#hurt myself with this one sorry

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

[tubbytarchia]

Just saw this Jimmy skin for the first time from back when he could still experience joy and whimsy and uh yeah I can't blame anyone for having any parental instincts towards him (looks at myself and my moots and Doc)

[misspanicdead]

When Eddie is little they play this game.

It starts late one night, when Eddie is supposed to be asleep, tucked up in the bed that used to be Wayne's but is now solely Eddie's. There's a freak thunderstorm that wakes him, and he wanders his way into the living room and into Wayne's lap.

It's still early in their relationship, Eddie still trying to feel Wayne out- figure out how much he really cares, how safe Eddie truly is here. So, wrapped up in a blanket, head tucked against Wayne's chest, Eddie asks "would you still love me if i slept here tonight?" Voice barley audible over a crack of unexpected thunder.

It continues from there. Eddie asking random little questions at odd times. A "would you still love me if i turned purple?" at bedtime. A "would you still love me if i ate all the cheerios?" at the grocery store. Even one very memorable "would you still love me if i was a worm?" on a rainy day- he'd stopped midsplash in a puddle to ask Wayne that one, face scrunched up in seriousness.

Every time, without fail, Wayne always answers that yes, he will still love Eddie, even then.

Even as Eddie gets older and the questions get more serious, Wayne's answer never wavers.

Never.

-

When he comes home from work one morning to find Eddie sitting on the couch awkwardly, hands trapped behind his back, trying his level best to look casual, and asks "if i almost got busted tonight and needed you to pick the lock on some handcuffs, would you still love me?" Eddie's smile is impish, shy, but there's real fear sitting in his eyes. Wayne sighs, gets a drink, and works on setting his nephew free.

(It takes nearly an hour and three bobby pins, but Wayne still gives the kid a gruff "yes" before kissing his hair and going off to bed.)

-

"Would you still love me if i didn't graduate again?" Eddie asks, voice scratchy and eyes red rimmed. There's a bag sitting by his feet, overflowing with Eddie's things, like his boy is expecting Wayne to kick him out for this.

"I'll always love you, kid. And this will always be your home," he says, picking up the bag and dragging it back to Eddie's room where it belongs.

-

..."Would you still love me if i was gay?" It's barley a whisper, shaky and tear filled. Eddie's sitting on the far end of the couch, like he's afraid he might need some distance here and that simply won't do. Wayne stands- knee cracking painfully- and sits down next to his boy. Wraps an arm around him and pulls him into his side. He still fits like he did when he was seven.

"You listen here, and you listen good," Wayne says, "There is nothing that you could ever do or be that would make me stop loving you. Not a single damn thing."

"What if i, like, murdered somebody?" Eddie jokes wetly. Tears are starting to spill down his cheeks and Wayne knows that he's seconds away from sobbing.

Wayne sighs. "Shit, I'd probably help you hide the body." A laugh bursts out of Eddie and then they're off, laughter quickly turning into tears. Wayne holds him through it, letting a few tears of his own drip into Eddie's unruly hair.

-

Wayne thinks about this when he's sitting on his porch steps, smoking a cigarette and waiting for the cops to come. A dead girl lying on his living room floor behind him.

Eddie is gentle. Sweet. That just isn't in his nature to do. And Wayne knows that. Will fight tooth and nail to prove that, to find where his boy is.

Because just like he always said, he still loves Eddie.

[tv1xx]

ican’t help myself.

[jazzzzzzhands]

i broke my ankle today! so ofc i must project myself onto Wally as usual! i dont know how to use or draw crutches!

[canisalbus]

i’ve been in a lot of undiagnosed pain recently and struggling with medical care for it, but your art and bits of lore have been giving me a wonderful distraction. you have my gratitude and appreciation!

I'm sorry to hear you've been in pain and not getting the proper treatment for it, that's awful. But I'm glad my art and ramblings have been able to take your mind away from it. I hope things work out for you soon!

[emece-sp]

Come on guess who my favorite SCP doctor (and author) is, Bonus

Tiny bug

[almond-tofuuu]

Nearly Mine

Zayne x reader

Warnings: ANGST, no comfort just pain (bc I hate myself 🙂) unrequited love

lmk if I missed anything

Watching the excited smile spreading across your face made Zayne's heart flutter in his chest. His own mouth curling up ever so slightly as he listened to your melodic voice, a sound he had grown to love more than any piece of music.

He couldn't help but admire every little detail about you. The late afternoon sun illuminating your face, enhancing your beauty into something he could only describe as ethereal. He loved the way your eyes shone, or how they'd light up in excitement whenever you visited his office, their colour had quickly become his favourite. And your lips, so soft and kissable, he loved how they'd form the most tender smiles, or release the angelic sound of your laughter. To Zayne, every part of you was perfect. And if he looked hard enough, if he focused solely on the you in front of him, maybe he could forget about the band of silver encircling your finger. But that was nearly impossible with how eagerly you were displaying it to him. Because that's why you came to see him today, not for a checkup but to announce your engagement.

Zayne did everything that was expected of a good friend. He congratulated you, listened as you happily told him all about the proposal, he even managed to smile as he expressed how happy he was for you. It was only when you skipped out of his office, smiling softly and waving him goodbye, only then did he let the facade fall. His ever cool composure cracking, shattering like ice, much like the broken pieces of his heart.

He wasn't angry at you, he could never be, after all this wasn't your fault. No, his anger was aimed solely at himself. He'd lost count of the times he had nearly confessed to you, words and feelings bubbling to the surface before being strangled by his own fear. Thoughts of what-ifs overwhelmed his mind, conjuring up countless scenarios of how things could've been, each one driving deeper the knife that had become lodged in his heart the moment you showed him your engagement ring. Because that thin band of metal was confirmation of Zayne's greatest fear; that you weren't his, and now you never would be.

[kobb4ni2]

Here's a good one!

Sea Serpent Reader ranking on who she loves to visit the most!

YEEES YEEES I LOVE TO DO RANKINGS

And uuuh I REALLY GOT CARRIES AWAY SO IM SO SORRY ABOUT THAT😓😓

Least Favourite to most favourite place to go list by [Name]

Mariejois: Celestial Dragon and when there’s a Reverie there’s gonna be a lot of snobby royals she has to protect. Should I bring the list. And the same goes to God Valley.

Marine Headquarters: Sea Serpent! Reader is almost ALWAAAAYS there because of strict rules, the reason why it’s not the same rank as Mariejois, it’s because of the few good marines there like Coby, Corazon, Fujitora and etc, but she’s always trapped there either at meetings or at her room that the Gorosei made for her. They won’t even let Sea Serpent! Reader have student of her own!

Enies Lobby: It bring bad memories especially the gate of justice, the place just shows how corrupt the world government and how they will do anything to keep anyone shut, the lengths they will go for no secrets to leak out.

Dressrosa: It’s a wonderful country with beautiful culture, dances, food and people but most of the “people” there are toys. Doflamimgo reassures to you that nothing wrong with the country even though you senses tells you otherwise. No matter how gorgeous the country is there’s a gut feeling that something is incredibly wrong

Wano: While at the gorgeous capital of Wano, resides or at Onigashima, everything you want will be at your knees (cuz ur tall teheheh). Everytime you wake up in your futon you’d be gifted with flowers that was hand picked by one of the Tobi Roppo or even King, Queen, Jack themselves. And when you eat glistening meat and tasty juice are prepared at your table with a sober Kaido, it’s a wonderful place he’s but the treatment of the people makes you feel guilty whenever you eat even one piece of meat. The pirate world is extremely harsh.

Egghead: You may be a history geek but you’re not one to deny anything that strives to be futuristic, the human mind or the mind of others is extraordinary. It’s a wonderful place that you must be extremely lucky to even step foot in it. Even though it’s a government land, Egghead gives Sea Serpent! Reader a lot of freedom. But the dark stories that King told about made Sea Serpent! Reader back off to Egghead island especially when Vegapunk was the one deducing the experiment and the pacifistas were the ones to fully show how bad it is to Sea Serpent! Reader’s eyes.

Totto Land: Land of a Yonko and the commanders or higher ups of the Big Mom are enchanted by you. People there are incredibly nice to you, at the castle of Big Mom, her younger children would always bother you always asking when are you gonna be called [Name] Charlotte, if you look around you can see the 3 sweet commanders having a big blush on their face, Katakuri raising his scarf while daydreaming the day of your wedding and when he as to put a ring on your finger and after that you bend over to kiss him on his lips, Smoothie turning her head around so her hair could block the blush adorning on her face, Cracker using the palm of his hands and secretly biting on it, trying his best not to scream that he’s still not married yet, all 3 are just imagining how your future kids will look like <3

Amazon Lily: Not only is this place made surrounded with your Sea King friends but it’s an island full of women! You never felt so comfortable whenever you’re there! Boa would daze at you as you munch at the feast she prepared but unlike Wano, the residents there aren’t being mistreated too much unlike Kaido.

Sabaody Island: Your good pal Raleighy and his wife- Shakky now resides there as commoners, late night talk with them with alcohol in your, Rayleigh and Shakky’s systems, such conversations are accompanied with laughs underneath the orange light, with Rayleigh’s voice slowly becomes much more deeper as he leans closer to you, Shakky’s hands slithering on your legs like the former Kuja princess she is, Shakky may or may not have put your glass with a much more stronger alcohol. Wait I’m getting carried away.

Baratie: The food are absolutely amazing there! The conversation with Zeff and the oceans are amazing too!

Skypiea: The Sky brings the ocean its natural blue hues and to touch the fluffy clouds were one of the many dreams little snake [Name] wanted to walk and when [Name] found out that there was indeed a sky island, she immediately went to work to how she can reach that island, and oh boy why she not disappointed. So if the sky is not the limit for adventures what is? Such question made Sea Serpent! Reader yearn for more adventures with Joyboy.

Zou and Fishmen Island: Both are close to her heart, Fishmen Island was made from her hands of course she has a deep relationship with the island, like a mother to her kid, the same thing goes to Zunesha that’s carrying Zou, [Name] likes to visit the minks from time to time, they even make a whole town feat whenever she comes to visit they know how valuable you are, the little minks are always on your side asking about your adventures which you joyfully tell. At the end of the day when every mink is asleep you would softly talk to Zunesha, both your conversation would be complied with the water splashing of each step Zunesha takes.

Logue Town: "The town of the beginning and the end" When Sea Serpent! Reader woke up there was this instinct to go to the place, and that’s when she met the future Pirate King - Gol D Roger.

Laughtale: The legacy of Joyboy and precious place for Sea Serpent! Reader.

Zacharias Barnham of you can hear me, please inquisitor of the underrated game of Phoenix Wright vs Professor Layton please save me🙏🙏🤞🤞🤞

[hamartia-grander]

Wyll breaking up with the player character if Ulder dies so Wyll must become the Duke makes me wanna throw up sobbing because he actually thinks that just because his father's first duty being to Baldur's Gate made him a Bad Father that Wyll himself will inevitably be a Bad Lover because surely no one could match love with duty if his father couldn't, unknowing he has more love in one hand than his father had in his entire body. fuck

[carpetbug]

i’ve never been super happy with how i color mari, decided to do a little test to shake off some art block

i like the ‘fixed’ coloring more as it’s just. pleasing on the eyes i guess?? and i like having small color differences for my au designs so im happy with mariblanc and feline blue designs :)

she is just a cutie at the end of the day really

[meziniart]

Maybe one day you'll understand why Everything you touch surely dies

[chrollohearttags]

my whole YouTube feed is filled with videos about the Stanley cup/Sephora kid thing and maybe bc I haven’t used tiktok in months but I’m so lost as to why everybody, including the kids themselves is being blamed for this problem lmao.

[plushie-lovey]

Alright, here's everyone who got necklaces today! Individual pics:

Also special shout-out to Cabbage, my small bulbasaur plush. His firm bulb was perfect to use for stretching out and shaping the string for each necklace to make them more elastic and more natural fitting

[afewproblems]

21 from the angst prompt list with Steddie could be devastating or silly. But I’m a big fan of devastating especially when you do it!

Prompt 21: This isn't What It Looks Like

Thank you so much for sending this in Nonny! I hope that I've done the request justice! 😊 I thought that this would fit really well in my WIP Lost and Lonely Just Like Heaven, ghost Eddie AU. You don't necessarily have to read it to still enjoy the feels (which a definitely inspired by the new Stranger Things Season Five set photos) but I would recommend it!

Anyways, please enjoy!

***

"Boy, you have about ten seconds to get the hell outta here before I put my foot up your ass," a gruff voice barks out from behind Steve. 

It's drizzling this morning, the drops make an audible pattern across the grass and stones around them and an ominous grumble of thunder in the distance threatens more to come.

Steve drops the rag in the bucket he brought with him and lifts his hands up; he knows who is standing behind him without turning around.

Wayne Munson. 

He has the same drawl in his voice that Eddie did, though slightly more pronounced, and really, who else would be here this early on a Sunday morning? 

"This isn't what it looks like," Steve says as he turns, still crouched down beside the gravestone, the new graffiti stands out, angry and red against the gray stone.

 

He gestures slowly at the bucket of soapy water and the brush hanging off the side, watching as the older man's eyes narrow slightly. 

Wayne looks tired, more haggard than when Steve had seen him at the school during the disaster relief event. His denim jack hangs off of his shoulders and no amount of salt and pepper stubble can hide the way his cheeks have become so gaunt. 

"Haven't we been through enough," Wayne sighs heavily as he raises a hand to wipe down over his face, "you have to take away an old man's place to mourn his boy? I know what you people thought of him".

"Mr. Munson, please," Steve slowly stands up and takes a deep breath, "I'm a friend of Dustin's, I just wanted to help".

He points at the bucket again, "he hasn't been…" Steve swallows a heavy lump in his throat as he thinks of the way Dustin had sent him away the last time he went to see him. 

"He hasn't been good since…everything happened, and I just want to help because I know Eddie meant the world to him, to both of you". 

He doesn't mention the man standing in his peripheral vision, watching them both with a sad smile on his pale, scarred face. 

He also doesn't mention the way Dustin looked at Steve when he told him to get out of his life.

Steve blinks, ignoring the sharp sting in his nose as he tries to will away the moisture gathering at his lash line.

Eddie mouths something at him, but he can't hear it over the sound of the rain as the patter increases into a downpour. 

He blinks again and Eddie is gone.

Steve considers telling Wayne, but the other man still looks like he's about five seconds from telling Steve to go fuck himself, and if Dustin wasn't ready to hear it, he's certain Wayne won't be either.

Wayne is still staring at Steve, his jaw shifts as though he's chewing on the words he wants to say, 

"That boy, Dustin," Wayne says softly now, "he's a good kid, s'the only other one who came to talk to me other than Ed's band mates".

Steve nods, he knows Dustin is a good kid, that's part of the reason why his dismissal the other night hurt so goddamn much.

"I just want to make things better," Steve whispers into the rain, he watches as his breath collects in front of him in the cool morning air. 

Wayne shakes his head, gesturing at the head stone, the one with bright red words painted across the name Edward Munson. 

"There is no better kid, not for me at least". 

He sighs, long and low, and reaches into his jacket pocket for a crumpled pack of smokes. Wayne pulls a lighter from the same pack and cups his hand over the igniter to save it from the rain, flicking it again and again until he throws the plastic away from himself with shaking hands. 

Wayne drops the unlit cigarette into the wet grass and fixes Steve with a new angry glare, "you should go, we don't need any help, you're just going to draw more attention to it".

"But--"

"I told you to go," Wayne barks out, his pale face flushes as he takes a step towards Steve and the gravestone, "I don't know you from Adam, and I'm sure you mean well".

Steve takes a step back in surprise, and hurt, he wishes Robin had come with him. She was always better at explaining things, even if her word vomit often got them into more trouble than they were aiming for, she still managed to get the words out. 

"I won't ask again," Wayne says softly now, his face turned away towards the edge of the cemetery. 

Steve swallows hard and nods. He picks up the bucket from the ground and slowly makes his way back to the sidewalk. 

Steve takes a deep breath, forcing himself not to turn around, even as he hears Wayne fall to his knees at the grave. The thunder does nothing to drown out the way the older man begins to cry. 

[swordheld]

how did u choose your username?

oh, this is a fun one!! i think i considered being swordtold at first, for that very ancient myth vibe of the sword being this narrative tool for adventure and structure and physical time, the parable being passed down through the centuries until it meddles into modern day rhetoric and ideology – a kind of fantastical tool, a spark of magic, of possibility.

i like the arc of the story of a place being physical / having it be held by time and hand alike, wearing with the years and having it become something different to each holder, each reader, each experience fantastical and individual.

having that kind of physicality to it; swordheld is the action of taking up and holding the sword yourself, choosing your own narrative, leading your own story. self-identity has always been something i struggle with (a novel concept i know, i know), so it felt right for this blog, since most of my older blogs before this one have been just me silently reblogging and never really posting anything myself, and i wanted this to be the change to that.

i've always had trouble wranging my social anxiety, esp. on the internet, and previously thought that keeping my words to myself helped keep the timeline cleaner, in a way, no messy thoughts for others to sort through, especially ones i believed no one would want to read anyway? but it never felt right, keeping myself apart from it all, esp. not in the way i so avidly enjoyed reading others' posts and additions, keeping their words close to my heart.

i wanted it to reflect that this was a space i was holding for myself? and i'm a little slow on the uptake sometimes, but this - this i think i got right. i love being here, on this blog, and the joy that it brings me. everyone else enjoying it too has been a wild ride that i never expected, and still surprises me, one that brings a little extra thrill to my heart whenever i think about it.

i had other urls that i liked, but i didn't want this blog to be tied directly to any of my fandom/story interests, since i wanted it to really just be a sort of archive of artistic inspiration and resource, like a little library or museum. i use them now as lil sideblogs of more niche interests now, which is rather lovely.

it hasn't always felt like it fit perfectly, the way that i'd like, but for some reason i can't think of really wanting to change it anytime soon. it feels mythic yet modern in a way that feels like puzzle pieces finally slotting into their place, something my own and inspirational to me, like a lantern i'm holding to make my way by. my own kind of light, if that makes sense – a star i know by name.