#had a nightmare about my pastry final

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

ive never had a school dream before what is college DOING TO ME

[adelliet]

Marcus Acacius x f!reader

FORBIDDEN DESIRE

Summary: Your father's friend has returned to his hometown after a few years, and you finally met him, but despite your father's clear warning, you are dominated by desire rather than reason.

Warning: MDNI 18+, age gap (17 years and 40 years), unprotected sex (p i v), fingering, oral sex (f! receiving), handjob,

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You came to the kitchen door and waited for the guards to open it. When they did, you gently knelt down as a gratitude and then sidled up to the room. There was a table, full of sweet buns, grape wine and various types of fruit or pastries. On the end of the table sat your mother and father, laughing and drinking liquid from an iron cup. You'd bet all your gold that the liquid is a red wine, that your parents love so much.

As soon as they saw you, all their attention landed on you. You wished them good morning with a smile on your face and put one sweet bun on your plate. "How did you sleep darling?" your father asked with a sweet tone in his voice.

"Good" you answered firmly, but keep trying to stay nice and keep a warm smile on your face. This answer of yours may have been sufficient for your father, but certainly not for your mother. Mother senses are way more powerful than father's, as is known.

"Is everything okay sunshine?" this time your mother asked, bothering you from eating in quiet and peace. You chewed the bun and nod, not even looking at them. You were so focused on your plate that you didn't even have time to look anywhere else.

After your movement, which indicated that everything was supposedly fine, there was a moment of silence. The only thing that could be heard was the sound of cutlery occasionally touching the plate. An awkward silence began to spread through the air very quickly, and even the guards at the door began to chat among themselves.

The silence was suddenly broken by your father's inconspicuous cough, which was followed by a question you prayed you wouldn't hear for at least a day. ,,And what about men?" Did you find anyone that could be your future husband and follow my lead?"

Your lips left a long loud sigh. "Not yet father" this time, your voice was bitterly cold, you were obviously showing how you don't like this topic and how it makes you uncomfortable.

"Darling, you'll be a woman soon, your mother was getting married at your age and look where she is now!" Your father kept trying to cajole you and force you into marriage, but this was the last thing on your mind. "Trapped with a man?" you answered, making your father lost words and your mother's face cringe in anger. "I am not trapped sweetheart-" "Oh really? So you can go whenever you want wherever you want?"

You raised your voice a bit, but just enough to make the atmosphere thick. Your mother started boiling with anger, and you really make it difficult for her to stay calm and in her character. "Young lady, be careful with your words-" and just when your mother wanted to calm things down, you bursted out.

"You think this is what I want?" Live for marriage and forget what freedom feels like? You think I live just for men?!" You got up from your seat and slapped your hands aggressively on the table. "You're a woman!" You will never know what freedom feels like! The only thing you will have is your husband's safety!"

The words came out of your mother's mouth as easily as if she had been preparing for this moment years ago. They were sharp without any sweetness, making you froze in a place, not moving a single muscle. When you looked at your dad, he was just as shocked as you. Your mother still had that angry look on her face as she yelled at you the words that would wake you up from your sleep and haunt you in your worst nightmares.

After a few more seconds, your mom finally realizes what she has done, as she looked over to her husband. She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes, but before she could say something, one of the guards rushed into the kitchen with a simple words ,,He's here".

Your parents immediately stood up from their seats and looked over to the open door. Your dad looked excited and so did your mom. You were so confused. Who is he and why was his presence so quick to please your mother and father?

There were so many questions running through your head, and like everyone else, you were eagerly looking at the door, waiting to see who would appear. It didn't take long before you finally saw him.

A tall, large man stopped as soon as he got inside. His iron armor clung beautifully to his massive body, and the parts of his skin that could be seen were covered in blood. His hair was black and wavy, looking as fine as sheep's wool. His beard beautifully accentuated his masculine cheekbones and the gray particles only added charm. His look was frowning and stiff until he saw your parents.

At that moment, he raised his eyebrows and the corners of his mouth lifted. He called your father's name, deep husky voice that sends shivers down your spine. He opened his arms and your father ran towards him. They locked arms together and slapped each other on the back.

You just stared at them breathlessly, still unanswered questions drowning in your head. Before long you felt a gentle hand landing on your shoulder. "Marcus..." your mother said quietly as she kept her eyes on them. You looked over to see her calm face. "Best friend of your father..." now this was the answer you wanted to hear.

After the two finally pulled away from each other, the man's eyes landed on you. The smile on his face slowly faded away and he barely blinked. You held eye contact and even though you were standing quite far away from him, you could feel goosebumps rising all over your skin. His brown eyes looked so kind yet hungry at the same time.

"Marcus…" your mother finally stopped you and you looked down, coughing discreetly. Marcus also woke up back on planet earth and greeted your mother with the sweet smile he had before.

"We missed you" your mother said after she pulled away and held his massive strong arms. "You too, my favorite people" he said, looking into your moms face, unlike you, you couldn't take your eyes off Marcus.

It was as if the whole area became silent and everything was blurry, except for him. Your head automatically filled with million scenarios and you had to take a deep breath to breathe in the presence of this warrior. You scan his body and scars, pity began to flow through your body and you wanted to heal his every wound.

After a while your mother finally looked in your direction with Marcus and you froze in place. His gaze made you feel a vibrating feeling between your legs and you couldn't tell if you liked it or not.

"That's our daughter" your father noticed the awkward silence and decided to introduce the two of you. As Marcus made his way over to you, the vibration became more intense and you trembled like a bird. Marcus noticed your nervous attitude so he decided to, to calm you down a bit by grabbing your hand and gently kissing it, looking at you the whole time and honestly turning you on even more.

"My pleasure to finally meet you" he said as he let go of your hand and popped his chest like a proud lion. Finally? What does he mean? You've never heard of this man and you've never seen him, you would definitely remember that.

Marcus noticed your confused expression and immediately looked over to your father for an explanation, but he didn't do anything to explain it to you, he just decided to move on to another topic. As always.

"After all these years," he approached Marcus again, grabbing his strong arms and looking at him proudly. You kind of wish he would look at you like that one day, ,,…we need to throw a welcome soiree!" He screams so loudly, that the echo reverberated throughout the hall to the second tower.

Marcus was just smiling and you could tell it wasn't a sincere smile. Your mother immediately joined in and nodded in agreement. As soon as they finished talking, everyone started decorating the kitchen and making arrangements for meals.

You didn't want to oblige anyone, since you wouldn't be much help anyway, so you just snuck away to your room. When you walked past Marcus, who was having fun with your dad, his smell was indescribable. You've never felt anything like this from a man before. It evoked dominance, lust and respect, a respect that not just anyone deserves, but Marcus does.

As soon as you closed the door behind you and entered your room, the first and only thing you could think of was Marcus. How divine his body must be under all that armor, how strong his hands must be from all that warfare, how his fingers must be trained from his handling of the sword.

Just the image of him makes your legs shake and your stomach felt weird suddenly…weirdly good. You sat on the bed and just stared out the window, thoughts of Marcus still lingering and your imagination was much wilder than before.

You lay down on the bed with a loud groan and closing your eyes, as you bounce a few times on the mattress. You had no idea what was going on, with your head and your body. You couldn't even tell if you like it or not, the only thing you knew one hundred percent was, that these feelings are just because of Marcus.

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There were only a few hours left before the party started. All this time you tried to sleep and run away from all those new and scary feelings, but it still didn't work. You couldn't fall asleep and when you were really close to it, Marcus would always appear in front of you, even with your eyes closed. That's why you just lay there, staring at the ceiling and letting it all eat you up. When the hour finally approached, you were so relieved.

You heard muffled talking from behind the kitchen and decided it was time to leave. You opened your wardrobe and immediately knew what to wear. You've never worn these before, not because you didn't like them, but your father didn't like them and you know very well why.

They are way too revealing, but you think that he wouldn't say anything about them today, he wouldn't want to sink you in front of his best friend, right? With a devilish smile, you placed them on the bed and suddenly heard a knock on the door. You said open in a soft tone, looking at the door. Very slowly they cracked open and there was none other than your dad inside. He carefully closed it behind him and leaned against it.

You could tell by his face that he looked quite worried. You didn't want to anger him even more so you discreetly stood in front of the bed to cover that provocative dress. “Is everything okay father?” you asked, trying to figure out what was going on. He took a deep breath and looked at you. “I need to talk to you…about Marcus”

Your eyes widened a bit but not too much. It's quite understandable that he'll chat with you about him and maybe even explain why Marcus said he was finally happy to meet you, even though you've never heard of him. "I saw the way you look at each other and this must never happen" he didn't wait another second and spewed this at you.

You frowned at his naivety and the fact that you could have something more with Marcus. After all, you are still young bud, while he is a man of experience and has been through so much...yet this is not reason enough to erase him from your mind.

"Are you serious?" you asked your father arrogantly, folding your shoulders to your chest. "Yes, I'm serious honey. You know, Marcus is not the man for you" his voice sounded so convincing but you still didn't believe him. "You are the one who asks me about men every morning and when one comes along, you ban him?!" you raised your voice a little and threw your hands around. It just doesn't make any sense.

Your father looks down and took another deep breath. "Marcus Acacius is a warrior, a gladiator. He wouldn't have time for you and at the same time you would worry if he would survive. Also, his reputation with women is not flattering, even though he's the same age as me, he doesn't want to settle down. He loves freedom and fun, but you need someone who knows his priorities, do you understand?"

You were surprised by all of this information. Marcus definitely looks like a gladiator, but that's not the thing that scared you the most. His reputation with women? After all, he doesn't look like a man who would pay just for the experience and relief with a woman...or does he?

You tried to find the words to answer, but you couldn't think of anything. You had nothing in your head, just one man who seems like a poor old whore. Your father noticed your shock and even felt a little sorry for you. "Look, I only want the best for you, but Marcus just isn't the best" his words drove more and more wounds into your heart. It painted evil qualities into your imagination and even though everything seemed rosy after Marcus arrived, now is black and white and much worse.

"Do me a favor" your father slowly finished his monologue. "Stay away from Marcus" and with that he left your room leaving you completely devastated and destroyed. You felt tears running down your face but immediately wiped them away with your hand. A young lady like you can't cry, and certainly not because of a man. You didn't care about men until now, so how come you care so much about Marcus? You're not in love after all, are you?

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You walked into the main room where the party was being held. Everyone was already here, having fun and laughing, the music in the background pleasantly vibrated your eardrums and you tried to focus only on fun and freedom, nothing and no one else.

Even though your dad gave you a strict ban on any interaction with Marcus, you wore your sexy dress. After all, you have to use this opportunity one way or another. Of course, in that dress you immediately had the attention of almost all men and women.

It was eerily quiet for a moment when you walked in, even the music stopped playing. You don't like being the center of attention, so you tried to think of something to stop it. You slowly knelt down to greet and it really worked, the music started playing again and everyone was talking with each other. Sometimes, however, some would whisper in their ear while looking at you, but you tried your best to ignore them.

You came to the table with food and picked one grape berry. “Really interesting taste-” you heard a gruff wolf's voice from your right and quickly turned in that direction. Marcus looked even better than he did in the morning, he was well groomed, wearing a gorgeous white robe with gold accessories and his arms still looked so eatable. However, Marcus' words were stopped by another manly voice from the left, which was already familiar to you. "What do you think you're doing?!" your father was downright furious, looking you up and down. When you turned to look at him and revealed that Marcus was standing behind you, your father miraculously calmed down.

Marcus and you waited for your dad's next words. He was trapped, and that was exactly what you hoped would happen. You could feel how much he wanted to yell at you and scold you, but he can't show such an aggressive side of himself in front of his best friend, even at a party in front of hundreds of guests.

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Marcus, come with me for a moment" he said and turned around thinking that Marcus was already following him. He looked a little surprised but the mischievous smile still remained on his face. As he passed by you, he gave you a subtle wink and you had a close enough to pass out on the spot. Who would have thought that a mere wink would almost give out your knees?

You watched as your dad pulled Marcus into a corner and said something to him. You could just see Marcus' face expression and couldn't hear what they are talking about. Sometimes he looked at you, but you couldn't describe what was going through his mind or what your dad was saying to him, you could only guess.

"That dress looks good on you" you heard a familiar female voice next to you. Your mother was looking in the same direction as you, but she was smiling. Her compliment only comforted you for a moment as you were still paying attention to the two men.

You let out an exhausted sigh and popped another berry into your mouth. "Marcus is a good man, honest and strong. You would be really safe with him" your mother's words caught you by surprise as she was of a different opinion than your father's. "But dad-" you wanted to say that just the thought of you and Marcus being together was destroying him but your mother interrupted you.

,,I know. He is worried about you, after all you are still young and Marcus is too old for you. You have to understand him, he's doing it for you" she patted your shoulders and walked away to her friends. She left you alone again and you were even more confused than before. You didn't know what to think about all this. Everything started to be suddenly too loud, the music and people's conversation gave you a headache and you had to get away quickly before you passed out.

You quickly stepped outside into the fresh air, trying to catch your breath. You leaned against the wall and all your emotions suddenly came out. Tears fell from your eyes one by one and you couldn't stop it. You wanted to run away, scream, you just wanted to be relaxed and free, but these are apparently too big demands. You sat down on the ground and curled up into a ball, hoping no one will find you in that state. What would they think of you?

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You have no idea how much time has passed since you ran out. But you don't care as long as no one is looking for you. You felt good, the cool wind blew through your hair and pleasantly refreshed your skin. Still sitting on the ground, you had your eyes closed and tried to focus only on the nature and the sound of the birds, even though it was quite difficult since you couldn't hear through the music and the sound from the party.

Suddenly you heard footsteps and in no time you were back on your feet. Chest popping, back straight and chin up. You were waiting for someone to show up around the corner. You expected your father, who is sure to be furious, or your mother, who is calmer but still worried. To your surprise, it wasn't neither of them.

"Where did you evaporate?" Marcus asked standing in front of you so he could finally get a better look at you in that unique dress. You opened your eyes in horror and your words got stuck in your throat. "I-I…" you tried to create a meaningful sentence, but how could you, when you were standing in front of the most handsome man you have ever seen in your entire life.

He noticed your struggling and couldn't help but giggle a bit. "Why are you nervous little dove?" he asked so softly, that the tone of his voice went through your every vein. The weird vibrating feeling between your legs started again, and you couldn't help but put your thighs closer. ,,I needed some fresh air" you finally whined in a shaky and low voice, but still trying to keep your attitude and show that you are not so nervous at all, but the truth was different.

"Understandable" he nodded his head and the corner of his mouth lifted. He stared at you for a moment until he joined you. He stands next to you, leaning against the wall watching the scenery with you. Even though it was quiet, you loved his presence next to you. You felt the feeling of security that every woman longs for.

"You don't want to enjoy the celebration?" you finally broke the ice and asked with all your courage, but you were still too nervous to look at him. "No, although it's surprising, I don't really like attention" he breathed out and you were quite surprised by his answers. ,,Really? Father was saying something else...” you said the second part of the sentence more quietly but Marcus heard you, despite the soft chatter.

,,Indeed?" you could feel his eyes on you, but you still tried really hard to keep your cool and not look at him, even tho you really wanted. His scent was so irresistible and you lost yourself for a moment, before the long silence slapped you on the head. ,, "Oh yes, he said you like to enjoy freedom and fun, even...with women" you weren't sure if you were supposed to mention the women, but somehow it just came out of your mouth without you being able to control it.

He scoffed and let out a small laugh. Now it was the perfect time to look at him. You saw his head shaking, like he doesn't believe what he just heard. "It's a surprise that I don't know about it myself" you frowned incomprehendingly and waited for an explanation.

When your eyes met, your heart skipped a beat and you stopped breathing. You saw his eyes up close and they were so lovely, just like his hair, face, beard, body...you were so obsessed with him. Is it even allowed to be so obsessed with a man you barely know and your father forbade him? Definitely not.

"Your father said things to protect you, to make you think bad things about me" This was exactly the answer you were hoping for, that it was all just a fabrication and that Marcus was a good innocent man. "Oh" you said and looked down at your feet. "And apparently he told you to stay away from me, am I right?" Marcus touched your arm softly, just by two fingers to make you look at him again, and it worked. He looked like a sad puppy who deserved to be scratched.

You just nodded in agreement, eliciting a soft sigh from Marcus. "He told me that too..." he slightly pushed himself away from the wall and stood in front of you again, this time much closer. Your back hit the wall and you were pinned to it, as Marcus stood only a few millimeters away from you, your chests almost touching. Your heart rate increased and your breathing quickened, your cheeks began to heat up and the vibration was much stronger than ever before.

"He specifically forbade me to have anything to do with you..." Marcus continued and his finger ran over your skin, from wrist, to upper arms, to your shoulders, stopping at your collarbones where he just make small circles. This was your first physical interaction with a man, and despite how scared you were of it, you melted at Marcus' touch.

His other hand gently squeezed your waist, making you gasp a bit by the surprise. He pulled you closer to his body, now you were definitely touching each other and you could feel something poking you into your thigh. You wanted to look what it was, but Marcus hypnotized you with his gaze and you just couldn't take your eyes off him.

"But I can't help it" and with these words he leaned closer to your face, your noses were touching and both of you were waiting to see who would kiss the other first. The situation was tense, you didn't notice anything or anyone around but Marcus and his warm breath against your wet lips.

You took a deep breath and the movement almost forced your lips to touch his, but it didn't. You were still waiting, Marcus' hands were now firmly on your hips and he had full control of you, he could do whatever he wanted with you, and you would let him without any word.

You were frozen but you fought so hard not to kiss him. Why? Because you really liked this game. You like all of this and want as much of it as possible. But Marcus is patient enough and as much as he wanted to break the barriers too, he didn't, instead he did something much hotter.

He released one hand from your waist and slowly slid it under your dress. You whined at the sigh of his touch, his massive hands surrounded almost your entire thigh. You were still face to face, noses touching but still no kiss, just touches. Really dangerous touches. He didn't stop in his journey under your dress and continued higher and higher, just where your throbbing cunt was.

You groan and moan, but quietly to not let someone caught you. Marcus loves how his touch drives you crazy, but you still had no idea what came next. When he finally found your sweet spot where you needed him touch you so badly, he didn't hesitate any second and insert one of his fingers into you. You throw your head back, breaking your kiss game but you didn't care.

The pleasure was indescribable. You saw sounds and felt colors, you bit your bottom lip to silence your heckling and crying, but it still didn't quite work. The way he curled his finger inside you made you wild, your legs shaking and your mind went dizzy. You immediately dug your fingers into his strong muscles for the better posture.

,,Marcus~”

You moan as he sped up his pace. He didn't take his eyes off you. You looked so beautiful like that, so weak, so hopeless. Just when you thought it couldn't get any better, Marcus added his thumb, making tiny circles around your clit. You've never experienced that pleasure like this before. You fight for your life not to scream his name and to stay on your feet.

He was stretching your walls while provoking your wet tiny friend, which if you just lightly touch, it will wreak havoc in your body. You felt the urge to go to pee, to burst everything that is inside you out, you were just so close to your orgasm. You had no idea what was going on, what it was, or why Marcus was so good at it, but all you could focus on was him and his fingers inside you, that were driving you crazy.

You looked at him as a guardian angel who would free you from the tense feeling that had accumulated in you over the years. Marcus knew you were on edge, your hole wrapped tightly around his finger and your legs automatically joined together. He smiled and continued in his motion, till you finally came onto his finger. A load moan came out of your mouth and your heart was beating at an incredible speed.

You opened your eyes and looked at Marcus, all sweaty and tired but relaxed. You both laughed for a moment and you wanted to rest until you heard quick footsteps coming your way. You didn't even have time to thank Marcus when you saw your dad and the guards emerging from the edge of the wall.

Marcus quickly let go of you and stepped aside, but you weren't sure if your father saw you so close to him or not. What you saw, however, was an enraged father who was boiling with anger.

He watched the two of you for a moment before he ordered the guards to take you back and grabbed Marcus by the shoulder. "Dad it's not what-" you wanted to save it, but it was too late for any words now. "I'll meet you at the party" he said and walked away with Marcus. You kept watched them, until the guards grabbed your arms and dragged you back to the celebration. You tried to break free from their grip, but it was impossible.

"Next time, you should obey your father's orders," said one of the guards, and you looked at him concerned. You wanted to say something to him, but you were already at the place. They let you go and closed the door, at which they then stood.

Shocked by the whole situation, you just stood there watching all the people having fun. Before long, your mother came to you, hugging you tightly and stroking your head. "Sweetheart, do you know how worried we were about you?" with tears in her eyes, she still didn't let go of her embrace. "You barely noticed I was gone" you replied arrogantly and gently pushed your mother away. You felt sorry for her, but right now, fury was controlling over pity.

You angrily walked over to the food table and stuffed one berry after another into your mouth as if you hadn't eaten in a month. After a while, the door you came through opened and your father and Marcus walked in. They were both smiling, even though you knew they weren't just talking outside. When Marcus noticed you, he gave you an apologetic look before walking to the other side of the hall. The only thing on your mind right now was a question, why is life so unfair?

"Hey easy there sweetheart" a manly voice pulled you away from staring at Marcus and you immediately turned to the direction the voice was coming from. A tall man with brown hair and a beard, he looked slimy and even smelled like that. Just his presence so close to you bothered you. You ignored him and ate a few more berries before he talked to you again, "Are you in a hurry or just really hungry?" he laughed like it was the best joke of the year. You just rolled your eyes in annoyance and wiped your hands into your dress. "Actually yes, I'm in hurry. Pleasure to meet you" you politely avoided him and quickly rushed to the other door, the one that lead to your room. You quickly opened them and breathed a sigh of relief as you were in the hallway, only to find the man was following you.

"Come on angel, we barely know each other" he said and still followed you. "I'm sorry but I'm not interested" you still politely rejected the man again and quickly walked towards your room. But that didn't stop him. You don't even know how, but suddenly he was right behind you, grabbing your wrist and pressed you against the wall. You started to panic.

"Please let me go!" you begged and hoped he would stop. You had a million scenarios in your head of what would happen, what he wants from you or what he will do to you. But his look says it all, he doesn't want to just talk to you. "You'll love it, don't worry" he said with a sickening smile on his face and started to undo the waistband of his pants. You started to cry and you knew that screaming for help was futile. He could strangle you with his hand or just cover your mouth and no one would be able to hear your cry for help. This is not how you imagined the loss of virginity, this is not how you wanted it.

Just when it seemed like this was going to be the most traumatic day of your life, Marcus burst into the hallway. You both turned your head to look at him and you finally had hope. You smiled but you were the only one. Marcus worried face transformed into furious in a second, as he saw that man standing too close to you, and your eyes full of tears.

"Get lost!" We have our moment here!" The moldy sweaty man yelled at Marcus, thinking he was really going to let us go. Of course he didn't. "If you don't let her go now, you'll face the consequences" he warned the man as he slowly approached to you. As if every step of his made you feel more and more happy and relieved.

"Jesus Christ just leave us alone idiot!" Marcus ran out of patience and ran after the man. He grabbed him by the shirt and forced him to back up to the other side of the hall, directly across from you, where he pinned him to the wall.

"Now listen to me carefully, you touch her one more time and you won't have such a clean face after that, is that clear to you?" you watched Marcus warn the man and you really respected him. When Marcus gets angry, he can be really scary. The bastard didn't say anything, he just looked at Marcus in horror and didn't know what to do.

"Is it clear?!" Marcus shook him aggressively and the man immediately nodded his head. He must shit his pants right now. "Now get lost!" he ordered and finally let him go. The guy didn't wait for anything and ran back to the door as he fastened his belt. When Marcus and you looked in his direction, you saw your dad watching you. Neither of you noticed him until now, you had no idea how long he had been standing there staring at you, but apparently long enough for him to change his mind about Marcus.

Your father came over to Marcus who thought he was in trouble again but instead of yelling he got a warm hug. Marcus was confused just as you were, but it was a nice picture to see them hugging again. After a while, your father finally released Marcus from his arms, admiring him with a smile. "I was wrong. I acted immaturely and rashly” came out of your fathers words and you were just shocked. "You are perfect for my daughter.”

With those words, you and Marcus smiled and you quickly ran towards them. ,,Are you serious father?” You asked incredulously, but your father nodded. "Yes, even though your age is intimidating, you can protect her and that's all that matters” You looked excitedly at Marcus and he looked back at you. "Thank you," Marcus added, giving your father one last smile before looking at you and kissing you without any warning. It was a long, passionate kiss that said a lot more than I love you. It said I want you.

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Celebration of Marcus return was over, and the two of you just couldn't wait anymore. You were in your room, lips glued together and small moans leaving your mouth. The kisses were so wet, hungry and full of lust, that you had. "From the moment I saw you" Marcus said quickly between the kisses, trying to catch his breath. During this he slowly forced you backing up until your feet hit the bed frame. "I wanted you".

He said before gently pushing you onto the bed, making you bounce a bit. You smiled at his flirtatious words before his lips touched yours again, both of your saliva mixing together, making an amazing tasteful fluid. His tongue pushing into your mouth so roughly, almost choking you.

His hands traveled all over your body until he finally found the buttons of your dress, which he immediately used and very aggressively removed them, almost destroying them. You gasped as the cool fresh air touched your naked skin and Marcus needed a minute to admire your body.

“Where have you been all this time?” he asked desperately and immediately lunged after you again, his male instincts running wild as he grab your breast and squeezed, making you whine his name really loudly. You were in holy heaven, every touch of his on your body turned you on more and more and just the thought of how he had made you feel before, drives you crazy.

"You've never touched yourself, did you?" he whispered in your ear while slowly driving his finger down to your hole. You couldn't answer him, just a quiet whine came out of you. "Don't worry, that's why I am here for" he said before he put a finger inside you, your back arching and you firmly grab the pillows on the bed.

,,Oh my god~”

You groan and look at Marcus, totally crazy about your moves. Your hips were automatically moving against Marcus' hand, trying to bring more friction. He did as your body wanted, and added another finger, stretching your walls and making your fluid leak a bit.

Your moans were a lullaby for Marcus ears, making sure that he is doing his job well. His fingers teasing the inside of you, the juicy sound echoed throughout the room. But suddenly, he stopped and pulled out his fingers from you. You sighed at the loss, confused and overwhelmed. You looked at Marcus, watching him what he is doing. He knelt in front of the bed with a devilish grin on his face and moved you closer to him. More specifically, your vagina closer to your face.

“W-what are you doing?” you asked, leaning your elbows on the bed so you could see Marcus over your body. "Relax, trust me" he said and you did. You really trust Marcus, and definitely after he stood up for you. No one, no man, no human ever did something like that for you. You respect him a lot, but even more now that he's sticking his tongue inside you. You suddenly winced and grunted. His wet tongue entered into you so lightly, it was like a natural lubricant.

Instinctively, you grabbed Marcus's wavy hair and tugged on it as he slid his tongue in and out of you, making you whine his name. He kept his eyes on you, watching you as his victim, which you were in this situation. He held your hips so you wouldn't move too much and have the full experience as it should be.

His nose bumping into your clitoris from time to time, making your vision blurry. You heard the ringing for a moment and all your senses stopped. The only thing you could feel was Marcus's tongue inside you, touching you that spongy spot, which is making you getting close to realise.

After a few more movements of Marcus' tongue inside you, you couldn't take it anymore and you came right into Marcus' mouth. You gasped, trying to catch a breath as your legs shook. Marcus drinks all of your juices and you ride the orgasms off by his big nose.

You close your eyes, trying to calm yourself and your body down, while Marcus stands up from his position and gets on top of you. He knew how tired and exhausted you are, so he wanted you to catch a little break. He was giving you sweet little kisses all over your body and most often on your tummy, making you laugh a little. "Relaxed?" he asked and you jerked your head up to look at him. "There is more?" you asked in shock and Marcus just smiled at your innocence.

He nodded and crawled more up, so that he was face to face with you. His muscular body covered you all over, his scent tickling your olfactory cells. You just caressed his face. You felt his beard gently scratching you against your palm. It didn't hurt, on the contrary, it was pleasant.

“Are you ready for true passion?” He hummed and you looked at him in shock. You probably knew what he was pointing out, but you still weren't sure. You nodded your head a little apprehensively, but Marcus immediately calmed you down with a passionate kiss.

It wasn't long before Marcus' clothes were on the ground. You didn't care where, the main thing was that it was gone and you could finally feel his hot body on you. You couldn't help it and your hand traveled all over his body, your brain trying to remember every part of him, muscle, abs or just mole. He was perfect.

As the two of you kept touching yourself with hands, you felt something really big poking your inner thigh, dangerously close to your core. You slightly and gently moved Marcus away from you to take a look, what is it that provokes you so much. Your eyes nearly fell out of their sockets at the sight of Marcus' cock. He was big, massive and literally begging to fuck you already.

His precum already leaving from his pink tip, his veins were really filled and all you wanted to do was touch him, which you did without permission. You gently touched him with your fingers and Marcus immediately responded with a soft exhale. "Careful" he warned you, watching your hand on his penis. You took Marcus's warning to heart and followed his veins really gently with your index finger.

"You know what to do?" another heavy exhale from his lips, and you stopped to look at Marcus's face. You shook your head, a little afraid that he would laugh at you, but that didn't happen. Instead he took your hand and helped show you how. He carefully covered your hand and forced you to wrap yours around his cock. Your touch really turned him on but he had to hold back. "That's it, now you're gonna do this" he started moving your hand slowly, up and down with a slow pace. You quickly check Marcus face, that was squeezed and his teeth were dug into his lower lip.

"Perfect, clever girl..." he whine softly and throw his head back. You continued in the motion that he shows you, really focused while checking his face from time to time. You could tell that he likes it, but you wanted him to love it. You decided to speed up a bit and wrap your hand more tightly around him. He moaned your name, gods name and just sweet things you couldn't even register. One of his hand was on your waist, squeezing it, making you jump a bit.

"Oh my..." he moaned, digging his fingers into your skin while his lap was rocking against your hand. "Fuck!" He screamed and reached his climax, spraying a white gooey liquid all over your stomach. You were horrified but in a good way, you liked these new things you were exploring more and more.

After Marcus finally came to his senses, he smiled at you and stroked your cheek. "You learn fast little dove" you giggle by that cute nickname and your cheeks were so hot suddenly. "But we are still not done yet" and with these words he slowly began to insert his cock into you. You knew it was big but no one prepared you for this pain. But Marcus was a respectful man and always waited for the pain to pass and then he continued. This was repeated a few times until he was finally fully inside you.

He kept saying nice things to you to calm you down mentally and physically and it really helped. When he was 100% sure that you were fine and ready, he slowly began to move his hips back and forth. The pain immediately turned into pleasure, his cock slightly brushing your folds and it make you wanted more. You started moving your hips along his, giving him a clear sign that you are ready for more. Therefore, he quickened his pace and his emphasis as well.

His balls were clapping against your ass, the juice sound started being loud again but not as loud as your moans and gasps. You clawed at Marcus's back with your fingernails, they must left a bloody mess. Marcus was squeezing your hips so hard that he was sure to leave some bruise there, but neither of you cared.

He was stretching you so hard, finding and hitting that sponge spot again, and you immediately knew you won't last long. You felt so tight, like someone was strangling you down there and in your lower abdomen until Marcus exploded and rammed deep into you all the way to his balls. This was your last straw and just seconds after his orgasm you reached it too.

A few dirty words were exchanged until Marcus collapsed next to you. Both of you were tired, exhausted, sweaty and struggling to catch your breath. You felt amazing, this was the best thing you could ever experience and you can thank Marcus for that.

You turn your head towards him, his eyes were closed and his nostrils big. He was sleepy already but you weren't surprised, you were also ready to fall asleep. You crawled closer to Marcus, waking him up a bit. He immediately assumed his position as a caring partner and covered you both with a blanket. He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer to him and you purred appreciatively. "You're amazing darling" he whispered and placed a soft kiss into your hair. If this is the security that your father was talking about, then you have more than enough.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

[hearts4maddison]

Hands off!

| Lando Norris x Reader.

- Pairing: Lando Norris x Fem!Reader - Warnings: None Just fluff and some kissing and Lando being a pr nightmare plus not being able to keep his hands off. - Summary: After announcing your relationship to public You make your first appearance in the paddock and lando can’t seem keep his hands of you after countless warnings

Note: i just thought of this idea so idk if it’s any good and god this was sooo long to write.This isn’t the best so it might just be rubbish mind the spelling. (also wth was McLaren on for the Hungary Gp because the strategy’s were not it??)

—————————————

| F1Wags_updates444

Liked by: Mclaren, KikaGomes and 169,897 Others.

Caption: Y/n Y/l/n makes her first appearance in the paddock after going public with mclaren driver Lando Norris!

View all comments:

| user77: Her outfits are popping off > mclarenforever: Fr tho i’m going to need that dress!

| LN4_4: I don’t believe lando was able to pull her?? > Pastry-man: he had to have done some witchcraft icl. > User10: 😭😭

| F1Lover22: already my favourite wag. > user16: I need her wardrobe asap!

————————————

Nervous? That was understatement. of course you were nervous despite being public this was your first time in the paddock in front of cameras news reporters so yeah you were nervous.

Although your nerves were soon soothed as Lando Placed a gentle arm around your waist pulling you in closer to him before he leaned in giving a soft peck on your lips before Mumbling.

“..You gonna be okay?” He asked softly against your lips.

“yeah..i think?” you responded a hint of nervousness in the tone.

“be honest y/n? if your not comfortable-”

“it’s fine..I’m fine just a bit nervous you know!” you admit nervously.

“Nervous huh? well you do know i know a way to calm nerves” Lando says a small smirk planted on his face.

“..Nu uh! don’t even think about it!!” You respond trying to escape his grip but instead he tightens his grip on you planting soft kisses all over your face.

————————————

Walking into the paddock felt surreal. You couldn’t help but feel a tad bit overwhelmed by the sounds of media taking photos and videos but also fans screaming their heads off to get noticed by the drivers who walked by.

Lando walked close to you his hands tightly intertwined with yours giving you a reassuring squeeze which gave you a sense of security and comfort.

Lando’s hand remained tightly clasped onto yours as you walked through the paddock towards McLaren’s garage as media took photos of you two from every angle they could get.

everyone in the mclaren garage was welcoming giving a smile which made the nervousness slowly fade away making you feel much better.

Lando led you to his teammate Oscar piastri who was on his own sat down you had brief idea on who oscar was because lando would talk about him when he would get home from a race but you’d also see him on Tv.

“..Lando’s finally bought his girlfriend that he can’t shut up about?” Oscar said with a teasing smile.

“..jealous osc?” Lando says in a jokey tone.

“Nope i have my own girlfriend that i love very much” oscar responds a smile planted on his face.

“Fair enough”

“Lando doesn’t stop talking about you he’s practically whipped for you.” Oscar says while laughing as he looks at you.

A faint blush forms on your face at oscar’s comment about lando being whipped for you.

“shy are we now?” Lando teases as he kisses the side of your forehead.

“..No!” You responded quickly hiding your face.

“Sure..sure” Lando says while rolling his eyes playfully.

“get a room!” Oscar says laughing looking away from the both of you.

——————————

Lando had been very very attached to you he would either be by your side holding your hand,kissing you,or just holding you in his arms for the whole day he had even been given a warning to calm down on the PDA by Zak Brown but that still didn’t stop him.

“..Lando you have to go do media!” you say trying to pry him off you.

“No!” Lando mumbles still not letting go of your waist.

“Lando you have” you instructed.

“i know but i don’t wanna when i can stay here with my beautiful girlfriend?”

“baby you have to go!” you say softly looking at him.

“fine..fine!” he said reluctantly pulling away from you.

“..thank you” You say while fixing your outfit.

“Kiss?” he says while pointing to his lips.

“..your like a baby” you say while giving him a quick peck on the lips and he walked away with a grin on his face like a kid that finally got the sweets he wanted.

————————

once lando had gone to do his pre race interview you watched him from a distance and every so often you found yourself making eye contact with him making him smile like a little kid.

“…so lando rumours say you’ve bought a special someone to the paddock.” the interviewer brings up.

“Yup my girlfriend y/n” he says with a smile on his face.

“and i’ve heard that you’ve not been able to keep your hands off her?” The interviewer says with a laugh.

“i mean you can’t blame me my girlfriend is sexy?”

“Lando!” His Pr manger says.

“what it’s true?” he says with a sheepish grin.

————————————

i rushed it towards the end! this might be really bad but also i didn’t not re read this so i don’t know if the spelling is messed up!

[cayleeuhithinknot]

❛ 𝑺𝑴𝑶𝑲𝑬𝑫 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲𝑬𝑫 𝑨𝑾𝑨𝒀 𝑴𝒀 𝑩𝑹𝑨𝑰𝑵 ❜

𝒊𝒏 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉. . .you hit up your dealer to get your mind off of your shitty day. but, he has another idea to make you forget.

cw: SMUT, dealer!chris, mentions of smoking, praising, use of pet names and y/n, oral (fem receiving), unprotected sex, p in v, not proofread. . .(im sorry)

requested here by anon: 🤍!

-ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛--ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛-

your day today was absolutely unfathomable. it all started this morning. your curly hair was just not cooperating with you. random pieces curled in a different way than others, and some had straightened themselves out over night. on top of that, it was incredibly frizzy no matter what you did. so, you just pulled it back and got into your car for work.

you worked in a family owned bakery down town, which was usually pretty relaxed. but today? no. on your way to work, of course, you made a right turn and heard an odd hissing noise outside of your car.

you pull over in a random church parking lot and hop out of your car, walking over to the right side. surprise surprise, you had a flat tire. “are you fucking kidding me..?” you mumble to yourself, walking back over to the driver’s side to grab your phone. but, of course, you had to stub your toe on the tire.

calling the mechanic and asking for just a quick pump of air was a disaster as well. your dad is good friends with the local mechanic, who usually gives you no problems and even gives discounts. but, it seemed today he was just having a bad day. you sat in the smoldering heat of your car, which wasn’t even on or blowing air conditioning, because you’d ran out of gas and you didn’t want to drain the car battery.

the mechanic finally arrived, luckily having a can of gas in his truck. he got to work, filling your tire back up and feeding the gasoline to your car. but then, he told you what the fee would be. you felt like curling up right there on that dirty pavement, but obviously you didn’t. you just agreed to pay it before the deadline and got back into your car with a sigh.

work was fine. for the most part. your shift was from 7am to 5pm, a couple breaks in between. but, you usually stay until around 9 after you clock out just to help out your dad. at around 1:30, 10 minutes after you got back to work after your lunch break, a lady with 2 kids walks in. the woman seemed to be about 40 and both of her kids were definitely below 10.

“hi, i need two bear claws and a danish.” the lady demands. obviously, you’re taken aback by her tone. this lady didn’t even specify what kind of pastry she wanted. “uhm, okay! what kind of bear claw and danish?” you ask kindly, your customer service voice making an evident appearance. “i just want two bear claws and a danish. your job really isn’t that hard,” she pauses to narrow her eyes at your nametag, slightly adjusting her glasses. “y/n.”

you close your eyes, taking a deep breath and then opening your eyes just to see the lady’s face again. great. this wasn’t a nightmare. “ma’am, do you understand what i’m asking?” you ask, trying to keep your voice calm and steady. the woman sneers at you. “don’t call me ma’am, it makes me feel old! and i just want two bear claws and a danish, damnit!”

your eyes widen at her demeanor change. you glance over at her children, who are arguing loudly—annoyingly. you finally realize you’re gonna have to spell it out for her. “miss, we have apple cinnamon bear claws as well as almond butter bear claws. as for the danishes, we have cream cheese and strawberry cream cheese flavors. which would you like?” you ask, giving her a tight-lipped smile.

“obviously, i want the apple cinnamon and cream cheese! god, you young people are so clueless.” she shrieks. you flinch slightly at the annoyingly loud sound of her annoying voice. you nod slowly, grabbing a brown paper bag from the counter behind you. you stuff the contents of her order with tongs into the bag carelessly. gripping the bag, you ask yet another question, ready for this lady to take her ass on out the door. “$7.89, cash or card?”

“card, obviously. do i look like the type of person to be paying with cash?” the lady rolls her eyes, whipping her card out of her red wallet, waving it in her face. you rip the card from her hands, swiping it. it approves, and you place the card on the counter, pushing the paper bag across the counter to her. “have a nice day.” you mumble, and the woman just glares at you as she exits the store.

to top off your day, when you got home, you accidentally knocked one of your favorite perfume bottles off of the counter, smashing it and causing it’s contents to ooze across the tile floor. you curse yourself, cleaning up the glass and the scented liquid. you open your nightstand drawer, fully ready to go on your back porch to smoke. only to realize, you were out of literally everything.

now, you were gonna have to call your plug and ask for more. he’s gonna think you’re crazy asking for shit at only 10pm. you plop yourself down onto your bed, pulling your phone out of your pocket. opening the contacts app, you take a deep breath, trying to ground yourself. the phone rings a couple of times before he finally picks up.

“hello?” chris speaks. it was clear he wasn’t fully..sober at the moment. “uhm, hey,” you greet. things were casual between you two. or, they were supposed to be. there was obvious tension, but neither of you ever addressed it of course. “oh, hey angel. what’s up?” chris asks, and you can practically hear his lousy grin. angel. he’s always called you that. which was weird, because you were definitely no angel.

“can you bring some shit over? you don’t have to stay, i’ve just had such a long—“

“of course, angel. be there in 15.” was all you heard from the other line before the call ended. well, at least you were getting what you wanted.

30 minutes later, there’s a knock on your front door. fifteen minutes my ass, you thought. you scramble over to the door, ripping it open. you’re met with chris’ face. his red eyes, his tired expression. yeah, he was definitely high. you gesture to the open room behind you and he steps inside. chris nods, dropping the bag into your hands. it feels…oddly light.

“chris, how much did you bring? this is so light,” you question skeptically. chris just stuffs his hands in his pockets. you open the bag. it’s completely empty. “really? what was the point of even coming if you’re not gonna bring anything?”

“y’know, there’s like..other ways..” he mumbles. you cock an eyebrow at his words. “what?”

“like..other ways to get the same effect being high gives you. other ways to make you forget for a little.” he explains, shrugging like it was obvious. you didn’t like how cryptic he was being.

“what are you talking about?”

“sex.”

your eyes widen at the change in his demeanor. “what..?” you mutter. chris scratches the back of his neck. “sorry..i shouldn’t have said that. i—i know you don’t want to do that, im sorry, fuck-“

“chris,” you chuckle slightly. in all honesty, you were glad he’d finally said something. the tension had been gnawing at you for..well, a while now. “it’s okay. you’re completely wrong.”

chris tilts his head to the side like a confused puppy. “wrong? wrong about what?”

“about me not wanting to do that,” you mumble. chris’ eyes widen. “w—wait, really?”

“yes, chris.”

“h-holy shit, angel..” chris stammers, his pants already seeming to grow tighter. “well then..you tryin’ to relieve some stress?” he asks, his usual cocky grin starting to paint over his face. “absolutely.”

at your words, chris immediately grabs your arm and pulls you toward your bedroom. of course he’d memorized where your bedroom is even after only being to your house a couple of times. words couldn’t describe how much he’d wanted this. yeah, you liked him—a lot, but he craved it more than you ever knew he could.

reaching your bedroom, chris pushed the door shut and pushed you down onto the bed. he wasted no time crawling on top of you, pinning you down. “you’re bold today, aren’t y—“ you start, but you’re cut off by chris smashing his lips into yours. this wasn’t like any kiss you’d ever had. it was full of fire, passion, desire.

you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer to you. chris slipped his tongue into your mouth, running it along the roof of your mouth. you weren’t exactly sure how long the makeout had lasted; you were so caught up in the moment.

chris captured your bottom lip between his teeth as he pulled away, slightly grinning. he dips his head down to your collarbone, placing open, wet kisses along them. he slides off your baggy crop top, admiring the sight of your chest, as you weren’t wearing a bra. “so pretty, baby.”

chris massages your tits, leaning forward to take one of your nipples into his mouth. he sucks on it, rolling the other one between his fingers, making you shiver and squirm. his actions cause a moan to slip from your lips, arching into his touch. chris chuckles, pushing your stomach back down onto the bed.

he trails sloppy kisses down your chest and stomach, eventually reaching your clothed pussy. he kisses over it softly. “can i take these off?”

you nod frantically, eliciting a chuckle to escape from his throat. he pulls off your shorts and panties at the same time, dropping them on the floor beside your bed. he stared at your glistening folds in absolute awe. he leans closer, the heat radiating off of you and onto his face. “you’re sure you want this?”

“yes, chris. please.”

“as you wish, angel.” chris mumbles with a grin, breaking the eye contact to run his tongue up your slit. you immediately arch into him, but he pushes you back down again, making you groan. his tongue circles over your clit, applying an unimaginably pleasurable pressure. he hooks his arms around thighs, spreading them further.

he brings his tongue down to tease your entrance before plunging it in as far as he can. you let out a whiny moan, something you’d never done. it was becoming clear to the both of you that chris could make you feel things nobody else could. his grip on your thighs tightened as he licked and sucked. it was as if he was on death row and this was his final meal.

“chris, i..” you’re barely able to vocalize that you’re extremely close already, the knot in your stomach tightening by the second. “hm? what is it, angel?” chris mumbles against your pussy, his breath sending shockwaves through your body.

“..’m close, chris” you whimper as he pushes his tongue back into you, releasing a hand from your thigh to let his thumb rub circles on your clit. you let out an almost pornographic moan at the motion. the string is about to snap, fraying at the edges. you were so close, but you wanted to savior the moment, so you were pushing it away.

“stop fighting it, angel. let go f’me.”

he didn’t have to tell you twice. at his words, you finally allow yourself to stop holding on, absolutely letting yourself go. you slap a hand over your mouth to muffle your shakily loud moans. chris grabs your wrist, pulling your hand away from your mouth. you finally come down from your high, shaking. “we’re not done, angel.” chris chuckles.

chris pulls off his jean shorts, along with his boxers. your eyes widen at the sight of his cock. you’d never seen anything like it. you weren’t sure you’d be able to take half of it. “i—chris, i can’t.”

“yes you can, angel. i’m right here to help you.” chris assures softly. he pumps himself a couple times. “see how hard you got me?”

he hovers over you and you grip his biceps. he lines himself up with your leaking pussy. “you ready?” he asks, more of a groan of impatience. you nod, squeezing your eyes shut. “angel, it’s fine.” chris chuckles.

he slowly pushes his tip into you, hissing at how tight you are. “chris, i can’t!” you whine. “that’s just the tip, angel. you can squeeze me as much as you need. if you really really need me to stop, just tell me.”

you nod slowly, sighing in nervousness. he pushes in further, the burning stretch gnawing at you. once chris can you’re ready to continue, he pushes in further. eventually, he’s finally able to bottom out. “you okay?”

again, you nod. “pl-please start moving..” you plead. sure, you were nervous at first. sure, it hurt. but, it hurt so good. chris nods, slowly starting to thrust in and out of you, never taking his eyes off of your face. “y’look so beautiful takin’ me like this.”

he starts to pick up the pace, causing you to let out moans, whines, whimpers, literally any noise anyone could think of. chris’ groans and pants only turned you on more. you start to clench around him, feeling your stomach tighten once again. and once his thrusts started to get a little sloppy, you knew he was just as close as you were.

chris peppered kisses over your face and neck, slowing his thrusts slightly. “where should i cum, angel?”

“uhm—in..inside..” you mumble, barely able to form words at this point. “you sure?” he asks, a little nervous. “very sure!”

chris nods, his arms starting to weaken beneath him as he tried his hardest to give you rougher thrusts. “c—cumming!” is all you manage to get out as you come undone on his cock. “me too, angel, me too. did so good for me.” he murmurs against your neck. his hot, white cum paints your gummy walls as you both pant.

chris pulls out of you and plops down next to you on the bed, laying on his back. he pulls you on top of his chest, wrapping his arms around your warm body.

“think you still need a smoke?”

-ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛--ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛-

a/n: hi hi!! i hope you guys enjoyed this!! i still have a long way to go on my smut writing skills LMAO but i try my best😭 but yeah i know this was uploaded a little…late…but it’s okay😛

tags: @sturn-saturn @xysbree @emely9274 @sturniolos4life16 @pearlzier

[poeticpascal]

Trouble (Pedro Pascal x Rockstar!Reader)

Masterlist | Request here!

Summary: Pedro had never heard of (Y/N) (L/N) before his latest appearance on The Graham Norton Show. By the end, his assistant wishes it had stayed that way, and he wonders how it took him so long to find her.

Word count: 4.8k

Warnings: mentions of drug abuse (now recovered), allusions to but no specific mention of an overdose.

A/n: I am very nervous to post this! I've never written a fic about an actor like this before, so depending on how this one does lol, you may be able to expect more from me like this. Please let me know what you think, and don't forget my requests are open!

“And he used red this time! We were getting so worried that he wasn’t interested in all 3 primary colours-”

Pedro sighs, glancing towards the door to see if his assistant was coming back yet. No sign.

He turns back to the old lady who’s been talking now for what - 4 hours? 5? It felt like it. She was sweet, and he didn’t want to be rude, but god if he had to spend one more minute hearing about her grandson’s latest finger painting-

“So sorry I took so long! We’ll have to get going Pedro - your next interview is in 10.”

His assistant - Alicia - burst back into the room and Pedro was sure he could feel his eyes well in relief. He takes the lady’s hand, shaking it and giving her a warm smile. “Mrs Alderman, I’d love to hear all about Harvey, but I’ve gotta go. It was lovely to meet you!”

She smiles in understanding and clasps her own hand on top of his. “It was lovely to meet you too, Peter!”

Alicia snorts behind him, and Pedro gives up with a final, defeated smile before heading out of the cafe and back towards his car. He’d only wanted to nip in for a second, to grab coffee and a pastry, but then Alicia got a phone call, and Mrs Alderman started talking to him in the queue, and by the time they left his goddamn coffee had gone cold.

They clamber inside, Alicia pushing a few files onto the backseat as Pedro stares. “I almost died, you know,” he quips, half muffled as he takes a bite of his croissant. He hums at the taste, light and buttery; maybe it had been worth it.

Alicia rolls her eyes, used to his antics by now. “I was on the phone to the BBC. They’ve confirmed who you’ll be on The Graham Norton Show with.”

“They have? Who?” 

He generally felt nervous going on the big chat shows, especially with how in demand he'd been recently. But Graham had been so warm, especially for his first time on the show, that when they asked him to come back he'd accepted without hesitation.

And really, he was quite looking forward to it.

Alicia doesn't seem quite as excited though. She flips open her notepad, littered with delicate but hasty scribbles of various projects and dates, and begins to read out the names.

“Robert Downey Jr, he’s promoting Oppenheimer.”

“I'm gonna meet Iron Man?” Now he was nervous.

“Kate McKinnon. She's in the Barbie movie, I think.”

“Amazing.” He'd always wanted to meet her.

“And…” she sighs. “(Y/N) (L/N).”

“Who?” No seriously, who?

Alicia snaps her head up to look at him. Surely he didn’t not know who she was? “(Y/N) (L/N)? The singer?”

Pedro just shakes his head, unbothered. “Nah, never heard of her. She any good?”

“No, Pedro, that’s the point.” He cocks an eyebrow, gesturing for her to continue as she looks back and forth between him and her notes. “She’s a publicist’s worst nightmare. She’s the lead singer of this band, The Heartbreakers, they’re huge. Like, Taylor Swift-huge. But if Taylor Swift did heavy metal.”

“And why don't we like her?” he asks.

“Because she’s trouble. She’s had big drug problems, she argues with everyone, she goes on stage and pulls all these crazy stunts. She’s always in the news, Pedro.”

He can’t help but think she sounds like fun.

“Can’t be that bad, right? If she’s that famous?”

Alicia shakes her head, “she's famous, but that doesn’t mean she’s not dangerous. People love you right now, Pedro. I’m just concerned that if you’re seen to be… friendly with her, people will raise their eyebrows. It won’t look good.

He thinks for a second. It really wasn’t in his nature, this whole PR thing. He liked meeting new people, and listening to them, and connecting. Maybe not Mrs Alderman - and now he's thinking about that nightmare again - but, for the most part, yes; Pedro liked people.

And not giving someone a chance because of his public image didn’t feel right.

Alicia sees the cogs turning in his brain, so she flips the pad closed, giving him her full attention now. “I know it’s strange, but I mean it. It’s not a hole you want to get dragged into. Her fandom is huge, the media's obsessed with her, parents hate that their kids listen to her and kids love to piss off their parents by listening to her. I’m going to speak to them about getting you sat on the opposite end of the couch... I just want to make sure you’re not linked with her. Trust me.”

With that, he nods his head. He does trust her - at the end of the day, he didn’t even know who this (Y/N) person was. So what if he didn’t speak to her much on the show?

—------

“WHAT?!”

He had to pull the phone away as Bella’s near-screech pierced his ears. They yell again, something along the lines of “are you serious? Pedro, are you serious?!”

“Yes I’m serious, what’s the big-”

“Oh my god I can’t believe it! You’re going to meet (Y/N) (L/N)! Will you mention her to me? I saw her tweet once that she watched the show and oh my god I need her to follow me on Instagram-”

“Wait, Bella, wait,” Pedro rubs his thumb and forefinger between his brows, not exactly thrilled that what was supposed to be a call to calm his nerves the night before the show was now filled with so much rowdiness. “I don’t even know who she is! You listen to her?”

They gasp, and he just knew they were pulling a dramatic, jaw-dropped face on the other end of the line. “Come on man, I know you’re not the hippest guy around but you have to know who she is!”

He giggles, throwing his hands in the air. “‘Fraid not, Bella. I’ve no clue. I do know i’m not supposed to talk to her though.”

Now there was a real gasp, not the purposefully dramatic kind. “What? Pedro, you can’t not talk to her. You have to. She’s the coolest person, like, ever.”

Pedro scoffs, “what about me?”

“When you get sleeve tattoos and banned from performing at the VMAs, you might get considered dude.”

“She was banned from the VMAs?”

You know that feeling, when someone tells you not to do something, and you don’t want to do anything else?

Yeah, that.

“I’ll send you the link, it was so cool. She said she’ll be allowed back next year anyway 'cos they need her to stay relevant.” He giggles again at that, and yeah, he couldn’t deny his intrigue.

“So that’s why you like her? She's all rebellious and stuff?” Pedro chews on his thumb as he asks, the anxiety of tomorrow not quite forgotten, but listening intently as Bella rants on.

“Nah, I mean she is controversial, but I just think she’s amazing. She acts all tough and rock 'n' roll, but she's really great deep down. I went to see her band once a couple of years ago, and this girl fainted so she stopped the whole show to make sure she got water and was okay. She’s just misunderstood, man.”

“Is it true she’s a drug addict?” He's not sure why he felt the need to ask. Why he cared. Maybe it was just to build a better picture, or maybe because Bella loves her so much, and he cares about their interests. Maybe, he had a sort of… concern, for her. For this enigma.

They knew each other well, and Bella could sense Pedro’s interest. More than anything, they were just excited to tell him about their favourite singer. “She used to be, it was crazy. She’d go on stage high and everything, people really hated her then. But she’s been sober now for, like, a year? She talks about it a lot. This is what I mean dude - everyone remembers all those shitty things but I think she’s so strong.”

He hums in agreement, thinking back to Alicia’s warning a few days earlier.

“Do you think it’d be bad? If I talked to her?”

It was Bella taking a moment’s pause, now. “I mean… Alicia’s not wrong. She’s not exactly got the cleanest image a celebrity’s ever had. I guess it’s up to you to decide what matters most.”

It was quite profound really, and Pedro was reminded of just how mature they were for their age.

“The most important thing is that you give her my instagram handle.”

And just like that, the moment’s gone. He laughs, shaking his head and muttering “you’re a dick”, before falling into conversation about other things. He fully intended to look up (Y/N) (L/N) before he fell asleep, but the hours went by quick and soon enough he'd drifted off, phone in hand and tomorrow's nerves dispelled for now.

—------

Maybe this whole Graham Norton thing was a bad idea.

Pedro was tired.

It had been a long flight to London, a long drive from the airport to his hotel. And a long, long wait at the studio before they even thought about getting filming started.

He’d been in hair and makeup for a good while, and according to Alicia, it would still be another two hour’s wait until they got him sat on the big red couch.

Yeah, he was tired.

He steps out, the muddied skies of London painting a grey-cast shadow on his face, the frosty winds hitting his skin. It was nice. Different. Much harsher than the LA sun he was used to.

He looks around; it’s just him there in the car park, leant against the windowsill and letting his eyes drift shut. It’s peaceful, and if it weren’t for the rushing of the motorway that ran just beside him, he’d almost feel alone.

“Mind if I join?”

He jolts awake, startled out of his near-tranquility, facing the woman who’d crept outside through the same doors he did. She was casually dressed, far more so than the BBC staff he’d seen today; she must be a temp, or an intern or something. A heavy black hoodie swallows her frame, and he wished he had a similar one as his ice-cold breath fell into the air. His eyes draw upwards, and he thinks to himself just how pretty she is. (Y/H/C) hair is bundled in her hood, loose strands blowing messily in the wind. She has no makeup on, so he can see greyish bags hung under her eyes, her lips stained pink, a soft blush blooming over her cheeks from the frosty air. There’s a roughness to her, something harsh, and it makes her so utterly alluring.

“Yeah- yes, of course. Of course.” He offers a smile, and she smiles back, and his heart races.

He shuffles to the left, unsure of why he’s making room for her on the windowsill; they’re outside, he’s a stranger. There’s a bench not far from the door, perfectly fit for her to sit on. And yet she follows his movements, and leans against the porcelain outline of the large window, searching for something in her pockets.

“D'you smoke?” She produces a pack of cigarettes, and digs out a lighter from her back jean pocket. Pedro watches as she slips one of them between her lips, covering the end with delicate hands as she lights it, revelling in the taste and taking a long drag. He notices then her long black nails, perfectly painted and delicately holding the cigarette in place, elegant and weapon-like at the same time.

There’s a nonchalance to everything she does, and it’s enticing. She doesn’t look at him when she asks, or when she expels the smoke from her lungs, keeping her eyes set forward and undoubtedly feeling the weight of Pedro’s on her face.

He forgets he’s supposed to answer.

“Er, no, thank you. I’m being good.” He offers her a smile, forced as he tries to remember his own whereabouts, too entranced by the beauty and the charisma that fell from this woman in droves.

The two are silent for a little while, he can’t be too sure how long. He smells the smoke from beside him, sees the wisps drawl from her tongue and into the cool air, and for someone who considered himself rather charming, he couldn’t for the life of him think of something to say.

He doesn’t have to.

“What're you doing out here, then?”

And this time she is looking at him. They’re sat close, and his eyes meet hers with ease, warm and welcoming. He feels a little more comfortable now, like she’s a friend; her warmness makes it hard to feel anything other than at peace.

He smiles, bashful. “I’m working.”

“Working?”

He looks down at his shoes, rubbing them against one another. It was always a strange conversation to have, explaining who he was to people who didn’t know. It felt like showing off a little; more than anything, he didn’t want to make a big deal of it.

“Yeah, I, uh… on the show.”

She giggles, and it sounds so sweet that his tummy heats up. “I’m only kidding. I know who you are. The Last Of Us, right?”

There’s a sincerity to her tone, nothing like this thick, false charm people try to use when they know he’s famous. It didn’t feel like she wanted anything from him in that moment. He nods, looking back up at her and his breath hitches when they immediately lock eyes again. Her lips are turned into a sly smile, cheeky almost, and he can’t help but grin back.

“I liked that show,” she says before taking another long drag.

“Thank you. That means a lot to me. Makes this fuckin’ huge press tour worth it.”

She laughs. Not the quiet giggle she gave him before, but a proper laugh, one that makes her eyes brighter and her nose scrunch up. Pedro laughs too, caught up in her, and when their chuckles die down they relax into a comfortable silence for a few moments before he turns to her again and asks, “how about you? Are you on the production team?”

She ponders her answer. It’s the first time - in the 10 minutes since they’d met - that she’d seemed to falter. Like she was unsure. “Yeah, you could say that.”

He didn’t push it. Maybe his fame was a problem. Did she feel overwhelmed? Or judged? He didn’t know - but a twang of sadness settled in his gut, and he wondered what to say next.

She recovers quickly, though. Stands back up a little straighter, puts the butt of her cigarette out against the wall, and faces him once again. “You seem nervous."

Pedro chuckles, nervously. “Am I that obvious?”

“Only when you scuff your shoes within an inch of their life and readjust your glasses every 10 seconds.”

“And here I thought I hid it well.” Cocking an eyebrow, the woman looks at him knowingly and tilts her head, encouraging him to go on.

“I always get nervous before these things... it feels worse this time, though. I just know Robert Downey Jr is gonna think I’m so weird, and then there’s this other lady I gotta avoid-”

“Who?”

She was abrupt, quickly apologising for interrupting him. He didn’t mind. “She’s like this... musician? I think. I’m sure you’ll know who she is. I’m awful at keeping up with whatever the kids are doing now. (Y/N)- (Y/N) something.”

There was a pause, awkwardly long. “My assistant says I gotta stay away from her” her continues, feeling a need to fill the gap. “Just doesn’t feel right to me, you know? To judge someone like that before you’ve even met them?”

He watches as she nods her head, deep in thought. She meets his eyes and nods again, faster, showing to him now that she agrees. She understands. He’s not quite sure how she understands, but he believes her; she didn’t strike him as the dishonest sort.

Pedro’s phone vibrates in his pocket, startling them both and they share another soft laugh. He grabs it, seeing Alicia's text flash on the screen - You’ve got a meeting with the producers to go over filming. 10 minutes. Ah shit.

“Everything okay?” There’s concern in her voice, and Pedro wonders if she knows he has to go. If she’s just as disappointed as he is.

“Yeah, yeah. I just - I gotta go.”

She’s definitely disappointed. He knows because her bright eyes fall the same way his did.

He’d never quite felt like this; like a magnet was drawing him to someone and like it would hurt in his soul to let her go. It occurred to him then, he didn’t even know her name, and he’d be damned if he was going to crawl back into the world of PR and publicity stunts and rehearsed answers without finding it out.

“It was nice to meet you. I don’t know if you- you want to get a coffee? Or something? After filming?”

The same harsh edge she had when they met, the one that had slipped and softened as they talked, seemed to have crept back as a once-sweet smile became that sly, cautious smirk. He couldn’t quite understand what she was thinking, what the cogs that so clearly turned in her mind were churning up, but he knew he didn’t care as long as he got to see her again.

“I’d like that.” Pedro sighs in relief, smiling again and sticking out an ice-bitten hand. “I’m Pedro.”

She giggles, offering her own hand and he stalled at the feeling of her fingers wrapped around his own. “I know.” She retorts, and he laughs, and just when she opens her mouth to tell him her own name-

“Pedro! We gotta go!”

Alicia shoves the door open, not even looking up from her phone which was presumably inundated with countless emails and phone calls, and Pedro sighs before looking desperately into the still nameless women’s eyes. She just smiles, dropping his hand and digging hers into her pockets. “Go on. I'll catch you later.”

He nods, swallowing and offering a small, regretful smile before pushing himself off the wall and following Alicia back inside. She huffs at him, speeding back off down the corridor and muttering something along the lines of “these goddamn producers”. He looks back a final time, to where the woman still sits in the windowsill. She waves, and he grins, unable to hide the childlike excitement her little gesture gave him before waving back and letting the door shut behind him.

—------

“We’ve got a fantastic show for you tonight, ladies and gentlemen. Let’s get some guests on!”

Pedro hears the roar of the audience, only a single wall between them and him as he waits to hear his name. He looks around the room; Robert and Kate are stood with him, chatting away at something he’d stopped listening to a little while ago. He felt better now he’d met them - they were lovely, so down to earth and genuinely happy to chat to him and hear what he had to say. It made him less nervous, and you might even say he was looking forward to this now.

There was no sign of her though. The singer - (Y/N). Alicia had scoffed, “typical,” just 10 minutes earlier, when there had been no sign. And she still wasn’t here.

“We’ve got the newly Emmy-nominated actor, best known for his amazing roles in The Mandalorian and HBO’s The Last Of us,” the audience’s roars got louder, “Mr. Pedro Pascal!”

It’s time.

He pulls his suit jacket a little tighter around himself, laying his palm flat against the bottom of his chest. With the other hand, he waves, smiling brightly at the crowd who cheered him on. Graham greets him, pulling him in for a hug and welcoming him back, before pointing him towards the end of the couch. Pedro gives the audience a final wave, mouthing ‘thank you’s and trying to express his gratitude for the love that filled the room.

Kate and Robert came next, shaking his hand and ‘introducing’ themselves again, despite the fact he’d already met them an hour earlier. A producer runs up to Graham, whispering something in his ear before darting off in the other direction. Graham rolls his eyes playfully, turning towards the audience and announcing, “we’ve got a late one!” The audience laugh, and Graham just organises his cue cards as producers usedthe extra time to prepare the camera angles and get the lighting right.

Graham looks at the couch, smiling with a wink. “Don’t worry - she’ll be here in a minute.”

“Is this (Y/N) again?” Robert asks, grinning.

“You’ve met her?” Pedro jumps in, falling into small talk among the four of them.

“A couple of times now yeah,” Robert replies. “I think she’s great, really funny. She's just… not the most put together person.”

They laugh, and Kate recounts her own story of having to wait on some celebrity or another, entertaining the crowd.

Graham parts from the conversation after around 10 minutes, holding a finger to his ear piece and nodding at whatever he was being told from the other end of the line. He stands up, smiling wide and turning to the audience, “she’s here! We have our rockstar ready.”

Cheers immediately erupt, and Graham turns to the guests to check they’re all ready to carry on with the show. Pedro nods, anticipation building as he spots Alicia from the corner of his eye, keeping watch.

“And don’t worry everyone, we’ll cut that little intermission out!” The room laughs. “Now I’m very glad introduce our last, but certainly not least, guest of the night. She’s the lead singer of Grammy-nominated band The Heartbreakers, she’s one of the most famous women in the world right now, and she’s only a tad terrifying. Ladies and gentleman, please welcome - (Y/N) (L/N)!

The audience becomes the loudest they’ve been all night, standing and yelling as the final guest takes the stage, and -

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

It’s her. The woman from outside, the one he’d been thinking about all afternoon. The one whose name he never learned. 

She looks different; she looks like the woman he’d been warned about. She looks dangerous. Where a black hoodie had hung from her shoulders, a black lace dress now clung to her figure and he could see the tattoos that littered her sleeveless arms. The bags under her eyes were gone, as was the pink on her cheeks; her skin was painted, perfected, sculpted with darker shades and glowing radiantly. Her lips were black and glossy, so neatly done that she almost looked like a doll. Thick eyeliner carried a smoky shadow across her eyelid and beyond, drowning the same (Y/E/C) eyes he’d memorised in black.

She was ethereal.

And she was his one, single instruction for the night. Don’t get involved in her.

She waves at the audience, smirking in the same sly way she’d done to him earlier; he saw more clearly that they were the same now. She has the same charm, same charisma, same allure and yet she seems all the more potent now as she strides across the stage in 6 inch heels and pulls Graham into a tight hug, like old friends. She whispers something in his ear, and he throws his head back with a laugh before she saunters to the couch, where the three guests stand up to greet her. She and Kate introduce one another with a kiss on the cheek and a warm smile, before she gives Robert another tight hug and they share a word that Pedro can hear now. “I have to stay here an extra 10 minutes ‘cos of you” Robert quips, causing (Y/N) to pull back and look at him with a cocked brow.

“You know I’m worth it, Downey.”

With that, she turns to face Pedro, and his breath hitches the same way it did when they’d first met. Her grin falters slightly, and there it is again; that honesty. She almost seemed like she was putting on a show, with her slow saunter and cheeky remarks, but there was nothing false about the way she wrapped her arms around him and looked into his eyes.

“My name’s (Y/N).”

He just laughs. He can’t help it. She makes him feel giddy. “I know.”

The audience’s applause dies down, and (Y/N) takes her spot as the star guest, and the first on the couch closest the Graham. He talks between them and the crowd, commenting on what a great line up they had today, despite certain delays, which has the audience howling again. (Y/N) laughs with them, shaking her head and pretending to cover her face with her hand, before looking up at Graham and saying, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry, okay? I got held up!”

“Well you have to tell us what happened,” Graham retorts, and they banter as (Y/N) recounts getting stuck in the backstage toilets. She has everyone wrapped around her finger, listening to everything she says and laughing at her jokes, and Pedro can’t find himself believing the warnings Alicia had given him. 

He remembers Bella, and how much praise they had for her, and he gets it. He sees what they see.

“Well you’re here now, that’s all that matters. We actually haven’t seen you for a while!” 

(Y/N) nods, her demeanour becoming slightly more serious. “No, it’s been a strange few months.” 

Graham continues, “the last time you were on the show was 2021. And obviously as most of us here know, you've had quite a difficult time since then, right? Tell me how you’ve been.”

She takes a sharp breath, and Pedro could’ve sworn she glanced up at him before she answers. “Well, yeah. I’m sure it’s no surprise to anyone that I was struggling with addiction for… most of my career, really.”

“‘No surprise’?” - Graham interjects - “you used to get high on stage!” It seemed judgemental, but it quickly became clear that he and (Y/N) had that sort of friendship, the kind where you can talk to one another so blatantly. She purses her lips at him, and he giggles, which makes her break the feigned offence and giggle too. 

“Look, man, that’s rock and roll.” The room laughs again. “No but seriously, yeah, it just got worse and worse until… well, you know what happened. it was hard. But I’ve gotten clean, I haven’t touched that shit in what, 8 months?” The crowd launch into cheers and applause, echoed by Graham and the other guests. Pedro could see how much it meant to her, how she tried to keep a stoic appearance despite the tears beginning to glisten in her eyes. She mouths a thank you, and he longs to skip right past Robert and Kate to be by her side, to hold her. She recovers quickly, something Pedro notes she seems to do a lot; cover her moments of weakness as soon as they start. Instead she sits up straighter and jokes, “I think everyone’s worried I’m gonna be boring now, without the drugs.”

Graham laughs, “I mean, you are known for being one of the more controversial artists out there.”

“If anything, I think being high slowed me down. I’m just gonna get worse, now.”

“Oh god, don’t say that,” Graham jokes, “you’re going on tour again soon, I’m not sure we can handle it.”

The audience cheer even louder at the mention of the tour, making (Y/N)’s smile grow wider. “Yep, new album, new tour. It’s all happening.”

Graham turns to Pedro suddenly, as if remembering he had three other guests to rope into the conversation. “Do you listen to this sort of music, Pedro? The Heartbreakers?”

And, shit. Pedro can feel Alicia’s eyes burning into him from off-stage, and he recalls her warnings about this very situation.

Don’t make friends with her

Don’t give the media something to talk about

Don’t ruin your reputation

And yet, her voice got quieter and quieter in his head, as the sound of (Y/N)’s laugh and the pierce of her eyes became all he could think about. The decision was pretty easy to make, really.

“I actually hadn’t heard of them, until today.” Graham chuckles at his reply. “But I think I’ll have to start listening.”

The crowd cheer, and the pair lock eyes for what could’ve only been a few seconds, but felt like so much longer. She tries to fight the way the corners of her mouth pull upwards, white teeth poking through painted black lips, but when she sees him smiling back at her she lets them go and drowns in the butterflies she’s so unused to feeling.

God, he was in so much trouble.

[throneofsapphics]

I've been thinking about poly!nessian & I have so many things stuck in my brain so here we go! just a few headcannons/scenarios

warnings: implied sexual content - nothing explicit, nightmares

Nesta having a nightmare

You brush the hair from her face, fingers running carefully through the sweat-soaked strands, Cassian quietly slips out to get a glass of water, careful to close the door quietly. "It's alright," you murmur, focusing on gentle, soothing, and steady motions "you're not alone nes." Shuddering breaths, before she sits up, taking the glass from him. Shuffling, you slide behind her, peppering kisses on her shoulders, Cassian's arm stretches over both of you, tugging his two girls in close.

"Running" the stairs with nesta

You get to the bottom, and convince her to carry you on her back the way up. For training, of course. Deciding to add an extra challenge, one to test her concentration, can reach around tease her, hand brushing around the curve of her breast, until she snaps, "keep it up and you'll be carrying me." You behave after that

Cassian does something to piss nesta off, except he can't figure out what it is. After 24 hours, he finally comes to you.

"Put me out of my misery," he groans, collapsing next to you on the couch. "I don't know what you're talking about," you press your lips into a tight line, fighting back a smile. He give you a 'cut the bullshit' look, and you sigh, "have you asked her?" "Three times. She told me I should know by now." He gives you what could only be described as puppy dog eyes, and you stifle a laugh "If I tell you, she'll know. Then she'll be mad at both of us." Cassian asks the house - an icy wind whipping both of you in the face, a remprimand. "It always takes her side," he grumbled. Glancing at the clock, Nesta would still be out for several hours, training with the Valkyries. "Come on," you grab his hand, tugging him to his feet, heading towards the balcony. "I have an idea for an apology."

Nesta coming home to her apology

Cassian's nearly brimming with anxious but hopeful energy, glancing at her with pleading eyes. Next to him, you're hiding a smile, she cocks her head, narrowing her eyes at you. Wordlessly, you grab her hand and tug her towards the dining room, Cassian following behind. There, a basket on the table - with an early copy of Sellyn Drake's novel, not set to be released for another week, various chocolates and pastries, and a few pretty flowers from the areas surrounding Velaris. She knows whose idea it was, but also saw each of your touches. You must've pulled several strings to get that book, she recognized the flowers - ones Cassian had taken one time, fiddled with her braid until they were woven inside. She takes the basket, "don't interrupt me this time," she warns Cassian. His mouth lips part, half in surprise, half in disbelief. You 'shush' him. Nesta's teeth dig into her bottom lip, and she tucks the basket under one arm, striding up towards him. Cupping his face with her spare hand, she presses a quick kiss to his lips, darting out of his way before he can deepen it.

You working a late night

Alone in the shop, you try to focus on your work, but the prospect of getting home to Nesta and Cassian proves distracting, as always. "Almost done," you mutter under your breath, filling out the dreaded paperwork. Three more sheets, and you'll be free. "With what?" You squeal, pen clattering across the counter. Cassian catches it before it hits the floor, but ink's already splattered on the marble counter. "Damn it," you huff. Maybe the ink will add character. Before you can grab the cloth to wipe it, Cassian's already there, pressing a kiss to your cheek, sliding around you, hand brushing along your lower back. "Thought we'd keep you company." Nesta's leaning across from you, one elbow propped on the counter. "Please tell me you brought snacks," you plead - an edge of desperation in your tone. Your stomach has been growling for the last hour. Her hand rises, a bar of chocolate balances between two fingers. She slides it across to you, fingers brushing against yours. "Here, love." "Fuck, you're perfect," you moan, teeth snapping a large piece, letting it melt on your tongue. The scent Cassian and Nesta's arousal fills the room. "I have work to do," you remind them. "Don't stink up the place." With Cassian hugging you from behind, it takes a bit longer than usual to finish up.

[a-court-of-fics-and-errors]

Keep Moving Forwards, Part 19

Azriel x Reader Fic

Summary: After finally deciding to leave your abusive and manipulative mate for good, you find unexpected companionship with Azriel, the Shadowsinger of the Night Court. As you navigate the aftermath of your traumatic relationship, you struggle to understand where the mating bond went wrong and contemplate your path forward, vowing never to return to the past.

Find other parts here: Master List

To follow this fic, follow tag "Keep Moving Forwards Fic" or comment to be tagged in future parts.

Content Warning: This story contains depictions of extreme emotional manipulation and abuse, detailed descriptions of direct physical abuse, and scenes of men hunting women with implied sexual assault. Please read at your own risk.

Word Count: 1.5K

Author's Note: This is a multi-part series. Unlike my previous works, this fanfiction delves deeper than just fluff, exploring complex emotional landscapes. As I navigate this new writing journey, I kindly ask for gentle feedback. The topics addressed are profoundly impactful, touching many lives with diverse experiences. Please be gentle with yourselves and others. Healing is a journey, and everyone processes it differently. Be kind to yourself. Take what resonates, and leave what doesn’t.

Please continue reading, being aware of the above content warnings, ensuring you are in a healthy headspace. Give yourself time to process and be gentle with yourself.

It must have been close to one in the morning when you finally left Titania’s. She stood in the doorway of the brothel, wrapping her skinny arms around herself as she waved you off down the cobblestone pathway back into the heart of the city. Your mind raced with memories, trying to piece together what belonged to Titania and what belonged to your mother. You had asked Titania if she had any photographs or paintings of your mother, but she had told you that when your mother left, she requested that all photos and reminders of her life in the city be burned. She feared someone would be looking for them and that keeping them would put everyone at risk. Titania had agreed and burned any photos of both you and your mother, save for one small drawing of you, done during the solstice, that she kept in a locked jewelry box. She had shown it to you, your eyes tracing the lines of your childhood face, and you were struck by how thin you looked. Titania had shared that this drawing had been done at the end of one of the bouts of sickness that had plagued you as a child, during which you had dropped a significant amount of weight. Yet, she had told you, you refused to stay in bed, always jumping out when no one was looking to play with the other children in the street. Titania had offered you the drawing, but after seeing the look of love on her face, you asked her to keep it.

You had invited Titania to come see you at the market the next day. Initially hesitant, giving excuses about needing to be around for clients, she seemed more willing when you mentioned Kai and your desire for her to meet him. 

Returning to the inn that night, you crawled into the soft bed across from where Kai’s father slept, curled up against the wall to avoid the draft, and drifted off to sleep.

______________________________________________________

For the first time in weeks, you dreamt, though it wasn’t a nightmare. Your dream unfolded as though you were walking through the streets of Velaris, your vision bobbing up and down with each step, an unknown gait guiding your movements. Musicians played haunting melodies that echoed through the night, and the lingering scent of pastries from earlier in the evening wafted through the air. You felt the winter night’s cold bite at the back of your neck, sharp and unsettling.

It seemed as though you were searching for someone or something, your gaze shifting back and forth, panning through the crowd. The people around you appeared much shorter, their faces blurred and indistinct. Wandering along the cobblestone wall of the Sidra, the same place where you and Kai had stood earlier when Sylvan approached, you felt an inexplicable warmth in your hands as you slid them into your pockets. 

You paused, turning to look out at the river. The moonlight glinted off the water, casting an eerie glow as snow fell softly around you. It was peculiar, as though you were reliving the evening, but this time, Kai wasn’t with you. A sense of unease settled over you, the kind that prickled at the edges of your consciousness without revealing its source. 

Nothing particularly exciting happened; you simply wandered through the crowd, seemingly searching for something or someone elusive. As you made your way through the streets, you passed the inn where you were staying. Looking up, you seemed to stare directly at the window of your room, a chill running down your spine. The scene was familiar yet distorted, and an inexplicable sense of dread began to creep in, leaving you with the unsettling feeling that something was watching you, just out of sight.

______________________________________________________

With a jolt, you opened your eyes to the sound of the room door shutting softly. You shifted to look up, seeing Kai at the foot of the bed, unlacing his boots, leaning slightly too far forwards and having to catch himself on the footboard. He smiled at you. “Hi,” he whispered, his voice a warm, soft note in the quiet room.

You sent him a soft smile back, laying your head back down onto the pillow. You listened as Kai stripped off some of his clothes, throwing them over the back of the armchair with a thudding flop. His father didn’t even stir in his sleep as Kai pulled back the sheets of the bed. The cold draft hit you before Kai settled in, his strong, thin frame curling around yours, his knees finding their place behind yours. You lifted your head slightly to allow his arm to rest beneath it as he leaned in and took a deep breath of your scent, letting out a satisfied sigh. You turned your head to look at him. Kai gave you a sleepy smile, and you flipped entirely to face him. His eyes were shut, but you looked at his serene face, pulling your hands to your chest. Kai wrapped a long arm around your shoulders, your leg resting on his thigh.

“Have a nice time?” you whispered.

“Mm,” Kai responded in agreement, his eyebrows raising slightly.

“Tired?”

“Mhm,” Kai groaned. As he let out a sigh, you smelled the potent waft of mulled wine on his breath and smiled lightly.

“Drunk?” you asked.

Kai opened one eye and peered down at you, a mischievous glint in his gaze. “No?” He asked more than told you.

You giggled slightly. “I can smell it on your breath.”

Kai closed his eye again and nuzzled his chin to the crown of your head. “Your nose is playing tricks on you. I am entirely in my right mind.”

You pressed your nose to his chest. “You sure about that?”

“Never been more sure about anything in my life.”

“Really?” you asked incredulously.

“How dare you question me and my faculties,” he joked, his voice laced with exhaustion and mock indignation.

You giggled again. “So taking off your pants but leaving your coat on in bed is just a fashion choice?”

Kai shifted slightly, looking down at his torso, which was indeed still encased in his jacket. You pulled back, trying to rein in your smile and laugh, which came out as a snort instead.

Kai looked at you, his gaze a little glazed over with alcohol. He slurred slightly, “It’s because I’m cold.” He sat up and began unzipping it. “And now, I’m taking it off because I’m too warm. Not because I didn’t mean to keep it on.”

You nodded, another snort escaping your nose. “Sure, Kai.”

Once he had undone his jacket, he whipped it off his body and onto the floor, laying back down on his side and reaching out to you, his hands grabbing into the air with no purpose. “Come here. Warm me up,” he begged, his voice taking on a pitiful tone.

“Just put your coat back on,” you joked.

Kai feigned a dramatic frown, wrapping his arms around his body and pretending to shiver, making you roll your eyes as you lay back down next to him. He let out a murmur of happiness, his chest vibrating against your own as he cuddled closer. “I’m freezing,” he mumbled.

“You’re ridiculous,” you replied, trying to suppress a laugh.

He nestled his face into your neck, his breath warm and ticklish against your skin. “Ridiculously cold,” he agreed, his tone playful.

You raised your head to look at him, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead. “You know, you’re not very convincing.”

Kai’s voice was edged with amusement “I convinced you to keep me around.”

“I can change my mind at any time,” you teased, but your smile gave you away.

Kai tightened his embrace, his voice dropping to a tender whisper. “I know, but you like me too much to do that.”

Your heart swelled at his words, and you pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. “I know.”

He grinned, his eyes fluttering shut. “Good. Now let’s get some sleep. I need to be well-rested to survive the freezing landscape of the city tomorrow.”

You chuckled, feeling a warmth spread through your chest that had nothing to do with the temperature. “Goodnight, Kai.”

“Goodnight,” he murmured, his voice already fading into the soft rhythm of sleep. 

You considered telling him about Titania, your mother, and all the history you had uncovered while he was out with friends, but as you opened your mouth to speak, you heard his soft snores and just smiled. It could wait.

Kai was always like this—protective and caring, even in his most inebriated state. His warmth enveloped you, and despite the cold draft from the window, you felt an undeniable sense of comfort and safety. You felt his steady breathing against your back, and his arm tightened around you slightly, as if even in his sleep, he wanted to ensure you were safe and close.

For the first time in a long while, you felt a semblance of peace. The world outside was filled with uncertainties and pain, but here, in Kai’s arms, you found a small refuge. You allowed yourself to melt into his embrace, the knot in your stomach untying itself with each passing moment. 

Tomorrow, you will face everything again—Titania, your mother’s memories, and the painful revelations. But tonight, in the warmth of Kai’s presence, you let yourself rest. 

To the readers, I'm screaming, crying, throwing up at what's coming.

@thatacotargirl @mcuamerica @lilah-asteria @florabelll @fightmedraco @marvelbros-oneshots @mariahoedt @quinzzelx @romantasyreader28 @minnieoo @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf @annabethgranger123 @krowiathemythologynerd @scatteredstardustt @romantacyreader28 @caroline-books @slytherintaco @sevikas-whore @sidthedollface2 @405rry @sleepylunarwolf @acourtofbatboydreams @quiettuba @julesofvolterra @skylarkalchemist @darling006 @rhysandorian

[breannasfluff]

Sweet Gestures

Collaboration with screaming-but-i-have-four-swords! Go check out the art!

AO3 Link

“So, I noticed you like sweets.”

Hyrule, who was trying to play coy while scooping sugar into his palm, startles and sends white grains flying across Legend and Ravio’s kitchen. “What—no—what?”

Ravio laughs and moves closer so he can bump shoulders. “There’s nothing wrong with liking sugar. But if you want something, I’m pretty sure I can make a recipe.”

“Oh. Yeah.” There isn’t the expected excitement.

“Or, I mean, you’re welcome to the sugar…?” Did he misread the situation?”

Hyrule only curls further into himself. “Sorry, I can clean up the mess.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about?” Ravio’s brows furrow; how did this conversation go wrong so quickly?”

“Um.” The traveler stares at his shoes, shoulders hunching. “Sorry, please excuse me.” Then he darts from the kitchen, bumping into Wild on his way out.

The champion watches him go, then turns to Ravio. “What was that about?”

“I don’t know! I said I noticed he likes sweets because he’s been taking sugar from the jar. I can make him a treat if he wants? And he just—shut down.” The merchant turns pleading eyes on Wild. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No, you are fine.” He claps a hand on Ravio’s shoulder and moves to help him sweep up the sugar on the counter. “Hyrule can be sensitive, that’s all. He’s had to protect himself for a long time. It’s hard to let others in.”

“Is it…a secret?”

Wild shrugs one shoulder. “I think Rulie would really like it if you made him something, though.”

Ravio nods, turning to pull out his cookbooks. “Let me think of something you couldn’t have on the road.”

Throwing a two-fingered salute, he saunters back out. Ravio returns to his cookbooks. What can he make that will be special, but also sweet? Not candy; Wild already makes honey candy for them on the road. Maybe…a pastry? He has been meaning to try that new recipe he found. Mind made up, he turns to pull out ingredients. ~

So the first batch is…well, calling them an eyesore is a compliment. Ravio gives a deep sigh before dumping them all in the trash. He’ll get better in round two. Maybe he’ll start prepping more dough so he doesn’t have to wait each time for the chilling period. At least he’s got all day.

Making more dough is a good idea because the second batch is also inedible. Most of the heroes have wandered into the kitchen and been chased out already. Legend sticks his head in, looks at his frazzled housemate, and abruptly retreats.

The third batch is burnt, because Ravio got distracted after putting them in to bake. He’s got more dough, but…after this, he’s going to be out of butter.

“Link!” He pops his head out the back door, making Four—sitting on the stoop—jump. “Link—oh, hi Four. Have you seen Legend?”

“I’m here, I’m here! What’s the racket about?”

“My hero!” The merchant gushes, batting his lashes. Legend’s face puckers. “I need more butter. Do you mind running out and grabbing some?”

“More butter? Didn’t we have plenty?”

“Yes.”

“Does this have to do with whatever you are burning in my kitchen?”

“Yes.”

“Do I get to eat it when you are done?”

“…yes.”

“Fine.” Legend rolls his eyes but reaches a hand down to pull Four up. “You’re coming with me.”

“What? What did I do?”

“You existed within my eyesight,” the vet deadpans.

“I can be shorter.”

Ravio leaves them to bicker, turning back to the dough he already had. This time, he’ll get it right. ~

By dinner time, the group decides to trek to Kakariko for dinner out, as Ravio’s turned the kitchen into what Legend deems, his own personal nightmare. Why is this so hard? Sure, it’s got a lot of finicky steps, and temperatures to follow, and layering the dough, and—

Maybe he should have picked something easier.

…he definitely should have picked something easier. ~

The group returns and goes to bed late, still giving the kitchen a wide berth. It’s after midnight when Ravio finally pulls out a perfect batch of baked goods and transfers them to cool.

Then he collapses in a chair, exhausted. Frustration sapped his patience hours ago, but the sweet does smell delicious. He’ll just wait for them to cool a little longer. It probably wouldn’t hurt to rest his eyes…just for a moment… ~

“Ravio? Ravio!”

The merchant mumbles something into his sleeve, then raises his head to blink at the blurry shape before him. “Hyrule? Is something wrong?”

“It smells really good in here. And then I found you asleep on the table. Shouldn’t you…go to bed?”

It takes another long moment for Ravio’s brain to catch up to the situation. “Oh! I made you something!” He’s out of the chair with a yawn, going to check on the baked goods. They’re cooler, but still a little warm. He transfers one to a plate and thrusts it at the healer.

“Um.” Hyrule takes it, a little nonplussed. “It's…late?”

“Oh. Yeah, you probably don’t want sweets this late, sorry. You can try it at breakfast.” He reaches for the plate, but Hyrule just pulls it into his chest. “Or you can try it now,” he amends.

“Is this what you were baking all day?”

Ravio grabs another pastry, carefully pulling the parchment away from the side. “Yeah. A little harder than I thought, but I think these ones turned out pretty well.”

Hyrule turns his around, then sucks on this thumb when it comes back sticky. His eyes light up and he takes a bite. Ravio copies him.

Butter and sugar are sandwiched between layers of dough. It took a lot of work to get it to roll out at the right consistency without melting, but the result is layers of light pastry. The sugar on the outside is caramelized and slightly sticky. While the butter is melted into the dough, each bite oozes richness.

Hyrule moans and shoves more of the baked good in his mouth. “Dis is the befst ting I’ve ever had. Dun tell Wild!”

It takes Ravio a second to decipher the words through his full mouth, but then he grins. “I’m glad you like it. And I agree, this is pretty darn good.”

The traveler swallows before speaking again. “How did you manage to make something sweeter than straight sugar?”

“The magic of baking?”

They both giggle and go back to their treats. Hyrule gives him another shy glance. “Really, thank you for going to all this effort. It means a lot.”

“You deserve it, Hyrule. And if this is one way I can help? I’m happy I got the chance to do so.”

The traveler’s smile is as sweet as the sugar they eat.

[iamqueenpotato]

Hurts Like Hell Part Two

Azriel x Reader

A/N- I honestly don't have the words for how grateful I am for the support with my writing. ❤️ It warms my heart and I appreciate each and every one of you! Here is part two! I lied when I said this would be the final part. There will be one more! Enjoy!

⚠️: Angst

Word Count: 3.4k

Part One Final Part

The Autumn court wasn’t an ideal place for you, but Lucien let you stay at his personal cabin, one that even his father had no idea of.

It took all of your willpower to stay out of Velaris, it was your home but yet each part of the beautiful city reminded you of the love you once had. You had written to your family, each of them knew where you were, you begged them to not say a word to Azriel. And thankfully they were more than willing to keep it a secret.

It had been a few months since you left Azriel and your home behind. And each second had been absolutely miserable, your thoughts were constantly occupied by the shadowsinger, and you knew his were occupied of you as well. The moments you faltered in keeping your walls up, you felt him. Trying to push his way to you, attempting to hear from you across that bond that still sat within you, dull and lifeless. It tore you apart. If it wasn’t for Lucien, you would have never attempted to piece yourself back together.

He is a great male and an even better friend. He stayed up with you when you had nightmares, made you tea to soothe you, and he listened. To all of it.

The pain that sat so heavy on your chest, began feeling lighter each time he didn’t let you hold it in. Even though his mate was somewhat a part of all of this, he never once judged you, never told you what to do. Never once made you feel at fault. He encouraged you to go outside and explore the beautiful lands around the cabin, he showed you how to hunt, so on the days he wasn’t present you would have enough food til he came back. Lucien gave you the space to heal but was always there when you needed someone to lean on. He was a support you never would have expected but were eternally grateful for all that he is.

But the thoughts of Azriel never went away. The wounds of your falling out were still healing, and you missed him. The times you found yourself crying was not because of what happened but because a piece of you was missing. The coldness was a feeling that you would never get used to, it ate at your soul, leaving a certain darkness within you. You did your best to distract yourself with books and other new hobbies. Though sometimes it wasn’t enough.

Lucien came back home one weekend, holding a bag of pastries you knew all too well.

“Are those what I think they are?” You spoke as you peeked over the book you had picked out from Lucien’s collection.

“They are, I was told these were your favorite. So I decided to grab some before I left Velaris.” Lucien smiled, handing the bag over to you. You grabbed it eagerly, taking a bite before offering the other one to Lucien, which he refused. “Your friends miss you.” He added.

You heard his words but your focus was on the food in front of you when the realization hit. There was only one person who knew what your favorite pastries were. “Lucien, who told you about these?” He didn’t answer, he sat down, taking off his boots, his red hair covering his eyes. You moved from your seat, standing in front of him. “Lucien.” He looked up towards you, a worried expression across his face as if you were mad at him for conversing with your mate.

“Azriel came up to me before I left, handed me that bag. I’m sorry.”

You weren’t hurt by his actions, nor were you bothered. You honestly didn’t know how to feel. “It’s okay Lucien, there’s no need to apologize.” You placed a reassuring hand upon his cheek. Giving him a shy smile. “How is he?” You didn’t know why you asked that, part of you was afraid of his answer.

Lucien stood, walking over to the kitchen to prepare a pot of tea. “If I am being honest.” He sighed. “Not good.”

Your face was still, it wasn’t the answer you were expecting, though it was better than hearing he had moved on, that he was doing better without you. But that didn’t stop the sudden sense of worry that washed over you. “What do you mean?”

Lucien gestured you to sit at the kitchen counter, you moved slowly. “Rhys told me he hasn’t really seen him since you left, he’s buried himself in jobs, hasn’t come to training, they’re all worried for him, but he won’t talk to anyone. And when they try to, he doesn’t give them the time of day.” You sucked in a sharp breath, not muttering a word. “He was forced to come to the meeting today. And Y/N, he doesn’t look well. I dont think he’s slept. Its as if all the life had been sucked out of him. The only color on him was that green pastry bag. He walked in holding it, never said a word to anyone but held on to it the entire time and when I motioned to leave he stopped me. All he said was they were your favorites and part of a weekend tradition.”

You watched as your tears dropped onto your hands that you had rested on the counter, Lucien didn't say anything as he walked around to you, pulling you close to his chest. It had been quite some time since you thought of the bakery. It was a time before things changed between you two. Each weekend you had off he would have to leave early for training, but after he would stop by your favorite bakery to grab pastries for the two of you. He would wake you up, pastries and tea in hand. It was a small thing he did that made you love him so dearly. But you couldn’t remember the last time he did something like that. Mornings lately always seemed more lonely.

Moments passed before you pulled yourself away from Lucien’s hold, wiping away the last of your tears. “I’m sorry, I didn’t expect that to affect me so much.”

“Y/N as I told you before, don’t apologize for these things.” He brushed a loose strand of hair out of your face, before placing a soft kiss on your forehead. “I have a question though.” He moved to the now singing tea kettle.

“What is it?” You asked, gladly accepting the fresh tea he gave you, turning to face him once he sat on the chair next to you.

“Would you ever talk to him again? Try and fix things?”

It was a thought you had internally debated ever since you left. And the answer wasn’t an easy one. As much as you yearned to see him again, to hear him out, if he had any explanation for his actions at all. You werent even sure there was anything to fix. Still, you weren’t ready. As strong as you are, he had wedged his way into your heart, the one thing you had built so many walls around. It would take time to heal, to prepare yourself for whatever would follow. “Not yet, I have considered it but I don’t think I am ready for that conversation.”

“Well you know I don’t mind your company, but whatever you decide, I’ll support you.”

“I don’t know if I have said this enough, but thank you.” You smiled.

“You can say it more.” He joked, you playfully slapped him on the arm, then pulled him in for another hug. He gladly embraced you before pulling away to walk upstairs to his room.

The next day you woke up early, the nightmares never ceased, and it was better to not sleep at all. You found Lucien downstairs, preparing his supplies for a hunt, you always wondered why he didn’t go to the market to buy supplies, but he claimed he enjoyed the peace and quiet. “Leaving?” You asked.

Lucien apparently didn’t see you when you came down the stairs so when you spoke it startled him, causing you to let out a small laugh. “Yes, I’ll be back by lunch but I have a task for you.”

“And that is?”

“Go to the garden once the sun rises, and pick some vegetables for dinner.” Lucien handed you a list, throwing his bag across his shoulder.

“Are you sure I can handle this?” You joked, folding the piece of paper in your hand.

“I believe in you. I’ll see you in a bit.” And with that he was out the door. You had some time before the sun would rise, moving to the couch you opened your book, making yourself comfortable.

Without fault you had lost track of time, a finished book in your hand, you stood, placing it down behind you. Grabbing your coat and a small wooden basket you set off for the garden. The air was chilly but the bright sun warmed your body as you sat picking various vegetables.

You got lost in your task until something in the air shifted as if a sudden gust of wind had rushed across the land. That’s when you saw them. The shadows that moved swiftly along the dirt. Your heart began racing as you looked around for the owner. Grabbing the vegetable basket, you stood, turning towards the exit but there he was. His tall figure standing at the edge of the garden. He didn't look the same, his wings sagged behind him, his shadows encompassed him, and his hair disheveled. Azriel stared at you but did not move, and the eyes that locked onto yours were not of the man you love, but of one who had been broken for far too long.

You moved towards him, your eyes never leaving his figure. Holding your breath as you inched closer to pass him. You would not break, you wouldn’t let him see you falter. Ignoring the way his shadows around his body lept for you as you brushed past him. You felt the pain build within your chest as you felt the cool touch of them, one that was all too familiar. Once you were out of his reach you increased your pace, desperately needing to be back inside.

“Y/N.” Azriel called out, his voice cracking, it pained you to hear the agony in his voice, turning, you faced your mate. You reminded yourself to be strong, to not let him in.

“What are you doing here Azriel?” You hated how harsh your words came out, watching Azriel physically flinch at your tone as if you had just wounded him.

“I needed to see you, Y/N. My world has fallen apart without you. I don’t know who I am anymore.” He attempted to move closer to you, but with each step forward that he took, you took one back.

“Maybe you should have thought of that before you decided to shut me out.” Your voice was calm, though your thoughts ran rapid within your mind. “Please leave.” You added.

“Y/N please, don’t push me away.”

“Don’t push you away?” Your voice was suddenly louder, the emotion filling the air around you felt like a fog, slowly blurring your vision. “I spent months trying to understand why. Wondering if maybe it was my fault you pushed me aside. I always asked myself if I was deserving of love. And maybe I’m not because I lost you. I wasn’t enough to keep myself from being forgotten.” You could feel the tears building up behind your eyes, threatening to fall at any moment.

Azriel was crying now, frantically wiping the tears away, releasing a shuddering breath as he inched closer to you. “You are deserving of love more than anyone I know, you have always had my heart.”

“Did I though?” Azriel stared at you, his empty eyes searching your face for some sort of answer. “Cause I’m starting to think that I never actually had you at all.”

You were aware of the words once they left your lips. And it hurt you to watch as your words cut Azriel like a knife, the pain that you had just inflicted could not be undone. Azriel dropped to his knees, he looked as though all the hope he once had held had been ripped from his soul, leaving him defeated and empty. Tears began falling down your cheeks, you wanted to reach for him, to apologize but your body did not move, you were stuck watching as he suffered.

You saw Lucien in the distance, praying he would come over and save you. Once you locked eyes with your friend, he looked between you and your mate, dropping whatever animal he had caught, and rushing over to your side. Lucien placed his hands on your cheeks, trying to get you to speak. He attempted to turn towards Azriel but you collapsed within his arms, begging him to take you inside. Without hesitation, he listened, but as you moved your eyes never left Azriel, the way his hazel eyes begged you to stay. To forgive him. You saw him winnow away as Lucien closed the door behind the two of you. That’s when you let your emotions free, Lucien held you close, letting you cry until you couldn’t anymore.

Lucien never asked what had occurred that day, it had been weeks since Azriel spontaneously showed up at the cabin, and the pain never lessened, you couldn’t sleep, as much as your body yearned for it, it was a far better outcome than seeing the crestfallen face of your mate every time you closed your eyes. Lucien began worrying more and more, the pieces of you that you had worked so hard to start to put back together were slowly falling apart once more. You haven't left your room, Lucien begged for you to come outside, to walk with him for a little, but all the motivation to get better had left you. Maybe it was because of the memory of your words, how they made Azriel completely fall apart in front of you, or maybe it was the guilt of it all. Either way, you would never forgive yourself for what you had said. You made it sound as though your entire relationship was a lie. And you hated yourself for it.

All the memories the two of you shared, that you created, sat so heavily on your chest in these recent weeks. From healing his wounds, to the nights you showed him recipes from your childhood, the ones that filled your heart with so much love. But then again, they all did. Yet it only made you wonder how it all fell apart. How was it that one moment you two were deeply in love and then the next moment it was all gone?

A knock at your door brought you from your thoughts, you let out a quiet acknowledgment for whoever to enter. Lucien walked in holding a bowl of food, but he was not alone. Behind him Cassian entered, he was smiling but the second he saw you the smile turned into an expression full of concern. Lucien handed you the bowl, your hands shaking as you placed it on your lap. He didn’t say a word to you, only placing a soft kiss on the top of your head, before exiting the room, leaving you and Cassian alone.

“How are you doing Y/N?” Cassian asked as he sat on the edge of your bed. You didn’t answer him, not to ignore him , but you truly didn’t know how you were doing. Your mind felt shattered, empty. Cassian moved closer to you, grabbing your hand to place it within his. “I miss you, we all do.”

“I miss you guys too.” You spoke and you hated how you sounded so broken.

“I heard about Azriel’s visit. I want to apologize.” You looked at Cassian, puzzled about what he was trying to apologize for.

“Why?” You asked.

“I shouldn’t have slipped up about who you were staying with. It came out unintentionally and I wasn’t expecting him to come here. To ambush you in such a way. I am sorry.”

You squeezed his hand in reassurance, letting him know you weren’t mad. You knew he would never purposefully hurt you. “Cas I miss him. So much it hurts. But how can I forgive him? How can I stop these constant thoughts that I was the problem. That who I am made him leave me behind. I want to forgive him but I don’t know where to begin.” You choked out. “Maybe it was all my fault.”

He leaned closer to you, squeezing your hand tighter, forcing you to look him in the eyes. “This was not your fault, do not blame yourself. There is nothing wrong with who you are. You were right to be angry, to feel these things. My brother was wrong to treat you in such a way, but I don’t believe he ever stopped loving you. Forgiving will be hard, I understand that. What happened is not something that is easily forgivable. But healing takes time. And once you’re ready, you will know. But don’t give up on yourself. Please kiddo, for me at least.”

You smiled weakly as the tears flowed freely down your cheeks, Cassian set your food aside before pulling you into an embrace. “Cassian I said something that I regret. How can I live with myself after hurting him like that?”

Cassian held you tighter, rubbing soothing circles across your back. “We all say things we don’t mean. Emotions are a wild thing, sometimes they’re good and sometimes they’re bad but that is life, and it is cruel but it is also beautiful. Y/N I know you will be okay. You are strong. You need to forgive yourself. Don’t blame yourself for things out of your control.”

You nodded against Cassian’s chest, unsure if you believed him, but the more the words replayed in your head, it slowly began to sink in. You still worried for Azriel, Lucien was right when he said he wasn’t doing good and you couldn’t help but feel guilty that you possibly made it worse. “What about Az? Have you talked to him?”

Cassian sighed. “I have not. He isn’t talking to anybody. The last time I saw him was the morning after you left, we uh-” Cassian paused, rubbing the back of his neck. “We sort of got into a fight. He wouldn't talk, and I was getting pissed that he wouldn't tell me why he treated you in such a way.” You let out a breathy laugh through the tears, those boys were always fighting, but it warmed your heart a bit to know that Cassian had defended you like that. “What happened between you two has taken a toll on him. My brother is a fool first of all. But he is a fool in love. Y/N I am not making up excuses for him, for what he did, but he loves you so much, that it's killing him. He regrets what he did. Though he hasn’t said it out loud, we all know. He isn’t the same without you.”

You could say the same for yourself, life without your mate has been difficult, each moment you wish you were back in your townhome, tucked beside him, enjoying the time you shared. It was a warmth you cherished, you could only hope you could feel that again. “I will talk to him eventually Cas. But I need some more time.”

“There is no rush when it comes to healing. You take all the time you need. And when you’re ready Y/N, we will all be anxiously awaiting your return.” Cassian stood, giving you one last hug before he disappeared through the door of your room.

Though there was so much going through your head, so much that you knew you had to work through. For the first time in months, that small part of you that truly believed things would start to be okay peeked through, reigniting that flame of hope you thought had vanished. You would push through this. For yourself. And for Azriel. No matter how long it took.

Taglist: @honestlywtfisgoingon @fanfictioniseverything

[garricks4thwingqueen]

Rebellious Secrets

Request prompt:  

Garrick and Reader are in a long-term relationship and have a fight about something and when she wants to reconcile, she overhears him say something that drives them further apart? Just some angsty, angsty stuff? I'll leave it up to you if it’s a happy end  ;)

Synopsis: You are Xaden Riorson’s younger sister. You had survived your parents' rebellion with Xaden and Garrick and your cousin Bodhi by your side. With the years leading up after the rebellion and to when you’d each have to start at Basgiath War College. You and Garrick had become more than the close friends you were. You had been fostered away from your brother and Liam and in the same foster home as Garrick. You both were the only rebel child in the foster household you were put in. Garrick took it under his responsibility to care for you and protect you with being placed so far away from everyone else; you and Garrick had quickly fallen in love with each other. Foster siblings or not you two didn’t care as you had feelings for each other before these dreaded times. You and Garrick had cherished every moment together from when you were You and Garrick also had not cared that your foster parents kept reminding you that you were only 15 and Garrick was 17. You both spent every day basking in each other’s young love, finally out of the view of your older brother to do as you two had wished as soon as you were old enough to have an inappropriate thought about Garrick cloud your mind. You both had spent every waking moment and sleeping moment with each other after being placed in the foster home until the dreaded day had come for Garrick and Xaden to start at Basgiath. 

Word Count: 6266. I got a little carried away here! But it is split into sections by a timeline frommate.

Trigger Warnings: suggestive NSFW but not full scenes, panic attacks, nightmares, distrust, tissues on standby, prolonged months of not talking to S.O, and family members. Mentions of death.  I think that's it! 

*July 2nd 627 A.U.*

                          Y /N POV

     You stirred waking in your new bedroom in Lewellen. Yesterday was supposed to be your 15th birthday but instead it had turned into a living hell. You moved your arms to the other side of the bed where Garrick Tavis had fallen asleep holding you in his arms after the turmoil of events that occurred yesterday. You sighed at the coldness of the mattress that was left behind and you let the events of yesterday race in mind. You, your older brother Xaden, your cousin Bodhi Durran as well as Garrick and all the other children of the rebellion were forced to watch your parents be executed as their attempts at a rebellion that was led by your father failed. You had cried in Garrick’s arms as you watched your parents die. You had cried in his arms as your brother got whipped 107 times representing the children of the traitors of Navarre as a plea to save our lives. You were still crying when each one of you got separated into foster homes. Garrick and yourself were found to be in a foster home in Lewellen, which was far enough away from Trivanne which was far enough away from your brother and Liam to make visits almost nearly impossible. “Hey, you're awake.” Garrick had smiled softly as he came back with a tray and a few pastries. “How are you feeling, little one?” He asked softly to get back in bed with you as you laid his head on his shoulder. “Tired, upset, angry and maybe slightly confused.”

        Garrick hummed at your reply “I get it. I feel the same. I’m sorry that was a pretty shitty birthday.” “One I’d rather forget. Do you know if we are near any of the others?” “I overheard our foster parents talking and I don’t think so, at least not many of the older ones of us, maybe some of the younger children.” You cupped his cheek softly; “At least we have each other, and we can finally explore this; even if you are now my foster brother.” Garrick took your small hand into his much larger one and chuckled softly at the mention of you two now being foster siblings; “How about we start by actually celebrating your 15th birthday. Maybe a walk to take in our new surroundings and then maybe find a nice private spot to call our own.” “Gare Bear, that sounds amazing.” You said softly and took a bite of the raspberry scone he had brought in. “I wonder what our foster parents are going to think of getting the only rebellion teens in a relationship.” You had smirked and ran your fingers through his hair fixing a few unruly curls. Garrick had chuckled again and placed a soft kiss on your forehead. “If they have a problem with it, I’ll do everything I need to in order to protect you Y/N.” Which you had already known he already felt an overdrive of urgency to do as you were Fen Riorson’s youngest, who was the leader of the Tyrrish rebellion. 

   *March 629 A.U.*    

                            Y /N POV

       You were finally able to see your brother for the first time after the apostasy. 

  “You ready little one?” Garrick had asked as you had finished getting dressed. “I should be the one asking you Gary.” You teased and ran your hands along his arms and earned a low groan from his mouth. “You know how I feel about that one nickname Y/N.” He smirked. “I know my lover, but you finally get to tell my brother about us and the fact we have been dating for 8 months.” You teased rubbing your nose together. Garrick had groaned as there was a soft knock at your door. “Come in.” You had softly expected your foster parents as your brother and Liam were meant to arrive until later. “Xad!” You exclaimed excitedly and jumped into his arms. Your brother chuckled softly; “I missed you too, Y/N. I assume Gare has been taking good care of you?” “More than you want to know.” You smirked as your brother put you down to hug his best friend as you hugged the oldest Mairi son. It had been too long since you and Garrick had seen any of the others. “Something you need to tell me, Garrick.” Your brother said mockingly. Garrick smirked, wrapping his arm around your waist. “Ok, that’s enough said already.” Xaden groaned and added; “So you two become foster siblings and decide to hook up?” Xaden smirked. “Oh we had feelings well before that.” You teased running your hands through your brother's hair. “I think we have an 18th birthday that has passed that we need to celebrate.” You had stated quickly changing the topic. And with that is what the four of you had down for the next few days. You each had spent the nights out under the stars when your brother and Liam were here and you were glad you did because little did you know that would be the last time you saw your brother until you were due to cross the parapet yourself in 633 Au. 

      *July 631  A.U.*   

                              Y/N POV 

   “You can’t leave.” I mumbled through pursed lips into Garick’s chest. It had finally come to the time where Garrick and Xaden were the first of the rebellion children to enter the riders quadrant. That meant two years of being away from him completely. Two years of not knowing if he or your brother would be dead or alive when it came time for you and Liam to join the quadrant. Two years of you being alone in the bed that you had shared with a much larger male that engulfed your much larger smaller frame and kept you safe every night for the past four years. 

        You felt him place a soft kiss on your forehead. “They’ll go by faster than you think they will my little one.” He soothed as the tears finally streamed your face as you finally voiced your thoughts out loud. As you spoke your thoughts you felt his strong hand wipe your tears; “ Maybe for you but for me I have to worry about; two years of not knowing if you're alive or Xaden. Two years of not being able to fall asleep in your arms. Two years of-.” Garrick had cut you off “Hey ssssh. It’s going to be alright. I’m going to be worried about you two Y/N. In two years time you’ll be in my arms again and you’ll get to see Xaden, I promise.” He said softly as we heard aloud knock on the door, “Garrick! Time to leave!! It’s a four day trek!.” Your foster father had bellowed through the closed door. Tears still claiming your face you hung onto Garrick tighter. “Please don’t say the words.” You mumbled quietly; you had always hated goodbye; it was so permanent and everyone around you knew it. “It’s not goodbye, little one.” He said softly, squeezing you back just as tightly if not tighter.15 minutes had to have passed as Garrick had finished getting dressed and returned from the bathroom. “Everything is in your pack.” You had said softly reluctantly, handing it to him as you had sneaked a letter in there towards the bottom one for both him and Xaden. “Oh Y/N. Come here.” He said softly wrapping you in his arms as you wrapped your legs around his waist. “Tavis!” Your foster father now bellowed and knocked in the door. “Say goodbye to your foster sister and let's go, now!” Your foster parents had never approved of your and Garrick’s relationship, but that never stopped the both of you from falling madly in love with each other. Garrick rubbed soothing circles along your back, “Please don’t cry for me. If we can write, we will write as soon as possible, I promise. It’s not goodbye Y/N." "Garrick.! Let’s move it now. Being late to conscription day is not a good way to start your support for this country.” He bellowed full well knowing that was like a blow to the chest for both Garrick and I. 

       You softly traced his rebellion relic, your legs still wrapped around his waist. You felt Garrick start to move just as you were and he stopped as you had reached the porch and he sat you down on the chair outside; your foster father waiting by the carriage sternly. Garrick knelt down in front of you and intertwined your fingers and lifted them up and placed a soft kiss on your hands. Until next to my little one.” He said softly and pushed back a few of your stary bangs along your forehead. Somehow you managed to mumble out an “I love you. I love you both; both you and Xadn.” “I know he said softly; I’ll remind him and I love you Y/N, so much your my everything. Promise me that one day when we are able to, you'll accept my hand in marriage?” He asked softly, pulling a box from his pocket. “There’s nothing more that I would ever want in this world. Just promise me I’ll have your arms to jump into in two years. 

    Garrick smiled softly; that soft smile that you loved so much as he slipped the ring on your finger; “I promise. That is if our foster Father doesn’t kill me first.” You sighed’

“I love you. Always Gare.” He squeezed your hand one last time while standing up and placed a soft kiss on your forehead as you felt his warm hands leave your smaller ones. “Always my little one.” He whispered as you watched him turn and walk away from you. 

                        * July 633  A.U.*   

                           Y/N POV

  You had woken up a few days prior before your start at Basgiath War College the same way Garrick had two years ago. “Y/N.” Your foster Father had knocked on your door loudly, “Time to leave now! Although I suppose you’ll move your ass faster than that boy did as you’ll get to see him if he's still alive.” You had groaned getting out of bed that morning. You thankfully had known that Garrick and Xaden were both still alive thanks to the letters they were finally able to send last year.

  The few day's journey you had taken you and your foster Father to get to Basgiath was the longest few days of your life. You had signed in at the main gate and departed from your foster Father. Your main goal was one: to find Liam before you both had to cross a death bridge called the parapet and two: finally see Garrick, Xaden and Bodhi again. You hadn’t cared about the snide remarks you had gotten about your rebellion relic as you were focused on finding Liam. “Marked Bastard.” or “Traitor’s kid.” Were two of the most common remarks you heard. But as you spotted a blonde haired boy a few feet away with his rebellion relics down his arm none of that mattered anymore. You tapped his shoulder and both of you embraced each other in a hug before crossing the parapet. 

                                                    Garrick’s POV

     I looked down the list of names as each cadet that had crossed gave them to Xaden. One glance down to the see of potential cadets to see who was next in line made my heart stop. “Get ready for the next one, Riorson.” I said to Xaden a catch in my voice purely prominent. “Name.” Xaden had said to the cadet that stood before us even though we both knew it clearly. “Y/N Riorson.” she said calmly, to calm for someone that was about to cross this death trap but I knew she was trying to keep her composure and not show affection towards either of us right now. “Go ahead.” Xaden said coolly and nodded his head behind us. I couldn’t help but whisper “Small steps, It’s slick with the rain. I love you.” I said as quietly as possible as I felt her fingers brush mine lightly.                                                                

                                                         Y/N POV

  You had already been reunited with your cousin and Imogen and with stood formation before you even had the chance to see Garrick or your brother. You were making your way to the dinning hall as you felt a tug on your arm pulling you around the corner, it took everything in you not to gasp at the contact as you knew who was grabbing you already and pulling you into their chest. “Gods I’ve missed you.” Garrick said softly, pulling you in tighly. “I missed you too, so much more than you could ever know.” “You're ok?” he asked with concern heavily in his voice as he stepped back to get a good luck at you and ran his hands up and down your arms. “I’m fine, Gare. Promise.” You said softly. “Gods I love you.” He said soothingly pulling you into one more tight against him one more time. “I love you too, Gare.” You had said soothingly as you held each other tightly. “Listen, love, I know it’s going to be hard but we can’t publicly display our affection towards each other. At least not until Threshing. It’s for your own safety, little one.” You nod into his chest not trusting your voice in the moment. “I don’t need other cadets, especially older cadets thinking you're trying to sleep your way to safety by dating a squad leader. You already have a target on your back for being a marked one and another for being Xaden’s younger sister.” “Will get through it Gare, I’m just glad to have you again baby.” You said softly into his chest.

                   * September 633 A.U.*  

                            Y/N POV 

   One month until Threshing.  “Anyone have any questions?” Xaden asked as you met up with the rest of the current rebels at Basgiath under a tree late at night. “Physics.” One girl had said quietly one you had never met personally until this year that had also started with you and Liam as you had sat on the ground sitting on Garrick’s lap. At least these meetings of your brother’s was one place you and Garrick could show affection towards each other. “Seriously, I feel you. I don’t even know what physics has to do with dragon riding anyways.” You said with a giggle as Garrick nibbled  your ear “You doing fine with our study sessions little one.” “Legit study sessions?” Bodhi smirked. “Oh shut it Durran.” You had teased turning to look over Garrick’s shoulder. “Everything good Y/N?” He asked. You shook your head “Yeah, I just thought I had heard a noise is all.” “Physics is easy and the least  of our problems. We can start having actual study sessions.” Your brother said glaring towards you and Garrick. “Anything else?” “Yeah Sorrengail.” Imogen sneered to your right. “I told you Cardulo she’s mine to handle.” “Imogen and I could do a better job, brother.”  you smirked as Garrick chuckled. “Enough from all of you. She is mine to handle.” He said as you and Imogen both groaned. “If there’s nothing else suppressing tonight, I think that’s it.” Xaden said dismissing you all. As you stood you turned your head trying to take in all of your surroundings as most of the others had left you, Xad, Bodhi and Garrick. “Little one?” Garrick asked. “I just thought I saw movement on the branch, but it’s probably just an animal.” The boys nodded in agreement and Xaden had stated he wanted to walk back by himself and over time all of you had learned not to question your brother. 

                   * November 633 A.U.*   

                                  Y/N POV 

  Threshing had come and gone and you were now bonded to a green daggertail named Carieann who happened to be of the sme line as Cruir who was bonded to your cousin Bodhi. You were getting used to having Carie in your mind almost 24/7. Now that you were bonded you had your own room like the other bonded first years but spent most nights in Garrick’s room still anyways. His bed was just bigger and comfier for the both of you. Your signet had also manifested and you were the first in your year to join Carr’s class. Air. Carieann had said to you when you first knocked everything off the desk in Garrick’s room without being near your desk during your morning sex one day. You can manipulate, good job little one.  She said softly; which Carrieann you had found had a soft demeanor for a dragon. 

    You groaned when you felt a cold spot in your bed where Garrick should have been. You could faintly hear a soft argument coming through the walls to the room that was attached to Garrick’s, but you couldn’t make out anything the two males were saying. You grumbled pullin on your black robe as you walked across the hall and knocked on your brother’s door; you could hear the two males instantly shut up upon doing so. “Y/N, come in.” Xaden said as he opened the door. “And what were my brother and boyfriend arguing about, at this ungodly hour in the morning?” You mumbled through a yawn, wrapping yourself around Garrick’s waist from the side. “We weren’t arguing.” Xaded stated flatly. “I could clearly hear both of you across the hall. Also you’ve always been a terrible liar Xay.” “You caught us love, we were arguing.” Gare had said and placed a kiss on the top of your head; “I’m sorry we woke you up.” He said softly. 

    “What were you arguing about? It was about me wasn't it?” “Don’t be silly. It wasn’t about you. It was about mine and Sorrenail’s issue.” Xaden had said softly as Garrick scoffed. “Right, the Sorrengail issue. Something tells me that wasn’t it this time.” “It’s nothing for you to worry about. Just some third year stuff.”  Garrick had scoffed again. “Alright fine, I’ll drop it. I get it.” You had groaned. “Come little one, let's get dressed for classes.” Garrick said and guided you out of your brother’s room; not without a snide glare back towards your brother. You could have sworn you felt your brother’s shadows brush your wrist softly as you and Garrick had left. 

   *Winter Solstice 633  A.U.*   

                              Y/N POV 

   Winter Solstice used to be one of your favorite holidays. However that was until you had noticed your boyfriend and brother were absent from the activities.In fact you had noticed they were absent from everything all day now that you had thought about it. “Bodhi.” “Hmmm.” Your cousin hummed in reply, not looking up from the game of chess he was playing with Liam. “Where the hell are Xaden and Garrick?” “I’m not sure what you mean, Y/N.” You sighed heavily as you were sitting in a common room and enjoying the fire, or more like trying to. “You sure as hell do Durran and you know it. Why they hell have they been acting so weird lately?”   

 “No ones been acting weird lately.” Xaden said as he and Garrick sat on the couch next to you. Instead of cuddling into Garrick’s side like you had wanted to, you stood up. “Yes you have both of you have even Durran.” You said sternly pointing a finger at each of them as you directed your voice towards them. “Y/N, sweetheart calm down.” Garrick said softly standing up, but you pushed him back down. “No you don’t get to sweetheart me. Not right now.” “You’ve all been hiding something from me and I demand it right now.” At that you had gotten both boys to sighed heavily; you had even gotten a sigh out of Bodhi. “Where the hell were you two today?” Garrick sighed and glanced towards Xaden. “We were-” “No.” You're brother had cut him off with a sharp tone. “She'll when the time is right.” “I knew you had been hiding something. '' I said, voice sharp and fists clenched. Little one.” Garrick had said softly and pulled you into a calming embrace before your anxiety attack had a chance to spiral. “Breathe.” he said softly rubbing soft circles along your back.

   Several months had passed and it was now mid February and it seemed like Garrick, Xaden and Bodhi were gone more frequently and you were about to reach your wits end with all of them. You sighed heavily sitting down to breakfast with Imogen and the others. “What's up your ass?” Imogen asked from across the table. “I just feel like the boys are hiding more than what they’re letting on about.” “Come on Y/N/N, Garrick’s your boyfriend, Xaden is your brother, and Bodhi is your cousin. Do you really think those three are hiding anything from you?” “Yeah Imogen I do. They’ve been coming back at all certain points when they do go wherever the hell they go. Hell sometimes Garrick isn’t even back in bed until the next morning, a few hours before we have to get up from classes.” “Relax, Riorson.” Liam said. “Relax?” I snapped. “I’m tired of hearing that word from anyone from Carrieann from Xaden from Garrick.  Breathe, Liam did nothing he's just trying to understand. Carrieann chimed in your mind. You sighed. “I’m sorry, Li.” You had said softly. “It’s just each time I even ask about what's going on Garrick is all ready to tell me and Xaden just cuts me off and says when the time is right.” “I’ve tyred asking about them and I get the same response.” Violet said to you in an understanding.  “I’m just going to get ready for class.” You said take your barely half eaten breakfast to the trash. 

     You had decided to take the long way back to the dorms when you paused and heard bickering male voices you knew all too well. You paused in your steps you could have sworn you heard your brother say Aretia and Rebellion.  You stormed around the corner; “Good Morning boys. Nice of you to finally come back to the quadrant.”  You snapped towards the three of them. “Sweetheart.” Garrick said softly. “No.” You had snapped; “I’m done. I’m done with these secrets. I demand to know what's going on.” “We’ve only kept this quiet to protect you and the others from back home.” Xaden started to say softly. “In our first year here we decided to help rebuild our home. We also decided to smuggle weapons out of Basgiath to help aid the gryphon fliers.” Garrick said, reaching for your wrist as you pulled away. “And you decided to keep that from each of us since you’ve started? That you’ve been going home and rebuilding our childhood home?” You stammered. “Y/N/N.” Xaden said softly. “I’m sorry.” Garrick said softly trying to reach for you again but at this point you had backed yourself away from them and backed closer into the opposite wall. “If you're sorry then let me help, let the others help.” Your brother gave you a solemn look that you knew all too well. “It’s too dangerous, Y/N/N. '' Xaden said. You shook your head and started to hold the tears that were brimming your eyes. “Little one.” Garrick said softly trying to stop closer to you. Your cousin is a silent specter in all of this. “I can’t do this anymore, not right now. I need a break from all of you.” “Y/N/N, please.” Garrick said softly hurt clearly on his face just as much as yours.  

     “Let me know when you boys have rethought your decision.” You stammered out barely keeping your composure together. That night you had gone to your own room for the first time since it had been assigned to you as yours. You climbed into the cold bed and tried to get comfortable without Garrick by your side. Half of you, more than half of you was screaming to go up the stairs and climb into his bed and into his arms. You had spent basically every night in that man’s arms since you started dating besides the two years you were separated. I know this is hard but I’m proud of you for standing your ground;  Y/N.  Carrieann chimed in your head softly. Rest you will need it, I’ll keep you safe.  So you can be sweet, Good night Carrieann. You teased back at your dragon down your bond. 

              *July 1st- July 8th 634 A.U.* 

Y/N POV

    It was now the month of July and being a cadet at Basgiath War College July meant several things. Reunification day which was today, war games and graduation. Graduation meant you and Garrick would be separated again, that is if you were ever talking again; as July also meant it had been almost four whole months since you have given the boys the ultimatum. The only one you had really talked to besides Liam and Imogen as Bodhi as you knew your cousin was mainly the innocent bystander in Garrick and Xaden’s schemes. July also meant that each squad would participate in war games before graduation. 

       The day was long and drawing out as you prepared for the evening. You were only going to the evenings events to support Liam who was crowned the body guard of Violet several months ago. When you reached the courtyard you stationed yourself on a bench as secluded as you could be. “I didn’t expect to see you here, Riorson.” Dain said softly sitting down next to you. You sniffled pushing back the tears that were threatening to escape at the thoughts in the back of your mind. “I’m just here so Liam isn’t alone.” “I see. So are you going to talk to your boyfriend and brother anytime soon again?” “I don’t know. They held some big lies that I’m still not completely over and they also haven’t accepted their ultimatum.” You sniffled. “Hey it’s ok.” Dain said softly placing a hand on the small of your back as the fireworks ended and symbolized the ending of the event.

     “Can I walk you back to your room?” Dain asked genuinely to help you stand, you nod softly. “I’d like that, please.” “Of course. Long way or short?” He asked, wrapping his arm around the middle of your waist. “Long.” You had responded in hopes you wouldn’t pass that many other cadets as you weren’t in the mood for much conversaton. As you and Dain had passed around the corner to the first floor dorms you felt a hand softly grab your wrist and watched Garrick step out of the shadows. You watched as he took in the sight of Dain’s arm around your waist. “Can we talk?” Garrick asked, his voice weavering on the verge of confiedence. “That depends if you and Xaden are ready to let me help.” “Y/N/N.” Garrick said in a mild tone and that was all you needed to know for an answer; “Goodnight, Tavis.” You said flatly turning towards your room hiding the tears threatening your face; Dain’s hand still placed softly on your back as reassurance as you unlocked your door. “Are you settled for the night?” He asked as he gave you once over. You nodded; “Yeah, I’m just gonna grab my things and head to the shower rooms and freshen up before trying to sleep.” “I don’t know whatever it is that they are not letting you be a part of but if you ever need anyone.” He said in a less than confident voice, hand resting on the back of his neck. “Thanks, Dain. It’s definitely complicated. I’m sure they’ll come around. If they don’t-” I paused the tears threatening again at the complete chance of losing both your love of your life and your brother.” Dain nodded in a content agreement and gave you one more hug before you both had said goodnight. 

     You had felt a rushed knock at your door and groaned to Dain at the other end. “What's going on?” You mumbled sleepily. “War games. We need to meet in our squad and split into teams. Flight field on 15.” You grumbled gathering your bag and. Carrieann.  You asked down your bond. I’m ready, so are the others. She said calmly, almost too calm for what was about to happen as you meet up with the rest of the squad; Xaden and Dain are already bickering about teams. “Hey Riorson.” Ridoc said happily, slapping an arm around your back, “You look like shit.” “Gee thanks Gamlyn.” “Anytime.” He smirked as you and Garrick locked eyes with each other. A hint of remorse could almost be seen from him. “Y/N.” He said walking over to you. “Now really isn’t the best time for us to have this conversation, Garrick.” “Marked ones with me and everyone else with Aetos.”  as you were both cut off by your brother stepping into place as you heard Violet protesting to go with us. You stepped forward, “It’s fine Violet and I can switch that way Tairn and Sgaeyl can be together if something happens.” Garrick tried reaching for you as you went to switch out with Violet but you just shrugged him off. Dain handed you the flag he was holding as if it was a silent action to solidify your spot on this side of your team. However even though you weren’t going to admit you were a little pained that you weren’t going to face whatever was ahead with the rest of the marked ones; your forever family. “Alright everyone knows what to do.” Xaden said in his wingleader voice and through a soft gaze towards you as he said “Fly out.” You mounted Carrieann as the group mounted their dragons. I know this is tough I'm proud of you. She said to you softly. 

              *July  6th 634 A.U.*  

                               Y/N POV  

        It had been almost three whole days since the other team should have been back. The other team consisted of your friends, your cousin, your brother, your boyfriend. You sighed, taking your seat between Rhiannon and Ridoc during battle brief that morning. “You ok Riorson.” Ridoc asked “They should be back. They were supposed to be back by now.” You had felt a pang of guilt with how things were between you, Xaden and Garrick when war games started. You were now certain it would only be days until you heard all their names on the morning death roll; knowing that you had been arguing for months before they left had taken a sudden toll in the past few days and your friends have noticed.  “It’s all going to be ok.” Ridoc said softly and placed a reassuring hand on your knee. “Garrick and Xaden and I haven’t even been talking, Carrieann can’t reach any of their dragons and yet here we are continuing classes as if everything is supposed to be normal.” You stammered as your breathing was getting heavy as Professor Devera started the lesson as you bolted from your seat as you felt another panic attack starting to consume you. “Riorson; where are you going?” The professor directed towards me. “I can’t.” You had managed to stammer out as you could very faintly hear Dain apologizing for the both of you as he followed you out into the hall. “Breathe, It’s ok, just Breathe; Y/N/n.” He said soothingly, running his hands along your arms as he had down several times in the past days. 

        Carrieann would often alert Cath in the middle of the night if you had a panic attack or nightmare after the end of war games.”How is everything supposed to be normal when half of our squad is still missing. Half of our squad that is my family.” “I know, I know this is tough, but I promise you they are going to be ok.” He said softly as he had several other times this week. “How I’m I supposed to live with myself if this is how it ends?” “They both know you love them. You were standing up for yourself.” “I can’t go back to class.” “I know.” Dain soothed as your breathing started to come back to normal. “A walk in the courtyard for some fresh air?” You nodded as you knew he was the only one who could even feel close to how you were feeling because of Violet. 

      You sighed heavily in all defeat with none of the being back yet as you woke up on what was supposed to be Xaden and Garrick’s graduation day. Dain stirred beside you as he refused to leave after you had finally calmed down after your nightmare last night; which had been the worst one you had yet. “Are you ok if I go back upstairs and get dressed and ready for formation? You nod slightly; “Yeah I’ll be fine and hey Dain?” “Yeah?” He asked, tossing his black t-shirt back on. “Thank you again, especially for refusing to leave.” “Of course.” He said softly and placed a soft hand on your shoulder before he left.

*July  11th 634 A.U.*  

Y/N

Guilt was  riding all over you as you joined your squad sitting next to day during morning formation. You laid your head down on his shoulder keeping your tears at bay as you weren’t prepared for this morning's death roll. “Good morning cadets.” Captain Fitzgibbons said as he took his place on the dias. July 11th, 634 Au; Imogen Cardulo, and there it was you thought the first set of tears threatening to escape as the captain began reading your friends names; Bodhi Durran; your heart now sank as he said your cousins name; Liam Mairi, and there it was the first tear to fall from your face onto Dain’s shoulder as he placed a soft hand on your back followed by Sawyer following Dain’s movement; Violet Sorrengail, the captain continued to read; Garrick Tavis, and there it was one of the names that sent you spiraling into an ocean of tears; Xadan Riorson-. “Well this is rather awkward.” Your heart skipped a million voices. It had been almost two weeks. Was your mind playing tricks on you? You nervously lifted up your head from Dain’s shoulder; tears streaming down your face. But sure enough there stood your brother and Garrick and everyone else the one person missing was Liam. You had locked eyes with Garrick as you heard the captain say: 

  “I don’t understand,” Fitzgibbons says to the two scribes behind him, then addresses Panchek. “They aren’t dead. Why would they have been reported for the death roll?”   

     You steadily hold your gaze with Garrick tears still streaming down your face as he steadily holds his gaze with yours. There was nothing more that you wanted to break formation and jump into the arms of the man you loved. You needed to feel him to know he was really there to know that Liam was unfortunately the only one to really be gone. But you know you couldn't, you knew you had to wait until Violet and your brother were done pleading their story and waiting for the council's approval. If they didn’t approve,- well you didn’t even want to think of the possibilities or even actual death your friends would endure.   

     Finally after what seemed like hours, formation hand ended and their story was believed and riders were frantically making their own decisions about what they had just heard and what choice they wanted to make. You could care less about that as you and Garrick were each trying to move through the sea of cadets to get to each other; your brother and everyone else close behind him. “Little one, my little one.” Garrick said softly wrapping his arms around your waist both of you with tears falling down your face. “I’m so sorry.” You managed to mumbled into Garrick’s chest as you felt your brother place a reassuring hand on your back. “You don’t have to apologize. We are the ones that need to apologize. I should have let you help but you are my little sister and keeping you safe is my number priority.Your hands left Garrick’s back and found themselves on your brothers. “I almost lost you, I almost lost both of you.” You said quietly one arm reaching out for Garrick as well. “I love you both, I love you both so much. Just don’t be dicks and let me help next time.” This had earned a chuckle from both of the boys as Garrick pulled you away from your brother and fully back into his arms as you wrapped your legs around his waist. 

    “I shouldn’t be worried about Aetos should I?” He asked through a chuckle. You shook your head which was buried into the crock of his neck as you took in his familiar scent. I raised up your head to look at the love of your life and take in his hazel eyes and pushed a loose curl back into place.“I love you and only you. You're mine and I’m yours. Always and forever.” You said softly and rested your foreheads together as Garrick repeated “I love you and only you. You're mine and I’m yours. Always and forever.” “Oh please gag me.” Imogen chidded from behind both of you, which had earned a soft chuckle from everyone nearby.

A/N: This was my first request! I hope I did it justice and that you enjoyed it whoever the anon was! Thank you again for sending it to my inbox. I’m always taking requests!

[barbiesdelicioustoes]

Academic rival!Scaramouche x Barista Fem!Reader.

Summary: Somehow, fate finds your suffering very amusing and blatantly cursed you with unfortunate events that involves your detested nemesis.

A/!: a crust of rdirt went uo iny m eyelids and RUINED MY PRECIOUS SLEEP FOR 3 DAYS STRAIGHT BECAUSE I KEPT SCRATCHING IR– so yeah, wrote this with a glossy red eye but its ok. oh and, alot of cursing!!

The chimes of the bell snaps you out of your reverie, rushing to the counter to tend to the customer. Working part-time during exam seasons truly is a nightmare, you've been running all day due to numerous students flooding the café to prepare for the examination.

A group of three highschoolers enthusiastically greets you and orders a few pastries and confectionery, though it did take a while due to their squabbles on what to pick. One named Hu tao aggressively tugs at the sleeves of their friend when he comes back to order another set of 5 popsicles for the third time.

An hour had passed, and the sunlight that once illuminated the surroundings slowly dissipates into the shadows as the once bright sky turns into an inky hue of blue. With that, you finally called it a day. A colleague calls for your name, telling you to enter the manager's room.

Upon your entry, your manager—grandma—flashes you a fond smile that spoke gratefulness. In return, a small smile crept to your face as you slightly bow at her. A gentle sweep of her index finger gestures you to the wooden stool.

With a mellow voice, she asks, "My dear, I'm planning on hiring a new worker. Is that okay?"

The unease in her tone makes you ponder on what was so wrong about hiring this new worker she spoke of, nonetheless you ignore it and chirp with a gleeful smile, "Of course, it's not a problem." And your grandmother returns your smile with fondness. "Expect to meet him next month, okay?"

"Mhm!"

--

"...What is the answer for this question–"

Not even two seconds later, you raise your hand amidst the crowd of students still scribbling in their notebooks. What you didn't notice however was another hand also raised confidently a split second prior to yours, and with this, your teacher lets out an exasperated sigh.

"Scaramouche, what's the answer?" You turn to the direction the teacher points, and your nemesis smirks at your glare. "Ten." He confidently answers and much to your dismay, he was right, and your teacher confirms that by a single word, "Correct."

A following of questions was asked along with you and your nemesis constantly battling each other by who can answer the most questions and who gets the most right answers, even your classmates could barely get a hold of a question because of how fast you two would raise your hand.

And after a whole hour of defeated glares and triumphant chuckles, the teacher congratulates you two for being the most annoying active students out of all he has ever stumbled upon as he prepares to go to his next class.

You and Scaramouche exchange disdainful glares for the last time you see him for the day.

--

Three days pass by and exams were over in the blink of an eye, but the current question stands, "who will get the exclusive book you and your nemesis have been eyeing?"

The two of you happen to have stumbled the same problem back a month ago, you wanted the thrilling novel that became your daily rants and Scaramouche also wanted the same novel out of curiosity and spite, mostly from spite though.

And since there was only one left in the bookstore, the librarian easily solved the problem by reserving it for the two of you but was left surprised by the mutual refusal. The poor librarian had witnessed the entire altercation between the two rivals, however it soon ended with your final conclusion,

"Whoever gets a bigger score than the other by the end of the exam, gets the book."

Hell week, at last, was over and you can finally get your beloved book. So with a deep breath and your glare that twinkled with fire and desperation to attain the book, you counted from one to three.

"One.. two... three."

"One hundred!" – "Ninety nine."

A wave of jubilation washed away the prior nervousness that lingered in the pits of your stomach as you stuck your tounge out at the frozen man infront of you.

Noticing his dejected form, you paid for the book and lightly tap his shoulder.

"I'll let you borrow later, hm?"

The sky is painted with a deep orange blended with a soft pink hue, along with the clouds that reflected the color. You take your phone out from your pocket, holding it up in the sky as you move around to get a good angle. When you let your phone down to admire the pictures, its camera catches a particular figure you're not so excited to see.

Scaramouche halts in his tracks, equally confused as you. Averting your gaze, you went back to ignoring him and take more pictures of the ethereal sky. You did try your best to ignore him fully but seeing that he went to the direction you were supposed to go, you can't help but presume that his house may be near the cafe.

But you find the idea ridiculously irritating so you wave it off and stroll towards the café.

Half an hour has passed, the café finally comes in view after leisurely walking around, and kicking rocks to take your time. Inside the cafe is flooded with an unusual long line of people and your colleague going here and there while displaying a wavering smile at the overwhelming amount of people.

A chime of the bell catches everyone's attention and all of a sudden, you feel very unwelcomed. An apologetic smile crosses your features, before dropping once you recognize their uniforms. Nevertheless, the urge to escape their gaze continuously bothers you as you place your ID in the table.

Your colleague—Ayaka—pulls the edge of your bag, stumbling you towards her, and whispers into your ear, "The new worker is here!" Then, a flash of your grandmother's words courses through you. You remain still in your position, processing what your colleague and grandmother told you.

'Ah. That's why.'

Though it did answer a few questions, it failed to answer the reason why there is a huge line of people from your school. And so, you glance at the crowd before curiously asking Ayaka, "Why is there a lot of people though?"

"Uhm–the newbie is sorta attractive and a lot of girls pass by here so they saw him and then they decided to enter the cafe to see him."

'Oh. Now that makes sense.'

"So it's his turn today?" Ayaka nods her head with a hum. Your curiosity was now deemed satisfied therefore there was no time to be idling around, and you hurriedly run into the manager's room. Completely missing the new worker's shocked gaze that followed your figure.

As usual, your grandmother greets with optimism despite the galling squeals outside and carefully props your bag near her table. "The café sure is lively at night." She mutters, as you start to change out of your uniform. "I can't even imagine what it might be like tomorrow." A chuckle escapes her chapped lips, and the sound relieves you.

You open the door with a click after changing, taking a deep breath to prepare for the horde of people, only to be greeted with two girls who can't stop squealing and giggling at, what you presumed to be, the worker. The sight is annoying as it is.

So with garnered courage, you stand by the worker's side and attempt to shoo off the girls with an indignant glare. Of course, it did not work so to top it off, "Get out or I'll ban you from coming here." With a sweet tone coated with sarcasm, still not aware of the perplexed gaze your fellow new colleague sent you. As expected, the girls run off towards the door in fear of never seeing their crush again.

"Well now that's that," followed by a huff as you place your hands on your hips, and you proudly steer your gaze at the poor newbie, "So, how are you liking–" only for your nemesis to come in view, an astounded expression splayed across his features instead of the usual scowl you see in his face everyday.

The abrupt silence even concerned the other worker as you two stared at each other simultaneously as if asking, "why are you here?"

At last, Ayaka shatters the intense tension by accidentally turning off the lights then apologizing sheepishly. "Sorry, [Name]. I pity our new barista though." She jokingly says to lighten the mood, but ceased to continue due to the harsh glare you've been giving him in which he simply averts it all.

After a good 30 minutes of deliberately avoiding Scaramouche as you clean the café, the bothersome alarm beeps on your phone and you rush to shut it up. "Hey, [Name], shouldn't you go home by now?" Ayaka asks, giggling at your disheveled state.

"Huh? Ah, ye–" You suddenly shiver, feeling someone's scorching leers behind you. 'Guess I still have to answer some questions.'

"Nope, I'll go home with our dear new barista here." You innocently smile, and she tilts her head, wondering if you're being sarcastic or not. But she shrugs it off and goes to the staff room to change her clothes without a clue on the tense atmosphere.

Scaramouche idly stands near the counter, watching every move you make. His fierce expression reminiscents you of a cat that harbors a murderous intent, and is off to lacerate your skin with its claws. But in your case, his glare alone pricks tiny needles on your skin.

A few minutes pass of you tending to your tasks while Scaramouche simply expresses interest at the utensils to distract himself from maliciously staring at you for too long. You can practically feel just how awkward it feels right now, with the way both of you occasionally exchange glances, seeminly wanting to approach the other and throw unwanted questions.

But then a thought strucks you, 'It's just Scaramouche, what am I so scared for?'

And so, you chuck your nervousness down to the murky depths of your mind as you reluctantly approach him. His eyes meets yours and you part your mouth, "how did get you here?"

He chuckles, subtly amused by the way you outrightly ask him with the same question that's been bugging him perpetually since he has seen you in the same outfit as him. But as usual, his indifferent and snarky façade takes over and an audacious scoff escapes his lips.

"Curious, are we?"

"Oh don't kid around, I know you're also curious."

A click of his tounge confirms another of your curiosity, but it does not sate your confusion. "Well?" You try again, and this time he finally answers, "the manager offered my Aunt this job, but she refused so she gave it to me instead." He explains, hoping you wouldn't ask him any more questions. He's inwardly sweating bullets at this point.

A small smile creeps to your face as your hand reaches to pat his shoulder, "Haha, what are you so nervous for?" – "What a two-face." Of course, he had to ruin the mood you had set up to ease the tension. A vein nearly pops in your temple when he pushes your hand off of his shoulder.

'Asshole, I was just trying to be nice.'

And Ayaka comes strolling in and is confused at your foul mood.

--

Ah, right. Did I ever mention that luck seems to stray far away from your direction?

The very second you open the door, your friends pull you and roughly drags you to your seats. And before you can even garner a thought, Your friend surrounds you with an aura that terrifies you, one that usually calls for any type of lecture for something you've done. But instead, their eyes glimmer with the very same confusion as you have.

"Dude, are you and Scara dating?" Aether questions, disregarding your utterly bewildered state. Heizou, the one who dragged you, bursts into laughter at the way your expression twists to a scrunched up nose and mouth ajar at the absurd nonsensical question your friend had sputtered.

You're about to retort when Kokomi fishes her phone out of her pink bag and shows you a photo of both you and your nemesis smiling and conversing like a pair of couple, very nearly choking in your own spit when you see the amount of likes just below the photo.

Out of all ludicrous bullshit you've heard and seen throughout your entire college life, the post and Aether's question easily declares itself as "top 1 bullshit of all time." Shame and humiliation engulfed your prior serene mood as your group shows genuine concern when you slump in the chair and make no sign of life.

You are utterly fucked. Both in school and at the café.

Aether and Heizou scrutinizes your figure, but does not make a move on your miserable corpse whose soul decided to take a break from the divine curses someone has casted on you.

"Yikes, imagine being shipped by your three-year rival." Aether chuckles, poking your arm as an attempt to cheer you up.

"I'm gonna cry my ass off when this turns into an academic rivals to lovers trope."

"Add the 137k words with mutual pining and slow burn."

"Don't forget the last updated at 2016," Heizou adds, sneaking a glance at your dying state, "Still ongoing, by the way."

The three of them continues to chatter about your situation, occasionally giving you pats to comfort you. But your panicked mind can barely have the time to think about them anyway, as they were dulled under the sound of countless thoughts spiralling around your head.

You only pray that no one will pester you on your way home.

--

Of course, you are proven wrong.

If you were to describe your journey from your classroom to the gate alone, it was certainly like you were some sort of famous celebrity who tried to wander around, inconsiderate of the fact that people will undoubtedly recognize your face and interrogate personal matters. Luckily, you managed to get pass and deal with them smoothly with the assistance of your friends.

Just when you reach the street where the café resides, a few featherlight waterdrops trickles at your arm, alerting you of an incoming downpour. Sliding down the other sleeve of your backpack, your hand reaches behind and slides inside as you rummage through your things to find an umbrella.

Notebooks, pencil cases, papers–

You don't have an umbrella, instantly recalling the spot you had placed the item, specifically the shoe rack at the café. Before you could curse about it, the light rain mockingly laughs at you and the prior raindrops turn into something much, much more heavier, soaking your hair first and then your entire body.

'Haha, what the heck?'

In your peripheral vision, a stray cat stares at you with dilated pupils under the protective shade of a rooftop as unwanted shock refuses to let you move. The cat's soft meows finally eases your frustrated mind, and you hurry to take cover underneath a tree beside the sign that shows the name of the street.

You press your foot further into the sole of your shoes and it lets out a squeaky sound that further irritates you more as you sputter, "I'm very offended, mothernature. what did I ever do to you?" And as if it heard you, a deafening roar of thunder attacks your ears so close behind you as a warning. You take it as your cue to close your mouth shut.

The sounds of pitter-patter rain is soothing, even though you had quite a ton of obnoxious events today, it effortlessly washes all of the pent up emotions that you had to hold in. 'It wouldn't be bad to stay here for awhile,' your body crouch down and you hug your knees, careful to not let your skirt get wet underneath you.

Your shift was nearly at 8:00pm anyways, and it was barely the start of the evening, so it wouldn't hurt to be a little late, right?

For a brief moment, your eyes absorb the breathtaking view infront of you when the streetlights turns on. It was a natural habit for you to remember the schedule on when the streetlights switches on, and when it turns off with how frequent you've been coming.

And so, that alone tells you that it is currently 6:00pm but a thought to start moving had not crossed your mind.

Next to your right, is an uphill street that leads you to the supposed destination and luckily, the area around the café is mostly filled with wild animals in the forest that the head of the street sternly restricted vehicles to prevent extinction. Which resulted in people not liking the rules so they blatantly ignored the street.

That lessens the risk of kidnappers appearing to take yo–

A faint splatter of water causes you to rapidly whip your head to the source of sound while unpleasant emotions swirls around your stomach and the feeling of it tightens your chest with nothing but dread. The prior sounds of raindrop is muted over the erratic rhythm of your heartbeat.

A short stature starts to loom out of darkness and prowls towards you. Adrenaline begins to flood your veins, eyes glued to the shady person in case they do something funny. After multiple seconds of anticipating any action they might do, the dim light of the lamp finally reveals the figure, and its widened indigo eyes catches your panicked gaze.

And for a moment, a twinkle of guilt sparks in his irises before scurrying in your direction. "You idiot! Do you even know how worried your grandma is!?" He exclaims, before freezing when he notices your damp hair.

He stops in his tracks when he's close enough beside you, reaching a hand out to you with a closed umbrella in his palm. With a faint click of his tounge, he hesitantly mutters, "...you look like you got dumped."

"Still as annoying as ever, I see." You breathe out a deep sigh, ignoring his outstretched arm and turning your head to the much more interesting puddle infront of you.

"Are you going to take it or not?"

"Isn't it your shift today?"

He grunts, "stop dodging my question."

Rolling your eyes, you shoot up from your seat and begrudgingly accept the umbrella. "How do you know my grandmother?" You ask as you open the umbrella, he darts his eyes to you then to the umbrella, "I.. Ayaka told me." That receives him a short nod of your head, together with a hum.

Both of you start heading towards the café in silence, albeit strained, it was more comfortable compared to the times where it was unbearable due to the contempt and hatred that lingered in the air. The heavy downpour died down shortly after you started to utilize your umbrella, even Scaramouche surprisingly noticed and mockingly commented on your unfortunate luck.

"Oh yeah," you turn around to face him, "where were you earlier at school?"

Scaramouche furrows his eyebrows, and murmurs a simple excuse, "I had to help my aunt." He tilts his head slightly upwards and gestures for you go forward. Even so, you strangely feel the urge to converse normally with him today. "What's she like?" His mouth parts to answer but the squeaking of your shoes interrupts him.

"...we should hurry up."

You only let out small 'yeah' as you glare at your damped and noisy sneakers to shut up.

--

After that incident, everything became more unexpectedly pleasant. You used to be convinced that there were more to come and haunt you with far more insignificant bothersome occasions, however they never showed up.

Like for an instance, the dating rumours that made you have sleepless nights slowly died down due to your friend's terrifying threats and warnings to leave you alone. Actually, knowing their reputation as a band, Ayaka covertly requested to end the rumours once and for all wherein they all complied.

And then, several weeks later, his friend, Childe, frequently started to joyously visit the café accompanied by his younger siblings who soughts for unwelcomed trouble and confectionaries that will surely impose a great danger for their teeth due to the increasingly alarming amount of candies they purchase everyday.

Since he started to visit, more people began to flood the cafe, much to your grandmother's satisfaction. Most of his visits consists of bugging Scaramouche with his strange tales and hilarious stories, and yours along with Ayaka's presence doesn't go unnoticed. He often makes you two join their conversation, all of which are mostly unsuccessful due to how busy you are.

---

Your relationship with Scaramouche progressed into something you've never even imagined before; a decent friendship.

It initially started when a stern substitute teacher deliberately paired you with him, paying no mind of the brief gasps of shock and faint 'ooh' of your fellow classmates. He reasoned when you both pleaded for another partner, "what? it's not like you're going to commit something illegal, right?" And all of the students in the room had their jaw dropped into the ground at the bravery of their teacher.

Worse yet, this project had points that will noticeably increase your grades and it needed two people for it to finish. So as you silently cursed at fate, you reluctantly obliged to his request to meet up at the café and get it done.

"You're not supposed to do it like that–!" He says as he snatches the pen from your grasp, scrawling away the numbers that you have made. Your gaze oddly lingered at your fingers that had initiated subtle contact with his, as he does his own solution.

Immediately after a few minutes, he curtly stopped upon finishing and looked at you dead in the eye, successfully tearing your gaze away from your hand. A puckish smirk grew on your lips at his dumbfounded state of realization. "It is like that, you airhead."

Most of the two days was blatant arguing and disagreeing each other's idea out in public instead of actually acting on doing the project. But nevertheless, it was finished within a week and the teacher that assigned you both was satisfied with the immaculate presentation.

The other adults heard of it and began to blatantly pair the two of you, as if they hadn't seen the altercations that had occured between the two of you in the past. Your group quietly bursted into laughter when they once witnessed the strained smiles and stiff interactions infront of the amazed yet oblivious teachers.

--

Whenever one of you get sick, the teacher would hand them the other's worksheet, telling them to give it to the other once they feel better. The first time that happened was when you were sick with an abnormally high fever and it was the weekend when you got better.

A ring in your doorbell stops you from whatever you were doing and you scramble to open the door. Lo and behold, your detested nemesis greets you with a sweet sarcastic grin and crossed arms. Despite the gradual pounding of your heartbeat, you yell, "why the heck are you here!?" His prior expression drops and was now replaced with a frown.

"Why are you so noisy in the morning? Relax, I'm just here to give you your worksheets." Before you can open your mouth, he quickly adds, "Heizou sent Kazuha your address and Kazuha sent it to me so I can give these to you."

'Does he know how to read minds or what?'

He hands out a folder with your name neatly written in a small font at the top, and his gaze points at the item. Then an idea pops up in your head and a small smile graces your lips as you take the folder from his hands, "do you wanna come in?"

That resulted to unintelligible words slipping from his mouth as a vague yet noticeable rosy color slowly tint his pale cheeks. You repeatedly blink at his reaction, wondering if you had said something wrong. His mouth thins into a line upon noticing your reaction and attempts to obscure his flustered expression by coughing into his fist (in which he fails miserably).

"Yeah, sure. Do you have lavender melon?"

"Your whole face is red–"

"Shut up. Do you have the fruit or not?"

"...your face is still–"

"Shut up!"

During that very same day, your mother unexpectedly enters your room and threw you an impish snicker when Scaramouche hastily introduces himself as your friend, missing the subtle blush in your ears at your mother's knowing actions.

After that, you randomly ask him while watching a horror movie if he really was your friend and he carelessly confirms by a tiny nod of his head, too engrossed at the story to ponder about it.

It is currently spring.

Exactly ten months after Scaramouche made its appearance on the café and the fortuitous events that led both of you no choice but to tolerate fate's puerile schemes.

However, it seems the two of you unconsciously wandered off on your own since fate left to deal with other matters.

You've met his mother, he's met yours. He barges into your house every week, and you crash into his once a month (only once a month because of his peculiar insistence on not letting you visit). He doesn't call you with insults that typically pissed you to no end, and you constantly stop yourself from spitting out vulgar words directed to him.

He once slept at your place, you once ate at his. He's slept at your shoulder thrice while you slept on his lap twice. He only calls you idiot, dumbass and the specific nickname that he shamelessly stole from you; airhead. But as a not-so apology, he gave you the permission to call him; Kunikuzushi.

With every tale you share to your friends, it still remains a mystery to them as to why both of you never bothered to step further into the line of something more than just a friendship. Actually, it's more like, you will cross the line but in order to cross that, you have to acknowledge your feelings.

And the problem is, you're too afraid to admit your feelings to avoid hurtful rejection despite the painfully patent signs of reciprocated desire.

And sometimes, just sometimes, you reluctantly allow the myriad of what ifs plague your somnolent mind as the gleams of moonlight serves as an admirable scene to let your mind wander.

--

Scaramouche vehemently eyes the white envelope on the table with a wrinkled nose and knitted eyebrows. His eyes darts from the love letter to the giddy smile plastered on your face. After minutes of silence, Scaramouche heaves out a sigh, "[Name], I told you to reject the love letters."

Your prior smile drops and you excessively roll your eyes at his words, "Isn't Lumine fine though?" Your voice, albeit small, emanates with genuine admiration and envy, and he absolutely loathes the ardent words that doesn't deserve to be coated with your awestruck tone.

Kazuha did always tell him to confess sooner or the privilege of simply being with you inevitably slips from his grasp. And yet, he does nothing. Not when you look dazzling while you babble about how lovely Lumine is, not when you blindly push him to her with huge expectations, not when your smile is enough to stop him from boldly rejecting her love.

But still, if he doesn't do anything at this point, he's really going to lose you.

.. atleast that's what he thinks.

He clicks his tounge in an unnecessary volume, "throw it away." As he slides the paper away from him. "Aw, come on. Just try to read it, please?" He doesn't even spare you a glimpse, his eyes resolutely glued to the wall beside him.

"Fine," you mumble in defeat as you shove the envelope in your bag.

"Why are you so insistent about this anyway?" His prying eyes lock onto yours, crossing his arms. "I don't even like her, I'm pretty sure you're aware of that."

'I don't know either. Perhaps I'm just using this as an opportunity to get rid of whatever I feel when I'm with you..' is what you want to say but all that comes out of your mouth is a half hearted chuckle, "both of you suit each other, so why not just give it a try?" His look speaks disbelief at your reason, fully unconvinced and more suspicious of you.

"I'm not believing that."

"You never believe my words though." You lean back on your chair, breathing out a sigh.

"That's because it's purely nonsense."

"Then is it still nonsense if I said I liked you–" For a split second after the abrupt halt, your mind blanks. And the next, as if it was instinct, your palm swiftly grasps your mouth close, mind stirring into a whirlpool of uncountable thoughts.

'Did he hear me? I'm sure I just whispered it but still–'

Even the ruffles of the trees is audible from outside whereas a sound nor word was completely gone from the seat across you. And you would've thought he mercilessly left you if it wasn't for the visible shoe underneath the table.

So with mustered up courage, you reluctantly glimpse at him with the tinest crane of your head. And you swear your breath got taken away when he comes in view with widened eyes who cuaght your gaze the second you looked at him, the same rosy colour that went up from his neck to his porcelain cheeks, and a quivering parted mouth.

Even when your heart is hammering against your chest and the heat that is gradually flaring your ears, you subconsciously mutter, "You.. you look like an idiot, Kuni."

This time, he doesn't remind you of a malicious cat anymore. He reminds you of that one teenage boy who confessed to their crush and he ended up getting flustered with all the stuttering and flushed faces. But in your case, you're the one who carelessly confessed and yet you're the only one who feels rather calm?

Perhaps after seeing that expression of his, all your doubts and anxieties flew out of the window and practically answered all the questions in your heart. After a few moments of complete silence, he still remains frozen and you have already calmed down while he looks like the humanoid of a ripe tomato.

"Raiden Scaramouche?" Nope.

"My about to be four-year nemesis?" Still not it.

"Kunikuzushi?" Okay, he's still staring at you with his mouth slightly open and you worry if a fly goes inside it.

"I'm serious, it's been five minutes since you had that expression, Kuni." You stood up from your seat and walked to his seat as you carefully reach for his forehead to assess his temperature.

He flinched and then grabbed your wrist so unexpectedly. "Did you finally–" "Say it again." His tone is hushed and you can't take your eyes away from his flushed face. You respond, raising a brow, "Say what?" – "What you said earlier."

You blink twice, wondering what he's talking about before realizing he meant your accidental confession. You can feel your ears burning at his request but you've already made a fool out of yourself anyways.

"I said, is it still nonsense if I said I liked you?"

You already know his answer by the way his irises sparkled with hope upon hearing your words.

"Alright, Childe, pay up."

Childe blinks at the shorter man, "what? Why?"

"[Name] just called me saying she's dating him now."

Three heads simultaneously turned their heads towards Heizou, demanding an explaination with their blazing eyes. "Woah woah, calm down," he defensively waves both of his hands, "[Name] ended the call after saying that, is all."

The blond widely grins as Childe grunts while taking out his wallet. "I told you, Lumine would be a great help!"

"Huh? Lumine?" Kazuha spins his gaming chair towards Aether who's too busy counting the amount of money paper in his hands and therefore cannot answer. Deflates upon realizing he won't answer then perks up when Kokomi provides the explanation for him.

"Aether basically asked Xingqiu to write five love letters, and then after, he told Lumine about his plan which.." she places her finger on her chin, "Oh. He told Lumine to act like she's inlove with Scaramouche and give him the letters through [Name]."

"What about Aether's bet?"

"Oh that? Aether had a bet with Childe that both of them will confess by the fourth letter."

Heizou chuckles at the ginger who's glaring daggers at the blond, "they really just needed a little push." All of them nod their head in agreement.

"Also Childe, you owe me Katsu Sandwich."

A/N: if you use your brain, you can see how my writing style literally changes in each scene. Ov well, I wrote it in different days anywahs.

[tearsfortheyouth]

OBSESSION - Steve Kemp, Part One

Oh lord help me, what did I get myself into. Here’s a multi-part Steve Kemp fic that’s been on my mind for a while.

Five months into her best friend’s disappearance, (Y/N) meets someone new, and for the first time in months she feels as if she can finally breathe again. She never thought she’d become the newest obsession of a charming psychopathic cannibal.

- WARNING(S): NON-CON/DUB-CON, grief, drug abuse, kidnapping, Steve Kemp is a red flag himself, cannibalism, manipulation, blood

I hurried down the busy sidewalk, my hand gripping a thin piece of fabric as I shoved through people. “Sorry!” I called behind me as I accidentally collided with someone’s shoulder, sending the man an apologetic smile.

The crispy morning air nipped at my nose, my cheeks a gentle red. My lips were chapped, the chilly autumn air kissing them harshly. Finally, I reached her destination, and I swung open the door, the bell chiming from above me.

The smell of coffee filled the air, and I inhaled, breathing heavily as I moved behind the counter, muttering an apology to my store manager.

The older woman studied me. “Thanks for deciding to grace us with your presence,” she dryly quipped, her eyes flicking back down towards the milk she was currently steaming.

“I’m sorry, Mallory,” I breathed, tying my long hair into a messy ponytail. “I slept past my alarm.” Quickly, I wrapped my black apron around my waist, tying it into a neat bow behind my back.

Mallory hummed, unamused, before calling out the name of the customer, placing the finished beverage onto the handoff counter. She turned to face me, a thin eyebrow raised. “This is the fourth time this month, (Y/N). You can’t keep doing this. You were scheduled almost an hour ago.”

I winced slightly, my lip tucked between my teeth. “I’m supposed to get my medicine tomorrow. I swear it won't happen again.”

Mallory nodded as I got to work with another order, placing a croissant into the oven. From behind me, I could feel her gaze burning a hole into the back of my head. I ignored her, my gaze focused on the pastry in the oven.

“Have the nightmares gotten any better?” She asked carefully, a sympathetic smile tugging at her lips.

I remained silent, bagging up the croissant and calling out the name. “It doesn’t matter, Mallory,” I quickly brushed off, sending her a quick warning glance.

Mallory was silent, a sigh escaping her. “Okay.” She wiped off the counter with a washcloth, cleaning the spilt coffee from the rush earlier. “Well, I’ll be in the back getting some stuff done. Call me if you need me.”

I nodded quickly, sending her a small smile. She disappeared through the door, and I let out a shaky sigh.

Sleeping at night wasn’t the easiest. Since the day she had disappeared, the nightmares hadn’t ceased. The day she disappeared, the color seemed to drain from my world. It had been five months — five long months. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat. Hell, I couldn’t even close her eyes without seeing her youthful face, her eyes filled with the rarest kind of joy. Happiness like that didn’t exist anymore, not in anyone. But Lilith wasn’t just anyone. She was my sister, my best friend, my savior. She was everything to me.

I didn’t want to believe she was gone and never coming back. I didn’t want to accept a life without her light. A life without her was a life of loneliness, a life of misery and suffering that she wanted no part of.

After the first month of Lilith being missing, it seemed as if the city forgot about her. She was just another woman in a city of millions. Hundreds of people go missing every year, and Lilith was no exception. It seemed as if those who knew me were walking on eggshells, afraid to bring it up.

It was as if she no longer existed.

Lilith Marie had been forgotten. No family, no friends, she was an outsider.

She was an outsider — she was like me.

——————————-

Four hours into my shift, the coffee shop had begun to settle down as customers began to hurry to their jobs. It had been a minute since someone had ordered. To not seem like I was standing around, I carefully wiped at the counter, the washcloth damp against my skin.

My black shirt had since been stained with powder from the pastries, caramel drizzle and coffee stains painting my pants in patterns.

Knowing the slow pace of the shop was only temporary, I set the rag down with a sigh, beginning to stock the fridges with milks and other ingredients I would need to make it through another rush.

Just as I was placing a new almond milk jug into the fridge, the bell rang, signaling that a customer had walked in.

I turned, bumping the fridge door shut with my hip before making my way to the counter, my eyes on the small tablet to take orders. “Hi,” I greeted monotonously, forcing a smile on my tired face. “What can I get started for you?”

Glancing up, blue eyes met my own. A man stood tall on the other side of the counter, a charming smile tugging at his pink lips. “Good morning,” he smiled, a hand coming to rub at his chin.

He was a good looking man—a shockingly handsome man, even. His eyes seemed to glance right through me, dark hair adorning his face. He was older, maybe a good six or seven years older than myself, but it didn’t take away from his attractiveness. In fact, being older seemed to suit him.

I found myself staring for too long, and I blushed slightly, my eyes falling back down to the iPad in my hand.

“Wait a minute,” he began, leaning forward slightly as he gazed at me carefully. “Do I know you?”

My brows furrowed, and I looked back up at him. Did I know him? He didn’t seem familiar, though it wasn’t like I spoke to anyone anyways.

Slowly, I shook my head, my lips parting. “Um, I don’t think so?” I stated, confusion laced in my voice. “I don’t recognize you.”

His eyes examined me a bit further now, his dark brows knitted closely together as he thought. Finally, he seemed to come to a conclusion, and his eyes lit up slightly. “You ran into me this morning.”

I blushed further, the memory of accidentally shoulder-checking someone replaying in my head. Dear god, I thought to myself, embarrassment filling me.

“I am so sorry, I was late to work and was kind of in a hurry,” I quickly defended myself, trying to save myself from further embarrassment.

He chuckled at my words, his hand held out in a surrendering manner. “Don’t worry,” he replied, a smile on his handsome face. “Been there done that many times before.”

A sigh of relief escaped me, and I let out an awkward laugh, a hand coming to brush a flour-coated strand of hair away from my face.

“Besides, I can’t complain about a pretty barista literally KO-ing me on the streets. I’m livin’ the dream,” he joked, and I could feel my cheeks growing hot.

Male attention was slightly foreign to me. I had been an awkward kid all my childhood, and I didn’t start getting male attention until I had graduated college. It felt…strange to be flirted with.

“I really am sorry about that,” I said quickly, a nervous laugh falling from my lips. I didn’t know what to say other than apologize.

I felt warm under his gaze, and I wiped my palms on my apron once more.

He waved my words off. “Don’t worry about it. As I said, livin’ the dream.” He smiled. “I’ll take a large black coffee.”

Quickly, I punched in his order. “Did you want any cream or sugar in there?”

“No thanks. The bitter taste wakes me up,” he explained, pulling his wallet out of his pocket.

I hummed at his reply, telling him the price and taking his card. Quietly, I asked for his name, to which he told me “Steve.”

Steve.

“It’ll be out in just a second,” I told him simply, and he held a thumbs up, sending me a smile as he took a seat at one of the tables.

Steve seemed nice.

I was quick to make his coffee, careful to not splash the hot liquid onto my skin as I poured it into a cup. Setting it onto the handoff counter, I called his name. Quickly, he came to the counter, striding towards his coffee and picking it up.

“Thank you…” he trailed off, his brows knitted together.

“(Y/N),” I told him, smiling softly at the man.

He said my name quietly, as if seeing how the name felt on his tongue. “(Y/N)…” he smiled, nodding his head. “Thank you, (Y/N).”

And just like that, he was gone.

I stared at his retreating figure, feeling somewhat confused and embarrassed. He strode from my eyesight outside, disappearing down the block.

“Hmm..” I hummed, brows furrowed.

“Who was that?’ Mallory’s voice sounded from behind me, and I jumped slightly at the sudden noise. Turning towards her, I rolled my eyes.

“No one. Can I take my lunch break now?”

————————————

It was late when I returned home to my apartment. The night had settled in, blackening the streets and casting an eerie glow into my small apartment.

Closing the door behind me, I locked it, a tired sigh escaping me.

My apartment was small, but it was enough. I had made it into a cozy home, and it was certainly mine.

Setting my keys onto the table, I took out my ponytail, letting my long hair fall to my waist.

Though I was exhausted, I knew I wouldn’t get much sleep tonight.

It was the same thing every night: turn on the lights, feed the cat, lay in bed, and stare up at the ceiling.

Sighing, I went into my bathroom, silent as I began to run a bath. As I waited for the water to fill the bath, I undressed myself, rinsing my face with the cold water of the sink.

Looking into the mirror, I frowned slightly, my pink lips pouted. Slowly, I forced herself to smile, watching as my lips turned upwards.

I cringed.

My smile no longer reached my eyes. It was as if my eyes had lost all life, like a fog had clouded them. My smile dropped, and I bit my cheek in disappointment.

I missed being happy. I longed to feel something again, and yet no matter how hard I tried, nothing worked. It was like an empty void had taken hold of me and everyday, it felt as if I were falling further and further into the ocean of depression.

Running a hand through my hair, I moved it so it was out of my face before stepping away from the counter.

Turning the hot water off, I silently climbed in, skin burning from the heat. The burning soon melted away, being replaced with instant warmth that flooded through my bones. It was like a warm blanket had engulfed me, comforting me.

Ever since the disappearance, I had found comfort in the nightly baths.

Opening my eyes to stare at the ceiling, I let my head rest on the rim of the tub, a breath escaping my lips.

When my bath was over, I dressed myself, my cat meowing loudly as she begged me to feed her. I leaned over, smiling softly and giving her a pet. “Are you hungry, my love?”

She stared up at me and meowed, and I giggled, giving her some kitty food before returning back to my room. It was almost midnight now, and I yawned, throwing myself tiredly onto the bed in the middle of my room.

A few minutes later, as my cat curled up on my pillow beside my head, my blinking began to slow, and finally, I drifted into a light sleep.

Unfortunately, the nightmares were quick to follow.

————————-

A week came and went, and then another, and another, and soon, autumn turned into winter.

The medication achieved its goal of helping me sleep, and it kept the nightmares at bay. Since the day I had picked them up, I hadn’t dreamt. Soon, it became easier to close my eyes without seeing her face.

Lilith no longer haunted my body, mind and soul. Though she had left a scar, a clear indication that she had been there, it was getting easier to breathe.

Lilith would always be with me, for my heart was filled with her and her alone. But for the first time in months, my heart had become my own once more.

I was working an evening shift at the coffee shop today, sweeping up the floors and ridding it of the coffee grounds that seemed to plague it. It had been a partially slow day, and Mallory had gone home early to be with her children for the holidays. Christmas was a week from today, and though the streets of New York were bustling with last minute shoppers, the coffee shop I worked at had been the exception.

Dumping the dustpan into the trash, I heaved an annoyed sigh. The trash was filled to the brim.

Taking advantage of the completely empty coffee shop, I decided to take it out, tying the plastic into a knot and lifting it from the bin. Making my way outside, the chilly air licked at my skin, goosebumps rising as I strode to the dumpster a couple yards away. It was dark outside, and it was almost time to close up the coffee shop.

The trash was heavy, and I was just barely able to hold it up to my hips. My breathing blew up into puffs of smoke, the gravel beneath my feet crunching as I hurried to the dumpster.

“Hey, (Y/N)!” A voice called from behind me, and I jumped, a scream escaping my chapped lips.

“Fuck,” I breathed, my eyes wide as they met a pair of icy blue ones.

The man before me was the very same one who stood in the coffee shop weeks ago, the same man who I had bumped into on the streets that morning — and yet, for the life of me, I couldn’t remember his name.

“Sorry! Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he chuckled, catching up to me. Seeing I was struggling to carry the trash bag, he quickly reached out to help me. “Here, I got it.”

Before I could protest, he had grabbed the bag from me, his strong arms easily lifting it up. I blinked, muttering a quiet thank you, feeling slightly guilty for not remembering his name.

“What…what are you doing here?” I asked him, walking with him towards the dumpster.

He turned to cast me a charming smile, his white teeth flashing. “I wanted a coffee, but I noticed the store was empty. Had to make sure you weren’t killed by some psychopath,” he grinned.

I nodded quietly, my brows furrowing.

How had he known I was working…?

“Yeah, well, I’m all good,” I awkwardly replied, breathing into my hands to warm them up as the man threw the heavy bag into the trash.

“Come on, let's get inside. My god, you’re shaking.” Quickly, he shrugged off his jacket, placing it over my shaking frame, and I cringed uncomfortably.

“Oh, um, thank you,” I muttered, looking to the floor beneath our feet as we hurried back into the store.

He smiled in return, moving in front of me to open the door, waiting for me to go inside first. The bell chimed from above us, the cafe still empty. The people on the streets had retreated, given that it was now fairly late at night. Glancing at the clock, I breathed a sigh of relief.

10:30pm — closing time.

Suddenly remembering the warm fabric draped over my shoulders, I was quick to shrug it off, smiling awkwardly as I handed it to him, my cheeks a light shade of pink. “Want your coffee now?” I asked him, turning behind us and flipping the opened sign around, signaling to those that we were now closed.

He shoved his hands in his pockets. “Yeah, sure. It’s going to be a long night so I could use the caffeine.”

I hummed in response, moving around him and making my way behind the counter, grabbing a coffee cup. “Trying to pull an all-nighter?” I asked, my brows raising as I poured him his cup of coffee. The air felt stuffy, my head foggy.

The medication was starting to wear off, and my mind, soul, and body craved the warmth the meds would bring.

I blinked harshly, trying to stay grounded.

From behind me, I heard him breathe a tired sigh. “Pretty much, yeah. I have some files I need to go over before tomorrow morning.”

Passing him his coffee, I gave him a questioning look.

He noticed this, and we quickly explained. “I’m a surgeon and I have a client tomorrow who pretty much bought a new face.”

“Hmm… sounds about right.” This city was full of many who had opted for plastic surgery, so it didn’t exactly come as a shock. When he began to tug out his wallet, I shook my head. “You’re covered tonight.”

He smiled in appreciation, bringing the coffee to his lips, a hm escaping him. Licking his lips, he nodded. “I swear, you have the best coffee in town, (Y/N).”

My face heated, and I wiped my palms on my stained jeans. “Well, technically, Mallory has the best coffee in town,” I corrected him, and he rolled his eyes. “Y’know, since she’s the store manager and she’s the one who supplies.”

“Yeah, but I like when you make me my coffee.”

I scoffed, bending down into a cabinet and grabbing a trash bag, moving to replace the one I had just taken out.

Though I wasn’t facing him, I could feel his gaze burning a hole into my head, his eyes watching me carefully. I ignored the feeling, bringing a hand up to wipe my forehead as I resumed sweeping the floor.

“Well,” he finally began, taking a step backwards towards the door. “I should probably….” He pointed back towards the door, and I fought a smile at his awkwardness.

“Yeah,” I said, an amused smile tugging at my lips.

“Yeah,” he breathed, his voice low. It sounded somewhat disappointed, and he ran a hand through his messy hair. “Well, good night, (Y/N).”

“Goodnight…..?” My cheeks flushed as he quirked an eyebrow.

“Wow, you totally don’t remember my name.” He placed a hand over his heart, his face contorting into a feigned look of hurt.

I grimaced. “Not, no, I do remember it…Alex?”

He cringed, his lips pursed as he shook his head.

“Uh, Ben?”

“Wrong, again.”

“Okay, okay wait.”

He paused, his hand resting on the door handle behind him.

“Stephen.”

He groaned, his hand rubbing his face dramatically.

I paused for a moment, my eyes scanning him.

“Steve,” I finally decided, and he started clapping.

“The one, the only,” he grinned, taking another sip of his coffee.

Finally, I nodded, biting the inside of my cheek.

He really did have such a plain name.

He stared at me for a minute in silence, and I continued my sweeping, picking up the trash in the lobby.

“Can I drive you home tonight?” He asked, his voice soft. He seemed slightly embarrassed, and he reached to scratch the back of his head, a sheepish grin adorning his face.

Looking up, I glanced at him, and he could immediately tell I was slightly put off.

“I mean, I noticed there were no cars outside, and I remembered when you were running through the streets, so I just realized you didn’t have a car,” he rambled. “It’s freezing outside and I just want to be sure you make it home safe, Y’know?”

“Please don’t think I’m a creep,” he finished, his voice pleading.

I was silent for a moment, trying to get a grasp on a decision.

I could say no, tell him I wasn’t at all interested and continue living the life I had been living for the last couple of months. I could continue to grasp at the memory of my best friend. My best friend, who no matter how much I yearned to come back, would most likely never return home to me.

Or, I could say yes. Perhaps this one drive home blossoms into another ride home, into Steve coming in to visit me. Maybe, it even turns into dating. He was a good looking man who seemed genuinely interested in me. Maybe, I could heal from my past and finally find happiness again.

I could truly start living my life again.

Goosebumps rose on my skin as I decided.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

[kissesfromnovalie]

⋆⋆⋆

@readychilledwine

For the High Lady

Rhysand's generosity knew no bounds, not even when it came to sharing his mate with his brothers.

His, Yours, Mine

Finding out you were pregnant should have been the best news. It's too bad you don't know which of your three mates is possibly the father, though.

Mister Grumpy Pantseses

All you wanted was a day in the vegetable garden with your husbands. Your husbands just wanted to spend the day at each other's throats.

⋆⋆⋆

⟡

the high lord keeps interrupting azriel and his mate, until she finally has enough

@angelsandstxrs

Three Wishes

@tsunami-of-tears

Our girl

Deeming you unfit for a mission, the Inner Circle have betrayed your trust and shattered your life’s mission to avenge you sister. And the two males you love most were at the centre of it all.

@illyrian-dreamer

Just One Night

@danikamariewrites

⋆⋆⋆

@throneofsapphics

the moth and the flame

after meeting Nesta in a bookshop, you find the darkest parts of yourselves bonding with each other.

infinitesimal

upset at your partners forgetting an important date, you run to one of your old haunts.

against the contract

If they were genuinely bad people, it would be so much easier to kill them. Signing a special contract to work with Azriel, Feyre, and Rhysand turns out nowhere near expected. You were a bit of fun that became their solace and escape, they were supposed to be an easy assignment that turned into your living nightmare.

⋆⋆⋆

⋆⋆⋆

@potatoplace

Mastermind

Your friend of a few months, Feyre, invited you out for a celebratory drink over your new job, and of course her husband Rhys joins you. The night doesn't go quite as planned, and you end up back at their place with very few wits about you.

You Can Have It

You've been a baker for 75 years, and are finally moving on from the Winter Court to the City of Velaris to start your own bakery after your grandmother passes. After your grand opening, the High Lord and Lady of Night become daily visitors to your bakery for months, every day having your most popular pastry- one that increases fertility for a short time. All the while, the two alphas want nothing more than to call themselves yours.

⋆⋆⋆

omega ours

@mrs-elsie-barnes

the daughter of day

@thatacotargirl

⋆⋆⋆

@littlest-w01f

rita’s

Feyre is drunk, and the barmaid who opened her and her husband's tab that night looks sexier with every shot. Rhysand is more than willing to aid her drunken fantasy

Devine

Rhysand is getting older, and he, along with his general and spymaster, needs to claim an Omega before his Alpha instincts take control of him completely and he is rendered unfit to be a High Lord, lucky or unluckily for him, Kier has an idea.

Sensitive

Rhysand shows you he and his closest friends aren't put off by blood

⋆⋆⋆

⋆⋆⋆

@azsazz

If You Should Die Before You Wake

The High Lord takes you home, but you don’t expect his friends to join.

Double Duty

They don't know if they both can fit.

What's Mine

Hear me out: alphas are super possessive anyway, but imagine high lord/future high lord - way more protective right? Especially in a scenario where there’s other ‘big bad alphas’ around e.g. other high lords at a ball, or at the court of nightmares

⋆⋆⋆

all over my skin

You find yourself in an empty room between the High Lord and the Shadowsinger

@azrielbrainrot

ink stained hand (will you hold it?)

A bookseller’s simple life turns upside down when she becomes fast companions of the Night Court’s Inner Circle. When she develops feelings for the most powerful couple in Prythian, how will she get over the golden thread of fate that pulls them ever so far apart?

@paperibbon

Light in the Darkness

It wasn't just Rhys who had been caught in Amrantha's damnatation. For nearly 50 years, you'd suffered with him, in her bed. After years of enduring agony, it becomes almost impossible to resist seeking refuge in the platonic refuge of your High Lord and High Lady. However, after one night of drunken indulgence, you're left wondering if everything you've built to protect yourself is now shattered.

@myfictionaldreams

[honestlyspookytyphoon]

Cake, Coffee And ... Charles

Synopsis: Unexpectedly, you meet a group of celebrity friends in a small café in France. What happens when you ask them to watch your stuff while you make a phone call?

Word count: +/- 2.5k words of me daydreaming about one of my (many) crushes 🥺 

Warnings: none, I think? I originally intended it to be angst, but I decided to go all-in and add a fluff ending instead. Not really proof-read so probably some language mistakes, my apologies! 

A/N: Translation (French/English or vice versa) is provided if necessary.  I am now going for Charles as the male protagonist (just to put a name), but you can imagine anyone you like! Feedback is highly appreciated! 🤗

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

When you and two colleagues first got the idea to go to a 3-day scientific conference in Nîmes, a historical city in the South-East of France, it had seemed wonderful. 

Nice weather and great food. A beautiful scenery and French gentlemen.  La douce France at its finest.

Yesterday, the three of you arrived at the hotel well on time. Your room was tidy, the bed was comfortable and it was only a 10 min walk from where you stayed to the city centre. After you washed off the tiredness of a 5-hours TGV-trip, you went out. Strolling through the many narrow and colourful streets and seeing the Arena and other ancient Roman buildings, you fell in love with the city immediately. The next two days are going to be amazing, you thought to yourself. 

Today, however, had been nothing but a nightmare.

On you way to the venue, the weather had decided to become an absolute brat. The pouring rain got you drenched, the humidity made you sweat like a horse.  You felt dirty.

The presentations had been way too high-level and sucked all the energy from your brain. You really tried to understand the maths that were involved.  But you failed miserably.

The deliciously looking chocolate cupcakes had been devoured before you even got to the snack tray.  You were hungry.

The final straw was the fact that both your colleagues announced that they would leave earlier then expected, meaning that they could not attend your presentation tomorrow. 

Long story short, your mood was going down. Fast.

It was now 5.30 pm. The day had ended and everybody was expected to meet outside the conference venue at 7.30 pm to go for dinner. Instead of joining the others in pre-drinking, you decided to go back to your hotel room to shower and change and rest for a bit.

On your way to the hotel, you passed by a small, cosy café, which, you realised, did not catch your eye before. The front of the little house was painted pastel blue and the tables under the porch were covered with cute checkered table cloths. The porch itself was decorated with fairy lights and the most beautiful  flowers you had ever seen. Seeing the café lifted your mood instantly. I have to visit this gem tomorrow, you said to yourself.

The final day of the conference went by in a haze. Your presentation was scheduled just before lunch and you had been nervous the entire morning. However, once you stood there, microphone in hand, things went very well. You managed to respect the 20 minutes timeframe without missing the essentials and you had several interesting discussions afterwards. 

There were no presentations scheduled in the afternoon and many participants were packing or had already left. You had opted to leave tomorrow, such that you could still buy some souvenirs for your parents - a tradition you started years ago. You had managed to score some beautiful decorations for your mum and a cute can of traditional sweets for your dad. Being pleased with the gifts, you decided to visit that café you saw earlier and treat yourself to a delicious local pastry.

It was 4.30 pm and, apart from a small group of friends, the café was empty. You greeted the bartender and took a seat next to the window. While admiring the interior of the café, your eyes landed on said group of friends. One of the guys was looking your way. Your eyes met and you flashed him a smile. He smirked and whispered something to his friends.

“Bonjour, Mademoiselle. Veuillez-vous quelque chose à boire ou manger?”, the bartender asked.  Hello miss, would you like a drink or something to eat?

French was not your first language, and although you were quite good at it in school, it was a long time since you last spoke it. Nonetheless, you always tried to speak the local language when you were abroad, so you collected yourself and tried to answer. Keep it simple.

“Oui, j’aimerais un thé vert et quelque chose petite à manger. Avez-vous des patisseries locaux, peut-être?” Yes, I would like a green tea and something small to eat. Do you happen to have any local specialties on the menu?

“Bien sur!  Aujourd’hui, nous offrons La reine de Seba. C’est un petit cake chocolat avec poudre des amandes. C’est comme un brownie.” Of course! Today, we offer La reine de Seba. It is a small chocolate-almond cake. It is very similar to a brownie.

“C’est parfait. Merci beaucoup” That sounds perfect, thank you very much.

While waiting for your order to arrive, you decided to quickly check your phone. To your surprise, you had four missed calls from your supervisor. You must have been in town when she called. Sensing an urgency, you decided to ring her back. You noticed the low signal symbol, so you knew you had to go outside to call her.

Instead of packing all your things and leaving the bartender confused, you decided to leave your belonging in the café and ask someone to watch them while you were out. Since the bartender was out of sight, you had to ask one of the friends. A bit hesitant, you got up and approached their table.

“Euh, mes excuses de vous déranger, mais je dois téléphoner et je n’ai aucun signal ici. Est-ce que vous voulez gardez un oeil sur mes choses pour quelques minutes, s’il-vous-plaît?” Sorry to bother you, but I have to make a call and I do not have any signal here. Do you mind watching my things for a minute?

“Ah, bien oui. Pas de problème, ma belle”, the guy you greeted earlier responded. Of course. No problem, dear.

Thanking them, you made your way outside. The guy, whom you would later meet as Pierre, turned to his friends.

“Je n’ai pas menti, tu vois. Elle est polie et très mignonne. Et avez-vous vu qu’elle porte un badge de l’ université? Elle est intelligente aussi! Une 10/10, à mon avis.”  

I did not lie, did I? She is kind and very cute. Also, did you see that she has a badge from the university? This means she is smart as well! A 10/10 if you ask me.

The others threw in arguments and started to discuss how amazing their significant others were. Charles stayed silent. 

He did not have a girlfriend. Being a professional racing driver meant that he was always in the public eye, always busy training or travelling around the world. Although he hates to admit it, it was not an ordinary job. He was not an ordinary guy. He was a well-known face in France, which lead to girls throwing themselves at his feet but also made it hard to find someone who looked past the racing driver name-and-fame. And if he did, the girl was screwed over by the media or fans or the distance got the best of their relationship, leading to Charles breaking things off. He did not really mind being single, since he was always surrounded by friends, family or his team, but he would lie if he said that he did not miss someone to love love.

He was still looking into the direction of the exit/entrance, hoping you would be back soon. “Ca serrais dommage si nous ne la verrons jamais, n’est ce pas Charles?”, Pierre teased. It would be a shame if we never saw her again, would it not, Charles?

Charles started blushing. “Euh”, he stuttered, “je ne sais pas. Elle est jolie, oui, mais nous ne la connaissons pas. Et, en plus, elle ne nous connait pas. Elle ne s’intéresse pas au monde de F1”. I do not know. She is pretty, yes, but we do not really know her. She did not even recognize any of us. She is not interested in the world of F1.

“Tu es incroyable. Qu’est-ce-que tu veux? Qu’elle commence à crier au regard de nous? Nous tous savons que relations avec fans ne marchent pas.”, Pierre sighs. You are unbelievable. What do you want? That she starts crying when she sees us? We all know that relationships with fans do not work.

Charles had to agree. All of them had one or more relationships with fans before and they all ended badly. Maybe it was not a bad idea to look for someone who was a complete outsider. Pierre knew his best friend. He knew that Charles was having a debate with himself, on whether to talk to this girl or not and risking to fall in love. Pierre had been in situations like this before. He had never been short on female attention, but it was only at the start of his current relationship that he has felt some nervousness talking to a girl. Charles had encouraged him to talk to his now fiancée and this was the perfect opportunity to pay him back.

“Elle va rentrer. Confies-moi, mon frère.”, Pierre winked. She is coming back. Trust me, my brother.

Charles groaned. Pierre was up to something and he did not know to be happy or scared. Or both.

You re-entered the café in a fuzzy state. Your supervisor has called to ask how your presentation went. Instead of being happy that all went well and some interactions were sparked, she decided to start questioning your delivery and answers to the questions. You did want not your high to become a low, so you suggested to discuss all when you were back. Damn, you hoped the cake did not take long to be served. You needed chocolate.

Heading back to your table, you saw the bartender signaling that your order was ready. Thanking him, you took your plate and went back to your table. However, you did not miss the guy from earlier looking at you again, and you realised you have not thanked them yet. 

“Merci encore pour garder un oeil, c’était très sympa de vous.” Thank you again for watching my things. It was very kind of you.

“De rien. Je m’appelle Pierre”.  He offers you his hand. “Quel est ton nom, ma belle?” You are welcome. My name is Pierre . What is your name, dear?

“Je m’appelle Y/N. Enchantée, Pierre.” I am Y/N. Nice to meet you Pierre.

“Es-tu ici toute seule? Parce que tu peux s’assoir ici si tu veux.” Are you all alone? Because you can come sit here with us if you want. 

“C’est très gentil de vous, mais je ne veux pas déranger. Je vous connais, je sais qui vous êtes. Je veux respecter vos reposes et privacy. En plus, je ne suis pas française, donc je ne vais comprendre rien de vos questions ou réponds”, you answered shyly. That is very kind of you, but I do not want to impose. I know who you are. I want to respect your time-off and privacy. Also, I am not French so I would not understand a thing of what you are saying or asking.

You knew who they were. Ever since the 2021 championship, F1 has revived in your country and it was hard to escape. To be honest, you were not that into F1 - you were more into MXGP and MotoGP - but you knew the in and outs of the sport. 

“You are not disturbing if we ask you, right? And do not worry about not understanding”, Pierre stated, “we will switch to English for a pretty girl like you.”

The blush that rose to your cheeks was the only confirmation Pierre needed. Shooting a quick wink to Charles, he got up to take your plate and placed it at the empty spot next to him and across Charles. 

I hate you, Charles thought.

Charles’ brain stopped working the moment you were in front of him. Your hair was put together in a messy bun, with some loose strands falling out. Your jeans and red top hugged your silhouette in all the right places. You held and started conversations so effortlessly. How you got along with Pierre and laughed at his stupid jokes. Damn, he was a lost cause already. 

“Right, Charles?”, Pierre asked. 

Charles’ face went blank. He was zoned out and did not know what to say. Pierre saw the confused expression on his friend’s face and smirked. I knew he would fall for her. Why am I so good at this? He should thank me, buy me a house in Guadeloupe or something.

“You have visited Slovenia already, have you not?” 

Charles was quick to recover. “Yes, I have indeed. Do you want to go?”, he asked, looking in between you and Pierre, not knowing who to answer.

“Hahah, not right now though, that would be a bit weird”, you laughed, “but I do want to go one day. What did you think of Slovenia? Is it worth the visit?”

Your attention was full on Charles now and he was not letting this opportunity pass. 

A couple of teas, cakes and many laughs later, it was 7pm. “Oh, look at the time”, you said surprised, “I really should be going. I still have to pack and check my travel plans for tomorrow.” You started to collect your jacket and purse. “I had a great time talking to you”, you said while looking fondly at Charles, something Pierre did not miss. “Thank you for inviting me”.

“The pleasure was all mine”, Charles said, beaming after what seemed like a 2-hours tête-à-tête with you. “Ours”, Pierre corrected, “the pleasure was all ours”.

“You guys are too kind. Bye Pierre, bye Charles, bye Jean and Théo”. 

You got up and made your way to the door. It took a glare and a kick to the shin from Pierre for Charles to realise that you were really leaving and that he needed to take action if he wanted to see you again. So, before you could open the door and walk out of his life forever, he put a hand on your shoulder. 

“Hey Y/N”

“Hey Charles”, you smiled. 

“Listen, I really enjoyed talking to you. It feels like you know me, even though we just met, and it feels great to be able to talk about other things than racing. So, I was wondering if I could maybe get your number?” 

The shock on your face was visible. I blew it, Charles thought, she thinks I am a creep.

“ I mean, only if you want of course and I will not stalk you, I promise.”

You knew he would not. He was gorgeous and genuine and you would be a fool if you let this guy go. Taking a business card from your purse, you scrapped your work number and wrote your personal number on it instead.

“Here. You can call or text me anytime you want. I will try to answer as soon as I can. Most people only get my work number, you know, so do not lose it.”, you said, shooting Charles a wink and million-dollar smile before walking out of the café.

“I will not, I promise. I will not lose you, Y/N. Never”, Charles said to himself, looking at your number as if he just won the lottery.

[animatorweirdo]

When the dragons fly

You visit a city and see something interesting. Aelon is haunted by the strange music that seems to tempt him to go to the forest. 

Chapter 6

Warnings:  Mentions of scars. Helena is a weird friend. Nightmares, hypnotic music, lying. 

----------------------------

You jumped off the wagon, carefully landing on your feet and helping Helena get the boxes down. The city was filled with noises of people, horses, and caravans crossing the streets.  The cold wind from the mountains brushed against your face as you carried one of the boxes with the help of Helena. Helena opens the door to the shop and allows you to walk in first before following behind. 

 A little bell rang above the door as you walked in with Helena. “Finally! I have been waiting for a new batch to fill my shelves,” The shop owner greeted you with a heartful grin. You and Helena laid the boxes down as he came over and checked the jars and pastries inside. 

“Wonderful. I can’t thank you enough, ladies,” he said with a smile before noticing your arm. “Goodness! What happened to you?” he pointed out. “I… had a little incident back at home. It’s nothing to worry about,” you said. “Bullcrap! A little incident? You killed a warg with your bare hands and brushed it off as a little incident like your arm didn’t almost get ripped off?” Helena interfered, wrapping her arm around your shoulder. “If you ever need someone to guard your shop. I suggest you hire this woman because her arm strength is just out of this world,” she patted your shoulder with a grin, making you smile awkwardly. 

“It’s nothing, seriously,” you said. “Well–I’m glad to see you alive. I can’t have you dead because who will provide me with the goods then?” The shop owner laughed. “You can bring the rest in. I will start unpacking, and then I will give you the payment,” he starts picking up the boxes as you and Helena walk out of the shop. 

“You know, you would make nice money if you become a huntress or a ranger,” Helena stated as you stepped outside. “Perhaps, but I’m happy making jams and treats than getting myself into action again. I want to leave those days behind,” you said. “I mean— look where it brought my arm into,” you motioned at your resting arm. Helena smiled.

“And here I thought Ennard was the reason–- you refused to work as a hunter or became part of the watchmen,” she said. “Well, he believes I’m lying about my past, so I guess that’s the reason too, “ you said, making her snicker. 

You both then hear horse neighs and see a group of elves riding by. One of the elves leading on the front was blond and talked with a dark-haired one in a loud voice. The dark-haired elf looked rather annoyed. They were followed by another elf with a rather grim expression on his face, and he was then followed by a very tall elf wearing a cloak. You couldn't see the tall elf’s face, but you could see the red locks that fell from his shoulders and the faint scars on his skin. 

"Oh, look at the tall one," Helena said as you both continued observing the elves. 

You continued to look out of curiosity. The tall elf suddenly turned his gaze on you like he sensed you were watching him. You were taken back when his soft blue eyes looked right into yours. He held a calm and collected expression, but you could see he bore some kind of a hidden flame behind his eyes. Your skin nearly shuddered with goosebumps – he was someone not to be messed with.

You stared at each other for a moment before he looked away and followed after his companions. 

"Oh my, he looks like he has seen better days," Helena said. “I mean– did you see those scars?” she asked. “What’s wrong with scars? It just means he has seen some battles and survived,” you questioned as you continued looking after the elf. Helena hummed before you two then started walking toward the wagon. 

"Which group do you think they belong to?" Helena questioned. "Well, the Sindar prefer to stay in their forest, so my guess is they belong to the Noldor since they're more common around these parts," You said while Helena’s brother picked down more boxes from the wagon. 

"Which one would you pick?" she asked. "What?" you raised a brow at her. "Which one of those elves do you think is the most handsome?" she grinned at you. “Are you seriously asking me which one of those strangers who simply rode past us is the most good-looking one?” you questioned with a disappointed look.  

"Well, it's not every day you see elves walking around, and you're never interested in men, so for the fun of it. Pick one," Helena whined. You relented and thought for a moment. 

"I guess the red-haired one. He seemed calm than the others," you said. 

“Interesting. I thought the blond elf would gain your interest since he has blond hair like Aelon,” Helena expressed as you picked one of the boxes. 

“Nah— the blond elf does remind me of someone, but it's not Aelon,” You said, then looked at her. “Now, come on. Let’s get these boxes out of the way so we can still visit that tavern you like so much,” you said, making her grin and pick one of the boxes. You then focused on carrying the boxes inside the shop and getting paid for the year. 

Back in the village, Aelon was holding on to the wooden stick, practicing his hold and the balance of his feet. He controlled his breathing, slowly moving the practice sword in his hand, memorizing every movement you had taught him. 

Eweniel approached him as he was training behind your home. “Hey, Aelon. Are you practicing your sword skills?” She asked. “Yep. I wanna get better, so I will practice everything I know until (Name) comes back,” He explained while not breaking focus from his movements. Eweniel stood quiet for a moment as she watched Aelon train. 

“Do you feel guilty about what happened in the forest with the giant wolf?” Eweniel asked. Aelon thought about his answer as the question lingered in his mind, and he was reminded of that moment when you wrestled with the warg and got injured. 

“Yes…” he muttered under his breath. “If we had just stayed at the village and didn’t break the rules. (Name)’s arm would be fine,” he explained. “I’m sorry, Aelon,” Eweniel looked down in guilt. “Don’t be…it wasn’t your fault,” he looked back at her. “But I pressured you to come along, especially when you were right about meeting a wild animal,” she said. “We couldn’t have known, Ewe,” Aelon said. “It was just a gut feeling, and (Name) doesn’t hold it against you or anyone in our group,” he smiled at her. “Even though her arm got hurt? How is she not mad about it?” she asked. “Well, she always said she had seen worse. I guess nothing just bothers her,” Aelon said with a smile. 

“So, that’s why I want to get better, so I can defend myself and be fearless like her,” Aelon continued with the practice sword in his hand. 

“Thats nice! By the way, Aelon, aren’t you supposed to be at Dwenn’s workshop?” Eweniel questioned. Aelon widened his eyes. “Oh no! I didn’t know it was already time to go back to him,” he dropped his wooden stick and began to run. “See you later, Ewe!” he yelled while running toward the village. 

He quickly ran through the village and arrived at the workshop, where Dwenn was waiting on the porch. “There you are– I thought I would have to come to check if the bedbugs had eaten you,” Dwenn chuckled as he smoked his pipe. “I’m sorry, I was practicing and didn’t know the time,” Aelon explained, catching his breath. 

“That’s alright because today we’re gonna practice chopping some wood. So, pick up the hatched over there and follow me. (Name) insisted I help you grow some muscles,” Dwenn laughed, pointing at the tool on the corner, and walked off his porch. Aelon only rolled his eyes at the statement as he went to pick up the hatchet and followed Dwenn to the place where the village kept the chopped wood. 

The two arrived at the place, and Aelon picked up a strong smell of wood and planks, strong enough to make his nose squint. 

“Alright, let me show you how to use the hatched and a proper technique to chop wood,” Dwenn grabbed the hatched from his hands and picked up a thick wood block. “You do this, find a proper spot, then you strike it!” he gently poked the wood block with the hatchet before striking it with enough force to split it in half. Aelon was surprised as he did not expect the older man to possess such strength. “Wow,” He said. 

“Now, you do it, but since you’re small. You shall chop those smaller blocks into pieces. They will be used to heat the fireplaces. I’m going to collect some planks for our latest order,” Dwenn handed him the hatchet. “Call me if you need anything,” he walked away.

Aelon started cutting the wood blocks, struggling to get them in half in one strike. He proceeded to hit the wooden block against the tree stump before finally breaking it in half. He then started cutting the pieces into smaller ones.  

The rough activity and the heat from the sun made him sweat, and his arm began to ache. He could only wonder how you managed to work like this. 

He groaned after breaking one of the wood blocks in half. He brushed his hair out of his face and took a moment to rest his lungs. 

Something echoed in his ears. Aelon stopped and listened. His face paled when he recognized the noise. It was the flute again. 

The familiar song began to play in his mind, deafening all the other sounds around him. 

Aelon felt anxious as the memory of the forest and the dark figure came back to him. He looked toward the forest that was outside the wood-cutting place. It looked dark, yet something began to pull him toward it. 

He walked toward the forest, holding on to the hatchet while the flute's song echoed like it was calling him to the forest. 

Aelon stopped at the edge, listening to the song that lured him to get closer. It filled his mind with a desire to go there, but he struggled since he promised you not to go there again. However, the song became louder, and it felt like it was clouding his mind to go there. 

Soon, Aelon could not think of anything else but to go there. He wanted, no, needed to follow the music. He was ready to take another step till a hand suddenly grabbed him from behind. 

"What are you doing, boy? I have been calling your name for ages!" Dwenn spoke as the flute's song fell quiet once again. 

Aelon stared at him, then at the forest, hearing nothing but silence in his mind. 

Confusion filled his very being. What happened?

"Sorry, Dwenn," The little boy lowered his head. "Is something wrong, my boy?" Dwenn's gaze softened. "My voice fell completely deaf to your ears," he stated. Aelon felt his heartbeat rise because he did not hear Dwenn call out to him.

"It's probably nothing," Aelon said, hesitant to tell about the song. 

"That did not look like nothing to me. Are you feeling unwell? You're sweating more than you should," Dwenn laid the back of his hand against Aelon's forehead. "Come. We should put you to rest. I can't put you to work if you're ill," He gently pushed Aelon toward the village. Aelon did not resist and followed the older man. 

He glanced back at the forest, hearing the flute's song still echoing in his ears. He felt shivers run down his spine as he couldn't shake off the feeling of dread from his mind. Something was going on and it was nothing good.

Taglist: @natchayaphorn​​​ @kimnamnu​​ @thatrandomidiot182​​

[the-everqueen]

“Rose and the Corinthian are both people who need care, in different but complimentary ways, and i think that's part of what fascinates me about pairing them.”

I would say this ask is more of a “Thoughts on Corirose” one, based on your excellent quote/response here from LA Guard Dog part 1 👀

i do not remember saying this, which is funny to me because looking back at my comment replies on that fic, i was clearly burned out from final year of grad school. i'm way more loquacious now that my brain isn't running on fumes and spite. but i DO remember how much i appreciated each comment; those ao3 notifications in my inbox were little sparks of delight amid rejection emails and, later, a wave of onboarding paperwork.

anyways i stand by past me's words. i feel like fandom downplays how much Rose has lost: she's a young adult from a broken home, her mom died and left her with limited material resources to start her own life, she met Unity and then almost immediately lost her, she got her brother back but only after he's been through hell, and now she's his only living guardian. she's never really had a childhood. so it makes sense, to me, that deep down she'd really want to be cared for. she had to be The Responsible One with Lyta, with Jed, with the Endless. when is someone going to watch out for her? and yeah, the implication at the end of s1 is that she has this whole found family who are invested in her, but caring about someone is different from caring for them. also accepting care from people you feel have already given you a lot can be difficult when you're used to being self-sufficient and circumstances have taught you that the only person you can really trust to stick around is yourself. i skip ahead to post-comix in LA guard dog, but even with some distance from the events of the Doll's House arc, she's still a mid-20s woman in a parental role for a traumatized preteen. that's a lot for someone who isn't also a daughter of the Endless and the only remaining adult of her human bloodline.

enter the Corinthian. he's useful for Rose in a few ways: he can't die, he can shoulder some of the responsibilities involved with raising a kid (at very least the stuff that takes minimal skill but maximum brain space, like school schedules and chores and packing lunch). also he's an utter hedonist, which is great for getting Rose acclimated to the idea of having things she likes rather than just what she needs. look, he wanted a fancy coffee so he got her this fancy floral pastry. extrapolating from the comix (including the dreaming run, but i'm cherry picking there), he's very much a person who shows feeling through action, even when that's at direct contradiction with his words. and that's great for Rose, who i imagine has had a lot of people say nice things to her and then utterly fail to show up for her in the ways that matter.

i'm talking about him like he's a tool, which admittedly is how Dream still conceptualizes him to some degree in this au. but he's aware this time around that's not what the Corinthian needs, hence giving him to Rose. i don't know that Rose can think of the Corinthian as an object, based on her experiences and who she is as a person. Rose imagines possibilities that Morpheus could not. so her idea of care for a Nightmare looks different, too, and the crux of the LA guard fic pt. 2 is the question "is that enough?" idk! but i think it matters to the Corinthian. there's a moment in the dreaming comix, during Coco's Year As A Real Boy, where he muses that his bf Sila has become more than a distraction to him--i think someone seeing the Corinthian as a person, beyond his function as a mirror (aka what he can do for/to them), is the realization of a story he's been telling himself for a long time. about him and the Dreaming, about him and Dream.

tl;dr: Coco and Rose are both people who have been positioned as non-subjects in their respective worlds and that means they're both weirdly able to affirm each other's subjectivity.