#i Am working on the commissions i just wanted to post. kitty

[vivipokedex]

#0300, #0301

Skitty, Delcatty

[leidensygdom]

well @voidsteeth has given me the power to ramble a bit more. PLEASE ignore the cat in that picture, for some goddamn reason it's the only way tumblr let me post this goddamn picture. it's a nice kitty, mind you

Up above, some really loose logo/main pic ideas for it! Excuse my terrible handwriting. Let me do it bullet-point format since it helps my adhd pin down stuff

So, it's gonna be a RPG. I wanna figure some fun gimmick and I surprisingly have a bunch of that well fleshed out! (Part of it revolving the elemental system, concerning Flesh/Memory/Mind/Matter/Soul). I'm not a huge fan of the repetitive encounter "smash everything in front of you" format. I'm going to be using RPG Maker MZ. My partner has a lot of experience with that, which should help a lot!

Inspired by a bit of a mix of classic JRPGs and more recent indie RPGs, specially Rpg Maker stuff. I've been raised watching my dad play the old Final Fantasy games (which I love dearly, specially IX, X and VII), but I've ended up loving the more recent indie scene myself (OFF, Oneshot, Undertale/Deltarune, Everhood)

(I'm gonna be playing more RPG Maker games to help with inspiration and knowing how much I can bend the system- Please feel free to recommend me some!)

Set in a sort of high fantasy setting, and it takes a bunch of stuff from the one I run my current DnD campaign in. I think it will feel familiar to DnD/PF players, but I'm going all in with my own worldbuilding! I wanna set myself apart from these.

I want to have a sort of in-game illustrated encyclopedia because I really dig that. I liked the way OFF used images here and there to add to the lore. I just love the idea of being able to collect pages and learn more on the way. I've sketched the ones for the elements already!

Themes will spin around friendship and human connection, eldritch horror flavoured stuff, and some temporal shenanigans too. It will also tackle on the importance of understanding the past- The story will put some focus on how people are too busy pillaging a ruined city to understand what actually destroyed it in the first place. Which, well, it's the kinda thing to have consequences.

I'm planning to work on this on my free time, and once it has a nice shape (and perhaps a playable demo), I may consider having a Kickstarter to complete it. I'm fairly confident I can handle (with enough time) most of the parts of it. I just need to get a bit familiar with pixel art (for the maps). I used to do that ages ago! I'm also familiar enough with programming and have done small web-games in the past.

The one thing I am absolutely not qualified enough for is music. I wanna try honing my skills but- Oh boy. (on that note, if you know of small musicians that are open for commissions, do let me know! Just as a very preliminary view)

also you can bet this is gonna be really LGBTQ+ themed. I wanna also take the chance to maybe sprinkle in some of my heritage's stuff, I've wanted to do that for ages!

I'm of course always open for specific questions about this. I'm really excited to work on it and help my mental health on the way. I'll do my best to share some concept art, mock ups and such as I get it more fleshed out! I have some enemies pinned down and I think people will really enjoy these designs : )

[elvenbeard]

WIP Whenever

I was tagged by @chevvy-yates @katsigian @genocidalfetus @just-a-cybercroissant @therealnightcity @pinkyjulien and @ouroboros-hideout (by some of you forever ago, I'm just in the middle of catching up with all the recent tags a bit XD) And tagging you all right back and everyone else who's reading this right now >:3c

My biggest WIP at the moment is still apartment renovations! Fixing holes and painting walls, but there's now only one corner left, then I'm fucking done and it can't sublty stress me anymore xD

I am having a real good time with the whole process though like... I have no idea yet how long I'm gonna live here, but no matter if it's 3, 5, 10 years, I sure as hell want it to be a cool place for the time being.

My kitty-approved Neo-Kitsch inspired Bedroom wall xD only that one wall, but I love it xD

Writing-wise, I've started the next chapter of "Love is Stored in the Olive Jar". I don't have much to share yet, but here's the opening lines:

V awoke coughing and choking, sputtering a red cloud across his pillow. He quickly sat up, his throat tight and scratchy, mouth like copper. His vision was blurry, he thought from sleep still at first, but no. Through visual glitches and blinding pain he could only just make out the dark red stains dripping from his nose and mouth onto the bedsheet. He gasped for air still, his chest hurting as if he had been stabbed.

Fun times :D

Art-wise I have been working on a secret gift for the cp2077 new year's exchange that I finished the other day :3 And I have some wips of the bois (TM) but I can only share one on tumblr for reasons:

Very professional photo of my iPad screen XDD This is still rough and subject to change, but the idea was basically, V and Kerry, a bunch of years post-2077 (like... 5-10 or so), just very comfy and happy and healthy ;__;

VP-wise I still have a couple of pics on the backburner, some I still wanna edit, and maaan ;__; I also recently got to test some friends' mods that I'm super excited for and share the pics of!!! <3

Aaaand... that's it XD I hope in the new year I can dive back into modding, once the renovations are done, and also get started with more regular commissions and streaming again, cause I've been missing both but yeah... you see my list of projects above, there's only so much time in a day xD

Thank you all again for the tags <33

[thelordfool]

i need help. again.

long and short of it: while i’m indeed working, a bunch of emergencies happened and i can’t afford to eat or pay the bills that are keeping me going to work. so i’m hoping the good will and kindness of people will shine through again.

for anyone that wants to see the proof and details, it’ll be below the cut. details on if you want to commission me so i can earn your money will also be down there. please share if you cannot comfortably donate. i will update the post as i get donations. i’m so sorry for doing this all the time. i just want it to stop.

Paypal.me/asrielelijahking / venmo: @thelordfool​ / CA: $thelordfool

$0/644.32

prelude: about me

i’m a disabled (CFS probably; severe chronic depression, ptsd, anxiety, definitely), queer (agender “trans masc” and wow people are pretty) artist that’s been having issues with employment for so long, and i know 100% my dr wont help me get a case for disability. i’ve gotten a job through a temp agency but the contract is month to month and i have no idea if i’ll be kept on. i’ll know by 10/7 if i still have a job on monday. there’s a few other things going on, like needing to repair my front door after my roommate’s kids kicked the glass and broke it, and needing to buy food both for the house and for the cats, but i’m trying not to worry about that at the moment because i’ve got the door covered in cardboard and there’s enough food for the next few days.

1. cat bills

After losing my cat, Cinderdoodle, on labor day, my eldest kitty, Scotty, needed to be taken into emergency. this was a huge, emotionally devastating blow to me. he’s thankfully alive and doing much better but the urinary diet food is very expensive. I’m only asking for help to cover the cost of the visit. I paid it on Care Credit and would really just like for it to go away as soon as possible.

2. personal medical bills

therapy’s fucking expensive! and i guess so is primary care. this is what i owe for both of them right now:

I do not have any more therapy scheduled currently. I’ll be unable to afford it anymore in the future, it appears.

3. rent

as some of you may know i live with my abusive ex because it’s either this or giving up my cats and entering homelessness. he’s been... better.... recently. i was able to work out that i can pay octobers rent in two parts to him, so i only owe him $190.

4. commissions info

if you search through the ‘my art’ tags on my blog you can find, well, my art. i am not going to change my prices again for this. art takes time, practice, and a lot of research and i’m proud of what i produce. here is my commissions sheet:

you can also check me out on twitter to see everything.

[scoop-lookatpinpeopleneedhelp]

Here’s one of my favorite things I’ve drawn. A couple years ago but it still holds up for me. There’s definitely a quite a few areas I would retouch but I wanna keep this in its final state. Please look at all of the donation posts I’ve linked and spread the word about all of them so the OPs can get the help they need. This drawing is all about US healthcare so it’s only right to shout out the people the system hurts the most, which is to say people without funds.

https://www.tumblr.com/maceofpentacles/718858604884721664/my-original-post-about-this-lost-traction-but-long

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/serahlink/718653443540156416/help-a-homeless-artist-urgent

https://www.tumblr.com/geneslovee/716497906767708160/an-openly-gay-sakha-man-was-fined-100000-rubles

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/psychuan/716929574833995776/i-dont-like-to-do-this-but-i-need-some-help

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/ohfucccnaw/717224471637917696/0300-assistance-needed

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/entykk/716633124834066432/i-am-once-again-asking-for-your-financial

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/flamingpen18/717489106740985856/the-van-drama

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/kyanitedreamer/717553053674455040/i-hate-to-keep-posting-about-this-but-my-situation

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/moredog/726612309753085952/this-is-my-girlfriends-account-please-help-we

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/sublunaryorchid/718573876241727488/paypal

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/pikafleetsyolo/718874064787292160/buy-pikayolo-a-coffee-ko-ficompikayolo

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/pancake-loving-pandemi/719119437552304128/donate

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/the-fab-fox/718314664805744640/please-check-out-the-following-and-help-if-you

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/iron-sunrise/726992593617059840/still-p-much-stuck-at-90-so-damn-close

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/blazwura/726844656102555648/gofundme-link-httpsgofundmeb678259a

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/have-a-hygge/729823754236149760/october-3rd-808am

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/kaijuno/730076277475786753/im-freaking-out-my-rent-was-due-yesterday-and-i

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/smitemeister/730759052749160448/i-need-your-hog-wild-help

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/triple-a-artist/730202283007164416/help-me-get-a-wheelchair

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/have-a-hygge/730757622054207489/october-13th-12pm (incredibly out of money, please buy some art)

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/fuzzzilla/733356874579247104/pay-robin-mcclanahan-using-paypalme

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/encephalitisfighter/733689793429585920

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/fujoshis-arent-very-cool/733546398403936256

h ttps://www.tumblr.com/notusedanymoresorry/733644745348415488

Some have the https broken up with a space because they won’t fit in the post otherwise.

I just put the donations on this post so if my art gets around and people find this account they might help donate. Also used the art itself as a way to spread the message which proved not very effective. The nature of it still makes it a lot of posts in one which could be helpful?

Check every single one.

[fe-fictions]

I can't believe I have to post about this a second time in a year, but I have another sick kitty...

We lost our senior cat Henry in February, it was just time for him to go. He was a handsome and wonderful 14 years old, and had been with us since we were children.

And not long after we lost him, my sibling and I (we live together) decided the apartment was just too empty without him...we were missing the warmth and the joy that a sweet kitty cat brought with him.

So we each adopted our very own cats; a handsome long-haired 3 month old boy named Gojo, and a beautiful short-haired 5 month old girl named Luisa.

Luisa is my baby girl. She was born in September, the same month as me, and she's my whole world. But the last few days, she's been eating less, playing less, and getting more and more docile and lethargic.

I took her to the emergency vet today because she wasn't eating at all and was hiding since yesterday morning. He told me that she had an auto immune disorder, and was extremely anemic.

He gave me three options; try steroids and antibiotics, see if she responds to them, or they could hospitalize her and give her a blood transfusion, which was way, way too expensive...if I had the money I would've done it in a heartbeat, and it breaks my heart to think that I could've done more for her if I had a better job and could provide for my baby more. And the third option was to put her to sleep there, because her odds were slim.

I chose the option to get her medication, which was a quarter the cost of a hospitalization, and he assured me typically saw really good results, but that sometimes it would take a few days or a week or two before seeing improvement.

I gave her the first dose as soon as we got home, got her set up in my room, but she's still not eating, won't go to the bathroom, and I'm just really, really worried that I'm gonna have to say goodbye to her, before she's even a year old.

I'm just not ready to say goodbye again. Twice in the same year, two of my sweet babies. I am not ready to do that again. It happened so fast. The shelter I got her at likely had no idea she was sick; she showed no signs of it until just a few days ago. I hate that she's so fragile, and that I can't do enough for her. It's just crushing.

I want to try and focus on the positive, and hope that she's gonna pull through in the next few days. I'm just so sad, because it wasn't that long ago I saw this behavior in a dying cat. I know what it looks like, I felt it, I could see it. And I'm not ready to do that again.

I was supposed to have at least ten years with this slinky little baby. I don't want to believe that I'm gonna have to say goodbye to her. I won't know for at least a few days; but if she stops eating and she can't go to the bathroom, I don't know where to go from there.

I just wanted to vent, I wanted to let you all know that's what I'm dealing with right now. I hope you'll continue to have patience with me, and to those who commissioned art from me, I'm gonna work hard to get it done ASAP since it's already been a while, and I just need to do something to keep my mind off of what's going on right now.

But yeah. That's what's going on at this moment, and so if I sort of disappear for a little while or my posts go a while without anything, that's why.

Thanks for being so sweet, you guys are such a wonderful group of fellow FE enthusiasts and I love writing for you all. It's without a doubt the group of the friendliest and sweetest people I've ever run into; whenever awful things were going on, IRL or online, I would always come here because the drama or the stressful mess would never reach it; this place is my little safe haven haha

So thank you for being here, and thank you for listening and for your patience! I'll do everything I can to keep up.

- chiyo

[vivummortuus]

Commissions

Hello, I am opening Commissions and leaving Commissions open for the entire month. The reason for this is simply to help out with food, Kitty Supplies, and just generally to give me extra cash so I can feel a bit more secure. I do take payments through PayPal. And you get a chance to view the rough draft of your order. So you can okay it before I make the real thing. All Orders take anywhere from 2 days to complete to 7 depending on the complexity of it. If you want to tip me, cause you like my work you may do so through PayPal as well. But it is not required. Now, look below for prices and what I commission. Thank you all for taking the time to read. Also, if you don't need anything. Then can you please reblog this for me, and don't like it. Likes don't get me anywhere, unless you are liking it to remind yourself you want to commission from me. <3 <3

Base Icons 100 - $10 200 -$12 300 - $15 400 - $17 500 - $20 1,000 - $25

Icon Border Templates 1 - $2.00 2 - $3.50 3 - $4.00 [ $1 per extra Border ]

RP Promo w/ fully edited graphics 1 Panel $6.00 2 Panels $8.00 3 Panels $10.00 4 Panels $13.00

Pinned Post 1 w/ transparent background & edited $10.00 1 w/ edited background & Info panel $11.00

Dash Banners 4 including OOC, Starter Call, Shipping Call & Answered [ Fully Edited ] $10

[ Add an additional $1.50 per extra banner ]

Dash Dividers Set of 3 plain Div. $3.00 Set of 4 plain Div. $4.50 Set of 6 plain Div. $7.00

Set of 3 , fully edited, incl, gifs $5.00 Set of 4 . fully edited , incl, gifs $10.00 Set of 6 . fully edited , incl, gifs $13.50

CARRD TEMPLATES, Multi Muse [ Fully Edited w/ all info pages for each indiv Muse ]- $40.00

Single Muse [ Fully Edited w/ About, Rules, Stats, Mains and Verses pages. incl, graphic Banners, Gifs ] $30

Just the Skeleton Templates pages and Muse pages included, but no graphics, no gifs, No text, a DIY

Multi Muse $25.00 Single Muse $15.00

EXAMPLES Under the Cut

[anonymouspuzzler]

Yay Yipee I Finally Remembered I Should Update Folks On Things That Are Happening

because hey whoops as some of you might remember Supposedly I Stream Sometimes! That Uhhhh Hasn't Happened In A While Has It! so I should probably let folks know what's goin' on!! the long and the short of it is

Around late November/early December I started having issues where Discord would crash and restart anytime I tried to screenshare my capture software with my friends who I stream with. This put console game streams (so 2/3 of the games we were streaming) on the backburner till I could troubleshoot and solve that issue

On top of that it was Fucking Finals Season for me at my Graduate School so at a certain point I had to be responsible and focus on getting my final projects & essays done, which meant sacrificing stream time till my break (where I would hopefully have time to troubleshoot and then do a ton of streaming to make up for lost time)

Except THEN literally the second I went home for the holidays my hard drive abruptly and completely died. It is very possible that this contributed to the aforementioned tech issues

I was able to replace the drive and get my computer working again but because I have a Fucking Curse a lot of tech-side things were lost or started experiencing issues due to the new drive, namely A) I haven't been able to get my capture software working yet and B) whoops my entire OBS layout is just gone now I guess

This whole saga, on top of juggling other life shit and work and the like, effectively ate up my entire winter break

so tl;dr! I have a computer curse and because of it streams are gonna have to wait till I can get both OBS and my capture software working again. I'm hoping to work on that this weekend so I can be back to streaming next week, but given my school & job workload I'm guessing it'll more likely be two or three weeks. On top of that, I won't be streaming most of March due to reason of "my partner is visiting then". all of this sucks cause I want to be streaming, both for reason of "i like spending time with my good friends doing this" and "haha whoops I'm not earning money now and oh boy there sure are a lot of expenses flying at my head like rocks huh".

I've already rambled a bit more than I'd like to now so here's da main points:

Streams will (HOPEFULLY) be back in February. When they are, they'll be Monday & Tuesday nights, 5:30pst/8:30est, for as long as my friends remain available at those times (we're all adults having to look for or maintain Day Jobs so availability could change. y'all know how it is). I may also do occasional one-off streams on weekends as my energy 'n schedule permits, most likely art streams

I'll continue to be around on Holly's streams Fri/Sat/Sun as her schedule permits, because I don't have to rebuild OBS from the ground up for that

There is a 99.99% chance I'll be totally absent stream-wise during March

Even though streams are facing The Troubles I am still taking art commissions! Those haven't been affected!! You can submit an interest form here and I'll reach out to confirm prices as soon as I'm ready to start work on yours

If, out of the kindness of your heart, you would like to toss some support my way during The Troubles (which would be much appreciated; as said I've got a lot of expenses coming my way and unfortunately my day job covers my rent and nothing more), here are some other ways you can do so: -- Tip me on Ko-Fi; if you pay $9 or more you can request a doodle that I'll do for you and post on here & twitter (and might stream the process of drawing once that's up and running again). Here's an example of some Ko-Fi doodles I did previously -- You can also tip through my stream page if you want but I probably won't see those till I start streaming again. Still appreciated!!! -- I have a Throne Wishlist that's mostly stuff like kitchenware, household goods, stuff for my kitty, etc. There's also a few Fun Things though, like vinyls and a billy big bass Jay insisted I add. Either way, if you wanna contribute to something on there it means a lot. You can also suggest items to make me laugh

an' above all: thank you for reading and for bein' around!!

[seraphsfire]

New kitties update!

Hello everybody meet one of my new toddlers, Jade! I'm excited to tell you guys all about them!

She was a little shy but completely imprinted on me within the first 12 hours or so from first meeting her ;-; she has a lot of personality similarities with Xeno, she loves pets and scratches, will walk on everything, and follows me everywhere except when she is napping underneath my bed. She even sleeps next to me at night already ;-; She has no teeth bc she has like a thousand allergies and was allergic to her own tooth plaque and got sick from it so she had to have all her teeth taken out ;-; she also has dermatitis because she had fleas at one point and was allergic to the fleas and patches of her fur fell out ;-;

but i've been putting olive oil on her food and giving her plenty of hydration so after only one day her skin is already barely flaky anymore, she's itching less, and her coat feels silkier.

She's the most beautiful, sweet little goblin doll baby, her eyes are this stunning grayish-green that i've never seen in a cat before and when she's in good lighting (and holding still, which is also difficult to get her to do lol) I will take closer pictures of her.

I'm exhausted but my anxiety and depression have gone down drastically from being able to pet her, feeling her purring next to me when I sleep, and hearing her eating in the mornings.

My other child is still working on feeling comfortable in the house, he was a feral cat so I am slowly socializing him and I haven't gotten to pet him yet or look at him closely because he's been hiding under the bed. But today when I put my hand under the bed with treats in it, he ate them out of my hand and didn't run away, and has been coming into the kitchen when Jade and i are hanging out a few feet away on the couch, and actually walked up when i was sitting down just now to look at me, so he's making huge progress after only a day for a kitty that was so terrified of everything that they actually put him on anxiety medication skdfsdhgdhg

He's so beautiful too, he's a cream point medium haired siamese mix, he's huge and a similar width to Xeno but has a more angular face and is a lot Longer (almost twice the size of Jade lol). I named him Sunfyre after a GoT dragon because he does look fiery and kind of like a dragon too, and so I can call him Sunny for short.

I was so worried because I wasn't able to separate them at all since my bed is huge and Sunny wouldn't come out, and they did yowl and fight a little bit with each other last night but actually otherwise they're not aggressive or fearful of each other at all and will walk by each other calmly as long as they have at least a foot and a half of space. I've been telling Jade she can't be mean to her new roommate and has to give him space because it's his house too lol.

I miss xeno so much and it does still feel like i'm babysitting somebody else's kitties but I can't wait to give them a happy, calm, and loving space to live in.

One of you donated $20 that really helped a lot, and I have a commission too! I am still taking commissions, please let me know your budget and I'll tell you what kind of art piece I can do for the amount! I'm open to almost anything. Thank you guys for all your financial support, I would not have been able to afford them otherwise so soon after all of Xeno's medical bills. I wasn't planning on getting more kitties so soon but I just saw their little faces and I knew they needed me even though my heart is still broken.

Also of course battling extreme exhaustion just from everything this past month really, the new babies have been keeping me up because I'm trying to do things periodically so they acclimate well. You guys can still donate if you want but you have been so generous so I don't want to keep clogging up ppls dashes with desperate donation posts if it's not an immediate emergency. I would much rather do a commission for you! I can work with any budget, even a few dollars ^^

I'm working on two larger pieces right now so it will be a few weeks for something big but I could get a few doodles for smaller budgets done soon-ish if that is something you're interested in!

You can pray/ send good thoughts and energy that I will get a job soon so I can give them a good life, and that their conjunctivitis from being in the shelter will clear up soon without having to traumatize them with a vet visit so soon after getting them used to so many new scary things.

Anyway, thank you. Love you all. One day if i ever get enough $ i really do hope to pay back your generosity, it's really helped me believe in the goodness of strangers again. and just mentally that is something that has been such a huge thing to experience after all the trauma and death i've been dealing with for like 4 years now.

For now I hope paying you back in kitty pictures will do!

[tyrannosaurusrexxi]

⚠️Emergency Commissions⚠️

Hello guys! How's it going? Currently I'm opening emergency commisions which is something I haven't done really ever before. My job was destroyed by a natrual disaster (yay 2024) and I'll be out of work until around mid February. Along side that I had to say goodby to my Kitty of 19 years and to be honest with you it was not cheap at all so I'm in a bit of a struggling position.

What are you offering?

I am offering Icon comissons at the moment! These can be of OCs, you, comfort characters, or even fanart!

What are the rules?

No NSFW

No over the top gore (a little blood is alright)

I can draw Mech so happy for any Transformer ocs or robotic characters! There will be a $5 up surge however.

I don't have much experience with drawing furries but am Happy to draw them because everytime I have I've had a lot of fun! Besides furry designs are always *chef's kiss!*

I will not draw anything inappropriate.

No extra characters! As this is an icon only one character per peice!

I have every right to refuse a request.

I have every right to post the artwork on my social media or use in advertising in my commisions.

No commerical use! I do not concent for you to sell my peice on prints or so on. (But feel free is selling a character to include the art work!^^)

What are the prices?

The prices are rather simple!

$30USD

However, like stated above if the character is a mecha or mech character (robotic, such as a transformer) there will be a $5USD ser charge.

Slots available?

If I sell out and you are still interested or you miss being in the first five do not worry! I will give you the option to be first in line once a slot opens up!^^

Closed

Open

Open

Open

Open

How does the process work?

The process is nice and simple! I promise you that!^^

Send me a DM on Tumblr! I will repsond asap!

Send me who you want drawn, and if you have a specific idea/prop in mind tell me!

I will send the sketch when it is ready and wait for approval. I will keep sending sketch updates until I get your full approval! (Incase there are changes you want)

Once I have your approval I will send my PayPal link. I will not finish the peice until I am paid.

Once it's done I will send them to you here on Tumblr as well as Email (email is optional)

How long do they normall take?

Normally a peice can take anywhere from 3 days to a week! Just depends how fast our communication and approval take! But I will be upfront with you, letting you know when I will finish it!

Any examples?

[denimbex1986]

'It’s perplexing. Who thought that it would be a good idea to pair the premieres of the films, Oppenheimer with Barbie? Ultraviolence (I am become the God of Death — Bim-Bam-Boom!) and Ultrasex (in the guise of some toy’s anatomical incorrectness being solved by Margot Robbie’s Babylonian generosities). Do we need another sign that it’s over for human civilization? That the twin allures of Das Kapital have finally found a way to make us munch popcorn and weep to Oppie’s loss of national security status because he once had pinko ties, and that Robbie has bravely taken pink Barbie out of anorexia nervosa and hangs out with the horns of plenty now. Why no GI Joe, sporting a new 3D printer dick, included in the flick for Margot to bivouac with?

That’s the mainstream for you. They’ve totally bought into the America yin-and-yang, sex and death, just as Freud feared in Civilization and Discontents. Popcorning to a nuke movie. How about that! We just can’t take anything seriously any more, can we?

Pssst. What? Not anatomically corrected? Then why would you go to that movie? Is it a nod of homage to the non-binary orientalists? Is it some kind of an AI inside joke? A fist-up stand of solidarity for poor old Alan Turing and the Singularity ahead? Or is it just omnipotence versus impotence? What a double bill.

Naturally, what’s left of the Left have been wringing their hands, and playing old Dylan tunes again, in disgust at how wrong Hollywood got it. Oppenheimer should represent an important ‘teaching moment,’ as they say, for those of us who have a tendency to forget, and look at Jewish friends with bewilderment when they say, “Never again.” Whaddya mean, Isaac? we go. And they schlep off, muttering at the wall.

I watched Oppenheimer yesterday. The story has been told a number of times now. This particular version, directed by Christopher Nolan (Interstellar, Inception), is based upon the 2006 Pulitzer Prize-winning biography American Prometheus by Kai Bird and Martin Sherwin. It stars Cillan Murphy as J. Robert Oppenheimer; Emily Blunt as Kitty Oppenheimer; Florence Pugh as Jean Tatlock; Matt Damon as General Leslie Groves; Robert Downey as Lewis Strauss; Tom Conti as Albert Einstein; Kenneth Branaugh as Niels Bohr; Jason Clarke as Roger Robb; and, Matthias Schweighöfer as Werner Heisenberger. It’s a stellar cast for the Blast from the past (although it might have benefitted from casting the late great Philip Seymour Hoffman as General Grove). It’s an epic biographical thriller; but it’s too vanilla, and I feel that all that hellfire and angst(roms) should have broken my heart in twain for the last time. But, as Peggy Lee might have sang “Is That All There Is To An Atom Bomb Blast?”

Oppenheimer follows the Bird/Sherwin delineation and begins at the end of his career. In December 1953, the Atomic Energy Commission had suspended Oppenheimer’s security clearance, and a few weeks later revoked it, fearing that, although he could be regarded as a loyal American citizen, his past affiliations with communists, as well as his post-Hiroshima speeches regarding the need to control nuclear proliferation through UN measures, roiled rightwing militarists and political fascists, such as Senator Joseph McCarthy — and president Harry Truman, who referred to him as a “crybaby.” Their decision was influenced by an FBI report that stated that “more probably than not J. Robert Oppenheimer is an agent of the Soviet Union.” The three-hour film attempts to honor Oppie’s request to weigh his existential being in the totality of his life, rather than with reactionary jibes and jingoism.

The AEC move meant Oppenheimer could not work or know about future nuclear weapons projects, but more importantly the widely-publicized rebuke to his legacy as the Father of the Atomic Bomb left his name blackened and his mood blue. The full frontal assault led by Washington lawyer Roger Robb, known for his “ferocious cross-examination” technique, and played typecastically by Jason Clarke, who had us believin’ in torture from his role in Zero Dark Thirty. As the authors of American Prometheus put it:

In assaulting his politics and his professional judgments—his life and his values really—Oppenheimer’s critics in 1954 exposed many aspects of his character: his ambitions and insecurities, his brilliance and naïveté, his determination and fearfulness, his stoicism and his bewilderment.

This deeply contradictory and, yet, serene and highly literate Oppie is what director Christopher Nolan tries to capture in the film. Recently, Cillan Murphy summed up Oppie and how he approached the role of playing the enigma, whose rationale for continuing to develop the Bomb was the counter-intuitive notion that it would make war obsolete: “I do think that he believed it would be the weapon to end all wars,” Murphy recently told NME. “He thought that [having the bomb] would motivate countries to form a sort of nuclear world governance. He was naive.” Indeed, the United Nations has proven futile to stop the dominators amongst nation-states from nuclear proliferation. In the film, in a scene just following the successful explosion of the atom bomb (that’ll end all war), Oppie is talking with Edward Teller, when the former says he hopes that the message sent is that ‘all war is now unthinkable,’ but Teller immediately responds that, yes, maybe, ‘until a bigger bomb comes along’. Teller would go on to become The Father of the Hydrogen Bomb, a super fusion bomb 1000 times more powerful than the one dropped on Hiroshima.

Unfortunately, for my enjoyment of the movie, I’d read other accounts of the relationship between Teller and Oppenheimer. Daniel Ellsberg, for instance, who wrote in his last book before he died, The Doomsday Machine: Confessions of a Nuclear War Planner — the book he says he wished he’d been able to get out before the Pentagon Papers — that when he came out of seeing Dr. Strangelove with a buddy they were convinced they’d just watched “a documentary,” and writes Ellsberg, “Teller was, along with Kahn, Henry Kissinger, and the former Nazi missile designer Wernher von Braun, one of Kubrick’s inspirations for the character of Dr. Strangelove, who wore, uncomfortably, the Glove that Vice President Dick Cheney would find the need to take off, but who was entirely self-satisfied with in the end. We got very little of this tension, or frisson, if you will, in the film. Director Nolan goes with “naive,” thereby painting all lefty rhetoric since the Double-Tap on Japan as ignorance of realpolitik.

A major question at the time of the development of the Bomb at Los Alamos was the actual urgency of its need. It has been presumed by politicians and military figures, and fed to the public for consumption, over the decades that the Bomb Chase was to get there before the Nazis did; that the prospect was real that if the Germans developed and used the device first it could have taken out the British and the Russians, ending the war a different way and leaving the world with the prospect of rule by super-fascists. Certainly the V2 rockets, already devastating London, were seen as a more terrifying delivery system for any super bomb.

In The Doomsday Machine, Ellsberg actually paints a different picture and suggests that he opposed its immediate development, in part, due to the safety concerns that were being reflected in droll bets being made before the test of Trinity. In June 1942, Ellsberg writes, Albert Speer and Hitler were discussing the feasibility of the Bomb and whether it could done safely:

Actually, Professor Heisenberg had not given any final answer to my question whether a successful nuclear fission could be kept under control with absolute certainty or might continue as a chain reaction. Hitler was plainly not delighted with the possibility that the earth under his rule be transformed into a glowing star. [Following this discussion, Speer reported,] “on the suggestion of the nuclear physicists we scuttled the project to develop an atom bomb … after I had again queried them about deadlines and been told that we could not count on anything for three or four years.”

Essentially, Ellsberg writes, Hitler saw no urgency, while the US and Oppenheimer forged on with the WMD.

In Heisenberg’s War, author Thomas Powers, discusses the Myth of the German Bomb, and ponders why the project fizzled despite the genius of Werner Heisenberg. In June 1942, would-be Vater of Der Fuhrer Bomb deflated some Nazi bagpipes when discussing a bomb’s likelihood. Powers writes:

If we want to know why there was no German bomb, nor even any serious program to build one, we must decide why Heisenberg gave this advice…Was Heisenberg’s advice no more, no less, than his considered opinion, honestly given in the hope of sparing Germany an expensive technical folly? Or did Heisenberg deliberately take advantage of the moment, his prestige, and the uncertainties of an untried science to prick the balloon of official hopes?

Oppenheimer had met Heisenberg and Teller had taken his doctorate in physics under him. Hmm.

Oppenheimer fails on another front miserably and, now, loudly. Nolan chose to enact the famous Oppie quote from the Bhagavad-Gita in a way that the writers of American Prometheus probably would have found misleading, let’s say, and which, some Hindus were said to be deeply offended by. The quote we have heard over and over from Oppie-mism is: “I am become Death, Destroyer of worlds.” Nice sound byte. But it is a quote from The Song of God, which, in American Prometheus, Oppenheimer describes as “the most beautiful philosophical song existing in any known tongue.” But, in Nolan’s film, Oppie, while screwing Jean Tatlock, his then girlfriend, an aspiring psychiatrist, is forced to read (in translation) the stanza embedding the quote directly, while she rides his meat pony to heaven like Belle Starr and he constellates her firmament with, um, time-stars...Hmph.

Nolan might have explored Oppenheimer’s deeper inner mythopoesis not only by more fully contextualizing “the most beautiful philosophical song,” and showing how it applies to the problem at hand. He was also digging on John Donne. I’ve been there, done that; I understand how that can happen. Oppie was drawn to the Holy Sonnets, to the Trinity (he named his Bomb project after it), and, in particular, the “Batter My Heart” one, which I just love to death. It goes on about the hopelessness of being a sinner and the need to be ravished and bodily owned by the Lord; in short, it advocates consensual moral rape. Nolan’s having none of that. In American Prometheus, we find out that Oppenheimer had read TS Eliot’s “The Wasteland,” too. And while Oppie is shown briefly reading it in the film, it gets no further fob; it’s just a gesture to the more literate in the cinema crowd, who might go, dig it, man. I hate lilacs, too, man. Hell, the authors of America Prometheus even describe how Eliot came to Princeton on a short term fellowship at Oppie’s behest, during which the poet wrote The Cocktail Party (“the worst thing he ever wrote,” opines Oppie, in the book) and avoided such faculty parties while at Princeton. Nope. Too highbrow to explore. Welcome to messy Democracy and its Discontents.

Oppenheimer was nominated for the Nobel Prize for physics three times, in 1946, 1951 and 1967. He was never awarded the prize, but many physicists believe that he should have been. Oppenheimer’s work on atoms was groundbreaking. He was one of the first scientists to understand the nature of positrons, and he made significant contributions to the development of quantum mechanics. His work on black holes was also highly influential. In 1939, he and his student Hartland Snyder published a paper that laid out the basic properties of black holes. This paper was one of the first to describe how a star could collapse under its own gravity to form a black hole. I Am Become Death Twice.

Preceding Oppenheimer’s release by just a couple of weeks was another Oppenheimer film (documentary) that appeared on NBC, To End All War: Oppenheimer & the Atomic Bomb. The PBS Ken Burns-ish feel doesn’t have the manipulative soundtrack, or the wonder-filled moment at how They pulled off that Bomb explosion on film without CGI, or the titty sexual romps of Oppie riding two women (tragic as a molecule fissioning), or the play to the plebs for entertainment rather than factuality. But To End All War does have a nice compact story that unfurls over a mere 83 minutes. And everybody plays themselves. Including, surprise, surprise, Christopher Nolan, brought in to talk Oppie. And I would recommend that shorter doco over the epic tragedy of the Left’s demise.

The Barbieheimer phenomenon is bizarre, as already duly noted. Now I ‘ve just read that Oppenheimer star Cillan Murphy has announced his willingness to be a Ken in the next Barbie movie. More Big Bang for the Buck. Ee-haaa! And what sacred text will he despoil in that one?!'

[katzkinder]

Day 8: Melancholy/THANK YOU!

I ended up joining Servamp fandom here on tumblr about... Four years ago now? In 2018, right after moving to a different state and leaving everything I knew behind. I found the anime by complete chance while browsing the Josei tag, and now... Here I am!!

I don’t know where I would be right now without this fandom, I really, truly, don’t. I’ve met so many wonderful, kind, amazing people through this series, rediscovered my love of creation, and made tons of friends!

To everyone who’s been with me on this journey... THANK YOU!

First up, @hello-vampire-kitty thank you for your hard work translating the chapters! I really appreciate the translation notes you add, and how clearly important it is to you to treat this series with the love the English localization won’t /hj

@xchibikai thank you for providing the RAWs! You’ve been doing it for so long, and without you and Kitty, we’d all be totally lost! Not to mention your Tsukimitsu sib art always makes me feel so warm and fuzzy; it’s so cute!

@servamp-announcements Even though you just started, I’m already so grateful! The formatting on posts is really easy to read, and the blog theme is also very easy to navigate! I especially appreciate that you provide sources and links back to the original announcements 🥰

@ryotakun-translations it looks like I can’t tag you, but I still wanted to give my thanks! Commissioning translations from you is always so easy and pleasant, and I know I’m getting quality work when I do.

@kalu-chan Thank you for uploading the interactions from Final Servamp Quest, and the translation for both the White Day routes and Gear of Night Trick! Your doc was super easy to navigate, and it must have taken a long time.

@rubyleaf We haven’t really ever talked before, but I still wanted to take a moment to say thanks!! Your fanfic Guilty Pleasure Friends is AMAZING, and I really admire the dedication it takes to keep updating something like that for so long. I love reading it during long car rides, and the cafe scene to this day brings me so much joy

@crazyanime3 I’ve been taking excellent care of the boys you sent me... Was it already two years ago?? Thank you for helping me start my collection way back when! I still have the little message and doodle you sent along with the buttons, saved somewhere safe

@snowlilys-wife @cottoncanada @shinychxndelure Thank you for being so supportive and accepting! I love talking with you all and hashing out scenarios and headcanons is always really fun! Also, y’all are funny af

@mahi-does-some-art @pomfry @hisakata-resutomoshibi @yarrayora @haru-jje @unwelcomedfox  @revoleotion @xthunderbolt @madburnishes @tipzycat y’all some talented and also incredibly sweet motherfuckers, holy shit. I’m so, so glad I met all of you.

@joydoesathing your genderbend designs are always so creative and I love so, so many of them! I think my favorites are Gil and Hugh. I also love your Virtues au a lot, too! Your eye for character design is incredible, and then you do all that in pen on top of it? Amazing!!

@chayam-chi Your art is so cute! You’re such a sweet person, and so funny, too! I always look forward to seeing you on my dash, and I look forward to seeing where you go from here!!

@danozi1 Your sense of humor and the creepy cuteness of your works always scratch a very specific itch for me, and also you have Good Taste

@mystivio @meiwaku-san Your panel colorings are so good and always leave me floored. Like, coloring goals, full on.

@random-husky I’ve super duper enjoyed everything you’ve posted this week, from your ideas to your compositions, you’re so creative!!

@kiwitheweebartist you’re getting better and better every day! Your little commentary posts and random thoughts are all very cute and it makes me smile whenever I read one.

@kchk-55 @d01110010rr You’re so young, but already so talented?? I’m amazed! I hope good things find you both going forward, and that school and life in general is easy on you. If anyone is mean to y’all, I’ll beat them up!!

@jutsuzuban MIKEY. YOU. I love you!!

@niccodoesart Sushi! I love the way you color; you’re so good with markers! The way you draw feet is so cute ❤

@faith-gigliorosa Your edits are so cool, holy shit. I always look forward to them! Ballad of the mona lisa is still one of my favorites.

@blackrose4242564 @theartcat2 @maria-the-mage @wingedpaperpeachpurse @radioactivesweet @fgfhfhfhf @ourelenabespalovafan @ezuja-deatro @ninjagirl142 @pause143 I see you guys in my notes for practically everything I post and thank you so much for your support!!!

@bluemoonfantasiesiii there’s a lot of things I could say to you and about you. There’s a lot of things I want to express. There’s a lot of moments and talks that I hold dear to my heart, but I think the best way to sum up my feelings towards you, is this... ......... >:3c

... That was a lot of people, huh. |D Sorry if I annoyed anyone with this, but I just... Wanted to express my sincere gratitude to each and every one of you. I’m a better, happier person for each person I’ve met here, and I’ve never quite had this kind of experience within a fandom before. I’m glad Servamp was the first time I held my hand out within an online community to quite this degree, and thank you to every single person who reached back.

A very merry, very belated, HAPPY 10TH ANNIVERSARY to you all!

[shadow-is-here-and-queer]

Hi. I'm Shadow and I'm just kind of.. vibing here with TOO MANY AUS

I'm agender.

18+ years old (I don't want my exact age on here, only my friends know. Mainly because I'm scared of being judged-)

I go by she/her and they/them

I am aroace spec

My other tumblrs:

@leaf-and-crow-au -Warrior Cat AU

I have a... new au lol. @mike-n-kitty-blog

An rp blog?? CORRECT! Minors, dni from this blog @spiderturtle-arachne

I have Commissions! {Link for the post}

A fic for my oc Arachne! Fic Link

I am working on an AU-ish fanfic! My first ever one!

{The Missing Piece} [Discontinued]

My RoTTMNT Au

This post has the link to it and explains what is like. Up with my writing lol.

I have a new au/fic/comic thing I am not sure what it is going to be uhhh-

Family Made of Shattered Glass

It's just an oc insert-

"When a young turtle learns that those four teens that keep stopping her mother's plans are actually her brothers, things get complicated"

Fic Link

[uwuwriting]

Todoroki, Shinsou and Iida protecting you

Request: Hello can I request todo, shinsou and iida protecting their girlfriend from cat callers or something like that? Basically her being in a really uncomfortable situation and even though she is a fearless hero in the field because of past trauma she freezes up in these situations? Thank you - anonymous

This post might trigger some people since they might have experienced something similar both in the cat calling and past trauma department. I’ve never really written anything so serious and triggering before so this might suck. I’m sorry in advance. So TW beware. Love yaa.💖💖💖

rules

warnings: trauma, PTSD, semi non-con but not explicit, cat-calling, harassment, ends in fluff

Todoroki Shouto

-Shouto is really protective of you. 

-Not an overbearing type of protective, he just wants you to be safe and sound. 

-Also he knew about your abusive past.

-When he shared his family background you shared your own trauma and history with physical abuse. 

-It hurt him to hear you saying that someone you trusted, someone who used to be in his place, betrayed you like that. 

-If he could find your ex and beat him to a plump because of how he scarred you, he would. 

-But you reassured him that you were alright now, that he showed you what being loved felt like even though he himself didn’t really know how to love and that your past is what pushed you to be a hero. 

-Your relationship lasted even after high school and now, one year into the adult world, you two lived together. 

-It had been a tough day for your boyfriend at work, having to fight three major villain attacks and a mountain of paper work to tackle. 

-Fighting along side you was the highlight of his day. 

-He was the first to arrive at your apartment and had gotten to preparing dinner for you when his phone rang. 

-You smiled back at him from the screen as he accepted the call. 

- “Hey, love. I making so-”

- “Sho someone is following me.”

-He heard the panic in your voice and immediately turned off the stove walking to the door to put on his shoes. 

- “Y/N where are you?”

-You gave him your location and he was out the door in no time. 

-He kept you on the phone, talking to you, trying to restrain your panic. 

- “H-he was outside of the pharmacy near the a-agency.” 

-You never stuttered, oh god he was going to kill the man. 

- “I walked past him and he grabbed my arm a-and pushed me on the w-wall. Shouto he tried to t-touch me.”

-He was running now, his rage making his quirk go crazy as flames rose from his left shoulder. 

- “Baby I’m almost there, go into the convenience store on the corner and wait in there.”

-Your weak okay from the other line pushed him further. 

-He knew how certain acts reminded you of your ex, even after all these years. 

-They would send you into a small panic and even though you were one of the top upcoming heroes , you were still human at the end of the day your own past haunting you. 

-He was always there to chase those fears and memories away, never letting them get to close to you. 

-And now that’s exactly what he has set out to do; chase away the man who tried to hurt you. 

-Rounding the corner he was met with a sight he wished to never ever witness again. 

-It seems that you hadn’t made it into the store when he hang up and he slapped himself for not keeping you on the call for longer. 

-He heard your sobs as the man had you pinned to the wall his hand trying to unzip your jeans. 

-Shouto was fuming. 

-Without a second thought he grabbed the man by his jacket and shoved him to the ground, grabbing your elbows to steady you before pushing you gently behind him as the man stood up. 

- “Want a taste of her too boy?”

- “Get the fuck away from her!”

-Shouto kept one of his arms behind him pressing you onto his back as the other activated his quirk frost forming from his elbow to his palm. 

-He could feel your trembling as you clutched onto his shirt, on of your hands grasping his own squeezing it. 

-The man backed away at the sight of Shouto’s ice raising his hands in the air admitting defeat. 

-Shouto however had other plans. 

-Freezing the man on the spot he growled as he fished his phone out of his pocket and called the police reporting what the man had done and his location.

- “If I ever see you again anywhere near her I’m not going to be this kind got it?”

-And with that you two left as the police sirens sounded in the distance. 

-Back in your apartment, Shouto helped you get undressed and then ran you a bath, wiping away the man’s touch and leaving small kisses were his hands used to be. 

-He helped you get dressed in one of his hoodies and a loose pair of sweatpants before setting you down on the couch and ordering your favorite food.

-He heard your small sniffles and sat down beside you, bringing you on his lap and letting you cry it out, rocking you back and forth as he kisses your hair.

-You calm down after some time but Shouto won’t let you leave his embrace.

- “I won’t let anyone else hurt you ever again. I don’t care where I am you will always call me when something happens. I love you.”

-For the next month or so Shouto was at your beck and call, never leaving your side and even going as far to take some days off to spend as much time with you as possible.

-He kept his promise as he kept you safe for the rest of your lives. 

Shinsou Hitoshi

-Hitoshi was there for you when he found out about how one of you family members had hurt you. 

-He was there when you would wake up with nightmares while sleeping in his dorm. 

-Or when you had panic attacks after someone came at you in a way that seemed all too familiar. 

-He was there every step of the way. 

-Hitoshi was really amazed at how you zoned in on your work and those thoughts never held you back. 

-PTSD was hard to battle and even harder to deal with in a work place such as yours. 

-After high school your panic attacks fell in numbers, leaving you to rest peacefully at night.

-Shinsou was sure he had chased your demons away, that you felt completely safe with him and that he would never see your trembles of fear ever again.

-But he was wrong. 

-You two were out on a date, walking along the beach on a sunny day enjoying each others company. 

-Shinsou went to buy you two ice cream leaving you to wait for him on a bench.

-You were minding your business, checking up with your agency to make sure everything is alright; after all it’s not everyday that your main two heroes are out of commission for the day. 

- “Damn girl where’d ya get all that ass!”

-It came from a group of man behind you who were staring at you like a piece of meat.

-You tried to ignore them switching to your messages ready to text Hitoshi.

- “Those shorts look so tight on you sweetheart.”

- “I bet it’s not the only thing that’s tight about her.”

-You had frozen up at the nickname.

-It brought back everything you and Shinsou had managed to scare off, pushing them down your throat making your insides twist in disgust. 

 -He isn’t here it’s just some awful cat callers, Y/N calm down. 

-You tried to calm yourself down using your common sense, separating the two situations and pointing out the differences, a  technique Shinsou had taught you while you were still in high school.

-You were so lost in thought you hadn’t noticed the three men hovering over you, one of them reaching down to grasp your thigh. 

-That’s when you started to tremble.

- “Aw look at her, she’s so excited..”

- “Let’s go have some fun pretty girl.”

- “We’ll make you feel so good you won’t be able to walk home.”

-You shoved the man’s hand away and went to get up only for an arm to snake around your waist  pulling you back down on the bench. 

- “Now now sweetheart don’t be naughty.”

-You wanted Hitoshi. 

-You wanted your Hitoshi so bad right now.

-And as if you had summoned him, purple hair could be seen above the men’s heads. 

-Shoving them off of you one more time you pushed through hitting Shinsou’s chest as he wrapped an arm around you. 

-He pushed you behind his back before scanning the three men, leveling them with a glare so sharp it could slice right through them. 

- “You better leave my girl alone before I get really angry.”

-The men scrambled to their feet before running off, terrified from Hitoshi’s structure. 

- “Kitten! Kitten are you alright? Did they hurt you? Please kitty talk to me.”

-Tears ran down your cheeks and Shisnou just pulled you gently into his chest before telling you that he was taking you home.

-This man will do everything in the house after that. 

-He undresses you and helps into the shower to clear their touch from your skin, then he dresses you in one of his large hoodies and lays you on the couch. 

-He can see you are still trembling so he comes back and takes you into his arms before going back to doing whatever he had in mind. 

-Now this is a scene to behold. 

-Two of Japan’s strongest heroes are walking around their house cosplaying a panda and its bamboo stick. 

 -He orders take out and then lays on the couch, still having you on his lap drowning your sobs in his chest as he says over and over again how sorry he is for leaving you alone and how much he loves you. 

-He knows you haven’t had an episode in what felt like ages. 

-It really shook him seeing you so helpless and terrified again. 

-He swore he would never see that petrified glint in your eyes. 

-That was his new mission. 

-And he was willing to do anything to accomplish it. 

Iida Tenya 

-Iida is well aware about how your ex had forced you to do certain things with him. 

-He also knew how you believed that what had happened had been your fault. 

-He had reassured you that nothing was your fault,that your ex was to blame and to never see yourself other than the victim in this situation. 

-It hurt him to see you suffer so much. 

-He had provided you with a shoulder to cry on and soon enough you two were together.

-When during your last year of high school, his comfort and words didn’t really cut it he encouraged you to see a therapist. 

-And that helped you a lot. 

-It untangled the parts Iida couldn’t reach on his own and coupled with his support you managed to pull yourself fully out of the whole that your ex had dug. 

-Now Iida knew that somethings still triggered you. 

-He knew what he should and shouldn’t do while you two are being intimate and what he should watch out for. 

-So when you two are taking the train to visit Deku in his agency for his birthday and he feels you squeezed his hand a little too hard he knew something was up. 

-You had buried you face in his shoulder, something he wouldn’t allow if you had asked, squeezing his hand as your breathing became uneven. 

-Iida looked around expecting to see your ex somewhere thinking that he was the reason for your small attack. 

-But he found no one he knew in the crowd. 

-Then his eyes fell back down to you and from the corner of his eye he caught movement under your dress. 

-Following the source of the movement with his eyes he was met with the lustful eyes of a grown ass man, his hand under your skirt groping and squeezing you. 

-He saw his hand trying to separate your thighs and that’s when he fully snapped. 

-Grabbing the man’s hand he shoved it in his chest before placing himself between you and him. 

- “How dare you touch her like that? You should be ashamed of yourself!!”

-The whole train was looking at the man at this point and Iida could see how the vein on his forehead popped. 

- “Being an adult, you should know better.”

-Others chimed in insulting and shaming the man while others asked you if you were alright. 

-At the next stop the person got off a chain of angry comments following him out. 

- “Y/N honey are you alright?”

-You buried your face in his chest and he let you stay there for the rest of the ride. 

-He placed on hand on your back rubbing soft circles over your sweater and talking to you not allowing your thoughts/memories to creep further into your mind. 

-He kept your hand in his for as long as you were away from your apartment. 

-You would squeeze his hand every now and then, grounding yourself. 

-Once at home late that evening he pampered you. 

-He ran you a bubble bath and cooked your favorite food. 

-He made a small pillow fort on your couch while you were in the bath and he waited for you to finish. 

-The rest of your day and night was spent in your boyfriend’s arms never letting you go once. 

-He provided his warmth and comfort. 

-Just like when you were in high  school.

TAG TEAM AY:

@iwaqchan​ @the-arcana-fan-fic​ @angelwritings​ @axerrri​ @reinyrei​

[prettylittlebutterflie]

It All Started With A Break

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31840603

Okay, so I have fallen down the rabbit hole known as MariBat and I just can't stop all the ideas I have because of this and decided that enough is enough and I am doing it.

This is my very first fanfic - or any fic actually - but I hope you guys like it and be WARNED that some of you may find some part of this story that's similar with another and that may've been because I really liked the idea when I read it and wanna have a kinda similar thing here and the same goes with some trope of this fanfic in the future, but I'll do my best to keep it unique. I am also new to the DCU, but I'm doing research and planning to binge watch stuff and if you could please help this poor soul find a way to navigate and somehow get an idea on how that universe work (especially abt the batfam), I'll be forever grateful to thy savior.

This fic is canon until S4 Ep 1&2 (Truth & Lie) of MLU and as for the rest, I'll let you guys know.

So yeah, that's all. Enjoy and hope you guys like it. (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

P.S. Sorry I kinda ranted, this is my first time actually posting smth so bear with me people

SYNOPSIS

It’s been four years ever since Hawkmoth, who now goes by the name Shadow Moth, began his reign of terror in Paris. Four years worth of akumas that have brought pain and suffering. Four years of no rest in controlling their emotions, afraid of what may come if they were controlled.

After four long years, the Miraculous Team can finally see a ray of light. Everything they have sacrificed for that one goal they all share is finally going to be repaid… Not.

Locating Hawkmoth was easier said than done, and the frustration is finally getting to them. With that, it was decided that they need a break from their hero lives — ok, maybe not. After all, Shadow Moth is proving himself to be a workaholic (like dude, don’t you have anything better to do than destroy everyone’s schedule?) — but anyways, it was clear. THEY. NEED. A. BREAK. Away from Paris. Away from Hawkmoth. Away from the frickin akumas.

So yeah, that’s how it was decided (more like forced) that they are going to America to relax, let loose, and have some fun. After all, who knows, maybe a break is all they need to get things to start getting better — or worse.

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PROLOGUE

“Alright. So, we are going to take a break—”

“For two months.”

“For two months. And because it’s supposed to be a break, that means—”

“No thinking of anything Moth related.”

“No thinking of anything Moth rela— Moth related?”

“You know, Hawkmoth, Red Moth, Shadow Moth, those Moths.”

“Right. Moths. Aside from Moths, it also means—’

“No thinking of akumas.”

“No thinking of akumas. For this entire break, we’re not going to think about—”

“Anything Miraculous related.”

“Anything Miraculous related. Alya, do you really need to do that every time I’m about to say it?”

“It’s because she knows you. We know you. It’s ridiculous, utterly ridiculous, how you always promise not to worry about something, especially anything Miraculous related, just to break it the moment anything related to it comes up. So, yes. She needs to say it and repeat it as much as possible for it to go through that head of yours.”

“Guys, I swear, I’m really going to follow through with this plan. I did agree that we need to unwind ourselves since we’re getting way too stressed and that won’t help us focus on our job.”

“Only after we bugged you about it. Get it? Bugged. Pfft—”

“Hey! Puns are my thing. And you shouldn’t be saying it like that. You’re making it ape-solutely obvious and that makes it not punny anymore”

“Dude, do you really have to do that? That’s so not paw-some. Pfft—”

“All puns aside, it is true that we had to convince you, Mari-hime, to agree on taking a break. Although I rarely take a break from fencing, my Mother and I are aware of the importance of having one and may I also remind you that you were the one who taught us that.”

“And that’s why I told you guys to go have one.”

“But you plus the kitty are the ones who need it the most. Remember what future-me said? About you two always leading us and how she— or rather I am the last one called upon? That means you guys are always gonna work while the rest of us may or may not be needed in some fights.”

“There is a 97.6% probability of you two showing up in fights.”

“Because we have to. It’s our responsibility as the one leading our team.”

“M’lady’s right. Besides, there were only the two of us in the beginning and with all the akumas, we just got used to it.”

“But that doesn’t mean you don’t need to rest. The music I’m hearing from both of you is filled with the stress you guys have and it doesn’t sound nice. Maybe you two unwinding will help make it more beautiful and even more powerful than before.”

“Fine. We’re all taking a break—”

“Especially you and Adrien.”

“Especially Adrien and I, for a month. Now, does anyone have any ideas on how we're gonna do that?”

“Ooh! Me, me! I have a competition coming up this summer break so I can’t really go anywhere too far since I have some training to do.”

“I’m sticking with the ape. Gotta keep an eye on him if I don’t want him messing up with the timeline. Plus, it’ll be pretty fun beating him up every time he asks for a challenge.”

“Hey!”

“The same goes for me. Someone has to make sure the correct time is recorded with not a single millisecond of it missed. Kwami knows how many times he messes it up whenever he does the recording himself.”

“Okay. So Kim, Alix, and Max will be staying in Paris. Are you guys sure that you’ll be able to take a break even if you’re in the city?”

“Yeah, we're fine. And I am totally beating you next time, little bunny.”

“Whatever. There’s nothing wrong with dreaming, y’know.”

“Anything else?”

“Oh, I have an internship in America this coming summer. The one at the Daily Planet. I just got the email and I was finally given an invite!”

“Really? Cool! Told you you’ll get it, babe!”

“Yeah! That’s really awesome, Alya! So I’m assuming you'll be accepting that?”

“You got it, girl! I mean, this is the Daily Planet we’re talkin’ about. I’ll learn so much about writing and journalism there, I’ve just got to take it.”

“So Alya’s going to America. Anyone else with plans outside of the country?”

“There will be an upcoming world-class fencing competition this summer and Mother and I have discussed my participation in it. It will be held in the States as well, specifically Gotham, two weeks before the end of the summer break. Maybe you should participate in it as well, Adrien. That way, you’ll have an excuse for your father to leave the country. I’m sure Mother will be happy to convince him as well to let you participate in it. That way, at the very least, I’ll have someone I know who’ll be an actual challenge.”

“Really? That actually sounds great! I’m sure Father would agree if your mother’s the one who suggested it. Thanks Kagami!”

“Okay. Kagami and hopefully Adrien will have a fencing competition in America too.”

“My Dad is having a tour in America right now. He’ll be having the last one at Metropolis during the summer break. He actually wants me to go with him, but I declined. It’ll be great if we all could go there and see it.”

“Dude, that’s so cool! Maybe you’ll even get to perform with your dad on stage. You did make that song with him that reached the record chart’s top. I’ve even made a playlist based on it.”

“Okay then, that makes Alya, Kagami, Adrien, and Luka going to the States. Chloe, do you also have plans to go there this summer? Maman said your mother was thinking of inviting you to be one of the models in an upcoming fashion show there.”

“She did mention something like that, but I wasn’t really paying attention to details once I found out that it’ll be outside of Paris. I’ll discuss it with her again then I can have my much needed vacation in the States.”

“So now that makes five of you going to America. Nino?”

“Well, I don’t really have any plans this summer. Just chill out and relax, y’know, make some playlist, listen to some music.”

“Ooh! How about you come with us, babe? That’ll be so cool and not all of us will be doing something most of the time while we’re there. You can just chill and relax there and maybe you could even study the kind of music they listen to and make a playlist out of it.”

“I would love to go, but I don’t think I really got the money for it. ‘Sides, my parents might not allow me to go out of the country.”

“You’re already 18 and if your parents ever say no, just tell them that you want to really relax, without keeping your emotions in check and have the freedom to let it out. I’m sure they’ll understand and unlike my Father, they actually listen to you.”

“As for the money, I have some savings and if you want I can lend you some-”

“But-”

“Lend. I’m not just giving it to you. You will have to pay me back, alright? And if you try to say no again, I’m going to insist that you don’t pay me anymore.”

“You sure? You're the best! Thanks, Minette.”

“No problem. So now that makes six of them—”

“Seven.”

“What?”

“Seven. We’re including you.”

“Me? But Alya, I already got plans this summer.”

“Plans? What plans?”

“I was planning on working on my commissions this summer an— Guys, can you all stop rolling your eyes on me and no, Chloe. I don’t need you doing it again.”

“Girl! We all agreed that we’re going to take a break this summer. How does doing your commissions sound like a break to you?”

“You all got your own thing to do this summer and mine just happens to be those. Also, the break was for anything Miraculous related. My commissions don't exactly fall under that.”

“Nope. We actually all agreed that for you, commissions should be added to the list of things you get to take a break from.”

“Adrien! I thought you’re supposed to be my partner? So much for the two of us against the world.”

“He is still your partner alright. But also, as someone who truly cares about you, he decided that you really needed a break. And besides girl, this could be your chance!”

“Chance? What chance?”

“Your pen pal! Doesn’t he live in Gotham? You could go and finally meet him. Who knows? Maybe something might happen.”

“Ooh, he’s from there? That’s awesome! You should totally go meet him. Maybe you could even go on a date or two-”

“A date?! Kim, he’s just a frie-”

“You stop right there, Dupain-Cheng! It’s ridiculous, utterly ridiculous! All of us already had enough with Adrikins always calling you ‘just a friend’ when it’s pretty obvious how totally untrue that statement was. We don’t need you ending up just like him, thank you very much.”

“But he really is-”

“Yeah right. If he really is just a friend, then why do you guys stay up all night talking to each other? You always immediately check your phone whenever a notif comes up and you smile like a love-sick fool whenever you read his messages for you. And don’t get me started on the way you gush about him non-stop.”

“There is something beautiful in your music whenever you talk or even think about him.”

“Your smiles are much brighter compared to before the two of you got to know each other.”

“Markov and I also have a record of your heartbeat and we have observed your heart beating faster whenever we talk about this certain topic.”

“And it's been more than a year since you two have become pen pals. The two of you are now so close that it’s a wonder why you guys still haven’t video-called each other just because you insist for your first time seeing each other to be in person.”

“I think it’s rather romantic. They’ll look into each other’s eyes for the first time then BAM! They’re finally together. But I still plan on giving him a shovel talk the first chance I get. Can’t have him break my twin’s heart without him knowing I have the god of destruction on my side.”

“What do you mean shovel talk- I mean, what even gives you the idea that he thinks of me that way for you guys to assume that we’ll end up in… in that kind of relationship?”

“He’d be an idiot if he still hasn’t fallen in love with you.”

“Literally almost everyone I know had a crush on you or have you forgotten already that my boyfriend’s one of those people?”

“I know for a fact that that’s true since I’ve already admitted that one of my reasons why I began bullying you back then was because I had a crush on you.”

“I must admit, I think I also had the same feeling towards you at the beginning of our friendship until I really got to know Luka and you helped us get together.”

“Oh! There’s also that. Do you actually know just how many people you’ve helped get together, buginette? Alya’s even written an article about it at the Ladyblog of how you are also known as Paris’s own cupid and how all of the couples you’ve paired ended up living a happy life together.”

“Everyone’s been saying how Ladybug’s the next best person they can go to if they ever want to find love after Andre.”

“And yet every time you try to pair yourself with someone, the magic just doesn’t seem to work.”

“So we all decided that we’ll be Ladybug’s cupid and pair her up with the boy she just can’t seem to get off of her head.”

“Now, you coming or what? I won’t be taking the money you’ll be lending me if you say no. I’m only going with these dudes if you also come or else I’ll just end up getting bored when there’s no one who can go around the city with me.”

“...”

“““...”””

“Fine. You guys win—”

“““YES!”””

“So here’s the final plan for the break. Kim, Alix, and Max will be staying in Paris for Kim’s competition, while the rest of us will be going to America doing our own stuff—”

“With you finally meeting your pen pal.”

“Yes. Alright. I’ll go and meet my pen pal. And during the break, no thinking about anything miraculous related. If ever there’s an akuma, only those who’ll be needed will go. Max will bring us to the akuma’s location and if there is anything going on that we can’t be excused of or if the fight goes longer than expected, Alix will bring us back in time making it look like we just went to the toilets, the usuals. Any questions?”

“““Non.”””

“Good. Operation: Taking a Break is good to go.”

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Yay! Finally got to post it. So comments? What do you guys think and who do you think who is saying what? I know there will be new holders in S4, but I decided I’ll either make them a temp or they still don’t know the other’s identities bc of stuff, so yeah. Still thinking abt it. Adios (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31840603

[keigoslovebird]

The Cat That Caught the Canary

Pairing: Hawks/Keigo Takami x Fem!Reader

Warnings: violence/threats of violence. A bit of swearing. Reader is fem and has a cat mutant quirk. 

Genre: fluff, some suggestive content near the end

Word count: 7k

Author’s note: This is my very first MHA fic and I am so excited to share my love of Hawks with you all! There will be multiple chapters and smut, angst, and the like later on. I can’t promise any sort of regular updates, but I will do my very best to be semi-consistent. It is very self indulgent and very sweet because I’ve got the big dumb for the bird man. Please enjoy 7k words worth of Hawks fluff and let me know what you think!

Also, “koneko” means little cat or kitten in Japanese.

You don’t know how it happens, but it does. 

You’re walking home from the train station, cutting into a secluded alleyway because the sun hasn’t set yet and there’s still sunlight spilling over rooftops. Your perceptive ears twitch and turn towards the sound of rustling and the shuffling of feet. Your instincts tell you to speed up, to run because there’s something out there, but a lifetime of fighting those instincts forces those feelings down. It’s probably someone else just trying to walk home, it’s fine, you tell yourself. Just to be safe you carefully turn around to look behind you, hoping to see some kind old lady walking down the street.

There’s no one in sight but you just know there’s somebody out there. You sense their presence, their movements but you can’t see them. It feels as if someone has dumped a bucket of ice water over your head, a sickly chill settling deep within your bones. Something is wrong, very wrong.

“I know you’re there. I can hear you,” You call out into the seemingly empty valley between two houses. When no one responds you quickly turn on your heel and head towards the busy, bustling street a few hundred feet ahead. 

“Not so fast, kitty cat,” A low, gravelly voice breathes into your ear. They’re so close you can feel their breath on your neck, tainted with the smell of cigarettes and whiskey. Panic seizes and constricts your heart so fast that you don’t even think before you break out in a sprint. If you can just make it to the street you’ll be okay. The second your shoes hit the pavement, a hand grabs you by your shirt collar and harshly yanks backwards. You’re pulled further into the alley and into the shadows beginning to emerge from above as the sun starts to set.

You feel your back slam into a concrete wall, head bouncing off of it so quickly and forcefully you see stars and a dull ache begins to form at the back of your skull. You’re momentarily dazed, vision slightly blurry but you’re still able to make out two large figures looming over you menacingly. One of them has you caged between their thick, hairy arms, effectively trapping you in place, not that you could’ve outrun them anyhow. You’re small and agile, but they’re just so much bigger than you, or at least it seems that way. It takes a few seconds for your vision to clear, but now you see that your captors are two very large, very intimidating men. The one caging you in is much taller and more muscular than the other. The man to his right has chin-length black hair that’s greasy, likely unwashed for several days, if ever. He’s thin and spindly and the look on his face is reminiscent of a spider awaiting its prey. Your ears flatten against your head, tail tucking between your trembling legs as you realize the gravity of the situation you’re in.

“What’s a cute little thing like you doing walking around alone?” You recognize the voice as the one who called out to you before. He’s standing beside his burly friend who has you trapped. You can smell the cheap alcohol and smoke on the man’s breath even stronger now that he’s so close. “It’s far too dangerous at night. You never know what kinds of things could be lurking in the shadows, just waiting to take a bite into a sweet, tasty morsel like yourself.”

Your heart races, hammering so furiously that it feels as if it’ll beat out of your chest. You’re frozen and silent from the fear overtaking your entire body. The feeling of dread and terror is icy and sharp in your veins.

“I’m curious, kitty cat. Are these real?” The long-haired man reaches a gangly, too long arm over and grabs your ears in a punishing grip. You reach up in an attempt to bat his hands away but the muscular man moves his hands from the wall to hold your hands at your sides. The long-haired man’s other hand snakes between your legs, reaching for your tail and yanking it with a force that makes you yelp. You can feel tears prick your eyes and you shut them tightly to avoid letting them see you cry.

“Yes! They’re part of my quirk. Please stop, that hurts,” You whimper, lip trembling with unshed tears. The hold on your sensitive ears is beginning to overwhelm your senses. “I don’t have much money on me, just take whatever you want but please don’t hurt me.” You plead with them, just hoping they were looking for an easy target to get some quick cash from. 

Before any of you can react, there’s a flash of crimson and suddenly the man who had been holding you in place is knocked off his feet. “Wha-,” The long-haired man doesn’t get a word in before he too has his feet swept out from underneath him. You look over in the direction where the projectiles came from and nearly faint at the sight of number two pro hero Hawks perched atop a building above you. He swoops down from his perch, his huge scarlet wings seeming larger than life as he lands beside you. The two men who attacked you are laying on the ground, feathers wrapped around their wrists.

“Miss, are you alright? I’m sorry I couldn’t get to you earlier, there was another situation downtown that made me late for my patrols,” Hawks looks genuinely apologetic and the whole situation is just so overwhelming and your head is reeling at how fast everything has shifted since he arrived. The chemicals coursing through your body are making your head swim and your thoughts are so jumbled and fragmented you can barely string together a coherent sentence. 

“Y-yes, I’m fine! Thank you, Hawks, I am grateful that you came to rescue me.” You manage to stutter out, bowing at the waist to show your gratitude. In your state of confusion you forgot to address Hawks formally, making you squeak at your carelessness. “Ah! H-Hawks-san I’m sorry for being so casual.” A fiery blush begins to spread across your cheeks from your embarrassment and Hawks’ close proximity. You’ve seen him in tabloids, plastered across social media, and on local news stations, but this is the first time you’ve seen a pro hero in person, let alone such a handsome one.

Hawk’s cool, collected persona rarely wavers, but what does make it waver is the warm, rosy glow of your cheeks and the way your eyes sparkle as you talk to him. He notices that your fuzzy little ears are twitching and he wonders how soft the fur would feel between his fingers. 

“Ah, no need to be so formal with me. I don’t mind when people talk to me casually.” He waves a gloved hand in the air dismissively. Smiling brightly, he shows off his perfect, pearly white teeth. His smile is so warm and infectious that you find yourself smiling back at him. “Especially when they’re as pretty as you are.” He winks and you feel your blush deepen and spread even further across your face. You knew about Hawks’ flirtatiousness from social media posts and tabloids that detailed his various flings, but you never expected it to be directed at you.

Hawk’s eyes flick down to your mouth, hoping it’s too brief for you to catch or that you’re too frazzled to notice. He finds his gaze lingering a bit too long on how your glossy, pink lips part and the way the corners upturn when you smile. He analyzes your face, taking in every painstaking detail to commit it to memory. He takes note of the beauty marks and dimples that frame your pretty, tender smile. It’s a genuine expression of gratitude that makes his insides fuzzy and warm. He wants to wrap himself in the feeling, revel in it, and never let it go.

“O-Oh well thank you and you have my gratitude, Hawks,” You look away shyly, scratching the back of your head sheepishly. You can feel the tip of your tail begin to flick out of anxiety and attempt to subtly reach down and grab it to still its movement. You hope and pray that he doesn’t the way your voice wobbles.

“It was my pleasure, miss. I’m always here to help, it’s my job after all,” He looks as if he’s about to say something else when his phone buzzes from his pocket. He pulls it out and sighs tiredly. “I’m sorry for leaving so suddenly but duty calls. Don’t worry about these guys, I’ve already called the Police Force and they’re on their way. Those feathers will restrain them until the police get here,” He flicks his visor down over his eyes and his wings begin to flap, stirring the air around you as he gets ready to take off toward wherever the Commission has called him to.

A part of Hawks wishes to stay here with you a bit longer, a part of him that he’s been taught to rein in and repress for the sake of his hero duties. He can’t stop and comfort every civilian that he saves when there’s countless more that need him. The frightened, nervous look in your eyes tugs at his heart strings and he just wants to tell you it’ll be okay, but he doesn’t let himself indulge in those thoughts for very long. He’s Hawks, number two pro hero, the man who’s a bit too fast. He has too many people relying on him, counting on him to even entertain the thoughts in his head. 

“W-Wait! I want to thank you somehow.” You blurt out, cringing at the way your voice squeaks. There’s a weighty beat of silence while you dig around in your purse to retrieve a card. “I work at a cat café… Here’s a gift card for a free drink. It’s not much but I wanted to at least give you something.” You awkwardly thrust the card in Hawk’s direction, eyes wandering to avoid making direct eye contact with him. He takes the card and smiles at you again but this time it’s softer, sweeter and it stirs something deep in your belly. This smile feels more authentic and less rehearsed than the kilowatt smile he flashes for the cameras. He takes the card and gingerly tucks it in the pocket of his coat.

The card, emblazoned with the cafe’s name and decorated with paw prints, radiates warmth against his chest.

“Thanks, kid. I’ll drop by sometime when I’m not busy saving the world.” He winks, giving you a two finger salute and in a flourish of brilliant vermillion feathers, he’s gone just as quickly as he came.

He regrets saying that he’ll stop by because truthfully, he doesn’t know if he’ll be able to. The Commission has him working more than ever and he never gets a day off, if the dark circles hidden under the concealer underneath his eyes are any indication. He knows he shouldn’t have given you false hope that you’ll see him again, but the way your smile constricts his heart and your scent steals the breath from his lungs, he knows that if you called out for him, he’d come running.

━━

Many weeks pass before you see Hawks again and you begin to think that he has simply forgotten or is just choosing not to see you, a thought that makes your shoulders sag and your ears droop. But really, what would a talented, successful guy like Hawks want with an average girl like you? Sure he said you were cute, but he probably tells lots of people that.

It starts out just like any average day at the cat café you work at. You show up to work at seven am, three hours before opening so you have time to prepare for the day. You unlock the front door with your key and your boss calls out a hello from the back where she’s tending to the cats before they’re allowed to roam the café. 

The café itself is small but cozy and intimate, sandwiched between a bookstore and a thrift store. It always smells like chamomile and daisies, both for customers’ and the cats’ enjoyment. The overhead lights give off a soft, warm glow. There’s several tables and chairs set up along the walls, cat trees and scratching posts taking up most of the free middle space. It’s never terribly busy, just enough to keep the café open and the cats cared for.

You begin your opening duties, starting with sweeping the floors and wiping down surfaces. This part takes the longest because you have to be thorough and diligent in your cleaning, lest you want another visit from the Tokyo Health Department. You decorate the cookies and cupcakes your boss’s wife makes with cat faces and paw prints and arrange them in the dessert display case. Once you finish your duties, it’s time to let the cats out to roam. You open the door that separates the café from the room that the cats play in before opening and five cats come prancing out, the little bells on their collars jingling softly as they move. One of the cats, a grey Scottish fold, rubs against your legs and meows cheerfully at you.

“Good morning Chibi, it’s nice to see you too,” You lean down to scratch between her ears and she purrs, enjoying the affection. “I’ll check with the boss soon to see if we can get another one of those mouse toys that I know you like, how does that sound?” The cat chirps appreciatively and head butts your hand before walking off to convene with the other cats. They’re surrounding the 5 cat bowls nestled in the corner of the café, noticing the blatant lack of wet food in their bowls. Their eyes are dilated, ears pointed forward to express their annoyance. One of the cats reaches his paw into the bowl and pokes the little bits of dry food around it. “I know what you guys are thinking and you’re not getting more wet food after yesterday when Shiro and Kuro ate so much they threw up in a customer’s lap. The same customer. Dry food only today,” You warn over your shoulder as you go behind the counter to put on a clean apron. One of the cats makes a noise akin to a grumble and another seemingly rolls her eyes.

Ten a.m. rolls around and your boss unlocks the front door for the public. A handful of people come in and order the typical fare of cappuccinos and lattes while they play with the cats. You busy yourself with making drinks and cleaning up any messes the cats make while your boss mans the cash register. The sounds of the café blend and intermingle into an ambient, comfortable backdrop to a pleasant atmosphere. A few patrons scattered throughout the cafe are chatting quietly with their companions and the cats are chasing each other around their cat tree, the bells on their collars gently tinkling.

It seems like just a normal day. Until he shows up.

You’re in the middle of making a customer’s cappuccino when you see Hawks through the café window. Your body jerks so hard you almost destroy the cat face that you were drawing in the foam. You never actually expected him to show up and now your head tingles at the possibility that he’s here to see you, although your voice of reason tells you to dampen your excitement. He’s probably here just for the cats or the drinks, nothing more.

Hawks is in his civilian clothes and has a pair of sunglasses on, but those scarlet wings are recognizable anywhere, despite how much smaller and sparser they are. You notice by the way he moves he’s tired, a little worse for wear. 

The bell above the door dings as he swings it open, his presence seeming to suffocate the entire room. Any source of conversation ceases and all heads turn toward the door, including the cats. No one would expect for one of the top heroes in Japan to visit a tiny cat café on the outskirts of Musutafu, in fact, this is one of the last places one would expect to see him in. He’s rarely seen outside of the hustle and bustle of the metropolitan areas, and even rarer seen off duty and out of his hero costume.

A couple of people go up to him and ask for pictures of autographs, which he graciously gives with that signature million-dollar smile on his face. He’s inwardly thankful that the café is in one of the more sparsely populated areas of the city so he’s not caught up in entertaining the public when he’s really here for just one thing. You. 

You’re standing behind the serving counter, a determined look on your face as you use a toothpick to draw in the foam of the cup in front of you. Your hair is pulled into a ponytail and you’re wearing a cream-colored apron with the cafe’s logo on it. Your tongue is cutely poking out between your lips, eyes thoroughly focused on your task and the sight is so endearing that he feels warmth spread throughout his body. There’s a tingling in his spine that he knows he should ignore, but the temptation to come see you again was too great to ignore.

“Welcome Hawks-sama! Please sit down and relax. Whatever you would like is on the house, just please let us know and we’ll get it for you right away!” Your boss rushes to Hawks and excitedly babbles at him as he approaches the sale counter, awe-struck and taken aback by the hero’s unexpected appearance. She bows deeply and not-so-subtly gestures at you to bow as well, mouthing “be respectful” and jerking her head in his direction. Flustered by her threatening passion at properly greeting Hawks, you put the cappuccino you were holding onto the counter and bow.

“Thank you for such a warm welcome, ma’am. I insist on paying for anything I order, but I happen to have a gift card from a certain employee of yours.” He grins in your direction, his eyes full of mirth and amusement at your boss’s enthusiasm.

“Of course, sir! Please let the barista know when you’re ready to order and feel free to stay as long as you’d like!” She speaks a bit too fast and a bit too loud, a few customers turning their heads in the direction of the commotion, but Hawks doesn’t seem to mind, likely used to these types of reactions. The ringing of a phone is heard from the back of the store and a conflicted look crosses your boss’s face, not wanting to leave and miss the opportunity to talk to him. “I apologize for the rude interruption sir, but I have an important phone call I must answer. Koneko-chan here can take care of anything you need. Now if you’ll excuse me.” Your boss bows again, hesitating to actually leave but eventually she does, leaving you alone with Hawks.

“I’ve asked her many times not to call me that in front of customers. I have a name but she refuses to call me by it, saying it’s important for the theme of the café, or something like that,” You smile shyly at him, unsure where to look or where to put your hands so you put them behind your back. Your tail is flicking again from your uncertainty and in your head you’re willing it stop.

“Well, what is your name? I never got the chance to ask the day we met and I regret going all this time without knowing your name. Unless you'd like for me to call you Koneko-chan, it’s a pretty cute nickname for an even cuter girl.” Hawks’ tone is laced with a teasing flirtatiousness that makes your heart flutter. He leisurely leans on the shop counter, propping his chin up one of his hands.

“Ah, well, Koneko-chan is a childhood nickname so I don’t mind being called by it, I even enjoy it. I prefer to be called my name by customers, but you can call me whatever you’d like, Hawks.” You look up at him through your lashes and shyly tell him your name, hoping you’re not mistaking his friendliness for flirtatiousness and that he really is expressing an interest in you. 

“Koneko-chan it is.” He declares, flashing you another glimpse of that perfect smile that makes your heart skip a beat. He nods in agreement with himself, as if he was closing some sort of negotiation. “But say, I think you owe me a drink. Could I get an iced coffee, extra sugar?” He scans the menu for a brief second but you know he’s just looking for some caffeine, judging by the slight drooping of his shoulders and the exhaustion you can see through his jovial expression. He hands you the card that you gave him several weeks ago. What he doesn’t say is that he’s kept it in the pocket of his coat since that day, periodically patting it to make sure it was still there, even pulling it out when he had a free moment to spare, despite how far and few between those moments tend to be.

He almost doesn’t like how easily you’ve managed to get inside his head. The part of his brain that was trained to be a hero tells him that he shouldn’t entertain the idea of anything more than a friendship with you, let alone show up to your job and continue to stoke the fire that’s building inside him. The other part of his brain tells him that he deserves to have this sweet, secret little thing with you, even if it’s only for a little while because right now he doesn’t feel like Hawks, number two pro hero of Fierce Wings. He feels like Keigo Takami, an average 23-year-old guy trying to talk to a girl he likes, dare he say, a girl he has a crush on.

“Of course, I’ll get right on it,” You turn to start preparing his drink and check the watch on your wrist. “It’s almost my lunch break, would you like to sit and talk for a bit?” You can hear the insecurity in your voice and hope it doesn’t make him rethink whatever this thing is that’s blooming between you.

“How could I turn down good coffee and good company? Of course, I’d love to.” Hawks eagerly nods his head in his palm, beaming with pleasant agreement.

“Feel free to sit down while I make your drink. I’m sure the cats would love to meet you.” You start pressing buttons on the coffee machine and look over your shoulder to give him a warning.  “Although, I would be careful with those wings of yours, they might mistake them for a toy.” You giggle to yourself at the thought of the cats cornering him, looks of curiosity and wonder on their faces as they use their little paws to bat at his feathers. You don’t notice that Hawks is watching you with a feathered eyebrow raised out of his own curiosity and wonder of what’s going through your head. What he wouldn’t give just to know what you’re thinking about, what you think about him.

“I don’t mind, at least I’ll be useful for something while I’m plucked this thin!” He shakes his sparse wings for emphasis, showcasing the fact that they’re little more than tufts of feathers about the size of your palm. He removes himself from the counter he’s been leaning over for the past ten minutes and walks over to a table to sit and wait. He waves at you from his seat, pointing to the chair across the table from him and grinning, reminiscent of a child that spots their friend from across the cafeteria. 

You don’t know why such a talented, handsome, accomplished guy like Hawks wants to spend time with you, a quiet, ordinary girl but you’re not about to question it. You want to cherish this moment and take advantage of the time you get with him because you know nothing is guaranteed or assured in his world.

After you finish making his drink you hang up your apron and make your way to the table in the corner where Hawks is sitting. You set the cup down in front of him and slide into your seat, a cat hopping into your lap not seconds later. He’s a little ginger cat named Mikan and you scratch behind his ears absentmindedly while he makes biscuits on your thighs.

Now that you’ve changed out of your work apron, Hawks can really take in your appearance. He already knew you were pretty, but he didn’t realize just how stunning you are. You’re wearing a pair of well-worn light blue denim jeans, they’re form-fitting and accentuate the swell of your hips and he has to resist ogling your butt as you walk over. Your top is form fitting as well, the material stretched over your breasts enticingly. He gives you a quick once over before you sit down, hopefully subtle enough that you don’t notice his eyes wandering. He wills those thoughts away in favor of focusing on how thankful he is to even be sitting here with you.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to come see you. I don’t get a lot of time off, but they just had to give me some after they saw the state of these things.” Hawks’ tone is joking and light, but you can hear the exhaustion and weariness that tinges his words.“ They’ll regrow soon, it just takes a few days, but I can’t save the world without my wings so I get some time to visit my favorite cat girl.” He winks, his flirtatiousness causing you to quickly avert your eyes to the cat in your lap. You coyly look back up at him and smile when you find his gaze unwaveringly trained on you. Each time you look at him, it feels as if those piercing golden irises are analyzing your every move, every change in your expression. 

That’s not really too far from the truth. A part of Hawks’ hero training was dedicated to recognizing body language cues and facial expressions. It’s been ingrained in him to search for dishonesty, any hint of wrongdoing in the way a person carries themselves. When he looks into those wide, inviting eyes of yours that seem to put him in an unbreakable trance, he doesn’t even know if he could resist you even if you did turn out to be malicious. It should scare him, and it does, but not as much as it should. As much as he’s observed you, he knows you aren’t being disingenuous by the open, unguarded expression on your face and the way you’re casually leaning towards him as he speaks. 

Your voice interrupts his internal monologue, his racing thoughts coming to a screeching halt.

“Oh, I’m sure you know lots of girls with mutant cat quirks. Even if you do, I still better be your favorite.” Judging from the way a smirk is tugging at the corners of your lips and the playful inflection of your voice, you’re teasing him. 

Oh, he likes that. He likes it a lot. 

It sends a delightful shiver down his spine and he’s silently thankful that his wings are much smaller than their usual size, otherwise you would notice the way they’re twitching.

He’s only just met you and he’s already so smitten he would do anything for you. He would rip the moon and stars out of the fucking sky with his bare hands if you asked him to. The effect you have on him is dangerous, he knows this, but he’s never been one to shy away from danger.

“You know you are, Koneko-chan. You’re the only kitty for me.” He sighs dreamily, leaning forward to rest his chin on his hands. The lights overhead reflect off of his pupils, highlighting the mischievous glint in his half-lidded eyes. You laugh, high-pitched and contagious, and he’ll do anything to hear it again. His head is swimming with the swarm of emotions he’s experiencing all at once and it feels as if he’s simultaneously drowning and taking his first real breath of fresh air.

Hawks seems to be deep in thought and you take it as an opportunity to admire his beauty. Your eyes follow the angle of his jawline, the high, regal slope of his nose. You focus on those mesmerizing golden eyes and the black markings that give them a more avian-like appearance. He really is devastatingly handsome and to make matters worse, he knows it and he knows you’re staring at him by the way he’s smirking.

You’re so taken by one another that you don’t notice Mikan climb up on the table to meow at you loudly, demanding your attention by headbutting your arm. You chuckle lightly at the cat’s jealousy towards the man across from him, who he sees as the one who’s stealing all of your attention. Hawks watches, fascinated by the way you and the cat have this wordless, unspoken conversation through your eyes. You notice the way he’s watching you two with quizzical interest and you smile, knowing exactly what’s going through his head. 

“Despite what many people think, I can’t communicate with them. Our physiologies are just too different.” You explain as you scratch Mikan’s chin, the cat purring in contentment. “But I am more attuned to their emotions and I empathize with the way they’re feeling because I often feel the same way. It’s an essentially useless quirk but it has its perks, especially here.” The cat rubs his chin against yours and you lean in closer to let him rub his scent on you.

Hawks smiles and can feel his heart swell at the sweet, tender moment between you and the small animal in your lap. He chuckles to himself when he notices that both of your tails are twitching, a sign that a cat is happy, if the extensive Googling he’s done about cat behavior is worth anything. He wants to remember this moment forever, just him, a pretty girl, and a cat in a little cafe miles from the city center. He wants to keep it, tuck it away in his pocket to covet for himself. It feels as if you’re the only two people in the world and for now, you are and that’s all that really matters. 

You feel like you’re floating on a cloud in some faraway land, just waiting for the sobering free fall back down to earth. The way the sunlight hits his flaxen hair like some sort of halo makes him look like an angel and you think he may as well be one. He’s so radiant and ethereal that you feel like you’re being burned alive but you can’t bring yourself to care. You don’t mind as long as it’s his light that burns you.

You’re suddenly jerked from your shared reverie by your boss yelling at you that your break is over. Mikan darts from your lap at the sudden outburst and you both jolt in your seats as well. 

“I’m really sorry, I have to get back to work.” You get up from your seat, trying to look and sound as apologetic as you feel. “But if you want to hang out some more, I’ll be off in a few hours and there’s a cute little park a couple streets from the café that we could meet at… Only if you want! You’re probably busy...” You speak quietly, shifting your weight from one foot to the other in uncertainty.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world, Koneko-chan.” Hawks says it with a wink, but he really means it. Bar a national disaster, he’d be there just to see you for a little longer.

Hawks hangs around the café for another hour before leaving to stroll through the streets of your quiet little corner of Musutafu, appreciating the lack of attention he gets as he walks around. 

You get off around 4 p.m. and rush to the park you had mentioned to Hawks. True to his word, he’s there, leisurely leaned back on a bench in the middle of the park, watching the birds fly amongst the trees. You join him on the bench, sitting an appropriate amount of space away from him, close enough to be friendly but far enough away to give him adequate personal space. 

“You’re here.” You sound a little breathless and surprised and it almost comes out like a question.

“Of course I am. I said I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” There’s no teasing, no flirtatiousness in Hawks’ voice and the way he speaks so matter-of-factly momentarily startles you. You know this isn’t a side of him that many people get to see and you’re thankful for it.

You talk until the sun hangs low in the sky, learning whatever you can about one another. Your voice feels scratchy from overuse and you feel like you’re dominating the conversation, words tumbling out of your mouth before you can stop them.

Hawks is more than happy to let you do most of the talking. You likely already know most of what’s publicly known about him and what isn’t public knowledge he knows he can’t tell you, at least not yet. He wouldn’t really know what to talk about outside of heroism, he doesn’t have the same opportunities that any other guy in his early twenties does and he knows it would be hard to relate to him. So, he lets you lead the conversation, hanging on to your every word, adding his own input every once in a while. 

You know you’re talking a lot, but Hawks doesn’t seem to mind so you don’t mind either. You’re mostly content with doing most of the talking, but there’s a question burning a hole in your chest that you have to ask him. You pivot your body towards him, placing a gentle hand on top of his and he has to ignore the tingling sensation where your skin meets his.

A serious look takes over your features and anxiety steals the breath from Hawks’ lungs, worried that you’ve completely changed your mind about him, that you’re going to tell him to go away and leave you alone because you don’t need the drama in your life that will inevitably follow you if you were to ever pursue anything with him.

“Hawks...” You start, apprehensive as you struggle to find the right words to say. “You’re always so busy saving and taking care of other people, but who takes care of you?” The moment the words leave your lips you want to take them back, his happy expression quickly fading to a look of somber contemplation.

Hawks is stunned into uncharacteristic silence by the seriousness of your words and the vulnerable expression on your face. No one has asked him about his own wellbeing before, excluding people who ask whether he’s physically fit enough to keep doing his job, whether he’s still of use. His entire life he’s been worked to the bone with little regard for his health, let alone his happiness. He’s been trained to be the government’s human weapon against evil and he’s damn good at being a weapon, but it’s often forgotten what he really is. 

A human.

“I… I don’t know,” Hawks’ voice is filled with a rare uncertainty that he’s not sure that he likes. He sighs tiredly, running a hand through his already unruly mess of blonde hair. “I haven’t really thought about it before.” He sounds defeated and it’s the most heartbreaking thing you’ve ever heard and you can feel a lump form in your throat. He has spent every moment of his short life helping people, preventing disasters, saving the world while carrying that heavy burden on his shoulders. He’s Winged Hero Hawks, number two pro hero and his persona is so grand, so great that he feels larger than life. But right now he looks so small sitting next to you on the park bench you’re afraid he might disappear right before your eyes. 

You’re looking at him with those pretty eyes yours that are so full of warmth and love that he just wants to kiss you. He doesn’t give himself time to think about the consequences of what he’s about to do, moving faster than his brain can react.

He puts a rough, calloused palm on your cheek, eyes flicking from your mouth to your eyes, wordlessly asking for permission. Your pulse quickens from his close proximity, his breath fanning over your cheeks and you can smell the sweetness of the coffee that he drank earlier. 

With a slight nod of your head Hawks closes his eyes and leans in, his lips getting closer and you swear your heart is beating so loud he can surely hear it. Your stomach is in knots and you’re not sure you’re taking in enough oxygen. You let your eyes flutter shut and part your lips, your breath quickening as you feel his body press against your own. When your lips finally meet it feels as if the world and time itself have stopped. Your senses are overwhelmed by his musky cologne, his vanilla lip balm, his soft lips against yours. 

Him. 

You can’t see or feel anything but him and you’re so overwhelmed you think you might die, filled with Hawks in every sense of the word, but you can’t even think of anything but him.

Hawks, Hawks, Hawks. 

You’re repeating his name in your head like a mantra, hoping it’ll keep you grounded. His fingers are tangled in your hair you think, but you’re not really sure, not with the way his lips are moving, needy and insistent against your own. You let out a squeak of surprise when you feel his hot, wet tongue probe between your lips and he swiftly loops one arm around your back and hooks the other around your thigh, half pulling you onto his lap. 

The cute little sighs and hums you’re making fill Hawks with more satisfaction than they should. He opens one of his eyes to take a guilty peek at you and he can’t think of anything prettier than the sight of your blushing, squirming body in his lap. He experimentally licks at the inside of your mouth, gauging your reaction before sliding his tongue against your own.

A voice, albeit a very small one, in the back of your head tells you to stop, you’re still in a public park and the sun is halfway hidden behind the landscape. You try to pull away from Hawks but he just leans in further, his lips following yours, so you gently but firmly push against his chest to separate yourselves.

When your lips part there’s a string of saliva that still connects you and Hawks thinks it’s the most erotic thing he’s ever seen. 

It takes a few seconds for his higher thinking to return, but when it does worry he begins to etch itself into his features when he realizes you’ve pushed him away, wings pressing against his back.

“Hey, did I do something wrong there? I thought it was pretty good, and I think you did too judging by those noises you were making.” He always falls back on old habits, trying to mask his insecurity with flippant arrogance. You shake your head, a look of apology on your face.

“As much as I’m enjoying myself, I’d rather not grope each other in the middle of a park like a couple of teenagers,” you muse, “But I would love to see you again and pick up where we left off.” Your tone is suggestive and Hawks can feel his jeans tighten from the implication of your words.

“Ah, of course. I should be treating you like the proper lady you are, and here I am disrespecting your honor in a park.” Hawks tries to lighten the mood, his nerve endings still singing from your little make out session. The air around you feels hot and sticky against his skin and he’s trying to calm the blood rushing in his ears.

“Don’t worry about it. I really, really liked it.” You can feel the heat rise in your cheeks once more, despite the fact that moments ago you were almost dry humping in Hawks’ lap. “But it’s getting late and we both should head home.” You sigh, not wanting to leave your little bubble away from the chaos of the world. You stand up, holding your hand out to him. 

He takes your hand and rises from his seat on the bench. The way that your head just barely grazes his chin makes him realize how small you are. Have you always been that small?

“Hey Hawks?” Your eyes are shining again and you’re playing with a loose thread on Hawks’ jacket. 

“Yeah?” There’s a sort of pleading in your eyes and Hawks wants so badly to give you whatever you want, whatever you’re about to ask him he knows he’ll say yes.

“About what I said earlier…” You start, reaching for his hand and lacing your small fingers with his and squeezing. “I’ll take care of you, if you’ll let me.”