ive been a little upset about it all night so i need to write out all the things that happened at work today and are bugging me so i can TRY to get it out of my head and actually RELAX bc i just keep pacing in circles around it instead of just accepting it and moving on
I meant to go admire a frozen waterfall yesterday, but I'm scared of driving on slippery roads so I ended up abandoning my car and my dreams and just wandering about by foot, following random roads.
(These first two photos are a little bit blurry because I took them while walking, but it does give them a certain je ne sais quoi... They look like childhood memories)
The soles of my boots had zero grip and were therefore great for sliding, so I ended up taking two sticks and using them like cross-country skiing poles to propel myself forward on the iciest portions of the road. It was fun! Pandolf thought I was insane. He was being extremely prudent on the icy patches, testing each step:
At the beginning of our walk he was prancing as usual but then at one point his front paws slipped forward without warning, turning him into a very long slinky dog. It was pretty funny. I laughed. I admit. He wasn't hurt but definitely a bit vexed.
We did leave the icy road on numerous occasions, to slip under fences and cross promising pastures (promising = lots of footprints; potential friends.) We met several creatures! Like this adorable shetland pony—I tried to take a photo from afar, with Pandolf nearby for scale, to show how scandalously tiny he was, but that turned out to be impossible because he was too friendly. Every time I took a step back he took two steps forward. Clearly he thought he was even better-looking from up close.
We also ran into the darling goat I mentioned yesterday, and I was told by several people on here that she looked more like a ewe.
Sorry for the mistake! But also I tried to look further into this and became more and more confused, as every source that mentioned a foolproof way to tell goats from sheep was disproven by another source—I found one that said sheep had a split upper lip while goats didn't (and my mystery friend didn't), but then another website contradicted it. I ended up with 32 tabs open with photos of goats and sheep of all kinds, some of which looked downright bizarre (what's with the Jar Jar Binks ears), and I began losing my grasp on the concept of animal species altogether. I understood how Darwin must have felt when he tried to figure out the differences between species of barnacles and asked people to send him various specimens and ended up with giant teetering piles of wet smelly boxes full of barnacles in his study that threatened to collapse and bury him alive. Then I closed my 32 tabs.
Honestly ever since learning that some sheep have horns and some goats don't, I've been lost. Not to mention, our mystery girl had a sheep-like tail but a goat-like beard. Are there sheep out there with beards and if yes, how do we make sense of the world? We should be able to point at a mammal with a goatee and say "goat" without doubting ourselves. That's my manifesto.
Whatever she was, the goat-ewe was very sweet, and she baa-ed a lot—at first I thought she was making conversation and I politely baa-ed back, before realising she was calling her horse bodyguards, just in case. Two horses soon showed up from behind a tree, very "What seems to be the problem ma'am?"
I offered nose scritches to the friendliest of the two and she went to report to the goat like "We've neutralised the threat."
Let me insert another (blurry) photo of a travelling Pandolf to symbolise the passing of time before moving on to our last encounter:
... I also had trouble taking photos of this one at first, because she kept coming closer to inspect my scarf—I thought she wanted to explore my pockets for potential treats like Pirlouit often does but no, she was very interested in the smell (texture?) of my scarf specifically.
The sky had cleared as we went down from 1300 to 1100m, as if we'd slipped under the clouds, so I tried to take a photo of this nice late-afternoon sky, and the horse finally stopped focusing on my scarf and instead started insistently positioning herself between me and my beautiful landscape.
Look at this lovely golden light in the snow over there which I was almost able to capture!
Meanwhile her pasture mate was eating a whole broom plant, slowly and thoughtfully, which makes me jealous because my llamas are supposed to eat brooms and they mostly don't, they think they're too good for brooms. They eat the very young ones but not adult brooms, so I have to do the work of three llamas and cut them myself. I wish I could send the Pampses as interns in this pasture, to learn the art of brush-clearing from this wise old horse.
I tried to take one last landscape photo and gave up when the aspiring model came to pose again.
Where was Pandolf, you might ask? Pandolf doesn't trust horses, especially large farm horses, and was quietly and insistently trying to convince me to leave. When Model Horse tried to greet him (it looks like she's chasing him but no, she was just stretching her neck to sniff him) he beat a hasty retreat toward the icy road, his former enemy. Some guard dog.
It may sound like Pandolf didn't have a very fun time on this walk, slipping on ice and running from horses, but don't worry, he found plenty of suitable empty pastures to practise his favourite hobby! Though I think at this point he has moved beyond a hobbyist and is ready to play in professional leagues. He does this thing now where he jumps up a bit to gain momentum; I don't remember him doing this last winter. He's an entirely self-taught dog (in the art of snow diving) and I'm proud of him.
A series of knocking woke you up from your accidental nap. Blinking wearily, you tried to figure out what had woken you up.
The knocking started again, and you let your head lull to that direction. “Okay, okay. I’m coming, I’m coming,” you grumbled, as you slowly got off the couch.
You pulled the blanket from the couch and wrapped it around your shoulders as you made your way to the door. Unlocking it, you pulled the door open and blinked at a very well dressed Jason.
“Was there a date we agreed to that I somehow forgot about?” you asked and moved out of the way when Jason let himself in.
“What? No, why would you say that?” he asked, pacing around the living. You closed the door and turned around, meekly gesturing to his outfit.
“You’re in a tux.”
“Huh?” he said and looked down. “Oh. Yeah no, this is for something else.”
“Okay…? Can I help you with something then?”
“So there’s this gala tonight,” Jason said, going back to pacing, “and it’s the first one I’m attending. And Bruce has the idea of making a statement that I wasn’t actually dead.”
“So it’s the dead coming back to life thing,” you mused, “does Bruce have a story?”
“Yup. He has everything planned but I-”
“You’re not ready to be integrated back into society,” you finished and he merely nodded.
“What me to come with? Act as your buffer?” That had stopped Jason’s pacing and he turned towards you in surprise.
“You’d do that?” he asked, you shrugged. “You’ll be in front of cameras. You’ll meet my family for the first time.”
“I know,” you said, hiding how nervous you were at the thought of meeting them for the time. “But you need help, and maybe someone in your corner.”
“But you don’t know the full story.”
“I don’t need it to help you.”
“I could kiss you.”
“I’ll count this as date two,” you said, smiling when he snorted. “What time do you need to be there?”
Jason looked at his watch before answering. “Twenty minutes.”
qétoiles n qbagz’ convo about his code arm + fun banter from last sunday :] english subs + transcript below da cut
[Video transcript:
Etoiles: But yesterday when he [Forever] talked to me, he was so frightened, basically he was like, ‘But one day won’t you lose your shit and want to kill the Eggs with the Code, and everything?’ Though I was telling him, ‘But the fact is, I know the Code very well’—
Baghera: Oh, so you told him you joined—?
Etoiles: No, no, no, not at all. It’s just that he has these assumptions that I’m really allied to the Code because—
Baghera: I think it’s due to your Code tattoo, also, it gives off the impression you’re in the process of transforming into a Code, Etoiles, let’s not lie.
Etoiles: That’s it, that’s it. But, basically I told him that I’ve had it since—
Baghera: But you don’t give a shit? You’re taking it well?
Etoiles: Well, yeah, I don’t give a shit because I know he’ll never beat me. Basically I—
Baghera: But you don’t give a shit about the code literally popping up over your body?
Etoiles: Well, yeah, because it’s a part of me now. It’s normal.
Baghera: How?
Etoiles: Well, after— after fighting someone 17 times, you start— you start creating links. But those links—
Baghera: But— you know that’s not how things work. Like— look, we cross paths. Right now we’re crossing paths. You see? We’re crossing paths. I kick your ass. Like, for free. You see? I see you, I’m like, ‘Bro, I don’t like his face,’ so I kick your ass.
Etoiles: But no! Because if you tell me ‘Good fight’ at the end—
Baghera: I see you again— wait, I’m not finished. I see you again like 12 times, and I tell myself, ‘Hey, I’ll do it again,’ I kick your ass again. After a while, Rayou, I won’t get diabetes!
Etoiles: Well, maybe you will, huh.
Baghera: Yes, but it’s not— it doesn’t work, like— there’s no correlation, you see!
Etoiles: You know you won’t have those cells anymore, you know, it’s possible.
Baghera: But— no— what I mean is— Etoiles! That’s now how it works! It’s worrisome! It’s normal for us to worry!
Etoiles: Well, yeah, but, uhhh. Basically, you’re all used to talking with me on the island. And you understand very well that there’s nothing able to corrupt me.
Baghera: That we don’t know, Etoiles! Because— if it’s— I know that your morality, and your enormous brain, and your big body, won’t get corrupted. But if there’s suddenly— well, what I mean is that we don’t know what all the possible systems of manipulation on the island are.
Etoiles: It’s true. No, it’s true. But for the moment I’m doing well.
Baghera: Yeah, well, so much the better. But—
Etoiles: For the moment I’m doing well!
Baghera: If you feel any change, Etoiles, mention it, okay?
Etoiles: Oh, I’ll talk about it. But for the time being I’m doing very well.
Baghera: So I can understand peoples’ fear upon seeing you LITERALLY transform into a Code and who tell themselves, ‘Oh, strange, maybe there’s a thing with the Codes.’
Etoiles: It’s true but who can better know the dangers of the Code than someone who’s confronted it his whole life? Instead of someone who—
Baghera: I’m well aware.
Etoiles: No but it’s— it’s— it’s for that reason that I told Forever. I totally understand the fear and everything, it’s normal. You see a dude turning into a Code, you ask yourself, ‘What’s the guy who sent him doing?’
Baghera: Well, yeah, there you go.
Etoiles: Like, ‘Who sent him?’
Baghera: But you don’t feel any different? Nothing?
Etoiles: Absolutely not, no. Everything is going well. I still hate the Code whenever I see him, I still want to kick his ass. Everything’s fine. Even if right now I want him—
Baghera: But you join up with them when he suggests it, yeah. Well, it’s to get the shield back.
Etoiles: It was just for the shield, believe me. Believe me, if I run into them again- if I run into them again and they don’t offer me things to save the Eggs and everything, it’s goodbye. And considering what I’ve prepared— considering what I’ve prepared, I objectively think that 5 Codes won’t be enough to kill me. There’ll need to be 10 of them.
Baghera: They might bring 10, huh.
Etoiles: Yeah, well, then again, we have time.
Baghera: Well, in any case, they don’t want to kill you anymore since you’re working with them.
Etoiles: Well, in fact, we’re not really— actually— I don’t really know what he’s thinking. Because the last time we talked I told them, ‘But if you lay even a finger on the Eggs, I’ll kick your fucking asses, you sacks of shit.’ And they left, and they didn’t answer me.
Baghera: Then again, they’re a bit cryptic, the Codes, you know.
Etoiles: Yeah, but normally they— I managed to talk with them a bit, so— so I don’t know. Personally, I’m telling you—
Baghera: Okay, no, what I mean is that I understand why when people see you they think, ‘Maybe it’s possible he’s getting a little bit corrupted by the Codes.’
Etoiles: No but yeah, yeah, I totally get it. But honestly, never. Never in a million years.
Baghera: I believe you! I trust you. But if there’s— if once you feel any difference or something of the sort, you mention it, okay? To whomever you want, but you mention it.
Etoiles: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (10000x)
Baghera: You know you’re not very reassuring when you say that, as an answer.
Etoiles: That’s true. But I’m telling you there’s no problem. And— actually. The moment I start feeling strange, I’ll put numbers. And so you’ll have to come get me.
Baghera: Okay, okay. I’ll remember that.
Etoiles: Just that. But I— I— yeah. I whisper in the Code’s ear.
Baghera: The day you start talking to me in binary, there’ll be an issue, basically.
Etoiles: The day I say, ‘10001’, that’s it. But actually, I’m telling you, I could never be corrupted because I have AVAST, my wool block which blocks viruses.
Cap despises the fact that even when theyre finally happy, shimmering again like they did in their youth... their mistakes and limitations continue to haunt them.
These are days where they dont even want to see their tentacles.
You're probably gonna hear Leander singing by himself when you happen into the crypts and find his fucked up side hustle....
Mhin probably is more comfortable with Kuras because they are self isolating themselves due to their monster from possibly taking out those they loved before, and Kuras (other than being kind to them) doesn't ask follow up questions and is more of an observer so there's a natural boundary that they don't have to stress over. They probably dropped Leander even though they liked him because he crossed that boundary....
Vere probably knows what's wrong with the world and is going to tell MC if they help break him out, but Kuras is probably going to stop this from happening in an attempt to chase after/"save" MC and because he's the one who maybe sorta kinda put Vere in the hands of the Senobium in the first place.
Kuras is going to have to watch his fall over and over again as punishment, and this time it's Leander. He's going to have to watch Leander's downfall unable to stop it and knowing he's possibly the cause of his darker ambitions... Kuras has already failed redemption this go around, and Eridia is probably going to fall.