#hoard it in my inbox and never respond

[altruistic-meme]

ok ok ok so i’ve seen you on tumblr as a young royals blog BUT i didn’t realize till now that you’re the author of (why is there) joy in this poison which is actually one of my favorite aftg fics that i’ve read and i’ve read a great deal of aftg fics. kevin and neil’s dynamic in this story is EVERYTHING to me (much like it is in the series) and i absolutely adore how this story is going so far.

i could say more but i’ll leave it there for now hahaha

-miels 💜✨

replying to this 2 days later because i have literally been crying over it since i saw it hELLO THERE

thank you so much Miels!! ;;A;; i'm really really insanely glad you like (wit)jitp!!! it's been a lot of fun to write and there is so much more to go that im excited to get to eheh

top ways to make Abram cry every time: compliment character dynamics in their writing. no but really, i was actually sort of nervous when it came to Kevin and Nathaniel's relationship bc i wanted it to be natural and not too out of character of them while keeping in mind how different they are in this universe, and hearing that you like what it's become??? that is EVERYTHING to me!!!

you're incredibly sweet and i have been thinking about this ask for the last two days bc it's just. AAAA. im emotional. <3

[forestofsprites]

kind and lovely people who occasionally leave specific, kind and lovely asks in my inbox: i choose to archive those little bitches sometimes!! they're in there being treasured dragon-hoard style!! i appreciate them greatly but i could never respond to them publicly so they live in there. very safe very cozy very loved

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

Dearest Brainrot, I just wanted to tell you how much you mean to me! You’re one of (if not THE best) arcana fanfic/hc writers out there, and you really take time on each character!! Ilysm!! <3

Dear anon friend,

Thank you so much for this, I've really needed it!

I'm sorry it's taken so long to respond, I've been hoarding it in my inbox for rainy days and it never fails to lift my spirits ^.^

I'm so glad my effort is paying off - I really want to make sure that every M6 fan can find something nice here, and hopefully this means I've accomplished that. Your note means a lot to me, thank you for taking the time to send it!

Cheers -

brainrot

[sherifftillman]

as always, i'm not addressing the anonymous bullshit i've been getting in my inbox individually, if you want attention that bad then come up here and say it with your whole "face". but i will say as a blanket statement:

there is a difference between policing what people post vs asking them to be sensitive of common triggers. in asking people to tag any hoard content, i'm not at all shaming anybody for being into that sort of dynamic. i know it exists as a kink - everything exists as a kink if you make it so. but as much as they deserve to be able to imagine this fictional character as they so please, i too deserve to not get triggered by a character that hits a little too close to home for my liking, portrayed by my favourite actor.

i'm not even sure on whose behalf you lot are even getting mad on, lmao. as far as i've seen on my dash, all my mutuals have been tagging their stuff a lot more, which again, is insanely appreciated bc they don't have to by any means. but i've asked, and they've responded, bc they're good people and we all deserve to be able to curate + share our own internet experiences. the only thing that occasionally goes by is the occasional screenshot/gif of people thirsting over jq's physicality rather than anything to do with his character, and honestly i'll take that as a compromise.

and, since i've said it in a reply and in tags but not yet a full text post - i could be very wrong about what actually happens in that film. i haven't seen it yet. none of us have. but like i said, the clip just brought me back to a time i never want to revisit if i can help it, personally, which is why i'm doing what i can to avoid it. and my community that i've built here are helping me. so if you're going to try and fight me in my ask box over me supposedly trying to "force" everyone to "conform" for "my comfort" - who are you saying this in defence of? who is it that's so offended by my asking? i can't see any evidence of anyone being that way. i've not lost any mutuals since i asked. i promise you, there are far, far better things you could be doing with your time than making up arguments that don't even exist.

[nat-stimmy]

so earlier today, I got some asks pertaining to OCD that I'm not entirely sure how to respond to, but I still want to answer... somehow. I want to keep them in my inbox for a little bit for personal reasons, but it also just didn't feel right to ignore them because I didn't Dislike them or anything, and they hit on some good points about how I talk about my OCD on here that I've been worried about since I started. this will be a long and personal post, so as always with these, block the #personal tag if you don't wish to see these.

I have OCD. I have OCD and am seeing an OCD specialist semi-regularly for treatment and therapy. I have a lot of issues with intrusive thoughts and anxiety that borders on paranoia. I don't make this a particularly well-kept secret, and that is very much on purpose

throughout my life, the only kind of ocd symptoms and traits and representation I saw were the contamination/cleaning/hoarding subtypes. I do not have those (except for maybe hoarding tendencies, but that's uncertain and may not even be true clinically), so I never realized that I was suffering from this disorder.

if I had known sooner, I would have had a much, much better childhood. if I had known about intrusive thoughts, obsessions, and compulsions, I think I may have been able to avoid a depressive episode brought on by self-hatred and fear, not just of the people around me but of my own brain.

to the concerned anon in my inbox earlier: thank you. I sincerely, truly appreciate your warnings and words of support. I understand the risks of talking openly about my intrusive thoughts and I understand that there are many, many bad actors who may use this openness against me.

but I don't want to give OCD power over me anymore. I don't want to have to hide this stuff away and try to ignore it until it all gets overwhelming and I crash. because that's what I've been doing my whole life, and I'm tired of it.

if i could open up about my symptoms and struggles, then not only would that help me not feel like I'm broken or evil or disgusting, but it may help others who are dealing with this too feel seen.

I want to help people avoid the shame and fear that OCD instills in us daily. I want to let people know that their intrusive thoughts are not who they are. I want to help end the stigma around talking about mental illnesses like this that have upsetting sides to them.

I want people to know they're not alone.

so while this blog will not be centered around my struggles with OCD, I'm still likely going to talk about it when/if the topic comes up. because it's part of who I am, a part of me that isn't going away. it influences everything, even how I format gifs in stimboards and what I find stimmy at all!

[spiteless-xo]

hola tiff 👋

i was a frequent commenter on ao3 intending to come back and finish your magnum opus (tbaw) in one sitting bc the week to week format was stressing me out. i somehow spoiled myself on the ending before reading it and i’m lowkey disappointed our girl didn’t ride off into the sunset alone or with her friends, that would’ve been so subversive and unexpected.

a few questions:

- who/what inspired your versions of the aot characters? jean specifically, his personality and values seem completely opposite to his canon counterpart. as for eren, you probably wrote him with way more complexity and emotion than isayama did. if it wasn’t for the borderline revenge porn subplot, i’d say you almost made me love a character i previously hated. your writing is really that great 🤩

- how did you feel about how the mange/anime ended and would you have changed anything about it?

- are you still planning on writing the reiner spin-off?

you definitely earned yourself a break from all this. hope life’s been treating your well otherwise!

hello and welcome back!!! omg what a lovely question, thank you so much for asking!! literally, i saw your message in my inbox and i was like 🥺 and it gave me the energy to respond to a few other messages that i've been hoarding in my inbox for the past like......... month lol

i actually very seriously considered having her end up with nobody or have be it more open-ended but i figured that after all of the pain, the characters deserved a happy ending.

long response under cut

who/what inspired your versions of the aot characters?

jean was inspired by the school castes version of jean where he is a bully lol i've also seen readers describe him as "jean if he never met marco", which is very accurate. in my opinion, even canon jean is not a very good person, in the sense that being "good" or doing the "right thing" doesn't come naturally. we see him struggle through difficult decisions a lot in canon but he always CHOOSES to do the right thing because he doesn't want to disappoint the jean that marco thought he was. since there's nobody to disappoint in tbaw, it's easier for him to be selfish. and you guys all know i love jean, so this isn't even a criticism of his canon character. i LOVE the fact that he's someone who actively works to be a better person because in real life, it's not that easy to always be the hero, so i think that's so cool and realistic and i could probably talk about this all day but I'll stop 🤚 eren i tried to mostly base off of canon, with the exception that his relationship with zeke is flipped. where zeke is desperate for family and eren is the manipulative one in canon, in tbaw it's the opposite. au's are hard, because as much as i want to try to be faithful to canon, when you take away a major part of it (in tbaw's case, the literal TITANS), it can really impact the character. so, now that eren doesn't have his insane desire to kill titans after the death of his mom, in a modern au he has to channel that energy into something else. in tbaw's case it was holding that resentment for his father and trying to find the family that he missed out on, which turned him into this horrible person in hopes of getting validation from the child that his father chose over him. but at the end of the day, he's still super passionate and caring about his friends and is willing to do almost anything for them... but he's honestly just a little stupid and could've definitely talked to his friends about what he was going through instead of going completely nuclear. for the other characters, i tried to stick to what i thought their modern au!personality would be, but i also wanted to tell a certain story so i took some little liberties.

how did you feel about how the mange/anime ended and would you have changed anything about it?

i think it's really difficult to successfully nail the ending of anything. especially something that generates so much discussion, character study, and attention. i feel like we're going to see a similar thing happen with the jjk series. while i don't think the ending to the manga/anime was perfect, i still liked it. i still love attack on titan and rewatch it and engage with the fandom pretty regularly, which is more than i can say about some other shows i liked that have ended. i don't think i'd change anything about the ending if i had the power to do so

are you still planning on writing the reiner spin-off?

yes, hopefully 😭 i haven't been able to write anything for months because i think i'm just overthinking things. but i've been trying really hard these past few days to just get SOMETHING down, so i'm slowly getting back into the swing of things?? maybe?? fingers crossed for me.

[heich0e]

liv do you prefer people leave comments/reviews in reblogs? i usually just send the author something in their inbox so i'm sure they see it but have i been doing it wrong? is it actually annoying this way? 🥲

ok so firstly: i cannot imagine a world in which sharing your feedback/kind thoughts/love for a piece of writing could ever EVER be considered ANNOYING. secondly: i don't for one second believe myself qualified nor capable of speaking for any author other than myself, so I can rly only attest to my own preferences/thoughts on the subject!!

sharing your feedback in ANY way is so SO incredibly appreciated, whether that be in the tags of a reblog or otherwise. this might sound silly but as a writer i'm always incredibly grateful (/relieved??) whenever anyone feels compelled to let me know they read what i wrote and liked it. just that simple acknowledgement that like, hey, that thing i created has made its way to another human being is tremendously reassuring. someone saw it. someone read it. someone liked it. i knew it and it was mine and now it's ours because they know it too.

that being said! when i get asks with comments/responses to a fic i always ALWAYS struggle with responding. i worry that whatever i manage to reply pales in comparison to how kind the initial ask was, and rarely (if ever) properly conveys how deeply appreciative i am to have received the message. i worry that i'm not doing justice to the sincere gratitude i feel. because of that i often end up just hoarding these asks until i "feel like I can reply right"—which, if i'm being entirely honest, means i probably just end up keeping it in my inbox forever and feel worse because i never replied at all.

to me (perhaps rather selfishly) the benefit to comments left in the tags of a reblog is that the pressure i feel in forming a response is gone, and i can also easily refer back to them in the future by going back to the notes of the original post. some people also don't reblog posts at all (let alone with tags) which is of course another issue entirely, but that's definitely been talked about enough that it doesn't need me bringing it up again. there's something very sweet to me about someone reblogging something i wrote with their thoughts in the tags for the great wide world to see... like a goodreads review or something. idk if this even makes sense lmaooo

but that being said, none of those "benefits" outweigh the worth of receiving feedback (in any form) and i would never want someone to think or feel that an ask with their comments wasn't welcome because it 10000% is. always. ALWAYS. i also recognize that some people are just more comfortable interacting anonymously, and I don't deny anyone that right!! being perceived is scary sometimes!! but the fact of the matter is that interaction (in all forms! asks/tags/reblogs/even likes in some cases) seems to be down, but strangely i seem to be gaining just as many followers as usual, which can rly only logically lead me to the assumption that YES people are reading it, they just aren't acknowledging it. which feels.... idk. devastating feels dramatic, but it also feels right.

anyway, sorry this got long. just my two cents! (if u adjust for inflation it's 200000000000 cents.) love you! drink some water!

[unhitches-similes]

20 Questions for Fanfic Writers

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

13 (current penname)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

122,174 (current penname)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Under my current penname: Marvel/MCU, Stargate SG-1 & Atlantis, and Miraculous Ladybug--but I have ideas for fics in other fandoms!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Eidetic Image (T) Marvel

The Stand-In (G) Marvel - Stony

How to Avoid Thinking (E) Marvel - IronHawk

You Wanna Go (on a Date with Me)?! (T) Marvel - Stony

Change is All (T) - SG-1

5. Do you respond to comments? Why? Why not?

Yes, absolutely. That said, it can occasionally take me months to do so, especially on my older works, because I leave them in my inbox and hoard them like a dragon because they make me so happy.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I really should write more angst, tbh... that said, the only fic I currently have that can really be called angsty and ends without a happy ending is Worse Than Myth.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I would say Eidetic Image has a happy ending, if you don't count the teaser/cliffhanger that is the epilogue. Otherwise probably Change is All?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've been writing fanfiction in some form for 20+ years and posting for nearly as long, so I've definitely gotten a few hate comments over the years, but nothing on any of my recent stuff. In part because I'm not that known, probably.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, and it really depends on the muse.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I don't really write any crazy crossovers, although technically, most of my Marvel fics are a fusion of various Marvel sources (MCU, 616, etc.) and I've also got a crossover between SG-1 and Atlantis, but they're really the same fandom families and don't really count as real crossovers, imo.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge and it's my hope that I never do.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I had several translated under my previous penname, but none of my recent stuff; I've divorced myself from the fandom in question.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Under a previous penname, yes.

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Asking a shipper's favorite ship is cruel and unusual, but it's probably almost definitely IronHawk or Stuckony. Also Spirk. I also really love the Lovesquare in all its permutations.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I don't have an WIPs currently being posted for this very reason. So many ideas. With my motivation and butterfly brain, I'll never finish them all.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm pretty great with dialogue and emotive scenes, I think? I'm not sure--please let me know!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Not actually writing even though I really want to. I also struggle with action scenes, but everyone says they always come out fine, so I'm not sure.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Oh. Oh, this is a bad question to ask me.

Listen, if the readers are supposed to understand what's being said, then freaking write it in the same language as the rest of fic and italicize to indicate it's in a different language. If I have to go hunting for a goddamn translation, or scroll back and forth to the mf-ing notes, when I'm supposed to know what's being said, odds are very high that I'm going to simply stop reading a fic. It's bad writing. Yes, I said it. It's bad writing--it's your job as a writer to make sure a reader can understand what they need to without making them jump through hoops. If your "aesthetic" matters more to you than making your narrative readily accessible to your readers, you need to rethink having another language being spoken. That said, if readers aren't supposed to understand what is said (or it's obvious/doesn't matter in the case of, like, spells or something), or you work the translation into the story right away, I'm all for it. Those are the only times I find it acceptable to actually have another language that's spoken written in a language different from the rest of the narrative.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Cats (the 1998 video, not that 2019 monstrosity)

20. Favorite fics you’ve written?

I'm really rather proud of Eidetic Image despite its numerous and varied flaws, as well as The Seeds of Great Enterprises. I also really had a lot of fun writing my Miraculous BFF-swap story Crushes and Antics.

Thank you so much for tagging me, @hamsteriffic! <3 I think I shall give a poke to... ahhhhh--anyone who sees this and might wanna do it as well! I lack the temerity to ask anyone apart from Hamster or Waffle lol

[crownedhopelesss]

A PSA:

i am a HOARDER for memes, okay? i love each and every single one i receive from all of you lovely human beings and i do have every intention of answering every single one i have in my inbox. if i haven’t yet, it does not mean i don’t want to or don’t care about it or whatever. i WILL answer them so don’t feel deterred from sending more bc then i’m like 😍😍 i jus naturally prioritize threads, especially plotted ones, over memes bc i don’t have A LOT of time or energy to be on here so when i do, i try to do threads first then memes when i have the chance.

i love ALLLL of them okay?! not that anyone has said anything to me about my issue w hoarding, i just felt like i had to put this out here. side note: if you send/sent in a meme and you’re dying for a response, you are MORE THAN WELCOME to poke me in the dms and be like “please sir answer my meme 🥺” and i will be more than happy to do so 🖤 i will never be upset or offended by it (unless you’re rude of course but i doubt any of y’all would be at all).

tldr; i love memes, i suck at responding to them at a fast pace but don’t stop sending them and you can poke me to respond to yours quickly 🖤

[wakkossnackstash]

Do you do requests?

I hope this makes sense; I do take prompts and suggestions in my asks, but I don't respond to all of them/draw all of them, however; I DO hoard them in my inbox in case I'm ever inspired in the future! So you never know! lol

[pidgefudge]

For your anonymous what I think of you:

You have. Such a Specific Vibe. It's like if a crow was given access to a computer and had Very Good Opinions. Your blog is such an ecclectic collection of things, from cat videos to trans things to disabled things to activism things. It's so random and I love seeing a shit ton of cat videos and going 'ah, Pidge went on a cat video deep dive.' It makes me so happy. Some of your posts want Too Much Brainpower for me so I don't reblog them because I have Very Limited Brainpower but they are good posts nontheless.

Anyway, you are a very cool crow who has been given access to a computer and has Very Good Opinions. You have a wonderful hoard of Good Posts to share.

May the gods of shiny things send your Crow Brain many shiny things in the future.

woagh phd dissertation on silly lil pidge :0

for starters i had this sitting in my inbox all day and read it like 20 times hehe :33 and then forgot to respond until now oopsies

i am always incredibly based and correct of course!!!! and as u have observed i reblog everything under the sun (and i figured u could tell whether im deep diving in a tag or just scrolling my dash based on my reblogs so thanks for confirming lmao)

crow AND pigeon i am never beating the bird allegations i suppose (but i do love me some shinies)

[samspenandsword]

You are truly the kindest person on here. Interaction with a lot of people in the fandom is hard. They have their own friends, they only want to talk to more important writers, interaction with them has to be transactional, etc. But I have treasured every interaction with you. You have always been kind, open and caring. Your big heart makes such a difference in making this community feel like a warm and welcoming place. I hope you always find the love you give reflected back to you because you deserve it 💕

Anon...

Okay, I am literally tearing up. This is just so... And you call me the kind one?? Anon!!!

I know what you mean about how interaction on this site can feel transactional sometimes between writers and artists within fandom. And not in the way of ye old fandom days ("If I get 5 comments I'll post the next chapter!") but in a way to accumulate clout and followers as quickly as possible. I definitely have noticed patterns like that on here, so I know what you mean. So for you to tell me this, it really just means the absolute world to me. I genuinely will cherish this message forever, so much so I was tempted to just... never respond and keep this in my inbox indefinitely to hoard when I needed it. But you deserve a response, and to know that you telling me this shows just how big of a heart you have as well. Not many people go out of their way to send messages like these, and I think its telling of how caring you are too.

I hope you find the love you've given me reflected back at you as well. Because you say I deserve it, but so do you. Thank you, anon, for this. I truly, truly can't express how warm my heart is right now. ❤️❤️❤️

reblog this if you want a LONG (or short) anonymous message saying what they think of you.

[unforestalledreturn]

//Well fuck you too anon. I--  Thank you. You may be wondering why I screen capped this rather than responded to it-- And this is because I hoard these precious treasures in my inbox so they are never lost and I am frequently reminded of such wonderful kindness.  Now excuse me while I bawl my eyes out because I really, really have tried to create Genesis to be an enjoyable character to a broader audience. I very much want to push the potential he had in Crisis Core and fully realize him. I am thrilled you enjoy seeing the threads on your dash! aND IF WE ARE NOT THREADING RN uMMM -thrusts leggy @ u- UGh, and yeah fuck you and all that I’m a tough lady and how FUCKING DARE

[squuote]

OHHHHHHSBSJSKSKSKSKS OH MY GOD

sorry hold on

I JUST recently saw your response to my ask + your Mariella art and have Combusted. I was worried tumblr ate it, in which case it was gone forever because I wrote it directly in the ask box on mobile (terrible habit of mine, really), and I was So Sad to think it was gone. BUT!!! IT DID GO THROUGH! YOU JUST HAD TO ROTATE A WHILE.... OH I'M SO HAPPY.... AND OUGH AUGH OOF... THE ART... THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS GETTING AT PUT INTO SUCH GLORIOUS VISUAL FORM...!!! To have inspired you even just a crumb to make something so beautiful!! I am so happy!!! I am so grateful!!! I have never been so pleased to let the autism run free and I am SO glad that you enjoyed my Mariella screed. I love you. Have a WONDERFUL day.

OH MY GOD HIHIHI YOUR MARIELLA ASK LITERALLY REARRANGED MY ENTIRE THOUGHTS ON HER FR IM SO GLAD YOU SENT IT AND THAT YOU SAW THE ART I regret not linking the ask on the art post originally I should have done that because it literally was so fucking good *_* IM RLLY GLAD I CAPTURED THE VIBE YOU WERE GOING FOR im only sorry that it took me forever to respond, I rlly was just hoarding it for the first few days because I was like ohhh I gotta take my time to digest and process this. And then I had the idea for the art so I am partly glad I waited because I rlly adore how that one turned out and now especially so since it got the vibe exactly like YEAAGHH THATS SO AWESOME….

literally love you too anon please feel free to like share anything you want in my inbox ever that ask was so awesome !!!!!!!

[charmsandtealeaves]

Assumptions ask: you do your absolute best with coming up with a story. In which you worked on for hours maybe even months, when inspiration would strike. After all that hard work you second guess your work, but you remember the people that enjoy your writing. Which makes you realize that maybe just maybe your being too hard on yourself, and that you don’t realize how great of a writer that you are. Even if your friends compliment you, you still are a bit nervous about your writing. But…. But you are getting better with uploading your fics as you try to stay positive

(Keep on writing! Never give up, you are very talented 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺)

I accused Athena of sending this ask as we literally just had this conversation, which she vehemently denied. So I don’t know who this is or how you knew I needed it.

For a variety of reasons today is not a good day for me. But this ask might just be the silver lining. I kinda wanted to hoard it in my inbox so I can keep staring at it. Though I think it’s important to respond and you get the chance to see how much it meant to me... I’ve screen shot it and it’s now saved in my phone.

So thank you anon. Thank you so much.

[grimm-bot]

to the people who sent these asks and i never responded: im sorry . i didnt expect such nice things in my inbox so now im hoarding them like a little gremlin so i dont ever forget that they were sent