#dont use me and other people and other things even Suggesting you should at least Try to make life a little easier

[amuyyi]

warm enough .

synopsis; recovering from an expected breakup, you find yourself drunk at a nearby bar, encountering an unfamiliar girl who happens to know your ex.

trope; non idol!ningning x fem!reader, uni au, fluff, a little angst, a little suggestive, strangers to lovers, feat. kep1er members :3

wc; 4.8k

cw; a little suggestive but not really

a/n; fun fact this happened to me irl ! figured i could use my experiences for stories ! everything from the breakup to the bar kiss is based on my personal experience so lol have fun. also its kinda poorly written because i wrote some of it while on the plane + in china while being very tired and i dont feel like proofreading so im sorry ^^'

The breakup was supposed to be a mutual thing. A smooth and easy agreement between you and Jimin. You guys met in a cafe when your soon-to-be-ex girlfriend finally dropped the bomb on you. 

“I still care a lot about you, y/n. But I want to focus on myself and my future… I think you should too.”

You wanted to speak up, say that you didn’t want to let go yet. Just… hold on for a little longer. Maybe it’d get better if you guys just kept it going for another week. Another month. Another day?

 “What I’m trying to say is…”

You always hated this part.

“I think we should break up.”

Despite the older girl being the one to initiate the ending of the relationship, you always knew it was coming. Jimin was sweet, and you definitely did enjoy the little dates you guys had been on through the past year, but there was something missing. Every time she looked at you, it seemed like she was looking through your eyes into her own. Her mind was always elsewhere whenever you two were together, like she was searching for something you couldn’t provide. She never seemed to smile around you, never laughed loudly or hugged you with warmth. 

You really tried to be the person for her, you really did; but it was apparent that she was trying to convince herself you were the one as well.

It was shown in the way she bought you endless gifts with things you said you wanted, but never kissed you, In the way she would allow you to hold her hand, but never reached out herself, how she couldn’t bring herself to say “I love you” out loud. Jimin was cold.

You agreed that this was the best path to take, how you felt the exact same way and that it would be good for the both of you, but the tears that nonconsensually left your eyes said otherwise. You still remember the last words you told her before you got up to leave.

“I really hoped it was you.”

There's a saying or the other. “Your body will know if someone is right for you.” You came across it while aimlessly scrolling on social media once, and you thought it was an interesting but ridiculous concept. Countless people would share stories about how their hair would fall out or how they would break out into horrible acne when they were with their past partners, only being relieved from this when single or with their “match.”

It was funny, and you didn’t believe one bit of it until it actually happened. The tightness in your chest that followed you every time you two went out together, the stress of wondering if she actually enjoyed her company, the way you couldn’t truly relax in her presence– it all went away. It all left when she walked out of your life, and you’ve never felt more at peace with a decision. At least, for a little bit.

The breakup was the easy part. It was the recovery that ruined you.

You were the one to establish a rule of no contact, even after you both expressed wanting to stay in touch. It was your only way to hold on to the last sliver of pride you had left after spending a year chasing after Yu Jimin. The rule was established to allow you some time to heal, and you hoped to return to the girl as friends once you felt ready.

With this in mind, you then proceeded to spend a month barely eating, barely sleeping, and not leaving your apartment unless you needed to for classes. It was difficult to be on your own after dedicating so much time to her, falling behind, hoping that she would see you the way you saw her; but after about a month, you slowly felt yourself regaining your footing.

You started going out again, talking with your roommate, taking time to actually care for yourself. It was nice. Perhaps your progress would have left you comfortable enough to move on if you didn’t decide to go out that day.

There she was. Yu Jimin. After an exact 31 days of no contact with her, you finally cross paths. Quite literally, at that– but she wasn’t alone. There was a girl on her arm. She was pretty. Blonde with bobbed hair and a soft smile that made it impossible to hate her. Jimin was smiling too. This is the first time you’ve seen her smile like that, smiling as if she found what she was looking for after all of this time. She doesn't look past her. She sees her.

Jimin holds the other girl by the small of her waist the way she used to do with you, and she kisses her. She kissed her. Just like how she used to kiss you, but not exactly. There's love in her eyes. A warmth you’ve never seen before. In her eyes, there is certainty.

And that was the day your world came crashing down on top of you.

You tried to act normal as you walked past. You really did. Your eyes remain glued to your phone as your knuckles turn white. Her eyes didn’t even meet yours as you walked by. Why wouldn't she look at you? Maybe she's wondering why you won't look at her. That must be it. You hold your breath. As soon as she passed by, you couldn’t help yourself. You made the mistake of looking back.

…Nothing.

As soon as Jimin was out of sight, you cried. You ran home, scaring half the life out of your poor roommate, Xiaoting, as you collapsed in your bed. Everything hurts. Why did it hurt? You wanted this. You felt better without her— the tightness in your chest was gone. 

Instead, it was replaced by an indescribably painful ache. One that felt so deep within your soul it would never heal. Quietly entering your room, Xiaoting says nothing as she sits next to your limp body on the bed, rubbing your back comfortingly. The gesture only makes you sob even harder. 

She's been with you through it all. From the beginning of your relationship with Jimin till the end, she was there. Xiaoting really was a good friend.

From then on, Xiaoting’s one goal was simple: cheer you up. She would cook at least once for you every day despite not being the best chef, and she would allow you to rant about the same things over and over no matter how overbearing it got. Honestly, you started to feel a little bad. She shouldn’t have to bend over backwards for you just because you’re a little sad.

So when Xiaoting announces that you will be joining her at the bar with her friends tonight, you couldn't say no. Both because she stated it, not asked you, and that it simply was the least you could do for her. Especially after everything she’s done for you. Before you knew it, you were dressed up in your best (slutty) corset top and cargo pants with some hoops and over exaggerated makeup to accent the look. Xiaoting, as your best roommate and friend, matches with you, and you two make a big scene out of getting ready together; blasting music, doing each other's hair, borrowing each other's clothes, and more.

Xiaoting’s girlfriend Yujin had made herself at home for the pregame, and your mutual friend Hikaru soon followed. With Xiaoting as designated bartender, the four of you mingle, laughing and cracking jokes as the warmth of the alcohol and one another’s presence left you with a warming buzz. Xiaoting was an excellent mixer, and in combination with the chasers Hikaru bought and the drinking games Yujin proposed, you were all ready to go. 

Xiaoting and Yujin led the way, hand in hand as you and Hikaru trailed behind, drunkenly singing into the cold night air as you trek to the nearest bar.

Being a Friday night, the establishment had been as packed as expected, and you all squeezed your way past other visitors as you’re guided to a nearby table. Xiaoting starts off strong, ordering shots for the entire group before utilizing her combined charm alongside her girlfriend’s looks to convince guys to purchase drinks for everyone as well. You couldn’t help but laugh at the way the duo would bat their eyelashes innocently at lone men for drinks– but at least it worked.

Lazily, your eyes wander through the crowd, the alcohol in your system making it a struggle to see straight. Despite your inability to see properly, you still manage to catch a glimpse of your friends from the corner of your eye, and easily spot Yujin attempting to very publicly make out with Xiaoting as Hikaru struggles to pull her away. You stifle a laugh at the sight, and decide to leave the three to their antics whilst you look for someone to talk to.

It's been a while since you last struck up a conversation with a stranger. The last time you had put yourself out there was before you met… 

You shake your head. No. You are not letting your stupid ex ruin your night. Knitting your brows in concentration, you scan the bar. There were plenty of pretty girls to talk to, but you were feeling a little intimidated. Almost all of them came with at least one other person, and you didn’t want to intrude on anything…

 Your eyes landed on a lone blonde at the end of the table, scrolling through her phone with alcohol flushed cheeks. She seemed approachable. Worst case scenario, she simply shoos you off. Taking a deep breath, you approach the blonde, deciding to pull out your best conversation starter.

“Are you chinese? You look chinese!!” You exclaim, suddenly switching to mandarin in the middle of your sentence as you ask the question. Smooth.

The blonde girl looks as if she would’ve been extremely offended at the comment if you didn't just speak to her in her native tongue halfway through your sentence, and she quirks a brow at you, an amused smirk on her lips as she leans against the bar. 

“Yeah, I am! What's a cutie like you doing in a place like this alone??” 

You feel your heart begin to race. So far so good. “I'm not alone!!! My friends are just busy making out with each other and the other is trying to stop them!!” You also lean on the bar, though not as alluring as the blonde before you. More like you partially collapsed and partially slid on it.

She chortles at your response, “well that's not fair to you, leaving you here all alone.”

The sweet and somewhat sultry tone of the blonde makes (non alcohol induced) blush appear on your face as you laugh, “it really isn't! But whatever! My name is y/n by the way!! What's yours??” You scream over the music, sticking your hand out. It was an unexpectedly polite gesture considering your circumstances, and perhaps it may have seemed a bit comical as well with how drunk you were.

She giggles at the response, grabbing your hand then pulling you in, her lips dangerously close to your ear as she yells over the music, “Ning Yizhuo. But call me Ningning! It's cuter!”

You grin. Ningning was a cute nickname. You decided at this very moment you could trust this cute stranger with your life story and personal information she didn’t ask for, and begin to slur out.

“My friends dragged me out here because I was sad over my ex who moved on from me a month after the breakup even though we dated for a year and she's a big jerk for that even though I wish only the best for her but also I hope she dies!!!”

None of the words you spoke just now came out clear, and they seemed to trip over one another when leaving your mouth, but it was enough for the other girl to go from extremely relaxed to suddenly very heated. She stands up straight as her eyebrows knit together.

“To be honest I don’t think she ever really liked me in the first place! I don’t know!! Whatever it doesn’t matter!!!” You continue on, sounding absolutely pathetic as you let yourself feel through the anger you didn’t even know you were repressing, “I was stupid to stay with someone who couldn’t even look me in the eye when saying she loved me!! She was stupid to do the same!! Whatever!! I don’t know!!”

Ningning cuts you off with a raised hand before you can continue, “what the hell?! I hate people like that!!  You're wayyyy too hot to be treated that way! Who is she? What's her name?? I might know her!!”

Against your better drunken judgment, you decide to name drop your ex within a university bar. Because that is always a good idea. “Yu Jimin!! She's a engineering major !!!”

Ningning’s jaw drops as she stares at you, almost as if she were trying to find the correct words for what she has to say next.

“Girl, I know her !!!” She screams out after a brief moment of silence,  “we shared a class together once!! Oh my god I'm so sorry I didn't know she was like that!! You deserve BETTER!” 

Before you could even think of what to say in reaction to that heavy load of information, Ningning grabs your face, pulling you into a kiss. It was a very messy one, her lips almost missing your own during the exchange. Seems like she's not entirely sober either. 

Still, even in your drunken state you knew what to do. Your hands immediately find Ningnings hair as you pull her in closer, and you can feel her smiling as she grazes her tongue over the bottom of your lip. 

You open your mouth to let her in and the only thing that you can think of or even feel for that matter is Ningning and her tongue. She… was really good at this. Jimin never kissed you like this before. Her hands trail down your back to your ass before she squeezes it, smirking when you squirm against her touch.

She breaks the kiss, her face inches away from yours as she breathes out, “you deserve so much better…” Ningning gives you a quick peck on the lips before stepping back, taking in her work with a devilish glint in her eyes. You stare at her dumbfounded for a moment before whipping out your phone, fully talking in your appearance. Your hair and makeup were a wreck. How did all of that happen just now?

“Done by yours truly~” Ningning winks at you, quickly slipping your phone out of your hand and typing something in.

“Wh— Wait what are you doing?”

“Giving you my number, obviously. My girls are gonna wonder where I went.” She hands back your phone and looks at you with soft eyes through her drunken daze. 

“Take care of yourself, yeah?” Ningning kisses you one last time, giving your hand a squeeze before letting go. She disappears into the crowd of partygoers, a sly fox-like grin on her face.

“There you are!” 

You feel an arm land on your shoulder as you jump, twirling around and looking down to see a drunk Hikaru with a slightly less drunk Xiaoting and an absolutely hammered Yujin on her side.

“We should probably head back home!” Xiaoting screams into your ear, “Hikaru’s gonna knock out on the couch and Yujin will be with me!”

Her words barely make it through to you, the music and the alcohol and the adrenaline within your system muffling out every word spoken. Regardless, you still nod and trail behind your friends as you leave, not all too sure what just happened.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

You lay in bed, eyes practically burning holes into the new contact in your phone. “宁宁<3” is what it said. 

So last night wasn’t just a dream. You really did just get a girl's number by doing nothing but spilling your secrets to a stranger. On top of all of that, your head was absolutely killing you, you swore you could feel your heartbeat within your brain. Still, that wasn’t important. Biting your lip, your fingers hover over the contact name. Should you message her? 

y/n [10:59]  — hey !! its y/n, the girl from the bar

y/n [10:59]  — thanks for keeping me company last night :)

ningning [11:06]  — i was wondering if u were gonna text me back

ningning [11:06] — and of course <3 jimin doesn’t know what she lost

y/n [11:08] — haha im flattered

y/n [11:08]  — but u barely know me??

ningning [11:11]  — that can change xx

Your eyes widen as you reread the text over and over again. Is she implying what you think she's implying? What if she's just being friendly? Can you even platonically make out with someone at the bar?

y/n [11:16] — are u asking me out on a date ning yizhuo ?

You wait. 

Oh god. What if she was just being friendly?

ningning [11:18]  — only if youll have me 

You feel yourself blush at her message, burying your face into your pillow as you squeal like a high school teenager in love. It was embarrassing in hindsight, but.. it felt nice to be wanted. 

y/n [11:19] —  of course

ningning [11:19] — perfect <3 

ningning [11:20] — dinner at my place tonight then? 

ningning [11:20] — If youre not too hungover.. 

ningning [11:20] — i got the best hangover cures ;)

you can't help but arch your eyebrow at the winky face she added at the end but brushed it off, more focused on the fact that your drunk hatred towards your ex landed you a date. 

You scramble to your feet and (metaphorically) kick down Xiaoting’s door, abruptly waking the girl from her nap as she screams out, “WO CAO!” She places a hand over her heart as she bolts up within her bed, immediately letting out a sigh of relief when she realizes it was just you. 

“Girl what the HELL is wrong with you?!” She hisses, laying back down and throwing the blanket over her head.

You, being the ever loving and best roommate ever, respond to this by jumping into bed with (on top of) the redhead and squeezing her as tight as you can while screaming “I HAVE A DATE!!!”

Xiaoting shoots back up, your arms still latched onto her torso as she looks down at you, eyes wide. “Wait, are you serious?”

You hear a low groan and a hand slapping your arm as you roll your eyes, slapping the arm back as the voice of Yujin grumbles out and shuffles deeper within the sheets.

Both you and Xiaoting look at one another and giggle before she quietly slips out of bed, quickly placing a kiss on Yujins head before grabbing your arm and leading you out of her room. Once outside, she firmly grasps your shoulders. 

“Okay, now tell me everything.”

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

You nervously stand outside of Ningnings apartment, bag clutched in hand as you look back behind you. Xiaoting sat within her car on the side of the road, keeping an eye on you to make sure this girl wasn’t going to kidnap you or the other.

The two of you (and soon enough Yujin and Hikaru) had spent the day giving you pointers on how to go about the date. They had thrown an ungodly amount of clothes your way as well as telling you endless conversation starters and compliments to give another person. By the end of it all your head was overflowing with information that you were going to forget as soon as you head out the door, and all of your closet was sprawled on your bedroom floor and in the living room. Still, the girls seemed quite proud of their work.

All of you had consecutively agreed on an outfit that was nice, but not too nice. You wore a plaid skirt paired with a simple tank top and an off the shoulder cardigan.

Holding your breath, you ring the doorbell. You really hoped this wasn’t a mistake. When was the last time you were actually on a date with someone? You couldn't remember. After a few moments of silence, you hear shuffling followed by the door unlocking and Ningning poking her head out shyly. Her eyes light up at the sight of you before opening the door completely, revealing her outfit.

She wore an oversized plaid button up, unintentionally matching with your skirt alongside baggy jeans and some bunny slippers you thought were incredibly cute. Her hair was tied up in a messy but charming bun, held up by a hair stick with small gemstones dangling from the end.

This Ningning was completely different from the one you had met at the bar last night. Though, you suppose you were a different person now as well.

“You're here! Come in come in!” She grabs your hand and guides you inside. Flustered, you spare a quick glance behind you, and you can spot the silhouette of Xiaoting throwing a thumbs up from her car before Ningning closes the door behind you.

“You look gorgeous today, by the way,” Ningning compliments, her thumb rubbing over your fingers as she walks you through her apartment. The gesture makes your cheeks warm, and you find yourself easing into her touch like putty. It was a touch that was loving. Kind. Intentional. 

Her home was cozy, with white walls paired alongside warm lighting and paintings and other wall art lining the interior. There was an appetizing aroma that wafted through the air, and you had remembered that Ningning had offered to cook for you.

“What have you prepared for us tonight, chef Ningning?” You ask, squeezing her hand as she grins, “Well it's not much, I'm not a really good cook but I decided to make us some dumplings! A little basic, but it's the only dish I feel like I’ve actually perfected.”

“I hope this is the hangover cure you mentioned” you comment lightheartedly, and you sense a playful energy in the way she looks back at you.

“You'll find out soon enough.”

You once again find yourself quirking a brow at her vague answers, but she simply smiles at you innocently and you find yourself smiling back. It was hard to not be amused by her.

Ningning guides you to the kitchen, which was cleaned perfectly for your arrival. On the center of the table were multiple bamboo steamer baskets, as well as a large tea pot and a simple glass bottle with various native wildflowers as a centerpiece. 

The other girl pulls out a chair for you, and you teasing grin at the polite gesture, “how romantic, Ninging~”

She rolls her eyes and giggles before settling down herself, instantaneously pouring you a cup of tea as she gestures at the baskets, “go on, dig in. I’ll be personally offended if you don’t.”

Chuckling, you open up the baskets, releasing clouds of steam before revealing multiple handmade dumplings with various fillings and differing folding styles. Your eyes widen, and you simply comment, “wow,” before taking the first bite of the food.

To say that it tasted amazing was an understatement– you practically felt like you were thrown back to the motherland with a single bite, and it wasn’t long before you were filling your plate with more.

The two of you had spent the rest of the evening getting to know one another more. You had learned she was a computer science major and going onto her third year of uni, as well as the fact she was from Harbing whilst you shared that you were from Shanghai. 

“Big city girl, huh?” Ningning amusedly comments, sipping on her tea as you roll your eyes, “yeah… But I'm not rich or anything before you ask.”

The blonde feigns rejection as she snaps her fingers, “damn. I was gonna ask you to buy drinks next time we head to the bars, I think you owe me. ” She smiles at you, and it's warm.

You liked this. You liked how easy it was to talk to her. It was never this easy before.

Soon enough you had ended up on Ningning’s couch, browsing through movies aimlessly as the hefty meal threatened to send you into a food coma. The blonde lay comfortably in your arms underneath a blanket, her eyes occasionally fluttering shut as you continued to search for something to watch.

“Hmm, what about… Velocipastor?” The name completely throws you off guard, prompting you to click on it, skimming over the description as you feel the vibration of Ninging lazily humming beneath you. 

“Oh that movie is really good, trust me.”

“... Really? Are you sure, Ning?”

“Yeah yeah…” Her eyes were already shut as she spoke, nuzzling in closer to you as you chuckle, putting on the movie as you wrap your arms around her, pulling her in closer. 

Honestly, the movie seemed to be an excuse for the girl to be physically close to you– maybe get a nap in? You weren’t even sure if she was watching the movie at this point. Still, maybe it was for the best. Velocipastor was definitely not well funded within its production, that much could be seen. Plus, you couldn't complain about having a cute girl in your arms.

“Does your head still hurt?”

Ningning’s soft voice rings out, startling you. Honestly, you were getting pretty invested in the film, you had thought she already fell asleep.

“Mmm, a little. I don’t think your hangover cure worked.”

“Oh, the dumplings weren’t the cure.”

Your head cocks to the side as you tear your gaze away from the tv screen, looking down at the girl nestled on your chest as she looks back up at you. There was that all too familiar glint in her eyes again.

“Then what is?”

A mischievous grin curls on her lips before she leans in, connecting her lips with yours. Still a bit sluggish from the night before alongside a hefty meal, her kissing was a bit sloppy, but it was soft. Much softer than before.

You feel yourself almost immediately sigh into the kiss, and you would have found it embarrassing if she didnt guide her hand up your chest, to your neck, and into your hair, soon deepening the kiss. 

Not expecting things to escalate so soon, you couldn’t help but let out a soft whimper as your hands landed on her hips, nails digging into her sides desperately as she laughs against your lips, pulling back. 

“You’re really cute, y’know?” She purrs, using her hand to brush a strand of hair out of your face, and you can see the hint of pink spread across her lips as she smiles, drinking in the sight of you.

Before you even have a chance to respond, Ningning tackles your jawline, trailing kisses down your face and onto your neck. You try to respond, but when she starts to nip the side of your neck, the words you wanted to say somehow managed to melt into complete mush.

“Mmhmmhgh…” 

The sound that escapes your lips allows you the chance to actually feel embarrassed, and you slam a hand over your lips, looking away from Ninging. Your response elicits another laugh from the blonde, and you swear you could listen to the sound forever. 

Her symphony soon quiets though, and Ningning looks you straight in the eye, her gaze softening as she opens her mouth, struggling to find the right words to say.

“Look, I know we just met…” she trails off for a moment, almost a bit shy to continue, “but if you want to give me a chance and see where this goes, I promise I’ll treat you so well.” 

Her eyes are filled with genuine desire for you, and you couldn’t help but feel… Isolated? Targetted? For the first time you feel like you’re seen, and you don’t know what to do about it.

She presses on, “I’d really like to see you again, and I know you’re going through a lot right now but I want to be there with you every step of the way. I want to see where this takes us.”

“I want you, y/n.”

Your face heats up instantaneously, and you swear your eyes were threatening to bulge out of your skull right then and there. You look at her in silence as you struggle to find your words, and after a few seconds you finally croak out,

“I… I want to see where this takes us too, Ningning.”

Her eyes brighten at your response, and she beams, pulling you into a tight hug on the couch before interlocking her lips with yours once again. You giggle into the kiss, and throw the blanket over the two of you as the movie on the tv buzzed on. For the first time, you found someone warm enough for you.

[moonlightspencie]

part 2 of the fake dating!james drabble as suggested by @simp-for-fiction!

part 1 here : part 2

pairing: james potter x reader

——————————

It had been two weeks since the night he kissed you and then proceeded to pretend as if he hadn't. You really couldn't blame him considering that you had also been hesitant to bring it up. After all, it was a part of the act.

But then again, it felt so real.

He was dragging you to yet another event today, telling you to dress nice. You complained, of course, but the second he mentioned that you'd be getting a nice fancy dinner for free... who were you to turn down such a compelling evening?

You showed up at his flat in your sleek black evening gown, feeling quite pretty, and knocked on his door. He opened it a moment later, looking a bit frazzled: his hair was a mess, his tie undone, and his glasses absent from his face.

"...hey?" you greeted.

"Hi," he replied quickly, ushering you inside before scurrying through the flat. "Sorry, promise I'll be done soon!"

"You okay?" you asked hesitantly, following him to his room.

He shuffled through things in his room, spraying himself with cologne and trying to smooth out his hair.

"Fine. Just... maybe, accidentally fell asleep and only started getting ready fifteen minutes ago," he winced a little.

You snorted a laugh. "Alright, that's fine. Do we need to be there right on time?"

"No... I guess we don't, but," he sighed, finally taking a good look at you. "You showed up on time looking... beautiful. The least I can do is get you there when I said I would."

"James, we've known each other for years. I'm not exactly expecting you to turn things around for a girl you're pretending to date."

He smiled sheepishly. "Yeah, I guess that's true. Still, though."

"Don't worry about it," you reiterated, sitting on his bed.

He continued getting ready, now quite a bit less frazzled, and you were on your way before you knew it. He led you inside some charity event that he'd been invited to. You knew his family was rich, but this... this was something else.

"So... Lily is gonna be here?" you ask in a bit of surprise as he walked you through the ballroom.

"No," he replied simply, bringing you to sit at a table with little place-cards indicating your seats.

You furrowed your brow. "What... then, why are we here?"

"Photos, of course. They go in the Prophet. Evans will see them, and hopefully get jealous."

"Thats a pretty elaborate plan, Potter."

"It'll work," he said, waving off your concerns. "Don't worry, I know what I'm doing here."

You snorted, but didn't really feel like complaining the second the food and drinks came out. Even more, you were perfectly happy once dancing began. It felt like a really fancy school ball with a bunch of people who were much more intimidating than your classmates. But... James made it easy.

"And spin," he instructed with a laugh, twirling you around. He caught you, pulling you into his chest again. "See? You're a natural."

"Far from it," you laughed. "If it weren't for you, I'd be tripping over my own two feet."

"Nah. You're great," he smiled brightly, annoyingly charming as always.

"I didn't grow up with this stuff. You dont have to lie to make me feel better."

"I'm not lying. Swear. You're good."

You smiled a little, shaking your head. "You know, we should really hang out more. I think I like hanging out with you when I'm not being paraded around for you to get Lily's attention the whole time."

"We hang out," he said, tilting his head a little.

"Not really," you smiled a little. "I hang out with Remus and Sirius, and... sometimes you're just there. I wouldn't quantify us as friends, per se."

"I would. Per se," he snorted a laugh. "We are now at least."

"Maybe."

"Don't maybe me," he laughed cheerfully.

You chuckled right back, about to respond when a flash went off. You blinked, looking in the direction of the light.

An older man who looked far too happy with himself, held up his camera. "Beautiful young couple! That will make a lovely photo for the papers."

"Oh, we're not--"

James cut you off. "Thank you! We've been told."

"Oh," you nodded a little. Right. This was the whole point of the event.

The photographer gave you another overly-peppy grin, then bid you adieu. You glanced at James.

"You really think she'll see that?"

"Everyone will see it," he shrugged.

"Everyone?" you swallowed. "Ugh. James, I don't know if that's a good thing. For everyone to think we're..."

"What, am I not enough for you?" he teased.

"That's not what I mean, James. It's just that people talk. Do we really need a public break up from a relationship we were never in."

"Eh," he shrugged. "We'll burn that bridge when we get to it."

"It's supposed to be cross that bridge."

"Either way," he grinned.

"Quit worrying," he kissed your cheek. "Now, come on. We have the whole rest of the night to have fun together, now."

"Right. Lead the way, Potter."

[kcrossvine-art]

hi birds of paradise and of prey! I sincerely hope your 2024 has been kind to you so far, and if it hasn't, I hope it starts being fucking nicer soon. We got eyes on it and are ready to take it out should it fail.

I'm coming to the end of my list here soon, so if anyone has ideas on what they'd like to see next, please do hit me up! Even if its just a piece of media with interesting food in it and not a specific dish you wanna see. My roommate got me a recipe book from that TikTok fantasy tavern guy, "recipes from the lucky gryphon"? So we could also take a shot at a few of those, although im not really familiar with his work. Regardless-

We will be making Stuffed Cabbage from Lord of the Rings Online today!

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes in to this Stuffed Cabbage?” YOU MIGHT ASKYou cant kinda put whatever you want for seasonings and even the meat filling. I used ground beef but pork and lamb are also stellar candidates.

Yellow onion

Garlic

2 eggs

Ground beef

Rice

A head of cabbage

Oregano

Thyme

Red pepper flakes

Cumin

Crushed tomato

Tomato sauce

AND, “what does this Stuffed Cabbage taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASKBa bawsa

Very, very filling wow

2 rolls filled me up for a meal and i made about 20-ish from one head of cabage

A bit plain tbh, the texture is great but I'd really double up on the seasonings

A blank canvas for you to impart your spice preferences onto

Reheating makes it taste almost identical to fresh

Would pair well with a hot sauce dip

could also go well with an artichoke dip

If you run out of room and need to layer the rolls, I'd try experimenting with pouring some of the crushed tomato and sauce inbetween the stacked rolls. Otherwise the ones at the bottom lack a lot of the tomato flavor. However it might make the bottoms on the rolls laying ontop soggy?

. Where rice called for, used long grain white rice

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I've never blanched anything before. Theres not much western food that calls for it, meanwhile whenever my friend from malaysia shows a dish they ate, 9 times out of 10 the vegetables are blanched. Much easier process than the fancy name might suggest- boil water and dunk the thing in until its done. Whatever 'done' may be for the thing you are cooking.

Also for the ground beef (or whichever meat you use) you don't have to cook it beforehand, but in doing two tries at making these cabbage rolls i would recommend you at least season your meat before mixing it with everything else. The meat will cook to a safe temperature inside the cabbage rolls, i just prefer the taste and texture of it when cooked twice.

I give this recipe a meandering 7/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) I want to review more horrible recipes, truly i do, so that the rating scale isnt always a 6 and above, but whenever i try something horrible its like "why the fuck would i put all the effort into making and sharing a review of this thing i Do Not Want others to eat????" yknow?? Would people be interested in roasting horrible recipes? 

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

1 yellow onion

6 cloves of garlic

2 eggs

2 lbs ground beef

1 1/2 cup cooked rice

1 large head of cabbage

28oz crushed tomato

14oz tomato sauce

Oregano

Thyme

Red pepper flakes

Cumin

Salt/pepper

Method:

Saute garlic and onion in butter over medium heat until onions are caramelized. When done, remove from heat and let cool.

Season the beef to your liking with cumin, red pepper, and salt. Very, very lightly cook the beef in the same pan used for the garlic and onions. Cook until it starts to brown, but dont let it darken. 

Beat eggs thoroughly with oregano, thyme, salt, and pepper.

Add all of the above ingredients together in a bowl with (cooked!) rice. Mix thoroughly then cover and let rest in the fridge.

Core and blanche your cabbage in boiling water, peeling them off as they become limp.

Once you've separated all the leaves, cut off any thick stems that would prevent the leaf from folding.

Put roughly 2 tablespoons of meat filling into each leaf. Fold the sides of the leaf inwards and roll it up. Place each cabbage roll seam-down into a casserole dish.

If they don't all fit in one layer, its more than okay to stack. Try not to stack more than 2 layers though.

Once you've used all the cabbage, take your can of tomatos and pour them over the rolls. Mix some oregano into the tomato sauce and pour that over the rolls as well.

Bake uncovered in the oven at 350 for about 2 hours. Dont worry if a bit of tomato on top looks burnt.

IF REHEATING LEFTOVERS: Bake 10 cabbage rolls in the oven at 320 for about 40 minutes. Reduce time for less rolls.

[lilacstro]

私はスター//⭐watashi wa star ⭐pac: how can you embrace your main character energy this leo season

happy leo season y'all <3 (July 23 to about August 22). This song has such a major Leo energy dont come after me frfr. So, this pac is inspired by the energy that we NEED to embody this Leo season... even from the corner of your room if that is where you are 24/7

I GET MONEY I AM STAR STAR STAR (the affirmations go hard lol)

also I saw the Sun card peak out in every pile while shuffling so that just makes it even better haha.

paid readings are open<3

decks used: spirits speak tarot and affirmation oracle.

choose a pile:)

pile 1 pile 2 pile 3

support me on ko-fi :)

Pile 1

I think you guys already have or will get some extra favors from people. It is surprising because I have an eight card tarot spread but I do not understand how it just became 10 tarot card spread. I think the very first message I am getting VERY clearly is connecting to your inside, yourself. Listening to your self. Pouring the cup of love you pour on others all inside yourself. Embody that divine feminine, wear that sexy black dress. Lyrics from Kehlani's song Good thing " I make myself up to dance in the mirror when I am at home" I would also suggest leaving away stagnant feeling, emotions and resentment. I see 111 as I am saying this. I would suggest writing all of this down and burning it away. DO NOT give your energy to what drains you, leave it behind. I would also suggest trying not to invest energy at multiple places at once and burning yourself out totally. Do not hurry or be restless, relax!! If you guys are wanting to start something new, learn something new, especially if some marketable skill, please do. Also, you can do ANYTHING you desire, anything you set your mind to. You can start from scratch and build all the way up to being a skilled person. Also, do not mind opinions, or embarrassment or being cringe etc, be open to embrace yourself, or even look like a fool, literally all you need is you. Pile 1 , "your give a fucks should be on vacation" lol. You are going to move so swiftly and so far if you leave all your burden behind that is not needed. Put your focus on things you can hold, feel balanced and keep your faith on things you are doing and you would see your confidence go>>>>> You guys do have some special energy since I see you getting that one special card I wrote out of feeling for this affirmation deck I have. Also please blast loud music that makes you feel like yourself, that is something I was picking up

Affirmations you can speak to yourself this month: 1. I am at peace with my past 2. I am divine 3. I open my heart to love 4. I go with the flow and feel my connection to the stream of life

Pile 2

Boy you guys already SHINEEE. you also have the OG sun card come out what can I say. There is some attractive, vibrant nature to you, something shiny and sparkly about you. Now, I feel it would be a really good idea to wear some extroverted energy, or at least for a little while, and go out and show what you have got. I remember Olivia Rodrigo once saying " you can be extremely talented, but if you do not show up, what's the point". I have feeling that some of you might want to start a YouTube channel, cover channel or maybe even put your music out. No better time than now. If you guys have partners, the more you shine, you would brighten up them too. You guys are shining together!! and if you are not in a relationship, opening yourself, and letting yourself just be can attract you someone on a similar vibration to you. So what is the message we get? Embody the person and vibration you love. Choose peace over unnecessary drama and thrill, and you would see your light not getting dim. Express yourself and your emotions to people, talk to people, find new things and hobbies you may like, invest your time in doing things. Try multiple new things, unlike Pile 1 who felt more like having a one track mind and finding something they really enjoy from what they are already doing, you should infact find many things you like and occupy yourself, and find yourself and let yourself out is what I mean. YOU SHINEEE.

Affirmations you can speak to yourself this month:( I see 1333 as I type.)

1.I maintain alignment with my source energy 2. I silence my mind and listen intently 3.I follow my bliss (literally told y'all to let yourself out and try new things and people who you may match with vibration you embody) 4.I forgive myself and set myself free

Pile 3

Ok, the very first clear message for you Pile 3, is separating yourself from chaos. There is also a message of opening yourself up, to give and receive, but both should be aligned to your will, who you want to entertain, what do you want to entertain and what do you want in return. Don't close yourself off, to neither giving or receiving, but be extremely mindful. Set boundaries. If you guys have a lot of overwhelming energy or draining interactions, step back and look inwards, look inside. There is also a message that you guys may spiral over things at times, maybe that is a habit, a person or situation, maybe even a bad sleep schedule for some of you, you indeed need to move past such habits. To tie it all down for you, your main character energy would come when you shine on the inside, and recognize it too. You can get whatever you want, I think if you guys have something you want to work towards or focus on, do it quietly and in serenity. Embody a comfortable energy. Your energy is the blanket your soul, spirit and body wear, and that energy originates inside you. Wear a comfortable skin, if you do not want to socialize, it is fine, you are not obliged to. If you guys are wanting to manifest something, visualizing and feeling it, especially before bed is a nice idea. Also, try maintaining inner peace and reflect, meditation would be a really good idea. So, in summary, you can embody your main character energy when you let your guards down, de puff your chest and create a serene environment for you to be in. I had the Sun card almost falling out, after which Moon came out, and it makes me think, you have two sides to yourself, and you do not need to embody the sun at night, choose your persona and what you want, who you want to give to. Balance the two sides inside and let them out at your comfort, this adaptability is your super power if used right.

Affirmations you can speak to yourself this month:

1.I am safe in the universe, all life loves and supports me 2.with clarity of mind feel abundance and worthiness coming through 3.I open my heart to love 4. I live in the paradise of my own creation (this adds meaning to both choosing your persona, your people, manifesting and even the message of turning inwards 5.my heart is overflowing with joy

[goomyloid]

PLEASE explain your thoughts on kriselle in full detail

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS 100% UNPROMPTED ASK! I SHALL EXPLAIN

i hate toby fox. why did he do this to us. he really put it better than anyone else. not really romantic not really platonic but…. something else… some secret more sinister more heartfelt more absurd third thing

i wonder at what point should i clarify that i dont even really seek out kriselle in a romantic context… DONT GET ME WRONG i have zero issues with the ship whatsoever and all of the krisellers out there are living their best (most painful) lives and i SEE THE APPEAL. BUT when i rotate them in my brain i dont need them to kiss or anything like that i just need them to sit down and sadly hold hands and stay like that forever and ever. in case you couldnt gauge that from my art so far

tldr i dont think i ship them in the traditional sense at least …. the things that i usually fixate on for any romantic ship are not there with these two. there are no romantic feelings there In my mind. and all at the same time i start screaming and throwing up and killing myself (all positive) whenever i see them even in the same image together. hngh

ive tried explaining this to people before and they usually suggest something along the lines of a QPR and even that doesnt feel right to me. truly the best way i can put it is… that red string of fate man… which i almost hesitate on saying too because i dont actually know if noelle is Quite an important enough character to the story to warrant a connection like that. WHICH IS A CRAZY THING TO SAY. I KNOW. DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT GETTING ME WRONG i think dess and her connections to gaster and her usage as a stepping stone into the weird route are all VERY important… but in my brain its just not kris/knight/asriel/every other mysterious main focus of the story Important. i didnt mean to get into deltarune theorizing here i hope nobody’s blood is boiling rn

so yeah in the end. toby fox once again put it best. they are friends, but they are also something else.

back to the actual pairing though… sometimes i think im going overboard and overestimating how close kris and noelle were as children because noelle will go and say things like “i wonder if we were ever really friends at all.” which is kind of a fair statement considering the circumstances. sure they played together and all and tagged along with their siblings to do stuff together but when dess went missing… it all kind of stopped. kris is just a kid, they dont know what to do or even how to process it, much like noelle. asriel is probably dealing with his own feelings, he just lost his friend and likely old enough to understand the weight of what happened. while noelle and kris cant say much to each other at all.

im always back and forth on speaking headcanons for kris but the one that i always seem to come back to is selective mutism… to me kris had a lot of trouble communicating well as a child and could only grow comfortable around certain people, asriel and noelle being clear examples because they’re both so patient with them. maybe because of this noelle felt like they could understand each other without really needing words, and just physical interaction was enough to achieve some form of closeness… or maybe that was all just on her end, she thinks when kris goes to play the piano. but if that’s the case, why does it feel like a concert just for her…?

jesus dont even get me start on them as teenagers either. noelle has lost her sister, and now kris has lost their brother… but not in the same way. they look at each other and wonder if they’re the same now. or, maybe thats too cruel. maybe its not the same thing at all. asriel’s coming back soon, after all. it will all be over soon, kris won’t have to feel this way for much longer, right? so then, why does kris look so miserable, sitting in the corner over there? all noelle feels like she can do is sit next to them quietly. to be there, and to somehow, vaguely, messily help each other. the misfit kids that dont really know how to talk to each other and yet understand each other regardless

thats why the dark world feels like such a dream to her. these crazy city lights, fantastical creatures, susie’s there, and she actually might have the means to defend herself and stand her ground, whether it be verbally or… otherwise

and most of all, much like with kris offering an adventurous haven to susie in ch1, the same is extended to noelle. by kris’s side, no less. it feels like theyre doing things together again, and its fun, and nostalgic… she wants to bring dess. and i think its okay to assume kris wants to bring asriel, too. recreating the make-believe world they lost so long ago… is it really possible?

no… how can it really be possible, when this isnt kris? something is wrong. its almost perfect, except kris… it’s them, but it’s not. she sees their face, their expressions, their laughs, their worries. and yet the voice that comes from them… isnt them. and it scares her! even if nothing particularly bad happened as a result. and if something bad DID happen, well…

she just wants what they had before back. is it really so impossible? can they reconcile after all these years? does kris want to? is kris capable of doing so? maybe they just need to hug again. will it feel like a real hug? the person she thought she understood is acting in ways she doesnt understand. they’re telling her to do weird things. they cycle through actions as if they just want to know what happens. and they cant even play piano anymore.

[stxrvel]

gym time

summary: you didn't expect to meet someone like Bucky Barnes when you decided to enter the gym, especially since his looks and words were anything but friendly.

pairing: au!bucky barnes x f!reader

words: +1k

warning: uhm, descriptions of bucky working out? some bad words. also i suck at summaries but what i was trying to say is that bucky is very suggestive here, and there will be suggestive conversations iykwim. this chapter doesn't contain too much of that but still minors do not interact!!!!

note: hi guys! um, i dont know what to say. being honest idk why i wrote this when i dont know if i'll ever be able to continue it, i think it was for the joy or fun in it and maybe trying to test new things? i kind of wrote the draft for a second part but i dont think i want this one to be a series, i wanted to see it like a drabble but i got carried away and now there are too many words. but what i do know now is that i will be pleased to write drabbles in a scenario like this, like in this universe or au. if you guys liked this (which i hope so) would you mind sending me what would you like to see next? only time will tell how good i'm doing but i hope i can at least entertain you a little. anyway, looking forward to your opinions and i really hope you like this one! since it's my first time writing in this kind of genre :'(

You were at the gym. It had been barely a week since you had started with the goal of creating a routine in your life, because work was consuming you from the inside out. Coming home no longer felt like it used to, when you still had the fever of being independent and being able to get yourself everything you wanted. Adult life really was a mud puddle compared to what we always thought as kids.

So… yeah, you decided to join the gym closest to your apartment to try to change your bad procrastination habits a bit. Maybe now that you were paying for it with your own money you'd feel more like going, just for the sake of not making the money go to waste. But, hey, it was something.

During that week everything had been relatively fine. You hadn't had any problems with anyone, no awkward comments and you had gotten some workout partners to take turns lifting weights or running on the treadmills with at the same time.

It was honestly becoming your favorite place to be after work.

And, well, of course, there was him.

The man you shared end-to-end glances with at the gym. He never came close, always kept his space, unless he had to use some machine near where you were.

He looked like a decent man… and definitely sexy. But you didn't dare get close even though it seemed to be the only thing the two of you wanted to do. The furtive glances weren't even accidental anymore, you both sought each other out through the masses of air as if it was second nature to you. And that upset you too much because it hadn't been too many days, how could you feel so passionate and heated just sharing glances with a stranger? Within what you didn't know there might be something you didn't like, even.

Anyway, you had to avert your gaze each time before it became too much, but it always seemed like it wasn't enough for the people around you not to notice.

“Why don't you just go talk to him?” Veronica spoke in front of you, waiting for Erika to leave the press to start her series.

You were on the treadmill finishing your routine that day and that man was on the other side of the gym, lifting weights like they were nothing. You had watched him for so long without embarrassment that you had almost memorized every line of his massive arms. And your partners that day had definitely noticed.

“I don't think it's appropriate,” was all you could think of.

Erika snorted, lowering her legs as she put down the weights. “She's afraid the sexual tension surrounding them will suffocate her.”

“Erika!” you scowled at her. “Stop talking nonsense.”

“I'm of the same opinion as Veronica, you should just go talk to him. If it turns out his personality isn't as sexy as his body, you're not going to lose anything and you're going to gain a lot.”

Veronica, who had already settled into the press after Erika cleaned the chair, nodded animatedly at her partner's words.

You turned your head to look at him again, just as his strong hands released the weight that bounced to the floor. You saw him shake his arms slightly and move his shoulders in circles, releasing the tension a little at a time. Even in the distance you could make out as if he were right beside you the line of his veins running around his arms and the-

“Look at her, she's drooling already.”

You clicked your tongue and Erika only shared a chuckle with Veronica. You decided to focus solely on getting the treadmill over with quickly so you could get through that day.

-

You came out of the shower with an incredible freshness dancing in your body. In the bathrooms the atmosphere was always a little cooler than in the center of the gym, so the time after the bath was one of your favorites. Veronica and Erika had already left, they had said goodbye before you entered the shower. They always left at seven o'clock at night, but you preferred to stay a little longer and enjoy the showers you paid for because you didn't have much to do at home when you got there.

With the towel over your right shoulder you walked towards the lockers to get your training bag and other belongings. You thought for a moment about leaving a few things from your bag since there would be a zumba class early tomorrow morning and maybe you were getting a little interested in going, when you heard some footsteps close to where you were.

There shouldn't have been too many people left in the gym at that time because closing time was at 8:00 p.m., so someone else must have gotten out of the shower to get their belongings just like you.

You decided to leave a few things in the locker for the next day's class, encouraging you a little more to leave the house a little earlier. Anyway, you knew Veronica would be there so you wouldn't be alone.

You pulled out the bag with the things you were going to take with you and closed the locker. You turned around to leave, when you finally realized who else had come in after you.

It was him. It was that man.

You had never met him in the evenings. He always left before seven o'clock so you never had the chance to meet him alone until that moment, when you stopped dead in front of him, your sneakers grinding against the floor as if you had braked violently at fifty kilometers per hour.

Your locker was all the way in the left corner of that room and it looked like his was a few spaces away from yours in the same direction, closer to the door.

His gaze lifted in your direction at the sound of your shoes and you had to squeeze your bag strap tightly over your shoulder, eating your embarrassment fiercely.

“Hey,” he spoke first and his voice was nothing like you had imagined.

It was incredibly better. His baritone tone, somewhat raspy and light, sounded like he didn't have a care in the world. The way he slightly curved his lips sent an electric sensation throughout your body. He had given you that smile before, but at that proximity it was a whole new experience. It seemed like your body began to vibrate on another frequency.

“How did you like the gym?”

“Uh?”

The man turned back to you, closing his locker almost at the same time and leaning his shoulder against it in the most smooth way you'd ever seen, handling his body with a confidence that almost made you feel intimidated.

“You're new here, aren't you?”

“Ah, yes,” you nodded slightly, again feeling that embarrassment make its way from your throat. “I've really liked the gym, I've felt very comfortable thankfully. And the monthly plans are very good, affordable.”

The man nodded attentively at your words, as you tried to keep your composure under his sharp gaze.

“I'm Bucky,” he suddenly introduced himself, stepping a little closer to where you stood.

“I'm Y/N,” you kept your voice steady as you raised your hand to meet his that had just extended in front of you at a safe distance. “A pleasure.”

“The pleasure's all mine,” Bucky gave your hand a good shake, causing things in your body that you were too embarrassed to admit. You didn't know if your cheeks could get flushed, but at that moment you felt like they looked cartoonish, vibrant red and hot. “And I'm glad to hear you're comfortable. I do my best to make my clients happy.”

“Oh…?”

Even though you felt spellbound under the piercing fierceness of those blue eyes, your ears were still working enough to allow your head to process what you'd heard.

“You're the owner?”

Bucky nodded and you wanted to hide your head in a hole for a moment.

So you'd been eye-fucking the owner of the gym? Hell, now that you thought about it more clearly, it could even be that this man was older than you, much older.

Oh no, the things you had to go through for not being a little more prudent. Good thing that embarrassing moment would only be in your head.

“And now that you know, you can drop any complaints or recommendations directly to me, if you want.”

You let out a short laugh, trying to cut through the awkwardness you felt inside as you realized the situation you were in.

“Sure, yeah, anything I need to tell you I'll do it personally.”

“Also if you want me to change something… give you something or do something, you can tell me.”

“Sure,” you nodded quickly, starting to move around him to get closer to the exit. Bucky wouldn't take his eyes off you. “Now I know I'm counting on you for anything…. From the gym, that is.”

Your awkward laugh died under his intense but amused gaze. Was he enjoying it?

“And you can talk to me, if you want too,” Bucky continued speaking as you completely surrounded him and now found yourself in the position he had been before, “not just watching me from afar.”

You were sure the blood had left your face by this time. Your level of embarrassment had gone over the edge and in that instant you didn't know how to do anything but look at him as if he had caught you in the middle of a crime. You tightened the strap of your bag while holding your breath as you noticed him moving a little closer towards you.

“It's not that it bothers me, don't go thinking that. It's just that… I'd like to get to know you a little more if that's possible.”

“Uhm…” you mumbled with a dry mouth, the reflection of the light in his blue eyes much clearer against the short distance between the two of you. You passed saliva with difficulty, shaking your head to answer him, “Yeah, sure. I'd like to know you too.”

You watched out of the corner of your eye as he nodded at your words, not making a move to get any closer. If that five-foot distance alone already felt like you were suffocating, you didn't want to imagine what it would be like to have him standing to the side or behind you explaining how to do some exercise even though you already knew how to do them all…

Shit.

“See you then, doll.”

He walked around you, walking away from that conversation and that tension like it was nothing, like a bomb hadn't just exploded in front of you. You couldn't even say anything goodbye to him, you didn't know in that instant how to move your mouth.

For a moment you felt so foolish for allowing yourself to show yourself in such a vulnerable way in front of a man… but, at the same time, so much had happened since the last time you had actively flirted with one of them (even though what you had done at that moment had been spitting words). You'd barely had a taste to remember what the adrenaline, excitement and anticipation of having a truly fun night was like… that you didn't plan on letting go.

Bucky had thrown you that rope and you were sure you were going to take it.

-

a/n: thank you for reading!! <3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

aita for flirting with my online friend 🌐❓

i (20s, trans man) have been getting closer to my online friend (same as me). we were mutuals for a while in what i can best describe as an online writing community but only started actually talking last year when i approached him to do a project together. we've been pretty strictly platonic for the last year but this year it's ramped up a bit (in part i think due to greater proximity)- we make a lot of sexual jokes at each other. now that's not necessarily a big deal because we do it at other male (and not male in his case) friends of ours, its just sort of how our circle interacts with each other, but it's a bit different for me because i do actually have somewhat of a crush on him. i'm not super sure of how he feels towards me, but i do think he knows at least partially how i feel and is at least humouring our banter.

now here's where i feel like an asshole. i have no intention of dating him at all- even if he does like me back, the reality is that we live on two entirely separate continents and neither of us have the financial means to go see each other. now you could suggest we date long distance or online but i've done that like 4 different times now with 4 different people and i just know it doesn't work for me, for a variety of reasons i won't get into. just trust me when i say it would end poorly. i'm not on speaking terms with any of my exes (nor do i want to be, bar one) and my friend is important enough to me that if we ended up like that then i'd be really upset about it. usually when i break up with someone or am broken up with i'm left with a lot of resentment and bitterness. plus our writing project would be tanked, which i'm not willing to jeopardise because i think it's excellent, he's a great partner.

in addition to that i'm only a few months out of a pretty rough breakup with someone i also had viewed as a close friend (irl, not online). i'm not conflating them here, because they aren't alike whatsoever, but i worry that im using my friend as an emotional rebound to cope with what my ex did to me, even if he doesn't know it. i don't want my ex back and i am honestly still feeling a lot of anger towards him, so it's been nice putting my attention and libido elsewhere. however i know how shitty it feels to be someone else's rebound guy and would hate to do that to my friend. plus i could be stunting my own healing progress?? idk

it initially was just a bit of fun but i've had to privately and seriously talk myself down from getting jealous as fuck when my friend has had other people jokingly (or not jokingly, who knows) flirt with him. i'm a pretty intense person (hi, bpd) so i've been trying to reign myself back and keep things chill and funny between us but i'm getting kind of concerned whether i should stop entirely so my feelings go away or if im fine enjoying giving and being given attention in return, even if it doesn't lead anywhere. even just liking him is kind of breaking three of the rules i'd set for myself after my last few relationship disasters (no more online stuff, no more white boys, let my brain cool down and dont be interested in anyone for at least a year) so i kind of just don't know where i should be taking this if anywhere

[deliriumbubbles]

After all the discourse about who was "more" wrong, It's exciting to see Apology Tour put the foot down and remind us that this is Blitzo's story. It's about how he changes and grows. It's not about just letting it go because we know he hates himself. You actually have to take steps toward improvement, and that's really fucking hard to do.

Are there psychiatrists in Hell? Cognative Behavioral Therapy?

So first off, anyone who was dying for Blitzo to be the one sending tons of text messages and coming back trying to talk to Stolas, congrats because he's definitely doing that. And annoying the crap out of Stolas and just hurting him more every time he talks to him because he keeps trying to make them revert their relationship BACK to "I'm just here as part of a transactional fucking." The big problem between them, that he can't believe that Stolas would like him even though Stolas has told him multiple times by now, remains because it's not something he can just hear once and get over.

Moreover, this is his story, so he's just going to say more hurtful things, but Stolas at least, this time, manages to use his own words (likely bc he's not triggered at that point and has some defenses up), and is able to tell Blitzo that his words are hurtful. Instead of magicking him out. Because Blitzo would just pop back over the wall.

So we get a brief, humorous montage of Blitzo going around and apologizing to everyone and not meaning it and he ends up at the Fuck Blitzo party and by degrees, and after Stolas singing a song that suggests that he still kind of blames himself for being foolish and thinking Blitzo cared, it does start to sink in and they talk a bit.

Interesting that this is the first time Blitzo has SEEN Stolas knocking it back because we the audience know he does this kinda regularly. Along with his own damn meds. Geez, these guys.

I also like that they didn't have to villainize Verosika in their conversation. She got hurt because it seems like their relationship was going pretty well until she let an ilu slip and that just sets Blitzo off because he can never believe that. It's like being compliment shy to a million degrees. And so he turned on her, he hurt her, on purpose, and she's angry because of what he did but also because he acts like it's her fault.

IS this party a monument to pettiness? Oh fuck yeah, it is. Maybe people should just learn to let go. I dont' think that's her entire career, but now whenever they're near each other, they both snipe at each other because she was hurt and doesn't feel like forgiving him when he's not sorry. But it was a good conversation between them. Blitzo hit another milestone, admitting out loud that he doesn't want to have to be like this forever. He does it deliberately, and it doesn't excuse it, but he's seeking change. He had to get here before moving forward.

So. Now he's had "a fucking minute" to process what Stolas said, has said, keeps on saying. He's heard that Stolas craves someone to love and want him. It's out there that Blitzo stopped Striker the first time. Unspoken things are moving forward.

I heard people fussing about this being their make up episode, but given the next ep (which probably will be in October), Blitzo needs to be at a low before he starts turning things around. It's his show and more than anything, the arc with Stolas is highlighting how he can't accept good things happening to him.

Stolas still has things he needs to work on as well. Highlighted in this episode is getting a more realistic sense of what romance is kind of like because he's basically a babygay rn. He doesn't have to have another full on relationship to realize that other people could want him. It could happen, but it's not necessary. He just has to recognize that he's not unlovable. That's not the problem with Blitzo. And for him to heal from his father and Stella he does need a little more experience.

Headcanon for me: Stolas and Verosika are gonna be besties after this until I'm proven otherwise.

[chiiyuuvv]

Hey~

I was wondering if you'd be able to write how xiker's members would react to y/n being insecure about being very chubby/ very slim (still healthy tho) to the point where y/n would want to change herself (but because she's insecure about how others see her and not because she really want's to) and how the boy's would comfort her, what they'd do etc.

You can choose whether you'd like to do it as a headcanon, imagine or anything else!

Thank you!💚🦊

WHEN YOU THINK YOU'RE OVERWEIGHT

• PAIRING — bf!xikers x gn reader (uses some she)

• GENRE — comfort, fluff, i dont think i implied the angst, comfort, comfort, comfort

• WORD COUNT — 758

• AUTHOR'S NOTE — i am so, so, so sorry about the long wait. True was, me and my team had no idea what to write 😭 but after looking up some coping skills, we got to writing. I just wanna say that you are beautiful just the way you are, fuck other people. And if you dont believe me, xikers certainly will ♡

MASTERLIST! – JOIN THE TAGLIST!

MINJAE ☆

Minjae could see on your phone various workout methods that guarantees losing lots of weight in 2 weeks or so

Was a little confused on why you were so interested in that so he decided to comfort you

It broke his heart when you kept calling yourself fat and chubby bc what?? No you arent

And since he knew the workout methods and supplements were a scam, he suggested that you worked out with him

Praises every little thing you do with a big hug and kiss ♡

JUNMIN ☆

Junmin felt a little chubby when he was growing up so he understood how you felt

After researching, he found that setting small goals really helps your mental being

So he decided to do just that

This week, you should at least eat a apple everyday

Next week, you would go for a 30 minute walk

Does everything with you so you dont have to feel alone ♡

SUMIN ☆

He'd be all ears

Hes kinda like minjae too; his baby?? Feeling fat???

But would still let you rant everything out without him interrupting

Wipes away your tears if you start crying

And when you're done, he would go on a rant about how beautiful you are, and even though you dont feel this way right now, you will feel this way in the future ♡

JINSIK  ☆

As soon as you open up to him, hes gone

Then you hear a big crash

Throws away (stomps and slams) your bathroom scale

Along with anything else that triggers you

Then would go on a long rant about how you shouldnt compare yourself to others ♡

HYUNWOO ☆

You told him when you thought he was sleeping because it would be too hard telling him when hes awake

Immediately sits up when you fall asleep, his heart breaking as he rubs your back

And then bolts out of the bed

Spends the next 30 minutes placing sticky notes in random places for you to find, using affirmations like "youre so pretty" or "you are worth it"

And when you see it the next morning you almost break down, hyunwoo restating the note over and over ♡

JUNGHOON ☆

Junghoon feels like hes not good at using his words and would accidentally offend you

So he creates a playlist

You know those body worship songs like i love my body by hwasa or any meghan trainor song?

Hes got them all in one playlist for you to listen too

And he even sings along ♡

SEEUN ☆

Seeun knew you werent one for exercising, so why not some yunmy healthy food to eat?

He knows hes not the best at cooking but he will try

And if not he'd recruit another member

Wont force you to eat all the vegetables but once he does figure out what healthy foods you like to eat. Its over

For dessert, he would hand feed you some fresh fruits ♡

YUJUN ☆

"What, no you arent." Would be yujuns first words but he knows words dont matter actions do

So with lots of kisses, he would drag you to the bathroom

Makes up a self care plan for you to do everyday, teaching you to love your body just like how he loves you

Speaking of love, he looks at you with so much love in his eyes, you feel like melting

And if you let him, he would kiss every part of your body, and pressing extra ones in the places you feel insecure ♡

HUNTER ☆

We all know how hunter journals his emotions just when hes about to go to bed

And so he requests that you do the same

Writing down your feelings makes you feel more connected to yourself, and pinpoints how you started feeling this way

And just like yujun, if you let him, he would kiss all the places where you feel insecure

And cuddles you, whispering in your ear that you are so beautiful and you should not think of yourself that way. And even if you do, hunter would do everything in his power to change your mind ♡

YECHAN ☆

Yechan thought you were joking at first

But his smile immediately drops when he finds out that you werent

Yechan would spend the next few days talking about self acceptance. Making you talk out your feelings and acknowledge your abilities

Would give examples on how this relates to him too, like when he was younger, he thought his rap was terrible

But would reassure you that what youre feeling will not last forever, and that you will see some happier days ♡

[lemmetreatya]

photographer!jotaro whos used to taking photos of industry professionals, actors, singers, nepo babies — the lot! it’s almost second nature to him.

there’s never a doubt of how to do his work because the lens photographer!jotaro sees people through is contrary to how his eyes do. photographer!jotaro finds everyone fickle; it’s the camera he has to give credit due when given accolade.

but when you, his personal muse, tells him that maybe he should try being on the other end of the lens in order to broaden his view of photography, he gets defensive, almost grumpy about the suggestion.

“dont piss me off.” he mumbles at the computer screen, albeit with no bite to it.

you playfully huff because you know photographer!jotaro well enough by now to know he wasnt angry at you. with a hand that aimlessly plays with the hairs on his neck, you pout down at him as he does his work.

“but i’m being for reeeeal. you gotta try it so that you have something over other photographers. have the experience of being a subject.”

photographer!jotaro moves his chair back so that he can retrieve a file from underneath his desk. an implicit notion for you to unhand him and dead the topic.

“i already have something over them and that’s my skill. i dont need to be on the other end to get more of it.”

rolling your eyes, you move away from the man. if it was one thing that frizzled you about photographer!jotaro was his lack of inquisitive spirit.

“jotaro, why should i let myself be your muse if you cant even be one for yourself? honestly, if you dont wanna take pictures for you at least do it for me.”

there’s a whine in your voice but photographer!jotaro knows you’re being serious. hes had a taste of your wrath before and he wasn’t a fan of it. still, photographer!jotaro was a man of peace before he was a man of resilience. maybe if this was back when he was much younger, he would have shrugged you off and told you to get on with your day. but photographer!jotaro’s tasted a bit of life and you’re one of the only sweet things in it. he’d be an idiot to throw it away because of pride.

reluctantly, photographer!jotaro lets you pick a location for the shoot but he’s already regretting giving you the reigns on such a delicate art process. of course you’re picking your bedroom with low lighting and neon lights.

“jotaro, you’ve got to at least look relax! right now you just look constipated.”

photographer!jotaros struggling to relax because you’re pointing the lens right at him but he tries his best to adhere. however, no matter what way he turns, twists and folds, you’re seemingly unimpressed with his form. leaving the camera on its tripod, you crawl up your bed

“you’ve gotta…” you huff as you move his limbs around for him, quickly removing his signature hat from his head. “seem like you want to be here. act like you’re lazy or something i dunno…”

photographer!jotaro grunts as you alter his look but he doesn’t protest much. hes more enamoured by the sweet smell of your perfume that infiltrates his nose and the warm heat from your body that flushes onto his. automatically his hands have rested on your waist and suddenly photographer!jotaro is very aware hes got you ontop of him in your bed.

you dont even realise photographer!jotaro‘s advances until hes flipped you onto your back and begun leaving damp kisses up the side of your neck.

(un)surprisingly, you have no qualms about the situation yourself as you’re mewling for the man to do more, touch more

photographer!jotaro ends up slow fucking you into the plush of your bed, his strokes long and languid as he never fails to leave you full of him.

“j-jojo…” your arms encase around his large frame and so do your legs. everything about him is all just so big. “the…shoot…”

“dont care.” he grumbles into the blunt of your ear shell, his teeth biting at the soft bone.

your moans call upwards between the four walls of your bedroom, the sounds mesmerising to photographer!jotaro as he hilts his cock deep inside you. he wasnt much of a loud guy, bar for his soppy pants of your name, but his hand never failed to find your as he entwined them both.

photographer!jotaro pulls out with enough time to spare. hes a careful man nowadays — learnt from a lot of prior experiences — but he doesn’t fail to keep your lips connected as he fucks his cock in the fist of his hand and over your stomachs with a solid grunt.

although photographer!jotaro knows that you’re still yet to reach a high and so he brings his fingers down to pet and rub at your clit. he swallows your every mewl and worships you with “well dones” once he feels you clench and pulse over his pads.

no pictures of any kind were taken that day, but photographer!jotaro knows its a memory he’ll forever keep with him.

[marunalu]

Isn't all of the rabid BKDK shippers similar to that one pairing in Bleach where the loud shippers want one pairing and the Editors suggest that the Bleach's author should do it, but he explicitly stated that he wanted this pairing instead because its his story? At best, the official canon ship for Izuku would be Izuchaco or implied of it or no ships at all.

At least Hori agrees with us that the BKDK relationship is abusive and that the two would be treating each other as acquaintances who just happen to grow up together. And the thing is for that BKDK contest, he acknowledges the skills of the artists but the relationship is not romantic at all. So it's really just people being extremely obsessed with the idea that any and all relationships should be romantic instead of platonic. I wonder if he was expecting a badass action scenes between the two working together instead of causal romantic times?

Do you happen to have a citation for the contest so that we can point towards the fact that BKDK is just for fun, not canon?

I remember I saw horis reply somewhere on twitter between 2 or 3 years ago. But I dont have twitter, well X know, anymore. Honestly, I dont quite remember if it was a bkdk fanart contest or just an exhibition. And I think it was only japanese artists. But basically, while he praised all the fanarts and the talents of the artists, he made clear that the way bakugous and izukus relationship is portaied as in these fanworks is not what their relationship is really or ever was like. There were tons of romantic bkdk and fanart of them as children playing happily with each other. He basically confirmed as unbiased as possible that this kind of interpretation of their relationship is completly fanon. Maybe someone who reads this can give us a link though, I tried to find it with google, but google only showed me reddit and quora posts about "why bkdk is canon" and such stupid stuff. 🙄

And yes you are right, the bkdk shippers are VERY similar to the rapid ichiruki shippers back then. Mind you I WAS THERE when the shipping war between ichirukis and ichihimes was at its highest and believe me it was UGLY and for me who never shipped ichigo with either rukia or orihime it kinda destroyed the manga/anime for me back then and its one of the main reasons why I dont like shipping in generell anymore. But despite never shipping it myself I KNEW ichigo would end up with orihime, because kubo made it obvious. The anime cut a lot of canon ichihime moments and included tons of filler ichiruki moments, so its no wonder why so many people believed at first ichiruki was a thing. And to be fair to kubo, he made clear statements back then about ichigos and rukias relationship being pure platonic YEARS BEFORE the manga ended, but the shippers ignored that and played victim afterwards. Hori on the other hand would never make this kind of bold statement, because he is aware of the backlash that would happen. I like hori and I can understand why he wouldnt want to upset people because he was attacked and got death threads in the past already from stupid shippers, but I have to say tite kubo is clearly the braver one of these two. He simply gives a fuck what people think and just does his thing no matter if people like it or not.

The best part was how not that long ago he completly destroyed an hardcore ichiruki shipper on social media who attacked him and insultet ichihime and kubo was just like: "you know what? FUCK YOU! From now on I will make even more ichihime content just to piss you off even more asshole!" Kubo is amazing and a legend!

[nikiluv]

I JUST WANNA SAY THAT I ACCIDENTALY RANTED!!😭 u dont have to post or answer to this but i had to get this off my chest. but bro ppl who in this fandom are literally so soft istg😭its so irritating like. they treat riki like he's a fucking kid when he's 18 turning 19🤦‍♀️so he's a YOUNG MAN!! A MAN A GROWN ONE BTW who just so happens to b young like what's so hard to grasp. Nbs saying you have to treat him like he done experienced every walk of life, but at the end of the day he's still a man and he should b treated accordingly. and it esp pisses me off cuz they have no issue sexualizing the other members specifically the hyung line. and ofc I see other ppl kinda fester this energy into sunoo and jungwon even tho its mainly riki. I vividly rmb someone making a tiktok AS A JOKE!! saying I wanna get aten by sunoo like that when he inhaled a cake and ppl were doing entirely TOO MUCHHH!! and she rightfully called them out saying if it was heeseung or jake nb would care and ppl would agree and its like literallyyy. I've also seen ppl on here say they won't wrote smut for sunoo and riki and its like there's nothing wrong with that at all but why are we leaving out jungwon like hello?? hes very much still apart of that line and sunoo is older than both of them so its like?? if u leave one out leave them all out😭🤦‍♀️i could name so much more examples but this is alr getting so long. but I also had to mention the fact that I VIVIDLY rmb when jungwon turned 18 or 19 or wtv age ppl immediately started pumping out smuts with absolutely no fuss and its like?? WHERE WAS THIS ENERGY AT W NIKI???At least keep the same energy if u do ts like. And its just so much that plays into it too because everyone knows enhypen is catered towards women. I feel like that was their first mistake but on top of that it brought in a lot of young girls who's minds clearly still aren't developed and they feel as tho its like their job?? to protect them when in reality half of the group could literally be their uncle or something. Idk its just so irritating to see ts within a fandom because although I don't claim any kpop fandom anymore. I use to b a engene at some point and a nctzen at some point and LEMME TELL YOUUUU its such a difference!! although ncity has had its moments that was like the only kpop fandom who were actually funny and wouldn't baby none of the members. even if u were underage they would still treat u accordingly without sexualizing u. idk ima stop here cuz this is getting to long but its just so much shit wrong w engenes. like I said earlier u don't have to read or answer to this!! but engenes just annoy the heck outta me🤦‍♀️

it’s fine, what you say was facts tho, like I was an nctzen arnd 2020-2022 ish, and like no nctzen smut blogs said anything about jisung smut being wrote, I mean there where that didn’t agree with it but no hate comments or anything

To me it’s so insane about how people write so much crazy shit about jw but don’t keep the same energy w sunoo and riki

For sunoo it’s probably because he is portrayed at “more feminine” which is just his image, and also because of his sunsun ship etc etc

To me it’s if you wanna give the same energy to Niki, keep that energy towards ALL of Enhypen, don’t just “defend” Niki, talking about writing smut for him just to make yourself better

And the craziest thing is those that are super pressed are always the Enhypen smut blogs ? Like bro ??? Ur writing smut too, what are you on about?? (If it’s fluff blogs then I understand because they do not want to see them, which is valid, so just block, it’s fine, you don’t have to see things you do not want to, no need to send hate )

I really detest that people wanna write the craziest most lewd shit for the rest of Enhypen but when someone writes something for riki even slightly suggestive or fluff smut , they go berserk? Like dude, u go on and on about how we should not sexualise them, then don’t write smut ? Bffr 🤣

[dextixer]

Yknow, at first i thought i would just make a thread telling everyone how manipulative this post about how "I dont hate critique but critique bad" is, to warn people about snakes in the FNDM hiding in the grass.

But then this utter clownshoes decided to invoke Monty, to talk about Montys wishes. To weaponize a dead person as a cudgel for a fucking internet argument.

This is why i hate most of the RWBY FNDM, because they are all sunshine and rainbows, all progressive, all nice people, or at least they portray themselves to be until they take off their fucking masks. And then all of these supposedly nice people reveal themselves to be manipulative ratfucks.

So, lets be very clear. If you invoke Monty in your shitty internet arguments, you are just a morally defunct person, you are lower than fucking trash. He is a deceased man. His corpse is not there for you to parade him like a fucking puppet for your own arguments.

The fact that it follows a fake ass "nice guy" facade is just the icing on the cake.

Despite the claims of the OP, they were not "suggesting that hate discourages people" they were being a snakey fuck by at first saying "Criticism isnt bad" and then outlining literally EVERY single tired anti-criticism buzzword phrase in existence. Everyone fucking knows that most of the time "Im not saying x is bad BUUUUUT" leads to the person revealing that, yeah, they are saying that X is bad. Its the most fucking elementary silencer for any argument in existence.

We have the ol reliables of

>"If you no like, just leave" >Conflating criticism with hate >Implying that people should not criticize passion projects >Implying that RWBY receives unique kind of criticism that no other thing does

Alongside that we also have some weird implications that RWBY is disliked for being "cringe" and of course, more instances of conflating criticism with "hate". If one pays attention they could easily spot a pattern, take a shot of your favourite drink anytime you see the word "hate" or its synonim when the supposed thread is supposed to be about criticsm.

As far as for the second part of the post that comes after my reply.

Criticism does not have to be constructive, its good when it is, but if a person can see something wrong, they can say its wrong without offering a solution. I dont need to be a professional doctor to see a bone sticking out where it shouldnt be etc.

And lets get back to the old sticking point "Oh, but why does RWBY have separate critic communities".

Because the fandom MADE it a fucking necessity! Just like with shows like Game of Thrones and many others! You think critic spaces or subreddits are some kind of never seen before thing before RWBY?!

The only reason RWBY has them is because of the fucking Fandom!

The RWDE tag on tumblr only exists because people were ASKED for criticism to be something that people could avoid, by tagging a post as RWDE anyone using this platform can easily blacklist the tag and NEVER see anything from it! And yet the Fandom instead of doing so CONSTANTLY comes into the tag, and then constantly bitches and whines about how criticism exists!

The critics subreddit exists because most people there were slowly pushed away from the main sub. It didnt START as that, but it became that when the mods of r/RWBY decided that instead of moderating discussions they would rather throw out all the critics because fans would NEVER behave in critical posts and would either mass report them or cause conflict!

Whether someone likes RWBY or not has NOTHING to do with personal morality. Its also extremelly ironic that there are constant "uwu, people say me bad because i like RWBY" claims with nothing to back them up while on places like twitter you can see RWBY twitter accounts say that anyone who dislikes RWBY is just a misogynist or the like.

I would rather take the most toxic critic foaming at the mouth about how RWBY is bad over people like op, ratfuck snakes who pretend to have no problem with criticism while sneaking in the same fucking anti-criticism shit into their threads.

I dont even criticize RWBY that much anymore and i mostly just tell the critics spaces to not even talk to the larger fandom, and its because of dipshits like the OP.

Because the RWBY FNDM is full of these nice presenting, nice writing manipulative jackasses who are just smiles and rainbows while saying the same tired bullshit as always. Just a reminder, just because someone is "polite" does not mean they are not full of shit.

[genderkoolaid]

Ngl i dont really get 'feminist' mens rights activism. Are men hurt by the patriarchy? Yeah... but they benefit from it too, and more than they hurt. Straight people are hurt by homophobia and transmisogyny too, but no one is out here doing 'pro lgbtq rights straight activism'.

So, first of all, while I personally don't know of any queer liberation-based cishet activists, there are plenty of cishet activsts for queer liberation. And honestly, if some cishet people wanted to use queer theory and queer activism as a lens to examine cishet issues in solidarity with queer liberation, then good for them! That sounds like it could be really cool and really helpful for dismantling homophobia, transphobia, gncphobia in cishet relationships/spaces. I think that could be really beneficial for a lot of people, especially cishets who still don't fit perfectly in patriarchal gender roles.

Second of all, and to actually answer your question, I don't feel there's a minimum amount of suffering needed before someone deserves to be helped. I don't see the point in acknowledging that men are harmed by the patriarchy if we aren't going to try to address those harms. Why are these issues used as a rhetorical argument but then actually critically examining them is seen as bad? If we agree that the patriarchy is harmful to men, and that men would, as a group, benefit from it's destruction, why shouldn't we encourage men to seek liberate in solidarity with other genders?It feels to me that at least one reason this is viewed negatively is because it's not punishment-based. It doesn't suggest that men need to suffer or that their suffering is deserved or "their own fault", and it's focused on redemption and connection. If we agree that men are harmed by the patriarchy, why shouldn't men want liberation from that? Do you think that the patriarchy should be dismantled without ever critically examining how men are harmed by it? That kind of thing is what brings more men into gender activism and makes feminism stronger. It helps further collective healing from the damage patriarchal gender roles have done. And on top of all this, I'm not sure we can make any sort of assessment of how much men benefit from the patriarchy vs how much they are harmed, especially since the benefits can vary from situation to situation and person to person. Trans men are men who benefit little to none from the patriarchy, and I can't imagine many of us would appreciate being told that we are helped more than we are hurt by it. There are also many people who were AMAB who live mostly as men, regardless of their actual gender, who are severely hurt by the patriarchy. Some die because of it (through various things, not only issues caused by emotional repression but things like gaybashing, bullying, child abuse, etc.). And personally, I don't feel I can say that none of this deserves active concern and treatment until women's issues are resolved, morally- and I think it's unlikely that women's issues can be perfectly treated in a way completely detached from men's issues. The idea that we can only fight for one struggle at a time is a fallacy. We don't have to "choose" between men's issues or women's. I literally cannot- both affect me personally, and I cannot live in peace without fighting both fights. Even if it weren't personal, I don't want any group of people to be suffering if it can be helped.

Plus, men's issues intersect in the same way misogyny does. I got into men's liberation through transmasc-specific activism, because I realized that so many issues trans men faced intersected with other groups because of a shared antimasculism problem. In the same way that a lot of other issues intertwine with misogyny, and that can't be ignored when studying non-gendered forms of oppression, men's gendered experiences with bigotry matter too. Gender roles are sticky, they get everywhere. It's foolish, in my opinion, to think that women's gender roles intersect with everything (true) but that men's gender is a non-entity that has no bearing on the other issues they experience. When Black men (as well as butches and studs) are viewed as hyper-aggressive, hyper-sexual, hyper-masculine, that's the intersection of patriarchal male gender roles (men are aggressive and sexually active) with anti-Black racism. The idea of "savage" men being cartoonishly violent and sexually aggressive (making them a threat to White women) is pretty common in various forms of racism, as gender roles are played up to demonize or mock another group. Disabled women are often painted as failures if they are unable to have children, or cook & clean, because of misogyny. Disabled men are often painted as failures if they cannot do manual labor, or impregnate someone, because of antimasculism. I don't think we can analyze other forms of oppression without looking at how gender plays into it, and we can't do that only focused on women & especially cis women. We need the trans perspective, and we need the male perspective. And "male perspective" does not mean "patriarchal perspective".

I hope this was a good explanation of why I feel men's liberation and studying of antimasculism is important.

[alicentsgf]

What do you like in rhaenicent? What attracts you to them as a couple, and what attracts them to each other in your opinion?

i was so tempted to just respond with 'im a lesbian' but imma bite. prepare yourselves.

the basic cornerstone of it is i love women and i really really love tragedy, so this pairing is Perfection. on the most basic level, episode 1 rhaenicent was just cute like anyone who denies that just hates joy i guess. i was at least a little invested from scene 1.

you've got these two girls who have such different temperaments but then theres this undeniable element of sensual intimacy and chemistry. to me it seemed obvious even without the comments from the cast and crew that alicent and rhaenyra were in love with each other (in some way) as girls. they start off so comfortable with each other, reaching out for each other at every opportunity. rhaenyra even admits, however flippantly, to wanting alicent (and freedom) to the detriment of everything and everyone else. she would leave it all behind except alicent. but this means the dream dissipates with alicents disproval. rhaenyra is All desire, whereas, for better or worse, alicent tempers that because she is All duty and shes been raised to perform it without question (initially for rhaenyra as her companion, then later for her king/husband and their children). the biggest themes in the story are brought forth by rhaenicent's dynamic and by ways in which they act as foils for each other: loss, betrayal, duty vs desire, generational curses, motherhood, the madonna/whore dichotomy and its impotence, and the inevitability of a tragic ending.

they loved each other so deeply because growing up they were each others everything. i honestly think alicent only ever experienced unconditional love with rhaenyra, which is why she clings to the memory of it so desperately, (whereas rhaenyra had aemma perhaps?). alicent and rhaenyra were never without each other in their formative years, and they probably thought they never would be. in some ways they were torn out of each others lives with the same amount of violence and resulting mutilation as aemond losing his eye. they had molded themselves into each others empty spaces, making up for what the other lacked. they're incomplete without each other and deep down they both know that, and its why even after everything, with all the reasons they shouldn't care about each other anymore, they still find themselves desperate for reconcilation. and alicent still wont see rhaenyra dead, even when shes a possibly lethal threat to alicent's family. otto sees the truth of it, forcing alicent to acknowledge it too - even at the peak of their estrangement a world without rhaenyra is a world alicent cant make sense of.

and heres the really delicious part: they're going to destroy each other. its inevitable and it always was, because the world they live in would never have let them do anything else. its the curse of the targaryens meets the curse of westerosi womanhood. idk maybe at this point some people might wonder 'well then why bother having them love each other at all, if it ends with them alone and afraid and hating each other?', but isnt that the point of tragedy? love matters even if it sours. it matters even if it cant save anyone. theres catharsis in acknowledging the cost of human frailty and not doing anything to suggest things should or could have happened differently, but just encouraging us, very simply, to indulge our own ugly, stupid humanity.

the truth is the moment their relationship first truly gripped me was actually episode 6. i loved young alicent and rhaenyra but it was seeing their older versions so at odds with one another in contrast to their past that captured my interest. which is why i feel 'shipping' is just... not the right term for what where my brain is at with them. i feel it implies i want things for them as a pairing that i dont: i dont want them together, i dont want them to be less resentful, or to reconcile, and for all the jokes i dont even want them to be physically intimate. i want them to hate each other and i want them to hate how much they still care, i want it eating them alive, i want them unable to deny it because its the love, grief, and betrayal thats at the root of their resentment.

for me it seems like the reason grrm and the development team okayed this change is because whilst a 'history' book like fire and blood doesnt need an element such as this, the change in format to an intimate portrayal made it almost necessary. rhaenyra and alicents dynamic anchors the plot whilst also critiquing the nature of the shows own source material for its inaccuraces and misogyny. as a result the story of the dance becomes not just a story of targaryen entitlement and the resulting retribution, which i would have been a fan of anyway, but the tragic love story of two women who fell victim not just to the unforgiving nature of the world they were born into, but to their own human frailties. and im honestly just basking in it because this is so much more than i could have hoped for.

so i guess my point is that rhaenicent are barely even a 'couple' to me lmao, im studying them like a live specimen under a microscope and im not afraid to prod them with sharp implements.

[arabian-batboy]

Okay genuine question then. Should i not vote.

Do i sit back and let the genocidal maniac who is set on ruining everything EVERYWHERE win. Or do i try and sway it to the genocidal maniac who is at least advocating for my ability to afford food.

Thats the decision im faced with here. If you have any suggestions i am more than open to them! we just. dont have many options.

I dont disagree with you, theyre both horrible. But one of them will win either way. This is a "lesser of two evils" situation, and you either watch everything burn or try to sway it to the person who has at least ONE thing you support. there's unfortunately no magical third option that fixes everything. I'm open to suggestions, believe me, we are genuinely looking for them.

How many times do we need to have this conversation before you people realize that the "lesser of two evils" is just a sham, both parties are equally evil and have equal amount of blood on their hands? They just brainwashed you idiots into believing you will actually be able to "afford food" under one of them when both of them will gladly have you starve to death as long as they can keep dropping bombs over innocent civilians half-way across the world because they know most of you will continue being divided into voting one of them without ever considering the possibility of voting for a 3rd party that will not prioritize imperialism in the global south over their hungry citizens.

Which is why you're asking if not wanting to vote for democrats means you shouldn't bother going to the voting booth at all, its 2024 and your brain still can't comprehends that you have the right to vote for a 3rd party and that's exactly why your 2 parties system (which in reality is actually just a one party system) managed to last so long.

And I'm not an idiot, I know how hard it is for a 3rd party to win elections and that it's not something that can happen over-night, but there's a start for everything and unless you're willing to continuously invest in a 3rd party for a long period of time so that they can gradually grow in numbers then nothing will change.

Do I believe a 3rd party might win this elections or even the next elections? Probably not, but it doesn't change the fact that the green party (as well as the Libertarian party) is more popular than ever now and that US's unconditional support for history most-documented genocide in Gaza as well as how AIPAC gleefully publicly announce how literally all the candidates they finance have won their elections has made more people wake the fuck up and realize realize how broken and corrupted their system is and how voting 3rd party is the only way to fix it and who knows? Maybe voting 3rd party, even if it will not results in them winning, might influence the other 2 parties to start adopting similar policies to the green party, not because they actually care about innocent people dying, but in hopes they can lure 3rd party voters into coming back to vote for them.

So until that day comes, I will continue clowning people who support either republicans or democrats because that's the only way to grow numbers for a 3rd party and if you still don't believe me and genuinely still believe that the US's government literally can NOT be run by non-war criminals? Then the US simply shouldn't exist and I pray another superpower will come and destroy it in the future, after all why should the lives of American citizens (who don't want to put any efforts into stopping their government from using their tax money to commit more war-crimes and state-sponsored terrorism) be worth more than non-Americans?

Again, assuming what you think about the 2 parties system being unchangeable is true, which I personally don't believe.