#down bad for kang seulgi

[seullovesme]

HOW CAN SHE JUST POST THIS ON HER STORY WHEN IM TRYING TO SURVIVE AT SCHOOL 😭😩😩😩😩😮‍💨😮‍💨

my brother dmed me "did u see seulgis story, she cant just be doin this" and i instantly opened insta to see THIS. straight up started giggling and kicking my feet in class i will literally write the dirtiest smut based of this photo

[fanfiction4sooya]

Alpha!Seulgi helping O!Reader through her first heat by fulfilling all her needs

Sorry for taking so long, but here it is!! Thanks for the request, honey bun!! 💖💖

tw: breeding, alpha seulgi, vaginal sex, mating press, professor x student, +18 ofc, swearing, etc.

You were doing your normal routine in your university's library when your first felt that unfamiliar heat wave. You did't really thought anything of it, so you kept reading the content of the book you had in front of you, taking a deep breath. Soon you felt it again, but this time stronger and with a sting between your legs. Your eyes widened, looking around to make sure no one was near as realization started to hit.

It couldn't be, right?? You were slightly older than the other omegas, your first heat wouldn't hit you out of nowhere in the middle of a public place full of alphas... right?

"Oh, no... no, no" You kept saying under your breath, collecting your items and rushing out the door to the parking lot. Your legs were shaky by the second, some sort of pain spreading on your lower region. "Oh my god" Crying out, you fell on your knees clutching your lower abdomen. You were just by your car, why couldn't that agonizing feeling wait?

"Are you okay?" You heard a familiar voice, thank goodness.

The sweet and gentle alpha Professor Kang Seulgi, you favorite ever. She kneeled beside you, one steady hand on your back so you would recognize her.

"Professor... help" You clutched to her button up, immediately nuzzling to her neck. She tried to push you a little, but as soon as she felt how strong your scent was, she picked up on it. Her pupils dilated, staring down at you. "I need to at least get home, please" You whined and the alpha took a deep, steady breath.

"You can't drive like this" She got the car keys out of your hand, picking you up bridal style as if your weight was nothing to her. "Careful, don't hit your head" She firmly told you when she sat you on the passenger seat, quickly running to the driver's side.

"You know what I'm doing is against the rules, right?" She started scolding you after you told her your address. "The university requires for you to know when you are in heat so things like this don't happen" She eyed you up and down, locking her jaw. Her cock getting hard, even though she really tried to hold it so it wouldn't happen.

"I'm sorry..." You mumbled, feeling yourself getting wet and dizzy. "It's my first heat" You swallowed thickly. "I had no idea it would happen, I'm so sorry" You squeezed your thighs together, trying to get rid of that uneasy feeling. You felt her shift on her seat, squeezing the steering wheel. "It hurts so bad, professor..." You moaned, not completely aware of what you were feeling.

"Oh, my god..." You could feel her scent getting stronger. Petrichor. That amazing smell that lingers after a rainy day. She was trying to calm you down, that was the meaning behind the scent. Protective, calming and very familiar. Matching the face and the scent, you could totally see why nature chose that or her. "We are almost there" She gave you a pet to the head and you basically melted to her touch, leaning into it. "I'm taking you home, you call someone when we get there ok?" She told you and you felt a sting between your legs, pouting.

"No" You said before your mind could fully register. "You, please" she looked at your for a few moments, her breath steady and very deep. She considered that ideia over and over, sighing in a defeated way.

She parked the car in front of your apartment, opening the door for you rather quickly. It was dark, so there weren't many people in the street.

"Please alpha, don't let me feel this anymore" You were horny, desperate, in pain. She could feel how scared you were too.

"Don't worry, darling" She helped you walk to your front door, taking your keys and opening it. "I'll be right here" She said, her eyes full of confidence and empathy, as if she knew exactly what you were going through.

You didn't expect her to accept so that was a bit shocking, but you were so horny you couldn't even think. Time went slow when she circled your waist pulling you to embrace her body with your legs, kissing your neck, then your lips.

She went (as if she knew your apartment with the palm of her hand) straight to your bedroom, laying you against the soft mattress, her mouth hot against your skin. It felt out of this world, almost as if they were made for each other. You moaned softly when she bit your lower lip, you could feel her hard cock between your bodies brushing against your wet cunt.

"I need you inside me" Your eyes glimmered with tears, your whole body felt about to combust.

"I know baby, we are getting there" She whispered to you, kissing your neck and taking your clothes off piece by piece. "Absolutely beautiful" She traced your rib cage with one of her fingers. "I always wanted to fuck you, but knowing you'll spend your first heat with me?" She laughed, her eyes dark with desire. "Priceless" She kissed your jaw and you squirmed.

That was new. You never really thought she wanted you in that way, the same way you wanted her; but since the whole university fell to her feet, you didn't really thought you'd ever have a chance. Given the circumstances you were very, very wrong.

"Alpha please, please" You got on your knees in front of her on the bed, the bulge very visible inside her trousers. You were wild, pulling her belt and pants down almost ripping them, tears on your eyes.

She growled lowly and you immediately fell back into submission, lowering your eyes and whining; that was completely new, as if she commanded you and you had no other option than obey.

On your knees, you saw when she spread your legs just enough to see wetness dripping from your hole to the sheets, her gripping your jaw to make you face her. She was smiling down at you, her touch warm and secure. She pulled her cock from her boxers, scenting you so much you felt your cunt pulse with need. Alluring, drawing you to her in a way you never felt before.

You were just hers to toy with at that very moment.

You didn't realize you were shaking, that mix of pain and pleasure making your head spin.

Seulgi pushed your back to touch the bed, getting on top of you and between your legs. Her eyes didn't left yours as she rubbed the tip of her cock on your slit, hitting your clit with it. You mewled, closing your eyes and scratching her back under the unbuttoned blouse.

"It hurts, please" You pleaded again, she was about to make you go crazy from all that teasing.

"Always so polite" She licked your lips and you trembled, whimpering. "That's why you are my favorite student" She didn't wait for anything else, shoving her cock inside you and stretching you even more by doing so. Her eyes trained on your face as she set the hardest pace ever, fucking you just right.

Your mind was fuzzy, thinking only of carrying her puppies, of being bred over and over again. She growled louder, your pussy clenching on her cock and almost trapping her there. That felt so different from sex. Much more messy and fuzzy, literally so natural.

"Yes, professor please" You cried out and something inside her snapped, her hands holding both your wrists above your head and the other squeezing your waist to hold you in place so she can fuck you better.

She suddenly turned you around, your body flat on the bed and she relentlessly hitting your cervix with her cock and moaning on your ear, licking your neck and back. Her body felt heavy and safe and your mind kept wandering again and again to puppies, as if you were trained exactly for that.

"Your puppies, I- I need them" You couldn't hold it in anymore, loudly moaning for her, tears threatening to fall from your eyes. It felt dizzy, as if you were hungry for a very long time.

She got off your body, pulling you into doggy style, shoving her cock in you once again, hissing when your wet pussy made contact with her dick. Grabbing the sheets you could only hide your face there, your body perfectly arched as you finally started to release your pheromones, scenting the whole apartment and more. It smelled like a wet garden: soft and cozy, perfect for Seulgi's petrichor.

Your body felt like a feather, at the same time it felt like it was being ripped apart. That pain was starting to feel heavy, unbearable; only her cock could satiate that urge, that primal instinct. You started to follow her thrusts, your back shots hard and fast, swallowing her 9 inch cock with ease.

Drooling, shaking, babbling and probably a lot of other things, your body started violently shaking and so did hers. She was growling, animalistic and completely wild when she tossed you around to press your knees against your chest.

"I'm gonna breed you so hard, fuck" She shoved her cock back inside you and you started fully sobbing, clawing at her arms and covered thighs.

"Oh my fucking god please, cum inside me, please give me your pups" You were screaming and shaking and she was completely out of her mind. Your scent felt too fucking good, that mating press position giving her access to your cunt in a way she never thought she would actually have.

She kissed you, still fucking and pressing your knees on your chest, marking your legs with her nails. You felt the urge to mark her. Being new at this you just followed your instincts, your fangs coming out to bite her neck and she smiled, covering your mouth with her big hand.

"No marking" She growled, her knot growing and making it hard to move her hips. "Good pussy, so fucking good" She was out of her mind, her eyes closed as yours did the same, moaning against her palm. "You are mine, mine"

She felt your cum on her dick and that was the last straw for her as ropes and ropes of her thick semen covered the insides of your cunt, her cock pulsing hard. You held her hips there with every ounce of strength left in your body, both your scents mixing up as her knot finally popped inside, making your cries become relieved and pained at the same time.

It hurt, definitely.

Your cries became more and more erratic because you were not really understanding your feelings, but soon you were engulfed in her scent, her calm and gentle petrichor scent; she lowered your legs on both of her sides, circling your waist with her arms and switching positions so you would lay on her chest as you were still connected and would be for some time.

Soon your cries became whimpers and sniffles, very quiet as you felt her ever so calming presence.

"It hurts..." You managed to say, hiding your face on the crook of her neck.

"I know, sweetie" She cooed, caressing your back. "I am sorry you have to go through that, but that's just the first time" She made you look at her, her alpha side going ballistic by hearing your whimpers. "It gets better with time" She kissed the tip of your nose and you lightly moaned, clenching. God, you were going insane again.

"You swear and promise?" She looked at you with amusement, her professor side almost slipping in to correct that phrase but she found you so adorable at that moment that she didn't had the heart to do it.

"I swear and promise, sweetheart" She smiled at you, her eyes were so pretty up close.

You hummed, filling your lungs with air. Her very scented air, releasing your own without you even knowing.

You were feeling aroused again, your body feeling hot and that dizzying feeling hitting you like a bullet.

"Professor Kang..." You breathed out, feeling that her knot had shrunken and her cock was already hard.

"I know, omega" Her voice sounded scarier, very alpha-like. "I'm here to take care of your needs..." Was the last thing you remembers her saying before her cock slammed into you once again.

[ad0rechuu]

★ MILKY WAY. ━━ (025) kang pompompurin

WORD COUNT. 1384

WARNINGS. hate comments and hints at anxiety

credits to @ari-shipping-stuff for being my beta reader / writer <33

YOU JUST DECIDED THAT THIS WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED ROCK PAPER SCISSORS WITH YOUR MEMBERS.

You scan your surroundings carefully, eyes moving from the paper in your hand to the sign plastered on the building in front of you. It’s exactly the same as the one that Seulgi had shown you before you left.

‘Hanuelsan.’

You adjust your headphones and step inside without much thought, repeating the words you had to say to the cashier in your head.

As you joined the short queue, you finally look around. It isn't busy inside the small cafe as it's close to dinner time. The day was coming to an end for most. But for people like you, it had only just begun. You were kind of grateful that you had to wear a mask and disguise in public; the dark circles underneath your eyes aren't the most appealing to your fans.

Before you know it, it's your turn in line. You lower the volume on your headphones and make eye contact with a girl. She regards you politely, greeting you with a pretty smile.

“Hello, I’m here to pick up an order for.. Kang Pompompurin—?!” You pause abruptly and try to regain your composure. But your voice only gets quieter the more you spoke as the embarrassment settles in. “..Yes. I’m here to pick up an order placed by, uhm.. Kang Pompompurin.”

Out of all the names to choose, she just had to use the one of her favorite Sanrio character.

If the cashier feels your embarrassment, she does a good job at hiding it. She nods and checks something on the cash register in front of her.

“Your order will be ready shortly. Please feel free to take a seat while you wait.”

You thank her and walk to a seat in front of the window, closest to the register. It's peaceful, a feeling you aren’t really used to.

Opening your phone you look trough social media. Specifically, the comments underneath your and Fatou’s new cover.

There are so many encouraging ones from people that support you and STAR, but the ones that stand out to you the most are the rude ones— the comments that tell you how bad you are at everything and that you should just quit or worse.

What if they are right? What if you really make your members and everyone else you associate with look bad? What if you are really that horrible to hear and look at? What if all those shooting stars only like you out of pity? What if—

“Order for Kang Pompompurin?” An employee calls out.

The sound of his voice interrupts the black hole your own thoughts dragged you into. You quickly stand up and make your way to the counter.

You nod along as he reads up your order, before noting the soft, mischievous sound of it with a small smile.

As he asks if the order is correct, you finally make eye contact. The confirmation in the back of your throat dies when you find yourself greeted by a familiar face.

The sharp eyes, well-shaped nose, and wide shoulders make him look like some sort of hidden Greek— well, Korean god. But the soft dimple and freckles lining his neck make him look so damn adorable. It’s a sight you’ve only ever seen in pictures before.

“San?”

His eyes widen at his name being called. You remove your headphones and pull the hood of your jacket down, as well as your mask.

Shock doesn’t leave his features but a childlike excitement joins when he gets a good look at your face. But it quickly gets replaced by concern as he reaches for your wrist over the counter, eyes darting around frantically. He pulls you closer and uses both of his hands to pull your hood back over your head. His movements are delicate, like you’re the most fragile thing on this earth.

A slightly red hue covers his cheeks when he realizes what he just did. He clears his throat and hands you your bag.

“S-So you were Kang Pompompurin. I was wondering why it sounded so familiar.”

You let out an angelic laugh that has the boy in front of you in a trance. “Seulgi ordered it. But I’m so surprised to see you here, dude.”

“Yeah, me too. I work here, my parents own this place.” He gestures to the whole cafe, which made you look around with much interest. He then points towards the pretty cashier from earlier, now busy in conversation with one of the other customers. “And that’s my sister.”

Your gaze finds its way back to San, your mouth slightly agape. “That’s so cool! I had no idea.”

He brings a hand to his nape, seemingly deep in thought. “You were actually my last customer for today. I-If you have time, would you consider having some coffee or boba or whatever you like with me maybe?

“It’s on the house of course!” He adds.

“You don’t have to do that, but yeah I’d love to.”

AFTER NOTIFYING YOUR members that you would be late, you two sit down at your previous spot in front of the window.

Time with San goes fast. He's exactly like you expected. Maybe a little shy but still really fun to talk to. It actually makes you sad that you hadn’t met him earlier in your life.

“And I loved your cover with Fatou, did you guys film it yourself?” He asks.

You nod. It feels weird having his full attention on you. You were used to being the most controversial member and people are usually more interested in what your members were up to rather than your words. Not that you mind, but it doesn't feel that way with San. He asks you questions and listens to your answers in rapt attention.

It feels… nice?

“Yeah, we did. You would be surprised how many times I embarrassed myself in public for my parts.” You reply, earning a laugh from him as you sip your drink of choice (which he refused to let you pay for).

You absentmindedly look at the big clock hanging on one of the walls. Your eyes widen as you catch a glimpse of the time. You're nearly late for evening practice.

San notices your bittersweet expression when you faced him, making his heart speed up a bit.

“I think I should go, I’m late for practice and the managers will be on my ass if they find out that I’m out alone when it’s nearly dark.”

The way he looks up at you as you stood made your heart hurt. The boy looks something like a kicked puppy (or kitty rather). Nonetheless, he nods and stands along with you.

“Would you like me to walk you back?”

“What way are you going?”

He points to the opposite direction of the way back to the company in response.

“No, thank you. I have to go the opposite way.”

You chuckle as he pouts at you. This guy truly doesn't know how much just talking to him made your day.

You take a step closer to the boy. “Can I give you a hug before I leave?” You ask, not wanting him to be uncomfortable.

San nearly chokes on air, but as nods frantically, like the moment was going to fade if he doesn't answer quick enough.

“Y-yes! Yeah, sure.” He awkwardly laughs.

You waste no time and move to embrace him. All the while, he timidly put his arms above your waist with a weak grip. You feel the warmth of his cheeks with the proximity in which you two stand by each other.

It lasts maybe less than 10 seconds, but San could barely contain his happiness, even as you two separated.

You grab your bag, leaving the flustered boy standing there. When you reach the door, you turn around one more time to wave and flash a hidden smile at him.

“It was really nice to have finally met you, San! You’re indeed very cute.”

As the chilly air outside reaches you once more, you make sure to remember the name of this cafe.

Because you have a feeling that this wouldn't be the last time you’d visit HanuelSan.

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NOTES. first written chapter i hope u enjoy it and please comment what u thought because i feel really self conscious about this one !! btw if u don’t get the get the kang pompompurin thing is a nod to seulgis priv twt username

TAGLIST. @bunnystrm @seongwin @aestheticsluut @meginthebuilding27 @gaebestie @stopeatread @pr1ncessm1ng1 @persphonesorchid @se0nghwaswife @seonghwasslytherin @leeknowsnothing @alixnsuperstxr @bluehwale-main @miriamxsworld @tocupid @lvsmeph @sunoo-bby @jcngh0-hq @dudufodd @nikisbf @mrowwww @end0rchans @qtdenks @mintgki @dear-dreamie @leo-seonghwa @legohwas @evilsailorsenshi @seonghwaddict @choichaeyiul @iw4milf @yunstarz @cvberidiot

[slowlydifferentbluebird]

ABS DAY

Is it maybe today "Abs day"? No, because Seulgi and Heejin decided that it Is👹

Kang Seulgi, you are insane! She's so fit and hot that's not funny, I'm down so bad 🫠

And Heejin...what a fucking flex! I need to spend my day massaging her abs because yes 🫡

Zazá

[myouicieloz]

Hi! I just found your blog and I’m looking forward to your works. Could I request a Seulgi angst fic; where you and Seulgi have been in a happy, loving, fulfilling, committed relationship for the past 3 years, but one day when she came back from practice with the girls you two got into a heated argument about how she’s always canceling dates with you because work related things come up that she “can’t miss” and she ends up bringing up something that you had confided in Her about awhile ago and uses it against you; to which she immediately regrets and tries to take back and can you take it from there? Thank you! I look forward to it:)

Missing you

Kang Seulgi x reader

Warnings: toxic!relationship, angst (dw it’s all good now)

Word count: 3.7k

Notes: hi!! sorry for taking long <3. I kind of struggled to think of a motive of them arguing bc it kept getting too dark (as in they wouldn’t be able to get past this lol) and I kinda wanted a happy ending. I hope this is to your liking!! Kisses mwah mwah.

Your gaze flew to the clock for the 30th time in a spam of five minutes, making you sigh in defeat. Seulgi had promised you she’d meet you at your favorite restaurant for dinner, as a way to make up to you for being so busy over the past weeks. Yet there you were, sitting alone with a glass of bitter wine for over two whole hours before you finally gave up and went home, realizing she wouldn’t come. Again.

Babe <3

Hey baby, rehearsals are going up until late since we still have so much to work on

I won’t make it to dinner. Sorry.

Next week, though? I’ll make it up to you. I promise.

I love you

You got into your apartment just as her message lit up your phone. You threw it over the sofa, preparing yourself a long bath to try to relax. You took a deep breath before entering the warm water, the bubbles and the silence easing your tensed muscles. You tried not to think about your girlfriend or your relationship, knowing it’d only make you even more upset, but your thoughts didn’t seem to let you rest.

You and Seulgi loved each other, you knew that much. You’ve never loved her any less in those three years you’ve been dating, but it pained you to see how much you’ve drifted apart lately. You felt like you were the only one trying to spend time with her, and it wasn’t like you weren’t busy yourself: being an intern in one of Seoul’s top hospitals while studying for residency was tiring and difficult, specially since you’ve always been a bit behind your colleagues, having to push yourself harder than the most to simply be at their level. Still, you always made sure to make some time for Seulgi. Why couldn’t she do the same? Were you not important to her?

Those thoughts made you sigh, your body immersed in the water until it went limp and the water grew cold. Part of you wished you could be somewhat more imposing: demand more from her, confront the woman over your issues, telling her how you felt. You couldn’t, though. You were too weak for that. Which was the reason you dragged yourself to bed, rolling over to set your alarm on your phone before allowing your body to be dragged by sleep.

It’s ok.

Next time, then

Gnight love

Seulgi’s reply came hours later, although you were fast asleep.

Sweet dreams, dearest.

-

To say you were having a bad day was a euphemism. Your preceptor had given you the biggest, shittiest lecture over nothing (so what if you couldn’t get the stupid procedure done at the very first try? He had no right to scream at you to get out of the OR like that, let alone yell at your face for over half an hour about how dumb and unprepared you were, compared to others. Preposterous piece of crap). You nearly fell down the stairs on your way to lunch and, to make it better, your umbrella broke, making you run all the way home after being dropped at the bus stop to try to get less soaked. It didn’t work, and you entered your place with chattering teeth and the feeling of the wind carved deep in your bones. Your body was trembling so much from the cold and the stress, you dropped your keys twice before you managed to open the door, finally sighing in relief.

That relief, however, ended just as you spotted your girlfriend’s silhouette leave your kitchen and enter your living room, smiling as if she hadn’t fucked up hard by leading you on for so long.

“Jesus baby, you’re soaked.” She frowned, giving you a peck on the lips. Your body went rigid at her touch, exhausted from everything, which made Seulgi confused. She was finally able to make some time and come see you, so why weren’t you happy?

You simply murmured something along the lines of hello and so nice to see you, before hurrying to your room to get rid of the wet clothes that clung to your body. You took the hottest shower of your life, trying to wash all the discomfort away, which didn’t work in the slightest.

You loved Seulgi so much it hurt, but the last thing you wanted for the day was to see her. You felt drained, your body ached, and you so desperately wanted to hide under your sheets and cry yourself to sleep. You didn’t want to talk about your day—about anything, specially not to her. It’d demand too much energy to explain what was going on with you over the past few weeks, since you never seemed to properly talk to each other, anymore. You had no energy for that.

And you’ve always sucked at communicating, anyway.

You forced yourself to leave your room, dragging your feet in tiredness, and found Seulgi setting up the table for two. You sat down, still silent, and watched as she put some Tteokbokki for herself.

“I’ve already eaten at the hospital.” You told her, returning her stare with a shrug. Seulgi sighed at your pettiness; perhaps you did get mad at her for canceling on you on the prior week, unlike you’d told her. And the week before that. And-

Ok. She might deserve a bit of your cold shoulder. But you simply had to understand her: she was working so hard with the girls to prepare for their comeback, and there were still many things to be adjusted. Their expected date was approaching, and you’ve always been so comprehensive. Sure, she knew you often masked your feelings or simply dismissed them to try to please others, but she’d asked you about it so many times. If something was making you uncomfortable, you’d sure tell her. Right?

“So,” She grunted, adjusting herself in the chair. “How was your day?”

“It was fine, thanks.”

“Okay.” Seulgi murmured, not touching her food either. She was beginning to get irritated at your distance now. Sure, she knew being a doctor was exhausting and time-consuming, but it wasn’t like she wasn’t having one hell of a week, either. Her fingers twitched under the table, and she no longer stood the awkward silence between you. Rolling her eyes, she added, “Are you just going to be a bitch all night? Because I got here straight from practice, I’m tired as fuck and the last thing I want is for you t—“

“What are you doing here, then, Seulgi?” You interrupted her, feeling the anger rise on yourself too. “Don’t you have rehearsals and recordings to be too busy with? Or should I just be so fucking grateful that my girlfriend decided to grace me with her company? Am I not paying enough attention to your liking?” You usually tried your best to not be rude to others, keeping your sarcastic thoughts to yourself, but your sudden anger flared up and forged a cloud over your mind, making it hard to see clearly through it. “Should we call the others, then? The girls you spend all fucking day with?”

Seulgi rose from the table, her face heating up at your words and suggestions. You played low at that, you both knew it, but now you’ve gotten her way too pissed to think about consequences.

“What the fuck, Yn? What’s gotten into you?” She screams, leaning forward so you two were face to face, “I know it was not ideal at all to skip our dinner.” Multiple ones, you both knew it, but neither pointed it out loud. “But you know I can’t miss work. Please understand.”

Seulgi was just so mad and frustrated. Her times with you were always stress-relieving to her, but lately all you’ve been doing is either argue about minor stuff or simply not talk at all. It was taking a toll on her when it shouldn’t, not with her comeback so close and her stress levels already escalating. It wasn’t good for you either, with your crazy work routines and weekly exams at the hospital. She knew that.

But you couldn’t seem to make it work.

“What’s gotten into me?” You stood up yourself, too, towering over her. Since you were always so sweet and patient, Seulgi would often forget how much taller you were— in fact, it was one of the things she first noticed when you first met; it had gotten her attention instantly. She hated it now, though— how small it made her feel. “What’s gotten into me is that it seems like I don’t even have a fucking girlfriend anymore! You ignore me all the time like I’m just some friend and not someone who matters! I don’t even know what you’re doing half of the time, with God knows who.” You threw your hands in the air, exasperated.

Her expression turned into a scowl, and she rolled her eyes, palms curling into fists to shake the urge of grabbing you by the shoulders and shaking your insecurities away. Seulgi hated when you implied such things. You were the love of her life, and she’d never, never cheat on you, no matter how distant you were. But you were (deeply) insecure, and she knew that. She was also so, so enraged and stressed.

“Jesus, why are you always so fucking dramatic?” she was quick to snap back, defensive. “Acting like I’m going to leave you for the first person I see in the stree…” Seulgi’s words died on her mouth, immediately realizing the power of her words, making both of you gasp. She tried to reach out to you, but you pushed your chair roughly to get away from her.

Your body went rigid, countless memories of you crying to her flagged your mind. You’ve confessed to her many times about how much it bothered you to not have her around as much. You missed her deeply, and even though you trusted her completely, your mind was always playing tricks on you — not only about her, but with everything: how you weren’t enough at University, always behind your friends in grades; not interesting enough to make long last friendships, as you often saw in big groups of friends; not pretty or talented enough for your girlfriend, who was constantly around so many amazing people. That’s just how your mind worked 24/7; constantly wondering.

And now, Seulgi made sure to tell you just how much she hasn't forgotten any of that. Any of the things that made you deeply insecure.

“Get out.” You told her, hugging yourself to hide the urge of running straight to her arms.

Seulgi took a step forward, but it only made you back away twice as much. “Baby, I’m so sorry… listen, I—“

“I said get out!” You screamed this time, the tears you were fighting so hard to contain rolling freely on your face.

All the sensations you were suppressing all week erupted, boiling over your surface as you brushed past the hallway to try to get to your room, to the bathroom, anywhere small were you could be confined and finally let it all go. You were straight up sobbing now, your body hot from moving roughly alongside your heavy breathing. You were so sick of everyhting. Work, your friends, her. Her words hurt, and all you wanted was to disappear. You didn’t quite feel your body as the tears clouded your eyes, and suddenly very light, delicate hands were lifting you up —you now realized you’d simply sunk in the middle of the hallway, hugging your knees as strong as you could— and guiding you to your bedroom. Seulgi helped you to get under the covers as she lay down beside you, careful to not overwhelm you even more. When the older woman saw you’d settled down a bit, she opened her arms, making you cling onto her immediately. You knew you shouldn’t, but it was so comforting, and you loved her so much… You’d allow yourself just that, only for a few moments.

“I-I don’t want to do this anymore.” you muttered against her neck, wetting her shirt with your tears. “I’m so tired, Seulgi. I can’t.”

You felt her tense before you for brief seconds before her soothing touches went on, kissing your forehead ever so gently— almost as if you were made of glass. You certainly felt like it, at the moment. Like you were a glass full of cracks, threatening to shatter.

“Shh, it’s ok.” She cooed, running her hands under your shirt to draw small circles on your bare back, as she knew it soothed you and made you sleep almost instantly. “You’re too tired right now. Sleep, ok? I’ll be here when you wake up, then we’ll talk.”

You didn’t like the idea of talking things out with Seulgi. It would be too tiring, and maybe, just maybe… you were postponing it for so long because you feared what the outcome would be.

You were too afraid to lose her. So you’d rather leave things as they were, no matter how broken and uncomfortable they might be.

Your eyes, however, were already closing on their own, the warmth of her body making it so easy to just give in and rest.

“Okay.” You whispered, hugging her closer. “Tomorrow.”

You fell into a sleep without dreams soon enough.

-

The first thing you noticed when you woke up was how messy the right side of the bed— Seulgi’s side was. You’d missed the wrinkled sheets and how it always looked like a hurricane had passed over your bed whenever she came over, from how much she moved in her sleep. It made you smile to yourself as you got up, bare feet on the ground, while you hesitantly looked around for her, too scared to call her name out loud and find her gone.

It wouldn’t be the first time she broke a promise, after all.

You’d forgotten how much all the little things with her made you happy.

“…Hello?” You asked— secretly relieved, at the sight of your girlfriend kneeling on the ground, little wrinkles adorning her face as she tried hard to shove too many clothes on your washing machine.

She looked up, startled by the sound of your voice, but quickly smiled. “Hi. Did you have a good sleep?” Seulgi sounded genuinely concerned, making you curse yourself silently for worrying her.

Are you ok? She wanted to ask you. Seeing you so distressed had gotten her so guilty and concerned. She hated to see you like this, and it killed her to know she was to blame. I care.

“Yeah, I did, thanks.” You shrugged it off, standing awkwardly at her sides. “You don’t have to do my laundry, you know.”

“Well, someone has to.” Seulgi scoffed, rolling her eyes as she finally managed to close the machine’s door, even if with a bit of an effort.

You opened your mouth, faking being offended while bringing your hands to your heart. “I was going to do it, okay? On…”

“Saturday.” You both finished, together. Saturdays were laundry day for you, though you rarely followed your schedule through. It made you smile, to know she remembered it, and you said nothing, trying to not break the nice moment you were having.

“So, do you want to have lunch? We can go out, if you’d like.” Seulgi suggested, her tone careful as she fidgeted the hem of her big sweatshirt.

You simply stared at her, confused. Lunch? Had you really slept for that long?

“You slept for 13 hours, babe.” She clarified, looking at your confused face, making you quickly check your phone to confim the truth: it was, indeed, nearly lunchtime.

You’ve never been so grateful to be on your day off as much as you did now, or else you would’ve sure missed your pre-rounds at the hospital.

“Oh, ok.” You answered, a bit ashamed for dozing out for so long. “Let’s have lunch, then.” You realized she must’ve been skipping work, too; which was why you added, frowning. “Don’t you have to be in the company? It’s ok if you do. I can wait until nigh—“

“Don’t worry about it.” Your girlfriend clarified, motioning for you to get ready. “Let’s just have lunch, ok?”

You took a deep breath, knowing what she meant; it was urgent for the two of you to sit, talk and solve things. Giving in, you followed her, changing from your pajamas and fixing your hair as she grabbed some of your clothes (that were too big on her, as always. she loved it.) to go out.

“Ok.”

-

You played with your hands, sitting in front of Seulgi at a local restaurant near your house as you waited for your food to come. The cozy atmosphere didn’t do much to easy your discomfort, and you tried hard to not bite your (already deeply bitten) nails off. Seulgi’s eyes were trained on you, making you feel as if hundreds of tiny needles were piercing your skin through her gaze. To your surprise, not once had she checked her phone, unlike all the times you’ve been together over the last few months. Instead, her sole attention was on you, like you dreamed of so many times in those last weeks.

Now, however, her current focus only makes you want to throw up, from the nerves of the situation.

“You haven’t been taking care of yourself.” She expressed, as a matter of fact. It was true, but her accusation made you defensive, eyes snapping to her as you took a deep breath.

You were tired of arguing, and this was one of your favorite places: you’d rather not cause a scene. “Seulgi.”

“Am I lying?” Your piercing gaze was enough for her to roll her eyes, hands up to show you she wasn’t looking for a fight either. “Ok, let’s not go there.” Her tone dropped an octave, “I just worry, ok? You seem to be having it pretty tough.”

She wasn’t pressuring you to say anything before the two of you actually discussed your issues— you knew it as much. It as just hard for you to express yourself, now even more to do so without crying. And you didn’t want to cry in front of her.

“This rotation has been tough, like I already knew it would be.” You told her, refusing to meet Seulgi’s eyes. “It’s ok, though. It’s nearly over, now. Things will get better, then.”

You’d talked about it before your rounds started, Seulgi remembered. Flashes of you, worried, flashed through her mind, with herself assuring you she’d be by your side to help you on each step of your journey.

The memory made her want to throw up, too.

“Look at me, baby.” You heard her say, yet you still refused to meet her eyes. Instead, you felt her hands holding yours, her touch firm. “Yn, look at me.”

You closed your eyes to prepare yourself for whatever was about to come, a few quiet moments amidst the storm of both of your minds. When you opened them, she was ready to welcome you. “I’m sorry, ok? I truly am so, so sorry for those last couple of weeks— hell, these couple of months. I’m such an idiot for leading you on like that and for not treating you like you deserve it. I love you, God, I fucking love you more than anything in this world, Yn, and I can’t stand the thought of losing you.” Her grip went tighter, but you didn’t care. You could only listen to her words. “I promise I’ll do better, to show you how much you matter to me. I’ll be here for you, just like you’ve always been, for me.” She murmured, taking your hands to your lips as she kissed them gently.

Little droplets of tears still threatened to fall from your eyes as your voice faltered, a bulge forming in your throat. You loved Seulgi and needed her like the air you breathed, and sure missed her every second of the day, when you weren’t together. But her distance had hurt you, deeply.

She was crying, too. You realized you’ve actually never seen her cry, in the 3 years you’ve been dating.

“Your distance really hurt.” You managed to voice it to her, between hiccups. “I-I felt like I was doing something wrong all the time.”

“You weren’t. You’d never, baby.” She reassured you, running her hands through your hair to get it out of your wet face. “It was my fault. You’re mine and I’m yours, ok? We’ll start over, and I’ll show you how much you matter to me. I won’t fuck up our relationship anymore.” She looked at you timidly, adding, “And I’m sorry for what I said yesterday, too. It was not my place to use something you confined at a moment like that. I was such a huge bitch.”

“It’s ok.” You muttered, though still hurt.

“No it’s not.” She exclaimed, serious. “It was horrible, and I’m deeply sorry for that. It’s not going to happen again. Ever.”

Instead of answering, you lunged forward, kissing her urgently— fuck the restaurant and etiquette. Seulgi kissed you with equal fervor, savoring your taste. God, she’d missed you so much.

“I love you.” You told her, smiling as you ended the kiss, leaning on the chair. She pouted, but opened a big smile as she saw yours. “And I don’t want us to end. We’ve been through so much. I want to be by your side, with anything that comes.”

“I love you more, Yn. We’ll be together, always. Nothing will fuck us up anymore. No rehearsals, recordings… nothing.” Her hands brushed your lips as she stared at your face, enamored, before adding. “Now tell me about everything I’ve missed. And I mean everything. Don’t save your words.”

You laughed at her, nodding as you quietly started from the beginning: you’ve told her every bit she missed, and Seulgi told everything about herself, too. You ate your food with content, exchanging every single moment with her until hours had passed, and you’ve decided to return home.

And as you walked in the park together, the windy breeze calmed your soul, and with your love by your side, you felt much, much better.

As it should always be.

[yeongwonie]

"have you found what you're looking for, apollo?"

EYE TO EYE (teaser)

when kang seulgi calls you in to discuss your future as hero mercury, it feels like your career is finally headed in the right direction. that is, until you stumble into supervillain and head of the anti-hero resistance, apollo, on your way to the office.

or, you're a hero, sunoo's a villain, and you get bodyswapped.

pairing sunoo x gn!reader

genre enemies to lovers, superhero au, bodyswap

warnings violence, injuries, fire, bad aliases and skill names, very self-discovery centric, wooyoung is younger than sunoo because i felt like it

word count est. 20k?, teaser is 1.1k

featuring wooyoung of ateez, seulgi of red velvet

release late august!

+ please lmk if you want to be tagged when i post the full fic by sending an ask or replying to this post ^^ (perm will be tagged by default)

FROM THE MOMENT YOU WAKE UP, you know it’s going to be a good day. 

Your eyes open the instant before your alarm rings, leaving you just enough time to reach over and click off your phone when the screen lights up, so you don’t have to hear the blaring sound. After you do, you somehow also feel well-rested after your few hours of sleep. Once you sit up and pull your arms above your head to stretch, your neck isn’t stiff, and your shoulders feel relaxed and flexible. When you pad into your living room to watch the morning news, you actually see the little logo on the loading display of your television bounce perfectly off of the corner of the screen. 

Good omen, followed by good omen, followed by good omen. 

And so, even though you have what could be considered a career-defining (and possibly career-ending) meeting scheduled for precisely 10:30 AM with your boss’ boss’ boss’ boss, one of the most frightening women you’ve ever met, you feel hopeful. Excited, even.

The prior evening, Kang Seulgi, or Time Slip, as she was more commonly known, had sent arguably the most anxiety-inducing email you’d ever received. In no more than two hundred characters, she’d told you that you’d be meeting with her personally to discuss your future activity with the company. 

In all honesty, you weren’t sure if that entailed a promotion, or if that was your hint to start looking into a new line of work, but nonetheless, you sent your reply agreeing within five minutes (because one does not waste the Time Slip’s time). 

Maybe your morning would’ve gone differently had you waited for your alarm. Maybe if your shoulders had been stiff, you’d have spent an extra five minutes stretching. Maybe if you hadn’t seen the stupid DVD logo hit the stupid corner of your stupid television, you would’ve actually watched the news broadcast and seen warnings of a small-scale villain tormenting an intersection two blocks from your apartment building.

But, the universe had aligned perfectly, so you leave your house at 9:45 and make it to the aforementioned intersection at 9:50 on the dot.

✷✷✷

KIM SUNOO DOESN’T ENJOY WAKING UP, these days. 

In his first days at the resistance’ building (a room no larger than the average hotel room with a long table placed in the center that they’d all crowded around, desperately drawing up plans for their next big heist and their grand scheme of taking down HYBE), he’d always been excited to go into work. Waking up in the morning felt like reaching just a little further toward this innate, inexplicable light at the end of the tunnel. Now, although they have actual office chairs and conference rooms and enough funding to never have to worry about black mold or leaks in the ceiling ever again, something is missing. 

Now, at the ripe age of 23, his young-adult body is worn from what feels like centuries’ worth of pressure, like the spite that had previously served as his engine has dwindled and left him stranded in the middle of the highway without gasoline. 

He feels he is a product not of growth, but of drastic, haphazard changes crammed together into one form, like those really shitty fruit salads. The line tracing from the person he was seven years ago to who he is now is a squiggle at best. 

Simply put, years of villain work have left him disillusioned.

This is why, although he has a meeting at 10 AM to discuss the future of the resistance and the downfall of HYBE, by 9:47, Sunoo is still sitting at his kitchen counter nursing an iced coffee with copious amounts of cream and sugar. He lifts the glass to his lips, feels the rim, chilled by the ice floating near the surface, then takes a sip. His concoction is sweet on his tongue, almost unbearably so, but the undeniable bitterness of the coffee remains underlying. 

And then Sunoo nearly spills the drink down the front of his shirt. What is he doing?

Almost as though the frankly concerning flavor of his morning coffee has shocked him into regaining his senses, he jolts upright, shoulders stiff. The glass is slammed onto the table (not with too much force, though; working for a nonprofit evil organization doesn’t pay nearly enough for him to buy a new set of dining ware).

In the two seconds it takes Kim Sunoo to stand from the barstool, he decides that yes, he is disillusioned with villainhood, but not enough to throw away everything he’s built over the past half-decade in favor of finishing his shitty cup of iced coffee. He needs to attend this meeting, if not for his present self, then for the person he once was.

In sum: Sunoo feels hope—for the first time in a while—and a newfound sense of determination. The feeling reaches up and grabs him by the collar, dragging him to his coat rack, then his shoes, then out the door towards his future.

✷✷✷

JUNG WOOYOUNG JUST WANTS TO BE SEEN. 

That morning, he’d been 18, starry-eyed, fresh out of high school, and waiting at the doors of HYBE, because despite what everyone around him insisted, he knew that you didn’t need to graduate from a hero school to be someone great. All you had to do was want to help people. 

Unfortunately, his interviewer hadn’t felt the same way. She’d asked him two, maybe three questions (one of which had been whether he was the delivery driver with their coffee order), then sent him back into the lonely streets of Seoul. No job, no internship, not even a business card. 

What do you do when everything you’ve been working toward your entire life crumbles down around you? He truly isn’t sure.

The last thing Wooyoung wants is to go home. There, his mother and father will be waiting with him, arms crossed and condescending smiles shrouded in sympathy painted across their faces. His father will say, “You can’t win them all,” or, “Hey, it was a long shot anyway,” and Wooyoung will bite back tears as his fingernails dig crescents into his palms.

His mother will offer to make him some galbi-jjim, and he’ll agree, and every single bite will taste like pity. 

To delay this inevitable fate for as long as possible, Wooyoung decides to stop at the convenience store and drown his sorrows in a peach-passion-sunshine-candy-grapefruit-ade. And it works for all of five minutes, but then the cashier opens his stupid mouth, and everything goes to shit.

[nuoyipeach]

Happening Either Way

Lee Taeyong X Kang Seulgi, feat. Johnny Seo

warnings: none? tags: @gerardeveryway @gomseulgiii @innssanityyy @seulyongggi

Seulgi giggled as the man kept signaling her to shush. As tiring as it was, it gave her a slight thrill having to sneak around with her lover, who happened to be her brother's best friend.

She met Taeyong in high-school, when her brother Johnny brought him home to do some homework. They were only a year apart, and at first were casual friends, until one day when Johnny fell asleep and she decided to cook Taeyong something to eat.

Taeyong smacked his face as he accidently revealed he crushed on her, with the words "I wish you could be my wife" leaving his mouth just as he was trying to compliment her cooking. Seulgi didn't know whether to laugh or run, but as she watched the boy groan into his hands and apologise, it made her smile and reveal she wouldn't mind a husband like him either.

And so began the small flirtatious plays, which they didn't expect to lead to something more as Seulgi graduated high-school and joined the same university as her brother, where Taeyong also attended. Failing to hide the way they looked at each other, sneaking around to meet became very common even into their work lives.

Just like now, as Seulgi came to meet her brother at his job, where Taeyong also joined in. After passing something to Johnny, she went into boyfriend's office and wasn't shy to lock the door and take seat on his lap, surprising him to the max as she pulled his collar to kiss him.

Then came knocks on the door, followed by Johnny's voice. "Taeyong, you in? Let's go eat lunch!"

Taeyong quickly pushed her off his lips and shut her mouth with his hand, the other hand on her back to keep her from falling. Seulgi could only giggle, which earned her a quiet shush.

"Yea Johnny, you go ahead down, I'll be right there!" he replied loudly.

Johnny stood outside perplexed as he noticed the door locked, but thought nothing of it and simply agreed and left. The couple inside waited for the footsteps to die down, before Taeyong released a sigh of relief, removing his hand off Seulgi's mouth. She giggled again before hugging around his neck and brought her face close to his neck, leaving soft pecks.

"I missed you." she whispered, and could feel him finally smiling and his hands tightened their hold on her waist. "I wish you came with me to that party yesterday, I was all alone." she looked at him and pouted.

Taeyong sighed, pushing her hair behind her ear. "I'm sorry. If I had gone with you, Johnny would have found it suspicious."

"We could have said it's as friends?"

"He would have asked why me."

Seulgi sighed in defeat this time, clearly not pleased with his response. Taeyong was the one who pleaded they kept things a secret when it all started, afraid of hurting Johnny. He thought if anything bad were to happen between them, it would have ruined his friendship, and that was something he dreaded.

Seulgi was annoyed with it at first, but decided to respect his wishes. They didn't think the relationship would come so far for so long, and now face the issue of how to reveal it to her brother.

Leaving all these thoughts aside, she smiled at him before kissing again, but not for long as Taeyong's phone soon rang. The two peeked and saw Johnny's name across the screen, Seulgi rolling her eyes as she begrudgingly got off his lap. Before she could move away however, Taeyong grabbed her hand and held it tight, his other hand answering the call.

"Hey, I'm on my way down." he got up cutting the call and pulled her to himself, holding her body tight against hers. "Tonight, let me make it up to you hm?" the smile on her face enough of an answer for him, and they shared a final kiss before Seulgi left back to her work place, excited about their event that night.

>>>

Seulgi sat in the shower emotionless, unable to comprehend anything in her life. They were always cautious, but somehow fell into the rare cases. She sat contemplating, not sure how what to do from this point on. Should she go see a doctor? Or call her mother? Or call Johnny?

No. She knew the best thing to do.

She rang the bell few times, until the owner of the apartment opened and she threw herself onto his arms. "Baby what's wrong?" Taeyong immediately hugged her back and asked, slowly moving them further inside his apartment to the living room. He could feel her crying, and started brushing through her hair in an attempt to comfort her, knowing it works from a memory of Johnny doing it one time she cried at home.

She hadn't reached her goal on a test in college, and the two guys spent their evening cheering her up.

"Baby what's wrong? Tell me?" he slowly pulled her out and cupped her face in both hands. "Did something happen at work? Did someone hurt you?" she shook her head to both. He kissed her forehead before hugging her again. "Well whatever it is you can tell me, let's calm down first and then talk."

Seulgi sighed in relief as she pressed her head against his chest. She knew with Taeyong she wouldn't have to worry as much as she did. She knew she didn't have to be scared any longer. She knew no matter what happens, he would always be by her side.

Slowly she pulled away herself, and looked at him as she plucked up the courage to speak. "I'm... I'm pregnant..." her voice cracked, but she could tell Taeyong had heard her. "I'm pregnant, Taeyong..."

She watched his face for a reaction, only to be met by a sigh. He bit his bottom in thought, before slightly nodding his head and pulling her in for a hug. "I'll never leave you, I promise. I'm here for you throughout everything, whatever decisions you make." he kissed the top of her head. "I love you, and I'll give you the best life possible, I promise."

Seulgi was slightly confused by the response, and looked up at him. He smiled and pecked her lips before responding. "I'm ready for whatever comes our way now. We're having a baby, that's a whole new level of going into a relationship. And I know we haven't told anyone yet, but I want you to know no matter what happens, I'll never leave you. I'll run away with you if I had to."

Seulgi felt relieved, so much that her emotions took over as she started to cry again into his chest, hugging him tight as he continued comforting her. He pushed her gently as he moved them to sit on his couch, and slowly pulled her over to sit on his lap.

It took a good few minutes before she was just taking deep breaths, body still shaking in Taeyong's arms. Everything felt so chaotic. She was pregnant, with her secret lover of five years, who was her brother's best friend longer, and no one knew of them.

"How... How will we tell?" she asked softly. Taeyong hugged her tighter, placing a soft kiss on her head.

"Let's sleep on it tonight, you're overwhelmed and exhausted right now." he stood up, carrying her bridal style to the bedroom. He laid her down before sitting next to her, hugging her from the side with one hand resting on her tummy. "I'll think of something, we can start with your family. Rest now and stay for the night, tomorrow we'll go to the doctor."

>>>

After her checkup, Taeyong drove them to a restaurant for lunch, urging Seulgi to get whatever she wanted. He noticed her mood being slightly off since the morning, even during the checkup she was more silent than ever, and he only hoped she wasn't having regrets.

The food arrived, though he noticed her still poking at it after few minutes. "Is there something wrong?" he finally asked and watched as she stopped playing with the food and looed at him. "You've been acting off all morning. If there's anything bothering you, just tell me."

Seulgi sighed, biting her lips as she wondered what to say, and how. She met his eyes as she noticed him reach out and hold her hand, and felt her heart at ease as she always does at his touch. "I'm scared... I mean, from the moment I told you until now things have been going good. I'm scared of something bad happening..."

Noticing her bottom lip quiver, Taeyong moved to sit right next to her and pulled her into his embrace. "Like what?"

He knew she was near to crying, so allowed her time to get her words sorted out. "What if... my family says no?" she holds his free hand tight in both of hers.

"We will runaway and get married." he answered softly with a chuckle.

"What if... I lose the baby?"

"I'd still be with you, because I love you for you." he answered more seriously. He could tell she loved the answers as she pushed herself into him more, sighing in relief. His one hand went to her head petting it. "Let's not think about anything bad until something actually happens, OK? Just know that whatever does happen, I'll always be by your side."

Seulgi knew he would, and moved out to look at him, smiling weakly as she nodded. He cupped her face and wiped away the tears on her cheeks with his thumbs, before leaving a quick kiss on one. He then helped her finish her food, before they decided it was time to go and tell people, starting with her family.

Her hands shook as Seulgi texted for her family to gather at her parent's house right away, refusing to answer any questions from them about why just yet. As she put her phone down, she felt Taeyong's one hand hold one of hers and give it a reassuring squeeze, and she smiled again at him, which even with his eyes on the road he could tell as he smiled back.

They reached, and knew Johnny beat them to it noticing his black shiny car parked behind her father's. Taeyong allowed a few more minutes for them to sit in the car as he watched her take breaths to help calm herself, patting her chest with one hand while he held the other kissing her knuckles.

After a couple of minutes, she looked up and nodded, and they quickly walked to the house as she feared she might make a run for it herself if she wasn't there soon enough. She opened the door herself and walked in first, motioning Taeyong to wait at the door first. She headed to the living room, her presence immediately known as all three of her family looked up.

Her mother ran to her hugging as she could tell something was off. "What's wrong baby?" she held her daughter's face. "You're making me so worried, what's happening?"

Her lips quivered again as she took her mother's hands in hers, looking down at her feet before finally picking up the courage to speak, looking back up at her family, Johnny and her father also staring at her with concern. She was their baby girl after all, no matter how old.

"I'm sorry... Johnny." she saw her brother's eyebrows furrow, and she moved away from her mother to stand more centered to everyone. "It's Taeyong..."

"IS HE OK?" Johnny screamed, clearly thinking the worst. "WELL SEULGI?"

She waved her hands. "No no, I mean, I am sorry about something. I don't regret it, I know now I don't. But I'm still sorry to you." she looked at the door, where Taeyong had been hiding to watch from, and he took it as a signal to enter. He came in and stood next to her, bowing to greet everyone. "I'm... pregnant."

"WHAT?" she heard her father and Johnny's voice yell, and looked to see her mother's knees wobble as she fell onto the nearest seat. Before she could say anymore, her father walked up and grabbed Taeyong by the collar, which she quickly intercepted.

"Dad please! Listen to us please!" she was on the verge of tears, which was what prompted the older man to let go. "I'm sorry, but I don't know how else to say it..."

"Let me." Taeyong cut her off, holding her by the shoulders and pushing her aside, a look of reassurance. She trusted him, and nodded before he looked back at his best friend and their father. "Seulgi and I have been seeing each other since university, so please understand what happened wasn't the case of us being careless. We didn't tell anyone because... because I was afraid of Johnny."

The said man raised an eyebrow, his eyes flaming with anger. "When we started, it wasn't anything serious so we didn't think it was something to tell you. Then it got serious, and I was scared you'd hate it. I know how much you love your sister, and how protective you are, I've been there all the time. We decided to not tell you until we'd make it a hundred percent official because, well, I fell in love." his eyes shifted towards Seulgi, who was holding his hand hiding her face in his shoulder.

"But I was scared, that if something happened between us it would break our friendship. As time went by, I knew I'd never leave her, but I didn't want to lose you too. We never had a proper plan of when or how to break the news, but now... things happened." his eyes darted towards Seulgi's tummy, his hand holding hers tight before he looked back at all of them. "I will take care of her, love her, protect her, with everything I have. I won't let a single tear appear in her eyes. And I've already told her, I'm not just saying all this because of the baby, it's just with the baby there's no way or reason for us to hide. I have no regrets in loving Seulgi and our relationship, but I do regret not letting any of you know, and for that I am truly sorry."

Silence took over, and Seulgi fell to the couch behind her as she felt the weight of everything push her down. Taeyong helped her, before looking back at his friend, who simply turned in his spot and brushed his hair back frustatingly. "Johnny, please say something." he spoke up, trying to get some reaction other than the silent treatment, though he wasn't expecting what he got.

"Shut up!" Johnny turned to them, eyes filled with rage, shocking even his parents. "You're supposed to be my bestfriend, so tell me exactly how the f*ck could you hide something like this from me!?! I never hid anything from you, but I also never pushed you to tell me every single detail of your life to me. But THIS!?! You were doing things with MY SISTER for five years, how do you expect me to react!?!"

Silence took over again as he paced around, loud breaths heard from him as he tried his best composing himself before turning back to the couple. "I want to say I'm happy for you, that I wish you all the best. Maybe in another time or world I do. But right now I can't." with that he left, everyone except Seulgi following behind him as he went out of the house and into his car, speeding off and out of sight. The parents sighed and went back inside, but Taeyong stood at the door longer, his chest hurting as he tried not to cry.

"Lee Taeyong." he heard their father's voice and quickly came back inside, seeing Seulgi was now sitting with her mother while the elder man stood hands crossed. "You will marry her, and make sure your duties as a husband and father are met because I will come for you." Taeyong bowed, softly thanking for their somewhat of a blessing.

Their father then turned to Seulgi. "And you, I don't know what to say... but I speak for all three of us, we are disappointed. Not about your relationship or the getting pregnant part, although I think you should have been more careful. But the fact that you've been fooling around with your brother's best friend all these years and didn't think to tell him at least?"

"Please, it's not her fault." Taeyong cut in and came closer to the family. "I was the one who didn't want to tell Johnny, she just... respected my wishes."

"Even so!" this time her mother spoke up. "Hiding something like this from the people you love, how are we supposed to trust each other anymore? Forget us, didn't either of you think how Johnny would have felt? How he feels right now? I know for a fact he would have loved seeing you two happy even if that meant you'd be together, that's not what hurt Johnny. It's the fact that you've both broken his trust, both as his sister and best friend..."

>>>

Taeyong's mind was filled with his now future mother-in-law's words. He and Johnny have been through thick and thin for the past ten years, and this one small yet big obstacle might just ruin that. And if that's ruined, how could he face him as Seulgi's husband?

He needed to fix things, as soon as he could. Why not now? he thought as he got up in a rush and left the bedroom, dashing past Seulgi in the living room who simply stared in confusion. She was staying over as they decided it would be for the best, and she'd slowly start moving in soon.

He got into his car and drove off, trying to get to his friend's apartment as fast as he could. Once reaching, he went up and rang the bell a couple of times, until it opened. Except, there was a lady.

Taeyong's rush of adrenaline paused as he stared confused. "Uhm... who are you?" he asked straight away as he knew he didn't have the wrong apartment. "What are you doing here? And where's Johnny?"

The lady opened the door further to let Taeyong come in a bit. "I'm Joohyun, we've been seeing each other for some time. I'm here because we were supposed to have dinner, but Johnny left a few minutes ago, said he needed some space." the lady counted off the questions on her fingers, then smiled awkwardly at him. "You're Taeyong, aren't you? He's always speaking about you. He didn't say what happened, but I guess you guys had an issue? He's probably on the roof, uhm..." she silenced before continuing, leaving him confused again.

Regardless, he thanked her and headed back to the elevator and up to the roof terrace, stepping out and looking around. He saw the figure of his best friend standing aside near the barrier, a small glass of what he assumed was whiskey in his hand. He walked behind him slowly, taking soft breaths as he prepared himself to say what he had been thinking of.

Once close enough, he sighed getting Johnny's attention, though he only peeked a bit before shaking his head and taking another sip of his drink. "Johnny, look at me please..." he bit his lips nervously, waiting for some response, only to get silence in response. At this point Taeyong was exhausted, and let out all thought.

"Johnny I'm sorry. And I know you'll probably never forgive me, but I'll work for that. I broke our trust just because I was scared that you'd reject us being together, because I knew how much you cared and protected her, but I realise now I was wrong. I shouldn't have thought of that when you're such a great friend and brother."

He watched his friend take one last sip of the drink before placing the glass away on a nearby tea table. Johnny stared out at the city, letting out a deep breath, before finally taking a small look at Taeyong.

"Where are you going with this attempt at justifying yourself?"

Sighing, Taeyong walked up to stand right next to him, staring at the city too. "I'm not trying to justify what we did. I just want to explain it, and that I'm forever sorry for it. You've always respected our boundaries, you were always there for me when I needed someone, then here I am messing around with someone you care for so much..."

"Messing around?" the sudden stone cold voice caught his attention as Taeyong looked to see Johnny mad. "Is that what you're calling it? Because if it is I'd suggest you not get married if you're not gonna take her seriously."

"Johnny that's not what I meant..." Taeyong turned fully this time. "At first it was just flirting, but the more time we spent together, the more I fell in love with her. I never told you because I didn't want to ruin our friendship, and then one day when it was just me and her, things just clicked and... we confessed. At that point neither of us knew where it was going, that's why we couldn't tell you. If anything went bad between us, we didn't want you to get involved and have to pick sides. I mean, she's your sister, so you'd be together no matter what... what about me?" his voice suddenly cracked, much to both their surprise.

"I couldn't lose you, you're my best friend, my only close friend, someone who I can count on if not my family. Even now if you don't wanna talk to me, I will do anything for us to go back to normal, because I realised my biggest fear is true only because of me. I realised that if we had told you about us when we figured it was serious, you wouldn't have forced us apart or anything. Maybe you'd be cautious, but you'd be supportive, because that's who you are."

Johnny's eyes stayed on the landscape of the city, nothing coming out of him but the sound of his deep breaths. Taeyong wasn't moving, he wouldn't at all until getting some kind of response, even a punch.

"Do you know why I'm mad?" he finally spoke, turning to Taeyong fully so they now faced eye to eye. "It is weird that my long term best friend is dating my younger sister, but that wasn't even in my top five. What pissed me off was knowing that someone I trusted the most in my life was, in your words, messing around with my sister behind my back. I get it, you liked each other, but the chances of it being nothing more than a fling for you is what got on my nerves. You say you've been there with us for so long, then you should have known that the last thing I wanted was for her to be with someone who doesn't take her seriously."

"But Johnny I do take her seriously. My feelings for her weren't just a one time thing..."

Johnny sighed, looking away again before turning back. "Then why hide it from me?" the question Taeyong dreaded. "I get if you'd hide it from our parents at first, but me? If you were serious about her, you shouldn't have had the slightest idea to keep this a secret from me. If anything I would've helped you guys, yes I'd be weirded out at first, but if it is as serious as you say it is, who am I to stop my sister and best friend be happy?"

Silence took over as the two men stood looking whichever direction they could to avoid eye contact, especially Taeyong.

"I'm not just mad at you by the way." Johnny spoke again. "Seulgi knows how special you are to me, so it doubled the anger that she decided to get reckless with you when, like you said, if anything went wrong it would build a wall between us." He turned and leaned over the wall on his arms, staring into the city again. Taeyong sighed, walking over to the wall too, keeping a little distance between, and leaning on his back instead.

It was again nothing but silence for a longer time. "I want you to be my best man." Taeyong spoke up first, causing Johnny to turn his head immediately. "I'm not trying to butter up to you or anything after all this, you were always my choice no matter who I married. And despite everything now, I still want you to be my best man."

"When's the wedding?" Johnny asked, eyes still on his friend.

"Not sure yet, but we will get married soon. Your parents kinda threatened me about that." he tried to hold in a chuckle but failed. "I mean I would have married her anyways, but yea, with them on it I'm thinking as soon as possible." he watched as his friend look back at the city, before gently nodding his head.

A sense of relief washed over him, and Taeyong couldn't help but move towards Johnny and hug him from the side. "I'm sorry Johnny. And thank you."

>>>

After hours of labour and pain and medication, Seulgi was relieved when her baby was no longer in her tummy, but in her arms instead. She smiled weakly as the nurse readied her to hold the baby against her chest, something about skin on skin contact, she wasn't entirely sure as her mind was too tired to absorb anything but the little boy she stared at with the biggest smile on her face.

She heard a loud gasp beside, shifting her eyes slightly towards her husband who's eyes shook at the sight. He was covered up mask and all, but she could tell from just his eyes that he felt the same as she did. "You did it love." Taeyong whispered before leaning his forehead against hers. "You did so well. You're amazing. Our baby is here."

Seulgi couldn't help the tear escape her eye, but with a smile on her face. "We did it."

And as soon as mother and baby were cleaned up, the first person Taeyong let into the room was Johnny, who practically ran past him as he walked up to the bed, eyes on both his sister and the little blanket bundle in her arms. He smiled at Seulgi, before giving her forehead a soft kiss, when she motioned him to carry the baby.

His hands shook as Johnny held his nephew close to his chest, Taeyong standing next to him with a smile as well. He moved closer, moving a little bit of the blanket away from the baby's face, as he suddenly spoke. "Say hello Lee Minwoo, this is your uncle, and godfather."

Johnny's head whipped towards Taeyong at the mention of the last word, who could only smile with a nod. He then turned to his sister who did the same, before letting out a soft laugh looking back at the baby. "Your parents are a crazy handful, so good thing I'll be there for you if they decide to pull another stunt on us again." He said as he gently pecked the baby's head.

The couple only laughed. Things were still hard after that night on the roof, but Johnny pushed through and did whatever he had to for the wedding, and later Seulgi's pregnancy. The couple didn't put him through much either as they gave him his space and time to come to terms with everything little by little. But during the wedding Taeyong saw and couldn't be happier as he watched Johnny smile his way through a very negative conversation with somebody

"I hear they're pregnant. You must feel betrayed they did such a thing behind your back."

Johnny smiled, chuckling. "On the contrary, I'm thrilled for them. As long as they're happy, I'm happy. Who do you think chose the flavour of the wedding cake?"

"You can trust him Minwoo." Taeyong said as he ushered Johnny to sit with the baby. "He's the best for us two, so he'll definitely be for you."

>>>

so the ending was a bit rushed (are you even surprised atp lol) & I cudnt keep it as comedic as I hoped bcuz I kinda got carried away😅 I still hope you like it anon💚😊

[demonlullaby]

SPOTIFY WRAPPED 2022

Should have probably posted this when everyone else was, but better late than never lol

Happy 2023!

TOP SONGS OF THE YEAR

MANIAC - Stray Kids

CHEERS - SEVENTEEN

hellboy. - CVLTE

Ruby - WOOZI

Same Scent - ONEUS

Hard to Love - BLACKPINK

HOT - SEVENTEEN

Lonely St. - Stray Kids

Wrecked - Imagine Dragons

Hang on to Yourself - Palaye Royale

Ash - SEVENTEEN

Blood // Water - grandson

Good Boy Gone Bad - TXT

Shut Down - BLACKPINK

DON QUIXOTE - SEVENTEEN

Bones - Imagine Dragons

Feelin' Like - PENTAGON

CHIQUITA - Rocket Punch

Shadow - SEVENTEEN

VENOM - Stray Kids

begin - YooJung (onlyoneof)

HIJACK - WOODZ

March - SEVENTEEN

PLAY - LUCY

Sparkling - CHUNGHA

Enemy - Imagine Dragons

_WORLD - SEVENTEEN

FEARLESS - LE SSERAFIM

Crazy Like You - CHUNGHA ft. BIBI

Pale Blue Dot - LOONA

Anyone - SEVENTEEN

Save Yourself - ONE OK ROCK

Nightmares In Paradise - Palaye Royale

Better and better - WOODZ

Rock with you - SEVENTEEN

Done - WJSN

DICE - ONEW

Broken Heart of Gold - ONE OK ROCK

Darl+ing - SEVENTEEN

As You Wish - WJSN

Flip That - LOONA

maybe - Machine Gun Kelly ft. Bring Me The Horizon

California Dream - CHUNGHA

Last Sequence - WJSN

Lost At Sea (Illa Illa 2) - B.I

0X1=LOVESONG - TXT

KULT - grandson

The Great Mermaid - LE SSERAFIM

I hate you - WOODZ

LOVE DIVE - IVE

RUN2U - STAYC

Accident - WOODZ

FREEZE - Stray Kids

I think I'm OKAY - Machine Gun Kelly ft. YUNGBLUD

Heart Burn - SUNMI

Stupid O'Clock - VICTON

Until We Go Down - Ruelle

Pretty Psycho - PURPLE KISS

Heroine - SUNMI

MAGO - GFRIEND

XXX - CHUNGHA

BOP BOP! - VIVIZ

Me Myself & I - 5SOS

TOMBOY - GIDLE

BTBT - B.I

Gasoline - KEY

Dirt on my leather - WOODZ

LA DI DA - EVERGLOW

Any - Stray Kids

MAISON - Dreamcatcher

Thursday's Child Has Far To Go - TXT

DON'T MESS WITH ME - BVNDIT

MIROH - Stray Kids

Eden - OH MY GIRL

Lonely Boy - TXT

Blow - Jackson Wang

Modern Life - WOOSUNG

Labyrinth - GFRIEND

La Luna - ICHILLIN'

Doom Du Doom - P1Harmony

Beg For Me - Red Velvet

PUMA - TXT

Charmer - Stray Kids

Can't Stop This Party - Seori

Queen of Hearts - TWICE

9 and Three Quarters (Run Away) - TXT

Thunderous - Stray Kids

Nerdy - PURPLE KISS

Feel Good - IRENE & SEULGI (Red Velvet)

Opening Sequence - TXT

WHO WE ARE - RAVI

Stay Tonight - CHUNGHA

Can't Control Myself - TAEYEON

Devil - MAX CHANGMIN

So Far Gone - ONE OK ROCK

Love Me Out Loud - CHUNGHA

Copycat - Apink CHOBOM

Beatbox - NCT DREAM

VISION - Dreamcatcher

Mixtape : OH - Stray Kids

TOP ARTISTS OF THE YEAR

SEVENTEEN

Stray Kids

CHUNGHA

ONE OK ROCK

ATEEZ

TWICE

ITZY

BIBI

5SOS

TXT

DAY6

Dreamcatcher

NCT 127

Palaye Royale

SUNMI

KEY

Red Velvet

LUCY

TAEMIN

WOODZ

GIDLE

DPR IAN

The Rose

KANG DANIEL

EXO

EVERGLOW

Fall Out Boy

Bastille

LOONA

ONEUS

LE SSERAFIM

Imagine Dragons

Xdinary Heroes

B.I

YUNGBLUD

Rocket Punch

PENTAGON

BLACKPINK

BAEKHYUN

WJSN

ONEWE

PURPLE KISS

SHINee

Seori

A.C.E

HyunA

Halsey

Måneskin

Machine Gun Kelly

p!atd

[cherrylipsanditsrainingstars]

heartbreak era, lol

warnings: ok, this is smut, kinda (& angst i think)(fluff at the end) and know this is weird for a first post and I'm pretty sure it swears

she does not have a crush on you so ur practically lonely and emo

also, I'm forcing u to listen to nintendhoe but, it has nothing to do with this story

(p.s, you fall in love with wendy at the end and you kiss like once)

'come over'

you knew what she wanted

but, you were a toy to her

your feelings couldn't be changed, right?

your last encounter managed to make you realize the truth

but, you always say that, your feelings could never change

lips on your neck could be felt

"go to sleep, you have a big day, tomorrow"

her arms wrapped around your exposed waist

her hands travelling north

red marks were placed along your neck

"do you love me?"

"no, we agreed that this was just a friends with benefits thing until my girlfriend comes back, remember?"

bitch, using you like that

"yeah"

you needed to do something, having your fucking feelings played with is not fun

but, you knew you would long for her touch

maybe you could go on a date with yeri or ask wendy to set you up with one of her friends or maybe you could ask joy out

using people for selfish reasons, using their feelings

reminds me of kang seulgi using you because her girlfriend, irene, is in america

fuck seulgi

why can't seulgi stop breaking hearts?

one last time couldn't be bad

you turn to face her

your lips meeting hers

her tongue dancing with yours

you straddle her

ripping her pyjama shirt off

leaving her chest exposed

her arms were pinned down

your fingers teasing her, going down ever so slowly

the begs that were released out of her mouth annoyed you

her underwear was discarded

your fingers pumped in and out of her

quickly but, every time she moaned your fingers stopped

she grinded her hips into your fingers for friction but, nothing came

when, she was close to release

you left

you left her apartment and hopefully her life

wendy picked you up that night

you told her feelings about seulgi and how you felt

"hey, sometimes, love may not be returned"

"is that supposed to help?"

"i think, you want ice cream?"

"yeah, mint chocolate please"

"eww, can't believe you like eating toothpaste"

"excuse me, you're the basic bitch"

"me, I'm the basic bitch? you're the one doing..."

"exactly, you can't think of anything"

you two laughed and ate ice cream, talking and watching the stars

eventually, after the laughter died down (though, there was a few chuckles here and there due to wendys greasy lines)

"you got a little ice cream moustache, let me get that off" she says

she leans in

her lips touch yours

"i'm sorry, i know you ju-"

you kissed, meaningfully

you arms looped around her neck

love is in front of you not, behind you

~the end~

ok, so, i was going to call this a heartbreak and a heartbeat but, whatever

well, bye <3

[ttoddii]

how they would be like as your girlfriend headcanons (irene – seulgi – wendy)

pairing(s) – bae joohyun x f!reader; kang seulgi x f!reader; son seungwan x f!reader

genre – fluff, headcanons

warnings – lowercase intended, bad grammar, not proofread.

a/n – this is my formal application to be debut in the red velvet writers community, i hope you guys enjoy and part 2 with joy and yeri will be out soon.

taglist – @missminho; @taniio; @vvsbada; @krissysays (comment under my posts to be add/remove)

NEXT (joy – yeri)

✮⋆˙ bae joohyun ˙⋆✮

⊹₊ ⋆ joohyun would be the protective type, but not the "i can fight" type of protective, but the "let me do this for you" type.

⊹₊ ⋆ her love language would be acts of service and words of affirmation.

⊹₊ ⋆ she's the woman, she knows her values, and she would not accept anything less than what she expect, so you gotta please her.

⊹₊ ⋆ loving her would include giving her words of affirmation, things like "i love you"; "i appreciate what you did for me"; just tell her that you love her and appreciate everything she do for you and she would gladly do it again, she's a big softie for you.

⊹₊ ⋆ "baby do you think i look good in this?"

⊹₊ ⋆ she would ask you for your opinions on things, her clothes, her work, her singing, her dancing, your opinions matter so so much to her.

⊹₊ ⋆ even though she would do things for you, sometimes you would also be the one who that role, taking care of her if she's too busy with work, and she appreciate you so much for your thoughtfulness.

⊹₊ ⋆ it's really sweet how you guys would take care of each other in this relationship, there is really no "dom" and "sub" dynamic, you guys just take care of the other person if they need more help.

⊹₊ ⋆ "please eat this it's good for you"

⊹₊ ⋆ she would take care of you to the smallest details, like your food, your clothes, your make up, how you feel everyday, she would make sure to check up on you.

⊹₊ ⋆ bae joohyun is overall the wife material.

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ bonus ~ !

"baby do you think you can do the laundry today?", joohyun asked, her form focusing on the sheet of paper in her hand as she furrows her brows.

and so you stare, admiring how pretty she look when she focus on her work, her hair falls down beautifully as she quickly tuck it to the side of her ears, not wanting it to fall down on her paper.

as you pick up the basket of clothes, you step closer to her before lightly land a kiss on the top of her hair and smile softly.

"yes of course darling"

✮⋆˙kang seulgi ˙⋆✮

⊹₊ ⋆ seulgi is the cool girlfriend, the one that would let you rely on her when you guys go outside together, but a big teddy bear when you guys are alone.

⊹₊ ⋆ her love language would be quality time and physical touch.

⊹₊ ⋆ seulgi would act all cool on the outside, paying stuff for you, holding your things, open the door, but then a big big softie when you guys are alone, demanding to be hug, kiss, and cuddle.

⊹₊ ⋆ she would love to go out on dates with you, picnics, travelling together, go to art museums, she just love being around you and spending time with you.

⊹₊ ⋆ she loves loves loves taking candid pictures of you.

⊹₊ ⋆ "you look pretty today"

⊹₊ ⋆ her phone would be full of pictures of the two of you, or you alone. and when you ask why she has so many pictures of you she would give you an excuse of "wanting to show you off to others".

⊹₊ ⋆ she is a big baby around you, wanting to get all your attention.

⊹₊ ⋆ definitely will get jealous and throw a tantrum if you're not giving her enough attention, but then it would just end up with you guys cuddling in bed.

⊹₊ ⋆ she would not be scared to show affections to you in public at all, holding your hands, hugging you, kissing your cheeks and be all lovey dovey.

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ bonus ~ !

you turn around to look at seulgi on the bed, wrapping herself in your blanket as she scribble a sketch in her note.

"who are you drawing?", you asked softly, your body moving closer to the bed as she scoot over and give you space.

her face lift up to look at you before she smile brightly, her soft gaze make you melt as she usher you to get closer to her. and you did, moving to be right next to her side as she give you a kiss on your cheek and wrap an arm around your shoulder to hold you down to the bed.

"it's you lovely, look nice?"

✮⋆˙ son seungwan ˙⋆✮

⊹₊ ⋆ seungwan would be the romantic and smart girlfriend.

⊹₊ ⋆ her love language would be giving gifts and words of affirmations.

⊹₊ ⋆ this woman knows, she knows how to make you feel all sort of butterflies in your stomach.

⊹₊ ⋆ "i bought you flowers today!"

⊹₊ ⋆ she would shower you in lavish gifts – clothes, make up products, flowers, perfumes, etc. – anything you want, she deliver.

⊹₊ ⋆ she would be so nice to you too, if you need help with anything at all, she would help you with it. she's a talented and smart woman, it seems like she knows everything in the world that you don't.

⊹₊ ⋆ "oh you need help with this part? let me take a look at it"

⊹₊ ⋆ sometimes you would wonder how could you scored this woman, comparing yourself with how smart she is, to bitterly think you doesn't deserve her.

⊹₊ ⋆ but she would definitely make you think again, making you feel like the most special girl in the whole wide world with a special dinner, taking you out so you can forget all the troubles in the world.

⊹₊ ⋆ she would give you lots of compliment to constantly remind you that you're so special to her.

⊹₊ ⋆ "princess i love you a lot, always remember that".

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ bonus ~ !

"seungwan why did you date me?", you asked, wondering why she would choose you our of everyone else, surely you're not as good as others, and if you compare yourself to her, she's like a bright sun you can never reach.

she look down to you, her brows furrow a bit as she stare into your eyes, her hands cup your cheeks as she give you a tender kiss on your lips. her hand taking yours as she hold it tightly.

"oh my baby, of course it's because i love you, and you're just perfect the way you are. i love how you smile, and how hard working you are towards everything. you always try your best, and i admire you for that."

[seullovesme]

JK GUYS.. seulgi posted this on her story and theres no way she's gonna be this fine and i dont write abt it

[campaffluenza]

* ◟  🔪  𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐒 , 𝑪𝑨𝑴𝑬𝑹𝑨 , 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍  ⸻  congratulations , LEXI ! you’ve been cast as the mythic bitch. the ferry to camp leaves in twenty four hours , so be sure to check in sometime soon. ( kang seulgi )

* ◟ ( kang seulgi . cis female . she/her . aromantic bisexual . ) look’s like alexandria 'lexi' frost  made the tabloids again! some story about shutting down a museum for a day only to leave after an hour… or being pictured shopping in venice again. according to insider, they turned twenty six last 10/31 and already have a net worth of $650 million, all from their grandfather founding a major production comapny? i bet they’d buy their damage control from louis vuitton if they could. they seem pretty apathetic and astute — must be why the article’s dubbed the mythic bitch of that new horror movie. 

— if we're being meta, the red herring would be lexi as she comes across as a secretly evil nightmare character, the big bad if this were a teen drama. this however is a lot more complicated, and she's just an annoying bitch who hangs out with people just a little bit poorer than her to constantly feel superior. she's the type that peaked at highschool, who lives that queen bee style, while still seeming apathetic about it all - lexi is hedonistic, and she gets what she wants, it's not hard to see why people would think her a demon walking. truthfully she's just never heard the word no and she spends too much time watching movies and messing around online with fake name accounts... 

 ⌇ idunn . she/they . 22 . nzst . 

[jongdaemiamor]

god is a woman

if repost, give me credits.

fav or reblog if saved.

please, please! don't say it's yours.

[sevlgi]

hit and run

requested: no

group: blackpink

pairing: rosé x fem!reader

genre: a  shit ton of angst, some fluff

contents: idol!rosé, actress!y/n, closeted!rosé, costar!au, slight enemies-to-lovers, unhappy endings because i’m a bitch, a lot of attempted cinematic parallels, italicized dialogue is when they’re speaking as their characters

warnings: slight homophobia

synopsis: There’s absolutely no reason for you to get involved with a costar who you should hate by all accounts. But of course, you manage to forget that love is usually more like a hit-and-run than a cruise ship. 

a/n: while i was writing this, i  imagined this as what happened before rosie sang��“gone”, so maybe you can think of it like that too? i’m honestly so terrified of this flopping lmao... 

for a little background on the film: Y/N plays Luna, a pirate captain who unknowingly sacrificed her family in order to have the power to fight the regime that Rosé’s character Helen is a part of. Helen approaches Luna, determined to help her bring justice, but Helen is unable to choose between the benefits of staying with the regime, and following what she knows is right and destroying her life as a result.

word count: 6.8k

The last thing you want to hear on the morning of your first script reading is that the actress playing your love interest in the film has changed.

“What?” you say loudly, straightening in the backseat. Your manager frowns, and you sit obediently, but the scowl doesn’t leave your face. “What do you mean the actress changed?”

“Yeah. She had to leave the movie at the last minute,” he sighs.

Sooyoung was chosen alongside you, after lengthy interviews testing whether the two of you would be able to handle your characters’ dynamic. It took weeks for the director to decide that you were the pair that she wanted, so the news that you’ll be meeting your costar for the first time in front of paparazzi is quite the shock to your system. “Shit. Then who’s the replacement?”

Your manager presses his lips together firmly before answering, “Park Chaeyoung. She’s an idol.”

You groan and slump down again. “Great. Another idol actress? Please don’t tell me that this is her first role too. Oh god, is she straight?”

“Yes to all of the above,” Chan says tensely.

Maybe you’re being dramatic, but it’s honestly a big deal. It’s the first leading role you’ve bagged, especially in a mainstream LGBTQ+ movie, and Sooyoung was the best costar you could’ve picked. You’ve never met Park Chaeyoung before, and you already know that all your plans are going to be messed up.

Chan pulls the car into the parking lot, and you scowl when you realize that most of the paparazzi have arrived. “We’re going around the back. Y/N, promise me one thing: don’t make a scene, okay?” your manager pleads. “I’m not happy about it either, but Chaeyoung has a good reputation. You’ll just ruin yours if you blow up at her.”

“I promise,” you answer through gritted teeth. You slip through the open side door as soon as you get out of the car, ignoring Chan’s call after you to have a good time like you would’ve.

To make matters worse, you don’t even get a chance to talk to the director or Chaeyoung before you’re swarmed by a crowd of reporters, even if that ‘talk’ would’ve consisted of more yelling than anything. “Y/N, Y/N!”

“Okay, let her up!” Seulgi shouts, pushing her way through. She grips your arm to lead you towards the cast table, whispering under her breath, “I’ll explain later. But just run with it, okay?”

You have plenty of problems with idol actresses, but you’ve never been inclined to say all those problems to their faces. Until now, that is.  Now, you’re sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with a girl you know has absolutely no credentials to be playing the other role in your upcoming movie, resisting the urge to ball your script up and throw it in her face.

There’s nothing wrong with Park Chaeyoung as a person-- she’s admittedly gorgeous, probably sweet, and you’re sure she isn’t a bad actress in any sense. The only thing wrong with the situation is that she’s painfully straight and auditioning to be your love interest in what might be Korea’s first mainstream lesbian film, and that you have never spoken to her before.

Chaeyoung avoids your stare with a clenched jaw, and in normal circumstances, you would already be apologizing profusely for making her uncomfortable. In this circumstance, though, your obvious grudge against her only contributes to the dynamic her character is supposed to have with yours.

“Miss Kang, is it true that the actors were only picked today?” 

The director grimaces, and the both of you turn to look at the cameras flashing by the sides of the room. It was never the plan to allow paparazzi to sit in on the first reading that you and Chaeyoung would be doing together, especially since it’s true that Chaeyoung was only chosen hours ago, after the original actress bailed. Even though your grudge should be against the girl who left, it’s easier to glare at the one sitting next to you. “Not exactly. Y/N has been confirmed for the role of Luna for months, but we recently added Chaeyoung as Helen. But we can assure that their chemistry will be wonderful,” Seulgi reassures the audience. What a lie.

Yet another reporter calls out, “How much of the script will we be seeing today, and when will the trailer be released?”

“Since the casting was changed today, the trailer has been delayed,” Seulgi says. You can hear the panic in her voice, and clear your throat. “As for the script… we’re only doing part of one scene that will show up in the trailer today, so we’ll just let them begin. Y/N?”

As you take a sip of water to prepare yourself, you almost hope that Chaeyoung messes up her part. It would be bad press, sure, and it would only contribute to Seulgi’s stress, but it would be satisfying for her to realize that she doesn’t deserve her part. She’s just an idol, after all, and she’s taking away representation from the people who need it.

“Are you saying you’re better than me?” you begin, your voice ice-cold.

You watch Chaeyoung’s throat bob, but her voice is steady and clear when she says her line. “No! I’m not saying that I’m better than you… but by all accounts, there’s no way you should have this power.”

“Would you be less scared then?” You pause, watch as Chaeyoung’s expression changes to the panic that her character’s would. “I’m kidding, Helen. I did things to get these powers, things that I’m not proud of.”

“Why would you do that? You’re strong… you don’t need them.”

“I’ve never been-- shit.” The tips of your ears start to burn, and suddenly, your lines are swimming before your eyes. Maybe all your hoping and wishing that Chaeyoung messes up has reflected onto you instead.

She attempts to remind you, “I haven’t always--”

“I know,” you hiss, but your voice is too loud in the silent room. Chaeyoung turns bright pink, too, but you still can’t seem to say your lines out loud. Shit, shit, shit--

“I’m just trying to help,” she sighs.

You whip your head to glare at her, and she winces at the daggers you send in her direction. “Shut the hell up--”

“Okay, the script reading will end here,” Seulgi announces loudly, and you bite down hard on your tongue. You don’t dare to look at the other cast members, don’t dare to think about how they must be guilting you for cutting their PR short. “Thank you everyone, please leave with security.”

You stay in your seat, staring at your script with burning eyes until you feel a hand on your shoulder and jolt. “Hey,” Chaeyoung reminds you, “we can leave.”

“Don’t touch me” is your only answer, and you storm out of the room. Alone.

The next time you see Chaeyoung is the next day, at a script-reading that the paparazzi knows nothing about. (You do see a friend request from a Park Chaeyoung the night before, but you ignore it.)

Seulgi attempts a smile, but it doesn’t hide the bags under her eyes. She claps and raises her voice to get the cast’s attention. “Okay, everyone. We didn’t get what we wanted yesterday, but that’s fine. Um… let’s try yesterday’s scene from Chaeyoung’s part, okay? From ‘you don’t need them’.”

Chaeyoung nods. “You’re strong… you don’t need them,” she starts, worry tinging into her voice.

“I haven’t always been strong,” you reply, your voice harsher than it should be just to stop yourself from messing up again.

“Still. Powers aren’t everything, Luna, it’s too hard to have them.”

You sigh. “Newsflash, princess. It’s harder not to.”

“But--” Chaeyoung interjects.

“Did you ever think,” you cut her off, “that I didn’t care that it’d be hard? Did you ever think that the rest of us are tired of you abusing the thing that you’re given, but we have to fight for?”

You look right to Seulgi once you finish, ignoring the part underneath that says you should look to Chaeyoung at the end of the scene. The director smiles anyway. “That was great, you two. I think you capture the tension perfectly, which is a relief.”

You fight the urge to laugh. “I know that changing our main cast so close to the actual production is really difficult,” Seulgi sighs. “And I’m really sorry to inconvenience you all. The schedule is really squished now, and we just have to work through it. Chaeyoung, Y/N, all I ask is that you try to work together, okay? I know you’ll be amazing together.”

Chaeyoung speaks, possibly for the first time besides her lines. “Of course, Ms. Bae. I’ll do my best.”

“I’m sure. We have to cut this short, again, but we’re scheduled for costume fitting right now,” Seulgi groans. “We have to at least get the outfits for the trailer to fit. Sorry, everyone. Down the hall, okay?”

Of course, you and Chaeyoung have to get fit together. The only sound in the hallway is that of her heels clicking on the wood, and you resist the urge to shout at her to stop. Luckily, you arrive in the fitting room before you can.

Your eyes widen at the dress hanging there. It’s incredible, even without the layers that would support the skirt-- you can’t even imagine how the beading and pink silk would look on Chaeyoung. Ethereal, probably. “Y/N, yours is here,” the costume director laughs, beckoning you over.

Even though your own outfit isn’t nearly as opulent, you can’t help but admire the gold detailing on the cuffs and the tailoring. “Thank god yours doesn’t take so much sewing,” the director grunts, pinning the side. “You know, the two of you are going to look fantastic in these, even if we have to spill all that blood on them to shoot the trailer.”

“Sooyoung would’ve looked better.” It’s mean, and it’s a low blow, but the director doesn’t take your bait.

She pokes her head out to where Chaeyoung’s being fitted. “Now? Okay, Y/N, go out there. We need to take a look at the two of you together.”

You can’t stop your jaw from dropping when you see Chaeyoung. She’s all candyfloss hair and gold adorning her tiny waist, and in all her glory, you can’t stop yourself from thinking that maybe she was made for the role. “You look really good,” she compliments softly.

Nodding stiffly, you turn for the seamstresses. Chaeyoung moves to fiddle with her gloves when she realizes that you have absolutely no interest in continuing the conversation.

Well, if there’s one thing you can nitpick about her, it isn’t how she looks; she looks absolutely perfect for the role of Princess Helen, maybe even more perfect than Sooyoung. 

One of the costume directors steps in. “Okay, you can get changed out, but you have to come back in a few hours,” she tells you. “We have to make a lot of changes, then fit you again.”

You step down from the podium, going towards your dressing room without a second thought until Chaeyoung calls for you. “Y/N? Do you want to have lunch later? In your trailer or something?”

“Sure,” you answer, barely glancing back. When you do, all you see is her with shiny puppy eyes, and in her giant gown, it’s eerily similar to the role she’s supposed to be playing.

“It’s nice. You’ve decorated it?”

You nod absentmindedly, clearing the narrow couch off for yourself to sit on, since Chaeyoung has taken the only chair that could fit in the trailer. “Yeah. I mean, I’ve had it for a few months, so.”

She winces. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” you frown. Chaeyoung apologizes too much, but at least she’s upfront about whatever she has to say.

Your costar sighs, “For usurping the role? You must’ve gotten attached to Sooyoung, and it’s got to be horrible for me to just… arrive like this.”

“You know… that’s part of it.” You can’t lie; a big part of the resentment you hold against Chaeyoung is the fact that she took a role meant for someone else, someone you were friends with. “The other thing… I don’t like idol actresses,” you tell her.

Chaeyoung’s brows furrow, and she leans forward. “Why? I mean, why don’t you?”

You pause to think about it. “Well… I mean, think about it like this. Sooyoung and my auditions went for weeks before we were chosen, as a pair. Didn’t you get this role because you were an idol? You had to audition, sure, but I bet you just flashed a few smiles and read the script and got chosen. How is that fair?”

She opens her mouth to speak, but you hold your hand up and continue, “And the other thing. You’re straight.”

Chaeyoung chokes on air at that, spluttering, “What? You hate me because I’m straight?”

“No,” you say incredulously, “Well, I don’t hate you. But you being straight, and landing the lead role in a film like this… you’re taking away representation. And that’s kind of shitty of you.”

The air inside the trailer becomes suffocating, and Chaeyoung’s fiddling with the jacket in her lap finally stops when she throws it aside and stands up. She sounds like she’s about to cry when she says quietly, “Have you ever considered that I’m not straight? It’s not… it’s not that easy to be out about it--”

“Oh, cry me a river,” you groan. “Look, I apologize for assuming, but if you want to act in lesbian roles, you can’t pretend to be straight. It’s all for your fans, isn’t it? Another part of being an idol--”

She stands up, then storms right out of the trailer without another word, the door banging closed. The only thing you can do in response is sigh and utter a quiet, “Shit”.

Perhaps it’s just your luck that the first proper scene you have to film with Chaeyoung is your culminating kiss scene.

It shouldn’t be in the trailer at all-- according to the scene schedule, the two of you would’ve filmed your scenes together in chronological order, and the kiss would’ve been at the end, hopefully after a reconciliation between the two of you. However, for some inexplicable reason, it’s going to be the first one you do, without a single second of rehearsal.

You’re a one-take wonder, and you always have been, but you can’t help but think about how impossible it’s going to be to pull off such an intense scene with someone you just fought with. Sighing, you lean over to fiddle with your hair; it’s slightly tangled now, and there’s a fake scrape on the side of your cheek. 

At a side, Chaeyoung is similarly beat up, fake blood smeared on the left side of her face. Her long hair has been put in an updo and then taken down, and parts of her dress are ripped; to you, she looks more like Helen than herself now.

“Okay, everyone, are we ready? Positions, please!”

You arrange yourself on the ground where you should be, holding a handkerchief to your cheek like instructed as Chaeyoung stands by the camera to run to you. Exhaling sharply, your eyes meet hers for the first time in days. “Action!”

Chaeyoung sprints to you as soon as she’s cued, falling in front of you in a heap. “Luna,” she gasps, reaching a gloved hand out to the ‘injured’ half of your face.

“I’m fine,” you smile weakly. The camera hovers by Chaeyoung’s shoulder, and you soften your gaze as much as possible as your hand comes up to hers.

The other girl only moves closer, her eyes scanning yours and her dress surrounding the both of you like a sea of gauze. Her nose is almost brushing up against yours, and you mutter softly, “Be careful. I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want.”

“Well, what do you want?” Chaeyoung implores, almost inaudible. Her breath quivers, and you feel it when you reach forward to cup her jaw. “Luna, what do you want right now?”

“I’m not making a move until you tell me to,” you shake your head. 

The blonde’s hands slip off your face, and she braces herself on your thighs instead. She laughs breathily, “Coward.”

“Your coward, huh?”

Chaeyoung pauses, scraping her teeth across her bottom lip. It’s so quiet that you think you could hear a pin drop, and the torches held up by the crew flicker across her face so naturally. “If you want to be.”

There’s probably another line that comes after, but with Chaeyoung so close to you, it swims blurrily in your mind. So instead, you just lean up, pull her down, and connect your lips.

She plays along, thankfully, stumbling slightly in her character’s eagerness to get a little closer. The only thing you can hear is Chaeyoung’s slight gasp when you let your hands wander down to her waist, and it’s almost scary how absorbed you are in the scene.

“Okay, cut!” Seulgi’s shout breaks you from your trance, and you hold your hands up as if in surrounder. Chaeyoung’s cheeks are red yet again when she sits up, staring anywhere other than you.

Your director hops off her chair to run towards you, a huge grin on her face. “That was perfect,” she shouts. “Y/N, I think you forgot a line? But it worked out amazingly. The one-take wonder, right?”

You grin when she pats you on the shoulder, a little harder than necessary. Apparently, all your worries were for nothing, as you and Chaeyoung stand to monitor your own shot in the screen next to Joohyun.

You can’t even hear all the praise she showers on the two of you, and you pay no attention to all the details she points out that apparently showcase your perfect chemistry with your costar. All you feel is a slight squeeze on your hand, hidden in the mess of fabric by your side.

You jolt awake at the sound of your phone ringing loudly by your side, finding an unknown number as the caller ID. Accepting hesitantly, you greet, “Hello?”

“Y/N? Did Chan give me the right number?”

Oh. It’s Chaeyoung. “Yeah.” You clear your throat in an attempt to sound a little less drowsy, then repeat, “Right number. Why’d you ask Chan?”

“Well, it’s kinda hard to find you when you never accepted my request,” she laughs quietly. “Um, I have to record the OST today, and I was wondering whether you’d want to come watch? Chan said you didn’t really have any scenes later today.”

“Um. Okay. I’ll ask Chan to bring me,” you answer, then hang up. Your head swims slightly, partially due to the fact that you woke up to the piercing sound of your ringtone and partially because you just don’t understand why Chaeyoung’s reaching out again. You should be the one apologizing, after the tangent you went off on, and you highly doubt that your kiss scene doubled as an apology. Of course, you’ll take it.

Your manager is more than pleased to pick you up this time, but thankfully, he doesn’t question you. If he did, he’d probably be the one you shouted at.

The studio is honestly too small for two people, probably hastily set up, but you recognize the recording equipment from a video of Chaeyoung recording one of her group’s songs. And you recognize the girl already standing in the recording booth, waving you over. “Hi,” she smiles, and for all you try, you don’t see a hint of malice.

“Hey,” you mumble, taking a seat. “Uh… I’m sorry.”

“Wow, straightforward,” she tries to joke. “What for?”

You scratch the back of your neck, sighing, “For assuming, for blowing up on you, for… I don’t know, kind of everything. I’m an asshole, even if what I said wasn’t wrong.”

Chaeyoung chuckles, fiddling with the mic. “I mean, I appreciate the apology, but I wasn’t great either. You definitely had some truth behind what you said, even if it was kind of too to the point.”

“I know. You were just trying to apologize and help us become civil, and I kind of ruined it,” you hum. The other girl adjusts the lyric stand as you continue, “But I’m hoping you understand why I had to say what I did?”

“I do,” she agrees. “You’re definitely right that it’s not good representation at all, I just wish you had heard me out.”

You nod uncomfortably, changing the way you sit on the couch just to distract yourself. “So… you’re gay? I’m just asking because I don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk about it, and I’ve seen plenty of your interviews.”

“So you watch my interviews?” Chaeyoung teases. When you scowl, she just smiles, “I can’t say specifically, but I am confused. You said last time that it’s just another part of being an idol, and you’re… you’re right. It’s taboo for idols to be gay, even though Korea’s opening up to it a bit more now. So even though I want to, I don’t think I can ever be out about it.”

“I understand. And I’m sorry,” you say quietly.

She swallows, throat bobbing. “Thank you. Hey, Y/N… would you mind singing with me?”

“What?” You stare up at her incredulously; it’s not like your singing would make the other girl faint on the spot, but you definitely don’t possess an angelic voice like hers, either.

But maybe it’s an olive branch. “Just… can you match this note?” She hums, and you attempt to create the same pitch. “Okay. Can you do the chorus part in that key, while I do it in the main one? We’ll sound better like that,” Chaeyoung offers.

Against your better judgement, you stand, and shuffle into the recording booth next to her. “If this sounds bad, you’re taking the blame,”  you warn, and she giggles while twisting the stand so you can see.

You do sound good together, maybe to a level that you would’ve never anticipated.

You know that something’s off when Chan doesn’t wake you up bright and early on your birthday, even if Seulgi already promised that you wouldn’t have to go to work on the day of. After spending many a birthday with him, you’ve already gotten used to him tugging you up just to take you outside and celebrate somehow.

You know something’s especially off when you hear a female voice cursing from your kitchen, and smell something burning.

“Who the shit-- Chaeyoung?”

The girl turns in surprise, caught red-handed with a piece of burnt toast pinched between her fingers. “Um. Hi?” she offers weakly.

Suddenly self-conscious, you cross your arms over the faded sweatshirt you wear. In your own apartment, Chaeyoung is leagues more put-together in the summery dress she wears, her dyed hair tossed in a braid and glitter shining at the corners of her eyes. “Hello?”

“Chan said you wouldn’t be awake for a few hours,” she sighs, shaking her head as she tosses the toast in the trash. “And I wasn’t supposed to burn the toast.”

“What were you supposed to do?” you question, stepping closer. There’s a cake box on the counter, as well as a couple suspicious tubes of icing right by it, and you think you know what’s going on.

Chaeyoung huffs out an exasperated breath. “I was supposed to surprise you. Chan has something going on at home, so he sent me to supervise your birthday instead. Obviously, I messed that up.”

“It’s fine,” you shrug, taking a seat at the counter and reaching for the icing. “I’ve always wanted to decorate a cake anyway.”

She looks surprised at that, but a smile breaks out across her face. “Really?”

“Really,” you confirm. It’s partially a lie, but you’re decently sure that Chaeyoung will refuse to let you do most of the work anyways. “Uh. I’ll just change first, and then we can get that going?”

“Yeah,” she grins, and you take it as your cue to scurry off to the bedroom.

By the time you come back, there’s a plate of not-burnt toast on your counter, and Chaeyoung’s pouring out two glasses of the juice that you can never bring yourself to buy because of the price tag. “I hope you like it, this is one of my favorites.”

“Like it? I love this,” you gasp, surging forward to pick up one of the glasses. “It’s expensive as hell, though.”

“Well, I couldn’t get you a gift, so I thought a nice morning would suffice,” Chaeyoung laughs. She unties the bow on the cake box to reveal a completely bare vanilla cake, a few packets of sprinkles that you hadn’t noticed now lying next to it. “Do you want to start?”

“Oh, sure.” You choose the blue icing after a bit of debating, and pick up the spatula that your costar offers you. “You didn’t have to, though, I would’ve been okay on my own today.”

Chaeyoung shrugs, “I mean, I didn’t have anything else to do, and I wouldn’t like to be alone on my birthday.”

“How do you usually celebrate?” you question, glancing up at her.

She pauses to think, then answers, “Well, I do live with my members, so we’ll get something to eat. Sometimes, we’re on vacation, so we just do what we can, but I like staying in the dorm to receive the things that their families send me.”

“It sounds sweet.”

“It is,” she grins. “I honestly don’t know what I would do on my own, it seems lonely-- Oh. I’m sorry.”

“What for? It is kind of lonely,” you admit, squeezing a glob of icing out. It’s definitely not as graceful as you would’ve appreciated, and you catch Chaeyoung stifling a laugh. “Chan lived with me at the beginning, but he eventually moved out when I got a girlfriend. Obviously, that didn’t laugh.”

“Sorry,” the other girl repeats again, and you wave a hand out. “When was that?”

“She moved out two years ago,” you answer. “And I’ve been alone since. Or, lonely, not always alone.”

Chaeyoung nods just so that you know she heard you. She accepts the icing tube when you hand it to her, making a spiral that’s infuriatingly better than yours. “How about you? I know you said you aren’t out, but have you dated yet?” you question.

She shakes her head, admitting, “Not yet. I don’t really know how to, you know? You assumed I was straight when you first saw me, so I think everyone else does too.”

“Sorry,” you say, an echo of her.

Your costar doesn’t respond, only setting the spatula down once the basic blue icing is smooth. “I think we’re supposed to refrigerate this before decorating, right?”

You grimace. “Well, I don’t know. I stopped watching cake videos years ago, so I’ll just listen to you.”

Chaeyoung hums and ties the box back up. “Okay, then I’ll just do it. Um, do you mind ordering chicken or something while we wait?”

“Sure.” Reaching for your phone, you ask, “Would you be opposed to romcoms?”

“I’m never opposed to romcoms,” the other girl answers.

You have to remind yourself to order two servings of chicken, something that you haven’t done in a while. But it’s comforting, in a way, to not be alone again.

“Can you believe we’ve only got a week left of filming? I feel like I haven’t seen you at all.”

You wince guiltily, even though you know that Yerim doesn’t mean it. Acting with your friend was originally a huge incentive for you to accept the film’s role, but the two of you quickly discovered that you had almost no scenes together, and with your push-and-pull with Chaeyoung, you forgot all about it. “Sorry, Yerim.”

She makes an incredulous expression, swatting your arm. “Don’t be ridiculous, Y/N. I’m happy you’re pursuing love and all that, and besides, we’ll have plenty of opportunities to act together.”

Blinking, you set your cup down on the counter. “Pursuing love?”

Yerim raises her eyebrow and says, “Yeah. Aren’t you and Chaeyoung together yet? We’ve been filming for two months, I’ll be shocked if you still haven't kissed and made up.”

“Uh. Well, we’ve kissed, but I don’t think it counted,” you frown. 

Your friend sighs and rolls her eyes. She’s all too used to how dense you are, and apparently, she’s finally gotten tired of it. “You’re an idiot. You literally met the morning of your first script reading, and you knew each other for… what, a week before you had your kiss scene? There’s got to be something there.”

“No.”

Right on cue, a few of the other cast members arrive, Chaeyoung sandwiched between them. “Have you seen the articles?” Nayeon grins, waving her phone around in the air. She’s drunk, obviously, but you have to indulge her.

“Which articles?”

She shoves the screen in your face as an answer, and you cringe when you find a screencap of you and Chaeyoung. “You won’t believe the chemistry-- nope, I’m not reading that.” You hand the phone back to Nayeon, then press it in her hand when she doesn’t take it. Yerim sends you a knowing expression, one that you definitely don’t like.

“Aw, come on! It’s good press,” Nayeon whines. “And a great kiss scene.”

“Don’t be weird,” Chaeyoung warns. She doesn’t seem to be drunk at all, though she does look fantastic in the silver dress that she wears. Your eyes linger on her for an embarrassing amount of time.

Nayeon pouts. She’s bubbly-- you’ve learned that much through acting alongside her in a total of three productions so far. You note that your costar doesn’t seem to be so accustomed to her temperament yet. “You’re no fun, Chaeng. We all know you enjoyed it.”

She goes bright pink at that amidst Yerim’s joking coos. “The token straight, converted?” your friend gasps, and you elbow her to stop her from going too far.

Apparently, it already has. “I didn’t!” Chaeyoung defends herself.

“Prove it,” Nayeon demands, slipping when she attempts to lean on the counter next to you.

Chaeyoung goes silent at that, apparently unable to find a way to ‘prove it’. You finally sigh, “Okay, I think that’s enough teas--”

If it wasn’t for the fact that you’ve long since memorized your entire script book, you would almost think that Chaeyoung reaching forward to tug on the front of your shirt is a scene between your two characters. After all, it’s perfectly in character for your eyes to widen comically as the other girl kisses you right on the lips. 

It’s also in character for Nayeon to start whooping next to you when your hands wrap around Chaeyoung’s waist to pull her in closer. You part at the noise. “You certainly look like you liked it,” Nayeon grins. 

“Yeah, get a room,” Yerim follows, and you shove her.

“You know what? Maybe we will.” Ignoring your friends’ jeering, you grab Chaeyoung’s wrist and lead her down the hallway, though not to a bedroom like you joked you would. “Hey. You okay? I didn’t know if that teasing crossed a line,” you whisper worriedly.

She bites down on her lip, but instead of answering you, Chaeyoung tilts your face up and leans closer, only stopped by your hand on her wrist. “Chae…”

“I’m sorry, this… this isn’t what you want, is it?” She steps back, mouth already opening to apologize, but you stop her from leaving you alone in the hallway.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” With the flashing neon lights echoing in her eyes, you can’t tell what Chaeyoung’s feeling, and you can’t tell if she’s willing to answer you properly at all. “I’m not making a move until you tell me to.”

Still, you don’t hear her say a word, until your grip starts to loosen on her wrist. “Did you drive here yourself?” she finally asks, barely audible. You nod hesitantly, and Chaeyoung’s voice grows firmer when she says, “I’m telling you to make a move.”

“I thought you were questioning?”

She swallows hard and takes your hand. “Not anymore.”

You don’t taste any alcohol when you lick your lower lip, and so, you nod. It’s stupid, especially considering how quickly your time together is about to end.

But for once, you know what you want.

“Good luck out there, Chae,” you smile, arms wrapped around the girl’s waist. 

“Thanks,” she hums, adjusting her hair yet again in the mirror. “We’re almost done filming, I have to promote us well so that we have enough money to at least put the damn film out.”

“Mm.” Your thumb smooths over the sliver of skin exposed by her top, and you place your chin on her shoulder to look at the two of you together.

She glances down at you. “What? Are you thinking about something?”

“Sort of,” you shrug. “I just can’t believe we’re almost done, but we… we just started this. You know, this thing between us.”

“Yeah, it’s definitely a thing. But it doesn’t have to stop with filming,” Chaeyoung says offhandedly.

Raising an eyebrow, you question, “Doesn’t it? It’s going to be suspicious for us to constantly be seen together after filming together, I’ve seen the way your fans behave. Especially while you’re not out.”

“I think I can negotiate that with my company,” the other girl shakes her head.

You joke, “What, you release another two albums if you get to come out about having a girlfriend?”

“Do you want to be my girlfriend?” Chaeyoung responds immediately. Her ears pink endearingly, and you wait for her to clarify, “In secret for now, obviously. But… one day, I’ll be out about it. I promise.”

“Don’t make empty promises, okay?” You press a kiss to her bare shoulder and let her go when you hear a knock at the dressing room door. “Do good!”

“Alright, Chaeyoung, it’s about time that we ask you some questions about your upcoming film, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, absolutely,” your costar smiles, and you raise your head from your phone to watch the screen. She’s sitting cross-legged across from some of the most famous idol interviewers in Korea, absolutely poised and natural even in front of the crowd that cheers over the interview.

The woman behind the podium clears her throat. “A huge talking point in Korea right now is your chemistry with your costar, Y/N. How exactly do you pull that off, since you’ve never experienced a relation like that?”

Chaeyoung laughs nervously, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Oh. Well, um, I don’t have much experience with relationships at all, so--”

“Really? A pretty girl like you must have had a boyfriend or two before.” You despise the way that the interviewer leans in conspiratorially, as if the prying questions weren’t completely scripted. “But you seem a little to pretty to have experienced that, am I right?”

The crowd laughs with her, but Chaeyoung glances behind the scenes, probably to where her own staff sits. “You know, you can tell me if you ever felt… uncomfortable during filming,” the interviewer continues on. “Y/N has been out for years, hasn’t she?”

“Oh, she has…” You’re practically fuming, but you also can’t seem to pry your eyes away from the screen. All of Chaeyoung’s practiced idol-charm has seemed to dissipate into thin air, and she’s practically blending into the wall as she sits there.

The Chaeyoung you know-- no, the Chaeyoung that you’ve come to know, wouldn’t stand to hear something like that. You’ve watched her argue with a scriptwriter, and you’ve watched him get fired because he said something incredibly offensive, even though it wasn’t about you. But here, she sits still and just listens to the interviewer discuss you behind your back, and she says nothing about all the disgustingly backhanded comments.

The thing is, you don’t care about Chaeyoung not being out. You were closeted for enough time yourself, and you know how hard it is, so you’d never wish it on her; but watching her completely let go of all her personal principles just for a stupid interview is just another reminder that you’re letting go of your own. Chaeyoung won’t ever speak up, you realize, because her career comes before anything else. And you can’t stand for that.

“I’m leaving,” you tell the guard standing outside of your door. Only increasing your anger, tears start to burn in your eyes, and you scrape your sleeve across your face as roughly as you can. Chan picks up on one dial, and you say furiously, “Pick me up. It’s over.” In more ways than one.

Chaeyoung shivers at the top of the hill, where she’s supposed to be filming her closing scene with you. She hasn’t seen you for the past week, and after how disastrous her interview was, she’s pretty sure she knows why.

“Where’s Y/N?” she finally asks her makeup artist, giving in to her own curiosity.

Felix shrugs, reaching to mess with the blood on her hairline. “I have no idea, honestly, I haven’t seen her yet. She’s never late, though, you don’t have to worry. You’ll get your scene done.”

“That’s…” Chaeyoung sighs. That’s why she should be worried. “Right.”

“Okay, can we start?” Seulgi shouts. It’s started to rain, but with the excited look on the director’s face, Chaeyoung figures that it suits the scene even better than the gray clouds that had been planned. “Great. Chaeyoung, Y/N!”

Your hair is plastered to your forehead with the rain, and water makes your blouse cling to your curves; with the grim expression on your face, Chaeyoung could easily just mistake you for your character. “Hi,” you mutter, taking a seat on the grass right next to your costar. You say nothing else.

When cued, Chaeyoung takes a deep breath before her line. “Luna. I love you.”

For a second, Chaeyoung thinks you won’t respond, but the rasp to your voice proves her wrong. “No. No, you don’t.”

“I think I’m the one who should be deciding that, don’t you?” The blonde raises her eyebrows, reaching forward hesitantly for your shoulder.

Of course, you dodge it. Blinking the rain out of your eyes, you’re resigned when you ask, “You have your birthday gala tonight, don’t you?”

“Yes, but--” Chaeyoung swallows, lets her hand make contact, then continues, “I’m spending as much time as I can with you, aren’t I with you right now?”

“But you’re going.” It feels like you’re staring right into Chaeyoung’s soul when you speak, as despondent as your voice is. She nods, and you stand, her hand slipping off of your shoulder and into her lap. “Then go. You’re still a princess at the end of the day, aren’t you?”

“At the end of the day, yes…”

“You can’t do that. You sneak out onto my ships, get my people to love you and protect you, and then turn right back to your family to stay safe while we die for you. You can’t say you support our cause and then go back on it when it’s inconvenient for you, it doesn’t work like that!” Chaeyoung flinches at how intense you sound; at this point, she barely knows if it’s still acting. She can only hear her own heart in her ears, can only see your chest heaving from how quickly you spoke, and it all feels too real.

“What, do you want me to get found out?” Chaeyoung demands, getting to her feet as well. The rain becomes harsher, angled so that it perfectly blurs her vision of you. “I’ve saved your ass just as many times too, don’t pretend like I’m not a valuable part of your ship!”

“You’re still pretending.” Realizing that it’s not the right line, Chaeyoung opens her mouth to stop you, but your voice chills her into silence when you speak again. “You’ll always pretend, as long as it benefits you, won’t you? You can’t do that, Helen, not if you ‘love me’. Putting a crown on your head doesn’t mean that you’re a princess. Until you realize that, and until you’re willing to embrace it, you don’t love me. and I don’t love you.”

None of it is the script. None of it is the scene that you rehearsed a thousand times together in your trailer, but somehow, it makes Chaeyoung’s heart quaver in her throat so much more than the original lines ever did.

And when you drop your gaze to the ground, turning to walk off into the rain alone, she knows that to you, your entire relationship is already done.

[luvlyrv]

Uncover | Seulgi x F!Reader

Genre/warnings: fluff, angst, homophobia (religious)

Summary: You quickly learn that while it was easy to be dishonest with yourself, it was nearly impossible to lie to Seulgi.

Word Count: 4.7k A/N: This has been something wracking up in my brain since June. It's kind of embarrassing that it's taken this long but it's a lovechild of my emotions. Enjoy, and I hope you feel things.

Date: 9/21/21

You can't imagine a day without her, because she's always been there. Right from the day you could remember. You bet that she could be your last memory too.

Your first memory has you sitting in the living room playing with your toys as you anxiously eye the other child in the room. Some strangers had rung your doorbell and your mom and dad had welcomed them into the house. Now they were in the kitchen, their voices blending into each other in the background.

The small girl in front of you decided to take the liberty of picking up your toys and playing with them. She ran around playing in the imaginary world in her head. You think that she's having fun and that you want to have fun too, but you can't seem to move from your position. As you slowly try to build up the courage to talk to her she approaches you.

She had been glancing at you from the corner of her eyes too. She watched your shy self idly playing all alone. She found it hard to approach you, scared of you pushing her away or being mean, but she thought maybe it was worth it. You could be a friend.

"Hi!" The strange girl is right in front of you with one of your stuffed toys in hand. "Do you want to play with me? I'm Seulgi!"

"I'm Y/N…"

For the rest of the hour the two of you chased each other in a shared adventure. Enraptured in your own little wonderland until your parents had to pull you apart.

Soon it became a ritual for those strangers, who you later learned to be Mr. and Mrs. Kang, to visit your house. Along them was always their daughter Seulgi, who wouldn't hesitate to pull you into a large hug right before starting a new adventure with you.

You slightly trail behind your best friend. You smile at yourself from the sight of Seulgi happily skipping, somehow filled with even more vigor than she usually has. She's always been filled with much more energy than you, amazed by even the smallest of things. You suppose something truly spectacular must be happening today for her to feel so extra. She turns her head over to look at you, flashing you her perfect smile with her perfect cheeks. The ones you always want to squish when you remind her of how cute she is.

She continues to bounce but slows down to be by your side. One of the favorite parts of your day, and hopefully hers too, would be the peaceful walk the two of you would always share before and after school. It always reminded you of how close you are. How you can always rely on her to listen and to brighten up your day.

She bites her lip while still smiling. She must be thinking about something.

"What's got you so excited today?" You ask her with a giggle.

"Guess!" She pesters leaning into you. A familiar feeling emerges in your chest from the contact.

"You know I'm really bad at guessing…"

"Well why can't you try?"

"All I know is that it has to be something really special, right?" You decide to lean back and push her a little as a tease.

"It is! Mom and dad bought me my favorite ice cream that we can share later today!"

You laugh at her as she continues giving her dumb smile. Seulgi moves in front of you with her eyebrows raised, waiting to hear your opinion about the news.

"Is that it?" You ask still laughing. She pouts a little.

"What do you mean 'is that it'? It's my favorite! And I get to share it with you!" With that you pull Seulgi in for a side hug.

"I'm kidding, I'm excited too."

You enjoy listening to whatever nonsense Seulgi thinks about and decides to spill to you as you guys continue walking. You feel a bit disheartened at the sight of the school building, but looking at Seulgi again is enough to make the disappointment go away.

As much as you wish it did, your schedule wasn't entirely with your best friend. Instead you had to split up as you entered the school grounds to your different classes. Fortunately you shared at least some classes with her, and most importantly lunch. So when you sit down at your desk with nobody talking to you, you don't feel too lonely. The anticipation of being reunited with Seulgi was enough for you.

As usual Seulgi finds your figure sitting down at a lunch table and immediately rushes towards you. She taps your shoulder as she sits down, hurriedly opening up her lunch box, her beastly appetite striking again.

"Oooh." She oogles as the both of you breathe in the sudden aroma of homemade food. You peer over to look at the contents of her lunch box. You swore that you can see the steam coming off of her rice.

"Open up!" Seulgi playfully demands of you. You oblige as she not so carefully throws a grape your way. It would've been lost if you didn't move your head to make up for the completely inaccurate trajectory.

"How are you still bad at this?" You ask her after chewing.

"Maybe I just like to see you work for your food." You laugh at her response as you carefully pick up a spring roll from your box and place it in hers.

"Mom fried it this morning so you better enjoy."

You enjoy the long-time tradition of sharing food and eating in relative silence. That time was short lived though as a small group of girls joined your table. You didn't mind them much, you'd even consider them casual friends. At the same time though, they were bothering you.

You found it strange that despite finally being with Seulgi you felt so lonely. So lost.

Seulgi's popular, you know that. A lot of people try to befriend her and fight for her attention. Being the social butterfly she is she never hesitated to say hello back and return the friendliness. By proxy you met a lot of nice people, a lot of not so nice people, and more. They never really stuck by for you though. They stayed for Seulgi.

You wish you understood why you were so bothered by those that stayed. Why you were always feeling jealous recently. You wonder if it's natural to feel so intensely sick when you watch your best friend's attention be pulled away by several different girls at a time, or laugh at a guys joke. Well, maybe you do know why.

You quietly sigh and push the thought away, instead trying to join in the chatter and laugh with everyone at the table. Just as you were about to calm down and ease into the group a sudden large group of guys and girls approach. One boy in particular seems to be leading the pack. You purse your lips as you silently watch them come over. Seulgi absent-mindedly continues talking, completely unaware of what was about to occur.

You tighten your hands into a ball as a feeling bubbles inside you. You can't place what it is. Is it fear? Anger? Jealously? It's probably both.

The boy also tightens his hands as they grip onto his shirt. You watch him bite his lip and see how a red color crawls up his neck and reaches the tips of his ears. You hold in a breath as he finally arrives at the table and Seulgi looks up at him.

"S-Seulgi." He barely manages to say her name aloud.

"Huh?" She looks at him cluelessly but gives him her full attention anyways.

"I like you! A lot! So if you can, please go out with me!" The boy's words spill out, as if his mouth was a floodgate holding them back. He reaches behinds him and quickly bends over to give Seulgi a piece of red paper, shaped like a heart. He probably wrote about his feelings extensively on it.

Your eyes had been focused on the love-stricken boy. It's hard for you to move your eyes towards Seulgi. You realize now what you're feeling. You fear what you'll see when you look over at Seulgi to see her reaction.

You notice that she's red too, the color slowly blossoming across her cheeks.

Why does this hurt you?

"Erm, ah, thank you." She says out of politeness and bows back. She gives him a smile and that seems to excite him. "I'll think about your confession."

He eagerly nods his head and leaves the table, happy with the results of his actions. The crowd around him seem to think that was a good ending and started whispering and congratulating him. You look back at your table and the girls are murmuring too.

"He's cute, you should definitely go for him!"

"I heard he treated his last girlfriend nicely. They're still on good terms."

"I've never seen you date before. Isn't now your time to explore?"

Seulgi just takes it all in and nods along with what they say. Your head hangs low as you pick at your food. You don't dare look up. You're scared of seeing Seulgi's face again. You're scared that tears will start falling.

It was like the weight of the world had fallen on your chest.

When the bell dismisses you from lunch you quickly go to your next class. You don't say goodbye to Seulgi or any of the other girls. You feel the light graze of Seulgi's fingertips as she tries to stop you, but you're too fast.

The rest of the school day is you trying to focus on studying, and when your last class finishes you're not sure what you'll do. Everybody leaves the classroom before you as you take some time for yourself. Breathing in and out, you mentally prepare yourself to face Seulgi, as if she was some type of monster.

As you exit the building and get near the gates you see a swarm of people with Seulgi in the center. They're probably there to ask about how she feels about the confession that happened. You sigh and almost contemplate leaving without her, but her eyes quickly find yours. Seulgi politely but abruptly says her goodbyes and runs towards you.

As Seulgi's figure grows nearer there's a feeling of satisfaction. It was like you had won some petty fight, and that feeling was able to erase the fear and nerves you had earlier. A smile grows on your face she reaches your side, your bodies automatically matching your steps. You enjoy the warmth when she locks her arm with yours. Not knowing what to say, you let silence fill the space in between the two of you until Seulgi decided to break it.

"So, do you wanna stay at my place for a bit so we can eat that ice cream?"

Seulgi's keys jingle as she unlocks her front door. You follow in after her, putting your shoes away as she dashes towards her refrigerator to retrieve the ice cream from the freezer. You walk up towards her as she hands one to you. Naturally, both of you make your way outside into her backyard.

Her backyard is quaint, housing a nice garden that her mother often tends and one large tree. The two of you rest under it, appreciating the winding arms of the apple tree that has always given you and Seulgi refuge. You enjoy the taste of the ice cream, perhaps the shade was enhancing its flavor. Either way you understood why its Seulgi's favorite. The refreshing taste and Seulgi's presence puts a smile on your face. You feel yourself opening up again as you guys joke and talk about your day in between bites and licks. By the time you finish eating your ice cream she had managed to convince you that she needed your extra help in math. As always you agreed to tutor her.

She argues that you should stay underneath the tree as she gets up to throw away the trash. You watch as she goes back inside the house, coming out again with a shiny apple in hand that was picked only a couple days ago. You laugh a little as you ask,

"Still hungry?"

"Enough for a little snack."

She sits by you and takes a rest on your lap. You brush her hair away as you look into her eyes. You can tell she's thinking about something.

"What's wrong?" You ask her.

"Well, I was just wondering, why were you upset earlier?" She says in a serious tone.

"Huh?"

"You didn't even say goodbye at lunch, and don't pretend I didn't notice you almost leaving without me." There's a hint of hurt in her voice. You feel bad for not keeping your emotions in check better, that you threw a fit over something so small.

"Well," Your voice trails off as your mind struggles to think of a response, "what does that boy mean to you?" You decide to ask.

"Oh so now you want to know about that too?" There's only a slight annoyance in her voice as she gives you an eyeroll.

"I'm your best friend, of course I'm curious." Seulgi huffs at your response. She can't blame you for wondering so she takes a moment to think before answering honestly.

"I mean, I guess they weren't wrong. He's kinda cute, and I know it took a lot for him to say that to me. I admire him for it." She said it in a casual manner, as if it wasn't a big deal. Yet for you it meant everything. And it hurt.

You can't control the frown that found its way on your face.

"Hey…" Seulgi quickly gets up from your lap. She has a confused expression as her eyes scans yours. "Hey, what's wrong?" Her voice is soft as she puts a hand on your shoulder.

Your chest is about to explode.

"Do you like him or something?" She continues to grip onto your shoulder with a confused face. She thinks she was the one who did something wrong. That she's stealing someone away from you, but that was so different from the truth.

"No, Seulgi, I-" You pause to think about what you're going to say. Something was about to come out instinctively, and you don't know whether or not that was the best decision.

"You what?"

She presses you for an answer but you're still thinking. You're thinking about you know you can't handle her possibly being close to someone else. To share all of her laughs with that boy. To smile at him and spend time with him. To do all the things that exists between you and her. Living would feel wrong if you were no longer the one she ran to and spilled her secrets to.

Who are you if not Seulgi's biggest and only confidant? The only one who could soothe her in her darkest moments? The one who understands every feeling and thought just by the way she blinks?

You're intimately familiar with the feeling in your chest now. You think that you know what it is too, but that doesn't make you hate it any less. If you could, you'd sacrifice every fiber of your being to forget that feeling and throw it away. To pretend it doesn't exist. But your wishes don't make it go away.

You can be dishonest with yourself, but it's impossible to lie to Seulgi. Not when she looks at you like that.

"I like you."

The words are barely a whisper but she hears. Seulgi's hand falls off your shoulder and you want to cry again. You said the wrong thing. She was going to think you're disgusting. She would never go on a walk with you again. You'll never smell her perfume again. You'll never hear her laughter again. She'd never touch you again. Never speak to you again.

Her mouth is open slack. Your eyes water and you breathe in, readying yourself to apologize profusely. To rescind the blasphemous words that slipped out of your foul mouth.

"I'm so sorry. Just ignore it. I take it back. I think I'm sick or something, you know, delirious. Just ignore it please. Please." Tears begins to fall down your face as Seulgi seemingly snaps back to reality. She reaches towards you, taking your face in her hands as her thumbs swipe away the tears.

"Oh my god, no, don't cry." She begs you to stop, but you can't.

"I-I'm, I'm sorry." The tears continue to make their way down your face. A horrible sickness wells in your stomach and suddenly it feels below freezing as you shake uncontrollably.

"No, don't be." She hugs you tight and whispers in your ear. "I like you too. So stop crying. For me, please." She strokes your back as you cry, hoping that the touch could settle you down.

It takes a while for you to register what she says, but as soon as you do your body seizes up. You think that maybe your everything, your soul, has shattered into a million pieces from Seulgi's words. How in the world could it be true? It couldn't be, not in this universe, not in this timeline.

Yet it was.

When Seulgi hears your sniffling stop and your body letting go of its tension she separates her body from yours. Her eyes are all you can see, and all you can see in them is pain.

"I'm sorry for making you worried." You felt guilty that she had to see you cry. The outburst at school wasn't great either.

"Don't worry about it" She reassures you by taking a hand in hers, stroking it with her delicate fingers to show you her affection. For several moments you allow yourself to breathe. Seulgi also took the time to process everything, and the two of you stared at each other with the new understanding of your feelings. Time seems to pass so slowly when you observe each other with care.

"Seulgi…" You mumble when what felt like years passed. She understood what you meant when she saw the way you looked at her lips.

In that moment you couldn't care anymore. Neither could Seulgi, it seemed, as you pressed your lips on hers and she pressed back. Greedily, the two of you dived in for a taste. Your lips on hers, her tongue in your mouth, it was something you needed. It was a flavor you could relish forever, perhaps this is what sin tasted like. Yes, this is what they'd call it. A sin.

It feels like everything has changed, but at the same time it hasn't. You still spend every second possible with Seulgi. You spend your time doing the same things. Yet everything feels so different, it feels brand new. Magically, it feels better than before. Is this the power that Seulgi has over you?

Nobody knows, nobody needs to know. After all, you're still Seulgi's bestfriend. Is there really anything different? Maybe just the tighter hugs, the kisses, and the alluring smiles, but that's all. Life is easy this way.

After bidding Seulgi goodbye in front of her house you go home to eat dinner with your family. You come home and greet your parents with a smile as you rush to join them at the dinner table. They share that smile as they take note of your enthusiasm recently. As you eat quietly for a while your mom finally asks you what's been going on to make you shine so much.

"Well..." You debate on what to say. It's been over a month since you confessed to Seulgi but you were still feeling high. You've been holding it for so long you wished you could tell someone. Why not them? You want them to be happy with you too. "I've been dating Seulgi."

"Hm?" Your mom asks you somewhat aggressively for clarification. The sudden stillness in the air alarms you. You look up from your food to see your mom staring as your dad stops eating.

"I-I told her I liked her and she liked me back." You say hoping to clear whatever confusion was occuring. Yet the look on your parents didn't fade.

"What happened?" You father's question sounds more like a statement as he sternly places his utensils down.

"What do you mean what happened? I just told you."

"What happened to make you like this?" His cold voices breaks a little as you notice his eyes tearing up. Was he seriously upset about this?

"You're joking, right?" Your mom joins in with an angry tone.

"Of course I'm not. Mom, she makes me really happy." You struggle to keep yourself composed under the scrutiny of both of your parents.

"Y/N. You are not happy. You're messing with the devil right now and he's fucking up your mind."

"Have you not been doing your prayers?"

You can barely fight for yourself at the dinner table. Your parents argue with and over you, about the causes and the whys. About the signs and what happens next. You cry as you watch your decision unfold into your nightmare.

You knew deep down inside this would happen, but you hoped and prayed that it wasn't true. Perhaps Seulgi made you too happy, too brave. Everything else felt like it was going right so you convinced yourself this would too. You've flown too close to the sun and it backfired. You should've never said anything.

As you try to block out the fight unraveling in front of you you could only scream one thing while crying. "Wouldn't God want to love me? Wouldn't He want you to love me too?"

The scrape of the wooden chair echos as your mom shoots up straight. "I will not house some heathen under my roof. Get out until you realize what you've done to this family."

It's raining. The relentless torrent of water against your body traps in the coldness from the night, leaving you shivering as your feet move on their own. They move to the only other place that feels like home. The only other person that feels like home.

Soon enough you find yourself in front of a familiar door, incessantly knocking. Muffled footsteps come from the other side of the door as you hear locks being undone until the door finally opens. Instantly there's a look of worry on Mr. Kang's face as he takes in the scene in front of him. He quickly ushers you in and shuts the door.

"Who is it?" A voice rings from upstairs.

"It's Y/N!" Mr. Kang yells back, and soon enough you hear a flurry of footsteps coming downstairs. Seulgi, in her tired glory, appears. She rushes towards you as her father went off to find you some towels to dry off with.

"Oh my god, what happened? Why are you here? Are you okay?" Seulgi's honey eyes are glistening with worry. She doesn't seem to care too much about the fact that you're soaked as she embraces you in a hug. Her body soothes you, its warmth penetrating the cold, wet clothes that clung to your body. You let her ground you back to reality before speaking.

"I don't wanna talk about it right now." You barely manage to get the words out. Your throat feels tight, constricted. Throughout the entire time the tears haven't stopped running down your face as it mixed with the rain water. Seulgi rubs your back as her father comes back. Both of them begin patting you dry.

It feels a bit pathetic as you have two people fretting over you so much, but you're too tired to move. Maybe not even tired, but rather stuck in your own thoughts.

"Go get her something to change into. Are you gonna stay the night?" Her dad asks after making Seulgi go back upstairs to find clothes. You just nod in response and follow her.

When you enter Seulgi's room you find her hastily going through her drawers, finding something comfortable for you to wear. After digging through her clothes she hands you some sweatpants and an oversized shirt, much like her own outfit she was sporting. Your hands are in front of you and holding onto the clothing, yet you still can't seem to move much. Instead your lips tremble as you look at the floor. Seulgi sighs as she nears you, unfolding the clothes and looking at your trembling hands.

"Don't make me dress you." She half-teases. When she realizes you can't will yourself to move a grim line stretches across her face. She wonders what has gotten you so riled up to act this way.

Carefully, she removes your clothes and throws them into the laundry pile. Her fingers innocently skim your body as she puts on the clothes for you, with you doing the minimal movements required to help her. Over the years she's already been more than familiar with your body, and the same for you with her touch. Although you can't vocalize it you silently appreciate the care and intimacy she demonstrates.

Soon enough she finishes though and pulls you towards her bed. Sitting you down she places herself behind you after grabbing a dry towel. She begins to dry your hair while letting you stay silent. Another thing you appreciated about her. She let you take your time.

"Seulgi..." Your voice croaks out as if you've aged several decades.

"Yes?" She stops drying off your hair, instead placing the towel down as she wraps her arms behind you and leans forward.

"They know." She doesn't say anything but her body is still for a minute. Afterwards she finishes drying off your hair, at least one of you can stay calm in this situation. That's what you need. "They told me to come back when I come to my senses."

"It's okay. Everything will be okay. We'll figure something out." You let her guide you down on her bed. Your crying had stopped a while back, but the shock coursing through your body didn't. As Seulgi pulled up the sheets and began to hold you you turned around and looked at her. You looked into the eyes that told you everything. Right now they told you that all Seulgi had on her mind was you.

So you think that you should only think of Seulgi too, because you can always forget about the consequences when you're with her. With a kiss on your forehead she tells you to sleep. She gets impossibly closer to you, holding you tight. Holding you as if you are her treasure.

The familiar trees and houses enter your view as you drive down your childhood neighborhood. Your fingers tap on the steering wheel as you listen to the song Seulgi played in the car. Out of the corner of your eye you see her smile at the thought of visiting her parents. It's enough to make you happy as well.

As you near her parent's house you pass by your own. It's been years since you've been inside, years since you even saw it. You're okay with it though, but your mind still wonders how your parents are doing. You wonder if the house is lonelier now, if they ever think about the sparse letters and phone calls you have exchanged and how they always were fights. Do they know you and Seulgi are coming to visit? Will they want to see you?

Whatever the answer is it doesn't matter. The only family you have to worry about is the girl right next to you and her parents. You feel thankful that she's your first love and hopeful that she's your last. Despite how many times your lives have separated you two, how you both dated other people and had your own quarrels, you guys came back to each other in the end. She changed you during your formative years and supported you as the two of you have grown up.

No one else can make you uncover these sides and feelings like she does.

[nuoyipeach]

Make It Right

Kang Seulgi X Lee Taeyong

as said, here's a bonus part to Nothing/Something's Wrong

tags: @gerardeveryway @gomseulgiii

Coming back from the hospital in silence, Taeyong quietly texted both their mothers about her pregnancy, asking them to keep it a secret still. He also told his assistant he'd be taking the rest of the week off, and was about to put his phone away when it rang.

Seulgi didn't look this time, so he answered it. "Hello?"

"Hey, is Seulgi OK?"

"Yea she's fine, thanks for asking. She got a little weak from stress and some irregular meals."

"Oh, I hope she gets better. Don't stress out your wife like this Taeyong."

He chuckled softly. "When's your flight back?"

"Tonight actually, booked it right away after the meeting, can't wait to go back home, really missed my husband and kids."

"Oh well, I won't see you anymore then, so this is my goodbye."

"Bye, take care of your wife well."

He cut the call and noticed his wife's sullen expression, keeping his eyes ok the road as he spoke. "Soyeon's leaving tonight, she really missed her family." he peeked to see Seulgi's disinterested face, and knew she was in no mood to be made happy even. Sighing he reached and took her hand in his, kissing it before holding it on his leg.

Seulgi remained silent and dazed. She felt empty, despite being pregnant again. She thought she would be happy, her days of feeling sad and lonely over, but it was nothing like that. Even as they reached home she walked lifelessly inside, going straight to their bedroom and sitting on her side.

Taeyong followed behind her, taking off his suit, shirt and belt before sitting next to her, trying to get her to face him. Giving up he finally just cupped her face towards him. "What's wrong?" he asked calmly. She felt bad, he was always so calm, even times when she could tell he was angry, he would always calmly resolve everything.

She felt even worse thinking about the fact that she was causing problems over jealousy. It wasn't like her, and the thought of her being so annoying made her cry. Taeyong was taken aback, quickly hugging and soothing her.

"Don't cry baby." he spoke softly, only for her sobs to get louder. "OK OK, let it all out. I'm here, I'm here, I'll hold you." he pulled her over onto his lap and hugged her again, her face in his shoulder as she continued to cry, hands gripping his shirt on his back. "You're fine Seulgi."

"I'm so-sorry." she cried out. "I don't like this... I'm sorry I'm crying..."

"Why are you crying?" he asked softly.

"I don't know... It hurts... My heart hurts..." one of her hands snaked up between their bodies, pressing herself where her heart was. "It hurts so bad..."

Taeyong felt like crying hearing his wife's words. He pulled her out and brought her hand from her chest to his lips, his other hand wiping away her tears. He then gently turned them over, laying her flat on the bed and hovered above her, hand tracing down her blouse and taking off her buttons slowly. He put his hand on her bare chest, rubbing gentle circles with his fingers underneath her left breast.

"Talk to me." he laid on his side and said, his other arm under her and holding her close while he continued massaging her skin. "Tell me everything."

Seulgi's hands remained on her tummy, thinking about the baby. "It hurts... I don't want to do anything... I just want to die..." her words caught him off guard, looking directly at her as his hand stopped. She looked at him, teary eyed, about to cry again. "It won't go... It hurts... I'm sorry..."

"Shh..." Taeyong cupped her face, kissing her softly. "You're going through a lot right now. We just found out about the baby, but you were overthinking about Soyeon, and stressed from work. Don't worry about anything love, I'll take care of you." he moved his hand to her chest again. "I'll make it go away, trust me. I love you, I don't want you hurting."

He helped her out of her clothes, pulling over one of his loose shirts on her before changing himself and getting back into bed. He cradled her in his arms, kissing her face every now and then, one arm hugging her to himself while the other rested on her tummy.

"When the baby comes, we'll make the room next to ours pink." he said trying to distract her, which seemed to have been working.

"Why pink?" she asked back softly. "What if it's a boy?"

"I want a girl." Taeyong smiled. "I want to be able to do what I see Johnny do with his daughters."

Seulgi pouted, seemingly upset. "So you won't love it if it's a boy?"

He quickly shook his head. "I would, I'd love our baby no matter what. I just really want a girl, but a boy is good too. As long as our baby's healthy, nothing else matters." he stared back at her, smiling as he pressed his forehead on hers. "As long as you both are happy and healthy, my life couldn't be anymore perfect."

Seulgi fell asleep in his arms, but he stayed awake longer just watching her and running his fingers through her hair, thoughts running through his mind in fast. Getting tired, snuggled up next to her, praying things will go smoothly this time.

>>>

It had only been a week since they found out when he caught Seulgi sitting in their bathtub crying. She was fully clothed, which was just her pyjama top and shorts, and there was no water. She just sat there alone.

"Baby what's wrong?" he quickly got in next to her and held her face up. "What happened?"

Seulgi heaved breaths, when he noticed her hands clutching the material of her shorts so tight her nails were scratching her skin underneath.

"The baby... wants to go... I can't let it go Taeyong... Not again..."

After some consoling, he found out her dream. She felt awake, and heard a child's voice saying they're leaving, causing her to wake up hysterical in fear. Taeyong realised she was not at all ready to be left alone, and finally told both their families so that they could both have time off work and any other events coming up.

Seulgi felt bad for causing this isolation situation for Taeyong, but she was more scared of herself. If she was being hysterical now, what more when the baby is born? She's heard how scary postpartum is, and only wished it wouldn't happen to her.

Wanting to avoid it, she tried her best avoiding any more break downs until their next check-up. As the doctor scanned her belly, she had a slight disturbed look which only worried Seulgi more.

"Ma'am, has anything been stressing you out lately?" she asked once they sat back down. "Your blood pressure's high, so is your bpm, this isn't good for the baby."

Taeyong noticed her hands shaking again and quickly held onto them before looking at the doctor. "When we found out, she was going through some things..." he looked at Seulgi, who stared back, and he knew they'd need to come clean. "She's been a little hysterical, cries a lot, shakes from anxiety, stopped working as well. She just doesn't want to do anything and always stays in bed. I don't mind it, I'd like for her to take plenty of rest for the baby and her own health, but with how sad she's been I'm worried."

The doctor took note of all Taeyong said, looking into her computer and back at Seulgi's book. "Since she's not working, we can rule out work as the cause of stress. I would prescribe medicine for your nerves and pressure, but since this is a first time issue and you're pregnant it would be risky." she seemed deep in thought for a moment before speaking again. "Try some herbal calming for now, like flower teas, nothing with caffeine. And for you Mr Lee I'd suggest having her under observation as much as you can. I know how scary it must be for you after the first two times, but you can't let that ruin your experience now. Stress and anxiety are also causes of miscarriage."

Hearing that, Seulgi's eyes widened and she gulped in fear. Taeyong noticed and held her face towards him. "You'll be fine, don't get so scared."

At home he helped her into bed and they both laid down to rest, his fingers drumming her tummy mindlessly. "How many months did she say you're at now?" he asked softly.

"Around two." she replied, suddenly sighing before looking his way. "I'm scared... I know you said don't be, but I am... What if-"

"Nothing." he cut her off, his body now hovering above her, one hand balancing him while the other cupped her cheek. "Remember what she said, stress can cause miscarriage. Don't think about anything negative. Think about what colour we'll make our baby's room, what'll their name be. Think about where we'll go for our first family trip."

The last one seen to have caught her attention off the sadness. "I always wanted to go to Disneyland with our baby..." she mumbled, a slight smile forming on her face. Taeyong smiled back, kissing her lips.

"We'll go once they're old enough, but maybe let's try Paju or Busan first, nearby you know."

>>>

With some extra care, Seulgi was feeling happier and better, her pregnancy going smoothly as well. She decided to take off from work completely as she realised being a mother is her first priority, and she'd need plenty of time for it. Plus Taeyong told her he'd hire her back anytime she'd want, it was his father's company after all.

Taeyong himself worked half days, and whenever he wasn't home her mother would stay over to keep Seulgi company. Sometimes she'd go to his office to spend time outside too, watching Taeyong go through paperwork was something she oddly found attractive now.

Of course he noticed it, and knew it was because of her hormones, but to his own satisfaction he loved it.

"Yong-ah~" he looked up to see his wife pouting sitting on the couch of his office, and smiled at her. She lifted her arms, asking for a hug, to which he chuckled shaking his head.

"One second love, let me finish this, then we'll go home and cuddle."

"No... Can't you just hug me for five minutes please? I won't bother you after that."

Seeing her pleading face he knew he can't say no, and got up to sit next to her. He opened his arms and she immediately snuggled into his chest sideways, since her five month old bump was in the way.

She pressed her head against his chest, content at hearing his heart beat, feeling even happier when he kissed her head. "I'll have two babies to take care of." he said chuckling, causing her to look up at him with a pout, and he didn't hold back from kissing her lips. "Have you picked names yet? I was thinking Jinu for boy, and Areum for girl."

Seulgi leaned her head against his chest again, deep in thought. "I like Areum, but not Jinu. How about Sian?" she head a hum from him before he nodded.

"Alright then. Sian or Areum," he placed a hand on her belly. "let's see who wins."

>>>

Things never go too perfect, there's always a turning point. For Seulgi it was the sudden feeling in her chest that made her fall to the ground crying. It was like she felt pain, but not physically.

It's in your head, in your head, it's fine, you're overthinking again... Stop it...

"Baby what's wrong!?" she heard her husband's voice, and felt him hold her up immediately in his arms hugging her. "Seulgi look here, I'm here. What happened?"

She couldn't look up, one hand holding her belly as if it was going to fall, the other clutching his shirt tight as she dug her face in his chest. "It hurts... My heart hurts..."

Taeyong knew what she meant, quickly carrying her up bridal style and laying her in bed, hugging her tight in his embrace. "Cry it out, it's fine. You're having a panic attack." he cradled her in his arms, her face tucked in his chest wetting his shirt with her tears. He didn't talk anymore and just held her, making white noises and threading fingers through her hair to calm her down.

After a few minutes he could feel her body go limp, and slowly laid her down properly in bed. He sat next to her and cupped her face, her eyes struggling to stay open. He kissed her forehead before tucking her in bed, giving a small smile.

"Rest, talk when you're ready." he got up and turned on the mood lamp she bought on impulse not too long ago, and turned on her favourite soft piano music. He got his laptop and sat back next to her. "Just breath and relax, don't think about anything." he said kissing her forehead again. "I'll be right here."

Just like any other night, Taeyong sat in bed working with his laptop on a small table, Seulgi asleep next to him. Her body faced him, arm across his waist. Every now and then he'd look at her and smile, brushing through her hair, touching her baby bump, before getting back to work.

Once he felt he was done, he put everything away and got under the covers, pulling his wife into his arms and kissed her lips softly. He felt slight movement as her baby bump pressed against his own tummy, and chuckled at how the baby seemed to be shifting in its sleep.

He kissed her lips again, and whispered "I love you." before falling asleep himself too. He made it a priority to remind her every day she's loved, he loves her, their love is never ending, no matter the obstacles that come in their way.

It didn't matter how many times she'd fall, he would always be there to pick her up.

In the middle of the night, Seulgi woke up as the baby kept moving, and sat up sighing. "Areum please..." she whispered softly, patting her belly gently. "I'm tired..."

Her whispers were enough to wake her husband up, and he immediately sat up next to her and pulled her in a side hug, his other hand patting her belly too. "Areum-ah... Let your mummy sleep." he said out loud. Shocking enough, the baby's movements slowed catching both parents by surprise. "You like daddy's voice?" Taeyong asked leaning closer to her belly, and Seulgi could feel her stopping more and smiled.

"Can you sing please? Maybe she'll fall asleep." she asked softly, to which he nodded excitedly.

Seulgi laid back down while Taeyong laid his head just below her belly on her lap, faced her belly and lifted her shirt to kiss her exposed skin. "Daddy will put you both to sleep." he mumbled smiling and started to hum a soft tune before singing.

Seulgi could feel her eyelids get heavier, her hand threaded through his hair. She felt at ease, especially when the baby stopped moving completely and she figured it was asleep. Taeyong stayed on her lap falling asleep to, and she finally allowed herself to do the same.

She knew she had nothing to ever worry about again, he was always there for her. Even as she feared he'd get sick of her, she knew it was just her overthinking it all. She loved him, and she knew he loved her nonetheless.

Thank you Taeyong...

>>>