rosy liquid.

“so, how did you like it?” he asks as he leans back, taking a swing of his drink.

“you guys were really good” you nod “to be honest I didn’t expect such high quality music”

He laughs, leaning his head back a little, his adams apple bopping with it.

You cant help but notice the sheer sheen of sweat that expands over his thick neck, obviously coming from their escapades on stage just now.

“what did you expect? a bunch of drunks playing wonderwall on the guitar for more drunks?” he grins, straight white teeth on display.

“hey, don’t come for wonderwall” you raise your hand jokingly at which he laughs.

“I wouldn’t dare” he raises his hands comically.

“hey” you whip your head around to see jisung and minho “scoot, please” jisung speaks again.

“oh-yea” you grab your drink and scoot further into the half circle-shaped booth.

“so what do you study?” changbin asks, his voice catches you off guard because you hadn’t calculated how close you’re sitting to him.

You turn to him to realise you’re close enough to smell his perfume and aftershave.

“uh- I- art” you answer shakily before taking a sip of your drink just to pull a face afterwards.

“jesus christ” you cough a little and hold your chest as changbin laughs.

“its stronger than you’d think” he grins “can you handle it?” he teases when your eyes get a little watery.

You stare at him for a second before playfully rolling your eyes “im good” 

His eyes trace over your face as you look around before he breaks the silence ”i can get you something else if you want” he offers.

“oh-uh no, I’m just being dramatic its fine” you chuckle.

“so...what do you study?” you change the topic.

“I’m majoring in music” he says, stretching out his arms over the backrest “all three of us are”

“oh, so you like, produce all your own stuff?” you ask, your eyes jumping to where his forearm touches your shoulder, that’s leaning against the backrest.

“yea, channie hyung composes the most, me and ji write a lot” he explains,

“thats really cool” you nod, looking over to the mentioned guy.

Changbin follows your eyes and huffs when the both of you see him and your roommate sucking face again.

After a few seconds they stop and giggle before standing up to go somewhere.

“where are they going?” you huff.

“I guess they want some alone time” he chuckles, lifting the arm close to you to take off the cap he’s still wearing.

You flinch when his forearm brushes your shoulder.

“are you scared of me?” he asks slowly, stopping his movements, cap still in hand.

“no- no” you shake your head, chuckling “I- its just been a while since I’ve gone out and I don’t know” you shrug “I feel a little lost”

“hm” changbin cocks his brow at your words, running one hand through his dark brown locks.

You divert your eyes from his bulging bicep back to his face quickly when he speaks again.

“any reason why?” he leans back again.

“oh, just a shitty ex and a shitty breakup” you shrug “I’m gonna spare you the details”

“aw, no please, tell me he had a small dick and everything, now im invested” he jokes.

You tsk at him and push his arm playfully, feigning annoyance.

“that still doesn’t answer my question as to why you jumped like that when my arm touched you” changbin raises his brows expectantly.

You open your mouth to speak but-

“we’ll go get some more to drink” minho interrupts you at which changbin nods.

“so?” he asks again, once minho and jisung leave.

“did that ex hit you? give me his address I’ll beat him up for you” changbin deadpans.

“no” you shake your head after taking another sip “he didn’t” you huff incredulously.

“its just- you look kinda scary” you blurt out finally.

His eyes widen before he falls into a boyish laughter, which you cant help but join.

“me?” he points at himself before laughing again, the image you had made up in your mind about him cracking.

“yea!” you raise your brows “when you look like this” you furrow your brows and lightly squint your eyes to mimic his resting bitch face.

“what the-” he splutters laughingly.

“stoop, don’t laugh” you hold onto his forearm, still giggling yourself.

He calms himself, subconsciously scooting closer to you in the now empty booth.

“maybe scary wasn’t the right word” you snicker, looking down.

“I think the word you were looking for was: sexy, hot or mysterious, maybe handsome-” he quips, grinning to himself when you start laughing again.

“no, no, I know what I meant” you joke back, just now noticing how close he is, his knee touching yours as his whole torso is turned to you.

“so none of my suggestions are accurate?” he cheekily raises one brow at which you scoff playfully.

“maybe one or two” you see his eyes jump to your lips.

The air suddenly feels thick around you with tension, changbins tongue darting out to wet his plump bottom lip while his eyes are still locked on yours.

You breathe in before the two of you lock eyes again "so…are you gonna kiss me, or just stare?"

He raises his brows at your sudden boost of confidence, grinning amusedly.

"what happened to me being scary?" he counters before urging you to swing one leg over his thighs with gentle hands.

You take a seat on his lap, straddling his thick thighs before looping your arms around his neck "i dont know, i think i'm into it" you quip.

His hands wander up your waist "well then i wont make you wait any longer" he grins, looking at your lips one last time before closing the gap inbetween you two.

You meet him in the middle, changbins grip on your waist tightens when his plush lips land on yours.

He pulls you closer to him, pushing his tongue past the seam of your lips.

You can taste the cherry vodka on his tongue but it riles you up even more, sucking at the wet muscle before his hands wander over the swell of your ass and each grab a handful of the flesh; your short skirt riding up when you subconsciously grind against his lap.

“be careful” he mumbles against your lips, gently tugging down the piece of fabric so you don’t expose yourself to bywalkers.

“where’s the fun in that?” you cock your head to the side teasingly.

Changbin scoffs and leans in again but you get interrupted by jisung.

“hey, we-oh” you whip your head around.

Jisungs frown turns into a grin “uh” he chuckles “we dont mean to interrupt but chan hyung texted minho and they’re going to your place” he points at you.

“ugh, seriously?” you mutter.

“I’m sleeping at minhos so, hyung you’ll have our place to yourself” he winks at changbin.

“so, we’re out too, have fun you guys” minho waves teasingly as jisung drags him away.

For a second you stare after them, until a gentle squeeze at your waist makes you turn around again.

“you could come over to my place if you don’t want to go to yours right now” he offers, eyes flickering to your lips when you bite at your lower one.

-

This is usually like not you, letting some guy you barely know take you home.

But here you are the next morning, looking up at the ceiling, changbins room flooded with daylight.

You sit up and look at the still unconscious changbin next to you. His blanket had fallen down and exposes his toned torso, barely covering his private parts.

A tingle forms in your lower abdomen when you think of what happened here a few hours ago.

But you pull yourself together and start looking around for your clothes.

You spot your bra on his desk and your skirt and shoes on the floor, gently shimmying out from underneath the blanket; you grab your skirt and slide it on without your panties, not being able to find them anywhere.

Right as you clasp your bra behind your back, changbins morning voice makes you flinch “you would’ve just snuck out?” he grumbles, rubbing his eyes as you look back at him.

“what? did you take me for a breakfast lover?” you quip as you slide into your shoes, looking around for your shirt.

“damn, that’s cold” he chuckles lowly, sitting up and watching you stride around his room.

“where did you put my shirt?” you ask, bending down to look under his desk.

“maybe you should worry about your panties first” he snickers, eyes glued to your core when you look back at him.

You kiss your teeth and straighten up quickly, having forgotten about your lack of underwear.

“not that that wasn’t a great view just now-“

“you’re not helping” you interrupt him, eyes lighting up when you spot your shirt in the hallway.

“why so serious all over sudden?” he grins “last night you were everything but tense”

You scoff as you pull your shirt over your head and stuff it into your skirt before grabbing your purse and phone.

“I have an exam in 2 days and I haven’t studied yet” you exhale.

“I could drive you home-“ he runs a hand through his messy hair.

“I’ll call a cab, uhm- thanks for last night” you hurriedly smile before walking out.

“bye” changbin calls after you, frowning and dropping back down onto his bed when he hears the door shut behind you “have a nice day I guess” he mumbles to himself.

 October

You cling your jacket closer to your body as you walk through the howling wind the seasonal change had brought with it.

When you arrive at lias faculty building you take out your phone to see if she texted you about when her lecture would be over.

lia : hey babe, chris took me to his place -received at 4:17 pm

You roll your eyes, typical you think.

you : are you serious? you begged me to walk home with you -sent at 4:25 pm

You see her the little blue bubble pop up, indicating that she’s writing a message.

lia : im sorry!! please don’t be mad, he surprised me :((( -received at 4:25 pm

You scoff and turn off your phone before slipping it in your coats pocket alongside your hands. Typical, you think, ever since that night at the club the two of them have become inseparable and lia cancelling on you had become a regular thing. You are happy for her but you also miss your friend.

“y/n?” a familiar voice calls after you right as you start to walk away, you freeze and turn around.

“yea?- oh” you swallow harshly when you see changbin walk your way.

“hey” he smiles brightly and you have to bite back a grin at the cute beanie he’s sporting alongside his slightly red nose due to the cold weather.

“hi” you smile timidly.

“you never texted” he tilts his head at which you nod.

“yea, sorry I actually never got your number” you look at the ground “uh- what are you doing here?”

“oh um im on my way to the studio” he points at a nearby building “that’s the music faculty”

“ah okay, well” you lock eyes “have fun then” you turn around again, ready to walk away.

“hey” he catches up with you “you wanna join me? check out some of our new stuff?” he burries his hands in the front pockets of his jeans.

“I don’t know, changbin I really don’t want to date right now-“ you start at which he chuckles.

“I didn’t ask you to marry me” he stops in his tracks, grinning when you do as well, locking eyes “come on, I just need an unbiased opinion on some new tracks” he tilts his head.

You inhale before looking around you “I could drive you home after? So you don’t have to walk through this weather?” he offers, raising his brows at which you purse your lips.

“alright” you give in, changbin smiles and extends his elbow for you to hold.

You simper and coyly hook your hand around his arm as the two of you start walking.

-

“this is awesome!” you point to his laptop a minute after he played the first song for you.

Changbin grins bashfully and leans back into his desk chair “you think?”

“yea, the hook is super catchy” you bob your head as his eyes fix on your profile “you’re really talented, changbin” you catch him blushing before putting on another song.

After a few other songs, he takes off his headphones when you take off yours.

“can I ask you something?” he asks, you glance at him.

“you just did” you quip at which he huffs, “sure” you nod.

“how much of that night do you remember?” he fiddles with one of the rings on his left hand.

“why?” you ask back.

“well, you seemed really upset the next morning so I got kind of scared that you didn’t actually want it and I kind of took advantage of you” he recalls the night the two of you spent together.

“oh, no. you didn’t take advantage of me, I wasn’t even  drunk and I would’ve told you if I had changed my mind or something. That was just the first time I ever spent the night at a guys house for a one night stand” you absently pick off some fuzzies from your jeans.

“plus I had just come out of a relationship so I was a little too emotional anyways” you chuckle.

“alright” changbin nods “just wanted to make sure” he smiles down at his hands “cause I remember all of it”

You whip your head, scoffing when you see him with a shit eating grin on his face.

“hm” you feign ignorance as you lean back “I don’t know, there wasn’t a lot to remember” you grin mischievously.

He laughs out loud, leaning forwards “no?”

You shake your head, pursing your lips comically “nah”

“cause I remember you shaking and screaming” he grins.

You shrug your shoulders “weird, must’ve faked it” you deadpan, fiddling with the headphones you’re still holding.

Changbins tongue prods on the inside of his cheek, huffing when he catches you grinning.

“right” he grins slumping into his seat a little further.

A thought flashes in your head when your gaze drops to his crotch and thick thighs, you swallow some spit in frustration as you feel your core getting hotter.

He was right, the night was amazing, maybe that was even part of the reason you stormed out the way you did.

You clench your thighs for some relief, anything really.

“want me to refresh your memory?” your eyes jump up to meet his, you open your mouth but nothing comes out; do you want him to?

Yes. Yes you do.

So, you get up and straddle him on his chair: his hands instantly gripping at your hips, pulling you closer.

“someones eager” he grins, pushing some of your hair behind your ear.

“shut up” you whisper before crashing your lips onto his.

Changbin groans when you tug at his hair, inviting you to slip your tongue in between his lips and grind your hips over his crotch.

He hisses before propping himself up on one armrest and holding your lower back with the other as he stands up; you squeal but he holds you before sitting you back down on the desk, next to his laptop.

“now who’s eager” you grin when his hands find the waistband of your leggings and tug them down with your panties in one.

He huffs as he bunches your leggings and panties around your ankles before slipping underneath the fabric barrier and inbetween your legs.

“by the looks of it..” he runs a finger through your wet folds “still you” he quips before pushing one finger in without warning.

You moan, you head dropping back onto the hard wooden surface.

“look at me” changbin orders as a second finger prods at your entrance, you whimper but prop yourself up on your elbows.

He curls the two fingers and pumps them almost violently, the palm of his hand smacking your clit with every pump.

“oh god-“ you yelp, your eyes scrunching together as your hips buck up.

“its changbin but god is fine too” he quips as he lowers his head, you curse at him, even though you have to laugh a little.

“you’re so annoy-ah!” you cry out because suddenly his tongue is lapping over your swollen clit, sucking on it forcefully when you claw one hand into his already messed up dark locks.

“fuck-bin- gonna cum” your hips stutter and you feel the pleasure that’s blooming in your tummy is getting ready to snap.

“mmh” he humms against you “cum then, baby” he moans, knowing full well what the added vibrations are doing to your body when your chest arches and your mouth drops open.

Your cries fill the studio as you clamp down on his fingers; he rides your through your high, holding down your hips with his unoccupied hand because you squirm with the euphoria that’s filling your veins.

“good girl” he mumbles, removing his fingers from you before bringing them up to your lips “now, suck them clean for me, yea?” he grins, lips and chin shiny with your cum.

-

“finally” you huff when arriving at 3rachas lounge in a club out of town; where they had just performed “this club is huge” you breathe, jisung scooting and changbin letting you squeeze past him to take a seat in between them as they chuckle.

Lia and chan already lost in their own world again as she drags him to the dancefloor, squealing when chan teasingly squeezes her sides as they disappear into the crowd.

“they are made for each other” minho sighs, sitting down and giving jisung the second beer from his hands.

“I know right” you lean back, breathing in.

“you’re still out of breath?” changbin laughs at you at which you hit his arm.

“stop it, oh my god” you feign annoyance “you know how exhausting it is to dodge beer bottles and not loose lia? she’s like a Chihuahua, I swear, you loose her once and its over” you chuckle, jisung and minho laughing too.

“you just don’t have any endurance, woman” changbin grins teasingly.

“that’s so not true” you laugh incredulously “what about two nights ago-“

“AH-“ jisung interrupts you, placing his hands over his ears “please spare us your sex stories, I hear enough of that when you’re over, babe”

You huff and changbins cheeks turn red.

“you guys are fucking?” minho asks, eyebrows raised as he takes a swing of his beer.

“good job keeping up, baby” jisung pats his boyfriends thigh teasingly at which he tsks at him.

“are you together or what?” minho props his elbow on the table to support his chin with his hand as he looks at the two of you expectantly.

“no, we’re not” you chuckle somewhat uncomfortably before looking over at changbin who just grins awkwardly.

“just here to be a good friend and keep the groupies away” you joke “right?” you nudge changbin with your elbow at which he nods swiftly, looking down again.

“yea, baby don’t be so old fashioned” jisung teases his boyfriend who just rolls his eyes playfully.

“speaking of groupies” minho mutters, spotting a group of girls just before they approach the lounge.

“hey jisungie, you wanna dance?” a pretty blonde girl bats her eyelashes as she leans down a bit to expose more of her cleavage, making jisung grin.

“baby, you’re gorgeous but I’m very gay” he nods apologetically, “Oh” she straightens up “really? You sure?”

You and changbin have to bite back a laugh when jisung nods again “very sure, thanks though, for coming”

She shrugs and looks at changbin “what about you? Wanna dance?”

“uh-“ changbin starts but you cut him off “he’s with me actually” you tilt your head.

“for real?” she stems her hands into her hips as she looks back at her posse, scoffing.

“yea” changbin loops his strong arm around your waist and pulls you closer to him “that’s my girl, so a little respect, please”

“aww” you coo dramatically as you play along, putting your hand on his jaw to turn his head towards you before you lock lips.

“whatever” you faintly hear the girls voice get quieter when changbin slips his tongue in between your lips.

“they’re gone” you hear minho but changbin pulls your legs to dangle over one of his thighs as he grips your waist.

“guys” jisungs voice only registers in the back of your head when changbin sucks at your bottom lip and you run your fingers through the hair on the back of his head.

“can I get you some more beers?” the waitresses voice pulls the both of you out of your trance as you break the kiss abruptly.

Jisung laughs, shaking his head at the both of you before turning to the waitress “we’ll take a round of shots I think”

  November

 “fuck-harder” you gasp “..mhh binnie-shit” you moan while changbin pounds into you from behind, gripping your hip tighter with one of his hands; the other one migrating up your back to gather the legth of your hair, twisting them before he pulls at their root.

You groan when you feel your hair getting pulled back, neck stretching as he picks up his pace.

“like this? fuck you love this don’t you?” he breaths ragged, but you can hear the dirty smirk that lingers on his lips every time you have rough sex..

You moan out loudly when he releases your hair and pushes your torso down onto the mattress, your hand pulling at the sheets , needing something to grip and release the pleasure.

“fuck- answer me, slut” he grunts and delivers a harsh slap to your ass.

You cry out “yes-yes-fuck-love it” you desperately gasp as he leans down to you, earning a low chuckle which sends shivers down your back.

His lips latch onto your shoulder blade and start sucking on the skin until a purple mark blooms under his lips.

“fuck” you let out a strangled yell when the hand on your hip makes its way to your front and he started circling your clit with his fingers, the pace and firmness matching his thrusts.

You cry out for him as you clench furiously around his cock “that’s a good girl” he whispers, only letting go of your clit when you flinch in overstimulation.

“cum for me- fuck baby, cum for me and let the others know who’s fucking you this good” he rasps in your ear. Not 5 seconds later, your orgasm ripples through you and you would’ve collapsed completely if he wasn’t holding you up.

You’re still panting when both of his hands go back on your hips and push them down, laying you flat on the mattress before he picks up his pace again with his last left strength to reach his own high.

“shit- y/n“ he grunts when you tighten around him again and you feel him filling the condom with some drawn out groans and a sharp hiss.

After a few seconds of nothing but heavy breathing filling the room, he pulls out and falls next to you on his bed.

You wince at the soreness that’s already presenting itself when you turn around on your back, looking over to him; you watch as he ties a knot in the condom and throws it into the trash next to his desk.

“kobe!” he exclaims gleefully at his perfect throw before looking back at you to see if you saw.

“jesus christ why am I sleeping with you” you hold your hands over your face, hating the fact that it made you laugh.

He gasps, feigning to be offended “that’s not how you speak to the guy that just made you cum three times”

“you are so full of yourself, seo changbin” you shake your head amusedly as you sit up.

“wait, I’ll clean you up” changbin is quick to rise from his comfortable position to grab some tissues from his nightstand.

“come here” he mumbles, gently urging you to lie back down before carefully wiping your own cum off your inner thighs and mound.

You watch him as he gently moves to wipe the tissue over your puffy folds, your hips jumping a little when he accidentally passes your clit.

“sorry” he grins, pressing a kiss to your angled knee; at which you feel your heart lurch forward a bit.

Woah, wait.

You’ve been seeing changbin just for sex for almost two months now, you’ve even gone with him other performances and after parties to keep groupies away and be his arm candy and never has your heart done this.

Mayday. Abort mission.

“should be good for now” changbin shrugs, shooting you a sweet smile before turning away from you to also get rid of the tissues.

You use the opportunity to shuffle to the side of his bed and slip on your panties before grabbing your bra.

“hey, you wanna leave already?” changbin asks “I thought we could hang” he tucks his hand under his head as you look back at him, clipping your bra closed “watch a movie or something”

“sorry, I promised lia I’d help her clean the apartment today” you lie, surprisingly quick, before pulling your hoodie over your head.

“so you’re just gonna fuck me and leave again?” he jokes dramatically “I don’t even get cuddles?”

“shut up” you chuckle.

“am I nothing more to you than a pretty piece of meat?” he continues as you slip into your jeans, rolling your eyes playfully.

“a toy you use when you need stress relief??” he holds his chest dramatically.

You step into your shoes and raise your brows at him.

“are you complaining?” you ask playfully.

“nahh” he pulls his covers over his abs as he watches you grab your jacket from his desk chair.

"At least give me a 'gopdbye, thanks for the bomb dick, kiss" He grins when you scoff at him. So, you lean over him and press a quick peck to his lips; he whines playfully when you lean back up again, sitting up and catching your lips with his roughly once more.

“alright, see ya” you shrug."

And shit, your heart does it again. What are you doing?

You break the kiss and ruffle through his hair.

“ugh” he huffs annoyedly, fixing his hair “I hope you have trouble walking” he quips as you go for the door.

“I’ll text you if I don’t” you wink at him before closing his door, leaning against it from the outside and closing your eyes.

“fuck” you whisper to yourself before making your way through the guys apartment.

“don’t break his heart, y/n” minhos voie comes from behind as you twist the doorknob.

“huh?” you trun around to look at him, he’s wearing a shirt that you know to be jisungs so he must be staying over.

“I’ve known changbin for a while, he seems tough but he’s a softie deep down” he crosses his arms over his chest “he hurts easier than you think”

“we- we’re both not in this for anything serious” you stammer “what do you mean?”

“I see the way he looks at you, y/n” minho smiles softly “I’m not telling you how to live your life, just, be honest with him… and yourself for that matter” he quirks one brow up, smiling before disappearing around the corner.

 -

 You squint your eyes as you’re trying to make out the label of the cereal boxes in the upper shelves, looking back at your phone you check to see what brand lia had texted you about so you don’t accidentally buy the wrong thing.

“fuck” you mumble when you see her desired cereal at the top of the shelf, so you reach up but to no avail.

“y/n?” you lower your heels to the floor again before turning around to see…

“hyunjin?” you face drops in awe.

“hey!” the tall young man smiles widely, opening his arms and inviting you to a hug.

“wow, hi” you hug him back.

Damn, what happened to him? The last time you saw him was before he moved away in 10th grade.

You used to be good friends with him, or, well, the freakishly skinny and lanky highschool version of him you met in dance class.

By the feel of it, even through the trenchcoat he’s wearing, you can tell he’s bulked up quite a bit.

After letting go of him, you cant help but stare.

His acne had cleared up and his brown hair is chin length with the top parts pulled back into a little pony tail, leaving some face framing strands in the front.

“wow- you look-“ you blink a few times to make sure you’re not dreaming “…really good, hyunjin”

He smiles on the ground, his pretty plump lips parting to reveal beautiful pearly whites which used to be covered by braces.

“so do you” he grins.

“no- I mean you look… good-good” you splutter, laughing awkwardly “like what are you a model now or something?”

“actually, yea- part time” he chuckles.

“oh” you huff  “wow of course” you shake your head laughingly, blushing furiously when he doesn’t break eye contact.

“so- uhm” you gulp, making him grin even wider “what are you doing here?”

“I’m transferring here” he nods “better dance programme” he explains shortly.

“oh you still dance” you observe out loud “I haven’t danced in a while” you look down.

“you should come by after practice sometime” he offers “to catch up- or dance if you want” he giggles, a little dimple appearing on his left cheek.

“yea, I’d love that” you smile, nodding before he takes out his phone.

“put in your number, I’ll text you” he smiles softly when holding it out to you.

“mhm” you agree, saving your number in his phone and trying not to think about him staring at you the whole time.

“alright well” he checks his phone for the time, you guess “I gotta get going, only came here for this” he chuckles, holding up a carton of milk that you, weirdly enough, haven’t noticed until now.

“alright” you nod before he moves in for a hug again.

“bye” he smiles when loosening his arms again.

“bye” you mumble, staring at the back of his perfect head as he walks away.

You were about to pull out your phone and rant to lia about what just happened, when he stops in his tracks and turns around.

“almost forgot” he grins, reaching up and getting your cereal from the top shelf; winking when he places it in your hands, your body freezing.

“bye” he grins, walking away before you could thank him.

-

 You had taken hyunjin up on his offer and met him in the dance studio after class where he showed you some of his contemporary pieces before you made your way to the popular coffee shop on campus together.

“-no seriously the second piece was my favourite I think, but they were all amazing!” you smile up at him at which he shakes his head cutely.

“can you stop complimenting me, y/n I’m getting all nervous” he laughs softly.

“oh please” you quip “with your talent and looks I would think nothing could make you nervous” you roll your eyes playfully.

Hyunjin huffs, opening the coffee shops door for you “you can” he says softly as you walk past him, you turn around to him to see him blush a litte but diverting his eyes to the big menu above the counter.

Did he just flirt with you? No, you must be tripping.

You look around to see only two other people sitting in one of the booths together, the cold must keep most people home, you think before hyunjin gently pulls at your sleeve to get your attention.

“what do you want?” he asks, the barista looking at you expectantly.

“uhm- a hot chocolate please” you say, reaching in your purse to get your wallet.

“I’ll take the same” hyunjin smiles politely, giving the barista money.

“on me” he smiles down at you.

“oh, thank you” you smile sheepishly, letting go of your purse again.

Once your hot chocolates are ready, you sit down in one of the booths, hyunjin sliding in to sit across from you.

“I was back home last week before I came here, you’ll never guess who I met” hyunjin grins.

“who?” you ask curiously.

“tim” he grins.

“tim?” your eyes almost pop out of your head “as in my first boyfriend tim?” you laugh, holding your hand to your face incredulously.

“but he moved away as well?” you half ask.

“yea he said he was visiting his grandparents, but guess the best part” hyunjin bites his lip

“what?” you chuckle.

“he got a nose job” hyunjin bites back a laugh when you gasp surprisedly “really?”

“one word” hyunjin says “botched…”

“aw no, poor tim” you frown, looking down at your hot drink as memories from back in the day come back to you.

“he always used to put his hand up my shirt when hugging” you frown, making hyunjin laugh.

“it was 9th grade y/n what did you expect?” you scoff at his rethorical question.

“I don’t know, some basic manners maybe?” you counter playfully…slowly letting the conversation die down as you both take sips from your cocoa.

“how come we never dated?” he asks softly after aminute of silence, looking up at you.

“we were friends?” you chuckle awkwardly.

“come on” hyunjin sits back in his booth “you must’ve known I had the biggest crush on you”

“you did?” you almost launch forwards in your seat, making hyunjin laugh.

“well, I guess you didn’t know then” he giggles, hiding his face in his hands embarrassedly.

“anyways, I would’ve paid good money to be able to slip my hand up your shirt” he jokes, cheeks reddening when you laugh.

“I honestly liked you a lot back then” you say “if you would’ve said something we might’ve actually gone out” you shrug gently.

“damn, way to rub that in my face” hyunjin grins.

You hold his eye contact for a few seconds before you feel your blood rushing to your cheeks again, quickly lifting up your mug to take a sip and partly cover your face.

When you put your mug back down, hyunjin grins widely, mumbling a “cute” before slowly bringing his hand to your chin and gently swiping his thumb over your top lip where a foam mustache had formed.

You gulp when he swiftly sucks the foam off his thumb, your eyes darting from his eyes to his lips.

When he notices, he leans over, slowly as if scared to overwhelm you.

That’s when minhos words pop up in the back of your head.

“be honest with him, and yourself for that matter”

But you aren’t together, and hyunjin is great and you want to kiss him but you know it would be wrong.

However, before you know it his lips are on yours and you’re not doing anything to stop him.

They are soft and inviting and you let him swipe his tongue over the seam of your lips, but then the little doorbell rings and you hear lias voice, followed by a male one before they abruptly stop, making you pull away abruptly.

Oh.

There they are, lia, chan, jisung and changbin; looking at you.

“y/n” lia grins widely, approaching your table “aren’t you gonna introduce us?” she squeals, hyunjin clears his throat and sits back down.

The three guys hesitantly follow lia when-

“woah- hyunjin?” chan speaks up.

“chan-hyung?” hyunjin gets up from his place to receive a hug from the older one as your eyes divert to changbin who is looking at the ground.

You aren’t together. Then why do you feel so guilty and why does he look so disappointed.

“he’s cute, girl” jisung grinningly interrupts your daydreaming, nodding towards chan and hyunjin who are still talking.

You force out a smile.

“how do you two know each other?” lia asks curiously.

“he went to my highschool, the last few years” chan grins.

“what a coincidence” you mumble, almost ironically.

“I went to highschool with y/n too, the first couple years though, then I moved away” hyunjin explains “oh, im sorry, I’m hyunjin by the way” he turns to jisung and changbin.

“I’m jisung, this is changbin” jisung smiles, pointing at his grumpy friend.

“I’m lia” lia grins “his girlfriend and her best friend” she points at chan before snuggling up to you, giggling.

Jesus, woman where do you get the energy? Is what you want to ask but you just flash another forced smile, hoping this moment will pass quickly.

“where were you guys?” you change the topic, hoping changbin would maybe look at you if you spoke up.

“oh, I caught them all huddled up in the studio” lia grins “they probably haven’t been outside in a week again” she giggles.

“true” jisung quips.

“hey lets all sit down” hyunjin suggests.

“I’ll get a coffee” changbin mumbles, walking back to the counter.

You usher lia to make way for you to get out of the booth, following him.

“bin” you stand next to him as he looks up at the menu but he ignores you.

“you could at least acknowledge my presence, your highness” you quip annoyedly.

“what do you want me to say, y/n?” he mutters.

“I didn’t know this would happen with him or I would’ve told you” you say, looking back at the other four talking and laughing in the booth.

“we’re not together y/n, you’ve made that very clear; if you wanna kiss lord farquaad go ahead, I’m not stopping you” he looks over to the booth as well.

“jesus christ” you huff “why are you so defensive then?”

“hi” changbin greets the barista who just came from the back “I’ll have an iced coffee to go, please” he orders.

“the world doesn’t revolve around you y/n, maybe I’m having a bad day” he answers when the barista makes his way to the coffee machines, you feel a lump from in your throat.

“yea, well thanks for making mine bad as well” you turn on your heels to join the others, hyunjin sees you coming back and scooches to make some space for you next to him.

You smile and thank him quietly when he also gives you your mug.

“everything alright?” he asks quietly, as to not disturb the others conversation.

“yea, just had to ask him some stuff” you smile at which he smiles back, turning back to the others.

After a minute changbin approaches the booth with his iced coffee “hey, I’ll run back to the studio I gotta finish that track”

“ugh, changbin I just dragged you out of there, stay for a second” lia protests and jisung nods along.

“nah, gotta get it done tonight” he shakes his head.

“alight see you later” chan nods.

“nice to meet you, man” hyunjin says, nodding at him as well.

“yea” changbin answers tight-lipped before walking out.

 December

”I’m sorry, hyunjin” you frown “I’m just not ready for a relationship after what happened with my ex-“

“its alright y/n” his large hand encases yours “you don’t have to explain yourself to me”

You sigh in relief “I’m sorry I tried to rush things, it just, seemed to good to be true to find you here and everything” he says.

“but I’ll wait for you, if that’s what you want” he looks up at you.

“oh, jinnie you shouldn’t have to do that” you shake your head “I’m sure there are great girls out there who are emotionally ready to be with you”

“yea, but you’re the girl I want to be with” he says softly and your heart shatters into pieces because you’re not sure he’s the guy you want to be with.

-

You fight yourself through the crowd at 3rachas last performance of the year, at the same venue where you met them for the first time. Just like the time before, chan makes sure lia, hyunjin, minho and you are able to come backstage.

“I’m excited to see you perform, man” hyunjin grins at chan, patting his shoulder “your stuff was already dope back then…” they continue speaking as you enter their dressing room.

Jisung greets his boyfriend as you and lia sit down on the leather couch.

Changbin is standing in front of the mirror, fixing his hair before his eyes lock with yours through the mirror, but he just diverts them to chan who’s grabbing a beer for hyunjin and himself, you guess.

“did you have to invite him?” changbin semi-whispers to the older one, nodding at hyunjin, chan just frowns confusedly,making changbin shake his head and walk out.

You look at hyunjin who is talking to minho and jisung, and doesn’t seem to have heard changbin. So, you get up to follow him out but lia holds your wrist “y/n you cant keep running after him” she hisses.

“he cant keep treating me like im invisible, I just want to clear the air” you free your arm and walk out to see changbin almost at the end of the corridor, walking out of a heavy door which, you think leads outside.

After reaching the door you open it to find him outside, leaning against the brick wall of the building, looking down at his phone.

The cold air hits your skin and you shiver, only wearing a top and some jeans since its warm in the club.

Changbin notices you and looks up “what do you want, y/n?” he asks.

“that was real classy back there” you comment, holding your arms to your body to preserve some warmth. Changbin huffs, unfazed as he looks back at his phone “whatever, y/n”

“no, not whatever bin” you step closer to him “he asked me to date him” his head shoots up and you lock eyes, for a second they are soft in the way they look into yours but something changes and they turn mean when he speaks again.

“so? that’s a you proplem” he shrugs.

“its not a problem at all, he’s sweet and loving and cares about me but for some reason im standing here, hoping that you’ll give me a reason to not be with him” you feel your throat closing up with anger mixed with confusion when he starts chuckling.

“you’re not serious are you?” he squints and your heart drops, tears pooling at your lashline.

“of course not, I couldn’t expect someone as stubborn and- and comunicationally incompetent like you to understand anything about feelings” you turn on your heels when a teardrop rolls down your cheek.

A hand wraps itself around your wrist, making you turn back “I’ve wanted to be with you since that moment in the club where you kissed me infront of all these girls. It was always you who was stubborn y/n, you never wanted to spend anymore time with me other than fucking” he snaps at you, taking a breather to start another sentence but you cut him off.

“-then why didn’t you say anything?” you ask quietly and he looks down.

“because- fuck” he lets go of your wrist “I didn’t want to scare you away, you in my bed was better than no you at all. But then fucking prince charming appears out of no where and sweeps you off your feet-”

“but I don’t want prince charming I want you” you blurt out, tears now streaming down your face, making him take a step back as his eyes soften.

“then why didn’t you say anything?” a small smile tugs at his lips as he closes the distance between you, gently running his hands up your arms, feeling the goosebumps brought on by the cold.

You huff, looking down and watching one of your teardrops melting a tiny hole into the snow before looking back up “because I’m stubborn and comunicationally incompetent” you sniffle “and stupid apparently” 

A grin spreads over changbins face as his hands cradle your cheeks, wiping your tears away with his thumbs “so, you wanna be stubborn and stupid together?” he whispers, locking eyes with you.

You press your lips together, trying to keep yourself from sobbing even more as you nod.

He chuckles softly ”you can stop crying now, baby” at which you nod beathing in shakily but smiling when he pushes some hair out of your face.

“can you kiss me now please” you sniffle whiningly, huffing in a laugh when he pulls a face.

“i dont know babe, you’re a little snotty right now-” he jokes.

“shut up” you hit him, chuckling when he pulls you even closer by your waist and gently connects his lips with yours.

A soft wind blows through your hair and you loop your arms around his neck even tighter, deepening the kiss at which he moans, holding your waist tighter to his body.

The door creaks open and “are you guys finally together?” minhos voice makes you break the kiss.

“yea” you grin when jisung comes out after his boyfriend.

“nice” he grins, nodding at you.

“yea yea nice, beautiful love whatever, hyung we’re up, lets go” jisung rambles, laughing and running back inside when changbin pretends to hit him, minho shaking his head and following him.

“you’ll watch me yea?” your boyfriend grins at you, taking your hand and planting a kiss on the back of it.

“from the front row, baby”

-

a/n: omg im finally done wth this took me so long yall, i started writing this sin september (which is why the fic starts in september as well lol) sorry about the winterly feelings i’m pushing onto you in the end but last week it literally snowed where i live so i was like uh?!?!?!? okay lets write some snowy shit, global warming ftw i guess....anyways i hope u liked it pls leave some feedback and/or ur favourite part ig lol i would appreciate it alot <33 (not proofred yet oopsie)

---

taglist: @kpopscape​ @oopsie-whats-this​ @zhaqifa​ @synnocence​ @changlix-mp4​ + some besties who always inspire me wether they know it or not😭 @bangtantaegi @hanflix @bruh-changbin @hyunyin @yyxgin @hyunsluvv @unstableskzstan @violethhj @missskzbiased @cartierbin @dom--minnie

[saintobio]

Hi Saint! 👋 I hope you're doing good

Ok, blimey, SN was a rollercoaster of emotions but I absolutely loved it! You write amazingly!

My thoughts. Y/N has all the right to be p*ssed off with Gojo. She has all the right to separate and live her life. She's not obliged to stick around and "fix" Gojo. But, big BUT, she had no right to keep their son from him. Was Gojo an arsehole, heck yeh. But he was really trying after the first divorce incident and nanas death. He was stupid for the house thing and not just being honest when trying to fix their relationship. I think that Y/N is going to feel like absolute shite when she finds out that Gojo tried to unalive himself when he thought she got rid of the baby. And now the accident because he realised he was alive this whole time!

Gen and their dad, wasn't a great idea to support hiding the munchkin from Gojo. Yes protect your daughter and sister, but you're making her do some silly things.

Now saying all of that, I'm going to counter myself 😅 I can somewhat get why Y/N would have wanted to get as far away from Gojo. Especially holding on the beginning part of their marriage. Then to hear his stupidity at the end would have brought up the previous thoughts. As a woman, I may do the same to protect my child (maybe not exactly the same tbh... lol I still don't like that Y/N hid this from Gojo for 3 flaming years!). I can see she was trying to protect herself and her child, but it wasn't a great way imo.

In the same way, I get Gen and why she may have supported this. As an older sister, I'm a surrogate mother to my siblings and can be protective.

Right this was too long. I'm sorry 😅 don't even know if I made any sense whatsoever.

My main ask was going to be: may I get permission to write a mini one shot type scenario based on the last chapter? I was so wound up in my emotions after reading the last chapter, I had all sorts of thoughts and ideas that I'd like to jot down and share. But only with your permission! X

hahah it’s very conflicting right ?? i love how ur analysis on it tho :) and yess you may write a oneshot as long as i get tagged <33 looking forward to it !!

@hollowpurpl said

I'm not blaming y/n for keeping the baby then hiding it. Yes, it is true that my heart aches because satoru didn't get to cry in joy after the baby was born, but what matters is the munchkin is alive. It would burn me more if the lil munchkin died. Besides, it was the most selfish thing y/n has done in a while. I can't hate her. Her ex-husband was a selfish cheating asshole. I understand that satoru wanted to change but, he's not that deserving to have an expressway to happy ever after. It's just karma (or saint) doing its job.

For toji, i think he won't have the audacity to cheat on y/n because of gen and the kids like hello??? But i do think mc just reminds him of his wife, that's why he wants to marry her. (This shit hurts so much because im a toji fucker)

And im sorry for sending lots of asks. I just love sn so much i cried when i didn't get on the sincerely yours taglist.

Drink your water and eat veggies saint! Every sn reader is praying to u ❤️

Anonymous said

Y/n keeping munchkin from gojo makes so much sense to me. She just prioritised her child's health and happiness more than theirs IT WAS LITERALLY THE BEST THING TO DO IN THAT SITUATION AND PPL WHO HATE HER FOR DOING IT CLEARLY DONT KNOW WHAT THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT LIKE????? imagine a child growing up in the kind of negative publicity that surrounded gojo post the scandal... yeah no. she did the right thing definitely and I rlly hope she knows that :((

Anonymous said

I think some people forget that soulmates who don’t end up together can fall in love with someone else. Granted the connection won’t be as deep as with their twin flame, but it’s not impossible to love again. Tbh I don’t care if gojo x uhtamie happen, Toji x y/n or gojo x y/n. I just think it’s unfair that her hiding her pregnancy is going to hunt her ten fold. I really like that she didn’t hide from munchkin who her real daddy is though. Mad respect for that.

Anonymous said

Omg I’ve been dying to send an ask in! First off congratulations on sn1, it was amazing!! Okie, I’m sorry for all the upcoming grammar mistakes lmao, but I need to write it before I forget x.x Over the past few days I analyzed both y/n and gojo’s situation. I’ve seen how most people are upset with y/n for depriving Gojo 3 years of his sons life and thinking he “killed” his baby, and some agree that y/n made the right call faking the abortion. I was just shocked at how quick people switch sides instead of analyzing both parties. I remained neutral.

I do agree that her depriving him from the birth of his son and making him believe that he was at fault was wrong, but did the readers take a step back and think how his past consequences drove her to do it? It hurts that Gojo never got to tell his side of the story, and now with amnesia probably never will, but it also hurts knowing that y/n was treated horribly throughout most of their marriage. Yes, he had a lovely redemption arc, but the thing about Gojo and y/n is that although they’re soulmates, they’re badly flawed. He had this ideal dream family, but didn’t know the current y/n. Just bits and pieces. He was more familiar with the little girl he was best friends with, whom he made a promise too. Y/n suffered a lot the first few months in their marriage, which causes her to start having trust issues, and clearly those trust issues were still rooted just untouched. In my honest opinion, seeing as to how badly flawed they both are, if there was no divorce, munchkin would be the only thing that would tie them together. I’m sorry this was long :’) also hoped this made sense.

Also, I noticed something. You said the zenin family is y/nxToji, but everyone else is GojoxY/n. Does that mean Gen has forgiven Gojo? 😟

nooo gen hasn’t. i take back what i said. very few people in the snverse are rooting for gojoxyn 🥲

Anonymous said

imo, I think y/n had a good enough reason to hide munchkin from Satoru. BUT y/n should have told Satoru when she had the chance, when he came to see her.

Anonymous said

Yooooooooo I sad .

Because I don’t know who’s in the wrong in the SN finale ?? Like I get each of Y/N’s and Satoru’s feelings and mistakes and whatnot, but now at what cost? While I definitely believe Satoru is much to blame for actions to Y/N, his past and how he was brought up shaped him that way, yet he was able to change; and he’s even worse for wear?? And even now Y/N, who’s suffered so much and very much doesn’t owe Satoru anything (besides telling the truth of baby Gojo), will have to go through this again???

there’s really a huge divide among the readers bc some people understand yn’s pov (like u guys in this case) while some choose to side w gojo for good reasons. but all in all, thank u for sharing ur reactions <33 it allows me to understand how people are reading into the series and i’m glad that most of my readers are still looking at this story with depth

[uhhhhforgetaboutit]

Heyyy, so I made picrews of my re8 ocs. Here we have Elaine Dogwood Giannatacio (usually just goes by Elaine Dogwood since some people [cough Heisenberg and Angie cough] cannot pronounce her last name) and Isabel Sato.

Elaine is 5'11 and rather gangly. She kinda stands there like 🧍‍♀️ most the time lmao. Her voice is deeper and smooth, but with just enough rasp to be *chefs kiss* perfect.

Isabel is 5'3 and just small. Not in a super-short-oompa-loompa way, but just a petite way. Her voice is really soft and sweet. The kind of voice you could fall asleep to. Also she can sing! She's not like American Idol or anything but she has a good voice.

Anyway, let us start with Elaine shall we?

Elaine is a very deadpan person with a quick wit and a subtle sense of humor. She likes to keep her emotions under lock and key for the most part. She fears people won't tolerate her if she spills all her negative emotions, so she tends to keep them bottled up. However, she is not a cold or unkind person. Quite the opposite actually, she loves to help people and animals (animals!!!).

Now, about her "powers" (cadou induced abilities) They consist of extreme persuasion/compulsion. By making eye contact with her red eye she is able to compel basically anyone to do anything. Now, Elaine usually wears an eye patch over her red eye because she worries she may accidentally compel someone. However, she does use her ability if she feels lazy or angry and can regret her choices later on. She also compels animals into being her pets because she is lonely.

Now, on to Isabel!

Sweet little Isabel is simply a small town girl who ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time. She wanted to strike out on her own and make a life for herself, but ended up being kidnapped by Daniela. So now she finds herself working as a maid in the Dimitrescu castle. It's not all bad, Alcina treats her employees considerably well. For the most part.

Now, the girls are awfully fond of Isabel because of her inherently sweet nature. Of course Isabel is terrified of the girls, but she doesn't let them know that. She is kind to them, even when they are covered in blood and a bit manic. She makes sure they're warm and happy, and they love that. Of course it's literally Isabel's job but if she was being honest, she'd probably help then anyway. Even though the girls are bloodthirsty and a bit sadistic, Isabel couldn't help but see their personalities underneath. She had grown to love them for themselves, rather than fear them for their violent side.

⚠️Trigger warning⚠️

Depression, anxiety, mentions of suicide and self harm

Now, Isabel is just a kind and happy girl, but she does have her own hidden issues. She had a history of anxiety and depression before getting captured by Daniela, but now that she lives in the castle it's amplified. Her hands tremor regularly as she works form the amount of anxiety roiling around in her small body. At night she lays awake crying silent tears as she remembers the taste of fresh air and the feeling of sun on her skin. Sometimes she feels as though she no longer remembers what happiness feels like. At one point her thoughts turned to offing herself for some type of relief, but she grew scared and steered away from that thought. Instead she settled for cutting her wrists. She felt relief from being in control of her pain, unlike her time in the dungeons with Cassandra.

End of trigger warning

Uhh, now this is basically just a fic of Elaine and Isabel meeting for the first time lmao

Isabel and Elaine met when Elaine came to visit Alcina and the girls. Isabel had been one of the maids to serve dinner, and she cought Elaine's eye. Elaine was very aware of how the girls "played" with the maids, and though she didn't exactly agree with it, she couldn't really blame them either. They needed blood to survive, after all. However, she noticed the faint tremble in Isabel's hands as she set a plate down in front of her. She also caught sight of a single cut on Isabel's wrist as her sleeve rode up, but it was enough for her. 'Poor thing, she's not doing well here.' Elaine thought. Now, of course most of the maids dont do particularly 'well', in the castle, but Isabel was different. Most maids were hurried and spurred on by fear and resentment. Isabel... Isabel smiled, a genuine smile. Isabel had gentle hands as she worked, she worked with care.

So after dinner was finished and Isabel reached for Elaine's now empty plate to take it to be cleaned, Elaine gently grabbed her sleeve between two fingers. Isabel froze, pale blue eyes snapping to Elaine's in surprise mingled with fear. Alcina perked up at the interaction. It was rare that Elaine payed any mind to the maids.

"What is your name, darling?" Elaine asked softly. Isabel hesitated, seeming confused by the entire situation.

"My- my name is Isabel, my lady." Isabel responded in her soft, silky voice. Elaine smiled gently at the girl, examining her face closely. She was very attractive, Elaine mentally acknowledged as she turned her attention to Alcina.

"I've noticed Isabel here has been quite attentive all night, a very good maid indeed. I was wondering if I may take her home with me." Elaine proposed, trying not to let on how much she wanted to whisk this poor girl away from the castle. Alcina grinned wolfishly as she tilted her head downward slightly.

"Oh? You wish to take her home with you?" Alcina echoed in a suggestive tone. Elaine refrained from rolling her eyes and simply smiled thinly.

"Yes, that is what I said." Elaine replied, the hand gripping Isabel's sleeve moving to cup her elbow instead. Her fingers curled around Isabel's arm in a possessive manner as she maintained eye contact with Alcina. Alcina narrowed her eyes for a moment before chuckling lowly.

"Alright, you can have her. Consider it an early birthday present." Alcina said with a grin, and Elaine nodded in response, turning her gaze to Isabel, who looked rather taken aback by the whole ordeal.

"Go gather your things, we'll be leaving shortly." Elaine murmured softly, rubbing Isabel's arm before releasing her. Isabel stayed rooted to the spot before curtsying and hurrying away.

Once Isabel had finished packing and Elaine said her goodbyes the two soon found themselves sitting across from eachother in Elaine's personal carriage. Isabel kept fidgeting in her seat nervously and Elaine sat in an awkward silence. Out of habit she fiddled with her eye patch and saw Isabel tense. Realization dawned on Elaine like icewater being dumped on her head. 'The poor girl probably thinks I'm going to compel her into having sex with me.' She thought guiltily as she lowered her hand to her lap. She cleared her throat.

"When we get to my estate I shall show you to your chambers and leave you to get settled in. If you need anything you can find me and ask, I'm usually awake at most hours. When I do sleep I sleep light, so don't worry about waking me. I also must warn you about Marcello. He's my raven, and he likes to be a pest most of the time. If he bothers you just shoo him away." Elaine explained, watching Isabel closely. The blond seemed to relax the smallest bit before nodding.

"Yes my lady. Thank you." She murmured softly, and Elaine swore her heart melted at the sound of her voice.

"You may also call me Elaine. I'm not one for titles. Marcello on the other hand, you might need to watch out for." Elaine deadpanned with an eyeroll. Isabel covered a giggle with her hand and Elaine's ego inflated itself at the sound.

"Alright, I'll keep that in mind. Thank you, Elaine." Isabel replied with a soft smile, glancing up at Elaine through her bangs. That was the moment Elaine swore to herself that she'd do anything to see Isabel smile that way.

Suddenly, the carriage came to a halt and Elaine quickly got to her feet. She stepped out into the crisp night air before turning to offer her hand to Isabel. In the dim light she could have sworn she saw Isabel blush as she took Elaine's outstretched hand.

"Well here we are." Elaine announced, gesturing to the dark mansion before the two of them. Isabel stared in wonder at the sheer size of the place. She wondered if Elaine truly lived by herself here. 'If she does it must be rather lonely.' Isabel thought, glancing at the taller woman in sympathy. She was surprised to see Elaine already looking at her. They exchanged awkward smiles before walking up to the mansion together. Little did they know how pivotal that moment was.

[turing-tested]

hey hal its totally okay if you decide to not answer this especially since it can be a pretty sensitive topic...

but stuff has been happening and i just wanted to know how,, like,, you deal with knowing lots of strangers online hate you for things taken out of context or things that everyone knows dont matter half as much as fandom spaces pretend they do. i know what you went through and your experience with being ""cancelled"" was pretty rough but you seem like you at least dont let it affect you anymore... and im sorry if this ask is too personal! please feel totally free to ignore it! but yeah,,, i thought id ask for some advice because i look up to you a lot and i just. idk man. its tough. its taking a lot out of me and i dont know how to deal

ngl, id go on record as saying unfortunately it does affect me to a great extent and I want you to know that 'being accused of and believed to be an evil person' is a horrible thing to experience. it's a hard thing not to internalize. it's hard to get around and commonly we understand that when parents accuse their children of having ulterior motives or being accused of being horrible people by strangers can hurt just as much as those who are close to us. it's a trauma. it can fuck with you and it can leave scars. the human brain and your conceptualization of yourself doesn't live in a vacuum. if you tell a child that they're bad and awful, they'll believe it and it can take years to undo.

I still cry when I talk about it sometimes. and for a long time I couldn't talk about it without shaking and crying always. no amount of 'just don't let it get to you' will fix what I'd consider very much scars that might be excerbated by things that I went through trauma wise as a child.

it hurts and it can suck and you're valid in the way you feel. no man is an island.

the thing that helps me and keeps me sane is talking to my friends, and it's one of the things that helped me most is turning to people who DO know me and care about me and who HAVE seen me at my worst and even then, I don't let on on all the rumination I do and think about and how much I feel like if I was just a better person, I wouldn't have ever had anything mean said about me. you and I both know that people don't need a reason to say things about others that hurt.

so my honest answer is that I'll probably need therapy for what I went through to unpack the incredible damage it did to my self worth. I'll probably need assurances and to talk about it to people I trust for the rest of my life. but it also isn't something that's broken me or made me any less me, I'm just a little more hurt than I was and it's still possible to just keep going, no matter what.

tldr: there's not a fix but I'd suggest focusing on things that make you happy and talking to friends about how it affects you and to a therapist if you have one and to understand that everyone on earth has someone who just doesn't like them and that you can't live your life trying to please someone who will never like anything you do

[letstalkaboutfandomsbaby]

I've been thinking about getting a nip piercing because I think they're neat what's your experience been like?

Hey hun! Overall my experience has been... ehhh sksksk

Lemme explain: this shit fucking HURT. Nipples are much more sensitive than other body parts so the pain you experience is much worse than getting your ears or nose pierced. I was cursing so fucking loud when i got mine done, i was on the verge of tears at the end. Granted i have a pretty low pain tolerance most of the time so maybe it just hurt more for me, but you gotta keep in mind that someone's gonna put a fucking needle through your titty without any numbing agents, you're just gonna have to sit there and take it all as is.

I got my piercing done at a piercing store in a nearby mall (don't come for me, i did my research these ppl are legit sksksk this ain't some claires shit). The women that helped me with paperwork were super sweet and answered all my questions. I was able to get a custom color for my barbells (i got rose gold), and i got my nipples measured before anything else. My size ended up being 3/4 inch, but if my nipples stayed flat and hadn't hardened then i wouldn't have been able to get em, so make sure your nipples can actually perk up before you consider this bc if not you're just gonna be rejected. The total came out to about $100, i dont remember if that was before or after tip tho. My piercer was a gay man and he was super sweet and made me feel very comfortable with the whole experience. He was very kind and understanding when i started cursing up a storm sksksk and he was also very funny, i was very happy with him :)

The night i got my piercing was the worst in terms of pain. I was on the verge of crying all night bc it hurt so fucking bad like obvs it would bc it's a literal wound but all you can do is take pain meds and hope for the best. You have to clean them with saline solution 1-2 times a day for the first few weeks to keep em from getting infected, and you should avoid harsh soaps with fragrances. Unscented baby soap should work just fine, i used a cheap castille soap and it didn't bother me.

Gonna be honest, the pain is unbearable the first month. The first two weeks were a nightmare like wearing a bra hurt, not wearing one hurt, if i ever bumped my titty against something i was in an insurmountable amount of pain, it was not fun sksksk. It's been over a month since i got pierced and even now my nipples can still hurt a shitton depending on how they're resting or if they get snagged on accident. It can take 6-12 months to completely heal, so your titties are gonna be out of commission for a while. Also there's so much fucking scabbing good lord it's so itchy and annoying and if you're a feral lizard like me who can't stop picking scabs then you're gonna have a bad time.

Overall i don't regret the experience. They look super cute, but if i could experience the pain beforehand then i probs would've wimped out and not gotten em. I would take some time to think it over and really consider the pros and cons bc yeah they're cool but your nipples will be aching like crazy for at least a month, do you really wanna go through that? If your answer is yes, make sure you find a piercer that's experienced. Don't go to any random tattoo parlor and ask to get it done. Look at credentials and reviews, call if you have any questions, make sure they sterilize their shit properly and that it's a safe environment to work in. There's a lot of sketchy places out there and the last thing you want is an infection or rejected piercing. Good luck 💕

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Baby Love - Part 10

A/N - Finally an update!! 💕

chrisevans I'm so excited to announce that Y/N and I are expecting!! We are both over the moon.... i cannot even put into words how happy i am right now.

Mama and baby are both doing great and Dodger is thrilled that he's about to become a big brother.

#BabygirlEvansComingSoon

It was a few weeks after the premiere, middle of May, my 5th month in my pregnancy that Chris finally put out the announcement and surprisingly it went well....better than i could ever have imagined. The messages from Chris's fans were amazing! Of course there was still some haters but nothing that was too awful or couldn't be ignored. It was nice that it was out now and i didn't have to worry about someone finding out and leaking it to the press.

Chris was scheduled to start filming 'Defending Jacob' a series for Apple TV mid June through to July. The good thing being it was filming in Massachusetts, 20 minutes from home so he wouldn't have to stay away.

Chris was finally upstairs getting ready so he could head to set, he had been whining this morning about wanting to stay home with his girls.

I was currently laying on the sofa in a sports bra and shorts, with my now 6 month belly showing while i watched some crappy daytime show.... i had removed Chris's t-shirt when i started getting hot flushes.

"Okay im ready to.....go. Jesus christ why are you half naked right now?" I looked round to see Chris looking me up and down like i was the tastiest thing he'd ever seen. I rolled my eyes looking back at the TV "hot flushes, i sweat through my shirt...i feel like I'm burning alive"

"Such a drama queen" he chuckled

"Excuse you?..... you wanna try going through this??" I snapped, i knew as soon as it was out of my mouth it was uncalled for and instantly felt bad "I'm sorry i didn't mean to snap.... is the damn AC even working?" i said almost feeling like i was gonna cry. Chris came walking over crouching in front of me with a cold cloth and draped it across my forehead.

"That should help a little and i got you some ice..." he passed me a cup of ice chips and i cried.

"Hey! Whats wrong?"

"You're just the best boyfriend ever"

"Awww" he chuckled pressing a kiss to my forehead.

"Don't.... I'm all sweaty and gross"

"I like you all sweaty" he wriggled his eyebrows making me laugh "and you're not gross..... you're beautiful. I nearly had a heart attack seeing you laying here looking like this.... now i really don't wanna leave"

"You have to, stop making excuses"

"I dont want to leave you alone like this..."

"I wont be, Scott's coming over we're gonna go for lunch later"

"Oh.... "

"You're okay with that right?"

"Yeah of course" he smiled before leaning in to give me a kiss.

"Hey! its just me!" Scott yelled from the front door on cue.

"In here!" I yelled reaching my hands out to Chris to help me up into a sitting position.

"Yikes! what is going on with you you're a mess" Scott said looking concerned.

"Thanks! Thats just what i needed to hear Scotty" i scooped out an ice chip and popped it in my mouth.

"Hot flushes" Chris told Scott and he pulled a face.

"I'll be okay in a minute, it'll pass. Though im pretty tempted to go jump in the damn pool right about now"

"Stay outta the pool sweetheart, maybe a lukewarm bath or shower would help?"

"I'll be fine Chris, you need to go or you're gonna be late"

"I don't wanna leave you alone...."

"Err hello? Im here, she's not alone" Scott said coming to sit next to me on the sofa.

"Can you put your shirt back on.....i don't feel comfortable...." Chris started to say while looking me over again.

"Stop! I am not putting that thing back on when i feel like I'm in the pits of hell Evans!" I said pointing at the soaking wet t-shirt on the table " besides Scott's seen me in my bathing suit plenty of times.... I'm wearing more now than i was then! also incase you forgot.... I'm not his type"

"I feel insulted!" Scott gasped before smiling at his brother.

"Just go to work! I will call you if i need anything, we'll be fine".

Chris sighed but nodded, he leant in and gave me a kiss and finally left for set.

"Geez he always like that?"

"No, he's got a little more protective as the pregnancy has gone on but that was new"

"He's probably just worried about you. This is the first time he's had to really leave you since you've been pregnant"

"He'll be back tonight! He needs to chill out. I know i sound like a bitch and i really don't mean to but i literally feel like Satan himself is roasting my body!"

"You want some more ice chips?"

"Yes please".

After another 30/40 minutes i finally felt myself cooling down.

"Oh thank god! I think it passed"

"For now"

"Thanks!" I laughed "I've had a few hot flushes here and there but nothing like that... that was brutal!"

"Well I'm glad it passed, why don't you go take a shower and we'll go get some lunch, it will do you good to get some fresh air, we can even take Dodger"

"Sounds good to me".

Scott and i grabbed lunch at a small family run cafe that was kinda tucked away, not a lot of people actually knew about it which was the reason we chose this place when we'd have lunch....it also had a small outside seating area where we could sit with Dodger.

Once we were done with lunch we took Dodger for a walk in the park where he found a new friend, they ran around together for a good half an hour.

"Wow he's gonna be beat" Scott laughed as we sat on a bench watching the two dogs running around.

"Good! He has too much energy!"

I chuckled "i'll be wanting to sleep and he brings me his toys wanting to play its exhausting" i said exaggerating, truth was i loved that Dodger always wanted my attention.

"Well he's gonna have to learn to share you when my niece arrives"

"Do you think he'll be okay with the baby?"

"Im sure he will, Dodge is a good boy"

"The best, i just worry. I worry about everything lately though" i laugh rubbing my hand over my belly "you ready to head back?"

"Sure"

I whistle and call for Dodger and he comes running straight over allowing me to attach he's leash.

"Lets go home bubba" i scratched behind his ear before handing the leash to Scott.

We got back to the house and let Dodger out of the car, he ran straight towards the front door and started growling and scratching at the door.

"Hey stop!" Scott said quickly and Dodger turned to look at him before starting again this time barking loudly.

"Whats his problem?"

"I don't know....."

"Maybe Chris is home?"

"His car isn't here....." i opened the door and Dodger ran inside sniffing everywhere.

"Hey Chris you home?" Scott called out but i already knew he wasn't, this didn't feel right.....

"Scott, somethings wrong....."

"What do you mean?" He asked turning to me looking concerned.

"I don't know its just a feeling i have"

Dodger suddenly ran past us and up the stairs, we followed him up to find him sitting outside mine and Chris's bedroom scratching at the door.

"Chris....." Scott called again thinking Dodger just wanted to get to him but no answer, the house was silent.

Scott stepped forward and opened the door and we both gasped at the what we saw. The whole room was trashed.

"Scott..... what if someones still in the house?" I turned to him with wide eyes as panic set it.

"Stay in here with Dodger, I'm gonna check the house..."

"No! Just call the cops, stay in here with us!"

"I'll be fine! They're probably long gone, Dodger would be going crazy if they were still here...but i just wanna make sure".

"Please be careful! I'll call the cops"

"Okay lock the door behind me".

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier @fairlightswiftly @hiddelstannerbarnes @bellamy-barnes @buchanansebba

Baby love tags @jennmurawski13 @mybabyboytony @ms-betsy-fangirl @vampgirl1997 @ajosieface @afuckingshituniverse @chmedic @esoltis280

@southerngracela @bethabear12 @letsdisneythings @sellulii @katiew1973 @princess-evans-addict

@deidrahouseofpain @siren-queen03 @shipatheart @little-dark-empress @xxloki81xx @lizzyclifford13-blog @booktease21 @lets--be-honest @thevelvetseries @farfromtommy @mery-be @drakelover78