Tumgik
#everything i said abt being in love was a lie actually
chrisbangs · 2 years
Text
him dipping after saying smth like that i'm gonna kick his ass
1 note · View note
museofthepyre · 9 months
Text
Thinking abt Elijah and Jedidiah again, I’ve said a lot of it before, but I’m expanding here (finale spoilers btw):
I think Jeddie and Elijah were intentionally written to represent the opposing extremes of unhealthy love/ affection. It’s a symbolic parallel, they’re complete opposites in terms of attachment style… but they’re united in the fact that they’re both hurting Sydney (the subject of their feelings).
Jedidiah embodies cold, distant, withdrawn and purely behind the scenes love-
And Elijah embodies obsessive, love-bombing, all consuming and suffocating love.
Through this lens,
They both saw Sydney suffering and without consulting him (WITHOUT GIVING HIM A SAY!!!) took it upon themselves to help- but their fucked up perceptions of love lead their solutions to being… naturally… fucked up.
There’s even symbolism in the WAY they both tried to help (…had Sydney die).
Jedidiah wanted to end Sydney’s suffering. He would have Sydney die a lonely, cold, quiet death in the sterile environment of a hospital- then he’d bring him back in body, hoping that he’d return healthy again (the rose tinted memory of the old friend he loves)
Elijah wanted to end Sydney’s suffering. He would have Sydney die in a passionate roaring flame, surrounded by a crowd of feverous celebration- then he’d bring him back in spirit, hoping it’d bring him eternal peace and rest (the mirage of the deity-like figure he loves)
That is like the most blatant metaphorical representation of this whole thing imo. The mode of death represents their destructive love, and how it’s killing Sydney. Like, literally. But when it happens, they both wholeheartedly believe they’re doing this FOR Sydney, to “help” him.
AND THIS BRINGS ME TO MY OPINION ABT ELIJAHS INTENTIONS:
I’ve always interpreted Elijah as being entirely, legitimately convinced of everything he said. Like, through the lens of his own incredibly warped and distorted perception of “love”, he genuinely thought he was doing what was best for/ “helping” Sydney.
He had it in his head that he loved Sydney, none of that was a knowing lie, it was real to him— but his reality was… again, distorted.
And it’s written in a way which highlights how HORRIBLY UNHEALTHY that warped perception is. It mirrors how Jedidiah’s starkly contrasting ways are showcased as unhealthy, despite him too thinking that he was doing what was best for Sydney. Neither go excused, or sugar coated, the point being: to show how neither extreme is good.
Beyond their skewed actions,
They both wanted to resurrect a Sydney that didn’t exist. The Sydney Jedidiah wanted back had withered away,, Sydney’s sickness was more than physical, it had roots in his mind and memories. Jedidiah had left him feeling abandoned for so long that it’d take more than a simple reset to heal their rift. But he didn’t know how to do that, he didn’t know how to be close, and he was too wrapped up in his self- flagellation to actually break down the walls he’d built.
And Elijah’s version of Sydney was a total idolization. He was never self aware enough to realize he was a large contributor to Sydney’s suffering in the first place. He was too wrapped up in the thrall of his own delusions to realize how scary and confusing this all would be for Sydney. (I say delusions bc I think… they were/gen. Coming from someone who’s BPD-spawned delusions get similarly obsessive and convincing… I have a whole other tangent on this for another day)
This isn’t an Elijah apologist message btw, nor is it a Jedidiah apologist message— I just think this depth is an important part of the overall message- you can love someone and hurt them every second of it, if there’s no balance- a line between the two extremes!! I think we are seeing Jedidiah starting to find that line- he was actually listening to Sydney by the end of it all. Elijah… is still stuck in his head.
198 notes · View notes
fangirl-writes · 2 years
Text
Who Do You Love?
JJ Maybank x Fem!Reader
Warning(s): angst
Request: I NEED MORE ANGST SO WHAT ABT THE READER IS UNSURE IF JJ LOVES HER OR NOT SO SHE BREAKDOWNS IN FRONT OF HIM AND HE REASSURES HER AND FLUFF ENDING
Notes: Man JJ and angst just go together and that’s unfortunate but a happy ending is mandatory. Also Cleo’s in here but there aren’t any season 3 spoilers. I think if this situation were actually in the show, it would be way more action-y and dramatic but I wasn’t feeling that so have this instead.
Tumblr media
It wasn’t that JJ was a bad boyfriend. On the contrary, he was a better boyfriend than his circumstances would’ve led you to believe.
But lately it had been nagging at you; a year into the relationship and he hadn’t told you he loved you. Not once.
It wasn’t like you hadn’t said it. In fact, when you said it the first time, JJ looked like he was ready to break up with you on the spot.
But he didn’t and you just assumed that he wasn’t ready. You always put your whole heart to things and JJ was no different. You’re convinced he’s the one.
But now, after everything that’s happened to you guys, he still can’t say it?
John B. and Sarah got metaphorically married after not even six months in a relationship and JJ can’t tell you he loves you.
Are you that unimportant to him? Or is this just a fling to him? And breaking up with you is just something he hasn’t gotten around to yet?
It’s a stupid thought, JJ never does anything he doesn’t want to do and he’d never play with your feelings like that, but you can’t wrap your mind around why he doesn’t just tell you.
There can’t be another girl, right? That’s just silly when would he have the time-
...him and Kiara had been spending a lot of time together lately.
But her and Pope- no. That hadn’t worked out either. Was that where you and JJ were headed? To an unceremonious end that you wouldn’t talk about? You didn’t think you could be as cool with it as Pope.
Maybe that’s because you weren’t a true pogue.
Which was just as silly because you’d been friends with them since way before you and JJ became a thing. But you two were the first to break the “no macking” rule, even before Kiara kissed John B.
Oh, fuck.
First John B. and then Pope...Kiara wasn’t just making her rounds on her friends, right? Trying each of them out until one fit?
No, how could you even think that? That’s a horrible thing to think about one of your friends. But the insecure little girl inside of you was trying to come up with an explanation. One that wasn’t just “he’s not ready.”
Because why wasn’t he ready?
You tried to push these feelings down. Tried to not stare at John B. and Sarah with jealous longing, to not feel queasy inside when Kie and JJ hugged.
If anyone noticed your discomfort, they didn’t say anything. There was just so much going on, as always, and anyone’s feelings that weren’t out in the open fell to the wayside.
But, if you were being honest with yourself, it was starting to wear on you.
“Hey, pretty girl,” Cleo said, snapping her fingers in front of your face. “Why ya staring at Kiara like you wish her head would explode?”
You blinked, a blush coloring your cheeks. “What? I-I wasn’t-”
“Now, come on. Don’t lie to your auntie Cleo. What’s going on?”
You rubbed your arm, considering. Cleo might be the best person to talk to about it. She and JJ weren’t really close, so she could give a rather unbiased perspective on things. Maybe she could help.
“It’s just...you don’t think there’s anything going on between them do you?”
Your gaze was transfixed on the way Kie and JJ laughed, doing a little dance to the music playing at the wreck. 
“Them two? Nah. They bicker like siblings, but I don’ think either of them are interested like that. Besides, aren’t you and JJ an item?”
You nodded. “Yeah but lately I’ve been...kind of worried about it.”
“How so?”
You took a deep breath.
“It’s stupid, really, but JJ and I have been together for over a year now and...he hasn’t told me he loves me. Which I know is a stupid thing to be worried about but I can’t keep it from bugging me-”
“Hey, hey, slow down there,” Cleo said, coaxing you from the brink of rambling. “If it’s botherin’ you this much then it’s not stupid.”
You bit you lip, anxiety pooling in your stomach.
“For what it’s worth, JJ looks at you like your da sun. But if you’re really this worried about it, just talk to him. Either way it goes, you’ll have your answer.”
You gave her a grateful look. “Thanks for listening.”
“Anytime. We’re friends, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Good. Now go talk to yer boyfriend before someone’s head explodes.”
You laughed, feeling a little more relieved, but that anxiety returned the closer to JJ you got.
He was his beautiful self, as always; drinking a coke in board shorts and a muscle tee, sunglasses perched perfectly on his nose, and strands of blond hair falling gracefully over them.
“Hey, baby,” JJ greeted casually as you approached, putting a hand on your thigh when you stopped by his seat.
“Hey, J,” you replied, trying to keep the waver out of your voice. “Can we talk?”
His eyebrows furrowed. “Is everything all right?”
“Yeah! Yeah. I just need to talk to you about something...alone, preferably.”
You glanced around the group, who were all staring at you with curious eyes and wondering glances. You never asked JJ to “talk,” especially not alone.
“Yeah, uh, okay.”
JJ got up anyway, but you could tell by his body language that he was just as weirded out by this as the rest of the pogues (except Cleo, who gave you an encouraging nod when you glanced at her).
He reached for your hand, but you crossed your arms to sneakily avoid it and took off toward the docks. That he definitely noticed.
“Are you sure everything’s okay?” He asked, sitting himself down beside you on the dock.
“Actually, no, but also yes? Um, you’re gonna think this is stupid and I really need you not to blow up at me for it because I think I’d lose my mind if you did.”
“Y/N, what’s going on? Talk to me.”
You let him take your hand this time and squeezed it for comfort.
“I just...why haven’t you said you love me?”
JJ’s brow furrowed. “What?”
“It’s stupid, I know, but, J, why? I’ve told you I love you. I’ve told you multiple times, even just out of instinct, but you haven’t said it once.”
“I say it-”
“No. You don’t.” You snapped.
This put JJ into defense mode. “Why’s it so important to you anyway? They’re just words. Just because you say them doesn’t make them true.”
“But are they?”
“What?”
“Are they true?”
Tears were rolling down your cheeks now, unable to control your emotions when he was discounting your feelings like this.
“This is stupid,” JJ said, standing up.
That shattered you.
“So, that’s it then?” You asked, feeling your heart sinking in your chest. “You don’t love me?”
“Of course I love you, Y/N! Why the fuck would I be with you if I didn’t love you?”
“I don’t know, you tell me!” You shot back. “Because this has been bothering me for weeks and you haven’t noticed anything’s been off! You’re too busy with this stupid treasure hunt and hanging around with Kiara-”
“Is that what this is about? You’re pissed because I’m hanging out with Kie?” JJ asked, face pinching angrier with every second.
“No, that’s not what I-”
“Well, maybe I should date her! At least she wouldn’t act like this!”
“Maybe you should!”
JJ’s face fell and silence settled between you.
Tears were still falling from your eyes and you hugged yourself, regret and guilt pooling in your stomach.
“You don’t mean that,” JJ whispered.
“I don’t know,” You replied, softly.
“You don’t know what?”
You shook your head. “I just don’t know. I don’t know if I meant it. I don’t know if you love me. I don’t know if I want to be dating you any more.”
JJ looked like you felt, completely shattered. Tears were pooling in his eyes and his mouth was slightly open, like he wanted to say something but couldn’t get the words out.
“Y/N-” he started, reaching out for you.
You stepped back from him. “Just...just don’t.”
You shouldered passed him, heading up the dock.
JJ watched, frozen, as you grabbed your bicycle from where it was leaned against the Wreck’s building and biked away.
He also caught sight of his friends, who’d been watching the encounter from the balcony, and they looked to him, confused.
What just happened?
JJ wasn’t sure either. But he knew that if he didn’t do something soon, he was gonna lose the most important thing to him.
It wasn’t until the sun had gone down that JJ finally showed up at your house.
You’d been expecting him since you left without resolving anything in your fight. In fact, you’d been aching for him for that long, wishing he’d come hold you in his arms and tell you everything would be okay, like he always did. But when he was the cause of the pain, would that make it better or worse?
You were almost asleep when there was tapping on your window.
You went to it almost too quickly, opening the curtains to see JJ standing on the roof with a small bouquet of flowers in his hand and an unsure grin.
With a deep breath, you opened the window.
“Hey,” JJ said, sliding into your room as you moved out of the way.
You didn’t respond to him, just crossed your arms and waited for him to start talking, a tired frown etched on your face.
“Um...these are for you,” he said, holding out the bouquet.
They were Gaillardias. The flowers that grew in the soft sand along beach walkways. JJ always said they reminded him of you because they were bright and beautiful and thrived in the sun.
The thought warmed your heart and you felt yourself wanting to cry again.
You took the bouquet from him, “thank you.”
You put them in a small vase that was on your desk, having once held the flowers JJ got you for your birthday a few months ago and you were just too lazy to put the vase away. You were thankful for it now.
“So,” he started, taking a seat on your bed. “Can we talk about our fight?”
You shrugged. “I guess we have to, right?”
JJ nodded as you sat next to him.
“I’m sorry for bringing it up,” You said, avoiding looking at him. “I knew it was stupid and I still brought it up. I just wanted to know...”
“It wasn’t stupid,” JJ replied, also not looking at you. “I’m sorry for saying it was.”
“Would you tell me why?” You asked.
“I-” JJ sighed, turning sideways and pulling you along with him so that the two of you were facing each other.
You wrinkled your nose. “JJ your shoes are all sandy-”
“I’ll take them off,” he said, quickly pulling his sneakers off his feet and dropping them on the floor, making sure to wipe away the sand before taking a deep breath and continuing. “I can’t say I love you because I really do. It’s hard for me to say because everyone I’ve loved before have left me. My mom’s gone, I loved my dad just as much as I hated him, Big John’s gone, I thought I lost John B.”
JJ hung his head, stopping to take a breath. “I guess I’m just scared that I’ll lose you, too,”
You chuckled a little. “You know, it’s funny, I wanted you to tell me you love me because I didn’t want to lose you. I thought that if you weren’t saying it, that meant that this wasn’t something you were invested in.”
“I’ve never been more invested in anything in my life,” JJ admitted.
You smiled. “I guess that’s all I need.”
“No,” JJ shook his head. “No, this time I’m going to say it. I love you, Y/N.”
You felt like crying all over again. “I love you, too,”
JJ took your face in his hands and pressed his lips to yours. A gesture you returned, putting your hands on his chest and gripping his grey t-shirt tightly.
A thunk hit your window, causing the two of you to pull apart and turn your attention towards it.
“Oh, yeah,” JJ said, getting up and sticking his head out of the window. “We’re good, guys!”
Confused, you joined JJ at the window.
The twinkie was sitting in your driveway, passenger and side door open, with the rest of the pogues around it.
“Good,” John B. said. “We were starting to think she killed you.”
“Not yet, he’s still worth keeping around,” you said, jokingly.
“You guys coming down? We’re gonna go have a bonfire now.”
JJ smirked. “Nah, I think we’ve got some more apologizing to do, if you know what I mean.”
“JJ!” You said, shoving his shoulder and blushing furiously.
“Be safe!” Pope said.
“Use protection!” Kiara said.
“Don’t do anythin’ I wouldn’t do!” Cleo chimed in.
“I hate you all!” You said, disappearing back into your room.
JJ laughed, leaning back in and closing the window.
“Now,” he said. “Where were we?”
“I’d really like to start at ‘I love you’,” you said, smiling bashfully, sitting back on your bed.
JJ leaned forward on his hands that were on either side of you. “Well, then I love you,”
You were giddy inside. “Alright, let’s do this.”
JJ laughed as your wrapped your arms around his neck and leaned backwards on the bed, taking him with you.
Yeah, maybe love doesn’t only have to be said in words, but it’s nice to hear. And JJ would say it indefinitely more times, if only to see the smile it brought to your face.
695 notes · View notes
candy-red-river · 2 months
Text
WARNING!! ATTENTION TO ALL RANFREN FANS.
RECENTLY THERE HAVE BEEN 3 INDIVIDUALS IN THE COMMUNITY THAT HAVE BEEN CAUSING SEVERE DISTRESS TO THOSE AROUND THEM. WHEN YOU SEE THESE INDIVIDUALS BLOCK, REPORT, OR AVOID THEM.
I REPEAT DO NOT GO AFTER THEM OR HARASS THEM FOR THE SAKE OF EVERYONE INVOLVED.
BELOW ARE SEVERAL COPIED TESTIMONIALS FROM DIFFERENT PEOPLE WHO USED TO INTERACT WITH THESE THREE PROVIDED WITH SCREENSHOTS.
THE DIFFERENT INDIVIDUALS WILL REMAIN ANONYMOUS AND DIFFERENT PEOPLE WILL BE REFERRED TO AS DIFFERENT COLORS FOR THEIR OWN SAKE. TAKE THIS AS YOU WILL.
🚨🚨 IMPORTANT ALARM 🚨🚨
ATTENTION, RANFREN COMMUNITY ON TUMBLR! PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THESE IMPORTANT ALERTS ABOUT INDIVIDUALS TO AVOID:
KITTYGIRLCARPET (carpetkittie) RATMISCHEFINPROCESS SEBASTIANTHEHUMAN.
FOR THE SAFETY OF OUR COMMUNITY, PLEASE BE VIGILANT AND TAKE CARE IN WHO YOU INTERACT WITH ONLINE. STAY SAFE AND PROTECT YOURSELVES! ⚠️📢
I will add the reasons why in the following…
First and foremost, I want you to be aware that several individuals have been persistently targeting me for absolutely ridiculous reasons!!!! Despite not doing anything to provoke them, they've been quite unkind and even extend their hostility to others within the fandom. This is why I've been noticeably inactive lately, as a result of their relentless attacks!!!
Starting off with Sebastian, during our former friendship he would often purposeful endanger himself even when his friends would tell him not to. For hours. He'd say he wouldn't do it but would go claim to do that thing anyway. He would also talk heavily sexually when I and him were with other friends despite being 14 (he told me and someone else he was 15) his made me, as an older teen and new adult, VERY uncomfortable. I tried to ignore it and laugh it off.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
He would repeatedly lie to us about everything, and played coy whenever we were suspicious. Recently he admitted to harrassing us in private via tumblrs anonymous asks. After we realised what he'd done he had threatened suicide on his instagram, and would immediately go back to using discord the next day.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Sebastian has been spreading lies abt his ex under the age of 13, while he is 14, calling them a groomer and such, a manipulator, spreading their personal vents/rants without permission, etc. Those were all lies, his ex was doing nothing he said. Even when his ex’s status on disc had nothing to do with love or relationships, Sebastian would change his status to pretend he had a boyfriend, to quote on quote, ‘make them jealous’. Sebastian has been obsessing over (censored), going as far to harass his friends, carve his name into his chest and show him, lie abt his age to get closer, then play the victim once confronted. Randal would give Sebastian compliments, which Sebastian would take way out of context, often making lewd and inappropriate comments in response unprompted. He exaggerates Randal’s words, making it seem that they were genuinely flirting or in love. While joking flirting was not unheard of, they were not genuine feelings. Randal had stated several times that he had no romantic/sexual/etc feelings towards Sebastian in any way. When Randal confronted Sebastian, mainly his only responses were “I don’t know what you’re talking about”, no apology, nothing, just feigning innocence. Along with those two things, Sebastian has been sharing his friends personal info, as well as publicly suicide baiting on Instagram stories. He has been saying multiple times that he has “been shoved into a hospital” and/or “actually killing himself tonight”. A final thing he did quite often was make many comments about how “Incel’s are hot” or that he was purposefully going to get groomed, most definitely for sympathy and attention. Also for attention, he would act overly sexual, making random sexual comments unprompted. He is a manipulative liar, he never defends himself, because he can't.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Before reading this, please know I have really bad memory, so I might have skipped over or watered down things Sebastian did, so please bare with me,
Back when I was 12, Sebastian had groomed me for months when him and I dated (and he now refuses it despite me having proof), he also was racist and tries to defend himself over it by saying "it was a dream" which doesnt make things any better. He also frequently spoke about sexual topics and even sent me a list of things he was into despite me telling him I didn't like talking about that stuff considering my age, also considering the fact I was recovering from something disgusting my stepdad did to me a few days prior, which I told him about. He also had shared stuff about my personal life (my hypersexuality, intrusive thoughts, vents, and probably more things I'm not aware of.)
When I broke up with him for the first time because our age gap made me slightly uncomfortable considering I wasn't considered a teen, also because he made me feel like shit and he was already a horrible person for things he did that I explaiend above. Afterwards he made hints that he would be killing himself, he also obsessed HEAVILY over me and manipulated me until we dated again. This time, he treated me as if I was some sort of secret which made me feel horrible because he KNEW our relationship would be heavily frowned upon for two reasons, one being that hes 14, i was 12. and two, people hated his guts and i promised those people I wouldn't go back to him.
He did a lot of things on calls that I can't provide proof for because I'm 99% sure he was taking precautions just in case I left him again. I WILL be mentioning it but they'll just be considered allegations as I can't provide proper proof. We broke up a final time after a month because he kept ignoring me for hours and made me feel like shit because he met new people and I suddenly became irrelevant.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
He also liked to make fun of my overuse on painkillers, and constantly called me a "druggie" which only made things worse on my end. He also never shut up about me claiming I ruined his life, I manipulated him, and he was the victim despite me getting groomed by him.
He made me isolate myself from all my friends (irl and online) so he could be the only one in my life, he did this subtly by saying "I don't like your friends blah blah blah" and gaslighted me into believing I hate them. He also liked to flaunt what he did to me because he got away with it, he also admitted he didnt feel sorry for a single thing he did to me. For whatever reason he also faked having a boyfriend to try and make me jealous (which never worked.)
I'm sure theres a lot more things he did, but I'm having a hard time remembering
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I have things about Sebastian and it’s just him sending me a mean anonymous question + him telling me about how Randal thinks that he’s the one sending mean anonymous questions so I can write a message about that ? But I’d also like to stay anonymous because I don’t want to be associated with that,, ( ;´ - `;)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The next person to be spoken of is kitty carpet.
The person who kins kitty carpet has been an on and off bother for me and my friends for months now. She would occasionally come up again to insinuate drama, going after my friend and people adjacent to him online. She has also been dating and interacting with people way too young for those such as cherrycon. She gets angry at proshippers but is a self proclaimed "necrophile", who loves talking about how writing dark content is ok while being against it making her morals unclear.
Kitty has a contentious reputation. She inserted herself into a drama not involving her aggressively harassed someone for no reason, causing them to delete their Tumblr account. She's dated a younger person, age 14 while being 17, and spreads malicious rumors about those who reject her advances. Not only did she label a 13 year old as her “master,” but she also resorted to misogynistic name calling a friend of mine.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
My experience with Kitty is pretty limited because when I was active in the Ranfren fandom she had me blocked. Not exactly sure why since I had never interacted with her once. Her ex-boyfriend (I forgot his name but his URL was 'Rabiesivory' I think at the time) and I were mutuals. When he had first followed me, I had "MINORS DNI" in both my bio and pinned post. Since he followed me and was reblogging content marked with the "18+ content filter" I had assumed he was of age (he probably lied about his age while registering so he could have access to 18+ posts). I later found out that he was a minor (14 years old), and I ended up blocking him due to this. I was unaware that he was a child because he was not forthcoming with his age. Later on, someone had informed me that Kitty had just turned 17/18 (I forget which one it was but IIRC she is actually 18 IRL) and was still dating this 14 year old boy. My main issue with Kitty is that she is a massive hypocrite and tries to constantly manufacture drama. She has accused me of things I did not do, and has tried to send her friends and followers to harass me. She also is a self-identified necrophile, and has posted about supporting illegal/immoral paraphilias & being a proshipper while simultaneously saying she "hates proshippers" and "doesn't want them to interact with [her]". She has also repeatedly made romantic advances towards non-consenting people. Kitty is a very dangerous person in the fandom, mostly because of her hypocritical nature & her insatiable thirst for drama. I would recommend avoiding her and people she associates with, because from my own experiences she will try to start drama with anyone and everyone over small, irrelevant things. She is also not above lying about things to make others look bad. I especially want to warn any minors in the fandom of her behavior since she is a known groomer and potential abuser.
Tumblr media
This section was short, however most of the people above have the same problem with her.
Final one is Michael, this is the shortest section as most people don't know him very well.
My experience with Michael
Michael who was once a friend of my friend or is still a friend, I’m not sure…consistently harassed me and spoke poorly about me. He repeatedly called me a derogatory term because I wasn't online for a day. Even after my friend forgave me he refused to move past the situation, even though it wasn't a serious issue. He has connections with a lot of problematic individuals involved in the entire situation.
Well for starters He seems to enjoy mentioning how my parents like him better than me a lot, for no reason either, its something he likes to brag about a lot which has always annoyed me. In his pinned post where it says he has untreated bpd is a lie, he’s never gotten a diagnosis with bpd, he also shares things that no one needs to know, for example he’s stomped out a little toad before and wouldnt stop talking about it for a week like if it was the best thing he’s ever done.
Warning for transphobia below.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Green has informed me that minors can not be diagnosed with bpd due to puberty and hormonal changes.
I tried to get all of the relevant screenshots down, to avoid stress and harassment I will not be responding to any questions (maybe).
Please do not harass or go after anyone meantioned. Block and report.
79 notes · View notes
angelsdean · 2 years
Text
not 2 be a clown but i really Do in my heart of hearts believe that destiel was supposed to go canon more explicitly with, if not full reciprocation from dean, then at least very obvious subtextual reciprocation. and that’s why everything is so messy in the last two eps. like i think about LAMP and that whole dance sequence and the subtext was THERE. dean’s aborted confession in the trap. dean questioning what’s real and the answer being ‘we are.’ it was all THERE and building. the confession, as much as we love it, was choppy as FUCK. it was badly edited, the shots are all over the place, extreme close-ups jumping to wide shots. the goddamn shove to the wrong wall. not good cinematography. and we know a lot of dean’s reactions were cut. we pretty much figured out the ‘don’t do this cas’ was supposed to come before the ‘i love you.’ we know cas was supposed to be in the last two eps. we Know he was meant to be in the finale. and i have Never bought the “jimmy” explanation for that either. i’m sorry but that does not make sense at all and it’s 100% in my opinion a lie they told to keep fans from being even more enraged abt cas being cut from the finale. like if he was never meant to actually be there then ok fine, sucks but ok. but if cas WAS meant to be there and they CUT HIM ??? RAGE !!!! like it makes no sense to bring back jimmy for the series finale even if they wanted to go the super tragic route like....noah fence to jimmy but who tf is thinking abt jimmy novak in 2020. and esp since cas was supposedly out of the empty and had ‘helped’ rebuild heaven....he’d literally be there !! people lie ok and they lied abt that jimmy ending lmao. esp after misha said there was ‘another ending’ where cas is in the roadhouse with dean and it’s in sam’s pov meaning years after dean died, meaning they’ve been in heaven together a long time at this point. anyways, my third eye is open and i’ve Seen the truth and i Know the real ending (which still would not have been great at all bc they’d be DEAD) involved dean and cas together at the roadhouse (i saw you funko pops) being no-so-subtextually flirty and sam showing up and kansas the band plays while deancas play footsies at the bar. but the see-double-yew killed it bc they suck and hate love. but i SAW it. i know it’s real. apollo prophecy ball hit me. 
1K notes · View notes
l0stfoster · 4 days
Note
Hey its paul anon again (thanks for the name 🫡) sorry ive been bombarding you with questions but I absolutely love this au and i love everyone to bits
So, can you go into more detail about darry and paul . Like, as much info abt them as you can throw at me those two are my boys . Like how did they officially get together , how did Paul go abt moving in and whats that situation like .
Also, when Paul is like kicked out and cut off from the family, does he end up just,, losing everything? I mean like, did his parents even let him get his belongings or did all he have was the clothes on his body and trauma. I would imagine his parents had control over his bank account too so they like shut that down too so he’s out here broke as fuck JHSJSHSJ sorry im just yapping
Anon never apologizes for asking I'm so open to answering them bc I love this au and I adore that so many people like it too. Parry fans are eating good bc the writers love Cursed!Parry just as much. I'll answer your questions ab them before I yap. To be totally honest, those two did not ever really make it official. Doing that requires two things they lack; emotional openness and no internalized homophobia. They both told themselves for the longest time that it wasn't a relationship... even after they started saying "I love you" in Latin and Fae respectively (Paul knows Latin bc spells, Darry knows Fae for obvious reasons), or when each other realized managed to figure out WHAT the other was saying,, or when they started sharing a bed and waking up intertwined,,, or when they started using far too affectionate pet names,,, or when things became far too intimate for it to be casual. They never actually make it official, one day they just slip into calling each other their boyfriends. The most official it ever got was when they flat out went "Oh yeah, we're dating" to the gang. The gang was making bets on that, by the way. Pony said weeks, Soda said a month, Steve said two, Two-Bit said a year. Ace got it right down to the date and time, nobody knows how she did it. They have no anniversary because they have no fucking idea when they really "got together". Paul never truly moved in either, he kinda just went from crashing there whenever his car wasn't an option, to taking up the couch almost every night, to sleeping in Darry's room, and eventually, it was just an unspoken thing that he was officially a member of the household. They have to kick him out for the day whenever the social worker comes to check on things, cause Darry can NOT take the risk of some kind of bad outcome to his mere existence. OK MORE GENERAL PARRY - Being with Paul reminds Darry that he's only 20 and still allowed to be something other than "the adult" sometimes. That brings a whole KIND of happiness that he can't describe. Dude's tail is fucked up due to physical trauma but that bitch wags so fast with Paul. - Darry on the other hand just generally grounds Paul. He's so used to the way of life that was on the west side that everything going on there is overwhelming sometimes. - They're very bad with vocal I love you's in English but they will say that shit ALL the time in different languages or through their actions. - Uh after Paul got jumped and had his letterman jacket stolen, Darry gave him an old denim jacket of his own bc Paul hated having his arms out in the open. - Pony audibly gags every time they're lovey-dovey. He's not homophobic unless you're Paul and Darry. - They'd shotgun cigarettes when they were younger (and the only reason they don't anymore is the account of Darry wanting to keep the fact that he smokes every rare occurrence on the down low) - Darry's purring has healing properties like a cat's purr (all of the brothers' have it actually) so this mf will just drag Paul down to cuddle and purr. - They are.. so down bad for each other. Darry does anything and Paul swoons, and they've def had an interaction that goes something like this: Paul, knowing Darry cant lie: "How do you feel about me right now?" Darry, immediately: "I'd marry you if I could." Paul & Darry:
Tumblr media
As for being kicked out, Paul's parents quite literally just. Booted him, barely a warning. One minute he's arguing back for the first time since their keeping up appearances at the police event, and the next he's being dragged by the arm and shoved out of the house with threats of being killed if he dares to show his face back there. Just like that, all of it's pretty much gone; save for the clothes on his back and whatever he'd been carrying-- which was really only his car keys and his wallet. He was sleeping in his car for a bit until Two and Pony vaguely got on his ass because Darry's calls were going to voicemail and he was stupid enough to let it slip that he wasn't living at home anymore. Pony, being Pony, snitched. Can't have shit with that little gremlin around- so after finding his dumbass after having had the equivalent of an aneurism over suddenly being ghosted by Paul, Darry extended the offer for Paul to stay with them. He doesn't mind it being a permanent solution, but Paul is.. less fond for a few reasons; so he tries not to impose much while he looks for work. (He does eventually get something sorted out, so yippie! Helps with the bills what a guy) FORGOT TO ADD. He sneaks home at one point to try and get some of his shit because he knows where the spare key is, but gets cold feet at the door because he genuinely doesn't know if his dad will keep up with that threat.
32 notes · View notes
throwaway-yandere · 8 months
Note
hello, hello! i wanted to drop by to say that your kaveh + dr ratio fic was amazing. i only finished reading it just now, so excuse me if i sound like i consumed excessive sugar but anyway— i adore the way you played around with the concept of "expy"!! at the start of the fic, i already know that something was gonna tie both ratio and kaveh together (although i don't think we were made aware of ratio's intentions at first besides hints here and there??) but man, reading it till the end filled me with catharsis. it felt so good, everything was so neatly tied and weaved together. you did such a marvelous job. also, one of my favorite parts about the fic were the flashbacks veritas had about him and his (y/n). i think those were crucial in giving us a solidified view about the relationship between them and not to mention, the little 'lie' he did. ANDDD OH OH i loved the way you wrote kaveh's dialogue when he first saw his delam awake. something about how he stuttered/mumbled (?) in such relief made me feel like i could feel his relief myself. this may be because you introduced his despair over our loss so well somewhere in the beginning, so thank you for that!!! or really, thank you for writing this delicious fic in general.
anywho, i think i've said far too much on here but i just had to— wishing you a good day/evening! AND SORRY FOR THE RAMBLE.
[From this Yandere!Kaveh &/vs Yandere!Dr. Ratio x Reader]
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Kaveh: What lie were they talking about?
Veritas: Nothing. Do not mind them.
Kaveh: If it's pertaining to (Y/n), I find that request difficult to follow.
[Author's notes utc]
Aight my turn to speak now HAJDJAIDIIW— DW DW I LOVE IT A LOT WHEN PEOPLE RAMBLE ABT MY FICS AAAHHHHHH TY TY TY!!!!!
Yeah it was meant not to be explicitly stated in the beginning what Ratio was up to (≡^∇^≡)!!! I just thought it'd be a nice "plot twist" when it's revealed Veritas also has a (Y/n) [although it's prolly obvs it was leading up to that haha].
His lie is actually pretty solid too. No one can deny or verify those claims. Not when he did leave those notes on (Y/n)'s computer [those quick little "Good morning, I love you. — R." messages he put in by hacking lol]. Not when he can say they were hiding their relationship. Doesn't help that his (L/n)'s colleagues can provide testimonies that they did use to be close enough to exchange jackets.
If Kaveh found out it's a lie there's no way in hell he'd allow Veritas to share you.
Speaking of our boy, Kaveh's parts are fun to write too. He nearly made me make the fic more sadder but my goal for these next fics is to be more lighthearted with a "willing"/compliant darling 😭😭😭 I love our boy very much. He doesn't have any will to go on but now he has something to get excited about and wake up for with you being here.
Aight I'll shut up now HAJSJAIISOQKA Ty ty ty (≧∇≦)/!!!!!
103 notes · View notes
galedekarios · 2 months
Text
seeing @mercymaker's own post about the "apology" made me feel confident enough to air my own feelings about it now that i have had a night to think it over and not internalise it anymore.
i'm not going to further belabour the point again how this "apology" is not an apology at all, but a statement where he doubles down on everything, omitting important facts, twisting truths, dancing around the issue at heart, and so much more.
it's frankly exhausting at this point.
i want to address one thing specifically however since he thought it was prudent to dedicate an entire paragraph to it in his "apology".
the fact that he wrote this:
"Truthfully I am not sure when or if I’ll begin creating again but I will continue to ask for permission to credit/use someone’s works if I feel like I’m inspired like I honestly had been doing following the late March situation. I do not expect any forgiveness or positive reactions to come out of this tbh, I just know an apology was warranted and deserved. This time I’m actually taking a step back to evaluate it."
after he just said this:
"To one gifset in particular, the hands set, that gifset was honestly a pure coincidence/accident. I truthfully had no idea that the blog had done something similar first. Hands are a common theme in Gales romance that I picked up on and I had no idea a similar set was done prior. I can say this about other sets too but it was this one in particular that I can honestly say was an honest coincidence/accident. And I couldn’t have known that those scenes/themes bore any special significance to that blog. Also I want to acknowledge I was never seeking “mutualship” but more so I enjoyed them as a creator and most likely had tumblr technical issues. I’m sorry if my actions ever made you feel unsafe, that’s the last thing I’d want to make someone feel :/"
it's just... absolutely vile to me.
first off, i have to ask: which is it? are you "apologising" or are you still trying to pretend that the concepts gifs i created and you stole are "common" things that you "picked up on" and "had no idea a similar set was done prior", which you could "say about other sets too"?
i'm confused at this point...
i'm being facetious here. i'm not. he's not sorry. he's sorry he got caught. again. and that, this time, it reached other parts of the fandom that it previously didn't, where he couldn't lie anymore about how all of this is just a case of people bullying him, of people being exclusive and clique-y.
i don't understand why he singled that set out in his "apology", however, other than that he must know by at this point that it's the one gifset that most upset me. not only because he stole it twice, but because it is so meaningful to me.
so... let's look at the facts here:
he followed me from early on, ever since my blog got traction in the bg3 fandom after the full release of the game
he engaged with me via messages and comments at around this time
there was no talk abt this theme specifically in relation to gale until after my meta and gifset gained traction, despite being a set containing an original character, which generally does worse in terms of engagement
he stole several other of my concept gifsets that i posted around this period in time (gale + missing waterdeep, gale + saying i love you, gale of waterdeep vs gale dekarios, one of my oc compilation sets)
he contacted me to remake a gifset in particular that was an older set as well, just like the hands set
i showed side by comparisons in my original post (same scenes, same frames, same framing, same caption) and it was so blatant to the point of where several people reached out to me, confused if the copy is actually my set or reblogging it, thinking it was mine
i think it's pretty obvious what actually happened, considering the context and, to be honest, at this point i don't think even he believes his own lies anymore.
all i can say is that this was not about apologising - none of this was - it was about trying to save face and doubling down.
33 notes · View notes
aquickstart · 9 months
Note
pls may i have some saltburn takes. i saw u liked my post abt oliver never having read the reading list and it made me giggle.
OH YES DUDE oh i Loved that post because it brings up actually something that for some reason i haven't seen discussed much. oliver's unreliable narration.
i have a brilliant, i think, genius four-question plan for making people understand saltburn, and it has worked before and i will maybe elaborate on it, but not right now. right now i'll talk about one of the questions.
who is oliver telling this story to, and why?
we've established that he's an unreliable narrator at least because it's the logical conclusion for a movie shot in a way that opens and closes with his narrative. but what does oliver being untruthful actually mean for what we know about anything and everything that happened. have you ever obsessed over this particular question. well. i have.
my hot take, first of all, is that oliver is not that smart. he's clever, but the point of the movie is that he's caught up in and driven by desire; desire, pointedly, in the moment, merging desire, adapting to circumstance and leading him on. his want is not concrete from the beginning. his want is insatiable hunger that grows.
so, okay, from the top. the whole meet-cute with felix? because of a punctured tire? eh. idk if that's true. the money thing at the bar, pretending to not have any while he actually did? eh, perhaps. chronologically he then lies to felix about his dad, and this is big, this is deliberate, this is what ties felix to him for good.
what if the first two instances were coincidences? like, felix genuinely in trouble then, oliver genuinely out of cash. makes sense to become attached and actually do something, something impulsive, drastic, when felix seems to be drifting away, and lie about his dad.
interjection: you might be saying, nadia, he lied about his family from the get-go. well of course. i didn't say he's not smart enough to clock what image of a damsel in distress felix would gobble up. i'm saying he didn't do it for the long game, because there was no long game to speak of, as narrator-oliver would have you believe. i think he wanted felix so badly in that moment of several months in oxford, i think he was so blinded that he would've said anything. and he did.
now, i've briefly talked about oliver's feelings about the invitation to saltburn, and i think this is very important here. in the moment, he couldn't possibly know what exactly this invitation could mean, in the long run, only that it is definitely the next step in progression of desire for felix. present-day oliver interjection, and i believed him, after felix said he could leave anytime, i read as a slip up, an admission that oliver didn't plan shit, or at least from the beginning he didn't. it lured him in as soon as he got there, gothic house driving mad-style. he held on to a dream of something elusive (felix as a friend? lover? forever-partner in whatever capacity? i want him so bad i don't care what he is as long as he's there? please? please?).
the other obvious hole to poke at is in the end. venetia very conveniently takes the razors he places for her, and while sure, it could be read as him just hinting at how he conveniently read her fragile state and took advantage of it, i don't buy it. (i'm honestly even tempted to suggest he met elspeth on accident, to then spin a pretty story for his own sake, but him keeping tabs on the surviving cattons all those years tracks with what we know about obsessive oliver; he's definitely known about her flat for a while.)
but those are all minor stuff. i get completely if you think i'm reading too much into it and this is all just a headcanon after all, to be fair. BUT. but.
my second big take is that oliver was/is madly in love with felix. i know, shocking. but you have probably seen people say he wasn't. i will elaborate.
i wasn't in love with him. i loved him. i hated him. what does this sound like. have you ever had a friend come to you after a breakup fuming and telling you how they'll never end up with this asshole for sure and then get back together with him and then break up and say the same thing again.
i loved him, but i wasn't in love with him. i know everyone thought i was, but i wasn't. have you never told anyone something of the sort, specifically the last part, to emphasize just how it's everyone around you that's kinda hung up on whatever it is, and you've moved way past it, actually. have you never told yourself that.
i have. i know many other people who have, too. so, who is oliver telling this story to, and why? there's no one but dead elspeth in front of him. there's no one but himself. fun fact: each time you recall an event, it distorts under the influence of the mix of past and present emotions. each time you recall, you mold memory (source, e.g., x). the way i personally see it, oliver, for whatever reason, retells the story in order to solidify his own memory of it in the way that he wants to remember it. whatever he says, this is his final word, and this is his final truth.
this is also why details slip through, like my beloved i believed him, like the emotional i hated him growing into self-convincing, misleadingly dismissive, definitely unsure i hated him by the end. those are the true emotions that he recalls, those are the times that are hard to rewrite, for whatever reason.
of course, he hated them all. but before that, he loved felix to the point of blindly following where felix's desire led oliver, at least the way oliver perceived felix's desire. it failed, crucially, when felix's desire brought them to the center of the labyrinth, where oliver could not be the desired anymore.
my third hot take in connection to this is that oliver did not know he would kill felix until the very night he did it. he didn't know it, i think, until the last hour, until felix refused to reconcile completely, until he made his blood run cold. i also briefly mention it here, specifically how farleigh is tragically connected to felix's death, in my opinion. this tracks with, again, my strong belief that oliver lies, lies and lies throughout this whole story about wanting to take everything from felix from the beginning; no, he fucking didn't. he wanted felix. he wanted felix to be his. that was number one priority. he wanted felix and whatever else came with it, undoubtedly, but not the other way around.
paradoxically, he also wanted to be felix; he wanted to be him and be with him just as us tumblr people can often relate and the tragedy is that you always have to choose. felix pushed him away, so there was no other choice but to take what was left of felix that oliver could take. hence the clothes wearing, the table scene talk, the refusal to leave.
felix chose not to choose oliver, so oliver became felix. it's his fault. felix promised oliver could leave. felix left instead. what was oliver to do.
but to your point about the books, i think it could be either way, actually. i think he could have lied about it because technically that's also in character for him, he was performing for an audience of his tutor. but i also think that he was, genuinely, a nerd before he came to oxford, and he didn't, and still doesn't, have any friends, and he hates his sisters and his mother and is miserable. he's the perfect profile of someone who'd read king james' bible over the summer, and then some, imma be honest.
so, yes. i think oliver lies about most things in saltburn and i think he's pathetic, lost, confused, grieving, angry, horny, down bad and in denial. and i fucking love him. i so fuckin do.
57 notes · View notes
2knightt · 1 year
Note
i LOVED the darry x motherly!reader and i’d love to know more about the relationship that ponyboy and johnny have with reader
PB.C and J.C x motherly!reader
!warnings!
1.fem!reader
2.platonic fic
3.darry x reader is said through out the fic!
4.minor mentions of abuse and violence.
Tumblr media
dude?? they literally love you so much???
they are so thankful for you. like actually, they think you were sent from heaven.
ponyboy looks up to you so much oh my god.
he tells you EVERYTHING and when he goes out with you he follows you EVERYWHERE
he is like a lost puppy.
“where are we going y/n?”
“well, *i* was going to get groceries for your house.”
“oh! can i get a snack while we’re there?”
“..yeah sure pony. as long as you eat.”
when walking around the store with him he’s holding the bottom of your shirt because he’s scared ‘you’ll get lost.’
he’s the one that always gets lost.
he forces you to read to him when he’s tired.
he just does!! he puts those puppy eyes to good use fr.
and you fall for it every time. you know why?? cuz you see him like a little brother or a son.
i know you do. it isn’t good to lie to the author.
you will do anything for him and you believe he can do NO WRONG.
when he ran away?
“darry, he’s just a kid. he was scared, c’mon. give ponyboy a break.”
if he jumped someone?
“hey, at least we know you’re strong now! good job!”
if he killed someone??
“oh, he’s just being silly. tell them you didn’t mean it ponyboy.”
“i ain’t mean to shoot the guy 12 times.”
back to the topic of him telling you everything!!
he told you abt his lil crush on cherry valance and you felt like a proud mother.
“yea…she’s just a real looker.”
“AHHHHHH!!!—i mean, that’s so great ponyboy.”
he’s so embarrassed when you ask for updates about her.
I MENTIONED IN THE OTHER FIC THAT HE CALLS YOU MA IN PRIVATE SO..
when you stop reading he’ll go,
“why’d you stop reading, ma?”
or if you need help carrying in groceries he’ll say, “do you need any help ma?” in a quiet voice so the gang doesn’t hear him.
normalize giving ponyboy beat hugs!!! he loves them!!! but he gets embarrassed!!!
johnny is your biggest fan ever.
EVER.
he talks to you about everything.
“y/n, did i tell you about the ladybug i saw today?”
“yeah johnny, you did.”
“oh…well did i tell you about the grease i saw getting arrested?”
“pardon me johnnycakes?”
he rants to you about everything and anything.
and you just listen while you rub his back with your hand.
when his mom yells at him, he rushes to see you.
and your heart just hurts when you see him cry about that.
but he’s so glad that you’re there to help him, to give him the motherly love he needs.
he isn’t big on showing you physical affection, but he will give you gifts.
he steals pretty flowers for you, he’ll give you cigarettes if you smoke, and he’ll even steal a few things for you.
he will cry if you bake him treats.
he loves homemade goods, so if you make him some cookies he will tear up and say thank you.
even though johnny ain’t very intimidating compared to your boyfriend, he still tries.
if he’s with you and some guy tries to hit on you he shows up outta no where and just goes,
“aye! you know she got a boyfriend right? he’s real tuff, so don’t try anything funny.”
“yea? is that supposed to be you?”
“na, darry curtis!”
the mfs apologizing and scurrying away in fear.
nobody wants that smoke from darry😭😭
for mothers day ponyboy and johnny get together to write you a cute little card, separate from the gangs card.
johnny has one side of the card while ponyboy has the other.
“dear y/n, this is johnny. i just want to say, happy mothers day. i ain’t very well off with my words but, i hope you can understand. i want to thank you, i know i don’t do it often but..i hope you know i’m thankful. for everything and anything you do. if you and darry didn’t meet, i think i would’ve lost my mind. so uh, again, happy mothers day. keepin’ this short and sweet.”
“dear y/n, happy mothers day! me and johnny are making a separate card from the gang because…they aren’t…civil in anyway. like what johnny said, i want you to know im thankful for you. these past few months were tough, but you made them bare able. you know what situation im talking about by now, don’t you? but, thank you. i’m forever grateful for you y/n. im glad darry found you.”
author notes ;
1.thought it was fitting for mothers day since it’s tomorrow <3
2.maybe ooc LOLLL
3.thank you sweetheart for the compliment <3
Tumblr media
may 13th, 2023. 5:26
332 notes · View notes
prince-liest · 6 months
Note
oh my god…. prince……. you can’t do this to me. you’re saying next fic has vox getting fucked, focuses on vox’s transness (AH), AND ALSO HES ON THE OFF SEE SAW OF HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH VAL?????? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL MEE?!!?!!????? I THINK I MIGHT ACTUALLY COMBUST. and bc another anon asked abt how alastor views the violence in voxval’s relationship, i have Another thought on the matter. as much as alastor looks down on vox, they can be Very similar sometimes. they are both egomaniacs and very prideful. i don’t think vox, without outside interference, would ever ADMIT that the violence he faces is 1) something he truly hates AND 2) out of his control. he can’t admit he hates it, because then why isn’t he stopping it? that would be admitting to not being powerful enough or strong enough. and hello, 50’s toxic masculinity coming through, he CANT be a victim of domestic violence. he’s a powerful, rich, and important man. it all comes down to perceived weakness. so, the solution is to pretend he’s mostly fine with it. sure, he can act disgruntled and upset in the moment, but i don’t think he’d ever let himself take it seriously. because then he has to start drawing lines in the sand, and what happens then? will val look down on him? will he lose val? yeah, he is not risking that over a problem he mostly refuses to acknowledge exists. and as you said, this is all happening in the setting of hell, where ultra violence IS the norm, and vox himself is excessively violent. it’s the most delicious 50 layer cake of fucked up-ness.
RANT ASIDE THO. i have a question. 2. do you ever plan on having vox interact with the hotel crew outside of angel? ANDDDD what would charlie’s reaction be to their friendship/situationship/ kinda love affair. i think she could add SOOOOO much hilarity and Intense Emotions to this series. not that the boys haven’t been doing their part in that so far. charlie just intensifies everything she does, god bless her. -🌓
The "getting fucked" bit and the trans conversation bit are directly related to and relevant to each other, and frankly I'm just very happy to be out here writing the specific flavors of deeply queer shenanigans that I'm writing, and to have people actively enjoy that. It genuinely means a lot to me that I've strayed so goddamn far out of the bounds of good old top/bottom yaoi archetypes that introduced me to fandom and yet have a wildly enthusiastic audience nonetheless. So, that was my long way of saying that you bring me a lot of fucking joy, anon, hahaha.
As for everything you're saying about Vox, power, and masculinity: YOU! points dramatically at you YOU GET IT! YOU GET IT!!!!!! Everyone just read this, this is it, this is the thing. I have no notes to add. There is a reason that the main point he raises the moment he actually says something vulnerable about it (before he immediately cuts himself off) is a complaint that he's an overlord, so why—?
And with regards to your questions: I'm not gonna lie, my actual planning for 666 is usually, like, extremely by the seat of my pants. I plan nothing except, "Oh, shit, had an idea for the next one. Lesgoooo—" and that's been the case for literally every single installment. It's all just been evolving naturally and building on top of itself. So! I can't say that I plan to have Vox interact with the hotel crew or Charlie, but I also will never say that I'm actively opposed to it.
That said, I do think a lot of this fic is kinda structured around hitting specific topics that come up in intimate settings between Vox and Alastor specifically, with occasional tag-ins from Angel Dust, so I don't really know if there's anything in particular I'd like to write that I think would work better in this series if more characters got involved. But, hey! Never say never!
41 notes · View notes
Note
ARIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HAVE A VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION FOR YOU. HOW DID ARISUGU MEET?🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤 i am now steadily dragging everybody into this selfship playground hehehehhee ilysm<33 - @teddybeartoji
MICKEY!!!!!!!!……. welcome :3 take a seat :33 have some tea :333 🍵🍪 i’ve been Thinking abt this ask. intently. i got Way too into it btw
i think!! arisugu met in high school!! that makes most sense to me :> i transferred into his class and got attached to him …. pretty quickly probably. LMAO. i can see suguru being the one who gets assigned to show me around bc satoru Cannot be trusted w new students and shoko is a delinquent in the making…. so sugu is probably the one i meet first :3 and then i subtly imprint on him. like a duckling. a little ari following him around bc he has a soft silky voice. and he gets a bit of a soft spot eventually (me and the bad bitch i pulled by being socially incompetent <33)
WITH THAT BEING SAID…….. i see arisugu as The slowburn ever. neither of us are the love at first sight type, so i think it’d take a year or two for us to actually Fall in Love…. a year of getting to know each other on a deeper and more vulnerable level (ON THAT NOTE. late-night talks under starry skies are extremely arisugu coded)… so the feelings are very deep but. even though they’re mutual i don’t think we’d get together until a couple years have passed 😭😭 sugu would get tired of the ”chase” eventually and confess in our last year of hs maybe…. but i am Not Ready to accept his feelings. or my own. and i tell him that.
and so … he waits :’3 (WILLINGLY MIGHT I ADD i just think he’s the type of guy to say ”i’ll wait for you.” and Mean it yk….) until i eventually make the final push in like. our early twenties maybe…. which would mean about five total years of pining?? ish??? i just see it as a very tender, very very slow romance!! kinda like wading into deep water when you’re afraid of it. but by the time we get together we already know and trust each other so deeply that the change isn’t really too abrupt….. though he insists on taking everything at our own pace anyway. sniffle. i adore him (ALSO needless to say i’m not following canon here 🤨🤨 i firmly believe sugu wouldn’t have defected if he had a baby duckling following him around ok)
anyway. that’s how i picture it!! :3 i have Thoughts abt the overall dynamic but i think suguru is just… so patient. and so devoted. and i’m very loyal and also Very Shy. yepyep.
now . 😇 you didn’t ask for this but just as a comparison (<- this is a lie i just spent 2 much time thinking abt this)…. arigojo. i fear it’s a coworkers to lovers kinda deal. i’m Very Much picturing blindfolded gojo specifically and bc of his…. ways (crippling fear of intimacy + opening up) this is also another slowburn. and it ends with something a little less straightforward than arisugu bc i do Not think gojo asks me out…. it’s more of a gradual change yk?? bc labels are scary. but one day i don’t let him eat my portion of kikufuku and he goes ”how could you treat your boyfriend like this ;((” and i’m like . oh ok. so that’s what you are. we’re both losers sadly
ANYWAYYY THAT’S ALL i hope you didn’t run out of tea….. have some more just in case 🍵 as you can tell i had too much fun thinking of the Lore + all three of us are emotionally constipated (suguru too he’s just the most functional) but i hope reading it was enjoyable for youuu <33333 i love them. unfortunately.
25 notes · View notes
toytle · 5 months
Note
Hi! I love your art style it's like. Breathtaking. And your hcs on barry are some of my favourites of all time?
What do you think of "The Ballad of Barry Allen by Jim's Big Ego as an analysis of Barry's character?
are you asking or are you telling me 🤨 lol THANK YOU i put all my headcanon power into him <3
for the ballad, i love their song stress, and this isn’t bad at all as far as fansongs go. but there’s a reason i don’t include it in my barry playlist, and it’s ultimately bc it doesn’t fit my narrative haha
the song was made in 2003 and i haven’t read many comics before then, so idk how well it aligns w barry’s characterization prior to flashpoint, but i’m basing my playlist off post-flashpoint, so that’s where a lot of the differences will lie
for starters, the song only includes one half of barry’s relationship to his superspeed, and it’s important to me that a barry interpretation includes both sides of that coin. instead, it’s playing on the idea of the dark side of the hero fantasy, an inherently optimistic genre. which, fair, being a superhero sounds like a nightmare, but that angle is less novel to me when that’s the extent of the analysis (and i’m a little over the whole “i hate being a superhero” storyline in general, personally). the song is basically abt how much it would suck to have superspeed bc the world slows to a crawl and you’re left behind bc no one else can keep up w you. and it’s true, that is a very real setback! especially for someone like barry who’s already prone to self-isolation and time management issues! but what does the song actually have to say abt him as a character?
the thing is, barry isn’t a “i wish i wasn’t a hero” kind of guy. he’s a “could i be so strong [to give up the flash]? or do i love the thrill of these powers too much?” kind of guy. he’s a “knowing what i know now… if i could go back in time… maybe i would’ve been somewhere else the day lightning struck my lab and electrified those chemicals, ready and willing to forfeit a life of dodging deathtraps and battling villains… who am i kidding? there’s no going back. no do-overs. like everyone else, superheroes can only follow the path destiny has laid out for them, whatever lies ahead.” kind of guy. yes, barry is caged by his superspeed, but it would be misleading to not present it first and foremost as the very thing that frees him. it’s a double-edged sword that gives him purpose, and that freedom in obligation is what motivates him to keep going. as a wise man once said, “all you can do is go forward.” (“thanks.” “superman is pretty smart isn’t he.” “hm.”)
i think the real kicker for me was this lyric: “i’ve got time to think about the past… how my life was so exciting before i got this way.” my sincerest apologies to mr. allen, but he does not feel complete to me without his mother’s death or his father’s false imprisonment. this backstory contextualizes everything for me. his life was NOT exciting before his superspeed, it was lonely and full of escapism, either in his sci-fi/comics or his dedication to finding justice. i am of the belief that barry didn’t truly start living until he got his superspeed, over 2 decades of waiting around before he rly understood freedom and what it meant to live for himself. i get what they’re trying to do here, but this is what i mean when i say it feels like the song characterizes barry around the concept of his speed rather than how barry’s speed defines him as a person
ik i can’t expect a 4min song to include every aspect of a character’s timeline/development/nuance (esp before some of that even existed lol), but my issue isn’t that it doesn’t cover enough ground—it’s not bad that they had a theme and stuck by it, i actually love the lyrics from a speedster perspective. my issue is that i don’t think this is a good framing for barry’s character as a whole. for all his regrets and suffering, barry is optimistic to the point of denial. choosing this to be The theme to represent barry just. doesn’t feel like barry to me. it’s more like barry is the placeholder subject as an excuse to sing abt superspeed
if this was somehow less overtly a “BARRY ALLEN FANSONG” and maybe more metaphorical or even non-fandom, then it would be a dif situation and i might have dif opinions. at the end of the day, this has more to do w my pickiness than the quality of the song, and the fact that it even exists is so exciting for me as a barry allen enjoyer first, human second. but if you’re going to call smth a character study, i Will be getting my hopes up
20 notes · View notes
kevinsdsy · 3 days
Note
hi i just want you to know that i live laugh love u and 4 u. also like- when u can- u should totally tell me something abt shawn, derrick, and derek and how be their relationship cos like i love them and u gave them life. to me u r their second mother honestly. drink water :)
AHHH STOP ILY AND I’M SO GLAD YOU’VE ASKED ME TO TALK MY SHIT ABOUT THEM BC I LOVE THEM AND THINK ABOUT THESE CHARACTERS WITH ABOUT ZERO LINES TOO MUCH
anyway their relationship is sooo chaotic. like the team basically knows the three of them are dating, but people outside of the team don’t really know nor realise whatever the dynamic is so there are crazy rumours going around about them
people are convinced someone is cheating in the relationship but they cant figure out who is actually cheating bc people are convinced they’ve seen shawn kiss derek even tho he’s in a relationship with derrick but then others are convinced derrick and derek have kissed too so they can’t seem to figure out
shawn has outright told someone in his class he’s dating both but since shawn is known for his silliness they assumed it was a lie/joke which doesn’t help the situation 😭😭
and now i’m rambling a lot about a silly lil backstory even tho im sure u meant for me to talk about their dynamic so moving on SHDKDHDJ
OKAY so in my mind shawn & derek are basically always being silly, meanwhile derrick is more grounded and has a calm aura
so throughout the socmed au i had this headcanon going on where shawn sleeps A LOT and that’s still going on in my mind
so whenever shawn gets exhausted and is too tired to be energetic he lets derrick & derek chitchat while falling asleep to them talking
most of the time it’s easy for him to fall asleep bc whenever shawn isn’t jumping around and moving a lot derrick likes to play with his hair
when sharing a bed shawn is almost always in the middle (he needs attention all the time or he’ll combust in ashes)
but also he likes to give attention
he especially likes to bombard derek with a lot of kisses all over his face because derek gets shy about it
shawn & derek are soooo soft w each other meanwhile whenever shawn & derrick make out its soooo hot & desperate
on the otherhand when derek & derrick make out it’s really tender & soft too. in my mind derek just needs a lot of love and tenderness idek why he just does <3333
when it’s the three of them together tho it’s sooo different tho.
a lot of derrick watching and taking the lead w both of them and telling them what to do iyk what i mean
what who said that?
hmmm what else??
a lot of them just making fun of each other and being silly
never planning dates they just randomly find themselves on dates without actually realising it
everything they do is spontaneous— going out to eat. karaoke. hanging out outside. study dates etc etc
this is getting kind of long i feel like ?? idk ?? but these are the general ideas i have w them— when i think of more i’m sure i’ll be annoying enough to keep y’all updated SHDKDHDDN hope this was okay and what u hoped to get!!!!
8 notes · View notes
crguang · 24 days
Note
ok, so, I wasn’t sleeping bc I probably just have insomnia, possibly my depression, and also I’d just moved in to my dorm and I suck at sleeping in new places, lol, dw tho I slept for like most of the weekend and I’ve been sleeping regularly this week.
I honestly forgot that we don’t actually know wtf the stellaron hunters are actually doing , line they literally could just be lying abt everything. Actually none of them even say anything except Kafka , blade has his own thing going on, silver wolf is usually behind the scenes fucking around and firefly just didn’t say a thing , like come on, TB didn’t even think to ask anything, there was that dreamscape pass thing of whatever it’s called and the quote from 2.3 is like “Once, we dreamed of being strangers.Upon waking up, we realized we had always loved each other.” Which I assume is abt TB and firefly, and I do kind of wish we got some more stuff about TB’s past with the stellaron hunters, especially since firefly was so important, but it’s whatever. I am actually kind of interested in the script, what Elio tells them to say, and the stuff they’re just making up as they go. Especially since firefly’s script for penacony was just a few words (also firefly said she was part of the iris family the acting/performing one bc she carries out scripts). And Kafka was told was to tell TB during her interrogation abt what they’re doing on the Luofu, but I’m not sure if she’s just lying after that 😭Kafka has some explaining to do when she comes back very soon, in the main story.
hsjajsmskdmnx the arrests on the Luofu are so silly tho, especially since jing yuan pardoned her so she’s not technically wanted there anymore BUT I STILL WANT HER even tho she’s literally worth almost 11 billion by the IPC. The IPC stuff kind of bothers me tbh, they’re not the government, but also they’ve got a fair amount of authority, I feel like pardoning the stellaron hunters wouldn’t be allowed, like I don’t understand how Jing yuan did that without getting in trouble 😭 especially with the most wanted one. And topaz APPARENTLY doesn’t know who the stellaron hunters are, in her voice line abt them she said she didn’t know who they were but they had a good credit score ITS KAFKAS CREDIT SCORE SHES THE ONE W THE CARD and like it’s funny bc that means Kafka registered it under her actually name, and no one cares. Like it would’ve been funnier if she said like the wanted criminals, the ones who blah blah blah, but they have a good credit score. And jade knew exactly abt firefly and the other stellarom hunters, and even tho they’re different ranks topaz should know them. Especially considering the fact that they’re pretty infamous, ig I shouldn’t be nitpicking especially since march literally says when in Rome one time, but whatever.
sorry for ranting 😭 hope you’re doing ok!
-🌠
hope you’re doing a bit better!! insomnia is a bitch, make sure to take care of yourself as much as u can <3
i totally agree with you on the stellaron hunters not revealing anything, i dont really expect them to since we’re still quite early in the game timeline wise but it’s a bit disappointing for the TB to have gotten close to firefly and she never alluded to them knowing each other before, especially when the game’s marketing was pushing romantic implications between them😭 and the trailblazer’s “idgaf” mentality is a bit annoying because i get wanting to move forward and not wanting to be burdened by the past but not being curious at all is… weird. even march, who was repeatedly told not to look into her past, got upset about it at some point. and in the TB’s case, their connection with the stellaron hunters is actively shaping their present/future, so it’s not like they gain nothing from asking a few questions. kafka was the one who encouraged them to get some information from her when they were alone by playing truth or lie, like they don’t care😭 it’s annoying cause i wanna knowwww. a big missed opportunity with firefly imo, we could’ve gotten a pattern of learning a little bit about the trailblazer on every planet they stop by and it’d have been nice. instead all i get is trashcan and raccoon jokes like oh brother are we 8. i wonder what the script actually says, the SH says he always tells the right future but from what we know , it feels super vague. “experiencing 3 deaths” “finding the stellaron in a non-physical way” is not precise at all like how do they even carry those orders😭 no wonder they have liberty to do lots of stuff during missions, there’s barely anything in the damn script
about jing yuan, he’s general of the luofu and the xianzhou has its own regulations and criminal law, the ipc has no control over how they treat their prisoners and their bounties dont really matter to the xianzhou unless they want the money LMFAO, so the ipc has no jurisdiction to punish jing yuan for letting the SH get away. not to mention that the alliance and the ipc have trade agreements and stuff, so their relationship would be damaged and the ipc wouldnt benefit from that. at the end of the day they’re a corporation, they don’t really care for justice.
what bothers me is TOPAZ. IT MAKES NO SENSE. she’s a stoneheart in the same division as jade, sure jade is more cunning and always looking for opportunities to make profits but not knowing them at all is so ridiculous and unrealistic fr. they’ve broken into pier point like twice and that’s her place of work😭😭😭😭😭😭 no way she never heard anything about it to not form an opinion on them. i feel like giving her a voiceline about them was just for the credit score joke which also makes zero sense because why would any of them pay taxes to the corporation that wants them dead or imprisoned. how would the ipc even know which credit card is theirs and why are they doing nothing about it like its so stupid… herta froze all of silver wolf’s accounts cause she was feeling petty but youre telling me the ipc is monitoring their credit scores?.. like im not going to lie i dont take the ipc seriously at all. silver wolf was literally participating in a tournament they sponsored and they just let her compete. like that girl was on the big screen with people cheering her on… for a company that would benefits from civilians fearing/hating the SH, they really dont give a fuck. once again it lowers the stakes and makes the story less exciting for me, and in general it’s inconsistent and weird narration wise to approach heavy themes while simultaneously making a joke of everything. if that makes sense 😭 like the tonal shifts are always very harsh and out of place, it’s one of the things i hate the most about hsr. having the trailblazer crack a stupid joke when everyone’s super serious (which often gets them ignored by dan heng or makes march’s face turn unimpressed, or has her tell them now isnt the time) is starting to annoy me like we get it they’re dumb as rocks omg. when cocolia died at the end of the belobog mission and march’s first words were “well! what an adventure!” in front of bronya hello?!? having no tact in actual serious situations isnt endearing to me like u can just keep ur mouth shut atp
anyway sorry i ranted i guess i needed that off my chest HDJFKFKG
10 notes · View notes
angelsdean · 1 year
Text
the thing is, jack literally is not a toddler. like i am all for baby jack AUs and headcanons but in canon he is not a baby in an adult body. the narrative does not treat him as a toddler. they settle this debate in jack's second (2nd) episode when jack is mimicking dean (bc he imprinted on him like a baby duck) and he goes to drink a beer and they let him because he's not actually a baby despite being new to the world. it's the same as when amara is born and grows up fast. she is not still a baby when, a very short time later, she is in her fully adult form. jack is a young adult, who yes is a bit naive and learning abt the world, but it's more on par with like angels being new to the world and learning abt humanity, (like cas.)
jack is also an incredibly powerful being! he is literally thee most powerful being on earth, more powerful than any archangel, and only second in power to chuck-amara. and chuck fears him. especially when jack goes soulless. everything that happens in Moriah is because chuck is angling for them to do away with his jack-problem. he's moving the pieces on the board, fueling tfw's (yes all of them) already uneasy feelings about soulless jack and telling them thee Only way to stop jack is to kill him. chuck also establishes that he's a writer and writers lie early on in the episode. then he tells them there's no way to save jack, only kill him. that chuck's hands are tied and restoring souls is beyond his abilities (he literally created souls !! he's GOD !!). he's literally lying to them thee whole time. and it all gets revealed when sam realizes chuck IS scared of jack and that he knows where jack and dean are and that everything is going according to plan and that he's enjoying it. and then dean does something chuck doesn't expect, he doesn't go through with what chuck wants him to do! he disrupts the narrative ! he chooses free will!!! he will not kill his kid. he won't do it. he throws the gun away because he can't do it. jack, very much like dean during the michael arc, is prepared to die if it's for the greater good.
like i said before, jack mimics dean. jack loves dean. jack learned so much from dean's example. (also, an aside but. dean and jack do so much bonding off screen. just from the references to their movie watching alone-- they've watched the lost boys 36 times--it's clear they've spent a lot of time together). anyways, jack learns a lot from dean and he and dean both feel similarly re: sacrifice. jack thinks the same about sacrificing dean during the michael arc, he tells cas it doesn't matter if they can't save dean if it means ridding the world from the danger of michael. similarly, soulless jack IS a threat to the world because he is thee most powerful being in the world after god and right now he is behaving unpredictably. they are right to be afraid of him (and yes they love him, but all of tfw currently fears him.) still, despite dean and jack sharing these similar views, neither of them could follow through with killing the other when it comes down to it.
anyway, all some people want to remember abt 14x20 / jack's soulless arc is dean pointing a gun at jack / putting him in the box but literally dean cannot and does not kill jack and actively goes against god's manipulation. additionally, jack is not a baby who just made a mistake and everyone is overreacting. of course he didn't mean to kill mary, but they are not irrational for being afraid of jack, who is an extremely powerful supernatural being who currently is behaving erratically and where loss of control results in fatal consequences for others. like they are Right to want to take precautions and find a solution to protect the world from jack who at the moment is very much like a bomb that could go off on a whim. also this IS a supernatural fantasy show, like that context matters. they are not putting their literal baby in a box for, like spilling orange juice. they are trying to deal with a supernatural threat on the "dealing with supernatural threats" show. cas even suggests putting jack in the cage / binding jack. they are all afraid of him and looking for a solution until they can figure out a way to save him. and the only reason anyone starts talking about killing jack is when chuck is the one to suggest it as Thee Only Option (because again, it's what chuck wants to happen)
145 notes · View notes