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bubblyani · 4 years

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Deeper Relations : 03

(Freddie Jackson x Reader)

A Freddie Jackson Multi Chapter Series

Chapter 03: The Confession

Summary: Being the youngest sister of Jackie and Maggie, you were quite young when Freddie Jackson went to prison. Upon his return, you cannot help but recall your innocent love you had for him back then. And surprised by your transformation into womanhood, Freddie cannot help but form a desire towards you. Will a dangerously seductive attraction grow between the two of you? What will be the consequences?

Requested by: @97freaknik Thank you for your detailed request 😘

Author’s Note: Managed to write faster with the self isolation period lol. Trying to be productive and creative. Hope y’all enjoy this!

Chapter 1, Chapter 2

“Alright, girls! Lights off!…Goodnight!” “Goodnight Aunt Y/N!”

Scrunching your nose playfully, you smiled at your beautiful nieces before turning off the lights. As you closed the door, you hoped they would drift off to dreamland with much haste.

Making your way to the living room, you sensed the emptiness. Upon realization, you hurriedly rushed to Jackie’s room. You sighed. Not the fact that she was curled up in bed, but the fact you could spot the bottle of pills sitting comfortable on her bedside cupboard. Clicking your tongue, you felt guilt.

Guess Maggie was right about this.  

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(A few days ago)

“You’ve ever done shotgun kisses? “Ohhh yeah” “Guess I should try it out myself sometime……maybe with a friend. Hah! Maybe even with Marcus-” “Why don’t we try it?”

“Why don’t we try it?”

Those words, Freddie’s words, they succeeded in leaving you questioning even a week later. If the one had laughed right after a line like that, the humor would have shown. But the way his eyes glinted with seriousness, it frightened you. What did he mean by that exactly?

That was not the only surprise you came across, for surprises came in the form of three.

Surprise number two: Freddie’s string of dalliances with other women.

You never mean to eavesdrop, but when you accidentally found yourself do so during Jimmy and Maggie’s conversation, you couldn’t walk away from it. As much as you expected this from a gangster, the thought of Freddie actually doing so made your heart shatter a little. Regardless, he was someone you admired apart from romanticizing in your young age. And what he and Jackie had back then, it was something you longed for.

If the dalliances were true, perhaps he was actually pulling your leg that day. Just messing with you. Perhaps none of what he said was to be taken so seriously.

To your relief, Maggie confided it all in you soon after, leaving you less guilty about eavesdropping. And as you were told, what made it sadder was that Jackie knew of them. She knew of his ways, she knew of the women, which enraged you. Unfair it was clearly. Why couldn’t anything be done about it? You wondered. Which led to the third surprise: Jackie’s Addiction.

As much as she was skilled in putting on a good face to all, Jackie struggled with all the challenges her family had to go through. Having someone like Freddie as her husband definitely had not been easy. Which easily drove her into the arms and comfort of non prescribed medication.

“We have to keep an eye out for her, Y/N….” Maggie said, as you both sat in her room “She is our sister” “Yeah, of course” you nodded frantically, “Anything really…”

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(Present)

When you heard your sister Jackie had suddenly come down with a bad stomach, you were more than willing to step up and do your part.

And there you were, proactive, helping out with the cleaning and cooking. Though your sister grew with it, you did not complain. Instead you wore a smile always. You even tended to your adoring nieces, making sure they were well-fed and went to bed on time. You did it all.

Running your fingers through Jackie’s soft blonde hair, you sat on the bed while she slept soundly. “You have to be strong, sis…” you whispered, “For the girls…for Freddie”

With drowsiness finally catching up, you decided to get some shut-eye.

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(Few hours later)

Nightmares, only they would usually wake you up in the middle of the night. But tonight, reason for your abrupt awareness, the profuse sweating in many a region was definitely not because of one. In fact, it was far from it.

Hopping into the shower, you closed the door but left it unlocked, considerate for the welfare of your sister, who developed the habit to run in to either relieve herself from whichever end of her body allowed. With the shower curtain closed, you let the pressurized cold water from the shower head cleanse you, while you hoped to cleanse the thoughts that lingered.

An intimate dream was always welcomed by you. But one with Freddie Jackson? Why now? In fact, Why ever?

Your mind soiled with guilt, you remembered it all with detail. The way his beautiful eyes undressed you. The way his wonderful hands roamed over you. The way his luscious lips tasted yours and much else.You tightened your temples, hoping to erase them away. This was all just too disturbing. It was wrong, you thought. Yet, the feeling you felt during was simply-No! You shook your head. It was wrong to even reconsider. It was simply wrong.

With your body and mind cleaned and cooled down, you mindlessly reached out to grab the towel. “Fuck!” You muttered. As distracted as you were, you forgot how the large towel was already used. And the only towel left in the shower was rather a small one. So small, it could barely cover your entire body. Cursing under your breath even further, you wrapped it around your frame so that you could at least hide your shame by concealing your nipples and the nether region while the mass of your cleavage and rounded curves of your buttocks had its time under the florescent light. Sighing, you were at least relieved it was late, and that no one would witness your shame.

The door burst open wide, leaving you gasping as the person you least expected entered.

Noticeably drunk, Freddie Jackson stumbled into the bathroom whilst halfway unbuckling his pants, suddenly stopping in alarm upon seeing you.

“Shit! Cupcake…” He chuckled with amusement. Although, his smile slowly faded the moment his eyes properly encountered your half naked figure standing in the bathtub, “Oh…” he exclaimed softly, with a voice low and animalistic. You felt yourself blush. “The fuck Freddie!….” You hissed, squinting instantly the moment you caught a glimpse of his exposed manhood. “Freddie!” Jackie’s sleepy voice echoed from the bedroom, surprising both of you. “Babe! You back?”Her voice inquired further. Closing the shower curtain behind you, you stood still. Freddie, standing in front of the commode, cleared his throat. “Yeah! Yeah babe…just in the loo” Freddie responded, quickly locking the door behind him to your frustration. Uncomfortable, you held your breath as you were forced to listen to him piss.

If this had happened to you years ago, it would’ve gone down a quite differently. It would have been humorous and embarrassing, which would have ended with you storming off the loo before he even considered pissing. It would have turned in to an interesting anecdote, which would have been shared with the entire family. But tonight you were speechless. Tonight, it seemed wrong. And tonight, he didn’t let you off.

The pissing did not stop to your surprise. A long night of drinking, maybe?

As you waited behind the curtain, a curious part of you urged to do the unthinkable. Holding your breath, you maintained absolute silence, drawing the curtain slightly open to asses the situation. He was not, and his visible manhood was clear proof, causing you to close the curtain in an instant.

Yet the image of his exposed genital was imprinted in your brain clear enough, it would probably last your whole life. You tried so hard not to let your thoughts dwell on it’s shape, it’'s color, its length. For it was wrong to merely do so.

More gasps left your lips, the moment the curtain was drawn wide open. Holding on to the towel that could almost fall off you any moment, you breathed deeply as Freddie stared at you. “Liked what you saw, cupcake?” He asked, buckling up his pants during. Embarrassed, you averted your eyes from it. “No… cause there was nothing to see…” “Not for me…” he said, licking his lips, “I’m really liking the view from here…” His gaze was something you had never seen. It was predatory, it was lustful. It was new. Trying not to react to any of that, you exhaled deeply. “Where were you, Freddie?” You were stern with your question. “Ozzy….” He sniffed, wiping his nose with his index finger, “He had a job for me…” “Was it just Ozzy?” “Meh…hehehe” With a shrug, Freddie chuckled, for he could not lie. As long as you’ve known him, he had never lied to you, you realized. With your sister in mind, you have gathered enough courage for it was now or never. “Look…” you began, “We’re all so glad that you’re back. But you should know, your family needs you, Freddie…” you said. He stopped smiling. Yet you continued, “It must seem really easy to …” taking a deep breath, you continued, “…shag around…It’s fun I bet…it’s exciting. It’s tempting…” you said, mentally pushing away the image of intimacy with him, “I’m not gonna act like I am a fucking saint cause I’m not but…” readjusting your towel, you continued, “I care about my family. And I care about you too, Freddie” you said, “So get a grip, alright? I know you can do better than this” As stern as you were, you managed to maintain as sense of calmness with your entire delivery. It possibly could have been the most adult statement you have ever made. And to your surprise, he listened to you.

Nodding, Freddie remained speechless for a few seconds. Looking down, he merely scratched his head. “Right…” he began softly, “…Goodnight”

No name. No nickname. Just ‘Goodnight’. Turning around, he left the bathroom, leaving you alone once again.

Slowly stepping out of the bathtub, you sat on the edge. You wondered whether you have destroyed the good relationship you had with this man within a span of few minutes. Yet, in your gut you knew, you did the right thing.

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You left the next morning, and you left without a trace of guilt. Jackie had gotten better, and Freddie was home once again. And the fact he was there was enough of a reason for you to avoid any awkward encounter anyways.

A few days later, on a fine morning, you were getting ready to head out for lectures. With a piece of toast on your mouth, you walked past Maggie, only to pause on your tracks. You watched her talk on the phone with a huge smile on her face. And from the way she addressed, you could easily guess who it was.

“Was that Jackie?” You asked the moment she hung up. Maggie nodded. “Yeah…And Y/N…” she said, looking at you with the same smile, “She sounds great” “Yeah?” Smiling back, you were genuinely surprised. “I don’t know whats going on but…” Maggie began, “…apparently Freddie hasn’t been fooling around anymore. Even Jimmy was surprised. Looks like he’s been at home with the girls. This…this is a miracle, Y/N!” Maggie said, as her eyes shone brightly. “Yeah it is…finally” you said, as happiness brimmed within you.

Your conscience was cleared, the weight was lifted off your shoulders. Walking on the pavement, you felt the urge to skip with joy. You felt pride, putting yourself out there to speak up for something worthwhile. And saving a relationship you valued, you really did your part. It was going to be a good day, you knew it.

Until you suddenly felt your hand being violently tugged back. “Wha-?” Turning back with annoyance, your eyes widened with shock.

You felt powerless when Freddie Jackson pushed you against the nearest brick wall by the pub. He looked devastated. With a tired looking face, his alcohol breath landed hot on your face, leaving you startled and confused.

“Freddie?” You breathed, “It’s 9:30 in the morning, why are you drinking?s” Chuckling maniacally, Freddie looked straight at you. “Oh…wouldn’t you like to fucking know!” He drawled. “Wha-?” “Oh Come on! Do it I have to fucking spell it out for you?” “You might have to, cause I have no clue” Continuing with his chuckles, he leaned in closer to you. So close you could see yourself in his eyes. “You…” he stressed, as his smile disappeared completely, “You’ve always been so different. Different from Jackie and Maggie…” he said.

You gulped. Did you by chance defy him? Was he embarrassed because of what you said? Was he angered?

“And after 4 fucking years, you’ve grown up into someone…so…”

Unable to describe himself, he could only grunt with frustration. Concerned, you stepped away from the wall. “What are you trying to say, Freddie?” You gasped as you felt yourself being pushed back again. Pressing himself against you, he placed his lips next to your ear. “I fucking fancy you, Y/N…” Frozen, you simply couldn’t believe your ears. “Heheh..that’s right….” He chuckled as he continued to whisper, “…my cock…Oh! It gets fucking hard for you. I can’t…fucking…stop thinking about you, Y/N…” he said, brushing his nose against your temple. Chills literally traveled down your spine.

“So…what do have to say about that?”

He asked you, haunting your ears in a low voice. Still frozen with disbelief, you waited. Until a form of breath could even reach your lungs.There it was, your innocent childhood fantasy, come to life in the most, filthy and unethical manner.

“Freddie…I…” You began, impatiently waiting for the rest of the sentence to come out. For how would you answer him now?

______________________________________

Chapter 4 HERE

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cruezins · 5 years

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☣ ; ( KIM TAEHYUNG , 24 , HE/HIM ) coming up next on rebel radio is OPAUL by FREDDIE DREDD . this tune goes out to SIWON RYU . rumor has it they just rolled into town and are fightin’ for the GHOULS . they’re AFFABLE , INQUISITIVE but also AIMLESS , MERCURIAL so watch your backs out there . we wish them the best of luck here in our golded city of light . stay vigilant , stay dirty rock ‘n rollers and we’ll catch you for the next one .

𝐎𝐎𝐂 : hello ! i’m deni and i don’t know what editing is . i use she/her pronouns and live in the gmt+9 timezone . i’m terrible with ooc chats and half the time just want to vibe a connection or plot idea , so please don’t hesitate to throw a half-formed thought at me because i swear i’ll do the same . my discord is gay fairy#6371 . anyway , here is siwon , someone i’ve been work-shopping for a while ! looking forward to writing with you ♡

☣ ; 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐀𝐁𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐇 .

cw : drug mentions ; stop me if you’ve heard this one before------

his dad’s a junkie and he hasn’t seen his mom since some fatcats bought their restaurant for a steal a few years before , but that’s the way of life for a lot of people in the underground . young , bored , and desperate to hear and smell anything that wasn’t the rottenness of his own childhood home , siwon found himself on the streets more nights than not , spray paint in one hand , painting nights in greens and purples until reds and blues chased him away . makes his first steal before he can tie his shoes . creates alliances with the neighborhood kids , sneaks around to watch how the haves live with their pretty , pretty screens and their ugly , ugly words . school isn’t anything special , either , and while siwon can’t remember shit that he reads from a page he can work with his hands . fast and efficient , nimble fingers whether they’re flying across a keyboard or fucking around with some screws . you can make something of yourself , some of his teachers tell him while others can’t stop bitching about homework or tardiness or the way he falls asleep in the middle of class . but what’s siwon supposed to make ? he and his ragtag group of weirdos he calls friends . when he gets older and nights get hungrier , siwon learns to stop relying on the benevolence of neighbors and finds a job --- he’s fast , after all , with a sweet face and wide eyes , makes a helluva getaway after years and years of running .

thieving’s a natural grift . he’d been training for this his whole life . then he catches the eyes of a boss man who isn’t nearly as mad as he should be catching some kid with his wallet in his hands . courier comes next , ferrying messages from a bunch of suits all over the city . siwon never opened the packages , never second guesses the credits that start bloating his account . desperate , he does what he’s told and does it well ------ and that’s the real kicker , isn’t it ? that after a year and some-odd months of dedicated service they leave him high and dry with some bullshit he doesn’t have any involvement with . after years of running , boys in blue finally catch him and he’s left to take the fall of some dumb fuckery , man , and he’s pissed . steaming in jail , it’s a wonder some other gang didn’t get to him first . the longer he sat and talked with that ghoul member , the more he grew to despise the rich , the ones who left him to rot after all the shit he did for them . what was even the point anymore ? dog eat dog kind of bullshit , no sense of loyalty or shit anywhere . the law and all that money was out to get him from the beginning and siwon had enough of it . a few months locked up but he learned and leaned and learned , only able to get out on a technicality . the second he stepped back out into the sun , siwon followed the map given to him and signed up for the ghouls . city of light be damned . the only lights he wants to see are flames eating this hellhole alive .

☣ ; 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 .

➤ full name. ryu si-won ➤ date of birth. january 29th ➤ hometown. city of light ➤ gender. cis male ➤ affiliation. ghouls ➤ primary occupation. drug runner , pickpocket ➤ secondary occupation. network manager at an internet cafe

➤ sexual attraction. pansexual ➤ romantic attraction. panromantic ➤ character alignment. chaotic neutral ➤ personality type. enfp ➤ temperament. sanguine ➤ wants. power , family

stands around 5′11 . broad shoulders , slim hips . floppy , messy hair and sun browned skin . half legs . a few pieces of silver in his ears and a small hoop on his bottom lip . dresses somewhere between a washed up rockstar , your college weed dealer , and a miami vice reject . style’s a whim with a closet’s chaotic mix of anything he thrifts or patches together . most of the time he’s sporting cuffed jeans , vintage blouse , a denim jacket or tweed blazer and thick ass boots . keeps all that hair back with a bandanna or a headband , hair ties on his wrist . nothing in his closet’s technically new and he loves looking for a bargain steal —— or simply just a steal . likes colors just as much as he likes his neutrals . wears a black air filtration mask and fingerless gloves . considers his floral button-up shirts fancy material and his trousers cut off at the ankles . likes the smell of old leather and the breathing of fringe on a jacket , the weight of heavy rings on his fingers and sunglasses swooped low on his nose . wears a monocle because he can’t be fucked with reading glasses . his hair’s been every color of the rainbow and he’s always changing it up thanks to temporary dye .

☣ ; 𝐁𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐃 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐎 𝐎𝐍𝐄 .

hustles at arcade halls , scarfs down ramen and burritos like they’re gonna disappear , looks as comfortable in a dark , dirty alley as he does standing under all those lights in the neon district . pockets full of candy and a lollipop between his lips . likes cheap beer and cigarettes , fast talking and smooth smiles . gets up when the sun goes down . who knows if he ever gets a full night’s sleep , but you can find him taking a nap just about anywhere . seems to live for the dark hours and stays busy as a bee , at the internet cafe one moment and grabbing fried cheese sticks in the next before crossing the bridge to watch the street races and venturing to the tunnels for the fighting rings . complains about being broke but puts down bets faster than anyone . lives for the feeling of wind in his hair so the window of his top-floor one bedroom shit hole stays open all the time . feels the rain on his skin , plays with matches . learned how to assemble a gun in less than sixty seconds and stays packing nowadays though he can’t really shoot for shit . spray paints boobs on the sides of government buildings and dicks on malls . looks like an angel under all those holographic lights .

rides a motorbike and his skateboard . can do crazy math in his head and spot fake bills with incredible accuracy . can barely stand to sit still , always moving except when there’s a computer screen in front of him . gets addicted to things so easily it’s scary --- people , food , liquor , feelings . craves that intimacy , craves that closeness that’s always been denied to him . has a loud as fuck laugh and a love for sneaking into places where he doesn’t belong . catches extra cash on the side by fixing up broken-down machines and can figure his way around a motor with a bit of elbow grease . still sees his family . not as much as a good son would , but he sends cash when he can and looks after his younger sister , makes sure she stays well and clean . they don’t know half of what he’s gotten up to since he was let out of prison , but they might have some idea --- after all , who’d pay a crooked boy with a record as well as he seems to be ? when the sun starts to come up and he crashes into bed , siwon stares out the window and thinks about how in another world , or in another time he probably could’ve been something . could’ve made something great . but for now he’s just got a whole lot of anger , raw like a fresh wound he can’t stop picking at .

☣ ; 𝐈𝐒 𝐈𝐓 𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ?

➤ bonds. my loyalty to my friends is unwavering ; i owe everything to my mentor --- a horrible person who’s rotting in jail somewhere ; i fleeced the wrong person and must work to ensure this individual never crosses paths with me . ➤ flaws. once i pick a goal , i become obsessed with it to the detriment of everything else in my life ; when I see something valuable , i can't think about anything but how to steal it ; i have a weakness for the vices of the city .

he’s friendly , but he doesn’t make friends easily --- the ones that he has made , he’d do anything for . because that’s how he’s gotten this far , right ? all those people who looked after him when others tried to stomp him out . he’s still close with his teen friends who threw a few grifts with him , gaming buddies that he knows only through a screen . little escapes from all the other bullshit going on in the world . even though he isn’t a club guy , he runs into more than a few faces on his rounds . maybe they’re bad influences or sweethearts who help that touch starved affliction that comes from living in a city so wired . on the flip side , there’s some enemies --- competitors in the runner world , antagonists he meets at the races or rings for whatever reason ( insane bets make tempers run hot , who knows when they’ll flare for good and siwon’s learning the hard way how to keep his mouth shut ) . he’s fixed up a few cars or weapons for people recently because he misses working with his hands . y’know , making nice . then there’s people he’s caught in a crossfire with , where they’ve met something nasty one too many times before over turf , territory and clients . a newer face to the ghouls , he’s bugged someone into mentoring him , and gone on a few runs with someone he loves to call a coworker .

eager to prove himself as more than a green kid with a keyboard and an eye for detail , find him cutting deals and making trades in smokey barbecue houses , hole-in-the wall ramen shops or by taco tents . a full bellied class of clients are happy clients in his opinion , and siwon isn’t above not making deals with the other groups who’s names aren’t violent delights . speaking of which --- there are definitely some skeletons there he aims to confront , some old demons to fight from that class of people that fucked him over . there’s an ex lover in there somewhere , probably met in that pre-prison childhood phase when he mingled past class lines more ( ~1.5-2 years ago ) . someone he’s healthily fearful of for whatever reason , and maybe a vendetta against the family that scammed his parents out of their business and basically sent his life spiraling . there’s someone who isn’t what they seem --- he doesn’t know who they really are , and maybe they don’t know who he is , either . they’ll learn eventually . someone he’s protective over , someone who protects him in ways he doesn’t even know , and those he looks after because they grew up on the same side . desperate for connection , desperate for a place , he finds it all in heaven and hell .

#neongraves:intro #. 𝐒𝐈𝐖𝐎𝐍 𝐑𝐘𝐔 ➤ DEVELOPMENT .#this is A Lot #but i had so many notes for myself #let's see how this pans #chaos reigns always

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cottonwren · 5 years

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Can you write me something with Ada and Freddie (or not if you wish) and can you include the following: a phone message, hot chocolate and a single flower.

Hi lovely! I really hope you enjoy this

Pairing: Ada Shelby x Freddie Thorne

Words:1947

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“Ada, love, you know he’s going to come back, and you know you’re going to get him straight back without any hesitation. No point in getting worked up when you’ve got other things to focus on.” Polly told Ada as she watched her write - it was Christmas, everyone was staying in Tommy’s for the holiday, and everyone apparently meant everyone except Freddie Thorne.

Ada understood that he had a duty to his party, and really, she did. Ada’s patience wore thin, however, when Freddie got arrested at every other protest that he went on and her own family had to fork out money so that he could be at home with them. She knew that one day that the money would not be enough, and a Campbell lookalike would come along, and he’d be gone for a year. Ada didn’t think about the possibility of death.

Shelbies didn’t do death.

“I’m going to be pissed at him first, Pol.” She told her aunt, watching Charlie and Karl play on the carpet with their soldiers. “Wonderful, this shit. Married life.”

“Don’t worry, he’s going to be stuck in a car with Thomas and Alfie, then I’m going to talk with him.” Polly told her, watching the kids over a glass of whiskey.

“Thanks Pol,” Ada chuckled, shaking her head. “Bloody watchdogs, the lot of you.”

“Pissed!” Karl squealed, happy to have learnt a new word.

“Where the fuck did he learn that?” Tommy asked as he walked in, accompanied only by Alfie. No Freddie in sight. Ada visibly drops, and the anger furthers itself.

“More to the point, Tom, where the fuck is my husband?” Ada asked back, setting her notepad down and standing up. Every second that she went without knowing was a second that she was convinced they’d done it this time. They’d locked her man up.

“Your husband stopped on the way. Should be back in an hour, I reckon.” Alfie grunted from behind Tommy, tapping him on the thigh gently and moving past him to sit down.

“Tommy, a word.” Ada told him - it would have been a request from anyone else, but Tommy knew his sister better than to take it as anything but a command.

Once they were in Tommy’s office, tucked away and out of earshot even if Ada shouted, Ada nearly did just that. She nearly shouted so hard that she passed out, she was so angry, so full of rage, but she didn’t.

Instead, Ada hugged Tommy. Which is how Tommy knew that it must be bad, and Freddie deserved the hiding that he and Alfie had given him in the car.

“I’m so pissed at him.” Were the first words that came out of Ada’s mouth, muffled against his tailored suit.

“He knows.” Tommy hummed, wrapping his arms back around her, remembering the time that she’d bitten a teacher’s finger off and come to him first with a red face and watery eyes.

“I’m more worried than pissed. Makes me more pissed.” Ada admitted, reaching behind him to find a bottle of whiskey and succeeding. She broke from the hug to take a sip, offering him the bottle.

“That’s love. I think. I’m still figuring this shit out myself. Freddie promised me he’d be back here tonight with a decent apology, otherwise not only would I break his kneecaps, but so would Alfie. Alfie was threatening a lot worse but we settled on kneecaps.” Tommy told her honestly, taking a sip. “How are you?”

“I’m alright. Too worried about this to be anything else. Keep thinking I’ll be one of those women who has to take their kid to see their dad in prison.” Ada sighed, sitting up on the desk.

“I won’t let that happen, Ade. You know that.” Tommy told her, clearing up the desk.

“You shouldn’t have to stop it from happening, that’s the point. I’m going to put Karl to bed, it’s late Want me to take Charlie up as well? They should go down easy.” Ada asked, walking towards the door, whiskey still in hand after Tommy handed it back.

“I’ll take them up, I’m Karl’s favourite anyway.” Tommy told her, unusually pleasant. It unsettled Ada - she had only seen this side of him in youth and dire situations. They were not young anymore, nor were they in a dire situation. Were they?

Ada nodded, thanking him and walking into the living room. She was greeted by Finn cross legged on her seat, reading what she’d written. If it was anyone else she’d be a little annoyed, but Finn? She was proud that he wanted to read - that he could read.

“Ada, this is really good. Is it for a publication?” Finn asked as she said goodnight to her son and her nephew, sending them up with Tommy.

“Yeah, The Call. I’ve been writing for them for a while - it’s shit pay but I enjoy doing it, and I’m working on some bigger things that will hopefully pay a bit more.” Without Freddie’s position as a blinder, Ada would have had to accepted money off of Tommy whilst they were raising Karl. Socialism was all fun and games until you relied on it to feed and clothe growing boy.

“I’ll buy an issue that you’ve written in if I can, Ade.” Finn told her, having supported all of her previous ventures before he could read them - all about the sentiment, he decided.

Soon after Karl and Charlie had gone to bed, everyone else did.

Everyone but Ada, that is, who sat up and waited for Freddie. The clock managed to go slower with every second, and she wanted to sleep. She’d finished up the first draft of her article and had learnt not to edit drunk, even though she was tipsy at most. Ada didn’t want Karl to wake up to a mum with a hangover.

The Shelby family had already got enough alcoholics. Ada was not one of them.

It had hit midnight, and Ada had had enough. She was promised an hour or two, she had waited four. It was now the next day, and Ada was walking up the stairs. Freddie had been arrested, and would have been home four hours ago - the same time as Tommy and Alfie - if he really wanted to be there, he would have been.

“Ade!” Called a voice, followed by rampant running through the hall - Mary would be offended by the dirty footsteps on the floor she so diligently checked every morning, but would make no comment because the pay more than compensate for the fact that she worked for complete crackheads. Not literally, anymore, though.

Ada spun on her heel, arms crossed around her waist, journal in hand. Who else would she see than Freddie. Her own love, her own equal. Relief flooded her veins when she saw him, only paralleled by the rush of anger.

“Where the fuck were you?” Ada hissed, glaring him out. She was too angry, too tired to have a screaming match, so she just hissed.

Freddie found that scarier.

“I had to get my stuff, and I got you flowers, and other stuff, and fuck, Ada, I’m sorry.” Freddie apologised, racing towards her. “Is Karl okay?”

“About Karl - he’s fine. He wouldn’t be fine though, Freddie, if this was the time that they decided that no bail could get you out. If I had to drive to prison every saturday so that our son knew he had a dad? If I had to drive to prison every saturday to see my husband? For what? Freddie, I can’t do this without you!” Ada told him in a hushed yell, shaking as she let it out.

“That’s not going to happen, alright? It’s not going to happen. Even in all of the alternate universes, there’s not one where I don’t stay.” Freddie told her honestly, hand gently cupping her jaw.

“We’ll talk about alternate universes later; you’re very wrong. Right now I want to know why the fuck the dead Karl Marx is more important than the real Karl upstairs, who asked where Daddy was and I had to distract him with trains.” Ada explained, pointing up the stairs to where Karl was sleeping with Charlie a few rooms down. “I have to explain why Daddy sometimes doesn’t come home.”

Ada watched as her words registered on Freddie’s face, and waited for his reply. She had no idea what she needed to hear, but she knew that she needed something other than sorry.

“Ade, I took the time to think - both in the cell and whilst Tom and Alfie were threatening to mutilate me. I keep putting the cause in front of you and Karl, and it’s not right - it’s not what I married you to do.” Freddie told her, just happy that she hadn’t ran away yet or told him to get fucked.

“I didn’t marry you to never see you either, Fred.” Ada told him, most of the anger seeping from her, leaving only the relief that he wasn’t dead. “Tom did say that Alfie was being nice.”

“I have a feeling he was.” He chuckled, scratching the back of his neck.

Ada laughed, nodding. “He probably was.”

“So, back to this. Ade. Promise you I’ll do my best not to get arrested - actually, this time - and I’ll be at home more.” Freddie promised, aware that there was still a car boot full of things in the drive if she accepted his promise, including the flowers that he hoped weren’t wilting.

“Good. Now if I’d have heard that three hours earlier…” Ada mused, smirking.

“I got you flowers!” He protested, kissing her cheek.

“Where are they then?” She teased, pulling him back in for an actual kiss. “Go get the stuff - I’d help you but it’s fucking freezing.”

“Hot chocolate?” Freddie asked, walking back down the stairs with her.

“I would love some. I’ll be in the lounge, I’ll help you take the stuff up when we go up.”

“Great.” Freddie thought he probably deserved to be the one making hot chocolate at that moment so he didn’t comment.

Freddie had a suitcase in one hand and a single flower in the other, making Ada grin as she saw him. Something about that smile of his reminded her why she loved him in the first place, of the time spent under the bridge, sitting on coats.

“A single flower for Mrs Thorne.” He smiled, dropping the suitcase down carefully and giving her the flower on a bent knee.

Ada took it in between her fingers, then pulled Freddie up to sit next to her.

“It’d be more, but they got damaged on the way.” He told her, wrapping an arm around her and letting himself just breathe. God, he loved her so much. If only he knew how to express it.

Ada hooked the flower through her buttonhole and shook her head. “It’s perfect.”

“I’m glad, love. Still want that hot chocolate?” Freddie asked, not wanting to move from her. A day was too long, especially when he was aware that it could be the time he had forgotten to say I love you before walking out the house that morning.

“I’d love some.” She nodded, sinking back into the sofa as he left to boil the kettle. Typical, she thought, her aunt was right again. It had taken a remarkable thirty minutes, and everything was normal again.

Ada wouldn’t really have it any other way, though - she needed him, her equal, her best friend, her biggest annoyance. They needed eachother, and no policeman, no brother, no son, no queen, nor anyone else could take that from them.

#peaky blinder fanfic #Peaky Blinders #peaky blinder #peaky blinder headcanon #peaky blinders fanfiction #Ada Thorne #Ada Shelby #freddie #freddie thorne #ada thorne imagine #ada shelby imagine #freddie thorne x ada shelby #ada shelby x freddie thorne #ask #req #twistedrunes #old writing

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douxreviews · 6 years

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True Detective - ‘The Hour and the Day’ Review

“I wanna know the whole story.”

The fourth True Detective episode usually features a big action scene that solidifies the halfway point in the story. The harrowing one-shot sequence in season one. The relentless shooting spree in season two. This is more of a prelude to this season's intense powder-keg separating the first half of the story from the second. It's another way that this new story toys with paying lip service to what came before while contenting itself with being its own thing.

What this does instead is take its sweet time in fleshing out what exactly is going on in each of the three timelines and the states of the characters as they exist within each of those eras. It sets the stage for what comes next in the season, while also being character and dialogue heavy. It also takes more time to explore the themes of the season, which I especially enjoyed.

Racial Divide

The issue of race is finally examined, which I feel the show has been dancing around until now.

I felt it was always in the background, noticeable in the lingering, guarded or just suspicious looks that are directed at Wayne Hays, the black detective in rural Arkansas. I've noticed it from the very first episode. Some people don't realize that prejudice is not always overt. In fact, I'd say a majority of it goes understated or unspoken, in that Travis Bickle sort of way.

The thing is most of the people who regard Hays in this way probably aren't even malicious about it, or would even consider themselves racist; I know people like this. You've got ones like state prosecutor turned Attorney General Daryl Kent who clearly looks down on Hays with this smug, dismissive superiority. Then you've got people like Mrs. Faber who will maintain politeness but always see him as an other, holding that look of thinly veiled fear and suspicion. Then there's guys like Tom Purcell, who'll drop racial slurs in moments of anger or frustration and then quickly feel ashamed; that reaction exists somewhere in their upbringing, but they know it's wrong.

No matter the shade in which it presents itself, there's no doubt it sticks in the craw of men as dignified as Hays.

Or men who aren't, as displayed when Hays and West pay a visit to Sam Whitehead, a possible lead on the one-eyed black man who bought the ominous dolls. Was his immediate rabble-rousing and accusations of racial profiling and witch-hunts just a natural reaction from an old black man who has experienced decades of injustice from white cops, or was it an easy way of avoiding direct answers to the questions he was asked? It's not entirely clear.

The hectic encounter with Whitehead and the other residents of that local ghetto did highlight the nuanced dynamic between Hays and West, which I've enjoyed throughout this season. While clearly a bit of a good ole' boy, West does not seem prejudiced. He even seems rather progressive for a man of his era, region and occupation, given his deep respect for his partner and stony admonition of Tom for his aforementioned drunken insult toward Hays. And Hays, while constantly on his toes about the racial divide between them, seems to recognize West's empathic quality, even enjoys it when West jokingly needles him about this sensitivity. It's another reason I dig this partnership, that understanding between two no-nonsense individuals.

Another character who appears not to be clouded by the resident race elephant is the priest at the Catholic church attended by the Purcells. Although West distrusts him on account of being a priest -- which would make even more sense today than in 1980 -- the man is very helpful in organizing his congregation to aid the detectives. He seems sincere in his assessment of Will and Julie and he hopes Hays, a former altar boy, would be open to confession. Nice guy, but there were certain things about his scenes that made me wonder if he might be involved in what happened to the kids.

Couples Counseling

More personal than societal, but equally important are the various relationships we are faced with in this story. It's heavily suggested that they have quite a bit of bearing on what's going on.

The big one is Wayne and Amelia's relationship. The contrast between their blossoming romance in 1980 and their rocky marriage in 1990 is very striking. We first see that the later stage is marred by feelings of resentment from Wayne and accusations of inadequacy from Amelia, despite the love they still share. After ten years, they've become worn down by the flaws and neurotic tendencies they seemed so excited about discovering at the start of their romance.

The first dinner date between Hays and Amelia was certainly the best scene in the episode. It was very cute, even sexy in a surprisingly subtle way. And their dialogue back and forth was just wonderful. Despite being so different in terms of background, occupation, politics and temperament, there was an instant chemistry that both recognized. Almost like these two people who each claim to have never wanted marriage or kids saw in each other the possibility of a future together in this first foray into intimacy.

Initially, though, there's Tom and Lucy Purcell. A couple whose furiously tumultuous marriage bred an unhappy family life, which may have played a factor in their children's secretive meetings with mysterious strangers and their eventual abduction.

Amelia gains an insight into this as she tries to comfort the distraught Lucy, and ends up getting the feeling that Lucy might be hiding something and ends up getting cursed out by the latter thanks addressing it. Not a very good first attempt at junior detective work, but she may have just unearthed a clue without realizing it. Lucy claimed that "Children should laugh", the same phrase included in the cryptic letter sent by Julie's abductor. Either Lucy was just wistfully acknowledging the logic of that message or it could be that she had something to do with what befell her children. It's still ambiguous.

As for Tom, we get to see the beginning of his and West's odd friendship as West gives the heartbroken Tom a place to stay away from his sad home. It's another indication that West is a naturally empathetic person, despite occasionally coming off as a hardass. Though it might be that his empathy has dampened somewhat in the years since.

It's a shame that the 1980 dynamic between Hays and West doesn't return when Hays is brought on board the task force of the second Purcell case ten years later. A shame, but realistic. No way the dynamic is the same after Hays got the shaft and West became the successful, award-winning career lawman who shook hands with young, pre-controversy Bill Clinton. And the fact that Hays, lead detective on the original case, is now expected to follow West's lead doesn't help. No-nonsense or not, old friends or not, pride asserts itself. To put it bluntly, dicks will inevitably be measured and pissing contested.

Haunted Houses

Now let's get more cerebral. The first season's tagline was "Touch darkness, and darkness touches you back", vey Nietzsche-like. That seems to be a constant theme throughout this series. The ways in which human horror and trauma can have dramatic effects on a person's sense of self and their reality. How they might serve as some explanation of what we see as the spiritual, supernatural and even paranormal.

It's introduced well-enough. Tom and Lucy Purcell feel trapped in their house, the place where the kids, the only thing that united them, were raised. Tom can't stay there, broken by their absence. And Lucy seems to stay in it as self-imposed prison for her failings as a mother. A disturbing situation where the place that is meant to be home feels more like hell.

The Hays household experiences a similar phenomena later, which Old Hays admits. He came to believe his unending obsession with the case infected Amelia and their children, sullying their chances at a stable, happy family. That he ended up cursing them with his own restless demons.

This takes on what could be a more literal meaning as Old Hays finds himself reminiscing on the past at the same time he struggles to beat back the ghosts in his mind. It's an incredibly haunting scene, watching him struggle to grasp the memories of his life as men he killed in Vietnam (and one caucasian man in a suit) close in and hover over him like phantoms, whispering, accusing. And the show has played so fast and loose with the line between psychologically unhinged experiences and what might be darker forces that exist on the fringes of existence. Rustin Cohle had his drug-induced visions which at times appeared to grant him insights into hidden otherworldly realms. Ray Velcoro's near death experience offered a bizarre yet prophetic glimpse into a possible afterlife. Now Wayne Hays' years of multi-faceted PTSD compounded by dementia conjure menacing ghosts from the past.

"Purple" Hays, indeed.

Escalating Confusion

But themes aside, the more concrete plot points are there as well.

In 2015, a dogged Old Hays enlists his son -- revealed to be an Arkansas State Police detective like his father once was -- in finding West to help him remember the details of the two Purcell cases. To my surprise, he tells Elisa Montgomery in their private meeting that the 1990 case haunts him most of all. Elisa informs him that she and her team of investigators discovered that the skeletal remains of Dan O'Brian, Lucy Purcell's cousin and suspect in both cases, were recently found in a drained quarry after he went missing around the time of the second case.

Which is interesting, because Dan O'Brian was already missing prior to 1990.

But Hays makes a possibly huge development in the second case when he spots a mysterious young woman who could very well be a grown up Julie Purcell on the security footage of the store where her prints were found.

Meanwhile, in 1980, Hays and West end up traumatizing Freddy Burns when his prints are discovered on Will's abandoned bike; I'd totally forgotten him drunkenly riding it at Devil's Den in the first episode.

The detectives and feds are drawn away from this obvious red herring when they catch wind of the redneck lynch mob advancing on Brett Woodard's home, who has prepared for this event with a military arsenal that's sure to deliver on the action spectacle we've all been waiting for.

Bits and Pieces:

* “The Hour and the Day” was co-written by David Milch, creator of Deadwood. This explains why the characters, dialogue and themes felt even richer than usual in this episode. Milch is almost as acerbic and literary as Nic Pizzolato, if not more.

* There's a framed picture of a brunette woman on West's desk in 1990. I'm betting that's Lori, the girl he was putting the moves on at the church.

* Hays sarcastically raising his hand during a briefing was another fun little callback to the first season.

* Not sure if it was explicitly stated before, but Kent, the state prosecutor in 1980, appears to have blatantly used the Purcell case to snag himself the Attorney General office. What a guy.

* Black Sabbath has been around since the late ‘60s. Seems kind of strange that a bunch of men in their 30s act as if it’s some strange new thing in the early '80s. Perhaps its mainstream recognition in my generation is simply coloring my perspective.

* During his ghostly encounter, Old Hays makes note of a dark sedan that is staking out his house.

Quotes:

Amelia (1990): Let go of me, Wayne. Hays (1990): Stop talking shit about me! Amelia (1990): Or what? Hays (1990): … Or I’m gonna start crying. Wasn’t expecting that.

Sam Whitehead: And you. How’re you gonna wear that badge? Hays: It’s got a little clip on it. Ha!

Hays: Can we say this was anonymous vandals? West: We’re not going with irate negroes?

Hays (1990): We ain’t doing any of that shit they just said, right? West (1990): Wasn’t planning on it.

Priest: Would you like to confess now? Hays: I reckon I’ll let it pile up a little more.

Hays: Thing of it is, Father, we’re about ninety percent sure that whoever took Julie or Will are one of yours. Priest: I find it difficult to believe that anyone here could something like that. Hays: They don’t exactly wear a signboard says “psycho killer.”

Four out of five Claymore mines.

Logan Cox

#True Detective #Wayne Hays #Mahershala Ali #Roland West #Stephen Dorff #Doux Reviews #TV Reviews

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rhapsody-under-pressure · 6 years

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Moonlight Magic pt 7

“You two doing okay? I haven’t seen either of you two sit near each other for over a week!”

As soon as Roger asked the question, his lip curled up into a sneer. He took a vicious bite out of the red apple in his hand, scoffing a second later in response. Even with a week passing, he didn’t dare speak to Freddie until he wanted to apologise; it wasn’t like he hadn’t tried either, he had done so multiple times in the past week but Freddie just wouldn’t accept any form of talk with him. Freddie would gladly go speak to John or Roger, but as soon as he appeared, he either silenced himself or straight up left the room altogether. Of course it didn’t surprise him, he’d done this plenty of times in the past, often over petty little reasons too, but never did they occur so close to the moon. The mere thought of Freddie trying to get through the night by himself terrified him and yet, he couldn’t help but let his current contempt corrupt his thoughts. Let him go try it, see how hard it is by himself! Was a recurring thought over the past two days; with the day now upon them, however, he couldn’t help but let it start to worry him that it would indeed become true.

“Splendid! Absolutely peachy!” Brian exclaimed, taking another chunk out of his apple, the idea now not even bothering him while his anger simmered once more. “Lousy bastard can’t admit he’s wrong for the life of him! Always tries to be the mediator with shit like this when he’s almost always the cause!” He continued, tossing the apple core to the ground. “God and then he pulls this silent treatment with me instead of just talking.”

“It’s Fred. What, is he pissed about someone meddling with his clothes? Or did someone claim dogs were better?” Roger asked, laughing at his own suggestions right after.

Despite his instant panic at the true answer, Brian just shrugged it off, only revealing a sliver of the truth. “I wish I knew! I try to help him out with so much but then he barks at me for being too involved. He’s needy as all hell though and God forbid if I’m not there when he needs me.”

“Bah, give ‘im time, Bri.” Roger answered. “Probably just pissy again cause of exams coming up and whatnot. I mean I don’t even see him eat now and the guy looks like he hasn’t seen the sun in a year! Though, a few other sixth years look like that too and to be honest, I can see why. Fifth years are still worse; good lord have you seen some of them? Those O.W.Ls are scaring them shitless!” He said.

“Don’t act like you’re not nervous either.” Brian added.

“Trust me, I’m in a similar boat as them all.” Fear started to light up his face. “I mean, my whole life is basically riding on how well I do on these tests and I can’t fathom failing any of them. I’ve already seen big old Ts haunting me in my dreams.” He bit down on his bottom lip before finishing. “I guess we’ll just have to see! Bet they’re all just hyping up how hard they are so that we study more.”

Brian only scoffed, knowing full well that Roger had a lot in store if he wanted to believe that tripe. With the bell ringing, the two parted ways. Roger was dashing off towards his class, whatever exactly it was, he didn’t know; for now he headed off towards his defense class, wondering what “surprises” Jenk had in store for them. Perhaps more spells he’d learned already so that he could keep Freddie’s ass safe or some more useless facts he’d memorised the prior year to make sure they wouldn’t fall behind in any of their classes. Amazing, absolutely amazing how much time he’d put into keeping this thing a secret and what did he get in repayment? Nothing, just him being an absolute prick towards him. What he wouldn’t give to hear him say that he was sorry, sorry for what he’d said and done over the past few years and that he would just stop acting like a complete child over something this serious.

He growled as he marched down the hall, ignoring the other students who wanted to get in his way-did these kids not know what speed was-and shoved them off when necessary, earning a few nasty stares from some of the younger years. The door to his class was already open, Jenk’s hard stare meeting his for a quick second before parting. Without hesitation, he laid his work down on his desk and sat in the back, not wanting to be up front and deal with the same stuff over and over again.

As expected, it was the same old stuff again. Jenk went on about various spells: disarming and stunning (something he’d learned back in his fifth year), when to use them (something that should just be common sense), and a quick recap of dementors (a creature he knew plenty about). He mentioned how they’d start working on patroni next class after acquiring a boggart to practice with them, mentioning how Dumbledore had given him the idea. That was the only interesting part of the class and made him perk up, something he seemed to share with much of the class. Jenk smiled warmly, knowing that this was one of the surefire ways to get teenagers’ attention: dangerous activities that might kill them. After that quick announcement, he went over the creature even more so, repeating facts and attacks that Brian already knew, killing the little bit of attention that he had for those few seconds.

Despite every attempt he made, he couldn’t get his mind off of a mock argument in his mind. Constant possible retorts to anything Freddie might say continued to pop up as the class continued on. God couldn’t he just not think about him for once? Maybe then he’d actually get to pay attention, even if it was stuff he’d learned already; anything was more interesting at this point, even if that meant watching a plant grow in herbology. Brian had put up with this for years, shouldn’t he be bored of this? Revising the usual events that would have to go on tomorrow night, if he even wanted to go help out that ungrateful little brat, and then having to deal with John-John...His eyes widened at the thought. It wasn’t the same thing, they had John to deal with. The little fourth year had no idea what it was like and was probably as anxious as Freddie was, though in all the wrong ways; he must be bustling with anticipation to see a werewolf for the first time and completely immune to any fear over what that creature actually did. Brian, in all honesty, couldn’t fathom the idea of being in the same room as another one ever again. Maybe that’s what was keeping him so fixated upon this argument; proving Freddie wrong might mark some kind of change in their relationship and one change often led to another.

“Mr. May, would you like to answer the question?”

Jenk’s booming voice struck him like a tree branch, snapping out of his stupor as both the Ravenclaws and Gryffindors stared at him, awaiting the answer to a question he didn’t know.

“Well?” Jenk asked, “Why are dementors used in Azkaban?”

He took in a deep breath, wracking his brain for a composed answer in the few more seconds of silence that followed. “They’re used there to literally suck the soul out of the prisoners there, ensuring that none would escape due to being left in an empty state. They don’t use the kiss, but they do remove much of the happiness left in the prisoners because if they don’t have any happiness, they’re only left with their worst memories.”

“Very good Mr. May, five points to Ravenclaw.” Jenk said, now returning to the lesson, beaming after getting a well worded answer from one of his students, though Brian knew if any other student had answered the way he had, they would’ve gotten far more than five points. See! There it was again! The fact that all his hard work that he’d put into keeping Freddie safe was now harming the rest of their house. If Jenk didn’t know he was ahead in the class, they could’ve gotten more points and gotten closer to winning the cup! Brian angrily sighed, looking back down at his open book that was probably on the wrong page anyway. Forget it, just forget it. If he wants to believe that he can handle this on his own to prove something to me, fine, let him. He can do whatever the hell he wants and that’s fine.

…

With night now falling, Brian was left completely alone. Both John and Roger were in their perspective houses, unless they’d snuck out to be together in some undisclosed location, and Freddie, as expected, wouldn’t say a word to him. When he’d gone into the dorm, he saw his figure buried beneath his blankets, either fast asleep or pretending to do so. He only scoffed at him, wishing that he had the nerve to whack a pillow across that bastard’s face. In the end, he just grabbed his things and went down the the common room, staring at the purple flames that were brightly lit, curling into little blue wisps that contrasted the golden embers beneath. He just stared and stared, his mind drawing a blank after it going completely nuts earlier.

A soft tapping came from behind him. In the light of the almost full moon sat a rather large owl, a letter sitting in his beak as he continued to tap at the glass with his talons. Brian got up, raising an eyebrow in curiosity as he unlocked the window to let the large bird in.

“Felix!? What’re you doing here?” He asked, seeing his family’s own just ruffle his feathers in response and stick out the letter towards him. Brian took the letter, Felix giving a loud squawk and earning a harsh “SH!” in response.

“Go to the Owlrey, you can go home tomorrow, okay?” Brian asked, Felix seeming to understand enough to fly off, leaving him only with the crackling of both the flames and the envelope.

Brian,

Your father’s fallen ill. The doctors aren’t too sure what it is right now but we want you to come home to be with us just in case something happens. We know how much you care about your studies and we hope that you don’t have much work to worry about at school. Dumbledore knows of the circumstances, we told him with another owl. Let us know as soon as possible.

Mum

A short message, but those dried tear stains told him why it was so abrupt. Brian could only sit down on the floor once more, constantly re-reading the letter until he’d memorised every single word in the message; the weight on his chest was continuing to build with every passing second while his mind rushed with questions. How could they not know what was going on? Was it really that serious? If so, couldn’t they have sent something sooner? No, he couldn’t blame anyone right now. Right now, Brian’s mind was focused on rushing up to Dumbledore’s study.

Before he stepped out of the room, Brian paused, giving a quick glance behind him towards the staircase up to the dormitories. He looked down at the letter, folding it up carefully and sticking it into his pocket next to his wand. As quietly as possible, he walked up the steps and entered his room. Just like before, Freddie was fast asleep, completely immune to his surroundings for the next few hours. In the soft moonlight his skin looked even paler and turned the back of his head silver. Brian clenched his jaw and walked over to his bag, pulling out a sheet of paper and a quill, wetting the tip with his tongue and scribbling out a quick message for Freddie. Without another thought, he laid it on the nightstand and left.

Wasting no time, Brian hurried down the halls towards Dumbledore’s study, dashing up the stairs until he stood in front of the massive gargoyle statue, its golden eyes staring right through his soul. In his frantic state, he could barely think, let alone remember the damned password that he’d put up for him to enter. He rambled off every sweet he could think of, starting with toffee until he ended up at ice pops, wondering what the hell he had put as the password.

“Mr. May?”

A serene voice came from behind him. He turned and saw the headmaster staring at him from behind his half-moon glasses, those piercing blue eyes showing not a bit of anger or wonder. Before Brian could even try to respond, Dumbledore stepped forward, his elegant, maroon robes flowing behind him.

“Bubblegum.” He said, the gargoyle now hopping off its pedestal to let them through.

Where on earth do you get that from? Brian asked, now following the headmaster into his office.

He said nothing to him, he just held out his hand, Brian giving him a confused look for a moment before handing out the letter to him. He gave a quick glance over the letter, a glimmer dancing across his eyes before he tucked it into his robes.

“I understand there’s issues at home. You need not specify anything, your mother gave enough in the letter she gave me.” He said, giving nothing else before walking over to his enormous fireplace. A loud squawk sounded from his right, Brian jumping until he saw Fawkes looking down at him from his perch, now cleaning his wings and completely ignoring his presence. The room turned green, Brian watching the flames lose every shade of red and yellow and glow a brilliant emerald with streaks of white.

“If you need anything you might’ve left here, send an owl.” Dumbledore said, now stepping back to give him time to get in.

“T-thank you sir.” Brian replied, now thankful that his lungs had recovered from his running.

He gave a warm smile, that sight being the last thing before Brian called out his home address before stepping into the flames.

…

“THAT BLOODY BASTARD!”

Shreds of paper laid on the floor as Freddie crushed them beneath his foot, his knuckles going white as he bared his clenched teeth; his face was heating up as every part of him burned with anger. He just left! Left without saying a single word to him and left a note to explain it all! What kind of audacity does someone have to have in order to do that?!

Freddie collapsed onto his bed behind him, his body groaning in pain at the mere act of ripping the letter into little pieces. Yet the anger burned on, trying its best to ignore the stress it was putting onto his already tired body. How could he? How the hell could he? He couldn’t bother to tell him? Hell he could’ve done so much more than leave a little letter that said “Dad’s sick, going home.” That there was such a big help! Absolutely amazing! Freddie growled again, wishing he could rip the paper up once more.

His heart began to sink as the weight upon his chest grew. Did he really not care about him? Was he so obsessed with himself that he didn’t bother treating him like an equal? Or was he starting to realise what he was and felt like he didn’t have to treat him like a human anymore-just someone who was sick and not important. To make matters worse, he had left today. Of all days he chose today. I don’t need him. He tried telling himself. I don’t, John’s there and-what’re you on about, you don’t need either of them! He pushed himself up into a seated position, shivering in his spot as he tried heating up his icy hands. As much as he tried to ignore the impending night, his mind just couldn’t shake the usual fears: hurting someone, hurting himself beyond repair, someone else getting infected; it all was just terrifying and Freddie could already feel his stomach start to twist within him.

He doesn’t care. He couldn’t possibly care. Tears started welling up at the corner of his eyes. He’ll never see you as anything but a nuisance. He wanted to scream everything right at Brian’s face or just throw a book right at it. What kind of nerve did he have to have to think he could do this to him? Surely he couldn’t hate him that much, right? So what if he hadn’t talked to him for days, that was Brian’s fault; if he didn’t want to apologise, then that’s on him. He wasn’t giving in first because Brian thought he was right. Every single time he was too stubborn, something bad happened.

Something bad happened...Freddie turned to look down at his blankets. Why did he think that? He ran his hand along the duvet, the very same texture being the one Brian had brought to him one morning. His mind could only throw flashing images at him for a few seconds: the hulking outline of the beast, the door smashing right into its muzzle, Brian’s petrified face. He didn’t know that he’d seen him, nor did he want him to know.

He was fifteen again. Brian was practically carrying him at this point, his hands trembling as he tried to hold him there while finding his wand in his pocket. The door had formed in front of them, Brian rushing through with him as he already felt his clothes grow tighter around his arms and chest. The room was suffocating and the beast was already trying to rip itself out of Brian’s hold around him. While using his last remaining willpower, Freddie just pushed Brian away as hard as he could before collapsing onto the ground. A blood-curdling cry echoed off the walls as his nails ripped through the fabric of his outfit.

The scene froze on Brian’s terrified face, constantly zooming closer and closer so that he could try and find out what was going through his mind. How could someone have so much going on in their mind in just one second: fear, worry, anger, a convoluted storm of so many emotions that they turned his eyes glassy and unfocused, almost reverting back to their primal state where everything centered around the idea of “survive”.

Everything grew hazy in front of him, Freddie finally blinking to wash away the last bit of the memory. He grabbed his blankets, trying to stabilize himself. Nothing seemed to want to work though: thinking about good things, focusing on his current surroundings, even smacking his hand against the nightstand to try and feel something different wasn’t doing anything. He could still feel the cold floor on his hands and the putrid drool that dribbled down the side of the beasts mouth. When the fact that it’d all happen tonight struck him, his eyes flew back open as his body began to twitch and shake.

Do something, try something. He got up from his spot, his knees shaking and hindering his ability to walk in a straight line; the floor seemed to be made of spikes, every step jabbing at his aching legs and soles of his feet as he finally made his way to the door. His mind began fighting with itself: the desperate half began whining at him to go get Brian so that he’d have some help while the stubborn half absolutely refused to even think of him. Remember, he left you. His lip curled up into a sneer as he swung the door open, slowly making his way down the stairs and covering up as much of his body with his cloak to avoid any probing questions from the other Ravenclaws in the common room. Thankfully, he gained no attention from the others; it seemed that majority of them were more focused on their studies than their surroundings.

Should he just go sulk in the library? Or go down to the dining hall for something to eat, yeah like that was going to happen. He turned to his left, seeing a cloudless sky in the distance. Unlike the rest of winter so far, it was no longer grey and instead gave the impression that it was a warm day in spring. He could almost see the little budding flowers among the green grass while the trees would start to grow their flowers, ranging from a beautiful white to a rosy pink. If he listened hard enough, he could almost hear the chirps of birds in the distance. But upon moving his gaze ever so slightly, Freddie could only see everything that ruined this illusion: frost still along the sides of the trees that were barren of any life, an absence of any green in the rolling fields, and absolutely no songs from any birds. Maybe in the distance there could be some kind of sign of change, perhaps it wasn’t going to be seen to the naked eye just yet, but spring would come, just as it always would.

He took a seat beneath the giant tree in the middle of the courtyard; no one was outside-who would want to be outside when it was that cold out-yet Freddie didn’t mind; the silence was wonderful, almost a gift to help ease his thoughts. Even with his body feeling so tired, a calm blanket was spreading over his mind. He reached out, playing around with a few strands of grass, the frost upon the tips melting immediately upon touching his fingertips. Every blade glistened in the light of day and made them look more white than green. A small wind blew from behind him, Freddie releasing his hold on those little pieces and watched them dance in the wind. Another wind blew, this time pushing his hair out in front of him and blocking his vision for a quick second. As his vision cleared, he could only see his still outstretched hand, the skin beneath his nails now turning a pale purple. Yet he didn’t feel it; none of the cold was penetrating his body. All he could feel in that moment was the sun shining down on his face, the little bit of warmth emanating from it immediately bringing back that feeling of spring. In that moment, right from above him, a little chaffinch flew onto the tree and sung its loud song.

…

Nerves were bouncing around, every inch of his skin was lined with little goosebumps, and as much as he was trying to force himself up from his spot in the library, he didn’t want to move. He didn’t want to see that thing again, not again. His jaw clenched as he looked up at the line of books in front of him, trying to distract his frantic brain from thinking of the night later on. Alas, it wasn’t working-but what would work? Eating-ha! He was instantly sickened by the mere thought of it. Rest in the room until then? Go find one of his friends?

Friends. Were were they? Roger perhaps was studying up in his room, John might be there too, though it was still bizarre as to why he wasn’t here, especially since he had been so excited to learn about tonight. Then there was Brian; should he even call him a friend anymore? Anyone who just left like that shouldn’t even be called that. Coward perhaps. Brian didn’t even want to say a single word to him before leaving because he was scared. Oh how he wanted to scream every curse at him or hurl a book right at his face.

He leaned over into his bag, tearing out a sheet of paper and his wand. The words immediately came out, Freddie spitting out every single thing he wanted to bark at Brian if he was right there in front of him. His wand collected every single word he read out over the next five minutes, Freddie barely pausing for a breath until he finished his rant. He put the tip upon the sheet of paper, watching it fold itself into a neat, crimson envelope.

With his anger now fueling him, he leapt up and marched right on out, shoving his way through the bustling crowds of students who were going back up to their dorms. A select few seemed to also be heading towards the Owlery, for they too were carrying little parcels or letters that must’ve been going back home, but he was the only one with a crimson letter tucked under his arm.

By the time he’d arrived, he could already see the sun start to set. His skin prickled with fear, but he pressed on, calling down one of the school owls and quickly tied the letter to its leg. He told the little bird Brian’s address, the owl taking no time in flying right on out the window. Freddie turned to head out, only to join the other students in the Owlery who were now staring over at the hunched over frame of a student who seemed close to passing out.

“John? What the hell are you doing here?” Freddie asked, John now looking back up at him with a panicky look in his eyes and readjusting the little bag he had around his shoulder.

“Ah-uh-well I was gonna try and...catch you to...eh...show you something?” He began, his face, somehow, turning darker under the confused gazes of the other students. “H-how about I go show you?”

Freddie growled under his breath and stomped forward, his own face starting to burn under the stares from the others. He grabbed John’s sleeve and marched forward, another wave of chills hitting his body once he stepped outside. As they walked down the steps, John uttered multiple apologies, all of which Freddie just ignored, his main focus being on getting back inside the castle.

“John, it’s fine, alright? Just stop your blubbering!” He snarled, John instantly shutting up from behind him.

“I-I just wanted to make sure everything was alright. I-I couldn’t find Brian and I got worried so I just...chased after you.”

“Oh don’t worry, no one can find Brian here!” He mockingly said. “That little prick went right on home without saying a single word to any of us! Not only that, he found it absolutely brilliant to just write a few words down to explain what was going on. Selfish little brat!”

“Wait, what did happen?”

“His father’s sick. Wish I knew what! But nope! Just left without specifying! Well, he can have fun with that howler. Maybe he’ll learn what an explanation is!” Freddie spat, his jaw winding up so tightly that his teeth might crack.

Upon entering the hallway, Freddie fell silent. He could already see the darkening sky outside and his fear silenced any of the once burning anger inside. He paused, his body not wanting to move any closer to the room. Those childish thoughts returned: don’t let me go in! I don’t wanna! I’m sick of this! Someone, help me...John reached out and grabbed his hand, giving a reassuring smile towards him as he lead him towards the room. Freddie just stood there, tightly gripping his sleeves as John paced back and forth three times. In a matter of seconds, the door formed, John holding it open for him as he brought himself to walk in.

He raised an eyebrow at the sight in front of him. It looked, almost homey, and yet there wasn’t a single piece of furniture. The room was a good size, roughly a dozen metres long and wide and a large window sat to the left, the navy blue sky already starting to give way to the blackness of night. Freddie just sat down on the carpet, not wanting to look around any longer. His body was already giving its occasional convulsion, all those memories starting to swarm around and only intensify his current fears.

Something struck him right in the stomach: what if something happened to him tonight? Was the last thing Brian would ever hear from him be anger? No, no it wouldn’t be, when has anything terrible happened? Surely it wouldn’t just start tonight! Right? His eyes began to water. What good was worrying going to do him? Brian obviously didn’t care about him. He might just open the howler up as soon as it got there and tune it out. His whimpering grew louder; was everything they had nothing? Did he really not matter to him? After everything they’d done together and been through nonetheless, was it just that easy for Brian to move on from him?

“Fred, you alright?” John asked.

Freddie finally became aware of John’s presence and turned to face him. Immediately, he shouted “No! No I’m not alright! Brian’s gone...A-and it’s my own fault!”

“He’ll be back soon though, you can talk to him then.” John told him.

“Don’t be so daft John! He just left that sort of letter for me! He doesn’t care...I-I know he doesn’t or else he would’ve left something more for me o-or still be here w-with…” He looked towards John. “Why’re you still here?”

“Thought you could use some company.” He replied with a proud smile upon his face.

“Comp-what’re you on about?” He wiped away wet streaks on his cheeks. “Get out of here, I-it doesn’t need company.”

“Come off it Fred, I’m not here for it, I’m for you!” He explained. “Don’t worry, I took precautions.” He motioned to behind him where a brown door sat, Freddie only assuming that another room was behind it.

“What-no! No, no, no. C’mon John, go back to your house and get back down here in the morning.” John stayed still, not budging from his spot, even when Freddie stood up and headed towards him. A look of indignation suddenly appeared on John’s face as he stared right up at him, determination shooting through his eyes.

“Fred, I know enough about these things to know that they’re isolating. You feel alone in here every single time you have to go through this. Since Brian’s never here with you, I’ll do it. I’m not going to have you go through something alone. It’ll help, believe me!” John pleaded.

He backed up ever so slightly as Freddie hovered above him. “John. Get out of here now. You don’t know what they’re capable of.” He ordered.

Out of nowhere, John’s shadow began to grow behind him. Freddie looked down and saw his own shadow interrupt the steady silver light that had already started to fill the room. Just a second of distraction was enough. The fire spread through his body and nearly knocked him right to the ground. As it took hold, Freddie’s ability to speak quickly vanished, despite him still desperately trying to tell John to leave. He could already feel his nails ripping into his outfit and piercing his skin as his clothes grew tighter and tighter around him once more. His groans of pain echoed off the walls of the room, the sound of his outfit ripping to shreds following soon after. Fear gripped his stomach as he managed to catch a quick glimpse of John. Instead of any fear, there was this terribly sad look in his eyes as he stood transfixed to his spot, unable to do anything as he watched his monthly change take hold.

Yet, there was something different this time. As his head and ears started to lengthen, a powerful scent struck the beast’s nose; it smelled of metal and something he couldn’t quite identify, and yet it smelled so familiar. Despite its spine still settling into place and its whole body throbbing with pain, the beast quickly shot up, its blood tainted saliva dribbling out of the corner of its mouth and into a massive puddle on the ground. It wasted no time and immediately leapt forward, aiming right for the door that was now shut with John peering out from behind it, his eyes wide with awe and concern. Both of the aforementioned emotions vanished in an instant as the beast reared up onto its hind legs and crashed into the door, John’s face covered with fear as he backed up, just barely missing the beast’s slashing claws through the little bars in the door’s mini window.

Growls of frustration rang through the small room, Freddie wishing he could block out all the sounds and ignore the sight of his friend right in front of him. God he wished he could yell at John right now; how could he be so stupid to want to be here with this thing? Every snarl, every bark, and every attempt to break through the wood door to finally attack the first human it’d seen in years sent waves of adrenaline through its body, every ounce of focus being put onto John and nothing else. It finally smelled blood other than its own, it finally saw flesh other than its own, and it finally saw the chance to attack and spread its disease with ease; the chance was right there, less than a few metres away from it and the door was blocking it. Freddie was immensely thankful for whatever spells John had placed on the door, but all he could feel was the beast’s ever growing frustration.

Finally, it walked away from the door, realising that this attempt wasn’t going to work. Freddie wished he could plead with it, beg it to go back to attacking itself instead of his friend, but he had no control for the next few hours. He was just a witness, a being trapped inside another’s body as it did whatever it wanted. All he could do was watch it prowl around, occasionally lunging back at the door to try and grab John. Only once did it come close and that was when John walked up to the window to get a better look, to which the beast gladly sprung back at the door and dug its massive paw through the window, the daggers just barely missing John’s face.

At one point, when Freddie was sure that a few hours had passed, the beast walked away. Freddie just repeated a silent apology to John, wishing that he knew how bad he felt that he had to witness this whole ordeal. But the mortal terror he felt an instant later put those apologies up in smoke as the beast went to the back of the room, quickly licking its chops before rearing back onto its hind legs and letting out a blood-curdling howl that bounced off the walls of the room, John’s face appearing in the small window once again. With all its energy, the beast fell onto all fours and rushed forward as fast as it could, slamming its whole body against the door and sinking its teeth into the metal bars of the window. It glared at John, trying its best to yank its claws out of the wood as it snarled venomously at him, Freddie just barely able to see its icy blue stare in John’s wide eyes. He saw nothing: no joy, no excitement, no anger, just the primal, frenzied light of a monster that was ready to dig its teeth into some part of John’s body. It growled, sending flecks of its infected saliva towards John’s face, Freddie panicking inside of the creature as it continued its attempts over and over again, trying harder and harder each time to break through the door. Even when he was sure it was starting to tire of this quest, it kept up. All the pain in its body, the blood dribbling down its arm from cutting itself on a stray piece of wood, nothing kept it at bay. Not until the sky started to glow a brilliant gold from the rising sun.

Its head whipped around at the first ray of sunlight that hit the room. Outside sat the clear sky; the east held the sun, glimmering in all its golden glory while off to the west sat the moon, casting its silvery glow for a few more moments before it would vanish until night returned.

Once its eyes laid on the sun, the pain returned to its body, its whimpers and loud cries of pain reverberating off the room as his body shrunk back down to its original size, the fur, teeth, claws, and ears all receded back into his body. With one last snap of his spine back into its normal alignment, Freddie collapsed onto the cold ground, immediately clutching his bleeding arm as all those emotions from the past hours resurfaced and grew to the point that brought him to tears.

He curled up, trying to hide as much of his body from sight as he sobbed into his folded arms, ignoring the pain in his right. Across the room came the sound of a door opening, Freddie venturing a quick glance towards John, who still had that little bag from the Owlery hanging on his shoulder. John said nothing and just sat down next to him, Freddie not daring to look him in the eye after all he had to witness from last night. Yet John still prodded at his arm until he looked up at him again. In John’s outstretched hand sat a little muffin stuffed with blueberries, in his other hand sat a bundle of bandages and some cream of some sort, and a stack of folded clothes-which he presumed were his-sat behind John. John just offered a kind smile as he took the muffin, slowly starting to work on the injury upon his arm as he ate the pastry. After getting dressed, both sat in silence, John offering him a massive sweet from his bag, to which Freddie split it in half. The two ate their halves, Freddie feeling a peaceful warmth spread throughout him just as the sunlight took over the final rays of moonlight.

#Fanfiction #Moonlight Magic #Frian

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bubblyani · 5 years

Text

Deeper Relations : 01

(Freddie Jackson x Reader)

A Freddie Jackson Multi Chapter Series

Chapter 01: The Return

Requested by: @97freaknik. Thank you for your detailed request 😘

Author’s Note: Possibly the most challenging request I’ve gotten. Can’t wait to explore this. Enjoy!

Holding the old photographs, your fingers gingerly traced over the figures. It had been quite a while since you looked at those, and suddenly you wanted to.

For it was a reminder, a reminder that time had never really passed.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

(One day earlier)

“What on earth?”You muttered under your breath.

A crowd in front of your house never was a surprise for you. Therefore, an empty house certainly raised many questions.

Fortunately, when you found a scribbled note by the door, you doubts vanished immediately. And you knew where to go.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The further you walked towards the flat building, the clearer it all was. The men and the few women gathered outside, they seemed to be familiar with you. Yet you didn’t know why they were there.

“Y/N! How are ya, lass?”

“Blimey! Y/N..Long time no see!”

Smiling at them with uncertainty, you entered the building. And you could tell it was quite hectic inside.

“Ah! There you are...”

Lena Summers, your mother cried out upon seeing you enter through the door. Suddenly, she shoved a bowl of potato crisps into your hands, “...put this on the table will you, love”, She said, as she disappeared into the kitchen.

“Sure...” you said confusingly, looking around the living room. Decorated elaborately, it had the atmosphere of a party about to start, “Mum...what’s going on?” You cried out.

“He’s coming! Freddie’s out!”

You froze.

Jackie Jackson’s excited voice emerged from her bedroom. You followed the voice, entering the room to find Jackie and Maggie, your two sisters there. With her blonde hair clipped with huge curlers, your eldest sister Jackie sat in front of her dressing table, putting on her makeup while your other sister Maggie, helped put on the last curler into the hair.

“Really?” You asked, with genuine curiosity and a dropped jaw, “He is?” Jackie shot you a dirty look. “You look surprised” she said smugly, “Why? Didn’t Mum tell you?” She added while putting on lipstick.

“I’m sure Mum had her reasons” Maggie said kindly, looking at you.

“Yeah...forgetting more like...” you said, munching on a crisp from the bowl while you stood watching them. Your expression was nonchalant, yet you were bothered with this new, lingering feeling.

“How was your lecture today?” Maggie asked, taking the bowl off your hands, as she accompanied you back to the living room. “Alright...” you answered coolly, casually adjusting the ribbons of Jackie’s daughters ponytails as they walked past you, “...hopefully it’ll get interesting soon”

“Well keep at it...” your sister insisted, “...your degree...it’s going to take you places”.

“Thanks Mags...” you looked at her affectionately.

Catching the glimpse of Freddie’s parents entering the flat, you were finally unable to avoid that lingering feeling, “Wow...Freddie’s really coming home. After a long time hmm?” You said.

Before more could be discussed, you heard Jackie’s excited squeal, signaling the return of the man of the hour.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

You were a mere player in the background. You kept your cool as the whole spectacle unveiled before you downstairs. You watched from the balcony as the excited Jackie leaped in Freddie Jackson’s arms as he arrived with Jimmy, his cousin and Maggie’s boyfriend.

Reunions were unveiled in all forms, with parents and their children, with friends and colleagues. You watched it all until it Freddie finally caught the sight of you. It took him a mere few seconds to identify you.

“Y/N??” He asked, to which you nodded excitedly, “Fuck me! You’re all grown up, innit?” He cried out as you went in for a hug.

“Yeah...I suppose” you chuckled into his shirt as he hugged you back, only to have him swooped away by his mates.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Being the youngest Summers sister, you were always left to take care of your nieces while the others tend to their matters. It annoyed you, but because you loved your nieces so much, it was more than tolerable.

Besides, Jackie was on cloud nine after reuniting with her husband. And you were happy to give her some personal time off.

You watched the party escalate and improve with every minute. Everyone indulged in their dancing and alcohol.

You however, had to keep a clear head on account of the babysitting. Therefore, cups of fruit punch resulted in you heading over to the loo in a hurry.

But curses left your lips as you found the toilet occupied already. “Sorry dear...will be right out”

An old voice echoed through the door. You sighed. Pressing your thighs together, you tried your best to control your bladder from bursting.

“Oi! What you doing ‘ere?”

Thighs suddenly loosened the moment you heard Freddie’s voice from the corner. With a cigarette stuck between his fingers, the newly released man walked over to you.

“Gotta piss...”you said coolly “but occupied” you added, pointing at the locked door. You had never spoken this way in front of him before, so your own reaction surprised you. And it seemed like he was too.

“Bloody hell...” he laughed, “Waiting’s quite a pisser...” he said, taking a puff.

You watched him with fascination. He had barely changed since the last time you saw him. And after all these years, you still could not believe he was back.

“Can I try?”

Taking the cigarette out of his mouth, Freddie raised his eyebrows upon hearing your request.

“ What?” He said , “You’ve never tried it before?” He asked with disbelief.

You shrugged off your denim jacket clad shoulders, “Never really felt like it” you said.

“And now you suddenly want to?” He asked, looking into your eyes with seriousness. Looking back, you nodded.

“...yeah...I do”

Within seconds, the seriousness quickly left Freddie, leading him to chuckle.

“Alright! Go on then...” he said, extending his hand to offer you his cigarette.

Taking it delicately from his jeweled fingers, you held it like a joint, slowly placing it between your lips slowly inhaling it. You may have looked cool, but your actions were impulsive enough you forgot the horrible result that followed right after, forcing you to cough out the horrible smoke.

Laughing out loud, Freddie was in hysterics.

“Sure you’re all grown up, cupcake?”

He asked, taking the cigarette from you. Cupcake, the nickname he had given you a while back. You were genuinely surprised he remembered it still.

“Why? Don’t I look it?” Laughing back, You asked him, pointed at yourself for him to look.

“Yeah...you do” looking up and down, Freddie agreed, his eyes darkening while his voice grew soft, “You look good, you know” he said, with a mischievous smile. A smile that you haven’t seen in ages, and what you had missed.

“Thanks Freddie” you said, smiling back, “It’s good to have you back”

The view looked more different now that you were taller, now that your eye-line was in level with his. And with his gaze transfixed on you, you swore the feeling you suddenly got in your stomach felt different too.

You jumped, the moment the door of the toilet burst open, revealing one of your aunts coming out of it, finally.

“Ah!!! Go on, Cupcake...” Freddie urged you, his tone changing into a comical one once again “Imma go take a piss somewhere”

Nodding with a giggle, you quickly proceeded to relieve yourself of the bladder needs that suddenly reappeared the moment he left.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

(Present)

“Y/N! Where are you?”

“IN MY ROOM, MUM!”

You annoyingly yelled out loud enough for your mother to hear through the door.

Pulling out the old hat box from your cupboard, you flopped on the floor to sit with your legs crossed.

Yesterday was quite eventful. Though you were barely involved, with Freddie’s return, you could not help but make some rediscoveries of your very own. Rediscoveries that came in the form of old photographs that resided in that old hat box.

Holding the old photographs, your fingers gingerly traced over the figures. It had been quite a while since you looked at those, and suddenly you wanted to. For he made you do so.

You were simply a child when Freddie Jackson came into your life. He was Jackie’s boyfriend. But being the naive child you were, you went ahead, permitting yourself to fall for him in your innocent childish ways.

He was funny, he was entertaining, he was protective of his girlfriend’s little sister. The little girl who gobbled enough cupcakes one night, it became her nickname.

And thus, your pure heart loved and adored him. But that heart was torn into shreds the moment your young ears heard were married, forcing you to cry your eyes out for days in secret.

Chuckling softly, you covered your mouth with embarrassment by the mere recollection of it. Oh! How truly naive you were back then? How blind can the innocent heart be?

Of course he wouldn’t have considered you back then anyways. Age-wise, you were a mere child. And with someone as beautiful as Jackie to be compared with, you’d be a sore loser with your appearance. Your immaturity would have thrown you under the bus in an instant and you had nothing close enough to call curves.

Until now, you thought.

Locking the door, impulsive became you as you began to unbutton, unzip and unhook all forms of clothing off you, until you stood in front of the mirror, completely naked.

Running your fingers over the supple form that was your body, it was clear you were not a child anymore. A woman you were already, eighteen, feminine and matured, with curves blessed at the right places.

He would have changed his mind if it were now, you suddenly thought with vanity. Though you felt a sense of personal victory over it, you were also reminded of the pain longing for him had brought you. Yes, it was petty. Yet the heartbreak was still real. An unrequited love that made you cry.

You did not want that again. You had made sure of that all these years afterwards, to never feel the way losing Freddie made you feel.

But then again, after all this time, why did the thought of Freddie give you goosebumps? Why did the image of him make your body tingle further down?

“You look good, you know”

Why did his compliment give you a feeling of validation you had never felt before in your life, ever?

——————————————————

Chapter 2 HERE

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