#especially when you have ptsd

[youchangedmedestiel]

When I write fanfiction I tend to justify every narrative or characters' choices I make because I want people to understand my choices as a writer, but I think this is not the best way to write a story so I need to improve that.

Or maybe MAYBE it's just because I'm traumatized by SPN writers who leave things open to interpretation, who knows?

[thedreadvampy]

sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'

[savage-rhi]

Magenta.

[uselessnbee]

everyone understands that Will had a hard time helping El and standing up for her because he himself has trauma from being bullied his whole life and doesn't know how to fight them back, his reaction to bullying is to freeze. but suddenly no one understands it when it comes to Mike and he's just called an asshole for not being able to stand up and fight El's bullies

i'm not saying he is innocent and did nothing wrong. he could have done more and just handle the situation better but he was just too focused on Will and was in his head and being the otherthinking oblivious dumbass that he is

but just imagine your girlfriend tells you she is having a good time and has friends, she does not mention anything bad and then suddenly she's getting bullied in front of you. when you've been bullied your whole life your first reaction is to freeze, to panic and just wait and hope it passes quickly and they'll leave you alone. Mike did not have any knowledge about her bullying or having any kind of problems, as long as he was aware those people were her friends. he himself has trauma from being bullied (he literally mentions it later on why yall keep forgetting??) and being suddenly thrown into a situation involving bullying can be really distressing.

when you have experience with being bullied even just seeing someone else getting bullied can make you freeze up and panic. and we know that Mike does not stand up for himself when he's the victim. even when you're not on the receiving end of the bullying but you just see it happening and suddenly you're a scared little kid again holding back tears desperately hoping for them to leave you alone.

and i know everyone wants to yell at me "you forgot about Mike standing up to Troy when they were saying shit about Will! so he can obviously stand up for his friends so why can't he for El??" and no i did not forget and yes you may be right but the situations are different. Mike was very well aware of Troy's bullying. he was involved in it. he was the victim there. he's had to deal with his bullying for years it was not a shocking revelation. however he did not know about El's situation at all and your reaction can be very different when you know about something and when you have no knowledge and it suddenly happens

again i'm not saying that he did nothing wrong. i'm just saying that we need to consider his trauma and his point of view and it could make him think less rationally and therefore not being able to help properly. maybe if he knew beforehand that something could go wrong he could be prepared and he would handle the situation better (even if it would be just them seeing Angela and her friends come and they would turn to Mike and say quickly that those people are mean to El he would still have at least some time and could prepare himself). but he did not know that and he was not prepared for this situation to suddenly escalate like this. he was unprepared and probably panicking and didn't know what to do so no he wasn't much of a help.

and maybe we should stop acting like this traumatised 14 years old kid needs to solve every problem and act rationally in every situation and not to make any mistakes (especially when he has no knowledge to prepare him for something distressing) and overall just putting everything on his shoulders and then insult and hate him when it does not end up perfectly well

and maybe i'm just being my overprotective extremely defensive self who's looking too much into this who knows

and i can't even properly put into words what i'm trying to say but if it makes sense to someone then great!

[trolls-poppy-specialist]

okay now I need a fic compilation of what were to happen if carmen were to be sick in every episode of the series

like, getting taken by VILE or some team red comfort (especially with the introduction of dadowsan)…

[suncaptor]

literally every main character has autistic traits and ptsd let's be real.

[twinknote]

i have a feeling my mom (who has acted extremely upset + sympathetic about me sweating profusely in my shitty 80+ degree room) is going to tell me that they can’t help me replace my 20+ year old ac unit for $250, even tho they are about to pay Thousands of dollars to replace their central ac bc clearly her needs are more important than mine (when one of my worst and most impactful symptoms is heat intolerance, which makes me dehydrated and even more dizzy and fatigued and i’ve been getting dehydration headaches even tho i’m drinking almost a gallon a day)

[switchcase]

I was wondering, do you have any thoughts on functional neurological disorder?

Oh I have a LOT of thoughts about FND. It would be very very long to be detailed about it so the TL;DR is that there are already conditions that were thought to be symptoms of conversion disorder (FND's old name) that turned out to be their own separate disorders (eg, fibromyalgia). I think it is pretty lazy science (and also very very lazy practice) for a doctor to see a bunch of symptoms and declare that because You Personally couldn't figure out the cause that it must therefore be psychological.

FND is essentially a catchall diagnosis even at the best of times, for "physical symptoms that cannot be explained." At the worst of times doctors use it as an excuse to punt a patient into therapy and effectively wipe their hands clean of a "difficult" case. As a very blatant example, there is already Medical Discourse about people with Long COVID symptoms getting diagnosed with FND.

I DO think that psychosomatic symptoms and physical symptoms caused by neurological disorders are an important topic and this is NOT to say FND doesn't exist At All. But I do think FND is majorly overdiagnosed in people that have conditions that Could be explained by something else but were met with a doctor that didn't care or was too frustrated by the various symptoms to look further. I hope that more of the field accepts the neurological side of FND and that more research is done into the neurological aspects of FND because I am...not really convinced that it is One single disorder. The symptom set still looks pretty incoherent to be one single thing, and the fact that two separate disorders are listed as a Symptom of FND is kind of insane to me.

[just-rogi]

.

[fancycat-thesilvertux]

I headcanon that Ben has Complex PTSD or C-PTSD for short. C-PTSD is different than PTSD in that PTSD is experienced after going through a traumatic experience whereas C-PTSD occurs when exposed to repeated or ongoing trauma. Look at the link provided for more information if you’re curious.

Considering the dark moments of the B10 series, such as the GhostFreak arc back in the OG series, I like to think my headcanon has more merit than not.

[karmaphone]

Sometimes I can’t let people stay at the shelter because they are violent or pose a threat to children not because they are not well liked or unpleasant. As a public servant I do not deny help to those who are unpleasant i deny help to people who are actively putting me or others at risk.

Then the post wasn't about you, One Of The Good Ones. stay in ur lane

[doevademe]

Oh maaaaaan they dropped the 1st PJO trailer!

Well, I just saw it, and I gotta say... It looks pretty good. Nothing mind-blowing, but it's just a teaser with the first book opening lines. Once we see the acting and direction they are going with, I'll be more excited or wary.

[kittycak3s]

Is there such a thing as like rehabilitative programs for disabled people? like...for more than just physical disabilities (although I know from experience support for those are severely lacking in general)

I have yet to find anything that's not incredibly hostile to me as a childhood torture survivor, autistic person & someone who's severely chronically ill

Like I know for a fact I can't live alone but I think I could maintain some level of independence with enough support.

[switchcase]

I'm getting so confused by Medicare. I got automatically enrolled in Extra Help so I got Part D but I still have a deductible but apparently if you qualify for the savings program you'd have $0 deductible? And then there's the whole Medicare Advantage/Part C vs Original Medicare.

[coaltars]

.

[absentlyabbie]

i'll tell you what converted me to being all-in on keeping cats indoors only:

living for a year and a half in a rural area with a sudden feral cat colony explosion on the property.

i moved in with my folks for a bit and at that time, one (1) stray cat mama had taken up residence on the property, but was too feral to let my mother anywhere near her. but especially after she brought three kittens around, mom fed her and the kittens in hopes they'd grow trusting enough she could catch for spay and neuter at the minimum. momcat stayed mean and hella wary, but the kittens would hang around a little nearer and play with my mom via long stick, but still wouldn't come close enough to touch or catch.

unfortunately, two of the three kittens were girls and started having kittens of their own before further progress was made, shortly after i moved in. and that was pretty much instant doom.

there were so many kittens. SO MANY. multiple litters. every time we turned around, more kittens.

we fed them. we hunted for and located the kittens every time anywhere on the property and would move them to a repurposed doghouse anytime a mama cat had them somewhere else, so that they could grow up human-socialized and we could spay/neuter them when they were old enough. (also it was a handy tactic to push the issue of the mamas getting more used to/trusting of us themselves. only really worked with one of them, though.)

and we watched them die.

we watched litter after litter of kittens never make it to the age they could be spayed or neutered. the moms stayed, for the longest time, too skittish to more than briefly touch, much less catch and crate for a vet visit.

it sounds like a silly joke to say i have kitten-related ptsd, but i absolutely do.

too many goddamn times i'd walk out of the garage and find the carport and gravel drive strewn with tiny bodies. others simply went missing, never to be found.

one in particular, i wish i hadn't found, and the visual literally haunts me still, almost a decade later.

i saw so many kittens die of snake bite, spider bite, wild dogs, birds of prey, hit by cars, respiratory illness, covered in fleas and eyes crusted with infection.

and we loved them all. scrimped for antibiotics if the vet could be convinced to give it to us despite our being unable to bring them in. bought flea collars and ointments. we cared for them and fed them and petted them and played with them, brushed their fur and cleaned up their little faces, put ice in their water in hot summer, rigged a heating lamp in their house in the winter.

and they died. horribly. that property is pocked with unmarked graves of kittens and cats.

all the best intentions, not enough resources, and it didn't matter anyways because the population went from three to almost twenty (at times, over thirty) in the blink of an eye.

they died and died and died. our hearts broke over and over again. the stress and anxiety wore us down like sandpaper. i think, by the end of it all, we managed to find less than 10 of them all homes, including batman the disabled kitten i found a home across the country through tumblr.

it was carnage and tragedy, frankly. and we were helpless.

it only ended because they started dying faster than they could be born, and because we finally caught the two remaining mom cats in traps and got them spayed.

the points about outdoor cats being invasive predators devastating to local wildlife populations is true and valid and important.

but i know cat people, and cat people who don't know better than to let cats outdoors. what matters to you is the cat itself, generally. the cat being happy and taken care of.

keeping cats outdoors, letting them outdoors, is not taking care of the cats. it's not protecting them. it's not giving them any happiness or invigoration that couldn't be provided to them as indoor-only pets with just a little research and effort.

they die. they get ill. they get hurt. they're at risk of predators, and cars, and disease, and carelessly cruel children and deliberately cruel adults. they're at risk of disappearing on you because someone else saw a cat outdoors and intervened to give it a better, safer life not in conflict with the local environment.

and if that offends and angers you that someone would just take a cat they saw roaming outdoors, even collared, and that it sounds like i'm endorsing that, i am, but not if you intervene and be that person yourself for your own cat.

if what matters to you is doing right by your cat because it's family and a living creature whose happiness and health and safety is important to you,

keep them indoors. not part time. always. exclusively.

edit: since apparently i need to clarify this, i'm saying cats should live inside, that they should not live outdoors, even part time. visiting the outdoors supervised on a leash or in an enclosed catio is not the same as even part-time living outside, and i am certainly not advocating against it.