☆welcome to my blog!!!☆
haii :D im ash!!!
my pronouns r he/they/it/bite :3 im also pansexual and a trans guy!
im a high schooler :P
i have tourettes syndrome, epilepsy, mdd, and anxiety
my sideblogs r @clearingthroat (vents/gore), @against-life-as-a-symptom (art, though i also post art here), @d1lemmaaa (kjrp), and @gerard-ways-right-sock (mostly made that bc there's a left sock blog lmao)
im also a therian!!! my theriotypes are a jaguar, a black jaguar, and a northern long-eared bat :] feel free to ask about them!
my blog is matching with my friend, @gay-little-freak!!
i went to one more time tour and saw ptv and blink-182 7/11/24
i lovelovelove music!!! lots of different types!! i have my headphones on pretty much 24/7, you'll never see me with em off hehe
i have lots of favorite bands!! in no specific order, they're my chemical romance, pierce the veil, blink 182, hozier, green day, tv girl, lemon demon, system of a down, slipknot, leathermouth, frank iero and the cellabration, mailpup, salv the dog, s3rl, sodikken, weezer, ghost, femtanyl, insane clown posse, simple plan, fall out boy, and h3artcrush :33
my favorite genres r emo music and loudloudloud stuff that i can blow my eardrums out with!!!!
please send music recommendations x3
my current and past hyperfixations:
fnaf, gore, cannibalism, lobotomies, mcr, olms, plushies, ranboo, dsmp (this was like 4 years ago don't execute me please), furries, dinosaurs
tags:
#thoughts : my og posts!!
#horny for frank iero : uh. i think this one is somewhat self explanatory :')
#asks : any asks people send me!!! (please send me asks ily)
i started doing these after i started posting, so its technically not all of my posts.
DNI:
homophobes/transphobes, ableists, zoophiles, racists, incest, and other basic dni. that includes assholes.
other random stuffs!!!
-my favorite color is neon green
-my favorite animals are snakes and olms
-pleaseee use tonetags im really bad at deciphering things lol
-i love to draw and make things!! i make a lot of kandi and cosplays. lmk if you want to see any of my cosplays :3
-i have a youtube channel with 17.8k subscribers!! i dont like giving it out, but dm me if you want it :]
-i collect soda tabs and plushies
pictures of me, my killjoy oc, and blinkies/stamps below the cut!!!
this is me!!!!
my killjoy oc!!!!
DILEMMA DANGER!!! (name by @gay-little-freak :3)
dilemma is mostly based off of me, so we're kinda similar!!
pronouns: he/they
gender: male (trans)
sexuality: panromantic asexual
he lovessss music, and he plays the guitar xP
he wears this a lot!!!
this is what he looks like!!! i havent actually drawn them a full reference yet, i still need to. look out for that!!
i roleplay as him sometimes!!!
whenever a post is him talking, itll be set up like this:
text goes here
-dilemma danger
sometimes it wont have the "-dilemma danger" part, but only if ive already stated it earlier in the conversation :]
he is a MAJOR crash king. he has a singular brain cell and he does not use it hehe
hes got sharp teeth and a dirty blonde fluffy mullet that usually covers his eyes.
he actually is very good at fighting, when he needs to be!!
hes tall and lanky and has a diagonal scar from his cheek to his nose from a clap with some dracs.
he hatesssss firefights and hes not very good at shooting, so he usually carries around a knife! he still uses his gun though, just not often.
he likes zone five the most and is debating finding a place there to live, but he currently lives on the cusp of zone three and four.
he does have a group, but im still developing them :]
BLINKIES!!!
thanks for reading :D this ended up really long hehe
27 notes
·
View notes
Not Your Classic Vigilante [Ch. 8]
Alternate Dimension AU
TW: Language, Mentions of Death, Descriptions of Violence, Scar Mention, Mentioned Body Horror
CW: OC Use, See the OC Guide [Here]
Genre: Angst, Light Comedy
Pairing: Batfamily x Batsis!Reader
(8/?) [First] | [Previous] | [Next]
[DC Masterlist] | [Not Your Classic Vigilante Masterlist]
YN Pronouns: Female (She/Her)
Word Count: 3.8K
Notes: It's time for my bi-annual update of this bad boy LMAOOOOOOO see y'all in another half a year! (I'm kidding, I'll try to get more updates out before the year ends if my schedule permits lmaooo) Seriously, though, thanks to anyone who stuck it out even though I'm not a good updater! I really appreciate you all <3
Not Your Classic Vigilante: @gabytodd @peachydoki @marshmallow12435 @f0leysgurl @luminaaz @lolsnack @akuri-shinsou @pansinspace @time-shardz @lovely-maryj
Disclaimer: This series is originally by @fandom-meanderer who is a close friend of mine, but she has since fallen out of her Tumblr days and asked me to finish a few series for her, hence why I am now in ownership of the Not Your Classic Vigilante series, I hope I can still live up to her writing as I rewrite this series! (I promise not to change too much, hehe)
28 July 2022
As you’d probably expected, your slumber did not last long, as you was reminded of why you had a hard time sleeping in the first place. Of course it’d come back to you in such a vivid way, now that you’ve returned home and back to the crime scene. You wondered how different it looked now, or if any of your belongings remained there after so long.
Your nightmares were always the same, back in that horrific alleyway. Three years, and you still haven’t forgotten. Three years, and you can still feel everything. Three years, and you can still remember looking up to the sky and seeing that all too familiar smoggy sky. You can still remember, and recite from heart, the prayer you sent out to whatever god was out there to just end your suffering there. And, as your pursuer pulled on your hair, you would always wake up, your mind sparing you from reliving all of that trauma and, usually, you’d decide to work instead, but this time the circumstances were different.
‘Another nightmare?’
‘If nightmares are all I have then I’d rather not sleep at all.’
‘Tea, darling.’
‘Yeah, yeah, I know, I just wish you were here, it’d be easier. Think you can walk me through that miracle recipe you usually make?’
‘Of course, why would I say no?’ Alex’s voice drained from your head and you made your way to the manor kitchen, ignoring the light in the library this time as you continued. ‘I’m sure you’ll have all the basics. Milk, honey, lemon, and whatever tea is available.’
You had always thought that the manor was too quiet at night like there were demons in the shadows and monsters in the closets. You remember that you used to wake up either Dick or Jason to come downstairs with you when you were younger. Dick, of course, always said yes no matter how tired he was, Jason would tease you about it and get upset but in the end, he’d follow, you always relied on them to scare the demons away, and, now that you thought of it, you weren’t sure what kind of demon would be afraid of a boy in bright spandex but that was beside the point.
Then you got older, you got older and suddenly you had your own younger siblings to watch over. You had to be the person to chase their demons away, but at that time, you had nothing aside from a flashlight. You remembered asking yourself if something were to happen, would you be defending your younger siblings or would they be defending you? You, a civilian, and them, the vigilantes. Hell, you were pretty sure your dad was friends with some demons.
‘And now the demons hide from you.’
‘Very funny, Alex. Once we’re back together no more prying into my thoughts, alright?’
‘I wouldn’t pry if you were so loud.’
‘You’re insufferable.’
'I just want to brighten up your mood a little, darling. Unclench your jaw.’ You didn’t even realize that you were until he mentioned it. You scoured the fridge and pulled out the required ingredients.
‘I’m not keeping you up, am I?’
‘Goodness, no, you could never. I’m just checking things on my end. We have what we need, when you’re ready, we can head home.’
‘I’m just worried that it was too easy. Nothing ever is with this family.’
‘Let’s just consider it a blessing, for now. We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it otherwise.’
‘Right,’ you shook your head. ‘Have you located Cass yet?’
‘Cassandra is as elusive as ever. Carter and I have been keeping an eye out for her, though.’
‘Good, I think she’s the only one we really have to look out for,’ you looked over your shoulder. Your sister had a knack for stealth, one that you had been aware of since now. But, it wasn’t her famed stealth that concerned you, no, of everyone in this damned family, it will be her to find out that you’re lying. You were lucky enough to have landed here when she wasn’t at the house, otherwise, you’d be screwed.
‘We’re waiting outside for you. Whenever you’re ready.’
‘You’re outside? Be careful, I forgot to tell you both earlier about the traps.’
‘Oh, trust us, we know.’
~
Two Hours Earlier.
“Don’t move, don’t move,” Alex hisses to Carter, who was probably in the most uncomfortable position he’d ever been in.
“I’m not moving, dammit,” Carter takes slow breaths. “Thank god his highness made us play Twister with him so often.” He holds his position steady between the number of lasers that had suddenly sparked to life. “What’s our situation, Lex?”
“Best case scenario they’d slice one of our limbs off if we’re clumsy.”
“That’s the best case?”
“The worst case scenario is that they trip the alarm system and suddenly we’d have this Universe’s strongest family on our tails.
“Great,” Carter groans. “You know a lot about the Captain’s family don’t you?”
“I do,” Alex tries to turn slowly to a more favorable position. “You know, you could just call her (Y/N).”
“She outranks me though.”
“We worked together, she just happened to figure out the system faster than we did,” Alex sighs. “I also know you two have a certain... relation, if I may presume.” Carter nearly loses his balance, saving his position by grabbing onto a nearby flower pot.
“Fuck, wait, are you serious?!” Carter whips his head towards him with wide eyes. Alex only nods calmly, keeping his movements short as a red laser was right in front of his eyes.
“I wasn’t 100% sure, but considering your reaction, I can say that I am more confident,” he says. “You make a sweet duo.”
“Ugh… we were so careful,” Carter sighs.
"Not careful enough, hard to hide things from someone who's known her since we were seven," Alex scoffs. “Anyway, I do like you, Carter, you're one of the few people in the Brigade I'd consider a friend, so, with your best interests in mind, be sure to be on the watch for his highness. He might order for your head if he finds out,” Alex says with a teasing tone to his voice.
“Alex, please tell me that you’re not planning on using this against me, are you?”
“That depends on your future actions,” Alex grins.
“I’m so fucked.”
~
‘Oh, and do be sure to shut down the lasers, please, I think Carter’s getting a muscle cramp.’ You could easily picture his smirk.
Alex’s side went silent and you reveled in the quiet. You never liked this telepathy thing, it was always so violating in your mind, and truthfully in his too. You both tried to avoid it until absolutely necessary, such as now. It was a by-product of your own curious case of two souls interlinked to allow for eternal life, or, at least, until Alex dies. You paused, half waiting for him to say something, mainly to correct you, but no such thing came.
Courtesy of the ruthless queen, she always held it above your head, how indebted you were to her. If there was truly one person you hated, it was her. Even your father’s stance, as absolute as it was before, paled in comparison to the queen and the leash she had around your neck. You were certain that she was somehow keeping tabs on you even here, after all, to move without knowledge of her majesty is akin to treason.
You really should be more careful. As they say, it comes in threes. You’ve died once here, you’ve died once in the other world, and the next one is bound to be your last chance. You shook your head.
“I hope Alfred didn’t move anything since I was last here,” you mumbled to yourself. It would do you well not to think about it right now, you should be more focused on the mission. Like you said earlier, it was too easy.
“He didn’t,” Tim confirms. You glanced over your shoulder and Tim smiles softly. “That used to scare the heck out of you.” Tim and Cass were, in some ways, too similar, as much as they’d argue against it. The only difference between them was that one didn’t hesitate. Ever.
“Not anymore, I guess,” you respond. You pull out a tea packet and fill the water heater to its maximum.
“Hope you don’t mind if I join you.” He walks into the kitchen and pulls out a mug.
“Of course, I wouldn’t, let’s have a conversation, Timmy,” you nodded toward him, waiting for the water to heat. “Why are you still up?”
“Bruce asked me to go through some files, just some review stuff,” he answers. “Have you spoken to him?”
“Something like that.”
“I’m not sure if anyone told him.”
“I could tell,” you rubbed the back of your neck awkwardly. The water heater finished and you swiftly poured it into your and Tim’s mugs.
“Whatcha drinking?” He asks, nudging your shoulder. It was something he always used to do when you were younger. He was testing you. You nudged him back.
“Just something I saw on Pinterest.”
‘It’s like I don’t exist to you,’ Alex chides. You pay him no mind.
“Smells good,” he says. You both take a seat at the counter, silently blowing the steam away from the tops while seemingly trying to find out what to say to the other. Strange, you’d never thought that you’d feel awkward around Tim of all your siblings, yet here you were, with your words caught in your throat.
“How are you, Tim?” You finally ask. Tim taps his mug a couple of times, looking off into nothing while he thought of his response.
“I’ve been better, (Y/N), and you?” He tosses the question back.
“I’ve been better,” you repeated. “Crazy… everything that I found out today, and no doubt more, huh?” You ask. Tim could only nod.
“A lot has changed, (Y/N), I don’t even know where to start,” he shakes his head. “It’s okay though, right? We’ll have a lot of time to spend together,” Tim says with a small smile. Your chest clenched. Ah, Tim, what a horrible habit of his. You were worried that he already had you figured out. Had you slipped up somewhere? A mannerism you hadn’t done before?
‘Stop clutching your heart,’ Alex’s voice rang. Your hand dropped to your lap.
“I see there’s a new Robin,” you answered before Tim could get suspicious.
“Oh, no, Duke’s Robin trial’s over. He’s Signal now,” Tim explains.
“Another kid who fell victim to dad’s charms, huh?” You drank some of your tea, feeling your thoughts relax afterward.
“Something like that,” Tim mutters. “But, (Y/N)… there’s something different about you.” This conversation again. You had to stay on your guard, everything you say and everything you do can and will be used against you. Leave it to Timmy, always the skeptic.
“I mean… you know what happened,” you sighed. “Where’s Cassie?” You divert the conversation.
“Last I heard she’s helping out at Steel City,” Tim hums. “I should call her over,” he reaches for his phone, but you shake your head. Anyone but Cass.
“It’s fine, sounds like she’s busy, like you said, we have a lot of time to figure things out. I’m just proud,” you grinned. “I’m proud of all of you, looks like you’ve all been doing your best since I’ve been gone and… that makes me really glad,” you nudged his leg with your foot and he looks up from his coffee to you, a sudden grief in his eyes. You were telling the truth. You were worried about Tim more so than your other brothers actually, of them all, he was the most prone to overthinking.
“What do you think?” Tim suddenly asks. You freeze.
‘He asked if you feel any different,’ Alex fills in for you.
“I’m not sure, Tim,” you sighed. “I feel like myself but, at the same time, not at all. I saw the news reports already, so… do you think…?” You looked down at your hands. Now, to be perfectly honest, you’ve thought about this before, plenty of times actually. This body you’re in, is it actually yours?
“I mean… if I may,” Tim moves his chair so he can be a little closer to you and reaches for your hand. Instinctively, you pull away and Tim’s breath hitches.
“Sorry… muscle memory maybe,” you tried to cover for your actions, placing your hand on his instead. Tim holds it gently, observing your wrist in particular, but ghosting his hands around yours entirely. You gave him your non-dominant hand for a reason. You couldn’t come up with an excuse to explain the calluses on your sword hand. “You have scar marks all around your wrist here,” he says, tracing the faint outline of the jagged cut made into it. As he did so, it was like you could feel the sharp pain from before. “Your hand was the first one they found, you know,” he suddenly says, a sharp tone switch. Again, you pulled your hand away, rubbing your wrist softly now.
“So I’ve heard,” you muttered.
“They never found your torso.”
“And yet, here it is,” you said next. He’s testing your answers now. It’s too late to act afraid. “That’s why, I had a nightmare last night, a body without a torso was running towards me,” you lied. Tim frowned, taking a sip of his drink before continuing.
“I wonder… is your situation similar to Jason’s? Or is it completely different?” He says aloud.
“Well… I don’t think I turned into an asshole, so I’m pretty sure I’m different,” you laughed. Tim broke a small chuckle.
“That’s true, that’s true,” he nods. “How do you feel about this, (Y/N)? About coming back to life and all?” Tim seems to have relaxed.
“I mean… it’s strange. You know my thoughts on death,” you mumbled. “I’m a bit glad, though. Maybe this was a gift, you know? I still have to pick up my degree from the university, I wonder if they kept it,” you rest your head against your palm now.
“Your degree?” Tim asks.
“Yeah? You know I went to college, right?” You looked at him with disbelief.
“Well, yeah, of course, I know that!” Tim defends tiredly. “It’s just… did you not see it earlier? Bruce hung it over the mantle,” Tim points to the general area of the living room and your eyes widened slightly. You didn’t even notice that.
“Oh… I guess it slipped my mind, I was too busy looking at your Boy Wonder pictures,” you chided.
“Whatever, I keep telling Alfred to move those, it’s so embarrassing,” Tim grows slightly red before his smile falls again as if remembering something else. What was he thinking right now? What was going on inside that head of his?
“Tim, are you okay?”
“Yeah… yeah, I’m fine,” he nods his head unsurely. He looks back down at his coffee. “No… No, I’m not,” he corrects himself. You hesitated before putting your hand on his shoulder.
“Hey, do you want to talk about it? Is it my fault?” You asked. Maybe your sudden reappearance shocked him, or maybe you were wrong, maybe he hadn’t been holding up well.
“I just… (Y/N), I want to trust you, really I do,” he says, meeting your eyes once again. “But there’s something different about you, something I can’t really point out,” he shakes his head. He looks away again for a brief moment, as if in thought, then he looks at you, his eyes filled with the determination to solve the case that was you. “Who are you?”
“Timmy,” whatever warning tone was in your voice wasn’t intentional. Your hand moved up to his face, holding it as gently as possible. “I knew you’d be the first to find out.” You whispered. “And I’m so sorry, I love you, you’re my little brother but… I have to do this, please understand. It’s nothing personal…” In an instant, you slammed his head against the table, leaving him knocked out.
‘Well, that can only work once,’ Alex chides.
“I know,” you chugged down the rest of your drink. “Let’s get out of here.” You rushed out to the gardens. Dammit, you knew it, why did you entertain him? Five minutes, no, less. You had to get out of here as soon as possible. You spot your two teammates, both in compromising positions that they should care less about right now. “Don’t even worry about the security system! Let’s just go!” You shout, already configuring the device around your wrist. You heard doors slamming behind you, shouts or rushed speech, you didn’t have time to differentiate. The alarm system blared, no doubt a wake-up call, and the sudden lights that shot into the night sky, without a doubt, was to call the patrolling vigilantes back home.
“Ready when you are, captain!” Alex shouts. You couldn’t ignore the stares you felt. Which sibling was it?
“Count of three!” You shout. It can’t be Dick or Jason, they would’ve said something by now.
“Three!” Alex shouts. Tim was still knocked out, knowing him, he’d be hanging behind on the cams but a quick glance earlier showed that the garden cameras were fried beyond repair.
“Two!” Carter was next. Damian? No, can’t be, he would’ve reacted similarly to your older brothers, surely.
“One!” The three of you slammed your hands on the devices, a vortex quickly pulling you into your home universe.
The three of you tumbled onto the concrete floors of the Keep, your back slamming harshly against the table that, of course, Nixon finally bolted to the ground. Carter hit the wall, sending displayed weapons crashing down. And, as expected, Alex landed as gracefully as ever, standing up nearly immediately to brush the dirt off his uniform.
And, just like that, all your exhaustion caught up to you. The constant acting, the running around Gotham, running around the manor, and even the stress of your family. All in the span of two days, you deserved a vacation after even just looking at your father, that man just knew how to drain the life out of you. If you could, you’d rather sleep right where you were. Your lumbar vertebra only slightly fractured from the sheer force of hitting the table, but, give it a couple of minutes and it’ll be fine again.
As much as you hated to admit it, it made you feel better now that you were in a more familiar place. One that you felt comfortable in, at the very least. Sure, you spent the majority of your waking hours working in this place, but it was better than the stares you got over the two days you were at the manor. For once, these ugly concrete floors felt welcoming.
“Well, that went swimmingly, didn’t it?” Alex grins. You and Carter could only groan in response. You held up the flash drive regardless and Alex takes it from your hand. Then, as soon as the tingling feeling in your legs subsided, you took deep breaths.
“It almost went too well,” you shook your head against the cold floors. You pushed yourself up using the edge of the table. “Ugh… I’m beat, I’m going home,” you waved your hand absently.
“Oh, don’t forget to take lover boy with you,” Alex points to Carter.
“Huh? Oh, yeah, Carter, I’ll give you a ride,” you beckoned him with your hand.
“Oh, nah, it’s fine,” Carter shakes his hand.
“Okay, better for me, just walk,” you grabbed your keys from the counter, taking a glance at the clock next to you. “Oh shit,” you grabbed the digital device.
“What’s wrong?” Alex asks.
“It’s been two weeks here!” You shout. “Fuck! There’s going to be so much paperwork!” You ruffled your hair harshly.
“Ah, and so the captain faces her hardest battle yet,” Alex laughs, grabbing the door for you, “deadlines.”
“I can and will kill you, Alex.”
~
Cassandra stood at the top of Wayne Manor. Her knuckles had turned white from how hard she was gripping the chimney top. Maybe she shouldn’t have been lurking, but when Jason suddenly texted the group chat she knew she had to come immediately. But, when she saw you sitting in the living room, just waiting for your brothers to return, all the warning signals flew up in her mind.
Threat, thief, murderer, soldier, suspicious, trained, dangerous, and god knows how more. Cassandra couldn’t believe it, no, she didn’t want to believe it. You were just sitting there, how could you set off all those alarms in her head? Wait, how could you do that? You weren’t supposed to show those to her. You were supposed to be happy, relaxed, calm, excited, or maybe even worried or concerned. But, there was one signal that kept popping up over and over again in Cass’ head.
Liar.
You acted just like (Y/N), you looked just like her, you sounded just like her, but every subliminal thing about you was not (Y/N) Wayne. But, underlying all of those, was fear. Were you maybe keeping things to yourself? Was it to protect the family? Why?
Why did you steal those files from the bat computer? Cassandra saw all of it, staying hidden in the shadows just as she was taught, she watched you upload details on who knows how many heroes into a simple flash drive, and how that was possible, Cass didn’t know. The security system should’ve fried that drive and alerted Tim or Barbara as soon as you pushed it into its port but it didn’t.
Yet, you knew the password. She saw you. You typed in the correct password, but you hesitated. Why did you hesitate? Why would you? It’s not like Bruce had ever changed it from your birthday. For a computer harboring so many secrets, the password to access it was just so simple. Your initials, underscore, then your birthday. Two capitals and no spaces. Not just anyone knew that password, Cass had only found out off-hand when, surprise, she watched Bruce put it in. Perhaps it was what she read off of you when you typed in your password. Anxious, and maybe even melancholic. Why would an imposter feel sad about a password? There would be no reason.
It was that reasoning that convinced Cass that you were, truly, you. Just with different life experiences, maybe. More experiences than death certainly. She only overheard it, your story about the lab. But when you said that, all your body language indicated were lies. How different could it have been, though? What happened to suddenly change your mannerisms fundamentally?
Did it, maybe, have something to do with your heart? Why did you continue to clutch it so throughout the short time you were in the manor?
Cass had too many questions, all of which she’d know would go unanswered. Now, just as she watched you disappear with two unknown figures, she could only feel her knees buckle while she sat against the roof tiles.
She didn’t even get to say ‘hello.’
198 notes
·
View notes