#he comes out of there smelling like herbs but the soup is so unfortunately ruined

[sisaloofafump]

Neither of them ever live it down (more mini bat here and here)

[lookingformoondrop]

could i request a boyfriend!andrew graves x reader headcannons or scenarios? i LOVE TCOAAL🫶🫶

Boyfriend! Andrew Graves x Reader - Headcanons

TW: Andy has a foul mouth, reader gets groped, Andy is a little possessive, a tiny bit of violence (-is always the answer)

♥︎Notes: I'm kind of an idiot so if you notice something is spelled incorrectly, feel free to send me a dm so i can fix it (totally not at all referring to my first Yandere!Andy x Reader post where I spelled dark as darmfk ;-;). Also this is kind of short because so many people requested for Andy x Reader, so I didn't want to pull out all the stops. I hope this meets your expectations <3.♥︎

The first thing you gotta to know about dating Andy, is that he's very touch starved.

I can just headcanon that due to his aloof personality and very broody behavior, he doesn't get many hugs...

So when you enter his life, best believe that Andy shows you this completely different side of him!

I'm talking.... Cuddling in the mornings till the point where you're almost late for work because he refuses to let you go.

I'm talking.... Andy being able to sense when you're about to go into the shower. His spidey-senses tingles, and the moment you're about to hop in, he's right there already getting his hair wet.

I'm talking.... Trapping you with his kisses when you're making food, definitely not noticing that he's causing you to burn dinner.

And no amount of protest can deter this man either.

Speaking of making food... Andrew is the master-chef of the house!

Now he's no Gorden Ramsey (as he likes to tell you whenever he makes you a sandwich), but everyone knows that one bite of his food is enough to make a sailor come back to the land.

So it's very nifty when you're sick and at home, in need to have someone take care of you.

The first time you ever got sick was when you and Andy were still living separately.

It was a Friday night, and it was supposed to be your 1-year anniversary with Andy. Unfortunately, due to some unhygienic biotch at the office, you caught a cold and had to cancel.

At first Andy didn't respond, instead leaving you on read. You felt bad, figuring that he was mad at you for canceling.

But lo' and behold, exactly 10 minutes later, that was a frantic sound of keys jiggling into the your front door.

You had gotten up from your couch-potato position to see the person who wanted to rush into your home so badly, when it occurred to you;

Andrew is the only one with another set of keys...

And with that realization, Andy burst through the door with a pharmacy store bag in one hand, and a grocery store bag in another.

In an instant, Andy made you take a disgusting amount of cold medicine, and blessed your cold home with the warmth and smell of spices and herbs (likely all from the soup).

When the food was ready, he sat you up with a pillow and hand-fed you soup for the rest of the night. You felt so bad for ruining your anniversary, but everytime you tried to apologize for it, Andrew would stuff your mouth with more soup and would say;

"I don't care about that romance and anniversary shit. We don't need to go to a fancy restaurant or an expensive place just to feel like we're honoring an important date. That date is important because it is our date. We don't need to one-up that memorable time just to remind everyone of how special it is... Y/N, you're crying into the soup."

Needless to say, you cried.

But Andrew doesn't just take care of you...You best believe he also protects.

Well, sorta.

You could be in a grocery store, at a Boba shop, in the mall, getting new shoes, it wouldn't matter, Andrew would always have his hand on your waist.

Be it because he saw someone look at you, doesn't matter who or how old they are, he'll always wrap his arms around you and whisper ever so softly, "You're mine..."

It has definitely given you some weird looks over the years, but you know he means well.

And if anyone ever actually looks at you funny? It's over for them.

Andrew will make it VERY clear that you're not to be messed with.

For example, a couple of months into your relationship, you were riding the train. Enjoying a simple conversation about suspicious neighbors and whatnot, when all of the sudden some guy came up behind you and tried groping you discreetly.

Andy noticed very quickly that all the blood drained from your face. He looked behind you and noticed the old geezer trying to get a hand full of someone way younger than them, and Andrew could feel every restraint in his body snap.

In an act of "self-defense" as told to the cops later on, Andrew punched the living daylights of the guy and sent him flying into a pole.

You fussed over Andy's fist for awhile, completely forgetting about how you felt. But the only thing Andy could think about was how he should've hit that guy harder.

When you guys were finally walking home, hand in hand, you leaned on Andrew.

"I'm sorry about today Andy... I didn't mean for you to get all banged up."

Andrew snorted, "My knuckle is a little scratched up, so what? That perverted asshole had it coming for him."

You kissed Andy's cheek, which granted you a dark blush from Andy, and a grin from you.

"Thank you Aaandy~" You brushed his hand with your thumb,

Being in a relationship with Andy is a little messy, and yes sometimes a little crazy. But no matter what happens, Andy will always stick by your side.

"You're welcome, sweetheart." Andy squeezed your hand in return.

Thank you for the ask<3

[sif-the-tsunami]

What about Geralt getting "cursed" by some witch that took offence to him not accepting her advances so she makes him get a boner for the next person that talks to him and only that person can alleviate it. Such as the unfortunate new bar maid at the tavern that he visits for a quick bite of dinner. 😏

Have fun! 😘

-🍑

I'm so excited for this! You come up with some really fantastic ideas! I hope you love this one as much as I do, I wanted it to be extra special just for you.

Warnings: Smutty McSmut Smut, vaginal and oral. Male masturbation. There will be some sassing and in Witcher canon, Geralt is nearly assaulted by women who view Witchers as sexual novelties. In the show, Geralt is fetishized. So I want to play off of that. If this triggers you, I don’t want to ruin your day with a short story, so please take care of yourself and I will definitely post more Geralt fluff another day. I’m sorry, and I do care about your wellbeing. 

Geralt caught himself muttering under his breath. He was miserable after fulfilling yet another contract. While there were always someone who needed something from him, the wild witches were always the worst. The Witcher only wanted to be paid in gold coins or valuable goods. Sex was not an acceptable form of currency. And while Geralt generally enjoys the company of women, even paid for the pleasure of some women’s company, he doesn’t enjoy when things are demanded of him. The witch of the woods, instead of paying him with ingredients or coinage, placed a lust enchantment on the White Wolf when he declined her initial offer of the use of her body. He was polite about it as possible, but being told no made her sneer at him with malice. 

While the Wolf wasn’t entirely sure about what the parameters of the enchantment entailed, he could feel a dull, gradually increasing ache that was going to become unbearable. Geralt hadn’t caught the entire spell she cast, or he would be able to address the nature of the hex before it became too inconvenient for him. He was entirely grumpy by the time he made it to his rented room at the tavern.

Geralt was beginning to feel feral. An unnatural urge was beginning to take over him, he kicked his boots off and pealed off his skin tight britches. In one of the pouches in his packs, he carried with him a small vial of oil that smelled vaguely of herbs and musk. He applied a decent amount onto his palm, then started to massage and manhandle himself. He coaxed an orgasm out of himself quickly, like one is apt to do by themselves. The peace that it brought was short-lived unfortunately. A few moments after he cleaned himself up, he observed his growing discomfort. With another application of the oil, Geralt laid back on the bed and thought of Yennifer.

However this time took considerably longer. He was not thrilled by how long he was laid up, but the pleasure took him and made him comfortably numb for a few moments. He remained in his bed feeling vaguely lonely. He got himself dressed and walked down to the tavern. He was becoming irate and thought that some ale might give him a different kind of relief. He was thankful for the fullness of his cloak that evening, he kept himself covered awkwardly.

Once he arrived at the bar to order his drink, perhaps some dinner, he met a sweet young woman who smiled at him. It was rare for people to treat him like he was anything other than a freak or a novelty. His soul yearned for someone who wanted to be around him because they simply enjoyed his company. Jaskier, gods love him, sometimes seemed to want to be around Geralt for the songs he could write, like he had monetized their friendship. But the woman who brought him his beverage didn’t ooh and ahh at his profession, she didn’t gape at him or even complain that he smells like monster blood. She was friendly to him in a way he wasn’t prepared for, she made him feel like he was welcome and wanted there. 

She brought him a soup with beef and leeks, and loaf of dark brown bread with some fresh butter. She smiled at him, and Geralt felt himself blush a little. The White Wolf watched her interactions with other patrons. It was interesting to him see that she wasn’t as warm with some of them. After having interacted with her more than once, he felt a inkling that perhaps her kindness was more than just regular hospitality. 

She stopped by his perch a few more times and offered to bring him more bread to finish mopping up the broth. Some of the men in the tavern would get a little handsy or snarky with the woman, she seemed to be able to blow off whatever kind of attitude that was thrown her way effortlessly. It was amusing to watch her. the action of the tavern slowly brought itself to a close and the patrons left to their homes. Before long the distant rumble of thunder and the down pour of rain came in though the windows.

Geralt watched the young woman sigh deeply. “My lady, you seem to be distressed.”

“It will just be a long, cold, walk to my cottage. I don’t look forward to making the trek.”

“I could walk with you, or let you ride on my horse if you would prefer not to get muddy.” The witcher offered.

“That is very kind of you, but I don’t want to be a burden on you. Besides, I know the inn keeper, I can take a quiet corner to sleep in here.”

“I have a room here, it would be warmer and considerably more comfortable than a corner. I promise that I will be nothing but respectful, I can sleep on the floor myself. I’m used to sleeping in places far less luxurious.”

The two talked while she cleaned up. Geralt kept his cloak covering himself as the woman grabbed a bottle and two small cups. All it took was half a bottle for the young woman to end up sitting in the Witcher’s lap. By the time it was empty, she was kissing the white haired man aggressively. 

Geralt worried about what would happen if he told her about the curse he was under, but the man needed with his whole body to feel her against him. There was nothing else on the Continent that he wanted more was the girl sitting on his lap, damn near grinding against him. The woman pulled her skirts up around her hips and was practically whimpering for him to return her advances. At first he slid a hand between her legs to help her get ready for what they both wanted.

Without too much exertion, Geralt lifted the barmaid up with him and set her on the bed in his room. Kneeling between her thighs, putting one of her legs over his shoulder to get deeper, he dove head first into her secret garden. The woman in his bed moaned and gasped his name as he brought waves of pleasure. Geralt watched as her body writhed.

“Are you ready? Are you ready for me, sweetness?” The Witcher asked raising himself up, sliding his pants down his hips.

The beautiful woman in his bed nodded, gasping. The White Wolf slid himself into her, sensually. He pumped himself into his willing conquest. She ripped at his shirt and clawed at him like a wild animal. Soon their bodies peaked in pleasure, he yelled as he emptied himself inside of her. They lay together on the bed, tangled in her skirts and each other’s limbs. 

“You should teach lessons, Geralt. Charge a gold coin for every student.” The barmaid said, causing the large man to chuckle. Getting a laugh out of the Wolf was never an easy feat, however, he found that joy seemed to radiate from his bedmate. Being relaxed with her was as easy as breathing, but he knew this would not and could not last. She deserved a man who would be content with hunting game for her table, collecting wood for her fire, and not feel the constrictions of domesticity. While Geralt dreamed of being able to have that kind of life one day, he knew that he was too damaged inside to give it to her. He had been too lonely for too long.

“I don’t think most men have a Witcher’s stamina, although, I would feel bad for most women if they did. The men in most places don’t know there own ass from a hole in the ground.”

“Here, help me out of this dress, lets get comfortable.”

The two of them reveled in their passions a few more times that night. While she wasn't exactly insatiable, he felt like she was easily out pace him. One of the benefits of youth, he mused. When he woke up the next morning, the young woman was singing as she brushed her hair out. 

“Cast not your eyes upon him, lest he kiss you with his sword Lay not your heart against him or your lips to ease his roar For the song of the White Wolf will always be sung alone”

It was gently and soft. Just to amuse herself more than him. But her voice was clear like a bell. “I’m sorry Witcher, I didn’t mean to wake you. I just had it stuck in my head this morning when the sun came through the window. I had wanted to be out of your hair before you had woken up. Didn’t want to overstay my welcome.”

“I wouldn’t have kicked you out either way. But I am familiar with what happens to the women who have been found sneaking out of my room in the morning.”

“Were this a perfect world, I would make you a breakfast with honey cakes, sausage, maybe hot chocolate. You deserve someone who would take care of you, Geralt,” she said, coming up to him and touching his face. She placed a kiss on his forehead, tenderly. “You are a good man, rest while you can. You have monsters you still have to slay.”

Geralt drifted back to sleep for a while, unaware that her earnest desire for him to be happy broke the enchantment that had been plaguing him from the day before. Some times, all it takes is a simple kiss to lift a curse.