#everything reminds me of them i am so ill…

[jealousmartini]

hi! i saw ur post where u mention age change with loa and could u talk more about that? cause i just turned 20, but i wanna be 17 again just so i can experience teenage things (i had depression and extreme social anxiety my whole teenagehood). i wanna feel young and do things right, apply everything i know now to this time in my life cause i can't help but feeling so old speacially since i have zero "firsts", like i'm 20 and no first crush or first kiss (ik it's not the end of the world, but i want back the expirences i was stolen from). i don't wanna over-explain myself nor trauma dump on u, but basically i just wanna start over yk? i know nothing is impossible to loa, truly know, but this one wish makss me insecure cause that will mean i was born in 2007 instead of 2004 and my old classmates werent really my classmates which is okay cause i never liked them but instead i had different ones that i don't know? i don't know if i'm making sense here, sorry to be asking u these things but ur the only person i've seen talking about age change so i'll be very thankful to anything u have to say to me. hope u have a good day :)

This ask unironically made me frown, like so hard, knowing that manifesters like you have to ask if starting over is okay because of the heavy misrepresentation and misunderstanding of manifesters and shifters who age change.

My love, OF COURSE you can. I cannot believe we have come to the point, on the interent as a whole, that people feel that they need to ask permission on what to do with THEIR LIVES, because the all high and mighty LOA police feel like they have the right to dictate what others should and shouldn't do with their lives.

And God forbid you don't obey them because then they'll throw every derogatory name, they'll diagnose you with every mental illness they want to insult you with (that they don't even understand), they'll assume that utmost worst about you, and take to their side of the community to shame you infront of them all. It's genuinely appalling.

Which is why I finally reminded myself a couple years ago that these people are not my mum. I have free will to do what I want with MY LIFE and whatever they say are nothing more than opinions that I can literally choose to listen to or to ignore. I refuse to fall into the trap of giving power, MY power away to outsiders and let them control me because real talk now, what are they actually going to do? At the end of the day they can cry, shout, rip their hair out on camera an tell me how insne I am for not having the same views as them, but none of that's stopping me from sleeping with their mum AND dad in another reality

Long story short, my answer is yes, you can start over and change the year you were born hun. You can do whatever you want because this is your call. Do what YOU want, not whatever the LOA police deems acceptable by their beliefs

[autumnslance]

FFXIV Write 2024: 21 Shade

(You can all blame @voidsentprinces and one of their posts for inspiring this one cuz I sure as heck am. Spoilers through Dawntrail.)

-

In the colorful forests of Kozama’uka, a strange movement of light green catches my eye. For a moment, I imagine.

“This one finds this forest so lively! Will these ones feast soon with the bright feathered ones again?”

It was a trick of the light on banana leaves. The shade of our little courageous one is gone again.

-

We’re still in Kozama’uka, but the roar of the waterfalls is below instead of above, and we’re trying to reach out to the bandits harassing the Potsworn.

I think of a boy with gold hair and an eager smile, no longer wearing blue. “You gave me a second chance, and I’ve never regretted it. We’ll find a way to help them, too!”

I blink, and realize the only resemblance in the bandit before me is that he’s young and blond. The shade of our foolishly brave boy is gone again.

-

I cross the bridge to Shaaloani, with its hot, dry plains rolling into the distance, eventually leading to grasslands in the northeast and craggy hills in the west, toward what was Yyasulani.

A Landsguard officer speaks an order, but in familiar tones, a comrade to his men. His voice stirs a memory, and my mind wanders again.

“We’re a long away from Quarrymill, but this reminds me in some ways of home. I bet you still hear thanks enough whenever you go back.”

I look at the soldiers laughing with each other before dispersing to their duties. The shade of our revolutionary captain is gone again.

-

The sky always seems so close in Worlar’s Echo. The Yok Huy see a few more traders these days. I’m watching the moon cross the sky when someone lights a pipe, the smoke wafting past my nose. Comfortable as I am, I’m halfway to dreaming already.

“Foolishness. We know what it is now, hardly deserving the veneration bestowed upon it for so long. And you surely have better things to do than mourn the likes of me.”

I turn to protest, but now I am fully awake and see the pelupelu merchants smoking and haggling. The shade of our spiteful witch is gone again.

-

There’s a sense of responsibility to the people afflicted with levin sickness, especially the children. I make sure that Oblivion is getting the families everything they need. I visit the first boy we met with this illness, and offer a treat of real fruit juice from the farms. It’s a good day, and he smiles as he sips, his mother smiling through her tears as he manages the straw.

“You learn to take what moments of happiness you can get. You figured out how to help the light afflicted and the tempered; this too will be defeated in time. But find the little victories where you can meanwhile.”

I look up from the boy’s bed. It’s just him, his mother, and me in the room. The shade of our fierce carer is gone again.

-

I’m still awake in the pre-dawn hours, so take a mug of mate with me to the end of the boardwalk to watch the dawn. The endless blue of the water, with the light piercing into my eyes, makes me remember a similar sight at the end and start of everything.

“There is no true challenge in this land. ‘Tis a wonder you are not bored. But you always have found meaning and pleasure in people and their small matters.”

The sun continues rising and the city wakes. The shade of my antagonistic mirror is gone again.

I finish my mate, return to my cabin, and go to bed.

-

They come and go, these ghostly memories. Some not as much as they used to, since that journey into the aetherial sea. Perhaps their aid and that last chance to say goodbye made a difference.

Maybe I am simply sentimental.

“The burden of heroes and leaders,” one of my newer ones says. “We spend all our time fighting for their lives and happiness, and feel it keenly when we fail them. Yet they helped to shape us, and so stay with us. And we strive to do better by those who come after them.”

I look up, but the shade of that heroic father is gone, the echo of his boisterous laugh ringing through his city’s streets, in his daughter’s own laughter. She waves to me now, her brother, her nephew, and our comrades with her. They are all exuberant and bright and alive, with so much possibility ahead.

I laugh as I wave to my friends.

[pixiishi]

taught myself how to draw doggos for a pair of gay lawyers 🫶

[puppyeared]

started stardew valley for the first time. born to remember villager likes and dislikes forced to immediately forget it the moment i take my eyes off thw wiki

[todayisafridaynight]

sometimes i get nishiki i really do

[lupismaris]

..

[dam-mar]

not me spontaneously crying to a tiktok with the half return audio because all i could think about was how the lawn is fucking dead since roran is mortal but eragon will endure

[biblicallyaccuratecanine]

.

[ifyourereadingthisblinktwice]

i need to stop forgetting things exist the fucking second they leave my field of vision. why is is impossible for two things to occupy my mind at once especially when im tired. like. i feel like a sim. i feel like actions are being canceled and i just. move on. and completely forget what i was doing moments before. i fucking hate it

[timeisacephalopod]

Admittedly I don't know much about the Israel Palestine war but I keep seeing news articles that refer to it as the Israel Hamas war and no it is not. After all Israel has done it gets to be referred to by it's country name and not "terrorists who kill babies and children at the speed of light" but Palestine gets reduced to Hamas?

It just leaves a bad taste in my mouth that the struggle of the Palestinian people keeps getting reduced to the existence of Hamas, but at no point does the ongoing state violence of Israel define its existence when by all means it should when my understanding is that the creation of Israel was stealing land from Palestinians. Why is Israel's violence ignored while Palestine is defined by the admittedly shit group that only arose out of decades of occupation and imperialism? Those two things are not the same and ignoring Israel's violence to act like Hamas came from nowhere just to hurt the poor Israeli government who acts like they've done nothing wrong is ridiculous to me.

[dykedragons]

i love making things for my friends!! i love it when my friends enjoy the things i make them!!!!!

[leejungchans]

i wish i was enough for people

[todayisafridaynight]

FIRST OF ALL DAIGO GAMEPLAY REAL

Second of all finished Chapter 1 <3 I watched an Xbox stream muted at 2x while skipping battles because I wanted to save the proper experience for my friend's stream and your stream but uhhhhh <3 without saying too much or setting any expectations <3 personal favorite Kiryu game no contest LOL but I figured it would be so no surprises there... I'm def taking note of how long individual chapters might take and stuff since this wasn't exactly an Optimal Playthrough but we'll get there when we get there

DAIGO GAMEPLAY REEEEEEEEEAL 🗣️🗣️🗣️ OBSESSED WITH HOW HE JUMP KICKS SON STOP THAT YOU'RE GONNA HURT YOURSELF--

but gottamn already done with chapter 1- VERY MUCH APPRECIATE MAKIN MENTAL NOTES ON CHAPTER LENGTHS if that gameplay wasnt optimal then heh 😏 i promise to be worse 😏

[kneworder]

i also think there are few things funnier than the way allen and kanda's relationship changes throughout the manga. like i do not ship them at all but for over a hundred issues it's yuu edgelord supreme kanda being like 'FUCK you for being nice and polite all the time. the world is a TERRIBLE place and it is STUPID AND NAIVE for you to pretend otherwise' and allen grin and bear it walker being like 'Actually I Believe In The Inherent Value Of Human Life You Piece Of Shit :) Be Nice To People :) Appreciate Your Friends :) Find Hope Or Go To Hell :) ' and then searching for AW hits with all the force of neah and the fourteenth and suddenly allen is like "maybe it is all meaningless actually haha i ruin everything i touch and my life was never truly mine <3 i think i might go catatonic for a little while about it wouldn't that be fun <3 go on the run and isolate myself <3" while kanda tracks him down to shake him by the shoulders like "wait wait wait fuck you oh my god stop that you need to believe in people again what about your fucking friends jesus christ don't you remember them oh my fucking god where did your stupid hope go and why do i have to be the one to force you to find it UGH." kanda fucked around and found out. literally be careful what you wish for.

[sk3l3t0n444]

heyo

[yo9urt]

another JPMD update post before i put it off again...! possibly a bit shorter this time but STILL LONG

ok i got up to the part right after waterfall cave which means MEETING TEAM SKULL SOON YAYYYYYYYYY well we already met koffing and zubat and as i noted in post 1, they sounded exactly how i thought they would, but im reaaally curious about skuntank honestly im half expecting him to just talk like a yakuza or something lol

notes:

loudred, like croagunk, uses the わっし pronoun (EDITING TO SAY: it's possible he was actually using あっし, the working man pronoun that bidoof uses, and i misread the screenshot?); loudred, like croagunk, never read as an old man to me in the english version at all so i'm really curious about that. if anything his shoutiness always made me think of him as being younger (more impetuous, impulsive, etc.)

speaking of old men, torkoal DOES talk like one based on my extremely limited knowledge of how old men talk in japanese. he speaks politely and uses a lot of archaic words/phrases/verb forms and sounds pretty grandfatherly in the japanese version, just like in the english version!

chatot continues to perplex me...he uses 私 presumably as a formality but also uses だ instead of です, and i also caught him using the ず negative of a verb which is something i see occasionally in music but have yet to learn the real implications of. it seems a bit poetic or old fashioned to me but i could be completely wrong...he also uses ぞ but jisho says that indicates command which does make sense because he's allowed to give commands and his english speech always did sound a little bossy lol

the protagonist's way of...not speaking i guess but the way they talk in their thought bubbles is really interesting. to me it reads as much simpler and simultaneously much more complex than the other characters' speech, simpler because they tend to use a lot of the same words over and over as well as relatively simple words without a lot of flair like the other characters have, but also complex because it's these same words that make me scratch my head. i can't really explain it without an example but protag's speech is just kind of confusingly simple, so simple it becomes difficult lol

partner's speech has a bit more flair and personality to it (lots of elongated vowels, usage of 僕、etc.) but is also pretty simple like protag's. i guess protag talking simply makes sense because 1. from another world & 2. they play a bit of a self-insert role so it's better to give them a more bare bones speaking style instead of forcing players to align themselves with a personality they might not feel connected to (plus, again, kids' game, and kids are not going to be throwing around big words and sentences like adults do). partner's speech being simple makes sense for a similar reason i think, makes them a little easier to connect with, sympathize with, and cheer for (as noted by me finding them EXTREMELY endearing in the previous posts)

not a dialogue note but you know how in the english version they have those berries that are fake oran berries that actually hurt you? and they named them like Oren Berry or something? in japanese, oran berries are オレン (oren) and their evil counterparts are オレソ which is SO RUDE because my katakana is really bad and i suck at those 2 characters especially 😭

also not a dialogue note but i've noticed the ingame menu text often refers to protag+partner as "(protag's name)たち” and chimecho, in dialogue with both (but primarily talking to the partner) said "(partner's name)たち" which is kind of cute but also interesting. i was wondering how 2nd person plurals were handled (and 3rd person, outside of situations like 彼ら, やつら etc.)

it's still hard and there are still MANY moments where i look at a sentence, puzzle out a few words i know, try really hard, and then go "man i have no idea what you're talking about" and press A and move on. BUT i'm having a lot of fun and i do feel that with each repeated exposure my grasp of things is getting stronger every time!!!!!!

SENTENCES I WAS PROUD OF

こんなにいきおいがあるとはおもわなかったよ ~= "i didn't think anything could even be this strong" (said by partner at the waterfall; lit. "to-this-extent force SUBJ exists COND TOPIC think-NEG-PAST NEW")

すごい！こんなおおきなほうせきみたことがない！= "wow! i've never seen treasure this big before!" (said by partner at the waterfall cave gem; lit. "amazing! like-this big-IS treasure seen-thing SUBJ exist-NEG!")

これをもってかえったらみんなびっくりするよね！= "if we bring this back, everyone will be so amazed!" (same as above; lit. "this OBJ carry-return-COND everyone surprise do.NONPAST NEW CONFIRM!")

せっかくあたらしいばしょをはっけんしたとおもったのに。。。= "even though i thought we'd worked so hard to discover a new place..." (said by partner after finding out the truth about the waterfall; lit. "with-great-pains new place OBJ discovery do.PAST QUOTE think.PAST even-though...")

actually not sure if せっかく is "with great pains" or "rare/valuable" here it could be either one...

たんけんだけじゃなくいろいろなことにやくだつのうりょくだよ！これは！= "this ability isn't just useful for exploring, it could be used for all kinds of things!" (said by partner while chatting with protag about the dimensional scream (not that they know its name yet); lit. "exploration limit/only is NEG CONN various-IS things TARGET be.useful.NONPAST ability is(copula) NEW! this TOPIC!")

easily the proudest sentence in this post