#duke i may be in love with ur mom sorry

[breadandblankets]

I love love love when people draw/write duke as having gold eyes and I would like to say: Elaine's eyes are black, like the reaches of space they seem to pull light into their orbit

when she uses her powers a lot her irises will start to eat into her sclara, like not even the whites of her eyes are safe from her gravitational pull

[strlitetheatre]

MARK CHASITY THOUGHTS !!

thank you @biscuits-spooky-diner [ sorry for the tag again lol ] for reminding me w ur reblog i went fucking bananas w this LMAO

a lot of these are heavily headcanon-centric and i wanna preface that before i get into it bc i know some people may not agree!! thats fine!! i just like thinking these silly lil things

thoughts below the cut because its a Lot and i may add to this but idk?? shrugs we'll see

━◦○◦━◦○◦━

starting off strong, i really am a sucker for the 'two [ or more ] characters that one actor/actress plays are related on some level' concept and i believe mark and duke are cousins bc CAN U IMAGINEE

theyre cousins on their moms sides but their moms dont really get along due to differing views and ways of parenting, but mark and duke are pretty close. theyre each others favourite cousin

━◦○◦━◦○◦━

mark and karen are both gay in opposite directions but they were very close friends growing up due to overlapping social groups (their parents, church groups, most likely abstinence camp goers, etc), and because of their respective families and being unable to be true to themselves, they got married and had grace very early after they graduated highschool

mark loves karen very much, but purely platonically. he is the type to tease her, sometimes poke fun at her, and he respects her immensely! they both work insanely well as a duo, and they hold down the fort of their picket fence home extremely well, but they are not in love

he n karen live a very domestic life, they can even be pretty physically affectionate at times [ hugs, cuddling, kisses to the head, cheeks, hands even ] and share quick 'i love you's before separating for the day, but something about it was always just slightly askew from romantic love and affection

━◦○◦━◦○◦━

circling back to highschool, mark and ted definitely had a secret on-again-off-again relationship for at least a few months to a year.

they inevitably fell out because ted was sick and tired of being kept as a secret [ i have so so many thoughts about the spankoffskis too dont get me started on that tho ] and ended up giving mark an ultimatum: either choose to stay with ted and become public, or choose his family and run away from himself

i think its clear which mark chose. they dont talk much anymore

━◦○◦━◦○◦━

his middle name is anthony :33 no reason for this i just think it fits. mark anthony chasity :3333

he is a very sensitive man! growing up was extremely hard for him between an overbearing and coddling mother, and a hardassed and pushy father, and being heavily sheltered on top of it all

he wasnt shown a lot of genuine love and affection growing up (his mother would lovebomb him, his father didnt believe he needed it, and they were both pretty strict considering he was their only child) and he tries to do better with grace but still ends up unintentionally repeating cycles out of wanting to keep her 'safe'

he truly does love his daughter, he loves grace s o fucking much, but he n karen didnt have many positive role models to base themselves off of parenting-wise, therefore carrying a lot of fabricated truth into their relationships both separately and together with grace

━◦○◦━◦○◦━

mark has an architecture degree and he would love to be an actual architect but alas. realty was what he could get into

hes the one in charge of most of the chasity homes interior decoration! he has an eye for colours n specifically he really enjoys pastels, but his favourite colour overall is actually green

━◦○◦━◦○◦━

MARK CHASITY IS THE MARK FROM WORKIN BOYS [ getting forcefully pulled off stage, gripping the mic ] PLEASE P[LEASE JUSR HEAR ME OUT

before mark began working in realty, he worked at a bank. golden parachutes bank [ 'golden parachutes' is something mentioned in show stoppin number w like no context?? this concept is my gfs idea tho ] [ **I WAS INFORMED ITS A BUSINESS TERM but atp i feel like hatchetfield Would have a bank named after a business term lmfao ]

mark met greg through duke when he was about 20 or so [ I ALSO FIRMLYY BELIEVE THE GREG FROM WORKIN BOYS IS MAXS DAD BUT MY JÄGERMAN FAMILY TREE IS A WHOOOLEE OTHER CAN OF WORMS ], began seeing him, and greg was the one to bring mark into the polycule around 23-24

all of them worked at the bank! henry hidgens was one of the younger executives there

HIS N HENRYS DYNAMIC SPECIFICALLY was never sexual i believe, but it wasnt healthy overall because there was a power imbalance between them, and i also believe mark wouldve been one of the younger men in the polycule

henry and mark had a very 'wolf and lamb' dynamic, mark being perceived and treated as 'innocent' due to how he carries himself and how he was raised, and henry sometimes doing specific things to intimidate and even scare mark

all in all things do not go well. yeah. i am Not gonna get too deep into that bc it delves into pure indulgent au headcanon bullshit [ this entire post rlly lol ] but to shorten it: i believe mark to be a sole survivor of the workin boys incident in some aus and after the deaths of the boys he quits the banking job n goes into realty god bles

━◦○◦━◦○◦━

coughs. anyway. he really likes historical art and i believe mark n grace are so similar in how theyre both So abnormal about historical things [ graces general interest and infatuation w the waylon place and its history that she basically infodumps about in npmd ]

he would infodump about historical pieces and their stories to anyone that would listen, which is usually his wife or daughter

SPEAKING of historical art n bringing back his architecture degree, when grace was around 10 mark built her an exactly-to-scale miniature replica of the waylon place as a dollhouse, down to the scaffolding, lighting, wall decor, etc

it took him years and was a complete surprise. it is his favourite and most pride-inducing project to date, even more bc it was for his baby

[heleizition]

Hello, can I please get some steph or cass or duke headcanons because all the others' backstories have been kind of covered? It's totally fine if you don't wanna, just wanted to say I love your au :) have a good day!!!

IM SORRY AA im not really sure how to integrate duke yet into the family (like he’s here and Adopted and hs parents are alive and Not Ok i think but idk HOW yk ????) and cass’s backstory doesnt change much, she just doesnt keep on Fighting,,, steph is a bit more complicated i think ? ill get into it at some point i swear ;_; !!!!!! but here are a few shifter au hc on duke, steph and cass !!!!

• steph is the one who taught tim how to skateboard !!!! and also rollers, later

• steph : id sell bruce for two cornflakes

also steph : bruce maybe ur not my dad but ur also kind of the only father figure i have rn and i rly need to be told im doing good and to get a hug but ur annoying and i dont like u but ur also kind of my dad anyway give me a fucking hug or ill bite u • cass sometimes goes out shifted into a bat to follow bruce bc a) she wants to make sure her dad is fine b) its fucking funny that the batman is followed by a bat dont u think • duke has his light powers and they’re slowly developping and he’s getting help from the league and sometimes everything is too much and he gets big headaches,,,, there is always a sibling to cuddle with to make the pain Go tho

• STEPH BECOMES A VETERINARIAN which also takes care of shifters when shifted btw

• duke gets his shifting from his dad who was also a komodo dragon

• duke is pretty close to jason they are book nerds together, but they also have widely different opinions on books which ends up with loud book debates at 2 in the morning (dont ask me about those specific opinions i havent read a book in my life thanks)

• cass is mostly verbal after two to three years after being adopted, but they all learned sign language for her. she uses it with tim and jason the most bc the three of them have non verbal days.

• steph’s favorite cuddle buddy is dick (as coyote steph and panther dick)

• cass isn’t sure what she wants to do yet but she got into a lot of different activities. one of her favorite is scuba diving.

• im still not sure what duke will do in the future sobs he’s still confused bc he got a Lot on his mind between his parents and his meta abilities and his shifting that gets to be a bit of a pain in the winter bc winter takes up a lot of energy for him

• cass is the second best at finding tim when he’s hiding (second only to selina who is also Cat and she may or may have not mom instinct when it comes to tim)

• one of cass’s favorite place to doze off is shifted, into an apron’s pocket, while jay or alfred cook. it smell nice and they both either sing or talk to her or hum,, its nice

• steph’s mom isnt a shifter ! it comes from arthur brown sadly >:( sometimes it makes steph upset 

• steph’s mom loves when steph is shifted and worked out muscles to be able to carry her coyote daughter and thats so very nice

• duke voice hey u think u could be pal with killer croc ???? we are scally buddies idk man

dick voice duke . duke no . duke .

• duke is the best imposter in among us

• duke blushed everytime dick, cass, jay and tim have called him little brother or an equivalent for the first few months  after hes been adopted.

• damian always goes to cass when he’s angry or needs to let off some steam bc they have both been Trained to kill and can handle each other

mmmm thats all my brain can muster rn i simply Love Them

[nanshe-of-nina]

People of the Edwardian phase of the Hundred Years War as dril tweets

Philippe VI de France: Time and time Again. People on here Fuck me over and ruin my life. simply for starting the Dialouge.

Edward III of England: thinking of wrapping my entire body in barbed wire and becoming Sovereign.

Jehan II de France: a teen approached me at the food court and said “I see you wore your clown costume today” and i spent the next 9 hours processing the insult.

Jehanne de Bourgogne: CHILD: Papa.. tell me once more about WIFE’s DUTY. PAPA: it is WIFE’s DUTY to protect her husband from villains, always.

Jitka Lucemburská: Damn. the MomTown forums just started requiring 4 point Mom Verificaiton to be able to post there for some reason..anyone got a work around?

Philippa de Hainaut: my opinion on politics: my opinion on politics is that politidcs is extremely good, but sometimes it is bad.

Ludwig IV, Holy Roman Emperor: bigmouth fake priest telling me to “drink a shitload of holy water and kill yourself” as penance? this has happened at three churches now.

Pope Benedict XII: it is with a heavy heart that i must announce that the celebs are at it again.

Jehan III, duc de Bretagne: i just left an enormous pile of vomit behind golds gym for all of you abominable pig clowns to pick at #blackfridaydeals

Robert III d’Artois: (in really quiet, barely audible voice) hope your dick falls of bitch.

Hugues Quiéret: currently employed as Water Guru at the beach. it’s sort of like being a lifeguard except i have no inclination to touch the drowning people.

Geoffroy d’Harcourt: OH im so Fucking sorry “Your Majesty”, i didnt realize that dick rings were banished in this dystopian piss earth. Ur probably a 9gag poster.

Jacob van Artevelde: (in highly rational and cool voice) i have the higher follower count than them. i wiont let them undermine me.

Pope Clement VI: may the wind carry my tweets and soothte the sick, the wounded, the downtrodden of both man & beast, across the savage shit earth of trolls,

Jehanne de Valois, comtesse de Hainaut: startling how im the only person on this site with an actual human soul. you would think the other guys on here have one, but no.

Eudes IV, duc de Bourgogne: myth: making me mad is cool FACT: making me mad is a crap move& people who do it are all sociopathivc criminals with fucked up rotten brains.

Jehan de Montfort: turning my headlights off when driving at night,.. so that my Rivals cannot see me.

Jehanne de Flandre: i just want to find the optimal bra for sniper operations, but everoyne here is so rude, and pieces of shit.

Johann der Blinde of Bohemia: Q: If your post was proven by a counsil of wise men to be racist, or bullshit, would you bar it from the record? A: I do not delete my posts.

Charles II, comte d’Alençon: ((SPILLING BLOOD ALL OVER KEYBOARD) THIS IS WHAT U WANT. THIS IS WHAT U FUCKING BASTARDS WANT RIGHT (1 WEEK LATER) WHY ARE THE KEYS STICKING

Jehanne de Clisson: as far as im concerned the best revenge is ordering wolf piss online & pouring it into soneones car. “living well” is too hard.

Arnaud de Cervole: i will raze every forest and devour each city in blood tribute for the crime of 9/11!! please nbring back blue collar TV

Frank Hennequin: the jduge orders me to take off my anonymous v mask & im wearing the joker makeup underneath it. everyone in the courtroom groans at my shit.

William Montagu, 1st Earl of Salisbury: im at the point in my life where i cant relate to any popular fictional characters unless they use massive amounts of hair gel and steriods.

Antonio Doria: my name is Destyn. i build crossbows and sell weed to all your dads and im 15.

Gautier VI de Brienne: MYTH: my posts are for the Pauper REALITY: my posts are for the Prince.

Étienne Marcel: looked at a newspaper today. looks like we’re getting taxed out the wazoo, with this president. anyone else see this shit? tax out the wazoo.

Guillaume Cale: “FEAR IS USED 2 ENSLAVE THE MASSES,” I SAID AS I RIPPED THE FUCKIN DECORATIVE CARDBOARD SKELETON OFF OF THE COMMUNITY CENTERS BULLETIN BOARD

Edward Montagu, 1st Baron Montagu: girls always love to telling people not to“ Mansplain” but they do not care of, “Man's Pain”

Louis Iᵉʳ, comte de Flandre: 1) i do not owe you mother fuckers a damn thing 2) i will not hear any more questions or comments unless they pertain to MetroPCS, or Pepsi.

Philippe III de Navarre: the crusaders fire ballistas into my throbbing diaper- unlesashing a torrent of mustard yellow shit and poisoning the entire village.

Gaston II, comte de Foix: i am going to plunge a sword into our bed and officially end outr 40 yr marriage if you do not stop yelling while i am recording my stream’s.

Henry de Grosmont, 1st Duke of Lancaster: please help my cousin “Bruno_THought_Leader” who just had his account suspended for threatening to “Fuck” brexit.

Robert Le Coq, Bishop of Laon: i have absolutely zero interest in friendship, i have absolutely zero interest in jokes, i am simply here to collect data and earn respect.

Jehan Iᵉʳ, comte d’Armagnac: the joke is on you fuck face. i actually love getting screamed at and publicly shamed for my dumb-assed bull shit . I love apologizing.

Bardi and Peruzzi families: boy oh boy do i love purchasing large amounnts of Fool’s Gold. wait a minute... fools gold fucking sucks. this stuff is no good..!! Fuck !!!

Jehanne II de Navarre: i regret being tasked the emotional burden of maintaining the final bastion of morality and NIce manners in this endless ocean of human SHIT.

William de Bohun, 1st Earl of Northampton: if you have less than 1000 followers i can guarantee you that me and the boys share your posts in vip chat rooms and call you a "Muthafucka”.

William de la Pole: thinking about getting the dow jones back on track, simply by making a few phonecalls. but certain people have been a bitch to me, so i wont.

Thomas de Beauchamp, 11th Earl of Warwick: shutting computer down until the shitty moods & attitudes can fuck off., if you need me ill be on my other computer, sititng 60° to my right.

Thomas Holland, 1st Earl of Kent: ive heard from a reliable source that people arre putting their lips on to my girl friends avatars and going “muah muah muah.” cut it out.

Raoul II de Brienne, comte d’Eu: hate it when my boss knocks out the front leg of my desk with a baseball bat and funko pop lego shit flies every where.

Karel IV, Holy Roman Emperor: “RESULT You are the Serpant. YOu dislike loud places and people are constantly putting drama in your life. But you’re strong.” This is true.

Charles de Blois-Châtillon: torturing my damn dick with corn cob holders in Penance for the foul tone i took with the subway corporation today.

Jehanne de Penthièvre: i help every body, im not racist, i keep myself nice, and when i ask for a single re-tweet in return i am told to fuck off, fuck myself, etc.

Jacques Iᵉʳ de Bourbon, comte de La Marche: “ah boo hoo hoo i want to post Foul comments to content leaders” Fat Chance, Dimwit. I will annihilate you under bulwark of the Law and God.

John Chandos: DOCTOR: you cant keep doing this to yourself. being The Last True Good Boy online will destroy you. you must stop posting with honor ME: No,

Jehan d’Artos, comte d’Eu: , who had gone missing for 17 years and was presumed dead after failing to return from his ultimate dumpster diving life quest

William Douglas, 1st Earl of Douglas: i get emails. i get emails saying the trolls have won, and that i should bow to them, since i have lost the battle. to this i say FAT-CHANCE.

David II of Scotland: “jail isnt real,” i assure myself as i close my eyes and ram the hallmark gift shop with my shitty bronco.

Charles de La Cerda: i think that turning myself Gay in the summer of 2013 would really impress my overseas investors.

William de Montagu, 2nd Earl of Salisbury: my watch beeps whwich means its time to stand in front of my ex-wife’s house and play “Hit THe Road Jack” while dacning and licking her mail.

Edward the Black Prince: IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL

Jehan III de Grailly: its fucked up how there are like 1000 christmas songs but only 1 song aboutr the boys being back in town.

Louis II, comte de Flandre: U Have Forced Me To Take Extreme Measures To Protect My Business And My Lifestyle.

Blanche de Navarre: the wise man bowed his head solemnly and spoke “theres actually zero difference between good & bad things. you imbecile. you fucking moron”

Charles II de Navarre: Sovereign Citizens Getting Owned Compilation

Philippe de Navarre: shooting off automatic rifles making horrible diarrhea shit noises as the recoil makes my tiny dick flop around. hell yeah. thats cool to me.

Charles, Dauphin de Viennois: surprise, dad. while you were witnessing the pennsylvania state lottery i tried on all your work gloves and they looked very handsome on me.