#how are you feeling with all thats going on in thr world

[bellamyblakru]

What do u think u were put on this earth to do

GRETA WUESTION. what do i think i was put on this earth to do… hm right away i thought to make people laugh because thats my absolute favorite feeling in thr world. but another thought was to make people feel important. to feel seen and appreciated and loved and valued. there is a beauty in making people see how important they are to their world. and that no matter how small you may seem, you have made a difference in at least one life—and thats enough, you know? lifes short and sad and filled with shit beyond human understanding. like the lack of decent human decency in the world is astounding. like just fucking exist to make other lives better for themselves yeah? why else were we put on here for? to be selfish? cruel? to belittle??? disgusting. we can the capability to be such thoughtful lovely beings and we shoukd do that everywhere we go. a smile. a laugh. a helping hand. it seems silly when u say it but like. we are all put on this earth to leave it better than how we were forced to see it. and even with my social anxiety and depression abd fesr of never being good enough at anything i do, i always ALWAYS want to make those around me feel loved.

because at the end of thr day, nothing is better than being loved, yknow?

[babeczka415]

Best For You

A/N: this oneshot is inspired by the song "I'm Not Mad" by Hasley. Definitely a totally different view, sorry for fhe heartbreak

It was just another day for the gang at the Black lake, the sun was out and the spring temperatures were definetally showing up. We had decided to just have a fun day with all of them and I couldn’t have been happier. You see it’s been three years since this gang entered her life, a year since meeting Sam. Sam had come to visit Duskwood for one of the festivals and they had bumped into eachother at a game and instantly hit it off. He was smart, funny, and handsome with his brown hair and green eyes.  He had a good job that allowed him to work remotely so it was no surprise to anyone once they realized how serious things were getting that he moved to Duskwood.

Watching Sam with Hannah and Thomas little boy on the swing just melted my heart and I couldn’t wait to try and make a future with him, if he wanted. I’m so focused on the sight in front of me I don’t realize someone set and sat down next to me until I feel a hand on my arm.

“Hey, I want to check in with you. I heard from him,” Lilly’s voice is what makes me realize who’s she’s talking about.

“I’m not mad anymore, Lilly. He made the choice like he did with Hannah to push me away. I wish him the best, but….” I’m stopped mid sentence as I see someone walking up to Hannah and hugging her.  I instantly know who it is, by the black hair and his height. I turn my head, not wanting to face him. “I’m gonna go over to Sam and Andrew.’ i say wanting to see the little boy in the swing before I break down.

—---------

Flashback

Standing on my balcony waiting for him I felt the world was standing still. Seconds felt like hours as I waited for the hooded figure at the bottom of the fire escape. How I managed too see him I have no idea but I did. I couldn't wait to see his face and as she climbed up my breathing hitched. 

After the mine it wasn't safe in Duskwood but he asked to track my location so he could find me. Here we are, he's only a few floors below now, as I watch him climb.

As he reaches mine he jumps over the railing and I put my hands on his face. I feel that scruff and those sharp features, unsure if I'm ready to reveal who is under this hood. Before I had a chance to think he crashed his lips into mine and I lost focus.

That night is still a blur but I remember stealing his shirt in the morning and begging him to stay. We had spent the night cuddling in my bed watching whatever we could find on the tv.

After that night he pushed me away, he told me I deserved better. I deserve to live in the sunlight. My heart was broken, I was madly in love but he didn't feel the same.

—---------

As I’m walking toward the man that holds my heart now, I feel someone grab my arm. I try to focus on Sam so I didn’t hear anyone calling me. I stop, afraid to look at the hand on arm. 

“MC,” Jake’s voice is what brings me back.

“Hi,” i say with a small smile. As I turn to look at him, looking in his blue eyes I don’t feel the same thing I use too and I sigh as I have really moved on.

“I just wanted to say I’m sorry”, he lets go of my arm and lets out a sigh. I know thats not what he really wanted to say but he must of learned I have moved on.

“I’m not even mad anymore, Jake. Honestly I still wish uou the best.” I go to turn but he stops me by getting in front of me.

“I miss what we had,....” His looks into my hazel eyes and it doesn’t break my heart.

“ I ain't even mad anymore. I don't even want you back anymore. I don't remember what we had anymore. I hope you think about me sleeping in your t-shirt. I hope your little brother turns out to be nothing like you. I hope that you hurt more than I did and honestly I still wish you nothing but the best but I know that you're still self-obsessed. I hear the wicked get no rest but when you do I hope you'll dream of me.”

“Please let me explain,”  the pleaded in his voice and wanting to get back to what we had three years ago.

“I don't even hope you die these days, like I did when you first broke my heart. I hope you live 'til eighty-five these days regretting that you'd ever lie those days. I hope it's eating you alive these days.I hope you're in the bathroom just wishing I’m gonna change my mind and come back soon. I hope that when you're thirty-five years you wish that you tried to 'cause I know that I'd did.” I walk away from him.

I know he’s watching me but I can’t go back. Jake doesn’t hold my heart anymore and today that has been made perfectly clear. I know I want to see where things go with Sam and the past is behind me now. I definitely needed to get that off my chest with Jake but that doesn’t make it any easier.

As I walk up to Sam he instantly knows something is up and pulls me in for a hug. I hear him whisper "everything is going to be okay" into my ear and for the first time I feel that way.

I pull away and smile, "I know it will be. I have you now in my life." I still feel the desire to tell him who I was talking too and Jessy must notice as she takes over for the  little one. 

Walking towards the water along the small path, our hands are interlocked with each other. Everything with him feels right but he has the right to know I still do care about Jake.

'MC, who were you talking too before you came uo to me?" His voice laced with concerned, afraid he will lose me.

I let out a massive sigh and look into his eyes, the same green eyes I have fallen in love with slowly. "Jake, Hannah and Lilly's half brother. He's also a man I use to love." I look away at that statement.

Feeling his hand move to my chin to turn me back to him. "Do you still?" I know why he's asking, he wants to know if this is over.

"I don't love him anymore, but I do still care about him. He was a big part of me finding this gang, which also led me to finding you." I shyly smile at him.

"So he's going to be alart of our lives?" This though never crossed my mind until he asked.

Turn and looking out over the water, unsure how to answer. I hear Dan yelling for us from where everyone is. "Most likely will be," i gently say not wanting to make this weird.

He turns me around and kisses me and I smile, "he will learn I don't give up what I love." His smile is back to what I adore abd I see the glimmer of love in his green eyes. 

The smile is back on my face, " don't worry he don't stand a chance again," lacing my fingers with his as we walk back.

The rest of the day is relaxed and fun. I notice Jake watching us but smiling at how happy I am with Sam. I notice he's watching me like he does Hannah and Lilly which makes me even happier that he still cares about me. At first there was a bit of tension between him and Sam but eventually it broke somehow over something Dan said.

As I'm helping Hannah load up the car I look out and see all the guys talking and it brings a smile to my face.

"I'm glad you two still care about each other," Hannah states as she puts a gentle hand on my shoulder.

"I was worried him and Sam wouldn't get along because of the history. Those boys just seem to prove me wrong all the time." I laugh because it's the truth.

"Just know even though you and him didn't end how we all thought, your still part of the family." She pulls me into a hug and I embrace it back.

Because its the truth, this whole gang is one big family through all the craziness we have gone through.

[recursive360]

Auguries of Innocence

BY WILLIAM BLAKE

To see a World in a Grain of Sand

And a Heaven in a Wild Flower 

Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand 

And Eternity in an hour

A Robin Red breast in a Cage

Puts all Heaven in a Rage 

A Dove house filld with Doves & Pigeons

Shudders Hell thr' all its regions 

A dog starvd at his Masters Gate

Predicts the ruin of the State 

A Horse misusd upon the Road

Calls to Heaven for Human blood 

Each outcry of the hunted Hare

A fibre from the Brain does tear 

A Skylark wounded in the wing 

A Cherubim does cease to sing 

The Game Cock clipd & armd for fight

Does the Rising Sun affright 

Every Wolfs & Lions howl

Raises from Hell a Human Soul 

The wild deer, wandring here & there 

Keeps the Human Soul from Care 

The Lamb misusd breeds Public Strife

And yet forgives the Butchers knife 

The Bat that flits at close of Eve

Has left the Brain that wont Believe

The Owl that calls upon the Night

Speaks the Unbelievers fright

He who shall hurt the little Wren

Shall never be belovd by Men 

He who the Ox to wrath has movd

Shall never be by Woman lovd

The wanton Boy that kills the Fly

Shall feel the Spiders enmity 

He who torments the Chafers Sprite

Weaves a Bower in endless Night 

The Catterpiller on the Leaf

Repeats to thee thy Mothers grief 

Kill not the Moth nor Butterfly 

For the Last Judgment draweth nigh 

He who shall train the Horse to War

Shall never pass the Polar Bar 

The Beggars Dog & Widows Cat 

Feed them & thou wilt grow fat 

The Gnat that sings his Summers Song

Poison gets from Slanders tongue 

The poison of the Snake & Newt

Is the sweat of Envys Foot 

The poison of the Honey Bee

Is the Artists Jealousy

The Princes Robes & Beggars Rags

Are Toadstools on the Misers Bags 

A Truth thats told with bad intent

Beats all the Lies you can invent 

It is right it should be so 

Man was made for Joy & Woe 

And when this we rightly know 

Thro the World we safely go 

Joy & Woe are woven fine 

A Clothing for the soul divine 

Under every grief & pine

Runs a joy with silken twine 

The Babe is more than swadling Bands

Throughout all these Human Lands

Tools were made & Born were hands 

Every Farmer Understands

Every Tear from Every Eye

Becomes a Babe in Eternity 

This is caught by Females bright

And returnd to its own delight 

The Bleat the Bark Bellow & Roar 

Are Waves that Beat on Heavens Shore 

The Babe that weeps the Rod beneath

Writes Revenge in realms of Death 

The Beggars Rags fluttering in Air

Does to Rags the Heavens tear 

The Soldier armd with Sword & Gun 

Palsied strikes the Summers Sun

The poor Mans Farthing is worth more

Than all the Gold on Africs Shore

One Mite wrung from the Labrers hands

Shall buy & sell the Misers Lands 

Or if protected from on high 

Does that whole Nation sell & buy 

He who mocks the Infants Faith

Shall be mockd in Age & Death 

He who shall teach the Child to Doubt

The rotting Grave shall neer get out 

He who respects the Infants faith

Triumphs over Hell & Death 

The Childs Toys & the Old Mans Reasons

Are the Fruits of the Two seasons 

The Questioner who sits so sly 

Shall never know how to Reply 

He who replies to words of Doubt

Doth put the Light of Knowledge out 

The Strongest Poison ever known

Came from Caesars Laurel Crown 

Nought can Deform the Human Race

Like to the Armours iron brace 

When Gold & Gems adorn the Plow

To peaceful Arts shall Envy Bow 

A Riddle or the Crickets Cry

Is to Doubt a fit Reply 

The Emmets Inch & Eagles Mile

Make Lame Philosophy to smile 

He who Doubts from what he sees

Will neer Believe do what you Please 

If the Sun & Moon should Doubt 

Theyd immediately Go out 

To be in a Passion you Good may Do 

But no Good if a Passion is in you 

The Whore & Gambler by the State

Licencd build that Nations Fate 

The Harlots cry from Street to Street 

Shall weave Old Englands winding Sheet 

The Winners Shout the Losers Curse 

Dance before dead Englands Hearse 

Every Night & every Morn

Some to Misery are Born 

Every Morn and every Night

Some are Born to sweet delight 

Some are Born to sweet delight 

Some are Born to Endless Night 

We are led to Believe a Lie

When we see not Thro the Eye

Which was Born in a Night to perish in a Night 

When the Soul Slept in Beams of Light 

God Appears & God is Light

To those poor Souls who dwell in Night 

But does a Human Form Display

To those who Dwell in Realms of day

----------

Source: Poets of the English Language (Viking Press, 1950)

[aqours]

and the sad thing is i think. vol 9 had a chance to actually discuss death. i'm going to be extremely nice to RWBY and ignore my dislike for Jaune and how WBY has become and i will even ignore how awful everything and stupid around Penny's death is. i am going to be extraordinarily generous amd pretend that Penny's second death was written good and we should feel bad for Jaune for it

death is terrifying. Ruby and Jaune both have been completely traumatized and had years of their lives shaped by Pyrha's and Penny's deaths. Ruby got Penny back and now shes gone again. Jaune had to kill a friend. so they find a world where death is... not final.

i am going to say that yes, i view what thr Ever Afterians do is suicide. they commit suicide. they Paper Pleasers commited suicide. i dont think thats. inherently bad. thats how their world works, you fulfill a purpose, you die... you come back. its a fantasy world with a fantasy system about how death works, and the people of that world embrace it. they do not have thr philosophy of death that we of the real world or team RWBY have. death is not an end to them, and they dont have qualms about utilizing it for themselves when they wish to be reborn. its ok for them to have an alien attitude about death!

one thing i REALLY liked was when they were talking about the Paper Pleasers. team RWBY found it weird, but they accepted this world worked differently. Jaune was in the wrong because hes a teaumatized man with an understanding that to him, to Remnant, death is... final. he was trying to cope with his own trauma by forcing this outlook on a group people who would find OUR understanding and attitude about death and its finality as alien as we are to them.

and theres an appeal to it. its an appeal i could see both Ruby and Jaune, neither of whom are bastions of mental health thinking constantly about.

"Could I have a chance to be better, to do everything over?"

theyre tired. being depressed is tiring. anyone who has been depressed... knows that. its like being ao unendingly tired you dont ever remember what its like to not be tired. and when depression is so bad you think about ending it: from firsthand experience, i get the appeal of Ascension. the idea of waking up and i can be someone new, someone who isnt tired. i think that would appeal to Ruby and Jaune.

i think this should have been the entire theme of v9.

i think v9 should have been about death. it should have been about Ruby and Jaune's trauma regarding the deaths of those whonthey care about, about Atlas, everything reaching rock bottom. both of them barely coping and in a world where death... is different. but not for them.

Ruby should have held the teacup. she should have been contemplating suicide but ultimately didnt, because of things she came to a conclusion about death in this volume. Ruby Rose should have contemplated suicide in this world where death is different but not do so because she grew. they SAID the theme of this volume is "you are enough" but nothing happens to show it. she should not have attempted suicide like this: she should have contemplated it and decided not to do it with what she had learned and come ti understand.

RWBY Volume 9 should have been about Ruby and Jaune finally, TRULY coming to terms with the death of their precious friends and finally being able to fully move forward. This should have been one of the most emotionaply intense and heavy seasons. It should have been about death, its inevitibility, its finality, and above all making peace with it and the strength to persevere even when yearning for the end in the hopes of something better.

"You are enough."

[cloudninetonine]

Reuniting with the ACTUAL og chain is gonna be so traumatic for Player. Like she's been running from versions of them that have actively killed for Player and tried to kill Player. There was likely a lot of emotional manipulation with the yans and the villain chain likely isolated Player up in that castle for a fucking age. Not only that but their morals are all skewed because they've been assisted by Ganons, who are good in two worlds and horrifically bad in the original. Player probs has some pretty extreme trust and paranoia issues coz the fact they come from a different universe where the Links were nice and good would have been used to their counterparts to lure Player back to them if they ever found out.

They wouldn't be able to tell if the real chain is the real chain because their paranoia is constantly poking at them that they'll be taken back to that castle again at any moment. Player wouldn't sleep thinking they'd get kidnapped, wouldn't eat thinking their food was poisoned, and would be on a very obvious high alert, so much so that they wouldn't want any of the boys to touch them even for help with tasks or fighting, healing an injury, or even just on accident, much to Wild and Hyrule's dismay. They're constantly in survival mode and has probably pulled a blade on one of them before.

And the Chain would be super concerned because Player used to be so bubbly when they found their spark and would be very openly affectionate to the people that allowed it. Probably worsening it is the fact they just suddenly left for months.

Imagine if Legend starts to become actively upset and it worsens his hatred for the Player coz he's had to witness how his brothers have begun to crumble under the worry and pressure of losing their guide for the god knows how many'th time. But Player learned to take this as disguised worry and their anxieties reject the notion that this is their chain because Legend shouldn't like them. But in reality, he despises them for leaving so suddenly and for no reason and letting his family fall because of it, not knowing the actual story behind Player being sent to a different world because they're so tight-lipped from their lack of trust. But it's just a horrible cycle that makes their distrust in each other worse and worse and worse. Lots of damaged relationships and mediation and compromise before Player either finally gives up or they decide that they don't want to live like this and learn to accept their situation and thr horridness of the nagging feeling in their brain that doesn't ever go away.

Doesn't matter either way because the men whose faces they'd come to love and cherish had suddenly become a sight of terrors from being so heavily traumatized. The road to recovery is paved with first learning to kick back off of survival mode, but thats pretty hard to know when there's very few of the chain who were ever able to. So many troubled for our poor Player.

Russ you're completely right.

It will be shown later in the au of course but despite how Player is relaxed now they're still not well mentally and seeing even a glimpse of one of the boys is gonna send them tumbling.

Trust me, once I settled all the Dadons I will try my hand at the angst train.

Also, Russ, this analysis is beautiful, thank you.

[deadeyes-o0]

Auguries of Innocence

By William Blake

To see a World in a Grain of Sand

And a Heaven in a Wild Flower

Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand

And Eternity in an hour

A Robin Red breast in a Cage

Puts all Heaven in a Rage

A Dove house filld with Doves & Pigeons

Shudders Hell thr’ all its regions

A dog starvd at his Masters Gate

Predicts the ruin of the State

A Horse misusd upon the Road

Calls to Heaven for Human blood

Each outcry of the hunted Hare

A fibre from the Brain does tear

A Skylark wounded in the wing

A Cherubim does cease to sing

The Game Cock clipd & armd for fight

Does the Rising Sun affright

Every Wolfs & Lions howl

Raises from Hell a Human Soul

The wild deer, wandring here & there

Keeps the Human Soul from Care

The Lamb misusd breeds Public Strife

And yet forgives the Butchers knife

The Bat that flits at close of Eve

Has left the Brain that wont Believe

The Owl that calls upon the Night

Speaks the Unbelievers fright

He who shall hurt the little Wren

Shall never be belovd by Men

He who the Ox to wrath has movd

Shall never be by Woman lovd

The wanton Boy that kills the Fly

Shall feel the Spiders enmity

He who torments the Chafers Sprite

Weaves a Bower in endless Night

The Catterpiller on the Leaf

Repeats to thee thy Mothers grief

Kill not the Moth nor Butterfly

For the Last Judgment draweth nigh

He who shall train the Horse to War

Shall never pass the Polar Bar

The Beggars Dog & Widows Cat

Feed them & thou wilt grow fat

The Gnat that sings his Summers Song

Poison gets from Slanders tongue

The poison of the Snake & Newt

Is the sweat of Envys Foot

The poison of the Honey Bee

Is the Artists Jealousy

The Princes Robes & Beggars Rags

Are Toadstools on the Misers Bags

A Truth thats told with bad intent

Beats all the Lies you can invent

It is right it should be so

Man was made for Joy & Woe

And when this we rightly know

Thro the World we safely go

Joy & Woe are woven fine

A Clothing for the soul divine

Under every grief & pine

Runs a joy with silken twine

The Babe is more than swadling Bands

Throughout all these Human Lands

Tools were made & Born were hands

Every Farmer Understands

Every Tear from Every Eye

Becomes a Babe in Eternity

This is caught by Females bright

And returnd to its own delight

The Bleat the Bark Bellow & Roar

Are Waves that Beat on Heavens Shore

The Babe that weeps the Rod beneath

Writes Revenge in realms of Death

The Beggars Rags fluttering in Air

Does to Rags the Heavens tear

The Soldier armd with Sword & Gun

Palsied strikes the Summers Sun

The poor Mans Farthing is worth more

Than all the Gold on Africas Shore

One Mite wrung from the Labrers hands

Shall buy & sell the Misers Lands

Or if protected from on high

Does that whole Nation sell & buy

He who mocks the Infants Faith

Shall be mockd in Age & Death

He who shall teach the Child to Doubt

The rotting Grave shall ne'er get out

He who respects the Infants faith

Triumphs over Hell & Death

The Childs Toys & the Old Mans Reasons

Are the Fruits of the Two seasons

The Questioner who sits so sly

Shall never know how to Reply

He who replies to words of Doubt

Doth put the Light of Knowledge out

The Strongest Poison ever known

Came from Caesars Laurel Crown

Nought can Deform the Human Race

Like to the Armours iron brace

When Gold & Gems adorn the Plow

To peaceful Arts shall Envy Bow

A Riddle or the Crickets Cry

Is to Doubt a fit Reply

The Emmets Inch & Eagles Mile

Make Lame Philosophy to smile

He who Doubts from what he sees

Will ne'er Believe do what you Please

If the Sun & Moon should Doubt

Theyd immediately Go out

To be in a Passion you Good may Do

But no Good if a Passion is in you

The Whore & Gambler by the State

Licencd build that Nations Fate

The Harlots cry from Street to Street

Shall weave Old Englands winding Sheet

The Winners Shout the Losers Curse

Dance before dead Englands Hearse

Every Night & every Morn

Some to Misery are Born

Every Morn and every Night

Some are Born to sweet delight

Some are Born to sweet delight

Some are Born to Endless Night

We are led to Believe a Lie

When we see not Thro the Eye

Which was Born in a Night to perish in a Night

When the Soul Slept in Beams of Light

God Appears & God is Light

To those poor Souls who dwell in Night

But does a Human Form Display

To those who Dwell in Realms of day

Vision of the Last Judgement

By William Blake

[battleangel]

Life Is a Dark Ballet

Reject societal conditioning

Kill your own ego thats an ego death

Ascend and awaken to the spiritual limitless energetic being you are

Open your third eye & see this virtual reality as the video game simulation it is

🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿

Bills rent mortgage jobs work 9 to 5s emails Slack Teams meetings agendas promotions performance reviews succession planning unpaid overtime salaried benefits 401k "job security" executive golden handcuffs misery drudgery HR new hire orientation employee slave working to live working to die

Corporate induced death corporate zombie slave to the machine chained to your desk work from home work from anywhere but your own mind instead of asking how much time is left ask how much of your own mind cause in this life things are much harder than the afterlife in this life youre own your own and when the elevator tries to bring you down go crazy

Shut off closed off shut down work through lunch never get up from your desk i dont have time to go to the bathroom no time to think

No worries ill get that done for you right away i need this done like yesterday please advise reply all cc bcc blind copy do you copy she dropped dead at her desk yesterday and they filled her role thr next day working on the corporate amerikkka plantation modern day slavery everybodys working for the weekend we didnt start the fire subliminal suicides corporate deicides

CEO as god as the father as your priest as the principal as the ultimate male authority figure and symbol

Brazzers gonzo girls gone wild thats gross i liked it onlyfans im your only fan how much for anal degradation desecration dessication problematize the sacred kill your parents god is a woman god is dead radiohead hail to the thief all hail the king i used to rule the world i hear terrorists and the bells are ringing for some reason i cant explain i know st peter will call my name

Northrop grumman and raytheon stock is way up just a couple of dead babies in israel and raped grandmas in palestine stocks are up war is good

War is slavery strength is peace oceania big brother aldous huxley brave new world brave new girl i live for the applause pornify my pussy shake yo dreads sexyy red usher will be performing at the superbowl halftime show man as machine man in the machine ghost in the shell im talking to the man in the mirror stranger in moscow kgb was stalking me how does it feel when youre alone and its cold inside

Marcus garvey murdered prophets my angel warned me that i would be the black sheep in my family more than my brother memorial day 2021 and i told my father on my parents deck my angel warned me that i would stand alone life is a mystery everyone must stand alone i hear you call my name and it feels like home

Its a beautiful life but im not concerned its a beautiful dream but a dream is earned people tell me to shut my mouth that i must conform i will not renounce the things that i have said i was meant to fight the english i am not afraid to die dont you know to doubt him is a sin i wont give in you can cut my hair and say that im a witch and burn me at the stake its all a big mistake...

[skoulsons]

TLOU ep6 | I did not fix these up at all, so have fun reading any and all misspellings and parts where it looks like my brain is melting (it was)

FIDHEOFHSKDVim so excited

he’s so pretty

“What did I just say?” grumpy lil dad with his disobeying daughter

Joel’s having ptsd :( cant wait to get more of this throughout the episode :) not.

he really thinks he lost the last of his blood

this feels very reminiscent of when he gets injured. Later this episode??

(Light guitar playing) my love <3

“Don’t start” 😭

THE RABBIT CONVERSATJON. they rlly are bonding

the tape over his foot :( just like Tess

COME DOWN FEOM THERE YOURE GONNA BRRAK TOUR NECK

YEAHHHH HES GIVING HER SOME. HES GOT A LIL SMILEEEE

“Okay?” 😭

OH ITS WE ?? :((

an old farmhouse some land :(( just like tlou2

SHEEP THEURE QUIET DO WHAT THEYRE TOLD. sooo tlou2 coded

them acting like they’re going their separate ways 🤣🤣🤣

ASTRONAUT. he could just tell :(

I love this little campfire with them

ILL DO BOTH WATCHES GET SOME SLEEP DREAM OF SHEEP RANCHES ON THE MOON

IS HE SAYINF ITS SHPPOSED TO BE ME OH MY FUCODHENDHDJEDH

IM RESPONSIBLE FOR YOU OKAY

LIKE YOU TAUGHT ME TO

aw it’s like the same when he took the beretta from her in ep4 THE SHOT IS SO SIMILAR WITH HIS HAND OUT BUT ITS NOT AS ANGRY THIS TIME

the glances :(

wake me up next time <3

NOT HER TRYING TO WISTLE 😭😭

TALENTTTT

they’re just so so tiny.

and to know she has to hunt to keep him alive next episode

THEYRE DOIJF THR HYDROELECTRIC PLANT??? WAIT???

“Don’t ask me I don’t have a clue” YOU COULDBE MADE SOMETHING UP I WOULDBE BELIEVED YOU

THERE THEY AREEEEEE

him grabbing her wrist <333333333

YOULL BE OKAY MY GOGHDJDGD I LOVE REASSURANCES

oh look a puppo

oh no he’s gonna smell it

JOELS OANICKING????

oh good we’re good okay we’re good

oh wow the outside wall looks so good

Oh man jackson looks so so so good

gosh this is so great

HER LOOKING BACK AT JOEL CAUSE SHES SMILING

TOMMYYYYYYYY

OH LOOK AT JOELS FACE

TOMMYS LAUGH

look at Ellie :(( she’s never seen him so happy or hug someone

HIS SMILR MY FODHEKFHEKDV LOOK AT HIM SMILE LOOK AR MY SWEET LITTTLR BLORBO

JOEL APOLOGZING FOR ELLIE. LETS MIND OUR MANNERS

“WHATS WRONG WITH YOU” 😭😭

“Ellie!” He’s so frustarted 😭😭

sometimes he sounds like such a texan it’s hilarious

JOEL SAY CONGRATS. CONGRATS.

seven years ago wow

CAN YOU TEACH ME HOW NO HE CANT

SHEEEEEEP

oh so they have a council

300 people? Wow

SO UH COMMUNISM

SHIMMER NO WAY NO WAY

EMPTY HOUSE ACROSS THE STREET

“We’ve been doing fine”

“Joel” “you’ll be fine” much like the game in the hydroelectric plant

“You on the other hand”

BACON PSHOOO

so how’s Tess :( SHES FINE. ALRIGHT.

ANS THE KID?? OH YEAH. AHES THE DAUGHTER OF SOME FIREFLY MUCKETY MUCK.

U OF EC

weeks ride south ok

it’ll be easy for us

WHAT CAUSE TOUR WIFI WONT LET YOU. SHE KEPT HIM OFF THE RADIO??

am I the wrong people :(

and I don’t judge you for it. We survived the only way we knew how. But there were other ways we just didn’t know how

IM GONNA BE A FATHERS. A FEW MONTHS ALONG. WRITE ON THIS?!

Fuck

I FEEL LIKE ID BE A GOOD DAD

GUESS WELL FIND OUT

JUST BECAUSE LIFE STOPPED FOR YOU. SARAH BEINF LIFE. WRITE ON THISSSSS

yeah this is Christmas time isn’t it cause it’s September.when they met?? oooh he must be reminded so much of old Christmas with Sarah

oh not the little girls. HE PROBABLT BENT DOWN AND HUGGED SARAH JUSF LIKE THAT

unless they’re pulling the whole Alyssa card??

A NOTE WITH IM ACTOSS THE STREET 😭😭

THEY HAVE RANCH ARGUMENT IN HERE?????

even her sweater is similar to ranch argument wow

their house is blue how cute

OH WOW A BOARD FOR SARAH?? Ans kevin??

“World class salons” 😭

AWWW SHE GETTING A HAIRCUT

“I put bad guys in jail”

FUCK SHE DOESNT KNOW ABOUT SATAH

FUCK RUCK FUCK

SARAH WAS JOELS FAUGHTER

FUCK

“I GUESS THAT EXPLAINS HIM A LITTLE” THATS WHAT I SAIDDDDD

picture picture please picture

she really doesn’t trust him at all. But Ellie does and she doesn’t believe Maria’s word

they really got a while movie theater

WORK BENCH

are we having another argument

new boots :(

the way he’s holding his hands is giving major nervous vibes

“I shouldn’t have said what I said” - just like Joel last episode

“It’s complicated for you. And I’m sorry”

Is it a suicide mission?

HE LOOKS SO TINY 🤏🏻🤏🏻

“She’s immune”

THE WAY HE SAID ELLIE FEELS SOOOOO GAMEJOEL

“SHES IMMUNE” HE LOKKS SOOOOOOO

Below is the root of my mental illness.

“Tess got bit. She made me swear to take the kid. It was her dying wish, what was I supposed to do? WE MADE IT AD FAR AS KC AND THEN YNOW !SHE SAVED MY LIFE THERE! FROM ANOTHER KID. FIVE YEARS AGO I WOULDVE DESTRYOED HIM. BUT SHE HAD TO SHOOT HIM TO SAVE ME. FOURTEEN YEARS OLD. BECAUSE I WAS TOO SLOW AND TOO FUCKING DEAF TO HEAR HIM. THEN I SAW A MAN KILL HIS OWN BROTHER. **he’s crying whatfuckfuck** TO SAVE HER WHILE INJUST WATCHED. AND TODAY I THOUGHT THAT DOG WAS GONNA TEAR HER APART BECAUSE IT SMELLED SOMETBINF ON HER. AND ALL INDID WAS STAND THERE. I **COULTN MOVE** I COULDNT THINK OF ANYTHING EXCPET JUST. I WAS SO AFRAID. ANS HIS DHAKY BREATH. WHAT THE FUCK. IM NOT WHO INWAS. IM WEAK. ***LATELY THERE ARE THESE MOMENTS WHERE FEAR COMES UP OUT OF NOWHERE AND MT HEART FEELS LIKE ITS STOPPED. I HAVE DREAMS. EVERY NIGHT. INDONT KNOW. I CANT REMEMBER. I JSUF KNOW THAT WHEN I WAKE UP IVE LOST SOMETHING. IM FAILING IN MY SLEEP. ITS ALL I DO. ITS ALL IHE EVER DONE IS FAIL HER AGAIN AND AGAIN. ****IM JUSF GONNA GER HER KILLED I KNOW IT***

******I HAVE TO LEAVE HER****

WELL HERES TOUR FHANVE TO BRING YOUR KID INTO A BETTER WORL. YOURE TOUNGER THAN ME YOURE ATILL STRONG. YOU SAID IT YOURSELF YOULL COME BACK. YOU HAVE TO TSKE HER AND THE CRYINF AND THR SHAKY BREATH FUCKSHDNFIFJ

he loves her so much ellie. got it’s written all over his face. he loves her SO MUCU AND HE CANF DO IT

“They’ll shoot her” AND THE BOICD CRACK WAYT FCUKC. HE THREATENEE TO SHOOT HER EVERY SCENE AND NOW??;?);?4)?;!:?;?

IFS THE LAS THING ILL EVER ASK OF YOU. I SAEAR.

thr fucking falling tear you’re fucking joking. LET HIM BE FUCKING HAPPY.

he’s literally shaking.

I’ll take her out at dawn.

hea gonna go say goodbye and they argue that’s what happens right.

the slow walk up. fuck duck fuck fuck tuck

“Ellie?

if you’re gonna ditch me ditch me

I HAVE TO LEAVE HER TOU HAVE TO TAKE HER

I MADE THIS DECISION FOR YOUR OWN GOOD

DO YOU GIHR A SHIT ABOUT ME OR NOT. OF COURSE I DO WAHT THR FUCK.

the slight face change at ‘her’. wow.

IM AFRIAD OF LOSINF YOUUUU

THE SNIFFLE. HEBDOESNT WANT TO DONTHIS

WRITE ON ALL OF THIS WRITE ON ALL ODNTHIS

Joel :(((

FLASHBACKL WHATDBS FUCKC

you can really see his nose scar wow

SARAH :((

so this is what they were talking about.

NOT HIM CRUINF FUCK OFF HES CRIED SOMKUCU TOFAY

HOW DOES HE TAKE HER HAXK HOW DOES HE TAKE HER BACK HOWWWW WE DOIN IT

is Joel here.

YEAH.

SNIFFLES ANYWAY.

YOU DESERVE A CHOICE. LETS GO.

that was fast 😭

Helping her up 😭😭

the eye close :(

BOTH OF YOU BTHERES A PLAGE HERE

LOOK HOW HAPPT SHE IS

ADIOS BIG BROTHER 😭😭

HER HANDS AROUKD HIS MIDDLE HER HANDS AROUKD HIS MIDDLE HER HANDS AROUND HIS MIDDLE

AWWWWWWWWWWWW

This is so fuckinf cute.

GOU DICK

HIS SMILE

FUCKI

I just did my job. WHIHC WAS BUILDING

SINGER???

THATS PRETTY COOL

HER CHEEK AGAINST HIS BACK HER CHEEK AGAISNF HIS FBSKDHEKHDKHD HER CHEESL AGAISNF HIS BACK AND HIS SMILE

THE FOOTBALL CONVERSATION

“But violent” 😭

we end on his injury don’t we

HIS LITTLE SMILES AT HER

“One step closer to you dream”

“Sort of adults”

WHATTHEY WANTED TO DO WITH THEIR LIVES THSTS FROM THR GAMEEEE

I WANGWS RO BE A SINGER. YOURE ALREADY ALIGHING. YOURE SIGNING FOR Me later. ITS THE LEAST YOU CAN DO FAIR ENOUGH.

FIRST TIME SEEIN A MONKEY IN THR GAMMEEEE

“Lookit” <3

this set looks so good

oh wow even that’s from the game oh wow

oh I can’t wait for the Instagram edits of these two after this episode

HIS GACE WHEN SHE SAIS THEY TURNED INTO MONKEYS

RAIDERSSSSS

THE HEADBUTT

YEAHHHB CHOKE HIM OUR JOEL

YEAHHHH CRACK HIS BECK JOEL FUCK YEAH

FUCK BE DUD IMPALE HIM STILL MY GOD

GOGOGOGOGOGO

JOEL OPEN YOUR EYEW OPEN YOUR EYES YOU GOTTA GET UP I CANF GET SO THIS WIRHOUT YOU INDONT KNOW WHWRE IM GOING

JOEL PLEASE JOEL PLEASE

IM TAKINF A RIDE WITH MY BEST FRIEND

[dittolicous]

i think im having my midlife crisis. cuz time is passing so fast and im just... so tired. so tired of spending everyday miserable and stressed and hoping tomorrow will be better, when it never is.

i dont want to have to struggle for another 10 years just to get a simple little home that isnt infested with roaches or has rats in the walls. i want to be able to get up in the morning to drink coffee and watch the news. see kids walking to school. learn to sew. go fishing every now and again. own a car. be able to sleep without fretting over which bill to pay before cutoff.

i. i dont feel like ill ever escape. the community around me doesn't care because im not homeless of suffering enough, because i can still work even if im a husk of a human. because everyone has to work or die. work or die.

ive spent thr last few days pouring over applications, loan possibilities, houses, financial aid, bills, etc. no jobs have reached back to me except scams or ones that are basically downgrades from what i already do. i look and i look and i look, i used that suggested google jobs thing, but all the good jobs are off the island, require 10000 years experience, have no benefits, or are all work that i utterly despise. i dont qualify for loans and make too much for financial aid.

and they always say the same thing. get rid of your pets (as if rehoming is even cheap or easy), get rid of internet, make sacrifises sacrifices and more sacrifices. get up at 4am to wait in food bank lines for old meat, leftover produce, and stale cake. constantly plead to strangers and justify your life. because thats just life! your not allowed to have nice things when youre poor, dont you know? if you do, then thats wasting money and we wont help you. you deserve what you get because happiness comes with money.

i just want out. and i guess jokes on them. if i rehome my pets, well, that would mean id finally be free to off myself. because im sorry to say, but theyre the only thing that holds me back. i hate this world. i wasnt built to survive here. i dont have any passions or drive or... anything.

i dont know why im here. just to suffer and be miserable until im too old and weak to work, to die alibe in a ditch.... i dont have anything worth anything.

and what makes me fucking laugh! is that the last time i went to my psych appointment i was like. i cant do this! im tired of being tired! and they pushed me to try their therapy again and that theyd get a case worker to call me and to think of all things i can change instead of what i cant... i agreed but was open with how i didn't have much faith in the system. how they failed me in the past and that makes me wary.

that was two weeks ago.

case worker never called me. therapist never called me. i cant change anything.

all because of stupid fucking bills and checks and jobs and money because no one deserves to live happy!

ill never escape. ill never have a live worth living. i dont have anyone to go to the movies or amusement parks with, no one who would drop by for coffee and a chat, no one to go to cons with. im just a little icon on a blue website. if i died tomorrow, if my queue ended... no one would mourn me not really. no one would cry. because im just broken and incapable of making genuine connections. id just be another quiet blog, a blip in the radar.

[luciditymoonsstuff]

Something fun that I ended up thinking about for ages

[me and a group of friends are doing a l o n g rp]

"cool asf though [It was based off a tik tok, the picture]

i want to implement it into here tbh-

only for a while

:0

ROMAN GOES INSANE AND CONTROLD THE DARK SIDES FOFJSNSNCNDDNDN

LOGAN IS NATURALLY A LIGHT SIDE SO HE DOESN'T COUNT—"

-Me

[logan became a dark side in this rp for a while]

"I REALLY WANNA IMPLEMENT THIS INTO THE WORLD FOR A WHILE.

roman going insane, for some unknown reason.[we'll get there later]

He decides to use his power, controlling the "dark" sides. Not including logan since he was made a light side, unlike virgil.

He's had that power for a while, not wanting to use it cause he thinks it bad.

Thats why hes going insane.

Why? no idea.

How do we fix that? No clue.

YET."

-Me

"Oml-

That would actually make really good since rn cause Roman has been spacing out for long periods of time rn so we could shape it into where it's like he's trying to keep being perfect and sane but he's breaking from the insane out"

-friend

"exactly.

He could be losing his sanity..

Maybe because he's geting corrupted..

Like the rp where virgil ducks out.

He's been in that space for to long, and it just builds up.

Logan isn't as affected since he's now technically a "dark" side.

Yet, patton and roman are still lights so they are affected.

The "corruption" from that ep maybe didn't break down and still lurking.

Roman getting more "corruption" than patton."

-me

"He could also be getting more because of Remus, with them being related and all"

-friend

"how are we gonna continue the plan?

I think we should go one at a time,

virgil first, then [whichever one you choose next, remus orr janus]

bUT.

What are you planning right now?

why is roman passed out?"

-Me

"He can just pass out for anything- we can just say it was cause the insanity and him hitting his head on the wall

anyway-

Idk I thought you were planning smthn-

I mean

We could do it to where Roman could kinda force Virgil to him and just kinda manipulate him into being his- idk- captive by saying he'll kill Janus and Remus or something if Virgil doesn't cooperate-"

-friend

"that roman has always had control over the darks, considering he pretty much made them. The lights are sort of no so much his creation so he doesn't have control over that.

I'm thinking more of hypnosis type thing.

Manipulation using hypnosis.

Controlling, or programming, them to do whatever he pleases."

-me

"How does he active it?

Not entirely sure.

Thinking of a few possible theories on how he controls it and how he actives it.

He could just have a controller, literally.

It could be controlled by anger, or loss of sanity.

Something similar to the orange side.

Or, just something he could do with his hands.

Like a puppet master."

-me

"My mind automatically went to "fight to the death" after reading that and idk why

Mmm-

Maybe Roman can try to control them to become "King" since he's been a 'prince' since he was made?-

and-

You said 3 things, so maybe he could have a different thing for each one? Like Virgil being controlled by loss of sanity, to begin with, then Janus could be controlled with a controller of sorts and Remus being like a puppet since Roman is a Prince and Remus is a Duke, it's kinda like puppeteers with a puppet-"

-friend

"I was thinking maybe virgil and remus could be switched.

Due to thr fact remus and roman are brothers.

With telepathatly at that, which would make the most sense.

Able to control your own sibling with loss of sanity... a stretch but it makes somewhat sense.

Virgil could be the puppet.

He seemed to be viewed by people as a puppet to Janus' games and remus' tricks.

He is the 'puppet' in everyones strings, as everyone says."

-Me

"he feels disrespected and wants the respect he deserves and he feels like everyone secretly hates him and then the insanity is making those thoughts worse"

-Friend [the reason he's doin' this]

He could make the 'army'

[literally just the dark sides {minus logan since he was made a light-}]

He could feel like he was a part of something again.

The light sides have been failing apart since logan left... not so much because of Virgil.

He could try and get 'the band back together'

by getting the people around logan to manipulate logan into joining the lights once again

-me

The reason using the puppet hurts virgil.

The puppet is of course, connected to virgil.

Virgils soul, if thats what you want to call it, has been sort of went into the puppet. How? No clue. [yet]

Now, using the puppet will let whoever uses it take control of virgil.

Of his body.

Not himself fully.

His actual self is just stuck in his mind, tied down with the strings.

The strings are colored to whoever is using it.

Patton = light blue

Logan = dark blue

roman = red

Janus = yellow

Remus = green

you get the point.

It's tying him down, not letting him take control of his own body.

Until the puppet is taken away from that person

Yes. Anyone who gets it, is able to control virgil.

A big uh oh for our emo man.

-me

uhm-

my Creativities are workin' today ladies and gentlemen.

[purplecraze]

Beauty and the Beast AU 5

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 1:40 PM

He waved at thr birdy as it vanished, before laying back in bed, sighing.

Was there a world to say 'im fucking curious but also dont want to die'? Because thats how he was feeling right now

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 1:41 PM

Masochism.....

Well, considering the ruckus that was invoked about half an hour later, it didn't sound like it was worth the risk.

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 1:55 PM

Indeed but...

He got close to the door, and while he wasnt that stupid to open it, he took the key away and tried to peep from the keyhole, if he could see something of what was going on

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 2:03 PM

it was too dark to properly distinguish anything. And from what little sanity the monster had, it seemed to avoid this side of the castle. But it still passed by 2 times, throwing a chair and breaking it against the door.

Whatever out there was completely broken loose, worse than the 2 nights he had witnessed of it before.

And even though Narancia couldn't tell what it looked like, there was one thing he could discern from the limited view and abundant sounds:

Whatever it was, it was in pain.

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 2:08 PM

He scoot over as the chair hitted the door. Ok, new rule; dont go too close the door.

He sighed as he put the key back and layed down in the bed.

Narancia didnt really knew shit about curses or magic, but still he felt sorry about his host; being in pain like that sure was a bit too much of a punishment for only tired to fuck around a bit with magic right?

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 2:11 PM

The chaos quieted down after some time. Maybe it had exhausted itself? But the anguished screams and pitched squirms lasted throughout the night, resounding through the castle.

Once sunrise came, it was dead quiet once more.

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 2:15 PM

Nara managed to fall asleep after the sun was up; waking up kinda groggy and still sleepy, after all, even after all that noise, the bed was so soft snd confy...

"Nh...Ah! Shit is almost lunch time-!" He murmured taking off his nightdress and starting to wear the clothes for the next day, making sure to look good. He got in front of the mirror and combed his hair and made sure che cravat was not loose.

He did a little spin and giggled; the stuff sure looked fancy, no wonder rich people usually have maids to help them dress

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 2:27 PM

By the time he arrived in the dining room, someone was already there, sitting on the far opposite side of his usual spot.

He looked to be about his age, maybe a bit older. At first glance, he didn't seem very abnormal.

But he was very pale, and thin. It was clear to see he suffered from chronic lack of sleep and nourishment.

Also, what could be seen of his skin showed marks of wounds that recently closed. Most notable was that his arm was broken.

He held a complicated looking book in his good hand, looking up from it as the other approached.

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 2:31 PM

Holy shit that was a kid

In his head he imagined him young, dunno he 'sounded' young from he would write to him, but not a fucking kid of his age.

"Good morning!" He chirped, trying to not point the arm...God he hoped he knew some medical magic too

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 2:40 PM

"Good afternoon..." he replied, correcting him. He looked him over from his seat as well, as if he hadn't been able to do so properly until now with his little bird's help.

"You look disappointed. Expected something scarier?"

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 2:41 PM

"Ah- no just...h-how old are you??" He asked sitting down

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 2:42 PM

He blinked for a moment, considering how much time had passed since he bothered keeping track of time.

"16..."

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 2:57 PM

"...You are younger than me??" He asked a bit shocket "Im 17!"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 3:00 PM

"........" Fugo looked a tad skeptical, swallowing some words along the line of 'you don't look a day over 14'.

In stead, he cleared his throat.

"I'd like to apologize to you once more in person, for the inconvenience this place has caused you. If I had realized sooner, I wouldn't have given you those items... Was it the emblem? I suppose there's rumors about me, then.."

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 3:03 PM

"Ehy, to be fair im the one that got inside your house and stole your stuff, guess i kinda deserved it" He murmured taking a big bite then

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 3:04 PM

"No you didn't..." he spoke timid.

he didn't eat a lot more than some bread.

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 3:21 PM

"Mh..." he observed him

"Umh...does it hurt eat?"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 3:26 PM

".......? err.." He considered for a moment. "No. no, not exactly. uh.... in a way, perhaps...

Please, don't mind it. More importantly, mr. Ghirga: If you don't mind me asking, what has life been like for you? How are things outside this place?"

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 3:51 PM

Mr...?

"Ah- Narancia its just fine really!" He laughed awkardly

"And outside? Well i guess the same as always? If you ask about politic stuff i dont really know about it hah"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 3:53 PM

"Alright. Narancia....

I want to know about the every day life, it doesn't matter how insignificant."

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 4:11 PM

"Mhhh well its winter so there is not really a lot of interesting, but some shops have started to decorate for chirstmas! Its nice at least is not everything gray now; also the air is really dry so maybe it could even snow soon!"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 4:15 PM

"I can know the weather from around here too, it will probably snow in a few days.... Do you like the snow? What do you usually spend your day with?

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 4:33 PM

"Kinda? I mean im sure its better when younare inside haha...and well, i guess i just try to survive? In summer i find some jobs time to time, but in winter is a bit of just not dying in the streets kinda of game"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 4:34 PM

"And just when you think you've got it made, you're chased out for being cursed, huh?"

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 4:35 PM

"Guess im not really lucky haha, but i least i got some nice clothes for the winter!"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 4:39 PM

"The merchants who will deliver supplies in 4 days are.... not entirely sympathetic to my situation, but they at least know that it's not infectious. and they're in my service. They'll take care of you from next week forward, rest assured..."

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 4:45 PM

He took another bite and looked at him

"...why are you helping me?'

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 4:47 PM

"......" he pushed his fork around, not looking back at him. "...I don't get many visitors."

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 4:48 PM

"Mhh...Yknow i havent talked to someone of my age in a while too" he giggled

"Is kinda hard to make friends in the streets"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 4:50 PM

".........." The boy stared back at him. His eyes looked.... confused, almost panicked. and starved.

He stood up. "I should take my leave."

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 4:51 PM

"Uh ok--- You should do do something for that arm, and try to rest- im not gonna steal or touch stuff so dont worry and sleep a bit"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 4:52 PM

"That's not what I'm worried about... Again, take what you like, there's nothing I'm particularly attached to."

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 4:53 PM

"Umh ok-- anyway see you...umh, Tomorrow maybe? If you want we can keep eat lunch together!"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 4:55 PM

He glanced at him. there was something cold to his look.

"............Why?"

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 4:57 PM

"Why not? You keep talking to me with the bird, why not just chat face to face! Makes more sense to me"

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 5:01 PM

".............."

He walked a few paces towards him. Glancing over the table, he took a silent breath and lay his hand on a still untouched melon.

What first looked like a very appetizing piece of fruit turned into a shriveled pile of misery within the blink of an eye.

"........Does it make sense to you now?"

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 5:03 PM

Ok that was...creepy...And kinda explained why henlooked so perished

"Well as long we dont get too close i dont see the problem!" Sorry, he dosent give up easly

purplecraze — 08/28/2021 5:05 PM

Fugo turned off and left without any word aside from "Idiot."

orange-plane-boy — 08/28/2021 5:08 PM

Rude!

"See you tomorrow then!" He insisted, finishing his lunch before thinking about what he could do...mhh, the library seemed like one of the best option to spend time

[jiraikwei]

idk what i want and it kinda scares me . i want to feel something else but like the only other feelings im capable of experiencing are bad and will make me suffer . i cant cope with anything well when i feel like shit i just fall into things i shouldnt do just for thr quick dopamine so i can distract myself and not think . if it were a year ago i could distract nyself by binge eating but i cant even do that now because i'd feel like shit afterwards . binge eating was honestly my only effective coping mechanism . i could just go home and eat something and i wouldnt have to think about anything in particular . i feel like im constantly dissociating at school and when im not dissociating i jusf feel like shit . literally the only things i enjoy are the things that temporarily take away my ability to just think about shit

i think i might have both bpd and avpd or anxious avoidant personality attachment style whatever . they conflict with eachother and it constantly feels like im in a limbo and that i never feel happy with what i have . im horribly lonely when im alone abd i just want someone to talk to but when i have someone im suffering so hard and im ao paranoid and i dont know if they love me wnough and i just want them to leave me alone because they make me feel so bad . i feel like im just not built for friendships at all , i dont think friendships contain a strong enough connection for me to ever feel truly safe with them . i feel like most people just seek out friendships so they can get emotionally jerked off and not actually want to have genuine conversations or connectuons with the other person , i probably do that too . ive only ever had one friendship that didnt turn out like shit and we're still very surface level with eachother wmotionally i feel weird even telling her thag i like girls . i dont understand how other people can have friends that genuinely like them . i need someone who loves me and i need someone to love , i need someone to have an actual feeling of romantic love towards me like i do towards them not just ' like ' . and i dont think im fucking entitled or selfish for wanting that btw or that i need to hit my ugw before i deserve that . im so sixk of people telling me that they ' like ' me and then not wanting to actually fucking listen to me or do shit with me . i srsly dont understand how people tell me they like me and not want to do anything with me . like ok so you dont want to call . you dont want to hang out . you dont even want to play a game with me well what is the fucking point lol . and im not an ai bot you can just ignore and then feed your journal entry of a message into so i can generate some sort of response ACTUALLY FUCKING TALK TO ME holy shit . if you dont like me you can just leave and buy a diary because i guarantee if you start pulling that bullshit on me i seriously will not care enough to continue the friendship jdjdjcidnbdiiwncjeiwkvnjdkdm hekdkvidifjhelwkfkkfkekfkvkkkfffjdjdjdoeofjeiwkdcnjsjaksncjdjwkdkjdjejd is there anyone in this world that actually cares for other people im so sick of people manipulatinf me / not caring about me / being an asshole to me / wanting ro ruin me or just getting close cuz they want to fuck me omg kys kus kys kys kys it feels like thats all what anyone wants . its so hard to make friends . maybe i should turn full NEET and sever contacrs with everyone cuz it feels like everyone inherently hates or wants ti manipulate eachother . BUT IM SO FUCKING OINELY AND I WANT TO TALK TO PEOPLE ifigjjejwwowfkjgkdovkfisisidkfjjssikchcjdjskicjvididjvjfjdjjcicjdfjfjcjjdidifnfjdifjvjdjdjcicidkdbfjcidkjdifjfjfjdjdjfjfjsjdkfnncjfjfnddfjfidnndhfjcjdndncjcjjsndncjdjjdjfbcbdjjdjfncncjdjdjsoaidhfjcidksjgfjcjwbufkdjsijfndichsjdgwbajhxbckfiriwikcjcjeicjnfnefjf i dont even mnow if anything j say is actually true . indont know if people stop caring about me or if im the one who leaves . idkkkkk idkkkkkkkkkkkk i wish j was an adult so i could just drive somewhere like to the store and just chill instead of writing some gay ass blog post the morning before school this is so stupiddddd bye bc i literwlly have nothing wrong with me im just hotwiring my brain to think i have bpd and avpd im just a pathetic eprson

[kashilascorner]

Galaxy's Child made me sad because I kind of feel sorry for Geordi. Not because I think what he did was ok. Rather, I'm sad that this is a recurring theme for him (his inability to form romantic relationships, at least as a supposedly straight man) and I think it's probably more to blame on the writers rathen than the character himself. He rarely does things in bad faith and he doesn't have ban intentions.

But the whole thing with Leah was so creepy. I love her and I loved the actress too. She was very, very good at showing the all-too familiar discomfort of someone you don't like in that way making moves on you, and the discomfort and anger at a man being far too friendly and over familiar with you and even patronizing you. I'm glad in the end she calls him out when she finds the hologram program and rightfully feels furious and we get to see it!! All was off and creepy and uncomfortable. I like how Guinan tries to caution Geordi too.

But even if Geordi had been prefectly able to divorce his fantasy from the real Leah, to what point creating that holodeck program was even ethical in thr first place? Leah herself clearly estates that she feels "violated". And we are to pressume that Geordi is honest never used her image for anything other than geeking about the ship and having a romantic fantasy, but Leah will never know if that is all, if this really was innocent (because let's face it, even in a nonsexual context, it was not innocent) and most importantly she already feels her boundaries have been trespassed by this complete stranger who basically stalked her. He powered an IA with her image and ALL the info he had about her (or at least all he cared about). Ultimately I feel sorry for Geordi for not being able to form truly balanced relationships of this type and I don't think he's a bad guy at all. But I feel even worse for Leah, especially in today's world where the possibility of someone doing something very similar to that is becoming increasingly plausible. I feel for Leah because on a lower level, it's sadly incredibly relatable thats she's just trying to do her work and be professional while a man takes far too much familiarity with her and she has to overcome that discomfort to keep on going.

Ultimately what happened with Leah is completely unacceptable, she had every right to be mad at Geordi and set her boundaries and hell, even report him to the respective authorities for it (which she didn't do). What I HATE is the ending. Not so much because they make up and end up on good terms, but becuse it's done in a way that somehow places the blame on HER, her anger and her rightful plea for not being treated and used as an object. It also happens very fast so it seems sudden. And she's kinda the one to apologize rather than the other way around. And I hate the implication (?) that their relationship is cut short because she's married (the episode literally finishes with her leaving Geordi in the bar so she can meet her husband) and not because she is plainly and completely uninterested in this total stranger who has overstepped her boundaries completely begore he even met her.

[angeldiaries777]

life update maybe idek i just vent and its very personal and a little boring

im forgiving my family for my own sanity and well being. even if we're not as close as we used to be which is normal cuz were all getting older i hope that we can just stay civil and not toxic. im starting fresh. besides all of the mental trauama lmaoo. what im saying is im gonna try to create different thought patterns for myself and just maybe get on anxiety medication so i don't hurt others or myself. yeah. idc. but im tired of seeing people as my enemies. while i was a victim of abuse for a long time i cant deny it i just can't stay a victim anymore. sorry. i want to control my outcome. i don't think i will ever be good with certain relatives but i want to atleast be chill with my parents. yknow. and its not like those relatives are awful people. they're just average grown adults who didn't know how to speak to me when i was a child. nothing wrong with that. there were also good moments. i don't want to have such a negative view of my childhood because honestly it was pretty amazing compared to most i just also was scared of being happy because i thought id be stupid if i did things to help me cope better with my mental illnesses. im not. finally been staying consistent with brushing my teeth for thr first time in 2 years and eating more. not like a ton cuz its difficult for me after a restrictive ed however progress is progress. i just really want to make the last few months and next year really count. knowing that love from a distance is possible and even healthy. goodbyes are normal and ill figure it out with time. for once in my life i feel as if the world isn't on fire anymore and that i might be okay. still mentally ill. just learning that its okay to heal at ur own pace. and just cuz u thought something negative doesn't erase all of the good that you have done recently. honestly my goals now are to gain more mental clarity and to learn more about life and this world. i want to be ready for adulthood. time is going to pass regardless might aswell try and be present. and i know what i've been through. and no one else needs to validate me. and confidence. gonna work on my confidence issues aswell. not regarding my looks. physically im literally the girl that 7 year old me wished she looked like and while that makes me beyond happy i want to be confident in my beauty and for who i am as i learn who i am. and what i actually believe in. where my morals stand and such. basically ive i don't want to say matured because thats true but ive felt that way before i think i have just actually realized that theres an entire world out there outside of my anxiety brain and that i am fully capable of love and living a healthy happy life. no matter how difficult it was and will continue to be considering im human i know there will be other tough times. and ive already overcome so much at such a young age i just feel ready almost for whatever is next. mental illness and my relationship with it oh my god that could have its own post entirely i think i will stop typing tonight because my fingers hurt but i want to write about how healing with mental ilness feels especially with brain fog omg that would be super interesting and

[periwinklemeanderings]

Auguries of InnocenceBY

WILLIAM BLAKE

To see a World in a Grain of Sand

And a Heaven in a Wild Flower

Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand

And Eternity in an hour

A Robin Red breast in a Cage

Puts all Heaven in a Rage

A Dove house filld with Doves & Pigeons

Shudders Hell thr' all its regions

A dog starvd at his Masters Gate

Predicts the ruin of the State

A Horse misusd upon the Road

Calls to Heaven for Human blood

Each outcry of the hunted Hare

A fibre from the Brain does tear

A Skylark wounded in the wing

A Cherubim does cease to sing

The Game Cock clipd & armd for fight

Does the Rising Sun affright

Every Wolfs & Lions howl

Raises from Hell a Human Soul

The wild deer, wandring here & there

Keeps the Human Soul from Care

The Lamb misusd breeds Public Strife

And yet forgives the Butchers knife

The Bat that flits at close of Eve

Has left the Brain that wont Believe

The Owl that calls upon the Night

Speaks the Unbelievers fright

He who shall hurt the little Wren

Shall never be belovd by Men

He who the Ox to wrath has movd

Shall never be by Woman lovd

The wanton Boy that kills the Fly

Shall feel the Spiders enmity

He who torments the Chafers Sprite

Weaves a Bower in endless Night

The Catterpiller on the Leaf

Repeats to thee thy Mothers grief

Kill not the Moth nor Butterfly

For the Last Judgment draweth nigh

He who shall train the Horse to War

Shall never pass the Polar Bar

The Beggars Dog & Widows Cat

Feed them & thou wilt grow fat

The Gnat that sings his Summers Song

Poison gets from Slanders tongue

The poison of the Snake & Newt

Is the sweat of Envys Foot

The poison of the Honey Bee

Is the Artists Jealousy

The Princes Robes & Beggars Rags

Are Toadstools on the Misers Bags

A Truth thats told with bad intent

Beats all the Lies you can invent

It is right it should be so

Man was made for Joy & Woe

And when this we rightly know

Thro the World we safely go

Joy & Woe are woven fine

A Clothing for the soul divine

Under every grief & pine

Runs a joy with silken twine

The Babe is more than swadling Bands

Throughout all these Human Lands

Tools were made & Born were hands

Every Farmer Understands

Every Tear from Every Eye

Becomes a Babe in Eternity

This is caught by Females bright

And returnd to its own delight

The Bleat the Bark Bellow & Roar

Are Waves that Beat on Heavens Shore

The Babe that weeps the Rod beneath

Writes Revenge in realms of Death

The Beggars Rags fluttering in Air

Does to Rags the Heavens tear

The Soldier armd with Sword & Gun

Palsied strikes the Summers Sun

The poor Mans Farthing is worth more

Than all the Gold on Africs Shore

One Mite wrung from the Labrers hands

Shall buy & sell the Misers Lands

Or if protected from on high

Does that whole Nation sell & buy

He who mocks the Infants Faith

Shall be mockd in Age & Death

He who shall teach the Child to Doubt

The rotting Grave shall neer get out

He who respects the Infants faith

Triumphs over Hell & Death

The Childs Toys & the Old Mans Reasons

Are the Fruits of the Two seasons

The Questioner who sits so sly

Shall never know how to Reply

He who replies to words of Doubt

Doth put the Light of Knowledge out

The Strongest Poison ever known

Came from Caesars Laurel Crown

Nought can Deform the Human Race

Like to the Armours iron brace

When Gold & Gems adorn the Plow

To peaceful Arts shall Envy Bow

A Riddle or the Crickets Cry

Is to Doubt a fit Reply

The Emmets Inch & Eagles Mile

Make Lame Philosophy to smile

He who Doubts from what he sees

Will neer Believe do what you Please

If the Sun & Moon should Doubt

Theyd immediately Go out

To be in a Passion you Good may Do

But no Good if a Passion is in you

The Whore & Gambler by the State

Licencd build that Nations Fate

The Harlots cry from Street to Street

Shall weave Old Englands winding Sheet

The Winners Shout the Losers Curse

Dance before dead Englands Hearse

Every Night & every Morn

Some to Misery are Born

Every Morn and every Night

Some are Born to sweet delight

Some are Born to sweet delight

Some are Born to Endless Night

We are led to Believe a Lie

When we see not Thro the Eye

Which was Born in a Night to perish in a Night

When the Soul Slept in Beams of Light

God Appears & God is Light

To those poor Souls who dwell in Night

But does a Human Form Display

To those who Dwell in Realms of day

Source: Poets of the English Language (Viking Press, 1950)

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/43650/auguries-of-innocence

[thesquireinvictus]

Auguries of Innocence BY WILLIAM BLAKE To see a World in a Grain of Sand And a Heaven in a Wild Flower Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand And Eternity in an hour A Robin Red breast in a Cage Puts all Heaven in a Rage A Dove house filld with Doves & Pigeons Shudders Hell thr' all its regions A dog starvd at his Masters Gate Predicts the ruin of the State A Horse misusd upon the Road Calls to Heaven for Human blood Each outcry of the hunted Hare A fibre from the Brain does tear A Skylark wounded in the wing A Cherubim does cease to sing The Game Cock clipd & armd for fight Does the Rising Sun affright Every Wolfs & Lions howl Raises from Hell a Human Soul The wild deer, wandring here & there Keeps the Human Soul from Care The Lamb misusd breeds Public Strife And yet forgives the Butchers knife The Bat that flits at close of Eve Has left the Brain that wont Believe The Owl that calls upon the Night Speaks the Unbelievers fright He who shall hurt the little Wren Shall never be belovd by Men He who the Ox to wrath has movd Shall never be by Woman lovd The wanton Boy that kills the Fly Shall feel the Spiders enmity He who torments the Chafers Sprite Weaves a Bower in endless Night The Catterpiller on the Leaf Repeats to thee thy Mothers grief Kill not the Moth nor Butterfly For the Last Judgment draweth nigh He who shall train the Horse to War Shall never pass the Polar Bar The Beggars Dog & Widows Cat Feed them & thou wilt grow fat The Gnat that sings his Summers Song Poison gets from Slanders tongue The poison of the Snake & Newt Is the sweat of Envys Foot The poison of the Honey Bee Is the Artists Jealousy The Princes Robes & Beggars Rags Are Toadstools on the Misers Bags A Truth thats told with bad intent Beats all the Lies you can invent It is right it should be so Man was made for Joy & Woe And when this we rightly know Thro the World we safely go Joy & Woe are woven fine A Clothing for the soul divine Under every grief & pine Runs a joy with silken twine The Babe is more than swadling Bands Throughout all these Human Lands Tools were made & Born were hands Every Farmer Understands Every Tear from Every Eye Becomes a Babe in Eternity This is caught by Females bright And returnd to its own delight The Bleat the Bark Bellow & Roar Are Waves that Beat on Heavens Shore The Babe that weeps the Rod beneath Writes Revenge in realms of Death The Beggars Rags fluttering in Air Does to Rags the Heavens tear The Soldier armd with Sword & Gun Palsied strikes the Summers Sun The poor Mans Farthing is worth more Than all the Gold on Africs Shore One Mite wrung from the Labrers hands Shall buy & sell the Misers Lands Or if protected from on high Does that whole Nation sell & buy He who mocks the Infants Faith Shall be mockd in Age & Death He who shall teach the Child to Doubt The rotting Grave shall neer get out He who respects the Infants faith Triumphs over Hell & Death The Childs Toys & the Old Mans Reasons Are the Fruits of the Two seasons The Questioner who sits so sly Shall never know how to Reply He who replies to words of Doubt Doth put the Light of Knowledge out The Strongest Poison ever known Came from Caesars Laurel Crown Nought can Deform the Human Race Like to the Armours iron brace When Gold & Gems adorn the Plow To peaceful Arts shall Envy Bow A Riddle or the Crickets Cry Is to Doubt a fit Reply The Emmets Inch & Eagles Mile Make Lame Philosophy to smile He who Doubts from what he sees Will neer Believe do what you Please If the Sun & Moon should Doubt Theyd immediately Go out To be in a Passion you Good may Do But no Good if a Passion is in you The Whore & Gambler by the State Licencd build that Nations Fate The Harlots cry from Street to Street Shall weave Old Englands winding Sheet The Winners Shout the Losers Curse Dance before dead Englands Hearse Every Night & every Morn Some to Misery are Born Every Morn and every Night Some are Born to sweet delight Some are Born to sweet delight Some are Born to Endless Night We are led to Believe a Lie When we see not Thro the Eye Which was Born in a Night to perish in a Night When the Soul Slept in Beams of Light God Appears & God is Light To those poor Souls who dwell in Night But does a Human Form Display To those who Dwell in Realms of day