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ritz-writes · 8 months

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@asleepyy so sorry for tagging u twice in one day and i hope im not bothering u with my brain rot 😅

but yes, i did actually dissect the lyrics. yes, i am actually insane. and yes, i love this au quite a lot.

here are my notes and what i think each song represents, tho its mainly just the vibes i get. i made notes as i listened to them (note: i see songs almost always in animatic form. idk if that will effect how i imagine what each song means, but i thought it might be worth mentioning)

join me as i lose my mind over the course of an hour and a half

say what you think: def making me think of them both in heaven and jophiel wanting to ask questions.

running up that hill: AHH this one hurt. very obvious as well. jophiel seeing that azazel shouldnt be a demon. "And if I only could I'd make a deal with God, and I'd get Him to swap our places." i am sobbingggg

what difference does it make?: at first i was going to say its jophiel wanting to figure out what went wrong but azazel makes them promise not to, but i think its better suited for azazel understanding hes a demon, but he cant help but still have faith in the almighty

please please please let me get what i want: fuckkk is this about azazel being a demon but still wanting to do good 😭 short but still painful

ever fallen in love (with someone you shouldn't've): my first reaction to the title alone was like the second image of the kambucha girl meme. anyway i think this one is about them becoming friends (or more?? 👀) but knowing its seen as wrong. "And if I start a commotion, I run the risk of losing you and that's worse" makes me also think of jophiel talking to the metatron and realizing he shouldnt ask about azazel lest he risk the poor thing being smited.

nothing critical: ohhhh this one gives hella vibes of jophiel not trusting heaven and knowing "something isnt right here" in regards to the fall-- HOLD UP "I know, someone had to go, If not him it'd be me instead" HELLO??? aziraphale asking for jophiel??? is this like after he finds out what azazels name used to be??

flowers never bend with the rainfall: hmm... i feel like this is a plot point song. not sure why. but "And I hide behind the shield of my illusion" makes me think it pertains to azazel

bird in space: oh this ones a bit tricky. i think ive reached the songs that no longer fit the lore we've been given thus far. so the only thing i can think rn is jophiel enjoying earthly pleasures? not rlly sure

angel, won't you call me?: oh fuckkk is this about a fight they have? "I fled at the face of my rival. When I felt his breath at the back of my neck. Angel, won't you call?" theres no way that isnt about azazel saying smth and then leaving, only to be scared he severed his tie to the only person thats been nice to him.

the stranger: first of this is a bop and im loving it. very groovy. the first thing that comes to mind is the "choose your faces wisely" prophecy. ooo is this about jophiel trying to convince azazel hes still meant to be an angel? that he wasnt meant to fall? also, the last verse is sticking out to me... not sure why

all i think about now: fuckkkkk this is giving me the vibes of jophiel finding out azazel Fell cuz of him and feeling guilty about it. "If I'm late, can I thank you now?" FUCKING OW?? oh yeah for sure this is about jophiel finding out and being sucker punched with guilt

ill be your mirror: oh goddd this song. i know crowley listens to this song but i cant remember what its about so lets see. AH SHIT YEAH THATS RIGHT. okay so jophiel reminds azazel that he is inherently good, regardless of if hes a demon. thats what im getting from this (also just tihnking of that ask i sent about the reflective sunglasses bthwjegkrw)

me and my husband: okay all im getting from this is "they r down bad". they r very very very much in love. getting vibes of this being after they stop the apocolypse. or maybe their feelings developing thru the centuries

time in a bottle: oh man this song always gets me. okay so, this and the last song r giving the oh-shit-i-might-be-in-love vibes. but this one is with jophiel's pov, while me and my husband is azazel's

ritz note: the last couple songs have been cute and lovey and i am now terrified of what the next ones r gonna be. cuz i know this fandom. and i am not ready for the pain. i am afraidddd

lonesome town: i fucking called it i knew the happy wouldnt last 😭😭 they had a fight didnt they. yeahhh they had a fight. FUCK why is this so sad but so pretty

across the universe: is this one sad too??? hang on theres a bit thats not in english, what does that mean... "Hail to the Heavenly Teacher." okay so i assume this is an azazel song. this is just making me think of the bookshop fire, but its azazel thinking jophiel died 😭 ....i am staring at the lyircs. i am glaring at the lyrics. this song MEANS something. i just dont know what. but its important. im squinting at it very hard (note: i came back to this song and am STILL glaring at it. its like. its like im seeing it covered in sand but i know theres gold underneath. i cant SEE the gold, but i know its there. this is driving me nuts /pos)

no wonder i: hm.. im not rlly sure with this one. OH?? is this azazel finding out heaven isnt that good?? "Suddenly I'm not so sure. That intentions can be pure." hmmmmmmm

what do they know?: holy shit okay this is a completely different kind of song than the others. im.... glaring at these lyrics too. feels like a plot point but cant tell what it is. i think its about jophiel? maybe heaven too?? idk im grasping at straws with this one

sea of love: oh yay a happy song again 😌 okay this is just short and sweet. gives me forgiveness and/or confession vibes.

who are you, really?: this one sounds important and i am glaring!! makes me think of "we dont need heaven we dont need hell" and also "a demon/angel that goes along with hell/heaven as far as he can". also just makes me think of jophiel speaking.

the moon will sing: i fucking love this song but i dont think ive ever looked at the lyrics so lets goooo. right away i see "I could have been anyone, anyone else. Before you made the choice for me" and think of aziraphale asking and falling for jophiel, and in a way making the choice of jophiel staying an angel. "Instead, I made a bed with apathy" jophiel trying not to care about a random demon. "I shine only with the light you gave me" jophiel giving azazel ideas on how to do "good" while being "bad". also with that line, thinking of azazel saying that to god and being sad about having fallen AUGHH i have a whole animatic in my head with this song and im losing my mind

matephor: hnnnn another important sounding song. jophiel vibes. fight song perhaps?? "Don't look too hard 'cause you won't like the scars he left in me" azazel vibes??? this one is elusive to me but i love it. okay im slowly getting more azazel vibes. like azazel trying to convince jophiel that he is a demon and fell for a reason

providence: right away getting "heaven and hell r bad" vibes. OHH okay okay this is giving me hella jophiel vibes, but specificly snarky and sassy jophiel vibes. of being like "oh yes heaven is oh so great, we kill children! but its for the greater good, of course. gotta beat hell and all that, even at the cost of innocents. all for the almighty and her ineffable plan." (this song is a bop omg)

earth angel: oh i know this one but only with crowley and aziraphale, so im excited to listen to it with an oopsie omens mind set. omg wait why does it hit HARDER. love sick azazel is such a cute image 🥺🥰

what more can i do: hmm.. them being in love but knowing its "forbidden"? cant tell who i imagine with it more

starman: this is just them. classic good omens song, regardless of the au. love to see it 💖

a pearl: AH FUCK ANOTHER SAD ONE. mitski whyy. hm.. azazel song? jophiel?? i think jophiel... tho my mind might be turning to mush at this point so im not sure. one of them is sad

duvet: oh def azazel vibes. oh maybe some jophiel vibes too?? i can see it swaping povs. i think it fits azazel more tho.

ritz note: OKAY the next song is in a different language and for a split second i legit thought i was having a stroke when i pulled up the lyrics ngl bgkewrrkjq

différent de toi: no idea what this song is about but its pretty 😊

oh thats all of them! i think the first half is more coherent observations, while the second half is just... rambling a bit lmao. idk if any of this makes sense. i might also be looking for things that arent there with these songs, but oh well. this was fun!

and now, after looking back at them all, i really does just slowly derail near the end lmao

#kinda hesitant to post this #but i think i put too much work into it not to so #here we go <3 #good omens #good omens au #ritz rambles #long post

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vulpixisananimal · 15 days

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SIFSTEM PLAYLIST

I got a few suggestions from people, and I have explinations for a lot of the music too BECASUE IM A HUGE MUSIC NERD!!! Below the cut!!

ALSO I'm gonna add more songs over time and will probably update this. Lol. I'm ALWAYS taking suggestions for it! I like music!!!

PLAYLIST ORDER

Each section for the Sifstem members is designated by an ISAT origonal song, and in each section is song for that member! There's two exceptions which I'll go over real quick!

Your fault/Last Midnight - First song on the playlist, it's about basicly all the members. It's about a bunch of characters arguing about who's fault it is that everything's gone to shit before blaming it on the witch. And then in Last Midnight the witch goes off on them about it doesn't matter who's to blame, they have to deal with it.

It takes two - Last song on the playlist. Also from Into the Woods, this, by contrast, is about how people change and work together well.

Also some songs I choose off lyrics, others off of just vibes.

NOW FOR THE SECTIONS

Siffrin

Final room (act 5/6) - If there was a good Siffrin theme from ISAT, I think this is it. I like it.

Russian Doll - "Why should I try again?" This was a song reccomended to me a while ago actually, it fits.

Touch - ok this one's a bit mean but, listen, he is so touch starved. This song fits. "Touch, I remember touch, feelings came with touch."

No dogs on the moon! - vibe song! Silly fella song!

Bohemian Rhapsody - one of my favorite songs of all time ever. There's too much to type out, tbh.

Loop

How can you help me, Stardust? - do I even need to say anything?

Absolutely cuckoo - listen to the lyrics. "You might decide I'm a nut \ Give me a week or two to \ go absolutly cuckoo \ then when you see your error \ you can flee in terror" LIKE COME ON

The Future - "I'm worried about the future, ain't fucking with that past shit." Loop is really trying to move on. How could they? They're stuck in their betters shadow, their mind.

A humans touch - this one was by @\jackoboltrades! Very fitting for Loop who still feels they don't deserve love, or that they're just a star, not human, not real.

Rage Awakened - based purely on the loop fight. It's a vibe song but I love this song. Also Lingering Will (the character this theme is for) does have some similarities to Loop, being echoes of the past defeats and wishes.

Haunted - being haunted by past mistakes or just the past in general. Though it has some romantic undertones that I can take or leave

Mal Du Pays

Mal Du Pays - AGAIN do I need to explain anything

Mr. FEAR - "Hello, my name is mr. fear." considering how Mal Du Pays is introduced and how it interacts with Siffrin, well, that line alone makes it an MDP song.

Dark Impetus - Vibe song! Mysterious figure cloaked in dark, too. Lol.

Ghosts - "Maybe the past aint what it cracked up to be \ Maybe I'll find a way to just move on \ Maybe we're all ghosts cause I cant feel the ground \ And all these shades they dont make a sound \ I think there is a God \ I think he hates his job" Do I need to say anything.

Stained, Brutal Calamity - Recomended by a friend! Both vibes but also the lyrics that come later have a MDP vibe. I like it.

Burn My Dread (last battle) - "Tear up your fear \ the end is coming near" Honestly Persona 3 has a vibe that could fit MDP quite well.

Null

I WON'T LET YOU GO HOME - Act 5 Siffrin, someone who's both repressing their own feelings to their family but also doesn't want to let them go, to the point of hurting everyone. Nuff said.

Panoramic Feeling - this and the other Katana Zero songs are here cause, well, Zero fictive, plus has the vibe.

All for now - same song used to fight Ramos. It was this or Full Confession, and this fits more for it's desperate or crazed vibe.

L'impeto Oscuro - This is actually a retrain of Dark Impetus, it's the them of a time traveler who can stop time (Kingdom hearts lore dont worry about it.) This specific mix also included the music for when time is stopped during the fight. It's ruthless, endless.

I'm my own master now - Very heavy and hard and strong and powerful, also! The Lyrics! "Bear the mark of my scars \ Shedding blood underneath the stars"

Labyrinth - Being lost in an endless labarynth of their own mind. Very much like act 5 Siffrin, like Null. Plus, Null is not exactly mentally stable.

Rain on brick - Katana Zero song, it's the menue theme. It's just. . . Vibes.

#heho #isat siffrin #isat mal du pays #isat loop #isat null #isat #isat spoilers #in stars and time #siffrin system au #sifstem

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starheirxero · 1 month

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I'M BACK- I WAS GONE FOR A HOT SECOND, BUT YOU AINT GONNA GET RID OF ME THAT EASILY-

Not gonna lie, I was waiting for shit to hit the fan, until I was gonna go on a rant- This maaay not have been the best idea-

THERE'S SO MUCH GOING ON NOW- I AM EMOTIONAL ABOUT IT- I AM IN LOVE, I AM IN SHAMBLES- I WANT THIS SHOW TO RIP MY HEART OUT AND STOMP ON IT-

God, I am so intrigued to see where this is going! The character arcs get better day by day!

First of all, there's Eclipse- He keeps dissappearing for rather long periods of time, and anytime he comes back, he is just a little bit different. A little more docile, a little more half-hearted in his rudeness. A little more compassionate to help.

He's changing, becoming better, while still being Eclipse. All because he was shown a little kindness. All because there is someone who won't give up on him. Someone, who's love and care is unconditional, who looks beyond the surface, beyond snarky remarks and insults.

And God, Earth's words. It doesn't matter who he is, or will be. It doesn't matter, if he chooses to be Eclipse, or decides to rip this part of him apart and leave it behind. It doesn't matter, which name he will use, or what he'll look like. Because she sees him. He is the one who helped her, and who she bonded to. He's the one she cares for. There could be a day, where he decides, that he's not Eclipse. There could be a day, where he chooses a different name. She will have his back, because he's still the person she befriended.

The metaphors, the love. My heart….

But theres also the parallel to Moon. Because Eclipse is everything bad to Moon. The uncaring villain. Yet now they are changing roles. Eclipse is starting to care, and he is helping, in his own cryptic way. Meanwhile, Moon is slowly loosing it, becoming even more hostile and aggressive compared to old Moon.

Moon's descent is so tragic.

Moon is the big brother, the family's protector.

His love for his family is part of his system's very core.

When he beat Eclipse, he swore to protect them with his life.

His family is his purpose. The machine inside of him, begging for a task, has found purpose in keeping harm away, in keeping them safe and sound.

He is constantly focusing on making sure they're fine, obsessing over it, worrying beyond belief.

And now Solar is dead. His brother, a part of his family, is gone.

Moon failed his purpose. He failed in protecting his loved one. And he's driving himself insane over it, trying desperately to reverse it.

He hallucinates, afraid of loosing the rest of them.

He keeps belittling himself, comparing himself to old Moon.

Because he failed. But he will not fail again. He will bring Solar back, even if it's the last thing he does.

And he keeps his family oblivious. They cannot know, they don't need to. They'd try to stop him, and Moon cant allow it. Plus, ignorance is bliss. He will bring their brother back. In the meantime, he just needs to keep his siblings safe and sound, out of harm's way.

But he's also hurting them. Sun is worried. He knows his twin better than anyone, and knows something is wrong.

And Earth, oh Earth… She's now doubting not just herself, but others as well.

Moon is affecting his loved ones without realizing it.

And of course, there's Bloodmoon. Bloodmoon, who apologized to his brother, for not saving him. Bloodmoon, who ripped a bomb from his head, not caring about the pain.

Bloodmoon, who now has to refer to himself as "I" instead of "we".

He is so lost without his brother. He depended on him, always being guided. And now he's alone, and lost.

All he can think about now is revenge, even going to Ruin for help…

THEY MAKE ME SO I'LL, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM/silly-

-Stardust

I KNOWWWW THE SHOWS HAVE JUST BEEN BACK-TO-BACK PUTTING OUT VIDEOS TO BLAST ME ACROSS THE ROOM ITS SO HSKABDKSND,D

ECLIPSE'S WHOLE DEAL YESYESYES!!!! Oh my stars everything with him has been soso exciting to me I can't EVENNN!!! AND WITH EARTH AUGHHH DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED I'M SO EMOTIONAL ABOUT THEIR DYNAMICCC 😭 EXACTLY AS YOU PUT IT. The metaphors the love... the themes the messages!!!! EXPLODES.

AND THE PARALLELS WITH MOON OMS THAT DIDN'T EVEN OCCUR TO ME. THEY'RE SWITCHING ROLES..... I'm almost positive you can tie that to like, What Made Them act the way they are too yk. Smth about how loss(of identity, of a family member) makes them bitter and angry and cruel but even just the slightest bit of care and love(from a brother, from an unlikely friend) can switch things up...

OR SOMETHING I'm saying I See Your Vision and I'm so. AUGH. Everything with him lately has been so many layers of devastating :( This family is in got dayum SHAMBLES right now!! 😭

AND BLOODMOON I KNOWWWW I KNOW I HE'S BEEN BREAKING MY HEART LATELY. Watching him correct his "we" to "i" genuinely had me on the FLOOR. AND YEAH NOW HE'S ALSO HELLBENT BY HIS OWN GRIEF AND HE'S BACK WITH RUIN AND I'M AUAAHAGGAFGGGFRRRAAAA EXPLODES FOR 1 MILLION YEARS

#asks #anon #stardust anon #THIS FUCKING SHOW DUDE HOLY SHIT.#THINGS HAVE BEEN PICKING UP LATELY AND ITS KILLING ME DHSJDHAJDNS #SOMETHING BIG IS COMING I CAN FEEL IT AND I'M SO NERVOUS DHSJDHSJD #sun and moon show #the sun and moon show #tsams #lunar and earth show #the lunar and earth show #tlaes #long post

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onskepa · 10 months

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Tsyeytsyip

HELLOOOOOOOO EVERYONE! I have received two requests that were nearly identical so once again I have decided to combine them into one!

@rebellizards : It's me again! I requested neteyam x tiny!human!reader where she is smol and cute and he's big and tall. How I said, for her, Neteyam it's the size of Gulliver from Gulliver's Travels compared to the Liliputians. And she is half of his little finger (idk if i should call it pinky). I rly don't know what to choose, maybe he traps her in his hand or put her on his nose while he is lying down on the grass just for fun. Like, it'll be sooooo cute to see them, the mighty warrior playing with the little human girl. Of course she enjoys it too but she won't admit it

Kisses kisses

BIRTHDAY ANON: IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!

As my birthday present I wanna request you because, with all honesty in the world, you are my favourite writer and I love your work so much there are not enough words in this world so I can describe my love and appreciation for your work!

With other words:

I. Love. You.

Soooo I want a neteyam x human female reader who it's smoll. Like, I always liked the huge size difference between a giant and a human. I have a sick weakness about giants. One time I watched Gulliver's Travels and I. Got. Wet. Hell knows how but ehh.... Back to my request!

Neteyam x human female reader where reader is super smol, maybe half of his index finger and he traps her in his hand or let's her sleep under his chin or teases her. Like threathing to lay on top of her jut to see her adorable face filling with fear hehe.

Super Duper Cute

p.s.: i read "Hi'i" (idk if i wrote it well) and I love it sooooo much. It's perfect!

Thank you both for requesting, AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANON! I didn't want this one to be delayed even a day! So hope you all sit back, relax and enjoy this gift!

P.S: I have taken some inspiration from the movie "secret world of Arriety" such a good movie! XD

Little pouch

------------------------------------------------------------------------

[for reference, reader is 5 inches tall, not tiny for us humans but tiny for na'vi]

If one were to look at neteyam sully, as he talks to himself, people would think he is out of it. Or he could be talking through an earpiece but no. If you look carefully, there is something small sitting or standing on neteyam's shoulder or laying on top of his head.

What is the tiny thing?

Why that would be none other than Tsyeytsyip, or Tey for short. Tey is a small tiny human, smaller than a new born, smaller than anything tiny in the world of pandora. How she became like this is unknown, since she was born from a long line of small humans back on Earth, and the RDA hired her parents to work with them in working the smaller stuff.

But that was a long time ago. Now tey lives her best life in the massive giant world of pandora and the creature that inhabit the planet. Well as best as she can. Literally anything can kill her. Tey has a higher chance of being crushed by something than an average size human.

Which is why neteyam, even though no one asked him, has decided he would protect little bite. Every since they met, neteyam has been nothing but a tease to little bite.

You see, despite being so tiny, Tey has a bite, and she isn't afraid who to bite. Many will flinch from the sharp pain and leave her alone. But neteyam? he just laughs.

That is the thing with neteyam. He adores his good friend little bite, she is sweet, kind, yet oh so tiny. Neteyam cant help but tease his cute little friend. Yes, she will try to bite his finger off but he cant help it! She is too cute! So whenever they are together, neteyam wont let the day end without some cute reaction from little bite.

"neteyam for the last time GET YOUR STINKY ASS FOOT AWAY FROM ME!" little bite screamed at the top of her lungs. Angry and cant be taken seriously. little bite was glaring up at neteyam, who was having a fit of laughter.

"hahaha! I'm sorry tey, I cant help it" neteyam grins happily. Playfully, he would pretend to almost step on little bite and would feel a small poke or prick on her "little weapon". A toothpick.

"cant help my tiny ass! you do this to me all the time!! Using your big blue giant FEET to scare me! and if is not you trying to step on me, it would be your sharp teeth or your massive hands!" little bite huffs out. Neteyam grins as he picks up little bite onto his hand.

"You know I am only playing with you little bite, its just my way of teasing you. I would never hurt you, you're my cute little human" neteyam says while smiling innocently.

Being careful, he strokes little bite's cute face with adoration. Little bite blushed seeing how genuine neteyam is being. Placing her small hands on his finger, feeling his cool body temperature. Leaning her head on his finger, enjoying neteyam's 'embrace'.

"Well...try to tone it down. Every time you scare me, I feel as though my heart will explode" little bites says. She should be used to neteyam's tactics by now, but its hard when it looks like every movement will end her.

"I wont have that, your tiny heart is meant to beat for me" the giant blue boy smirks handsomely. Revealing his sharp fangs with the sunlight reflecting. Slightly pouting, little bite says "no, my heart beats for me to be alive". Neteyam chuckles, his vibrations sends little bite's mind wild. Why must neteyam be so good looking?

"if you are done laughing, I am starving! lets get a snack or something to eat" little bite says while rubbing her hands. "you are always hungry" neteyam comments. Placing her hands on her hips she looks up at him, "I am tiny, so my energy quickly goes down". Rolling his eyes, neteyam places little bite on his shoulder as he searches for some berries.

"during the mean time, we should also make new clothing for you" neteyam says. Little bite looks down at her outfits and it is starting to show wear and tear. Materials made for her outfits are not always the best materials to make clothes out of. Using grass, dried leaves, or scales of an animal.

"Bit tricky to find lasting items to make clothes out of" little bite replies. Finding a berry vine, neteyam gives little bite a single berry which looks like a large ball in her hands. "YES!" she shouts happily and munches away the juicy berry.

Neteyam sits down and collects some grass to make something while little bite eats. A comfortable silence was there between them.

It was like that for a while, when little bite was full she rubbed her belly in satisfaction. "phew! those were good berries" she says happily. "I can tell, your face is covered in berry juice" neteyam chuckles. Little bite touched her face, feeling the stickiness of the berry juice. "Can you take me to the pond near by?" she asks. Neteyam nods and carries her in his hand, being careful as usual. Reaching there, he gently puts her down. "Going to take a quick wash!" little bite says and goes to the stones that makes a tiny cave.

Neteyam nods and looks at the little waterfall. It is his favorite place. It is where his father taught him how to fish, relax, play around, and where he met his tiny friend. A special place he holds dear to his heart.

"When you are done, wear this" he places a tiny item near the little cave for little bite to take. He didn't had to wait long, Little bite came out from the rocks and fresh and clean and wearing the new outfit he made for her.

"Huh, this is very nice comfortable" little bite admires her new outfits. It was made with the petals of her favorite flower, the woven ends design as a flowy dress with its colors complementing her skin. Tied neatly with the flower vine and The texture of the petals are so soft and light, its easy for little bite to move around. Truly the best outfit she has had so far.

"Do you like it?" neteyam asks, a bit nervous and anxious to hear her response. Smiling happily, her bright eyes looking up at him, " I LOVE it! its perfect!" her bell like laughs rings in his ears, a pleasant sound he enjoys hearing. Little bite gives a twirl for him, the dress flowing lightly, giving her a soft look.

"I am glad you like it" neteyam replies. He lays down, letting the warmth of the son cover him like a blanket. Little bite climbs on top of him. Looking like a mountain in her eyes. She goes to his right eye and gently poke his eye lid. "Neteyam? are you gonna take a nap?" she asks. Neteyam smirks, "yeah, the sun feels good right now, we can head back later".

Little bite agrees and decides to lay on his nose as her napping spot. Since she hardly weight a thing, it wont cut off the air circulation for her blue friend. Letting sleepiness take over, both get a comfortable and sleep away through the warm afternoon sun.

Aaaaaaaaand that is all for this one! Happy birthday anon! I hope you enjoy this fic as my present to you. Enjoy~!! ^^

Tsyeytsyip = Tiny bite

#avatar #avatar the way of water #na'vi x reader #na'vi avatar #avatar 2 #na'vi x human #neteyam fluff #neteyam sully #neteyam x reader #neteyam #avatar neteyam #neteyam x human reader #neteyam x y/n #neteyam x you

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lover-of-mine · 10 months

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Your post about Buck needing to be the one who chooses got me thinking—it's not just that he's gotten into a bunch of relationships without really trying to initiate them, he's also needed his hand held through every single major milestone in those relationships. He was kinda shamed (lol) into asking Abby out on Valentine's Day, he needed Bobby to tell him to step in with her with her mom. When Taylor started acting weird, it didn't even seem to occur to him that something must be wrong—he just assumed that she was gonna leave him, and he literally had to be told by Bobby to at least talk things through with her. He would've never asked her to move in if not for the thing with Lucy. He wouldn't have attempted to reach out to Natalia again if she didn't come back. The only time I can think of him attempting to actually start something is in 4x12 when he's trying to flirt with Taylor and even that seemed kinda half-hearted and all over the place? He just doesn't even try! And look, it's one thing to need advice, and it's another to need an external push for literally every step of a relationship.

With Eddie, though, it's completely the opposite. From day one, Buck is all-in without needing direction from anyone—whether it's following him into danger, helping him with Chris, actually noticing whenever Eddie was not himself—especially in s5, where Buck panicked if Eddie got so much as a papercut, which really shows how apathetic he was with Taylor—and trying to help Eddie as best he could. And he's never needed anyone to tell him to do any of this. So, when it comes to choosing, there's already a precedent of Buck taking initiative when it comes to Eddie, as opposed to his other romantic endeavours. So, really, Buck being the one to finally initiate things between him and Eddie and choose him, is really the natural conclusion of all this.

Post in question

No but that's true, it's like Bobby says when Buck freaks out that Taylor is gonna leave him, he gets in relationships without having any idea how he got there or what to do when things get rough. He couldn't even figure out what to get Taylor for Christmas. And you're so right even his flirting with her was all over the place (how that man managed to sleep with as many people as the show implies is a mystery because he has no game, there's no way he was getting women on biceps alone but that's not the point now kapaka). He just goes through the motions with all of these women and keeps struggling because he decided love is work but cant see they it's work as in love won't just fall in your lap, you need to do something to get it, not as in I need to hold on to this forever and ever even if I don't want to be here anymore. And the whole thing with Natalia is that Buck was talking about wanting to pick the right person but she was the first woman we saw paying any attention to him all season and dude just latched on to that (don't blame would've also folded like a paper plane) but that exactly what he did to Taylor. While Natalia is miles better than Taylor for a lot of reason beginning with simply for the fact that she apologized for leaving when she came back, Buck is hanging on to whatever love is offered to him while failing to look around himself and see the connections he already has in his life. And the thing about Buck being attuned to Eddie since day one is so true, he never really hesitates with Eddie because the things Eddie needs seems to come on instinct to him. And he's so deep in his insecurities that he doesn't notice the way that Eddie keeps choosing to stay over and over again. Eddie picked Buck with the "you're badass under pressure" and has continuously picked Buck. Someone in the tags of that post also said something about Buck not realizing that Eddie misses him, and that's also true, I don't think Buck realizes exactly how big the space he has on Eddie's life is but since he always had to beg for love and Eddie has been giving it to him freely and without expectations he doesn't register that love as love. Like I said in my Eddie fell first essay, Buck never knew home as a place where he could find love. And that's what Eddie is, Eddie is a safe place to land no matter what. And I think in the end that's the thing, he never knew love with no strings attached so he doesn't know how to look for it. But he will never get the type of love he wants until he puts in the work to look for it. Because let's face it Eddie has been sitting around waiting for Buck to catch up for AT LEAST all of season 6.

Also if what Buck and Eddie have are not the exact opposite of the thing Bobby says "you just go with the flow and find yourself in a relationship with no idea how you got there or what to do when things start to go wrong" (went back to get the exact quote) because Buck made a conscious decision of inserting himself into Eddie's life. Eddie never asked for help with Christopher, Buck stepped up and offered because he could and that exchange tied them together. And contrary to every other relationship on Buck's life, Buck actually does know what to do when things go wrong with Eddie. But at the same time Buck didn't even notice. The man has a whole ass CHILD and he still hasn't realized what he has. I need to shake him around like and etch a sketch to see if stuff starts to register into that brain of his.

#anyway Buck dramatic speech about how Eddie is the one person who never left him before eddie grabs him and kisses hin 2024 #911 #buddie thoughts #i guess #911 meta #for saving purposes #i really need a tag for asks #anon 😌

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avawilsonfan · 8 months

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like. the whole point is that dean is his father as time passes he mirrors his moves and when he's lived his dad's life fully he starts spiraling and intensifying everything john ever was. john tells dean you need to take care of sam if i cant do it dean tells sam we need to take care of jack. dean's first thought was a demon deal to bring sam back in early seasons because that's what john did for dean. john is dean is dean is sam and each child gets sharper and gruffer and more terrifying until the spokes of the wheel catches on a branch and the cycle stops.

if i didn't know you i'd want to hunt you. lose my number if we make it out of this alive. if you step out that door don't come back. man up son and kill the girl. i'm gonna be sick.

i had a dream two nights ago where sam was dead in the desert, rotting under the sun with the stink of sinew and flies yet his corpse perfectly intact. he wanted to be found so his ghost could be burned and he could die, because enough was enough and at a point you get tired, but he didn't want to be found because dean and mary would surely find some way to bring him back. he wants his family to find him because that would mean they looked for him, but he doesn't because he shouldn't take up that kind of space in their minds and the weight is driving him insane. and he knows, he knows if they don't look for him then he's truly alone. he knows if they do look and find him it's some twisted form of familial obligation and perversion of love that he doesn't want. he doesn't want to be some kind of zombie walking around unable to form a coherent thought but wearing a veneer of normalcy for them.

it's you, it's you, you're the problem. but as time goes on and the days, then weeks pass, sam feels so alone, so truly alone. okay. if they aren't looking for him, he's heartbroken because of what they're supposed to be. i went to hell and you just settled down to live a normal life? you told me to get out. yeah but we don't actually do that, you weren't supposed to. dean is supposed to be looking for him and things are truly bleak- lose my number- if he isn't. but if that's the case maybe they'll help me pass. and his fuzzy sun-addled brain chooses a direction and starts walking. he's a ghost, it doesn't take much out of him. all he has to do is take his jewelry from his body and affix it to his ghostly self and he can disappear to wherever he wants to go. but right now he doesn't really want to be going anywhere. he knows he probably won't get what he wants from his family, logically, but he goes anyway. he's spent lifetimes sitting in the dark of the cage and these months of steady sun rise, sun set, rot not setting in has fucked with his perception of time and taken him back somewhat.

so he walks long enough, and eventually he ends up in the foyer of the bunker, unsure if he found his way here or if someone took him here after chasing him down. it's all barbed words and white knuckled hands clasping his, chastising words and soft platitudes telling him how worried they were and asking him, where's the body, where is it, where are you. it's sam trying to speak wondering how his throat can even get dry and out of use like this feeling the hands all over him and having weight settle where his stomach would have been telling him how wrong this all is. it's spelled equipment, handcuffs that keep him here and necklaces that make him solid to the touch without his effort that he can't remove. it's a soft room with salt at the door and a stack of classics on the nightstand next to a king sized bed. it's blood sacrifices and making sam watch, telling him that they just need to find the body, can't you remember where it is, i hate doing this but we need you and you're not allowed to leave. it's hugs that leave him feeling suffocated and pats on the back that make him flinch. it's his careful undressing and the dissection of his scars from the two people he least wants to see all of him. its castiel visiting and telling dean that's he's sorry he can't help more in front of sam, giving cold glances his way as he sits catatonic at the kitchen table.

it's terrible, and it's almost worse than if they had just found the body. who put the sigil in his body that's keeping them from finding it? all sam can tell them is that it was a desert somewhere, which is weaseled out of him by jo or charlie who pretended to be sympathetic and willing to burn the body for him. it's betrayal of the highest degree when dean tells him how he's disappointed, how it's dean that gets to be mad and feel betrayed.

theres two generations where theres the alcohol and anger next to the snappy disappearing act. because sam did this to himself, he created this by acting out the parts of the story that led them here. he was born into this, his birth was where it all started going wrong. you are your father and this is your son and you hate him as intensely as you love him.

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doodlebloo · 3 years

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Hello doodle boo, let’s start it off with the obvious pick, c!Tubbo for the ask game?

Ohh c!Tubbo headcanons I could do this all day truly.......

(all /rp of course)

A: Realistic

C!Tubbo obvi goes nonverbal sometimes when he's stressed or having a bad day, but he also normally likes to be alone on days like that. Not because he particularly dislikes the idea of company, but because he feels rude and uncomfortable sitting in silence with anyone...

...Anyone except for Tommy, of course.

Tubbo will sometimes go nonverbal and just follow Tommy around on his day to day, not speaking or even helping with his activities but just being near him (being near Tommy has always made Tubbo feel better.) Tommy never questions him (though he will ask him to help or joke about getting rid of him), and it really does make Tubbo feel better because he knows Tommy gets it, and won't think he's being weird or rude.

(Eventually, Tubbo is able to do this with Ranboo, too. Once Ranboo figures out that he shouldn't expect much conversation when Tubbo tags along on some mining trip with him, things get a lot easier for both of them.)

B: Funny

Tubbo has had so much weird shit happen to him that he just never mentions, Ranboo genuinely cant tell is he's lying sometimes.

Tubbo will sit and tell him about how he actually got possessed at one point by the spirit of an ancient archivist who compelled him to save every bit of current history he could so that it would remain intact after the nation inevitably fell, but Tubbo reckons he may have sort of enabled the possession by accidentally poisoning himself with pufferfish... It ended up okay, though, because at some point while he was hunting and exorcising dreamons he ended up exorcising the spirit from himself and now he only feels the compulsion to immortalize history like, once a month.

Ranboo just nods along and smiles and files it in his Tubbo book under the "???" category.

C: Sad

Tubbo misses Schlatt more than he'd ever like to admit. Nobody except for maybe Quackity will understand it, but Tubbo really did believe in Schlatt; He knew he was awful, but it was so conflicting for him. Yes, Schlatt killed him, but wasn't Tubbo sort of in the wrong? He was technically a traitor, even if he thought he was doing the right thing. Didn't Schlatt have the right to be suspicious of him, to have him executed? And what did Schlatt do that was so bad, anyway? He mistreated Niki, yes, that Tubbo knows, but most of his policies seemed... Strange, sure, but not inherently wrong.

Tubbo goes through cycles: one day he hates Schlatt, thinks he was nothing but a senile old man who had his cabinet do the work for him and drank himself to death. Other days, though, Tubbo reckons he may have been kind of brilliant, in his own fucked up way.

Tubbo knows he doesn't really wish Schlatt were still around, but... Sometimes he thinks about trying to find his ghost. Just to speak to for a bit.

D: Unrealistic

Listen. Regarding c!Tubbo's species, I honestly do prefer Human c!Tubbo. There are a lot of reasons why that I will likely make another post abt later but I really do like the idea of all the L'Manberg members, with the exception of Fundy and of course Eret's probable relation to Herobrine, being humans.

That being said... If I HAD to choose, moobloom hybrid c!Tubbo has so. Much. Potential to me. Nevermind the symbolism of the most bright and gentle of mob hybrids fighting wars and having nukes etc, I really just love the potential of this bc FLOWERS... Tubbo swearing he's doing fine in Manberg but Tommy touches his hair and one of the leaves cracks and flakes away. Tubbo's flowers staying wilted for a week or so after his death, staying wilted for the entirety of both times he thinks Tommy is dead. Michael giggling in delight as Tubbo is able to make a flower sprout right out of his hand and curl around Michael's hand... Again I do prefer Human Tubbo most but Moobloom Tubbo ALMOST made it into atyfil I really thought abt it............

#asks #i could talk abt cTubbo. for HOURS AND HOURS.#ty for the ask :D

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skywalkersthelimit · 4 years

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Okay so I'm super nervous to post this but I wrote this one-shot for the #trikey fandom. Ive had this idea for awhile but I finally got around to writing it. It's based off the song Lips of an angel by Hinder. I think its perfect for Michael and Trevor lol so please let me know what you think and I hope you enjoy!

Honey, why are you calling me so late?

It’s kinda hard to talk right now

Honey, why are you crying, is everything okay?

I gotta whisper 'cause I can't be too loud

Michael woke up to his phone ringing on his bedside table. He knew who it was before he even looked. He didn’t know how or why because it could have been a number of people. He reached over and grabbed the phone. His eyes squinted from the bright light. Trevor. He was both glad and disappointed he was right but he supposed he might have willed it to be. His thoughts had been filled with his crew mate, best friend and sometimes more, but that was before Amanda and the kids. Well that wasn’t entirely true. Every time they went on a job together, they fell into each other as soon as they were alone in their hotel room. Michael just couldn’t help himself.

It had been a few months since he had seen Trevor though. He tried to put distance between them. He knew that Trevor had a hard time just sleeping together on occasions and understanding Michael had a family to go home to. Michael wanted nothing more than for his friend to be happy but he just couldn’t be the one to give it to him.

He stared as the phone rang and debated answering but he pictured Trevor’s face the last time he had seen him with tears rolling down his face, begging Michael to stay. His heart clenched and he answered.

“Hello?” he whispered. He looked over at Amanda still sleeping. He had to be quiet. He didn't want to wake her and have her find out who he was talking to. He didn’t feel like fighting tonight.

“Hey." Trevor’s voice rang out on the other side of the phone.

“Jesus, Trev. Do you know what time it is?” He flinched as the words left his mouth. He didn’t mean to sound upset but he did.

Trevor laughed dryly.

“Oh I’m sorry, Princess. Am I interrupting your beauty sleep? I thought I might call my best friend who hasn’t talked to me in months” he said coldly.

“Trevor, if you want to talk you can call and you can call during the day.” Amanda moved next to him. He had to be quiet.

“Works both ways. If you wanted to talk you would have called. But you didn’t.” His voice cracked and ended in a broken sob. Michael hated himself a little more.

“T, why are you crying? Is everything okay?” he whispered. He wished he was there with Trevor right now. He would pull him into his arms and hold him until the tears stopped like he always did.

“Speak up M. I cant hear you"

“I have to be quiet or I’ll wake up-" he let his sentence go unfinished, trying to be careful not to set T off.

“Ah, of course. Wouldn’t want to wake the Mrs. I’ll let you go." He could hear the anger, the jealousy, the sadness, and the pain in Trevor’s voice.

“No!” he said rather loudly. He snapped over to look at Amanda, who just turned over on her side away from him. He sighed. “Don’t go. Just- Hang on.” He got out of bed quietly and snuck out the room. He grabbed his cigarettes off the counter and sat down on the couch, lighting one up and taking a deep inhale and exhale. He wasn't supposed to smoke in the house, but fuck it.

Well, my girl's in the next room

Sometimes I wish she was you

I guess we never really moved on

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name

It sounds so sweet

Coming from the lips of an angel

Hearing those words - it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye

But, girl, you make it hard to be faithful

With the lips of an angel

“Now tell me what’s going on, Trev. I can't be too loud. Mandy and the kids are in the other room asleep" he explained.

“I-I don’t know. I just needed to hear your voice.” Trevor replied quietly, his voice soft and tight like he was trying to stop himself from crying. Michael wondered what had him so upset. He had heard he had a boyfriend of sorts from Lester and apparently they’ve been doing jobs together for L since Michael saw T last. When L told him, he saw red. He got wasted and wound up outside screaming and crying at the night sky. Trevor was his, but he wasn't and he never would be. He didn’t want to but he hoped Trevor was calling to tell him he left that guy and to ask when Michael was coming back to work, to him. There was also a chance Trevor was calling because he was drunk and cranked out. Either due to said guy or something else or even for the hell of it. He might be in trouble or lying somewhere drugged out.

“Is it that guy you’re with?” Michael realized how incredibly jealous he sounded but maybe he was. Maybe he missed being on the road, never staying in one place too long. Maybe he missed the thrill of the job, and maybe he missed looking over in the middle of a heist and grinning at Trevor who was grinning just as hard back. Maybe he missed pulling Trevor into a hard kiss as soon as their hotel door shut and having the most passionate nights of his life, and then falling asleep in his lover’s arms. Maybe he even missed the times they just sat on the bed and talked for hours about any and everything. Maybe sometimes he wished it was Trevor who was in the other room, waiting for him to come back to bed.

“How-how do you even know about that?” Trevor asked, sounding surprised.

“Lester.”

“Of fucking course. Well not that it’s any of your business but he's asleep. It ain’t like he’s my boyfriend or anything. You know I ain’t they settling type. There’s only one exception. Fuck. I miss you, Mikey.” He sobbed.

“Trev-"

“It's okay. I understand. It’s just so good to hear your voice, Mikey.” There goes that nickname again. A nickname only Trevor called him. A nickname that sounded so sweet coming from Trevor’s lips. Like an angel. A fallen angel maybe.

“It's really good to hear your voice too T. Mikey. That’s a name I haven't heard in awhile” he said fondly.

“What, too good to be called Mikey anymore?” T said annoyed.

“No, not at all. Although you are the only one who calls me that, but I like it.” He felt his cheeks flush and his heart flutter as he spoke.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Now tell me what’s going on please."

“When are you gonna do a job? It’s been months. We miss you out there. I miss you. I-I need you, Mikey. Please come back to me. I can't stop thinking about you. You haunt me every waking moment, and even in my dreams. Do you dream of me?” Hearing those words made Michael feel weak. He almost told Trevor he was on his way, grabbed his car keys and left without a second thought, but he couldn’t. He wouldn’t leave his children. He might do a few jobs now and then but he wouldn’t choose that life over them. No matter how bad he craved it, craved him.

It's funny that you're calling me tonight

And, yes, I've dreamt of you too

And does he know you're talking to me?

Will it start a fight?

No, I don't think she has a clue

“Trevor, I-I want to be there. You know I do, but I got Tracey and Jimmy to think about, but I think about you too. All the time. Especially lately. It’s funny you called. And yeah, I’ve dreamt of you too T.” He didn’t know why he was being so open about this, about whatever it was between them, but hearing how broken Trevor sounded and how it matched how he felt inside, he knew they both needed to hear it. To hear that Michael cared about him, that he missed Trevor just as much as he missed him.

“Oh yeah? What’d you dream about, cowboy?” he asked and Michael could picture his thick eyebrows wagging. He laughed, genuinely laughed. Something he hadn’t done since the last time he saw Trevor.

“It wasn’t like that. Well not all like that.” Now it was Trevor’s turn to laugh.

“Tell me.” He told Michael.

“We were in a nice house, our house. We were happy.” He whispered, afraid of the way his dream made him feel. He didn’t want to dream of Trevor, of their future that would never be. He wished he could let Trevor go, but he didn’t think he ever fully would.

“It doesn’t have to be a dream, Mikey. The kids can be in your life, our life.” Trevor pleaded. Michael had to change the subject before he agreed.

“What about that guy you've been seeing? Does he know you’re talking to me? Won't he get mad?”

"I told you he's not my boyfriend. I don't care if he gets mad, but no, he doesn't know I'm talking to you. He doesn't know anything about you except you're the great Michael Townley, expert thief. He actually wants to meet you." Trevor laughed dryly at that. "What about Amanda? Does she know you're talking to me? Does she know anything?"

Does she know anything, meaning does she know when Michael goes away to work he all but forgets about her? Does she know that his nights with Trevor are filled with more passion than their whole marriage has ever seen? Does she know that Michael's heart will never fully belong to her?

"No, no I don't think she has a clue, Trev." He sighed. The guilt constantly ate at him and he tried so hard to be the husband she deserved, the father his children deserved, but he never would me. He belonged to the game, to Trevor, but it didn't matter. How he felt didn't matter, couldn't matter. He would push his feelings down to the bottom of his heart with a smile.

"Mikey. I miss you so much. So much it hurts. I can't get you out of head, out of my heart. I've tried drugs and alcohol. I've tried fucking anyone in sight and even getting a wannabe you, but nothing works. I've tried telling myself you're better off with her, but you're not. You're miserable and so am I. Please just do the best thing for you, for us." He begged through sobs. Michael could hardly make out what he was saying.

He felt tears rolling down his face. He felt Trevor's words stab his soul. He tried to drown Trev out too. He drank so much even he was worried. He smoked several packs of cigarettes a day. He went to strip clubs almost every night and almost every time he brought one of the girls to his car or a hotel for a quick fuck. He just wanted to feel numb, to never know the pain of loving someone you could never be with. What was that saying? It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. He wasn't sure if he agreed, but inevitably he did. He would feel this pain a thousand times just to know what it was like to love and be loved by this man. What it felt like to lay in his arms as he rubbed his back and kissed his head. He couldn't give that up. He wasn't ready for that.

"I'm gonna call Lester tomorrow and get a job set up. I'll let you know where to go. Everything will be okay. I'll see you in a few days. I promise. Okay?"

"Yeah okay, but what about-" Michael cut him off.

"We'll talk about everything then." He knew he was lying and Trevor probably did too. They both knew he would never be able to leave his family and that pretty little white lies would have to suffice them.

"Okay Mikey, I'll see you in a few days. And you better show up" he threatened, half jokingly.

"I'll be there, Trev. And Trev?"

"Yeah?"

"Next time call me during the day" he said chuckling.

"Yes princess. See ya soon Mikey." He said before hanging up.

Trevor just makes it too hard to be faithful and Michael was weak.

#trikey #michael de santa #trevor philips #gta v #Spotify

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years

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Ali & Carly

Ali: oi walsh Ali: wanna go to a party where the guestlist is undesirable Ali: not in the cool way Ali: but the drinks will be aplenty Carly: u had me @ party but keep talking Ali: obviously you love when I chat you up Ali: family function but they ain't gonna force smalltalk on you w the booze, like so no fear Carly: love wen ur offering 2 take me away Carly: compliments are a beautiful bonus Carly: ur hot bro gonna b there?? Ali: easy Ali: take you somewhere better than wherever he is after if you play your cards right Ali: and someone isn't too OD'd on beer and BBQ by tonight to organise a decent shindig Carly: yea lads r sooo easy Carly: its boring Carly: showing my cards we should get some 💊 & fly through it Ali: 👌 Ali: sadly my mother refuses to address her issues so no stocked medicine cabinet here to raid Ali: I'll ask about Carly: ha Carly: mine don't Carly: I've got this Carly: show your love later Ali: 🙌 Ali: gimme her number Ali: put in the groundwork now like the overachiever I am Carly: [does give her number out] Carly: k but you love me more Ali: obviously Ali: love of my life Ali: gotta rep my manners with your ma though Carly: said as ur slipping ur 💍 off & giving some other bitch the 👀 Carly: how my da works Ali: hmm Ali: better leave her alone then Ali: don't need to repeat her mistakes Carly: if 1 person did the cabinet wouldn't be full for us Carly: let's keep one 'rent 💔 at a time Ali: smart Ali: that's why you're my bae Carly: its cos I kno how to juggle 💘 Carly: & other body parts ofc Ali: 😂 Ali: and a decent trip, hopefully 🤞 Ali: your mum's got a mixture, yeah or do I need to bring tissues Ali: or 🥊 Ali: what's the #mood Carly: whatever you want it to be baby Carly: shes got docs wrapped around her finger Carly: hers anyway Carly: mine's a woman & she refuses to flirt w her own gender Ali: k am a bit in love with her now Ali: soz Ali: clearly send her in, she'll change her tune and your prescription Carly: other than my da who isnt Carly: taught me everything I kno Carly: leave her a message she'll hit you back if you pretend to be hot lad Ali: 💔 that Carly: same I could have two mas Carly: more clothes & drugs to steal Ali: idk, my missus might reckon your da's a style icon Carly: ha Carly: she coming? Ali: nah Ali: you wanna see actual flirting w a middle-aged woman, like, she's your woman Ali: I can't Carly: on her bday she'll propose a 3way w ur ma Carly: been there Ali: 🤢 Ali: that's vile Ali: her diehard need to be more chivalrous than any man should work in my favour for once, like Carly: k Carly: tell me I'm wrong wen she's 1 year older & you ain't had to nah that Ali: bold of you to assume we won't be happily married by then, babe Ali: it ain't til feb Ali: hint hint buy me something Carly: ur married to me Carly: so you gotta say no Carly: & i kno ur a typical aquarius Carly: but I said hers you weren't listening such a hubby mood Ali: wish I could be the man you want and say I don't remember when it is Ali: but I think I do so Ali: 💔 fucking estrogen and empathy strikes again Ali: ultimate cockblock Carly: im not wrapping myself in a ribbon for her so idc when it is Ali: gutted for her Ali: when's yours then Carly: I'm a gemini girl Carly: guess Ali: ah fuck Ali: gonna have to kick it belated Ali: just means I have to go harder so enjoy Ali: hmm Ali: gonna go for 21st Carly: 😢 Carly: nope Ali: damn Ali: just wishful thinking I'd only just missed it, tbh Ali: it's June though, not May Ali: I'm positive Carly: yea Ali: I'll ask our mans Ali: shake him down for all that knowledge I'm sure he's hiding Carly: try it Carly: be funny Carly: how wrong he is Ali: counting on it Ali: how else am I stealing his girl Carly: im not his Carly: already yours Ali: 'course Ali: you seen him much since partygate Carly: just waved him out before you hit me w your invite Carly: y i said yea so fast Ali: I get it Ali: making him leave was always harder than it had any right being Ali: least he didn't invite himself Carly: he makes himself comfortable if I am or not Carly: revolving door on this caravan too so Ali: having 'nam flashbacks Ali: yikes Ali: let's not waste any more time talking 'bout exes tonight Ali: or currents Carly: did your ma let him in on her way out too or does she only like the girls ur w? Carly: aw you don't wanna talk Carly: let me apply gloss hold on Ali: safe to assume he's not coming 'cos of multiple people Ali: not just Lene Ali: 🍓 if you got it, babe Carly: & she's not coming cos of multiple ppl not just ur ma Carly: you not a 🍒 girl hm Carly: interesting Ali: she's not coming 'cos I ain't asked her Ali: awkward if my mother has taken the initiative but help the party go with a swing, I guess Ali: nah, you're a 🍓 girl Ali: too sweet for 🍒 Carly: cos you asked me i kno 😍 so cute Carly: aw you want me to taste how i naturally do Carly: even cuter Ali: be more fun Ali: invite her to my next protest or something more fitting Ali: nothing personal Carly: hey i can be loud Carly: do it all the time Ali: aw you want all her invites now? 😏 Carly: yea Carly: you want me you got me 💍 Ali: alright Ali: you're on Carly: k Ali: get ready for so many adventures Carly: 😊 Carly: wot am i wearing to this 1? Carly: gotta dress for hot bros & disapproving mas Ali: 🙄 Ali: if that's the mood you wanna go for Ali: though idk why you'd choose that over turning my head but go off, honey Carly: i can do that in what Im wearing rn Carly: gimme a challenge Ali: love the confidence Ali: my ma ain't but you will need it with my brother Carly: they all play hard to get until i get there Carly: being easy keeps it easy for them Carly: not my first bbq Ali: nah babe Ali: remember, we're ditching before it gets to that part of the evening Ali: soz to 💔 but I'll be nicer about it than he would so also welcome Carly: throw the keys in the salad bowl as soon as i get there idc Carly: no foreplay needed Ali: gotta get you outta the caravan park more, babe7 Carly: yea Carly: im walking now before he can follow me Ali: meet you halfway? Ali: will bring a crowbar if he's being that clingy Carly: ha Carly: im in the stash don't be sad Carly: ill leave you lots Ali: 👍 leave me chance to catch up too and no worries Carly: ofc Carly: 💙 Ali: you're a doll Carly: yea thats y everyone wants to fuck me Ali: nah Ali: plenty of other reasons for that though Carly: its k you dont need to list off ur compliments 1 per 💊 Carly: i feel the love Ali: you ain't saving me that many, I know 💚 Carly: aw Carly: ur so sweet Ali: nicer to my wives than my girlfriends, obvs Ali: pecking order Carly: 😊 Carly: she's still lucky to have you cos ur an angel to me Ali: you Ali: trust, no angel Ali: and that ain't some juvenile attempt at a brag there Carly: it's a flirt 😈😉 ha Carly: you wanna misbehave w me in front of your whole fam im there Ali: assuming my brother ain't up for it, obvs Carly: cant i have both Carly: what kind of bi r u Ali: one that don't like her brother's handmedowns Ali: lived that life long enough Ali: he ain't a style icon either Carly: ur first Carly: hes maybe Ali: was hoping if we skipped ronan and lene off the guestlist we could avoid the punch-up, tbh babe Carly: aw you dont wanna fight for me Carly: 💔😢 Ali: I mean my brother's girlfriend will have you Ali: only tryna protect, not kill your vibe Carly: scarier than your gf? Ali: deffo Ali: she wishes, the real threesome request that'll spell the end of it all 🙄 Carly: hes forgotten then Carly: be more fun just me & you Ali: obviously Ali: been tryna tell you but easier to prove it Carly: k Carly: ready when you are Ali: soz, forgot shoes Ali: gimme 5 Carly: ha Carly: im not wearing any & im fine Carly: you just wanna do a last mirror check for me 💙 so cute Ali: 😂 Ali: such a pisstake, you walsh Carly: part time flower child you Carly: but its k i still love you Ali: just defending why I'm being so slow Ali: obvs my 😍 weighing me down but lemme have some pride, woman Carly: ha Carly: you're my cute 🐌 Ali: now you're gonna be adorable, fucking hell Ali: you're dangerous Carly: if you cant handle me now wait til I come up Carly: 💊s are the real danger baby Ali: I'll be caught up by then Ali: might have to double-down but I can handle that, no worries Carly: they r being so slow 😢😢😢 Ali: ride it out, baby Carly: you sounded like him then Carly: except hes never called me baby ever Ali: oh dear Ali: I've gone full dickhead Ali: 😬 Ali: I'll take it down a notch Carly: no youre being sweet Carly: theres just lots of ways to trigger a fuck flashback when youre me Carly: dont change Ali: dunno if I could but glad you still wanna keep me around Carly: ofc Carly: i love you Ali: you're so pure Carly: not for years soz boo Carly: & this stash aint either Carly: such a let down 💔😢 Ali: shh Ali: we can make it work Ali: there's enough here to get crossfaded Carly: just dont hate me k Ali: why and how could I ever Ali: silly wabbit Carly: easily Carly: my phones full of Ali: you gonna fuck my girlfriend? Ali: or me and leg it Ali: neither's likely so we're all good, baby girl Carly: she scares me still even if she would have an amazing collection of giant strap ons Ali: 😂 Ali: well I can neither confirm nor deny Carly: no need its every lesbian of her kind Carly: labelled herself Ali: just don't bring up penis envy Ali: she'll lose it Ali: #freudstarteditbabe Carly: can i ask her what she'd do first if she woke up w one? Carly: fave ice breaker Ali: it is gold Ali: but save it 'cos it's just me and you remember Carly: do you wanna know my answer Ali: of course Carly: guess Carly: you owe me a right answer for my wrong bday Ali: Hmm okay Ali: would you Ali: bang as many people as humanly possible Carly: i do that anyway Ali: well you get banged, if we wanna be misogynistic about it Ali: I know what I'd do Carly: more fun with more holes tho so I'm not mad Carly: first thing I'd do is measure to see if I need to brag or exaggerate Ali: pragmatic of you Ali: hadn't even considered that Carly: wanna know if mine's bigger than the lads I've been w ofc Carly: size matters idc what small dicked lads are trying to say Ali: yeah but they're always thinking length when really Ali: girth is where it's at Carly: yea Carly: shouldve taught that in school Ali: how to measure circumference Ali: they defs did Carly: yea?? Carly: idk Ali: I'll show you Ali: on a beer can Ali: unrealistic expectation but you get the idea Carly: all my expectations r unrealistic Carly: make me cum is a stretch for most lads on site Ali: babe Ali: gonna make me 😥 Carly: youre the pure 1 aint you Carly: aw Ali: hardly Ali: saying at least I get that, like Ali: minimum Carly: your gf has some uses that arent being your ma's BFF Ali: precisely Ali: I would've been a bit kinder with it but in a nutshell Ali: what about ronan at least Carly: have you forgotten him now youve upgraded Carly: shouldnt need my review Ali: shh, he'll cry Carly: he was when i wouldnt let him stay for dinner idc Ali: poor boy 😏 Carly: one of his other girls can cook for him Carly: my ma aint there & i aint doing it Ali: he needs to just give in and marry one of his own Ali: it's what he wants, no matter what he reckons Carly: he told me he is Carly: but hes said worse for a fuck so idk Ali: rude Ali: where's my invite to mourn my loss, boy Carly: ill tell him to text you Carly: wont have lost your number Ali: got the drunk texts to prove it Ali: bless Carly: ha Carly: only answer mine tho Carly: 💍 perks Ali: only if I ain't also there with ya Carly: yea Carly: youre gonna b w me forever so Ali: I'll just tell you in person then Ali: if you tell me Ali: deal? Carly: k Carly: i feel happy Carly: 😊😊😊😊😊 Ali: you're on your way Ali: where are you, btw Carly: the longest road ever Ali: hm, tell me about it Ali: I'll run Ali: in dramatic, sexy slo-mo Carly: me too Carly: only way i run Carly: see you when we collide Ali: wifey goals Ali: won't even try and make it our lips that collide Ali: scout's honour Carly: anticipations more fun Carly: plenty of other places I can touch you first Ali: we'll pretend you meant my 💘 Carly: i did that first night @ first 👀 Ali: no lie, we'll have to think of somewhere else innocent-sounding then Ali: do some experimenting, straight girl Carly: i have Carly: i told you ready when you are Ali: I told you, dangerous Carly: only if you get caught Carly: i won't tell if you don't Carly: so good at keeping secrets Ali: I'll sort it Ali: I made vows Ali: she'll understand Carly: were just taking them seriously Carly: nobody can be mad about that Ali: deadly, like Ali: also forgot a bra, naturally and this run is killing me Carly: somewhere innocent I can touch you then Carly: god works in obvious ways Carly: like you Ali: please Ali: if I was doing it for your benefit sure I'd put one on Ali: show 'em off Carly: you kno you dont need to Carly: not your first bbq either Ali: 😏 Ali: maybe Carly: no maybe u kno Carly: & you can feel my 😍 Carly: travelling faster than my slo mo run Ali: love being your wcw, babe 😉 Carly: idk what that is Carly: but if the first letters arent wild child I'm sad Ali: that's far less straight girl so we'll go with it Ali: hope for you yet, like Carly: youre not gonna tell me what it means Ali: woman crush wednesday Ali: used exclusively by girls like Leesha and that Carly: omg i think my ma said that @ the telly the other night Carly: it wasnt wednesday Ali: feeling like hyping up Chezza whatever the night Ali: I 👀 you Carly: but youre wrong Carly: i dont have a crush on you i love you Ali: so if I need a kidney you're down Ali: but no gay shit Ali: 👌 Carly: yea cos whats mine is yours Carly: all of me Carly: so you can have anything you want Ali: good to know Ali: make a killing on the black market Carly: just tell me if youre draining me in the tub so i can have a good last nite before Carly: & stop making me beg for gay shit that's not a mood Carly: i dont do the begging its the other way round Carly: ask anyone Ali: of course Ali: I ain't an animal Ali: you don't have to beg Carly: what do you want me to say then Ali: what you want Ali: obviously Carly: find me Carly: you can do that yea Ali: easy Ali: [does 'cos how long can one road be] Carly: [most excited hug that turns into the longest hug & moment because well we know] Ali: [turns it into linking arms and walking 'fore shit gets too real here] Carly: [is just happy & loling & chatting shit which is endless compliments basically like her eyes being tiny skies & sunshine hair etc you get the idea because high af] Ali: [is listening and not dismissing it 'cos not that bitch but also knows she's high so not being like ooh lol, 'you're so pure'] Carly: [dramatically stops cos remembers suddenly that she needs to give Ali her share so does, sad & mad at herself like she's so upset she nearly forgot bless] Ali: [cups her chin like hey and tells her it's okay whilst looking in her eyes as she takes her share] Carly: [back to being smiley just like that because reassurance bitch & takes her hand & leads her along cos handholding ftw] Ali: [is happy she's happy again] Carly: [her phone is going off cos Ronan but she's ignoring cos only got eyes for Alison rn] Ali: ['you put love eggs in or?'] Carly: [talks in depth about how she's drawing the line at borrowing that kinda shit from her ma cos oversharer even when she ain't high & also throws her phone to Ali playfully like no look so we can imagine how lovely those messages are even just from the first line preview thing] Ali: [takes Carly's thumb so she can open it and reply 'cos that bitch] Carly: [is just loling even though this is such a bad idea] Ali: [schools him in a way that probably sounds familiar lbr] Carly: [then a selfie sesh cos those bitches they love themselves] Ali: [takes her sunnies off her head and puts 'em on Carly 'cos her eyes are massive/pinholed depending which way we're rocking this lol] Ali: [does a 'shh' like no one's gonna know] Carly: [you know she's keeping them sunnies forever now soz] Ali: [just swinging their arms having a gay old time] Carly: [just singing something as they going cos no stage fright when high af & her voice is nice so its a moment] Ali: [😍] Carly: [more compliments when she notices Ali is looking at her cos she's pretty af lbr] Ali: ['how many other hidden talents you got, like?'] Carly: [thinks about it way harder than the question warrants like its a hard question cos lowkey is when you don't reckon you got any skills. Says 11 cos bday clue & lucky number with a mysterious expression like but then laughs cos if she has to ever back that up awks] Ali: [lols back but squeezes her hand like don't doubt it] Carly: [looks down at her feet because actually is shoeless here 'how far?'] Ali: [gestures like 'piggyback?' but ain't that far in my mind] Carly: [accepts because always, good thing Ali is strong & Carly is skinny cos they literally the same height] Ali: [galloping about and into your function like idiots 'cos she's coming up now too] Carly: [miracle that Carly don't fall cos not holding on properly cos wants to stretch her arms out so its like a bike with no handlebars situation lol] Ali: [imagine everyone's faces lmao] Carly: [Tess scowl be like seen from space] Ali: [gets situated on the grass and is just helping herself to drinks Carly: [is just having a little dance by herself cos feeling great not soz everyone especially not soz Ro cos you wish you could babe] Ali: [at least little rock can join in] Carly: [aw the two of them dancing together like cute nerds & she's spinning him round & everything] Ali: [just ignoring all her fam's questions and being chatty af like nothing's weird 'cos high, then joining in 'cos duh more fun[ Carly: [all you can hear is Carly's laugh which is the best so deal with it fam thank you, let my sweet baby angel be happy] Ali: [when you being blatant af] Carly: [when you don't need to be touching a girl who has a girlfriend this much when you dancing in a non sexy way but you is] Ali: [defs need a sprinkler they can all be running through] Carly: [wet t-shirts ftw I see you] Ali: [is motioning like come to my room but not like that lads, just get some weed like you need it] Carly: [takes some drinks with her but the only mental image I have is when Lily in Skins with armfuls when she says keep your vagina on & I'm loling] Ali: [hey ro hey] Carly: [okay but Carly trying to talk to her & being so nice cos she's so pure & Ro being so rude] Ali: [even in her state given her all the disappointed looks like ??] Carly: [this sweet child laughing it off cos how she do but how dare you Ro, I'm mad] Ali: [going to the kitchen for food, accidental ultimate ro shade] Carly: [just following Ali cos she's never been here & don't know where she's going but quieter cos you can tell she's thinking what did I do wrong cos how her brain works] Ali: [being reassuring af] Carly: [sitting on the kitchen counter swinging her legs looking so cute with her dirty feet & drinks from the tap cos she do what she want] Ali: ['you look beautiful'] Carly: [smiles & laughs like its chill but is seriously 😳 cos who says nice things to her like this ever] Ali: [gets them and rocky ice lollies bye everyone else] Carly: [when you eating it seductively without being aware or trying to be that cos its your life] Ali: [is giggling 'cos high] Carly: [more compliments because how cute] Ali: [lays her head in her lap to 'cloudgaze' aka sneak peeks] Carly: [playing with her hair & freckles sporadically because she's soft & intimate like that, be more blatant girl, love it] Ali: [doing daisychain around her wrist 'cos bringing it back] Carly: [finally remembers there are drinks so is on that but v distracted looking at & touching Ali, oh girl same we all would] Ali: [tryna be chill but obvs into it regardless of how 'straight she is] Carly: [lies in the grass & does snow angel moves like she can flatten the grass & make one, god bless you babe, brings Ali with her so they just snuggling cos we can be this blatant] Ali: [just stroking her hair nbd] Carly: [loves it & is making it known by talking about how good it feels & throwing out compliments like its her job sorry for how gay this is everyone but she thinks Ali is the best so] Ali: [backatcha telling her how pure and sweet she is and they're just blabbing at each other] Carly: [soz k stew but this is cute] Ali: [when you wanna kiss her so bad 'cos you're high and happy and this is a mood] Carly: [I'll either save or condemn us cos she's gonna go take some more pills so they don't wear off so they could be alone if Ali goes with & she'd be dragging her along so v dangerous] Ali: [looking at themselves in the mirror and making funny faces] Carly: [& Carly just peeing cos no shame, same tbh] Ali: [but doing like war/festival style paint on each other's face with like, whatever lipstick has been left in that bathroom] Carly: [but think how close Ali would have to be to her face to do that like how has she not kissed her, applause needed honestly] Ali: [draws a lil heart on Carly's nose] Carly: [can't stop looking at herself cos loves it] Ali: [takes loads of pictures, improtu bathroom photoshoot sesh] Carly: [likewise taking loads of pics of Ali but like weird close ups cos she gaaaaaaaay & focused on the details] Ali: [posing 'cos we know she's about it lmao] Carly: [more touching of freckles like she's gonna draw something connect the dots style but just using her fingers cos they are perfect as they are & she'd say so] Ali: [not much would phase her but she would be blushing rn] Carly: [just gushing about how adorable she is endlessly like it'd be too much from anyone else] Ali: [keeps saying ILY 'cos being off your face ftw] Carly: [saying it back of course & all the terms of endearment like baby, angel etc cos that's just how she is anyway] Ali: [someone, probably Tess, banging on the door like they're desperate, we see you ma] Carly: [jumps out of her skin, again same] Ali: [hugs her protectively] Carly: [smelling her hair like a peak gay during the hug because lbr it'd smell nice, no shade or shame here, more compliments for that obvs] Ali: [going back downstairs before there's a brawl but when you ain't even phased 'cos something happening here deal fam Carly: [when you lowkey dancing your way back out cos you happy af & you find the dog on the way so you're carrying him with you & kissing & loving him & its adorable sorry bye] Ali: [and spuds such a funny looking boy lmao] Carly: [lying on the grass again spooning the dog & singing to him probably a song from when she was little & her mum cared like he a baby] Ali: [just watching and melting 'cos actually so cute, don't cry bitch lmao] Carly: [sees her & crawls over like hey, curling up with her again because the lap is a mood forever & we need to claim it from your future child for the gays] Ali: [doing teeny tiny plaits in her hair and humming the song she was just singing to the dog] Carly: [just chatting shit the whole time soz everyone else but they loving life let them be] Ali: [just getting to know each other hardcore 'cos neither of them has much time for small talk or bullshit anyway so on drugs it'd be like 1000 percent more intense, also shamelessly ignore a call and multiple texts from your actual girlfriend] Carly: [but then after all that because I'm evil & she's 'straight' let's say she makes eye contact with Fraze somehow so off she goes to flirt with him as if that's even a possibility when you know it'd just be annoying like her taking his 🚬 to try & be so cool & seductive, babe no. He's just like Ali control your girls] Ali: [is annoyed but not gonna do anything unless it got more dramatic like you deal, casually going through her phone to find a party or something] Carly: [Fraze just being such a dickhead soz Carly also knowing that's Bea's lipstick because of course he does so loling about her & Ali's impending doom] Carly: [also Ro coming out cos someone made her to 'eat' so just being super judgey such joy] Ali: [fully like fuck this like don't kill my vibe fam so walking like she just gonna go in the house but really she peacing] Ali: if ur done come back out Carly: where d u go? Ali: found us a party Carly: k Carly: [catches up to her like oh hey] Ali: [tells her it ain't far to go and starts walking] Carly: [looks down at her feet like she only just remembered she's not wearing shoes but doesn't miss a beat in keeping in step with her because being gay is more important] Carly: dont b mad @ me Ali: [looks down too and is like, we can go get shoes first if you want lol] Ali: I ain't Carly: the colours around you have changed Carly: i kno u r Ali: nah it's like Ali: hmm Ali: I'm not sure what it's like Carly: like me again Carly: [is saying sorry because always quick to that one] Ali: ['I do, you don't need to say that'] Carly: [trying to give Ali her drink as a peace offering like hmm I've done something wrong must make amends somehow] Carly: [& then more pills when she remembers she has them still] Ali: [shrugs like why not and accepts, cue Leesha and probably her 'best' friend tottering out of her house looking the most overdressed] Carly: [Carly loling because she has the whole day but these bitches taking it as a slight against their everything] Ali: [Leesha started shouting the odds 'cos mother's daughter and obvs already white girl wasted, Ali like let's just go 'cos over it] Carly: [Carly offering her pills cos change your mood babe & being looked at like she's offering poison, you've been there before Leesha I get it] Ali: [tryna lowkey drag her away before this becomes the Thing tm they want it to be for the #drama] Carly: [Carly just chatting about Ali's heroics & how sweet she is cos knight in shining armor for her forever lbr just like 😍] Ali: [loling] Carly: [Carly just out the blue like 'you should kiss her, then she'd be happier' like no babe Leesha ain't you but I love the softness of your world view] Ali: ['fully converted, are you?'] Carly: [lols but is also like 'you haven't kissed me yet' with a cute little pouty face as she walks on slightly ahead looking at the sky] Ali: ['Night still young, baby'] Carly: [clearly is buzzing about this & not hiding that 'I love you more than her' how unspecific she could mean Leesha or K stew or both, god bless] Ali: [is all 'I know' but not 'cos she's a cocky bitch lmao 'cos you're pure'] Carly: [puts her arms up like a child who wants to be picked up cos she wants Ali to carry her into the party] Ali: [does 'cos duh even if she's joking about how high maintenance she is] Carly: [snuggling into her the whole time cos she's soft] Ali: [let's hope it's not too far, probably some 20-something hippie waster's chill thing] Carly: [when you humming but using Ali's heartbeat as your basis for a tune cos gaaaaaaaaaaay] Ali: [when you're harmonizing] Carly: [#goals for real] Carly: [but then she gotta stop so she can compliment Ali again cos we know her voice is fire but Carly didn't necessarily know this] Ali: ['we should jam for real some time'] Carly: [cue her rambling stage fright reveal because like we said no time for bullshit so its just being put out there & she's like 'you'll have to sing to me'] Ali: [is like okay but silently thinking of all the ways she could help her confidence 'cos that bitch but not gonna be pushy and patronizing about it 'cos not THAT bitch] Carly: [just staring at her adorably all like 'what are you thinking about?'] Ali: ['you'] Carly: [such a big smile but also blushing 'good things?'] Ali: [just gives her a look that's like what do you think and obviously, yes] Carly: [a big hug moment and kisses her on her forehead cos where the thoughts come from] Ali: [the mess of lipstick their faces are] Carly: [they must look crazy, living for it] Ali: [good thing no one at this party will care, turn up and chatting to people and the usual] Carly: [there should be someone there for Carly to hook up with to hurt Ali's heart & reaffirm the 'straightness'] Ali: [when you can't 'cos you got a gf, gutted] Carly: [who is probably still trying to contact you cos highkey] Ali: [text her back girl, come on] Carly: [do it while your real gf is getting you a drink lol] Ali: [let's text]

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