#god its so sad bc its like none of the characters have a way out everything is so deeply rooted that it’s impossible to even understand

[angelwhisp3rs]

∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐒 obsession

Pairing: ID!Leon x Fem!Reader

Summary: Training the rookies was a pain until he met her. His sweetest new obsession, he wouln't stop till he was buried deep inside her.

Tags: smut, fluff, age gap (not too much! i imagined leon being 37 and the reader being 23-25, so everyone is legal and consenting! Its not his age in ID but i use it only bc of the character background), p in v, eating out, riding, breeding kink, leon is obsessed!, a small housewife kink.

↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺ on repeat: exo - obsession

Notes: Got too excited and posted without proofreading it! If i missed anything, please let me know so i can correct it! Also, when will tumblr make a pastel pink theme for the dashboard? I hate that everything we have is either a sad/gloomy hipster or raging gothic theme.

From all his years working at the D.S.O, Leon was stressed pretty much all the time, never catching a break, too exhausted. That showed on the increasing wrinkles forming from his frowns, and the occasional white hair that appeared on top of his head. In his non-existent breaks, he had another thing on his belt: training the new agents.

At first, it was a pain in the ass, watching those morons do the same mistake over and over, it really made Leon think it was getting too easy to be a D.S.O agent. Some repeated the same mistakes over and over again, and because of it, Leon frequently lost his patience, soon getting known as a hardass. 

As time went by, he began losing hope for the future of the department, until she came through. Pretty body, voice as soothing as a canary and delicious lips that called for him. And the best thing was that she was better than all of these morons, throwing down even the experienced rookies.

Since Ada, Leon didn’t know what it was like to be this obsessed with a woman. He wanted to know her next step, have her by his side all the time, know how her soft skin feels underneath his rough fingertips. He dreamed of her, and caught himself checking her out more than he should. Chris always teased him in private, telling him “his star student is making him turn back to his twenties”. God, they had a small age gap, but thinking about it only made his cock throb. Maybe dealing with rookies made his mind turn him back to his twenties.

'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•'︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•'

As their “graduation” got closer in time, all the new agents began training more, but none were like her. She came in first and left after all of them, always using the training gym by herself the most she could. Taking advantage of the opportunity, Leon offered private training, becoming a private tutor to her.

Instead of making things easy, it just caused him to become even more addicted to her - he now knew her thoughts, her quirks and her perspectives. As they spent more and more time together, it was clear that she found him attractive too - he knew he was still successful with women, after all (even if he was more dumped than anything). Leon had cemented in his mind that he needed her, and now he just needed to find a way to approach her.

She will be all his.

'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•'︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•'

One of the nights, he had to spend in his office reading and filing boring documents, Leon heard a gentle knock on his door. “Come  in” he simply answered, and to his surprise - and excitement, it was his little star. She entered his office, and her usual sparkly eyes were dull, the poor thing was too tired, working herself too much.

“What happened, rookie? You look exhausted. Working too much to bring me down?” Leon said with a smirk

“Ha, you wish, sir.” Oh, how that term made his pants tighten. “I just came for help, I don’t know. I’ve been focusing on sharpening my skills for the admission test, but I don’t know…” she said unsure

“Hey, don’t tell the rest, but you’re the only one that I would bet on getting in” he reassured her, standing up and taking a seat beside her in his couch “You’re too much in your head, agent”

“I know, I just can’t turn it off…” she whined, making Leon think how she would sound if he made her cum around his cock 

That 's it. That was Leon’s chance to get his favorite student. He put a hand on her thigh, not too close to her precious cunt and said quietly to her “It’s alright, sweetheart… I can help you, if you want”

She knew where this was going, and it turned her on more than she thought. Feigning innocence, she pulled a strand of her hair behind her ear, nodding “But… How, sir?” and looked at his lips

Leon smiled, caressing her jaw “let me fill your mind, rookie. Why don’t you sit at my desk, hm?” 

She stood up and slowly went to his desk, sitting on it and letting her head fall to the side, as if to question him “what’s next?” with her body language. Leon follows her, standing between her legs and letting his hands caress the outer side of her thighs. His face lowers to her neck, his kisses and his stubble causing a warm sensation to run through her skin. A soft gasp left her lips, her hands caressing the back of his head.

Feeling him smirk against her skin, he kept placing slow and gentle kisses, adding some nibbles on the mix “That’s what my best student needs, right? A real man to touch her”

He lays her on his desk, pushing his papers aside, pulling her hips into his - his cock adding a nice weight to her sensitive wetness. He slowly pushed her shirt up, watching her beauty for a moment “You’re perfect, baby”. As he whispered the praise, her cheeks blushed more, a soft giggle leaving her lips. He finally kissed her lips and both were hungry for each other, to quench the thirst they had been accumulating after months. 

Leon swiftly undoes her bra, not wasting any time and circling his tongue around her nipples, sucking and lightly nibbling it. Underneath him, her breath quickens, as she whines freely as he teased her. Trying to ease their ache, Leon grinds their centers together, his cock so hard that his zipper presses against his member.

Soon, he removed her pants, kissing as her skin showed - inch by inch. Again, his stubble creates goosebumps in her legs, as he worshiped her body - she deserved it, after all, he wanted to make her addicted to him and his taste. Watching her panties so drenched as they were glued to her pussy, he couldn't help but nuzzle into her bundle of nerves, causing a gentle jump on her. He kissed and licked the wet spot, as if trying to eat her up. 

“F-fuck, please take them off, sir” she whined, not even realizing that she kept the term. Leon, deciding that he wasn’t in a teasing mood, guided the clothing down, letting his pretty star all spread on his desk - his to take, to tease, to fuck, to breed. 

“Shit, baby girl, you are so wet for your teacher… you wanted me to take you, right? You wanted me to go crazy and drench my face with you. huh?” He teased her as he got on his knees, aligning his face against her cunt. She was so red, puffy and wet, not even the most delicious candy could compare to her.

His tongue tasted her at first with kitten licks, causing a loud moan to rip from her mouth. “Keep quiet, sweetheart. We don’t want anyone coming here and seeing you spread out like a needy slut, right?” at his comment, and as if teasing her, he finally sucked and rolled his tongue around her clit, letting his index finger circle her wet entrance. Almost as if she was distressed, she cupped her mouth with her hand, rolling her eyes back at the pleasure. 

Pushing his finger forward, slowly, until he's entirely inside her, he kept eating her out with gusto, as if he was a starved man. Soon, what was one finger turned into two, her juices were flowing through his palm as he began to be more desperate for her - but he wouldn’t stop till she let him taste her entirely. “It feels good, doesn’t it, my doll? I’m the only man and only one for you, gonna make sure to keep this pussy satisfied till I die”.

His fingers and mouth worked more ferociously, pussy drunk wasn’t even close to describe how he was feeling.On the other end, she had tears in her eyes as one hand didn’t leave her mouth as the other one tugged his hair hard, making him moan against her drenched cunt. “S-sir, o-oh g-god…need to c-cum!” she pleased, looking down at him with glazed eyes.

“Do it, baby girl, give it to me” he ushered her, maintaining the pace till she finally coated his fingers, tongue and mouth with her essence. As her ‘little death’ came, she felt as if fireworks erupted inside her mind - none of her exams daring to creep up on her mind.

He praised and marked her thighs as she came down from her high. The girl pulled Leon into a passionate kiss, smiling in contentment, reaching cloud 9000. Pulling away, she whispered against his lips “Let me repay you, Leon. Wanna make you feel just as good”

“Not today, doll.” He whispered, sitting back in his chair and pulling his pants and underwear down, patting his lap “I know how to help you even further”, he said with a wicked glint in his eyes.

Like an excited bunny, she hopped off his desk and jumped into his lap, resuming her kisses on his mouth - casually descending into his jaw and neck, enjoying the pleased hums that he lets out. He palmed her ass and firmly grabbed it, giving some gentle smacks as she had his fun with him. To Leon, in all of his life, that was his happiest moment: having his pretty princess on his lap, all naked, hypnotized in kissing and feeling him up. 

“Go ahead, baby, let me finally empty your mind and use you” he calmly ordered her, caressing her cheeks adoringly. Soon, she positioned herself and slowly sat down on his cock, rolling her eyes back and holding into his chair behind him. 

“S-so b-big…” she moaned, her head falling into his shoulders as the girl swallowed all of him. She was so tight, wet and perfect, Leon almost came deep in her cunt just by her inserting him. His head got dizzy for a moment, his hold on her ass tightening, as he grunted and pressed his eyes closed. 

Dedicatedly, she began jumping up and down on his cock, their skin slapping as the woman looked directly into his eyes. If anyone saw them at that moment, they would attest that both had heart in their eyes. her tits jumped up and down in front of him, making his tongue and fingers play with them as the couple lost their minds in pleasure.

“Good job, doll… jumping on my cock like the good girl you are… it’s all for you, always for you” he said rambling in pleasure,  busying his mouth to tell her praises and roll her sensitive nipples on his tongue, as her cunt drenched his cock, causing a white ring at the base.

Holding tightly into the back of his chair, her hips worked even faster on him, making Leon moan more frequently in pleasure, slapping her ass, leaving behind his handprints on her pretty skin. His head falls back as he watches the goddess in front of him taking what's hers and milking his cock into her hungry pussy. He would make sure that she passed her admission check, so every end of shift he would breed her cunt, till she is finally all of his - the mother of his children, his pretty wife. But that’s a talk for later.

After some minutes pass, Leon takes over and thrusts from below, making her body turn into his own ragdoll, her moans flowing freely into his mouth. Some minutes passed, and both were on the brink of their orgasm, so close to reaching their true paradise “Will you let me fill you, doll? Make your womb so full of me, gonna make you get home with me drenching on your legs” he taunted her.

Not handling much more teasing, and his words serving as a catalyst to her peak, she nods and coats his cock with her sweet arousal, biting down on his shoulder to drown out her sounds. Her roughness and the new tight hold on his cock makes him spill into her gummy walls, emptying himself. Finally, he marked her as his. His doll, his love, his property.

Both were coming down from their highs, trying to control their breathing, letting their heartbeat slow down. He caressed her hair, kissing her cheeks and nuzzling their noses together, all smiles. “So, did I help?” he asked jokingly.

“Didn’t even know why I came here” she answers teasingly.

From now on, Leon would never be exhausted for the wrong reasons ever again.

[iratusmus]

so bizarre to me when people give fiona a redemption arc like making her evil wasnt literally like the fundamental core of making her an actually interesting character. like . ok actually i was mostly planning on just leaving the post as this but im going to make a proper post whining about this because ive seen it far too often for my liking.

it appears to me that a lot of people do this because they dislike fiona/scourge which is like. sure i get it. but you could literally just... break them up . and have her continue being awful on her own. like scourge is not the reason she switched sides and i find the idea. 1) a bit misogynistic frankly but thats more of a personal gripe than anything else like god forbid a woman make bad choices of her own volition and not because a man forced her hand into doing it (YES i am aware that abuse makes this more complicated than that but also we .... already have a relationship in archie sonic that fits this exact bill. yes it wasnt written well but the wonder of fan works is that you can always make it better. so why are we repeating it again 1:1) and 2) demeaning to the point of her character.

like. ok. lets go over the facts real quick. as a kid fiona got put in robotnik's salt mines and got accidentally left behind bc sonic & co couldnt find her. she realized that nobody was going make the effort to go save her, so she dug herself out and started life on the run as a treasure hunter/thief. she didnt ever really accept the fact that sonic and mighty not saving her wasnt really their fault, and even after becoming a freedom fighter, nobody ever said anything or apologized or said "hey wow that kind of sucks you went through all that". she never really made any actual friends within the ff or formed any meaningful bonds. she starts dating sonic, but its pretty clear that the only reason they're dating is that she's his rebound post The Slap. the moment her history with bean & bark came up - after she used that knowledge to save everybody - sally immediately turns on her and sonic is the only person to try to stick up for her. as bark and bean leave, bean also insinuates that fiona isnt really a freedom fighter, and that she's still basically one of them.

fiona is a "bad" trauma survivor. when i say "bad" i mean in opposition to the ideal tumblr trauma survivor - the sad poor uwu bean whose trauma only inclines them hurt themselves and they become more sympathetic kind etc. as a result. fiona, on the other hand, blames sonic (whose fault this is, frankly, not) for her experiences, and becomes more jaded and mean. she has no real support system and people repeatedly tell her that she hasnt changed and that she wont change and she cant change. shes already got all this baggage by the time her relationship with scourge starts carrying actual weight - he's offering her a way out. if none of them are ever going to really accept her being "good", then she might as well just give into her worst impulses and join hands with scourge, who, notably, has no stake in this - he doesnt have any obligation to be her friend like the freedom fighters, and more than that he likes her specifically because of the part of her that everybody else hates. the important part here is that he encouraged her to switch sides, he didnt make her switch sides.

id say fiona's character in a writing sense is an exploration of the failings of the freedom fighters to support a trauma victim, and how those failings, while unintentional, lead that victim to specifically turn against them. she says "ok actually screw all of you guys" and gives up on trying to be good because nobody ever gave her any real encouragement and decides to put herself on a path of self-destructive revenge and inflicting her misery onto the general population. we can also recall at this point that this motivation is entirely removed from scourge and you can literally break them up and still keep her evil.

the other important point here is that she purposefully chose that path of turning evil as opposed to leaving the freedom fighters or going somewhere else or like literally doing anything else. she literally could have just left but she did not and thats what makes her Interesting. prompted by her unhealed trauma and personal baggage she made those bad choices for herself, and frankly i cannot for the life of me understand why people think that walking back that character development (and yes i mean character development. character development can also mean getting worse) for ..... what. snarky but with a heart of gold generic protagonist girl? come on guys

[crabonfire]

unsure if it’s been done before, or if you’re comfortable with it, but mercs as parents ? :]

the way I gasped when I saw this bcs omg yes!!!! mercs as parents babeyyy B)

Mercs as parents!

characters: all mercs!!

warning: none!! some are a tiny bit sad but still hapy

NOTE!!! sorry this is very...long overdue. when exams came out I just got writers block, I had to focus on exams...thank god they are ending in a couple days GAHSHHDHDHFHF

also some are shorter than others...m very sorry bbg :(

♡Scout♡

• aw

• I don't know this is honestly really cute

• he has some... Doubts. Like any parents do, but seeing the happiness on your face and your child(ren) s face whenever you talk to him? that makes all the worry go away baby.

• such a good dad. he smothers them with love and affection, definitely pretends to be santa claus on Christmas (if you celebrate it) and teaches those kids to be tough.

• DEFINITELY takes them out to play baseball. your kids are baseball fans take it or leave it.

• I really don't have much to say other than the fact he'd be a great dad, I think this will teach him a lot about himself and make him a better person, I love dad scout.

♡Soldier♡

• I feel like he'd be a bit too aggressive on the child(ren) at first, not understanding how fragile they can be until he really sees them.

• he's much more gentle and quiet around them, trying his best not to scare them.

• I think he has some gender role problems to deal with, so talk through it with him.

• but anyways, he's a great dad honestly. he cradles them and plays with them everyday, making sure that they are always happy.

• he may not understand much of a child's need or their limits, and you two may fight about that. But understand that he will definitely learn, give him time, he is trying his best.

• he's not good at comforting, but he's great at pep talks and hyping his kids up!!!

• he teaches them to be brave and strong, telling them stories from when he was in war. Its all fake, but who cares honestly.

• overall decent dad, just needs to change some of his habits.

♡Pyro♡

• WOAHHH

• Super understanding parent.

• I feel like he went through a ton as a child, explaining why he acts childish sometimes, so I think he's be a very understanding parent when it comes to his kids.

• very patient, and fun!!

• I bet for a fact that the kids love him, spoils them a shit ton.

• he loves to draw with them, putting their drawings up in your shared bedroom so he can admire them when he wakes up.

• he's a bit doubtful of his ability to parent, he thinks he's a bit too unprepared. But as long as your here, he's not too worried.

gosh I love pyro

♡Demo♡

• this guy was SO PUMPED when you two decided to have kids

• but oh boy is he anxious.

• he will not drink ever around them.

• he's quite sweet to his kids, calling them lad or lassie, along with cute ass nicknames because he just loves them so much.

• loves to hug them and carry them whenever you go out, piggy back rides, princess carry, whatever it is, he loves it.

• he likes to mess around with them a lot, and probably the type of dad to go with their kids dumb ideas even though they might go horribly wrong or are just stupid.

• he loves his family. does he think he's a bad parent sometimes? Yeah, but every parent does. You just give him a hug and he'll forget all about it.

my man fr!

♡Heavy♡

• i love misha :( my big mercenary man misha:((( I love him sm....

• gosh I'm smiling as I'm typing this ok

• he's the best dad ever.

• he's strict, of course he is. but you've seen this man in the comics, he knows when to let loose.

• he cooks for them everyday, making them school lunches, teaches them Russian, and teaches them to defend themselves if it needed to be done.

• he's also so sweet, and he tells you and his kids he loves them everyday. Heavy is not embarrassed, why should there be a need to be embarrassed? He loves you guys.

• he loves to read them stories before bed, and he loves to give them bear hugs and carry them.

• when the kid(s) saw him, he was scared that the kid(s) would be scared of him. But when they hugged him and gave him a bright smile, he melted into a puddle and chuckled, giving them a forehead kiss.

is the reason I love heavy because my dad left me for 7 years of my life and even as he came back he still didn't give me affection till this very day? maybe. but we'll never truly know.

♡Engie♡

• Hshdhdhjfjfjfj men. I LOVE. MEN.

• ueeuueue....ue...:(...ueue,,,uee!!! ;(((

• so...so sweet. MAN.

• calls them all sorts of nicknames.

• this man has never had any doubt in his life.

• he will kiss, hug, carry, cradle, comfort, just smother them with so so much love.

• makes inventions for them, and if any of them are ever interested in engineering his heart will explode due to happiness.

• he spoils those mfs so much you gotta tell him off sometimes. He's honestly so sweet it hurts.

• he will take so many pictures, and have them on both a physical album, and one he keeps in a camera he made himself. So that incase one is lost, he still has the other.

• I...I don't know man. He's the perfect dad. I genuinely don't know what else to write.

engie..kiss me challenge? UM...sir why do you as a man have cute lips? for me to kiss them? whore

♡Medic♡

• hell nah.

• he probably just wants one kid, he thinks more than one is a mistake LMAOOOO

• he's not very affectionate, not that he doesn't want to be, but he's scared to overwhelm the child.

• overall tho, he's actually quite sweet.

• he'll leave the affection up to you, but of course he will spend time with the kid...its his kid too after all 💀

• he likes to call them nicknames too, and likes to ruffle their hair a lot.

• probably will only bond with their kid over scientific stuff or whatever the kids into, he has to tone down the insanity a bit, but they are sweet together. The kids a bit messed up like he is to be honest, and he finds that endearing.

"Papa look!! I drew an anatomically accurate heart! Do you like it?"

"Oh mein gott, zhis is quite beautiful! The detail... Amazing work mein schatz :) ruffles their hair "

• he doesn't understand or relate to children much, but he tries, he really does. He will spend days trying to find a solution to make your child feel better if they were ever sad. He's a good dad, and he will try to be the best if he can.

aww he's so baby girl

♡Sniper♡

• aw baby girl

• definitely has a lot of doubts, but he's happy.

• like medic, probably just wants one kid.

• if it was a girl he'd definitely call them "daddy's little girl"

• he's always smiling around them, they just make him so happy.

• he's honestly struggling every day, having to ask you for comfort or advice on if he's doing it right. Doing what right you ask? Parenting.

• but just be there with him through it all, he's a great dad just anxious.

• he talks to his kid about how to survive in the wild, showing them his collection of cool yet a bit weird stuff from his past work experiences. Some are a bit...too weird. Remind him to not show the kid the animal eyes he has in a jar from that one time he fought off a radioactive iguana.

• him and the kid get along pretty well, to be honest...he's starting to change his mind about only having one kid.

♡Spy♡

• sobs

• he doesn't want to...at first.

• well,,,he doesn't want to mess up like he did before. How he left scout, left his past behind, he doesn't want to do that to you because of his cowardness.

• but in the end, he loves you, and he loves the child, so he will try his best.

• he's a great father, have you seen him in that one Christmas comic?

• he will smother that child with love and gifts, and will train them to be kind at a young age.

• he's still extremely doubtful of his ability, but just comfort him. he's doing great, he just can't seem to understand that right now.

• but he's sweet, he loves them, and you, and isn't embarrassed to admit it (like misha!!!)

• he's a bit distant from the child at first, but as time goes by it'll all be fine. he doesn't want to hurt his child, not again.

sobs. Great dad, major issues.

done!!!

YAY!! sorry I haven't written in months,,exams.

[a-very-zilly-gooze]

hey gang, it’s way too early AM and i have not been able to sleep all night so let me just explain my senior quote to you all bc i’m really happy with it. the quote is…

“Some things just aren’t meant to make sense, some things aren’t meant to be represented.” -Bears in Trees

why? well, for several reasons.

1. i think it’s neat. get off my back.

2. it’s from one of my favorite songs of all time, I’m Doing Push Ups by @bearsintreesofficial. and as many of you know, i kinda really really really like BiT.

3. i was majorly stressing over choosing a senior quote because i’m a super anxious person, and when i told my friend that I was considering using this one, she said something like “if you end up hating the quote later then it’ll be ironic because some things just aren’t meant to make sense” and that is some god-level reasoning there.

4. Nick (BiT lyricist, guitarist, cryptid?) once said that this lyric was about him trying to make sense of his school experience. To quote Nick himself, “i moved away to go to uni… and had a weird and gross and sad first year. i kept trying to write a song about it… until i eventually realised; some things aren’t meant to make sense. some things aren’t meant to be represented. some events don’t make you a better/worse person and there’s no point trying to think about it or ascribe any sort of ~main character energy~ to them. some things just happen and it sucks.” and i think that that really describes my high school experience. i try to reason out why ~things~ happened to me. i try to place some sort of value on the pain because it fuels the future or some shit. i try to use it to interpret myself or my surroundings. but in the end, some things just happen and it sucks.

5. one of the reasons i was stressing so hard about my senior quote was because i thought it needed to encompass all of me or all of my high school experience. so i really wanted something to show all of me, every crevice of my being, and how i felt about moving on and moving away. i considered the “live forever or die in the attempt” quote from Catch-22 by Joseph Heller. i considered “If you’ve gotta go, then go with style!” from Crowley in Good Omens. i was planning on doing “Ready to head into the unknown?” “Nope. Let’s do it” from Dipper and Mabel in Gravity Falls’s last dialogue sequence. but none of these felt like they encompassed all of me. and so i was freaking out, trying to find something that was me and my feelings. after all, it’s not every day that someone moves ~765 miles away and across the country for college. but i finally realized that i don’t actually know how i feel about moving away. i have so many emotions about it, and they all coexist and wreak havoc within me. my feelings about moving don’t really make sense to me, and this cannot be represented in a single quote. so there’s no way that i can just magic my feelings onto a yearbook (if only i were a wizard :/).

so takeaways: ummm go listen to hot chocolate by bears in trees streaming everywhere AND ITS OKAY TO HAVE CONFUSION!!! THAT IS NORMAL AND HUMAN!!!

[prismatoxic]

i know the original mgs1 graphic novel has been around for almost 20 years. i'm sure it’s been analyzed to death by people smarter than me, with more innate knowledge of the series than i have, but serzh and i watched the digital one (with all the voices and animations), and i've been thinking about it ever since.

mgs1 is my favorite. in comparison to the rest of the series that followed, it's far more subdued; the voice acting is more sincere, the setting is less fantastical, the enemies more human... when things like psycho mantis's manipulation or vulcan raven's ~mystic native powers~ (ugh) come into play, the juxtaposition of those events with the more grounded rest of the narrative makes them feel more severe.

is mgs1 perfect? god, no. maybe raven's portrayal can be somewhat forgiven from a game from 1998, but a lot of the issues it has come down to technical limitations and plot discrepancies, imo. i have a lot of thoughts about how stilted snake and meryl's relationship is, too, but i kind of want to give the game a point for that one since they fell apart after the fact anyway. i just don't know if that was intended from the start. if not, they wrote an unsalted cracker of a relationship story for no real reason, and that's sad.

but my thoughts don’t end there, nor do my thoughts on twin snakes and, later, the graphic novel, which was eventually billed as a way for players to get the story of mgs1 without having to play it. i feel like that framing makes things far more egregious than they already were. regardless, if you’re interested, my thoughts on all this will be under the cut. i’d love to hear other fans’ thoughts, too. fair warning, though: a lot of this will be centered on the dynamic between snake and otacon, and their individual characterizations, bc those things interest me most and also made me the angriest when changed.

so let’s get twin snakes out of the way first. twin snakes is a bastardized version of the story that i love, which somehow manages to mangle the narrative while also changing none of the dialogue. i’ve heard the story of david hayter personally paying all the other returning VAs to get them to come back, but you can tell they don’t really have a lot of passion for re-recording things they already said years ago. david himself, while not so disenfranchised, has fully switched to the later snake portrayals here, and while i do think he’s a very talented VA and the only snake i’ll ever agree with, the direction he was nudged in from then onwards makes snake so... over-the-top, and hammy. it’s embarrassing at times, and in twin snakes it’s at its worst.

then there’s the characterization. ignoring the voices, for a moment, you will also run into situations where the characters’ actions and movements paint a picture of them that contradicts the characterization they had originally. snake is... over-the-top, like his voice, and then you have otacon. i am still mad about otacon. i am so mad about otacon. without changing a single goddamn one of christopher randolph’s lines, they butchered his character, turning him into a joke: he’s constantly falling down in silly slapstick ways, even during the wolf death scene. one of the most powerful scenes in the entire first game, if not THE most powerful one, and they turned it into a fucking JOKE. (and had an actual wolf carry her body away at the end??? what????)

...but this has absolutely been talked about by people smarter than me. here’s an article by the english translator for mgs1 about his work and experience with the game, and here's a video by youtuber jackdonsurfer about the differences between mgs1 and twin snakes, and why twin snakes is a bad remake. i highly recommend both of these, they’re very good.

so moving on from twin snakes, we have... the graphic novel for mgs1, the bastard son of the two games combined with a bunch of its own ideas as well, for better or worse. i’ll be referencing the digital version, but anything that isn’t related to the voice acting will still hold true for my thoughts on the actual book.

the graphic novel uses the same voice direction as twin snakes, but toned down, more befitting the tone of mgs2 or 3, which did seem to learn from that particular mistake. the actors also seem to have regained their passion for the project, and for the most part, give it their all. gray fox is voiced here by rob paulsen, as well, and that’s a decision i understand, same as in twin snakes; greg eagles voiced donald anderson along with gray fox, and the similarities between his anderson and gray fox voices were inescapable once you recognized them. i do think greg eagles did things a lot more passionately, and his version of gray fox is very different from rob paulsen’s, but at the same time, the more mechanical read of gray fox’s lines—up until the tail end of the fight in the lab, or the REX fight, where he gets more intense—does lend an interesting interpretation to his character. so, in the end, while i think i overall prefer greg eagles’ version, i don’t think rob paulsen’s is bad.

so everyone is doing their best, and the writing isn’t as godawful as it was in twin snakes... however, several things jeremy blaustein discussed specifically changing in his english translation of mgs1 in the polygon article i linked are instead lifted from the twin snakes version of the script, or based largely on it. so it’s not great. better, but not as good as it could be.

so with that out of the way, and with me having a subzero interest in talking in depth about the art (it’s really stylized, but there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s perfectly serviceable), it’s time to talk about the story.

there are some things the graphic novel does alright, or even really well. i like the added scenes between FOXHOUND members and other main characters; i like otacon’s justification for wanting his own codename; and i love the psycho mantis section. absolutely fucking flawless concept, wish they’d done that in the game instead of making the controller vibrate. ah well.

the rest, though. god.

i mean, a lot of it is fine, i suppose. slightly more dramatic spins on the original narrative, cutting out parts that only made sense in-game, shifting some events around, and otherwise just sort of doing things the same. but i have some very specific grievances about some of the portrayed relationships.

so, if this post gets out farther than i expect, like some of my other mgs posts have, here’s some background: i’m an otasune shipper. i don’t think that affects my biases too much, as the story and characters are really important to me as-is (in the original, obviously), but i am particularly invested in snake and otacon’s relationship, even in a strictly canon sense. otacon is my favorite mgs character, too. so let’s discuss some of this while also knowing those things about me, for transparency’s sake.

onto the point, i think snake and otacon’s relationship in the original game is massively important to the narrative. the video i linked by jackdonsurfer discusses this, and is one of the reasons i originally started fully considering it, but to be more precise: snake and otacon are very explicitly narrative foils. 

snake is a military veteran, a mercenary, a soldier by birth and by trade. he kills people for a living, and he does it well. he’s gruff and aggressive and with rare exceptions, looks out for himself first and foremost. he’s rough around the edges, sharp, pushing away meaningful connections and never letting anyone get too close.

otacon is a scientist, as well as an anime fanboy, two of the first things we learn about him. we also quickly learn that he’s a pacifist—upon accepting that he’s responsible for a nuclear weapon and not a defensive machine, he immediately vows to fix it, refusing to cause any more deaths than he surely already has. he’s soft and kind and passionate, and he wants to help people, whether it be the whole world or just snake. he wears his emotions on his sleeve, and even when snake is holding him at arm’s length, otacon is trying in earnest to connect with him.

they tend to bounce off of each other like polarized magnets, but in moments like the “love blooming on a battlefield” scene or wolf’s death, they come together, finding common enough ground to understand each other while remaining distinctly different. you can feel snake warming up to otacon before the end, even without taking into account the otacon ending (which is noncanon anyway, but its exploration into their relationship in that situation is still very sweet). otacon is willing to sacrifice himself to ensure snake and meryl’s survival in the canon ending, and snake makes especially sure to request otacon’s extraction when the bombs don’t fall.

this all segues nicely into their dynamic come mgs2, but even taken only by itself, it tells a very concise story. even though they both have romantic interests in mgs1, their relationship with each other is important, a key factor in both of their character arcs.

why am i bringing all of this up? well, uh, because the graphic novel tries to downplay it in favor of the romances.

look, i don’t ship either of the “canon” ships in mgs1 (if we can even call otacon/wolf such), but i don’t think they’re done poorly, either. as i said earlier, i felt like snake and meryl’s stilted, almost forced romance lends well to the timeline between mgs1 and 2, because the idea that she’d eventually realize he was exactly who he said he was—thereby seeing the real him, and not this idea of him she had in her head—and subsequently realize she didn’t want that and wind up leaving, is really good. it’s an interesting story, and adds to the overall narrative. as for wolf and otacon, i always got the sense that otacon was in over his head about someone who’d shown him the barest hint of mercy, and wolf was mostly neutral on him in turn. the moment when she reaches out, and snake asks what she wants, and she says her gun? with otacon visibly in frame behind the gun? that’s powerful. he’s inconsequential, meaningless; yet to him, she’s everything, this symbol of “love blooming on the battlefield”. it’s an interesting story.

the graphic novel giving us more scenes between snake and meryl/otacon and wolf isn’t something i mind, especially the latter. i want to see more of that! i want to know why otacon feels the way he does. the first time he runs into wolf in this story, she wants to kill him. (never mind that she “doesn’t kill for sport” in the game, huh.) the second time, she uh. decides she likes him a lot? i’m willing to accept her being at least somewhat fond of him (he does have her handkerchief, after all), but her sudden pivot to openly liking him is... odd. and then the third time, he bursts onto the snowfield to stop snake and wolf from killing each other (this is good, i like this idea), and she can’t bring herself to shoot him to lure snake like she did with meryl (which feels... not like a problem a trained killer like her would have, especially given that she discusses shooting him in non-vital but crippling ways, specifically). her death scene is similarly impacted by this increased focus on her and otacon, stripping away the mood of the original in ways i really wasn’t fond of. 

now, snake and meryl i have less to actively say about because we genuinely skipped a lot of it. it was painful to watch. i like meryl—i think her being an inexperienced wannabe soldier who is desperate to prove herself is a great story. she idolizes “heroes” like snake, who were never heroes at all, throwing herself into the war machine to live up to this ideal that will never exist. (mgs4 handled this well too.) i guess i don’t have much to say on how the graphic novel handled her because of the skipping, but i can say that there was ample focus on her and snake, and in a way, i feel like parts of otacon and snake’s story were surgically removed to make more space for it.

remember the “love blooming on a battlefield” scene? of course you do. it’s one of the most iconic scenes in the entire game—maybe the whole series. how does the graphic novel handle it? it, uh. doesn’t. it’s gone. 

and at that point, i can’t help but wonder if part of the entire point of this was to make the story seem less gay. maybe that’s just a tinfoil hat thing. but why would you remove one of the most powerful, character-driven conversations in the game? it doesn’t sit right with me. were they worried snake and otacon would eclipse the oh-so-important romances if they were allowed to be proper foils?

some of the stuff towards the ending is pretty good. i like some of gray fox’s changes, and i like snake being forced to fire the stinger because fox begs him to, though the original version where snake can’t bring himself to is still good. i like that snake cuts off liquid’s arm, setting up ocelot’s arc later on. i like that the patriots are mentioned; of course they weren’t originally, bc they hadn’t been conceived of yet, but it’s a good addition now that they’re part of the series. 

i don’t like how otacon is stripped of the chance to demonstrate his conviction and loyalty, because he’s already safely out and hacked the security doors in advance. i don’t like how he mocks snake’s real name instead of making a 2001: a space odyssey joke. i don’t like how him escaping with snake and meryl has made for some very confusing fanfics where writers think he was at the cabin at the same time as meryl because that’s the only version of the story they know.

and that, right there, is the worst part of it all, isn’t it?

this version of events, with all its changes, has been presented multiple times as a stand-in for the actual game. it’s not the only one in this series, but it is the only one i’ve seen, and it veers so wildly from established canon that it actively changes several dynamics and story beats—and people without access to mgs1, or who don’t like the look of it, or can’t quite get into it, or aren’t able to play video games in the first place, are given this story as a way to bypass having to play it at all. it has been presented as being just as good as playing the game to see its story. it’s officially sanctioned konami content.

i genuinely hate it.

i liked a lot of things, like i said. some changes were good. psycho mantis was great. several of the VAs did a stellar job (though there was one part when otacon meets wolf and her dogs where the voice christopher randolph uses for him is exactly huey’s, so much so that it makes a genuine statement sound manipulative with that context, but this was recorded before peacewalker/mgs5 so it absolutely wasn’t intentional). a lot of it was a really interesting take on a familiar story, but some of the parts they changed just... were really bad. i was kind of fine with it when we finished it, but the more i thought about it, the angrier i got. 

i don’t know what the point of this is. i mostly just wanted to get out my thoughts, i suppose. it drives me insane that this is billed the way it is, like a canon thing and not some fanciful retelling by a fan. i wish it was better, but i’m at least comfortable with the fact that a lot of people in this fandom don’t seem to have any open feelings about it, if they’ve seen it at all. mgs1 hasn’t been lost to history even a little bit, and i love that. 

if we hadn’t skipped a lot of it, i’d probably have more to say, but also, i never want to see it again, so this is what you get. thanks for reading; i’m gonna write otasune fic now probably.

[selfindulgentsillinessbracket]

A Huge Update Post!!!!!!

Hi everyone, @thattoastygecko (your moderator) here. It is me.

This bracket has been quiet recently but now it is time to resume it. But I have a buncha changes to make bc let's face it, this bracket? It's an unorganized mess lmao

Congrats to our last winners!

Also I was thinking of going back to doing 2 groups of contestants at a time again, y'know 8 votes at once. Because let's face it this bracket is huge & honestly some of the entrants I kiiiind of wish I didn't put in.

Example of what I mean: Hanamusa. Don't get me wrong I love that ship, they've brought me so much comfort. But honestly they got like 600 votes. & Something about seeing them bring in THAT MUCH ATTENTION but none of the other polls got anywhere close to that kind of attention & knowing they'll probably just completely sweep the entire thing makes me think putting them in was not a great move. If only because it's gonna be super unfair & also makes me a bit sad that none of the other parts of the bracket are gonna get that much attention. I SWEAR IF I EVER TOOK THEM OUT IT'S NOT BECAUSE I HATE THEM IM HAPPY IF THEY WIN ITS JUST

seeing the rest of the poll get ignored so hard in comparison just makes me sad bc i feel like it means i did a crummy job on the rest of the tournament when it doesnt involve them, it's entirely my fault & just how my brain is, so pls understand that

But ultimately I am gonna avoid doing this, because I also don't wanna remove anyone. I mean if any character is in this poll, its because they damn well earned the right to be in this poll. They all mean something to me even if its just very very barebones like "they look cool"

I mean I put my own OCs in this fucking poll ffs & I know all of those guys are probably gonna lose. I love Oddworld but that series is obscure & I know they won't win.

LOOK AT POOR BLINX. I LOVE BLINX BUT LETS FACE IT YOU GUYS PROBABLY DONT KNOW WHO THIS IS & HES PROBABLY NOT GONNA WIN THIS NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WANT HIM TO.

Please pray for this poor cat guys, he's gonna need it. Because he's struggled to get the love he damn well deserves & by god I want him to win at least one match on this poll. He deserves at least that much.

I'm gonna try to not remove them tho bc I would feel bad if I did too, bc it's my fault for not realizing how immediatley biased this site is gonna be in their favor. I think it's just on me for not thinking that through, but I promise you guys

I PROMISE YOU AINT GONNA BE LIKE THE MODERATOR FOR THAT SAPPHIC SHIPS BRACKET THAT CANCELLED THE WHOLE THING BECAUSE THEY WERE WINNING & THEY WERE IDK SALTY OR WHATEVER???? LIKE OK BRO BUT IF YOU DIDNT WANT THEM TO WIN YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE PUTTING THEM IN BUT IM AT LEAST ADMITTING ITS MY FAULT FOR PUTTING THEM IN HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE KNOWING HOW BIASED IT WAS GONNA BE GIVEN ALL THE CONTEXT BEHIND WHAT THE SHIP WAS BUILT WITH. Aka being kickstarted by a well known popular storyboard artist with a big following & being yknow on here of all sites and etc. Like yeah it's gonna instantly be a landslide in their favor to some degree. It's like putting Rise Donatello in this bracket & being angry when he is gonna start sweeping too. Because we all know Donnie is gonna be winning several rounds at least. I know he will. & I love Rise Donnie so I'm okay with it. Donnie Nation strong. I AINT GONNA BE A BITCH LIKE THAT OTHER POLL THO NO MATTER WHAT. Like No I aint gonna cancel the whole bracket over them, if Delia & Jessie win? Fuck it I mean I put them here I knew it was gonna end up this way the second they were in the limelight. But no matter what happens I ain't gonna disqualify them for existing. I guess it's more just the fact that they got so much more attention & I cvan't help but put myself down for it.

I just kinda wanted to vent about it a bit because I was being overly mean to myself & I know it's just my brain being a jerk. So I'm gonna keep my spirits up

Also I mean heck the attention picked up a bit. Rayman fans apparently felt seen in my statements so thanks rayman nation for that. I too am salty about ubisofts treatment. Speaking of:

Thanks to your votes: MURFY IS BEING PUT IN THE BRACKET!!!

AND THANKS TO ANOTHER BONUS

MIKU IS BACK!! & After discussing it with some friends in group chats, they told me I should team her up with one of my OCs. So I went with my MAIN OC ZOEY!!

Speaking of Zoey:

1. My blog @thornsboroughcomic is a thing Zoey is the protag also thanks for voting her it means a lot to me I cried a few times ngl

2

ZOEY GOT A FULL REDESIGN A BIT AGO: Behold Zoey's current design. :]

And now Hatsune Miku has been brought back from elimination after you guys voted her to come back!! And Zoey is a huge Miku stan so she's very excited to team up with her.

And while I'm here: I'm gonna reveal to you guys some of the new contestants entering the bracket!!

I might also consider bringing back more old contestants who got eliminated via voting & maybe I'll start having team ups happen periodically that you guys vote on. I want this bracket to be just, I'm gonna embrace what a total mess it is. It's unorganized, chaotic & nonsensical & I think we just gotta embrace the pure chaos of it all. So that's what we're gonna do!!

A FEW OF THE MANY NEW CONTESTANTS COMING IN!!

[demadogs]

am i the only one that doesn’t have hope anymore? like at all? i don’t trust the duffers anymore and i feel like us(the bylers) created all this byler thing in our heads and we just looked too much into the details in the show :(

i dont blame you for not having hope bc volume 2 for byler definitely was a disappointment and i understand not wanting to look between the lines of the monologue and get hopes up only to be disappointed again but DO NOT think we just made all this up!! if byler doesnt happen i genuinely think that it was their plan originally and then they trashed it.

its not like theres two or three potential hints towards it. there are dozens and dozens of clues and subtext from the dialogue and actions of the characters but also the cinematography, the lighting, the score and tracks they use, the parallels to other couples on the show, the placement of their characters, and probably so much more we havent even noticed yet. we did not make anything up.

after volume 2 i wasnt that sad or mad because more than anything i was just VERY confused. because none of mike wheelers actions make sense unless hes deeply struggling with internalized homophobia. there will be genuine plotholes in the whole show if they stick with mlvn til the end.

lets look at mikes actions alone. can you answer ANY of these questions with an answer thats NOT related to his sexuality?

why did mike not let el touch her when they were kissing at the beginning of s3?

why did he say “its not my fault you dont like girls” if thats not projecting?

why did he say he loves her out loud to everyone else but then pretend he didnt know what she was talking about when she brought it up again?

why did he look so confused when el kissed him and said she loves him and why did he keep his eyes open and didnt kiss her back at all?

why didnt mike have any indication of even having a gf in his room besides the letter we saw him read, while el had a whole shrine and a “book of letters” from him? why did, instead, mike have wills drawings up all over the basement and has a while binder for them that we saw in s1. book of drawings.

WHY on earth wouldnt mike hug his best friend who he hasnt seen in months at the airport? its not because he knows wills feelings, the duffers and finn and the script itself have confirmed hes oblivious to his sexuality and feelings for him.

why did mike look so nervous to ask will about the painting? if it was just because their friendship was kinda dying i think he would have said it as if he was bored or didnt care but instead he looked like he cared a little too much and was trying to hide it. this is right after reading el’s letter that said that will might be painting for a girl.

why did mike barely even look at el as they were walking out of the airport and why did he wear something very different for mike as if he’s portraying someone he’s not?

why would mike emphasize so much “WE’RE FRIENDS!!! we’re friends!” will didnt mean it in a romantic context but mike took it that way.

why was mike kinda an asshole to el and didnt comfort her after the bullies at the rink? “she didnt look fine?” what the hell.

WHY COULDNT MIKE SAY OR WRITE THAT HE LOVES EL!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS THE POINT OF THAT SCENE IF HE ACTUALLY GENUINELY DOES LOVE HER??? why didnt he say it right then if he did?

why was that “i feel like i lost you” scene so god damn flirty? he’s never looked at el the way he looked at him here.

why did he nod when will told him that its scary to open up to people especially if they dont like the truth? why did finn say that this “psyches him out”?

why did mike say “its not fate, its not destiny, its just simple dumb luck” about first meeting el and then claim to her that the moment he say her in the woods was love at first sight? we know that this is a blatant lie and will should know this too.

why did mike look at will like THAT during the painting scene!!!??? (i will admit tho this could be finn wolfhard just wanting his character to be gay so he plays him gay but they could have used shots of him not looking at his lips but they kept them in.)

WHY DID WILL HAVE TO PUSH MIKE TO CONTINUE TALKING TO EL!!!!!???? HE WASNT GONNA SAY HE LOVES HER BUT WILL PUSHED HIM INTO IT!!!!!!!!

and thats just his actions alone!!! now lets look into the more technical film choices theyve made when it comes to mike wheeler. again, can you answer any of these questions with an answer thats not related to him having internalized homophobia?

why did they make it clear that max and lucas at day of the dead were having a date (“im spending romantic time with my girlfriend”) and then choose to place mike and will together but not with them, as if mike and will were on a date too.

why did they film mike and el’s break up in s3 so playfully and humorous with bright lighting, lots of colors, an audience, max and el laughing, and fun music after vs mike and will’s fight which was very dark and blue, pouring rain, harsh shadows, and played an emotional original score track?

WHY the eye witness parallel?

why would they frame mike in a closet in s3 during that awkward unreciprocated kiss? this is the biggest thing by far for me that makes me think he’s gay for sure.

why did they frame mike reading el’s letter so that theres a literal fucking one way sign pointing to an open closet?

why did bouncy upbeat music play when he and el reunited at the airport? they could have made it emotional but they made it light and playful as if its more friendly than romantic.

WHY DID THEY PLAY A TRACK CALLED “IN THE CLOSET” WHEN MIKE STARTS SPEAKING!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT WILL!!! this is also right after he said “we’re firends we’re friends!!” no its not just because el is in a literal closet here, the track starts during mike and wills fight.

why did they play a track that is EXTREMELY similar to the track eulogy during mike and el’s fight, a track thats only played when someone dies.

(emotional, tender music). why. its only used in romantic contexts. we see it used with byler, lumax, jopper, and once with mlvn when theyre at the pizza place.

why did they frame will out of focus in the middle of mike and el when they reunited!!? at first i thought this was just to emphasize will’s pov but now im thinking it might be more symbolic of will getting in between mike and eleven. he himself isnt doing that at all though, quite the opposite actually- he keeps giving mike relationship advice and hes the reason mike told el he loves her, so it must be in reference to how will is disrupting mike and els relationship because of mikes feelings for him.

why did they keep will in the frame when mike said he loved her? the only other time we had a similar one on one emotional monologue delivery to someone was in s2 when joyce, jonathan, and mike were trying to reach will and mike told him asking him to be friends was the best thing hes ever done. that was shot as if there were no one else in the room it was very centered around just will and mike, whereas this monologue shows will in the same frame as mike as well as will and jonathans reactions to what hes saying.

and lastly, WHY did they frame every couple so dramatically paired off together in the final shot while el was all alone. joyce and hopper, mike and will, and jonanathan and nancy. theyve done this in the past but this was the first time they made it excruciatingly obvious.

damn i wasnt gonna list out every thing i know when i first started answering this but thats what i ended up doing. anyways, again, i understand giving up considering how disappointing volume 2 was, but absolutely no way was it all in our heads. look at all that.

i still have hope just for the sheer fact that not only mike wheeler as a character, but all their film choices surrounding mike wheeler make no fucking sense unless hes gay and DEEP in the closet.

[binalakai]

🍅🧅🍏🥑 wahoo fruit party!!

How misunderstood is your OC? In-universe or IRL. oh god. okay. okay Hue Man on Earth is a story that is. REALLY hard for me to share, despite how much I do try to talk about it publicly (or at least update my toyhouse as much as possible when i feel like doing that), there's always that sense of. people either boiling my characters down to Tropes/who's the Bad one and who's the Good One. whos the character thats meant to be a personal attack on someone (none of them are) n whos the character that is meant to be relatable (none of them are PURPOSELY written to be that way) n it just. really goddamn sucks sometimes. i could talk about specifics with my main trio specifically, over the course of time that i've had Hue, Magni, and Clyde, theyve all been weirdly misunderstood in their own way that i have gotten to the point of having to reevaluate those folks n look inward into seeing if that perception of themselves can be weaved into the plot. but honestly i think ill catch myself in a bad mood atm if i think about it too hard. tldr on that; i try to microdose my story when sharing it to others, n even then i get really nervous about the idea that my story wont be valued/understood as a whole, which is partially of my own doing as well bc i do have a tendency to Put a Lot into characters once i get super attached to them. ..so nowadays im too burned out to do that :"P once i make that pitch bible, it probably still wont fix that, but its still a project im committing to nonetheless! 🧅 [ONION] What is surefire to make your OC cry? Who knows of this information? Hue) hard to answer with a creature like him. objectively, he doesnt cry. its not needed for him to release emotion the same way it does for Earth-things. but he does it anyway, or at least the equivalent (letting go of parts of his body in droplets from his eyes, just for them to crawl back to his body) it's less about "am i sad right now and do i have to cry" and more like "is crying appropriate for this situation.". after his Human arc in arc 5, its something he actually stops doing as a whole because experiencing the feeling of crying in a human body like. Actually Fucks him up REAL bad NJWKEFNAJKWFNAKWEF Magni) the "sillier" or "unrelated to themselves" the issue is, the more theyll have a tendency to genuinely cry over it. they cry when they know no one else is there to mourn over the problem they're crying about, which is why they'll have a very Stone Flat Face when Witnessing the horrors, but will have an absolute meltdown over dropping their favorite cup Clyde) Honestly that motherfucker will cry over. like....anything? Honestly? to the point where it can be unpredictable. Clyde's emotions are based less on the Cause of Crying and more about the intensity of its emotions. any time it gets overwhelmed, it will cry, and its been labeled a crybaby inuniverse because of that 🍏 [GREEN APPLE] How do they differ from the norm and how are they punished for it? answering this all together, and honestly without having to like. explain the whole plot of HMoE in one setting. Hue seen as different from the norm not because he's an alien but because he's technically an illegal immigrant, Magni and Clyde are autistic PoC that also Do Not Fit Well into their hometown whatsoever. may i need to say anything else. 🥑 [AVACADO] What will they never back down about, even if it makes them seem bad?

Hue) trying to be seen as a good person, even if it means doing the most heinous shit possible (as long as he's able to hide it/insist on good intentions) Magni) trying to be seen as the Right Person, even if it means twisting things in their favor SPECIFICALLY to be right (though will admit to it redhanded if theyre caught, more out of being impressed if anything) Clyde) trying to be seen as the Truthful Person, even if it means ruining everyone's day/life about it (it''ll try to seem like it doesnt care about being "bad", but it very much actually eats away at it. every single damn day)

[mxboxlocks]

tf2 hc designs are my everything i wish i had the courage to make mine crazier or smth but mine are just sat there like

i like them that way tho. perhaps someday i'll project even more onto soldier and give him a mullet. perhaps i'll make him even edgier. who knows /lh

ramble below (im sleep deprived as all hell) it might be considered a vent? but its not intense im kind of just bitching /lh, nm

anyways man so. im a little insecure about the way i write soldier bc im scared he comes off like i said, edgy?? when really its like no this guy isn't edgy per se he just has a lot of feelings he refuses to feel. traumatized (in denial) type stuff

i have like a small timeline of his life and family and all that and like yeah it's a little sad but idk i fear trying too hard. i think its perfectly fine. in fact i like my solly a lot. he's very near and dear to me considering he's. well me /kin

and thats the thing too is i wish that were enough but i want people to see in my work what i see in my work i guess. and thats not always gonna happen period, different perspectives exist and shit

like i said im severely sleep deprived i've only slept a couple of hours and i feel high forgive me

umm what else. ah yes of course the edgy thing yeah i guess i just dont want him to seem so out of character that hes not even soldier anymore. bc unfortunately soldier has been so flanderized through the comics and shorts over the years (thank god for emesis blue) that he's just kind of been reduced to a bumbling happy-go-lucky guy that'd kick your ass given the chance. but i think - nay know - he's more than that, and i like showing those parts of him that are there, but i don't want it to be dismissed as out-of-character simply because he isn't really written on deeper levels in canon

anyways thank you for readin, i'll prolly stop thinkin about this when i go back to sleep i just like talking. dont worry about me either, im not hurt none too much, or at all for that matter /gen

[upsidedowngrass]

Honestly I think Airy wrote down notes if they were just... interesting to him. Or maybe if they sparked some sort of memory?

Because yeah! He DOESN'T use that info for anything! No one else is going to see it but him! Why not write cool stuff about the people in your show! Secret lore!

But MAINLY the thing that freaks me out is how did Airy get that picture of Bryce. Everyone else's could possibly be on social media, a phone, some sort of camera, Liam's is his work computer. But Bryce is passed out drunk on the FLOOR. He doesn't have FRIENDS. Why would his phone be out??? There aren't cameras in apartment buildings either??? HOW DID HE GET THAT PICTURE. Does the computer give you some level of omnipotence in the real world that isn't through technology? That's SO scary!!!

Airy also could have updated it as he went? Maybe after the pool incident he wrote it down? But again like you said he doesn't really... pick up on it well. I GUESS Bryce could have mentioned it somewhere but... Why would he? Unless it was in a conversation with someone (wait. a therapist maybe? telehealth?), which brings me back to Can Airy See Things On Earth That Aren't Cameras/Videos? Did he pick the contestants randomly like season one or did he put thought into them? He made the pages for everyone either way but... Still.

Sorry this is so rambly I've been thinking about this my entire work shift and I still can't be coherent T-T

ITS OK i also think abt it A LOT and i like to talk about one ALL the time!!!!!!!!

tbh YEAH itd track so much for airy to just. write down little notes for very little purpose other than fun. just taking notes of all these fascinating things about his contestants. like 'wow theyre all so interesting huh!!' it is VERY in character for him to just write things down for the sake of it

GOD YEAH... it is SOO. its one of the most unsettling things abt the database, and raises SO many questions. i think maybe?? it COULD be an omnipotence thing but maybe someone was there? maybe bradley brought him home and his phone out for literally anything ??? and airy was like oh well theres my image! but even then its. you have NO other image of this guy, why did you PICK him. how did u even FIND him if the apparent only image you can get of him is smth that def was not easily available. its JARRING and UNSETTLING

i think if airy were to connect the dots that ep 6 gave any of them thalassophobia, hed put it for all of them, but telehealth IS a good bet??? assuming the computer can only access things like cameras and stuff. this WOULD also mean bryce got a therapist after getting home which WOULD track w him trying to get his life in order, and also the idea of this makes me SO happy. but also sad. bc he was trying to RECOVER good for him!!!! but also . then this wouldve been a bit halted. tho also this would be one more person concerned for his wellbeing after he disappears AGAIN which IS good i think. but sorry bryces therapist thats prob a bit concerning for ur client to drop off the face of the earth (literally)

i DO all the time think abt how much he planned. bc i do think it was prob a bit less random?? maybe?? what with none of the people being picked being from france this time. but he also DID bring a baby. but also?? he does clearly put at least a little thought into it, since s3 was a bit planned out!!! he seems to plan things out more and more thru the series so this could be New, but i think it indicates some level of consideration abt who he picks!!! (that and... he picked bryces coworker and NOT his friend? so he may just not be the greatest at sticking to contestants that make sense Logistically, making that a running theme in all of his seasons)

[fecto-forgo]

For the character list ask: Renfield, Mordred?

OHH BOTH FAVORITES AT ONCE NICE

renfield

favorite thing:hes just like me hes just like me fr

least favorite thing:dead </3

favorite line:all the times he gets to be mean to seward.sooo funny of him

brOTP:i wish he got to have like.a positive relationship i could put here.uh.i think seeing him and quincey interact would have been fun

OTP:n/a i hc him as aro lol

NOTP:renfield/seward i have it filtered out bc its literally triggering for me LMAO

random headcanon:if i give him self hitting autism will i go to jail for overdosing on self indulgence hcs

unpopular opinion:id usually have one but my minds blanking out uhh none of stokers hate crime attempts w his character worked on me baby girl i am just like that too.i am fine w his portrayal in 99% of his scenes.in fact we should let him be more violent he earned that

song i associate w them:the masters song

favorite picture of them:i dont wanna risk tumblr deleting everything ive written so ill fetch the pictures later but that scene in spanish dracula where hes sitting silly after seward pulls him up the balcony.god i love rubio renfield he gets it

mordred

favorite thing:he is also just like me+i like assholes

least favorite thing:the fcking post vulgate stories that try making him into a rapist.the entirety of the post vulgate is garbage overall but oh my god they really created "use rape as empathy shock factor" huh...i saw one person bring up the possibility of writing stuff w the rapist mordred takes and wanted to punch the wall.let that shit die permanently

favorite line:ik idylls of the queen is a modern book but i love that little exchange he was w kay where kay tells him god damned him to hell and he goes "yeah ♥️"

brOTP:i love love love his relationship w agravaine treason brothers <3 personality disorder solidarity <333

OTP:sorry for being a mordred kinnie stereotype </3 but galadred.its actually them+percival but i write galahad and mor in such a mentally ill way they hate each other for half the story in my head and its fun for me to think about

NOTP:literally anything w incest GOD why is there a published book where he falls in love w his father.

random headcanon:the way i write the patrice murder story in my head has him climbing the castle walls to overhear conversations from outside the windows for investigation.he also hid under a bed at some point for that as well.weirdo

unpopular opinion:i HATE the once and future king but th white was onto something w the take hes a hyper paranoid asshole who thinks everyones out to hurt him and cries if someones slightly mean back.he literally fits the whole ppd criteria th white wants to fuck ppl w ppd so bad (also idylls of the queen did the same take but like being normal about him so no credit to white regardless lol) i simply do not think he can work as just a sad snarky emo boy.psychotic-fy his ass!

song i associate w them:debt collector

favorite picture of them:that one where he has dragon themed armor and the dragon sword.god theres no way clarent (the sword) came w the dragon wings on it he 100% had them alter it for his dad killing outfit

[pinkseas]

u kno the drill

IN THE MIDDLE OF CLASS AND A LECTURE HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE OH YM GOD dont blame u tho id probably do the same

“ITS SO NICE that both of them get to teach each other what they lack” what can i say a girl will think of two characters being able to teach things to each other and lose her mind a little bit about it

“wanderer having absolutely No Filters when talking to kid as young as collei but still being sorta courteous to her trauma is so fUCKIGN FUNNY IM NGL AT LEAST USE PROPER WORDS BRO THATS A CHILDKFHSHHF” i am giggling sm at this you have no idea

“i didnt even know youd actually USE the fjsjhfjahf all the things u slid in answering my ask abt xiao albedo contributinf and its sO GREAT ITS SO FUNNY” I DIDNT KNOW I WAS GONNA USE THEM EITHER ADMITTEDLY at first None of those beginning bits were supposed to be there it started when collei walked into the room but. well. i am Weak and Predictable and i thought itd be a little silly to include it just a little bit

“albedo's willingness to help being connected to his own moral strength regarding protecting his family at all costs is Real” as much as i adore him and got the vibe that he Would be willing for many reasons i dont actually know his character very well at all so i am genuinely so glad to hear you of all people say this as an albedo lover it feels like ive done right by the world

“it was so satisfying that she could do it with her own hands no matter how vicious it was” oh to have had collei slice his ribcage open tear the bones out one by one and rip his still-beating heart from his chest.... idk i had a lot of things that didnt feel like they would’ve been as satisfying just bc he wouldve died so quickly bc of it but i do kinda wish id used that as an ending instead. the vines still consume his corpse and she drops the heart and lets it be eaten up until there’s nothing left and she can remember the way it felt to tear it out and hold it and........ man idk. there’s just. something So Personal about her doing it herself about it being with her own two hands about her laying his hands on him so many times even with magic at her disposal i couldnt NOT do it

“idt doijg it a few hours till dawn is Enough BUT AS LONG AS SHES SATISFIED IT IS NOW” NO BC LITERALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY i did also strongly consider her deciding she was done with him and letting scara have a turn to fuck him up but admittedly i kind of just wanted to get it over with and i didnt have enough ideas to really make it as satisfying as i wanted it to be which is so sad

 “the dottorture” HAS ME WHEEZING OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

“he lets collei do all the work do all whats needed to give that payback even tho hes also part of the experiment. his empathy is way less unseen and hes willing to give it all to collei despite himself swearing to the gods he despise that dottore should just Suffer. but if its in the hands of someone else and he could see it all thats just as much satisfaction when he gets to see collei finding solace at such young age” yeah <3333333333333 as much as he’d Love to kill dottore over and over and over again i think seeing him suffer at the hands of another person he fucked up so badly is enough. not ideal, not what he wouldve first thought of or really wanted, but enough. especially given that its someone he at least somewhat cares about who’ll be able to find a lot more peace in the act than scara probably would have. idk. i feel like if dottore’s other selves hadn’t been erased and scaramouche had hunted them down and tortured and killed them one by one in all kinds of different ways until every last one of them was gone it just. still wouldnt be enough. nothing would truly be enough to make him pay. but for collei, this is enough, this is more than enough, seeing him dead is enough, and if only one of them can find true satisfaction and peace with his passing regardless of how it happens he might as well give it to her.

im also glad that the hug didnt feel too out of place LMAO i feel like i was kind of pushing it there but w/e that whole thing was me pushing it why not go a little further

[everythingsinred]

001 gakuen alice

wow really! how random that u chose this manga that i dont even care about or whatever

001

Favorite character: tie with natsume and mikan! natsume has been my favorite since day one but even though it took me some time to love mikan as much, they rly are equal to me.

Least Favorite character: UGH like theres characters i hate, like esp and persona, but whose roles in the story i mostly appreciate. if theres a character im kinda meh abt, even regarding his role in the story........ maybe tono? lol i have no real outstanding feelings abt him

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): im assuming this is romantic? if so: natsume/mikan, hotaru/ruka, koko/sumire, tsubasa/misaki, narumi/misaki-sensei. but ill include nonromantic as well bc i want to: natsume&ruka, hotaru&subaru, mikan&yuka, main 4 as a friend group (which is what we deserved rather than the three of them barely interacting outside of their bond with mikan), and the special ability group (namely tsubasa and misaki with mikan)

Character I find most attractive: kaoru

Character I would marry: maybe yuka. shes the one i would most trust above all. definitely the Best adult in the series. and most sensible.

Character I would be best friends with: UGh maybe yuka again. i trust her the most. its also bizarre now that im closer with age to her than i am with the main characters lmao. yuka is underrated though

a random thought: i have a rudimentary understanding of how alices are sorted according to ability but im ngl i still have trouble comprehending why some of the special ability students arent in latent or somatic. i just accept that i wont understand and leave it at that.

An unpopular opinion: the ending being bad is NOT unpopular. my unpopular opinion is that im not a big fan of like the last 30-40 chapters in general, not just the last three. theres parts i like, but mostly i think it could have been better done. also i dont like that mikan got the stealing alice. i dont like that choice really. i hope that doesnt sound arrogant but honestly im tired so if it comes across that way oh well.

My Canon OTP: natsumikan... ahh im so lucky

My Non-canon OTP: tbh hotaru and ruka! my sister and i made a banger playlist for them and i have sobbed just thinking of their potential. i honestly rly dont care if ppl think theyre a random couple or a way to pair off the spares--i think theyd be a genuinely good match and their scenes together are to die for.

Most Badass Character: probably either natsume or yuka but that badassery also just makes me sad

Most Epic Villain: ew none (ga is not an example of media where i root for the villains lol)

Pairing I am not a fan of: this is such a vague prompt. ill just say that i resent when ppl make one character the character they "ship with everybody" (namely mikan) bc that character tends to be female and there tends to be some very suspect implications about her agency and role in the relationships, like its more abt other ppls interest in her than in her own feelings. im not saying ppl who multiship are all like that (and im sure most multishippers are entirely reasonable) but ive seen enough takes in that vein for it to really rub me the wrong way. i rly genuinely only ship mikan romantically with natsume.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): ugh i lowkey dont wanna fully answer this but ill give it a go. first idc abt persona redemption, especially if it comes at the cost of his victims' experiences, so like no. he couldve just maybe died or smth instead. ALSO as ive mentioned with her having the stealing alice, i think mikan's end was not really that great for her character. it bums me out.

Favourite Friendship: natsume and ruka hands down no contest. dont argue with me; i wont listen

Character I most identify with: ah a lot. natsume bc. child abuse victim with anger issues. ruka bc pervasive loneliness and feeling of being a burden. mikan bc god am i really good for nothing can i even offer anything? i hate this prompt its too personal

Character I wish I could be: none lol the choices are to be abused, abuse others, or both so none. maybe id be jii-chan, he truly is outside that whole mess.

if you would like to send me an ask for a character/ship/show or you'd like to rb the original post yourself, heres the link!

[conways]

oh btw i was lowkey bullied for like. Being Conw/ay yesterday so i rlly rlly rlly have 2 say that like. ughh hang on this is so embarrassing

ok to preface i know this is stupid and i know i dont Need to say anything about it, i hope to god none of my friends or mutuals would think to mock me for literally just kinning a character really hard but whatever what Ever. i just know that if i just talk/post about it out loud itll make me feel better.

ANYWAY i stopped going by my previous chosen name (connor, which i chose at like age 13 out of a baby name book) bc i had issues related to it and my mom that put a sour taste in my mouth, and chose Con/way bc it was close to it while also being the same as a character i very closely identified with, so its really special to me just like as a trans person to be so heavily associated with a male character yk >_<

i believe in the multiverse, i believe in reincarnation, i believe that our souls universe hop when all is said and done. thats how i kin and its very special to me :( its a spiritual belief that i was conway, its just nice for me to now get to say i am conway - mostly for fun but also just bc its gender affirming for me.

IDK again this is so stupid and embarrassing but someone said smth abt it yesterday and even tho we talked i still feel just like. sad. embarrassed. i know its dumb but idk :(

[asfdhgsdkjhgb]

mmmm many thoughts head full

[crispy-sand-gator]

wanna make a trans dude/nb character who doesnt dress how ppl expect them to n shit, but im afraid ppl r gonna shit their pants over the design or call it transphobic or fetishy or smth even tho itd literally be how i am irl 👁️  👁️