#front soup.txt

[orange-orchard-system]

A small PSA to all those new to dealing with the porn bots that Tumblr now has a fresh wave of – I understand that when you go to report them, you want to report them as "[containing] sexually explicit material", but don't do that. Report them as spam instead.

These are spam bots flooding tags and the website in general with spam links. They often do not have anything sexually explicit on their blog (although they often have implicit material). Plus, these two reports get very different results. Reporting explicit material gets the bot slapped behind an 18+ wall, so minors can't check if they're a bot or not. Reporting spam gets the bot taken down.

Remember, folks: when dealing with a bot, report spam, not smut!

[paracosmic-gt]

I’m on the opposite side of the side dysphoria thing, but I guess for me I just sit down in bed and think really hard about the tactile feelings of things? Imagining the feeling of complex metal as I pick up a car, or the feeling of stone-like concrete as I lean against a building, or how entire trees are more like sturdy sticks I can tear from the ground… I imagine a tiny equivalent can work too?

We might have to get back into practicing visualisation. We used to do it more often, and then for a while it was okay. But it's not really okay for all of us.

Thank you Kasey for coming in clutch. If you have access to your own money, miniatures are cheap on Amazon. As are small DIY house scenes that I am extremely jealous of (and want to live inside). Seto finds practicing handling something very small delicately to help him feel larger. I assume it mimics being gentle to tinies.

On our side there's the giant airpods that someone really wanted to just curl around and pretend the other half is with a giant.

Thank you for responding though...it means a lot ❤️

[the-acid-system]

Being frontstuck is enjoyable when you actually want to be in the front - Arrow

[wormbastard]

bastard

[orange-orchard-system]

This is a random tip, but if you want a deeper voice but are having trouble with consistently keeping it low when you're speaking, check that you aren't subconsciously tensing your throat. This especially goes for those who have trouble speaking (such as semi-verbal folk) who may have learned to ignore the amount of effort they put into speaking.

This is a little complicated, so I'm going to heavily simplify things, but. The pitch of your voice depends on your vocal cords, which are located in your throat. Tensing your throat also causes those vocal cords to tense up, which means your voice comes out higher. Relaxing your throat does the opposite, which makes your voice come out deeper. You don't need to teach yourself to keep your voice low, you just need to teach yourself to keep your throat relaxed, and your body will naturally lower your voice. (And if you want a higher voice, just switch it around and tense up your throat!) It can take a while to get used to, and may even feel like you're straining your voice at first, but rest assured, it's merely due to your body being unused to the practice, just like all other vocal practices beyond what a person typically does. Just don't purposefully strain your voice/hurt your throat by trying to force anything; voice training such as this can be uncomfortable at first, as it is unfamiliar, but it shouldn't become a source of pain. Remember to drink water frequently when first making this a habit to help your throat adjust, and you should be fine.

This has been random voice tips from *checks credentials* some random plural who takes voice lessons. Hope this helps someone out there.

[orange-orchard-system]

I like when I'm scrolling through the notes of a random post and I see some random blog with something like -system or -collective at their end of their URL. Or they just mention something about their system. It's just really nice to see other plurals and systems out and about in the wild (or as wild as you can get on Tumblr)! Like, hello!! I recognize we have this in common; hello!! Same hat!!

[orange-orchard-system]

For all the "go to therapy" and "mental health matters" mantras I see on here, it doesn't seem like a lot of people know what treatment, recovery, and accomodations actually look like

Yeah, someone learning to manage their DID is probably going to report more internal communication and voluntary and purposeful switches. They're breaking down the dissociative barriers that prevented those things. It's a sign of recovery, not a sign of faking.

Yeah, someone in treatment for trauma might end up no longer having triggers that they previously told you they had. When you're learning to process and move on from your trauma, the things that remind you of that trauma may not affect you as badly as they did before. It's a sign of recovery, not a sign of faking.

Yeah, someone with schizophrenia may leave a psychiatrist's appointment still believing in the delusion they held walking in. It's hard to shake off delusions, and a psychiatrist can't "make a patient snap out of it" just because they have a medical license. It's an average experience for a disorder like this.

Yeah, someone may have specific symptoms or accommodations without having a diagnosis for a disorder commonly associated with those specific things. Disorders aren't all-or-nothing; you can have some symptoms without having enough for a diagnosis, and sometimes people just need specific accommodations and don't want, need, or can get a diagnosis for an entire disorder. It happens sometimes.

These are just a handful of examples. Don't assume that just because you know the basics of a mental health problem that you know what living with it – or being in treatment for it, or recovering from it – is like.

[orange-orchard-system]

Sometimes I wonder what life was like for plurals of the past. By that I mean – we know of the history of asylums and social outcasting of anyone who did not fit mental or behavioral norms of the past, yes (trends that have continued, although less common and in new forms, into the modern day), maybe even sometimes of those whose plurality was/is part of their culture (so important, and yet so rarely am I able to learn about them), but what of those who flew under the radar? Those who did not know of their own plurality, or perhaps knew, but kept it secret?

How many philosophers and scientists came up with their ideas by conversing with their headmates?

What of the authors who thought speaking directly to your characters on how their story goes was a universal writing experience?

Did any plural leaders who sought the guidance of their council assume that all the advice given to them was decided upon through an internal meeting of selves, just like how they made decisions?

Were there artists who couldn't find the words to explain their drawings were of their headmates? Storytellers who told tales from their exomemories? Record keepers, secretaries, and scribes who were so good at their jobs because they had practice from having to leave records for themselves?

When and where were the plurals like us?

I see hints of potential plurals of history, sometimes – typically in discussions of the self made by poets or philosophers. And there are a few cases that stand out as evidence that we have always been here. But plurality is so often a personal experience, with any observable behavior often brushed over, shunted away from others' knowledge, or just lost in records muddled by how difficult they are to find, that it's hard to make any theories or guesses about the plurals who might have been. Especially with how we're still barely known to most people; there would have been even fewer opportunities for these plurals of the past to find themselves and words for who they are.

It's... something I think about, when I'm looking at studies or learning about history.

Did plural gentleman living in England during the Victorian era get an unexplained thrill whenever they wrote of themselves in the third person for letters, per proper etiquette? Would they have any idea why referring to themselves in the third person felt right, the same way it can feel right for systems referring to themselves by their bodily name today?

Well. How should I know?

But I hope plurals of the past were able to have moments of plural joy, too.

[orange-orchard-system]

One thing I find really annoying when I'm trying to explain my memory issues to someone is that they always, always underestimate how bad they are, no matter how I try to explain the severity of them. People hear "I have a bad memory" as you forgetting small details, maybe that you "don't care enough to remember", and "I have amnesia" as you joking or exaggerating, because they expect amnesia to be a total, one-time wipe of all memories.

My memory problems aren't that. They're more like...

Accidentally leading people to think I haven't eaten because I can't remember whether I have or haven't, and they assume that I would remember if I had.

Forgetting to do something I promised I would for someone else; feeling like a bad friend for it at best and getting scolded and punished for it at worst.

Going on autopilot because I don't remember what I was in the middle of and if I break whatever flow I'm in, I won't be able to continue.

Someone shows me something meant to give me nostalgia, but I can't feel nostalgia for a time I can't remember, so I just end up listening to them talk about their own nostalgic feelings, suddenly aware that I cannot share in what is a unifying experience for many others.

I'm given an assignment that asks me to write about a time in my life that relates to the provided prompt or topic. Outside of the past few hours, I can only recall the memories of three times in my life, so my assignment has less to do with the prompt and more to do with trying to make a memory I only half remember seem on-topic.

So much of how people define themselves is by their pasts, but I can't access mine, so I learn to define myself by hypotheticals. How I would feel if x happened, if I would prefer y or z – an imitation of the depth others have gained over lifetimes.

Being approached by someone who apparently knows me, and having no idea what kind of relationship we had.

Having a breakdown in a bathroom because I don't know where I am or what's going on.

People telling me the same story multiple times because I didn't remember hearing it before until they were already well into the story.

My amnesia is everywhere, if I care to look for it. And it's something I've come to accept, but... I wish others could understand it better, and didn't assume I was exaggerating (or whatever they think is going on) whenever I talk about it

[orange-orchard-system]

On the one hand amnesia sucks like 97% of the time but on the other hand I gotta admit that it's pretty nice to be surprised by things like candy bars we bought recently or chores having been done already. Sometimes amnesia gives us some pumpkins for our enclosure. Or at least a new chew toy

[orange-orchard-system]

Shout-out to all those who really do need to keep track of system stuff to be able to manage and stay healthy (as a system or in general). A lot of plural advice posts I see advocate for letting go of the pressure for always knowing who's in front, or when you switch, or whatever – which, for the record, is good advice... for the systems who feel pressured and are stressing themselves out over figuring out every little thing. But for some of us, it's not pressure – it's how we manage our conditions.

Our system needs to know how many headmates are fronting at any given time so we can correctly identify and manage the issues that come with too few or too many in front. We also try to keep track of who we are and who's fronting, as letting ourselves drift without identity for too long typically ends up hurting more than helping. It's not wrong to need to keep track of such things in order to function – it's just one way of taking care of your mental health. You're not setting yourself back if this is how you take care of yourself.

Everyone's recovery, methods of self-care, and ways that they manage life in general will vary from person to person (or system to system). It's alright if you need some organizational structure to do what's best for you

[orange-orchard-system]

One of my more minor gripes about the "serial killer alter" trope is that I think there is opportunity for genuine, well-made stories about a system that kills. You could potentially write some really interesting stories involving internal conflict over murder in a system – for instance, if a system killed once in self-defense, and one of the headmates is keeping that memory from the rest of them. Or if an alter came back from dormancy to find out the world's gone to shit and everyone knows "them" as the one willing to kill to protect their group of survivors. Hell, fuck it, have some kind of "no, I'm being literal when I say the version of me that you knew isn't present anymore, this isn't some metaphor for how I've become ~evil~" conflict! So long as it's done in a way that gives the system in question nuance and reason for their actions, I'd be willing to see where the story is going with this!

But nooooooo, it's all stock-standard "this one alter kills others for no good reason" shit with a dash of "don't look too long into the implications that this plural superhero/anti-hero just killed a bunch of people, just accept that they do this" hand-waving that makes people think we're going to stab them if they look away for too long. It's always "this imposter is pretending to be our loved one for nefarious reasons" angst and never "oh shit we treated this alter like shit for just being different than the host" angst. There's not even any originality smh smh. We've already gotten a thousand of these horror plots that use plurality as a one-size-fits-all villain cap; I'm sure horror, whump, and angst writers can do better if they really want to write about a system that kills others

[orange-orchard-system]

We mentioned this a while back as part of a larger post, but it bears repeating on its own – it is in fact common for systems to experience a burst of new system members shortly after syscovery. If this happens/ed to you, it's not a sign that you were wrong about your plurality – it's just something that happens.

Why does it happen? Could be any number of reasons, really. Maybe you've been stressed about this whole process, and that's caused some new folks to pop up to deal with it. Maybe they're old members coming out of dormancy. Maybe it's psychological, and your brain is responding to the change in dissociative barriers and how your system works. Maybe it's spiritual, and all you really needed was a foot in the door for the gate to open, like folktales that say just knowing about other entities can draw their attention to you. Maybe you get new members really easily, and this is just the first time you've knowingly experienced a burst. Whatever the reason, the effect is the same – a sharp increase in number of system members just as you're figuring things out.

It can be off-putting! Frightening, even! But as I said earlier, it's not an automatic sign that you're wrong about being a system. You'll find plenty of other systems who have gone through similar when they were first discovering their systems. Take a breath, take things one step at a time, and trust that things will work out if you just keep working at it. That's how most things work out.

[orange-orchard-system]

I want plurality to become so well-known and accepted that having a period of questioning if you're a system or a singlet is considered a normal thing to go through

[orange-orchard-system]

Been thinking for a while about what one of our singlet friends said about not really getting what it's like to have DID or be a system. And while I get it, it's just something that stuck in my mind because... I don't really know what it's like to not be a system. I haven't had that experience. For as long as I can remember, I've been more-than-one. And so it's interesting to think of my life as something that others struggle to fully understand.

Again, I get it. It's very hard for me to put certain experiences into words or even art, and I've been in the position of a "singlet" (a plural egg, really, but at the time I didn't have any awareness of that that would help me understand) trying and failing to understand system things. I've been there. I know how hard it is to get something like this, and I know how hard it is to describe something like this. I get it.

But at the same time, I don't think it's an impassable mountain. I think of that post going around Tumblr that easily and clearly explains calculus, of all complicated things, and I think "Is plurality really so impossible to explain when this can be done? Difficult, yes, but impossible?" and I don't really think it is. Sometimes, things will have to be simplified – which is a large hurdle I find people encountering, trying to simplify something enough to make sense but not enough that it loses all its meaning – but I think it's a bridge we can build.

Do I know how? Sort of. I don't have a foolproof plan, but I like to bring up and explain plurality to the people in my life. I told a professor about plurality and am writing to her to explain it more in-depth. I gave a speech on dissociation and highlighted dissociative disorders as something I recommended the audience learn about. I wear plural merch and answer people's questions on it. I think just making the attempt, even if you have to simplify things, goes a long way in the long run.

Every time I try to add more to this post it devolves into poetry that only vaguely makes sense, so I'll end the post here. Moral of the story is uhhhh differences in experiences aren't walls between us, we can always work for a better future together. May you have the strength and courage to help both others and yourself

[orange-orchard-system]

When dealing with casual disableism and misuse of serious terms I like to employ a technique I call Hate Mail Does Not Exist. The name comes from when I was first writing fanfiction and didn't realize people were leaving hate comments so I would casually respond to the haters as I would any other commenter

It goes like this: you take whatever they say as if it's completely serious. As if they said and meant whatever it was with complete understanding and kindness of the disability, disorder, or condition they were mocking. You act as though you're both on the same page of supporting whoever/whatever they were insulting, and give them blank stares and non-comprehending responses whenever they try to twist the conversation back towards cruelty. Your goal here is to be the everyday, mild-mannered, and polite neighbor from down the hall, who doesn't know all of what's going on but never passes up an opportunity to be kind, and thus impress upon them that they are the ones acting out of line here. They are the ones going out of their way to be unreasonable and rude. These people often don't even realize the impact of their "jokes", so it's on you to act as though they're not jokes at all, and make them realize just how serious these things can be.

They call someone psychotic as an insult? You ask if they have any delusions you should be aware of so you can avoid accidentally making them worse. They describe an activity or place as "so lame"? You react with mild confusion as to how an activity or place could have a mobility disability. They laugh at someone's facial difference? You give them a blank look and absolutely no indication that there is anything worth pointing out about that person's appearance as you ask what they find funny.

The best usage of this technique comes from relating their disableism to someone you know. Don't drop names, don't give out information that could identify this person – hell, make up a person if you want. But people get real uncomfortable if they try to insult someone by calling them disabled/disordered and you respond by telling them that someone you know and care about has that disability/disorder. Gives them a real "oh shit I've been trash talking actual people" moment.

Doesn't work on all folks. Sometimes, they'll turn the disableism on you and your "apparent stupidity". But it often works for me with the folks that have just not put that much thought into the meaning behind what they say.