#fang jin be like >:(

[demonsfate]

i was also thinking about dj's true form. and i was thinking about how the devils all seem to have a gemstone or armor/steel theme to them. and then i was thinking about how dj has soft feathers, and how that would look if he had something like kaz's second devil form. the feather wings seem like they'd be contrasting.

but then i thought. he'd still have feathers, but they're blades. really sharp, painful blades that can slice through skin with ease should he flap his wings at somebody.

[2-dsimp]

《The smutty hitman chronicles》

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→【The Hacker: Milkies?】

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Cw: 🔞NSFW MDNI🔞Fem reader! throatpie, deep throating, praise, overstimulation, mention of lactation, breeding, and impregnation.

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『Yandere! Hacker that’s always spontaneous in everything he does. Whether it be from wrecking enemy databases or just casually trolling people online to pass the time. His unpredictable nature shines true in any setting he’s in.』

『Yandere! Hacker who’s the definition of an orange cat boyfriend. Always unhinged and in general an overly affectionate bundle of jittery joy when it comes to his loving darling.』

『Yandere! Hacker who loves everything about you from head to toe and is fascinated time and time again by your body anatomy. Reason why he’s got his hands on you 24/7 and due to his boundless obsession and curiosity. As to how you function on a daily basis being so soft and squishy compared to his lithe and hardened form. Regardless, You’re always kept on your toes whenever you’re in close quarters with the clingy fiend.』

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“Yujin, honey, are you alright? You’re spacing out again.”

『You hummed in an amused tone as you looked from beneath your lashes. To see your hacker boyfriend eyeing you with an intense glint in his sharp feline eyes that were up to no good. You jolted slightly when you felt him abruptly shove his hands down your crop top to greedily cup both of your jiggling boobs. Giving them a good hard knead.』

“Yeah, uh huh I’m fine babes it’s just—Wow! Your tits are so heavy and perky! So perfect to suck on…”

『Yujin drawled, dumbly in pure admiration as he went on to pinch and tweak at both of your nipples like they were joysticks. All the while his fleshy tip lightly dragged against your lips and chin smearing precum all over your face. As you were on your knees fondling his hairless balls and jerking off his pulsating shaft.』

“I read somewhere that mentioned how woman could lactate. Is that true? Of so, can you make that happen like right now, pretty please? I really wanna start milking you plus I’m thirsty.”

『He begged needily as he was completely fixated on your enticing mounds. Which had him utterly whipped at the thought of seeing milk dribble out those puffy areolas. That Yujin adored and revered to be the cutest thing of all. All the while he let out a throaty purr from how you started to lavish your wet tongue on his cockhead coaxing his salty sweet pre straight from the tap』

“Jin, listen I’d have to get pregnant in order to lactate. I can’t just do it at will on my own. It doesn't really work that way hon”

『You explained gently from how oblivious the 20 year old lynx hybrid sounded. Remembering how Yujin admitted that he didn’t have any definitive knowledge on the birds in the bees. Since he was raised in a very sheltered environment for most of his upbringing by strict caregivers.』

“Oh really? Well that's an easy fix! I could easily knock you up if that's what it takes baby cakes! All I gotta do is make sure to cram my spunk in every cute little hole you've got right?”

『Yujin chimed with a fanged lopsided grin and before you could even correct him with the right terminology. He suddenly thrusted his hips, forcing his thick cock deep into your mouth with each drawback of his pelvis.』

“Now that I think about it, I guess creaming your lovely throat would be good for starters~ you’d love that huh baby? I can just tell from from the way that sweet pussy is dripping all over the carpet~”

『He cooed lovingly, staring down at you while meanly squeezing your cheeks to get a close up at his dick. That was stretching open those plump lips that he fantasized kissing for all eternity. You were gripping his thighs for life support trying not to choke』

『As Yujin became Hellbent on pumping your throat full of his jizz to help fulfill his agenda. Of turning you into his lovely milk dispenser so that he’d be able to suckle on your swollen breasts. And admire his litter growing inside of your tummy for hours on end whenever he's slaving away in his room full of monitors and PCs.』

“Oh fuck, I think imma cum soon! You’re doing so good for me, so fucking good! just like I knew my pretty girl would. I swear Imma take the best care of you, make sure that my mate never goes in need of anything”

『He babbled, drooling from the tightness of your esophagus closing in on his throbbing meat. In tandem with how you squeezed his family jewels that were bloated with semen ready to make its home inside of you. And It doesn’t take long before Yujin goes completely ridgid tangling his clawed fingers in your scalp to further plant his crotch right against your face.』

『You could only process a deep hiss escaping your lover as your mouth was filled with nothing but his thick warm seed. He held your head in place and forcing you to savor every last drop of his cum that marinated your tastebuds. Yujin whined softly in protest at the thought of pulling away too soon.』

『The Hacker almost didn’t wanna pull out of your heavenly jaws at all but he still had his quota to fill. So with great reluctance he pulled out and look down at you with satisfaction. Brandishing a smile full of childlike chagrin as he sent you clutching for your pearls with his daunting words. Which hinted at the fact that you weren’t getting any sleep tonight.』

“Welp that’s one hole down baby only two more to go~ but this time I’mma fill ya up more than once since I gotta make sure that it all sticks mkay?”

[indulgentia]

@𝒃𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆𝒈𝒖𝒒𝒊𝒏  𝒔𝒂𝒊𝒅：  

It was his birthday---it was very important and so while his garou was still sleeping it came with them out under the moon Sizhui knew. He cooked, a favorite meal, a birthday cake and most importantly there was a silk wrapped gift on the table, something he had made for his beloved. A fetish that would protect him when carried it, the magic recharged under the moon. A bounce on the bed and a meep "A-Ling...happy birthday." the food set next to him.

                    ✧・ﾟ:*  〈  𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐘 ( 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 ) 𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑, 𝐉𝐈𝐍 𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆!  〉 *:・ﾟ✧

He  leans  forward,  almond  eyes  blinking  once,  twice,  several  times,  sharp  features  adorned  by  a  countenance  of  apparent  INDIFFERENCE,  although  overflowing  TENDERNESS  filled  that  creature  so  little  given  to  demonstrations  of  INTIMACY.  At  that  point,  after  so  much  time  of  seemingly  peaceful  coexistence  and  mutual  COMPANIONSHIP  with  such  tremendously  different  species,  there  should  be  no  longer  anything  worthy  of  SURPRISE  between  the  two  at  this  rate.

In  retrospect,  this  is  perhaps  his  most  UNUSUAL  birthday  ever:  His  family  has  always  been  eager  to  respect  each  and  every  TRADITION  and  FORMALITY  that  high-ranking  members  of  the  tribe  might  need  to  endure  through  their  lives.  And  even  now,  what  surprises  him  the  most  is  receiving  such  a  simple  thoughtful  gift,  instead  of  having  to  wear  the  SKIN  of  some  poor  animal  in  some  RITUAL  under  the  moonlight.  Such  a  thought  ends  up  pulling  out  of  him  a  small  chuckle  of  amusement  with  the  present  context,  albeit  still  remaining  a  bit  UNCERTAIN  of  how  to  react:  It’s  all  so  simple  and  intimate  that  every  second,  every  detail  is  carefully  ENGRAVED  in  the  heart  of  this  creature  of  such  a  young  age,  but  more  accustomed  to  RAGE  and  BRUTALITY  than  to  moments  like  this.

Garou  sits  down,  still  somewhat  dumbfounded,  before  taking  the  small  object  in  his  hands,  carefully  EXAMINING  every  aspect  of  it,  as  if  he  wanted  to  make  sure  it  was  something  real:  so  well  made  and  so  careful.  But  before  he  could  even  articulate  any  other  thoughts,  the  unfolding  events  brought  him  back  to  reality,  somewhat  surprised  but  trying  to  maintain  a  COOL  FACADE  as  his  confident  speech  breaks  the  silence: 

❛❛ This  attention  to  detail  of  yours  truly  is  IMPRESSIVE.  The  elders  would  KILL  for  magic  as  intricate  and  delicate  as  this  one. . . ❜❜      However,  the  words  of  kindness  coming  so  casually  from  the  other  seem  to  mute  his  words  for  a  second,  as  young  Silver  Fang  looked  down  hesitantly.  Good  thing  he  did  so,  maybe  the  expression  he’s  wearing  now  would  be  too  strange,  so  UNWORTHY  of  an  Aroun  of  his  tribe.  But  at  least  such  pause  seems  to  buy  him  some  time  to  think  about  his  own  words  a  little  better  before  continuing,  looking  up  at  the  other,  finally  working  up  some  COURAGE  for  one  hand  to  reach  for  the  changeling’s  soft  face.      ❛❛ T-THANKS,  Sizhui.  I  ⸻ ❜❜      Another  long,  HESITANT  pause.      ❛❛ ⸻  I'm  not  going  to  eat  this  ALL  BY  MYSELF,  right? ❜❜

[niteshade925]

April 13, Xi'an, China, Shaanxi Archaeology Museum/陕西考古博物馆 (Part 4 - Sui and Tang dynasties):

This is another star of the museum, a Tang dynasty (618 - 907 AD) bronze mirror, the back of which is decorated with carved luodian/螺钿 (mother of pearl). Near the edge are various birds, while the inner ring is arranged in a "sunflower" shape. Kinda wish I can see a modern replica of this one without all these marks and discolorations from the passage of time:

A Tang dynasty yupei/玉佩 (jade pendant). Unlike the Western Zhou dynasty yupei in part 2, this type is most definitely supposed to be hung from the waist. This one in particular was one of a set of two (both worn on waist, one on each side), and these were part of the formal wear of first to fifth rank officials during Tang dynasty:

Luo Wanshun's Epitaph/罗婉顺墓志. As mentioned in the first Beilin museum post, ancient Chinese epitaphs have a two-piece structure, consisting of a tablet and the protective covering on top. This is the protective covering on top, with the large inscription identifying this as the epitaph stone of Luo Wanshun, engraved in seal script/zhuanshu/篆书:

And here's the actual body of the epitaph. This particular epitaph was drafted by one of the "Eight Immortals of the Wine Cup"/饮中八仙, Li Jin/李琎 (he was also the nephew of Emperor Xuanzong of Tang/唐玄宗), and the calligraphy was provided by the famous calligrapher Yan Zhenqing/颜真卿:

Tang-era pottery figurines of the Chinese zodiac animals. This set is sadly incomplete, but the way these zodiac animals are partially anthropomorphized is pretty interesting. From left to right, these are tiger, rabbit, dragon, snake, sheep, and dog (yep that is a dog head, apparently). Not sure why rabbit and dog figurines are missing their ears though, maybe the ears broke off and are lost?

Sui dynasty (581 - 618 AD) green-glazed boshanlu/博山炉 incense burner. Note the panlong/蟠龙 dragon curled around the base:

Left: Sui dynasty white-glazed ewer with a chicken head-shaped handle. Right: Sui dynasty white-glazed vase. The curves on this one is *chef kiss*

More Sui dynasty white glazed pottery, but the most incredible thing is the white porcelain cup in the middle. The lip of that cup is 1mm (~1/32 in) thick, and the sides are so thin, it's almost see through:

Tang-era sancai/三彩 glazed conjoined flasks that is shaped like a pair of fish. Similar twin-fish motif can be found in numerous traditional Chinese holiday decor, and symbolize auspiciousness, wealth, and surplus--especially surplus, since fish in Chinese (鱼) is pronounced yú, and "surplus" in Chinese (余) is also pronounced yú. This is why the phrase 年年有余 ("may there be a surplus every year") is often paired up with imagery of carps, children holding giant carps, or a twin-fish motif.

Absolutely beautiful Tang-era wall mural of a tiger, which was very sadly damaged over time. But from the pieces left, you can still appreciate the raw power of the tiger captured by these lines:

Another beautiful Tang-era wall mural depicting men on horseback playing "polo", called maqiu/马球 (lit. "horse ball") in Chinese. It's unclear whether the maqiu depicted here originated in China in late Eastern Han dynasty (25 - 220 AD) or was brought to China via the Silk Road at the beginning of Tang dynasty, but anyway this sport was very popular during Tang dynasty, and there were many female players at the time too.

The women of Tang dynasty as depicted by pottery figurines:

A small model of Tang-era triple que/阙 gate towers. Que gate towers first appeared in Western Zhou dynasty (1046 - 771 BC) and have been a part of Chinese architecture ever since. Que gate towers usually come in pairs, one on each side of the gate, and they were used to display status.

A map of Tang dynasty Chang'an city laid on top of the current map of Xi'an city, showing the imperial palace (top center), the East Market/东市 and West Market/西市, and the 108 districts (called fang/坊):

A Tang-era chiwen/鸱吻 (螭吻 is the original name, 鸱吻 is the alternative name, another alternative name is 蚩吻, but the pronunciation remains the same for all three) roof ornament. These are the pairs of horn-shaped pieces on the top of the roof of traditional Chinese architecture. These ornaments are made to represent the Ninth Son of the Dragon, called Chiwen/螭吻, which looks like a dragon-headed fish and has the power to control water, thus it's used in traditional Chinese architecture to ward off fires:

Sui-era gold gilded handle of a stone sarcophagus:

A pottery jar found buried in the tomb of Crown Prince Jiemin/节愍太子 (Li Chongjun/李重俊, son of Emperor Zhongzong of Tang/唐中宗 Li Xian/李显), partially shaped like a pagoda and decorated with various Buddhist motifs such as lotus petals and elephant heads. This is speculated to be a representation of a granary, which would hold grains for the crown prince in the afterlife:

And last but not least, a Sui-era pottery camel bearing sacks that have the imagery of the Greek god of wine Dionysus upon them, which shows the great amount of cultural exchange that took place back then:

[hollyhomburg]

Before I Leave You (Pt.65)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: The truth always comes out one way or another, and with Jimin temporarily whisked away for surgery- it's up to you and yoongi to answer Namjoon's questions.

Tags: Angst, blood, guns, murder, discussions of morality, descriptions of dead bodies, discussion of past spousal abuse, confessions, hurt/comfort, sickfic, hospitals, reconciliation, vmin focus, Trans! tae, Everybody lives nobody dies,

W/c: 15.0k

A/N: this chapter is a bit heavy on the dialogue but! sorry that this chapter came out when it did, we're finally here! sorry for the break in chapters- I got some not great news about a family members health and wanted to spend some extra time with them over the holidays.

Previous part - Masterlist - First part

The abandoned industrial building rises without warning from the mist and fog. You could almost call in lonely. Although it has its comfort in its stillness, the same way that monsters that do not move do not instill fear. A foe vanquished but not forgotten.

The body. The dust. The puddle of blood by the door is more than enough evidence for plausible deniability. The faint splatter of it here and there like confetti left after a parade, or flower petals that fall in spring and pile up like snow.

Moonbyul stands in the doorway, like a pagan in a house of God. Out of place and out of mind. Dark coat unblemished by dust or blood. She doesn’t stoop to touch the ground or try and clean up the evidence from Jimin and Jin’s misbegotten hours here. She doesn’t think Hobi’s name, although she knows it.

God does she know it.

She’s poured over all the files that her men have collected about your pack for weeks now. Searching out weaknesses like a snake searches rabbit holes for soft fur and an easy meal. She’d spent the most time lingering over Tae’s file. The photos that shift from short hair to long, lipstick that she finds too pink and distasteful.

Red is better color.

She'd spent a long time pouring over Jin’s too because she’d needed to. Jimin and her cousins had been glossed over. She already knows enough about them to last a lifetime.

But only one file had given her paper cuts. Revenge on paper is not as sweet as it should be.

She doesn’t need to read that file anymore. Although she hears the words that the youth said so many months ago on repeat, you and Hobi in the coffee shop caught only on security camera. “I think I heard something I shouldn’t have”. As well as the ones that followed.

Contrary to popular belief, Moonbyul doesn’t like killing. She views it only as a necessity. She looks at the blood on the floor without any disgust. It’s been a long time since she’s cleaned up any alpha's mess, and she’s not going to start now.

She looks down at the blood and smiles. It’s a rare thing- seeing her smile. It’s different from her grin that bares her teeth. Sharped incisors changed and honed just before she’d been appointed the head of the moon family.

She remembers her mother's words when she’d looked at them in the mirror for the first time, She remembers that she could still taste the file they'd used to carve them. Metallic, like blood on her tongue.

“All the most dangerous alphas have fangs; you’ll need to learn to use them if you want to fill your father’s shoes.”

Familial death is more of a rite of passage than a time for mourning in the family. A time when power shifts and secrets get covered up or aired out. Like the moon waxing and waning.

Moonbyul hadn’t been born with fangs, the way alphas always are. Moonbyul hadn’t been born with a lot of things.

A smiling Moonbyul is either a happy or a bloodthirsty one. And a happy Moonbyul, when properly stroked- means they get privileges.

Privileges in their pack, amount to small little things most of the time. A night where they don’t have to take the heat inducers. A night where they can wear comfy sweats instead of the lingerie and stifling silk. But if they're extra sweet and good they get better things. A free evening where they can see their families as long as they come home before sunrise.

“Do you think he’s dead?” Solar is dressed as her clone today, with stockings pulled up her milky thighs flashing beneath the long hem. Extra extra cute in the way that she loops her arm into Moonbyuls and pouts. as if she's upset that her alpha is paying more attention to the murder than her.

She still smells faintly of sex, moonbyul, and her own ginger scent. Not like fresh cut- the kind that baked goods have around Christmas time.

Moonbyul smiles, rapping her long nails against where Solar's arm is curled around hers clinging to her as if her life depends on it. It does- Moonbyul and her both know it does. But Solar has always been a good pet. She’s never needed quite as much correction as Wheein who likes to know exactly where her cage ends and begins, or like Hyejin- who needs nearly as much combatting and careful maneuvering as their enemies.

She'd learned from Hyejin. Had never let the others have quite as much freedom or get used to challenging her. There's a reason why Hyejin had demanded to wear her mating mark and why Moonbyul had let her have it.

Omega's however sweet and however docile, still need a cage. Moonbyul's only ever tried to branch out of her tastes once, and she won't ever do it again. Disastrous as alphas are. They make piss-poor lovers and disobedient needy pets.

She sighs. Alphas and their messes.

In truth, the pack could use someone truly obedient, someone for whom being good is as easy as breathing to balance them out. The pack could use a good pup. The pack could use you.

Moonbyul burns in want, stewing in it ravenous. It’s not love, it’s not even really lust either. She’s never been an easily sated person. She’s always wanted too much, always finished the whole pint of ice cream in one sitting. She’s always wanted everything.

That’s why she’s smiling, because she’s about to get it.

She stands a little straighter, holding out her palm. “Why don’t we go see.” Moonbyul doesn’t turn to leave, however. She doesn't walk towards the body dumped at the back of the building, still bearing Jin's fingerprints. A single strand of hair would do it. She doesn’t make any move other than to reach into her pocket and take out a lighter.

She thinks of the family's assassins; The Bee, The Spider and The Wolf. She thinks of Park Jimin. The snake. Hopefully either dead or in the process of dying.

The body in the back of the building is another one of hers. She never thought that this would be the end of the Wolf, he'd always been one of their most reliable killers. Always showed up on time too, an exemplary employee. Not to be easily duped. She'll have to figure this out and pin down What did him in. But that will take time and energy, only one of which she has.

He was only supposed to wait in the wings and ensure that neither Park Jimin nor Kim Seokjin left this building alive, nothing more.

Sometimes things are just coincidences, sometimes if you're lucky- they're just bad luck.

This doesn't feel like bad luck, this feels like revenge.

Solar makes a noise in her throat, a questioning chirp. She really is trying to be her cutest right now. Moonbyul won’t reward her in a way that she likes, a way that she wants. Even songbirds still feel the itch to fly. Clipped wings and all.

She looks at the flame, sparking.

“Why won’t you just leave the evidence? Wouldn’t that be easier?” Solar is not as good as Hyejin at handling this sort of thing, not as experienced. But she’s currently handling other more important things. Things that need her finer touch.

Solar doesn’t understand why Moonbyuls going to light this place up like a fucking Christmas tree and do Seokjin’s dirty work for him. Solar is only a pup, and she’s been kept like that because Moonbyul likes pupish omegas.

She likes the innocence and obedience that people who weren't made for this kind of life have. So eager to please that they're willing to debase their souls. There is no greater sacrifice, no greater sign of love than someone willing to do anything for you.

This also happens to be why she likes you. Why she will have you. because neither Solar nor Wheein have ever been as good at this as you were. The perfect medium between sinful and pious. Cute even while killing.

And 5 is a prettier number than 4. 3 pups for her and Hyejin is a prettier number than 2. They need more than one for each.

Just one more pup, and then their collection will be complete. It took them so long to find the right one, so much trial and error. (Moonbyul despises errors. She's going to try and kill one before this is through)

She won’t let you slip through their grasp, not a second time. You should have never been Yoongi's.

“Wouldn’t it be easier to leave this as evidence? So that the FBI gets them all? We could just like- buy them off if they wanted to take her too-”

“Oh pup” she croons, half gentle. Flicking the lighter and letting it burn in front of her face before she tosses it The soil is so soaked through with gasoline that it lights as easily as a candle, slowly spreading from wall to wall and then- in the doorway, until the heat is too much and they have to move away.

“That wouldn’t be any fun now, would it?”

~-~

(Now, Namjoon)

Namjoon’s shirt is soaked so thoroughly with blood that it makes him cold. The hospital always feels cold, goosebumps rise like a mini mountain ranges on his arms. The hair pressed down where the blood has dried.

It’s not his first time covered in blood, but this time feels different.

He’s shivering, teeth clattering. His hands shake almost too bad to fill out the intake paperwork because he’d rather do it now than later. Park Jimin (registered, Kim) Alpha, weight 165 lbs (give or take a few). Blood type AB. No medications. No known allergies, no known prior conditions. No no no.

No.

Namjoon’s hands shake. He leaves Jimin’s ‘occupation’ blank.

Yoongi sits a few paces back, staring vacantly off into space. On the surface Namjoon would assume that he’s having no reaction and is feeling absolutely heartless about everything that's happened in the last 3 hours. But his breath becomes stuttered every few minutes, like he has to manually force himself to inhale and exhale. Like it’s taking all of Yoongi’s faculties to keep himself breathing and upright and not in a heap on the floor having a mental breakdown.

He kind of wishes Yoongi was crying and screaming instead. Then at least- Namjoon would feel like he had to be the strong one.

He can't get the feeling of stabbing Jimin out of his head, or the sound it it, the wet squelch of knife hitting skin.

Namjoon has cut into people thousands if not hundreds of thousands of times by now. But he’s only cut into someone he loves once, and god Namjoon never wants to do it again- won’t ever be able to touch warm prone flesh and hurt it, not after Minnie. Never again.

The pen in his hand weighs a million pounds. He contemplates asking for a piece of paper and writing out his resignation letter. he breathes in for 5 and out for 9, then sets it down on the clipboard and slides it across the counter for the nurse to take. Namjoon doesn’t hear her quiet tone asking him if he's alright and if there's anything she can do. just shakes his head on instinct.

There is a gaggle of nurses looking around the corner peering at Dr. Kim.

"Do you think he dresses like that outside of work hours?" "I never thought I'd be so attracted to jeans and a tee-shirt." Giggling in quiet voices.

It feels so strange, to hear people laughing while Jimin is dying. Namjoon almost wants to go bite their heads off and report them for poor bedside manner to the hospital manager.

This is Namjoon’s hospital. But Namjoon can’t find it in himself to smile or say thank you to the nurse when she tells him that the second she gets any news on Jimin, he'll be the first to know. He can’t say anything through the mountain of emotion in his throat.

If Namjoon’s love is a mountain, then his anguish is a river threatening to drown him. Yoongi smells like it- the line where water turns clear to brackish, Yoongi’s miserable scent has always smelled like the churning sea and now something that feels an awful lot like seasickness makes Namjoon sway on his feet.

Since he’s done with the paperwork, he promptly returns to Yoongi’s side and sits down. Only once he's sure he's stationary, does he pull a nearby wastebasket over between his knees to upend the contents of his stomach. It hits the top of old gauze pads crumpled up at the bottom and smelling like piss with a surprisingly violent sound, drawing the gaze of more than one person in the waiting room. At least it finally quiets the giggles.

Yoongi’s hand finds Namjoon’s knee, the hole in his jeans, The back of his ribs, stroking once twice. steady and hard the way that Namjoon likes. And Namjoon wishes he could snap at Yoongi. Wishes he didn’t curl into the touch. Wishes he was angrier. Wishes Jimin was perfectly alive and breathing and not going to-

Yoongi’s hand settles on the back of Namjoon’s neck, his throat, pulse hammering, thudding.

They’re just kids and Yoongi's hands are calloused. They've always been.

Deep down Namjoon still feels like he’s only 8 years old. Is just a kid and just starting to understand that the world isn’t all just papercuts and skinned knees; that it means something when people hurt. That it means something when you tell them you won’t let them hurt anymore.

He remembers promising Jimin something similar- a long time ago, the summer they all first met:

Namjoon remembers Jimin, standing in the apartment that wasn't theirs yet, after a movie night, the first movie night that the pack had ever had togeather (not totally togeather, becuase you and hobi hadn't been there yet but still).

It was the first time Namjoon had ever seen Jimin in something other than a designer sweater, sweats and a tee-shirt so ordinary that Namjoon was surprised it didn't make him look less intimidating. standing in the doorway waiting for Namjoon to notice him and look up from his medical journal.

"Yes Minnie? Did you need something?" jimin had shifted from foot to foot. looking up at jimin, a first slice of vulnerability in his eyes.

"Tae and Jungkook, they've got a bit of pain in them. I want to know what you intend to do with it." namjoon set his glasses to the side, the papers rustling as he forgets his reason.

"Make it better hopefully?" Namjoon had been struck with how oddly intense he'd been. Jimin had opened up with time and had gone sweet and trusting with the right amount of love. But he'd looked intimidating in his dark clothes and the wrinkle between his eyes like he was used to furrowing his eyebrows. A cute detail that Namjoon already wants to brush away. To touch. to cradle. To love.

He'll catalogue all of Park Jimin's cutest things in time. He'll treat love as a scavenger hunt, to find the softness in someone who tries so outwardly to be gruff and strong.

Namjoon's stained sleep clothes and promises felt all the more shabby in comparison.

"I need you to promise."

Namjoon had avoided it. Unwilling to meet his words with the same intensity. Jimin doesn't take chances with Jungkook and Tae. Tae's low laugh from the other room, Yoongi's matching grumble, overly fond already. Overly fond from the beginning.

"What about you? Doesn't everyone have pain?"

"Just promise."

"I promise to look after the three of you." Jimin had scoffed. Puffing up like a bird with too many feathers.

"I don't need looking after. Just them- when I go away for work."

"I know, but let me do it anyway." Smiling at the pretty alpha was so easy, so easy with the sounds of Jungkook and Jin's giggles in the other room. Laughter building itself into the walls around them.

"I promise not to hurt you or them. You have my word."

Namjoon lied, Namjoon lied back then and he didn't even know it. He upends his stomach again and Yoongi rubs down his spine.

“He’s not going to die Joon, he’s going to be fine.” Namjoon continues to empty his stomach, it’s pizza mostly, a bit of coffee, and a half-digested protein bar from this morning as well.

“Does hurting the people you love ever get easier?” Namjoon asks. Honesty, not anger in his tone.

Yoongi’s hair has gotten longer and hangs in his eyes. Yoongi never grew his hair out before you, always kept it in that short black sort of coconutty style. It makes him look older and all the more beautiful. Namjoon wonders if that’s why you like it; How regal it makes your mate look.

Yoongi has asked so much of Namjoon in the last few years, from leaving to coming back and bringing you. To hiding the mating mark and now this. Namjoon tells himself he should care more about Yoongi's lies and less about the fact that he just lied, period.

“No,” Yoongi grimaces. He always gets so quiet when things are bad, steady in that consistent way. He still hasn't stopped stroking Namjoon's back. Namjoon knows this is simply all Yoongi knows how to do, his first instinct is to love and not much else. “It was never easy.”

It’s not weird that they re-hash this now. Every time Namjoon learns more about how and why Yoongi left, he understands it more.

“I threw up too, just so you know- when I left, leaving you made me so sick that I hurled the second I got on that train. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.” He blinks back wetness in his eyes, “I don't remember if I've ever told you that."

Namjoon nods. He can't remember right now either.

It’s been an hour or so now since Yoongi drove fast but steady steady steady to the hospital. Namjoon in the back while he stabilized Jimin in much the same fashion that you'd done earlier. The rest of the pack should be here soon. The three of you only lingered behind to clean up a bit and change your clothes, covered with blood and muck and who knows what else.

Yoongi sits like a statue and Namjoon can’t even look at him, can’t ask any questions or even start because he already feels like he’s yelling, and Namjoon hates yelling. This isn't isn’t exactly the most private venue for secrets that could land Jimin in jail.

Namjoon's still not entirely convinced that stabbing him was worth it. Namjoon’s brain is dizzy with terror. He’s still dizzy when he turns and sees you walking through the front doors to his hospital, Jin and Hobi trailing behind you.

He remembers the way you’d looked the day they’d gotten you checked out for the first time; how you’d run and pressed your face to his chest and buried your face there like just the sound of Namjoon's heart could make every demon and monster go away. For a moment, Namjoon thinks you might do the same thing. But your steps are measured, slow, and purposeful.

Namjoons eyes train on you, following you as you walk,

Yoongi stands, leaving Namjoon sitting with a cooling pail of vomit between his legs. he says something to you, to jin, but you don't pause, continuing until you're standing in front of him.

You don't say anything to him, just peer into the bucket and make a disgusted face down at it. Namjoon's teeth feel too sharp in his mouth with such a tense jaw.

Hoseok is on the phone, face gaunt and tired-looking. He must have drawn the short end of the stick and has the job of calling Jungkook and Tae and telling them what happened. They really shouldn’t drive themselves, but all Namjoon can reasonably do is restrain himself from cornering you and Jin and start demanding answers. 

He barely even turns to Jin when the omega goes up to the desk and asks if they can have a room, please. A private place for the pack to nurse their worries and not crowd the already-packed waiting room. Namjoon couldn’t name the nurse by name right now if he wanted to but he’s well known here and well-liked too. They give them one of the adjacent exam rooms to wait- Jimin’s surgery will take a few hours more, and there isn’t anything to do but wait.

Terrible terrible waiting, terrible terrible time. (You get a bucket when you want a drop and a drop when you want a deluge. Time only comes in two increments; too much or not enough.)

You drop a hand on Namjoon’s shoulder without a word. After some beckoning Namjoon follows you into the room. Legs shaking and sluggish at first. The pack is quiet even as the door closes. 

But once Namjoon's moving it’s hard to stop, careening like a comet or a bullet in your direction. Staggering.

You’d taken precious seconds to change your blood stained clothes before following Namjoon. You all pulled on the first things you could get your hands on. Which is how you’ve ended up in your mate’s shirt and Jungkook’s jacket, and how Hoseok’s in one of Tae’s extra-large pink sleep shirts stained from hair dye underneath Namjoon’s puffer coat and a pair of jungkook's grey work out sweats. Jin had been a little bit more purposeful- his sweatpants match- his matching purple set.

Namjoon's shirt is dark from blood, the bloodstain drying crusty, sticking to his skin like glue.

To say that Namjoon is angry is an understatement; rage rolls off of him in quiet unending ripples carrying with it the strength to change the pack for good if he’s not careful. He doesn't walk to the chairs no- he bee-lines it to you.

He watches you startle and turn, eyes widening. You do not make to move out of his path. 

Namjoon has never made you feel afraid before, but the pulse of it, the threat of fear is there as he backs you against the wall until your body lies against it. Looming over your head, so much taller and larger than you.

An alpha. An alpha hunting.

You tremble but you do not move to avoid him when he corners you.

He has a tiny bit of blood on his face, and a hairline splatter, almost like a constellation of stars across his temple. His fingers are harsh and shaking when they dig into your cheeks, pinching them until your lips open. Your knees tremble and you press your palm flat against the wall.

His scent thunders so thick and consuming that you can't physically stop yourself from trying to bear your throat. Namjoon stops you, holding you in place.

His eyes are dark and heavy-lidded as he looks down at you, He pinches your cheeks harder, shakinging you just a little. His voice is steady when he speaks, inches away from low snarl.

“Never make me hurt one of our packmates again.” You swallow, although it’s hard. And he pinches again- harder before you get a chance to speak- to try and defend why you brandished that knife at Jimin hours ago. Namjoon holds your face the same way he held the knife- tenderly.

“I mean it. Never.”

He holds you there for a second longer before he lets you go, leaving you gasping. His hand slides down your throat to your shoulder and neck, You would fall over if it wasn't for his touch keeping you up.

“I’m sorry.” You choke out, a few stingy tears making themselves known at the corner of your eyes. Namjoon rests his forehead against yours and closes his eyes. His spiky silver hair hits your skin. Rough.

After a second, he opens them again. Nodding. And his scent loses its bitter edge. He guides you to rest against his chest. You take big gasps of his scent now that he's giving you permission. Your instincts thunder through you so viciously that you can't physically stop yourself from tilting your neck and bearing your throat. 

Namjoon just drags a finger down it, humming. He holds you up, arms around you, a shield and a cage.

“It’s not okay.” I’m not okay, “but I forgive you.” Your knees do give out when Namjoon’s hand brushes the back of your neck, fingers digging in, a half hearted scruff that feels a bit like an apology of his own.

Even if he wants to be angry, anger won’t accomplish anything. Especially with you. His anger will only make you afraid and although Namjoon cannot be expected to control his emotions all the time, you have no reason to fear him.

He's never going to hurt you. He promised.

He walks you two strides, to put you into a chair next to Yoongi. Your mate takes you from him. The plastic chair makes a loud scraping noise against the linoleum floor. Jin's on your other side looking just as tired as the rest of you.

You'll get no rest tonight, sleeping in Jimin's hospital room when he gets out of surgery. Every fitful dream interrupted by the oxygen monitor on his arm. the first few hours when it will go off twice and prompt examination of his vasculature and operation site as well as a fresh dose of blood thinners. The biggest danger going forward will be blood clots; one too large in jimin's arm could leave his hand with nerve damage, numb for good.

But for now, Namjoon looks down at you, yoongi, and jin sitting in the plastic chairs. Secret, killer, and agent. All there in a pretty little row. Namjoon glares down at the three of you and crosses his arms.

“Explain.” Namjoon can’t wait another minute, another second. “Explain to me everything going on in my pack that I don't know about right now or I swear I'll-"

Yoongi scoffs, "That you'll what? That you'll tear us apart Namjoon? that you'll leave? Look around you- we're already falling to pieces." 

"You don't honestly expect me not to be angry that I had to stab jimin do you-"

"No, but don't yell at her. I have my limits."

"I wish I was one of those limits, but i'm clearly not since you insist on fucking over our pack-"

Jin turns, cutting them off from their argument with the true shock of his next words. You know that's what he's intending- but it sort of backfires. "Joonie, Don't get mad at Yoongi or her for this. Especially since I'm the one who shot Jimin. It was an accident."

You flinch, then put your head in your hands, namjoon's scent goes impossibly thick and angry for a second before he gets it under control. You physically watch Namjoon's hackles raise. watch Yoongi push back in his chair, leg jumping, running his hands through his hair looking from you to Jin, then back again.

"Jin, you should have kept that to yourself."

"What the fuck-"

Namjoon looks like he doesn't know weather to cry or laugh. "You don't just shoot someone on accident-"

Jin's got the best scoff, one worthy of music screens not just the quiet tomb of this room. Your relationship that's dying all around you. "You don't just stab someone on accident either and yet here we are-"

There are some secrets you take to the grave and others that you keep for too long, so long that they make a grave out of you. Keeping secrets is like keeping someone else's heart beating, you run out of blood eventually. 

You might vomit up the truth all over the hospital floor just like Namjoon did a few minutes ago. You feel sick and light-headed and sort of like you might have low blood sugar. namjoon's scent, angry alpha affects you more than you realize.

You start to teater, and their next biting words get extinguished when you almost fall out of the chair, nearly sliding to the floor before Namjoon catches you. One knee dully aches as he picks you up like you weigh nothing, ducking in close, real concern in his face, all his anger gone.

"Shit are you okay?"

"Pup?"

"Just got lightheaded-" Whatever it was, your lightheadedness will have to wait for another time. It's honestly probably just stress. Your heart feels like it's beating extra fast, extra hard.

Namjoon places you gently back in the chair and Yoongi touches your shoulder, the trio of their concerned faces that you swat away.

"We should wait for Hobi." You still owe him an explanation- for earlier and these aren't the kind of secrets you say more than you have to. A cup of water gets thrust into your hands and for once, they fall silent.

When Hobi comes in he’s mostly quiet holding his phone in his hand. Looking at you from across the room. His soulful eyes watching you, head tipping to the side in deference.

"Tae's in-" It takes him a second to gather his words. "Tae's in a fucking state. She was crying so hard that Jungkook had to call them an Uber. I just told her Jimin had been stabbed and nothing else because I didn't know what to tell her."

"That's probably for the best we don't have to-" your mate starts, but Namjoon cuts him off.

"No, no more secrets. Not between any of us."

Hoseok still has a hickey from you on the side of his neck, from you earlier. Jin's fingers skim down the one on your shoulder where a mirrored mark sits knocking you out of your Hobi-induced reverie, red and bruising from his mouth. Jin raises his eyebrow at you, but now is not the time to tell him about you and hobi.

"We've got like- maybe 30 minutes until they get here."

You swallow past a lump in your throat, readying yourself for it, “better make it quick then,” Namjoon waits, Seokjin is silent, watching you, gaze flickering from you to Hobi every few blinks. Yoongi holds onto your knee, sliding his palm down to your hand, your wrist. Finger digging into the sensitive scent gland there and rubbing comforting circles.

You swallow hard. “We’re all on each other's sides, right?”

“Of course,” Jin crosses his arms like he's offended you even had to ask. You bite back your retort. Namjoon nods, so does Hobi.

Your hair flops as you nod. But you still look to Yoongi to wait for permission. After a breath your mate nods and spreads his hands, giving you the floor.

If there’s one thing you know it’s that you can’t do this alone, you and Yoongi, Namjoon and Jin, Jimin and Tae. You and Hobi. There is no separation here, not when it comes to your safety. Each of you cannot keep the rest safe on your own.

“I met Jimin a few months before I met Yoongi, I…Yoongi’s family-”

Yoongi resists the temptation to speak for about 10 seconds when you fall silent. You can sense the moment that the truth shifts, when it explodes at Yoongi’s tongue. Unbidden but frantic and relieving like it's taken Yoongi's whole being to keep all this in.

“My family, I've never liked calling them that. Blood means nothing to me, you guys, you guys were always my family more than them." The pack is silent but you lace your hands with his and nudge his thigh with yours, encouraging him to go on.

"My relatives run the largest network of organized crime on the East Coast, from Boston to Miami. Everything from racketeering to prostitution to production and distribution of pharmaceutical-grade opioids. cover ups, sale of illegal weapons, extorsion of political officials and blackmail. If you can think of a crime they do it. If you can think of a way to make money, they've got their hands in it. It’s one of the reasons why I don’t go home- why my parents-”

Yoongi breaks off, his voice going small and quiet. Wounds he doesn’t talk about- even to you.

“There’s maybe 200 of us now. I’ve got a lot of fucking aunts and uncles. We try to stay in our lanes, our cities, and deal only in our respective crimes. There's a lot of politics and a lot of people vying for control here and there, but only alphas are allowed to lead, omega's increases the bonds of power in other ways and beta's- You know how rare beta's are- in my family- i'm treated as second only to the family head. Being a beta offered me certain liberties. Other freedoms. Not only to avoid most of the violent stuff- but to leave and move around without asking for permission. It's like a get out of hell free card. Not everyone gets that."

You snort, crossing your arms over your chest, “You mean they didn’t exactly expect you to go about popping heirs or advancing the family business through murder and ruining innocent people's lives. not like they expected with me."

Hoseok shrivels his nose, He looks from you to Yoongi- eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “hang on i thought- Are you guys trying to say you’re fucking related or-”

“Oh my god daisy-”

You splutter, “gross- No, we’re not fucking like- blood-related or anything.” You tap your chest. "I'm non family- brought in from the outside. Which means I was just about as valuable as piss to the aunts. In our world the only reason to mate or marry is for power- any other reason and your spouse is considered disposable." you cross your legs, admitting something you've kept to yourself, not a secret just a suspicion. "Geumjae never intended to keep me around forever."

Seokjin makes a strangled noise and Namjoon runs his hands through his hair, “Jesus Christ.”

Hobi raises his hands bare, “Sorry! You’re not doing a good job of explaining!”

"Well, if you just gave me a minute to get to the point-" Yoongi seems to shake himself, to put himself together. “Like she said- I'm not expected to partake in the family buisness, Only alphas are allotted that 'honor'." Yoongi puts the words in quotations and adds an eye roll for good measure.

"Mainly- I’m treated as some sort of glorified advice Column. People call and ask me things and I’m required to answer or else they’d hunt me down and drag me back. They bring me in to coordinate stuff because I'm a beta and I keep everyone calm and keep them from killing each other and shooting out their squabbles. I tried to keep you guys safe that’s why I left but-“

Jin’s hand goes to yours, nodding, because he understands. “But not why you stayed away.”

“No. It's not.” The pack's eyes naturally stray to you.

“The heads of houses report to the family head and she directs them to me if they need a beta's touch. Only she hasn't- the new Don hasn't asked anything of me since taking power. When the last one died- my grandparents- I left to help with the transition. But the new Don doesn't need me."

You flinch, you try to hide it but Yoongi turns, ferreting out that there's a secret there without you having to confess it. Your voice is darker than they’ve ever heard. "It's not that she doesn't need you- it's that she doesn't trust you."

Yoongi tries not to sound accusatory. "Her trust isn't something you should be after."

“It’s not- promise I just-” You pick at a stray thread on your pants.

The linoleum floor in front of you is polished so clean that you can see your reflection in it. "She shouldn't trust me either- and she knows it. Believe me she knows it."

Now it's Yoongi's turn to look at you. To pull himself to the edge of his chair to try and get in front of you. A wordless question that he dares not speak.

"Before you, I was already trying to do whatever I had to survive. including doing what everyone else did back in that hellhole and ask for help-"

Yoongi stands, to much energy and panic in his body to stay seated. “You didn’t." This is a fight and a confession you shouldn’t have In front of the rest of them.

You look up at Yoongi, eyes beseeching. He's quiet and you make your words as measured and soft as you can. "I asked your grandparents first- and then when she told me as long as I did what she said she'd get me out I-"

“She’s more dangerous than Geumjae, you can’t have honestly been trying to trade one captor for another."

The whole pack is silent, watching the two of you. Not really understanding. But Jin- Jin pursues his lips. You don't know how he knows but he does.

Yoongi’s face goes truly white. Yoongi’s hands are shaking. Shaking until he grabs the handles of your chair, knees to the ground, bowed in front of you. Letting your silence stew for a second.

Maybe it’s a terrible thing to blame it on her, you hadn’t fought not to kill. But back then it had really felt like your only way out, the only way to escape the ever-suffocating pressure of trying not to die.

“For what it’s worth, I had no idea what they meant to you when she made me help her kill them.”

Something shifts in Yoongi’s stature, from surprise and shock to resignation so quickly you almost miss it. A tense set to his jaw but a tight-lipped understanding as his eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips and he rests his forehead on your knees.

He's very careful in his words. Slow with them and intentional when he lifts his head and stands. You don't know if they're lies. “Just like my parents, just like all of us in the family, I knew their days were numbered anyway.” But you loved them once you want to say. You’re not sure why you want Yoongi to be angry at you.

“I won’t apologize, not for what I had to do to survive.”

Yoongi cradles your cheek. Something dark and conflicted in his eyes.

“I know, but I’d forgive you anyway, even if you did it out of anger.”

“And Jimin?” Namjoon asks, Yoongi's hand drops from your cheek. "How does he connect to all of that?"

“I met him first, I asked him.” You hesitate. This isn't your secret to tell and you don't even know all of it- like how jimin even became an assassin or started killing. you don't know his motives. It's one thing to confess your own sins, and another to talk about Jimin's to them without his say-so.

Jin darts forward, holding your hand in both of his, “Whatever we say in this room- I’d never dream of recording. I’m not on anyone’s side but ours.” Jin screws his eyes shut tight, willing you and Yoongi to believe him. "Even with the FBI thing."

Namjoon whirls. He doesn't have to ask before Jin's spilling it. telling the truth.

Jin is measured with his speech, but it's his turn. No more secrets, that's what you've all agreed. "I've been working with the FBI for the last 8 years. They approached me back before we met Joonie- because of my proximity to Yoongi. First as an informant, then an agent and now the head of the task force.

"I only did it because I figured out that being a part of them was the easiest way to keep Yoongi out of jail. As long as I could reasonably assume I was the only one trusted and close enough to keep an eye on him, I could keep all the truly damning evidence out of their hands."

Jin turns to you, resisting the urge to reach out to you for his own comfort, you're looking at him like he's got three heads, but he smiles down at you, that pup-soft smile that he saves just for you when you're both nesting.

"I kept your name off of the photocopies of the recipie you used to kill them. Don't worry, no one but us knows." You look at Jin with new eyes, not a double agent but not an enemy either. Somewhere in between. Your heart pulses, and you grip his hand back.

Yoongi pulls his hands through his hair, angry, his tone grave "Well there's your reason-"

Hobi has been so quiet you've honestly almost forgotten he was there. Elbows balanced on his knees and watching the three of you on trial for Namjoon. "Answer to what."

"You don't understand Jin, you don't understand the laws of the family much less the one you've broken."

"The reason why someone's trying to kill you, if anyone finds out that Y/n killed them- everyone connected to them is fair game."

"You mean-"

"We're all done, if anyone finds out, that's probably why the new head of house was trying to take Jin out- to tie up a loose end."

"Hang on, I'm getting confused again." Hobi runs his hands through his hair, and it fluffs up. "Jimin's what again?"

“Jimin is an assassin, I asked Jimin to kill my husband for me but he said no.” You pick at a strand of thread on your pants, unwilling to look up and meet any of their eyes, not Namjoon’s or Jin’s. “Met him back when we meant nothing to each other. He still feels guilty for not saving me. We talked it out a while ago. It’s okay- I did it myself eventually- didn’t need anyone’s help.”

You look up at Yoongi and he looks like he might want to laugh or cry and can't pick which. “I don’t know much else about Jimin other than that he kills for the family."

"They've got people for everything, a few assassin's they keep on retainer," Yoongi clarifies. "People that anyone can hire if you've got the money for it. There are a few names that the family puts on a no-kill list, Children, the pack mates of the ruling pack, the heads of houses and their immediate packmates. If anyone kills a person on the no-kill list- their life is forfeit. I'm on it by default. The pack mates of the beta are on it too, All of you are on it. No one should be trying to kill you."

Yoongi's never paid much attention to the list, the waxing and waning names and faces and photos. he's been on it since before he was born and with no intent to kill or harm anyone and put himself even potentially in harm's way, he's never sought it out.

Maybe if he had, things would go differently.

A cold rush of realization rushes over you. "That's why Jimin and Jin ended up there" You stand up, adrenaline in your hands. "She was hoping they'd take each other out so she wouldn't have to break family law to kill them."

Yoongi shakes his head, "Something about this doesn’t feel right- something about this isn’t normal.”

Hobi’s phone dings before you can hash it out anymore. He looks down in his lap. “They're here,” he’s up and out of the chair, heading out the door and into the hall so quickly that the rest of you have to chase after him. Namjoon tugs you to your feet, staring at Yoongi and Jin. "Was that enough?" you ask.

"We'll talk more later." is all he says. But he does lace his hands with yours and pull you after Hobi. Your legs are so short you have to take two steps for every one of theirs.

“I wish Tae and Kookie were here for that-“

"They should know” your mate agrees, keeping pace with you in the hallway, dropping back with you when Namjoon accidentally lets go in his haste to get through the door. You make eye contact with Yoongi when you turn. Your back to one of those push doors using your body weight to push through it.

You pause, waiting with Yoongi on the other side of them.

“If anyone tells her about Minnie- should be me.”

(You know exactly how you’ll do it, you’ll tell Tae the story of you just like this. You’ll tell it like a story, with author notes and playlists near the end. You’ll talk about Jimin just like this; all of the good parts and all of the bad all in one. So that she might truly understand that having a choice doesn't always mean you're free to do whats right.)

Yoongi nods, “I can tell Jungkook. I think if I do it gently, he won’t get shocked enough to have a seizure.”

You pause before the doors open, to have just a moment with the two of you, just you and him leaning against it. He shifts closer, not holding you, hands by his side but he's close enough that you could rest your head on his shoulder. You do rest your head on his shoulder. Just to hear his heartbeat thud sluggish and heaven-sent against your ear.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there.” It feels like it’s been ages and ages since you’ve had a quiet moment with him like this. You resolve to have one, to make space for him when this is all over. A private date with just the two of you maybe. Whenever Jimin comes home. “To help with Jimin.”

“It’s okay. I’m sorry I killed your grandparents.”

“They weren’t good people,” Yoongi shrugs, you've never seen a sadder shrug. “I always knew that. They-” yoongi breaks off, stealing himself for a quiet confession. "I think they might have had a hand in killing my parent. She didn't like it- that they had so much power over me. Future of the family and all."

"You've never said-"

Yoongi pushes through the door, and a high pitched keening cuts off your next words. "Later."

You push through the door and Tae and Jungkook are already there. Entering through the outside doors with a puff of air into Namjoon and Jin's waiting arms. Namjoon holds Tae up as she wails and wails. Her cry high like a nightingale. Jungkook looks pale and shaky, settled under Hobi's shoulder clearly in shock.

You cut through them, ducking under Jin's outstretched arm and colliding with Tae before anyone else can join Namjoon in holding her. falling to little heap on the linoleum floor, just at the precipice of the long hallway that connects to the patient rooms and the nurse's stations to other surgical suites. Drawing countless stars, countless looks from passersby as Tae's sobs renew themselves, loud and broken.

You clinging to each other. Her arms around your shoulders, cradling your head like it's the last safe thing in the universe.

“Jimin,” her voice breaks, throat closing around nothing. Sobs wet and angry, hot tears dripping down her cheeks, big and unabated by hope. "Minnie- My Minnie-"

You cling back, getting your hands on her cheeks. “He’s gonna be fine, he’ll be alright- here- here let me help you up. We've got you Tae-”

Jungkook looks a bit better, a little bit less like he’s drowning. Jin reaches for him while you hold onto Tae. And JK’s nostrils flare, he steps back, looking Jin up and down. Tae clings to you on the floor of the hospital and you look up at them. At Jin and Jungkook, standing a pace apart. Jungkook's hands keep Jin from coming any closer.

“You smell like Jimin does when he comes home from his trips, you smell like gunpowder. And mucky-” Jungkook's voice breaks, "Jin? Why do you smell like blood?"

There are too many people around, too many people for something like this. You're just glad It’s a quiet omission, Jungkook’s scent is level and so is his breath.

Maybe you should give him a lot more credit. Yoongi might not have to tell him much.

Tae's tears hit your collarbones as she crushes you, sobbing loudly in your ear, immune to the string of sweet nothings that fall from your lips. Whispered against her temple.

To everyone else in the hallway, rushing in the late-night hum, you and Tae look just the way that you’d expect; Two girls clinging to each other, one tall and the other short. One an alpha and the other an omega.

The rest of the pack is so blinded by their concern and their terror that they don’t look up. They don’t look down the hall to see the figure standing there watching them. One second the hallway is empty of the dark figure and then next she's there- waiting for you.

Her pine and medicine scent is disguised by the smell of death that lingers here. Although more than 2 of the people there might recognize it if they had the patience to sniff it out. They're too distracted by Yoongi dragging Jungkook close and whispering in his ear to keep his voice down.

Moonbyul watches the scene from the end of the hall. Two coffees in her hands. One for her and one for you because she always assumes that you'll go with her when she asks. No matter what’s going on with your pack, Moonbyul is not the kind of person who you say no to. She’ll ask nicely for you to come one more time.

Or so she thought. Looking at you and Tae holding each other is giving her other ideas.

To love a man is something she's always been able to dismiss as a mistake. Little pups just don't know what they need and even less what they want. She'd been prepared to deal with you loving them, the alphas, on paper, even the admittedly pretty omega male currently in her cousin's arms.

But another woman? Even one like that?

Rage is not like other sorts of anger, it’s not like fire burning to take. Achieng to burn until all the heat has worked itself out. Rage is quiet, rage is darkness and a hunger that needs to consume. That will destroy even if you try to stop it.

It's one thing to know that you love a woman besides her, and another to see you peck kisses along her tearstained cheeks. The rage builds as she watches you cup that female alpha’s cheeks. She watches you brush her hair back from her eyes and tuck it behind her ears. She’s got honeyed skin and smudged lipstick (so inelegant) you wipe her tears away and kiss her cheek.

But what makes Moonbyul’s hands tighten into claws, her metal-tipped nails piercing the coffee cups and making them drip onto the ground, wet and hot, is the way you smile at her.

Moonbyul’s rage is like a tidal wave.

By the time the rest of the pack looks up, the hallway is empty except for a puddle of coffee on the linoleum floor and two discarded cups. One with red lipstick stains and the other without.

~-~

(18 hours later, Jimin)

Tae’s cheek is so soft. That’s the first thing that Jimin’s aware of as he wakes from surgery.

Coming out of general anesthesia feels like being a rickety buoy on the busy ocean. One second bobbing to the surface and the next crashing below the waves and taking on water. Sloshy. Everything feels sloshy.

He only feels her at first- not the hospital bed, not the scratchy sheets, Just the feeling of her cheek resting against the palm of his hand. Her gentle breath tickling his fingers in her sleep.

Jimin will always know the particular beat and cadence of Tae’s body. Would know it if the sun got snuffed out like a candle. Would know her breath anywhere because it’s the very fuel to Jimin’s soul, the very thing that sets the tempo to the heart monitor beating out a pleasant rhythm in the midafternoon hum.

Her skin is pillowy and sweet beneath Jimin’s flayed fingers, limp and cold to the touch because of the whole almost bleeding out thing. He doesn’t know it yet, but he's needed 9 units of blood in the past 24 hours. 4 right away, and 3 during the surgery where they removed the knife and stitched his arm together. And another two units just after.

Compared to his own body, Tae feels so warm.

At least Jimin can still feel his left hand. The doctors that stitched him back together must have done a bang-up job, Namjoon even more so. a lot of people can put an arm back together, a whole slew of them, but not many surgeons could stab someone carefully enough so as to not permanently injure them. There are only so many people that he would trust to stab him.

But Jimin trusts Namjoon with a whole lot more than just that.

When he opens his eyes (a task of herculean proportions) Namjoon isn’t there, it’s just Tae in one of those absurdly uncomfortable hospital chairs. She’s bent over his hospital bed in what must surely be an uncomfortable position to sleep in. Her back arched like invisible wings weigh her down. She slept like that, sprawled as close as she could get to Jimin without the nurses waking her up and telling her not to crowd him.

The smudged mascara on her cheeks flake like falling stars, little trails there were tears rendered it useless. Jimin wipes away a black droplet like he's banishing a ghost. She’s cried so much over the last 10 hours, most of her makeup gone and sporting a bit of 5 o’clock shadow too. The faint roughness that Jimin feels no more than once. Because to derive sensory pleasure from that feels…wrong.

He looks at the ceiling, wondering where the others are. He feels the edge of his body, the spot where the wound begins and the pain ends. Who knew gunshots and stab wounds could make you feel so sore? and tired too? Exhaustion pins his body to the bed like a butterfly to a corkboard.

A wire connected to his good hand tugs, But he ignores it in favor of cradling Tae's head and combing through the tangles in her hair. It's gotten so long now, just to her shoulders, but the bits feel so soft and gauzy against his fingertips. He wishes he could feel it forever. It’s much much better than the 5 o’clock shadow.

It takes a dozen passes for Tae to stir.

And then she startles awake, flinching into being. Fresh tears disrupt the mascara flecks as she beholds her soulmate and nearly tugs herself across his bed to get her hands on his face. To hold his cheeks.

To say that Tae has looked better would be accurate for jimin to say but the words would never grace Jimin’s lips. Not even close. Even with a crusty face and greasy hair- Tae looks gorgeous- so pretty that his heart pulses dangerously quickly. so quickly that jimin's suprised the nurses don't come by and check on him.

Maybe they haven’t given him enough opioids for his shoulder because for a second he feels his heartbeat ricochet through his whole body. To his fingers where he's touching her and back to his heart. Every echo and ripple Tae Tae Tae.

Tae bends over Jimin’s body. Her hands go to his face, fingers touching his smile, and thumbs pressed to his faint crow's feet and twinkling eyes. Clutching at him like he’s her lifeline (he is, a red string of fate that keeps her from drowning, always. She was stupid not to use it like an anchor).

“Pup told me.” She says, a note of finality in her voice, lower lip trembling, tears falling anew “told me you kept talking about me even when you were stabbed" she goes quiet, whispering the words like she's scared someone might be listening in.

"Pup told me everything."

Jimin’s eyes flick from her lips to her face, her body, everything. His hands are trembling, chest building with breaths until they’re heaving and the realization of just how much everything she must know hits him.

Tae knows Jimin well enough to know what a panic attack looks like- knows enough how to soothe it. Knows just to hold on and wait for it to pass. jimin's hands splay and flex, rubbing her skin once, twice, and then a third time in an effort to self-soothe.

"It's okay,"

"You mean you're not-" Jimin's heart monitor is going so wild that Tae has to tell him to calm down. Has to run her fingers up and down his scent glands on his neck, nipping at them to settle him. "You're not angry that I'm-"

That I'm a killer, that I'm a monster. That I've kept everything from you. Jimin readies himself, preparing himself for the speech he always knew he'd have to give. You don't understand, I didn't have a choice, I wouldn't have chosen this- I didn't I just. I never killed people who didn't deserve it- because I know that you'd hate that.

For the first time in their lives, Tae and Jimin are sitting across from each other- without a single secret to each of their consciousness. both of them free and perilously unmoored for it.

But there are no words that Tae needs when she looks up at him and smiles. Wetness at the corner of her eyes.

Seeing Jimin in the hospital bed had not felt like Patroclus and Achilles, it hadn't even felt like Orpheus and Eurydice. There was no roaring anguish. The kind that follows when people leave you too soon. Or the bitter vindication that happens when people leave at just the right time (it’s the worst when people leave like that. Either linger or make me miss you. Stay too long or leave me early. Either way is fine. I’ll feel more human if I’ve got longing or hatred to feel).

In truth seeing Jimin in the hospital bed, wires and hooks connected to him- keeping him alive and keeping him breathing, had felt like a second chance. She's not going to let something as simple as a secret spoil it.

Tae knows she should want to know more about Jimin's job as an assassin and should want to ask more questions (if not to understand her soulmate better, than for writing material). She Should be more revolted or disturbed or upset that her literal soulmate kills people for a living, but at the moment, all she can find in herself is just to be glad that Jimin is fucking alive.

It’s funny, how much your priorities can shift.

Jimin looks like he doesn't believe her. "Tae, you can't even kill spiders."

"Would you care?" Jimin falls silent. "Would you care if it was me in your position?"

Jimin swallows hard and winces. He doesn’t have to ask for a sip of water, because Tae has already gotten it for him by the time his good hand closes over his throat. His shoulder is bound so tightly in bandages that he can hardly shift it. Can't reach up to stop himself from spilling a bit of the water down his chin. Her nails (red polished and chipped) wipe away a drop on his lips.

(There's more that you weren't able to tell her just yet; a lot about you and Yoongi and Jin. You've decided to save the bulk of how Jimin ended up in the hospital bed until after Jimin woke up. Later when you can get her on her own you'll tell her. Probably after Jimin's discharged from the hospital. But the other secrets can wait for now).

It won’t really hit her until later. When she’s in her closet looking at all of her pretty things and designer clothes. Fingers toeing along the fine black cashmere sweaters, to the maroon dresses, to the scarlet ones, stopping just before she reaches the pink. The Dior, the Versache, the McQueen. It will only be then that she'll put two and two together and realize they were all paid for with blood money. With people’s lives.

It will bother her then; it doesn’t bother her right now. It will never bother her enough to think about leaving jimin.

How do you make the choice? What to condemn a loved one for? How do you pin down your line of intolerance when it's someone you love with your whole being? Can you decide at all or is it something that your soul chooses for you? The weight of one sin for another. what you're willing to go through.

They would have died anyway. Even if Jimin hadn't killed them, they had someone out there willing enough to pay for their death and they'd have died anyway she rationalizes. We're all going to die anyway.

Maybe it’s a silver lining that Tae no longer believes in the same kind of sin and wrongness that Jimin does. Doesn’t believe in God and heaven at all. Tae has always believed in soulmates more and believed in Jimin the most. More than any god or afterlife.

“I should be angry, anyone else probably would be but-” Tae turns her cheek into Jimin’s fingers, pressing her lips to his trigger finger. Eyes shining when she looks at him. “I’ve wasted too much of my life being angry at you, wasted too much of it feeling anything but love for you- Jimin- if you died, I-”

Jimin cradles Tae's cheek. “I’m sorry for Namjoon’s rut- for what I said. Didn’t mean it. Never mean it if I'm mean-” Jimin’s finger rubs across Tae’s lips, the wide part of his palm splayed across her jaw, and so much is said in that little touch. But they look at each other and laugh. "Not like Noodle."

It shocks a laugh out of Tae and she presses her temple to Jimin's jaw, feels his smile when the joint moves. She realizes that Jimin's still a little high. Probably too doped up on pain medicine to have this conversation but oh well.

“I never thought it would take you getting stabbed for me to realize it,” her lip trembles, “I don’t want to waste another second being angry with you.”

“I don’t want to waste another second with you either. Won't even sleep,” his eyelashes flutter, struggling to stay awake.

Tae pulls herself more firmly on top of the bed and Jimin shifts a little, wakes a little more when she slings a leg carefully over his hips. Being gentle, still conscious of his physical state. He uses his good arm to pull her up and up until She’s splayed across his lap.

Kissing Tae never loses its edge, it always feels like their first kiss, sweet and with that knotted bundle of anticipation. Jimin sits up into the kiss, sits up until his shoulder protests and he hisses into the kiss. "Don't strain yourself minnie-"

"Don't care just-" he pulls her hips snugly. After that words are sparse as they kiss, again and again, lips working together. Sloppy messy love kisses. Every breath tastes like love, every second of it. She giggles pulling apart for a second to get her breath, the heartbeat monitors in the corner going wild. Breath that washes over Jimin like a gust of spring air, cinnamon flower sweat, and heady. Tae’s kisses are better than a first sip of coffee or a breath of fresh air. (They’re better than living, just a little bit).

“If I was any less sore, I’d ask you to bite me right now.”

Tae grins, and it’s a special secret smile. “You said something like that to Pup too."

“I’m so lucky I get to be yours- don't want to waste the luck-" Tae shakes her head stubbornly pulling back.

"I don’t think that you should say you’re lucky. I’m so lucky that this person loved me, or I’m so lucky that I got to love them. Because when it comes down to it, love and luck are not the same thing. Love is not a single event, like winning the lottery, or finding a 100-dollar bill. Love is a choice and you have to choose it a thousand times. Every day you choose it. Luck is such a cop-out. It’s been really nice.”

“God, I hope I’m more than just nice.”

Tae smiles, “Shut up” She goes a little pale. “Actually don’t shut up with me like- ever. I guess that’s what I’m trying to say.” She plays with Jimin’s hands, “Is that when either of us- whoever- goes first-“ Jimin’s grip goes knuckle tight on her waist, he's coming out of it, a little more lucid with every breath. Waking up more.

“When one of us dies- I don’t want to question if I ever loved you enough, I don't want to rely on just luck. I don’t want to think about the days that I could have gone for coffee with you or could have kissed you longer. I don’t want to think that I didn’t get exactly what I wanted and you didn’t get exactly what you wanted too.

"I want to give you one extra kiss every time so that you get twice as much as you would have gotten otherwise. I just want to think that it was nice, that every moment of it was nice- even when we fought, I want to look back on it and think ‘even the sad parts were nice and I got more than I thought I would.' No luck involved.”

She grins down at him, that same youthful grin she’s had her whole life, Jimin thinks of it sometimes- how many times she’s smiled this way and he hasn’t seen. How many more he will see.

“Also, y/n says that you’re allowed to mate me, but not marry me. She says my ring finger belongs to her.”

Jimin slides up the bed, flipping her over, supporting himself with his good hand, sending her sprawling and giggling. His growl is half hearted but promising. Tae laces her hand in his greasy blonde hair and it stays there.

It stays there.

~-~

The rest of Jimin’s hospital stay goes a bit like this:

There is a pair of suits outside the window, dark and imposing. plain clothes police officers watching and waiting like vultures. They’ve already taken statements from the pack but demand to hear from Park Jimin himself.

Lies from the source always taste the sweetest.

There is a story ironed out and penned in stolen moments, you curled up in one packmate's lap and transferred to another, "the pup" Jin had said, the youngest, was not taking her alpha's stabbing well. "She just needs a bit of soothing, sorry." The suits are charmed enough by two cuddling omega's that they don't notice your mouth pressed to their ears, like a game of cuddly murderous telephone.

The story gets ironed out easily, you’d all gone out for pizza, had come home to find Jimin bleeding in your kitchen.

“It’s pretty normal for Jimin to be reckless with his health. I’m not surprised he tried to come home and see if I could stitch him up himself. I'm a doctor at his hospital- Dr. Kim, pack alpha and head of neurosurgery. The knife- you should know I touched it on accident he wanted to remove it himself and I just had to stop him- I’m sorry- I should have known better I was just- so shaken.” Namjoon is a passable liar at best.

Jungkook has folded himself under your mate’s arm, and Jin’s too. He’s still vaguely shaking, bunny eyes wider than usual. In a little bit, Namjoon will drag him over to an empty exam room for a quick check-up. Just to make sure he isn't about to seize on the floor. Yoongi will go with him, Will tell him the truth about all of this then.

But what, with his comment earlier, you wouldn't be surprised if Jungkook has already figured it out on his own.

Jimin doesn’t even need to be coached into remembering it. The police don’t even think of not letting the pack see him, after seeing Tae’s teary eyes. A pretty girl is the best distraction, and the pack has two pretty girls that smell sour and need to tend to their alpha before the police get a chance too.

They’re impatient as they watch you and Tae fold yourself over Jimin’s barely aware body, more preoccupied with looking at your asses than they don’t see your lips moving against Jimin’s ear, mistaking your shaking for the racking sobs. And your quiet words for sweet nothings.

Hobi had barely leashed a growl, and resisted the urge to step in front of you and block you both from their sight.

The story is so easy and simple- a true case of Ockham’s razor. The simplest story with the least details is the most likely to be believed. the story Jimin tells the police goes like this;

Earlier yesterday, a crazy fan of the idol group he guards that must have followed him from his schedule with intent to learn his schedule and get closer to them. Her description is so ordinary that they’ll never find her because she doesn’t exist. Any person found will easily be made inculpable; either by alibi or honesty. Not that the law cares much about honesty, nor that any of you care about possibly implicating a stranger.

Love always did make people go to extremes, it's easily believable.

Nothing else matters. Besides keeping everyone safe. You're united against this.

Once they're gone, other promises get made:

“I want you to quit, this is too dangerous, if something like this happens to you again, I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle it.”

“We need to make sure we travel in pairs until we figure out what’s going on, why they're targeting Jimin and Jin.”

“I can ask some of my contacts-“

“You’ll do no such thing Yoongi.”

“Do you think we should be like- Armed? Just in case?”

“I don’t think more guns will solve anything but…Maybe.”

In a stolen moment, Namjoon corners you outside Jimin's hospital bedroom, he's holding three bags of takeout, not that Jimin will really be able to eat much of it. The opioids keep down his appetite. That doesn't meant the pack won't try to fuss. As it is, Jimin hasn't been interested in anything but kissing Tae and holding her hand. Pouting whenever the nurses make tae leave.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you earlier," Namjoon has always found apologies easy and has never had so much of an ego that it would get in the way of any of it.

"It's alright, between you and me, I think it was kind of justified." You'd probably yell at all of them if they convinced you to stab Yoongi or tae or any of them.

"No more secrets, okay? Promise me this is the last one." It's easy to promise Namjoon that, so easy. To let him scent you, rubbing his coffee liquor scent all over your shoulder.

(But it's not about the promises that you make, it's about the ones that you break.)

You sit out in the hallway the following morning, still in the same clothes and starting to feel a little bit filthy because of it. None of you have gone home yet. Hobi sits next to you and Jungkook's on the other side.

They’re just checking Jimin’s stitches again, and his hospital room just got a bit crowded. The prospect of checkout is maybe a day away. Tonight is the last you'll have to spend at the hospital.

It was also time to talk over Jimin’s opioid regimen, and the doctor had been nearly delighted when Namjoon had stepped up and taken the lead, reassuring the doctor under no uncertain terms that Namjoon would manage them. You can forgive him for thinking a little too much with his hindbrain. If Namjoon leaned any more into his instincts you'd be worried he was close to going into a rut again.

“Is this what it’s like when I’m in the hospital?” Jungkook asks, sucking on some skittles. It's more sugar than he should be allowed to have especially during a high-stress situation. But Jungkook’s taking the panic to get a little bit of freedom. You cast a glance at Tae, at Yoongi and Jin, standing by the door looking like he’s about ready to twitch out of his skin with the effort it's taking him to stand outside.

Jin had apologized- him and Namjoon both, and Jimin had accepted it instantly. "If I trust anyone to shoot and stab me- it's you two so-"

"But-" they'd argued, but eventually Jimin had turned a little scary, a little threatening. showing a hint maybe- of a persona they're all unused to but you're not. Jimin can be firm when he needs to be. A quick retort of-

"Forcing me to comfort you over something I'm not upset about is not the way to make me forgive you." Shut them up for good (or at least for now).

“Yeah, pretty much.” You hold out your hand for some skittles and he gives you a few. Hobi grimaces and reaches over to take the orange ones out of your palm. He knows you don’t like those. He replaces them with a few green ones.

"It’s fucking boring. I should get you guys like- a DS or something for Christmas.”

“Don’t tell Minnie or he’ll blow all his money on-“ You cringe at your words and Hobi flinches. Jungkook just chews on his candies, they smack against his teeth with a hard clinking sound.

There is still some of Jimin's blood under Hobi's fingernails. You see it when he reaches over to take your Skittles.

The next time Hobi moves to take your Skittles, you grab his hand and pull him to his feet. "Come on."

You lead Hoseok into the women's bathroom, underneath the curious eye of the nurses, all the stalls are empty so you pull him over to the counter.

“You’ve got some- stuff- under your nails- let me.” You rip a handful of paper towels from the dispenser and wet them. You clean Hobi’s hands diligently and he lets you.

He stays quiet, Hobi's been quiet for the last day or so. He hasn't done more than whisper a few quiet words to Jimin and stay close. He didn't say anything during your secret confession yesterday. Didn't ask a single question and the silence bleeds now as you scrub the clean-smelling soap against his skin. Your anxiety builds, and you scrub a little harder. His fingers remain limp in your touch.

“Say something- say anything okay? I need to know that you’re not-” not angry with me. That you don't hate me- that you still love-.

Hobi pulls you against his shoulder in a single clean movement. His wet hands hit your stomach when he grabs your hips. Your nose brushing his throat, his nose skimming your hairline.

“I’m trying not to take too much energy from Jimin- trying not to- be a mess- because he's the only one who deserves the packs attention. I'm not even sure if I am a mess about it. Sure that sucked but-" he sighs, "you and I are kinda like- uniquely able to handle things like this cuz of-" he doesn't need to finish his sentence. Hoseok's lips brush your ear, lips touching your skin, and- he pulls back, smiling softly. It's a tired smile but there it is- soft and special and just for you.

“You’re taking things, remarkably well considering the last time we…”

“The last time we had to deal with something like this?”

You hum, scrubbing a paper towel hard over the ends of Hobi's hands. The white paper goes orange-red with dried blood. "Give it time. There’s still a few weeks for me to go crazy this time.”

But this time, you have a feeling that it will be different. Although Hobi was there the last time- and played an instrumental role in making sure you didn't literally fall apart. It's different now. Right now, your hands tangle on the counter, holding on, even though you try to clean his hands of blood. Holding on is more important, neither of you tries and pull away. You don't have the energy for shyness.

What's more intimate? Sex or murder?

He huffs a small frustrated sound and stoops to rest his forehead against your shoulder, leaning almost all of his weight on you. You take it.

“Maybe this time I’ll take a crack at going crazy.” You laugh, stopping your brushing and just settling for holding him. Hips resting against the counter. The two of you rest, just for a moment.

Your nose against the side of his face where his undercut presses to your skin, spiky. "Still have that train ticket?" Hobi humms, taking a deep greedy breath of your scent to steady himself.

You're not expecting him to pull back and kiss you, but his lips are dry but warm, faintly chapped but yours are too. Pressing soft but demanding against yours. Hobi kisses you just as sweetly as last time and you grip the front of his jacket.

No sooner has he heaved you up on the counter, fingers hooking under your thighs to kiss you stronger- than is the door clanging open and a nurse comes barreling in.

"Ugh- uhm." She's a little stunned, but you're already hopping down, faces flushed and apologizing for the inconvenience.

You don’t throw the bloody paper towels in the garbage, but the toilet, flushing them once, then twice, to make sure that they’re down. Mumbling one last apology before you exit the bathroom together.

Hobi doesn't let go of your hand. You wonder if this is what loving him is going to be like; making out in places you shouldn't, special secret stolen glances when you keep holding hands even around the pack and keep stealing kisses.

You wonder if the kissing will stretch to the cars- to the late night drives, if he'll hold your hand like this around every hairpin turn. If Hobi's going to make you a make out playlist later, full of songs that make him think of you, songs that match the cadence and pitch of your heart. You wonder if loving him will be like this, stolen innocence, like finding sea glass on the beach. There and pretty for the taking if you only look for it.

Your heart feels all warm and tight with it, swaddled. Protected as Hobi tugs you back into Jimin's hospital room. You can't wait to find out.

The next few hours look like this; Namjoon sitting on the foot of the bed his hand on Jimin’s knee, feasting on hospital food. Jungkook giggles, and nearly throws himself across Jimin’s lap so that the alpha can put his hands through his hair. Looks like more takeout, living off of it because no one wants hospital food and you can't go home and cook. You refuse to leave right now.

It looks like Tae smiling for the first time In what feels like years but has logically been only a few hours. Rubbing a hand across her jaw and wincing when she feels the stubble.

Her wince quiets the sounds of the pack happy. And you look up from your plate.

“What’s wrong?” You ask, always stupidly attuned to her and her needs, always watching and waiting.

“I need to freaking shave and I just- I haven’t had the chance to.” Tae lets out a tired sigh, the kind of deep frustration that comes with things that you have no choice but to do.

You take her hand from her chair and tug her up. Because this- this source of angst can be fixed.

“Here- come on,” A shaving razor gets found for her, Namjoon goes to the surgical ward to get the right kind. Sharp and medical and disposable along with a tiny tube of shaving gel. You drag her chair into the bathroom and make her sit while you do it. Lathering up her cheeks and tipping her head back. The whole pack a cacophony in the other room. The shock of skittles and other candies falling onto the floor. Muted words then soft laughter.

You drag the shaving razor up her chin, over her chubby cheeks. Your gentle touch, the soft scrapping of her hair against the blade a gentle accompaniment to the sounds of the pack passing the time until Jimin wants to go to sleep. Jungkook's phone plays a tictok loud, "Bunny- headphones, Minnie's trying to rest" Yoongi reminds him.

Jimin is struggling not to fall asleep, shifting to one side of the hospital bed just to get a better vantage point to look into the bathroom at Tae. Jimin cranes his neck.

Tae's face twitches, and underneath the white froth you see her reddening cheeks. “Stop looking at me.”

Jimin grins from the hospital bed, “Can’t help it, love you.”

“Love you too Minnie” She choruses back, and the pack joins her.

that night, namjoon and yoongi push three hospital cots togeather around jimin's bed and the pack piles in, sweet bodies and kissed cheaks, whiped down with sanitary towels, you end up tucked between tae and hobi, your cheek pressed to her back.

the following morning it becomes impossible to ignore both how purely filthy the 8 of you are and the fact that Jimin's doctors won't let him check out until tomorrow (and even then he'll have days of bedrest and won't be able to use his arm until he gets his stitches out.) You haven't been home in two days, no one can remember if you even locked the front door with how crazy leaving was.

It’s hard to convince Tae to go with you and leave Jimin's side. But she's less resistant when Yoongi reminds her that Jimin needs new clothes to go home in since all of his bloodstained clothing was discarded as medical waste.

“Honestly we should get like- to go bags full of a change of clothes for all of us when like, JK has his seizures,” Maybe it’s just because you’ve done overnights twice in the last week at the hospital- but the idea doesn’t seem like a bad one.

Jin drives you, Hobi, and Tae home in silence; no one tells Tae any of the other secrets yet. Tired as she is, almost falling asleep in the car. Waking with a start when you turn onto your street.

It's a little shocking. When you get home to a cold and quiet house. Jimin's blood has dried up into dark waxy puddles, on the kitchen table and the floor. There are fingerprints from someone, rusty and red on the doorframe. It's stark to see the evidence. To see a bit of it on the butcher block countertop all the terror and the color leached out of it in the grey afternoon light.

Tae is so stumbly that Hobi has to grab her twice just to keep her from walking into walls when he gets her inside. Noodles immediately yowl has you feeling terribly guilty, he circles your and Hobi's ankles. But you push at Hoseok's hands when he stoops to pick him up.

"Take Tae upstairs and shower with her, will you? I'll be up in a second, just gonna feed him and get some stuff together." She's blinking and looking at the bloodstains, eyes already looking glassy with fresh tears.

You need a second, a second in quiet, a second alone just to steady yourself. Jin comes in, dragging in a mountain of mail from your box, "I've got them, come on pups, grooming time."

Jin pecks a kiss along your forehead, "Come up the second you finish?"

You nod, "Just want to get some food first too- hungry."

Jin nods and makes to follow Hobi and Tae but pauses on the stairs. he looks like he wants to say something to you. Eyes full of something unreadable and warm. Unspoken words hover.

If he had to choose anyone, I'm glad he chose you.

But before he can get it out Tae calls from upstairs. "Jinnie? Can you grab one of my comfy sets from the closet down there before you come up?"

You stand, solemn in the kitchen, listening to the sound of them on the creaky stairs, the sound of their quiet voices. The creek of the house as they walk around upstairs.

"Here you go baby," you say, giving Noodles an extra spoonful of food. You know you left enough for him in his bowl and that he didn't suffer too badly. But still, his purring chirping is music to your ears. You pet over his back, his fluffy tail.

He's Still chubby, still good. You aren't too bad of a pet owner then.

There's the gun still there, sitting just to the left of Jimin's blood splatter on the seat of one of the dining room chairs. You're at eye level with it from where you crouch down to pet Noodle. It's the same one that you pulled out from under the bed when you found out he'd been shot. You should probably take it with you when you go back to the hospital, just to be sure.

"You got any secrets for me nu? Are you the long-lost prince of some cat kingdom?" Noodle chops down in response.

You go to the hallway closet to get a duffel bag, where the pack stores their larger bags and luggage.

"Hey!" Hobi calls from upstairs, muffled through the roar of the shower. There isn't much other noise in the house. The birds outside aren't chirping, probably because you haven't been home enough to fill their birdfeeder.

Probably.

"Yeah!?" You call back up, upending the duffel bag and sending a bit of loose change, some quarters and pennies scattering onto the floor. you stoop down to pick up a few of them, tossing them back into the closet with a metallic clang (to be dealt with later.)

“Can you grab Tae's phone charger? It should be by her computer.”

"Got it!" Tae's library room is much the same as it was when you left it, her computer is closed. The walls are green, the window dusty. You find it easily, the cord long and white, tangling in your hands.

You're not sure why your hair raises on the back of your neck.

Noodle stops his chomping.

The push of cold air startles you- the change of pressure in the house like a door being opened- the front door. The windows in the library room are leaky. You're used to being in here and feeling it, used to feeling that same draft every time one of your pack mates comes home.

You freeze where you stand.

The metallic jingle of the doorknob is so much softer than usual. You could almost convince yourself that you don't hear it, that you've made it up.

And then you hear it- Noodle's low hiss.

Call it a habit or a trained behavior but you still make your footsteps quiet everywhere you go. A thing learned from your years with Geumjae when you needed to be quiet to be safe and needed to make yourself as unobtrusive as possible to avoid pain. A vestigial survival instinct.

It serves you well now because no one in the house hears as you slide from Tae’s library through the pantry area, you don’t call out Tae’s name again, or Hobi’s. You don’t know exactly why you don’t.

Your house is an old house and you know every inch of it. You know this house that Yoongi’s built for you from the top of the eves to the shutters, from the windows up top to the ground floor and dusty half-finished basement. You know every creaky floorboard and which steps are the ones you skip when someone’s sleeping upstairs because it always sounds so high-pitched and it wakes Jimin up, light sleeper that he is.

You hear the subtle creek of the floorboards now, the small slide of heavy boots across the wide floorboards. A creak. Someone is about to ascend the stairs, up to where you can still hear Hobi and Tae talking softly. The shower off, they're probably just getting dressed.

Softly, you hear the sound of a heavy boot hitting something metallic, one of the pennies you dropped earlier and missed.

Jin might still be in the other room, that's what you tell yourself. You're just being paranoid. stupid paranoia you almost want to laugh. you're just jumpy from the last few days- that's all. Funny of you, to make it up.

The danger is all in your head.

Only it's not,

Because the first thing you see when you peek around the corner is the pitch-dark barrel of an extended gun.

~-~

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~-~

Notes:

There are some parts in this chapter, some facts about yoongi's family that haven't been touched on since the very begining chapters or jimin's secret chapters and i repeated them just so that people get a bit of a refresher but some of it feels a little monotonous to write! i hope it's not too hard to get through.

in an ideal world i would have given myself an additional week to edit this chapter, it's not the most edited and because of that i feel like it got repetitive or arduous in places.

i'm also realizing that this is like, 9th longest bts fanfic in existence. look it up on ao3 if you don't believe me. i think giving people a refresher of the begining is fair. In terms of the harry potter series (it really is a shame that no one knows who wrote it) we're just into the 6th book in terms of word count if you need that for context.

on that same vein. moonbyuls brief rant that is implied to be transphobic and sorta is- is not a reflection of my views she's just...you know...the villain?

this chapter also literally went from 8k to 14k during editing what the fuck. i stayed up till 2 am to get this done two nights in a row. i have this little nagging voice in my head that says its stupid to care about something like this but i can't help it- i love this story so much. even if this isn't the best chapter.

when the m/c has her freak out in the room where she almost passes out- that is called adrenal fatigue and it's soemthing that i struggle with as someone with ptsd. you know the feeling when you go on a rollercoaster when all of your adrenaline unloads it's self all at once? if i go through that my body goes a little haywire like- dizziness, exhaustion, dysregulation, memory fog, all of it. i still like rollercoasters though so as long i like rest and drink alot of water it doesn't affect me too much.

it's really important that you notice that no one says moonbyuls name during the moment when they're talking about their secrets between namjoon, jin, hobi, yoongi, and the m/c. i'm not telling you why just PAY ATTENTION.

Every time i think about the proverb "The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth." i think of the m/c and how thats her storyline with the family like- she really was like "either you love me or i'll kill all of you" and i think thats cute <3

In terms of why the last don and Beta killed Yoongi's parents- i think it's because yoongi's mother found out that she was pregnant with another beta and the don and beta didn't want to deal with such a divided power. They already had yoongi under their thumb and another possible successor would have over complicated things. Yoongi would have had a little sister, i don't know if he'll ever know thats why his parents where killed- he was between the ages of 16 and 18 when they died.

although this chapter was the least edited in terms of the most recent chapters- i will also say that there are two moments in this chapter- where i 'fuck up' and write things a certian way but heres the thing- they're not fuck ups and they're actually hints so! lets see if anyone notices!!

i'm gonna be honest with you guys the part where it goes "it stays there" left me fucking winded i can't even think about it too hard or else i get misty eyed.

i am catheterizing a lot of emotions writing this i am sorry it took so long to write, there is a reason why this update took a month and thats cuz yeah- my grandmother is dying. She's got cancer and She's 91 so they're not treating it. death is gonna be a /theme/ for me over the next couple of chapters, don't be surprised if I go off on a tangent or if it takes me a second between updates.

i wish i could write the m/c just a little dumber you know?

i wrote this series with the intent to write about people in realistic relationships- showing the moments they make mistakes, the moments they react too much or not enough, the way that trauma affects us all and how we handle it and love. it feels very full circle to have this chapter come out like- this is what bily is about you know? even though they'res alot of dialouge in it.

oh~ shits about to go down~

Mini-Playlist

Dominic fike- acai bowl (kinda hobi and the m/c's song for this chapter, they're going through it)

Hozier- Eat Your Young (Bekon's Choral Version) (this is literally bily's unoffical theme song at this point)

JID, Kenny Mason - Dance now (the beginning when moonbyul setting the industrial park on fire)

Frank sinatra- thats life (the song i picture playing at the end when tae and jimin are talking out their issues).

[rainnsbeloved]

you’re touyas little sister, highschool au, keigo and touya are sophomores. you’re younger than fuyumi, you’re starting highschool, possible ooc lol, etc etc

the way i loved you // hawks x reader

you had just turned 16, which was nothing. Birthdays don’t really mean anything in the todoroki household; some ‘happy birthdays' are shared between you and your siblings, but that's all. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have fun with your friend. it doesn’t mean anything in the todoroki household, but who said outside of it?

getting all dressed up to go celebrate, you never really liked your birthday, but gifts from friends sure as hell made up for it. as you were getting done you were walking throughout the hall making sure your father wasn’t around as you were sneaking.

“Where the hell are you going?” Touya asked looking you up and down with a certain crimson winged guy behind him.

You turned quickly with a shocked look on your face, heart racing a bit. “What? Oh!” you pondered an excuse looking around avoiding eye contact.

“i know its your birthday, but where the hell do you think your going at 9pm?” Touya says putting a hand on his nape rubbing it was a bad habit of his.

You slouched “augghh, would you fuck off? atleast let me do something! Its bad enough its the end of school ON A WEEKEND!” You made sure to tune your voice a bit at the last part. The sharp eyed avian looked around seemingly tricky expression upon his face clearly not wanting to listen to you and your older brother bicker. It was more than obvious that it was awkward for him

but for you it could be nevertheless embarrassing! you’ve always had a thing for him, whether it be that time you answered the door for him in your first meeting, straight up calling him gorgeous to his face while you thought he wasn’t listening talking to touya. the second time he noticed you had a thing for him was when you were 13 around in your door halfway open talking to your friends, normal middle school girl things. thing is, touyas rooms unfortunately next door. or maybe it is fortunate. you could always sneak into his room and read that lame ass diary of his, it never failed to entertain. as you were lying around talking to your friends planning on meeting up later in the day, they asked if they could be the ones to come over. it was rare that they do, you never really did like it when they came over, always passing glances to your shitty attitude elder brother, you couldn’t help but wonder why it hasn’t drove them away already not seeming to care recollecting your thoughts having to make an excuse, and fast.

-

“Nah, can’t. My older brother has one of his friends over.” saying unknowingly as the avian’s ears peaked up at the words.

“Mmm, no it isn’t the senior jin, ‘miko. your big brother isn’t here its the hot one, ya’know, the winged one.” his feathers picked up your facial expressions whilst speaking with a highly red face as he was playing a match with your brother on his console, constantly clicking away at the controller frequently.

“‘s not a crush.” you said deadpanning with a slight blush on your face replying to what toga had to say he slightly picks up what the fanged blonde had to say now.

“mhm, and i totally don’t wanna go out with ochako!” “It’s not that toga..” you said, he could pick up a hint of sadness in your voice as you were about to explained. “Why fawn over someone I can’t-“ touya shoved keigo,

“the fucks up with you? We’re about ‘ta lose!” Touya said slightly aggressively. He lost the ability to listen in the conversation, mind racing wondering what it was, filled with what if’s, and listening to touyas rambles as he kept pushing him gently to get his head back into the video game in front of him. “Somethin’ up with your or something? Your mom making you work another shitty jo-“ cutting him off quickly keigo stood up

“huh? Oh nah, i just realized i got hella homework to get done” he softly chuckles, as he scratches his head and heads for his rooms door “gotta fly, later!”

he leaves touya in the room as his mouth formed a shape of an ‘O’ while it was all too sudden. Keigo obviously making sure to shut his door, he found it a bit unusual. His bestfriend never does that.

He knocks your door softly making sure touya didn’t follow him out the room, he could hear you talkin’ up a storm as you approached your door, look of surprise to see the blond there.

“Uhh, sorry if i was too loud, i’ll quiet down, see ya” almost quickly shutting your door before realizing what he has to say. He nervously scratches his head “Um, so listen.. uhh..” you were kinda scared what he had to say, but stuck it through.

“So i heard you on the phone—“ he continued rambling on. but your mind froze, bones weak. you quickly shut the door right in his face closing it before you nervously fall to the ground face red. how embarrassing could that be? surely enough to ignore him 'til you were 14.

-

it didn’t matter though, cause now you’re here. In a dress a bit too revealing for your age, like a women who's about to go clubbing.

touya continued on with scolding you to get your ass back to your room threatening to tell your mom, you having no choice but to stomp back to your room it was for the better anyway you’d know that when your older.

touya didn’t like the influence you were under, you were troubled. but then again what does a rich kid raised by a rotten man’s core turn out to be? golden or rusted, no inbetween. you called your friends back disappointed you couldn’t make it but to your surprise they were already there sobbing and sending you pictures wishing you were there.

it wasn’t to your surprise when you saw the clock hit 11:57 pm. you already got ready for bed, undoing your hair and taking up the light makeup you had on. you stood at the balcony, trying to catch a whiff of refreshing air although it seems like your suffocating with how overwhelmed you feel by the day you’ve went through

-

A shadowy figure came by through the sides of house, slowly spotting your balcony. it was keigo looking up at you as he waved with that boyish grin he gained years into you knowing him here and there. he seemed so much brighter than he was when you first met him, ‘specially with his dad arrested.

“Yoo!!” he slightly laughs along with it, waving at you along with the charm he had in his smile. “Whats up? You sulking on your bday? Thats no fun” he chuckles at the end hoping to bring up the mood as he flys to your porch.

“so, birthday girl, you upset you can’t see your little boyfriends or something” ‘aw hell’ were your exact thoughts right now, teasing is a thing this hawk knows how to do, especially to you. almost a 2 year streak! would he like a badge? maybe a cookie, you wonder.

“so? “boyfriends” sorry for getting around here and there!” “around?” he giggled a bit. “I’m sure i had more boyfriends then you did girlfriends, takami.”

“oo… last name huh? well, todoroki. its kindaaa hard to have girlfriends when your kinda the star of the baseball team.. y’know..” his teeth made a stinging noise, talking in a obvious joking tone.

“‘star’ you say, please we all know thats my brother, hawks” you looked in the direction away from him, while he yet again lets out a cheeky laugh. in which you couldn’t help but eye roll.

“dabi’s got nothing on me, sweetheart.” and he’s doing it again, stupidly smiling. as he says the most heart clenching thing. all these years and it still hasn’t went away that thing you had for despite the boyfriends you had and slight crushes your heart always belonged to a certain blond.

“Oh, shut up already.” you were clearly bothered by the last thing he said, brows furrowing. “And don’t call me sweetheart, loser!” you said that a tad bit too harshly but who really cares, right?

he scratches his head. “sincerest apologies, your highness” he sighed. “Well, would you like your gift or am i guessing not since i pissed you off so much” this time he weakly laughed.

“Wow, my brother’s bestfriend giving me a gift and not him, how quaint.” “Ooo, fancy words, unfortunately my vocabs not all that wide, sweets” he reaches to a paper in the back pockets of his jeans getting ready to hand you the paper as his wings spread

your eyes widened a bit, his face looked tricky, you couldn’t read whether it was nervous, excited or embarrassed. extending his arm to give you the paper intending to fly off as you take it out his hand

“schoolgirl much?” he chuckles. “I wouldn’t say im your kind” “hilarious” you replied quickly in the usual sarcastic tone you have with him as you extended your hand

“Well, i’ve gotta go, do me a favor and don’t mention that to your brother? I’d be pretty dead if he woulda seen it, dove.” he said mid way through the air, unknowingly looking ethereal.

unbeknownst you were acknowledging his beauty, he flewed off.

you were a bit too scared to open it but anxious enough to do so anyway.

-

“dear, n/n. my sincerest apologies if this isn’t grammatically correct, i know how bad your a stickler for those things especially with texts and how i say your but that’s pretty much besides the point that day i knocked on your door, was honestly mind shifting me to me. it made me realize my feelings toward you sooner and helped me warm up to ya knowing it was mutual ish lol i can’t help but say i’ve feel in love with you thru out all that teasing was honestly love and all that. felt like it was pretty obvious honestly im never as flirty with any girl as i am with you atleast when were alone dealing with dabi would be a pain XP. to get to the point. i think your the first girl i ever loved n i don’t wanna mess it up with you theres so much more i wanna chance to say to your face but i guess ima pussy my bad dove but call me please. xx much love your soon to be hot ass man”

-

along side it with a stupid little doodle of him. your heart was pounding, what you were yearning for finally was being reciprocated. you hear a loud thud at the balconys window turning around to see touya not giving a damn what you were up to

he was prepared to yell but his bedhead self couldn’t be bothered to do so letting out a little whisper yell of ‘get the fuck back inside’ if that isn’t your mean elder brother for you.

a/n: first fanfic EVER sorry this wasn’t proof read made it at legit 5-6 am lol, i hope you guys still like it though! gn

[nyoomerr]

For a prompt:

If you could take one scene from svsss to 'fix-it' what would it be?

my favorite place for fix-its is as a jin-lan city divergence, just like half the population of this fandom, LOL. i've done fix-its there a couple times now, and i want to try my hand at a "the trial happens" fix-it fic sometime in the future, but there's no way i'd be fitting that into a drabble length ahaha 💦

so in the meantime, here's a shorter thing, set when lbh is trying to cure sqq of the sower's rash!

---

In Shen Qingqiu’s defense, he’s had a very, very stressful day. 

Meeting Luo Binghe two years too early, getting accosted by a bunch of no-good Huan Hua upstarts, getting infected with the sower’s curse - there’s just been a lot, okay! By the time he’d made it here, cornered in a dingy alleyway with Luo Binghe looming over him, he’d already used up a large amount of his daily rationed tolerance for bullshit! His face had already started to crack!! He wanted a break!!!

He did not get a break. Instead he got Luo Binghe, suddenly larger than Shen Qingqiu himself, shoulders broad in a way that made his height look far more becoming on him than it had when he was 17 and on the edge of the abyss, a beanpole that had just recently grown tall enough to look Shen Qingqiu level in the eyes. 

Instead he got Luo Binghe, as observant as ever but with far less respect for his Shizun, catching Shen Qingqiu’s wrist and running his thumb over the rash caused by the sower’s curse. 

Instead he got Luo Binghe, his ears a bit too pointed for a human and his teeth more like fangs in his mouth, raising his own hand to those deadly teeth of his and tearing into his flesh, and -

Shen Qingqiu had a defense, remember!! Stressful day, no breaks!!

- and Shen Qingqiu can’t help himself, and raises his free hand up to Luo Binghe’s mouth, too, pressing the pad of one thumb up into one too-sharp canine. 

“They’re so much sharper than I thought…” Shen Qingqiu mumbles to himself, as if he’s making a simple field observation and not sticking his hand in his future murderer’s mouth. 

The hand Luo Binghe has wrapped around Shen Qingqiu’s other wrist tightens, and Shen Qingqiu freezes.

“Haha,” he says, and then very quickly tries to extract his hand from Luo Binghe’s mouth. 

But then - stressful day, no breaks, very good excuse!! - Shen Qingqiu doesn’t actually drop his hand all the way back to his side. Instead, he finds himself hovering useless fingers over the bleeding wound Luo Binghe had torn into the palm of his hand.

“...Shizun?” Luo Binghe asks, sounding a bit like a lost kid and not at all like a blackened emperor on the path to revenge.

Shen Qingqiu lets his fingers make contact, sliding gently through the hot mess of blood dripping from Luo Binghe’s palm. Luo Binghe shivers under his touch.

“...You shouldn’t let it bleed like this,” Shen Qingqiu says. Luo Binghe’s blood is precious, after all - watching fat crimson beads of it fall to the ground beneath them feels like a waste. 

Beneath Shen Qingqiu’s fingers, the wound knits itself back together. He supposes that makes sense - there’s blood all over Luo Binghe’s hand and wrist, and Shen Qingqiu’s fingers as well, now. There’s no need for him to keep the wound open; he can use any of the existing blood to force down Shen Qingqiu’s throat. 

…Fuck, Shen Qingqiu really forgot to be scared of that, just then!!

(In front of him, Luo Binghe is thinking very, very hard. He’s remembering every moment of his childhood when his Shizun had made an ill-advised move to get closer to some beast or another just to get a better look; he’s remembering the feeling of his Shiun’s fingers in his mouth, curious and testing.

Luo Binghe… perhaps has a better idea than his current plan. After all, if his Shizun won’t take him back willingly, then Luo Binghe will simply take his Shizun back, himself - and what better way to attract Shen Qingqiu than with a beast?)

Beneath Shen Qingqiu’s fingers, Luo Binghe shifts his hand, moving it to be palm-down. Shen Qinqgiu frowns, watching Luo Binghe’s blood drip onto the ground faster, now, but - 

But then Luo Binghe’s fingers do something - odd. They were human looking just now, Shen Qingqiu was sure of it, but now Luo Binghe’s nails are black and pointed and curled like claws, and his fingers are shaped oddly up to the first knuckle. It almost looks like…

Shen Qingqiu slides his fingers down from Luo Binghe’s palm to his fingers, taking a couple of them firmly in hand and pressing gently at the base of the claws there.

Fascinatingly, Luo Binghe’s claws extend out like a cat’s. 

“Oh,” Shen Qingqiu says, unconsciously tugging Luo Binghe’s hand up to his face for a closer look. He doesn’t remember the Luo Binghe of PIDW ever having this feature. “Where do they go, normally?”

“If Shizun comes back to this disciple’s rooms with him, I’ll cut off a finger for you to dissect,” Luo Binghe says, as if that’s a completely normal and sane thing to suggest.

Shocked, Shen Qingqiu drops Luo Binghe’s hand and rears backwards, pressing into the dirty alleyway wall behind him. Luo Binghe stares down at him, expression twisted up.

“Is this disciple so despicable that Shizun doesn’t even want that?” Luo Binghe asks, voice bitter. “Which part is so undesirable to Shizun? Following me anywhere at all, or being made to inspect any part of this disciple so closely?”

“Obviously that isn’t what’s wrong, here!” Shen Qingqiu gasps, offended and terrified in equal measure. “What kind of - don’t cut off your fingers to use as bait!”

“Ah,” Luo Binghe says ruefully. “So I couldn’t fool you after all. Was that it, then? Shizun took offense to my attempts to lure him in? Or was it all of it, after all?”

Shen Qingqiu gapes at him, then finally remembers he has a fan and very quickly snaps it open to hide behind. What kind of person wouldn’t take offense to being lured into a trap, ah! If a rabbit knew it would be skinned and eaten once caught, it also wouldn’t like any sort of bait, no matter how tasty!

Aloud, Shen Qingqiu says nothing. Luo Binghe’s expression grows more pinched, his lips pulling up in a sneer, and -

- and ah, his teeth are even sharper, now! Shen Qingqiu hadn’t even noticed!! Had that happened when Luo Binghe had released whatever sort of glamor made his nails look human, too? Was it a physical modification, or only an illusion? Did it break if someone tried to touch it? But, no, Shen Qingqiu himself had touched Luo Binghe’s teeth, and they hadn’t seemed out of sorts, so -

“Do your teeth retract too?” Shen Qingqiu can’t help but ask. 

Luo Binghe lets out a frustrated sigh. “Shizun can experiment with this one all he wants, if he would just -!”

Shen Qingqiu peers out over the edge of his fan carefully. Luo Binghe has been acting seriously, seriously OOC for a blacked demon lord this whole time, and it leaves Shen Qingqiu feeling off balance. Should he try to talk his way out of this? Should he just go back to trying to run for it?

Luo Binghe narrows his eyes at Shen Qingqiu. “If Shizun tries to run again, I’ll release the whole glamor and stand in the middle of the town until you come get me.”

“Binghe!” Shen Qingqiu exclaims. “Don’t be foolish, you - this master hasn’t told anyone about -”

“I know,” Luo Binghe says. “So either Shizun would be able to see a demon that is willing to let him dissect it, or someone else would come along and do that very thing but with far less precision.”

Shen Qingqiu raises his fan higher, nervous. “Don’t talk about being attacked like that,” he scolds.

Luo Binghe hums, pressing in closer to Shen Qingqiu’s space. “Shizun’s right, of course - anyone but him would ruin this disciple if they tried to take me apart. They wouldn’t be delicate enough; they’d ruin all the best parts to study.”

“That’s not -”

“So Shizun should be the one to take charge,” Luo Binghe says. “If you won’t follow me back to my room, I’ll follow you back to yours.”

Shen Qingqiu hesitates. He doesn’t really want to dissect Luo Binghe, of course - he has enough trouble as it is repressing the feeling of Xiu Ya slicing into the flesh of Luo Binghe’s chest from years ago. But he - he does want to know how Luo Binghe’s teeth work.

Shen Qingqiu’s room… is in the same building where Liu Qingge is staying, too. Hadn’t Shen Qingqiu first wanted to hug that battle-obsessed idiot’s thigh to get a strong protector for the future? If Luo Binghe tried anything, couldn’t he just call for help from his own room?

…This is very, very stupid. Shen Qingqiu is glad he has his very excellent and reasonable excuses from earlier. 

“If Binghe wants,” Shen Qingqiu says aloud.

Luo Binghe grins at him wide enough that Shen Qingqiu can make out the odd way Luo Binghe’s teeth sit in his mouth, as if he has a second row of them. 

Fascinating, he thinks, and reaches up to once more stick his hand into the mouth of his most deadly disciple.

Luo Binghe opens wider, letting Shen Qingqiu look, and starts quietly herding them back to the building the Cang Qiong delegation is staying in. It’s… ah, it’s probably fine, if Shen Qingqiu could just look a bit more…

[writingwhimsey]

400 Follower Celebration

In the poll you guys voted for HC prompts. And since my last follower celebration was fun, I thought I would do something similar. So I have a list of Fluff HC prompts. Smut/NSFW HC prompts, and crack HC prompts.

Rules: Select a prompt and up to three suitors for the prompt.

Suitor options:

ikesen: all suitors except Kicho (still haven't read his route and I don't feel like I have a grasp on his character)

ikevamp: Comte, Leonardo, Napoleon, Motzart, Arthur, Vincent, Theo, Jean, Vlad, Faust, and Charles

ikepri: Leon, Chev, Clavis, Jin

Prompts

Fluff:

Suitor react to MC/reader telling them she's pregnant

Suitor takes care of sick MC/reader

Suitor reacts to MC/reader making their favorite dish

Suitor plans birthday party for MC/reader

Suitor as dad

Suitor reacts to seeing MC/reader as bride on wedding day

Suitor and MC/reader getting ready for a date together

Suitor and MC/reader cooking together

How suitor would propose

Suitor reacting to MC/reader playing with their hair

Free Space (any other fluffy prompt you would like)

Crack Prompts:

MC/reader makes suitor wear "pregnancy" belly to see what it's like

Suitor reacts to MC/reader pranking them

Suitor pranks MC/reader

Suitor reacts to MC/reader bringing home unusual pets

Suitor reacts to MC/reader's terrible cooking

Free Space (any funny/crack HC you would like)

Smut/NSFW prompt:

Suitor finds MC/reader's "toy"

Suitor reacts to MC/reader in a bikini

Suitor's favorite position

Suitor's kink

Suitor reacts to MC/reader's kink (pick whatever kink you would like)

Suitor reacts to MC/reader domming them

Suitor reacts to MC/reader wanting to be tied up

Suitor reacts to MC/reader asking to be bred

Suitor's reaction to MC/reader teasing them in public

Suitor reacts to MC/reader's fantasy (you pick the fantasy)

Free space (any NSFW HC)

Hope you guys enjoy and we can all have some fun with this! Any questions, just let me know! And seriously, thank you all for your support! I am looking forward to having more fun with you guys!

Taglist and a few others who might be interested: @zulablaise @limonzu @kisara-16 @tele86 @lovely-bubb1es

@otomewonderland @lucyw260 @selenacosmic @bjorkshire-pudding @eventinelysplayground

@kissmetwicekissmedeadly @aquagirl1978 @lettheratsin @atinyliliflower @venulus

@mllorei @fang-and-feather

If I have tagged you and you don't want to be let me know and I'll remove the tag. Just tagging some people who have supported me :)

edited to fix the tagging issue! Thank you to @mllorei for telling me how to fix it!

[hobicakess]

I’m just dropping a little something that’s been brewing for a while and I have like 4 series that I haven't posted

cw: allusions to past SA, period typical themes, there might be some switches from 3rd to 2nd person ill fix it later.

Just vampire hyung line and their immortal wife. Throughout the years she met them all one by one and she married them all legally throughout the years. Today we’re going to read about her, Seokjin, and Yoongi's story.

First she was married to Jin although she met Yoongi decades before. Though their relationship was still very rocky. Her and Seokjins marriage was strictly arranged by the Supernatural council. Seokjin being an original vampire and her being an original immortal (meaning she was “blessed” directly by the gods to walk the earth eternally) the marriage was for the sake of reproduction.

At first Jin was furious about the arrangement. He was an original vampire. He'd been living way before the council was organized and now they were demanding him. Kim Seokjin. The handsomest, wealthiest, one of the eldest vampires to live to marry a silly human who'd been cheated out of death and they want him to taint his very old and pure bloodline. He was extremely offended at the notion.

But all his protest went out the window when he saw her.

If you couldn’t already tell, Seokjin back then was extremely arrogant, cocky, and selfish. He saw her as a Status booster (as if his status wasn’t already high) having her by his side, this beautiful immortal woman to procreate with— this would make everyone even more envious for eternity so he sucked it up and agreed. He of course would have other lovers just like she already did

Yoongi. Former Emperor Min Yoongi wasn’t her lover at this time, he just so happened to be bonded to her. That bond was only because of the bracelet he wore around his wrist, she tricked him into putting it on only for his safety, Yoongi was devoted to her because of it, and regardless he loved her dearly. He had no choice but to follow her wherever she went and now she’s forcing him to watch her marry.

When she met with the council Yoongi thought she’d disagree but she didn't, which made him beyond furious.

When the meeting ended Seokjin walked to him “Looking forward to sharing, Vampling.” Patting his shoulder, Yoongi's fangs bared as he went to attack the older vampire but she called his name and he had no choice but to follow her like a kicked puppy.

When the two of them were alone, Yoongi slammed her against the wall, his hand breaking through it. “You are mad! You’re really going to marry that entitled pig?” He hissed venom dripping from his fangs. He didn’t know if it was him being an emotional vampling or his love for her making him feel this way. He’s never felt like this before. He used to cut heads off with a blink of an eye, and now he’s crying because he should be the one marrying her. “You would let me sit back and suffer while some random man marries and fucks you like a common whore.''

As you can tell back then Yoongi couldn’t control any of his new found emotions, being that he’d never felt any before he grew up as a king, a boss. emotions were for common folk now here he is.

“Yoongi, I understand you’re upset but don’t you dare call me names. I am simply doing-“ he cut her off, finding another part of the wall to punch, closer to the side of her face this time.

“I’ve watched you burn down villages, I’ve seen you make men tear their own skin from their bone, You’re far more powerful than-“

“Shut your mouth. They mustn’t know of the powers I have possessed. They’ll lock me up for eternity just as they’ve done the warlocks and witches.” Her hands raised to touch his still warm cheeks, she’ll forever miss his warmth when he hits his chilling point.

“ I am doing this for the sake of us, everything I have done these years has been for us.”

Her and Seokjin's wedding was beyond big, almost every supernatural species being invited. It was like Seokjin to go all out like this. While she was being prepped for the ceremony she was saddened, Yoongi had left for weeks and she didn’t know if or when he’d come back, but the wedding still happened without Yoongi and you had no living family so she was alone stuck with Seokjin and his asshole friends and family.

Yoongi scoffed, “If you genuinely want to do something for me release me of these awful feelings.” moving her hands from his face

“If you truly do not wish to be bound to me any longer I will remove your Geumganggo” she reach to unlock the golden bracelet and before she could remove it Yoongi was gone in a flash.

When she met Seokjin father she immediately felt a deep sense of hatred for him and then she felt bad for SeokJin. The reason he acted the way he did was because of the way he grew up and who he grew up with. “Well I Wouldn’t have wanted my son married to an immortal but you currently have the hips to make his children.”

Seokjin's father's eyes drifted to her hips that were outlined in the tight red wedding dress.“Thank you sir.” she bowed with gritted teeth.

“We are family, please call me father.” He grabbed your hand and brought it to his lips when it was snatched away by Seokjin.

“My wife must be really tired, she is still a human after all and we can’t have her too tired out already” his joke made the whole crowd laugh embarrassing her further, he scooped her up bridal style effortlessly.

“Goodnight.” and he zoomed away bringing the two of them into their bed chambers.

She was on the bed, pressed underneath Jin’s wide body. “Hello wife.” He smirked, pushing a coil of her hair back.

“Are you planning to pretend we are actually a happily married couple?” She stared up at him frowning.

“It speeds up the breeding process.” scoffing, pushing him off, stomping on the dresser, taking all her jewelry in angry huffs. He stood behind watching her in the vanity mirror “ You looked beautiful today, and that says a lot coming from me.” turning to look at her ‘husband’ scoffing again.

“Are you immune to not being a.. nuisance?”

“You are upset your vampling lover did not show.” it wasn’t a question it was a statement and it pissed her off more.“Vamplings are emotional creatures especially when it comes to their sires.”

“I am not a vampire, how can I be his sire?” Looking at him through the mirror. “Well I am going to assume you were with him when he first awoke?”

She was with him. Through the aching process of change. Holding cold towels on his forehead while the venom and humanity fought against each other, she was there when he awoke with the hunger of only fresh blood.

Seokjin clicked his tongue, "I guess the human stupidity still stays in Immortals" her frown becomes deeper as she removes the caked up makeup on her face with even more force than before. "Are you planning to frown all night? It is our wedding night."

She sighs, standing and unzipping her dress so it falls to her feet going to lay back on the sheets.

"What is this?" He asked confused, eyebrows raised as he stared down at her missionary position. "I am speeding up the breeding process."

"I cannot do it like.." he waved his hand over you

"This."

"Oh? would you prefer me on my stomach?" She moved herself into a face down position causing the vampire to sputter and the remaining blood he consumed during the wedding rushed to his ears as he pulled at his tie removing it.

"I cannot have you in anyway if you aren't willing." She turned back to him sitting with confusion evident all over her face. Seokjin couldn't believe it. "I was in position?"

"Position doesn't mean willingness, darling" he sighed, grabbing a sleeping gown from the dresser and handing it to her. She stares at him hard, eyes wide and the most vulnerable Seokjin has seen since meeting the immortal. “I admit that I haven't been the kindest since meeting you.”

He swallows hard, kneeling in front of her, helping her step into the frilly gown pulling it over her bare shoulders, skillfully tying the strings in the back of it. “But. I am not that kind of man who abuses his masculinity and forces himself onto unconsenting women.”

When he finished he grabbed her hands “For as long as we are together as wife and husband I will never force you to do anything you won't want to”

Standing and rolling his wide shoulder he adds “Sex wise of course”

She scoffed at him loudly, “And I thought you were being genuine.”

“You're a few centuries late darling.”

[arkhammaid]

— ˚₊‧⁺˖ S-RANKS AND THEIR INHUMAN TRAITS.

fandom. solo leveling

pairings. beak yoonho, choi jong-in, liu zhigang, sung jin-woo x gn!reader

content warnings. s-ranks are not quite human, written in lower caps, not edited/proofread

word count. 1.1k

notes. first solo leveling fic here on tumblr!! i hope you all like it, some food before i focus on the event fics :)

S-Ranks are not only distinguished by the fact that their mana levels are so high that they can't be measured by any means, but also by taking almost animalistic traits. Those are a result of their own high mana reserves and in which way the mana has manifested in them. Each S-Rank is individual and shows different inhuman traits. 

— ˚₊‧⁺˖ baek yoonho. 

beak yoonho is an s-rank, who focuses on transformation magic. while he clearly has the power of a tank, his mana manifests in a weird mix of tiger and wolf

having practiced rigorous control of his mana and with that his animalistic instincts, he’s one of the few s-ranks who rarely shows his inhuman traits

and still, his appearance changed the moment he awakened to a s-rank. canine teeth, his pupils turning to slits when his control slips— those small things bleed through his ‘normal’ appearance 

these traits are the most obvious after baek cancels his transformation, mana still pulsing strongly through his body and only slowly turning him back fully human. the tips of his hair stay white, streaked with black, while his eyes continue to glow and usually round pupils remain as thin slits

when he’s like this, mind still hazy and led by instincts, his words are more like growls, deep and snarling, showing his teeth to anyone who dares to touch what’s his

that’s what happens as well. baek normally hides it well, but post-transformation leaves doesn’t exactly clear his mind, instincts influencing his acts and decisions

you know all of this well, after being baek’s partner for years, you got to know all his traits, those he hides so well. sometimes you wish he wouldn’t, you don’t mind seeing him like this, but baek is careful. he would never dare to hurt you, he fears it, fully knowing his claws could easily sink into your delicate flesh, ripping you apart while his mana lusts for blood. 

baek doesn’t show his inhuman traits often, he doesn’t like showing them, because showing them means exposing them to you, someone who could never survive an s-rank.

— ˚₊‧⁺˖ choi jong-in.

compared to baek, his long time rival, choi jong-in isn’t the one for hiding his less humane traits, but he doesn’t parade them around either. choi is a dragon through and through, sly and with a knowing glint in his eyes

he loves to hoard things, his apartment filled with trinkets, weapons he collected from all around the world, armor, artifacts— everything and anything, if something interesting catches his eyes, he will drag it to his hoard and no one will stop him

choi is a being of fire. the slumbering embers and roaring fires, calm and passionate, he embodies it and it often shows. running hotter than most s-ranks, choi is a walking heater. he himself isn’t bothered by it, but others can get uncomfortable 

and like any other beast, he has fangs and is proud of them. showing off his impressive teeth isn’t something he doesn’t do often, and yet, when the smoke of his cigarettes curls around him, sometimes you can glimpse a flash of them

despite choi being a professional and known for being one of the ‘nicer’ s-ranks, he can have a nasty temper as well. several times you’ve heard him snarl, teeth gleaming, a low rumble in his throat and the heat in the room steadily rising. he has a good control of himself and knows when it’s getting dangerous, choking his own mana and becoming seemingly completely human again. 

— ˚₊‧⁺˖ liu zhigang. 

liu zhigang could be compared to a berserker. he is a mighty warrior, one of the strongest s-ranks known and his blood runs hot, his hunger for blood and battle never satisfied

liu is a berserker, always ready for battle, lusting after it, no matter how strong the enemies are

and like any other proper berserker, he loves weapons. be it any blade, swords and spears, he wants them in his possession, even if he will never use them twice. sometimes his interest in a weapon is just enough to properly ‘bloody’ it, mesmerized by the view of splattered guts and flesh of monsters

war is his calling and it shows. his instincts are wired and completely focused on battles, it’s hard for him to just turn those off. he can mute them, and still he often scares other hunters and ordinary humans with his laser focus

he’s a predator and everyone is his victim, no one is safe. this is what most feel, no matter what liu does. when he was still young, inexperienced, nothing more than a small boy in this large world, he was scared. scared to hurt others, if he could never control this bloodlust

but nowadays, this fear is nowhere to be seen. liu is confident in his skin and he fully embraces his whole being, the fierce mana that has changed him forever. when he grins with a fierce glint in his eyes, own blood already boiling, his whole body ready to jump and tear through flesh… it’s then when he truly shows his animalistic, inhuman traits. 

— ˚₊‧⁺˖ sung jin-woo. 

sung jin-woo has probably the most control of his inhuman traits out of all s-ranks known to earth. and still, he can’t hide them completely, just as he can’t hide his power

there are his fangs, just a bit longer, a bit sharper than normal human teeth. there are his eyes, dark and glowing, his whole body shrouded in shadows— sometimes they cling onto him, sometimes jin-woo becomes a shadow

he’s not feral, bloodthirsty or a slave to his inhuman instincts. he just is someone, something powerful in a human body

a reason why other s-ranks are so careful around him. what kind of power does he have, to completely control his urges, those inhuman traits, while walking among them as if he’s a normal human being. yet he can’t be, not with the mana tightly around him— no matter what rank you are, sung jin-woo is one of the most powerful s-ranks known and everyone can feel that

as can you, not even a hunter, your body devoid of any mana but you can feel it. feel jin-woo’s power, how the shadows cling onto him, how his eyes glint, the mana wisps around him. you can feel it, sometimes see it but rarely, rarely jin-woo shows it. hidden away, in his arms, where darkness takes over him, but you’re not afraid. he keeps you safe, clothed in shadows and mana, while his rumbling chest fills the peaceful silence around you. 

taglist. @keyz-writes , @obsidianjewel , @keqism , @aimixx , @venexus , @themercyverse

if you want to join the taglist, please read this post!

ARKHAM MAID 2023

[writingforsimps]

Midnight Fangs - Poly BTS X Reader (Prologue)

Summary: The werewolves thought they found all their mates. They never imaged they’d met another, let alone that she’d be a vampire.

Warning: Blood, Alcohol, Sex, Breeding, Mate Au Supernatural AU, Poly Au, Unrequited Love, Rejection, Hurt/Comfort, Other… (Specific Warnings not mentioned will be made in each chapter.)

[Series Masterlist] [Your Here] - [Next] <-

You fled from your Nest.

You fled from your Nest, from the people who turned you almost 200 years ago, from the people who taught you everything you know now about yourself. Vampires have very strong bonds, they live with their Nest forever. The people who turn them and the people who are also turned. The two only reason why a vampires nest would be small is because of Hunters. You ran away from your Nest: your home, your family, your providers. Your an idiot. A lone vampire wouldn’t make it without their family.

You’ve heard phrased, phrases like “lone wolf,” and “free spirit,” everyone’s heard those phrases and in those phrases… Lone Vampire, didn’t exist. Every Vampire always said that their was a reason for that.

As the moon rises in the sky, you look at it from under a tree. Glad the sun would finally be gone from irritating your skin more. You hated swearing layers and hats, you sometimes missed the sun on your skin.

Most supernatural creatures were… sociable, but perhaps that isn’t the right word for all of them, it was more… kept to groups. There was a reason for that.

It meant you wouldn’t survive on your own.

-

-

-

Sociable was, however, the right word for werewolves. Wolves love the night, especially full moons. Werewolves were rowdy, social, and loud. You could tell from the howls you’d hear two miles away and from the many paw prints left behind in the mud after a full moon.

They loved many things.

In that love, what they loved and put above all else: their Pack. Werewolves, they had a more… engraved structure to their packs. For a vampire, the oldest is the leader. For a wolf, the most qualified Alpha is.

It’s a common… rumor that vampires and werewolves don’t get along. Cats and dogs as people would say. Wether that rumor is true or not, is up to a case to case Basis. Cats and dogs can co-exist in certain homes, when conditions are met.

Why was he even thinking of vampires? There would be no reason to think more of this subject. Cats and dogs, they would have no effect on his life with his pack. Jin sighs and shakes his head as he looks at his pack, his mates, trying to get rid of the thoughts.

Why would he even want to co-exist with a vampire? Most of them were too… cold, it was like they were searching for weaknesses to exploit. Always turning their noses in disgust, “You smell- horrible- too strong- like dog.” They’d say, while they smell like nothing but blood and death.

“Hey, Jin you okay?” Hoseok asks leaning his head against the omegas shoulder. The beta leaned onto the omegas scent gland, trying to soothe the Omega. He could smell a bit of his confusion and disappointment, even if it was the slightest, most minuscule change.

“Yeah, just thinking.”

“Joon and Jumin are in the garden.” The beta causally mentioned. As the two of them looked out at them in the over grown, neglect garden. Jimin trips over a bed of something the pack doesn’t care to identify. Junjook stumbled after him and trips into the plants.

“I think the garden has seen better days anyway.” Yoongi shrugged scratching his messy hair as he walked in to the kitchen. A empty cup of coffee in hand, the alpha sighed as he glanced out the window at what was suppose to be a garden.

It was a large fences off area near the back of the cabin. The pack had picked the cabin up once upon a time, it was run down and old but now it was new again, everything was working the way it was suppose to and now it was… perfect. It felt like every room was brimming with love. The garden however, no one ever got around too. The forgotten space in the back of the house. During a full moon a while back Junkook had dug the remaining dead plants up leaving behind a pile of dirt. The pile of dirt was left, the causal “I’ll get around to it” was thrown here and there. Sure, but they all knew no one would end up taking responsibility for the garden.

If they wanted to be in touch with nature they’d go on a walk in the woods. It’s in their nature, Not planting. Digging? Maybe, yeah sure. But if they wanted berries they’d go find them in the forest. It was a waste growing them when they can just go to the store anyway?

At least. Those were the justifications. Truthfully, they didn’t know why they left it untouched for so long. It was a nagging ache in their chest… as if something wasn’t right and it just… needed to be left alone.

______

Note: Hey, so… I made this because, Bts fanfiction is really easy to find and I’ve been reading it because- hey, I want to read a specific type of fic? Bts fandom has 20 of them at least! So I thought, I’d give back…? I mean the authors are all sooo good, I just hope to live up to them. But… I don’t really know a lot about the boys? I’ve watched interviews and tried my best! But if something’s off, tell me pls!

Enjoy the series! Any questions, thoughts or concerns pls don’t hesitate! And uh… bye!

[plush-rabbit]

Dating Headcanons for Himiko Toga

Request: Could you possibly write headcanons for Toga with a fem civilian s/o?

A/N: I love her design so much!! I love her fangs and bangs and her eyes!! She’s so cute!!

-

Himiko loves with her entire being. She never meant it to be twisted or malicious, but certain upbringings and repression has made it out to be so. Having her as a partner is a dangerous one, she’s a villain- a young one at that. She is unstable, but she never means for her own obsession to hurt you with malicious intent. She can’t control it, she loves too much- too wholeheartedly. 

Perhaps she has a type looking at her past two most obvious crushes. She likes to think that she doesn’t- that she loves people and all that they are, but she likes convictions. That’s what attracted her to the young two promising heroes, how far they were willing to go for the other, but you aren’t a hero. You’re a civilian, and it's been a long time since she actually liked anyone like you. But she becomes lovestruck when she sees how kind you are. 

There’s a panic around the area caused by her and the others- people push past one another and somehow she’s been caught in the middle of it, pushed to the ground where her bare knees become scraped. The crowd disperses as soon as she's in the ground, and she’s not astanger to scrapes and cuts, but the knee injury hurts just a bit too much, and any pressure on her ankle makes her think that she might have twisted it. She’s taken in a sharp breath, ready to brace herself and move forward when a hand is held out in front of her. You must know who she is, when you hold out your hand to her when she’s fallen, there’s no doubt that even with her attire, there has to be some common sense in your head telling you to run the other way. Instead of doing the most logical option, you help her up, and hold her hand in yours for just a moment too long, until you pull away and mumble an apology, running the other, leaving her in the middle of the desolate plaza, with her heart beating against her chest. Late at night, she lays awake thinking of you, fisting the hand that you held and covering it protectively with her free hand. 

She wishes that it were more of a challenge to find you- you’re too predictable, too easy and unaware of your surroundings, especially after an attack where you happened to be at. Fortunately for her, you walk home alone for a few blocks and that’s when she makes herself known, grabbing at your hand, and pulling you close to her. You’re startled, but not scared, and you let her lead you into an alleyway where you certainly don’t belong. She’s infatuated. Lovestruck. Obsessed. You aren’t scared of her. You’re letting her hold your hand. She already knows you’re kindhearted. She knows your name. She knows your schedule. She introduces herself, and when you reply back with your own name, she wraps her arms around you, already giving you a nickname, one dripped in sugar and everything nice.

There’s only so many places the two of you can be together without raising suspicions, and your family has already started to wonder why you keep going to the playground at night, so that location has to be shelved until further notice. Other than that, you often go wherever she leads you to which happens to be the current location of the League hideout. They didn’t take too kindly to you at first- Twice, or Jin- being the most harsh in wanting to keep you out of any type of League affairs. You later learn that he and Himiko have a rather close relationship, so you understand the brash behavior and reservations that he may have about you. The both of you usually meet up together after school. While you do your homework, she likes to peer over your shoulder and help with whatever she can. When you have passages to read, you like to read them outloud to her. She’s always happy when she gets to hear you read to her no matter how boring the story may be because she can rest her head on your shoulder.

No matter how sweet she can be, she’s still obsessive. Her questions always start off innocent enough- how did your day go? What did you learn? How was gym class? Who were you with during lunch? You’re not getting bothered are you? Is that teacher still giving you a hard time about your grades? She needs to know how your day went, and when she doesn’t know, that has her worrying her bottom lip. She cares too strongly, loves too fiercely. When she notices that you’ve had a particularly draining day, she holds off on the questions, instead taking you into her arms and resting her cheek over the top of your head. 

It comes to no surprise that she’s an affectionate person. She loves to have her hand on you in some type of way. Your hand will be in hers, and she;ll press her palm against yours, comparing the size and slowly intertwine your hand with hers. Whenever you do your homework there at the hideout, she sits next to you, mumbling about how she always hated homework, and what subject she was the worst at. Sometimes, she’ll get a forlorn look in her eyes, and when she realizes that you;ve been staring at her, she’ll press her lips against your cheek and rest her head on your lap, asking you to read her the chapter of the day. 

The rest of the League- once they get used to you and agree with each other that you probably won’t rat them out- do they actually tease the young member. It did take a while for the rest of the League to become comfortable with you and while you won’t admit it to your partner, you’re positive that they each gave you their own version of a shovel talk. During the threats, a part of you thinks that it’s nice that she found a family within them, how they all care for each other without actively saying it. Most of them didn’t even actually have a full conversation with you, only showcasing their quirks in front of you and you quickly understood that that was a threat. 

With her quirk, she feels the need to have to suck on blood. And being around you can be a struggle. There has to be restraint, especially since she doesn’t want to scare you away from her. There’s been a handful of times where you’ve gotten a cut in front of her, and each and every time, she watched you with unblinking eyes. The scent of iron is thick in the air no matter how little the cut was, and there’s a heavy flush that reddens her face. She hardly makes a sound, and it reminds you of a predator watching their prey, with how her pupils dilate and how silently she moves. She leaves the room for a few minutes and returns as if nothing has happened, asking you if you’re okay and giving the bandaged wound a kiss.

Whether you give her a taste of your blood or not, she understands both decisions and she doesn’t press. She won’t ask for a drop of your blood. She’s loyal to you, and she just likes to be around you- more than she would have ever realized. If you were to offer your blood to drink to Himiko, she takes it as a great show of your relationship with her. She’ll take your arm and ask how you would like to do it. She could give you a little cut, or bite down, or press her needle into the soft of your elbow- whatever it is that you choose, she’s fine with that fact. Either way, she takes your hand in hers, twisting it around and kissing at every inch of skin that she can, mumbling how she's thankful for having met you. There’s still red beads of scarlet that prick from your skin, and watching you, she swipes the tip of her tongue across the wound, pressing a kiss into it and mumbling how she has to clean you up now. There’s a lovely look in her eyes when she glances up to you, her pink dusted in pink, and only deepening when you kiss her.

[blackmoonlightexpress]

Fun Facts behind TTEOTM!

Creative Team

Till the End of the Moon is the second TV drama produced by newcomer Otters Studio (獭獭文化), which was originally set up for dangai/BL drama Immortality (皓衣行), also featuring Luo Yunxi.

The Hangzhou-based Otters Studio is a subsidiary of Nanpai Entertainment (南派泛娱), the company owned by Kenneth Xu (aka “Third Uncle" 南派三叔). Xu is best known as the novelist and screenwriter behind "Grave Robbers' Chronicles" (盗墓笔记).

A big part of TTEOTM's core creative team also worked on Immortality. And a lot of the Immortality team came from Ashes of Love (2018) with Luo Yunxi. This includes...

He Fang (Screenwriter) - Immortality

Luo Xuan (Screenwriter & Associate Producer) - Immortality

Huang Wei (Costume Designer) - Immortality

Guan Dazhou (Music Director) - Immortality

Wang Yirong (Lead Producer) - Immortality

Wang Haiqi (B Unit Director & Action Director) - Immortality & Ashes of Love

Tsang Mingfai (Makeup Designer) - Immortality & Ashes of Love

Shen Xufei (Special Effects Director) - Immortality & Ashes of Love

Hua Tian World Concept - Immortality & Ashes of Love

Wang Haiqi was the stunt coordinator who trained Luo Yunxi in Ashes of Love

Part of the creative team came from Huanyu (Bai Lu's management company, aka the production company of Yanxi Palace). This includes award-winning art director Luan Hexin, Huang Xinyao (Yue Fuya) and Liu Min (Nan'an).

This is the second time Luo Yunxi and Bai Lu have paired up in a drama. They previously played a couple in modern workplace romance Love is Sweet (2020). Bai Lu expressed interest publicly in pairing up with LYX again in a costume drama numerous times.

In addition, a number of Love is Sweet actors have minor roles or cameos in TTEOTM:

Zhao Yuanyuan (Qiao Na aka Yuan Shuai's colleague who has a crush on him) plays the Moon Goddess

Cheng Chang (Jiang Jun's father) plays Ye Xiwu's father

Deng Jinghong (Jiang Jun and Yuan Shuai's shady client) plays Ye Xiwu's brother Ye Zeyu

The popularity of TTEOTM has generated renewed interest in Love is Sweet on iQiyi. In the first half of 2023, Love is Sweet is ranked #5 on Yunhe's "old/classic drama" list, receiving 360M views (10M views/episode), equivalent to airing a new medium-budget drama.

Two actors in Ashes of Love also have minor roles in TTEOTM:

Wang Yifei (Shuihe aka peacock princess in Ashes of Love) plays the Devil God's lieutenant Siying

He Zhonghua (Heavenly Emperor aka Runyu's father) plays the King of Sheng, again terrorizing Luo Yunxi's childhood

In addition, a number of TTEOTM actors play minor roles in the unaired Immortality:

Huang Yunyun (Yue Yingxin) plays Song Qiutong

Zheng Guolin (Qu Xuanzi aka Susu's father) plays Jiangxi

Huang Haibing (Zhaoyou) plays Nangong Zhangying

He Zhonghua (King of Sheng) plays Nangong Liu

Geng Yeting (Ye Qingyu) plays an unknown role

Production

The source novel (黑月光拿稳BE剧本) was optioned by Otter before it was complete due to strong early hype around the IP and interesting characters & premise. It's one of the top 10 most-saved web novels of that genre on the Jinjiang platform. Its title literally translates to "black moonlight is guaranteed a bad ending screenplay".

The screenplay was written for 40 episodes, which was edited into 50 episodes of probably 45 mins each. The original plan (based on governmental records) was to air 34 episodes as part 1 and 16 episodes as part 2. However, the NRTA (Chinese government agency that regulates TV) closed the loophole around airing two seasons back to back early this year, which is why TTEOTM was edited back down to 40 episodes of 55 mins each so that it could air in one go.

TTEOTM changed its Chinese title twice. It was originally named 月照千峰为一人 (The moon shines for one person). It was then renamed to 长月无烬 (long moon without Jin/ember, also a pun for without limit or endless), which is the official publication name proposed by fans of the web novel. Right before the booting ceremony, it was renamed 长月烬明 likely for auspicious reasons (especially after the LYX accident and Immortality not airing)

Some keen netizens have noticed that if you break apart the characters of its Chinese title, 长月烬明, it becomes 长月火尽日月, which literally means....

长月 (long moon) - how people refer to the drama, in its short form

火 (fire) - Chinese internet lingo for explosive or popular

尽日月 (to the end of sun and moon)

(Gotta give one to Chinese people for coming up with auspicious names)

Luo Yunxi was injured right before production began when filming his final scene in Light Chaser Rescue. He got punched in the mouth by a costar which required emergency surgery and left a scar on the top left corner of his mouth. Production was delayed as a result. Bai Lu had to film her solo scenes first starting Oct 19, 2021. The booting ceremony took place on Nov 6, 2021 after Luo Yunxi joined the set.

Luo Yunxi was the first actor to be cast, according to an interview with the producer. It is rumored that he might have even picked which novel to adapt as Otter initially optioned both "Black Moonlight" and "Black Lotus Casebook". Bai Lu is also the "only choice" for Li Susu according to Yu Zheng.

Yin Tao (Who Rules The world, Love & Redemption, and Ancient Love Poetry) was originally considered for director, but he worked on the Blood of Youth instead. In the end they went with Kuk Kok Leung, an award-winning veteran TVB director who has adapted 7 out of 8 Jin Yong novels. One of the Cantonese songs Luo Yunxi kept singing on set is the OST of the 1983 Condor Heroes where Kuk served as Assistant Director.

Sun Zhenni (Pianran) and Zhao Shiyi (Fuyu) won their roles through open casting call. Sun Zhenni was a big fan of Bai Lu, and the two became close friends during the shoot. She is 1/4 German Jewish through her paternal grandmother.

Chen Duling (Ye Bingchang / Tian Huan) briefly dated Xichao Wang (who plays Jing Mie, the demon god's other lieutenant). They were apparently introduced by Yu Zheng (boss of Bai Lu's studio).

Luo Yunxi and Sun Zhenni are the only actors who dubbed themselves in the drama. Bai Lu is dubbed by Duan Yixuan, who is also the voice behind Linglong in Love & Redemption.

This is the second time Luo Yunxi plays a dragon god (Runyu is the first). This is also the second time Bai Lu plays a character who leaps off the tower to her death in a costume drama.

Post-production was rumored to be delayed and then rushed due to a number of reasons, including covid which hit the special effects team hard and the last minute change of the 40-episode rule.

Promotion

During the premiere day, celebrities posted on Weibo to promote the drama in support of Luo Yunxi (usually actors only ask for this favor when it's a really important project to their career): Huang Xiaoming, Tan Songyun, Wu Jingyan, Chen Yuqi, Cheng Xiao, Victoria Song, Zhang Ruonan, Huang Xuan, Chen Yao. The most noteworthy ones were Chen Xiao (whose drama was also opening on the same day) and EDG (the esports team that LYX supports)

[floydsteeth]

Ok so I finally finished asking my mum about the characters fashion I'll ask my aunt about it another time, first I'd like to state that unlike my aunt who does fashion history as a job(there's probably an actual name to the job I just don't know it) this is just a hobby for my mum, also that both of them specialize in women's fashion

here's what my mum had to say on each of them

Sariel- mostly modern (boots, pants, belts) slightly 17hundrends, the knotwork on his jacket(?) Seems military inspired

Jin- looks like he's wearing jeans, good shoes, late Victorian and his shirt & tie looks 1920s

Chevalier- modern take on cavalier(16 hundreds)

Gilbert-"oooh oh no it's really looking like a nazi uniform, but his cane is gorgeous" that's all my mum wanted to say about him

Clavis- regency (purple jacket) white jacket looks like a great coat (still worn today most common in late 16 to early 17 hundreds) pants look like modern dress pants

Silvio- buccaneers (16&17 hundreds privateer) shirt regency, "those boots are just a mess"

Leon- "he looks like captain Harlock from albator", modern dress pants, military inspired, jacket looks modern

Keith- Spencer(a type of women's jacket during regency) modern pants looks like it had a fake fall front, looks militarily inspired, waistcoat looks modern

Rio- outfit one(commoner) "can be anywhere from modern to Victorian, so just generic"

outfit two(attendant) Victorian evening wear "oh that's a gorgeous tail coat!"

Outfit three (prince) button up looks Victorian enough, modern dress pants with a fall front, the tail of his jacket look like court wear from Louis the 14th, looks like he's wearing a jabot (necktie(not a modern one though))

Yves- waistcoat 1870s evening wear, modern pinstripe dress pants, look like cavalier boots but too short, Italian Renaissance linen shirt

Licht- modern pants, military inspired "its a mess"

Nokto- fancy trench coat, sleeveless tail coat??? Modern waiste coat, 1970s button up shirt & tie, modern dress pants, modern shoes

Luke- looks like he's dressed in knit fabrics (modern) pants look like jeans

Overall she said that all of them look to be wearing modern pants

I hope you guys don't mind being tagged @fang-and-feather @lorei-writes @sh0jun

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

My memory is terrible so I wanted to do a breakdown of my stuff every once in a while. Might be monthly, might be whenever I feel like it.

QL - Currently Watching

🇹🇭23.5 [11/12] - This show is not working for me anymore. Of course I'll finish because there's only one more episode but honestly I don't really care if any of them are together and that's a problem.

🇯🇵25 Ji, Akasaka de [5/10] - I'm so normal about this show. The way this show is using the show within the show is really smart and the editing is very good. I'm actually looking forward to see how the 'rival' will shake things up, which is odd for me.

🇰🇷Boys Be Brave [2/8] - So far so good. Gi Seop is obvisouly not the best boy but there's something about his energy on screen that is compelling to me. I really liked that Jin Woo was honest about his feelings and I like the 'I love you but I don't like you' dynamic a lot. The second couple gave me some ODS vibes so I'm bracing for some angst. [Finished will write it up at the next round up]

🇯🇵Living with him [6/8] - Filler episode with not a lot of new information, but I did enjoy the supermarket scene. I continue to delight in Kasuhito's expressions.

🇰🇷Love Is Like a Cat [2/12] - I'm waiting to binge this one. Didn't like how this started and the rhythm just isn't working for me. [Finished]

🇹🇭My Stand-In [1/12] - Pretty is pretty. But I don't trust Thailand with high concept so I have reservations. I hope I'm wrong. I liked the first episode so we'll see.

🇹🇭Only Boo! [7/12] - Well the Shone thing was what I feared and I don't think it really fit with this show at all but now it's over and I'm ready to forget it ever happened. Moo continues to be an absolute delight to watch and I'm looking forward to seeing a more relaxed Kang. The sides are pure torture. Payos sweetie, you need to confess or let it go cause I can't take it anymore.

🇹🇭We Are [8/16] - I'm enjoying the friendships in this a lot, it all feels very natural when they are together. I'm not super invested in any of the couples, although they're all doing a good job. I'm having a good time with Tan/Fang (Aou is so fun to watch) and hopefully I will have a good time whenever the show decides to give me Chain/Pun. I also think some of the actors have really improved, I was really impressed with Satang specially.

QL - Finished

🇹🇭1000 Years Old - I wrote before that this one wasn't really my thing and obviously the finale didn't really change that. The different lifetimes I think could've been explored earlier and would probably make this a bit more interesting to me. It's not like there was too much going on to use the time for that but it is what it is. Also the whole thing with the vampire girl/wife, it was so unexplored that I didn't really get why all of a sudden I should care about her at all. All in all, it started fun but halfway through it lost me a bit and now it's over. Bring on the next vamps.

🇹🇭Deep Night - This one surprised me a bit. There was a refreshing amount of good communication and they gave the people what they wanted, poly and older lesbians. I wish there were more acrobatics and the editing was weird in places but overall it's an entertaining show.

🇰🇷Gray Shelter - This is weird one. Because I feel like I have to fill in the gaps myself and that just shouldn't be the case. I enjoyed the actors a lot, and Lee Jae Bin presence on screen kept me engaged for most of it. There is definitely potential here if they had the time to explore all the different elements. But this runtime it's just not enough to fully flesh out these characters and the complex issues it wants to tackle.

🇯🇵Love is Better The Second Time Around - Started great but lost itself by the end. I don't think it needed that external conflict by the end with the brother and the mother because they weren't on firm ground to begin with. If I were to make a list like this one by @lurkingshan I don't think Myiata and Iwanaga would make it there. Iwanaga was amazing to watch though. He pretty.

🇯🇵My Strawberry Film - One pining gay boy does not a bl make. With that said, even as a drama there's nothing interesting here.

🇹🇭To Be Continued - Meh. It was fine. I wish I had more of the side couple because Gumbie is adorable. Midway this was getting into The Promise territory, and while it's not that bad, and I guess the reason for the separation is a valid one, I don't think Achi being the 'bad guy' for most of the show actually makes sense.

🇹🇼Unknown - The last two episodes were a bit of a letdown if I'm honest. I have nothing to say about the first 10 episodes. Incredible. The character growth is so well done, and the family scenes feel very grounded. Just all around outstanding work from the whole cast, but specially Kurt and Chris. I think Kurt showed Yuan growth so well and I'm in awe of Chris' acting all the way through. Even with the little stumble at the end this show and these characters will stay with me for a while.

Rose Watches OJBL

Junjou (2010) - Second chance romance. I liked it. It's a nice watch, nothing particularly outstanding or new about this one, although that's not really fair considering it's more than a decade old, but alas I've seen other versions of this particular type of bl. Nevertheless I liked the characters, specially Tozaki,

Athlete (2019) - The visuals were the best part for me. There are several things I like in this, the main actor does a really good job imo and I truly enjoyed the bar scenes. But it doesn't all come together for me. I don't have a problem with the ending as much as how we got there.

Other - Watched

This was a slow month for me. I started a new job and some other stuff happened so I haven't really been in the mood to watch new stuff. Mostly comfort watches and rewatches. Oh I did watch Heartbreak High S2. It was good.

That's it for right now. My ask box is always open. Wishing you all a wonderful holiday tomorrow💜

[names-for-alters]

Hello one and all, alters and headmates! I am Charlie! I like to make lists! I also hoard names! Are you looking for a name? GREAT! You can send an ask and request a specific aesthetic or origin of name, or you can look at my list!

With that said…

…Cracks knuckles…

Findo Tach Tails Flicker Tracer Kat Iris Blu Brick Arlo Sammy Artie Finn Stein Aleksandr Vora Olive Luna Nyx Cyrus Qrow Orian Cello Onyx Skye Grim Opal Dawn Azure Fish Bones Poppy Bronze Eggs Sparky Specs Snickers Trout Navi Bingo Chili Bandit Stripe Busker Socks Brandy Frisky Winston Lucky Chucky Bently Judo Rusty Max Honey Indie Calypso Striker Merle Moxxie Vex Ant Bugger Bee Spider Tails Hook Indigo Amber Coco Coral Scarlet Ivory Jade Ruby Emerald Chuck Loden Copper Hamelin Neo Shepard Cinnamon Visor Macalister Soul Hack Hiccup Flynn Rider Astrid Jay Raven Robyn Bolt Dagger Viper Tracer Cornwall Flock Sapphire Crystal Ghost Mochi Trick Catra Rose Raven Flip Chani Racket Red Crimson Dragon Runt Scotch Tellie Gator Croc Crow Goat Duck Creeper Kuma Jet Jeep Draco Poppy Sombra Raine Squish Spike Blaze Ender Drake Sandy MK PJ DJ CJ MJ King Creak Shadow Clay Dusty Miles Dart Willow Antonius Husk Moth Cypher Jin Yin Yang Daisy Gray / Grey Alistair Halo Angel Cake Fennec Fox Null Lull Bastion Lucky Sun Star Cosmo Tweety Vox Nerys Sonic Bark Birch Oak Cherry Blossom Peaches Velvet Shell Coffee Valley Fang Moot Redpath Pudding X V Jr Ether Fig Trunk Joy Frogger Snowflake Snowball Snow Jumper Racket Flare Vendetta Loonie Coin Six Eleven Tropica Stelina Mojave Ink Sud Fender Zero Pollen Wysteria Page Ozias Rex Tortch Buck Nickel Stripe Lynch Tramp Wolf Pup Tank Jhariah Kharma Zenith Sparrow Prism Lemon Mune Lamb Pyke Diamond Parker Graves Fizz Nugget Melody Tink Blight Fangless Ambress Vulture Eclipse Luka Bangle Constance Constantine Sommar Babble Clank Bobble Chipper Aidan Slate Tin Twire Zephyr Silver Misty Faunus Atlas Birdie Brook Cedar Chip Coal Daisy Ember Faye Fate Fern Flint Harmony Helios Ivy Junx Kit Lyria Phoebe Piper Lady Beacon Elos Rumble Ida Cross Zed Scootie Smidge Clauger Happy Sonny Hath Soldier River Song Clawtor Videl Legen Onen Chunk Reid Pop Cobra Cash Clover Saris Volante Donna Belladonna Gale Chopper Morphias Vidia Loft Kape Levi Licker Howl Dustin Newt Creek Breezy Polaris Blight Archer Sirius Warren Dream Goon Cookie Ranger Amity Jericho Viggo Besko Asra Alice Olaf Mossfeld Issic Missy Rascal Creasy Nonya Hex Pita Miguel Manuel Rayburn Daisy Dash Lucky Becky Steele Cylo Featherstone Kingston Netherfield Reacher Saltburn Quick Rubble Dust Brimstone Humble Ado Grover Norvanos Leshy Blade Cooper Calcium

Leo

Leonardo

Lebony

Silver

Linzier

Pearl

blackberry

Tatin

Bud

Raphael

Pebble

Mina

Linda

Oolong

Daeo/Dayo/Dao

Inco

Ketlyn

Risa

Ines

Lora

Flock

Lux

Rix

Reah

Destinty

Bet

Ange

Krixa

Lalien

Gloom

Bug

Rozy

Mars

Screech

Jenny

Robert

Patrick

Pierre Rosemary

Henderson

Mayfield

Sinclair

Sullivan

Hart

Solace

Daughtler

Stoll

Gatlin

Yearwood

Amos

Graves

Rothschild

Halley

Spektor

Presley

Redd

Blackwood

Notvletti

Valerie

Milo

Marian

Lychee

Aiden

Nova

Vel

Bel

Yuri

Puro

Pluto

Ramona

Angel

Nada

Shen

Mog

Hania

Udge

Kinetic

Kikos Wathel

Dupa

Sierre

Jimor

Teddy

coc

Scara

River

Shade

Foenem

Duck

Emily

Toast

Reunna

Ichigo

Rae

Sonic

MoonL

Lennus

cabaran

Marto

Leveer

Granite

Tongle

Gavril

Luella

Malachite

Leonard