#dont come at me. i dont listen to music. my gf sent me this and then walked into my room and looked at me with a smiley face

[andreabandrea]

yeah i listen to rap

[captainillogical]

Devil’s Ballroom ch.2

A year after the events from the earth’s final attack, Little Homeworld is finally complete, and there’s a new jazz bar where gems and humans mingle and drink. - As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now.

Spinel/Reader

collab with wife @firstofficertightpants

The place actually happened to be like, right on the edge of Little Homeworld. Outside had full glass windows, tall, that reached the ceiling. Inside the lighting was dim, and a bit smokey. You figured it looked alright enough to head in, and gave the bouncer your ID. He nodded and you walked in. It smelt of cigars, and of cinnamon, and it wasn’t entirely unpleasant. A pretty woman in a low-cut red dress was playing the piano on the stage, and it was some contemporary jazz piece. The low murmur of people talking filled the air in between the swells of music, and the place actually seemed busy with people and even gems enjoying themselves. You liked the vibe. It was.. comfortable. At ease. You looked over at the bar, rather than any of the tables, and saw a spot near the end. Perfect. Right by the bathroom. You headed over and plopped down on the stool. There were three empty at the end, so you took the one in the middle, which had the best view of the stage from back here.

While waiting for the bartender to come back down this side, you took the chance to look  at the people around you. A couple familiar faces.. small town you know? And some new ones. New gems too. You can see Mr. Fryman sitting at a table with Kofi and Nanefua, and they look like they’re playing poker. You try not to snicker since Kofi looks absolutely blasted, and Mr. Fryman is cursing up a storm because Nanefua is clearly winning. You see her wink at Mr. Fryman. You suspect a rigged game.

Your phone chimes a couple times. You pull it out of your bag, and check to see who’s bothering you. Ah. The group chat.

    Alex: ughhh you guys my gmas killing me

    Alex: no seriously mexico fucking blows rn 

    Alex: i cant step outside without feeling like my balls are melting off my body

    Alex: and my brother won’t stop listening to the book of mormon soundtrack

    Alex: im going insane

Your friends are so melodramatic. You type out a couple of replies.

    Y/N: You should be used to mexican summers by now, you go every year.

    Y/N: And for the record, your brother is valid. Book of Mormon slaps.

    Alex: what the fuck youre supposed to be on my side u ass

    Alex: i thought our special thing was wicked. OUR SPECIAL THING, Y/N

    Y/N: I’m allowed to like multiple things. Including musicals. 

    Alex: never. fuck you. also what are you even doing rn come play minecraft with me

    Y/N: Yeah as much as I’d like to, I can’t.

“Y/N! So you finally came to see what this place is all about! What can I get ya?” you hear a familiar voice ask. Turning around to face the voice, you see Bismuth wearing her usual overalls and a rather nice looking bow tie. 

“Hey Bis, how’s it going? I like what you’ve done with the place. It’s nice. And uh, I’ll just take a hard cider for now.” You smile at her and set your phone down for a minute.

“Thank you! After we finished Little Homeworld, I had to find something else to focus on in my down time.” She explains while grabbing your drink from the fridge under her side of the bar, and opens it. “So tell me,” She sits the drink in front of you and leans on the counter. “What brings you out here today?”

You take a rather long sip from your drink before meeting the large gems eyes. On the stage, a tall, beardy man replaces the woman that just finished her piece. He immediately starts this jaunty, irish tune. He’s singing loudly, and it’s not bad. A couple of people are clapping to the tune.

“I just really needed to get out.” You replied, taking another sip from your drink. “I was kinda hoping I’d meet someone new, maybe get another friend to hang out with, since my friends wanted to ditch me this summer.” As you’re saying this, more people join the clapping. It’s getting a bit rowdy. “Or maybe at least get drunk enough to forget how lonely I feel.” You add, shrugging. 

“Well, I can supply the drinks, and at least a bit of company.” Bismuth winks, and turns to the patron 6 seats up waving her over. 

You check your phone again, and there’s more from Alex. AND Harper? She must still have phone service wherever she’s at.     Alex: what are u fuckin doin that so important that u cant play minecraft with ur best friend

    Harper: yeah, Y/N. the heck. Also alex, get lost, she’s MY best friend bitch

    Alex: u had ur chances but u left us so we’re a duo now. u can go

    Harper: excuse me!? I WILL end you.

    Y/N: Oh my god, chill. I’m just out right now, so I can’t okay? 

    Y/N: And nice of you to join us, Harper.

    Harper: fuck you I miss you okay. And I miss constant wifi :(

    Alex: OUT!? What do you mean OUT. its night. u play games with ME during this time

    Alex: for real what the fuck are you doing

    Harper: yeah, you don’t go out without us. Wtf are you doing?

    Y/N: I’m at a bar!!     Alex: WHAT

    Alex: dont tell me its the one place that just opened

    Alex: Y/N do NOT betray me you TOLD ME you were gonna go with me!!

    Y/N: I was. But I was also bored and you’re both gone, soooo. 

    Alex: wow

    Alex: i cant believe youve done this to me

    Harper: hmmm. ;)

    Harper: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ;)

    Y/N: What.

    Harper: you tryin to find girls again? 

    Harper: like that one time you went to empire city just to peruse the mall?

    Alex: LMAOOOOO

    Y/N: No.

    Alex: LMAOOOO Y/N GOOD LUCK TRYING TO FIND A GF LOLL

    Y/N: I’m not trying to find a girlfriend you fucks. Christ.

    Y/N: Also Alex, you’re one to talk. You can’t KEEP a girlfriend.

    Alex: ur just mad i have a passionate and intimate relationship w/ my hand

    Y/N: And it will probably stay that way. 

    Y/N: Besides, so far, no one cute here. So it’s a bust.

    Harper: a bust. Lmfao u just outed yourself :)

    Y/N: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

You put your phone down before seeing whatever Alex attempts to reply back with. It sounds like the current boisterous song is coming to a close, and really, most of the people here are clapping along with this guy. It’s fun. And despite the playful ribbing from your shit-talking friends, you’re starting to have a nice time. You finish your drink, and nod over to Bismuth who catches your eye and nods back. You look over onto the stage, the man having cleared the piano, and see Lapis wiping down the piano and seat. Guess he spilled his drink while playing. Lapis, unlike Bismuth, actually dressed up a bit for the job. Her hair was pulled in a cute, small bun, and she was wearing what looks like a tailored tux with no jacket. The vest fit her quite well. She seemed.. happy. Good for her.

No one had taken up the stage again yet, but the place was still lively with chatter. You see someone out of the corner of your eye move towards the stage, but Bismuth comes over again so you tear your gaze away. 

“Another cider? Or do you want something else this time, Y/N? She asks, cleaning a glass with a rag, and moves on to the next one. 

“Ehh, yeah, give me another cider.” You say as you pull out your phone again. Bismuth sets down the drink in front of you.

    Harper: what a goddamn disaster. she got that from me i think

    Alex: no, youre both disasters separately

    Y/N: Fuck you guys. Give me a break.

You hear the piano start to play again, and someone pulling the mic forward. You look up to see pink hair.. And someone kind of familiar. She’s wearing black slacks, a white collared shirt, and suspenders. The shirt is partially open, and you see part of a pink gem showing through on her chest. It looks like she’s got mascara running down her face. 

And then.. she starts to sing. 

It’s lovely. It’s slow and a bit sad, but she seems to be enjoying herself. She’s definitely done this before. Quite a few of the people around quiet down some, so you can hear her pretty clearly. You drink some, and text your friends.

    Y/N: Guys, I lied. There’s a cute gem here who can sing.

    Alex: holy fuk

    Alex: what

    Y/N: She looks kind of familiar though? I can’t quite place it though.

    Harper: dude theres like near 100 gems now in little homeworld lol

    Harper: you’ve probs seen most in passing? :P

    Alex: are you serious Y/N? cant flirt with human women so u turn to aliens? lmfao

    Y/N: Ohhhhh my god. Die.

The gem on stage sings the chorus with gusto - man she’s really getting into this. You’re kind of taken a bit with her performance. It just pulls you. But also.. She really seems familiar now and it’s bothering you.

    Y/N: No I’m serious she seems really familiar and not in that In Passing kind of way.

    Harper: what does she look like?

    Alex: yeah a description would be nice 

    Harper: TAKE A PIC

    Alex: holy shit YES 

    Y/N: I can’t take a pic. She’s too far away, it’ll be blurry.

    Alex: literally just zoom in lord almighty

    Y/N: Okay. Hold on a sec.

You turn on your camera app, and face the stage. Looks like the gem is actually finishing up her song. Perfect, you’ll snap a pic once she stands up. She finishes, and most of the people are clapping for her. You zoom in, and it’s grainy, but decent enough to make out most of her. You snap the pic.

The flash was on.

A couple people turn to look at you, and you try turning away quickly, horrified, and see the gem looking in your direction before walking off into the crowd of people. You cannot imagine a worse scenario. 

    Y/N: FUCK FUCCCCKKKKKK.

    Y/N: (image sent)

    Y/N: I GOT YOUR FUCKING PIC BUT THE FLASH IS ON.

    Y/N: I’M PRETTY SURE SHE SAW THAT IT WAS ME THAT TOOK THE PIC.

With shaking hands, you take another sip of your drink and wait for a reply. Why is life like this.

    Harper: uh.

    Harper: ummm.

    Alex: wait

    Alex: one fucking second

    Y/N: WHY ARE NONE OF YOU CARING ABOUT MY PLIGHT. 

    Y/N: I’M TRYING NOT TO COMBUST ON THE SPOT HERE.

    Alex: shut up for one second

    Alex: harper isnt that

    Harper: uhh. yeah i think so.

    Y/N: WHAT!? WHO IS IT. WHY DOES THAT MATTER AT THIS POINT.

    Alex: lmao i cant believe i have to tell u this

    Alex: bitch do u remember that shit that happened last summer

    Alex: where half the town almost died from that gem shit

    Alex: that’s her     Alex: that’s the bitch who almost killed like, the entire planet

    Harper: you know that night your dad almost died??

As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now. 

[obeymematches]

Hello! I would like to request matchup!

I'm an ambivert girl: i try to be bubbly and kind during the beginning of a relationship in order not to come up too intimidating, but when i start becoming more comfortable i turn out to be a real crackhead and sassy gal. My personality is pretty difficult to describe since i'm very moody and the way i behave depends on my mood. To be honest, i get annoyed really easily but i try not to show it, but when i become mad i can harshly insult and shut the opponent up (yet i always try not to end up in situations like this). I'm pretty talkative once i get to know someone and i deeply care for whoever is close to me and i'm ready to stand by them and side with them 90% of the time. At the same time, i'm also pretty anxious due to some school problems i've had in the past.

As a positive aspect of my personality, i suppose i have a good sense of humor and i manage to make a lot of people laugh by using different approaches to jokes. About those: my favourite humor is either the weird one that makes no sense, sarcasm and also dark humor. I really like aesthetics and aesthetically pleasent things, so i usually try to make my stuff look aesthetic whether it's my room, my page on a social or something else. Also fashion aesthetics is something i really enjoy! Even though i have only two types of clothing: very classy and fancy and street/skater clothes (i dont really know how to define them correctly, my bad)

My hobbies are: gaming, i really enjoy watching gameplays of all games but if i have to play i'd choose strategies, open world rpgs, horror rpgs or co-op games; i like listening to music, my favourite genres being rap, r&b, hard rock and metal (heavy/doom and glam mostly), watching TV is also something i enjoy, especially those weird MTV and TLC programmes 😳 I also love phone pranks and, since we are in such a closed period, zoom meetings' raids.

In the end, i'd like to say that i enjoy spending time with my group of friends, who i count as real friends so the group itself isn't big at all, since i can be myself and relax without thinking too much about making a good impression. These friends are like my squad and gang, that's my impression on my friendships.

I hope this isn't too much information and i'd like to thank you for doing these matchups!!

---------

Hi!! ✨Thank you for sending in a request! I hope you like it!

I wasn’t sure if I should pair you with Belphie or him... because of personality I decided not to go with Belphie, he can be a bit sassy too and that might lead to fights and that’s not too good. It’s more balanced like this I think. But besides that part, the relationship would have lots of similarities with Levi.  

I match you with Leviathan! 

Okay so this is perfect because you are bubbly at first but he is known for having trouble communicating with people he does not know. He would try, yeah, but he is not very skilled. 

However when you become sassy he would start blaming and doubting himself. Like he knew he was going to mess up... you deserve someone better than him anyway... 🥺 

So in that case you’d really have to reassure him that no, it is not because of him, and you really want to be his friend. 

He would be quick to understand you once you have an honest conversation abou it, as he also acts different with people he is not really comfortable with yet. 

You being a good friend would be something that makes him fall for you. Like when he has a confrontation with Mammon, you would be quick to defend Levi and that would make something in him move.  

He would just stand there... staring at you... like he thinks of you as a friend already but atfer this?? 

You’re not kidding right? 

However. He would still not act on his feelings for quite a while. What if that was only because of the situation, and not because you like him? It’d be so lame to ruin his favourite friendship because of a misunderstanding like that. 

You two spend most of your nights together in his room, either you watching him play his favourite game, or both of you playing a co-op game. 

Okay but since you two are into gaming, I bet he would ask you to be his gf/confess in game because he is too nervous to say it out loud even if you are right next to him!

He wouldn’t be like lame or anything about it. He would have this whole situation planned. But it wasn’t as easy as he thought it would be so he abandoned the original plan. So after the two of you defeated a boss, he rather impulsively sent a ❤️ that appeared above his character’s head.

You turned to him, blushing, wanting some kind of explanation or something. 

He was just blushing. He was not going to explain. In fact he almost said that it was an accident, but before he could do that, you quickly sent a ❤️ too. Both of you were quiet for the rest of the night, but after the awkward silence and a heart-to-heart talk (you had to start that) you decided to start dating!  

In this relationship there would be absolutely no judgement. Both of you could be who you really are, and would love each other anyway! 

He would get along with your friends too, anyone you like, he likes. 

[solange-lol]

Yellow, purple?

Yellow: 

if you could have any view from your bedroom window what would you choose?:

probably the city??? idk i feel like that would be super cool. or something that is Not the trees outside my room that i have a crippling fear that they will come crashing down on my bedroom one day

what’s your favorite thing to do on a sunny day?

read!!!!!!! inside or outside i love it!!!!!!! or write/draw if i have inspiration 

what do you consider lucky?

i have the immune system of a GOD the only really bad sickness i had was when i got strep throat once. unless ur saying what like,,, physical things i consider lucky which i dont really have a lucky anything

what made you smile today?

my gf sent me a goodnight text and it was really sweet :)) 

what makes you happy?

i have an entire list in my notebook but right now im wearing a bright ass rainbow striped shirt that makes me look like a clown and seeing everybodies double take is just really making my day

Purple:

what’s your astrological sign? 

libra!

what’s the best piece of advice you ever received? 

its not really advice but i was watching an interview with chris colfer talking about how he followed his dream and made it as an author as much as he did as an actor and he basically said that the reason we create is to share something with the world, and if you have an idea  its not you who needs the world to listen but its the world that needs to listen to you and ive been thinking about that a lot i guess

when’s the last time you followed your instincts?

when i took a test on a book i didnt read and only knew the basic plot of. ended up getting an A- which pissed off a lot of people

what’s your favorite food?

chocolate is my fricken kryptonite man. the only thing that keeps me away is when theyre filled with fruit syrup or whatever

what’s your secret dream?

i would LOVE to be in a musical of some sort but unfortunately i cant act or sing

thank you so much!! send me a color :) 

[taesamorcito]

What’s your love story with your gf if you don’t mind me asking?

anon this is going to be long because i never get to tell the story or talk about my relationship since me and my gf aren’t out yet :( don’t worry i’ll add a tl;dr at the end in case you wanted the short version

so we met in uni, we shared a few classes at the end of 2015 but truly got to know each other during the second half 2016 because shared almost every class during that semester. She was really easy talk to and really friendly and funny and so smart so i was always asking for help in class :( we started hanging out more often and i saw her every day so i kind of started liking her but didn’t want to admit until she got a boyfriend and that felt :/// that happened in september/october idr, but i do remember i always got mad when she cancelled plans with me to be with him or like got really sad or uncomfortable would bring up the subject :( so by now i knew i liked her but just brushed off as a simple crush. 

Fast forward to summer 2017 january i came out to her while i was drunk lmao i sent her multiple texts saying that i was bi that i was sorry and if she didn’t want to be my friend i understood it and blah blah blah, i didnt tell her i had a crush on her tho!! she replied the next morning saying she was okay with it that i shouldn’t be apologizing and that it was really (tbh i was too embarassed to even read it so idk what else was there) i just told her “let’s forget abt this pls” and we did, we didn’t mention it ever again lmao So idk when but thing started to change when classes started in march again we didn’t have classes together so i didn’t see her a lot in uni but i visited her house quite often and things started to change . she was always very touchy but now she held my hand more often or if we were watching movies she would cuddle with me it was really nice, but it just fueled the crush i had :(( 

MAY 2017 her birthday came and she had a party obviously her bf was there :) this is where i knew that it was more than a crush because i remember that when i saw them kissing my heart really fucking hurt even though i was drunk, later that night he went home and i stayed over with other friends and for a few minutes we cuddled a bit while sleeping and that just felt so perfect :((( but it didnt last long because one friend was so drunk he wouldn’t shut up and we had to calm him down. so now i KNOW im in love with a straight girl with a bf

JUNE 2017 all the cuddling and hand holding and hugs and touchy acts were starting to get to me on one hand it felt nice and wonderful and perfect on the other she still had a bf and for me she was in love with him so :/// i was determined to put some distance between us so one saturday night my parents were out of town and i invited some high school friends over and got really really really drunk and i just texted her “hey im sorry but i need to stay away from you” or smth and she called because she wanted to know why or what had happened i couldn’t fucking talk to her, words literally wouldn’t come out of my mouth and all i could say was “you don’t realize?” (TALK ABT DRAMATIC) she got frustrated with me and said “i wanted to fix this but if that’s what you want ill give your space” MY DRUNK ASS THEN THOUGHT IT WAS A GREAT IDEA TO TELL HER THE REASON BEHIND AND JUST CONFESSED VIA TEXT it said smth like “i like you but i know you dont because you have a bf and that’s okay but i really need to forget abt you so i need space” she answered the next morning saying she was surprised but now understood better and she will give me the space i needed but if i promise i would go back to being her friend after, i was too embarassed and was kind of short with my answers and the whole thing ended up in bad terms that day

destiny was a fucking bitch because the next day and the following days i kept running into her at uni and it was so awkward  we both didnt know what to do :/ three days later she texted me if we could talk and i agreed and she cried bc she didn’t know what i expected her to do if i wanted her to ignored me completely or if a hi was okay and i just didnt know how to handle everything and at the end we agreed no contact or speaking but that lasted like a day because i thought everything over that night and realize that i was being a selfish idiot and that the situation was making everything worse because now i thought about her even more and just wasn’t working as i thought. we talked the next day and i asked her if we could forget abt everything and just act normally BUT BEFORE THAT AKSCLNAS i asked her to tell me that she’ll never see me like more than a friend and that she loved her bf she did and then we agreed to forget abt this

the following days were so awkward for me because i was so embarrased abt this whole fiasco but she didn’t let me avoid her lmao and well she was extra touchy now i remember that not long after we got back too being in good terms we took a cab to her house and during most of the ride she was hugging me or holding my hand she says it was bc she wanted everything to go back to normal.

JULY 2017 my favorite month sooooo she and her bf started having problems (i think this started months before but i was just finding out because of our mutual friend) and our cuddling and hand holding had increased a lot :( one night we were skyping and her mom comes in and she mentions smth abt her bf being in the past and i was just :O but didnt say anything until the next day and she confirmed it, she said the feelings just weren’t there and that she had tried to break it up much sooner but he asked for a second chance but at the end it wasn’t fair for either of them to continue so she ended it, i told her i was sorry to hear that and didnt really talk abt it that much, days passed and midterms started and i had trouble with this particular course so i asked her if i could sleep over her house and stay up studying she agreed and well KCLKCNANCANCM it was late like past midnight almost 1 am and i wasn’t getting any of the stuff she was tired so we kinid of said fuck it. she turned off the lights and i was just messing around with the music from her lap we both layed down and obviously she cuddled and i tried to distract myself changing the music  but i could feel her face really close like realllyyyyyy close so i turned my head and i could feel how close our lips were but i quickly turned back to looking at the laptop because i thought it was an accident but she didnt move and i turned my head again and i could see she was awake but didnt move away so i did lmao i was so fucking nervous and i turned again to see her reaction but this time she kissed me!!!! it was so soft and tender and just magical it was an undescrible feeling still one of my favorite moments ever :( after that she just smiled  and said “let’s sleep” so i closed the laptop and hug her and tried to sleep but i couldn’t because i didnt know what it meant or what she expected from me or if she even liked me dkascla next morning was cute too we were woken up by a noise and she just got closer to me and gave me a small peck on the lips and went back to sleep and i just died again and held her closer and went back to bed 

we talked abt it days later lmao midterms ended and there was a party and after it i slept over her house and just drunkly asked her if this was a game or just smth she was curious abt or why she had kissed me that day, she said she liked me :D and that this wasn’t a game and i told her ok let’s talk more when im not this drunk mvlmsnackjc we dated for months but we count as part of the relationship and  i finally asked her to be my gf in november 2017 after giving her a cd with all the songs i listenned since i knew i liked her aslcnscncl dumb i know but in that moment i thought it would be cute and i also gave her this necklace i used as a charm 

now she’s in this uni program that’s really good for her career but it involves her being in another continent for a year, she left in march 2018 but came to visit in august !!!! and still has a few days until she has to go back but will come for a few days for christmas and then she’ll be back in march for good nnckascnaskcnasnd  it’s hard but i love her and wouldn’t change any of it 

TL;DR we met in uni, i liked her, she had a bf, i confessed while drunk, she said it was okay but only saw me as a friend, broke up with her bf, kissed me and now we’ve been together for a year and 2 months

[theday]

u only stan 3 groups yet i'm gonna break barriers and say red velvet.. also day6 but i know my priorities

softshouyous said to wormbebe: red velvet???? 2x?? 

idk why you put 2x falen but i thought u knew what boxy sent me and i lost my mind 

also @ boxy i answered day6 here! thank you both for asking ily 

send a group!

My first bias: wendy bc i watched this unhelpful guide and was like wrow her english

Your current bias and why: yeri her short hair im cyring.... im cryign.. blood shes so pretty listen i dont know anything about rv but shes so dhjdhsh gargled noises i want a gf

Favourite song: red flavour and peekaboo 

Favourite MV: peekaboo i wish i was that pizza guy god

OTP: im not informed enough to answer this

Member you think has the best smile: all of them i love gorls

Favourite choreography: me, looking from side to side because i dont know any dance other than peekaboo and bad boy: :) all

Favourite era: the two latest comebacks.. hOoo boy can they come 2 my house nd murder me

Do you own any merchandise: love from the sidelines

Have you seen them live: on music shows through streams lol xd

Favourite voice/singer: idk hjdfhhdjjhd i cant differentiate their voices im a fake fan

Favourite dancer: miss seulgi (which i keep reading as luigi) i watched the i need u dance cover and fell in love

HWWGSGH BAD BOY JUST SATRTED OLPAYUFD???? ON AUTOPLAY WHY I WAS LISTENING TO CHICO WITH HONEYWORKS HJHHSH???? rv propaganda damn .. bad boy actually slaps

[playfullywitty-signoff]

I was tagged by @sh00t Thanks babe.

I tag anyone who wants to do this, because I’m lazy and tired.

1. last drink: Green Tea 2. last phone call: my Mom  3. last text message: My boss, asking her for some info 4. last song you listened to: Havanna Cover by Our Last Night 5. last time you cried: Probably... i dunno. 6. dated someone twice? kind of? 7. kissed someone and regretted it? yes ( I’M GAY PEOPLE!) 8. been cheated on? emotionally, yes. 9. lost someone special? Yep. 10. been depressed? yes 11. gotten drunk and thrown up? Holy Crap. Yes.

fave colors: 12. dark purple 13. dark red 14. army green in the last year have you… 15. made new friends? i guess? 16. fallen out of love? nope 17. laughed until you cried? Heck yeah. 18. found out someone was talking about you? Yeah, because my two boss-people were talking about me. I NEED A RAISE; PEOPLE! 19. met someone who changed you? yes. duh. 20. found out who your friends are? My friends are aliens. 21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list? I dunno. Let me check xD Probably not though. I’m never on facebook so I haven’t added any friends in years. general 22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl? what do you count as real life? Have I talked to them on the phone? Then : all of them. 23. do you have any pets? Jup. They’re stupid. 24. do you want to change your name? Nah, I’d get confused. 25. what did you do for your last birthday? Ate at my favorite Vietnamese Place with my family and went on a nice long horse ride with a friend. 26. what time did you wake up today? 6 am. 27. what were you doing at midnight last night? sleeping. 28. what is something you can’t wait for? March. Seeing my GF. For my horse insurance to kick in.(See babe. You’re the first thing!) 30. what are you listening to right now? Shitty music from the pub downstairs. 31. have you ever talked to a person named tom? Yes. 32. something thats getting on your nerves? Life, tbh. 33. most visited website: Youtube.                                                                          34. hair color: Brown. 

35. long or short hair: I have like... middle length hair? 36. do you have a crush on someone: my gf.

37. what do you like about yourself: I have lots of stupid animals.

38. want any piercings? Yep 39. blood type: Why do you need to know that? Do you want my organs? If so: A- 40. nicknames: Nemo. Dumbass. Schnele. Nel. Neler. 41. relationship status: My gf finally sent in her application. So I’ve got one of those. 42. zodiac: Pisces 43. pronouns: she/her 44. fave tv shows: Person of Interest, Leverage, Burn Notice, White Collar 45. tattoos: Have some, want more. 46. right or left handed: right 47. ever had surgery: yep. 48. piercings: none 49. sport: I.. don’t play any sports atm.. 50. vacation: Like. where I wanna go? Where I’ve been? First England. Then the rest of the world 51. trainers: Do I... wanna marry them? no. Do I have some? Yes. Did I eat them? ... maybe? more general 52. eating: nothing 53. drinking: green tea 54. I’m about to watch: my life go by. 55. waiting for: March 17 56. want: to go to bed and sleep. 57. get married: Sure. I need someone who will help me take care of my animals. 58. career: I would like one of those. which is better 59. hugs or kisses: hugs 60. lips or eyes: eyes 61. shorter or taller: I dont care. 62. older or younger: My gf is going to kill me if I say older. So like. younger? Same age? Older? I don’t care. 63. nice arms or stomach: arms all the way 64. hookup or relationship: relationship 65. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant have you… 66. kissed a stranger: yes 67. drank hard liquor: yep 68. lost glasses: I don’t wear glasses. 69. turned someone down: yes 70. sex on first date: ... yes. 71. broken someone’s heart: How the fuck would I know? 72. had your heart broken: Jup. 73. been arrested: no 74. cried when someone died: yes 75. fallen for a friend: Jup do you believe in 76. yourself: no. who would do such a thing? 77. miracles: nah, dude.  78. love at first sight: I’m as dumb as a pile of bricks when it comes to like love and shit. So nope.  79. santa claus: no 80. kiss on a first date: yes 81. angels: no other 82. best friends name: Anna 83. eye color: blue 84. fave movie: Deadpool 85. fave actor: I dunno. Like. Sarah Shahi? Gal Gadot? Any woman who can punch me in the face.

[kandjimagines-blog]

runnin’ late // (j.c imagine)

Anonymous said: can you do a jc one from today's video we're the reader is his date? maybe gf that the fans don't know ab?

    I get a snapchat from Jc, I open it and I see a picture of him in a mirror, he captioned it, “Just getting hype to see my best girl.” I smile a little as I reply to him, sending a picture from my eyes up, “You look goooood tho.” Jc and I have gone on about five or so dates, he’s a really reliable and fun-loving dude, adventurous and funny too. I really do like him and he texts me, “I’m shooting a video with my friend, wont take more than maybe fifteen minutes, cant wait to see u.” I’m sat on my couch in my apartment, already ready for our date, Jc volunteered to pick me up and I text him back, “Cant wait lol” I sit on my phone scrolling through Instagram and I see Jc left a comment on one of my photos, “Whatta babe.” I blush and like his comment, standing up to get myself a snack to pass the time while waiting.

     Fifteen minutes passes and I text Jc my address and I get no reply, I figure he must already be on his way here and just doesn’t wanna text while he drives. I throw away the remains of my snack away and I start pacing, Jc hasnt sent me any snapchats either, we started doing this thing where we send each other snaps when we’re listening to really cringey music while driving, it sounds lame but it always makes me laugh seeing his snaps. I’m not quite worried but it isnt like him not to be texting me, I shrug, taking advantage of the moment and fixing my hair, looking in the mirror and admiring my outfit, I really did go all out for this date, reservations at a cool restaurant and everything, I’m just excited to hang out with him though, I cant hide my feelings for him and he knows that.

      An hour passes and now I’m upset, more annoyed than anything and I text him, “dont even bother showing up now, lol.” Twenty minutes later and I get a notification from him, “omg I’m so sorrryyy, my friend hid my phone from me and I just now found it.” I reply with “okay.” and he calls me but I decline it and he texts me, “im coming over, ik i fucked up.” I leave him on read, ten minutes later and he’s at my door, looking apologetic, “Hey-” “Jc I’m pissed at you, you shouldn’t have come over.” He sighs, “My friend stole my keys, wallet, and phone, I had to find the key to this lockbox they were in, in this fucking hide-and-seek game-” “It’s okay.” He grabs my hand, “It’s not okay, I ruined our dinner, our entire night.” He looks genuinely apologetic and I kiss his forehead, “It’s alright.” He sighs, “My friend owes me big time.” “Why’s that?” “Because he ruined my chances with you.” I laugh as I shake my head, “Not at all, nothing’s ruined...well, nothing other than our reservation at least.” He laughs a little, I pull him by his jacket, “Come inside, we can still hang out.” He wraps his arms around me, kissing my cheek, “You’re the coolest girl I’ve ever met.” “Thanks.” He sits with me on the couch, his hands on my face as he kisses me, my arms around his waist, pulling him closer and closer.

[incendavery]

gosh, thank you! that is so sweet??? I hope you (and any other of my followers who celebrate!) have/had a very happy Eid!💖 💕

on another note, I’ve finally gotten around to cleaning out my askbox! under the cut is almost every ask I’ve gotten that i haven’t answered in the past.... I’m not sure. it’s been a WHILE though.

as a warning, there’s all sorts of stuff, and it’s all untagged! also also, if you sent one of these asks and want me to remove it, just let me know!

yes!! @fuckaspunk IS super sweet and talented and i AM very lucky to have them! and I’ve heard from reliable sources that the feeling is mutual~~💕

i’m glad my comics make you feel less alone; that’s a rough situation you’re in. i really hope you find yourself in a better environment soon!

thank you!!!💕

thank you for understanding! and yes, aidan is a huge help to me??? even when they’re not answering asks, they’re always supporting me in some way, whether that’s making sure I’ve eaten enough, or talking me through my anxiety, or all the other ways they’re there for me every single day💕💕

ok, my tips are!!:

draw as much as possible! even if it’s just lines and shapes with no meaning, you’re still developing your hand/eye skills

BUT: dont draw if you’re not feeling it! if you’re feeling fried, it’s better to take a break. go on a walk to somewhere scenic, read your favorite book, listen to some new music, hang out with friends, or just take a nap! rest up and find some inspiration! you can come back to your sketchbook when you feel energized again

draw stuff that you like! you’ll improve way faster if you’re passionate about what you’re doing

look at art you like with a critical eye. try to examine the different components and figure out what you think works or doesn’t work. try incorporation those components into your own work

read a lot of tutorials and other resources, but take what they say with a grain of salt

ultimately, remember that the only real rule to drawing is that doing it should make you happy

good luck!! i do my best not to pick, but it’s a real struggle; i have lots of scars from it too. ;v; im cheering for you!!!

ALWAYS!!!! if you do, please show me!! my notifications get real busy, but anyone is welcome to IM me any time!

thank you! i actually get very worried about my style; i tend to admire artists with complex linework and delicate shading, so i often feel my style is far to simple! so thank you!!

that is really high praise????? gosh??!?!?!? best of luck with the next three years; i hope you grow to be someone you like even better than me!

thank you!!

peanut time is the best!! i haven’t gotten to do a proper one in a while though ;-; i’ve mostly been feeding the crows on my way back home from night shifts, when i give them the reject eggs from the continental breakfast.

wow, neat!! chickens are so wonderful; i cont wait until i can have some of my own :>

dont be nervous! i know i can be hard to get ahold of over the internet (bc i get overwhelmed easily) and hard to talk with irl (bc i get so nervous and interacting w ppl doesn’t come naturally to me AT ALL) but honestly i?? love making new friends??!

thank you!!? im thankful every day that someone as radient as aidan is in my life for the long haul

thank you!!!!!!!💕

i completely feel that? its ok to hit rough patches! just do your best!!

i dont remember what i felt bad about but THANK YOU💕💕

honestly its done me worlds of good to share my art?? hearing people talk about how they go through all the same shit i do makes me feel so much less alone, especially on the toughest days! so i guess thank you, and thank you?

youre welcome!!!! :>

huh!! i dont know much about shoegaze (other than thinking abt that post abt the guy who pronounced it like fugazi I THINK ABT THAT EVERY TIME) but thats real neat!! im glad youve found something that works for you!!

hey, neat middle name! and youre very welcome; i hope things have been looking up for you since you sent this?💕

i dont remember when this was from but im currently doing really well with my meds!! i switched to a combination of lexapro in the morning and benadryl in the evening, and its been working super well!✨

thank you??!! ;o; i would love to see all your favorite birds!!

hey, right back atcha!!!

:0

ty!!!

hey. thank YOU

you’re absolutely not bothering me! thank you so much!!

!!!!!!!!!!

hey, nice! im glad you like both me and my music!

gosh thanks?!?!

she is the most beautiful and handsome!!!!!!!!!!!! i love her! thank you from both of us!!!!

aw, gosh! im sure i like you too!!

this was from.... A WHILE AGO.... but youre welcome?? i just wish i could have done more

hey, thank you so much!!!!!

thank YOU and a very very belated merry christmas!!!

that does make sense!! reconciling friendships and crushes is tricky business. the best i can say to you is to be as honest and open with each other as you can

i dont personally get those, but ive heard of people experiencing them as a sideeffect when coming off or switching meds

i think these two are part of the same message? but oh man yeah that sucks when ppl are misgendering you AND hitting on you at the same time. on a different note, ive never heard of using a corset to stim before! neat!

i mean, 1. depression doesn’t care if you have a “””good””” reason and 2. ive literally never met anyone w depression (including myself) who thinks that they do have a “””good””” reason for having it. thats the insidious part of depression, is that it makes you think that theres nothing wrong and that its all just you not measuring up in some way

so i guess that would make you.... someone with depression?

real BAD

💕 💖 💞  💓  💗

not yet haha THANK YOU

hey, im glad you like it!! since this blog has gotten so big, its kinda my happy place to be? (for anyone wondering, my reblog blog/personal is @spinels!

that IS a fun fact!! thank you!

it’s absolutely ok! i get a little bitter when people take my work WAY out of context (for example, straight people removing the caption that says “im just really gay” before tagging their bf/gf) but i am 100% ok and happy with people relating to my work in a different way than i intended (ex: a comic i made about being ashamed of my derma getting reblogged by someone struggling to be ok w their visible burn scars)

hoo gosh, thank you!!

glad to have you here!! im glad people can relate to some of the weirdly specific shit i write about tbh???

i’m sorry its taken so long for me to get back to you; that a terrible situation

if you have a teacher you trust, i would absolutely bring it up to them. that is 100% not an ok thing for those kids to be doing. at all.

im glad you at least have your friends that support you! 

:0 WAIT is this someone i know through ucsc?? :0 :0 :0

HA 

aaaa thank you! that is high praise ;v;

i have no words; this is such a touching message. thank you so much ;v;

this is belated but!! the main creative community i can recommend is kzsc, the radio station! i had a real cool time there, and its a great way to make friends and connect with ppl of all sorts! :0

yeah, its totally normal! ive had roommates ive been super tight with, and roommates who i barely ever hung around with. its natural! i doubt you’ll finish college w/o finding a roomie that you get ~The Roomie Experience~ with though, even if its like a housemate or s/t!! ;0

i’ve never been told that, actually! neat!! (and wow?? i cant believe i inspire ppl.... wow......... what a concept tbh??)

oh yikes... i do hope youre feeling better :( im glad my comics can help a little bit at least!

💕 💖 💞  💓  💗!!!

HUGS

i dont remember what this was in reference to, but good to know?

also good to know!?

i think the crows and jays do! i dunno about the squirrels and other birds. and thank you!!

the youth gang..... i love it..... how good???!

i wrote about getting yuri right here! he’s a southern alligator lizard and i love him to bits. 

heres a pic of the Long Boy doin his thing:

hey neat! i’m glad youve chosen a lame you can be proud of!!💖

ive never heard of that!! wow

what play is this?? :0 :0 :0 im so curious now!!

oh SHUCKS...,,,,,,,,,, ;v;

hahahaha omg thank u

i dont actually have any more of them interacting, unfortunately! the owl isnt one specific person, like a lot of my characters are meant to represent. the owl more represents as a whole all the people i run into in my life that i am very very gay for.

thank you!!!

youre very welcome! im glad you feel better!!!!

aaa gosh thank you!!!

hhhhfgh ive gotten less of it recently BUT YEAH that was bad times™️ 

thanks for the info!!! :0

no problem! a lot of the credit honestly goes to @fuckaspunk, who is always keeping me updated on that sort of stuff.

i didn’t know that! a lot of the symbolism seems to come from multiple sources sometimes, from what ive seen?

aaaa gosh omg thank you ;v;

aw thank you???!!

nice!!! oct 24 bdays go!!!

thank you!! it really does mean a lot actually!!!!!!!

of course?? antisemitism cant be ignored in this fight

aw, thats so cute! id love to hear what headcanons you have tbh???

hey thanks?! this is really cool to hear, tbh. i try to be positive most of the time, but im not going to like,,, kid myself when im not feeling it and im glad that other people can appreciate that too, ya know?

wow!!

(this one!) thank you i love that one too???!

hey, im glad you found your way here!! thank you so much!!!

aaaa ty! 

hmmm i have two leopard geckos, and they made very good beginning lizards for me and aidan! but i would maybe ask someone a bit more experienced than me, like @kaijutegu​ or @wheremyscalesslither​!!

thank you!!

one day at a time! (but seriously, thank you!!)

yummy yummy sauce...... ty!!!

awww, gosh! thank you!?

AAAA TY BOTH I GET SO SELF-CONSCIOUS ABT MY VOICE,,,,, ;o;

:0 i havent watched that, but it sounds rly cool!!

i like that fun fact a lot! ty!!

pae stands for paerlin, which is what @fuckaspunk​‘s internet handle used to be! i used it to refer to them on my blog in secret back when they still didnt know i had a crush on them.... ;//v//;

aaaaa thank you!!!  ;o;

nice nice nice ty!!

>:0 get back down here!! (jk that’s rly neat! highfive!!) 

those are all good words that i like!! thank you!!!!

i dont know anything about him, but i looked him up and i guess i can see it?!

@fishcrow is really cool! ive never really interacted with them, but im p sure were mutuals...? anyway yeah their comics are rly cute and cool!

that is me! thank you; i hope things go well for you as well!

hello to you too!

aaaa ty!!! tbh the number of nice anons i get way way way outnumbers the mean ones <3

thank you! thank YOU for existing!

:0 chocolate croissant, here i come!!!

thank you!!!!!!💕

its literally my pleasure!!!

aaa ty!!! 💕💕

hehe im glad! 

sldf;j;sfjdklfdslfjs thank you so much?????? what a compliment omg gosh

yeah!! i have a hard time on settling what class id be, but i feel like id be a heart player! 

ohh um! im not sure which pens youre referring to, but if you mean the ones I use for my comics, i color them with Winsor & Newton ProMarkers, and I do the lines with a purple fine-point Sakura Gelly Roll Classic pen! i also use micron pens of all different sizes and colors in some of my non-diary comic art!

aww thank you so much!!

:0 :) :0 !!!!!!

ty!!! ive grown to love him very much as well!!

thank you! i hope you are doing well also!!

i love them very much?!! id put a picture but i dont have one with all four of them so instead imagine me lying on the floor crying abt how much i love them bc thats me basically every day

you dont mean......

?!?!?!?!?!?!

awwww ty!!!

HEY WOW

aaa gosh thank you!💕

DOUBLE FOLLOW

gay dragons combine the best of both very good things: gay and dragons. im glad you appreciate them w me tysm ;v;

aaa what a lovely message! ty💕

3rd-shift-working, depression-having, corvid-loving solidarity fistbumnp!!!!

huh! ive never heard of that; ill check it out maybe!!

ah im really glad? tysm!!💕

my understanding is that it helps people who have text-to-speech readers? but im honestly not as well informed on that as i should be! 

hell yeah!!!! 

gosh!!!!!

hnmngnhng youve probably already made a decision but i just gotta say.........shadow rulez

delicious!!

i havent!! i really want to though!

oh man ALL THE TIME. i usually try to either reality check with someone i trust, or to do an activity thats easy and i know i can do, or both!

i love andre and karl!!! its actually a huge influence on me and my art tbh??? 

i had a good (and safe) trip! ty!!!

hey, thank you!!!

oh jeez thats bad :( i think this was in response to when i needed to wait between med refills?

i cant give a precise reason, tbh! when it comes to whats lucky, i just sort of.... go with my gut, ya know?

thank you!! 👍

that sure sounds like insomnia! its almost hard for me to say tbh, bc ive had trouble sleeping for as long as i can remember, so NOT having trouble sleeping is bizarre and unrealistic to me haha... but i think the bottom line is, if its interrupting your daily routine and making it hard for you to have enough energy, then its something you should look into remedies for!

:0 :0 :0

ohhh how nice! ill give it a try! :>

omg,,,, nope, just me!

thank you!!!!!!

honestly? thats such a good way to look at it i love the idea of my blog as a big zine

always!!!!! go for it!!!

hey, thank you so much!!!!!

omg, thats so great! thank you!

im so glad; thank you!!!

thank you so much!💖 (and mexico, neat! i love hearing where people are following from??)

aaaaaaaaaaaa ;//v//; thank you??? i get so happy whenever ppl tell me they like my singing aaaaaaa

aw, hey, no worries! money is all well and good, but in some ways, messages like this mean just as much!

its cool that comic gave you plural feels! im def not a system though :> 

its tricky, isnt it? i still feel like im no good at it lmao

LISTEN,,, there is a 99.9999% chance i wont notice, and a 100% chance i wont judge. reblog away! 

THANK YOU ARENT THEY THE BEST I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

thank you!! i hope you have a good day as well!

aaa ty!!💖

aa ty! (what a cool name!!! im kind jealous ngl!)

awww thank you💖

i do my best! i just worry when im not active, bc i tend to connect my self-worth to my output (;^; )

aaaaa ty!! 💖

!!!!!!!!!!!! omg wow i love being called a pretty boy???? ty???????

hey, neat! crow high-five!

aw, thank you!!! 💖

im doing my best! thank you so much, messages like this really help when im in a place like that tbh ;v;

gosh this is so sweet? thank you so muhc !!?

thank you all!! im sorry that saying thank you over and over sounds so repetitive, but i truely do mean it for every one of you!!!

i am..... one of those things!

well thank you!!

ohoho~✨

thank you! and honestly im sure it does??

hey, cool! good for you!!!!!!! and ty!!

aw gosh thank you!💖

hey, wow! thats super cool; thank you so much!

(i dont follow the first person i followed on tumblr anymore.... they became a hockey blog rip haha)

aaaah, thank you so much!!

almost???

i do!! drunken lullabies is an absolute banger!!!!!!!!!!

i am!!!! thank you!!

aw, ty!!! 💖

hee hee, thank you! 

my biggest tip honestly?? have someone who can be by your side to help you with... basically everything... during your recovery. bc trust me, i was n o t  a v a i l a b l e. i spent a lot of my recovery playing 2048 at the same time as watching tv, bc doing both at once distracted me from how much the bandages itched.

thank you!! (i think this was in reference to getting top surgery!)

how shitty??????? yikes. i hope your supervisor has your back??? bc wow????

hey!!! thank you!!! i draw all my comics traditionally on paper! im not sure what you mean by the writing though? if you mean the word bubbles, i do those by hand on paper too!

I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND THAT FEELING,,,, im so happy ppl talk to me, but i get really nervous about saying the wrong thing. 

when i’m down, i usually crave validation. i like being reminded about things ive done right! i also like gentle reality checks, like, ‘hey: this is the situation, this is what we can do about it. ok? ok’

i unfortunately dont have any!! i had a couple at one point, but they’ve since been lost to the depths of my old laptop. and hey, thank you so much!!

now thats a nifty trick!! im terrible at telling all my white tablets from each other lmao

!!!!!!! ITS ME!!!!!!!!

maybe you just need some space? i know i sometimes temporarily block people i know, if i need some private space or if i dont trust myself to keep cool and solve problems constructively. do what you need to do to feel at ease, and go from there, ya know?

thank you!!!

its,,,, up somewhere above in this monster post lmao i,m so sorry,,,,

thank you so much!!!

WOW NO WORRIES??,,,,,,,,, INCREDIBLE 10/10???????

all four of these came right after i gave myself a hair cut and THANK YOU SO MUCH??? i live for validation and it feels so good to have my actions affirmed ;o;

[verbumdilecti]

All the questions

I welcome death :))

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?ella2. Are you outgoing or shy?depends3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?ella, my parents, jordan4. Are you easy to get along with?depends lol5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?yes6. What kind of people are you attracted to?apparently I have a thing for brunettes. but it depends... personality wise7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?I hope so, yes8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?um. I babysat for my sister so my brother in law?9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?depends on who im talking to10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?ella11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?“it autocorrected)12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?only the wild ones - dispatchkept woman - fleet foxesperfect places - lordenancy from now on - fjmtime is dancing - ben howard

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?i mean it depends but yeah14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?maybe? idk15. What good thing happened this summer?ella’s parents like me and they talked about when I become a music teacher which means they think well stay together and that just makes me really happy16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?yes17. Do you think there is life on other planets?yes18. Do you still talk to your first crush?god no19. Do you like bubble baths?yeah :)20. Do you like your neighbors?I don’t really know them21. What are you bad habits?picking my skin. especially the bottom of my feet. they havent healed since before january22. Where would you like to travel?so many places, but right now the south pacific and greece23. Do you have trust issues?oh yes24. Favorite part of your daily routine?facetiming ella when we go to bed25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?my stomach26. What do you do when you wake up?check my phone, text ella, attempt to go back to sleep lol27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?darker but like. when I tan I tan kinda like... Mediterranean if that makes sense (I think it’s jewish genes?) but I wanna be like that all the time not just in the summer28. Who are you most comfortable around?ella, my dad, jordan29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?no30. Do you ever want to get married?yes31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?yes32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?none? idk33. Spell your name with your chin.leah34. Do you play sports? What sports?not really but I used to play softball until I quit35. Would you rather live without TV or music?TV36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?yes 37. What do you say during awkward silences?nothing... or too much38. Describe your dream girl/guy?my gf39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?candy stores and cute book/art stores40. What do you want to do after high school?go to college for music education41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?depends42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?im sad, thinking, dissociating, or angry43. Do you smile at strangers?yes44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?space45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?idk tbh46. What are you paranoid about?a lot of things... right now someone breaking into my house47. Have you ever been high?no48. Have you ever been drunk?yes49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?yeah50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?purple51. Ever wished you were someone else?sometimes52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?anxiety53. Favourite makeup brand?I don’t wear makeup a lot54. Favourite store?annie blooms55. Favourite blog???? I like a lot... anything with a nice soft aesthetic

56. Favourite colour?lavender or turquoise57. Favourite food?mac n cheese or olives58. Last thing you ate?mac n cheese lol59. First thing you ate this morning?bacon60. Ever won a competition? For what?yes. I won a national award for community service. that’s the only one that comes to mind?61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?nope62. Been arrested? For what?nope63. Ever been in love?right now64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?my first kiss ever was in a play with a boy. he was paris and I was helen of troy. it was..... unpleasant.my first kiss that was not acting was last summer. we were watching criminal minds but that’s all I remember because I had so much adrenaline65. Are you hungry right now?no66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?depends67. Facebook or Twitter?facebook68. Twitter or Tumblr?tumblr69. Are you watching tv right now?yup70. Names of your bestfriends?jordan, ella, nichole71. Craving something? What?love and affection 72. What colour are your towels?blue and pink72. How many pillows do you sleep with?4-573. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?no74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?like 6 maybe?75. Favourite animal?my dog76. What colour is your underwear?pink77. Chocolate or Vanilla?chocolate78. Favourite ice cream flavour?mmm honey lavender from salt n straw is pretty good79. What colour shirt are you wearing?blue80. What colour pants?black81. Favourite tv show?of all time? idk I love grace and frankie a lot82. Favourite movie?83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?184. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?mean girls85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?I... couldn’t tell you it’s been a while since I watched it86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?dory87. First person you talked to today?in person? nichole88. Last person you talked to today?my sister89. Name a person you hate?jacob. I hate several jacobs lol90. Name a person you love?ella91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?pick any of the jacobs 92. In a fight with someone?no93. How many sweatpants do you have?294. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?like 7 or 8 probably95. Last movie you watched?beginners but nichole and I werent paying attention96. Favourite actress?I admire meryl streep a lot97. Favourite actor?martin sheen98. Do you tan a lot?yeah99. Have any pets?yes, a dog100. How are you feeling?okay? my leg feels weird and my dog is afraid of the fireworks101. Do you type fast?pretty fast, yeah102. Do you regret anything from your past?oh boy103. Can you spell well?I can spell pretty decently104. Do you miss anyone from your past?yes105. Ever been to a bonfire party?no106. Ever broken someone’s heart?maybe?107. Have you ever been on a horse?yeah but for like 5 minutes108. What should you be doing?sleeping109. Is something irritating you right now?my leg110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?yes111. Do you have trust issues?oh yes112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?my mom? or maybe ella113. What was your childhood nickname?monkey or leah bu114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?yes115. Do you play the Wii?I used to116. Are you listening to music right now?no117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?yes118. Do you like Chinese food?yes119. Favourite book?milk and honey is good120. Are you afraid of the dark?sometimes121. Are you mean?depends122. Is cheating ever okay?no123. Can you keep white shoes clean?probably not but I dont know because I dont trust myself to own them lol124. Do you believe in love at first sight?no125. Do you believe in true love?....yes?126. Are you currently bored?knda127. What makes you happy?being with people I love, dogs, music128. Would you change your name?no129. What your zodiac sign?cancer130. Do you like subway?it’s okay131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?turn them down nicely132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?ella I think133. Favourite lyrics right now?ummmmmmm good question134. Can you count to one million?if I wanted to, yeah135. Dumbest lie you ever told?“im not upset”136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?closed137. How tall are you?5′4138. Curly or Straight hair?curly139. Brunette or Blonde?brunette140. Summer or Winter?summer141. Night or Day?night142. Favourite month?april or may maybe143. Are you a vegetarian?no144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?dark145. Tea or Coffee?tea146. Was today a good day?pretty good yeah147. Mars or Snickers?snickers148. What’s your favourite quote?I like what Tchaikovsky says about music149. Do you believe in ghosts?maybe?150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?“just get an early start” from good poems for hard times by garrison keillor

[skiasurveys]

Talk about...

1: Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie. - I cant remember that well since I was a little kid.. ( The lion king), um but I remember being so into it and I loved animals and it kind of started me wanting to draw. But i cant remember the first time i watched it. 

2: Talk about your first kiss.  We were really awkward, I liked him..but not enough, and so we went driving around, got starbucks, and then found this bench and we were talking/flirting, and then he just kissed me. But it was nasty asf, it was so gross. his spit was all over me, blehh. I hated it. I remember being like if this is kissing i do not want it. It wasnt tell i kissed another person that i was like Oh thats what its supposed to be like..

3: Talk about the person you've had the most intense romantic feelings for. He is my current boyfriend. We met on Okcupid in 2015 right after i had finished high school. It was like September. its funny because i wasnt rly serious on that site but then I started to talk to him and we hit it off really well.. we dated for  a week then broke up LMAOOO. But then in April 2016 we started to talk again and in May we dated. so its been a year so far, and i am really in love with him. He and I click very well, he’s  7 years older than me. we play video games together but sometimes i watch him play by himself cus its fun that way too. He likes anime tho and i hate it lol. hes very funny and he can be super sweet and romantic and sometimes hes jusr a fkn nerd. idk what else to say before i start going on forever about it.

4: Talk about the thing you regret most so far.  Meeting the dude who assaulted me. we were just friends and i had a bad feeling about him but i shoved it off. and then he attacked and assaulted me. I wish i went with that gut feeling. Thank god hes gone.

5: Talk about the best birthday you've had.  My best birthday was either my 18th or 19th. My 20th was boring. But my 18th I got a wii U and i got drunk too, and i had fun. but yeah, like idk the best prob was when i was a child and had lotsa friends and cake.

6: Talk about the worst birthday you've had.  My 16th because my dad was dying.

7: Talk about your biggest insecurity.  My biggest insecurity is my body shape.weight. I just hate it because I feel fucking ugly and fat and I really am not, but idk i just want to be skinny and tiny.

8: Talk about the thing you are most proud of. I am proud that i graduated and got my license, since I was struggling to graduate which was like 2 years ago but i was going through a lot.

9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most. I like my eyes, and I do like that i have small hands and feet. ( its easy to find shoes). But I also like my legs and that I have a bigger butt. 

10: Talk about the biggest fight you've ever had.  theres been a few. But i think with my ex friend who just said she hated me and it was random asf, but she ghosted on me after and so it wasnt really a fight. another one i had was when i started to date my current BF and he wasnt being the best and I was like maybe i should drop him so i tried too and then we fought and then we actually were adults and explained the situation and we sorted it all out. since then we have been so good. like we know how eachother works. Lol fuck.

11: Talk about the best dream you've ever had. I cant think of one.

12: Talk about the worst dream you've ever had. i had a nightmare where this creepy ass creature was crawling up my walls and turned its head all around and had lifeless eyes and creepy sharp jagged teeth, and it was just terrifying. but then my mom killed it.. wtf

13: Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time. The first time i had sex I was super nervous. ( It was with my current bf), and we tried and then i started to cry because I was nervous and also from my trauma, and then he was like okay thats fine. Then later that night he asked if we wanted to try again so I said sure. and so we started to make out and then before i knew it was actually inside me and I was like wtf that wasnt bad, and it felt really good. It wasnt overly romantic like they make in movies but it was super good and he was slow and good with me. ever since then i crave dick every minute LMAOOO.

14: Talk about a vacation.  I went to disneyland with my mom the year i was graduating high school. It was so much fun, I felt so safe and happy . I cant really explain what i felt just felt like everything was gonna be OK and the rides were just so awesome and the food was great lol

15: Talk about the time you were most content in life.  It was when I was starting to date Connor again and we were hanging out and I was like wow, my life is going perfect right now and I felt so happy.

16: Talk about the best party you've ever been to. I never go to parties but the one i went to was at my boyfriends friends house and I just started to drink rum n coke and it was really good and made lots of friends but there wasnt that many people there but i felt really happy.

17: Talk about someone you want to be friends with.  I cant think of anyone lol

18: Talk about something that happened in elementary school.   i got bullied alot for stupid shit.

19: Talk about something that happened in middle school.  I was in foods class and I was with my friend Jenna, Brittney, Shae and Julia. There was orientation for the kids from elementary that night, and so we asked if we could stay extra and make the cookies and so we were allowed. Then Julia and Shae left to use the washroom. Jenna and I had finished up and were heading to our other class, and as we walked in there was a alarm for a lock down and we were like holy shit. There was somekid with a knife walking around. they calmed him down, but it was really creepy. But our friend brittney was by herself in the foods room and she was crying and i felt so bad omg rip brittney

20: Talk about something that happened in high school.  I had math class one afternoon and the class before me apparently this girl had a seizure. But i didnt know, so when we walked in the classroom I was like wtf why are the desks all pushed around and so i thought they did some activity, but it turns out this girl had a seizure, and my friend told me about it and how it was super traumatizing our teacher even got bit. it was really weird..

21: Talk about a time you had to turn someone down.  He is my friend still but he really liked me and he asked me out and I had to tell him No and i said that i wasnt looking for a relationship but it was super awkward but hes cool.

22: Talk about your worst fear.  choking.

23: Talk about a time someone turned you down. I really liked this one guy and we went on a first date and then he asked if  i wanted to chill the next week and so i said sure. But then that day he had texted me and said he was busy and that i couldnt come over and so I was like Oh ok, cool. and then he told me to make sure i wasnt looking for anything serious, and then so i never saw him again after the first date. But he was really boring so thank god i didn’t. and its funny cus a few months after he had some gf and i think he is still with her cus i would see them at the mall all the time. but yeah im glad it didnt work out!

24: Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot. One night ( this is cheesy ) It was like 4 am and Connor was watching TV and I was scrolling through tumblr lookin at funny memes/posts and he just turned and looked at me and said “Jen, youre my best friend” and it just made my night. It was super sweet and i felt great. 

25: Talk about an ex-best friend.  ho ho ho okay, so we were friends since grade 9 summer/beg of grade 10. we were close asf, we liked the same shit, we thought the same. she was great. she was the first best friend i ever had rly. so a couple times through out our friendship she would kind of vanisha nd not talk but it was her depression and it was annoying asf. anyways.. after grade 12 grad  (this is like oct 2015), i tried to message her but it wouldnt let me! so i soon realized she blocked me on everything. i texted her thanks for that and then feb 2016 we became friends again, then may 2016 she ghosted on me but she finally sent message saying how she hated me etc and really too this day it hurts but i still dont know what actually fucking happened.

26: Talk about things you do when you're sick.  if im really sick  i just sleep and watch youtube videos. or ill have a bath.

27: Talk about your favorite part of someone else's body.  i really love my boyfriends arms. theyre so big and strong. mmmm.

28: Talk about your fetishes.  i dont rly have a fetish tbh.

29: Talk about what turns you on.  i like when my bf dominates me, but not too hardcore. I like neck kissing, facial hair, deep voices, motivation. I like being tackled like play fighting and i like when he touches my thighs etc. mm

30: Talk about what turns you off.  being an asshole, racist/sexiest, if youre super smelly. if youre really tall and skinny.

31: Talk about what you think death is like.  i dont know. its probably weird asf.

32: Talk about a place you remember from your childhood.  i remember this place called Moonwalkers and it was this crazyass jungle gym we had and it was the best shit ever.

33: Talk about what you do when you are sad.  i draw, listen to music, have a bath..etc

34: Talk about the worst physical pain you've endured. getting hit by a car.

35: Talk about things you wish you could stop doing.  i wish i would stop comparing myself to every fucking person i see.

36: Talk about your guilty pleasures.  some anime. 

37: Talk about someone you thought you were in love with. i thought i loved wade, but i really was just liking the idea of someone. this was in high school. lol it was really weird and i didnt like it.

38: Talk about songs that remind you of certain people. it depeds on the song and the person. pink floyd reminds me ofmy ex friend. Anime/kpop songs remind me of Kyra and super lovely songs and omam remind me of connor

39: Talk about things you wish you'd known earlier.  not everyone you lose is a loss.

40: Talk about the end of something in your life. the end of high school and teenage years was really weird. i remember feeling so out of place and not sure what t do with myself.

[artificialcats]

1 - 150

omg thanks answers under the cut bc this is going to b long

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

tbh dont even remember but ive never like, held hands w anyone ~romantically~ or w/e

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

SHY but i have my more outgoing moments every once in a while

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

Quinn!!! and my other friends and my sister back home :-) and my cat

4. Are you easy to get along with?

uhh idk? i guess?

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

tbh dont know 

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

nice ones. cute ones. ones interested in the same stuff as me ?

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

my friend did a tarot reading for me a week ago and when i asked if id have a gf this year the answer was not good lmao so doubtful

8. Who from another gender is on your mind?

idk?

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

im p indifferent

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

tbh my memory is garbage idk

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“signing tomorrow at 3:30″ cryptic out of context

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

the traveller- beach house (just walked to it in a fashion show! its good), boyfriend--best coast, sleepover--hayley kiyoko, forever (pt II)--snakehips, and a variety of tennis songs i cant choose from 

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

ya

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

not particularly

15. What good thing happened this summer?

last summer i got to do a bunch of fun stuff w different friends! 

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

ive never kissed anyone before LMAO (last “person” ive ever kissed was my cat on the head and ya id do that again)

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

I MEAN like the universe is so expansive theres no way theres NOT some other form of life out there 

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

lmao no 

19. Do you like bubble baths?

nah i dont like baths 

20. Do you like your neighbors?

at home yes (QUINN!!) and no (dont talk to anyone else) 

21. What are you bad habits?

nail picking, a lot of other stuff im too tired to list rn

22. Where would you like to travel?

would love to road trip it across the west

23. Do you have trust issues?

maybe? idk

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

moisturizing 

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

tbh feeling p good abt my body rn.. maybe my shoulders.. ive always disliked how square they r..

26. What do you do when you wake up?

p much immediately get in the shower

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

never thought abt it

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my close friends

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

i dont have any exes

30. Do you ever want to get married?

maybe someday but not for a loooong long time

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

no

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

im ace so like,, none of them 

33. Spell your name with your chin.

losauirtfsa

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

nope. used to play tennis tho

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

probably tv. love music too much

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

HA ofc living that life rn

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

uh probably nothing

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

nice, supportive, is willing to dance around to/sing along w 70s/80s/2000s music w me 

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

thrift stores probably.. never know what youre going to find

40. What do you want to do after high school?

well rn im in college and thats p much what i was going for in high school so 

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

nah

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

probably just that i dont feel like talking? or im tired

43. Do you smile at strangers?

usually

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

outer space theres some whack stuff in the ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

idk

46. What are you paranoid about?

a looot of things LMAO

47. Have you ever been high?

nope

48. Have you ever been drunk?

nope

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

no

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

grey

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

sometimes but usually just in like a ‘they look rlly cool’ or ‘i rlly like their style’ kind of way like just kind of envious

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

probably like, throwing my depression out the window

53. Favourite makeup brand?

dont wear makeup enough lmao

54. Favourite store?

tbh dont rlly have one also this is rlly similar to  previous question?

55. Favourite blog?

i love the househunting blog but idk if i rlly have a favorite

56. Favourite colour?

PINK

57. Favourite food? 

chicken bc theres so much good stuff u can do w it

58. Last thing you ate?

mini twix bar 

59. First thing you ate this morning?

eggs on toast

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

yea won a couple different ones for art related stuff

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

nope

62. Been arrested? For what?

nope

63. Ever been in love? 

platonically ya romantically no i dont think so

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

a short one: never happened

65. Are you hungry right now?

no ive been snacking all night lol

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

my tumblr friends p much are my rl friends so,, no

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

no

70. Names of your bestfriends? 

quinn

71. Craving something? What?

the sweet warm embrace of my bed

72. What colour are your towels?

one is pastel blue one is black/white/grey stripe

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

two

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

yea. i have a big pusheen plush and at home a mini dino pillow pet n a cat plush

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

like.. 3 i think? i used to have a L O T 

75. Favourite animal?

cats

76. What colour is your underwear?

black

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

once i had cardamom n it was rlly rlly good 

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

white w blue stripes

80. What colour pants?

jean overalls

81. Favourite tv show?

OOGH rn the getdown, stranger things, parks n rec, x files, downton abbey, charmed, a lot, 

82. Favourite movie?

jurassic park

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

neither

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

neither

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

dont have one

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

idk maybe nemo? never rlyl though abt it

87. First person you talked to today?

my mom

88. Last person you talked to today?

my sister

89. Name a person you hate?

idk

90. Name a person you love?

all my friends

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

not anyone i kno personally

92. In a fight with someone?

idk

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

like one pair and i never wear them lmao

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

a couple

95. Last movie you watched?

ella enchanted

96. Favourite actress?

no one comes to mind ?

97. Favourite actor?

idk jeff goldblum? 

98. Do you tan a lot?

no

99. Have any pets?

yes!! two cats

100. How are you feeling?

tired but ok

101. Do you type fast?

i think so yea

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

idk

103. Can you spell well?

im ok

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

kind of but i know we’re so different now we probably wouldnt even get along.. its not a miss i feel all the time tho more of a ‘we knew each other for so long its kind of sad we grew apart’

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

i want to say yes but it wasnt like a party party

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

not that i know

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yes

108. What should you be doing?

my homework 

109. Is something irritating you right now?

school. im ready to get out of here

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

i dont think so

111. Do you have trust issues?

wasnt this question already asked

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

my friend steph i think (over the final fantasy ending LMAO)

113. What was your childhood nickname?

i dont think i had one

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yea

115. Do you play the Wii?

not a lot no

116. Are you listening to music right now?

yep (rn its 0 to 100 by drake on shuffle)

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

not really. i like the broth tho

118. Do you like Chinese food?

ya

119. Favourite book?

aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

depends

121. Are you mean?

i try not to be

122. Is cheating ever okay?

nah

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

NO LMAO i have a bad habit of standing on my own feet my white shoes r so gross

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

idk

125. Do you believe in true love?

idk

126. Are you currently bored?

not rlly

127. What makes you happy?

my friends, cats, pink, good food, nature, making my own art, old houses n rooms, lots of stuff

128. Would you change your name?

never thought about it

129. What your zodiac sign?

aries

130. Do you like subway?

not rlly

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

what

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

im p sure this ? was already asked

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

134. Can you count to one million?

y

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

dont remember but lots of em

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed. i cant sleep w them open 

137. How tall are you?

5′10″

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i have straight hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

im blonde? i dont kno if theses r refering to me or what i prefer on other people?

140. Summer or Winter? 

summer

141. Night or Day?

tbh a tie

142. Favourite month?

dont have one!

143. Are you a vegetarian?

no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

neither

146. Was today a good day?

it was ok

147. Mars or Snickers?

no preference

148. What’s your favourite quote?

dont have one

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

i mean i dont not believe in ghosts

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? 

“Grant said “what did you think?”” -Jurassic Park

[carcinized]

The Antlers have a few good songs!!! I would probably reccomend the album In the Attic of the Universe!!

Jason Mraz also has some really good songs as well- A couple of my favorites are Have it All and Im Yours!!!!

ooOh the antlers, never heard of them but i like them already for the name lmao, will look them up now!!

awww i love the album art!!! it’s so sweet (assuming there’s not some dark symbolism i missed at first glance). oh my god is this intro song just a bunch of like?? recorded sounds meant to sound like you’re scrounging around an attic?? with little tiny blips of music here and there?? oh wait no there’s music now, pretty acoustic guitar i love!!! OH A MINOR CHORD I LOVE EVEN MORE- this is going to get piano or like. xylophone soon isnt it. okay this is really gorgeous??? i never listen to this type of music but i absolutely adore it, soft to loud, the dynamic is so cool. OH THERES THE PIANO I KNEW THIS WAS COMING- it almost has like,,, if cavetown were older vibes??? if you know what i mean?? it’s a similar style. (sent this to my gf cuz i thought she might like it lol)

omg the songs fade into each other this album has so many things i am a sucker for- and this is gorgeous and chill??? i could vibe to this forever. ... OMG IT CHANGED AGAIN IT- LOUD GUITAR GUITAR I LOVE IT WNABSBUSJSJSHSHS

oh it’s on the next song now!!! this album is legit cool as hell thank you for sending me it?? just checked their page and holy shit why do they not have more plays/monthly listeners this is incredible music??? OH PIANO IS BACK- there’s a similar effect in a lot of the piano parts to the one in everything i wanted by billie eilish, don’t remember what it’s called atm tho 😔 but this is really pretty, can’t wait to listen to the rest of this album later, going to check out the other songs you recommended as well as some of my other asks lol OH WAIT FUCK MORE ISNTRUMENTS CAME IN I- I DONT HAVE THE SELF CONTROL TO TURN THIS OFF FUCK- HAHA WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME ANON SNDNNXNXNDND IMMACULATE MUSIC THANK YOU FOR SENDING ME IT

i skipped through the rest of the album for lack of time, but you bet i am going to listen to this again in depth (probably many times). this is such pretty rainy day music i LOVE IT

on to jason mraz, who i have heard of, but i think i’m getting him mixed up with at least two other jasons, so i have no idea what his music sounds like. (also, i thought he was an actor because there are too many celebrities named jason and i don’t keep up with celebrities lmao).

ooh this songs gonna have a good bass drop huh ... i was right lmao. OOH PRETTY PRECHORUS- this is just fun happy go lucky music huh? i should listen to that more often- this sounds almost like 2000s bruno mars to me sjdndnxnxjxj- OH DAMN THIS IS FROM 2018????? why does this keep happening to me, i keep thinking songs are from like 2006 and they’re from 2014-2019 sOb i listen to too much 2000s music huh-

i’m yours- WAIT THIS SONG ISNT BRUNO MARS????? well then. today has been educational for me- this song had better from like 2010 or i’m going to riot. 2008 THANK GOD AJSJJSJS- no wonder i thought the other song was from the 2000s, another song of this guy was lmao. ... the more i listen to this the more i realize it sounds nothing like bruno mars, wtf past me- conclusion of this guy is that it’s some solid wholesome music but not really the type of music i listen to lol.

anon, you have a 10/10 music taste ily

[wazm]

kinda lost blog

I just wish to feel genuine joy in my life. I'm so afraid of chasing my goals cos what if I get to where I need to be and it's not exactly what I want. nevermind trying to reach for my goals cos I've been doing that..working every day..trying to bring myself closer to my goals but fail...struggling to sit down and just write music...i can't get myself to do it... I can't get myself to create anything.. I procrastinate the things I'm supposed to do with irrelevant big tasks..trying to distract myself constantly... I just feel empty inside...

what makes my hallow chest even deeper is the fact that all my relationships remind me of the bad decisions I've made..and theyre, not even bad decisions..its just meh...average..nothing worthwhile noting really..combined with abunch of negative outcomes...like he fact that i know a shit ton of people but i have zero real friends...i once had a friend who knew me for more than 7 years but he never exactly knew his boundaries...he’d show up to my house unannounced...id never get space...but at least i still had a friend..id do countless favors for him and never ask him anything in return but giving me space...one time i tried distancing myself from him and when i started to notice, he got so offended...after this happened, we never spoke to months...probs the longest time apart since we’ve been friends...then we kinda rekindled things...and he decided to plan a guys trip to bring us closer together...trip was okay...but ended really bad...he blocked me off everything..games, facebook, whatsapp...everything...he lives up the road from me...but ive never seen him since....idk if its a blessing or a curse...i hope things are okay with him...he wasnt the smartest but he was smart enough to comprehend certain sitautions ive been going through...good enough for me to vent to and console me...thats kinda all i need sometimes...but no more of that...he was kinda my bridge to a group of other friends we had...and after the boys trip it was like i lost everyone..social life took a hard knock...im sorry..just wish you trusted me more...

i tried filling the void by making my gf do things i did with my friends...never went down well...she just seems like someone who never knows how to have fun anymore..we used to have interesting chats..i was so inlove with her, I never saw her flaws...and she taught me this word “resentment”...well its not tht i never saw her flaws...i just chose to ignore them..and told myself that things will get better, and she’ll grow..and change...but i feel like shes been making me more like her since we’ve been dating...i swear i did so much things before her...but we’ve been together so long, i dont even know who that person is anymore...i bet, even if i left her, i wouldnt be able to bounce back...and the odd thing is that, when we started dating almost 5 years ago, i made it our philosphy that we are individuals in a relationship, we are not the relationship but it seems like she wasnt even herself back then and started being me...and now its like, shes nothing without me and my whole life has grown so much onto her, i kinda feel the same in return...just less attached to her since i felt like i was feeding her nucleas...might be exaggerating but homegirl cant initiate anything without me. nevermind choosing a meal when we go out, she cant even make a plan without needing 90% input from my side...and thats how most things are between us...if shes upset, ill fix it...risk my life and beyond to fix it...physically have done this many times before...walked from my house to hers at 2am in the morning, through the ghettos, more than a kilometer away..even been gun pointed and got things stolen from me, just to make her feel better when she was upset in the middle of the night...im not expecting that in return but she lits does the bare minimum in return...id be sad, then she be like...awww...im sad you’re sad...done..thats it...she’d lits be like...what can i do to fix things....again wanting my input...i might as well be dating myself...idk why im with this girl anymore...i hurt inside everytime i tell her i love her...cos i just dont anymore...and its been like this for a while...i wish she found this post and decided to leave me..cos i cant leave her...ive broken her heart so many times and told her i wanted to leave but i just end up coming back to her cos im sucha fucking pussy seeking some sort of social acceptence or friendship and i feel like shes all i have rn...not much of a gf hey...but its not like im worth anything either...idk...im so paranoid shes cheated on me in the past cos shes lied to me in the past and told me 3 years later about those lies...you know when someone lies to you and then when you find out about the lies and you ask why’d you do it and shes like...idk...i just feel like its lies ontop of lies...really cant trust her....i wish i had it in me to cheat on her...but i just dont like most females...id be infatuated with someone but would be put off so easily by the slightest thign...things would make so much sense if i was secretly gay but im not...the longer i seem to be in this place, the deeper im digging my grave...i feel like the time with my almost 5 year relationship feels like its getting harder to leave the longer i stay in it....i really dont know what to do...but i feel like i fuck up most of my relationships...not just my romantic one...

my relationship with my parents are just a nightmare...same goes for my other family members...and you know what...i do so much for people...countless favors...countless volunteer jobs...extra miles for people who wont even move an inch for me...but just let me mention this to anyone, then im in the wrong...i just feel like i cant voice any shortcomings to anyone and im made out to be the bad guy for doing this....whether its my parents or my sisters...id do everything for them, and i do everything for them, even things they dont ask me for...but let me raise an opinion that doesnt resonate with them, and it turns into an argument and if i decide to step out before things get sour, im still made out to be the bad guy cos how dare i do something so rude....i just feel like no1 wants to listen to me at all...for my last birthday i tried staying away from my family and decided to work on a few movies with my friends and i had fun, we arent the closes friends but, campus friends...theyre actually in a whole other faculty..so we just barely know eachother but we’ve worked on movies before and thats kinda our history together as friends....so its my birthday and i agreed to work with them on this day...all day..from like 7am until almost 10pm..and my family, not communicating with me, decides to go out for supper for my birthday...and just expects me to leave this project im working on for them...so they invite people to join them for this birthday supper...without having me there...anyways after i finished my day shooting, i was pretty smug about working instead of spending the day with my family...and on the last few moments of my birthday my sister makes a shitty comment, wanting me to shut the fuck up cos she doesnt have the energy to listen to my voice..it really broken my heart, how my whole birthday was spoilt in moments....wish she couldve just waited a tiny bit longer...i wouldve been happy with that..but naa...no1 wants to listen to anything i have to say, let alone have me around in their presence....i just feel like starting a new life somewhere else...and thats kinda what i had planned...

really thought i was going to leave south africa and immigrate to australia to go sound study there...filled in all the paper work...spoke back-and-forth with the uni over there and they extended the communication so long, i thought things were set...seemed like i was so close to getting the big change ive been seeking for so long...but they sent me this stinky ‘ol email with extra modules id have to do and the tuition fees went from $11,000 to $35,000 which is ridiculous as my countries currency isnt australian dollars and is 10 units weaker than theirs...never in my life have i ever felt like money defined my life...lits had my life in limbo cos i was waiting for responses from this people...and when i finally got a response it was too late to apply at the local college...idk what im doing this year...i tried looking for work online, but no response...made ads for work on fiverr...tried upwork, tried quickengig...even rev...all these sites people advertise as quick ways to make money....a bunch of lies...i made $0, 3 weeks going now. nothing. i even invested in making a business logo, wrote descriptions...adjusted my ads multiple times...still...blue ticks from the online work field...i applied for jobs ive seen on indeed and on gumtree and jobfinder....but no response...nothing...blue ticked...ima say luckily im working part-time for this events company and its kinda an opportunity to network with the sound industry but the live sound industry is filled with racist pricks who patronize you when you’ve done the time to learn the work they know...so no work online freelancing, no work applying for work..no work physically meeting people...really makes me feel like this isnt a viable option for me...cant even study locally or internationally anymore...

im just so lost...alone..hurt..wish someone would save me the way ive saved others before..

[your-yandere-gf]

Tagged by @astolforiderofblack​

what was your last…

1. drink; Water

2. phone call; I called my mom to see if one of my textbooks arrived 

3. message sent; I think it was about getting that damn textbook again tbh

4. song you listened to; I dont really listen to music

5. time you cried; about a week ago.  crying is hard for me, I do it internally

— have you ever…

6. dated someone twice; no

7. kissed someone and regretted it; oh yes

8. been cheated on; yep

9. lost someone special; yea

10. been depressed; lmfao 

11. gotten drunk and thrown up; I did like last weekend

— favourite colours…

12. Black

13. Brown

14. Blue

— in the last year have you…

15. made new friends; yep

16. fallen out of love; yea but thats a really long story

17. laughed until you cried; probably? 

18. found out someone was talking about you; no, but im sure there were people talking shit somewhere

19. met someone who changed you; I dont really feel like it?

20. found out who your friends are; more of the opposite tbh

21. kissed someone on your Facebook friends list; no

— general

22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know irl; Pretty much all of them

23. do you have any pets; two cats named Saber and Clover.  three dogs named Leo, Macy, and Lilly

24. do you want to change your name; idk, my name irl is really gender neutral so I dont really hate it

25. what did you do for your last birthday; not really anything I think

26. what time did you wake up today; 6:57 am.  Only reason I know that is because it was 3 minutes before my alarm was going to go off and I was frustrated that I couldn't go back to sleep

27. what were you doing at midnight last night; I think I was saying goodnight to the GF or sleeping.

28. what’s something you can’t wait for; moving out and getting to live my own life

29. what’s your favourite animal; Kitties

30. what are you listening to rn; the sound of my hard drive spinning and the keys typing lol

31. have you ever talked to a person named Tom; yes, I was friends with a Tom for a while.  Turned out to be a fucking asshole

32. something that’s getting on your nerves; knowing that if I do transition like I really fucking want to im going to be judged forever and have a billion times harder time finding a job

33. most visited website; tumblr

34. hair colour; brown

35. long or short; hair? not long enough

36. do you have a crush on someone; my GF of course

37. what do you like about yourself; I would like to say my intelligence, but I really dont want to come across as narcissistic. 

38. want any piercings; fuck yes.  I want to get my ears done a few more times and probably my nose too if I can get away with it

39. blood type; B neg

40. nicknames; Maki?

41. relationship status; taken

42. Sign; Gemini

43. pronouns; she/her (whatever really as long as its not male)

44. fave tv show; HBO’s Band of Brothers and The Pacific

45. tattoos; nope

46. right or left handed; right

47. ever had surgery; too many times 

48. piercings; ears

49. sport; hell no

50. vacation; I would really like to visit Japan at some point, but also Russia tbh.

51. trainers; wut

52. eating; I just devoured a whole pizza cause im a fat fuck and hardly ever eat anything.  Maybe one meal a day?

53. drinking; Water 

54. about to watch; I’ll probably watch some more arrow later

55. waiting for; the weekend.  I really need a drink

56. want; FUCKING ESTROGEN PLEASE GOD LET ME MOVE OUTTTT

57. get married; I really dont know about that

58. career; History Professor

— which is better…

59. hugs or kisses; hugs for sure

60. lips or eyes; eyes

61. taller or shorter; shorter

62. older or younger; older

63. nice arms or stomach; arms

64. hookups or relationships; I have a GF lol

65. troublemaker or hesitant; hesitant? I mean I am so idk

66.  kissed a stranger; eww

67. drank hard liquor; Every weekend pretty much

68. turned someone down; no?

69. sex on first date; whats sex?

70. broken someone’s heart; I dont think so.

71. had your heart broken; a few times

72. been arrested; nope

73. cried when someone died; not until after the fact and it has sunk in

74. fallen for a friend; yep

— do you believe in…

75. yourself; lol no

76. miracles; nope

77. love at first sight; also no

78. Santa Claus; no

79. angels; as in biblical angels? no

— misc…

80. eye colour; blue

81. best friends name; Aaron

82. Favourite movie: I have no idea tbh, there are too many that I really like

83. favourite actor; Matt Damon and Kit Harrington.

84. favourite cartoon; long long ago it was Spongebob.  Now that nostalgia lives on in memes

tagging, well just do this if you want to.  

[adwsbvuoas]

I found these questions and I'm bored. — 1. Who was the last person you held hands with? - @danc1ng1nth3ra1n 2. Are you outgoing or shy? - shy 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? - @danc1ng1nth3ra1n 4. Are you easy to get along with? - I really dont know. I would guess yes. 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? - I think so, but if I'm drunk there's a fairly high chance she is with me. 6. What kind of people are you attracted to? - Kind, loyal and honest people. 7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? - Well I hope so 🤔 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? - @danc1ng1nth3ra1n 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? - Depends on the person and if its online where nobody really knows you or face-to-face 10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? - @danc1ng1nth3ra1n 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? - "Goodnight, I love you too! 🖤🖤" 12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? - Bausa - Baron Written by Wolves - To tell you the truth Deadmau5 - Pets 5Haus - Shapeshifting EXGF - We are the hearts 13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? - Again, it depends on the person. If its my gf I have absolutely no problem with that, if its my mother I have a huge problem with that 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? - The "sciency-guy" in me tells I dont, while my feelings tell me otherwise. 15. What good thing happened this summer? - This summer was shit tbh. Jakes 7th anniversary and Chesters death... 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? - ABSOLUTELY 17. Do you think there is life on other planets? - Yes. Its dumb to believe that we are the only "smart" species in this world. I also think that its possible that they arent carbon-based 18. Do you still talk to your first crush? - Nope 19. Do you like bubble baths? - Kinda 20. Do you like your neighbors? - They dont bother me, so thats nice 21. What are your bad habits? - Eating when frustrated or sad. 22. Where would you like to travel? - New York, New Zealand, Japan, Ireland (again) 23. Do you have trust issues? - Yep 24. Favorite part of your daily routine? - Looking in the mirror and realizing that I'm a huge disappontment. Jokes aside that would be the moment when I come home and my dog greets my as if I was away for years. 25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My stomach 26. What do you do when you wake up? - Dressing, washing, brushing my teeth 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? - I dont care 28. Who are you most comfortable around? - @danc1ng1nth3ra1n, and my best friends 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? - Nope 30. Do you ever want to get married? - I dont really care. 31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? - I dont think so. Its fairly long for a man, but not long enough for a ponytail. 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? I think Jennifer Lawrence would probably be in there. Third person-??? 33. Spell your name with your chin. - Mika 34. Do you play sports? What sports? - Does eSports count? 🤔 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? - Without TV, definitely 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? - No 37. What do you say during awkward silences? - "Ok, I'm sorry" 38. Describe your dream girl/guy? - @danc1ng1nth3ra1n 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? - The candy store. For real: probably a vans store 40. What do you want to do after high school? - I already have a training space, after that I think Im gonna study 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? - Most people do 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? - Probably that the situation is extremely awkward or uncomfortably for me, OR that I'm really enjoying the moment 43. Do you smile at strangers? - Sometimes 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? - Space 45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? - Knowing that people would be disappointed even more if I dont succeed in school 46. What are you paranoid about? - Losing the ones I love. Also I hate when people are behind my back. I just feel watched, so if I turn my back to you that means I really trust you 47. Have you ever been high? - One week ago 48. Have you ever been drunk? - One week ago 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? - well kinda 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? - Black 51. Ever wished you were someone else? - yep, I mean who doesn't want to be the president or Elon Musk? 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? - Reduce my body weight 53. Favourite makeup brand? - 🤔🤔🤔 54. Favourite store? - The music store 55. Favourite blog? - @danc1ng1nth3ra1n 56. Favourite colour? - Black, dark blue, orange 57. Favourite food? - Pizza, Ice cream, Cookies 58. Last thing you ate? - Some candy 59. First thing you ate this morning? - A little piece of chocolate (I was already awake for more than 4 hours at this point) 60. Ever won a competition? For what? - I think two for "bike racing" and 2 for rc car driving 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? - Not from school 62. Been arrested? For what? - Not yet 63. Ever been in love? - Yes 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? - I rather dont 65. Are you hungry right now? - Not really 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? - I dont really have friends on here. My gf is using tumblr too, and obviously I know here 67. Facebook or Twitter? - TWITTER 68. Twitter or Tumblr? Twitter for memes and shitposting, tumblr for serious stuff 69. Are you watching tv right now? - Nope 70. Names of your bestfriends? - Amrei, Robin, Arnim, Svenja, Eva 71. Craving something? What? - A hug. A long, tight hug. 72. What colour are your towels? - Blue? 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? - A lot. 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? - Yep, I have a few that are as old as I am 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? - around 200? In my bed i have around 5 or so 75. Favourite animal? - Black panther, cats, dogs, snakes and spiders. I also like big cats like tigers and so on really much. Also wolves. Wolves are wonderful creatures. I like animals in general! 76. What colour is your underwear? - Pink/white I think 🤔🤔 77. Chocolate or Vanilla? - Chocolate 78. Favourite ice cream flavour? - Chocolate 79. What colour shirt are you wearing? - Blue 80. What colour pants? - Black 81. Favourite tv show? - Elementary, Scorpion, Bojack Horseman 82. Favourite movie? - Star Wars 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? - Wat 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? - Wat 85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? - Wat 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? - The doves. MINE. 87. First person you talked to today? Sadly my mother. 88. Last person you talked to today? My wonderful gf 89. Name a person you hate? - Hate is a strong word. I dont hate many people, but my parents are two of them 90. Name a person you love? - @danc1ng1nth3ra1n 91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? - My parents 92. In a fight with someone? - My parents. Constantly 93. How many sweatpants do you have? - 6?7? 94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? - Too many 95. Last movie you watched? - Before the flood 96. Favourite actress? - I dont know 97. Favourite actor? - I dont knoe 98. Do you tan a lot? - No 99. Have any pets? - A cat and a dog 100. How are you feeling? - "Meh" 101. Do you type fast? - Pretty fast, but there are definitely people that type faster 102. Do you regret anything from your past? - a lot, but then again no. Because my faults from the past lead me to this point in life which is good 103. Can you spell well? - w e l l 104. Do you miss anyone from your past? - Yes, Jake 105. Ever been to a bonfire party? - Kinda 106. Ever broken someone’s heart? - I hope that I didnt 107. Have you ever been on a horse? - Yes 108. What should you be doing? - Right now? Probably sleeping 109. Is something irritating you right now? - No 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? - Kinda. 111. Do you have trust issues? - Again, yes 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? - My gf 113. What was your childhood nickname? - Mika 114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? - Yes 115. Do you play the Wii? - No 116. Are you listening to music right now? - Yes 117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? - Yes 118. Do you like Chinese food? - YES 119. Favourite book? - The boy in the striped pajamas. 120. Are you afraid of the dark? - Just a little bit anxious 121. Are you mean? - I think that I am, but I really dont want to be 122. Is cheating ever okay? - In games under some circumstances, in a relationship no way 123. Can you keep white shoes clean? - No 124. Do you believe in love at first sight? - Yes 125. Do you believe in true love? - Yes 126. Are you currently bored? -Yes 127. What makes you happy? -Being around my favourite people 128. Would you change your name? - I would delete my second name 129. What your zodiac sign? - Capricorn 130. Do you like subway? - Yes 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? - Cry, then talk with them about it, cry more 132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? - Still @danc1ng1nth3ra1n 133. Favourite lyrics right now? - "You're too good for me 134. Can you count to one million? - Probably if I really wanted to 135. Dumbest lie you ever told? - In a police control "I have never done drugs" 136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? - Closed 137. How tall are you? - 1.90m/6'2"-6'3" 138. Curly or Straight hair? - i dont care 139. Brunette or Blonde? - I dont care 140. Summer or Winter? - Winter 141. Night or Day? - Night 142. Favourite month? - i dont have one, but I really like november 143. Are you a vegetarian? - Nope 144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? - Milk chocolate 145. Tea or Coffee? - Cocoa 146. Was today a good day? - Kinda 147. Mars or Snickers? - Twix 148. What’s your favourite quote? - "Remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious. And however difficult life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at. It matters that you don't just give up." - Stephen Hawking. In my opinion this quote is just inspiring. 149. Do you believe in ghosts? - Not really 150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? - "Die Fenster der Kaserne sind leer und dunkel" which means something like "The windows of the barracks are empty and dark" If you still have questions, ask me! C: