#farty thoughts

[lotusfartstwice]

It’s almost leevember!!!!!

[lotusfartstwice]

I would have either had Rock Lee die in part one or maybe die in part two.

I recently watched this video and I’m kind of a fan of Lee opening the 7th gate and swooping in to kick Madara in the ribs again. Not sure if it’s ever spoken about in the manga, but if I remember correctly, in the anime Lee tells Tenten in disappointment that he can only open up to the 6th gate despite his training.

So like...Gai does his thing with the 8th gate and Lee watches and sees Madara about to finish his teacher off. Then boom! The technique, dangerous as it is, taught to him to use only when precious people are in danger he finally manages to get to the 7th gate. And it’s like sort of a callback to Gai swooping in during the chunin exams. Only this time Lee will protect Gai.

He wasn’t able to protect Neji but maybe...maybe he can protect Gai from Madara. He’s accepted that Gai will fall to his own doing but he won’t just stand there letting this monster recover. Get him while he’s somewhat weakened. So he manages to get some hits in (and Naruto can save Gai) instead of just...standing there.

But other than that...actually make his character mean something. Make the embodiment of hard work actually pay off. I don’t expect him to defeat the big bads but like...if you’re gonna introduce villains that cannot be touched with jutsu so the answer is taijutsu...only to not use your supposed “taijutsu master” is just so frustrating and stupid. Why is he here??? What is the point??? Why give him a title that is meaningless.

Rock Lee should have died then at least he wouldn’t exist to be a joke.

If you could change one thing about your favorite character's story (that has NOTHING to do with shipping) what would it be?

[sunflowerchester]

It’s time for a heavy hitter! This week Audree, L, and Vic cover Croatoan. This episode is stuffed full of character analysis and discussion, which is why we let S02E09 of Supernatural have its own ep of our pod. Don’t forget to check out the visuals for this episode on Instagram, drop comments of your thoughts on our takes, and rate/like and subscribe on whatever platform you listen! 

Episode Links:

Audree’s “Forehead Crinkle” tag on Tumblr

“You rode a farty donkey” clip

Young Macgyver

Jared’s head tilt    

Like/Rate/Review & Subscribe to the show on: Apple Spotify Youtube Patreon And anywhere else you listen to podcasts! Email us at: samgirlretrospectivepod@gmail.com Follow us on IG for visuals and updates. Follow us on Tiktok for clips and memes.

Images from Fangasm and Sam Winchester Caps on Tumblr. 

Hosts: @sunflowerchester @peanutbutterandbananasandwichs @agelade

[silverspleen]

Chronicles of Riddick is two things

Completely committed to being as edgy and horny as conceivably possible in 2004. It unflinchingly makes such noble decisions as "calling the prison planet where daylight burns everything instantly to death 'Crematoria.'" It introduces space magic to a setting where previously there were only feral aliens and pretty well-grounded like "humans spread to the stars but have the same problems as we did on earth" vibes. A man pulls someone's soul out of their body. Air elemental Judi Dench can glide quite well, actually.

Absolutely beautiful because of this.

Like. I was talking to @quillusquillus about it and so much newer scifi is only beautiful in this very... Clean sort of arty-farty highbrow way, which is well and good, that's moving and beautiful, but I need more scifi that commits enthusiastically to being as deeply and unapologetically cringe as possible with literally no self awareness and therefore circles back around to being full of unbridled drive and creativity. You could not tell Chronicles of Riddick it was cringe in 2004 because it genuinely honestly thought it was doing the coolest possible thing at the time and it was right.

Granted, the series is very 2000s deeply evil to women, every single woman (and lbr many of the men) who ever sees Riddick is instantly thirsty for his broody criminal ass but like... It also vibes with a particular brand of rampant dirty horniness unmatched in today's sterile media. I would probably also be horny for this man. The space goths are sadomasochists who sicko kiss open mouth with tongue while planning plot-relevant betrayal. Literally no character except Imam has any kind of grasp of what constitutes normal consent behavior because this is a world where apparently roughly 1/3 of the population is scuzzy mercenaries (1/3 is normie civillians, 1/3 is evil space empire drones, and 0.00000001% are super special protagonist humans from the super special space magic protagonist planets).

Riddick is so OP he can insta-murder 90% of the characters and knows it so all he does is make edgelord comments all day. And not in the new Marvel way where it's like "tee hee we're so funny" this shit is 100% earnest. "Who's the better killer." "It's an animal thing." You know men were in the writers room completely in love with him as a character 100% convinced he was the best thing since sliced bread original character Do Not Steal. He has special pink nightvision and comes from a planet of badasses so badass there's a magical prophecy about how cool they are and every time characters try and get him to do the right thing he refuses! And not in a cool protagonist way! In a shitty asshole way!

It was also during that age where CGI was good enough to make scenes fun but still cringe but everything is mostly practical, so it's gloriously tactile. All the spaceships have bigass chunky clunky buttons. One of the main villains is wearing replica historical knight armor. Islam still exists and canonically New Mecca is a real place and theoretically people live completely normal lives while all this bugfuck nuts space drama is happening around them.

It is simply. So good.

The only bad thing is that the fight scenes are really very badly cut and that is my only critique. Masterpiece.

[juicyolpickle]

FLOWER PLANET PROJECT

I thought I’d post this older project of mine that I did throughout my college course that started it all. For my FMP (final major project) I decided my theme will be speculative biology but at the time I titled it speculative evolution as I did not know the name of the genera. I would say this was the project that pushed me towards the direction that I am in now and that is to fully explore spec bio in my art.

I wanted to create animals that resembled plants due to their planet being rich with oxygen and inhabited by giant alien flowers, thus pushing the animals into adapting colourful camouflage to blend in with their also vibrant environment, resembling many of the planets fauna. At the time I was taking inspiration from earths animals such as camels, tarantulas, amphibians, and gazelles. I used this as a starting point as I didn’t want to go all out in creating a hard core alien life form with science farty stuff behind every design decision.

Here’s a pig thingy ma jig that I’ve created as a visual starting point to what I wanted my spec bio creatures to resemble or take example from, on this flowering planet. ⬇️

CONCEPT SKETCHES

And here are some of the sketches that I’ve already posted on this account but I’m going to include them here seeing how these where essentially the “concept art” to the project.

I made people vote on which two creatures from the carnivore and herbivore sheets they wanted me to create into information sheets and these where few of the options that where shown.

Herbivore sketch sheet ⬇️

Carnivore sketch sheet ⬇️

SPEC BIO INFO SHEETS

The animals that have been voted the most where made into information sheets which is shown here.

KNETI CONCEPT SHEET (gazelle)

ASAGA CONCEPT SHEET (camel)

POSOFF CONCEPT SHEET (amphibian)

EUROSA CONCEPT SHEET (tarantula)

I hope to remake this project and switch the organisms from organic life forms to plant based organisms that have evolved to preform high functioning actions.

ECOSYSTEM

I’ve also made a badly photoshopped landscape and a illustration showing off part of the planet’s ecosystem both being based on dry hot areas

THE END‼️‼️‼️

[aerbiscuit]

I’m gonna elaborate on a fart-related thought I’ve been contemplating recently. I didn’t share it before because it’s one of those story ideas that are less about sexy fart fixation and more about story/world implications. Also, the subject matter can be a bit sensitive considering the parallels to legitimate health conditions. Still, I wanna get these thoughts down, so I might as well see what people think about them.

What would happen if there was a virus/illness that, after infection and recovery, made people gassier?

This may seem like a silly idea, but as most people are likely already aware, its inspiration is real. Many viruses/infections/illnesses can affect people long after they are actively “sick,” sometimes temporarily and sometimes permanently. COVID-19 has left many people with long COVID symptoms, polio causes paralysis, measles resets the immune system, and yes, some stomach viruses can leave people with IBS and food sensitivities. Gut bacteria can change after an illness, which means an illness can change how the gut functions and what it can digest.

For the sake of this thought experiment, let’s set some ground rules about this entirely fictional illness.

1) It’s not a direct mutation/version of a specific existing illness; essentially, it’s a gastrointestinal virus that’s so unique that we can classify it as “its own thing.” It is very contagious, but similar to most stomach bugs, it is only caught through contact with fecal particles and/or contaminated surfaces, so it can be contained. While it is very contagious during the actual “sick” period, it is much less so after recovery, but more on that later.

Also, for this story, this virus is relatively “new.” One of the reasons that it spreads as much as it does, and there’s as much scrambling to deal with it as there is, is because there really hasn't been anything like it before. This world is still trying to learn what to do about it.

2) The symptoms of the actual “sick” period vary, but they’re not severe. There will be a low fever and a period of intestinal distress, such as cramps and possible diarrhea. It’s not pleasant, but (and this is important), it’s usually not as bad as the really nasty stomach bugs, like norovirus. It’s inconvenient, but may be mistaken for a cold combined with eating something that didn’t sit well with you. This leads into...

3) It is not fatal. No matter your age, sex, state of your immune system, etc., this will likely NOT kill you. The most dangerous this can get is maybe the initial fever (although it’s low) and providing a dehydration risk due to getting the runs during the actual sick period, but even then, it’s not severe enough to be an actual threat.

4) The identifying side effect of catching this illness is that an absurdly high number of people who recover from it get really gassy. It could be classified as a form of IBS, but honestly, it’s more like anything and everything can make them fart. Their gut bacteria gets razed during the “growing pains” of the initial illness, and in their place is a legion of new bacteria that ferments basically anything into farts. Normal food will make them fart, and typically farty food will make them REALLY fart.

5) For most people, these side effects are inconvenient, annoying, and even embarrassing… but not debilitating. Bloating pains can be a bitch, but they can be managed with regular release. In fact, for some people, it can be an improvement if their previous digestive system was somehow less desirable than one that makes you fart all the time. Certain food insensitivities are “reset” if they’re confined to the digestive tract, so if a certain food made you shit your brains out pre-illness, it will only make you fart like a horse post-illness. However, almost anything will make you fart like a horse post-illness, so you win some, you lose some.

This last point is important, as it provides a source of conflict in how this world would handle the illness. Because on the one hand, it’s a contagious illness that almost certainly changes people’s digestive tracts for at least a few years (possibly forever; it remains to be seen). That feels like a significant threat.

But… is it? The illness is avoidable with proper hand-washing and sanitation techniques, so it’s not like it will shut the world down. Also, its mortality rate is practically nil, so there isn’t that fear behind it. As for the farting… well, people have differing opinions on how much of a tragedy it is to get those side effects.

And that leads into the big question: Would people try to catch this illness intentionally?

Statistically speaking, at least some people would try. I’ve been on the Internet long enough to know that some people would jump at the chance to be eternally farty. But there are so many implications that would follow. Would these people start searching for those who are actively sick and try to get infected? Would they seek out people who have recovered and are fart-altered, and have unprotected anal sex with them, hoping for the (very low, but not impossible) chance that the infection will spread to them? Would they just live in hope and anticipation, waiting for the news to announce that there’s a higher risk of encountering the illness in their area?

How would the world reorient itself after the advent of this illness? Would public spaces and events be redesigned as more of the population has to handle needing to fart half the time? Would people become more forgiving about farts, with farts slipping out in public becoming as common as sneezing or coughing, or would chronic farters be judged as those who succumbed to the illness? Would people feel pressured to claim, truthfully or not, that their gas wasn’t due to the illness?

And the thing that some people fear the most: after so many infections and bodies to dwell in, will this virus ever grow into something worse?

… welp, now these thoughts are the Internet’s problem! Hopefully some of you find them interesting.

[philosophicaldream]

During the Golden Age of Pirates, Antonio Fernandez Carriedo was a terror of the seas. El Diablo, some called him. El Terror, others cried out, when he captured an enemy ship. El Pirata Carriedo, El Pirata Loco de Ojos Verdes.

Loco de avaricia, loco de vicio, loco de poder.

He was drunk on the rush it gave him, to plunder and conquer all in the name of the Spanish crown.

Now he was drunk on a different kind of power, and certainly his favorite vice. For the Mad Pirate Antonio had just stumbled upon a Royal Neapolitan xebec. Its crew had pleaded for mercy, offered up their finest goods, their silks and gold coins from far-flung lands. But that didn’t interest the man who had everything. No, what interested him was the sharp-tongued beauty who attempted to fight him - him, a Master Swordsman and Lord of the Seas - with nothing more than a rapier. The fight, childsplay that it was, had ended as expected, and though the loser had spat on his face and called him a monster, it had made the pirate laugh. A spitfire beauty he was, indeed, with unblemished olive skin, plump kissable lips, a slender frame, and wide angelic hazel eyes.

That was what he would call a true treasure.

And so Antonio claimed the Prince of Naples, Lovino Vargas, for his own personal collection, and for his own pleasure, slinging him over his shoulder despite his protests, fists beating harshly against his back. He carried him back to his own ship (not without burning down the xebec first), made his way down to his cabin, with his crew knowing to look the other way, and threw him on his bed.

He examined his prey - whose wrists were now bound to the bed posts in artfully tight knots so as not to escape - all while the Prince hurled insults at him.

“Bastardo! Vai a cacare!” He spat out when Antonio’s hands brushed against the center of his chest, picking at the gold trimmings that made up the fastenings of his green coat. “What do you think you’re doing, pirata sporco?”

Antonio ignored him, and focused instead on the other parts of the outfit - the waistcoat, the sleeves, the collar - all of which were lined with gold. It complimented the Prince’s body nicely, hugged him in all the right places.

“It’s clearly more than you can afford,” Lovino taunted from above.

He looked up, and saw no fear in his lover’s eyes. Only striking defiance. He played the part of a smug, arrogant royal well. It made him almost want to submit to Lovino on the spot and kiss him senseless. Almost.

He was so confident, so complete in his trust of Antonio, how could he not give his husband what he wanted for his birthday?

“Is that so?” Antonio returned, casually, bringing out one of his knives that he stowed discreetly on his person. Gently, he cupped Lovino’s chin in one hand, and held the knife in the other, close to his collar, in an attempt to intimidate.

Still, Lovino did not falter. “Vai a farti fottere!” He spat out.

El Diablo, as a true rey pirata of the seas, had dabbled in the languages of other nations. He was a master of tells, and could call out even the most serious of men on their bluffs. The Prince could curse all he wanted. But underneath all those angry words and furious eyes, behind all that postering, was a growing fire of lust.

“Go fuck myself?” Antonio laughed. “Mi principito, you are mistaken. The only one I will be fucking is you tonight.” At that, he brought the knife down, slicing through his lavish garments, leaving his chest exposed to the cool salty air that filled the room.

If Antonio thought he looked beautiful before, he looked utterly exquisite with his clothes sliced through. Ravishing… a siren ready to be ravished.

But Antonio pushed the thoughts aside, and got to his feet. He ignored Lovino’s protests - “That jacket was worth more than your boat, jerk!” He ignored that growing warmth between his legs - it had to simply wait for the actual show to start before getting into any real action.

For now, he needed rope.

—-

Spain and Romano are back to role playing their kinks again. My next Spamano focus.

[cricketcat9]

What did I just see when scrolling? An ad sponsored by Health Notes. TOXIC LIVER! Most people don't notice! 5 signs! A drawing of a dude's back with a red rash!

BEWARE OF FARTY LIVER!

I thought my old eyes deceived me. No, it clearly says FARTY LIVER, and invites you to click to learn more about your FARTY LIVER. Damn, a new terrible LIVER condition descended upon humanity. We really can't catch a break 😭

[tmbgaresuck]

why marty beller (more like. farty pooper) specifically? dan, danny, john, and john also have houses!

i feel like I don't give Marty Beller enough hateful attention. He is sitting at the table wondering "where is my hate" and that's kind of pathetic. He also may be the worse one since he kills people for fun. The two Dans wouldn't be fun to crash the horse into either because they get the least attention so they probably live in a house made purely out of wet cardboard. And I'm pretty sure the Johns live in a tour bus most of the time so that could cause the horse to die if it tried to bust through titanium walls (They have to make it that thick otherwise They'd get attacked)

and if you'd like a better insult than "farty pooper" (no offense) you could call him Marty Smeller. I never even thought of calling him Farty though so I think you are pretty intelligent anon.

[lunamagicablu]

Non sono le situazioni a farti infelice. Possono procurarti dolore fisico, ma non ti fanno infelice, i tuoi pensieri ti fanno infelice. Le tue interpretazioni, le storie che racconti a te stesso, ti fanno infelice. Eckhart Tolle art by Kawan ***************** It's not the situations that make you unhappy. They may cause you physical pain, but they don't make you unhappy, your thoughts make you unhappy. Your interpretations, the stories you tell yourself, make you unhappy. Eckhart Tolle art by Kawan 

[lotusfartstwice]

Tagged by @tazova

don't have to do it ofc but tagging: @alumort @zen-please @nomisupernova @spellcasterlight @depressedhatakekakashi and anyone who would like to do it!

questions under cut --->

Last book:

Last TV show:

Last thing I Googled:

Fav color:

Sweet/savory/Spicy:

Relationship status:

Looking forward to:

Current obsession:

[lotusfartstwice]

I feel insane how intensely I love them.

What’s your favorite rare pair or crack ship?

[smirk-mode]

Some Red Dwarf Uniform Headcanons

Series 1 is the bonafide Space Corps uniform, at least for people working in commercial branches like JMC

Series 7 Flashbacks to that hideous blue uniform are specific to Kochanski's dimension

Series 8 is what the nanobots thought would be an improvement on this design - because they also recreated the crew, the crew didn't notice any difference

As for Rimmer and Lister's 'uniform' choices

Series 1 and 2 - They're both still lost and trying to figure out how to actually cope with their situation, so Rimmer holds fast to his pre-death routines, which includes a smart uniform. Lister just stops caring, but continues wearing hawaiian shirts and London Jets shirts like he did before as a way to buck authority. These also represent him trying to keep a link to his homeland (England) and his dream of retiring in a tropical paradise (Fiji)

Rimmer in Series 3 onwards - There have always been specific uniforms for Hologrammatic crewmen to wear, however most ships don't enforce this as having an H glued to your forehead is bad enough without further 'othering' the dead. Rimmer only stops wearing his original uniform when he finally accepts his new status, with Green meaning he's a hologram purely generated by Holly, Red meaning he's operating via Light Bee (likely something the crew scavenge at some point), and Blue as we know meaning Hard Light. He sticks with the blue from thereon in (apart from his Ace Rimmer stint) as he's fairly comfortable with the uniform.

Lister in Series 3 onwards - After reasonably adjusting to his lot in life as much as he can, and accepting he'll never see England again, or see Fiji at all, he discards the last of his uniform to try and be himself and tries to return to being the wannabe arty-farty type he always wanted to be (see 17 year old Sham Glam Lister for reference), resulting in his Space Biker look. But when he actually truly adjusts to their situation he ditches the biker jacket in favour of the Ripley-esque Space Trucker boiler suit, cos it's easier for him to do repairs while wearing it compared to a heavy jacket. But after losing Krissie he returns to his Space Biker outfits, having kind of given up on improving his lot. By the later series he's wearing the biker jackets and hawaiian shirts to try and recapture his youth.

As for the cat? He makes what he can with the materials he has at his disposal and deems whatever he makes at that time to be what's in fashion.... And Kryten? Well they just kind of cannibalise body covers off the dead series 4000 mechanoids they come across (a bit morbid but probably necessary), with Lister making custom parts if needed...

[omtai]

First artie pic in a while…enjoy❤️

ARTIE FARTIE IVE BEEN MISSING HIM DEARLY 💗💗💗 i saw a similar cat to him on the dash and i nearly scrolled by then i stopped and thought WAIT… WAS THAT ARTIE FARTIE but upon scrolling back up i realised it was some other imposter cat . ☹️ i missed his awesome face … does he know how awesome he is

[rereadanon]

Weekly Tag Wednesday Thursday 🫠

Thank you for the tag @deedala, @suzy-queued, @thepupperino, @gardenerian, @metalheadmickey, @gallawitchxx ! I am really trying to be more social so here it goes..

name: Anna

age: 39 😬

astrological sign: ♐️

upon which continent do you reside: North America

tell us how you're feeling right now using 3-5 emojis: 👩🏼‍🌾😬🥐😴☕️

whats your favorite flavor of gum? Trident Tropical Twist but I found out chewing gum makes me extra farty so I don't really do it anymore

whats the last movie you watched? The Idea of You 🥵🥵

what was your worst subject in high school? All of them but math can especially suck it

whats the job you stayed at for the shortest period of time? My first job was at a bagel shop where I promptly got fired for mixing up orders and giving my friend free food

whats your favorite thing to do at an amusement park? I am not really big on rides but amusement park food can GET IT

what condiments go on top of the perfect hot dog (meat or plant-based)? I am a purist (ketchup, mustard, relish) but I will say I have not really had the opportunity to try other versions so I am open!

cincinnati chili, thoughts? I can't say I have had it but it sounds awesome

do you sleep with a plushie? Just a dog and a man

how do you feel about thunderstorms? I am very into them as long as there is no tornado threat. A good afternoon storm is such a reset!

what's the last animal you touched? The neediest dog on the planet (I love him)

grab the nearest item with words on it that ISNT a book and tell me the final word: Notification (my phone)

have you ever forgotten to do an assignment until the night before its due? Honey, I will purposely forget and then be paralyzed with panic and then churn it out ridiculously fast and then LEARN NOTHING from the experience and do it again next time

No tags because I’m late but if you are so inclined, go for it. I promise to do better next time (see the last ?)

[willnill]

i thought come '24 this blog will be more focused on my own arty-farty.

as of now it seems i lose followers every time i post my own art, so perhaps this is a heads-up