#happy new year of yearning everyone <3

[melit0n]

It came to me in a dream

[jiminrings]

fail-safe (2)

pairing: yoongi x reader

wordcount: 8k

glimpse: yoongi got everything he ever wanted and you've heard nothing about it, so you're thankful.

alternatively, yoongi reminds you of home in more ways than one.

[ part one, intermission, part two, intermission 02, finale ]

[ a Lot of angst, brother's best friend AND single dad au, eventual fluff, a lot of yearning but For What, they reunite but at what cost rlly, jealousy, self-loathing, unrequited love (initial), deja vu but in the worst possible form, eventual redemption in the next parts ]

notes: i am So sorry for this .

as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!! even reading ur thoughts in the tags give me life :) | series masterlist

FIVE YEARS LATER

The trip back home wasn’t as rough as Yoongi expected it to be.

Somehow, there’s a huge difference between sitting in economy seats versus first-class seats, even if they’re situated on the same aircraft. When he left, Yoongi was irritable (amongst other things) to keep bumping elbows with everyone else; now that he’s back, he almost misses the ruckus in the cabin that’s far too cramped for everyone who could afford it.

Yoongi used to hate people like himself — atleast the version that he is now. He hated bastards sitting upfront in seats that reclined all the way back and ate off plates instead of noisy, flimsy plastic containers. Back then, deep down to his very core, he wanted that lifestyle for himself. To become bigger and better than he could ever imagine for the life ahead of him was always the goal.

Now that he’s at the peak, maybe even being the peak himself, he feels weirdly homesick.

“You need to bundle up all the way, Haneul. They’re gonna scold me if you’re not covered from head to toe,” Yoongi playfully chides his son, the insecurity and nervousness underneath his tone flying right over his head. It’s not even that cold, but still, a huge part of Yoongi worries.

He worries everyday if he’s a good dad to his four-year old. He worries if he’s good enough to be a solo parent because after all, he’s the one who has main custody of Haneul anyway. He worries and worries, but there’s nothing quite like the trepidation he feels being back home with everyone who has ever known him prior to all this success, suddenly seeing him come home.

It should be the opposite way around, that’s what everyone says to him. Yoongi had been queasy the whole flight back home despite the flight being one of the smoothest trips he’s ever been on in his life. He’s nervous to be back where he had been born and raised and he doesn’t know what’s that supposed to mean, except for the fact that he has an inkling of what the weight in his chest pertains to.

He’s back because it’s your mother’s 60th birthday. He’s back because her and Namjoon had asked him to, and he obliged without even thinking about it. Yoongi had offered numerous times to throw a party for the woman who had practically raised him alongside his closest friend, and even if Namjoon had backed him up on the grand idea for such a large milestone, she said no. All she wanted was for everyone to be back home, and Yoongi couldn’t say no.

Neither could you.

Yoongi is not the most modest person alive, but he is at his humblest when he drives the long way home just to delay the inevitable. He’s happy to the point he could be sick. He can’t tell if it’s the joy or the anxiety in his chest that makes it tighten, almost unbearably so, that he makes Haneul reach up to his forehead to check if he has a fever.

Yoongi’s home.

Not Los Angeles home, and not New York home. Not his home with a closet that’s the size of his childhood house’s living room, and not his space with the big windows and concierge downstairs.

Yoongi’s home — where the streets are narrow and the stairs are creaky; where this time, it’s all of him and none of you.

.

.

.

Enduring is different than working.

You’ve realized that the two concepts are drastically different as soon as Yoongi left, leaving you to survive the remaining years of your degree before you had to face the reality that you had to work to the bone for the rest of your life if you wanted a shot at living an average, food-stocked-in-the-fridge kind of life.

You didn’t know anyone who was connected to someone of importance one way or another, your family had zero ties, and you graduated from a university that raised more eyebrows in confusion than it tilted heads in awe. Your degree does havehigh promises as far as everyone in your town was concerned — it does and it should be, if only you were born and raised in different circumstances.

There’s not one acclaimed and high-profit company that would ever accept the likes of you. You worked hard and even if there were no exchange student agreements and Latin honors to show for it, you really did. You gave your best to graduate with a degree you never really liked and was only forced upon you, all for the promise of a future. It didn’t matter if it was extremely good or bad — everyone else just said you had to have one.

Your misfortune is what it is. It’s empty and haunting and the two weeks you had spent in the city right after graduating is truly something you never want to relive.

In hindsight, gambling the rest of your pocket money on a bus fare in your last day of job-hunting in the city at the time was a stupid decision. It was impulsive and irresponsible and everything your family scolded you for, what Yoongi hated you for, but it ended up being the single best gamble you’ve ever made, even above entry-level lottery tickets.

The same circumstances that held you back from where you’re supposed to head ended up propelling you to somewhere far, far different. Your degree became completely irrelevant, and the fact that you had nobody of significance in the city– no person to pass malice and gossip onto— made you a manager.

It had been a gamble to go work for an unknown entertainment company, much more a sinking one. It was an insult to have busted your ass back in your hometown, studying and working at the same time, only to work professionally in the city for a field that you didn’t even study about.

Your fate is what it is. You’ve endured and worked hard enough to the point that you had finally lucked out. Being the manager of someone who had later turned out to become the biggest actor in the industry, even in Hollywood, became your biggest break up to date.

Your way back home feels like an embrace you’ve denied yourself for far too long. You’ve mainly stayed in Seoul apart from the several hundred times you had to come with Jungkook for filming outside of the country, yet you could only count on one hand the amount of times you came home without anyone telling you to.

Coming home had become foreign to you as much as leaving it had become familiar.

“I’m near, Joon,” you hum to your phone, taking a quick glance at the cake you’ve strapped to your front seat. “It’s only us, right?”

“Yeah. Just us.”

Maybe it’s your fault for changing what us meant throughout the past five years, but Namjoon’s definition never changed. Maybe it’s your fault for not clarifying what he meant when you’re still kilometers away, when you can still leave, but nonetheless, you were cornered.

Us meant what it used to be when you were a kid in your childhood home — when Yoongi was still in the picture and you didn’t hate him for it.

In the grand scheme of things, you realize that Yoongi was right — nothing valuable was left for him in your hometown anymore. He was as right as you were wrong every time he went on a monologue of how he thinks there’s no problem in him admitting that he’s full of envy. He had been right for being bitter that there’s people who have and get much more than him, more than what they deserve, by not even putting a fourth of the effort that he does.

In the same way that he was right, you were wrong for thinking each time that Yoongi would soon outgrow his ambitions and instead, see things for what they are. You were wrong for thinking Yoongi would stoop down to your page, much less ever think of it.

Yoongi was right for saying that his stomach’s made of steel, and you were wrong for trying to convince him otherwise. He’s always had the appetite for more, the digestion of whatever life throws at him coming easy. Yoongi can choke down the reality of leaving Namjoon, your brother, who’s been buddies with him even before they could talk. He could forgo the only brother figure he’s ever had in his life if it means making something of himself.

He doesn’t get constipated from the reality of no longer having the homemade meals your mother would make that the younger, more innocent, and less ambitious version of him would literally jumps fences for. In fact, Yoongi’s palate craved something more foreign and sophisticated; not familiar, hearty meals served in dinnerware dulled from years of routine.

His stomach doesn’t turn thinking about how the skyline he said he’d never get tired of, wouldn’t appear in his new side of the world. The little, unassuming, and far too comfortable version of him who used to chase sunrises with his bike as a child and chase sunsets with his car as a teenager, doesn’t feel like he’d be poisoned if he were to see the sunlight in a high-rise instead of a run-down pavement.

Yoongi’s right when he said he had a tolerance because he doesn’t even get heartburn when you cry for him to no longer leave. You’re not in the position to beg him to stay (and you probably never will be) because as you’ve come to realize, he would only stay for the big things.

The only thing that would anchor Min Yoongi into place and dissuade him from chasing more is by being the most. One would have to be extremely significant, even bigger than Namjoon’s brotherhood, your mother’s impact, and what your hometown has to offer. You can’t even hold a candle to the aforementioned.

In Yoongi’s grand plan that’s as big as the galaxy, you’re merely a speck of dust that had the luck of hovering around him. You realized it back then when you blew over and fought with him right before his flight; right when Yoongi was clutching his one-way ticket, right when one foot was already out of the door.

“But the future that you want is not easy, Yoongi!” you gritted through your teeth, the grip you had on his suitcase too visceral that it bends under the pressure. Yoongi snatches his luggage from you in a blink, nostrils flaring in annoyance.

“Of course you’d be the first to say that,” he seethed, eyes wild and unforgiving. He drills his finger into his temple, inching towards you with an anger he had never shown before. “You don’t work as hard as I do, Y/N! You always settle. You always go for mediocre. You never put your head into anything because you’re too immature for any of this shit!”

“I’m not immature, you asshole!”

“Yes you are, you dipshit!” Yoongi scoffed, throwing his head back. “You cave and you bend and you let the whole world fuck you over, then you come running to me whining. You don’t have a passion in life, Y/N! You’re begging me to stay in the same predicament that you’re in now, what’s not immature about that?”

“When you leave now and decide to come back one day, Yoongi,” you spat with resentment, the tears that pour down your cheeks no longer out of sadness but instead, out of promise. “Nothing will ever be the same.”

“Good,” Yoongi clipped, turning his back on you for the last time. “Good for me.”

In the grand scheme of things, you realize that when Yoongi left five years ago, he also took the large chunk of your soul that had been shaped over and over again the entire time that he stood by you. He’d gotten his hands on the security and contentment you used to take pride in, weaponizing them against you.

You’re unsure if you have to thank him for that, the uncertainty being on par with the insecurity you had felt when he left you with his truth.

When you visit your mother for her birthday and see Yoongi emerge from your childhood bedroom, hand-in-hand with a toddler that looks like an exact carbon copy of him, you’re unsure of what to do either.

You’re not hysterical in the same way you stood before him when you even considered ripping up his plane ticket, but on the other hand, Yoongi’s inconsolable in the way he flounders before you.

“Y/N,” he says breathless, the lump in his throat even bigger than the tiny fist that grips his hand. “I… I-I didn’t-…” Yoongi tries again, his mouth dry at your appearance. “You came home.”

“I’m only visiting,” you answer, the curt smile on your face that Yoongi recognizes to be the one you’d give to strangers making his blood run cold. “I don’t plan on staying.”

.

.

.

You’re numb if that’s the word for it.

Your chest buzzes emptily the same way your fingers clench around nothing. You look at everywhere and everyone but Yoongi and his son. It’s nauseating to even think that everyone’s eating dinner as if everything’s okay; what’s even more sickening is that somehow, you’re willing to settle for it.

Yoongi is your mom’s cross-stitch project of a teddy bear that she hung up in your room one day when you were in school that you never took off by the time you came home. He’s a dent at the corner of your gate that could’ve only been made by Namjoon when he was practicing his soccer skills. He’s a Snellen chart that nobody really uses, stuck to the side of the refrigerator that you walk past.

Yoongi’s here, there, and everywhere, but you don’t question it. He’s simply there in your orbit and even if he exists, you don’t follow up on him.

You stay quiet at the talks of the sleeping situation because it turns out that Yoongi’s family had long sold their house. You never knew that throughout the several times you came down to visit.

Frankly, you’re relieved to barely know anything about Yoongi these days.

“You and Haneul can take my room,” you half-heartedly offer, not because it’s Yoongi who tugs at your heartstrings and demands your pity, but his child instead. The two, three (?) year-old baby (read: you’re too hesitant to ask what his age is because if it’s anything higher, then that meant Yoongi had moved on earlier than you did) you didn’t even know existed because you’ve completely cut off Yoongi from your life and refused to listen to Namjoon every time he talked about him, will be sleeping in your room; it just happens that he’s with his dad.

Yoongi’s awed at your preposition but he’s even more worried. He can’t tell a single thought that’s going on behind your eyes nor a single hint behind your tone. You’re formal; neutral. You’re detached even when you utter Haneul’s name and gesture them to your bedroom as if he hasn’t spent years and years of his life in your home.

“Where will you sleep?” he furrows his brows, his hand that had been rubbing circles on Haneul’s back faltering.

He’s asking because he doesn’t know anything about you at this point. He can’t tell if it’s the indigestion he has from resisting to talk your ear off at the dining table (like he’s always did when you were young) because you barely even spoke to him, or if it’s the overwhelming feeling of being back home with everything feeling familiar but you — either way, Yoongi thinks he’s gonna be sick.

“I’ll sleep at my mom’s,” you purse your lips, leaving him at that.

Between the yearning, demanding looks you get from Yoongi, the nosy and concerned glances from Namjoon, and even the guilt that you get from keeping all of your emotions from your mom when you used to confide in her religiously when you were younger — you’re drained. The urge to wash off all your anxiety can’t be done in your childhood home’s small bathroom. You can’t with the faulty water heater (you have to keep one finger pressed on the button at all times to keep it running) because you can’t even cry in peace under the either scorching or freezing water.

You can’t evade everything by grabbing a drink from the fridge that runs loudly as if it’s excavating oil from underneath your floors. You can’t curl up on the couch that’s become worn with age because there’s dents of you and Yoongi, the only two people who had sat on it the most every late night for years on end. You can’t romanticize any of the things in your home that have brought you joy all your life at this point in time.

To sleep under the same roof with your mother and brother again after so long feels foreign. It’s a language you can perceive but can’t translate and the frustration that comes with it seeps into your bones. There must be some common ground between the three of you; it should be anything and everything. With Namjoon being a world-renowned football player and you being somewhat accomplished and decorated in your field, you’ve managed to retire your mom early.

The three of you are doing fine. Not one interaction in the past five years has ever felt this tense and unfamiliar, but if you could pick just the odd one out, the very reason why you feel like falling to the floor and crawling your way out of your own home because you feel like you don’t belong to it — it’s Yoongi.

You feel awkward in your own four walls, whereas Yoongi finds your nightlight that you keep tucked in your closet without breaking a sweat.

Namjoon tugs you right when you’re about to call it a day in your mom’s room, his hushed whispers taking you back to when he pleaded for you not to rat them out whenever he and Yoongi crashed at the couch drunk.

“Give them this,” he shoves the can of bug spray into your hands, your immediate reaction making him wrestle with you just to push you closer to your own bedroom.

“No, Joon. You give it.”

“Y/N, no. You give it,” he whines, purposely having given Yoongi extra sheets and blankets earlier without the bug spray so you’d have something to take to him.

“I don’t wanna see Yoongi,” you whisper, trying to pathetically regain your footing even if you know your attempts go futile against an athlete for a brother.

“You think I don’t know that?” he snarks, giving you one last shove with a stern finger. “We’re gonna talk about whatever the hell happened between you and him, but right now, you’re gonna offer him bug spray like the gracious hosts that we are!”

You crash too far to your door that it could be mistaken as a knock, making you hiss because you know you can’t retract it. You actually knock this time, being met with nothing but a quiet Yoongi behind your own door.

Even when he opens it fully, even when it’s your own room — you enter hesitantly.

Yoongi’s already made a home out of your room. He knew where your nightlight was, knew which good extension cord (that didn’t spark every time it shifted) to plug into the wall, and even knew where you kept the magazine that you had to wedge between your windows whenever they didn’t fully close.

“Namjoon told me to give you this,” you put your hand out, looking at everything but Yoongi. You could look at Haneul who’s sprawled in the middle of the bed, but it isn’t any different than looking at his dad himself.

Yoongi, on the other hand, can’t see anything but you. He feels like an intruder who just happened to know the confines of your life almost better than his own, holding bug spray and the remainder of whatever recognition you have left for him.

“Will we ever be alright?” he whispers, not for the sake of keeping Haneul asleep, but for the sake of his sanity. If he makes his voice any louder, he’ll spill all his grievances and question if he had ever meant anything to you.

“We’ve always been alright,” you smile tightly, wrapping your hands around your back.

“You know what I’m talking about,” he pleads, swallowing the lump in his throat. “When did you ever give me bug spray? When did you have to knock on my door, o-or when did you ever have to treat me like I’m some guest and not a huge part of your life?” Yoongi stumbles over his words, correcting himself with a huff. “Most of your life.”

The sarcasm that coats the last of his words makes you twitch, the clench in your jaw being unmistakeable. Yoongi almost forgot what you looked like whenever you argued with him — talked to him, even. “Why are you only bitching about this to me and not to Namjoon? He’s the one who told me to give you the bug spray.”

“This is not about the bug spray!”

“What is it about then? Is this, is this some sort of long-winded euphemism that involves bug spray? What is it Yoongi, are you gonna hound me for an essay about it?” you spit, exhaling heavily. Haneul twitches in his sleep from the corner of your eye. “You grew up and so did I.”

Yoongi flinches like you’ve shot him.

“Don’t do this to me, kid. Don’t do this to us.”

You flinch because anything is better than to have him dig up his old nickname for you as if he’s close; as if he’s still the Yoongi that you chased, as if you’re still the Y/N he looked out for.

“Don’t call me that.”

( ♡ )

Yoongi’s in the kitchen with your mom.

He looks domestic this way, hair tousled and pajamas loose. Even if you have unbridled internet access (courtesy of the high-speed package you split with Namjoon for your mom even if the most she does online is repost motivational quotes, reels of Namjoon and his team, and clips of Jungkook where you’re seen), you can’t muster the courage to search Yoongi’s name and what he’s made of himself.

You’re too scared to search up articles about his success as a producer because if you do, you’re terrified by the thought of accidentally clicking a link that leads you to a page of him and his ex-wife.

You’re too weak to search up the songs he’s had a hand in (that is if you hadn’t heard them before) because you fear that if you even listen for a single second, you might hear how perfect his life has been ever since he left behind everything that he’s ever known.

Even now, you’re too uneasy at the sight of him. He’s in your home and he looks like the version of himself that had never left. The Yoongi in front of you, sitting on your seat at the dining table and peeling tangerines with your mom, resembles the Yoongi that would top off your glass with water whenever you ate with him.

It’s as if you’ve always been in touch for the past five years; it’s as if Yoongi has never aged and you never drifted apart.

“You’re awake,” he remarks, greeting you first before your mom could even register your presence.

“You’re still here,” you reply, the exhale that leaves you making you deflate in reflection. Breakfast isn’t ready yet, but Yoongi’s already slid over a plate to you.

“There. Just how you like them.”

There’s tangerines with barely any pith on them, and iced tea that had more ice cubes in them than there are in the freezer.

Yoongi smiles at you like you’re the old you again; the one who is more forgiving, and the one who is more hopeful.

( ♡ )

If it wasn’t for your brother guilt-tripping you into joining the impromptu road trip, you never would have come.

You didn’t want to come with them in the first place because the very thought of hanging out with Namjoon and Yoongi like old times, this time with the addition of the latter’s son, was too close; too familial. The three already knew each other and had kept in touch and you’re the odd one out. You’re the only planet out of the system and once you’ve come to think of it, that bit of their galaxy never failed. Whether you were in it or not didn’t matter — atleast that’s what you thought.

Yoongi got everything he ever wanted and you’ve heard nothing about it.

You blocked his number and on every social media account he had to his name. Even with Namjoon as a prominent variable, you’re amazed to how you’ve heard little to nothing about Yoongi ever since he left your hometown. You still talked to your brother, of course, but there was an obvious difference to how your conversations went because none of them ever went to Yoongi.

You didn’t tell him to not talk about Yoongi at all. You didn’t instruct him to never utter a single word about his closest friend whom you also grew up with. You never told Namjoon anything concerning Yoongi and what unfolded between the two of you before you left, and yet, it’s almost as if he had already been in your mind and knew exactly what to do.

You’ve come to realize that the prospect of growing up never used to be in your cards. The whole concept of it sat at the very back of your mind, the only times you used to pay attention to it being whenever Yoongi picked at your brain.

You thought your world would have ended when you were 19. You didn’t think you would grow up and see past high school. You didn’t think you would finish college, much less pick a degree to pursue in the first place. You didn’t think of having a future — you didn’t think you’d be living it now in this way.

“Joon,” you mutter, voice barely being heard at the expanse of the balcony you’re in. It’s his balcony in his vacation house he barely stays in, overlooking the waves by the beach he isn’t even that fond of to begin with.

Yoongi and Haneul are already asleep, the father-son duo knocking out way ahead than everyone else. They stayed with the two of you in the balcony hours ago, the bug spray in both the adult and kid edition being proof of it.

Tonight, alone, felt different. It’s as if the younger version of you was gazing out to what was supposed to be your future, except neither the past nor present variant of you could have ever had it for yourself.

“Hm?” he hums, sipping the last of his drink while he’s sat at the far end. You know about each other’s presence, and while years ago, the two of you would’ve been giddy staying in a house as grand as this whilst drinking behind your mom’s back, you and Namjoon grew up. You didn’t fight or anything — you simply grew up and grew apart.

“I never said it before, but thank you,” you exhale, clenching Haneul’s towel as you try to warm your hands. You may have spent the better part of the day not even acknowledging his dad, but you did fawn over him like you would with any other child. “Thank you for not telling me a thing about Yoongi.”

“You’re welcome,” Namjoon finally speaks as soon as he grasps what you were talking about, the smile on his face only lasting for a second. “If it were up to me though, I would have told you everything.”

“Good thing it’s not up to you, hm?” you laugh uneasily, running your hand through your hair. You didn’t know how much you had to be grateful for until Yoongi came back and reminded you of how little you knew about him.

Namjoon breathlessly laughs, looking up at the sky to try and condense everything that has happened through his words before you leave again. “I would have told you that he confessed what happened that time you ran away from home a couple years back, and I beat his ass. We didn’t talk for like, I don’t know, three months? Even when I was still training in the US that time.”

Your lack of a reply is what makes him take notice, the stunned look you have on your face making him snort.

“What?” he questions, eyebrows furrowed as he throws a stray bottle cap at you. “Why are you so shocked? I love him like a brother, but you’re my actual sister,” he confides his loyalty to you, yet you don’t even have a second to express your awe before he opens his mouth again. “I would have told you that I became the best man at his wedding. Even mom was there.”

“You can stop telling me these things now.”

Namjoon exhales, already feeling deep in his chest that you’re gearing up to leave. He wants to get the last word in, not to prove himself, but to try and vindicate you and the quiet suffering you endured without telling anyone.

“I would have told you that Yoongi kept trying to come back to you.”

( ♡ )

Haneul wakes up before Yoongi does.

You’re confused for a second because the moment you hear the lightest footsteps that you ever could pad along the kitchen, you become completely disoriented. There’s a child that looks like Yoongi, wandering off to where you are.

For the briefest second, your heart drops because the whole situation resembles a vignette. In another lifetime, it could’ve been your child, your Haneul, waking up before his dad, trudging to the kitchen where you are is if you’re his mom.

He’s an observant kid, far too trusting unlike his dad who used to scold you to hell and back for even entertaining strangers that asked you for directions. He’s friendly to you; to someone Yoongi had introduced as appa’s close friend. There isn’t even a single hint in how he introduced you to Haneul that the two of you stopped being close. Yoongi didn’t leave the faintest indicator to him that you most probably hated his guts and would probably choose a lifetime where he hadn’t even been in your life at all.

Haneul is innocent to yours and Yoongi’s history and it’s going to stay that way. You don’t meant to change whatever he introduced you as because by the time your mom’s birthday week is over, or by the time Yoongi takes the hint and leaves your hometown again, you would be a fleeting persona in Haneul’s life.

You’re not his mom. You’re not anyone of significance to either him and his dad.

“Good morning,” he greets shyly, his diction telling of how just attentive Yoongi is as a dad. You mostly listened to whatever Namjoon told you last night anyway, tuning out the parts where he rounded to how Yoongi had been miserable not having any contact with you (you don’t believe that at all), and instead zeroing in on the large details that you’ve missed. “Auntie.”

You smile tightly, patting the empty seat beside to you to which he climbs effortlessly.

Haneul doesn’t know you, but you do know him. You know that his dad is a doting, slightly paranoid one whose current dilemma is whether or not enrolling him in kindergarten early or waiting for one more year. You know that Yoongi doesn’t want him to know about the existence of iPads for probably ever, so he spends almost every waking moment talking to him to the point that Haneul’s eloquent at speaking for his age. You also know that Namjoon’s his godfather, and that he had looked after him for a whole day by himself when Yoongi went to settle his divorce.

Haneul doesn’t know you, but you know his parents. You know Yoongi is his dad, and more importantly, that Hyewon is his mom — the same Hyewon who had been with him in your room before, and the same woman Yoongi shared his success with when he made it big.

“Hi,” you greet him softly, handing him his bottle for him to drink from. It’s a warm, domestic vignette for a split second. You’ve watched Yoongi far too many times at the corner of your eye to know where he gets the distilled water. “Why are you up already?”

“Uncle Joonie promised yesterday we can watch the sunrise together,” he says in between sips, letting you comb his hair into order unconsciously. You didn’t even think of it before your hand sweeps the strands scattered on his forehead, the hum you have at the back of your throat pausing when you realized what you’ve done.

“He’s still sleeping right now. He had uh, a long night,” you mutter, at a loss for a child-friendly alternative word for hangover. You keep your hands to yourself because you fear falling into the domesticity that isn’t yours to relax into; if you think about it for a second longer, you’d think that Haneul is yours and Yoongi is the final piece to your puzzle.

“Oh. But I, I wanna watch,” Haneul frowns, brows softly furrowed at your revelation. He’s not close to throwing a tantrum, but the upset expression on his face keeps tugging at your heart to cave.

“You can take your dad with you,” you offer, willing to knock on Yoongi’s door if it meant his son smiling again.

Haneul shakes his head at that, looking up at the ceiling as he recalls the events of last night before being tucked in. “Nuh-uh. Appa had a long night too. He just kept crying.”

A part of you wishes that Haneul didn’t speak so clearly.

“What?” you clarify, heart skipping a beat the more you replay his words in your head.

“Crying?” Haneul repeats, tilting his head as he tries to figure you out. He says it again for a third time as if you needed any clarification of the word and not because of your disbelief that his dad was capable of it. “Like this,” he adds, pretending to bawl with his hands wiping at his eyes.

The scene before you is your brief moment of reprieve, making you chuckle breathlessly as you try to regain your senses. Whether or not Haneul was sure of what he was saying, if Yoongi had cried, it’s most probably not because of anything that has to do with you.

“Oh. So that’s what it means. Thank you, Haneul,” you laugh lowly, patting him on the head until you retract your hand again in realization.

Haneul thinks nothing of your trepidation; he thinks nothing of the yearning behind your eyes, and thinks nothing of the tremble in your voice.

“Can we watch the sunrise together?” he asks, eyes looking up at you as if doing so would be the equivalent of hanging the stars up for him in the sky.

(Read: it probably is, and in another lifetime, or in the far-shot that it happens in this one, you’d do it if he asks you to do so.)

You want to ask Haneul why it’s you who he wants to accompany him, but you don’t. You can wake up either Yoongi and Namjoon to go with him instead, but you won’t.

In another lifetime, this would have been your son, your Haneul asking to watch the sunrise with you. There’s a Yoongi-shaped hole and a Haneul-shaped vacancy in your chest, but you don’t prod about it further.

You don’t question what’s happening, and maybe, just maybe, there’s a tiny part of you that wants to fully accept it instead of hesitating to do so.

“Okay.”

Haneul puts his hand in yours, but you don’t pull away. You just hold him tighter.

( ♡ )

A large part of you forgot that for as long as Yoongi’s here, he’ll treat every interaction you have with Namjoon as an open invitation for him. He had always been this way; for as long as you could remember, he’ll include himself even if he isn’t needed nor wanted.

You can’t count the amount of times your mom had berated Namjoon for something and oddly enough, Yoongi also happened to be there. Whether it was to rat out on his own best friend or being at the receiving end of said scolding, Yoongi jumped at every opportunity to come along as a package deal.

When you asked Namjoon to drink with you at the balcony two days ago, Yoongi butted in and asked what brand of alcohol he should buy you at the convenience store. When you were on the way home and asked your brother what he wanted from the rest stop, Yoongi said he wanted the biggest can of coffee you could find.

And when you asked Namjoon what time you should come to the stadium to watch him practice, Yoongi said he’ll pack you an extra cap while Haneul bonded with your mom.

Sometime long ago, you and Yoongi saw each other eye to eye. You can’t determine when and how exactly, but there was a point in your life where everything you had to say to each other was what the other was thinking all along. Nowadays, you can’t even look at Yoongi in the eye while all he wanted was for you to return his gaze.

If there’s just one thing though, one single variable that remained unchanged between the two of you, it would be Namjoon.

The way Yoongi engages you in conversation this time around is not to trap you and to ramp himself up to apologize again, but purely, it’s to talk about your brother. Namjoon’s a lot of things, and one thing you pray would remain unchanged is the love you have for each other.

“Who would have thought, right?” Yoongi nudges, asking you sincerely. “Who would have thought that the Namjoon who had knockoff cleats years ago would become this world-famous athlete?” he chuckles, shaking his head as he once again tries to digest the fact that this very stadium in your hometown had been built and refashioned in his honor.

You laugh genuinely, the sound being the first he’s ever heard in such a long time.

“Abibas.”

Yoongi has his lips parted, shocked that you were even answering him.

“Abibas. That was the brand of his knockoff cleats,” you chuckle, bowing your head as you try to contain your laughter. “He could’ve bought the original with his allowance and everything, but he split it so he could also buy me knockoffs.”

Yoongi laughs at the memory you jog up in his mind, remembering distinctly how Namjoon kept asking for his opinion repeatedly on which colorway of the knockoff pair he should gift you.

Even if things are still tense between you, even if Namjoon is the only salvation that Yoongi could bring up in a conversation to which you don’t run from, nothing from the past five years could ever take this moment away from you.

The three of you have grown up. Some faster than they’d like, and some because they had no choice but to — nonetheless, in this moment, it’s the three of you back at home like it used to be.

“Namjoon was always meant for greatness. Even from the start,” you murmur, your attention waiting on Yoongi’s response even if your eyes were on Namjoon in the field.

“You are too,” he interjects quickly, voice defensive at the lack of your name to your own sentence.

“No I’m not,” you snort, crossing your arms. You’re not angry when you say it; in fact, you’re calm as if you’ve always seen it coming. “You told me I’d amount to nothing.”

You’re calm, seemingly at peace with what you just said and what Yoongi had ingrained in your head before, but he’s the furthest thing from it. His mouth hangs open, chest tightening impossibly as he shakes his head eagerly.

“I never said that!”

You’re about to counter him when you hear a familiar holler reach you at the lower section of the bleachers, eyes perking to see a familiar figure who isn’t blood-related to you.

“Y/N!” Jimin runs up to you faster than to whenever he passes the ball to Namjoon, engulfing you in a massive hug that forces you up to your feet before you know it.

“Oh my god, Jimin! I didn’t know you were gonna be here!” you awe at the sight of him, unwilling to break away from the embrace until he does so. It’s been ages since you’ve seen him, the second-best player in the team (you’re biased because of course Namjoon had been the best player to you since you were kids) being the closest member to you out of everyone.

Jimin doesn’t care for Yoongi. He knows of the guy and he doesn’t want to know any more than he already does. He doesn’t even acknowledge the guy’s presence; all he does is squeeze you tighter and twirl you briefly in his arms.

“Fuck, me neither. Heaven must’ve healed my ankle quicker so I could come here and see you,” he flirts playfully, earning a well-deserved eye roll from you.

“And you know, play for Korea.”

“Eh. That too, I guess,” he shrugs, sitting at the seat beside you. He looks straight at you and only you — Jimin only pauses to snort to himself when he notices that Yoongi’s squirming in his seat, beyond annoyed and frustrated.

( ♡ )

On the fifth day of Yoongi staying over at your house, there’s a power outage.

The sound of everything shutting off together in sync makes you jolt, the collective groan you hear outside from the neighborhood comforting you in solidarity.

You can only make out a grunt from Namjoon and a gasp from your mom until you hear the trembling voice of Haneul, the sound of a cry that crawls up his throat putting everyone on their feet.

“Oh baby, it’s okay, it’s okay! It’s just a little dark, that’s all,” Yoongi pipes up instantly, scooping him up in his arms without having to fumble for where he is because he could practically locate his son in his sleep.

You didn’t want for it to be a power outage, but oddly enough, you feel sorry that it happened while you’re here. “It’s okay, Haneul,” you whisper as consolation, the dark of the night shielding you from how Yoongi’s eyes widen at your cooing for his son. “Mom, where did you put that generator I got you?”

“About that,” she sheepishly shrugs, turning on her phone to illuminate her shyness. “I donated it last year to the public school nearby.”

“It’s gonna get so hot,” Namjoon groans, the sound of him clumsily feeling around for the lights alerting Haneul briefly. He comforts him instantly, finally turning on the torch in his phone instead of relying on his instincts. “Don’t cry, Haneul, alright? Uncle Joonie’s gonna get the candles and the flashlights.”

“I’ll go try to find a guy,” you get up as soon as Namjoon hands you a flashlight, your contribution to help instantly being shut down.

“You can’t just try to find a guy, Y/N. That’s dangerous,” Yoongi scoffs, putting a hand on your forearm to pull you.

“I meant on my phone, Yoongi,” you grit. “I was gonna go outside to try and look for a signal.”

“That’s still dangerous,” he narrows his eyes at you as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

“Give me a break,” you mutter, removing his hold from you. You’d save your pride and actually go outside if not for your mom interjecting that she knows an electrician from her contacts.

Namjoon comes back after his quest for battery-powered fans and flashlights, unaware of how Yoongi’s protective streak for you practically never disappeared; in fact, it came back twofold. “Whole neighborhood’s out. Must be a broken transformer or something.”

Your mom consoles Haneul in her arms.

Namjoon waits by the gate for the electrician.

You and Yoongi clean the fridge up before anything spoils.

In between getting food out and embracing Haneul every now and then who insisted on obediently sitting atop the counter so he’s closer to his dad, Yoongi holds your hand.

“That’s my hand that you’re holding,” you murmur, assuming that he had mistaken yours for Haneul’s as he’s always chuckled how yours always seemed to be small against his.

Yoongi only hums.

“I know.”

( ♡ )

You’re falling back into your old routine.

Maybe it’s how your mom has to shake you awake because otherwise, you’d sleep through the afternoon and would therefore be unable to sleep through the night. On the other hand, it could be Namjoon who either hounds you to hang out with him or tell you off for clinging to him too much.

Maybe, it’s just Yoongi. It’s him who’s tricking your brain into thinking that has nothing changed with the way he keeps peeling fruits for you and telling you to be safe even if you’re only buying ice cream from the convenience store.

It’s only been a week and a half of almost normalcy, save for the fact that there are certain things and connections you can neither reverse nor rekindle.

You’re convinced, almost fully convinced that history is repeating itself except for the bitter, ugly parts of it that you never want to pop in your head again.

Like the past, Namjoon blocks you for whatever reason in his head but this time he does it to you while you’re on the way to your room, on the quest to retrieve your charger for your phone that you barely even used for work purposes.

“It’s my room. Why can’t I go in my room?” you furrow your brows at him, your amusement turning into annoyance the more that Namjoon pushed you with actual strength instead of playfulness.

“Are you hungry? Let’s go out for dinner,” he changes the subject quickly, turning you towards the stairs.

You shouldn’t have questioned him further — you should’ve left it at that.

“I guess? I’ll just get my purse,” you concede, dodging his attempts to haul you downstairs.

“I’ll pay,” Namjoon insists and although it’s not out of the blue for him, his franticness is what keeps you on edge.

“I still need my-…” you counter, being interrupted when he holds you firmly as you attempt to walk towards your door. Namjoon grips you with a silent plead, one that you can’t even decipher. “What the fuck is going on with you?”

You finally break off his grip at once, walking into your room with a renowned determination.

It’s not only your routine that falls back into place, but it’s your whole worldview that does.

Love is terribly human. It’s a loose thread on your shirt that gets snagged on your doorknob. It’s a coat in your closet waiting to be worn for the supposed perfect time, and when you do, you realize that it no longer fits you.

Love is terribly human, and it is terribly Yoongi, Hyewon, and Haneul.

Love is terribly human and fragile, and it’s Yoongi, Hyewon, and their son sleeping on your bed.

[absolutebl]

TOP 10 BL Trends of 2023

This is just me with my analysis hat on. 

1. 2023 = the year EVERYONE went outside their lanes

Everything went topsy-turvy this year in BL. 

For example, Korea gave us agonized yearning and outright queerness (The 8th Sense, The New Employee) while Japan served up soft office workers and tender family (Our Dining Table). 

The BL world went askew for a while, especially in the spring of 2023. 

Not that we still didn’t still get Korea’s soft angsty bubbles or Japan’s “what are you doing and why does it hurt?” kink-fests. But there were quite a few BLs that made us chronic watchers sit up in confusion and wonder if Korea was dabbling in Taiwan’s territory or Japan in Thailand’s. Then they fudged the kisses and we were like... okay, back in familiar territory. 

In contrast, Thailand stayed course-correcting for the damage they’ve done in the past with tropes (2022) and self referential meta criticism (2021), but also almost aggressively returned to their BL roots after last year’s series of shockers. Certainly, they are reexamining those roots, transplanting some, aerating others. But they really went back to classic Thai university and high school BL and pulps in a big way in 2023. 

Taiwan is always difficult to gage because they produce so few but they seem to have stuck with what they do best with no deviation while producing more this year than they have in ages. I’m happy for that, why change a good thing? But there is a tiny part of me that really wants them to hit it out of the part with a quality piece soon. For me, We Best Love still reigns supreme, but I would really like the HIStory franchise to give us that level but longer - like a happy version of Your Name Engraved Herein. I think Taiwan has the chops to give us something as good as The 8th Sense or Old Fashion Cupcake but in their style, and I would like to see them exercise their talent for good rather than just profit. 

I know, what a very odd thing for me to say. But if any BL is going to break into the mainstream American market, I genuinely think it’s most likely come from Taiwan. 

Vietnam and the Philippines are falling behind, in general. They just didn’t bring out very many shows in 2023, and what the brought out tended to fub the endings. This is forgivable in Japan (because of their style and quality) but not what watchers want in the lower production value propositions. In other words, if you do a pulp, you can’t mess up the ending (by romance standards). that doesn’t look to be changing anytime soon. 

2. The Office Romance Dominated

After years of Thailand serving us an endless (and slightly bland) buffet of university (and a few high school) BLs, this year Korea was basically like...

Ofiice. We like the Office. It’s cheap to film we can use grown up actors, acting (mostly) their actual age. 

And yeah... it totally worked. 

To be fair, Japan has always given us office live action yaoi from the beginning (they had the source material) but this year everyone else, including Thailand, seriously started playing in this setting. 

3. Boys Danced with Boys

The darling @heretherebedork​ was a big fan of this one, and I rather like it myself. Prior to this boys dancing together was very very rare in BL, but this year we got way more than our fair share. It was lovely. 

Never Let me Go

My School President 

Bed Friend 

The Day I Loved You 

Step by Step

Be Mine Superstar

Tie the Not 

Dangerous Romance

I think there were a few more. These are the ones I remembered to write down. 

4. Getting (even more) Meta With Tropes 

BL has been getting more and more meta over the past few years but this year they really focused in on tropes specifically. Calling out their own biggest and most favorite tropes in a massive way, especially Thailand and especially GMMTV. 

Like they tunneled in on damaging tropes with Bad Buddy and the like over the past 2 years, and now they are just having fun with us. 

I mean they just started the dancing trope and already they are calling it out? That’s like rapid-fire regurgitated meta there, GMMTV. 

5. Cameos are the norm now 

Taiwan has always loved cameos but in the past the other countries have been show and steady with only one or two a year. (Unless Japan does a parody.) 

This year Korea got in on the game.

Korea rarely starts trends but they do adopt smaller and lesser known existing ones and make them super popular. 

This year they did that with cameo couple appearances, even borrowing a few of Thailand’s pairs (TutorYim and MaxNat traveled north). They did it so much I stopped tracking. Love Class 2, Why R U?, and Jun & Jun were the heaviest hitters. 

Taiwan, of course, came back swinging. Kiseki was the gum-ball machine of pair cameos. (In Taiwan mafia = gay.) 

6. We are entering the cross pollination age

The number of remakes picked up or started this year was startling, not just countries revisiting their own content (Thailand, Japan) but countries revisiting OTHER countries stuff.

Lemme explain...

Korea has started remaking Thai content (Why R U?) alongside cameo'ing Thai pairs.

Thailand is doing Korean IP (My Dear Gagster Oppa) and has 2 Chinese ones slated for next year. 

GMMTV acquired a lot of Japanese IP (Cherry Magic, Ossen, and My Love Mix Up) - and then had problems distributing it. 

This is probably the most surprising trend for me. Especially the Japanese stuff. I would have thought these properties well outside of Thailand's price range (even GMMTV's) not to mention Japan’s legendary IP issues (I swear I typed this pout before the pulled TayNew’s excellent Cherry Magic). 

Also why not option some of the older popular manga instead? Bet that's much cheeper. (I did see a NEW Thai translation of Finder into Thai, which is 90s yaoi, so I have my fingers crossed on that front.)

I shouldn't be too surprised. 

Thailand is running out of y-novel content. Their publication industry is just not robust enough (I was just talking to a friend about this at length recently). But I didn't think they had the funds to option, especially from Japan. 

Perhaps the option deals are for peanuts?

7. Korea got cheeky

I’m not sure quite how else to put this. 

After finally figuring out boys can kiss, Korea started to do not just higher heat but playful higher heat, with more aggressive word play and linguistic innuendo, like they are entering their racy rom-com teenage years (Why R U? Love Class 2 and Jun & Jun in particular.) 

I guess: Welcome to your BL teens, Korea? 

It’s cute of them. I am very much enjoying it. 

And now that comedy is warming them up, we get to see them play with actual queer burgeoning physicality in shows like The 8th Sense. 

It’s nice. I like seeing Korea stretch its wings. They still stick to their bubble, but that bubble seems to be expanding. 

8. The Amnesia Trope is back

And I, for one, would prefer to forget about it. 

9. BL got trendy 

I’m not quite sure how to articulate this category but basically we started seeing a lot of “modern” romance trends out of the west (like a/b/o) show up in our BL. Not a ton and sometimes quite small, but there has a been a steady rise of things like: no seme/uke, femme gay, out gay, condom use, messy gay. 

We also got an increasing range of sub genre frameworks (like mafia, office setting) that’s moved BL pretty firmly (even in Thailand) out of school and into the workplace, whether actual working is involved or not. 

It’s not to the point where it feels like we get more non-school BL than school BL (if I include all countries in this assessment).

Japan, in classic Japanese fashion, quietly started moving in the opposite direction. It’s what they do. 

10. The Vampires are coming 

This is an announcement trend, which I don’t usually report on but it’s so CLEAR. 

So last year we had a spate of announcements of possible Omegaverse (2 from China, 1 from Japan, 1 from Thailand - the only one that’s happened). 

This year we got 5 Vampire (or vampire-esk) Thai BLs announced including one from GMMTV. 

Whether all 5 will actually get made is unlikely, but having had (basically) none prior to this (Kissable Lips), I’m pretty confident that we will get at least 2 of them. And I wouldn’t be surprised if at least one other country made one as well. (Side eyes Taiwan with interest.) 

Final thoughts

It feels like we are also seeing a decline in BL (both by quantity and quality) from Vietnam and the Philippines. As you all know, I don’t track or really watch either of these two very closely. But it feels like, now, no one else is either. 

I think we have likely seen the BL heyday already in both places and their industries are now on the decline. 

We might be witnessing a thinning in the players in the BL field. 

FYI we had approximately 

136 BLs in 2023

Previous Years

2022: 117

2021: 95

2020: 62

2019: 40

2018: 30 

2017: 44 (China’s last gasp)

2016: 27

2015: 17 (50% micro)

2014: 17 (50% micro)

And that’s it! Let me know in the comments if you’ve spotted any additional trends you want to call out.

Last year, 2022′s trend report

2021′s Trend report

Last Year’s Stats & Predictions

(source) 

[inuyashaluver]

hello!! can i request a mlt fic where her and reader adopt a dog and all the man u girls go and visit them!

mumma life - maya le tissier

maya le tissier x reader

description: in which you and your girlfriend adopt a puppy, both of you loving the mother life

warnings: fluffy, swearing

a/n: maya baby! this is too cute, giving myle baby, thanks so much, enjoy!! ❤️❤️

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you and your girlfriend, maya had been dating for over 3 years and the both of you felt that something was just missing. you both wouldn’t miss the yearning looks you gave each other when you witnessed your friends taking that next step in the relationship.

“baby, look” maya gives you an exaggerated pout as she drags you by the hand on a little stroll through the park on your day off from training.

“maya, please, it’s the fourth time we’ve stopped” you groan, your girlfriend in response squeezes your hand and tugs you closer to her body. when she’s pleased with the distance, she pulls you into a tight embrace, starting a trail of kisses from the base of your neck up to the curve of your jaw.

you let out a shuddering breath and feel as maya’s lips upturn into your warm skin, she always did this when she wanted something and you both knew it.

“you know you want to” she whispers in your ear and your cheeks flush instantly, you grip her bicep warningly and she giggles at your pink cheeks. after a short staring competition followed by maya’s excessive pouting, you threw your head back in frustration and the girl in front of you smiles brightly. she’s got you.

“fine, le tissier, we’ll get a dog” you sigh, maya grins excitedly and lifts you in the air for a few seconds. you can’t help but laugh gleefully and maya relishes the sound.

as soon as she puts you down, she immediately gets down to business, discussing what type of dog, how you’ll take care of it, names, everything you could imagine, maya was talking excitedly to you.

—

about three weeks later, you and maya discussed all the formalities about the dog and both of you were extremely excited. maya in particular, causing quite a stir up amongst your teammates.

you were both extremely chipper at training, maya couldn’t keep her hands off you and everyone watched you both amusingly.

“why are you so happy?” ella points out in the change rooms after training, maya grins happily and places a hand on your stomach as she stands behind you. the team watches intrigued at the upcoming conversation.

“we’re going to hear little feet around the house soon” maya says shyly, kissing your cheek as you lean into her. everyone is looking at you with wide eyes.

“you’re fucking joking” mary breathes out, clutching ella’s arm in slight fear but also excitement.

“it’s early but i think we can tell you” maya giggles, her hand resting on your stomach beginning to move gently causing each teammate to gawk at you.

“did you get (y/n) pregnant?” millie exclaims, covering her mouth in utter shock. yours and maya’s eyes widen in shock, “w-what?” you stutter out, cheeks bright red, shaking your head quickly.

“what! no, you idiots! we’re getting a dog” maya barks, pulling you closer to her body as the team let out little sounds of understanding.

you can’t help but laugh at the reaction and maya pinches your hip warningly. after all the initial shock, all of the girls excitedly question anything and everything about the new addition to your little family and you both can’t contain your excitement either.

—

you’d both gone shopping for the new puppy, maya spoiling it rotten, it had you nervous for when you’d both actually have children.

she’d always excuse it with, “baby, we’re mums now, our little girl needs to have the best” she boasts, kissing you gently and convincing you instantly. you just can’t say no to her.

maya had gotten pulled for media after training and you were free for the rest of the afternoon, meaning, you were going to pick up the puppy and bring her home.

maya was slightly heartbroken, claiming you’d be the favourite mum already, “babe, i’m off” you wave from behind the camera as she sat down for an interview, she pouts at you and gestures for you to come over.

you roll your eyes amusingly but make your way over, she immediately pulls you into a tight hug, kissing the side of your head affectionately as she gently sways you both from side to side.

“me and baby will be waiting for you” you whisper in her ear, she squeezes your hips and gives you a quick kiss, ushering you off so she could get home faster.

as soon as you turn, she gives your behind a little smack and you shake your head in response, causing her to giggle when you don’t even turn around.

—

you and the puppy were waiting at home and you’ve cried of cuteness at least 6 times. she was perfect, she’s literally a dog but you felt like her biological mother and knew maya would feel the same.

you sit on the floor with the unnamed puppy playing with her new toys as you wait for maya.

when you hear the front door unlock, maya’s keys clang on the little table you had in your doorway. hurriedly taking off her jacket and shoes before rushing over to where you were.

when she saw you and the puppy looking up at her with loving expressions, she felt her heart stop. she coos at the sight, the puppy nervously wags her little tail as she approaches maya and sniffs her hand, immediately licking it and gesturing to be picked up.

“look at you, aren’t you the cutest?” she coos, cuddling the puppy happily. you can’t help but tear up again, seeing maya so happy.

maya glances at you in worry and moves to sit next to you, “why are you crying?” she giggles affectionately, puppy in one hand as she held your own with her other. “you two are so cute” you fuss, moving to rest your head on your girlfriend’s shoulder.

the puppy scrambles out of maya’s arms to play with a toy on the ground and you and maya cuddle up next to each other.

“what should we name this little angel?” maya smiles, you both brainstorm numerous names but none of them felt right. eventually, you and maya settle for the cliche of naming a brown dog ‘coco’ but it just felt right.

—

puppy training with maya was proving to be easier than expected. you both settled into a routine that just worked, maya making an effort to teach coco a bunch of tricks that make you giggle.

each time you would interact with the puppy, maya would swoon and look at you with the most love sick expression she could muster.

you both got home from training and you immediately go to find coco, lifting her up and cradling her to your chest. “say hi, mummy” you coo, looking at maya with a bright grin. maya’s cheeks are burning, coming over to greet the puppy before kissing you sweetly.

—

it took two days of you and maya fussing over your new puppy with endless amounts of bragging to the girls until they claimed enough was enough. they needed to meet their niece.

it was planned that whoever wanted to come needed to be in small groups, just so the puppy wasn’t too overwhelmed by the large numbers of people.

“what if she likes them more than us?” maya grips your leg tightly as you sat on the couch, the girl sitting on the ground between your legs.

“baby, you’re worrying for nothing, she’ll love you the most” you smile, wrapping your arms around her shoulders and kissing her cheek gently.

she hums and leans into you, coco wanderers over to the both of you, looking up with big puppy dog eyes and a frantically wagging tail.

you and maya immediately fangirl over the puppy, maya picking it up so you could both look at her with bright, affectionate grins, that’s when the doorbell rings and maya’s face drops.

“you’re fine, it’s okay” you mumble in maya’s ear, pressing a tender kiss to the side of her head, moving past her to open the door for the girls.

on the other side, you see millie, ella and mary standing there with eager smiles.

“where’s the little one?” mary says excitedly, you let them in and lead them to the living room to see a happy puppy bounding over to the new people and a scowling maya now sitting on the couch.

“someone’s happy to see us” ella says sarcastically, sending maya a little wink. “she’s a little protective over little coco at the moment” you say sheepishly, moving towards maya, the girl grabs your hips and forces you to sit next to her while the three girls fuss over the little bundle of joy.

maya instantly wraps her arm around yours to hold you close, you smile at her and she can’t help but smile back, nudging you with her shoulder before looking at the girls interact with coco, a little smile evident on her features.

“she looks just like you, maya” mary teases, causing maya to scoff with wide eyes, “excuse me?” she exclaims, “no, she really does, you have the same eyes” millie quips, looking between coco and maya, ella starts laughing immediately.

maya gawks at the girls, “now that you mention it-” you start, maya instantly places a hand over your mouth when you start talking at looks at you warningly. you giggle and stop but maya still holds you close.

the girls stayed around for a couple hours, you snapping pictures with them and uploading them to social media had fans going crazy.

as soon as the girls were gone, coco looks up at maya with a soft expression and you both move to sit on the couch again. with a sleeping coco cuddled up in maya’s lap, you both watch a movie with your heads resting against each other.

“see? she knows who her mummy is” you tease, kissing maya’s cheek when her pout is formed on her face. you reach out to pat coco’s head gently as you snuggle into maya.

“i can’t wait to have kids with you” maya whispers affectionately, her eyes trained where you gently pet your shared puppy.

“me too” you quip back instantly, looking over at each other with shy grins. it took about 15 minutes for the three of you to fall asleep, snuggled up together on your couch without a care in the world.

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

liked by ellatoone and 44,232

mayaletissier: hot mamma (y/n/n) and her cute baby (and coco’s there too)

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yourname: maya le tissier!

↳ mayaletissier: that’s me, baby

↳ yourname: don’t credit your daughter like that

↳ mayaletissier: i love my daughter and her mum!

yourname: coco supremacy

↳ mayaletissier: we made that

1maryearps: baby coco is perfect

millturner_: cutest puppy in the world

ellatoone: i’m her favourite auntie

↳ 1maryearps: don’t even start

[nctsworld]

midnight memories

✩‌ jeno x reader | established relationship | fluff | suggestive | 1.1k

SUMMARY | in which you spend new year's eve on the streets of paris with your boyfriend. // part of the connection series

WARNINGS | steamy make-out session, some handsy pda in an alleyway, brief voyeurism from strangers who pass by, suggestive themes implied post-fic

RATING | mature

AUTHOR'S NOTE | i'll eventually get the other fics out for this series, but for now, take this gift~ happy holidays and happy new year's everyone! hope y'all enjoy <3

TAGLIST | @sehunniepot

The City of Love is a sight to adore.

You revel in the beauty of Paris while running around the warmly lit streets hand-in-hand with the love of your life, laughing in delight and weaving through small groups of people. Not too fast though, as the cobblestones are still damp from the rainfall several hours ago.

Jeno feels lucky that tonight's sky is clear and that the atmosphere is filled with a mere breeze. Although he would be happy to spend New Year's Eve with you under any circumstances, he wants tonight to be perfect.

He can't help it; he always wants everything to be perfect for you.

There weren't any particular plans for this getaway. You two decided to travel here on a whim since you never go anywhere for the holidays.

Dinner tonight was at a lavish restaurant that Jeno's best friend recommended to try if he was ever in Paris. You make a mental note in the back of your mind to remember to thank Jaemin for the great recommendation.

Dessert was more casual—delectable goods from a local bakery that was nearby the restaurant. They were the perfect amount of sweetness to satisfy your cravings.

And now, after walking off the food, you're now exploring the streets aimlessly. No Google Maps, no sense of direction, no plans whatsoever.

Who cares where you end up, as long as you have each other?

You squeal in surprise as Jeno tugs you to one side of the street between two narrow buildings. A soft glow casts above you from the faraway lamppost and the shining moon, but besides that, the area is mostly dark and privy to the streets.

His lips find yours, capturing them ardently. Normally, he's tender from the get-go, but not tonight.

Perhaps it's because you're in Paris, perhaps it's because it's New Year's Eve, or perhaps it's simply because he's utterly in love with you even after years of being together, but he's desperate to show you how much you mean to him tonight.

Jeno presses himself against you and you're pinned between him and the brick wall. Deep kisses ensue with the occasional dipping of his tongue and the firm palming of your neck, your face, and the side of your waist covered by the skin-tight black dress of yours he loves so much.

Passion courses further as his lips traverse downward your neck. Your body reacts eagerly by fisting his black t-shirt and loose brown suit jacket.

Every part of your body is on fire, yearning for his attention, and he tries to give the appropriate care where he can. If not your pretty mouth, your neck. If not your neck, your bare shoulders. His touch grasps what his mouth can't reach in this standing state—your waist, your ass, your barely covered thighs.

The more you reach for him in want, the more his jacket begins to fall off his sturdy frame. The tables switch when your mouth latches onto his exposed skin, sucking at the side of his neck right above his clavicle. He hisses at the sensation, followed by a soft moan.

It takes all of Jeno's willpower to not take you right then and there in the alleyway, but he knows he'll have you all to himself tonight—all the way until morning breaks and your body can't handle it anymore.

Right as Jeno is about to cup your breast, some nearby hollers and whistles of young boys across the street breaks the moment, reminding you of the reality that you're still in public.

Your love drops his hand and tips his forehead against yours. Despite the broken high, you're both panting and smiling, knowing this won't be the end of tonight's shenanigans. After a quick glance at his watch, Jeno takes you by the hand again and says you two should try to head towards the river to watch the fireworks.

Along the way, you stop by to admire a beautiful stone fountain with a few God-like statues branching out from the stem.

Another glance at his watch, and Jeno remarks how it's coincidentally 11:10pm. Quickly, you ask if he has a coin on him for you to throw in order to match the perfect timing for an 11:11 wish.

He nods, but there's a flash of a clandestine smile you're unsure what to make of from him; it fades right as he rummages through his pant pocket for one.

Facing the fountain, you close your eyes and think of a wish.

The wish is nothing grand, just hope that things will mostly be the same as they are right now because you're already so happy with your current state of life. You love your job, you love where you are right now, and you love who you're with.

A splash and a smile later, your eyes flutter open.

Beside you, Jeno is on one knee with a small opened box in his hand.

You gasp, pressing your palm against your slack-jawed mouth.

Since you're in complete shock, the proposal is honestly a blur.

All that matters though is the earnest look in his eyes as he asks you to be the one for him for the rest of his life, the many yeses you say between the happy tears, how perfect the ring fits, and hugging Jeno tightly as he swings you mid-air.

You try to add extra pressure in each hug like it's a promise, telling him that you're his. Always have been, always will be.

Laughing off the tears and not wanting to be late for the New Year's celebration, you jog towards the sparkling river to have a better sight of the Eiffel Tower's fireworks. You line up near the back of the large crowds, as is expected of tonight. Nevertheless, you're just grateful to be here on New Year's Eve in the City of Love with your boyfriend—now fiancé.

And soon enough, the countdown begins with your hand intertwined with his.

By huit, Jeno squeezes your left hand harder, his thumb gently grazing over the glimmering rock over your ring finger.

By cinq, you're gazing into each other's eyes.

By trois, he's palming your face, not caring if he starts the kiss of the new year prematurely.

By un, you're one with each other, locked at the lips with your arms now slung over his shoulders.

The blasting of the fireworks and joyous yells of everyone occur in the background. When you finally pull away to breathe, he positions himself behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist.

He watches the magnificent colours streak through the sky continuously, but after a few moments, he catches you not paying an ounce of attention to them. Instead, you're fixated on him, and you're beaming back with one of the biggest grins he's ever seen on you.

Yes, the City of Love is a sight to adore.

But it's unparalleled to the sight of his entire world looking back at him with such immense affection; the brightest light shining back at him is one he never would've imagined he could stumble upon in this lifetime.

New Year's really couldn't get anymore perfect than this.

[sunnysidewrites]

Demon prince!Seungcheol

Inspired by this prompt: “I’m a demon, not a hot water bottle. Stop cuddling me.” “But you’re so warm.” “Like hell. Fire, brimstone, eternal burning.” It had absolutely no effect whatsoever, and the demon sighed, wrapping one arm around the other. This is my re-debut (although not sure if this counts as a re-debut or if it's just a one-time thing) after nearly a 6-year hiatus and needless to say I am extremely nervous and excited!!! (talking in idol terms luv that) I am hoping that also means my writing quality has matured as well (I think??? or not but guess we will find out)! This is for everyone who knew me back then and is still around to see this play out! sorry if it's not the best i am EXTREMELY rusty but hope you enjoy lovelies <3333

wow omg it’s great to dive into writing after so long im getting emotional

you know the drill folks let’s get to it!!

Humans and demons have lived in co-existence for centuries and it’s more or less a chaotic neutral environment given the unique circumstances of these 2 different… races?

It can be difficult to distinguish the demons with the humans since they try to blend in seamlessly for their own sense of peace and security

Despite a big chunk of demons integrating with humans, there are still parts around the world, albeit small, where they have their own territory to control

They usually operate in more traditional political systems, such as still maintaining kings and queens

Humans can live there as well, but it is predominantly demons who are seen as the norm and the former as commoners/lower class

You happen to be one of the lowly commoners who have been working as a maid in the castle since you were young

you and Seungcheol, the Crown Prince, were actually kinda close as kids!!

you could tell all he wanted to do was let loose and have fun but was forced to follow the rules and take everything seriously 24/7

even as a 5 y/o you could see how much he yearned to be a regular kid but duty calls :”((

there were many times you hung out together in secrecy since you as a lowly maid could not be caught DEAD associating yourself with someone of such a high status

and add being human on top of that!! <3

But Seungcheol didn’t care you were literally his first and only friend at the time

Any time a guard looked for him, he and you would duck somewhere to hide together, stifling your smol little giggles im dead

As he grew up and more burdens were placed on his shoulders, you could no longer keep the same innocent, playful friendship between the two of you

Your interactions with him went from running around in the garden to stealing quick looks at each other when you passed by him in the hallways

He went from a happy lil child to a very assertive, stoic man who always picked his kingdom over anything

Despite his new persona, he would occasionally still show you very rare displays of fondness??

You would sometimes randomly find gifts on your bed with a note and well it doesn’t take a genius to know who it’s from

“I swiped the last cookie for you before Penny stole it and I know you would become a demon yourself if someone took your sweets”

“I noticed your uniform was ragged and a little ripped so here’s a new set. be more careful or our next encounter won’t be as pleasant”

“Here’s an extra blanket loser don’t freeze to death on me”

Your heart feels warm knowing that he still shows you his softer side to you while he’s practically a statue to everyone else

Now you were both in your mid-twenties and he’s been busier than ever with political meetings and social gatherings

You were his main maid since out of all of the staff, you were the only one who could really put up with his absurd requests and got along with him in a manner no other maid could, even the older ladies

There were times he summoned you to his headquarters for the sole reason of wanting some company

He would bring up some dumb question and you would be like no offense but this is kinda useless

But little did you know he would do that intentionally to see you crack a little smile, maybe even a laugh in there since he’s been seeing you look more despondent lately

“Even though we can’t run around the palace like how we did as kids, I’m still here. I’m the same Seungcheol – well, actually not really but I still look out for your wellbeing”

“Thanks, not-the-same-Seungcheol”

It’s rumored that the Crown Prince is coming of age to take over the throne soon, but before doing so he needs to find a bride yes it’s one of those tropes ok deal with it

You’re cleaning the hallways one day with some other maids and you can’t help but overhear their gossip

“Did you hear Prince Seungcheol is now engaged??? I think it was just last week”

Your ears perk up and your scrubbing slows down slightly so you can focus on their conversation

“Yeah, I heard the woman is a princess from some neighboring kingdom… It’s really hitting soon that he’ll be the new king”

“I don’t know how long she is going to last… he’s so cold and doesn’t seem to care about anyone. but what can you expect from a demon?” 

They both giggle and move to another room to continue cleaning and you can’t help but feel fired up from the way they were talking about him as if they knew anything about him

Sure, he was not really the friendliest and was very brutally honest with his curt words but it didn’t make him a bad person

Your heart aches after hearing the news and you recall a past talk you had with Seungcheol when you were younger

“Do you believe in love?” you asked him, the both of you lying down on the grass while looking up at the vibrantly blue sky

“Pshh, not really. Father always said marriage is for the people, not for love”

“But shouldn’t you love someone in order to marry them? you will be spending the rest of your life with them”

“I don’t think that is what he wants from me. I would be letting him down”

“Is that what you really want, though? to be stuck with someone you have no feelings for?”

he sighs deeply and looks down. “Well, I guess not… I do care a lot for someone”

your heart dropped. guess he already has his eyes set on someone else. “o-oh, well that wouldn’t be fair to you or to them right?”

he shakes his head, quickly glancing at you before looking away. “but it wouldn’t work out anyway. I wouldn’t want to drag them into the mess of my world. I want them to be free of what I go through. I just hope they know I’ll always care for them from afar.”

You shake your head out of a daze, painfully reminded of how raw that moment still feels

I wonder if he still cares for that person he mentioned, you think to yourself as you continue scrubbing the tiles. But what does it matter now that his future is sealed with someone else?

Shortly after that day, it was formally announced to the kingdom that the Crown Prince and the soon-to-be Crown Princess will be holding a wedding ceremony in just a short few weeks

On the outside, you smile politely and clap your hands but it takes every fiber of your being to not want to fling the door to your cramped bedroom and collapse on your bed and spill the tears you were desperately attempting to hold in 

As you stared at him and his fiancee out the balcony waving to everyone, you swear you thought you saw him give you a forlorn look that lasted for a millisecond before he returned to his usual expressionless state

From that moment on, you barely saw Seungcheol at all

This man was constantly getting pulled in all different directions, especially with the royal wedding around the corner

The night before his big day, he summons you to his room again and your mind is buzzing with loads of thoughts of what he could possibly want to talk to you about

You cautiously enter and close the door slowly before turning back towards him

He looks more disheveled than usual, his hair tousled, his usual prince attire crinkled and slightly unbuttoned

“You look stressed, what's wrong??”

He closes his eyes and sighs for a moment before slowly opening them again and says while still not making eye contact with you, “I… I feel like I’ll have so many regrets once tomorrow comes”

You’re like why is that??

“Do you remember me mentioning I cared a lot about someone back then?”

Your heart drops to your stomach. “Yes… why?” thanks for the reminder

“I keep thinking about them… and all of these what-ifs. I know I can’t do anything about it, but–”

“Of course you can do something about it! I know you’re a stickler for the rules, but if the cost is your happiness, is it really well worth it?”

He shakes his head, looking even more troubled than before. “I can’t risk putting them in that position. Yet I… I want to,” he articulates slowly, as if it’s only dawning on him now that he’s finally learned what he truly feels

You feel as if the waves of heartache and anguish are drowning you but you try to be strong for him and present a smile if not for him, then for yourself

“I think you know what you need to do, Seungcheol”

And with those words, you quietly bow out and make your way to your room

The next morning, you wake up with puffy eyes from crying all night and begrudgingly get out of bed to get ready for the busy day ahead

After a hectic morning and afternoon, the ceremony finally begins

The moment we’re all waiting for is “Speak now or forever hold your peace”

And the most baffling thing happens because it’s not you who speaks up, not some secret lover, not some random citizen in the audience

but it’s Seungcheol himself

“Wait – I don’t think I can go through with this”

SCANDALOUSSSS

That’s right, he causes a whole uproar and everyone is like what tf is he talking about?!?!?

You are unfazed to a certain degree due to the conversation you had with him last night but you’re still confused on where this is going to go

Never in a million years would you have imagined for him to say his next words

“I’m in love with someone else: Y/N”

And all the maids around you gasp like WHAT. IS. HE. TALKING. ABOUT.

You aren’t sure whether to feel mortified or happy but whatever it is, all eyes are now on you

The current King is like MISTER?? WITH A H U M A N????

“I know it’s never been done before, having a demon and a human marry each other. but I’m tired of always having to do the right thing and for once, I want to do something that is right but for myself”

You’re looking at him in complete bewilderment and disbelief like you were talking about me this whole time??!!

“If we can prove that humans and demons can come together, it’ll be a huge stepping stone politically for everyone involved. I can’t change how I feel about her but I can change our worlds with her by my side”

He makes his way towards you and grabs your hand and this time he does not break eye contact even once

“I want to be with y/n, and no one else”

You’re melting like putty in his arms it’s honestly really sweet!!!

The King eventually caves in although he’s obviously not happy with all of their efforts wasted but he’s cool enough to welcome in this new change

Everyone’s reactions are pretty mixed understandably but they don’t seem like they hate it which is probably the best reaction you’re gonna get

“You’re not asking for my hand in marriage are you?? bc that’s a little too quick on a first date”

He shrugs and nonchalantly says, “Not until you’re ready” JESUSLFSJDS

The rest of the day is a whirlwind of crazy events that you get caught up in as the Crown Prince’s new lover now 

By the time it’s time for bed, he summons you for the last time as you being a maid and not as a Girlfriend

Well turns out he’s actually a big baby and the whole time he tried to conceal his feelings for you all he wanted was for you to be by his side pshh lame amiright

“You sure move fast with wanting me to be in your bed already and we haven’t even gone on an actual date yet”

“Shut up and just lay beside me”

After you turn off the lights and get under the covers, you can’t help but notice he’s extremely hot (literally and physically) and considering it’s 20 degrees you’re taking all of that warmth

Of course, Seungcheol tries to make it a big deal and get you off of him even tho he secretly enjoys it

“I’m a demon, not a hot water bottle. Stop cuddling me.”

“But you’re so warm.”

“Like hell. Fire, brimstone, eternal burning” 

Like that was gonna stop you who does he think he is for putting you through all of this and at the very least not giving you some cuddles???

He sighs and wraps one arm around the other after he notices your breathing slowing down

“I don’t have to care about you from afar anymore,” he murmurs, brushing your hair out of your face before also slowly losing consciousness

[imaginesbymonika]

“Shame” (Part 3)

A Pedro Pascal x fem!Reader fan fiction

Plot: For the last four years, Y/N and Pedro have been dating in secret. The fear of rejection has turned them into a mystery that could only be encountered in yearning looks on red carpets or hands that are touching one another briefly. However, for the longest time, things have been working out that way just fine. But now Pedro's agency wants him to have a PR relationship with another woman and neither Y/N nor Pedro is sure if their love is going to survive that.

Warnings: Mentions of anxiety, feelings of cheating, grief and eating disorders

She knows that she shouldn't do this. She can almost hear Pedro's voice in her ears, telling her to put the phone down, but it's accompanied by this deafening ringing so it doesn't matter. Y/N stares at her phone, unable to tear her eyes off the bright screen. She reads the tweets, every single one…god, it must be thousands of them. Voicing their very strong feelings about Pedro and his new girlfriend, Melissa. And Y/N wishes she could simply roll her eyes and whisper some vulgarism, but holy fuck Melissa is beautiful.

She has a body like a supermodel, even though she proclaims to love pizza and burgers- Y/N listened to her and she wanted to throw up. Maybe develop some sort of eating disorder, maybe the same one she has. She has that million-dollar smile, standing next to Y/N's million-dollar man… who right at this moment wasn't her man. It was Melissa's and the whole world thought so too. All Y/N could do was wait. Linger in the living room like a dog until Pedro returned to her.

In her head, she is agreeing with everyone else. Y/N wouldn't say it out loud but she does feel like she is grieving their relationship. Even though he is lying next to her at night, Y/N couldn't help herself but feel like a mistress. It made her so furious every single time, that she wanted to scream at the top of her lungs that none of this was fair and that she was here first. She had him first! But Y/N understands how pathetic that would sound, so she just remained silent.

Her eyes widen. Even if the majority weren't happy with this, they were happy that it wasn't…her. Those people have no idea but despite that they were relieved. Relieved that Melissa was older than her, more mature perhaps. Holy shit, Y/N tosses her phone to the side while a crazy lump of anxiety forms in her throat.

[lightlycareless]

Omg the toji threesome fic is just...wtf there's no other worlds to describe it it's wtf in a good way omg what if she gets pregnant? What if it's not naoya's?! WHAT WILL TOJI FJCKING SAY?! GET RID OF IT?! GIVE BIRTH AND GIVE IT TO ME?! WHAT WILL NAOYA DO?! OMGGGGG PLEASE MAKE A FIC ABOUT THE AFTERMATH AHHHH!!!!! if you want baby no pressure <3

Hello! :>

I don't know if you saw my sneak peak, but I ended up writing a sequel to this heheh I'm so glad you liked it!!

Ngl, I wasn't planning on writing more of it, but then I saw this ask and... you know, I just had to do it to 'em.

Anyways I won't say anything more; except for the warnings: mentions of infidelity. mentions of smut (the word cunt is used) angst I believe. it's sad at the end, or I try to make it sad lol. Mentions of pregnancy. Also, I am no expert relating to pregnancy matters so take it with a grain of salt and lots of plot convenience 😅.

Happy reading!!

sequel to this.

Toji’s not to disclose if you or Naoya came back for a repeat of that night’s succession, though he will admit your pregnancy was not surprising.

It’s not like he could run away from it either, for as soon as news graced the elders’ ears, it’s all the estate spoke of.

From enthusiasm to welcome the next generation of Zen’in sorcerers, to the ever-growing hope of recovering their prized cursed technique, which has been absent for hundreds of years…

Expectations for this child were at an all-time high.

But to you and Naoya, all you could care about was the blessing this baby represented.

A family.

The pinnacle of all their yearnings, the fruits of their never-ending efforts finally appearing as the positive pregnancy test you took one morning after feeling particularly nauseous…

Or Toji’s, perhaps.

Toji initially didn’t think much of the “shocking” announcement. Not even after his behavior that night—they were just heat of the moment things, nothing that he meant nor really cared about, simply said to get a rise out of Naoya; and oh, was his reaction satisfying.

In other words, he really, genuinely, couldn’t care less about what the wimpy heir and his ditzy wife were to face from that point forward.

But when their behavior towards him, the engaging conversations, invitations to drink tea, amongst other activities, drastically ceased, to the point of them turning on their heel and going the opposite way when bumping into him…

It didn’t take long for the pieces to fall into place, and when the puzzle was complete, Toji could only laugh.

It’s like an open secret, albeit solely for those involved.

The baby inside you wasn’t Naoya’s.

It was Toji’s.

And this filled him with morbid fascination no other high had been able to provide.

To know that the baby everyone was praising as the future of the Zen’in, a promising sorcerer, as expected of the heir, was the ultimate irony, the exact anti-thesis of all they once declared of Toji.

He was very tempted to let everyone know.

Proudly announce the truth to the world, screaming to the top of his lungs that that baby isn’t Naoya’s, it’s mine.

The scandal this revelation would bring was nothing short of earth-shattering, and more likely than not, the elders wouldn’t even know where to start from. Although your infidelity could be a good reference.

Followed by the fact that no matter how much they try to get rid of him, he’ll always find a way to haunt them—like a ghost shackled to the estate walls, Toji would always remain in the back of their minds, unsettling them whenever they did as much as breathe.

Although for this to work, he’d have to wait until the child was born, officiated as son of Naoya, before he could do any true damage.

To see the kind of face the Zen’in would make upon finding out the truth… is one that makes his prolonged stay all but worthwhile.

As well as knowing your reaction towards the whole ordeal—if you’ve even been able to sleep knowing well that your life was on the line by carrying such a frightening secret in your womb.

Considering the way you frequently sought him out during those lonely nights where your husband would be away for long periods of time, this probably didn’t perturb you as much. After all, what did you expect after receiving his seed as constantly as you did? That nothing would happen? No consequences to be suffered?

You were many things, but he never thought you as delusional.

Or perhaps, you were hoping for this. To have his child. He’d come to believe so after the tight way your cunt squeezed him.

Well, that would only make him the delusional one.

Either way, he suspects that while your secret might’ve prickled the back of your mind from time to time, it didn’t bother you as much as he hoped—not with the way your staff coddled your every move, how the clan would gift you expensive items to celebrate the future head of the clan, per tradition, or how happy you appeared to be with your growing bump, gently caressing it and beaming while confessing oh how much you longed to finally hold your baby.

It irked him.

To see that even through this deceit, you were still blissful.

It was undeserving. Wrong.

At least to the man who has been sentenced to nothing but pain and disgrace since the moment he was born, that’s how it was.

Because it was impossible for him to grasp the innocence of others—To accept that some were just simply… with better luck. Free to live as they desired, and without having to pay for the prejudice of others.

Toji, now more than ever, felt that he was being used. Plucked from his misery, toyed with, and discarded once dried out of his benefits.

Thus, his motivation to ruin your and Naoya’s happiness became as palpable as ever—hastily making his way towards you once catching you by one of the many gardens, intending to remind you of the power he had, how easily it would be for him to plant the seed of doubt amongst the staff, let it flourish up to the elders, and ruin your and Naoya’s life forever.

Unless your anguished face was to stop him.

It was abrupt, happening in less than a second, yet enough for him to understand it wasn’t because you were upset by some redundant folly, but rather, of pain.

With one of your hands rushing up to your stomach while the other to your back, it was as if the weight of your baby had suddenly become too much to handle; you’d then anxiously looked for a chance to sit down, frowning when realizing the only option was the strenuous engawa in front of you…

Before freezing, face quickly void of any color, when seeing Toji abruptly standing by your side, with mysterious intentions you were not interested in finding out.

“Toji, you— You breathe as you do your best to walk away from him, just for him to keep up with you. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Gee, that’s the thanks I get for getting you pregnant?” he sneers. “Never thought you to be as prejudiced as the rest—”

“What—what is wrong with you?!” you condemned, snatching your arm from his grasp. “How dare you?! Don’t you ever say something like ever aga—ah!”

“Y/N.” Toji’s eyes widen when he sees you lean forward, wrapping your arms around your stomach as you hiss and cuss, while tightly closing your eyes in what he recognizes strenuous pain. “What is happening?! Are you—”

No.

Could it be? And so soon?!

”Are you having the baby??”

“What? N—No—!” you whimper, squeezing tears out of the corners of your eyes. “It’s just—it’s just this pain that comes and goes sometimes—I—I need to sit down—”

Toji doesn’t hesitate to help you onto the engawa by firmly, yet gently, holding your arms and lowering you down to the wooden floor. You didn’t plan on accepting his help at first, but when a sharp pain reminds you that you couldn’t really pick and choose in this situation, you end up agreeing.

Once seated, Toji concludes this was much better off in the hands of a staff member, or even a doctor if he could somehow manage to do that, so he quickly stands up and turns towards the hallways—but the moment you see him take as little as a step away from you, your hands fly to grab his sleeve, stopping him on his tracks before looking up to him with the most pitiable look on your face.

“Stay.” You breathe, swallowing. “Please.”

And whether because of your pleading, teary eyes, or because it had been so long since he’d basked in your warm company, Toji obliges, soon taking the spot besides you as your hand now securely gripped his, with such an unprecedented force that has him both amused and concerned by your pain, while offering whatever little comfort he could with his touch.

It’s in these quiet yet tense moments that he finally gets to see the certainty of your situation.

While you expected to happily enjoy your future life as a mother, relish on the compliments of those around you, the praises of your in-laws, and the company and support of your husband…

Reality had been nothing short of deviant from your dreams—starting from the high risk your pregnancy was labeled as…

To the haunting consequences of your past actions.

“Are you sure this is normal?” Toji asks, seeing that your pain was not subsiding. “I think you need help—”

“No shit, Toji!” you gasp, he raises an eyebrow. “I mean—I’m sorry.”

“No need to apologize, princess. It’s nothing I’m not used to already.”

“… is that—is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“No. Not really.” He snickers, a smile that’s quickly wiped off his mouth when hearing you hiss. “But I’ve seen it work with others, so why not give it a shot?”

“I’m not—I’m not going to do that.” You huffed. “I—I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“But you’d ignore me?”

“If you’re here to scold me, this is not the right time.” You hiss again, feeling a sharp pain attack your lower back, making you press your lips and whine.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to do something? Bring you something to drink—or… something?”

“Yes, but—but it’s not like you can help me anyways.”  You confess, he frowns.

“What? Why? How hard is it to get something for you to take?” he scoffs.

“They don’t want me to—they say—they say it might hurt the baby.”

Toji blinks.

“And so, what? They’re just going to leave you to suffer?”

You don’t respond.

He sighs. Toji should’ve known better.

“Where does it hurt?”

“My—my back and stomach” you breathe, another sharp bolt of pain on those places precisely, making you hold his hand even tighter, once again, he’s surprised someone like you could even dent his skin. “And no matter what I do—nothing helps! Not even that stupid warm bath, or the massages Junko-san told me to do—”

The desperation for failed solutions after failed solutions is clear in your voice, a consistency that effectively shows your growing frustration at being reminded again and again that not even when carrying the future of the Zen’in, are you respected as a person.

It’s always the needs of others first, the beliefs of the rest—only this time around it was your baby, although through the twisted words of your in-laws.

“I’m so, so tired of feeling exhausted, I just want to—”

“Let me try.” Toji interrupts, offering a solution that initially catches you by surprise, a part of your mind urging you to decline and get away as far as possible, the dangers his closeness could give are far bigger than you’re willing to put up with—

Yet, another part of you is telling you to allow him, if only for a moment, to help you.

To enjoy his company, something you’ve been unjustifiably deprived of.

Something you should’ve had now more than ever due to your pregnancy, but for many painful reasons, you didn’t.

But just because you wanted it, does it mean you should?

…

…

…

It wouldn’t be the first time you succumbed to these desires.

Thus, the decision is made when freeing his hand and gesturing to him to proceed with a nod. Toji then places his hands over your shoulders, firmly pressing his fingertips against them before beginning to ease the tensions and stresses away from your body through circular motions.

Had you known of Toji’s talent, you would’ve asked for massages more than anything else from him—for the way he carefully worked over your knots, starting from your neck and shoulders, down to your spine and to your lower back… it was simply amazing.

And for a moment, it’s like you’ve forgotten the strained relationship you had with him in favor of wondering where he even learned to do something like that.

“Oh my god—” you sigh, shoulders relaxing as Toji continues to massage you. “This is so much better…”

“Well, know you can always count on me to make you feel better, right?” He teases, your satisfaction dwindles for a moment with a frown. “It’s just a joke.”

“It’s not the time for jokes.” You respond. “but at least my back doesn’t hurt anymore….”

“That’s the reason why you’re so tense— it’s because you can’t take a joke.” Toji adds, as if he were finding out how much he could push it before you snapped. So much for his concern… or perhaps it was his way to lighten up your mood?

“Yeah, how horrible of me—it’s not like I’m carrying a baby.” You chided, and once again, his arrogance is smacked out of him.

After a moment of silence and brief repentance, Toji speaks.

“How did Naoya take it?”

“…I don’t want to talk about that.”

It went bad. If not horrible.

Naoya was excited at first, over the moon to know that he was finally to be a father after all their attempts.

But when doubts began to plague his mind, eventually leading to the DNA test… his absence was the clear indication of his feelings.

However,  if his reaction hurt you and your marriage so badly, then why did you keep the—

“I always wanted a family.” You say, succumbing to one of the many questions you rightfully assumed Toji to have. “From the moment I married, no, even before that, I knew that’s what I wanted in life. To have a little girl, or boy, that I could endlessly dote and spoil on… And once I got with Naoya, realizing he too shared my dream, I literally felt it was only a matter of weeks before we’d have our own family.

But, when we began to try, and try, and try… what I once felt just by my fingertips was slowly transforming into an impossible dream.

People say that these things happen unexpectedly, just when you need them the most.

… and I wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt. Remain hopeful and believe that the gods had other plans for me in the meantime. But… the two of us knew it. There was something wrong, and we didn’t know what—

Or more like we didn’t want to know.

Naoya couldn’t even consider himself as the possible cause. And I… I also didn’t want to believe I was the obstacle between me and my dreams.

And then, you came along.

I guess it’s the weight of our actions that eventually made Naoya… hesitant for the baby.

We always knew that it was yours, it���s just that maybe… maybe we hoped it wasn’t. We so desperately wanted to believe the baby was his, ours, and not fruit of something we perhaps should’ve never done.”

Feeling both confused and slightly angered, Toji scowls.

“I can understand one thing—I was used. Fine, whatever. Nothing new. But the rest? If it was such a big issue your marriage, then why did you keep the baby? Surely Naoya considered getting an aborti—”

“Because I wanted to keep the baby.” You confess. “I was growing so desperate and lonely—to be married and yet be as isolated as I’ve never felt before, what was I supposed to do?! In a house full of people… do you even know how that feels?!”

“Like you wouldn’t imagine.”

Your eyes widen, and soon, a crushing wave of regret inundates your mind.

“I’m sorry.” You murmur, Toji sighs. “I didn’t mean to.”

“You’re just stressed.” He concludes. “Pregnancy stuff, I guess.”

“…I want my husband, here, with me.” You quietly admit. “I don’t want him to work anymore, spend days and weeks far away. But instead, he’s out there, angry with me and the baby…”

“He’ll come around.” Toji doesn’t know why he said that, only that he had to. You frown.

“How do you even know that? How do you know he won’t divorce me—or worse, cheat on me?”

“Do you hear yourself?” he scoffs, partially holding back his laughter. “Do you actually believe he’d be capable of cheating on you?”

A woman as special as you?

“Everyone else did at one point.” You remind him, he rolls his eyes. “Well, what else am I supposed to think after his absence?! He doesn’t even love me anymore for all I care!”

“That’s stupid.”

“Maybe for you it is.” You cry, tears begin to pool in your eyes. “It’s just a matter of time before he files for divorce and leaves me for someone else! Someone that can give him children of his own! Oh, I should’ve never allowed—"

“Naoya isn’t going to divorce you because I’ve seen how he treats you.” Toji interrupts, hurt by your blatant disregard of him, and yet, something about seeing you so distressed like this, heartbroken, makes him want to console you even more. “He could’ve divorced you the moment he saw the results, but he didn’t. Have you thought about that?”

“Perhaps he’s waiting for the right moment to humiliate me before his family—”

“Naoya loves you.” Toji says, and the words hurt him more than he anticipated. But… why? “I’ve known the kid since he was born—I’ve seen how he treats the people he doesn’t care about. And you’re nothing like that, not even close. So no, he won’t humiliate you.”

“And what makes you think that?”

Toji goes silent.

He’s acting as if he doesn’t know why he’s out here insisting so much on comforting you. And honestly? It made sense, for just a few hours ago he couldn’t care less any for a woman that played with two men and now had to pay the consequences—

But the truth wasn’t as cryptic as he liked to believe. All that he needed to do was dive a little deeper into his own thoughts and he’d soon find out why, as clear as day, he was fighting so hard to make you feel better.

And it all started the moment he accepted one crucial detail:

You were the mother of his child, his firstborn, and so… it unknowingly evoked a sense of protection towards you, deep underneath the layers of his disbelief and mockery…

Or more like further developed.

Since the first night the two spent together without Naoya, or perhaps even before, there was something brewing inside him, slowly, but surely. The first foundations of the feelings that would only flourish the night he had you alone, completely for himself.

In those moments of solitude, Toji liked to imagine that you were his wife; accompanying him underneath the covers, seeking his embrace, his touch, while telling him of your tedious day and how you so desperately looked forward to seeing him again—

And not Naoya.

The possibility of coming home to a warm bed, with a wife that treated him like an actual person, not a stain in the long history of the clan, contrary to the cold, empty room he has been condemned to since birth… is something he didn’t know he wanted, until you stumbled onto his path.

To be able to seek your figure whenever walking across the estate, hoping to catch you just around the corner, gossiping with your ladies about whatever it is that you liked to talk about with them, before you notice him by the corner of your eyes, lifting your gaze and seeing the lovely way your eyes would brighten at his presence—

A wide smile adorning your face, cheeks quickly turning red as you shyly dismiss your staff in favor of receiving him. Running to him to tightly embrace him, subsequently standing on your tip toes to land a kiss on his lips before murmuring the sweetest welcome home and tending to him.

And eventually… getting to hear your moving cries upon learning you’re expecting a baby. After many weeks of trying, both their efforts are finally met with the most beautiful reward life could give, letting your imagination run wild with all the things you wanted to do as a future mother—and yet, you’d still find a way to reassure him that he’d be a good dad.

That the disgrace of the Zen’in, the wretched man no one deemed respectable, less capable of harboring love, was still capable of being a good father. A caring husband.

…

But this was nothing but a silly desire of his, a response to the horrible things he’s endured.

…Perhaps if things had been different, had he been born as literally anyone else but himself… or maybe even met you under different circumstances, his life would’ve been completely different.

One with you, hopefully.

“Toji!” you suddenly gasp, startling him and concernedly looking at you.

“What is it now?” he frowns.

“The baby.” You say, which does nothing to ease his worries. “It’s—”

“It’s what? What’s happening??”

“The baby is kicking.” You reveal, swiftly taking his hand and placing it over your round stomach and onto the area you feel their kicks to be. “I can’t—I can’t believe it, look!”

“What do you mean they’re—”

Toji’s eyes widen.

A kick.

And another. And another one.

You weren’t lying, the baby was kicking.

And unbeknownst to him, this was their first time doing it too.

“Can you feel that?” you say, and all past worries were now replaced with excitement and overwhelming happiness for this special moment. “The baby is finally kicking!”

“I… can.” He demurs, trying his best to comprehend what was happening just beneath his palm, before noting the peculiarity of your sentence. “What do you mean finally?”

“It’s the first time he does it.” You reveal. “It’s supposed to happen around this time, but I didn’t know when, of course. I guess… now’s the day.”

“That means…”

Naoya didn’t get the privilege of feeling the baby’s first kicks.

No.

Not any baby.

His baby.

And now that this truth settled in his mind, it quickly became the sweetest moment he had ever experienced in his life. Something he wishes to preserve for all eternity…

Just after dealing with the enormous sense of guilt and shame settling in his heart.

For how could he ever consider bestowing the same fate as his to this innocent child, just to get a rise of the family that wronged him? Towards someone whom he hasn’t even met… simply because he couldn’t deal with his own emotions?

Just when did he turn so despicable? Embracing the kind of malice as his clan?

He should be ashamed to even be beside you.

“It’s a boy.” You say, abruptly cutting through his thoughts.

“Huh?”

“The baby—it’s a boy.” You repeat. “We’re having a boy.”

Toji doesn’t know why, nor thought it possible, but the news somehow makes him feel even happier.

“A boy.” He repeats. “A son.”

“We haven’t decided a name yet” you confess. “I was thinking something in honor of Naoya, continue the tradition like him and his father.”

“Why not something for you?” Toji suggests instead; his concern might be disguised in favor of your emotions (and partially, he was) but it was mainly the distaste of having Naoya’s, or technically Noabito’s, name anywhere near him.

But he wasn’t going to tell you that, obviously.

“After the way he’s acting, you deserve that much.”

You press your lips together before lightly chuckling, finding some truth behind his words.

“I guess so… but then, which name?” you ponder, frowning as you go deep into thought, yet nothing seems to arise for the occasion, certainly not when you’ve done nothing but consider names with the same kanji as your husband whenever touching the subject.

Thinking you needed more time to consider, or perhaps needing to admit there was nothing else you wanted but honor your husband, you accept defeat with a sigh.

“I don’t know, Toji. Maybe I should just name him after Nao—”

“Megumi.”

“What?”

“Megumi. Blessing.” Toji explains. “I thought it’d be fitting with what you told me.”

“That’s… very straight forward.” You say after a few seconds of quiet consideration, “Unusual, since it’s mostly used as a girl’s name, and I don’t know if the elders would approve—”

“Look, if it’s that much of a problem you don’t have to use—” Never one to happily accept rejection, Toji quickly feels both embarrassed and frustrated by you, which he does not hesitate to let you know.

Only to be surprised yet again.

“But also, very sweet.” You smile, briefly looking up to him before glancing back to your stomach and onto your hand resting on top of his.

He blinks, perplexed by your sudden admittance—and such, all he can do is stare at you while you keep pouring your heart out.

“Even with the things I had to endure to have him here… he’s still my blessing, and I wouldn’t want him any other way.”

At your declaration, Toji is pushed down onto another turmoil of emotions.

It shouldn’t be that hard to conclude this is something he should isolate himself from.

Remember that he isn’t part of this marriage, no matter if he had permission of the other two involved, or how much he tries to convince himself—Understand that his blood means nothing, both inside and outside the clan, and that’s how it’ll always be.

But when your hand gently squeezes his for a moment, thumbs caressing his knuckles as you let him know your pains are slowly disappearing and how grateful you are for his help—all his worries are quickly discarded, allowing him to once again imagine live out this faux reality a bit longer.  

A happiness that comes from the notion of being your husband, simply enjoying a quiet afternoon, the refreshing spring breeze, while sitting by the engawa, in front of your favorite garden, trying to make up for all the time he spent away from you.

Time Toji knew he should’ve spent either way by trying to get close to you, see your growth firsthand, check on you from time to time, assist whenever possible— instead of plotting a stupid plan to ensure your and the baby’s downfall.

He reproached himself for having fallen for such an arrogant trap, and convinced himself this was the way to go.

Yet, he didn’t allow that thought to interfere much with the present. He shouldn’t either way—not with the lovely bumps of his son’s kicking against his hand, almost as if he recognized it was his father finally acknowledging him…

And certainly not with your warmth reminding him of what could’ve been.

A moment he’ll preserve in his memories for the rest of his days, because while relishing in your company, he had already made up his mind.

One that fitted with the idea that all good things must come to an end.

Especially those that are simply not meant to be, less for someone as disgraceful as him.

It hurt him to come to this conclusion. To acknowledge what his mind, and existenceconstantly reminded him about.

But he knew he had to do it.

From that point forward, he’ll do everything in his power to keep away from you.

Toji would no longer watch you from afar, nor ask for your whereabouts, whether directly or indirectly.

He’ll simply limit himself to hearing of your wellbeing, or how your relationship began to flourish yet again, through rumors of the staff, if he was ever around the estate to acknowledge them.

He was right when he said Naoya would come along, you know? He might be wrong in some things, or most, but when it comes to judging other’s character, Toji never misses.

It was nothing but obvious that Naoya loved you very much, after all, if he no longer wanted to know anything from you, you wouldn’t have lasted as long as you did.

Naoya kept you at the estate, fed, warm, tended for, because he loved you—to the point of going against his own clan to provide you with the much-needed assistance you required for your oscillating pains.

With such gestures, it shouldn’t come to him as a surprise that you also loved Naoya very much.

And yet, it hurt him to realize such a thing.

But who was he trying to fool?

At the end, he had always knew he had no place in that marriage. No matter how much he tried to convince himself that the reason you kept returning to him was because you wanted something more from him—it was never the truth to begin with:

Your mind was always in Naoya’s wellbeing, and in his love.

He was ultimately a step towards your goals. Whether for pleasure, or for something deeper, it didn’t matter—they all went to the same target.

So, when he hears from the gossiping staff that you’ve named your child Megumi, he doesn’t get his hope ups anymore.

Instead, Toji simply takes it as what it is: a way to thank him for the blessing he’s given you, honor him one last time, before cutting ties with him forever.

Because the moment anyone catches wind of his relationship to your son… everything will collapse, and that is something he is no longer willing to allow.

Thus, he stays away. Keeps his distance from you and Naoya as both continue to tend for their growing family, giving Megumi things he had only dreamed of getting:

A warm, cozy bed to sleep in, where he’d be able to dream about all kinds of things he’d like to do when the following day arrives.

A roof over his head, guarding him from the cold pours of the rain, or the burning rays of the sun, as he watches the world go by.

Food to fill his stomach, every day, whenever and whatever he wanted, ensuring his healthy growth or an occasional craving.

A set future that would reassure him of any misgivings, permitting him to fail and not worry if he’ll have anyone to back him up, or start from zero.

But most importantly—

Love.

To remind him that no matter what happens, whatever he does or doesn’t do, he’ll always have a family to support him just the way he is.

…

…

…

Yeah.

It’s clear to him now.

It had always been better this way.

In other words, Toji disappears from your and Naoya's life to ensure your safety. Woaaah. I hope I was able to convey that kind of sad redemption (?)

Also, I was debating whether to actually name the baby Megumi or not, since it's a whole other character—but then I thought, why not? and thus this happened.

I guess we get to the conclusion that if there's one person that's most deprived (and in need) of love, it would be Toji. We all saw how he got after mamaguro died... so I think him doing an 180 to protect the mother of his child and son is 100% accurate and sad omg. jesus, how different from the Toji I portrayed in the previous oneshot.

Anyways, I hope it was to your liking :3 Thank you for sending in this ask, I really enjoyed writing it!

Take care, and hope to see you soon ❤️❤️

[ilylovelyz]

sunday morning

pair : levi x fem!reader

warning(s): major aot spoliers, pregnancy, children, timeskip!levi, just lots of love, reader is insecure abt her postpartum body, a little suggestive, mentions of church, reader and levi have a bit of an age gap (just like 3/4 years), reader is taller than levi by like 4/5 inches

note : i am just having baby fever T.T

the breeze feels good today.

it's a bright sunday morning. he never really liked sunday. he never understood the meaning of a "sunday morning." y'know, the ones where you go to church, go out to breakfast with your family, or just simply relax and sleep into the afternoon.

no, he never got that. instead, he had his sumday full of paperwork, training, or heavy cleaning. it's not like it was unexpected. he was a high-ranked soldier in the survey corps. he didn't expect anything from an already high-risk, practically 24/7 job.

so now, he feels... off. theres no paperwork to fill out. no training he needs to do. he can clean, but theres not much to clean anymore.

you could say he feels relieved. the titans are gone. everyone could finally relax without having the fear of their walls being blasted through. even better, he can relax with his wife, y/n.

he's still new to his "lifestyle." he's not used to this thing "relaxation." the windows are open, linen curtains flowing with the soft breeze. it's a good june day, neither too hot nor cold.

he's sweeping the already clean floors, wondering on what to do for the next few hours. he desperately wants to "relax" but he just doesn't know how. he sighs in distress, wiping the back of his palm on his forehead.

like clockwork, he hears the cry of a baby. his baby. setting aside the broom to stand on the nearest wall, he walks towards the nursery, painted in soft colors. he stands in the doorway for a few seconds, soaking in the lovely sight in front of him.

the baby was already soothed by his wife, who was already coddling and cooing at it with such love and adoration. "my, you have such cute fingers~" you whisper, fondling the baby's plushie fingers with your own.

"it's so bright," he thinks. today just seems so... perfect. he is still expecting something to terribly go wrong, somehow, someday. he inhales the scene in front of him, trying to burn the image into his memory forever.

you two have been together for many years, dating back to around the time when eren had finally sealed the holes in the walls. you and levi had been through a lot, and you've both seen a lot together. that in turn only made the bond between the two of you stronger and closer.

you remember the day he promised to marry you - when he was almost fatally wounded by the beast titan and had a moment of clarity did he decide that he wanted to be with you for the rest of his life. so, following the extermination of the titans, the two of you happily married.

it's astonishing how much time has passed since then, even though it's barely been a year. in that year, even despite your age (mid 30s), you fell pregnant following a few months of the wedding. you were absolutely joyful at the news. levi was too. although he didn't immediately lift you into his arms like every other "normal" guy would, his mind was racing a million thoughts per second.

on the outside, they were all sorta displeased at his lack of emotion. on the inside however, he thought his heart was going to explode due to how it felt so heavy with love, yearning, and relief. god, it was his dream to live a happy life, and now he finally has it (at the expense of his eye, fingers, and almost his entire ability to walk). he couldn't be any happier.

stepping out of his mind, he takes a few limpy steps towards you. you notice, turning around and giving him that loving smile of yours. "pretty day 'nnit?" you say. it wasn't much of a question. he replied with a soft hum, not taking his eyes off his firstborn, his son. it's crazy how much time has passed in a blink of an eye.

he remembers just as clear as day when you first told him you were carrying his child, and now his child is just a few measly weeks old. "lev, would you say he looks a lil' like you?" you tease. the baby was awake, little arms flailing and wiggling, reaching for nothing in particular.

he paid a little more attention to the baby. he was surprised at the sudden realization the resemblance the baby already has to him. black hair, little round blueish-gray eyes.. a stink face. "he's ugly like you." you tease. "how wonderful."

"yeah, luckily he'll grow up with great features." he resorts, a light smirk growing across his features. "if he grows up at all.." you giggle. he's a bit peeved that the baby looks like him, rather wishing he looked like his dashing mother instead. "i would rather he's like you though. i don't want him to be mistaken as a short asshole," he admits. "i mean, the brat isn't even half a year old and he already gives me looks."

you giggle at his comments. "i don't think he should be like me," you reply, getting up slowly and placing the now-sleepy baby into his bassinet. "i don't want him to look all nasty like me." you say, addressing your postpartum body.

even during your pregnancy, levi had noticed that you became obsessive with how your body had looked. he noticed the way you had negatively looked at yourself, and it just made him so angry at you. you looked absolutely lovely to him. "there's nothing wrong with your body, anyone who says so is an uneducated idiot with no common sense." he replied, bringing his hands to wrap around your waist.

"you're just saying that because you're biased." you sigh. "no, i'm saying that because it's true. i think you're the most beautiful woman i've ever seen, and you still are," he whispers, placing a chaste kiss onto your cheek. why would it be fair to judge you based on appearance? you love him even though he's missing like 3 fingers, face and body scared up. hell, he can barely walk anymore.

his hands squeeze at the plush skin there teasingly, earning a surprised and flustered reply of dismay from you. you tried to break away from his grasp, only for him to wrap his arms around you even tighter. bringing one hand down to grab your ass, he attaches his lips to your neck. "i love you." he whispers.

you sigh in relief as a reply. you hope you didn't wake the baby when he unexpectedly hoisted you up into his arms, carrying you into the shared bedroom you have with him.

it is a good sunday.

[wangxianficfinder]

In the mood for a Fic...

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1. hii for the next itmf do you have any recommendations for fics in which sizhui is wangxian biological son? any au or length is fine thx <3

you can have the best of me, baby by stiltonbasket (Not Rated, 9k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Pre-Relationship, Dual Cultivation, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Sunshot Campaign, Getting Together, a-yuan is wangxian’s baby, Happy Ending)

five years gone by quillifer (E, 14k, WangXian, Mpreg, a/b/o dynamics, Alpha WWX, Omega LWJ, Breakup/makeup, Miscommunication, Pregnant Sex, consent is king, soft sad and horny, Happy Ending, Bottom LWJ, Top WWX, Hurt/Comfort, Modern AU, Unplanned Pregnancy)

🧡 Many Lan babies Series by LuckyMoonly (Varied, 414k, WIP, WangXian, Story collection, Mpreg, Pregnant WWX only, Family Fluff, Found Family, Kid fics) has several where A-Yuan is Wangxian's biological son

Nothing but your heart by airinshaw (E, 21k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Implied Mpreg, First Time, Getting Together, Angst and Drama, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anal Sex, Whump, Breeding Kink)

Until The End by abCEE (M, 365k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, war changes people, resulting to OOC, no pinning, Established Relationship, Mpreg, Good Uncle LQR, a little grey LWJ, a bit of JC bashing from LWJ, BAMF JYL, 16 years of yearning, mainly CQL verse but has scenes from the novel as well, LSZ is WangXian's Child, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Canon Rewrite, Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts)

My Pride and My Prejudices by Erbyrose, TitanPandora (T, 122k, WangXian, ZhuiYi, Father-Son Relationship, Canon Compliant, Misunderstandings, Bonding Over Dead Parents, Character Study, Sizhui calling WWX Mom, Family Drama, Survivor Guilt, Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Mpreg, Suicide Attempt, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, Grief/Mourning, Major Character Injury, Male Lactation, but it's not sexual, REALLY LONG CHAPTERS, Attempt at Humor)

Transcendent by AkatsukiShin (M, 162k, wangxian, fantasy au, demons, half-demon WWX, pining WWX, mpreg, childhood memories, angst w happy ending, fluff, hurt/comfort, mystery, action/adventure)

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2. Hiiii! Lovely blog, you’re a godsend truly!! Anyways I was hoping that for the next itmf you’d rec some fics with identity shenanigans?

Like, it could be wwx in mxy’s body but only lwj knows so everyone else is all confused because ? Hanguanjun moved on form wwx? Impossible! Or maybe a fic where they mix it up a bit and it’s lwj that’s disguised or something like that! Basically a good old fashioned identity porn fic. Wangxian please! Thank you so muchhh

By Any Other Name by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 31k, Wangxian, Canon Divergence, Crossdressing, Misunderstandings, Identity Porn, Identity reveal)

🧡 a paper friend by soft_wanning (G, 4k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Fluff, Paperman!WWX, Identity Porn, Meet-Cute, Different First Meeting)

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3. Hi! This is my first time doing this, sorry ^^. Itmf lwj kind of repeating his parents story, by marrying wxx and hiding him in cloud recesses (before he dies) and maybe putting himself in seclusion? The more angst the better, but preferably one where lwj isn't toxic, just really really worried. Idk if i should ask for more or less specific things, but thanks either way! I feel like I've read every fanfic like this (I've found like, 3) and I crave blood and tears. Thanks for the opportunity ^^

it's a webcomic and it's still ongoing, but House of Gentians by Pakhnokh on tumblr is amazing

~*~

4. Hi! First of all I want to thank you for your hard work, I have found so many great fics through this blog. <3 And now I’m in a mood for a (preferably) established relationship wangxian fic where WWX is the one taking care of LWJ. Maybe some hurt/comfort and protective/possessive WWX? That would be my jam if any fics come to your mind~

hello my old heart, how have you been? by ravenditefairylights (M, 10k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Temporary Amnesia, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Fluff, Trauma, Unreliable Narrator, Pining, Hair Washing, Hair Brushing, Hair Braiding, Soft WangXian, A lot of prose, wangxian are MARRIED and they have a SON, LWJ Needs a Hug, Sleepy Cuddles)

~*~

5. Hi! I was hit with the unexplainable need for some fics with ghost WWX who's searching for something (a family member or he's connected to one of his things and people don't realize it maybe), like looking for one of his siblings or for A-Yuan or one of the Wens and just like haunting everyone everywhere (or just one place), I don't know if there's even fics like that, there should cause it's a good plot in my humble opinion lol. Thank you mods! @jiangclaritybell

scatter and sunder by silversshadow (T, 15k, XuanLi, WangXian, Temporary Character Death, Canon Divergence)

💖 Ghosts Shouldn't by ShanaStoryteller (Not rated, 15k, wangxian, canon divergence, grief/mourning, angst w happy ending)

asymptotic by chinxe (T, 26k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Slow Burn, Misunderstandings, Pining)

The Ghost of Lotus Pier by daiki (G, 3k, JL & WWX, JC & WWX, ghost WWX) Its ghost wwx but for me he is more guardian angel than ghost

~*~

6. If possible, could I also get fics with NMJ and NHS being involved in the płot or fics taking place in the Unclean Realm for one of the IITMFs? I dont wanna swamp you guys with request messages so I wanted to combine them, hope that is fine. (rest of ask in a FF)

1PB2PB3PB4 is a good author for NHS and NMJ-centric fics

~*~

7. Hello, I hope you're doing well. This request is for the IITMF.

Fic(s) where WWX is politically powerful in the cultivation world; but not as a sect leader. I mean

He's a sect heir;

Or a head disciple, but with power and authority of the same, not as how he was canon, with only responsibility but no authority.

Only canon era please.

Please only rec fics where he's a cultivator as I've read a few where he was a non-cultivator but politically powerful.

Thank you for your time 🌼🌼 @utxqia

All Things Belong by kuroi_atropos (M, 64k, WIP, WRH & WWX, WangXian, WWX is a Wēn, Abuse, Whipping, Manipulations, Warning: WRH, Smart WWX, Possessive Behavior, Warning: JGS, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Past Rape/Non-con)

Lynchpin by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 103k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Time Travel, Fix-It, Lynchpin [PODFIC] by Opalsong, [PODFIC] Lynchpin by Gwogobo)

~*~

8. Hello everyone can you recommend wangxian or quartet time travel fic

❤️ Tragedy is Not the End by Hobbsy3 (T, 358k, wangxian, Time Travel, Torture, Hurt/Comfort, Golden Core Reveal, Canon Divergence from Qiongqi Pass, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Yunmeng sibling bonding, good dad wwx, good dad lwj, JZX Lives, JYL Lives, Junior Quartet Dynamics)

does the requestor know about the time travel comp? that way I don't rec stuff on it already

How Much Love Has the Inch Long Grass by Vainwyrm (M, 12k, WIP, WangXian, ZhuiLingYi, XuanLi, Time Travel Fix-It, Permanent Injury, Disability, Canon Disabled Character, Physical Disability, Non-canon disabled character, Self-Worth Issues) if the requestor is okay with ‘triplet’ instead of ‘quartet’ then How Much Love Has the Inch Long Grass by Vainwyrm has a lot of interesting things going on in it for a time-travel AU

parent trap by tongzhi (T, 23k, JL & LJY & LSZ & OYZZ, wangxian, JYL/JZX, time travel, cloud recesses study arc, humor, matchmaking)

~*~

9. Do you know any fanfic where Lan Zhan is kind of rude to Wei Ying (or like, he rebukes all of WY's attempts to befriend him) only to end up regretting it when WY finally leaves him alone?

the earthquake in the room by phnelt (E, 39k, WangXian, College/University, Modern: No Powers, Canada, Getting Together, Mentions of lwj/others, inter-faculty romance, strangers to lovers to frenemies to lovers, mostly book characterisation)

Of Bunnies and Sleeves and All Happy Things by moonwaif (G, 3k, WangXian, two dorks, failed attempts at flirting, Lan Zhan is jealous, but he doesn't know it, unresolved romantic and sexual tension, Mutual Pining)

~*~

10. Hello! Idk if this is the way but I’m looking for fics where lz of the past time travels to the future and finds himself married to post canon wwx. I love those type of fics but I can’t seem to find them now :’(

An Arrow Through Time by syrus_jones (M, 166k, WIP, WangXian, Crack Treated Seriously, Time Travel, Reverse time travel, into the future, Potentially a Fix-it-fic?, Mistaken Identity, WWX is a Little Shit, POV LWJ, Angst, Gay Panic, Falling In Love Humor, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Canon Divergence, Post-Canon)

~*~

11. I’ve been playing “I say no” from heathers the musical on loop for a few Days now and now ITMF xiyao heathers-inspired? I hope someone knows one, thanks!

~*~

12. Hello! Itmf WWX being a badass swordsman? People being in awe of how well he fights: twining through enemies, sword flashing, people stopping in awe at his capabilities (like "oh, he isn't just a badass with talismans and dark energy, he was head disciple of Yunmeng Jiang for a reason!"). Thank you! (Bonus points: him wielding other cool weapons like daggers or a whip!)

A Glimpse of Past Glory by masked (T, 1k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Swordfighting, BAMF WWX)

~*~

13. Hi do you know any fics where Lan Xichen is called out for his hatred of Wwx because he thinks Wei Ying ruined both his and Wangji's life. Like it can be anyone calling him out, i just want to see him feel guilty about it.

When has silence saved anyone? by Vrishchika (T, 6k, WangXian, Post-Canon, LXC Critical, Gūsū Lán Sect, Not for LXC Fans, novel canon, Salt, Angry LWJ, Angry LSZ, Family Feels, WWX Protection Squad, LXC Gets Scolded, Based on Chapter 99 the Novel)

break by justdoityoufucker (T, 3k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, LXC Critical, JC Critical, Canonical Character Death, Guānyīn Temple Scene, BAMF WN, Protective WN)

💖After Truth Lies the Honest Path by Vrishchika (M, 10k, wangxian, canon divergence, truth serum, WIP)

aftereffect by justdoityoufucker (T, 3k, wangxian, LXC & LQR & LWJ, LWJ & LXC, post-canon, canon divergence, politics, LXC critical, JGY survives a bit longer)

Bitter Recompense by mondengel (M, 1k, LXC & LWJ, Angst)

Wasting Time, Asking Why by mondengel (Not Rated, 1k, LXC & LWJ, LXC & JGY, WangXian, Angst, Character Study)

~*~

14. ITMF for something really intense and intimate. Like the fic is written so well and intense the you get overwhelmed. Preferably canonverse, but i don't mind otherwise. Please let it really be intense and intimate. @whateverweilanlovechild

Damn I wish The Roots Grow Riotous was still on ao3 for #14. Really intense and strange but beautiful with a hopeful but not typical ending. I have it if op wants to try but mind the tags. Modern au. The Roots Grow Riotous by hansbekhart (E, 104k, wangxian, modern, fashion au, garment company, casual sex, group sex, implied/referenced cheating, switching, recreational drug use, angst w/ happy ending, single dad WWX, panic attacks, implied/referenced self-harm, grief/mourning, catharsis, body horror, floral horror)

Tempo Rubato by Spodumene (E, 107k, WangXian, Modern AU, Angst with a Happy Ending, Romance, persuasion au, Separations, Mutual Pining, Depression, Miscommunication, Emotional Roller Coaster, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Reconciliation, Eventual Smut, Jane Austen Fusion, Underage Kissing)

💖 love, in fire and blood by cicer (E, 360k, wangxian, immortal WWX, slow burn, pining, arranged marriages)

Vagabond by xantissa (E, 65k, WangXian, Slow Burn, Mystery, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Frottage, Case Fic, murders, Supernatural, Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending, extreme fluff, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, badass!LXC, top!LWJ, Bottom!LWJ)

i don't love you (but i always will) by sixstepsaway (E, 71k, WangXian, XianQing, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmate AU, wangxian endgame!!, handjobs, this ends wangxian and happy i promise, Angst with a Happy Ending, i had to give lwj an oc soulmate, Blanket Permission, Infidelity, Emotional Infidelity, Cheating, Pegging, Bottom!LWJ, top!WWX, Bottom!WWX, slight femdom!wq, Implied Consensual Somnophilia, Cockwarming, implications of consensual polyamory, undernegotiated polyamory, internalized ableism, Grief, Pining while fucking)

simple love | 簡單愛 by auberjing (E, 19k, WangXian, Modern AU, Hurt/Comfort, Slice of Life, Getting Together, Falling In Love, Strangers to Lovers, Caretaking, Angst and Feels, Grief/Mourning, Eventual Smut, Happy Ending, Hopeful Ending, Nude Photos, Nude Modeling)

lotus flowers rising from the dark mud by nu_breed (E, 122k, WIP, WangXian, WWX/Others, MingXian, LWJ/Others, JGS/LWJ, JGS/WWX, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Courtesan WWX, Courtesan LWJ, Pining while fucking, Palace Intrigue, Rape/Non-con Elements, Dubious Consent, Non-Consensual Sex Work, Top/Bottom Versatile WangXian, Minor Original Character(s), Light Dom/sub, Exhibitionism, Voyeurism, Light Bondage, Hurt/Comfort, Warprize WWX, Period Typical Attitudes, Values Dissonance)

The Murder of Crows by cerbykerby (M, 101k, wangxian, slow burn, pining, yiling wei sect au, fluff & angst, dark, romance, WIP)

Turn Left by kianspo (M, 186k, WIP, WangXian, NieLan, Canon Divergence, Fix-It of Sorts, Friends to Lovers, eventually, references to child sexual abuse, not main characters, Neurodivergent LWJ, Slow Build, Lán Family Feels, specifically, Twin Jades of Lán Feels, lwj-centric, Twin Jades of Lán Dynamics, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies)

If I Could Go Back in Time by Runningbarefoot (M, 122k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Role Reversal, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Grief/Mourning, YLLZ WWX, Eventual Happy Ending, The Twin Jade Brotherhood, Hurt/Comfort, Healing, Character Study, Twin Prides of Yúnmèng Dynamics, Slow Burn)

And I Will Call You Home by Spodumene (E, 42k, WangXian, Case Fic, Post-Canon, Getting Together, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Love Confessions, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood, Ghosts, Suicide, Explicit Sexual Content, Attempted Sexual Assault, LWJ whump, Original Character Death(s))

crossed the world with these empty hands by spookykingdomstarlight (E, 166k, WangXian, Modern AU, Artists, Non-Linear Narrative, POV LWJ, Established Relationship, Pre-Relationship, Getting Together, Demisexual WWX, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Happy Ending, Weddings, Separation Anxiety, Family Drama, Dysfunctional Family, Self-Worth Issues, Casual Sex, College/University, Temporary Long Distance Relationships, Relationship Pressures and Stresses, Insecurity)

The Vessel by Solmae (M, 54k, WIP, WangXian, XiCheng, Drama & Romance, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers)

A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 74k, WIP, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, musical cultivation, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, Happy Ending, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Worldbuilding, Módào Zǔshī & The Untamed Combination, No Yīn Iron, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Artist WWX, Musician WWX, Bad Parent JFM, Bad Parent YZY, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Parent-Child Relationship, Angry WWX, Angst, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Idiots in Love)

every love story is a ghost story by aisthuu (M, 59k, WangXian, Modern AU, Reincarnation, Character Turned Into a Ghost, Post-Canon, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Mixed Canon)

Alter by Solmae (E, 162k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Drama & Romance, Slow Burn, Rape/Non-con Elements, Gang Rape, Forced Prostitution, PTSD, Bottom LWJ, Top/Bottom Versatile | Switch WangXian, Explicit Sexual Content, Sexual Slavery, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Torture)

We can fix that by Spindoctor (E, 35k, WangXianJue, NMJ Lives, Arranged Marriage, Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Cock Warming, Caretaking, Light BDSM, Thigh jobs, Everyone Loves WWX, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Frottage, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Starvation, Starvation recovery, PTSD, PTSD RECOVERY, Suicidal Ideation, Scars, Discussion of Surgery,mild body horror, discussion of starvation, body talk, cnc fantasies, Light Bondage, tender fucking, Slow Burn, JYL Lives, BAMF JYL, Erectile Dysfunction, Weight Gain, Chapter Specific Tags in Beginning Notes)

Something at the Door by Pip (Moirail) (E, 50k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, Modern Cultivation, Intrusive Thoughts, Horror, Suicidal Thoughts, Temporary Character Death, Blood, Explicit Sexual Content, Mutual Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mystery, Urban Fantasy)

爱不释手; never let me go by yiqie (E, 68k, WangXian, Case Fic, Blood and Injury, Demons, Body Horror)

a small change Series by celialoveslwj (T, 92k, JC & WWX, Background WangXian, JC Centric, Angst, Sickfic, yunmeng trio, Canon Divergence, Break-off before Qiongqi Path incident, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Dealing with sickness, Golden Core Transfer Failure?, Bittersweet Ending, BAMF JYL, Hurt/Comfort, PTSD, Grief/Mourning, Fix-It of Sorts)

~*~

15. Do you guys have a rec list for outsider point of view stories? People reacting to the nonsense WangXian get up to is always great fun!

My chain hits my chest/When I'm bangin' on the radio by x_los (T, 2k, wangxian, modern w/ magic, case fic, competence kink, YLLZ WWX)

boom clap the sound of—Public Displays of Affection by Whispering_Sumire (E, 13k, wangxian, modern, reincarnation au, temporary character death, heartfelt conversations, crack treated seriously, outsider pov, accidental voyeurism, scheming NHS, redemption, angst & feels, family drama, panic attacks, hugging, crying, love, grief/mourning, hopeful ending)

❤️ Attempting the Impossible by Ariaste for williedustice (T, 36k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Post-Canon, Yunmeng Bros Reconciliation, Adoption, Family Fluff, Kid fic, Family drama, Fluff, [PODFIC] Attempting the Impossible by Ariaste by lunatique)

Six in one hand by deliciousblizzardshark (T, 2k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Modern: No Powers, Crack Treated Seriously, Compulsory Heterosexuality, POV JC)

~*~

16. hey do you by any chance know ff where lwj is injured and wei ying gets in his protective husband mode? angst and gore would be preferred

silk threads and precious metal by Sevidri (M, 4k, WangXian, Canon-Typical Violence, Sunshot Campaign, Whump, Blood and Injury, WWX' Canonical Vengeful Streak, LWJ Makes A Beautiful Damsel in Distress, Non-Consensual Ribbon Touching, Protective wwx, Hurt LWJ)

~*~

17. Hi!! I'm in the mood for a fic where jgy is put through torture (preferably at the hands of jgs or jin-furen and preferably psycological) and tossed to either nmj or lxc (or both). @halfwizardprincess

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[vixendoesstuff]

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

ALRIGHT, SO-

World Tour, where (please excuse my language) shit hits the fan, for real. My notes on this saga is hectic and convoluted, so I'll try to make some sense of it for this post. If you have any questions, feel free to ask in the askbox or my DM's, whichever you prefer.

I wanted to do bullet points for this, but maybe most Tumblr users prefer to read long paragraphs than bullet points, since my posts not having bullet points do better? IDK, I've only been on Tumblr for like, a year at best so forgive this soul for her cluelessness lol.

And also, depending on how much I've typed, I might have to split this saga into three parts, 'cause I know y'all don't actually want to read a really long post that took up three scrolls wide lol.

Anyway--let's start this crazy train.

So, the story begins the same way as it is in the movie--opening shot with Cloud Guy giving a quick recap about the first movie, and then the next shot panning towards the Techno Trolls (ay, Branch's tribe, let's go!). Unfortunately, the amount of screentime (or appearance in this case) they got here minimal, since we're focusing on Branch and co.

But anyway, same thing happened, King Trollex hosting the rave, Barb barges in demanding his string and destroyed Techno Reef to get him to comply, same old. Poor guy, honestly, he just wanted to vibe.

Next shot pans to Pop Village, same thing there. Everyone is smiling and singing and dancing (with Techno!Branch joining in, look at that! Since he can't extend his hair like everyone else, he relies on acrobatics and just generally hang onto someone ((mostly Poppy)) whenever they swing on the trees with their hair). Branch tries to confess his love to Poppy, but got friendzoned unintentionally by her (ouch). Then Barb's bat pet thing comes in, and King Peppy's history lesson.

They're not the only ones here in this world. There are other trolls out there; Pop, Hard Rock, Classical, Country, Funk, and Techno.

This is where it gets interesting. At this point in time, Branch has all but accepted that he's possibly the only Troll in the village that looks the way he does. That he's the only one that ever existed in the world. It's why he and Cooper has a sort of closer bond with eachother in this AU : different Troll (tribe, but not that they knew this yet) solidarity. Sure, he was curious once, like how come is egg was in the Troll Tree, why does he look different, ect. But now he's more than content with his current predicament. He has friends now, something to look foward to; he was happy, after so long.

But now with the news that there are other Trolls out there, different from the rest, his past yearning came back to life. And while King Peppy hadn't said it outright, his lack of words all but confirmed Branch's suspicions. That he's not the only one out there. And from what he saw in the scrapbook, he can pinpoint which one of the tribes he supposedly belongs to; Techno.

Then we cut to when Poppy packs up to leave and got caught by Branch. The same argument happens, with the addition of Poppy saying that because there are different Trolls out there, then shouldn't Branch be curious about them? Who knows, maybe there's a tribe that looks exactly like him! Branch refuted by saying that, even if there was a tribe just for him, how would he connect to them? He's been living as a "Pop Troll" his whole life, what connection can he form with these hypothetical Trolls (identity issues go brrr)? What if they found out that he's gone Grey for almost all his life? If the Pop Trolls, who has known him since he was born, didn't react well to his whole Grey-ness; what are the chances his own kind would react badly to the news? Or worse, reject him outright.

Before he could go on, boom! Cooper appears from the shadows and said something like, "That's not how you really think, ain't it Branch?". They were surprised he's there, and then they exchange some more dialouge sort of expressing Branch's concern about not fitting in with his hypothetical tribe out there, and shed some light on Coopers concern as well about wanting to find you who you really, and even if you don't fit in atleast you know the truth now, that sort of stuff. IDK, I'm not great at writing angst, lol.

Anyway, after some convincing from Poppy, Branch relented and decides to accompany her (even if he denies it, he wants to know if his people is out there). Cooper also wants to come along, and while Branch refuses for his own safety, Poppy allows it in the condition that he sticks with them at all times. So, the three sets of to explore the entire Troll Kingdom, to "reunite" all the tribes and make one big party at Queen Barb's World Tour.

Little did they know just what kinds of trouble they'll encounter on their journey.

Woah, plot twist, Cooper actually comes along instead of going on a solo journey this time around! He replaces Biggie in this! What a shocker! Shocked emoji!

Admitedly, while it's funny the first time, Cooper's solo adventure is... I don't wanna be too rude about it, but it's sort of unnecessary in the big run? I mean, not entirely unnecessary, but like, if you remove that and just have him go along with Poppy and co., nothing major would change. He'd still be reunited with his family in Vibe City, except this time he'll have a first time reaction to the history of the Strings and see the truth of it, y'know what I mean?

But anyway, Poppy, Branch and Cooper's gonna explore the world of other genres. I don't think much will change with his inclusion, but the reactions will be far more varied, me thinks. Stay tuned for the next part, 'cause wow did not expect this part of the series to be so convoluted lol.

Also I had wanted to include some scene redraws from the movie with new implemented elements for this AU, but artblock is gripping me tight and college is starting soon, so I won't have much time to draw than I do write. So, yeah, hope y'all don't mind lol. I'll definitely do some artwork for this AU in the future though, believe it!

Until next time!

[geralts-yenn]

2023 character wrapped

@deandoesthingstome knows too well I get a little obsessive over some characters - let's see if I can make it to nine (or if I can stop at nine 😁 a look onto my masterlist that's barely a year old tells me we will get there)

Here we go...

My no 1: No surprise here - Mikey

He's my precious silly boy and I will never stop loving him. As part of a family of lunatics here or here, as our best friend, or as the cute neighbor who steals the heart of Nina and Mel

2. Melot

I blame @raccoon-eyed-rebel for introducing me to the slutty lil' braid boy. Just look at that grumpy, miserable little guy. I can't help but thinking about how to make him feel better. That's why he gets the love from not only one but two lovely persons in my Hearts Too Big universe. He's still not quite happy as a vampire in Believe in Me, but I swear we'll get to it.

3. Syverson

Not much of a surprise - how could I not love him? He's the character I read the most this year, for sure. But I also loved to write him into my bonfire story and it's follow up. I was yearning for him and I imagined him as a daddy 🥰

4. Evan

Oh, he was a surprise for me. Even though I liked his character in the movie, I didn't intend to write for him. Until a lovely nonnie put him into my brain and started to fuel my obsession with him here, here and here.

5. Walter

The grumpy bear was always a favorite of me when it came to reading but I was a little scared to write him by myself. In the end, I'm quite happy with the outcome when I finally dared.

6. August Walker

Another one that I love but didn't dare to write. Until it was too tempting to add him as the vampire king in Believe in Me. And then those little pieces of smut here and here with the vampire king were surprisingly easy to write.

7. Napoleon Solo

I love the smooth spy. I had so much fun to pair him up with the lovely Amina and I totally plan to get back to Leon sometime in the future

8. Charles

I wish I had more time to explore his character. I love him so much - especially when he's put into a modern AU. I kinda did this to him as my sidekick for Melot. And I have a wip in my folders, sleeping for way too long, where he's the most annoying and yet adorable duke. I really hope I get to the point where I can introduce him to you.

That's everyone I have written for this year. But I surely don't stop here with obsessing

I won't count Geralt, Will and all the other characters of Henry Cavill because this post is already too long for anyone to read, lol.

But I surely have to count the man himself

9. Henry Cavill

Yes, I am obsessed with this man and I am not sorry! I guess I won't ever get back to the unfinished RPF that got me into writing at all but I will not stop loving the adorkable man that he is.

And then there are still some guys that don't look like Henry:

9. Dean Winchester

I had almost forgotten how much I loved him. Until I introduced the teenager to Supernatural and spent a lot of evenings this year watching that stupid little shit 😍

10. Billy Russo

One of my favorite roles for Ben. And so many good fics out there that I need to explore at some point.

11. Jack Reacher

Very recent addition to the hunks in my head. I love the new season and I'm definitely not immune to that man's visual charms.

I think I will stop here, even if I could name probably another 12...

@ellethespaceunicorn @peyton--warren @gummydummy19 @jvanilly @ronearoundblindly @ylva-syverson want to talk about your favorite characters?

[m-u-g-i]

Only You

Modern Day Sukuna X Plus-Size Female Reader

Mini Gift For: @plussizeficchick

(That's why I asked for your favorite characters. I wanted make a little something for you 🥰)

Masterlist | Part 2 | Part 3

Genre: Angst (?) to Fluff

Summary: As college attendees, both of Sukuna and you met each other by chance. However, the man holds a reputation from his tendency of having an inconsiderate and aggressive attitude towards others, though they were mainly rumors and misunderstandings. Being misunderstood tends to leave people emotionally unavailable yet after one fluffy encounter, his perspective of life changed drastically and he debates whether he's deserving of such happiness.

NOTE: The following consists of sexual assault, mentions of abuse, slght violence, vulgar language, and possible mental health problems. Please keep in mind this is all for entertainment purposes and the circumstances of the following are purely fiction. The author refuses liability of any offense, so please feel free to exit if you're sensitive towards any of the said topics.

Author's P.O.V.

"Oh my gosh, it's him. Go the other way"

"Why the hell are you breaking with me, you d**che?!"

"Jokes on you, I was only using you for money."

Constant comments that haunt the poor man's ears on the daily.

~~~~~~~~~~

Ryomen Sukuna, the campus' well-known playboy who's incompatible of emotion or loyalty. With an RBF as his usual expression, the icy persona he radiates didn't really come off as a surprise. He's dated a plethora of women and yet they all fell through, though the relationships' foundations were incredibly shallow and one-sided (money, clout, sex, etc.). Thine poor soul had built an unhealthy immunity to hatred, negative impressions, and being used. Rumors circulated throughout campus, mainly consisting of toxicity, abuse, rape, so on and so forth, although he was never at fault for the false accusations and mistreatment bestowed upon him. Yet, this man was too immune to it to care. Being misunderstand proves that there is so much than what meets the eye.

By fate, he bumped into little ole you.

He met you as you hurriedly rushed out of the library, causing an accidental collision with your notebooks and his canned drink. Though apologies were sung and accepted left and right, compensation was made by a simple out-going at the college café. Awkwardness emerged through every cell on his body as he was afraid of the possible reactions and behavior you would have towards him. However, you were just a simple and dare he add, warm soul who was out with a new acquaintance.

Who knew such a simple act of kindness would stick with Sukuna's supposedly cold heart.

The time following the simple out-going resulted into frequent meetings and occasionally, study sessions. Despite his age being a year older, your assistance in such resulted in great improvement in his academics--more like mental health to be honest. Honestly, it left him baffled at the admirable intelligence installed in your brain--or he must be incredibly stupid. Everyone began to pity you, concerned of the potential heartache or abuse you may go through as your bond with the supposedly "playboy" began to tighten. Yet, it remained invalid and irrelevant in your mind and heart.

Months flew quickly as emotions began to evolve in the heart of the two of you, however, one heart remains doubtful and hesitant, creating fear inside of him for the first time in a while. He was already content with your friendship with him yet he can't help but yearn for more. How could he not when such a thick, curvaceous queen with such a beautiful soul would take time out of her day to spend it with to help him study or maybe for occasional hang-outs? Everything was almost surreal, but the continuation of such remains unknown.

~~~~~

Once the second course of the day ended, Sukuna strolled through the campus with his clique on their way to get some lunch from a few restaurants and food stands. With trays upon trays, bags on bags, the group searched for a suitable and comfortable location to find. Finally finding an area to sit after about few minutes of searching, the group of men sat on a picnic table located outside of the same café you treated Sukuna to to compensate for the incident that occurred during your first encounter. It wasn't long until the food began to disappear one by one and useless conversations were created.

"Yeah, bro. She's fine as hell, but she's dating Kotaro from the rugby team. Ugh, that bastard," a male with pure white hair complained.

"Maybe I can still get her to my room tonight. I never fail to do so."

"You're a whore, you know that?" Said another male with luscious, black hair, longer than most people's will to live.

"Do you know how many relationships you've ruined because you couldn't keep it in your pants?"

"Hey, I only offer myself. Those chicks are the ones that end up taking the opportunity. That's on them," the white-hair defended.

"Telling them that you can do them better than their man is not offering. It's called "no self-control", Satoru," the long-haired stated.

"C'mon, Suguru. I have plenty of self-control."

"Then, I bet $100 you won't be able to go 1 month without sex," Suguru implied.

The absurd conversation continued on as Sukuna leaned his head in his hand, visibly bored from his current situation. Scanning the atmosphere around while dining an onigiri, his eyes fell upon the scene through the window of the nearby café. With no ill intention, his eyes began to doze off until they coincidentally fell on your plump figure that happened to be inside.

Analyzing thoroughly, he couldn't resist the urge to admire your appearance. Straightened hair pushed lazily yet attractively to one side with an oversized hoodie in a pastel color and gray sweatpants with socks and slides. Round glasses sat adorably on your squishy face as your attention remained on your notebooks and laptop. On the side of the device had a small drink as well, creating a very aesthetic atmosphere.

Similarly, your eyes finally leave the objects in front of you, peering around to take a breath and recollect yourself from your distressing thoughts, only to coincidentally catch Sukuna's gaze. Slightly surprised, you sweetly smile, waving gracefully yet shyly at him, causing the male to sit upright, slightly tense, as a light blush approached his cheeks while he waves similarly in response. You giggle at his state, but decide to resume back to your studies with your mood slightly lightened.

He, on the other hand, remained attentive on you. Almost in a trance, he couldn't find the strength to look away. His head rested on his hand once more, feeling at peace despite the constant beating of his chest. That was until...

"Oh, what do we have here?" Satoru seductively says, causing the pink hair to snap out of his trance.

"W-What?"

"I think our little Ryomen-chan has found his next target."

Sukuna snarled at the comment, despising the insulting diction spewing from Satoru's disgusting hole called his mouth. He rolled his eyes as the other male began to speak.

"Now, now, Satoru. From the looks of it, it seems that Ryomen has finally found out what love is," Suguru defended.

Though the term was very foreign, Sukuna found comfort and relief from it. His heart rate increased rapidly with no chance of calming down. Satoru immediately scoffed in disbelief.

"Love, schmove. We all know one he gets his hands on her, she'll be kicked to the curb within the next minute," the white hair mentioned.

"I don't know about that. By the way he was looking at her, I would say our friend here is quite intrigued. He basically had heart eyes," Suguru teased.

Before further bickering could occur, Sukuna was startled by a gentle tap on his shoulder. He turns to find you standing there, backpack on, your phone and notebook in hand and with the most beautiful smile he's ever seen. The way your cheeks plump up, creating crescents with your eyes, how your dimples dented deeply into your cheeks displaying the genuine emotion when greeting him, he felt his knees go weak.

"Hi, Sukuna-senpai," you greet. "Hello, Gojo and Geto-senpai."

You greet them all with a bow with them responding back, though Satoru seemed quite agitated from the previous conversation.

"I came to drop this off to you."

Gently, you placed his phone on the table in front of him. Shock overcame as he recalled missing his phone, but believed he forgot it at home.

"H-How--?"

"Yesterday, after our study session, you forgot it at the library and I don't know where you live, so I held on to it for the time being. Plus, I couldn't find you earlier during down time, so I thought it'd be best to try during lunch."

"Wow. T-Thanks. I appreciate it," he says with a blush.

Before you could even return his gratitude out of courtesy, you were rudely interrupted.

"Oh, please. Forgetting at the library? Couldn't find him? Bullsh*t. Did you go through his phone or something? C'mon, be honest," a feminine voice interfered.

Suguru, along with yourself, turn your heads to see a woman while Sukuna and Satoru, on the other hand, growled in clear annoyance, able to recognize that sultry yet irritating voice.

There stood Kanjuro Mizuki, Sukuna's most persistent and most toxic ex.

She's in the same grade level as you, therefore, she's younger than all three men present. However, due to her high stature and wealthy upbringing, she always got what she wanted. But, she never knew how to play nice or let things go and if the issue was addressed with her present, she'd make your life a living hell, even if it was her partner.

You could say Sukuna's reputation rotted unnecessarily because of her, shortly after they broke up since she cheated on him for the umpteenth time, yet she had the audacity to accuse him of being the toxic and abusive one. The chick even made a whole scene in the hallway, in class, and on her social media with tears, acting skills, and a bruising makeup kit.

People all over began to despise Sukuna more than you could believe. He could've denied it, especially since there was no legitimate evidence claiming he did or he didn't commit such crimes, but he knew there was no use since everyone was so strong in believing his ex, so he allowed the public to portray him as such, though the constant bruising on his body proved otherwise.

"What do you want, Mizuki?" Sukuna asked with irritation audible in his tone.

"Well, Ryo-cha--"

"Don't. Ever. Call. Me. That."

She grumbled, but refused to allow her pride to be wounded.

"Fine. Anyways, are you sure this fat b*tch isn't trying to stalk you? I've seen desperation before, but this takes the cake," she remarks.

"Look, who's talking, b*tch," Satoru mumbled.

"Come again," she snapped at the white hair.

"I said what I said, hoe."

"You wanna go, Satoru?"

The said male stood up, about to throw some hands, but Sukuna placed his hand on the former's chest, shaking his head, telepathically messaging the white haired male to calm down before he falls into the woman's hands.

With clenched fists and gritted teeth, Satoru sat back down in defeat, scoffing, before crossing his arms to sulk similarly to a child.

Mizuki giggles mischievously.

"Hmm, thought so. Anyway, I understand why you'd be into a twerp such as Ryo-chan, but new flash, hon. This?"

She motions her hands up and down, scanning your body with disgust plastered on her face.

"This ain't it, babe," she chuckles.

The woman struts herself in front of the seated male, lowering her back to meet his gaze. If your eyes didn't deceive you, you'd say Sukuna seemed shaky and nervous as he struggled to confidently confront the woman before him.

"Leave her out of this, Mizuki," Sukuna butted in.

The woman dies laughing.

"C'mon, even if she was your type, you'd probably use her like the rest of them did. Or maybe the other way, I don't know what's in that f*cked mind of yours. In fact, I don't even understand why either of you would be interested in each other," she states with an amused cackle.

Her hands inconsiderately begin an assault around his body, especially his groin. Her eyes spewed venom and twisted intentions as the male whimpered under her touch. He tensed in, what resembled, fear as she continued her harassment. She lightly giggles at his reactions until the action resulted into harsh grips on her wrists. Mizuki met eyes with Sukuna, startled at the sudden contact.

His gaze burned into her souls, seeping hatred and disgust for the woman sitting on him. It didn't take a genius to see "anger" was an understatement of the wrath Sukuna was close to unleash on this woman. Yet, it was easily wavered by a smirk that crept upon her face.

"F*ck off, Mizuki," Sukuna snarled, attempting to seem unbothered by her presence.

With her smirk remaining, she yanked both limbs out of his grip and caressing his face, but he flinched horribly. Her smirk transformed into a wicked grin, indicating that she was getting off to this.

Satoru and Suguru shifted forward as they immediately were about to handle the situation, but they glanced to you for a moment and they swore Satan himself possessed your body as your completely shifted.

Your fluffy, soft exterior began to harden as your wrath was soon to be unleashed on this woman that was assaulting your dear senior. Analyzing your glare at the woman, they glanced at each other, nodding, agreeing that it'd be best--and more entertaining--to have you handle this.

"Oh, no. Did I huwt Ryo-chan's feewings? Aw. How precious," she mocks.

She then yanks his hair from the back of his head, snapping his head up. With a yelp, Sukuna's breathing became ragged as he couldn't deny the fear swarming his body at that instant.

"You know I'm right. Need I remind you I was the only one who stayed with you all this time, Ryomen. I never left you unsatisfied in bed, I always made sure that you were well taken care of, I made sure you were happy and most of all, I was the only one who ever loved a pig like you. Everyone else? You threw them aside as if they were used toys or vice versa. Admit it."

She sits on his lap placing her fingertips underneath his chin, causing him to meet her smug gaze.

"You need me," she whispered.

Without anyone noticing, you sat your belongings on the side of the table and began to tie up your hair in a lazy bun. You gently place your glasses away as you rolled up your hoodie sleeves.

The pure evil in her eyes demanded dominance as it steered itself deeply into his soul, causing him to tremble. His breath began to quicken in panic, tears brimmed the edges of his eyes as fear was no longer resembled, but present in his expression. The woman laughed at the pathetic, submissive response from the male. He clenched his fists harshly, but before he could do something he would regret, you swiftly gripped her arm immediately pulling her away from him, having her face you.

"What the--?"

Slap.

The impact on her cheek made such a satisfying and clean sound, increasing the level of sadism that was yet to be released. She yelps pitifully as she was literally flown across the concrete. Frozen and stunned, she glares at you while your expression became dull and blank.

"Mizuki-san, you do understand what personal boundaries are, right?"

Your tone dripped in sweet sarcasm, almost in a whisper which contrasted from the intense aura radiating from your body. Even the three males were astounded by this new persona.

Mizuki cackles, refusing to seem weak in public, especially in front of Sukuna.

"Honey, please. You're really defending a pig like him? Well, then again, animals do tend to protect their own kind," she comebacks with a smirk.

Expectant of an outburst, instead Mizuki was given a laugh from the woman in front of her.

"Well, pigs do tend to go for trash until they find decent food. I mean, Sukuna-senpai did end up dating you," you growled.

The three seniors beside you pursed their lips in resistance of bursting out laughing, though the white haired male was more dramatic with it.

Visibly embarrassed, anger riled up Mizuki's adrenaline, so she stormed up to you in attempt to hit you.

"You f*cking b--"

"Ah, ah, ah. Trash don't talk, do they?"

You push her away from the table once more, causing her to stumble a bit. Bit by bit, you slowly began to lose rationality and your morals of remaining non-violent no longer existed within you, at the moment. The female recollects herself as her suppressed fury no longer remained oppressed.

"You brat! Why is your fat*ss so persistent anyways?! Is money your motive?! Huh?! Fame or sex?! Not like you'd get far looking like that, sl*t!" She exclaims, attracting unnecessary attention around campus.

"Last time I checked, you opened your legs more than your books these past few years. Last time I checked, you lost all that damn weight by wiping off that make-up and gained it all back with plastic surgery. Seriously, sis, them tits ain't fooling nobody."

The crowd around the area began to murmur within themselves as a few chuckles and laughs were heard as well. Attention increased as the campus became intrigued seeing the campus' spoiled brat was finally being told off. Seeing such a result caused anxiety to conjure within the woman before you.

"W-Well, you're not the special either, b-b*tch!"

"Did I say I was? You were the one who wanted to start something since you obviously thought you were all high and mighty, right? So, come on. You talk so big when you assault a man, how come you're not fighting back to another woman? Huh? I know why," you comment.

You kick her leg, tripping her, having her fall face flat on the concrete. Bending down, you yank her hair, forcefully having her meet your deadly glare.

"You're just weak."

You gave her a nice uppercut, earning a shriek from her. "Oh's" and "Ah's" could be heard from the crowd as a few laughs were heard as well. You towered over her, remaining blank and lifeless in your expression.

"You knew he wouldn't hit you back, that's why you talk a big game. But, I don't mess with that," you say with such malice.

She screeches in desperation as she stands up and goes towards your direction. Offended, she attempted to slap you, but instead, you took ahold of her wrist and twisted it in an instant, but not harsh enough to break anything, though you did want to hear a refreshing crunch of bones before a satisfying scream of agony.

You were quick to punch her to the floor with your free arm, almost knocking her out. Her nose began to bleed as she sat up in panic of the redness flowing down. Backing up, fearful of another blow, which was coming her way regardless, you make one last right hook before grabbing her collar, lifting her effortlessly off the ground.

"Touch him again and this little piggy will pork chop you into next week, you heard?"

You drop her on the floor, coldly walking away with your back facing her, but you freeze.

"And make sure to tell your dad I said, 'Thanks'. He sure left this pig squealing last night," you wink.

The crowd gave diverse reactions as a portion laughed and squealed in amusement, exactly to Satoru, another portion had a share of whispers and smirks, similar to Suguru, and the remainder became speechless, comparable to Sukuna.

You shrug nonchalantly as you returned back to the three males who sat there shocked of the kind responses you spat towards Mizuki's snarky remarks. Ignorant of her humiliated stature, you began to gather your belongings as she stood up and just scoffed in pain and embarrassment, storming off shouldering a few people along the way.

Once she left, the three men laid their eyes on you as they remained tense and dumbfounded by the scene that had unfolded. With a sigh, you wore your backpack once more before retrieving your glasses and tilted your glasses up on your nose bridge in a comfortable position. You took ahold of your phone and other belongings as well, dusting yourself off and readjusting your clothes and stature. Even your hair was brought out of the bun into the luscious form it was in moments before Mizuki came.

You shyly grin in embarrassment, seeing the amount of attention and unnecessary action you caused.

"Sorry for that. I didn't mean to interfere in your personal life, Sukuna-senpai. I just didn't like how she was treating you. H-Hehe," you nervously chuckle.

Their amazed expressions remained, almost as if they were deaf of the words you spoke.

"Marry me," Satoru spouted.

You almost jumped at the proposal, but giggled nervously.

"Uhh, senpai? I-I think you misspoke."

"No, I didn-- Ow!"

The male was quickly silenced by a harsh hit on his head made done by the very male you defended.

"Shut up, bastard! She's mi--"

Sukuna froze in his place, just realizing the words he was about to release. He turned to you afraid of your reaction, in case you were able to resemble the sentence he lacked to finish. He found you holding your mouth with shoulders bouncing, indicating you were resisting your laughter. Instead of embarrassment, his heart melted at the sight in content.

"Gojo-senpai, you're as mischievous as ever," you state with a laugh.

Subconsciously, Sukuna fondly smiled at your adorable guffaw as the other two watched in awe, seeing their supposedly cold-hearted comrade soften for a soul such as yours.

"Say, Y/N-san. Come sit with us, we just got some kikufuku, onigiri, ramen, and some other foods. We can't finish this all by ourselves," Suguru offered.

"Yes, we ca-- Yah!"

The white haired yelped in pain once more as a portion of the flesh of his thigh was twisted painfully by the male who made the kind offer towards you.

"I-It's alright. I don't want to stir more trouble for you guys. I probably made things worse."

"No!" Sukuna outbursted, catching all of you off guard.

"U-Uh, I mean, w-we weren't asking, you know? And you won't cause trouble. You actually helped u-us out a lot s-so, just eat with us, Y-Y/N. Let us treat you. It's no different w-when we're studying, r-right?" Sukuna stutters as his cheek flush into a darker shade of pink with every word spoken.

Contrasting from the two males smirking at Sukuna's shy statement, heat quickly rose to your own cheeks as you smiled dearly before nodding, taking up his offer. Hectic, he scoots over to give you room as you sat next to him. Satoru and Suguru sit smugly in their seats, enjoying the sight of their friend sitting tense and blushing by the woman next to him.

Various topics of conversation evolved left and right, keeping you occupied until you turn your head to notice the tense stance of the man next to you. His leg bounces and his fingers fidget, clear signs of anxiety, creating concern within you. The two others continued their own personal conversation as you gently place your hand upon his, causing to freeze and tense up more than before. Sweat trickled down his forehead as he turned to you, seeing your eyebrows furrowed in worry.

"Are you alright? Am I making you uncomfortable? I can leave if you need me to," you gently offer, almost in a whisper.

Too entranced by your consideration, neither of you realized the two pairs of eyes peering at the scene playing before them. Once making eye contact with you, his body soon relaxed into a slight smile as he held your hand in response.

"I'm alright, just a bit tired from today's events," he admits.

You sigh and smile, relieved. Almost about to retrieve your hand back, away from his, he instead interlocked fingers before laying his head on your shoulder. This time, you became frozen and tense in your spot with a deep red painted on your face.

"S-Senpa--"

"I don't have any classes for the rest of today, but do you want to hang out tonight? You know, after our study session?" He asks groggy and tired.

"Yeah, o-of course."

"Cool, I'll pick you up at 7."

"S-Sure," you answer with a stutter.

The two men stared in awe, glad to see their friend finally content and comfortable with another soul. It's not everyday you see Ryomen Sukuna, the campus' supposed playboy that uses and abuses every chick he sees, become soft for a soul as warm and sweet as honey.

Time Skip

"Perfect. Now, all to do is create an original transition term, briefly address your arguments, counter arguments, and rebuttal, concoct a call to action for the audience, and finish it with a closing personal statement or question," you explain.

Sukuna stares blankly back at you as if you spoke a foreign language. You chuckled in both amusement and embarrassment as you reiterated your explanation.

"Uh, just come up with a word that smoothly transitions to the next paragraph, but makes sure it's not repetitive. Then, rewrite your main reasons in preferably one sentence before coming up with a saying or question for the audience to think about."

His mouth resembles an 'O' shape, displaying his understanding, but your expression dropped.

"You still don't understand, do you?"

"You know me too well," he says, disappointed.

You chuckled at the cute expression, but it instantly dropped seeing the genuine disappointment on his face.

"Sorry, Y/N. I'm really trying, I promise," he softly stated, similar to a whisper.

His head hung low until you held his hand, similarly during lunch. His melancholic expression lifted into a timid blush as his eyes found yours. Your smile displayed itself once more, easing his mind despite his rapid heartbeat.

"I know, Sukuna-senpai. I wouldn't be here if you didn't," you reassure.

"Besides, literature isn't everyone's forte. In fact, nobody enjoys literature."

"You sure? You seem to be diverse in your dialect and vocabulary," he mocks in a goofy tone.

With a light hearted shove to his shoulder, you give him an eye-roll while he softly laughs at the joking atmosphere.

"Knowing and enjoying are incredibly different."

"Yeah, okay," he teases.

"Oh, hush, you jerk."

You both laugh, but keep the volume on the low, considering the fact that your session is in the library. After a few moments of humorously joking around with each other, you both managed to calm down and refocus yourselves on the original purpose of your presence in the library.

"Let's take a break from literature then, and just do math for now," you suggest and he nods in agreement.

In a lighter mood, you both took out your math assignments before discussing the necessary matters regarding the problems stated on the worksheets. It took a minute for you two to understand certain problems, but your cooperation with each other helped you both manage.

As moments pass as you continue to work on your assignments, Sukuna turned his attention to you for a few brief seconds, only to be trapped in an intense gaze, unable to retract itself from looking away at the adorable woman next to him.

With such admiration, he couldn't help, but melt at the sight of your glasses sitting cutely on your nose bridge. The unbreakable concentration you had as you neatly copied your studying notes from your laptop into your well-organized notebook had him subconsciously grinning from ear to ear.

However, it was quick to fade as he mentally slapped himself in attempt to refocus back on his assignments. Yet, he couldn't resist sneaking one last peek of you working. A slight piece of hair fell from your messy bun, falling gracefully in front of your face. It took all the strength he had inside to resist placing that piece of hair behind your ear.

He mentally slapped himself once more, upset at himself for doing such a creepy thing towards you. Sukuna attempted to go back into his work, but he could not sit idly while his mind kept wandering elsewhere, distracting him from the tasks at hand.

Without warning, he decided to just spill out what his heart had been aching to say.

"Thank you," he randomly spouts.

"Hmm?" You hum, still distracted with your work.

"Thanks for today. With, uh, Mizuki. Hadn't it been for you, I would have probably--"

"Done something you regret?"

His neck snaps towards your direction as you sighed before placing down your pen and turning to face him, containing eye contact.

"I could see it. You were restraining yourself, but you were left vulnerable. I couldn't sit by and let that snake abuse you again," you state softly but dangerously.

'Again?' he thought. 'How did she know?'

Sukuna sat there, speechless, too shocked to even think. You place both of his much bigger, calloused hands into your smaller, stubby ones. Your gaze towards him seemed determined and almost angry, but overall sympathetic.

"I could tell, senpai. You flinched and tensed with every step and touch she made towards you. For someone who claims to be "abused", she seemed quite touchy."

He avoids your gaze as he only then realized the obvious body language he displayed once Mizuki appeared.

"I-I, uh, I didn't think it'd be so obvious," he chuckled, sadly.

Your brows furrowed in worry once more seeing the humor your senior attempted to use to cope with his trauma.

"Why didn't you tell anyone, senpai?" You ask, quietly.

He shrugs with a depressing expression, unable to truly let himself process his emotions.

"No one wouldn't have ever allowed me to put my argument in, much less believe me. You know how everyone thinks of me. There'd be no point," he admits with such defeat and melancholy.

With a tight hug, you snuggle into the male's shoulder leaving him surprised. Once it processed in his mind, he hugged you back, grateful for the needed skinship.

"I believe you, senpai. I don't tolerate any form of abuse. Whether it'd be physical or mental, male or female victim, I don't care. If you don't feel safe, just know that I'm here for you, understood? That...is not a question."

Without realizing, a tear falls down his beautiful face as his emotions could no longer be held.

"May I ask you something?"

"Of course, Sukuna-se--"

"Ryomen. Just call me Ryomen," he corrected.

"A-Alright, Ryomen-kun. Are your alright?"

With eyes glimmering from his constant tears, he pulls away from the hug and stares back into your eyes.

"W-Why are you so nice to me?"

The question left you puzzled, wondering why he'd ask such a thing.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, don't you hate me? You know what people think of me, so why do you stay with me? You deserve so much better than a lowlife such as myself. A beautiful soul such as yours shouldn't be corrupted by the likes of m--"

His rant was cut short by a simple embrace of his lips with yours. He froze, startled at the sudden contact, but once his mind was able to process the moment, he melted into the kiss, reaching for your cheeks to caress and deepen the contact.

Usually, he'd flinch or avoid any form of contact with his face, but this time, he didn't mind. In fact, it was almost as if he had yearned for it. With such an exchange, he had only then realized how safe he felt when he's with you, therefore, his body let him relax in your arms.

He finally departed with such rosy cheeks and a few tears rolling down his gorgeous face. Your thumbs were so quick to wipe them away.

"I oughta beat your behind. Don't you ever say that about yourself, understood? All those bullsh*t rumors of you committing such things are stupid. They can't prove you did any of that, you would've been expelled and arrested if you did, and knowing you, you wouldn't hurt a fly."

Your words sunk deeper into his heart as he listened to your encouragement.

"You've been such a gentle and kind heart since the day we met. Everyone else misunderstands and misjudges you, all simply because they have no balls to talk to you and figure out your true nature. Instead, they listen to dog sh*t that people throw in the air. Don't mind them. They're too immature to identify a loving soul when they saw one."

Sobs soon escaped his mouth as you weren't hesitant to embrace him with such warmth and love once more. He quietly cries his emotions into your shoulder, leaving you heartbroken seeing this supposedly lowlife of a man realize the vulnerability within himself. Tears began to burn your eyes from the sight, but you were mainly ecstatic at the progress of the man in your arms in expressing his emotions.

He pulls away with a tear-soaked face while he hiccups from the lack of oxygen in lungs due to his excessive crying. You hold one of his hands while using your free hand to caress his cheek.

"Breath, darling."

He nods as he follows your deep breathing pattern, bringing down his constant hiccups. Once his breathing was decently stable, he looks at you with such sincerity.

"Thank you for everything, Y/N. You don't understand how grateful I am for you. It's just..." he states with a sigh.

"You know, it's hard to truly be myself around others. I mean, I honestly believed Mizuki was the one for me until she proved otherwise. But, my feelings for her were genuine, so when she told me that no one would be able to love me, I-I didn't know what to do."

He looks down, but you were quick to lift his gaze up to meet yours.

"I understand how it feels to be insecure or unworthy of love. I mean, do you see me? I obviously don't fit in society's standards of beauty and I've constantly hurt myself because of it. I've had my share of toxic exes as well, but after a while, I've come to realize that it all starts with self-worth. It took me time, but I managed to acknowledge my self-worth and you should too. It'll be quite the journey, but I'll be right here walking through it with you. You're worthy of so much more than what Mizuki had to offer."

You hold his face in your soft hands, staring intently into his eyes. He smiles, oh so softly, leaning into your gentle touch against his face. He kisses your palms in gratitude, melting your heart at the act.

Such a gorgeous sight.

Suddenly realizing your "too-close-for-comfort" skinship, your eyes widened as you yank your hands back in humiliation.

"S-Sorry! I didn't mean to do that! Well, I did, but you know-- I just, well, you know? And I-- mmph!"

Exactly as before, he silences your rambling with his lips. You were quicker to respond to such a romantic act with his hands on your cheeks. You hum in content as the kiss seemed much more passionate than the one before.

Finally pulling away, you both pant, out of breath from the recent acts of romance.

"That was fire," you state, slightly drunk from the intense scene that had occurred.

He laughs, amused of your reaction.

"Definitely."

A deep blush and shy beam radiated off both of your faces, yet you couldn't bring yourself to look at him despite his intense and attentive stare towards you.

"You're so beautiful, Y/N. I haven't felt so safe in my whole life until you came. Words cannot describe the yearning I have for you and I hope you feel the same," he confesses with light glimmering his eyes so graciously.

At this point, the heat in your cheeks increased so rapidly, you were close to being putty on the floor.

"D-Ditto, sen-- I mean, R-Ryomen-kun," you stuttered, awestruck of the current conversation taking place.

He couldn't resist laughing at your flustered state.

"You're too cute," he laughs.

You quickly were brought back to earth hearing his angelic voice laughing so handsomely. A few chuckles left your mouth as a result. Once you both dialed down, your eyes remained stuck in a love-struck gaze.

"S-So, what now?" You ask.

He shrugs as his fond gaze refused to falter along with his charming smile.

"I honestly don't know, but I do know that we're no longer 'just friends' anymore."

You hum in agreement as you timidly fidget with your fingers mustering every bit of courage to state the next line.

"Well, then, can I-- I don't know, maybe," you stutter unable to say your intended line.

"Can you what, bubs?" He slyly mentions.

The slight pet name threw you in a loop as you no longer could function. Your face blanked in surprise, keeping yourself still for a while. A snap in your face brought you back from your lost gaze, looking back to the male in front of you.

"Are you alright?" He gently asks.

"O-Of course, j-just thinking."

"About?"

You debate whether or not to admit it, but you couldn't miss such an opportunity.

"About when I can make you mi-- I mean, be your's? I mean, I w-won't push you to be min--"

"Yes," he randomly answers with a smile.

"A thousand times, yes. I want you to be mine and I want to be yours. That is, if you'll allow me to."

You peck his lips once more, combining foreheads.

"Of course," you respond with a gleam.

Unable to contain such excitement, he shares a passionate kiss once more, lifting you off the floor. You yelped in surprise as you felt yourself being twirled around as if you didn't weigh more than your average human being.

You mentally were grateful that you both enjoy studying in the very back of the library where almost nobody goes.

Eventually, you both pulled away as an idiotic grin remained plastered on his face.

"H-How are you carrying m--?"

"These guns aren't just for show, bubs," he winks, but instead of a flustered reaction, he received another eye-roll.

"Yeah, yeah. Okay, you can put me down now, Mr. Beef."

"Aww, but I finally have the girl of my dreams in my arms. Can't I hold you a bit longer, bubs?"

He pouts, teasingly yet adorably, as you grumbled under your breath.

"After we finish studying," you negotiated.

He smiled before nodding in agreement. He gives one last peck on your nose before putting your down. Just as you both were about to be seated, a voice caught your attention.

"It's 6 o'clock, love birds."

"Right. Shouldn't you both be getting ready for tonight?"

Confused, you both turn your heads to find Satoru and Suguru standing behind you both, obviously coming out from hiding behind the book shelves.

"You little-- were you guys watching the whole time?!" Sukuna whisper-yelled.

"Well, not necessarily. Satoru was getting bored of just waiting, so he fell asleep until I woke him when things interesting," Suguru explained.

"And that would be?" You asked.

"When you told Sukuna you knew Mizuki was hitting him," the white-haired started with a stupid smile.

"I don't think that's something to say while smiling, senpai," you state.

"Right, my bad."

The male beside you was beyond pissed and embarrassed, whereas you were just confused and rather impressed at the fact that they managed to hide for so long.

"Sorry for intruding in your privacy, but we simply couldn't resist in witnessing our friend finally establishing a romance with the only girl on this campus that I'd respectfully call a woman," Suguru added.

"Yeah, you kick *ss, Y/N-san. After Mizuki, we weren't really sure if we'd accept anyone as Ryomen-chan's partner, but you're the only one who actually treats our friend well, so yeah. Just don't freak out when you find out he has an anime obsession. Them anime girls don't play around," Satoru says.

Sukuna did not hesitate to approach the white hair to give a nice bonk on Satoru's head, but you were quick to interfere.

"Wait! You watch anime, too?! Do you watch One Piece?! What about Studio Ghibli?! What's your favorite film?!" You ramble with eyes twinkling similar to a puppy's.

His anger soon withered seeing you so happy. Being such a hardcore geek himself, he didn't hesitate to respond.

"Y-Yeah. Didn't get far in One Piece, but still love it. With Studio Ghibli, maybe Ponyo or Grave of the Fireflies?"

You gasped in amazement, absolutely ecstatic at this new fact of your new partner. Literal stars dazzled from your eyes.

The three of the men couldn't help, but be heart struck of your reaction.

"That's it. Suguru, we're looking for thick babes from now on," Satoru whines, feeling single seeing his friend with such a lady.

"For once, I can't disagree with you," the latter states.

"Have fun on your date, you two. Treat her nice, Ryo, or else, Satoru and I won't be able to help ourselves and you know how much we love to share."

Boom, red all over your face.

The two wink in unison as they leave the library, leaving you and your slightly irritated boyfriend alone. Your man was quick to turn to you, almost desperate and hurt.

"Please don't leave me, bubs. I can't lose you, especially to the likes of them," Sukuna snarls.

You laugh at his jealousy and shared a peck on his forehead as he pouted.

"Would never, baby. Only you."

~~~~~~~~~~

Hope you enjoyed!

Good night, my loves ❤

[danceswithsporks]

Calm- Part 6

Part 2 of 6 in the Complete Series

Wrecker x Seamstress!Reader

Parts 1 2 3 4 5

Authors note: Coming in under the wire!! I wanted to get this out before the end of the year and talk about cutting it close!! This one isn’t as long as my other ones but I truly hope you enjoy it all the same.

This will be my final post for the year! It’s been an amazing year getting to write for all of you and develop this series! It’s still so crazy to think that I started out the year with barely any interaction and now I actually have you wonderful ppl waiting to read my work! I seriously can’t thank you all enough for your support!

I will be taking the first two weeks of the year off from all writing to give my brain a break. Between 5 different fics, 3 that aren’t Star Wars related, I’m starting to wear thin. I have a bunch of Legos to build and a back log of video games to play so I’ll totally not be productive at all. Which is what I honestly need lol.

I sincerely hope you’ve all had a lovely Christmas and a happy holidays. Have a safe and fun new years and I’ll see you in probably a month!

Without further ado, please enjoy Part 6 of Calm!

Chapter About: a month has gone by and some things are coming to light.

Calm was the only way to describe the night compared to the chaos that had been the day. Chai had left that morning. Unable to handle being on the island anymore. How could you blame her? She’d lost the one her heart had been yearning for. The one that made her warm all over. In the back of your mind, just barely visible behind the terror of stepping foot on a starship, you’d thought about the same thing if Wrecker hadn’t returned. Your aunt had been begging for you to visit Coruscant and you would learn a lot working with her. But you’d been lucky, your warmth and security had returned to you. Her’s hadn’t.

It had been a month since he’d returned to you and what a month it had been. You were, for lack of a better word, exhausted. Between your day-to-day work, caring for Omega, and being there for Wrecker, you’d barely slept. Most nights started the same, everyone would settle after dinner and you’d put time aside to brush Omega's hair and talk with the girl before going to Wrecker's side. The two of you would sit beneath the night sky and watch for shooting stars. Wrecker would tell you stories of his life before Pabu, of the adventures he’d had with his brothers. Even tales about fighting alongside the Jedi. He’d even discovered the name of the Jedi that had saved you.

Kit Fisto.

He’d asked Echo about the Jedi when he’d checked on his brothers a few days after they’d returned. Echo had served with two Jedis who had worked with Jedi Master Fisto on a few occasions. From what Echo had told Wrecker, he had been amazing and kind. All the more reason you never believed that they’d turn traitor against the galaxy.

As for how his brothers were doing, it seemed the one they’d saved, Crosshair, was having a hard time adjusting to his new life. Wrecker, being the joy and light of the group, had taken it upon himself to try and help his brother adjust. A decision that weighed heavily on him. You could see it whenever the two of you would go silent at night. He’d stare into the stars and you could see the sadness peeking through the happy mask he wore.

But it was at night when the darkness wrapped its cool arms around all of you and lulled the island to sleep, did you see the true depths of how much the two you cared for so fiercely were suffering. If it wasn’t Omega suffering from night terrors and screaming herself awake, it was Wrecker tossing and turning in his sleep. You wouldn’t tell him that he kept you awake at night, that he spoke and mumbled about that day in his sleep a lot. That when you weren’t lying with Omega and stroking her hair until she was asleep once more, you were laying beside him listening to his words. Listening to how his heart ached from the pain and knowing that every morning he woke up and masked it all for the sake of his siblings.

So every morning, for the last month, you woke up before him and Omega, then got dressed and made them all breakfast. You’d pack three extra breakfasts and lunches for Omega to drop off at the inn as she headed to school and Doll would handle dinner. She’d send some fresh market supplies with Omega as she headed home for the three of you and you’d make dinner for your small family. During the time that she was in school, you would do your usual work around your shop and Wrecker would help you with whatever he could before checking on his brothers. The three of you would share dinner as Omega told you two about her day, watch a holo, shower, and then bedtime for Omega while you and Wrecker spent time together alone. Tackle whoever was struggling in the night and get whatever sleep you could manage. Rinse and repeat.

The routine had become almost second nature to you and through it all, you felt as though you were hiding your exhaustion pretty well.

Except you weren’t.

Wrecker had noticed your exhaustion pretty early on. But never could he pinpoint why you were so tired. Sure, every once in a while he’d be woken up by you holding him and telling him everything was ok. But it wasn’t enough to make you exhausted every day, was it? Most nights when he woke up, you were peacefully asleep next to him. That was until a few nights ago when he woke up to the bed empty, a night terror scaring him awake. In the darkness of the night, he’d followed the soft sound of your voice to see you sitting in Omega's bed with the girl's head in your lap. You gently stroked her hair and told her a story as she drifted. The next day as they both walked to the inn, he’d asked her how often you did that. When she revealed that it was nearly every night and that sometimes she heard him calling out. He realized that you’d been up every night taking care of them. On top of everything else you did for them and his brothers, it was no wonder you were so drained.

He’d made a vow to himself that day, that he’d do his best to wake up to Omega the next time she called out.

His chance came only a few days later.

You’d felt yourself beginning to drift when the familiar sound of Omega crying out echoed down the hall. With a quiet hum, you threw your legs over the side of the bed and began to get up. Wrecker's warm hand landed on your shoulder and pulled you back into the warmth of the bed instead. You hadn’t even realized he was still awake. “Wrecker? What are you doing?” Your name echoed down the hall from Omega's room making your heart ache to go to her side.

“I got her tonight. Get some sleep. sarad.” He leaned over and gently kissed your cheek before standing from the bed.

“But you need to sleep, Wrecker.” You savored the gentle show of affection from the clone. Aside from a few kisses here and there and the cuddling you did outside every night, the two of you hadn’t been intimate. You were far too exhausted at the end of every day to be in the mood and somehow you felt it was the same for your clone. The only difference was that his exhaustion was emotional while yours was physical.

Wrecker shook his head while standing in the doorway. “Tonight, you need to sleep, my love. Please, let me handle Omega.” You opened your mouth to speak once more but he heals his hand up to stop you. “Please.”

That beautiful pleading eye was enough to make you nod slowly to him. “Ok.” You couldn’t argue with him when he looked at you like that. He smiled at you and blew you a kiss before turning and disappearing into the dark hall. You could still hear Omega crying out and it made you worry that he wouldn’t be able to handle it. But soon his deep voice could be heard speaking to the young girl. Sighing softly, you leaned back in the bed and rested your head against the headboard with your eyes closed. With how exhausted you were, it would be easy for you to fall asleep, wouldn’t it?

-*-

Wrecker returned to your room thirty minutes later expecting to find you peacefully asleep. Instead, he found the light turned on and you sitting up, staring at the datapad in your hands. “Mesh’la,” he said with such sadness that it made you feel guilty for still being awake. “Why aren’t you sleeping?”

You chewed your lip as you watched him step around the bed to your side. Kneeling beside you, he took your hand between both of his large hands. “It’s hard for me to sleep when I know she’s struggling.” Not to mention you had a good deal on your mind.

A soft sigh left the giant as one of his thumbs stroked your hand. “Thank you for taking care of her…and me. I’m sorry I haven’t said that enough this past month.”

“Wrecker, you don’t…” a thick finger was pressed against your lips, shushing you gently.

“Please, let me speak?” When you nodded slowly to him, he continued. “I’ve spent the last month lost in my thoughts and problems. Trying to juggle my feelings while helping Cross and keeping Omega as happy as I can. I was so distracted I didn’t realize that it wasn’t as hard as it could have been because you were ahead of me taking care of…” he shook his head in disbelief. “Well…all of us. Especially myself and Omega. You take care of my brothers, sister and I like we’re your family. You hold me and her nearly every night and soothe us from our demons. You make food and clothes for all five of us and still run your shop. All on very little sleep.” His eyes shifted to the datapad in your hand that had a holo of yourself and Chai on it. “And through all of that, you held yourself together when your dearest friend left the island. You’re…Stars, you’re so much stronger than me. I don’t know how I managed to get so lucky to have ya in my life. But thank you, Sarad. Thank you for taking care of me and Omega. I’m sorry I didn’t say that sooner.” He kissed the back of your hand with gentle lips while you squeezed his hand that was still in yours.

Reaching down with your other hand, you cupped his cheek and turned his face to face yours. “You don’t need to thank me for anything. Nor do you need to apologize. I don’t mind taking care of you. You’re going through so much right now. Losing a family member, especially one so close, isn’t easy and I want to be the support for you that I also had. I love you so much, Wrecker. I love Omega so much as well. She’s like the little sister I always wanted. Knowing what you’re going through and the pain you both must feel makes all these long nights worth it. If I had the choice, I’d do it all the same. I wouldn’t change a single moment of this last month.” You gave the hand that was still holding yours a slight tug, motioning for him to join you in the bed. With a nod, he stood and crawled into the large bed next to you. You repositioned yourself so that you both were looking at one another while also making it so he could see your datapad. “Chai leaving…hurts. She was a dear friend and trying to think of life on the island without her is…hard. But I have you, Omega, and Doll.”

Wrecker watched and you changed the holo to one of you, Doll, and Chai on the beach. “Would you have gone with her? If I hadn’t come back?”

You swallowed a large lump in your throat. “I’ve asked myself that question a lot today. Asked myself if I was in her shoes, if I’d lost the one I loved, would I leave?”

“And?” Wrecker watched you carefully, wondering what you’d say.

“I don’t know honestly. I want to say that I’d stay here for Omega. She’d need someone to help her through all of this through the loss of you. But at the same time…” you sighed softly while placing the datapad down and nuzzling into his chest. “Being here without you? It sounds like torture.”

His strong arms wrapped around you and pulled you close, a kiss being placed on the top of your head. “It’s hard to imagine my life without you. If I lost you I’d leave.”

“It’ll never come to that, thankfully.” Your eyes shut as he kissed the top of your head.

No. It wouldn’t. Wrecker would sacrifice his own life before allowing anything bad to happen to you. “Get some sleep, Sarad. Tonight it's you who should be held.” His arms remained tight around you as you began to drift. Tomorrow he’d make it all up to you. Pay you back for the month-long care you’d doled out to him and his vod. He whispered a gentle ‘I love you’ before pressing the light control beside the bed and plunging the room back into darkness.

-*-

You were confused when you woke up, the sun already high in the sky and your room glowing brightly from the rays. Why hadn’t your alarm gone off? If the sun was that high then it had to be well past morning meaning you were late for a lot of things. “Wrecker?” Pulling yourself out of the bed, you continued to call his name while heading out of the room. You found him in the kitchen. “What time is it?”

Wrecker turned and smiled at you, a pair of oven mitts very tightly on his hands. “Good afternoon, Sleepyhead.”

“I take it that means it’s past midday?” When he nodded, that big goofy grin on his lips, you sighed softly. That grin was contagious and even though you were upset about sleeping in so late, you smiled back. “Something tells me you have something to do with my alarm not going off?” You watched as he walked over to you and handed you a cup of coffee.

“Ya deserved to sleep in. Don’t worry, sent Omega off with food for the others like you do.” He watched you take a sip of the warm liquid and close your eyes in bliss. Good, you liked it.

You’d forgotten that he knew what he was doing in the kitchen. You’d done all the cooking since he’d been back. “You did? Thank you.” Wrecker stepped forward and took your hand carefully in the oven mitt. “These feel a little small.” You playfully squeezed his hand and the gentle giant laughed brightly while leading you towards the table.

“Might need to get some bigger ones.” He wiggled his free hand at you in the blue and green mitt. “Also told ‘Mega to take her time coming home today.” When you raised an eyebrow at him, he kissed the tip of your nose. “Was hoping you’d do me the honor of being my date tonight.”

“Your date? What’s the occasion?” To your surprise, he pulled off the mitt with his teeth and let it fall to the ground. The mug of coffee in your hand was placed gently on the table and with a smirk, he leaned in and kissed your soft lips. You could taste something sweet on his lips, perhaps from whatever he was cooking. Whatever it was, you enjoyed it. A hum left you as you enjoyed the sweet moment with your clone.

Wrecker ran his tongue across yours for a few moments before humming and pulling away. Your lips looked nice and plump for him as he licked his lips. “The occasion is that I’ve been home for a month and haven’t treated my girl to a single special night. Instead, she’s been working that cute ass of hers off taking care of me and my family. It’s time for me to take care of her instead.”

“Wrecker, you don’t have to do anything special for me. I don’t mind taking care of all of you. You’re all my family now.” To your surprise, he chuckled softly while shaking his head. “What’s so funny, strong man?”

“Just how you think you don’t deserve the galaxy on a platter for how amazing you’ve been. I don’t think there’s nearly enough I can do to show you how thankful I am for you.” He reached up and held your chin between his thumb and forefinger, enjoying the way your beautiful eyes sparkled. “But I’ll spend the rest of my life doing what I can.” He kissed you once more before pulling away and standing. “Starting with today being a relaxing day for ya.”

Stars, he knew just what to say to make your heart flutter. “That’s sweet of you, Wrecker. But I can’t just take the day off from my shop. I have shipments coming in. Plus, chores around the house that need to be done, alterations on Crosshair’s pants that need to happen, and…” his finger rested against your lips shushing you once more. It seemed to be the theme of the day.

“Shipment already came in and I moved it to the back of your shop. The old ladies are gonna keep an eye on things for the day and Magda has already started on Cross’s pants. Already did the dishes and made lunch for ya. I can handle some sweeping and laundry.” He’d done all these things himself growing up on Kamino. Surely it wasn’t that different here? His hand slid and cupped your cheek before running his thumb across your cheekbone. “Please, just relax today. For me.”

He was giving you the cutest puppy eyes ever right now and how could you resist that luscious brown eye? A small giggle left you while nodding “ok, ok. It does sound like you’ve got everything under control right now. But what do I do?” You weren’t exactly used to this much downtime.

Wrecker chuckled before kissing your cheek quickly. “Eat, first off. Then let me help you relax.”

The comment made your eyebrow raise. “And just how will you do that?” He’d started to head towards the kitchen to no doubt grab your food when he suddenly stopped and smirked over his shoulder to you. The look made excitement race through your entire body. It had been nearly a month since you’d last felt this feeling.

“Don’t worry, Sarad. I still have a few secrets up my sleeves.” He watched you bite your lip at the implications of his words. Good. It had been far too long since he’d been inside you. Something he’d realized that morning as he watched you sleep peacefully, the hem of your sleep shirt riding up and revealing your cute ass to him. He’d failed a lot when it came to you this past month. There would be every intention of making it all up to you now and boy did he have a lot planned.

-*-

“W-Wrecker! Ah!” Your head tilted back as tiny gasps left your lips. The clone between your legs grumbled something you couldn’t understand making your clit vibrate. His deep voice rumbling against your heat was driving you crazy. You were so grateful that Omega would be in school for another two hours. The last thing you needed to happen would be the girl walking in on her brother devouring your pussy. Though the chances of being caught by someone were still very much there. Magda and Sue could easily walk over from the shop at any moment and see you here with your legs wrapped around the head of the large clone. His face covered in your first release and no doubt soon, your second.

He could easily listen to you make these sweet little sounds all day. The way your body arched against his mouth and those sexy pants and cries of yours. Damn did they turn something inside him. Breaking away from your heat, he looked up at you through hooded lids. “Any louder and the grandmas in the shop might start to get curious.” You cried out a cute ‘it feels too good’ making Wrecker chuckled deeply while blowing his hot breath against the sensitive nub. “Good. I want my girl to feel as good as possible.”

His hot lips returned to your clit once more, making you whine and wiggle against him. “Please, need you inside me.” This felt good, really good, fuck it felt downright amazing, but you needed him inside you. You needed that closeness more than you needed air right now.

It was so damn cute when you begged. Wrecker broke his lips from you once more before moving your legs from his shoulder and down to his hips. He slotted his place between them and pressed his still-clothed bulge against your soaking core. Leaning over your body in a protective cage, Wrecker kissed you deeply. “Patience, Goddess. Can’t rush the best part.” Came in a rough whisper between kisses.

You could taste yourself in him and realized that you’d never tire of the mixed taste. You squeaked as a large digit found its place on your pearl and quickly you were crying out against his lips. “F-fuck, I’m gonna cum again.” His lips found your throat as your head fell back, a long moan of pleasure leaving you.

“Good girl. That’s right. Cum for me again.” He rubbed his bulge against your heat and sighed at the way you moaned his name. Did he want to fuck you into the couch right now? Maker, yes. But right now it was about treating you to the most amazing day possible in thanks for the past month. His pleasure would have to wait until later. For now, it was all about you. His other hand made its way to your heat, dipping into your soaked core with ease. “Look at that, taking three fingers today.” Looked to him like your pussy was ready for him now. Hopefully, that would hold throughout the day.

You nearly came at the feeling of the three thick fingers inside of you. It felt nearly as thick as him, just barely matching the girth of your lover. “N-not as good as your d-dick.” Your hips rolled against his hands as you tried to chase your release. So damn close.

“True.” Wrecker moved his lips to your ear and growled deeply. “We can compare later tonight when I fuck ya into the bed.” You cried out against him at the words. His fingers twisting as you did so hitting the spot inside you that would have you covering his hands. Rough lips pressed against the smoothness of yours as he swallowed your screams of ecstasy. Yes, your release tasted amazing to him but your breath as you peaked tasted even better.

Pants of exhaustion rolled from your lips as you rode out your release. The lewd sound of his fingers squelching between your now-soaked thighs filled the air, as did the unmistakable scent of sex. If anyone was to walk in now then they’d have a clear idea of what had just been done. “S-still want you.” Your eyes shut as exhaustion began to take you over. While your energy had been zapped, you were positive that you could find some extra stores to enjoy him. To your surprise, he shook his head no and pulled away from you. His fingers slipped from your heat making you whine softly. Brown eyes stared into yours as his fingers slipped into his mouth and he licked your release from the digits. A long sigh left the clone as he savored the taste and the heat that had just left your body and returned once more. “Please, Wrecker.”

The clone chuckled as he watched your cute little body wiggle with exhausted need. “Now, now.” His hand wrapped around your soaked thigh and squeezed it gently. “Gotta be patient. You’ll get this later.” He rubbed his bulge against your core before finally pulling away and closing your legs. “Give ya something to look forward to.” Wrecker winked at you before moving to get something to clean you up with.

“So is that a promise for later activities?” You leaned back on your elbows and watched him smirk at you before he disappeared down the hall. You took a moment to try and think about how you’d gotten into this position. How you’d gone from cuddling on the couch watching a romance holo to him wearing your thighs like earmuffs. You honestly couldn’t seem to pinpoint the exact moment. The last two hours had been spent in happy bliss with the clone running around cleaning while you watched patiently from the couch. The lunch he’d made you had tasted magnificent and you’d made a mental note to allow him to cook more often. The remnants of which sat on the small table in front of your couch. He’d made you a quiche Lorraine with a delicious salad on the side. It tasted magnificent and you’d found yourself falling for him even more. After you’d finished eating he’d thrown a load of laundry into the wash and pulled you into his lap to show you the holo his brother had recommended. What the premise was had been lost to you quickly as Wrecker had started his teasing. Now here you lay waiting for him to return to you. If this was what was in store for the day then gods help you survive.

Wrecker returned to your side within moments with a warm rag in his hand. Down the hall, the sound of the shower running could be heard echoing against the stone walls. He’d set up everything you’d need for a nice long shower. You’d told him one night before he’d left how your favorite thing to do was take a long shower where you got to just enjoy the warmth of the water running over your body. He’d pull a warm towel from the dryer once you neared completion of your shower to wrap you in. Then cozy clothes and off to your date. Leaning down, he kissed you sweetly with a playful twinkle in his eye. “It is.”

-*-

You looked up at the imposing ship before you. The Marauder. The ship that had brought your love to you and had taken him and his brothers away only to return with one less on it. It terrified you. The ramp was down and the clone you spent every night dreaming about stood in its entryway with his hand outstretched towards you. You shook your head free of the hundreds of worry-filled thoughts racing through it and stared at him. “W-what?”

“I asked if you would join me inside.” He watched you carefully, watched the way you shifted, and fidgeted with the hem of your shirt. He’d had a feeling that this would be how you’d react, it had been a gamble to decide to do the date inside the starship. But he wanted to help you with your fear. Because if you could get on a starship then he could show you the beauty of the galaxy outside of your world and take you to some of his favorite planets. Planets that you’d only dreamed of that he knew for sure existed out there. Wrecker walked down the ramp and stopped in front of you with his hand still outstretched. “The ship is off and I have no intention of turning it on. The door will remain open if you want.” He lowered his hand and sighed softly while moving a strand of your hair behind your ear. “We can sit in the doorway and eat if that’ll make it easier.”

The way that deep brown eye was staring at you was making your heart flutter. How could you say no to him when he'd thought this all through? “C-can we go slow?” He nodded to you and you slid your hand into one of his. “O-ok.” Wrecker turned and led you to the bottom of the ramp, waiting for you to take the first step. Your foot met the metal of the starship ramp with a soft thunk at the same time a lump began to form in your throat. Your heart raced with each ascending step until you were halfway to the door. It was starting to get harder to breathe. The world around you felt like it was caving in and soon the ground would open up and swallow you whole.

“We can stop here, Stitches.” Wrecker stood only two steps behind you, watching every one of your movements. He knew that if the roles were reversed then he wouldn’t want someone pushing him too much to face his fear.

You quickly shook your head while taking another step. “I can do this. Like you said. It’s not even on.” Stars, why did the air feel so thick? It was like you were breathing through a straw! Your foot raised to take the next step and suddenly it felt as though lead was tied to the bottom of it. Why was this so damn hard? It had only been…a year since the last time you’d stepped on a starship. It had been a lot longer than you’d realized. You forced your foot down and froze as you stood in the entryway to the ship. It was a lot smaller than you thought it would be.

The slowness with which you walked up the ramp worried Wrecker. This was too much for you. It was clear you were struggling. “Sarad?” He reached out to you, making you jump suddenly. You turned and uttered ‘I’m sorry’ before burying your face into his chest. “Shhh, it’s ok.” He rubbed your back gently, doing his best to calm you. Stepping back with you still in his arms, Wrecker tried to lead the way back down the ramp. But you stopped him, your foot raised as though you were trying to step backward into the ship. Perhaps he could help you? Take your mind off of the worry by distracting you?

“My love.” He placed his finger under your chin and tilted your face up towards him. “Have I ever told you about the first time I saw a nebula in person?” Your head shook slightly against his touch. “It was…breathtaking. Like staring at all the greatest works of art at once. Tech once broke down how a nebula was formed and what it was made of, but I didn’t listen. All I knew was that the way the colors danced together was mesmerizing. It was the first time I’d ever understood the meaning of true beauty.” He looked down at you and ran his thumb across your bottom lip. “But then I met you.” Wrecker leaned down and kissed you deeply. “You’re far more beautiful than a nebula. I want you to see one in person and truly understand how beautiful you are. One day I will take you to see the same Nebula.”

“I can’t even step foot on a starship. How can you be so sure that you’ll take me to see it?” You pressed your lips against his once more and savored the way they molded into yours. This man, this magnificent man, always knew how to speak to you. How to make your heart beat fast and your head spin.

“Because.” He whispered while pulling away from your touch. “You’re already part of the way there.”

“What?” You looked around and realized you were standing in the center of the starship. How had he done that? “H-how?”

Wrecker hummed sweetly while moving around you towards the little table with your dinner waiting. Behind you Gonky chittered as he slowly hobbled his way out of the ship and down the ramp, giving the two of you privacy. “You're easy to distract, my goddess.” He pulled a stool back and motioned for you to take a seat. “We can leave at any time.”

He’d distracted you so well that you’d easily backed into the Marauder without realizing it. Now that you were inside of the ship, it wasn’t too bad. How long that feeling would last was unknown but you’d try your best to enjoy the time that you could. You walked over to him and placed your hand against his chest, taking a moment to allow the feeling of his heartbeat beneath your palm to calm you. “Thank you.” You weren’t sure how many times you’d thank him during this. But something told you it would be a lot. You took a seat on the stool and felt Wrecker easily slide you forward.

“I hope ya don’t mind, but I used that roast you had in the fridge for our dinner.” He pulled the cover off the container that held your dinner to reveal the still steaming roast surrounded by potatoes and root vegetables. It was the first roast he’d successfully cooked, he hoped it tasted good.

Your mouth watered at the sight of the food before you. “Not at all. It looks amazing, Wrecker.” It smelled wonderful too. There was a chance he was a better cook than you. Perhaps you could have Omega be the judge of that. Though you did have the feeling that the girl would choose her brother's food over yours. Wrecker smiled that adorable crooked smile at you as he began to cut a piece off the roast for you, pride flowing off of him in waves. Gods, he was adorable. You took the moment to look around the small space you were in, getting your first real glance at the ship. It was small and compact. Towards the back, you could see a few bunks as well as a curtain at the top of a small ladder. You stood from your stool and walked towards the curtain. “What’s this?”

Wrecker looked up from the roast to you standing at the base of the ladder. “That's where Omega sleeps when we’re traveling.” He placed the utensils in his hands down and walked behind you. Reaching up, he moved the curtain to the side and motioned for you to climb up and take a peak. “Don’t got a lot of space here. So we made do with what we could.”

You carefully climbed up the ladder just enough to peek into the space. It seemed to be the perfect size for the young girl. A few curtains had been hung up to give her privacy with string lights being added for a warm feel. Her pillows and blankets were stored to the side while a few little trinkets funk doubt from their travels lay next to the pile. “Is this all she has?” Omega had arrived at your place with very little.

“We fled Kamino in a hurry. She wasn’t able to grab much. None of us were.” But they’d saved each other and AZI and that was enough for now. He watched you climb back down the ladder and turn to look at him. “Ain’t got a lot of space here so we try not to buy too much.”

“Oh.” Well now that they were staying here with you and she had her room. Maybe it was time to take her to one of the bigger islands for a shopping trip. Your eyes fell on a larger lower bunk. “Is this your bunk?” Moving around the large clone, you sat on the stiff material. It seems stiff and uncomfortable was the theme when it came to army-issued materials.

Wrecker rubbed the back of his head and nodded. “Y-yeah.” He should have cleaned up more before bringing you here. “Sorry bout the mess.” He motioned to the bundle of blankets at the bottom of the bunk and the few pieces of scattered clothes.

A familiar dark bag peeked out from behind the pillow as you looked around the bunk. “You kept it very close, didn’t you?” With a playful grin, you rolled onto your stomach and reached for the bag, only being stopped by two large hands around your waist.

“Kept it close enough to smell it every night that I slept. Might need to update it before our next trip.” The sight of you like this on his bunk was doing something to him. He’d seen you on your knees in front of him a few times now and while it was hot as fuck, it was never this hot. “Mesh’la, we better get back to dinner.”

His grip on your waist tightened making you hum and rock back towards him. “Dinner can wait, I'd rather be filled a different way first.” Besides, eating after a workout was always good for the body, right?

A low growl left Wrecker as he rubbed the growing bulge in his pants against your ass. Now that he thought about it, if he fucked you here then he’d be the first to fuck someone in the Marauder. A tantalizing notion that was far too good to pass up. Watching his head, he leaned over and pressed his body against yours with one hand on your waist and the other snaking its way around your throat. “I’m gonna need to lock the door then. Can’t have anyone ruining your meal.” He nipped at your earlobe while pressing into your ass. “That ok?”

Fuck, was there anything hotter than him asking for your consent? Maybe the sight of him naked? It didn’t matter. You nodded quickly as your kind filled with all the delicious positions you could try out on the ship and in his bunk. You’d never fucked on a starship, how interesting and new it would be. His lips pressed to the side of your neck as he hastily kissed your skin before quickly moving to shut and lock the door. Its hiss filled the ship and for a moment that tightening pressure on your chest began to return making you feel like the walls were closing in. But then he took off his shirt so you could see those delicious muscles and the feeling began to dissipate. It seemed Wrecker was just the distraction you’d need to get through this. “Where do you want me?”

His deep brown eye watched as you turned and faced him once more. That sly and mischievous smirk on your lips. Your arms crossed in front of you and in one swift movement, your shirt was removed revealing a dark green bra. His mouth watered at the sight of the material covering what he wanted. “That bunk.” He motioned to the one across from his with a devilish smirk. “On Hunter's bunk.”

-*-

Hunter stared at the Marauder with a look of confusion on his face. He could have sworn he’d left the door open. It was Pabu after all. It wasn’t like someone was going to steal the ship and after the last time it had been stolen, Tech had put in a new system where their datapads would need to be in the cockpit for it to turn on. So why was the door shut?

“Gonk Gonk Gonk Gonk”

“Gonky?” Echo tilted his head as he stood next to his vod. “What are you doing out here?”

“Gonk Gonk Gonk.”

Amber eyes squinted as Echo translated out loud for Hunter to hear. “Wrecker asked you to give him and Stitches the space for dinner?”

“Gonk”

“Huh, thought Wrecker said she was terrified of starships.” Hunter shrugged while walking up the ramp towards the door. When it didn’t automatically open, he frowned.

Echo followed close behind and noticed the way Hunter's head tilted from side to side. “Maybe he’s helping her work on it? Speaking of which, we should find a way to thank her for all the food she’s been sending.” And the custom-tailored clothes as well. Echo watched Hunter place his ear against the cool steel and close his eyes, no doubt listening to see if it was a good time to enter.

“Ah, W-Wrecker. Fuck!” Your voice carried through the steel as well as the little pants and whines you were making.

“fuck you’re so damn pretty when you make that noise. Such a good girl taking all of me.” Wrecker’s deep bass of a voice was hard to miss as it mixed with your pants.

Hunter felt his cheeks flare at the sounds coming from inside the ship. Why him? Why did he have to be the one with enhanced hearing? He pulled away and headed back down the ramp. “Come on, we’ll grab the chip later.”

“Wait, what? Why?” Echo stumbled after the leader of their group. “We came all the way over here. If we have any chance of breaking the encryption on that datapad then we need Techs chip.”

“Trust me. Echo. It can’t wait until tomorrow.” There was no way Hunter was going to explain why they needed to come back later. He honestly hoped that Echo would figure it out on his own.

“What is stopping us from sneaking in right now and grab… oh.” The way Hunter was looking at him had suddenly made things a lot more clear. “Oh.” His eyes went wide. “oh!” Echo needed to wash his ears and eyes and maybe his brain now. He should have just listened to Hunter in the first place. Shaking his head and shivering slightly, he followed the bandana-wearing clone back towards the inn. “Better not be on my bunk.”

Tag List:

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[uyuforu]

Mmmh i don’t think it will be his 1st gf, and I don’t think it will be his 1st love. He dated before and will before her (fs) but I feel like it’s going to be a great love, a one true live vibe, you know? But I don’t think it’s the 1st. But it will feel like that!

I agree with the part of him having gfs before his wife but our hopeless romantic Libra venus dude ain't been in love or in da luv he desires because no.1 he got a Libra venus,these people be having sky high expectations,desiring to be loved but not actually loving da partner but instead being in luv with da relationship.this dudy be liking the yearning for da 1,fated love,destiny,soulmates,etc. Like he aint never loved cuz yall listened to his songs? Man's always yearning for her and what not no.2 folks shouldn't forget he's a virgo stellium,they be DA most practical people on the planet so dude knows who is worth his time and who aint so him already knowing that nah she aint the one but still i can be in a relationship cuz dats what i like is very possible cuz he a libra venus.no.3 i also agree on him not being totally aware of his spiritual gifts,Neow he got that stellium in the eighth house of taboo,ocult,transformation,inheritance,s3x,spirituality,astro stuff.so he unconsciously does that stuff and the possibility of him going to tarot reader and astrologers is likely high and there have been times he and V have talked about their korean astrology experience so he definitely goes to them but he a practical guy too cuz he virgo dominant so has a hard time believing such stuff.no.4 his Libra venus opposes his Aries saturn.i already told ya bout the Libra venus and its in 17° neow it does tell about his preference cuz of da degree duhh but its a leo° and they tend to like glamorous people that everyone wants,someone who be having people break their necks,lion or cat like people.its in the ninth house the house of many things but also wisdom so gud amount of these peeps date after gaining a certain type maturity and like wise partner to be by their side too and she is a foreigner too btw.no.5 his saturn is in Aries but at 19° its a libra degree,it's venus ruled. so this degree does signify finding love later than most if in saturn but if it wasn't for this degree then he woulda actually loved cuz we got Aries there they impulsive and quick.no.6 The opposition's in saturn and venus also delays love and he's got a Libra venus folks so it makes a lot of sense for love to happen after maturity or late especially for saturnian folks cuz they late bloomers so after his saturn return he'll be getting dat true love dat is gon' be his first and only love too,gotta be happy for though cuz son needs some love in his life too.his new chart makes alotta sense to me than the old one.

I got 19 years of experience in astrology and spirituality and imma say it louder for the people in the back that 👏THIS ADMIN RIGHT HERE CALLED UYU BE DOING A GREAT JOB BY PUTTING IN SO MUCH ENERY IN HER WORK AND GIVING LONG EXPLANATIONS TO DA PEOPLE AND DAT TOO IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE.I SEE ALOTTA POTENTIAL IN YOU UYU👏

I'm so proud of you ma boo for representing astrology at such a young age and if you continue then you gon' be one of da best ones at it.keep it up.😘😘

That keeps me going I swear, these kind of comments make my day TT... Thank you so so much... <3

[rinbowaman]

My Roommates Ex - Chapter 3

Chapter 3! Woohoo!

Pairings: You and Heeseung

Warnings: Uh yeah, this one has lots of smut. Unprotected sex, sexual dominance, maybe a hint/vibe of slight breeding kink and pain kinks. Not terribly so with this chapter, but future chapters...yeah we're going to have a talk about that.

Summary:

Months had passed since then, and Vicky transferred to a different school. She cut off her ties with Gabe and said goodbye to the girls as she embraced a newfound outlook in life.

You were shocked the day when she told you as you entered the dorm room to see her waiting on your bed, she greeted you with a smile and patted down on a pile of neatly folded clothes and accessories that laid on your bedspread next to her.

“I wanted to give these to you. I don’t need them anymore.” She looked up to you and smiled widely.

Though it was a nice gesture, you didn’t necessarily have the same taste as Vicky when it came to clothes and the number of accessories she used. The sense of fashion was very similar, but the fondness of wearing such revealing attire, especially daily, wasn’t your thing. A crop top here and there might have been okay, but you already knew that her gift was going to be unused.

Still, you accepted them graciously.

That’s when she informed you of her decision to transfer. She explained that after thinking about it, it was something she deeply yearned for. A fresh start.

Both you and the girls went with Vicky to the airport, giving her a proper send off. Everyone cried as they took turns hugging and sharing words. You were the last one to say goodbye to, but it felt like you were the one that Vicky wanted to hug the most, upon feeling the tight and prolonged squeeze of her embrace. Her words brought the tears to glaze over your eyes.

“As painful as it was, seeing Ethan finding happiness with someone else, was something that I needed to see. It was something that needed to happen, in order for me to be the person I truly want to be.” She smiles as she admits.

Those were her last words as you before she left for her terminal, waving widely towards you and the girls as she smiled.

Keeping in touch, many texts and phone calls were exchanged daily. You were always happy to hear that Vicky was doing well, she was becoming exceedingly happy. Changing her program while also making new friends, you felt immense joy for her. Especially at the mention of a certain young man she had began seeing, a student of the same college that had fancied her ever since she transferred.

Though Vicky turned a new leaf, some things will never change. You chuckled the moment she revealed that the man was the son of the CEO that managed one of the largest corporations in the country. But you smiled whole heartedly as you saw that she still had her heart in the right place, identified as she mainly spoke of the young man’s personality more than his inheritance.

At times you gazed at the side of the room she had previously occupied, it was now stark empty. It triggered you to leak out a few tears sometimes. Knowing she was doing much better in her new setting; you couldn’t help but sometimes wish she was still with you.

Often succumbing to leaking a few tears whenever you saw her side of the room. She had become like a sister that you never had, and you would always relay that message to her whenever you got the chance to, which she would always respond with;

“We are sisters you goofball! We’re family.”

Another Saturday morning rolls by and you’re excited that Spring Break was finally here. You looked at your calendar and it amazed you just how much time had passed since you moved into the dorm, nearly a whole year from today. You recall moments from when you moved in during the spring. Moments popped in your head, like you meeting Vicky, Heeseung, and some of his closest friends, such as Jake.

It felt like it all went through in a blink of an eye. Vicky’s transfer happened only five months ago, yet it felt longer than that. You found it so strange how time had an opposing effect when it came to the experiences you gained through it.

You reach over to your desk and started going through the unread mail you picked up yesterday, seeing an envelope from Vicky got you excited as you tore it open quickly revealing an adorable postcard. It was a photo of her and the young man she had been dating, Sunghoon was his name, and he seem like such a nice man. You recall the first time you got to speak to him, when Vicky would invite him to sit next to her so he could participate in your facetime calls with her.

He was very soft and respectful; he always had this twinkle in his eye reflecting pure joy whenever he would stare at Vicky. You could tell he was a perfect match for her, and looked forward to the day when you can meet him in person and see Vicky again.

Taking a moment to review the postcard, the photo was of Vicky and Sunghoon during their visit to Africa on a safari trip. You chuckled at seeing Sunghoon and Vicky in a tight embrace with the fantastic view of wildlife in the behind them. You turn it over to read Vicky’s note on the back.

“Sis! I’m getting married! Right after college of course, but since we’re starting our second year already, the next two are going to go by even faster, so, we can’t waste time. I want to see you and the girls soon! Let’s all come up with a date for you guys to come visit me and Sunghoon next month. I’ll message in the group chat when I get back. Can’t wait to see everyone!

PS: Before your bring Ethan, take him clothes shopping first.”

“Married? Wow.” You remarked aloud to yourself, but not without a smile presently stationed on your face. It will be so nice to see her and meet Sunghoon, especially after receiving the news, and you couldn’t wait to tell the girls.

You pin the postcard on the corkboard in front of your desk, placing it in between the photos of your mom and dad, your elder siblings, the girls, and of course, you and Heeseung. You even had a photo of Emily and Jake pinned up.

Vicky’s departure to a new college wasn’t the only significant event that had transpired five months ago, it was also marked the length of time that you and Heeseung had been together.

Your bond with him grew even closer. With all the number of dates and quality time spent in your respective dorms, you both had become inseparable. Not to mention the evening routines that took place, nearly every single night. Even though you and Samuel had dated for 8 months, sharing many intimate moments, it didn’t compare to the countless sessions that you and Heeseung had.

Sometimes multiple times in one day, which made you quickly found out that your body needed a period of adjustment when you recall feeling the soreness from all the action.

You brush your teeth and think about your nights with Heeseungm they all played out the same for the most part.

You think about how he can’t manage to keep his hands off you and always sets the mood by lightly brushing his fingers on a random part of your body, whether it was your arms, legs, hands, or chest.

The brush of his touch was always accompanied by a gushing breath he would release close to your ear, hearing just a sliver of his voice within it, and expressing his desire and triggering yours.

The way his hands roamed, and how his hair nested against your cheek as he dug his face into the nook of your neck, sucking, kissing, biting, and licking the sensitive skin until it became marked by his act. His nose would graze your temple as he would whisper in your ear, as he gave soft rose-petal kisses in between. The tickling of it was paired with a sexually appeasing sensation to your body, whenever you felt the tapping of his lips or the heat of his whispers rushing into your ear.

Playing out the performance in your head made you recall a moment where you had learned something very interesting about Heeseung’s sexual nature. It had the same effect of Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde, a doubling entity that emerged from within him depending on the sexual mood he was in. They reflected two sides to his performance in sex.

They both still classfieid as “fucking”, yet there was a difference in the type and the degree of his nature.

One side was his gentler one, the Dr. Jekyl entity. It was the persona of his sexual nature where he still maintained dominance, but he would allow you to have some unit of control. This part of him was a lot more tame and less animalistic, and it allowed you to have enough stability in your body and mind to move and think. It was his way of permitting you the freedom to do things to him, such as holding on to his wrists when you would kiss his most sensitive areas like his neck or ears. You would do your best to pin them down long enough, but he would overpower you every single time as he resisted the urge to lay still once, he felt your kisses.

Still, you would at least get a few seconds of seeing him vulnerable as you put up a fight in holding him down, and that was something you could only get away with due his nature reflecting Jekyl.

There were other examples of his permissive freedom, such as, when he would let you make the first move and allotted you to do so at your own pace. It normally would begin with him lying flat on his back, his hands behind his head as his elbows bent out to the sides, and his hat traditionally covering the significant features of his face. He would remain still letting you straddle him as you removed your shirt, which would always be the last remaining piece of clothing you had on prior to sitting on top of him, or a dress even.

He would deeply admire your how your body would flex and tone up as you lifted the cloth and raised it high, your arms crossed above your face as you turned off to the side with your hair flowing all around you. His will would break the very moment you dragged the cloth upwards, slowly revealing every measurement of skin as the regions of your body are revealed in order, belly button first, then breasts, collar bone, and shoulders last.

Your neck and face would return to frontal view as you swipe the clothing over, the collected strands of your hair grouped up through the loophole of the cloth would fall and dangle over your breasts, waist, and hips, each strand trickling down the farther you pull the material off and away from your body, generating a waterfall effect.

Lastly, and the most significant note to this side of Heeseung, was giving you total control of the main aspects that play a vital role regarding passionate sex, the tone, rhythm, and speed.

The three categories that often times, men strive to control. Heeseung wasn’t an exception having that strive, he loved being in control. However, he also loved experiencing the way you love him, emotionally and physically, and he could only witness it by letting you have some of it.

Once you removed your shirt, you’d reach down and gently stroke him, maintaining eye contact. A desire within you wanted to feel him in both your hands, before having him enter. Something about memorizing the thickness, length, and smoothness of his shaft, helped ease the process as you guide him inside and begin riding him.

The part he loved most about this was when he watches the sexual expression on your face. He always stared, and admired the way your beautiful face would display the initial sense of shock and pain upon you inserting him, doing everything by your own bidding. He loved watching you do it to yourself. The way that your mouth would gasp open and your brows furrowing in pain the moment you would tear yourself open by fitting him in, your face flinching as you felt the bite of his sting.

You moved passionately, slowly, and steadily as your hips would vibrate once his dick was fully inside you. Your walls are reintroduced to the throbbing numbness when you feel him rubbing against the flesh as you move him in and out.

The softness of his skin and the protrusion of veins creates a wild combination of smoothness and friction each time your hips dipped low, pushing him in, then roll back, pulling him out, all repeating in a cycle that becomes more vibrant as you keep it rotating. Your hips sway back and forth gently, while dipping into him hard and deep.

The weight of your body drops in mid wave, pulling you down and sealing every mesh of space that remained in between you two, as you begin to surpass the pain and sink into a pool of ultimate pleasure, wanting to feel every single part of him fill you.

You would feel him twitch inside, hinting to you that it was becoming harder for Heeseung to suppress the beast within him. Remaining in the same position as he did from the moment you straddled him, you’d watch him testing his willpower by refraining any movement, not even his hands. You keep riding him, watching as he stayed committed in laying there, and took every motion your hips were performing on him as your rotation of dipping, lifting, and rolling, keeps going.

Your body would gradually pick up speed, just a little, as your walls drooled all over him, making it easier for you to slide him in and out. The rush of ecstasy takes over your mind, body, and soul as you reach up with both hands, collecting your hair and pinning it up while you perform your moves, the loose strands surrounding your face and falling from your hands piece by piece as you begin bouncing up and down.

Once he felt you both were drawing close to orgasm, he marked his que and draws the line. Being so close to the finish line, this is the moment where Heeseung takes over.

“Fuck baby…” He bites his lip as he grunts. His low voice would go slightly higher in pitch during the times when he let you fuck his Jekyl side.

With a jerk of his hips thrusting into you, simultaneously removing his hands from his under head, he grabs around the smallest part of your waistline. He pulls you down as he continues to jerk up, and within one or two hard thrusts, he regains altitude as a swarm of adrenaline infuses him with the energy to fucks into you. You feel the strength of his thrusts pushing the both of you over the edge, beyond just pleasure.

“My fucking beautiful girl…fuck…keep riding it baby. Fucking take it.” His groans fuel you to keep moving and taking him in. Then, at the peak of his momentum, you feel him jam into you one last time, holding you in place as he lets his cock throb inside your walls, cumming inside you.

It shoots out fast and strong at first, then gradually comes to a slow stream of release as his twitching slowly decreases. You feel your walls press against him, squeezing everything out of him. The repeated action of your flesh re-clenching slurps every bit of his cum, vacuuming it deeper into you as the sharpness of the tingle and numbness overtrumps the height of Mount Everest, making you scream.

Your hips jolt each time his dick twitches, pairing in sync. His hand roams up to your back and he pulls you in to lay atop his chest, kissing his own breaths into you as your chest tightens against his, breathing into each other as you slowly regain your energy.

This was the side that you had seen most of, nearly a hundred percent of the time.