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#guack
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If i were a peasant in king’s landing and saw her you bet your ass I would think she’s the Mother Incarnate
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eatmyassssssssz · 1 year
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"atta girl." GUACK GUACK GUACK SUCK SUCK SUCK. PICK OUT OF THE THREE HOLES AND 2 HANDS.
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onilorian · 2 years
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To See Him Again.
Gojo Satoru x F!Reader [⚠️SMUT⚠️]
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[ACTUAL PLOT BEFORE GUACK GUACK, Slight angst, smut, MDNI!]
Contains: oral (both receiving), cream pie, fingering, GOJO BEING AGRESSIVE WITH YO SHIRT???
6,121 WORDS
(Look for 🌸🌸🌸 if you wanna skip to smut. It will also indicate when smut ends)
The reader left Gojo years ago only to be found again by Gojo as he'd spent the entire time following any lead to her.
_________________
How many years had it been? Six? Seven even? No... closer to eight.
No matter the case, you wouldn't return to him.
Not after what happened all those years ago when you nearly died.
Not to Gojo, but to Geto. When Geto had turned and abandoned the school he nearly killed you, and it left Gojo in pieces.
After Gojo saw you on death's door he'd never acted the same around you. One minute he wanted to be by your side every second, not wanting to take his eyes off of you, and the next he wouldn't show up to see you for weeks.
So one day you disappeared all together. He was grieving as if you'd died, well, you almost did. Perhaps that he wasn't sure how to handle the idea of you... dying.
But all those years your mind never forgot him. It replayed memories of you two together every goddamn night.
Especially the week before Geto nearly killed you.
Gojo looked down at you, his sunglasses sitting low on the bridge of his nose. A smirk played on his face as he had you pressed up against the wall.
"You're incoherent, Gojo. I don't get what you're trying to do..." You said, your heart beating rapidly as your breathing was sporadic. Gojo's crystal blue eyes looked down at your hand against the wall before he reached for it, grabbing your wrist and lifting it.
He moved his hand so his palm was against yours. His eyes flickered back to your face as his lips were gaped. "I'm asking you..." He said as his fingers intertwined with your own. "To be mine." He finished his sentence as his face inched closer to yours.
"B-Be yours?" You asked, his lips ghosting over yours. Your eyes flickering between his own and his lips.
Gojo smiled and laughed a little, "Yes..." He said as he tilted his head. "What do you say?" He asked and you bit your lip before nodding.
Gojo airly chuckled in relief as he brought his other hand to your hip and pulled you off the wall before kissing you. He had to bend over just so his face would reach your own.
It had been so long ago, so why did it feel like it was just yesterday he asked you to be his?
You shook your head as you continued your way through the busy streets of Seoul in South Korea.
As you kept walking, you immediately glanced over to the man you knew was about to pick pocket a teenage girl.
You grabbed his wrist as he pulled it out of his coat pocket, letting the oblivious girl walk away as you stared into the man's eyes.
"That's not very gentlemanly of you, sir." You said and you watched as nervous beads of sweat formed on his head. You both were at a standstill on a crosswalk. He pulled his arm away as he trembled "Y-You knew- ergh- leave me alone!" He said as he briskly walked away in the opposite direction, plans being foiled.
Your power gave you the ability to have heightened senses, and being able to sense the intentions of people around you.
You smirked as you let out a huff from your nose in amusement.
You suddenly felt a chill down your spine and turned around. You swore to any God that ruled above you saw a man with snow white hair, and a black blindfold along with a black jacket and pants.
Your eyes widened as you whipped around and walked away.
You were just seeing things. That's all. It was nothing more.
You took your medicine from your coat pocket and popped it in your mouth before swallowing it. You often hallucinated, mostly of Gojo, but sometimes of traumatic people from your past, an example being Geto.
Your pace was quick as a cold sweat broke out all over your body.
It's just a hallucination. Just a hallucination..
But you'd never felt such an intense physical reaction before seeing a hallucination. What was wrong with you? Maybe you needed stronger medicine... you thought you'd been doing better though.
You made your way home the long way. You kept clenching your pill bottle over and over. Once you got in the elevator and it closed you let out a breath you didn't know you'd been holding.
Damn, that really was the thanks you get from the gods for saving a girl from being pick pocketed. You shook your head as you made your way to your apartment.
You grabbed your keys and just as you were about to open the door, the presence you'd felt before hit you like a train again.
Your eyes went wide as your keys ghosted before the lock.
No.. no no no.
It's not real, there's no way he could be in there. You hadn't felt this presence in years. You'd done EVERYTHING to cover your tracks. He couldn't have found you.
What would you do if he really was in there?
Maybe you shouldn't go inside, you should go to the hospital.
You pocketed your keys and turned around. But before you could take a step, you heard the lock to the door unlock, and the handle turn before the door opened.
You stood frozen, shaking in your own boots. What were you doing? You needed to move.
"Y/n." He said, his voice the same as you remember.
"Y-You're not... You're not real..." You mumbled to yourself, squeezing your eyes shut as tears threatened to spill.
"Y/n. Look at me." You heard Gojo say. You stood still for a moment before quickly turning around and screaming, "YOU'RE NOT REAL!"
But he was standing there, in your doorway.
Your eyes widened and you took a clumsy step backwards, causing you to fall back and you scooted away until your back was against the wall.
Your entire body was shaking as you looked up at him.
You then heard the door of your neighbor's apartment begin to open, your power not working because of how distracted you were, otherwise you would have already known she was coming to her front door to leave.
But when you blinked you were in your apartment right against Gojo.
"Y/n." He said again and you stared up at him. "I'm here. I found you." He said as he let you go, deciphering you wouldn't make an attempt to run.
"H-How..." You said, speechless.
"I finally... found you." He said as he sunk to his knees and grabbed your ankles. His sobs filled the air as he cried at your feet.
"You... looked for me?" You asked as he cried, shock was written all over your face.
"F-For eight years, one hundred and twenty-three days, 10 hours, and 3 minutes. I finally... finally found you." He said as he stood up.
He... found you.
His hands gently grabbed your arms just above your elbows. "Come home." He said and your eyes widened.
"No!" You said and his grip on you tightened at your answer, not hard enough to injure you though.
Gojo let go of your arms and one hand reached up to his blindfold. You reached for his arm and grabbed it. "Don't." You said, how could you bear to look him in the eyes again?
He paused for a moment, his grip still tight on his blindfold. But he continued, your grip on him very loose.
You gasped as you looked into his eyes again.
Even if you had remembered him for all these years, all his details, and yet you could never get over how stunning his eyes were.
"Why did you... leave me?" He asked as he placed his free hand on your cheek, his other hand still grasping onto his blindfold.
Tears slid from your eyes, Gojo wiped one away with his thumb as you stared into his eyes. It was almost like you were looking into the entirety of the universe itself.
"Tell me." He said, snapping you out of your trance. You realized you'd still been holding onto his arm that held the blindfold, and so you let go as you took a step back. "It took you eight years to find me?" You asked as you looked away, wiping the tears.
"You knew I was coming every time." He said and you furrowed your eyebrows. So when you felt that pit of dread in your stomach, that was him?
"You left because of Geto?" He questioned but you kept your gaze on the floor.
"No." You replied. Short, simple, straightforward. Yet Gojo was astonished. "N-No?" He stuttered.
"No?!" He asked again as he placed his hands on the sides of your cheeks, lifting your head. "No, Gojo!" You said, trying to drill the answer into him.
"M-Me?" He asked and your lip began to quiver.
"Yes, Gojo." You replied and his hands on the sides of your face loosened before his arms fell to his sides.
"I... hurt... you?" He asked but you shook your head. "It was because... I hurt you." You said, and Gojo placed his hand on the wall, as if he were losing his balance.
"No you.. you didn't, you couldn't." He said as he slid down the wall, he knew he was lying right through his teeth, and yet he couldn't believe you left because you'd hurt him.
"Yes, I did. I saw what my near death experience did to you. Couldn't you be happy I left?! The thought of me possibly being alive could have been enough for you! What would have happened if you found out I really was dead?!" You yelled and Gojo's eyes widened.
Suddenly, the entire building began to shake, Gojo's body trembled, but not because of the quake of the building.
You dropped to the ground and put your hands on either side of his face. "Gojo!" You exclaimed, suddenly snapping him out of his trance. Just as you did, the building stopped shaking.
"Don't you see what I mean? Even the thought still hurts you! I don't want to do this to you anymore!" You said as tears continued to spill, both from his eyes and yours.
"Then come with me." He said as he looked up into your eyes, his slumped figure causing you to gain height over him. His hands placed themselves on your wrists as your own hands stayed on either side of his face.
"Let me protect you, I promise that as long as you're with me I'll-" He said and you scoffed, "What kind of life is that? Keeping me trapped, not to mention what if you're put in a difficult situation you can't always be there for me, it's just not possible." You explained, why couldn't he understand?
"But it is possible! Because I love you I will-" He said and your breathing hitched. Gojo's mouth hung open, words coming to a halt.
"Gojo you..." You trailed off, so stunned by his words.
"But after all this time and you...?" You asked, not having to finish your question for him to understand.
"How could I not? My mind was plagued by you every day and every night. It felt like torture not to have you with me, Y/N. Eight years of torture. Do you know how many times I've replayed my memories with you? Not only in my mind but even my domain. I would open my domain just to see you again." He said as his hands left your wrists and covered his face.
"Did you... ever feel the same? Did you forget about me at all? Could you make it through a day without thinking about me?" He asked, and you choked out a sob.
"N-No... No Gojo." You cried as you sunk against the wall and finally sat completely on the wooden floor.
You both cried to yourselves for a moment, neither making any physical contact with the other.
But you were the first to break the silence.
"Gojo... I love you too..." You said through your shaky breaths.
Gojo sat still for a moment before removing his hands from his face. His beautiful eyes filled with tears as the surrounding skin of his eyes began to swell a puffy red from the crying.
"Then please... Be with me again. I promise I can protect you this time, I will do it." He said as he slowly reached out his hand.
You looked at his hand and then up at his eyes. It was too hard for you to deny Gojo.
"Okay..." You said as you took his hand and he helped you off the floor and into his arms.
He embraced you tightly as soon as you stood up.
🌸🌸🌸
Gojo released you, but kept his gaze on you. "Gojo..." You whispered, your cold hands slowly made their way, shakily, up to the sides of his face.
"How... How long has it been again?" You asked as your thumb stroked his bottom lip. "Too long." He replied in a whisper as he kissed the pad of your thumb.
He grabbed your hand and brought it away from his face, leaving your other one to trail to his shoulder as he pressed kisses against your palm.
They were warm and comforting. His crystal eyes bore into your own as he watched your face flush.
He kissed from your palm to your wrist, and then a little higher up before the sleeve of your jacket got in the way.
His face neared your own. "Can I kiss you?" He asked and you nodded without hesitation.
His lips pressed against your own, they were slightly chapped but it's okay because yours were too.
Gojo let go of the hand he'd planted kisses on, and you placed it behind his neck as he continued to kiss you softly.
Gojo slowly pressed you against the wall of the hallway, his lips pressing against yours a little harder and soon the kissing became a full blown makeout.
"I want you." He whispered between kisses as his leg made it between your own legs and his thigh pressing against you.
"You want me... too?" He asked as he broke away a few times. You nodded frantically as your hands tangled themselves in his pure white hair.
His hand made its way to the top of your jacket and he unzipped it for you before helping you take it off. He took off his own jacket as well, both discarded somewhere on the floor.
His thigh slightly rubbed against your clothed clit and you whimpered. Gojo smiled as he moved his lips from your own and to your jaw.
The friction made you crave more, and you began to grind against his thigh. "So needy. Needy for me all these years too?" He asked before licking and sucking on your neck.
You nodded as you squeezes your eyes shut and Gojo's lips left your neck as his left hand placed itself on the side of your face. "Let me see your eyes. I want to see you experience the pleasure I give you." He said and you opened your eyes, but your eyelids were quite hooded.
"Where's your room?" He asked and he picked you up but putting his hands underneath your thighs and lifting you up. You gasped at his sudden action while you wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck.
"Turn right down the hallway, room at the very end." You said and Gojo grinned. He kissed you as he carried you both to your room.
He folded over when he approached your bed so he could gently set you down. He then broke from the kiss before grabbing the hem of his shirt with his arms crossed and then finally lifting it up and over his head before tossing it aside.
He crawled back onto the bed with you, hot kisses started at your neck as they worked down to your exposed collarbone that your shirt didn't help to protect.
"You too..." Gojo mumbled as he tugged at your shirt in between the kisses and licks to your collarbone. "Help me then." You whispered and Gojo smirked against your exposed skin.
"My pleasure." He said before quickly ripping open your shirt. Not taking it off like he did his own, like pulling it over your head, but ripping it from the front, exposing your breasts in their bra.
"G-Gojo!" You exclaimed. "You asked for my help" He said as he snaked an arm around you to pull you closer as he kissed your chest. "I really liked that shirt." You mumbled, not actually caring for the shirt but wanting to see his reaction.
"I will buy you ten more for the one I ripped, any shirts you want." He said as his hand reached the clasp of your bra and he undid the clasp.
The feeling of cold air hit your now exposed nipples made you whimper, your tits hardening even more than before.
"Look at you, so beautiful and you please me even more with those sounds you make." He said, a slight growl in the back of his throat as he instantly attached his mouth to one of your nipples. His hand reached for your other breast, he first cupped it and squeezed it, causing you to moan, but his touch became more refined as his fingers played with your tit.
"Agh- Gojo-" You moaned out as your hand placed itself in his locks.
You heard the struggle of him trying to get his belt off. "Too tight." He mumbled against your tit, but he was struggling to get the belt off.
"Let me help." You said as you reached down and swiftly undid his belt. He quickly got his pants along with his boxers off, no wonder he complained about his pants being tight he was fucking HUGE.
He placed his hand on it stroking it a few times, panting hot breath onto your breast.
You surprised him when your fingertips brushed against the underside of his cock and he nearly lost it. Feeling someone else's fingers on him other than his own calloused ones made him nearly cum right on the spot, even moreso because it was your fingers.
You managed to flip Gojo over onto the bed and moved your way down, he was completely frozen, stunned at your ability to take charge just like that.
You gently grabbed the base of his cock and his head immediately hit the pillows as he groaned.
"Gojo." You said and he lifted his head. "Let me see your eyes. I want to see you experience the pleasure I give you." You said, repeating his words from earlier.
"F-Fuck-" He moaned out loving the seductive expression on your face. He could feel his face becoming completely flushed as you said that to him.
Each second you were becoming even more attractive to him even though before he'd found you the most attractive person in the universe.
You kissed the tip as you looked up at him and he let out a shaky breath, his muscles tensed. You moved down further and stuck out your tongue before pressing it against the base of his cock and licking all the way up to the tip.
Gojo let out a deep groan as you placed his entire tip in your hot mouth. "L-Look at you, taking me in like I'm a treat." He said, another groan following his words.
You went down on him further, bobbing your head up and down slowly. "You're s-so good, Y/N." He said as his hand found its way into your hair.
His palm was large against the back of your head, and your hair felt lovely against his fingers.
You took it a step further and moved your head down as far as you could. Once you did this, Gojo held you there for a moment, with the tip pressed against the back of your throat as your nose pressed against the lower part of his abdomen.
You gagged a little, tears forming in the corners of your eyes. Gojo released you and you immediately came up for air, coughing a little.
"Taste good?" He whispered as his icy blue eyes watched your expression. You nodded as you went back down on him, this time going down further and speeding up.
Gojo's thighs began to tense up and his breathing became labored. "W-Wait." He said and you lifted your head up in confusion.
"Your turn." Gojo said before flipping you while you were caught off guard. You let out a squeal of surprise before his hands reached the button of your jeans.
He took off your pants and then hooked his finger onto your panties. He glanced up at your face for a moment, which was entirely flushed, watching him do all these things to you was the hottest thing you could have ever witnessed.
Gojo smirked before slowly sliding your panties down. A trail of your sickness connecting you and your panties for a brief moment.
Gojo's eyes widened. "You're so... beautiful." He said as his hand trailed up your thigh and he pushed it to the side slightly.
You hid your face with your hands from embarrassment, although Gojo was so captivated he almost didn't notice it.
"Eyes on me." He whispered, you could feel his breath against your folds. You quickly removed your hands from your face when he licked a line against your folds and you moaned.
"G-Gojo! F-Feels s' good." You said and he grinned. "You think so? Let me go at it some more then. I like hearing those sounds you make." He said as he attached his tongue to your clit.
You cried out with another moan as one of your hands flew to his hair. His tongue then slid down and to your folds where he darted it inside of you.
His hand found its way to your clit while his other one kept a decent grip on your thigh to prevent you from shutting your legs.
As soon as he was eating you out AND rubbing circles on your clit your hips bucked and you shut your eyes in embarrassment.
Gojo's face left your folds and his hand that had been preoccupied with your thigh gathered up some of your slick before sliding two fingers in.
You arched your back as you moaned out "Gojo!"
Gojo smiled devilishly, loving how he could make you squirm under him with simply his fingers.
Gojo spent only a few moments looking for that spot within you. He knew he found it when you suddenly gasped and moaned out "There! Right there."
His fingers then began to hit that spot faster, over and over you felt as if your quick breathing was becoming in sync with the rhythm of his fingers.
"I-I'm gonna!" You said, not being able to finish your sentence.
Gojo stood up, but continuing his relentless pace as he leaned over you, the squelching sound filling your bedroom.
Gojo's breath fanned over your ear. "Do it. Cum for me." He said and you shot your eyes open.
Your brows furrowed as you let out a loud moan.
Gojo felt you tightening around his fingers before a hot slickness poured over them.
"So good." He said as he removed his hands from you. He licked off your cum from his fingers as he watched you regain your breath, your fucked out expression earning a grin from his lips.
"You're so fucking pretty, you know that?" He asked as he leaned over you and began to align himself with your entrance. "G-Gojo you're so big can that really all fit?" You asked as you grabbed onto his shoulders.
"I made sure to prepare you very well." He said as he barely pushed the tip in.
Gojo began to breathe harder, "See? Taking me... so well." He said as he pushed a little more in. He was going slow, and he'd already stretched you with his fingers, so the pain was fairly minimal.
"You okay?" He asked and you nodded as you bit your lip. "Can I go some more?" He asked and you nodded again.
He pushed in what was left and bottomed out in you. His head dangled for a moment as he moaned. "Fuck you feel really good." He said as he looked down at your conjoined bodies.
"Ngh- Gojo I feel so full it feels so-" Gojo looked up, thinking he'd see your face in pain, but was surprised at your lust filled eyes, "-so good~" You moaned out the last word.
Your legs wrapped around his waist as you panted, "M-Move please." You begged and Gojo didn't hesitate as he moved back and then forward at a steady pace.
Your hands moved from his shoulders so your arms could wrap around his neck and you pulled him down, letting both your bodies press against each other. Gojo's muscular arms wrapped around your back as he thrusted in and out of you.
Your face pressed into the crook of his neck, both of you hearing the melodies of hot breaths and moans in each other's ears.
Gojo's pace increased suddenly and you cried out in pleasure as your head flew back. Gojo nibbled and kissed your neck sloppily as he fucked you into the sheets.
"G-Gojo you're h-hitting the spot!" You said as you panted. Gojo's arms unwrapped from around you and he took your legs from around your waist before he lifted them up, placing your calves on his shoulders. His hands grabbing on tightly to your plush thighs.
You screamed out his name over and over as he hit the perfect spot inside you. Gojo had never once felt so fucking alive in his life. Taking the woman of his dreams and fucking her right into her own bed.
"Gojo I'm gonna!" You cried out as you balled up your fists full of your own sheets. "That's it, cum around my cock. Fuck so perfect." Gojo mumbled as he felt you tighten around him, causing him to stutter in his pace as he felt his own climax just before him.
Your body felt as if it were burning, ecstasy encasing your entire being. You moaned out his name again as you came, and then you suddenly felt a warm liquid pouring inside you.
You both stayed still for a moment, trying to catch your breath as you slowly came down from your high.
Gojo pulled out finally, he hadn't realized how much he'd filled you up until the result of both of your arousals came pouring out of you.
"Wait here for a moment." Gojo said before he walked off into the master bathroom that was conjoined with your room.
You heard him looking around for a moment, opening and closing cabinets before turning on the sink and then turning it off a second later.
He came back with a wet rag, he leaned over and began to clean you up, you hissed when he touched your over stimulated area, and he mumbled an apology.
He left to the bathroom before coming back without the rag.
🌸🌸🌸
Gojo grabbed his pants he'd left on the floor and dug in the pocket for a moment before letting his pants fall back to the floor and plopping on the bed next to your exhausted body.
You turned your head, seeing him hold something shiny out of the corner of your eye. It was a crystal filled with many colors, almost like the colors of his eyes.
"It's filled with a small portion of my powers that will protect you. Wear it, and I will come straight for you when I sense you're in danger." He said, dangling the crystal from a black string.
You turned to face him and you lifted up your head as he reached over to tie it around your neck.
"I won't keep you by my side every moment, I know it's not possible. But I have a way I can protect you like I promised." He said and you smiled.
You gave him a small kiss as he pulled the blanket over both of you before cuddling up with you.
"Do you want to come back with me? To Jujutsu High?" He asked and you avoided your gaze. "How would the others feel? Knowing I abandoned them." You said and Gojo placed a hand on your cheek. "You didn't abandon them and they know it. Whenever they speak of you they only talk about you in the highest regard. What you went through that day against Geto was something no one expected, and they don't blame you for leaving." He explained as he stroked your cheek with his thumb.
"Then maybe... It will be alright if I return."
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scarletlights · 5 months
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Sneak attack!
*kat runs up and hugs both of them*
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"Guack-?!"
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"Whoop-"
As it turns out, that translates into bowling over Guardian and flomping onto Scarlet.
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tojikai · 1 year
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it was the way i hoped for toji and then rubbed my hands cackling when my wish came true and then instantly started squealing and kicking my feet for me 🥹😈
i liked seeing gojo’s perspective and while i can see now what the mind process was i still felt like he’s so dense and egotistical. i felt a little bad but it lasted about 2 minutes and then said fuck it we ball not enough to root for him so he can choke 🥰🫶🏽
baby megs putting naohoemi (i know what i said in the first ask about her being nice to yui but i was trying to be positive lmao but i couldn’t do it after reading it a second time) in her place and toji dealing the finishing blow had me smiling like the grinch and me monologuing about giving that man the sloppiest toppiest guack guack 9000 at the house 😤🤣
when n**mi said we can all fix it together i said out loud “i think tf not you trick ass bitch” bc i’m just so tired of her lmao pls exit stage left and stop inserting yourself the martyr complex is irking me
also wanted to mention that toji having money and being a present dad is so heartwarming and i love that despite mamaguro there’s room in his heart for reader (fix you put me through it at the time lmao) and the sims are so cute 🥰 since i’m a woc (black) i already imagined yui to look like the sim except for my skin and hair texture so seeing it had me like kai, your mind ☺️ but also imagining braiding her hair and putting beads in them 🥹😭
me 🤝 kai = same brain
i am highkey rooting for toji bc despite maybe seeing him as ooc may be a thought for others some part of me likes to think that he could have had that in canonverse had things been different which is why the characterization feels right for me. he’s so sweet to reader but also nasty 🤪😂 and the kids get along too so i am heavily invested in that. also when it was mentioned reader wanted three kids she already has yui and if toji is endgame then megumi is added. would she want more kids even if she had one with toji? i also want to see megumi accidentally call reader mom (despite mothergate with “n***mi”) but at the same time have both megs and toji being shocked but liking the new dynamic since reader isn’t taking anyone’s spot or icing out others
now idk if you’re going to do an epilogue for sundered or a different piece set in the au (and honestly i’m just down for the ride either way) but the way you explore the family dynamics and reveal the psychological aspects just tickles my brain so i’d like to see yui’s thoughts and perspective and just her being mommy’s little angel menace to society and delivering the karma to both of them. whether its naomi and satoru and his mom being ripped a third buttcheck bc she’s over it or just her reading them all for filth bc she knows the truth
i think to make it easier for my thoughts on each chapter i will do separate ones with slight commentary that way i don’t spam your ask box lmao (meaning i will redo reviews on each chapter bc i genuinely love talking about the fics with you! you make it fun and also you don’t get annoyed when i’m constantly standing outside your askbox or when i’m cussing out the characters on main lmfao 😂💕
i also think that ill do it for the rest of the series i’ve read from you just bc i know you’re an author im comfortable with talking to and ive been around even before permanent mark despite that being the start of reaching out. i think it’ll be fun for me and maybe to you but honestly maybe its just bc i talk a lot lmao and that we both are down bad astronomically for toji. also off topic bc this was a review and turned into a platonic confession/appreciation post but i saw you are a leo and it made my heart feel full bc my mom is a leo too lmao
- paragraph/theory aka paratheory anon
that statement abt how you feel abt satoru is just the way i feel abt him whenever i write. i just start scolding him like im not the one making him say or do those things, it's funny when i think abt it now LMAO and toji being ooc JDKSLSL that's true😭 but for me, it's bc i headcanon him as being really good w kids and family stuff. his life in jjk's just ...not the right place to show that side of him and it makes me hurt for him so bad bc where is he gonna put that soft side now😭 i enjoy writing him like that, ngl. and yui's pov would be so interesting and cute😭 depending on how it'll end, it'd be fun to see what she thinks and how she acts abt it as she grows !! anwww omg yess im a leo, that made me feel warm, paratheory anon, thanks so much 🥺♥️ your asks are always great reads<33
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wolfnlamb · 5 months
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Todays thought: I’d give Choso that “guack guack guack” any day any time.
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guack guack balls guack guack
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odisdad · 11 months
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hehehehehhehe daddy???
BUT SERIOUSLY WHY DOES HE LOOK SO FREAKING HOT?? 10/10 WOULD SMASH 💥 I WOULD CARRY HIS BABYS, I WOULD DO THE GUACK GUACK 3000 FOR HIM, I WOULD LET HIM RAIL ME SO HARD THAT I CANT WALK FOR DAYS, MONTHS, YEARS, EVEN DECADES!!!
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nattinatalia · 1 year
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Wait who did you give the guack guack to?
perfume guy?
Both?
Not at the same time duhhhhh lmaooooo
👁️👄👁️
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caelumsnuff · 1 year
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i know you've moved on from the 'all listeners are [insert whatever]!' discussion but i have got to tell you the funniest way someone decided to tell me that all the listeners (or at least ones with bonus audios) are AFAB was because lmao that when the speaker character (whether it was david or asher or gavin etc etc) goes down on the listener in bonus audios them practicing their oral fixations lol 'never sound at all like the blowjob sounds that happen in damien and huxley's bonus audios.' basically someone telling me 'those are cunnilingus sounds okay!!!' and lmao sure it doesn't sound similar (like none of the gagging sounds that happen in damien & hux happen in the others) but lmao it is the weirdest and funniest way someone has tried to pull a 'gotcha!!' on me about these characters sex and/or gender lol
This is genuinely hilarious. I swear for people who act like arbiters of sexual intercourse, they sure do know so little about actually doing it.
Do people know that you can give head to a person with a cock without like.... putting it in your mouth. And some of us don't make gagging sounds even when we do.* Like there are a handful of ways to give fellatio, you do not have to make slurping and suckin and gagging sounds to be sucking cock.
Anyways, sex sounds in erotic audios (that are 4A) are meant to be ambiguous, the best way to do that in regards to oral is typical licking and slurping sounds. You can't gag during head in an audio that is meant to be ambiguous about genitalia. Cock wielders are gonna be like "oh fuck yeah thats sexy", while all the pussy wielders are gonna be thoroughly turned off because they just had to listen to someone gag while fantasizing that they were getting eaten out.
All the lack of gagging sounds from those audios tell me is that those characters also give that gooseneck guack guack 5000. Like they got no gag reflex, they are sucking in utmost comfort.
*see tags
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gayometer · 2 years
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NINTENDO I SWEAR I WILL GIVE YOU THE GUACK GUACK 9000 JUST LET ME HAVE RUBY AND SAPPHIRE PORTS I NEED TO GET MY GRUBBY HANDS BACK ON HOENN.
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Hey I saw in a post you said your like Guan/Jack? Could you write a small drabble / one shot of them? They sound so interesting together !!!! Ty ily
    ◈ — @ anon  || Request accepted !
    Of course anon!!  I love crack ships, that’s my gift, my curse… And I love you too
    For this ship I have, the timeline is settled on the idea of Jack turning out to be the dragon of metal.     Kinda.
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It wasn’t like if he hated the idea, no, but it wasn’t nice to suddenly have your life turned 180 degrees.
Jack wasn’t a control freak at all, but he was a mechanic, engineer, artist, scientist… Things needed a certain structure in order to work properly. Even biology worked like that, universe worked like that, hell, you can’t harvest apples without planting an apple tree first! 
Oh god, no, there were cowboy’s bad influence and his peasant references.
Raimundo warned him about them and how easy was to get them stuck in your head after a while… He also warned him about Guan. Well, everybody did.
Even Jack, being a Heylin enthusiastic, knew about Master Monk Guan. But the monk’s references about him weren’t the ones he was expecting for, well, a monk; Guan was strong, skillful, precise and tough. Tough enough to seem evil.
It was because of those rumors that Jack was confused about the Guan he meet months ago.
Master Fung sent him to train with Guan after a lot of meditation, probably deciding was better for Jack to learn away from the other dragons, without the pressure of having to see how advanced they all were in comparation to him.
Also, there was the fact that Jack was a complete failure in everything related to martial arts and was obvious he needed some, focused attention in order to catch up with the others… World was dying, again, and they needed his help… Jack coudln’t turn his back, not now, he needed a world to rule it after all.
“Not like that. Your leg goes up –the other one Jack– yes, just like that. Again.”
And it was because of that that he was there, training with Guan. And it was also because of that that he was really confused about this Guan.
He expected to be woken up at three in the morning (like Kimiko said) with cold water and screams (like Pedrosa said) and train until he passed out of exhaustion and dehydration (like the cowboy said). But instead of that he found himself with a strict, yes, but surprising kind master monk.
For whatever reason Guan seemed to recognize his limits and didn’t push him beyond them until they knew he was ready.
He also gave him a bit more of freedom, let him wander around, offered to hear whatever Jack had to say without judging him, offering advice but mostly, just giving him the chance to vent to him. He also seemed interested in his skills with technology and wasn’t afraid of asking questions and praise his ability for all the things that Jack knew he was good at.
It was, refreshing. Exciting… Wonderful.
To know someone valued him for what he was, who he was, instead for how many kicks he could give in a single jump.
“How it was you decided to help the monks to save the world? ”
Jack’s eyes narrowed, remembering the events that happened after Chase took Omi and turned him into a warrior cat… To ditch Jack after that without a second thought.
“They needed me… They looked for the lost dragons, and that thing they used pointed at me… They need me to save the world and, you know, if I want to rule the world then I need it to be nice and ready to conquer.”
Guan smiled and serve them both tea. Night was clear and cool, stars were twinkling in the sky and the monk said that, even if he didn’t agree with Jack’s idea of world domination, was sure he was capable of that and more. Jack’s heart skipped a beat at the honesty behind those words.
“Why did you decide to train me anyway? I know Fung asked you if you wanted me but it wasn’t like he forced you to accept.”
“I saw your potential. You are a late bloomer, is obvious, but your potential is as big as the night sky.” Jack felt his cheeks flush and snorted.
“C'mon, I’m not that good.”
“Not yet, but you could be, with time.”
“But time is something we don’t have.”
Jack knew it, he heard it from Fung, Dojo and older monks, even Guan said it at some point, but Jack knew it too. He was a genius after all, a scientist. If there was something he was good at, was at reading numbers and analyzing data… And the information they had about Chase’s advances wasn’t encouraging at all.
“Chase was your idol, isn’t? ”
“Yeah… He was.”
“He was my friend once.” Jack tried to sip his tea but still was too hot for his tongue. Guan took it from his hands and blew on his cup to cool it. “… I’m sure you knew that.”
“I read about it in the Temple scrolls. In the books that tell the legend of Chase Young there isn’t a single mention of you, or Dashi.”
“Yes… It’s better like that.” Guan handed him back the cup and smiled at him, Jack smiled back, feeling a subtle something growing up between them at light speed. “Isn’t? ”
“The tea or the lack of references about you from his side of the history? ”
“You are too smart Jack Spicer.”
“Thanks. I’m pretty proud of that.” Guan laughed and looked up, to the sky; Was getting late and Jack was sure he was going to be sent to bed as soon as they ran out of tea.
“You remind me of him.” Jack almost spit his tea and Guan patted his back. “In a way… So much potential, a clear inclination to the dark side…”
“You knew Chase was going Heylin? ”
“No, no… Not like that. But you both have that in common, a clear tendency for troubles… We pushed him too much.”
“So you feel guilty about it and took me in to fix your guilt fixation? ” Guan laughed again.
“No, all that is in the past now. But when I saw you, I saw the potential, the mischief, and I knew I could help you better than anyone else. Because I dealt with someone like you before.” Jack decided he didn’t know how to feel about that revelation, at the same time, decided that Guan’s hand, still on his back, felt nice and warm enough to stay out there all night. “… Does that bother you? ”
“ —Not sure… I mean, is the first time someone compares me with a cool dude. That is also a jerk… A cool jerk.”
“If helps it, I believe you can surpass him without problem. There is something you have that many other people lacks…”
Jack looked up, at the strong jaw and the wide shoulders and wondered how would be to wrap his arms around them… Wild thought but, hey, they were in the middle of a war, he was allowed to have wild dreams.
“Unfounded overconfidence? ”
“Persistence and creativity. You don’t give up, and always find a way to succeed. With your intelligence at our side, we will solve this problem soon.“
Jack’s face lighted up like a lighthouse in the dark and they continued drinking the tea until, as he thought, Guan said was time to rest.
“… You asked me if Chase was my idol, right? ” Guan nodded, gathering the cups. “I used to— I used to have this huge crush on him… A bad one…”
“Chase is indeed an attractive person. He always were. Sometimes we wondered how it was that a monk like us could be so beautiful… There is no shame in that. Do you want to know how to grow out of it? ”
“No, I mean, I used to, not anymore. Not after— But I did.”
“Many others did, and many more will do, don’t torment yourself for it.” Jack looked at the temple, to the dark corridor that would take him to his room.
“Yeah, don’t worry, I won’t… But I think I got another crush…” Guan stood up and Jack followed, dusting off his pants.
“Is a sign that you are a healthy young man.” The monk congratulated him with a kind smile. “… May I know who’s the lucky one? ”
Jack shrugged and patted the monk’s strong arm, an excellent excuse to touch the muscles that he hoped wrapped him some day.
“Yeah, sure. You know him pretty well I think. I mean, there’s a ton of statues of him all over the temple.“ Guan’s expression changed so fast that Jack recognize every single one of them; surprise, shock, confusion, embarrassment… It was funny, in a way. On other hand, was terrifying to say something like that face to face. ”… So, see you tomorrow then.”
Guan didn’t say anything, nor followed him after that, but before turning to take the corridor that would take him to his room Jack turned and saw him there, still in the same place, following with his eyes. The monk nodded at him and Jack thought that maybe, maybe, something good could happen to him for once.
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pumpkinpatchpanics · 3 years
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Just tried to spell quack with a G and was confused as to why it wasn’t right.
Guess it bed time for me
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super-metroid · 6 years
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pronounce guacamole like whack-a-mole
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muselexum · 2 years
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He got that guack guack shlurp shlorp mega dick twizzy lizzy jizzy 9000.
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zeeroweenies · 3 years
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Baji deserves that good guack guack 3000 fr I love him sm
And does☝🏾! Wanna put a fruit roll up around that mf and go to town, bone apple teeth😌🤌🏾
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