#hes kind of...girlfailure

[cryptcoop]

Guess what I watched

[patheticpomegranite]

reigen is such an awesome character because he is so charismatic and hot and cool but he is also the biggest lamest loser known to man who always makes ugly expressions and has never felt the touch of a woman or man.

[macdenlover]

we don’t acknowledge enough how dee used to be a pageant winner when she was a kid and how much damage it did to her. she worked her ass off and got recognition for being pretty and talented at a young age and it was the only source of self esteem she could garner in a family that constantly berated and talked down to her. she sought after that external approval because it was the only way she could prove everyone around her wrong. her dream of being a performer didn’t come from a self-aggrandizing delusion— she genuinely showed a lot of potential when she was younger. but she went through an unflattering puberty and her spinal condition got worse and that natural talent she had as a kid plateaued way too early. the “former gifted kid” dilemma. she slowly lost the thing that promised her that she was good, but she was so desperate to keep holding onto it that she tried anyway. again and again and again no matter how much people made fun of her because it was always about proving them wrong. but after a while she couldn’t jump anymore without anticipating the way it feels when she hits the ground face first. self-sabotage became her way out, choosing to rather live in the fantasy of her own unrealized potential and blaming those around her for her lack of success, than having tried and crashed again. she’d rather buy lottery tickets over and over and never scratch off the numbers than to see that she lost. that self-sabotaging behavior bled into other aspects of her life too, from friendships to relationships to therapy. her own short lived success is what made her grow into embodying the cycle of failure.

[camembri]

ace's first on screen presence has him wearing both a jacket and a black hat, making him both the most clothed we ever see him and also demonstrating that he clearly has different colours of the same hat for different occasions. realistically this choice was deliberate by the animation studio to make him look more mysterious, giving him a recognisable motif whilst simultaneously building intrigue and not spoiling the whole fire power thing but. what's the in-universe explanation. he doesn't know there's an audience. this leads me to believe that he donned this outfit in a deliberate attempt to screw with Luffy and be all mysterious and psych Luffy out by pretending there's some guy following him (except it didn't work because he'd already left Drum). first of all - peak older siblingism. second of all he's sooo extra I'm surprised he didn't wear that same black hat when confronting Blackbeard to set the mood better. third of all do you think it's actually a different hat or did he spend the time between alabasta and drum painstakingly peeling paint off of the orange one. much to think about...

[yippee-optimistically]

there is a shockingly low amount of tmnt on this blog for how long ive been into it. big tmnt'12 dump bc ive been trying to binge it recently

general sibling interactions.. very attatched to the idea of karai getting to be their sibling + i was so sleepy i kept thinking abt the turtles brumating

more sibling karai. thought itd be funny if bc of the yokai/time travel ep when mikey did that weird dance at baby karai he was implanted in her brain as an automatic Favorite. hes so peculiar

read this fic abt the aftermath of shellacne. the last line from donnie has been repeated by my sibling since i sent it to them

ougugghhh into dimension x you are so famous to everyoneee.. 1st one is me thinking abt how mikey had to be So insane to get a KRAANG SKULL? strange guy. and i dont remember which one but i read a fic where mikey's breathing apparatus breaks n he ends up getting used to the dim x air and um. consequences back on earth

RENET!!!!!!!!!!! renet tilley you are SO FAMOUS TO ME milf shirt is bc april in s3e1 really makes it sound like mikey was the only one doing house chores. cooking cleaning caring for animals etc. single mom

!!!! concept for a weirrrddddd savage mikey rep thatd be in his head in Journey To The Center of Mikeys Mind. was thinking that instead of being outside in that checker floor area, hed stick around core mikey. protecting him n protecting that last bit of childhood innocence. hed stand very tall and intimidating. core probably wouldnt even really know where he came from?? smth abt the brain blocking out traumatic memories. i like him

tang shen aus... more specifically inspired by this fic that i need to finish catching up on.. mikey and karai sibling relationship is so special 2 meee

2012 LEO YOU ARE EVERYTHING 2 MEEEE wishing so bad we got to see more of him and mikey.. mikey and his brothers ... ougghhhhh

and a little bit of smth from a personal iteration im working on ... definitely excited to post abt them once i have more solid outfits designed

[robobrainrot]

Enjoy some traditional Mirage Doodles because I'm sick in bed but still live up to my username 🤖💙

[jrueships]

Paul George on Stephen A. Smith’s Kawhi Leonard jab: “I didn’t like that moment… Kawhi wants to play… We exhausted a lot out of Kawhi this season. So at some point your body breaks you down… I didn’t appreciate that moment. I know I laughed because the situation was lighthearted, but deep down it was like you gotta let that go, Stephen A.”

Paul George, knight in shining armor

[evelynpr]

why are we, the spy x family fandom, not using this drawing of Loid by Endo everywhere

like come on, it evokes such emotion.

[moinsbienquekaworu]

Devastating news: my brother is a normal person. It doesn't run in the family, I'm just a weird freak for no reason

[raythefool]

me seeing two characters interact once and proceeding to immediately create a plotline in my head that i will obsess over for the next hour and a half of my life

[scholarlycoffee]

Leona Adsit is truly one of the characters of all time. She had comphet so bad it killed her. She pined after a wildly unattainable aroace autistic man who became her platonic life partner after he was nearly framed for murder. She’s so scared of conflict that she only managed to hold a grudge against the person who killed her for like a week. She’s an American living on an English island with people speaking in some of the wildest accents and she just pretends to understand what they’re saying. She’s from Illinois. She’s a college dropout who hyperfocused on a murder mystery so hard that she actually solved it. She’s stuck reliving a time loop of the hit 1989 sitcom Saved by the Bell. No one is doing it like her!

[omagpies]

why did swap!jimmy crash the ship?

(@thatonegaycactus)

the lore for this au is that jimmy and anya have actually already met back on earth, in a bar somewhere, before curly brought jimmy on the tulpar as his intern. so meeting again was a surprise for both of them! they kind of sort of picked up where they left off even though anya was very much uncertain about having a workplace relationship with a subordinate, but jimmy pushed and blackmailed her with exactly that into keeping it on the DL, their relationship progressively becoming less and less consensual (she failed her pilot certification exams eight times and surely even PE won't want such a girlfailure on their roster once they Find Out what she's been up to)

and then, of course, anya gets pregnant (she has come to curly asking about contraceptives before. later he will look back on this conversation and torture himself for not realising what was going on), and i'm ironing out the details on the Why jimmy crashes the ship but it has to be, as usual, a perception of anya as a threat to the life he's trying to build, severe mental health issues, desperation, and a creative take on what 'fixing it' means. all he has to do is nick the key when swansea is off his shift and anya is distracted -- after that, it doesn't take a piloting genius to find another window and steer the ship into a large obstacle.

(more roleswap au)

[yunsound]

The Third Installment to the Oubing Saga- Yunbing

PRIOR EXPERIENCE NEEDED!

Entry ticket: reading this post and acknowledging that the following is about to be 18+. No, I'm not writing anything explicit, but it's going to be some mentions of sex. Move on.

After finishing Ne Zha 2025 (or the 2019 version if you're a real one), did you feel overcome by the gayness? Did you wonder why the fuck anyone would ever look at their best friend like that? Did shoujo anime music start playing in the back of your head?

...yeah you're not alone.

As previously mentioned, Oubing is currently China's biggest fandom ship (I stay hopeful that this wave of hype will last longer than it did in 2019). I also trust that you all understand why that is.

Seriously, I've never seen any piece of Chinese media except for straight up BL THIS gay.

Let's count on one hand how many BL tropes these movies include.

Red/blue

Soulmates

Only friend

Enemies to lovers

Friends to lovers

Oh oops, we ran out of fingers! Next hand.

Friends to enemies to friends to lovers

Forbidden romance

Demon x angel

Two halves of one... thing

...bondage? I suppose? If you know you know THE scene.

Oh wow look at that we ran out of fingers again. MOVING ON TO THE NEXT HAND-

Okay, I'll stop here. All of this makes Oubing technically a very vanilla ship (ignore the bondage that's mostly a joke. Though you WILL see a lot of art involving Ne Zha's red sash in... different usages) and very sweet. Pure love, I suppose.

Do you know about Shangmei Oubing, a variation on Oubing featuring different adaptations of Ne Zha and Ao Bing? Well now you do. Read this post to figure out what I'm talking about.

If there's a spectrum of the wholesome-ness of Oubing ships, Shangmei Oubing is in the middle. Yes, it's very toxic, but technically Ne Zha does really love Ao Bing a lot, just in the wrong ways.

On the OPPOSITE end of that spectrum, we have Yunbing.

Yunbing is the ship between Ne Zha and Ao Bing from the 2021 movie New Gods Reborn: Ne Zha. The movie itself is on Netflix- it's kind of a mid movie, I'm NGL, but the animation is pretty good.

I haven't watched the whole movie (how do I know it's mid? Because I saw some clips and they made me sigh out loud) so I'm maybe not the most reliable critic, but it's just not peak storytelling, okay?

Yunbing is 80% made TF up (headcanon ships are the best ships) because in the movies they hate each other, like TRUE hate, not gay hate. I'm talking GENERATIONAL hating.

If you ignore canon, though, (my favourite thing to do), you are left with Yunbing, which is honestly really fucking yummy.

Here's a quick overview of the background and dynamic of the ship/movie/characters without spoiling the plot of the movie.

The main character of the movie is called Li Yunxiang (remember that Ne Zha's dad is Li Jing, so technically his full name is Li Nezha prior to him fucking himself up via sashimi-ing his flesh from his bones).

Li Yunxiang is the reincarnation of Ne Zha in a modern setting in the fictional East Sea City (Donghai City). He doesn't know or remember being Ne Zha. He works as a deliveryman I think, or a smuggler or something low-paying and dangerous I think.

In East Sea City, water is in shortage due to the Dragon Clan (now a rich family business) hoarding it. The third son of this Dragon Clan (his name is De San) is, you guessed it, the reincarnated Ao Bing.

Actually I'm not sure if he's reincarnated or if he's just been here the whole time hating.

De San, unlike our polite nice Ao Bing from Ne Zha 2019/2025, or the terrified victim Ao Bing from Shangmei, is a huge bitch. He's also a girlfailure. He's not some mass-murdering psychopath, but he's a spoiled rich brat who lives and breathes capitalism and privilege.

Look at his stupid face. Isn't he punchable? No, despite the blonde hair, the director has confirmed he isn't mixed or foreign, he's just an idiot who bleached his hair.

He was supposed to be some sort of dominant playboy daddy character but the entire nation of China just immediately saw the potential for girlfailure brat bottom and I guess that's where my brain went too.

After Ne Zha pulled his tendons out, his dad paid some SERIOUS money to make him a mechanical tendon. Let me tell you I don't know why but this shot of his metal spine is SO fucking sexy

Sorry for thirsting on main, IDK what it is but it's getting to me.

De San still wants revenge on Ne Zha for pulling his fucking tendons out so he spends like 10000 hours trying his very best to kick Li Yunxiang's (confused) ass and never manages to get there, it's so funny.

See, the main reason this ship is so delicious is the dynamic, not their interactions because this is ACTUAL hate, I'm talking they'd kill each other in an instant with NO hesitation. The sexual tension is through the roof. Okay, they're both straight, but you DON'T HAVE TO BELIEVE IN THAT DOCTRINE.

Mild spoiler alert!

There's a scene in which Li Yunxiang gets one over De San by making him crash his car. As De San goes flying out of the car in intense pain, he glances over at Yunxiang, who's looking back at him.

Instead of giving him a middle finger or a thumbs down, Yunxiang fucking gives him a finger heart. IK it's supposed to be mocking but it's so funny, especially the BLATANT rage on De San's face afterwards.

The appeal of this ship is just the hate sex. This is a ship 100% meant for gooners, if you'd prefer sweet vanilla hand-holding and blushing you probably want to go back to regular Oubing.

Why does De San have such pillow princess potential? First of all, look at him. What the fuck is that waist to shoulder to leg ratio?

Second, in the Cantonese dub, he calls his father (Ao Guang) "daddy" (in English btw). Sorry, what? You are a twenty-something year old fully grown man. It is fairly common for rich Cantonese people to call their father daddy (according to my rich Cantonese friend) but it's a little much.

Third, he's such a failure it's hilarious. Spoiler alert: there's a whole scene in which his father calls him a failure and he's like "wait what". He's kind of dumb and pathetic despite being arrogant and proud.

Very princess-like. Chinese version of Drarry, basically. They also both really like cars! TBH if they weren't Ao Bing and Ne Zha's reincarnations they'd probably be really good friends.

Generations of hating each other is such gay behaviour, WHY is that other man on your mind over thousands of years??

Some of the popular headcanons for Yunbing:

Yunxiang calls De San "third princess" or "princess" because he's such a... princess

In the middle of like, fistfighting each other they somehow transition to having sex without knowing how

De San slaps Yunxiang in the face and he's like "on the other side too"

"Only I can be the one to kill him, fuck off!" *surprised look* "No that's not what I meant-"

Inappropriate usage of the metal spine (which is probably more sensitive and delicate...?)

I recommend, if you're looking for Oubing content (of the decidedly not workplace friendly variety) and if you like ENEMIES to lovers (emphasis on the enemies part) that you go through the AO3 Yunbing tag (云冰, I'll link the AO3 tag here directly).

If you want recs please ask me, I am so passionate about all three iterations of Oubing.

To quote a XHS user:

Oubing: Pure love

Shangmei Oubing: Pure fear

Yunbing: Pure hate

[notpixl]

HSR Character Drabbles (Ft. The Stellaron Hunters & The IPC)

Had to change the title since like the realizing part is kind of restricting my headcanoning ahh and I want to just-

Your honor just kill me I just wanna write 🫠

GN!Reader as per usual

And if there was a Title to describe this whole bananza then it’s: What do they do when they’re in love with You?

But it feels… you know what? Just enjoy this mess.

Also! Established Relationships for Topaz and Aventurine. I would’ve gone insane by the time I had something for them that isn’t in the relationship phase…

—————

———

—————

Kafka

She’s “somewhat” clingy

Been like this ever since she’s laid her eyes on you

You just bring a… certain charm that makes her enamored

And this feeling soon devolved into something more…

I wouldn’t say worse but…

It reaches to the point where she cherishes every moment with you

Be it longer hugs

Her hands intertwined with yours at any chance she gets

Or a few more minutes just so she can lay in bed you a little bit longer (the whole one room one bed is orchestrated by her, of course)

You’re just…

Mm…

She just wants to be with you

Every second

Smile for her, will you? Just once? It’ll get her going

Silver Wolf

Holed up in her room

Otome games stacked beside her

Reading text at near light speeds as if it isn’t even difficult

And once she meets her own reflection from the end credits…

She concludes that it isn’t enough

…she wants everything to go right

Not to make an embarrassment of herself

It has her spiraling downwards and staying up for days until you’re told by Kafka to check in on her

Her eyes flutter open

Words of concern spill out of your mouth

She’s not even listening to you

Just…

Wondering if these hands on her shoulders are real or not

Thankfully she does get ahold of her senses and willingly heads to bed

Not before having more… thoughts

Damn can she be just normal for once-

Tip for Boss: Give her a hug

Blade

Sort of good news…?

He’s in love

Bad news?

He’s in love

He goes to such lengths in distancing himself from you, often taking missions that��ll definitely take a month or two to finish…

It’s only when Elio and Kafka step in with these countless missions that he begrudgingly takes in your presence again

Though… some part of him appreciates your company

Even if one day you…

Well…

Let’s just ignore that for a second

All that matters now…

Is that you’re here

Side note: Ruffle his hair at least once or twice a week.

Pretty please.

Firefly

She’ll be fine she says!

Cues to her trying to get a grip of everything the moment you wave at her

Firefly is… a mess to put it at words

Girlfailure if you will

From spacing out just by calling her name or her brain needing a reboot when you hold her hand

Heck, even Kafka and Silverwolf are teasing her about this!

But… she isn’t afraid to improve

Because one day

She’ll have the courage to…

To ask if you’re fine with eating cake rolls with her…

…

Doesn’t that just sound like a date-

Fun fact: She will stay still as a rock if you lay your head on her shoulder. Use this for whatever you want

Aventurine

Countless paper bags scattered across thr living room

You don’t deny these gifts of course it’s just…

You know

You’re not used to this

This amount of…

Appreciation

So, who would’ve thought that one day…

He decides to visit you!

Without warning!

…How did he even know your addre-

Right, your wallet…

That aside he’s just…

Standing there

Processing what’s in front of him right now

“…do you want more?”

“Wh-what?”

“Do you want a mansion instead?”

“Navi, can you get ahold of yourself please-

Call him nicknames. Makes him a tomato.

Topaz

Lap Pillows

And also Numby laying on your tummy

This has been an occasional thing whenever the weekend comes by

There’s also a switch in roles! And it happens quite often during weekdays when she comes home from work

Which lets you pepper her with kisses, leaving her a blushing mess afterwards

She’ll also fake getting sick just so she can be enveloped by your lovey dovey hugs just a bit longer

Though that always ends in her grumpily heading back to work…

“I miss my S/O, Numby…” She says as she closes the front door

Tip: If you kiss her then keep kissing her then make out and head to fourth base did you know she’ll be really needy an

Dr Ratio

After countless research and conducting…

Does he finally come up with a solution

…

A change in attitude

His rather… harsh demeanor would only lead to distancing yourself from him

Which explains itself very well in not having a chance at expressing his feelings for you

…but he’ll do what he can

Big or small

So long as you see him…

The way he sees you

Then writing this Thesis about Love isn’t so bad after all

I.E. Dr. Ratio turns soft for your sake and everyone else’s

…

“What’s this?”

“Tea. I thought you might need it for the gargantuous amount of paperwork.”

“Thanks… are you sure you aren’t possessed?”

“Why the assumption…?”

“You’re smiling.”

…

….

…

Yell at me if I did something bad for anyone in thi sob drabble :(

And that if this gets more than eleven likes I will have to acknowledge the fact that people like this

[applesscribbles]

Meet my new touchstarved oc!

This is Fig, she’s a faerie creature. Fig can be quite blunt at times but she means well and although she seems to be a quiet and mysterious type she’s actually very talkative once you stick around long enough. Kind of girlfailure vibes.

Fig hasn’t been living in Eridia for long, just about a year or so but she finds it easy to fit in with the main five LI…for the most part. She is often found around the markets in lowtown if not browsing then reading some fairytale in a dark corner.

Fig is pretty emotionally distant since she’s a faerie. She doesn’t feel things the same way others do but she tries her best to understand, especially when it comes to humans.

As for her relationship with each LI:

Kuras-

Fig likes Kuras but can be sort of skittish around him, whether that’s from a fear of doctors or something else completely no one’s really sure.

Leander-

Fig hates being around him. Something just seems off about him to her but she can’t say what for certain so she just tries to steer clear of him when she can without being obvious about it. Fig refuses to drink anything that he hands her.

Ais-

Fig’s relationship with Ais is odd to say the least. One minute they’re drinking together and the next Fig is threatening to kill him ( jokingly?). She does really like Princess though and often visits the Seaspring unannounced just to give her a treat.

Vere-

They don’t know each other very well since their lives are so different. Fig is a free spirit and tends to go wherever the wind takes her that day and for Vere well…we already know he can’t really do that. She likes his outfit though.

Mhin-

Fig is aware that Mhin doesn’t like her but awkwardly tries to befriend them which often only succeeds in making them dislike her even more but they also end up feeling oddly flustered? She’s trying her best.

I know this has been all pretty vague but that’s because I haven’t really fleshed out her backstory at all so all of the above might change but whateverrrr

Let me know if you’d like to see more of her!! (most likely you’ll be getting more regardless lol)

[limblesstar]

odysseus the line cook au

odysseus is a line cook, 40 years old, hasnt gotten a promotion in the decade hes worked there

coworker is diomedes, fresh(ish) out of culinary school, head chef , 27

odysseus is not very fond of this fact

its a fine dining restaurant, they do not act like it is.

boss is circe who cannot stand any of them,

their manager is hermes, he is chill with everything going on, doesnt really care as long as the kitchen is clean and they get dishes out. too busy smoking weed. could of had his own restaurant but didnt want the responsibility

married to penelope whos a professor in textile materials and technology, busy teaching and grading papers usually.

odysseus and diomedes have a very weird hot work situationship, his wife is very okay with it. odysseus is in love with him

theyre just bros, its not gay to fuck in the walk in freezer

what they do depends on the day and how much they can get away with.

penelope actually wants diomedes to move in so he 1. pays bills 2. she can pawn telemachus onto him 3. wants to know whats up

odysseus chain smokes on his break. he desperately wants to quit because his wife thinks its kind of gross and second hand smoke but he just cant kick the habit

lives in an apartment complex, absolute girlfailure.

poor relationship with father, could of been the greatest nepo baby but dropped out of his degree in commerce to go to culinary school

THIEF AND A LIAR

house is filled with equipment from his work, biggest thing hes stolen is a stand mixer that he convinced circe he threw out because it was broken. everything in his fridge is stored in a stolen quart container

doesnt steal any produce because he thinks its poor quality

ACTIVELY HATES CUSTOMERS

if diomedes wasn't there odysseus would be spitting in peoples food (he does it if the customers piss him off enough and if diomedes isnt looking)

maternal family has mob connections that he doesnt use (he can do it on his own)

on his off day he likes to bbq on his balcony to the displeasure of all his neighbours. hangs out with his son too