#he is in there

[floofballsammy]

Was so motivated I actually animated again.

(click for better quality).

[samthecookielord]

YIPPEEEEEEE music :D

[bomberqueen17]

yeet

ok i spent too long dithering about this so here it is. Direct sequel to A Genuine Talent, this is what happens when Cantarella gets back to Nilfgaard and goes to find out whether Teofina Voorhis knows anything about the Harlot of Repute novels.

A Matter of Principle, on AO3

I quite forgot whether I was being coy about what Teofina does or does not know. This story is not really coy in any way, LOL.

All my beta readers have at the moment become sidetracked and distracted by life events etc.; it’s usually the case that if there are errors they are my own, but it goes double in this case, as I didn’t get any feedback on this one before posting. As there are some slightly sensitive topics in here, I apologize in advance if I missed something super obvious, as I am wont to do. But I did my best.

“You’re a woman without peer,” Amadis agreed fondly, his broad hand sliding familiarly over Teofina’s bare hip to adjust the way her weight was pressing down against his erection.

“How are you still so beautiful,” Malvina said, sounding almost upset about it.

“It’s a lie, that children ruin you,” Teofina said. “It’s a lie that age ruins you. I was not very pretty when I was your age, darling. Amadis married himself a girl everyone considered unfortunate-looking, let me tell you.”

“No one said that,” Amadis pointed out, but Teofina patted his face absently.

“It was an investment,” Teofina said. “I had to live in this body, and live in this face, and grow into it. Most of it is how you carry yourself anyway. I know, dearie,” and she patted Malvina now, “that you’re very pretty, and you were probably a pretty child too, and you were led to believe your looks would peak when you were twenty and it would all be downhill from there, but they were lying. Men want you too innocent to recognize their bullshit, that’s all, that’s why the ideal is a woman who looks too young to have ever been touched before.”

“I’ve been almost looking forward to losing my looks,” Malvina said, a little forlornly. “Then I could do something else with my life.”

“Darling,” Teofina said, and kissed her. “My sweet! Have you been told that it’s a terrible sin and waste not to use this beauty for fucking?”

“Sort of,” Malvina sighed.

“If you don’t want to fuck, you shouldn’t have to,” Teofina said. “What would you rather do with your life?”

“Oh,” Malvina said, very clearly recollecting herself, “I-- it’s not that I mind. I just. You know.”

[sebfreak]

[lavbotomy]

closet tour! (he wouldn’t stop staring at me so i had to put him back there)

[katelynisboring]

if we’re running back to tumblr I think we should at least honor more of our roots in general like…

[sadclowncentral]

the city where we live doesn't allow public barbecues so my brother fucking welded a grill to a handcart and now hosts "chill and grill sessions" where he sends all his friends his live location so they can hunt him down on their bikes with sausages in their backpacks while he carts it around evading the police like some sort of barbecue vigilante, grilling on the run. i have never been prouder of him

[wolfythewitch]

jesus in the hades art style

[notaplaceofhonour]

okay okay I know the point of this is “White people need to put as much effort into learning how to pronounce Black people’s names as they do foreign European names” and 100% I totally agree, absolutely good point

but this tweet becomes hilarious in the context of this clip:

anyways, absolutely put effort into learning how people pronounce their names. just don’t feel bad if it takes you some time to get it right 😅

(also in case you didn’t watch the video it’s “N-SHOO-tee” not “SHOO-tee”)

[pillowprincessvarric]

I also think that all the "um okay knives out & glass onion were good. Wrap it up now" posts are so funny. You're tripping if you think there's not going to be at least five Benoit Blanc films lol

[fangs-4-fags]

remembering the time i drunkenly told a stranger i was a trans man and he started going off about alpha sigma and beta males and how each one was equally important no matter what anyone says and that i shouldn't feel pressured to be a strong alpha male because emotionally intelligent beta males were just as important

[awittylemon]

kabru is so fucking funny. he’s out here playing 15 dimensional manipulation mind chess with a guy whose hobby is barking like a dog

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Knowledge Revenge.

[contact-guy]

sherlock holmes deduces you are trans before you've figured it out yourself and refers to you with those pronouns and then when you look confused is like "ah...had you not arrived at that conclusion yet?" and wafts away in his dressing gown to smoke seventeen pipes, leaving you in a gender crisis

[phantomrose96]

With the Reddit 3rd party app crackdown and the ongoing horseshit Elon Musk is pulling with "X", I realize a lot of people here might be pretty new. So I put together a quick and easy guide for using Tumblr for anyone new who might need it.

Tumblr was made by David Karp and we call him Daddy around these parts (^///^)

You are not safe from fandom-gif attacks ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

Speaking of fandoms, the tumblr fandoms are always ready to grab their [object] and go to war against the Beliebers ╰(*°▽°*)╯

The only safe refuge from fandom tumblr is with hipster tumblr. If you can get a cool alt-girl to take you under her wing, you might be safe... for now (●'◡'●)

You will watch the first episode of Supernatural... and then you're part of the Winchester family. (Or if you skip right to season 4, we don't blame you. It's where Destiel starts (*/ω＼*))

This is not a glomp-free zone ☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

Use missing e. It's the only way to make Tumblr useable on Internet Explorer (this is the most popular browser and you're probably using it right now) :-D

Our only adult-supervision is John Green... and even then does that REALLY count as supervision? DFTBA! φ(゜▽゜*)♪

Just this once, everyone lives. It's bigger on the inside. Elementary, my dear Watson.

If you see Misha Collins staring at you, the polite response is "Saving people, hunting things, the family business." O.O

I might lose followers for this, but this blog supports gay rights, and yours should too (14 gifs of Sherlock and The Hobbit)

Tumblr will teach you more about the world than you'll ever learn in school. ○( ＾皿＾)っ

Tread carefully... we have teh yaoiz O.o. Oh you don't know what that means? Well let's just say... it's full of lemons here.

If you see Hannibal Lector in a flower crown, tell him it looks very nice. His boyfriend Will Graham made it for him. (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

Do not enter the dog park. The dog park will not harm you.

[necromimetics]

can’t stop thinking about my friend’s cishet partner who said last night that he doesn’t think anyone is the same gender. god-tier take.