Tumgik
#i also just watched the menu a few days ago and i think that film is another perfect example of this issue
rollercoasterwords · 2 years
Note
Hello there. This is me asking you to talk about the glass onion thing, I wanna know 😌
Tumblr media Tumblr media
ok i just spent. an hour. writing a whole essay. and then accidentally deleted it. so!!!! i don't think i have the energy to rewrite the whole thing but the condensed version of the glass onion thoughts:
the movie itself was fun and i don't think there's anything wrong with enjoying it, but what bothers me is seeing so many responses praising the movie as though it was this groundbreaking anticapitalist critique when in reality the actual message of the movie was neither groundbreaking nor particularly anticapitalist and the movie itself is very much invested in capitalism; it's a film made by a multi-billion corporation whose primary purpose is to make rich people richer.
and i think a lot of this uncritically positive praise that treats the movie as though it's making some important political statement is falling into the trap of asking "does this media say something good or bad" rather than asking "is this media a lecture or a conversation." because sure, glass onion seems to be saying "eat the rich!", but that message is very carefully outlined in bite-sized chunks that are then spoonfed to the audience. like, it's very clear who's good and who's bad, and it's very clear why those people are good and bad, to the point that the viewer isn't really encouraged to question those assumptions and is supposed to just sit back and agree with the points the movie is making. and if more people were approaching media critique with the starting point of "is this a lecture or a conversation," i think fewer people would fall into this trap of just going "oh, this movie is saying something i agree with!" and instead pause and ask "why isn't this movie encouraging me to draw my own conclusions?" because in the case of glass onion, i think the answer to that question is that the movie is not really making any groundbreaking critique and is rather a perfect example of "anti-capitalist" capitalist media that works to keep people complacent by making them feel as though there's some important challenge being made when there's not.
20 notes · View notes
purplesurveys · 1 year
Text
1727
Did you get enough rest last night?  I really didn't. I slept at 5 AM thinking that would surely let me sleep in the entire morning, but my body still automatically woke me up at 9 and didn't let sleep again by then.
What was the last thing that kept you awake?  That would be right now – I finished off the entire first season of D.P. which I ended at around half past midnight, and now I'm back in my room downing the rest of my coffee with no intention to sleep yet, even with just four hours of rest haha.
If you have pets, do they sleep in your bedroom at night?  No, they have their own corner in the living room.
Can you sleep with background noise or does it keep you up?  It helps me fall asleep as the light noise gives me a sense of security, so I kind of need it.
Do you ever take naps? Do you take long naps or little power naps?  Occasionally. I can never do power naps as they always end up feeling super insufficient for me, and I prefer having 3-4 hour naps.
What helps when you have trouble sleeping?  I'd need to go through my phone and watch a lot of videos since that quickly gets the job done.
Who was the last person to cook you a meal? What did they make?  My mom made pasta for sharing a few days ago.
Who was the last person you cooked a meal for? What did you make?  I don't cook for anyone, because I don't cook.
Who is your female celeb crush? (If applicable)  Song Hye Kyo, Park Jihyo.
Who is your male celeb crush? (If applicable)  RM of BTS.
Tell me about an interesting article you’ve read recently.  Andi shared a pretty unique piece with me this morning which was basically a personal essay of why McDonald's' Coke seems to taste better than Coke literally anywhere else. It was silly yet insightful, mundane yet so weirdly intriguing and fascinating. For somebody who doesn't even like soda, I found myself reading until the very end. I liked it a lot and subscribed to that author right away lol.
Do you have a favorite Marvel character?  I'm not into anything superhero.
Favorite DC character?  Yeah, no.
Do you read comic books?  I tried getting into them but I got tired of faking it LOL so I just accepted that comic books and superheroes and I will never mix.
Has a horror film ever actually scared you? Which one(s)?  I found Paranormal Activity to be a refreshing horror concept for its time and it successfully gave me the creeps, especially with the multiple endings. The sequels unsurprisingly didn't hold up the same magic but I'm very much willing to defend the first movie to my grave haha. OH Midsommar was also super freaky. I nearly refused to drive home that night because I was afraid of seeing the trees in the neighborhood suddenly pulsating.
What was the last horror movie you saw? The Menu counts as horror-ish, no?
What was the first horror movie you remember seeing? What did you think of it?  The Exorcist. I was 12 and immediately downloaded a torrent when a quick "what's the scariest movie ever" Google search led me to that movie. In hindsight, though, because I already had expectations of how scary it is, I think that sort of pre-conditioned me to be more sensitive to the jump scares and all the freaky shit that happened in the movie – so 13 years ago, I was definitely spooked.
Realistically though, I feel if I watched it again now at 25 I'd probably find some of the effects more comedic than scary, BUT one thing I'll never get over are *those* demonic images that pop up like three times across the movie. Regardless of how old I get I feel like I'll always look away from those lol.
Name a few historical figures you find interesting. Why?  I recently learned about Herbert K. Pililaau, the US soldier who fought off Korean soldiers on his own while the rest of his crew? platoon? (idk terms) had been assigned somewhere else at the time. Fucking dude kept firing until he was out of ammunition; then switched to grenades; then when he ran out of those too, ended up with knife in one hand, fist in the other to fight the best and longest he could before he was finished off; when he was found, he was surrounded by more or less 40 soldiers he managed to kill. Obviously I don't support war and this is a shitty story all around, but this scenario is straight out of a movie.
What is your favorite historical film and why?  Gone with the Wind. I have yet to understand the complexities and deeper contexts behind the Civil War and all other questions related toit; and when I say it's my favorite it's largely because of the production value and how unprecedented such a movie was to have come out at the time it did.
Do you usually enjoy historical films?  Yes, as long as they don't extremely deviate from or betray things that actually happened, especially if we're covering atrocities or human right violations.
Name a sequel film (any franchise) you like better than the first film. Why is that?  Shrek 2. It's the Shrek movie I grew up with so I'll always be biased towards it.
Which do you find most interesting: Greek, Roman, or Norse mythology? Why?  Eugh, I really dislike mythology haha.
Which tale from whichever mythology you listed above do you find most interesting?  I read Percy Jackson and that's the most I'll read as far as mythology.
Do you collect anything? What was the last item you added to that collection?  Just BTS merch. Last things that arrived were my copies of D-Day and Face, but I'm expecting my orders of Jack in the Box and Layover to arrive October latest.
Do you have any houseplants?  We do, but it's my mom who takes care of them.
How do you like your tea?  As coffee.
Who is your favorite Muppet?  Wasn't really raised on Muppets.
What is your favorite type of bird?  Penguins. < Yes.
Which streaming platform do you use the most, if any?  Spotify.
What is a skill or useful piece of knowledge you wish you’d learned sooner?  How to pack smart.
What is your favorite vampire movie?  TWILIGHT SAGA ALWAYS AND FOREVER
Your favorite fictional couple?  Chandler and Monica from Friends; Glenn and Maggie from The Walking Dead; Mark and Joanna from Two for the Road.
Do you have a favorite historical couple?  Not really, no.
Have you received any good news recently?  Nah.
Have you learned anything new recently?  I took the 16 personalities test earlier for my ~annual check-in and found out I've switched from an ESFJ to an ESTJ. No big change other than the fact that I apparently think more with my head now hah.
3 notes · View notes
Text
21/06/2024 - Friday
21h57 - Hey, hello. I, thankfully, made quite a bit of progress in my studies yesterday and today. I've been a bit more focused during them, but unfortunately a bit lazy about my meals, my daily workout (which I skipped twice), and my morning routine, which has been sloppy. It isn't common for me to be like that, so I am trying to take it lightly due to the more intensive and disciplined studies. I would study a bit on the weekend, but I may take both days to really unwind and relax. I also went out yesterday to get a couple of things I wanted and ended up buying a few pairs of shoes I had been keeping an eye on for a while. I spent quite some time out doing so, but it was worth it. I like to make sure to choose the correct thing, so when I buy things, I take my time to choose the right stuff.
A couple of days ago, I finished reading "The Double" by Dostoevsky and took the time to watch the 2014 movie adaptation. Not much to say about it, as I am no film critic, but I liked the actor chosen for the main character. I have been reading Les Miserables and rereading Dracula alongside it, but maybe I should go for some light reading as well for the next two days.
One of the things that I am worried about is going back to that automatic, mindless lifestyle that I was in, day-in and day-out, for the last three years with the job I had. I want to make sure to consolidate my routines in a certain calm and mindful way so that when I am back to work, I won't fall into this life/mind state anymore, where I felt I wasn't going anywhere. I had no energy for learning, for studying the things I liked/needed to learn, for hobbies, not even for leisure. I had the time, but not the energy. It was a genuine eye-opener for me because I had no time to even realize that I wasn't satisfied, but instead just "okay". I find this such a difficult thing to explain. I don't like to appear—to myself more than to others—naive and dreamy, and that is definitely not my point. But ending every day, when it is possible to take a glimpse of part of the picture, feeling I didn't do anything worthwhile for myself was quite frustrating. And while I am not necessarily a positive person, being able to step back like this is something I am grateful for.
I am thinking of baking some bread on the weekend; it has been quite a while since the last time I baked anything. Plus, I still need to plan my next week's menu and get the groceries for it.
I think I don't have much else to add for today. Good night.
I.
0 notes
sauntering-down · 1 year
Text
y'all ready for a weirdass dream
so i was at my old elementary school (which was functioning like a high school), and there was some kind of kindergarten entrance exam going on... but i don't think it was actually for my school. this was an exclusive private school which was inexplicably holding exams in my public elementary school. this exam, for some reason, involved a softball game, and two of the prospective students were Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, age four. they were in their typical roles of 'one popular girly-girl and one sporty tomboy'. idk, guys. but i was either helping out with the game, watching the game, or actually playing the game; it frequently varied. couldn't tell you how it ended. when it did end, though, i left the gym and proceeded into the usual School Dream™ - i couldn't find my locker or remember my combination. i knew i'd written both those things down in my agenda, but despite Erin momentarily appearing to help me search, i couldn't find the page... eventually, however, i realized that info was on my schedule, which was also folded into my agenda.
despite this struggle, i never actually went to my locker. i'd spent most of my school day at the softball exam and i was starving - i had one more class left and it was one i'd already missed once recently, but i was so damn hungry... so i skipped it and went down another hall to Cafeteria 2. it was not the ACTUAL cafeteria, but one in the hallway and also next door to the real thing. also, here's a helpful annotated screenshot of my elementary school circa 2001:
Tumblr media
so i was trying to get my food, which turned out to be a massive ordeal even though Cafeteria 2 had a super limited menu. the woman working there was impatiently rattling off my options in an extremely thick accent and every time i was like 'um, can you slow down a little?!' she got angry and just went faster. i did eventually hear her say 'egg salad' though and i was like fine, egg salad sandwich, that works. she started putting my sandwich together, going down this long line of ingredients that reminded me of a Subway, and then... she abruptly vanished into thin air right in front of my eyes. i was like ????? and went over to the other woman working there, told her the person making my sandwich had literally disappeared and i wouldn't mind so much, except i'd already paid. so this other woman went and finished my lunch, which was... not an egg salad sandwich. one compartment of the tray had a bunch of tiny sausages and a beaded skewer for eating them?? idk. i was so hungry i didn't care; i sat down with my tray and started eating. there were a few other people in Cafeteria 2, and also some kind of foreign film being projected onto the wall.
my sixth-grade teacher Mr. I walked into the room then, spotted me, and came over. we said hello, chatted a bit, and he asked if i could do him a favor - he needed a ride to a place called 'Eufala Hill' or something like that. i was like eh, why not, but i need REALLY good directions as i'm terrible with them otherwise. he said that was fine, i'd actually been to the place a long time ago, i just didn't remember... didn't think anything of that in the dream, but considering how the rest of the thing played out, it's kinda sinister now lol. so i agreed to meet him here at 7 tomorrow morning, wrote it down in my notebook so i'd remember, and he left. i started paying attention to the film then and found the English subtitles were accompanied by a second set of subtitles, above or below or sometimes laid over the originals, and they were all hilariously weird and dirty. we were all losing our shit laughing about it. the teacher supervising figured out the kids projecting the film from the booth behind Cafeteria 2 were doing it, and we all thought they'd get in trouble... but she was like 'okay, we've got half an hour of school left and i don't care, amuse me' and they had the green light to continue.
things got weird after that. at some point the boy next to me noticed it was getting awfully late and we should've been dismissed by now, but evidently there was a lockdown, so we just shrugged and kept watching the film. and then someone else went 'hey, it's 10:30 pm?????' and i checked the clock and yep, 10:30. i wasn't happy about being stuck at school so late, i needed to get home and sleep since i had to be back early tomorrow... and i had something else to do at midnight, because apparently i'd been a witch this entire time and my coven was holding a ceremony. k. the other students were beginning to get restless too, there were kids gathering in the halls and discussing whether or not to leave on their own. this other girl and i finally decided to go up to the front entrance and see what was going on.
we couldn't get there, though. someone had erected a massive barrier at the end of the corridor leading to the front wing on the building. a woman (inexplicably wearing a frilly nightgown) was there, angrily berating anyone who asked to leave, saying we had to stay and to get over it. when this other girl and i approached, though, she got really snide with us, going, "oh, you're the hacktivists. you can leave." idk if she was being sarcastic or not, because we promptly scrambled over the barrier... well, the other girl did. at this point, i was floating for no apparent reason; i just floated over lol. we ran to the front doors. they were locked, and as the other girl unlocked them, i looked up and noticed there was one of those 'pull to activate fire alarm' handles WAY up on the wall, almost at the ceiling. i guess i figured the panic might get the other kids to either rush the barrier and destroy it, or else they'd cheat and go out the windows and all the other doors lol. floated up there and pulled it just as the doors opened - i dropped something in the process but didn't look for it, just ran outside with the other girl.
right outside the doors was another hallway, but it was sort of a covered walkway more than anything? it was walled in, except with a bunch of large holes serving as windows... anyway, the girl and i ran along the front of the building. we got all the way down to the end where the library was, and suddenly WATER. the grass and parking lot had turned into a very large pond with a whole-ass marina. there were a ton of docks jutting out from the covered walkway. the other girl was way ahead of me now and just before turning the corner and getting out of sight, she called back that i'd dropped my car keys AND my slime, and don't forget i'd painted my slime pink!
now i had a problem - i needed my keys, but i'd dropped them by the front doors, and if my fire alarm idea worked, it would be a massive rush there right now. i had no choice but to go back. as i did, i found there was nobody outside - apparently my idea didn't work - and i didn't have to go back in, thankfully, as my slime (a little green blob with a face, like in Terraria, splattered with pink paint) had slipped out and was hopping down the hallway with my keys, which was more of a key card, but whatever. i grabbed them both and turned back around and ran.
so, back at the 'marina', i started looking closely at all the docks i passed because the leader of my coven had apparently left a note for me on one of them. i finally found it, but it wasn't readable unless i got into the water, so i did. it was sort of an invitation to that midnight event, which was about a girl named Marianna - maybe she was joining us? idk. there were a few other small pieces of paper stuck to the first. one was a tiny post-it-note-sized piece which i originally thought was an RSVP... but when i read it, i found out the leader knew i'd maybe left the coven or was doing something i shouldn't by attending this school? i'm not really sure, but she gave me a list of options - they were all basically 'stay' or 'go' dressed up in different words. if i left i was supposedly 'forsaking the language of my father' or something. as i was reading, a man emerged from the water next to me - literally emerged, as in he was created from the water - and climbed up onto the dock. i was going to ask him if he had any idea where the hell i'd parked, because i didn't want to think about my coven or anything now, i didn't want to leave but also there was some serious fuckery going on at my school and maybe i should handle that... anyway, i really just wanted to go home and get some rest at that point. the man didn't answer me and i think i woke up right about then.
1 note · View note
mjolnir-steve · 3 years
Text
Foolish
Frank Adler x fem!Reader
Word count: 5027 (oop)
Warnings: light drinking, very brief mention of suicide, some cursing, smut (18+ ONLY!!!), unprotected sex (m/f) ... Please let me know if I missed anything!
A/N: Hi, y’all! Here’s my entry for @stargazingfangirl18 and @navybrat817’s Shameless Hoes for Chris Challenge!!!! I haven’t written smut in a LONG time, so please be gentle with me LOL. Here’s what I got:
Frank Adler
“I didn’t like the way he was looking at you.”
Breeding / mutual pining 🥴
I’d like to dedicate this to @rodrikstark for always sharing the Frank Adler feels and @sparkledfirecracker for bullying me (with love) into finishing this. ❤️
If you like this fic, please comment and reblog!!! I hope you enjoy. :)
Fridays never seemed to come soon enough. You looked forward to the beginning of the weekend as much as the next person, but over the last few months, Friday nights took on new meaning for you. You moved to the trailer park a little less than a year ago, wanting to buy a small place of your own and start making a home for yourself. It wasn’t perfect, but it wasn’t expensive, and it was only a ten-minute drive from your office where you’d just secured a promotion. Roberta, the manager, helped you make it feel like home right away, insisting on going with you to pick out paint samples and providing copies of menus for the best take-out in the area.
Before long, Roberta introduced you to the trailer park’s resident certified genius, Mary Adler. Mary and Roberta spent Saturday mornings with you when you were free, which unfortunately, was pretty much all the time. You played games, sang karaoke, and even let Mary’s one-eyed cat Fred come over. He took a liking to your swinging chair in the living room, and if Mary couldn’t find him at home, odds were he somehow squeezed through your window and ended up in that chair. 
Another two months had passed, though, before you met Mary’s uncle and guardian, Frank. You came to learn that Mary stayed with Roberta every Friday night because “Frank needs time to be an adult” and she was not allowed to come back to the house until noon on Saturdays. This information made you feel like Frank must be some kind of sad, perpetual fuckboy. You were right about the sad part, not so much about the latter. One morning while Mary played with your watercolors, Roberta let slip - ironically over a cup of tea - that Frank did have the occasional hookup, but usually, he drank himself sleepy on Friday nights and just needed the time to himself. He worked himself to the bone as a boat mechanic, often late into the night because it was too hot to do some jobs during the day. Frank took Mary in when she was just a baby after his sister, her mother, tragically committed suicide. He spent the majority of his scarce free time with Mary, so when Mary was still a toddler, Roberta offered the Friday night deal. Frank countered that he would do any repairs in the trailer park for free, but she refused to let him do that work without pay, saying he deserved to have a life, too. 
She also informed you that Frank was a former philosophy professor, single, and very attractive, especially if you were into the rugged thing. You rolled your eyes with an amused exhale and took another sip of your tea. You’d be lying if you said your interest wasn’t piqued. Mary then shouted over her shoulder, confirming that she’d been listening to your entire conversation, “Frank is great, but he’s a grump. Good luck cracking that egg.” You snorted, nearly spitting out your tea, and she went back to reading your color theory book to Fred.
With that, you heard a sharp rap at the door. You set your tea down on the kitchen table, curious who your visitor might be. You didn’t know anyone else in the trailer park, or in town, really. You opened the door, taking in the sight of possibly - no, definitely - the most handsome man you’d ever seen. You quickly guessed it was Frank, judging by the grease smeared on his quite large hands. His eyes, though tired, had the same bright look as Mary’s, and he had the most perfectly imperfect fluffy hair and overgrown stubble.
“Good morning,” he said with a sweet, closed-mouthed smile. “Is Mary here?”
You had to remind yourself to breathe. Stammering, you opened the door wider, gesturing inside. “Hi, y-yes. She is!” Why am I like this? “She’s just painting with Fred. Please, come in.” You moved aside so he could fit his broad shoulders through the doorframe and then held out your hand. “You must be Frank. I’m Y/N. Mary is just wonderful.” You smiled at him, feeling the heat rise in your cheeks.
He took your hand in both of his, gentler than you’d expected. “I’m sorry. Yes, I’m Frank. It’s great to meet you, finally.” He smiled wide for the first time and you were certain you’d pass out. Who LOOKS like this? “And thank you, she really is wonderful. I couldn’t do it without Roberta. She’s family.” He smiled and waved at Roberta, who was looking at you over the lip of her mug.
Mary didn’t even bother to turn around and face Frank. “What are you doing here, Frank? It’s only 11. I have a whole ‘nother hour with my friends.” You tried to keep your laugh quiet, covering your mouth with your hand and shaking your head.
“Well, excuse me for thinking you might like to go out on the boat with me this morning. I guess I’ll go by myself.”
Mary jumped up from the floor, scrambling to clean up your paints and books. “Can Y/N and Roberta come?”
Frank crouched down to meet Mary’s eyes. “Of course they can, if they’d like.” He looked back at you over his shoulder, trying to gauge your interest, then turning back to his niece. “But do you remember what I told you?”
You could see that Mary was making a conscious effort not to roll her eyes. “You told me that my adult friends have adult lives that include adult responsibilities, and they might not always be available to spend time with me.”
“And?” he looked at her expectantly.
“And I need to invite them to do things without assuming they will do them.” She couldn’t hold back her eye roll any longer, but she made sure not to let Frank see. “Roberta, Y/N, would you both like to join us on the boat today?”
You were amazed by the exchange taking place in front of you, able to see where some of Mary’s brains and tenacity came from. The conversation between the two flowed so easily, playful yet intelligent. It was clear that Frank treated Mary not as a child, but as a person, and you chided yourself internally for thinking that was kinda hot. 
Shaking yourself out of your mildly inappropriate thoughts, you responded. “I’d love to come, Mary.” You smiled at her, bending over to help her pick up the last of the paints from the floor. “Roberta?”
Roberta gave you a look and you just knew she planned this somehow. “I actually do have some of those adult responsibilities to handle today, but thank you for inviting me.” You sent a glare in her direction, quick but no less scathing. “Maybe next time.” She winked at you before washing out her mug and saying her goodbyes.
You spent the whole rest of the day and night with Frank and Mary, doing everything from building sandcastles to cooking dinner together. Mary eventually fell asleep in your lap as you were watching Oliver & Company, Frank’s favorite Disney film that had become Mary’s, too. “An underrated classic,” they told you in unison.
You helped Frank put Mary to bed, a task made easier after such a tiring day. “I guess I should get going.” You stood awkwardly in the small kitchen, unsure of yourself and painfully aware of how close your hand was to Frank’s resting on the counter.
“Yeah, I have a job early in the morning.” He looked down at his shoes, unable to look you in the eye, and you wondered if he hadn’t found your company as enjoyable as you’d found his.
“Listen, I don’t know if you’ve been to Ferg’s? The little bar down the road? I go every Friday night just to relax and have a few beers. Maybe you’d like to come with me next weekend?”
Is he asking me on a date? You could feel your heartbeat racing. The look on your face must not have matched the excitement you felt at the prospect of spending time alone with the dreamy, kind, sarcastic man in front of you. 
He felt like an idiot when you hesitated to answer. He clearly read everything wrong. He had to fix this. “It’s a good place to meet people, you know? I know you’re fairly new to the area, so if you’re looking for more local friends, it’s a good place to start.” He winced, hoping you couldn’t sense his embarrassment at thinking that you would want to go on a date with him.
You swallowed, trying not to let your disappointment show outwardly. Of course he’s not interested in me. Stupid. “Oh, yeah! That would be great, Frank. What time?”
Frank let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding, relieved that you didn’t seem offended by his offer. “How’s 7? I’ll pick you up? We can walk over together.”
And that’s how Fridays came to mean so much to you. Almost every Friday for the last six months, Frank met you at your door and you walked to Ferg’s together. Frank told you it would be a good place to make new friends, but you paid no mind to the other patrons. You only had eyes for each other, yet neither of you could see it, even though Roberta pointed out (repeatedly) that neither of you had taken anyone else home in all that time.
The more time you spent with Frank, the more certain you were that God was real and your life was His favorite trainwreck reality TV series. Even if you could have customized a dream man Build-A-Bear style, Frank still would blow your creation out of the water. He was smart and funny, not to mention an adoring parent to Mary, to whom you grew more attached each day. He was kind and thoughtful, talented and hard-working. Although he was a grouch, as Mary would say, he always was sweet to you. He took a genuine interest in anything you had to say, whether you were venting about work or filling him on the latest episode of whatever show you were binging. He was ridiculously sexy without even trying. All those hours he spent doing manual labor in the sun did wonders for his physique. You’d only seen him completely shirtless on one occasion, and the image of him with sweat dripping down his chest was burned into your memory, fueling your late-night thots and causing you to break out your vibrator on what was now a regular basis.
Six months had come and gone in the blink of an eye, and you’d begun to accept that Frank didn’t want to be anything more than friends with you. You decided tonight was as good a night as any to talk to someone new, to start letting go of your unrequited feelings. 
You swapped out your usual jeans for a sundress, t-shirt bra for a push-up, and lip balm for lipstick. Putting your phone and some cash in a wristlet, you considered wearing your new strappy sandals. The walk to Ferg’s was about five minutes each way down a sandy road, though, and memories of the sticky floor inside aided your preferred pair of Converse in their victory for the night. 
Just as you finished tying your shoes, you heard a knock at the door. You adjusted your cleavage and fluffed your hair a final time with one last look in the mirror. Here goes.
Frank felt like he had the wind knocked out of him in the best possible way. He suddenly felt entirely underdressed in his aloha shirt, even though it was his go-to for nights out of the house. He’d never seen you dressed so nicely when you weren’t going to work. 
You were the kind of beautiful that didn’t require makeup. Your natural hair always framed your face perfectly, even if you didn’t think so. He thought you were adorable when you were concentrating on something, blowing your hair out of your face with a huff. Visions of your soft curves made their way into Frank’s dreams on more than one occasion. He had seen you in your swimsuit several times, sunbathing with Roberta and swimming with Mary at the beach. It wasn’t even all that revealing, but it accentuated your figure in ways that forced Frank into needing a cold shower or two. Above all, though, he admired your heart. You’d allowed Mary into your life without hesitation, spending time with her because you wanted to and allowing her to ask all those questions that Frank just wouldn’t be able to answer. It killed him that you didn’t see him the way he saw you, a perfect partner for him and a worthy maternal figure for Mary.
“Frank? You okay?” Your concerned voice shook him out of his thoughts, prompting him to close his mouth which apparently had opened wide in astonishment when you stood in the doorway.
“Yeah, um... You look…” He looked a little confused, his brow furrowed and lips pursed. “Why are you all dolled up? It’s only Ferg’s.” He wished he could’ve kicked himself in the teeth when your face fell at his question. He rubbed a hand over his face. “Shit. Let me try that again,” he nearly begged, running up to you to stop you from going back inside. “You look really nice, honey.” He ran his calloused hand up your forearm, but quickly returned it to his side when he realized what he’d done. “Is it a special occasion, though? Should I change?”
You gave him a watery smile, given that you were three seconds from slamming the door in his face and crying. “That’s better. Thank you.” You lightly pushed at his shoulder, trying and failing to ignore the electricity you felt at the contact. “No occasion, though. Just thought maybe it was about time I actually introduced myself to someone new.” 
You couldn’t quite read his reaction. Little did you know he was certain he just felt his heart physically crack in his chest. “What do you mean?”
The two of you started walking, the tension between you thickening the very air you breathed. “Well, when you first invited me to Ferg’s, you said maybe I’d get to know some other people in the area, right? But we’re always with each other. I’m sure you’re itching to talk to someone other than me. I don’t want to hold you back.”
“Ah. Gotcha.” Frank abruptly reverted to the quiet, distant state he usually occupied before he met you. He sped up a bit, walking ahead of you and desperately attempting to school his features before you caught up with him.
Frank practically ran to the restroom, not slowing down even to hold the door open for you. You took a deep breath and rolled your shoulders, relaxing before entering the bar. Normally, whoever made it first would order drinks for you both, but Frank made it painfully clear that he had no desire to be in your company tonight. You ordered your usual, an Angry Orchard with a shot of Fireball in a tall glass. The combination tasted like apple cider, but the burn in your throat was caused by liquor rather than heat. It was strong enough to get you buzzed, but not so strong that you’d be stumbling home. You swallowed half the glass in one gulp, wanting to feel the warmth in your veins boosting your confidence as quickly as possible.
“Y/N? How are you?” You turned around, eyes meeting those of Jamie, your coworker. He leaned in for a hug and you accepted somewhat reluctantly, having interacted with him only in passing.
“Hey! I’m all right. What’s up?” You smiled at him, taking another sip of your drink. Jamie was not very subtly staring at your chest. You weren’t crazy about him, but the attention felt nice, so you allowed it.
“Not much. Just happy it’s Friday, ya know?” He looked around for a moment before returning his attention to you. “You’re usually here with that mechanic dude, right?”
You stifled a laugh thinking about how Frank would react if he heard himself referred to as “dude” by this prick. “Yeah, he’s around somewhere. We’re just-“
“-Just friends?” he finished for you with a hopeful look.
You nodded in response, looking him up and down. He was no Frank, but you couldn’t deny he was handsome. It had been so long since you’d even been kissed, and though you hated to admit it, you were touch-starved. One night couldn’t hurt, could it?
Meanwhile, Frank was splashing his face with cool water. He couldn’t believe he’d fucked up so royally. He was sure you didn’t want him how he wanted you, and now he was sure it was too late to tell you how he really felt.
He knew from the moment he saw you that he’d never get you out of his head. Roberta had been talking you up to Frank for weeks, but he wanted no part of it, mumbling something about there being “a reason why no one used matchmakers anymore.” He had no choice but to make your acquaintance when he was looking for Mary, and he’d never been so happy that Roberta could say she told him so.
Later that day at the beach, Mary approached him while you were dozing on a towel in the sand. She sat on his lap and reached for his face, using her pointer fingers to turn the straight line of his mouth up into a smile. “Roberta says you have a ‘charming’ smile, Frank. We think you should use it more.” He chuckled quietly, careful not to disturb you, and pulled Mary in close, planting a wet kiss on her cheek. She grimaced at the feeling, dramatically wiping at her face until he let her go back to reading with Fred.
The sound of the jukebox starting up cut short his reverie. He had to get out there and explain himself. Frank dried his face and hands with a paper towel before smacking his cheeks and stretching his neck back and forth to each shoulder. 
Frank exited the restroom only to find some douchebag staring at your ass as you leaned over toward the bar. He saw red when the piece of shit held out his hand behind his back while his friend slipped a twenty-dollar bill into it, seemingly winning some sort of bet.
Jamie didn’t stand a chance when Frank stormed in between the two of you. “That’s IT,” he yelled, so intense he borderline bellowed. He threw whatever cash he had in his pocket on the bar to pay for your drinks before he pulled you outside, almost getting to your door while you fought against his grip. He only stopped when you spun your body around like something out of Dancing with the Stars and jumped in front of him, forcing him to catch you.
“Jesus Christ, Y/N, what are y-”
“-What are YOU doing, Frank? What the fuck was that?” You put your feet back down on the ground but remained facing him, arms crossed over your chest.
He groaned in frustration, suddenly realizing he actually had no clue how to respond. “Fuck.”
You looked at him, tapping your foot in anticipation.
“I didn’t like the way he was looking at you.” He rubbed at his temples in the way he did when he felt a headache coming on.
“And how was he looking at me, Frank? What does it matter to you?”
“He was looking at you like you were a piece of meat and I… FUCK!”
You both turned when your neighbor opened his window. “Can you kids keep it down out here?”
You waved bashfully at the old man. “Sorry, Mr. Parker,” you said in unison.
“Come inside, Frankie.” The nickname that typically made him roll his eyes at you never had sounded sweeter, now that its use confirmed you didn’t hate him for the scene he made. You both toed off your shoes at the door before you made your way into the living room, motioning for him to sit next to you on the couch when he tried to sit in the armchair across the room.
You leaned forward, pinching his chin between your thumb and forefinger. “Now what’s going on in that sun-damaged brain of yours?”
He let out a laugh so soft you almost missed it, but you were glad you didn’t. Sitting back against the arm of the couch, you pulled a pillow into your lap and hugged it, giving Frank your full attention.
Frank cleared his throat, doing his best to accept that it was now or never. “That guy was leering at you, and it pissed me off. You deserve better, Y/N.” He pried your fingers from where they were locked around the pillow to hold your hands in his.
“If you want to meet new people, that’s great. If you don’t want to be with me, that’s a little less great, but I’d understand. He didn’t even pay for your drinks. And I th-”
You covered his mouth with one of your hands, and he knitted his brows in confusion. “You’re making it sound like it’s an option to be with you.” You were in disbelief, side-eyeing him, waiting for Ashton Kutcher to announce that you were, in fact, being Punk’d. 
The corners of his mouth lifted into the soft smile he reserved for you. It was the same one he gave you whether you were on a tangent about how “Obsessed” by Mariah Carey is “the single greatest diss track of all time” or you were helping Mary put a harness and leash on Fred “just to see how he’d do” on a walk.
“For a distinguished professor, you’re kind of a dummy, Frank.” You took his face in your hands, thrilled to be feeling his stubble against your palms. Before he could talk back to you, you kissed him, unsure how you denied yourselves such a simple yet extraordinary pleasure for so long. It only took a moment for him to relax into it, his hands removing the pillow between you before finding your waist and pulling you almost into his lap.
You deepened the kiss, threading your fingers through his hair. He pulled away first, pressing his forehead to yours. “Seems like we’re both dummies, huh?” 
You were going to ask why pulled away until you looked down to see a considerable tent forming in the front of his jeans. You laughed as he pulled you into a tight hug, one arm wrapped around you while the other hand held your face against his neck.
You kissed the side of his neck softly before leaning back to look at him. “All this time? I thought you didn’t see me this way.” You held his face, stroking his cheeks with your thumbs. “You asked me to go to Ferg’s and then said I could meet other people, so I thought that was it, you know?”
He covered your hands with his and pecked your lips softly. “Honey, I thought it was the other way around. I was trying to ask you out and you looked like you’d seen a ghost.” You giggled, spluttering a bit because tears had started falling at some point. He wiped your tears away before swiping his thumb over your bottom lip, pulling it down a bit. “We’re fools, aren’t we?”
You nodded slowly and Frank saw something wicked flash in your eyes before you took his thumb in your mouth, sucking lightly. “Jesus, honey.” His length hardened underneath you and you could feel the wetness beginning to pool in your panties, prompting you to grind down into his lap.
You released his thumb from your mouth, pressing your chest into his before kissing him again. “I think we’re only fools if we don’t take advantage of the rest of your adult time.” You removed your dress easily, returning your hands to Frank’s shoulders to push off his shirt.
He surged forward to kiss you again, working magic with his tongue against yours. You wrapped your legs around his waist and he picked you up, walking you into the bedroom. Placing you on the bed carefully, he removed your bra and panties before pulling off his boxers and jeans in one go. You thought you wanted him before, but now that you could see everything he’d been hiding under his baggy clothes, you didn’t see how you could ever let him leave your bedroom.
The next few minutes were spent exploring each other’s mouths while Frank stretched you with his fingers. You didn’t think you’d ever been so wet in your life and thought you might pass out if you didn’t feel him inside you immediately. You gave his cock a few strokes before sliding his head through your folds, coating him in your slick.
“Waitwaitwait, honey. Do you have a condom?”
“You don’t need one if you don’t want one. It’s okay.”
He looked like you just gave him tomorrow’s winning lotto numbers, taking a deep breath to steady himself before he looked at you again. “Oh, God. Are you sure?”
“Mhm. I wanna feel you. Make me yours?”
“Anything you want, honey, but if you change your mind, just tell me, okay?” He lined himself up, seconds shy of entering you for the first time.
“I figured if you were gonna be possessive of me tonight, you might as well take it the whole nine, Frankie.” You laughed as he let out an exasperated sigh. “Seriously, though, I’m clean, I’m on the pill, and I’ve wanted you for a long time.” You reached up to scratch lightly through his chest hair.
“The only thing I wanna hear right now is you moaning for me.” He drove into you harshly, but waited a moment for you to adjust once he was seated to the hilt. “So damn wet and tight for me, honey. You’re so perfect, so beautiful.” He kissed you again before he began to move, slowly but surely making you lose your mind.
He dipped his head down to take one nipple in his mouth, then the other, effectively shutting you up and emptying all thoughts from your head. He nipped at the swell of your breast, soothing the bite with his tongue. “Fuck, Frank, please!”
“Please what, honey?” He picked up his pace, fucking into you so vigorously you moved up the bed. “Tell me what you need.”
“Make me cum, Frank. Please, baby, I need it. Need you,” you cried, leaning up to bite into his shoulder, stifling your moans.
“I wanna hear you, Y/N. I wanna hear those pretty moans while I’m making this perfect pussy cum for me.” The combination of his filthy words and the sight of him sucking on his own fingers before rubbing at your clit sent you over the edge, making you scream his name over and over again for what felt like forever and not long enough.
You could tell he was close, his hips stuttering and losing their rhythm. He began to pull out, unsure if you were willing to let him finish inside you, but knowing he was too close to wait for an answer.
You hooked your legs around his waist and pulled him close, pushing him back into you. “Fill me up, Frank. I wanna feel all of you. Please give it to me,” you whimpered. His release triggered another for you, chanting each other’s names surely loud enough for the neighbors to hear. 
He stayed inside you as you both came down from your shared high, gingerly flipping you over so he laid on his back with you on his chest. He kissed the top of your head, fingers fluttering up and down your sides. 
“What’s on your mind now, Frankie?” You looked up at him through your lashes, mildly terrified of the answer.
He looked down at you with the most adoration you’d ever seen, lifting your chin so your eyes met his in the moonlight. “That wasn’t too soon, was it? You mean so much to me and to Mary. I don’t wanna mess this up. I don’t ever wanna hurt you. You’re the best thing in my life besides Mary, you know that?”
You kissed his chest before looking back up at him, smiling. “First of all, I would argue that wasn’t soon enough.” He hissed as you clenched around his still softening cock inside you.
“You’re evil.”
Winking at him, you continued tracing patterns on his chest with your fingers. “Second, that all kinda sounds like you might be in love with me, Frank Adler.”
His hands stopped moving for a second before he responded. “Would you run away if I said I am?”
“Well, I wouldn’t run away. This is my house.” You thought your heart might explode in your chest.
“I didn’t even say it, but I take it back,” he huffed, throwing his arm over his eyes.
“What if I told you I felt the same way?”
He grinned, sitting up to kiss you feverishly on your cheeks, the tip of your nose, and finally your lips. You could feel him starting to harden again inside you, leading to round two of… well, you lost count.
You ate breakfast and showered together in time for Frank to return home before Mary did, agreeing to talk more later and to hold out on Roberta for a while.
Frank stood on your doorstep, leaning in to kiss you once more. All of a sudden, you heard a familiar meow and thanked God you were dressed and not in your robe.
“Frank, what are you doing here? I thought I’d come see Y/N since I’m not supposed to come home until noon.”
You bit your tongue to keep from cackling. Frank ran a hand over his face, his blissful bubble burst. He was getting you a hotel room next weekend.
455 notes · View notes
enthusiasticharry · 4 years
Text
Lonely this Christmas
summary: you and Harry broke up earlier in the year, but at Columbia’s Christmas party you see each other again, and you both realise just how much you miss each other
author's note: ahhhh i don’t think i've ever been so excited to post one of my works as i am this one and i hope you all enjoy my baby. the reader in this is musician!yn and i have so many other ideas for the little story line, so if you'd like to hear them, please let me know!
word count: 11k of baso angst, really fluffy fluff and some of the best smut I think i’ve ever written. there’s deepthroating... face-sitting... really just the whole shebang. 
masterlist    |   please speak to me about LTC here! 
Tumblr media
You truly believed that Christmas was the best time of the year. 
You loved everything about the festive time of year. From decorating the house, to listening to the music. From spending time with your family, to cosying up on the sofa and watching Christmas films. It was a special time of year, where everyone seemed to relax and walk around with joyous looks on their faces because no matter the year they’d have, it was nearly over and it’s finally time to celebrate the best aspects of the time that had passed. 
You found yourself thankful for the year, but also thankful that it was over. This year had been one of the best, but also one of the worst years of your life. The thing that caused the year to not be the best that it could was the split you had with your long-term boyfriend. It was messy, and absolutely heartbreaking on your side and because it was such a big part of the year, it became one of the memories that you wished to ignore but you found yourself struggling too. On a brighter side, you had won your first Brit award this year for Best New Artist. It was a turning point in your career, for certain. 
One thing that you’ve never enjoyed about Christmas is parties. You would much rather stay within the walls of your own house and spend your evenings alone, but being in the industry that you are it becomes a little harder. The Columbia Christmas Party happen’s every year, but this was you first year signed to the Record Label, so the first year you had been invited. You were shocked to be invited, but found yourself to be excited and dreading the experience all at once. 
The thing that you found yourself thinking and worrying about the most was what you were going to wear. You wanted to impress everyone there, since you had found this new stardom for yourself and you had created this name for yourself which you hadn’t had before. After consulting with your stylist, you settled on a custom Gucci dress that was made for you to wear specifically to this event. The dress itself was a Christmas-green velvet material, which landed to about your mid-thigh with a square neckline. Attached to the square straps of the neckline, were tulle sleeves of the same colour that bunched at your wrists. It hugged your curves perfectly and once you’d added your black scrappy heels you really felt beautiful. Your natural features are accentuated, and you, for the first time in a long time, feel beautiful within your own skin. 
That all changed the second you walked into the party. 
You felt as though all eyes were on you, as though everyone was watching every step that you took to see what you’d do. It made you feel uncomfortable and immediately feel as though the dress you are wearing wasn’t right, it was too short and you needed to cover up. You were maybe 98% certain that they weren’t thinking about what you were wearing, but more so who you’ve just clocked eyes with. 
You knew he was going to be here, and you had prepared yourself for the inevitable, but seeing him stood there completely changed everything that you had prepared for. You both were signed to the same record label, years after the two of you had met though, so it was no surprise that he was sat at one of the tables with a group of people around him as he spoke and laughed at what they were all taking about.
You tried to ignore the pinch within your heart, but it was hard. You weren’t the one who broke it off, and if things had gone according to your plan, you would still be together right now. 
You had met Harry a few years ago, when you had first moved to London and you were bar and pub hopping, singing and hoping that you’d somehow stumble upon someone who could help you start your career. It was completely by accident that you both had met, and looking back at it quite embarrassing on your part. You were in the middle of your set when he walked in, as well as Mitch and Sarah, but you hadn’t seen them at that point. You had recently learnt how to play Sign of the Times on the piano and you had purposely brought your small keyboard out with you so you could play the song. Looking back on it, you probably wouldn’t have sung the song if you did know that he was there, but you didn’t know so you sung it. It was a little shaky at the start due to your nerves about playing the song for the first time out of the comfort of your room but you quickly found your groove, and you finished strong. Harry had later told you that, after a little bit of teasing from Mitch and Sarah, he knew that from how in awe he was of you he just had to speak to you. He walked up to you whilst you were in the middle of throwing your celebratory shot back that you always take after finishing your set and the first thing you ever said to him was, “Fuck!” 
You always thought that would be a story you’d be able to tell your grandchildren, and you both had even spoken about it, but it just hadn’t worked out. 
He seemed okay, which you were happy about. His new album had just come out, and you don’t think you’ve ever cried at a record as you did at that one. You knew it was about you, it was hard not to. All of the little hints that he left throughout his songs would blow over anyone else head, but you knew the true meaning of them and you think that’s one of the reasons you found it so emotional. He was smiling as he spoke to the people, briefly taking sips of his drink every now and then, which was only water so you wondered whether he’d drove there. You both would be flying home soon, but this would be the first time in three years that you’d be flying home alone. 
To stop yourself from crying, you quickly make you way over to the bar. After running your eyes over the cocktail menu, your eyes immediately pricked at the sight of one, and you could stop the words as they left your lips: “A cherry bomb fizz please.” 
You watched as the bartender added a cherry and some maraschino liqueur, before topping the drink off with Champagne. The drink was quite sour, but you quite liked it. It caused your lips to purse and eyebrows to widen, in a good way you must add. 
“Could never handle your alcohol, could you?” 
You could feel him before you heard him, but you didn’t want to turn around. Why he felt it okay to come up and talk to you were unsure about, but at the same time you had been hoping that he would. Why you were hoping that he would you were also unsure about, but you’re certain it had something to do with the fact that you weren’t quite over him. 
“I think you’re mistaken.” You say, taking another sip of your drink, “You were the one who could never handle your alcohol. And this is just sour.” 
He hums, as though he isn’t believing a word that you say, “If you say so, love.” 
“Love?” You say, raising your eyebrow at him whilst throwing back the rest of your drink, “Thought those days were well over.” 
“Force of habit, ‘suppose.” He shrugs, “I have a few of them when it comes to you.” 
“You grew out of them.” I shrug, “Can’t remember the last time you called me love whilst we were together.” 
He drops his eyes to the counter, and you know you’ve done what you’re supposed to. This is the first time you’ve spoken to since you broke up, and you can’t believe that it’s at a Christmas party of all places. He also had the audacity to call you love, something that you couldn’t believe he had the balls to do. The last few months of your relationship you were lucky if he even looked at you, and here he now was calling you love as though it’s totally okay to do so.
“I’ll always call you love.” He says, lifting his eyes up from the counter to look at you once more, “I’ll always care about you.” 
“Where was this five months ago?” You ask, unable to stop yourself. 
Your break up, in your opinion, came out of nowhere. You knew something had changed in your relationship, since he hardy had the time for you at the end of your time together. He’d get up in the morning and wouldn’t touch, or even kiss you. Then, when he’d come home it would be the exact same thing, he’d slip into bed and to stop yourself from feeling as though you were going to cry, you’d pretend you were asleep and hope that you’d actually fall asleep. He never told you a reason for breaking up with you, apart from that he needed space and that he couldn’t be with you. That was probably the thing that hurt you the most. He broke up with you, but you never really had a real reason why. 
“I just needed to leave.” He says, “That was my main focus.” 
You try to ignore your heart breaking all over again but it’s hard to, when it’s the only thing you can think about. 
“Why now?” You say, “Why are you doing this now?” 
“YN—”
You shake your head, “I don’t think I want to hear it. I’m going to go.” 
“Don’t—”
“—YN!” You feel an arm thrown around your shoulder, one that you immediately realise is Jeff once you register his voice and his face once you turn to him, “I haven’t seen you in months! How are you?” 
You can immediately tell that he’s drunk. From the slight slurring of his words, to the smell of alcohol on his breath as he speaks. You’re just as shocked to see him as he is to see you. 
“I’m good, Jeff, thanks.” You smile, at him, trying to push the conversation you’ve just had with his friend out of your mind, “How are you?” 
“I’m drunk.” He laughs, squeezing your shoulder slightly, “But! I’s nice to see you two together again!” 
The whole ignoring the situation doesn’t quite go to plan. Once he’s said those words you immediately draw your eyes towards Harry. You’ve never wanted to leave a conversation as much as you did this one. You look at Harry, but he isn’t looking at you. 
He gasps, “You should come over to the table! We’re all here and it’ll just be like old times.” 
“I couldn’t possibly. . .” You shake your head.
“You can!” He says, “Come on, I won’t take no for an answer! And H, hurry up with those drinks.” 
Jeff walks you away from the bar and towards the table that you noticed earlier when you noticed Harry for the first time this evening. Glenne, Mitch and Sarah are there, as well as Kid and a few other producers that you recognise from working on Harry’s album, as well as a few songs from yours also. You knew that just because you and Harry broke up you couldn’t expect the friendships that had formed because of you two to just stop altogether. 
“YN!” There’s a course of cheers and Sarah’s the first to stand up and wrap her arms around you. Out of everyone, Sarah was the person who you were closest with out of Harry’s band. She had joined Harry’s band after you and Harry had been dating for a year or so when Sarah joined the band, and you two instantly clicked and became the closest of friends. You had spoken a few times with her since you had broke up, but nothing compared to what you used to. You weren’t surprised though, she was Harry’s drummer first and your friend after — or that’s what you told yourself to make you feel slightly better. 
“Hi.” You smile, dropping down into the spare seat next to Sarah. Words are thrown around the table of glee that you’re there, as well as questions as to why you haven’t been in contact. You know they’re drunk, and you suspect that is why they’re saying all of the things they are. You were quick to fall out of the conversation as it moved onto the show that they did the day prior to celebrate the release of Harry’s album. You suppose the reason your feelings were so heightened today was due to your hearing the album for the first time yesterday and then replaying it today.
It was completely different to Harry Styles but still so Harry. You hated how his music made your feel, the sad and the happy ones, as well as all in between. Harry returned to the table shorty after clutching drinks in his hands, and under his arms. Why he didn’t just make two trips, you would never know, but it’s lucky that all the drinks made it without any spillages. 
“We were just talking about yesterday.” Glenne says, taking a sip of her drink as she does before turning towards you, “Have you heard the album, YN?” 
“You don’t have too—” Harry turns to your briefly. 
“I have.” You nod, “It’s good, a masterpiece even. You should be proud of it, H.” 
You can see his shoulder tense, and from knowing him as well as you do, you wouldn’t be surprised if his heart just sunk to the bottom of his stomach. If you’ve listened to the album, it means that you’ve heard the song that Harry hoped you hadn’t. 
“What would you say is your favourite?” 
You look directly at him as you say the next words, and you hope he listens to them, “Probably Cherry.” 
The other’s carry on talking as though you hadn’t said anything at all, but Harry doesn’t open his mouth again. He doesn’t stop looking at you though, and the way you look gorgeously defeated. A part of him wondered whether he was the one who caused you to be this way. About a month ago he asked some producers he knew that were working on your album with you how you are, and they said that you just seemed sad. It broke him to hear those words, just the words he had said to you all those months ago had broken you. Out of the blue, probably not but due to you not paying any attention, the group all move in, including you and Harry to have a reminiscent group photo.
He does open his mouth again when the group disperse to the dance floor, leaving the two of you all alone at the table.
“I’m sorry.” 
You don’t lift your eyes up from the end of the table cloth you’re messing with, an exasperated laugh leaving your lips, “What for? Breaking up with me? Taking everything from me? Or, I don’t know, using that in your song?” 
“I thought you wouldn’t mind.” 
“You thought I wouldn’t mind.” You shake your head, completely baffled at his words, “Why would you think that? I trusted you with that, and now it’s on the end of one of your songs.” 
“I’m sorry about everything, but especially that.” He says, and you can tell he’s being genuine with the look in his eyes. He looks as though he’s about to cry. 
“Why did you do it?” I asks, “You could’ve asked me. I would’ve said yes, I swear to you.” 
“I was nervous.” He says, “We didn’t leave on the best of terms, and I felt as though asking would’ve have been the best.” 
“So you decided to do it anyway?” 
“Will you forgive me, please?” He asks, and you can tell his voice is about to break, “Please.” 
“That’s it, Harry.” You say, “I don’t think I can.” 
Tumblr media
The next morning you awake with a slight hangover, which wasn’t surprising because once you’d left quickly after saying your last words to Harry, and opened a bottle of vodka that you had in your cupboard. That bottle now sits on your bedside table, three-quarters of it drunk and the cause of your hangover. You were thankful that you hadn’t gotten too drunk before you left the party, due to the wraths of paparazzi that were there as you left. You remember leaving with your head down, ignoring their calls and questions, as well as their their cameras flashed at you. You had gotten into your car, your driver had smiled at you and the second the car started moving away from the club you found yourself unable to stop the tears that streamed down your face. 
This wasn’t the first time that you’d done this since you’ve broken up with Harry, but this was certainly the worse you’ve felt since you’ve done so. Your head had its own heartbeat, and you felt as though your were stable on your feet as you trudged towards the kitchen to have some orange juice, your remedy for your hangovers to say the least. It was always something that Harry thought ahead about when you were together. If he knew that the two of you were going out he’d always stock up the fridge. The amounts of time since that you’ve gotten drunk and not had any orange juice within the house is quite atrocious and he knew from experience that they never ended well.
You drink your first glass of the drink quickly, and pour your second one before making you way back into your bedroom. Due to the amount of time you spent in LA, you had purchased your second apartment here, your first being in London. It wasn’t the nicest ever, but it was good enough for you when you were here, and something that you were thankful to have when you woke up from nights like these. 
You fall back down upon your bed and the first you think you pick up is your phone, shocked at the thousands of notifications your found on it. You’re still slightly asleep so you rub your eyes a few times before clicking upon the instagram app. The thousands of notifications are dm’s and comments upon your photos. After clicking through the notifications, you find the culprit sat with a lovely love heart emoji on Glenne’s story. 
At some point that morning, probably whilst you were growing your sorrows away with vodka, she had posted the photo of you all on her story with the caption ‘the band’s back together,’ a heart emoji and tagged you in it. All the messages were asking whether you and Harry were back together again, not because you’d ever gone public with your relationship, but Harry had gone public with your breakup in his interview with the Rolling Stones and with Zane Lowe. He was very respectful in the way that he spoke about it, which was all you ask for. You hadn’t actively gone out to watch and read what he was saying, but your manager had warned you about them before you had done some interviews and you were curious to say the least what they were about. 
In the photo you could tell that you and Harry were the only ones who were sober. Everyone else had drunken grins on their faces whilst you and Harry, to say the least, had very uncomfortable smiles across both of your lips. It annoyed you slightly that the two of you couldn’t even be in the same place anymore without having messages upon messages about whether or not you’re back together. Anyone with a brain could see that you certainly weren’t just by the expression on both of your faces. 
You weren’t annoyed, or angry that the photo had been posted because you wouldn’t have taken the photo if you didn’t want it to be posted, but you did take the photo. You were always taking photos together before the breakup, and photo booths were you speciality. It’s another thing that you had hardly done since the breakup, so it was nice to see the photo but deep down a part of you wished that it hadn’t have been taken. 
It’s all over all of the social media’s, and you decide that it’s probably best if you just put your phone down. You’re about place it on your bedside table when a notification pops up on the top of your screen, and without thinking, you tap on it, sending you straight to the messages app and to who had sent you the message.
Harry: YN? 
Why he was sending you a message in the first place, you had no idea. Why he was messaging your so early in the morning was also something that confused you even more. 
Harry: I know you’re reading this. 
Harry: Your read receipts are on. 
You curse yourself for being so click-happy when you see a notification, and more so for having your read receipts on because you know you can remove them but you don’t quite know how to. You contemplate for a few seconds what to say in your drunken, tired haze, before typing out the message: 
YN: Can I help you? 
His reply comes in a few seconds later. 
Harry: Are you free? 
YN: Why? 
Harry: Meet me at Beachwood. Usual time. 
YN: Why should I? 
Harry: Just be there. Please.
YN: I will. 
Tumblr media
When you walk down the pavement towards the Beachwood Cafe, its as though you’re doing so without actually thinking about it. When you and Harry were together — this was your place. You can’t even remember the amount of dates the two of you have had here, tucked away in the corner whilst the music played, chatting away endlessly about things that popped into each of your minds. It got to the point that when you two were free, and managed to get to go, you had been that much that the waitresses knew your order by memory. The first time they had done it, you remember the way you both smiled sheepishly at each other and back at the waitress. 
It was decorated for Christmas. You could see a tree in the corner of the cafe, as well as lights and tinsel across the windows. If you weren’t so nervous you probably would have smiled at the sight of it. 
You push the door open and hear the familiar ding of a bell that rings whenever someone walks through, and you’re catapulted back to last year when you did the exact same thing but with a smile on your face from your excitement of seeing your boyfriend, one who you cared and loved very much. 
The low hum of Mud’s Lonely this Christmas fills the room, very apt for the current situation and you’re guessing the mood of the conversation you’re about to have. It was late, close to closing time but you and Harry found that to be the best time to come, because hardly anybody else did. 
He’s already sat at your usual table, the one in the corner because the two of you often liked to people watch. It had started off a silly game once when you were both tired and didn’t really want to talk about your lives, so you started brainstorming what other people’s were like. As much as you hated to admit it, Harry’s stories were always the better of the two of you but you didn’t mind, because you could little to the words he spoke to you for every minute for the rest of your life and you wouldn’t mind. 
He’s already gotten your drinks, you can see the two glasses upon the table in front of him. You pull out the chair, making him look up from his phone at you. You can see his features immediately soften at the sight of you stood there. 
They always used to do that. 
“I thought you weren’t coming.” You don’t reply, “I got you a peppermint hot chocolate. I know It’s one of your favourites.” 
It was one of your favourites, and you haven’t been able to have one in a while because, surprise surprise, they remind you of Harry, and the time you used to spend together. 
“Thank you.” You say, picking up the drink and taking a sip of the hot liquid, dropping it back down and looking at him directly in the eyes, “Why did you invite me here?” 
He clears his throat, and the movements of his elbows suggest he’s wiping his hands upon his trousers. 
“I want to apologise. For everything, this time.” He says, and you watch as he places his hands back upon the table, messing with the rings on his hand. He still wore the one you got him for your anniversary a year ago, “For how I acted yesterday, the day we broke up and the months before hand. I was a dick, and there’s no excuse for it, but I just hope that you accept my apology.” 
“I do.” You say, after a couple of seconds of contemplation, knowing that there was no point to having this dragged out for any longer than it already was, “I just want to know why, that’s all I want.” 
“I.” He stops and lets out a shaky breath, “I don’t know, if I’m honest with you. I was just so investing into getting the album finished, and for some reason in my mind I thought that it would be best if I was single to do that.” 
“Why would you think that?” You ask, the tears brimming on your waterline. 
“I don’t know. The second I watched you walk out of the door, and when you didn’t turn around to look again but just drove away, I knew I’d messed up.” 
“Why didn’t you say anything?” You choke back a sob, trying to be quiet to not draw attention to the two of you, “You should’ve stopped me. Explained. I love you Harry, I would have done anything to help you. You needed space, I would’ve given it to you. You needed me, I would’ve been there.” 
He drops his head, “I know.” 
“Then why didn’t you?” You suck in a breath and bite your head to stop anymore sounds from escaping, “You let me leave. You watched me leave. Why didn’t you stop me?” 
“I felt guilty. I’d just broken up with you, love, do you really think that it would’ve been a good idea for me to all of a sudden say I wanted you back?” 
Silent tears stream down your face, “You had months to, Harry. Months. You did nothing.” 
“And it’ll be the biggest regret of my life, YN, I promise you.” He says, and you can tell that he’s trying to stop himself from crying, “It will be. I’ve been a mess without you.” 
You still love Harry, and you know that you do, and you hate seeing him so upset. You believe that’s why you reach forward to take his hand in yours. 
“I have too.” 
Tumblr media
Somehow, you and Harry had been booked on the same flight home, and you managed to get seats next to each other. Spending that time next to each other was good, you believed. It gave you the opportunity to properly speak and catch each other up on everything that had happened. Harry had apologised, yet again, for everything that had happened and you had too. You gushed over his album once you had done, and that was when he invited you to the Secret London Show he was holding at the Electric Ballroom. 
That takes you to now, stood in front of your mirror looking over your outfit to make sure that it was presentable enough. You knew you had to look presentable, but it wasn’t as fancy as the Christmas party. You dressed yourself in a long sleeved black lace top, and paired it with some black jean flares and your docs. Simple, yet quite effective in the grand scheme of things.
You were nervous to say the least about what what the evening was going to hold, especially since Gemma and other people who you hadn’t seen since the two of you broke up were going to be there. You weren’t exactly prepared, and if they asked you any questions you’d have no idea about what to say, but once you had brought that up with Harry, he said to just answer with the truth, which you were going to. 
The entire way to the electric ballroom you were nervous, your heart was beating out of you chest and you felt as though you shouldn’t have been going. You thought that up until you arrived, when you walked backstage to see Harry and Gemma stood talking whilst Harry was getting ready. Once he saw you, his features rose into a smile and yours did too, and you walked over to press a kiss to his cheek in greeting. 
“YN!” You could hear the shock in Gemma’s voice as she noticed that it was you and she immediately stood up and wrapped her arms around you, “I haven’t seen you in so long. How are you?” 
“I’m okay, thanks Gem.” You smiled, pulling away and tucking some of your hair behind your ear, “How are you?” 
“I’m amazing.” She says, “I certainly didn’t expect you to be here. Are you two back together? Please tell me that you are.” 
Instead of answering straight away, you turn to look at Harry briefly. You both knew exactly what was running through your brains, and the way you both smiled at each other made that completely obvious. He nodded, and then you knew exactly what to say. 
You grin and turn back to Gemma, “Trying to.” 
“Oh, I’m so happy for you.” She wraps you in another hug, “He was a mess without you, and I know you were a mess without him. You’re soulmates. I can’t believe he even did it in the first place.” 
“I think we all couldn’t.” You laugh.
“Hey!” Harry whines from the chair beside the two of you, “I made a mistake, we all get it.” 
You and Gemma laugh and from then it’s like the past six months hadn’t happened and you were still the best of friends. That was one thing about being with Harry, you loved his family just as much as you loved him. Gemma was like a sister to you, and she was even when you broke up but you just hadn’t seen her. Anne, well she was like a second mother to you. She always made sure to make you feel included at family gatherings, and she even came to stay with you sometimes when Harry went away for a while and you couldn’t go with him. You had missed Harry the most during this time, but Anne and Gemma were two people that you had also missed more than anything. 
The majority of people make their way to where they’re watching the show soon after, but you tell Gemma that you’ll meet her on the balcony later because you wanted to have a quick word with Harry. He was in the middle of shrugging his jacket upon his shoulders when you walked through the door, and he immediately stopped his movements and turned to look at you.
He furrowed his eyebrows, “Everything okay?” 
You shrug and bite your lip, stepping for arms a few steps towards him, “Just wanted to see you.” 
You find your eyes flicking up and down his body, taking in the monochrome yellow suit he had on with a black tie. You always loved and supported Harry’s wardrobe choices, and you had missed in the time you hadn’t been with him picking them out with him. You felt as though this was an excellent choice. 
“You look amazing.” He says, taking a few steps forward so that you’re directly in front of each other. You watch as he lifts his hands up, about to place them on your waist but he stops himself and drops his arms back down. Without hesitation you grab his wrists and place them upon your waist. His eyes widen, but the second he feels your skin underneath his hand, just separated by the thin material of your lace top. 
“Thank you.” You bite your lip and wrap your fingers around his tie, lightly picking up the material, “You look so handsome, H.” 
He almost lets out a sob at your words, but he quickly stops himself and smiles at you. Without thinking, you lean forward and press your lips upon his. They feel so familiar, yet so foreign at the same time. You want to cry. You’ve dreamt of this for months, the feeling of having him this closer to you again, and from the way he wraps his arms around your back and pulls you even closer to him, so that your body is fully flushed against his. You pull away with a smile and immediately drop your head to his chest, wrapping your arms around his waist under his jacket and hugging him close to you. You finally feel a tear escape from your eye. 
“I’ve missed you so much, H.” 
“I’ve missed you too.” 
He sings the entire Fine Line album from start to finish, and from how much you’ve listened to the album you actually know the majority of the words. You sing and dance away with Gemma, posting instagram stories of the two of you, and then one of how proud you are of Harry. You don’t need to explain yourself, there certainly isn’t a need to so you do so without any hesitation. You realise you’ve missed watching him perform, the way he can entertain a crowd with his talents has always been something you’d been jealous of. You’ve done shows here and there but because your album isn’t due to be out until the start of next year, when you plan to do your first world tour, and even though you try your hardest, you don’t feel as though you’ll ever be able to work a crowd the way he does. Where Stormzy came from, you still have no idea, since you hadn’t seen him downstairs but all of a sudden he’s singing Vossi Bop with Harry and your watching with your mouth dropped open in shock as he does so. 
You and Harry make the executive decision to go to Harry’s house after the concert. It’s how you both found yourselves sat on Harry’s sofa, a glass of wine in each of your hands. You head is leant against the back of the sofa, whilst Harry’s hand leans upon the back of it, running his fingers through your hair. It’s comforting, and the smile hasn’t left your face since he started to do it. 
“You’re so beautiful.” He whispers, moving his hand from your hair to run his finger along your cheekbone, then down until he’s running it across your lips, “I can’t believe I ever pushed you away. You were my girl. I was going to marry you, I needed to marry you, still do.” 
“I’m back now.” You whisper back, lifting your hand to place on his cheek, “And I’m not going anywhere. No matter how hard you try and push me away, I’m not leaving.” 
“I don’t want you too.” He shakes his head, “I’ll never want you too again.” 
Without really thinking, you take the glass out of Harry’s hand and place both of yours upon the table in front of you, listening to the sound as glass meets glass. He leans back on the sofa with a puzzled look, immediately realising what is happening when you move to straddle his hips, placing your hands upon his shoulders to steady yourself. His hands fall upon the small of your back, his hands dragging up and down to tease your skin. 
You lean forward, moving so that your faces are inches apart. You knock his nose slightly with yours, causing his cheeks to curl upwards with a smile before you capture it with your lips.  immediately responds by kissing your back, pushing his body so that it’s placed even closer to yours if it’s physically possible. 
Without a warning you pull away from him, slipping off his lap so that you’re on your knees in front of him. His eyes never leave yours as you so, and he immediately opens his legs so that you can slip in between them, his finger running over his bottom lip as he watches you. 
“What are you doing?” He asks.
“Want to feel you.” You reply, resting your hands upon his thighs, “Want to feel you in my mouth. Can I?” 
“Go ahead, baby.” 
You feel excitement bubbling in the pit of your stomach, and with shaky hands you move to unfasten his belt, and unbutton and unzip his trousers without much struggle. He lifts his hips up so that you can manoeuvre his trousers down and off his legs, leaving him in his black boxers. You bite your lip at the sight of the tent within the flimsy material, already growing and ready for you. You feel slightly overwhelmed that after so long of waiting, and wanting him to be in front of you again, he actually is. 
“Already so hard for me, H.” You say, running your hand over the fuzz upon his bare thighs, “Have you thought about this as much as I have.” 
“I thought about it everyday.” He replies, quickly at that, “It’s etched in my brain, the sight of you on your knees for me.” 
You bite your lip as your grin, leaning to press a kiss to his stomach, just above the happy little trial that slips underneath the hem of his boxers. You feel his stomach tense underneath your lips, especially when you hook your fingers into the hem of his boxers, wiggling the material down until you can completely take it off once he’d lifted his hips again. He’s fully hard for you, and you can feel your stomach doing little flips in excitement for what is going to happen. 
Sex, as it is in most relationships, was a big part of yours and Harry’s. It’s important that couples are comfortable with each other when revealing such intimate parts of themselves, and you and Harry were. If any of of you wanted to try anything, you could do so because of how comfortable you felt with each other. Whenever the other wanted to try anything, you’d do so without any hesitation and in such a way that you both enjoyed it. You both had your kinks, and your shared ones, and over the courser of your relationship you both explored those feelings. You were just happy that even though you had spent such time away from each other, you could still feel that confidence bubbling between the two of you, and those feelings bubbling between each other. Harry made you feel a way no other human being has ever been able to, and you were thankful because you felt as though you’d never be able to find that with anyone else, and now you didn’t have to worry because you were back together. 
“You ready to take me in your mouth baby.” He says, placing his hand upon your cheek, “Ready to take me the way you used to.” 
“Always, baby.” 
Your tongue slips from between your lips and you lick a stripe up his throbbing cock, causing a low groan to escape through Harry’s lips. You can’t help but smile at the sound, knowing that you had caused that. Another groan escapes his lips once you wrap your lips around his tip completely, taking it into your mouth and you can help but giggle slightly. He smiles down at you and pulls your hair up so that it’s off of your face, making a makeshift ponytail to help move you up and down his cock. 
“Look so good with my cock in your mouth.” His tongue slips out of his mouth to wet his lips, “Always could take me so well. Show me, baby, show me how deep you can go.” 
You comply, taking him as deep as you can until you can feel him in the back of your throat. You eyes start to water, and you look up at him through your eyelashes. You hold for as long as possibly can before he lightens his touch and allows you to pull away. A string of saliva connects you two together as you and you wipe your lips with the back of your hand to remove it. 
“Can you do it again?” He asks and you sheepishly nod, flicking your eyes between his throbbing member and him a few times before wrapping your lips back around him, “Fuck, baby, no one can do this like you can. No one.” 
His words spur you on and you deep throat him as far as you possibly can before you need to gasp for air, taking a few seconds before starting to bob your head again, taking a few seconds at each time to run your tongue over his throbbing tip, collecting some of the salty pre-come that had started to bubble there. 
“So good to me.” He lets you stop for a minute, and you place your head upon his thigh so that you can catch you breath. It was almost as though he knew that you needed to take a breather. You had the slight problem of always trying to do more than you’re able too and you almost always end up loosing too much of your breath, “Even though I’m an absolute twat. You’re always so good to me.” 
“You deserve it.” You say, your throat a little coarse from your actions before. 
“I don’t.” He shakes his head, “I broke your heart.” 
You hesitate for a few seconds, “But you’re fixing it.” 
“I shouldn’t have broken it in the first place.” 
You move so that your higher up and able to place a kiss to his lips, whispering against them, “You’re fixing it.” 
He kisses you back with more passion than before, moving his hand to grip under your thighs so that he can pick you up and place your on his. His fingers tug at the hem of your lace shirt, so you detach your lips so that you can pull it over your head. He groans at the sight of your bare chest to him, your nipples hardening into stiff buds at the feeling of the cold air immediately on your skin. 
“No bra?” He presses a few open mouthed kisses to your neck, “You’ve been with me all evening, and I never even fucking noticed that you didn’t have a bra on.” 
“You used to have a special talent for noticing when I didn’t have a bra on.” You giggle, sighing slightly at the feeling of his lips on his neck, and then the subtle feeling of his teeth grazing your skin. 
“I must’ve lost my touch. But don’t worry.” He pulls away and looks you directly in the eye, “I’ll soon get it back.” 
“Of course you will.” You laugh, but he stops it with his lips. The first time you and Harry kissed, you were so nervous. You felt as though you were going to mess up and he’d never want to kiss you again. You were completely wrong, and he actually ended up saying that it was one of the best kisses of you life. You couldn’t believe his words, and since then you completely found yourself wanting his lips to be on yours. Just as they were now, his tongue slipping between your lips and the feeling always transporting the two of you to where it’s just you, and you have the time in the world to kiss as much as you want to. 
He moves his kisses down your neck, leaving sloppy ones against your skin until he was at the curve of your breast. Harry was a boob man, you knew that for a fact. As much as he loved to hold onto your ass every now and then, you always noticed that he spent the majority of his time focusing on your boobs. Whether it be sucking blemishes into the plushly skin whilst you fucked, or laying his head on them as you both calmed down from your activities, he always, without fail, focused on your boobs. 
He knew that if he attacked your nipples skilfully with his tongue, he could have your dampening your panties and clenching your thighs together so much that he couldn’t resist it. He starts by wrapping his lips around your right nipple, tugging on the flesh slightly with his lips before letting it go with a pop. 
“Fucking love your tits, love.” He sighs and you giggles slightly before gasping at the feeling of his pinching your other nipple with his fingers, “Fit in my hands, and in my mouth, so nicely.” 
You moan in response to his words and throw your head back as he wraps his lips around your other one, sucking and sending flutters all the way down to your core. You wanted him, yearned for him, and you were beginning to grown inpatient. 
“Can we go to your bedroom?” You run your fingers through his hair and pull his head back so that he’s looking at you, “Bedroom.” 
“Is that where you want it?” 
“Want it in your bed.” You say, placing your hand upon his cheek, “Our bed.” 
He stands up with you still on him, your legs wrapped around him as he carries your upstairs. You rest your head upon his shoulder so he can look over yours and direct you safely to the comforts of his bedroom. 
This place didn’t hold the best of memories from the last few months of your relationship but if you ignored that and focused on the positives, you had some of your best times in this room. It was a place where the two of you could completely be yourselves, and have a place to call yours. The pillow talk that occurred in this room was out of this world, and it was where you planned your future. One that was put on hold briefly but now seemed to be ready for the two of you again. 
“Will you strip for me?” He asks as he places your down in the room, “I want to watch you slip out of those jeans, baby.” 
You nod but at first undress him. You slip the jacket from his shoulders, skilfully loosen his tie and pull it over his head. Next is his shirt which you start to unbutton, but Harry grows impatient and rips it off, the buttons flying in all sorts of directions. 
“Harry!” 
“Oops?” He laughs, sitting down on the bed. 
You had given Harry one strip tease before, for his birthday a year ago and it had gone down a treat. You had dressed up in your fanciest lingerie, which happened to be a black set that he had bought specifically for you for your birthday with ‘Styles’ embroidered on the inside. There was something, for the both of you, that you loved about seeing his name all over your the undergarments you wore. Whenever you wore them out in public, the two of you couldn’t keep your hands off each other, as though you were hiding a naughty secret that you didn’t want anyone to know about. 
“Are you going to?” He urged, not taking his eyes off you’re, “I’m waiting.” 
“Might make you wait a little longer.” You smile, running your fingers along the hem of your jeans, “Seeing as though you left me waiting for how long?” 
“Don’t tease.” 
“Why?” You shrug, “That was your speciality, wasn’t it?” 
He had a love for teasing you, always had done. From the first time the two of you had sex, you knew he liked to tease. He liked to tease you all over, having your body withering under his touch until you couldn’t help but beg for him to touch you. You had a slight suspicion that he enjoyed hearing you beg for him, whimpering under his touch until you were crying for him to touch you. You remember that once, he had been teasing you all day whilst you had been out and about, but once you had gotten home he was teasing you so badly, overstimulating you over and over until you were crying for him to make your come. 
“Just strip, my love.” You laugh and his words and unfasten the button to your jeans, turning around so that your ass is facing him, pulling your jeans down to reveal your black lace panties to him. You’re not surprised when he smacks his hand to the flesh of your ass, causing you to turn around with a gasp.
“That wasn’t nice.” You move so that you’re straddling him again. 
“When have I ever been nice?” He raises his eyebrows, “I don’t think you want me to start now.” 
He leans forward and places his lips to yours again, his body falling back upon the bed so that you’re hovering above him. His fingers run down from the small of his back, to her ass again until he’s gripping the flesh between his fingers, quite harshly you must say so which goes straight to your core. You know that the front of your panties are ruined by your wetness, and you know for certain that Harry does also. 
“Sit on my face.” He mumbles against your lips.
“What?” You whisper back.
“Sit on my face.” He places a kiss to your jaw, “Wanna eat that pretty cunt, want to have you trembling above me.” 
You would squeeze your thighs together, but you can’t because of his body between yours. You nod your head and clamber off him, pulling your underwear down your legs quickly. You move up the bed until you’re next to his head, spreading your legs and placing your knees on either side of his head. His hands grip your thighs, dancing his fingers along your thighs. 
“Please, H.” You say, pushing his hair off of his forehead as you look down at him.
“Didn’t think you’d be begging so soon, baby.” He chuckles, pressing a few kisses upon your cheeks. 
“I’m doing no such thing.” You shake your head, “You’re just being slow.” 
He certainly isn’t being slow when he leans his head forward and starts to attack your clit with his tongue. You have to quickly lean forward also and grab the headboard to steady yourself, a moan escaping your lips as he does so. He attacks your clit quickly, and you can’t help but grind your hips forward at the feeling. He curls his hands around your thighs, stopping you from moving anymore. You cry out as he doesn’t slow down, and you pull his hair slightly. It emits a moan from him which vibrates against your clit, creeping your closer and closer to your peak.
It becomes a cycle. As you pull on his hair, more moans and groans tumble from his lips again sty your clit. He knew the more that he focused upon your clit, the closer you’d find yourself to your orgasm. He had learnt this, and he certainly hadn’t forgotten it. 
You bite your bottom lip and close your eyes, rocking your hips back and forth against his tongue. He knows your close, due to your thighs clamping around his head. He doesn’t slow down, but instead he flicks his tongue even quicker. 
“Fucking hell.” You moan, your body starting to shake as you feel your orgasm wash over you. He continues to attack your clit, coaxing you through your orgasm until you’ve finished and catching your breath. 
“You taste so fucking good.” He says, dancing his fingers upon your thigh, “Missed your taste.” 
“Fuck me, H.” You say, breathlessly.
He doesn’t hesitate. You manoeuvre yourself off of his head and lay so that you’re head is rested upon his pillow. He leans to open his bedside drawer but you stop him, grabbing his arm and pulling his back to you.
“Did you sleep with anyone else?” You ask, knowing that this could make or break whether you were going to be fucked or not at this moment.
“No.” He says, immediately shaking his head, “I didn’t. Did you?” 
You also shake your head, “I wanna feel you, H. Want you to come in me.” 
He groans without even touching you yet, or you touching him. He immediately drops his lips to yours, and you can’t help but giggle and smile into the kiss. You wrap your arms around his back and pull him closer to you. He pulls away slightly, just to grip his cock, running his thumb over his tip a few times. 
“Are you sure?” He says and you nod, threading your fingers into the curls at the nape of his neck.
“Please, H.” You nod, hips bucking towards his, “I need you.” 
“Need you too.” He kisses you again, “Always need you.” 
He leans forward, looking down between the two of you to line his cock up with your entrance. He runs the tip over your clit for a second before pushing into you. Your walls immediately envelope him, tightening around him with every inch that he moves in. You sigh against his lips, wrapping your arms around his back. He starts to move in and out of you, your walls clenching around him as he tries to find his rhythm. 
“Fuck.” You can’t help but moan that into his ear. 
“Taking me so well.” You drop your hands to rest on your pillows next to him, to which he takes your hand in his as he starts to quicken his pace, “Missed your pussy so much. Never leaving again.” 
Instead of replying, you place your lips upon his again. From the way his eyes are screwed closed, you can tell that he’s close. If it’s possible, he starts to thrust his hips harder towards you, hitting a point so deep into you that causes a whine to fall from your mouth. 
“You’re gonna come, aren’t you?” He says against your neck, moving in and out until your thighs are shaking beneath him, “Can feel you, fuck, can feel you clenching around me. Milking my cock, aren’t you?” 
You hum, “Feel so good, H. I’m so close.” 
When you do come, you see stars. You clench around him, and profanities escape your lips. The feeling is completely how you remember it. You hadn’t been completely celibate since breaking up with Harry, since you do own a little bullet vibrator that had been your friend. You had it for years before you met Harry, and you used it whenever he was away or if the two of you fancied spicing it up every now and then.
You come down from your high just as Harry is catapulted into his, coating your walls with his as does so. His body collapses on top of yours, his head rested at the side of yours. He’s still inside of you, and both of your chests are rising up at down at a quick pace. 
“Fucking hell.” He laughs, and you turn your head to look at him. He has a grin upon his face and you lean forward to kiss his dimple, “I’ve missed this. I’ve missed you.” 
“I know.” You smiled, “You’ve told me multiple times. I’ve missed you to.” 
He finally pulls out, and you immediately felt empty. You whined slightly and he moved off of you, dropping down upon the bed next to you. You take this as the opportunity to slip from your bed. Due to not having sex in a long time, you flip your legs over the edge of the bed and prepare yourself for having to take a few steps. Taking a deep breath, you stand up and waddle your way towards Harry’s bathroom, scooping up Harry’s shirt on the way. 
You know the way like the back of your hand, and it’s oddly comforting to you. Once you’re in the bathroom, you clean yourself and do your business. Once you’re satisfied, you shrug Harry’s shirt on and do up a few buttons so that you’re covering at least a bit of yourself as you do so. 
Harry’s underneath the covers as you return to his room, smiling at you with dimples and all as you walk back through the door. He’s on his side of the bed, and you clamber into yours. The feeling of having someone in bed next to you makes you happy inside. You lay upon your side, with one of your hands beneath you head and Harry copies your movement. Your faces are close, and he leans forward to place a kiss to your nose. 
You smile, “Hi.” 
“Hi, love.” 
“Are you okay?” You ask and he nods, “Do you think we’ve rushed this?” 
“No.” He’s quick to say, “I don’t think we have. We needed this. I’ve never felt closer to someone as I do to you right now.” 
“Me neither.” You smile, moving to grab his hand that was rested upon his side, “And I don’t think I will again.” 
Tumblr media
“Darling.” Harry says, pointing his finger in the air as he does so. 
Chloe hesitates for a second before letting out a, “Ding!” to say that he was right. 
It was Boxing Day, and after spending Christmas Eve and the majority of Christmas Day with your family, you had driven from your family house up to Cheshire to spend the rest of Christmas Day and Boxing Day with Harry’s family. You were all sat in the living room playing a game, sporting glasses of wine and basking in the Christmassy feeling of being together again. 
After Harry’s show on the nineteenth, and the acts that happened afterwards, you and Harry had many conversations. There was a few tears from the two of you, and the conversation got heated in some aspects but you were together again, and that was the main thing. Originally, you had decided to spend Christmas separate, without each other’s company just because it was such a sudden change and you wanted to make sure that you fully weren’t rushing into things. Then, whilst sat on the sofa after devouring your Christmas dinner, with Mud’s Lonely this Christmas playing through your speakers that you realised that you missed Harry, and a Christmas without seeing him now was a Christmas that you didn’t want in your life. 
You had contemplated surprising him and just turning up, but you felt as though that wasn’t fair on the rest of his family, and that’s why you messaged and asked him. He replied asking whether you were certain that you wanted to do this, and you said yes and he said that he’d have a cup of tea ready for you whenever you arrived. 
He did have one ready for you, and it was everything you needed to warm yourself up after the long journey. 
Anne, Gemma and Michal asked no questions to you, but you had no doubt that they had asked Harry some on your journey. Anne had welcomed you with a hug, and so did Gemma and once their prying eyes were away, Harry kissed you as though his life depended on it, pressed against the staircase of his mother’s house whilst fairy lights twinkled around them. 
Anne’s next to go, hoping that her answer of, “Sweetheart,” was at the top of the list. 
Chloe replies with, “Uh huh,” to which everyone “Ooo’s” in response at.
You’re rested upon the back of the sofa, with a flute of Champagne in your hand. Harry, in his flat-cap almost breaking your hear with how handsome he looked, turned around and pointed his finger at you. 
“Come on, now.” He says, “Be smart with this. It’s sticky stuff.” 
“Babe.” You immediately reply, knowing that was one of pet names that Harry called you the most.
People around the room laugh at Harry’s phrase of ‘sticky-stuff’ but that doesn’t mask Chloe’s exclamation of, “Ding!” followed by, “Top answer.” 
You smile at the knowledge and Harry turns to you also, holding his fist up for you to fist bump which you both laugh at. He holds his hand out and you pass him your drink, which he takes a sip of quickly before returning it to you so you can carry on playing the game. 
Michal is next, and for some bizarre reason to all of you he says, “Cutie-pie,” which certainly isn’t on the list. The room chuckles around you, and Harry says something about him “returning to the mines’’ which you all laugh at, but you specifically roll your eyes at. 
The game soon wraps up, and you have your meal. Harry sits next to you, and had his hand upon your thigh the entire way through. The table around the two of you chatted about all sorts, many of the questions being about when your music was coming out which you certainly didn’t expect. You started to feel as though your album, when it came out, wouldn’t be very complimentary of your relationship with Harry, and you were starting to regret it slightly, but you loved all of your songs and you hoped that when you showed Harry, and the world for that matter, that they would too.  
You and Harry, after the meal had finished, had offered to be on washing up duty. You had been given the task of washing up, whilst Harry dried because he felt as though his skills were better there. You let him believe that and carry on with drying all of the special Christmas cutlery that didn’t go in the dish-washer. 
Once you had finished, and you were drying your hand upon the towel, you felt hands upon your waist, more specifically, Harry’s. He place a kiss to your neck and you giggled, turning around so that upon were facing him. He immediately captures your lips with his, and you wrap your arms around your neck to steady yourself from the attack of his lips. His hands immediately again go to your waist, slipping his hand underneath the material of your jumper to rest upon your skin. Once you pull away, you look at him with a smile upon your face. 
“What was that for?” 
“What?” He shrugs, “Can’t I kiss my girlfriend?” 
“Girlfriend?” You ask, unable to hide your smile.
“Girlfriend.” He nods, “That’s what you are, aren’t you?” 
You nod your head and place another kiss to his lips, the feeling running through the two of you without really knowing how significant he really was. 
“If you want me to be. I want to be.” 
He lifts one of his hands and places it upon your cheek, running his thumb ever so delicately along your skin.
“I love you.” He says, with no hesitation in his voice, “I know I’ve been shitty, and I probably shouldn’t be saying this to you, especially not in the way that I am, but I do love you and I never stopped. I swear to you, that from now on my love for you will be the most important thing, and I won’t ever, ever make you second best again.” 
“That’s all I want.” You reply, leaning forward to place a kiss upon his lips, “I love you too.” 
With the year that you had, and the feeling as though you’d never be with this man again, you couldn’t believe that here you were with him. He was with you, and he was yours and there was no doubt in your mind that what happened earlier this year will never happen again. It was almost as though this was something that your relationship needed to grow stronger in itself, and it surely was now.
He wraps an arm around your neck and pulls you onto his chest, “I’m never letting you go again. I probably won’t let you out of my sight again.” 
“I can’t say that I’d ever complain.” 
2K notes · View notes
letarasstuff · 4 years
Text
One kind of intern
(A/N): This was requested by @greenslifestuff :) It took me a week or two because I had to interact with my friends in order to get the inspiration I needed 😅 Summary: The team gets to work with a gen z teenager. Let’s see how that goes.
Warnings: Swearing and gen z humour
Wordcount: 2k
✨Masterlist✨
___________________________________
“Team, this is (Y/N) (L/N). She will be interning for the upcoming three months alongside this team. (Y/N), these are Agents Emily Prentiss, Jennifer Jareau, David Rossi, Derek Morgan and Doctor Spencer Reid and our Technical Analyst Penelope Garcia”, Hotch introduces a teenage girl to his team like this happens every day.
“Wait Hotch, we don’t get interns. What is she going to do, no offense, but getting us coffee or what?” Morgan eyes her suspiciously. She looks like any teenager grabbed from the street. A band t-shirt, a torn pair of jeans and a cup from starbucks in her hands. Nothing you would expect to even enter a federal building.
“No offence taken, Agent Morgan. I know having an ugly pickly bitch working with professionals seems weird. It’s just I have summer break and I thought it would be a good thing on my resumé if I already interned in the FBI, because I just graduated and I wanted to go to the academy this fall. But if you wanna do a vibe check with me first, that’s fine by me. Whatever floats your boat.”
The room falls silent. Then out of all sudden everyone turns to Garcia, who puts her arms up in defense. “I don’t even know half the things she said, ask her yourself.”
That’s how the BAU gets their first contact with Gen Z culture and let me tell you it is a wild ride, so buckle up your seats, drink your tea up because we aren’t going to make any stops.
“(Y/N), I need you to come with me. We are going to the M.E. getting the latest reports from our last case”, Morgan tells her while passing her desk. In the blink of an eye the teenager is ready, putting her denim jacket with various pins and bits of patches on.
“Derek, can we get starbucks on the way back? The pumpkin spiced latte is back on their menu and I am on withdrawal. Pleaaaaaasseeee”, she looks at him with a pouty face. Morgan smiles. “Ok, under one condition: We both get one, take awesome pictures and send them to the group chat and then we act like we didn’t get them anything, but we actually buy them their usual.” He got the hang of it pretty fast. “Deal, Sis.”
While they are in the car on their way to the M.E. the agent groans. “Ugh, road work ahead.” “Uh yeah, I sure hope it does!” Morgan eyes her from the side. His whole demeanor says ‘old and confused’.
“What was that, kid?” But (Y/N) begins to laugh. “Don’t you know vines? Short dumb and funny clips people made?” It’s safe to say that this afternoon he learns to speak in vines, getting on Rossi’s nerves because nothing makes sense anymore.
“Ok, I heard you wanted to become a profiler. So I thought I would show you some old cases and then you try to figure out the profile. I’ll present them to you like I do to the team, alright?” JJ and (Y/N) sit in her office, safe from curious eyes. “As right as the law, Ma’am.” 
“Good, this is a case from several years ago. It happened here in D.C. Three men were murdered execution style in the middle of the night in an alleyway. They were all from different backgrounds. The only connection between them was that they were evicted for some form of sexual harassment or assault. The UnSub also had a signature: A shot into their groin while the men were alive.”
Unfaced by the presented facts (Y/N) pops a piece of gum into her mouth. “It do be like that.”
“What?” “I mean, it’s obviously a woman. She experienced any harassment or assault herself. She also has excess to the files, I assume she works as a paralegal, since most of them are women. Female serial killers are extremely rare, but they are better organized. The only thing left to say is good for her getting revenge.” The blonde looks at the teenager with wide eyes.
“I-I guess but you know you can’t say anything like that to Hotch, do you?” She asks concerned. “JJ, I’m dead inside, not dumb. I know this.” But the agent shrugs. “Good. Though I really want to see his face.” “Mood.”
Penelope Garcia is the closest one to relate to Gen Z culture, since a great part of her time is spent on the internet. She happily learns about all the phrases and their meanings as well as the newest trends and hypes.
“Purp is sus, I tell you”, is heard from the lair into the hallway. Spencer and Derek look at each other with concern on their faces. “Do you think they are alright or do we have to-” “IT’S A SELF REPORT I SWEAR PENNY! YOU WORK WITH PROFILERS IN GANDALF’S NAME!” Spencer’s question is answered by that.
“Baby girl, crazy girl, are you doing good? Do you need help or something?” The older one asks warily. But it’s drowned in another screaming match. “I TOLD YOU PURP WAS THE IMPOSTER BUT YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM I VENTED WHEN I DIDN’T! I WANT ALL TIKTOKS I SENT YOU BACK!” “YOU DON’T DARE TO REVOKE MY TIKTOK PRIVILEGES!” “WATCH ME GARCIA!”
“Whoa girls, what about taking a break?” Morgan tries to diffuse the situation. “Yes, I think JJ got new pictures of Henry and Emily brought cookies this morning”, Spencer adds.
The girls, who mere seconds ago were ready to jump each other's throats, look at the other one. “You get the cookies and I go to JJ, deal?” (Y/N) asks. “Deal!” Without sparing the boys another glance they run out of the lair. Their devices are still lit up. A red figure shines into their faces. ‘AMONG US’ is written underneath it. “I think we get too old for this stuff, don’t we Reid?”
Spencer always thought he was young. Of course, his mind is older, but physically he is not that old. But the intern proves him wrong. And boy is he wrong.
“Spencer, is there anything interesting to know today?” (Y/N) takes a seat on his desk, distracting the genius from his paperwork. It is a common occurrence for her to go to him to ask for a fun fact.
“Do you wanna learn something about sloths?” His knowledge (or the writer’s) on this subject is astonishingly big.
“Spill the tea, sis.” “Did you kn- What? But I don’t have tea to spill. And I don’t wanna spill anything, I-” Reid rambles in confusion.
“It’s just a saying, Spencer. There is no deeper meaning to it then ‘Tell me everything about it’. You know, it’s mostly used for gossiping, but I don’t really like to gossip. That’s why I use it in a different context. You got it?” (Y/N) explains it to him in a soft manner, knowing her generation can be complex.
“Yeah, I think I do. Thank you for telling me. I really like the phrase. It has a nice ring. What about you spill the tea about all the phrases you know and I tell you some things from my knowledge?” “I think you got yourself a teacher, genius. But now tell me about the sloths, I love them.”
A few days later Rossi catches her doing some weird moves. “Are you having a seizure or what is your problem, youngster?” Even though he tries not to show it, David took a great liking to (Y/N), thinking of her like a granddaughter. Still, most of her actions confuse the hell out of him.
“I’m practising a dance for tiktok. My friends and I worked on a choreo we wanted to film later. Come here, I can show you.” And that’s what she does in the conference room. The teenager walks him through every move of the choreo, explaining the meaning to it and how it correlates with the song.
“And then you move your arm like that. Exactly like that! You did a great job, David! Are you sure you don’t want to come with me later? We can make you your own account and name it ‘Grandpa-on-tiktok’. You can promote your books over there and it’s a way to float with the trend!”
Seeing her this excited Rossi can’t do anything but agree to the idea. Also, he secretly liked doing the dance thing. It made him feel young again.
“(Y/N), you said you graduated this summer. But your file said you are 16?” Emily asks her one boring day filled with paperwork and countless cups of coffee. “It is what it is”, she mindlessly answers, too focused on filling out the work in front of her.
“I mean yes but how?”
“Emily, smart people exist. I know, coming from me hits different, but here we are.” Finally (Y/N) puts her pen away looking at the raven haired woman.
“What are you talking about? I can’t really follow you.” The more the intern says the more confused gets Emily.
She sighs. “I don’t want to leave you on read here. I kind of am smart somehow. Apparently I was smart enough to skip a grade or two. But it’s no biggie. Many peeps do this, so I don’t sweat it.”
“Even though I feel like you are selling yourself short here, I know you are an incredibly intelligent person. Someday you will be an awesome profiler and any team will be lucky to have you. I really hope we will be the lucky team. But I’m still not sure if this is what I should say in this context.”
“Emily, you are goals. This fam is squad goals. I really hope to be a part of this someday”, (Y/N) admits. “I’m sure Hotch will do his best to get you on the team, you became a great part of it. I can’t imagine a future without you.”
Sadly Prentiss has to get used to a time without the team’s beloved intern. On her last day (Y/N) knocks at Hotch’s door.
“Hey, I wanted to say thank you. The time with you and all the others was amazing and I learned so many useful things for not only the academy but also for my daily life. I really had a glow-up here”, she says after coming in.
Hotch motions towards the chairs in front of his desk. “Take a seat, (Y/N). I got something for you. See it as a compensation for not getting paid for your internship. You really did great work and a better job than some agents, who are doing theirs for many years already but don’t know half the stuff you do. You are a valuable member to the team.”
“Wait, you speak in presence tense. I leave you all this afternoon, you know that, do you?” But the Unit Chief only gestures to a white envelope on his desk. Quickly the teenager takes it and reads it.
“Are you serious Hotchner? Because I will cry you a river if you joke”, she threatens him.
“I’m dead serious, (Y/N). Even though half of your talks are difficult to understand, the other half is twice as useful and important. Additionally to that, you are like a fresh breath of air that the team needed. That’s why a place here will be available for you as soon as you graduate from the academy. I trust you that you will pass with flying colors, I had to promise that to Strauss.”
“Of course, Hotch. I swear on my Animal Crossing Island that I will do my best and more. Thank you so much”, she leaps into his arms.
The others watch the interaction from the bullpen, pretending to not get teary eyed. Their favorite Gen Z Kid will come back to them after all.
Taglist:
Spencer Reid
@calm-and-doctor
2K notes · View notes
sunlight-moonrise · 4 years
Text
Satisfied Curiosity (Reid Imagine)
Tumblr media
Summary: Bartender!Reader does everything she can to get the cute FBI agent’s attention. 
A/N: This wasn’t suppose to be so long or late, but my mind got the best of me. Big Thanks to @spencer-reid-in-a-pool and @reidetic​​ for being amazing Betas (you guys are precious!). This story would be utterly unintelligible without them. Also thank you to everyone who showed love to my first fic. I didn’t expect for it to receive half of the attention it was given. I’m super grateful and I hope to provide more for you all. Enjoy!
Category: Smut
Content Warnings: Sexting, Oral (Male Receiving), Fingering, Penetrative Sex, Rough Sex, Degradation
Word Count: 9.1K (sorry, not sorry)
Masterlist
I’d like to think that I’m able to read people pretty well. Since working as a bartender for the past five years, I can examine an individual and have their personality down pat. Facial expressions, body language, posture, gestures. All these things are basically words to a story that I am able to put together.
My thought process was cut off when I noticed these two guys sitting at the end of the bar. I regarded them momentarily. They don’t look like the typical bar patron, their clothing a little too unseemly for a place like this. They were surveying the area as if looking for something. 
I got a side profile of the tan Hispanic man. He had dark curly hair and trimmed facial hair. He was talking lowly to the man he was sitting with, their eyes still skimming all over their surroundings. I couldn’t get a good look at the other guy since his back was to me.
They sat tall, their bodies alert to any movement. It was as if it was their first time at a bar, but I know they were not uncomfortable here. There were no jittery movements from what I can see; no telltale signs that they were nervous. They also were not paying much attention to the people around them, focusing more on random spots within the place. Weird. Are they inspectors? Nah, that can’t be. Drew always gives us a heads up when visitors come. Plus, we got checked a few weeks ago.
The two finally turned towards my direction, and I was able to see the other guy. Wow, he was hot. Like very hot. Loose brown curls sat wildly on his head, looking as if he just rolled out of bed. He had a light stubble going on, highlighting the sharpness of his jaw. Damn, I bet I’d cut myself just touching it. He had a beautiful pair of pink lips. I quickly turned my attention to his left hand, noticing the lack of a ring. No wife, good. Now I need to make sure he doesn’t have a girlfriend or fiancée waiting for him at home.
I trailed my eyes upward, noticing that he was staring at me as well. I felt my face heat up when I saw him smirk. Damn, he caught me checking him out. His companion was also looking at me expectantly. They probably have been trying to get my attention for a while now, most likely to order some drinks. I made my way towards them, smoothing my hands over my jeans.
“Evening fellas, would you like to see a menu?” I asked as I placed some napkins in front of them.
“No thanks, but my partner and I would like to ask you some questions…” said the Hispanic man with a small pause. He quickly looked at my name tag before looking back at me “…(Y/N)”
The fuck? Partners? I didn’t think they were a couple. I did a quick glance over at them. Two Alpha males in a relationship rarely ever work out. They were not physically close to one another either. Sigh, you always fall for the ones you can’t get.
I didn’t answer them, still mentally distraught over this taken man. I’m sure they took my silence as confusion because the Hispanic man went on to explain, “I’m Luke Alvez and this here is Dr. Spencer Reid,” they flashed their badges, showing me some credentials. “We’re with the FBI.” Oh. I glanced toward Dr. Reid, a smile tugging on my lips. Score, we’re back in business.
I figured I might be here for a while so I got myself comfortable. Well, as comfortable as I can get standing behind a bar. I leaned towards them, my hands resting on the bar top. “Well, in that case, fire away.”
“Have you noticed any males here who arrived by themselves? This man likely sits alone, only interacts with women. He presents himself as a charming gentleman. His head would be facing downwards if he were sitting at the bar and he would probably wear some kind of hat to shield himself,” asked Luke.
“That’s roughly 50% of my male patrons, you’ll have to be more specific.”
“Yea, I should have figured that is not much to go by.”
I turned my attention back to the doctor who has yet to say a word, noticing that he was once again looking at random spots around the bar. “Your friend here is awfully quiet.”
At my comment, Spencer finally looked at me. I am sure that time stopped as his honey-colored eyes stared deeply into my own. If it wouldn’t come off strange, I’d stared at them all day.
He eventually turned away from me, “This place has a lot of blind spots.” He pointed to one corner by the back and another near the billiards table. It took a moment for me to comprehend what he was saying since I was distracted by the sound of his voice. He could probably recite Shakespeare and I’d think it was erotica.
He continued talking, oblivious of my swooning. “The man we are looking for does not want to be seen, he’ll know where to be so that the camera can’t spot him. He’ll likely bring the woman he’s talking to there or even over there,” he pointed to another spot, this time it was a small crook partially hidden behind a wall.
“The area by the restroom entrance also has no camera at all so he’ll possibly spend some time there as well,” he finished.
“I’d think I’ll notice some creep hanging near the bathrooms all night,” I remarked. “However, we have a security room in the back if you want to look over some footage.” I pointed to a door opposite the kitchen’s entrance.
“That’ll be very useful, thanks,” Luke reached into his pocket and took out his phone. He turned to Spencer saying “I’ma call Garcia, see if she can run some facial recognition on this guy.” With that, he walked to the security room.
I focused my attention back on Spencer, hoping he’ll stay here a bit longer. “May I ask you a question?”
“You just did,” he said, the damn smirk on his face once again. Smartass. 
“Haha, I’m serious,” He didn’t say anything, which I took as my cue to continue. “What exactly does someone like you do in the FBI?”
“Someone like me?” he repeated.
“Well, you do not look like a typical agent,” I stated, and he just raised a single eyebrow at me. “Not to say that you’re probably bad at your job. I’m sure that you’re amazing at whatever it is that you do. I’d just like to know exactly what it is. Like what does your job entail…” Great, out of all times for my motor mouth to talk off, it chose this moment.
Spencer didn’t say anything and the awkward pause was killing me. I wanted to grab his gun and shoot myself in the foot. He probably thought I was insulting him. He continued to watch me as I fidgeted under his stare.
Finally, he decided to show me some mercy. “I use psychology to profile and find people,” he put it simply.
“That’s it?” I questioned.
“Pretty much,” he stated evenly, focusing his attention on the napkin in front of him. His body was slightly tenser than before, telling me that he was uncomfortable. I decided to drop the topic.
I scanned his being in an attempt to find something, anything that would allow me to continue talking to him. He beat me to it. “Which Sherlock portrayal are you a fan of?”
I was momentarily confused as to how he knew I was a fan. “Um, I started watching BBC’s Sherlock but I find the books to be much more interesting than the show. Are you a fan?”  
“Of the books, yes. I haven’t had the chance to watch any of the series or films. I always find that reading offers a better experience. That’s a nice pin you have by the way.” 
Pin? I looked down and remembered my “I am Sherlocked” pin clasped next to my name tag. Gosh, I feel like an idiot. Just when I was going to reply, I saw Luke stepping out of the security room. 
I turned back towards Spencer, who was digging his hand into his pocket. He pulled out a card and gave it to me. “The number of the precinct we are helping is on here. If you have any further information, you should contact them.”
What, no. I don’t want him to leave yet. “But what if I want to talk to you more?”
“My number is on the back.” I flipped the card around and was greeted by a ten-digit code sprawled out in blue ink.
A smile adorned my face as I looked back at him. “How did you do that?” There’s not even a pen near his hands. Unless he carries all these cards with his number on it, which I severely doubt.
“You ask a lot of questions,” he stated.
“I’m a naturally curious person.”
He paused for a moment to dart his tongue across his lips. He made sure to look into my eyes before saying “You know that curiosity killed the cat.”
“But satisfaction brought it back.”
He gave a low laugh, “Touché.”
Just then Luke walked back to us, his phone to his ear. “C’mon man. The team needs us back at the station. There’s been another victim.” 
“We’ll talk later,” Spencer said to me. My heart skipped a beat at his words. I felt like a kid who had a childhood crush.
Spencer got up and with one last glance at my direction, the two of them headed out the door.
Well, there goes the best part of my day. I’m being selfish wishing that he would have stayed behind. The man is here to find a criminal, not get his dick sucked. I folded the card and slid it into my pocket before grabbing a rag. These shot glasses aren’t going to clean themselves.
●The Next Day●
I spent the last few hours debating on whether or not I should text Spencer. I tried to distract myself with mundane activities. I watched TV, did my chores, even attempted to read a book, but nothing kept my interest. I grabbed the card that was sitting idly on my dresser, pondering on what to do.
You shouldn’t. But I’m bored and he’s cute. He’s an FBI agent for crying out loud. He got important things to do. What’s the worst that can happen? You could get arrested for obstruction of justice. Or I can get closer to him and find out more about him.
It is settled. I added Spencer’s number to my contacts and perched myself on my bed before sending a short text.
‘Hello Dr. Reid.’ I waited a minute, then two, then three, anxiously hoping for a response back. This was a bad idea, he’s probably at another bar trying to catch this guy. I should just delete his number and make myself a sandwich.
Right when I was going to do just that, my phone vibrated. I never opened my messages so fast in my life.
‘(Y/N). Is everything okay?’
A smile broke across my face as I pondered on what to send him. Should I keep everything cute and sweet? Nah. That’s boring. Should I send some salacious texts? No, he’ll probably think I am some kind of skank. Perhaps I should go for the playful persona?
I finally decided to type out a message, not wanting him to wait any longer. I don’t need him thinking that I’m in actual danger because I don’t know how to respond to a simple text.
‘I’m more than okay now that you’re here.’
I didn’t have to wait long before his next text came in. ‘Is there something that you need?’
Oh Spencer, if only you knew. However, what I want cannot be attained at the moment. I quickly typed across my keypad, ‘That’s a loaded question.’
Apparently he did not like that since his next reply was, ‘I don’t have time for this. I am working right now.’
Well shit, should I stop? Hell no, we are in too deep. Besides, he could always choose to ignore my messages instead of responding. And he did give me his number instead of just leaving me with the precinct’s. With that in mind, I typed out a text and quickly pressed send before I started second-guessing my choices again.
‘So you don’t want to talk to me?’
Again, I didn’t have to wait long for his next message to come through. ‘You should only contact me if you have information pertinent to the man we are looking for.’
That’s bullshit. Why give me your number if you didn’t want me to talk to you? ‘You said we’ll continue the conversation later. It’s later.’
‘Later, When I am not working.’ he clarified.
If I were a smart girl, I would have left this alone so that he could work peacefully. But I’m not. ‘All work and no play makes for a grumpy doctor. Don’t you want some entertainment?’
‘You’re acting childish.’
I couldn’t help but grin at his statement. If only he knew. Well, I could drop him a hint or two. ‘I’ve been compared to a brat before.’
‘I’m not surprised.’
‘I’m a glutton for punishment, agent.’
‘Do you want me to deliver?’
My breath caught in my throat. Could it be? Does Dr. Reid have a darker side to him? Or maybe I’m reading too deeply into this. I don’t care, I’m having too much fun at the possibility of this man having a more unhinged side to him. I wanted to see it. I decided to be cheeky with him, ‘You’d like that, wouldn’t you Sir.’
‘What are you trying to get at?’ One step forward and two steps back. I guess profiling and mind-reading are not one and the same if he has to ask me this. Or maybe he isn’t used to someone asking him to dick them down without outright saying they want him to dick them down.
‘I said it already, I just want to talk to you.’
It took a couple of minutes for his reply to come through. ‘We’ll talk later.’
I decided to give Spencer a break. I got what I wanted with his earlier comment. I ended everything with an ‘I’ll hold you to that,’ and put my phone down. I looked at the clock on my bedside table and saw that an hour had passed. I guess time really does fly when you’re having fun. I might as well start getting ready for work.
●●●
Four hours into my shift and the crowd near the bar was barely manageable. I’m not a big fan of working Friday evenings. I easily get annoyed with the sloppy drunks who think they could hook up with any of the workers but the tips usually make up for it at the end of the night.
I was grabbing some bottles of beer when all of a sudden I got a twisted feeling in my gut. I felt the hairs in the back of my neck stand up, and not in a good way. Call it a sixth sense, but I suspected that something was wrong, very wrong. I placed the bottles down and looked at the countless customers littered around the bar top. My eyes landed on this man who was giving off some creepy vibes.
I’d like to think I had a pretty good memory and this guy was definitely new. He was hunched over, eyes looking at the menu on the table. He was rapidly tapping his finger on top of the table, so I assumed he was feeling uneasy. Every once in a while, his head would peek up, as if he was searching the crowd for someone. He had a baseball cap on, the hat pressed tightly down on his head, his blond hair barely peeking through.  
From what I can see he was attractive enough. A full-on beard decorated his face. He had on a leather jacket and a fitted shirt; seemingly trying to give off bad boy vibes. I started making my way towards him, “Is there anything you’d like to order?”
“That depends, are you on the menu?” Ugh. Gag. If I had a dollar for every time some Casanova wannabe used that line on me, I could pay for two months of my rent. He had a smile on his face that could be charismatic but I just found it downright disturbing.
“Food and drinks only. Sorry to disappoint.”
“That’s fine sweetheart, I’ll have whatever beer y’all got on tap.” As I walked away, I could feel his eyes leering at me. Should I text Spencer? No, I dealt with creeps before, this is nothing new. 
I turned back to where Mr. Creepy Guy was previously sitting but he was no longer occupying the seat. Fuck. I took a look around the crowded pub, hoping to spot him. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you see it, I did. He was near the bathroom entrance talking to some girl who hardly looked like she could keep herself up.
Shit, I should get Spencer right now. I pondered on whether I should call him but figured that he wouldn’t be able to hear me over the volume of the crowd. I hurriedly pull my phone out of my pocket, trying my best to send the message as fast as my shaky hands can manage.
‘I’m pretty sure the man you’re looking for is here. You should bring some officers ASAP.’
Come on, Come on, Come on, have your cell on you. My phone vibrated, alerting me of a message. Oh thank god yes. ‘Are you serious?’ it read.
What the? Does he think I’m pranking him or something? I angrily typed on my screen, ‘This isn’t exactly something I will joke about Spencer.’
‘We’ll be there soon’ came his simple response. Okay, good. Now I just need to make sure that this guy doesn’t try to escape.
I looked back up and saw Mr. Creepy Guy still near the restrooms. One of his hands was holding on to the girl’s arm and I just knew he was trying to get her out of here. Spencer and company won’t arrive fast enough. I have to do something to make him stay longer.
I turned to my co-bartender, Manny, “I am going to take a 10 minute break.” I didn’t give him a chance to respond before I opened the small door dividing us from the crowd and made my way to Mr. Creepy Guy.
Once I got to the two of them, I spewed the first thing that came to mind, “Uh, excuse me. You um, forgot your drink. You know, the beer. That you ordered. At the bar earlier. About 10 minutes ago.” God, I looked like an idiot, but I couldn’t risk saying something that made him apprehensive.
Mr. Creepy guy sneered at me, “Yeah. I didn’t want it anymore.” Well, who shit in your cereal, mister. Oh right, that would be me. I gotta keep him a bit more distracted.
“Well if you order something, you gotta pay for it. Bar’s policy.” He continued to glare at me upset that I was being a cockblocker. Or more appropriately a murderblocker. Realizing that I wasn’t going away soon, he pulled a bill from his pocket before throwing it at me.  Wow I wonder where his pleasant attitude disappeared to.
I turned my attention to this poor girl and noticed she wasn’t looking too good. I assumed she was drunk but she looked way off it; as if she had been drugged or something.
Fucking hell, she probably has been. She can’t stand on her own two feet and she could barely stop her eyes from drooping downwards.
“Your friend here doesn’t look too good,” I commented, my hand already going towards the arm he wasn’t currently holding on to.
“She’s fine. We were just about to leave, right Sarah?” he asked the girl. ‘Sarah’ didn’t say a word, too busy trying her best to not crash down on the floor.
“Nonsense, we can’t have you leaving in such a state, it would look bad on us,” I improvised. “We’ll give her something real quick to help sober her up.” I hastily scanned the room, spotting Hannah, one of my coworkers, a few feet away.
“Hey Hannah,” I shouted, garnering her attention. I gestured for her to come here and she started walking over. When she stood in front of us, I pried ‘Sarah’ out of Mr. Creepy Guy’s hold and gently ushered her into Hannah’s arms.
“This is Sarah and she’s not feeling all that well. Can you tell Manny to give her the Queen’s special?” Hannah instantly knew what was up. The Queen’s special is our code name for helping those who we believe are in an uncomfortable or dangerous situation. Most of the time, the person is coherent enough to ask for help, but for these kinds of scenarios we’ll have to rely on our own wits.
The two walked, or in Sarah’s case, stumbled away. Hannah managed to give Mr. Creepy Guy a glare which he openly returned in my direction. I gave him a small smile, hoping he didn’t get suspicious and try to leave.
“She’ll be right back, would you like that beer while you wait?” I asked. 
“No, you did enough,” He jeered, taking slow steps back. I could have sworn he muttered ‘fucking bitch’ as he disappeared in the crowd, no doubt hightailing it out of here.
Crap, I should follow him. At least I’ll be able to tell the cops what direction he went or what his license plate number is. I started walking to the exit, shoving my way through the sweaty mass of people.
Once I got to the door, I pushed it open feeling the cool air hit my face. I looked around, trying to see if I could find Mr. Creepy Guy but to no avail. I walked a few steps down, searching to see if he went down an alley or something.
The place was eerily quiet and my nerves were starting to get the best of me. I suddenly felt a hand roughly grab my shoulder and let out an ear-piercing scream. I whirled around, my hand already in a fist to punch the living daylight out of this person.
Right when my hand was going to make contact, a hand closed around my fist. No problem, I’ll just kick you in the shin. My leg was about to leave the ground when I heard a stern “Calm down (Y/N).”
I know that voice. For the first time, I looked up and saw that it was Spencer behind me. I never realized beforehand how easily he towered over my form. He released my hand and I leaned my body against the wall next to me. The adrenaline from earlier leaving me.
“What the fuck Spencer, a little warning next time,” I angrily shouted at him. “You could have said my name before grabbing me or just tapped my shoulder. I don’t like being manhandled.”
“I severely doubt that,” he whispered. Wait, what. “Is the man still inside?” he asked in a louder voice than before.
“Um no. That’s the reason why I came out here. I was trying to find where he went.”
“And you decided to check an alleyway.” I casted my eyes down, paying attention to a piece of gravel on the floor. The tone of voice he was using made me feel as if I was in trouble. “Do you know what kind of danger you just put yourself in?  What if it was him behind you instead of me just now?” he chastised.
“I was fighting back,” I retorted.
“And you were losing that fight. You had no weapon of any kind to help defend yourself. You are no match for a fully grown male who sees girls like you as nothing but property,” Spencer snapped.
I felt miffed that he was scolding me about my safety but a pathetic part of me was turned on as well. I decided to switch this conversation back to what was important. “He’s a Caucasian man. About 5’9 with dirty blonde hair and facial hair. He had a Salem Red Sox cap and a faux black leather jacket. Burgundy henley shirt with black washed jeans and white Adidas,” I recounted from my memory.
He recited everything word for word into his radio. “Go back inside, we’ll take care of it from here.”
“You’re fucking welcome by the way,” I sarcastically stated. Before I could blink, Spencer slammed his hands on either side of my head and was staring intently into my eyes. I felt my heart rate pick up instantly. I didn’t know whether to be scared or horny so my body decided on both.
He had a carnal look in his eyes and I felt a light shiver run down my spine. His tongue darted out, wetting his lips. It was as if it happened in slow motion, my eyes hungrily following the movement. He opened his mouth to speak and I was eagerly anticipating his words.
“Reid, come in. We need you for backup.” What the..? It was then that I noticed his comms were still on and one of his team members was trying to get his attention.
“Go back inside,” Spencer repeated, “We’ll continue this later.” Yeah fucking right. This is the third time you’ve told me this in the thirty hours I’ve known you. Nevertheless, I obeyed but it wasn’t because he told me; it was because I got paid by the hour and I was already gone for over fifteen minutes. At least that’s what I kept telling myself as I walked back inside.
I turned around to get a glimpse of his retreating form but he was already gone.
●●●
It was past midnight and I had about forty-five minutes left until my shift ended. The place was a lot emptier right now, which is pretty shocking. However, I’m guessing no one wanted to be around and get wasted when the cops were roaming about barely an hour ago.
I was pouring some shots for this couple when I felt a vibration in my pocket. I finished serving the duo before fishing my phone out, opening my messages straight away. ‘We caught the guy.’
I didn’t bother reading the name, knowing already who it was. Is it wrong of me to be a bit upset? I’m happy there’s one less criminal on the streets but I wanted to see Spencer some more.
Hmmm. There’s still a chance to make something happen, but I can’t mess it up. I quickly typed, ‘I should get a reward. I did help you catch the guy.’
I assumed that I’d have to wait a few minutes for him to respond but that was not the case. ‘And what is it that you want?’ It’s now or never.
‘You.’
I’m guessing he had his phone glued to him right now because his reply was immediate. ‘You don’t know who you’re dealing with.’
‘I’m not scared Spencer.’ If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he didn’t want me. But all the heated moments we had shared thus far had to have meant something.
‘You should be, I’m not the man that you need.’ was his reply.
I decided to be a bit cheeky, remembering that it gave me some results when I was messaging him earlier today. ‘You’re a man and I am in need, that’s more than enough for me. Save the rest for the pillow talk.’
I didn’t even get to put my phone down before his next text arrived. ‘This isn’t a good idea.’
Damn, this man is a hard nut to crack, but he has made me stubborn for him. I guess I’ll have to use my ultimate weapon.
Taking note of my surroundings, I dimmed the brightness of my phone and made sure to keep it close to my body. I don’t need any of the customers or coworkers to have a sneak peek into my secret album. I opened the app that holds all of my inappropriate photos, pondering on which one I should send to Spencer.
My eyes landed on one I took pretty recently. I’m not trying to sound conceited or anything but I looked fucking hot. It was erotic and sensual, but not overly so.
I was lying on my bed, one hand holding onto my chest while the other held the phone up. My fingers were spread apart, allowing for the taunt nipple of my left breast to peek out. The dim lighting of the lamp helped accentuate the curves of my body. The picture includes the lower half of my face, where I was biting down on my lower lip. I was wearing a white lacy thong that barely left anything for the imagination.
I quickly clicked on the photo and made it so that he’ll have to download the image before seeing it. I added the caption Warning, it’s a bit NSFW, before hitting send. Crossing my fingers, I hoped for a reply soon.
I waited and waited but my phone did not notify me of any new messages. Five minutes have passed and I was shit out of luck. Welp I tried. Now I gotta pick up my pride from the floor.
Suddenly, I felt my phone vibrate and I felt happiness immediately taking over. At first, I thought it was a text message, except the vibrations kept going and going. Realization hit me, it’s an incoming call. I grabbed it quickly, a small squeal leaving my mouth when I saw Spencer’s name appear. I accepted the call and put it towards my ear.
“Hello Dr. Reid, to what do I---“
“When does your shift end?” he interrupted. Well hot damn, no waiting around now huh.
“20 minutes,” came my simple reply.
“I’ll be outside,” and with that, he hung up the phone. Wow, I can’t believe that actually worked.
The next 20 minutes were by far the slowest time has ever went. I kept glancing at the clock, watching as each minute passed at a pain strikingly slow pace. Once it was 12:58 A.M, I already had my bag on my shoulder with my hand on the dividing door.
I made a quick mental check on the inventory I had in my purse. Wallet, check. Phone charger, check. Travel toothbrush, check. Bobby Pins, check. Condom, check. Deodorant, check. Extra panty, check. Yup, I’m ready. I’ve had too many spontaneous sleepovers to not be prepared for evenings like this.
I looked at the time and saw that it was finally 1:00 A.M. I zipped right out of here, making sure to shout my goodbyes as I made my way to the exit. Once out the door, I turned towards the corner and immediately spotted Spencer waiting for me.
I made my way towards him with the biggest smile on my face. “Hi, Spencer.”
“Get in,” he demanded.
“Why the haste?” I asked with a teasing tone behind my words.
“I’ve wasted enough time when it comes to you.” That’s a good enough reason for me. He got in the driver seat while I made my way to the passenger’s side, placing my bag on the floor near my feet.
“My house is a 20-minute drive,” I informed him. “You’ll just have to make a lef—“
“No,” he cut me off. “The hotel I am staying at is 10 minutes away from here.” And this is why I always pack the necessities.
“Alright, you’re in charge, Sir.”
Spencer didn’t respond to my little quip, choosing instead to turn the car on. Fine, play that game of yours. As soon as I put my seat belt on, he pulled out and started driving.
We’ve only been in the car for a couple of minutes before I got a bit antsy. I never did like quiet rides. I turned to him “What took you so long to get Mr. Creepy guy?”
His eyes fleetingly dashed towards my direction before focusing back on the road. “Who?”
“The man that you were looking for,” I clarified.
“We had to be sure it was him,” he stated.
“My description wasn’t enough for you.”
“It was helpful but we had to be certain. He eventually confessed to the crimes while under custody.”
“Oh,” I said. “Umm do you have a girlfriend?” A girl gotta make sure that she wasn’t becoming a homewrecker.
“A. What,” he asked. I’m pretty sure he heard me but I repeated myself anyway.
“A girlfriend. Or a boyfriend. Somebody waiting for you at home?”
“I do not. I am not in a committed relationship.”
“That’s cool. Neither am I if you’re wondering,” I said. “So did you like my picture?” Apparently, my mouth does not know when to stop. Although I must admit, I’m curious to know what he thought of it.
We stopped at a red light and he gazed at me before saying “I was with my team when I got your little message. They were wondering why I got quiet all of a sudden.” I would have laughed if he didn’t have such a dark look on his face. “I did not appreciate their curiosity as to what was going on.” The light turned green, and he started driving faster now. Do FBI agents get speedy tickets for booty calls?
“Does that mean you did not like it?”
Spencer didn’t respond and I was about to ask him something else when I realized the car was parked. Oh we’re here, that was fast. He got out and went to open my door for me.
“Wow, what a gentleman.” Still no response from him. I picked up my bag and hopped out while he closed the door behind me. He made sure to lock it before grabbing my hand and leading me to the hotel’s entrance.
I couldn’t even appreciate the interior of the place since Spencer was dragging me to the elevators. He finally spoke after pressing the button for the doors to open. “I’m giving you one more chance to turn back.”
“And miss out on the fun, no way.”
The doors to the lift opened and we stepped inside. They didn’t even close fully before he pushed me against the wall and crashed his lips against mine. Fuck, the moan that left my body was embarrassingly loud; I am sure the receptionists heard it.
I went to put my arms around Spencer’s neck but he grabbed my hands and pinned them to the wall before my fingers could even touch his shoulder.  His knee drew my legs apart, resting in between my thighs. A shudder ran through me, which caused him to tighten his hands around my wrists. I liked that he was releasing the wilder side of him; the side that he kept hidden from others.
He sucked my bottom lip between his and bit down on it. Instinctively, I opened my mouth which he took as a green light to plunge his tongue inside. It was sloppy, it was raunchy, but I loved it.
I was about to start grinding my pelvis against his knee when the elevator doors dinged open. As quickly as he came upon me, he pulled apart. Spencer grabbed my hand once again and tugged me down a hallway. After a few steps, we stopped in front of the door and he went to grab his key from his pocket.
I took the moment to admire him. He was still wearing what I assumed to be his work clothes. His hair looked even more messy than usual. I’d like to think that he was running his hands through it while debating on what to do with me. His eyes seemed darker, no longer the honey orbs I was captivated by the day prior. Nonetheless, they were still beautiful. His lips, my god those lips of his. Puffed out and more pink than normal. I just wanted to kiss him again.
Spencer opened the door to his room holding it open for me. Once we were inside, with the door fully closed this time, he pulled me into another hungry kiss. One of his hands held my face as the other landed on my waist. I dropped my purse on the floor, my hands promptly losing themselves in his hair.
My mouth immediately opened up, wanting to feel his tongue pressed alongside mine once more. He used the hand that was holding my waist to pull me closer until I was flushed against his body. I felt hot. Too hot. I wanted to rip off my clothes and his at this very moment.
Suddenly his face pulled away, much to my disappointment. We were trying to catch our breath as we looked at one another.
“I want you on your knees,” he rasped. I’d love nothing more but we wouldn’t be here if I were obedient.
“And if I say no?” I asked.
“Don’t pretend you’re some kind of bad girl because we both know that is far from the truth.”
“Your profiling skills need some work if you think I am a good girl who follows the rules.”
He tightened his grip on my waist. “I never said you were a good girl.”
“Then what am I?”
“You’re a cock hungry dirty whore who is going to get on her knees or be bent over mine. Your choice.” Well, who am I to argue against such logic. Although the idea of being spanked by him is exciting, I rather see him come undone by me. And on me.
I slowly sunk down to my knees as Spencer started removing his belt and unbuttoning his slacks. I helped him drag his pants and boxers down, low enough to unveil his hard dick. My mouth salivated at the sight of him and I pressed my thighs closer together. Maybe I am a cock hungry dirty whore.
I placed one hand on him, feeling the heated skin against my cooler palm. His dick gave a slight twitch at the difference in temperatures. I closed my hand, delighted by the fact that I couldn’t fit my whole first around his cock. Leaning forward, I placed a small tentative kiss on the head. I glanced up, seeing that he had his poker face on.
Now that wouldn’t do, I want to see Spencer Reid lose control because of me.
I pulled my hand back and brought it to my face. I licked the length of my palm before placing it at the base of his cock again. My opposite hand settled on his thigh to help balance myself. I leaned forward once more and lightly licked the tip before placing it inside my mouth. I sucked gently while firmly grasping the base. He rewarded me with a small grunt.
I moved down, slowly taking him inch by inch. I made sure to get him as wet as I can while gliding my lips against him. My hand pumped the remaining length that couldn’t fit in my mouth. He started to become more and more erect.
“You like this don’t you?” Spencer groaned out, “You’re such a filthy slut for me.” How is it possible that the sound of his voice is making me aroused? He placed his hands on my hair, fisting his fingers among the locks.
I moaned at his words, bobbing my head up and down at a faster pace. I moved my hand to cup his sac, giving him a gentle massage between my fingers. He gave out a choked sound as he started to slowly thrust his hips.
I drew back and kissed my way down his cock until my lips met my hand. I placed my mouth on one of his balls and gave one a light suck before running my tongue around it. “Fucking hell,” Spencer loudly exclaimed, as I returned the same ministrations to the neglected one.
I pulled away with a small pop and dragged my tongue from base to tip. My eyes looked up at him, and the sight was sexy as fuck. His mouth was opened as he was trying to catch his breath, his face slightly flushed. There was a light sheen of sweat on his forehead and the veins on his neck were more prominent.
I made sure Spencer’s eyes landed on mine as I wrapped my lips around his now full length. He started thrusting more earnestly this time as my hand went back to massaging his balls. I continued eye contact as I bobbed my head up and down on his cock.
He tightened his hands on my hair harshly, which made me more wet. Great, on top of being a cock whore, I am a pain whore. This man is bringing the worst out of me and I’m loving it.
I made sure to hollow my cheeks and swirl my tongue around his head every time I returned back up. I didn’t think I’d have this much fun with a cock in my mouth. Once I dipped my tongue against his slit and firmly clasped my hand over his sac, it was over for him.
Spencer took over and held my head in place as he started to thrust within me. I tried my best to maintain eye contact, despite the tears swelling up. My other hand clutched at the skin of his thigh, raking my nails over him. His groans were a sweet symphony to my ears. Just when I thought he was about to release himself, he stopped and pulled away from me.
“Why’d you stop?” I pouted, my lips feeling very sensitive as they moved against each other.
He panted heavily and loudly, “I don’t want to cum yet.” I couldn’t stop myself from smiling at the sight of him. He was a mess and it was all because of me.
“But I wanted to taste you.” My hand went back to grab him but he stopped me with a sharp tug of my hair.
“Behave or you won’t get a reward for sucking my dick so well,” he said flatly.
Ohh, I’m curious as to what a reward from Spencer Reid entails. He pulled me up and I had to place my hands on his chest for balance. As my legs were regaining feeling, he was staring at my face. I can already imagine what he sees. Tear stained face with puffy eyes and swollen lips. Apparently, he liked the sight because he pulled me into another kiss.
This one was much more tender than our previous kisses. His lips were soft, as if afraid they would irritate my already swollen ones. His hands cradled my head, gently tilting it up so he has better access. His tongue swirled against mine and I was surprised he wasn’t repulsed by his taste on me. So many guys would find this to be disturbing.
Spencer slowly pulled away from me. He looked into my eyes as he said, “I want you to strip then bend over the bed.”
“What if I don’t?” His once gentle hands on my face are now gripping my cheeks, making my lips pucker. He continued to stare at me and it took everything within me not to moan at his actions.
“I think you know what would happen if you don’t, do you really want that?” As much as I would have loved to mess with him some more, I did not want it at the expense of my orgasm. I’m too horny to be acting recklessly. 
I started stepping away from him, doing as he requested. I would have taken my time removing my clothes, but I was too impatient. As I pulled down my panties, I noticed how damp they were. This man has made me wanton and soaked without even touching me yet.
I went over to the bed, placing myself in the desired position. The bed was tall enough where my feet were still firmly on the floor but I didn’t need to bend my knees to keep my stomach flat against the mattress. 
I watched Spencer strip out of his clothes, making note of the mismatched socks he had on. Aww cute. Once he was bare, he walked up behind me and placed his hands on my hips. For a few seconds, he did nothing while I was readily anticipating his next move.
Finally, I felt his hand cup my mound and I gasped at the feeling. “You’re so wet. All of this because you had my cock in that dirty mouth of yours.” I shuddered at his words, the hairs on my arm rising up.
He started rubbing at my lower lips, spreading the arousal that has already formed all over me. “You have nothing to say now that I got my hands on you huh,” he continued, stroking his fingers against my core.
Just when I was about to say something, he sunk a single finger inside me. I inhaled sharply and buried my head into the sheets. I tried my best to move against him but the hand resting on my hip kept me at bay. He was methodical with his actions, pressing his finger against my walls as he moved in and out.
“Your pretty little cunt is taking my finger so well. You think you can handle another one?” I still couldn’t reply to him, too busy trying to even out my breathing. He then entered another finger. I moaned as he started diligently working those dexterous digits inside of me. My pussy was throbbing while he was working wonders.
A loud moan was torn out my body as Spencer’s fingers curled against my G-spot. “Oh you liked that, dirty girl,” he growled out. He curled his fingers once again and I let out an equally loud whine. He continued this every time he returned his fingers back inside of me; my throat releasing a moan whenever he did so. You’d think with all the time I spent staring at his hands that I’d be ready for him but that’s a big no.
My body was warming up and I could feel the heat pooling within me. I was a goner when a third finger entered me. He tightened his hand on my hip and I prayed that it would leave marks. I wanted to admire the bruises when this was all over.
I closed my eyes and tried to focus on the pleasure racking my body. I was so close to finding my release. The way I was pulsating around his fingers was a telltale sign that I was upon my release.
“You want to come, dirty girl, you want to come all over my hand?” he fiercely whispered. All I could do was nod against the comforters, my voice long gone by now.
I felt myself pulse and tighten around him. With just one more curl of his fingers, I was about to climax. But he suddenly pulled out and released me.
“What the fuck?” I screeched, voice coming back with a vengeance. “You said I was going to get rewarded you teasing bastard.”
“And you are. Now shut up before I change my mind.” For once, I stayed quiet, only because I really wanted an orgasm. It is the least he could do after making me all hot and bothered.
I turned my head back, wanting to see what Spencer would do next. I whimpered when I saw him put his fingers in his mouth, licking my essence off of him. I watched as he took his time, my pussy continuing to throb at the sight.
“You taste pretty good for such a whore,” he remarked once he was done. I saw him walk towards the nightstand and grab a foil packet. Excitement coursed through my veins, my body barely staying still.
He was behind me once again, and I was ready for him. I felt him rub the head against my lips, pressing down when it met my clit. He continued doing this, moving up and down against me, making sure to coat himself in my arousal. I started to wiggle my hips against him, hoping to gain some more friction.
A loud moan was torn out of my throat when Spencer suddenly grabbed my hips and buried himself inside my pussy. He let out a groan as he stilled within me. We had a moment to adjust to one another before he started rocking against me. He was hitting me deep, touching places that I didn't know were possible.  
“Spencer, you feel so fucking good,” I mewled out, enjoying the feel of his cock against my walls.
He kept a steady rhythm, making sure to pull halfway out before pushing back in. Small moans left my mouth as I tried my best to return his thrusts. His hands on my hips did not allow for much movement, reminding me that he was the one in charge of my pleasure.
My body moved rhythmically against the bed, my sensitive nipples rubbing against the sheet, adding to this blissful feeling. I was burning up from the sensations wrecking my body.
“I want you to touch yourself,” Spencer growled out. I let my hand trailed down my stomach but paused when they got to my lower abdomen. I felt a bump form at my lower abdomen every time he entered me, which only added to my desire. I tightened around him and he let out a groan before giving me a powerful thrust as a warning.
My hand continued its descent to my clit, fingers rubbing against it once they met. Spencer increased the pace, slamming his hips against my ass. My legs started to tremble, my orgasm looming over my body. My hand continued to play with my clit while the other gripped the sheets tightly. I bit down on the comforter, trying my best to quiet down my moans.
One of Spencer’s hands grabbed my hair and pulled my head up. “None of that, I want to hear you. I want everyone in this hotel to know what a filthy little bitch you are. My filthy little whore,” he grunted out.
It was all too much for me. His voice, his cock, his hands. I felt wave after wave of pleasure as my release washed over me. I cried out his name; submitting to the ecstasy my body was experiencing. My muscles went limp as I attempted to return air into my lungs.
I heard Spencer grunt as my pussy pulsed and creamed around him but that did not stop his relentless pace. “Keep touching the clit of yours, I want you to come one more time.”
“I can’t,” I whimpered. I was still recovering from the powerful orgasm I just had. I won’t be able to have another one so soon.
But Spencer Reid was nothing if not diligent. “You can and you will.”
His hand that was in my hair joined mine between my legs. His fingers were so much better than mine. He pressed firmly against my clit, keeping a steady motion against me. He snapped his hips harder, the slight pain making me feel that familiar coil in my stomach.
“I know you have one more in you for me. I want you to give it to me” he uttered. I’m not sure how he is able to do it, but I felt my body start rising again.
“Sp-Spencer. Please.” I didn’t know what I was begging for as I stammered those words out. His hand between my legs pressed harder and his rhythm against me started wavering. I knew he was close to his release, but I was right there with him.
When he pinched my clit firmly against his fingers, I mewled out his name once more. The coil snapped and I couldn’t help the way I trembled once more. My body quaked against his as the shock waves overcame me. I felt as if lightning was running across my nerves.
Spencer thrusted three more times before tensing against me. I felt him jerk and spill himself inside of me. He dropped down, pressing his chest against my back and whispering my name in my ear. We both tried to catch our breaths as we came down from our high.  
After a few minutes, Spencer pulled out of me and walked to a door which I assumed led to the bathroom. I’m guessing he went to dispose of the condom. I continued to lie on the bed, trying my best to catch my breath. My body was still on an all-time high, still reeling from the aftershocks of my climax. I fought against the drowsiness of my eyes, wondering how the hell I am going to stay alert on the cab ride home.
“How are you feeling?” I couldn’t even jump in surprise. I had no idea he returned and was standing right next to me. “I wasn’t too rough?”
“Best. Sex. Ever,” I drowsily responded. Spencer picked me up and maneuvered my body so that I was lying on my back. He grabbed a bottle that was standing on the nightstand; squeezing some cream into the palm of his hand. He rubbed his hands together and started massaging the lotion onto my legs. He focused his attention on my knees and thighs.
“Do you want some water? He asked. I nodded my head and he immediately went to the snack bar area. He grabbed a bottle and what looks to be a granola bar. He uncapped the bottle and gently fed the water to me.
“Do you want some food,” I shook my head at his question. “Is there anything else I can do for you?”
“Cuddles” came my whispered response. Spencer smiled at me before settling on the bed next to me. He draped the blankets over our bodies and wrapped his hand over my waist, pulling me close.
“Goodnight Spencer.”
“Goodnight (Y/N).”
The last thing I felt was the press of his lips against my neck as my body surrendered itself to the sweet bliss of slumber. 
2K notes · View notes
Text
Now titled, The Wild Ride. Part 2 of my newest Wildmoore AU.
Read part 1 here
As Sophie waited in The Hold Up for Ryan, she thought to herself how crazy she was for accepting a ride with a stranger, especially while being injured and then agreeing to go to some sketchy under ground clinic below a bar with said stranger. But there was something about Ryan that intrigued her. Obviously the girl had secrets but she didn’t think it was, I keep people locked in my basement, type of secrets. Plus Sophie could take care of herself if she needed to. Some years back she had started to take martial arts classes because of a near attack one of her friends had experienced while walking home one night. Her friend was alright but they both had decided after that happened that they would start taking self defense classes. She wasn’t an all world champion or anything but If she needed to defend herself she could at least put up a good fight. She carried mace, a rape whistle and a pocket knife. She didn’t think she’d ever have to use it with Ryan though, or Mary for that matter. She felt safe when she was with Ryan. Protected. 
“Hey Soph, sorry about that. You ready to go? Mine and Mary’s place is above the bar.” Ryan pointed up at the ceiling. 
“Yes, lead the way.” Sophie said. Ryan wheeled Sophie towards the elevator and they went up to the loft. 
“Wow, you guys got a great place. Loft above, bar below and hospital underground. Why would you ever need to leave?” Sophie joked. 
Ryan laughed. “Yeah it’s a great set up. Mary has her license and everything but she likes to save her skills for people who can’t afford it and the ones that society likes to shame and turn their noses up at. She’s always been that way. Helping people who can’t help themselves.” 
“Looks like you two have that in common.” Sophie said. 
Ryan blushed despite herself. “So the bathroom is down that hallway, the kitchen is over there. We have water. I can make some tea or coffee. If you’re hungry I make really good vegan pancakes. Umm we could watch a movie or something too. Do you want me to help you to the couch?” Ryan asked, trying to be a good hostess. 
“I think I got it. I’m fine really, Ryan. But I appreciate the offer.” Sophie chuckled. Sophie gingerly got up and made her way to the couch. “Come sit down.” She said to Ryan. Ryan joined Sophie on the couch.
“So.” Ryan said. 
“So.” Sophie echoed back. “Thanks for saving me.” Sophie offered. 
“Oh it’s no problem. I’m glad I was in the area.” Ryan said.
“I’m glad you were too.” Sophie said softly. “How’d you get so strong? That was honestly unbelievable strength, like superhero strength.”  Sophie pondered out loud. 
“Uh, huh, yeah, nowhere near a superhero. Just naturally strong I guess.” Ryan said. Sophie eyed her with curiosity. 
“So tell me about yourself.” Sophie said, sensing Ryan’s nerves and that she wanted to change the subject.
Ryan laughed. “What is this, a date?” She said. 
“Only if you want it to be.” Sophie said, her voice carrying a flirty edge. 
Ryan’s smirk mirrored Sophie’s own. “Well I’m getting my Masters in African American studies and I’m minoring in naturopathy. I’m also dabbling in some writing and directing of short films. Oh and I’m the manager of the bar downstairs. And I’m gay.” Ryan added on. 
“I mean the flannel was kind of a give away for me.” Sophie quipped. 
“Hey, I could be straight.” Ryan threw her hands up in the air and then let them drop down dramatically onto her thighs. 
“Yes it’s good to have a dream.” Sophie rasped out while giggling. 
“Well, I know you’re not straight either.” Ryan said stepping out on a limb. She wasn’t entirely sure of Sophie’s sexuality but the door was open for the conversation. 
“Damn. What gave me away?” Sophie said. 
“Well that raspy voice of yours for starters.” Ryan said. 
Sophie laughed. “What! How does my voice make me gay! It’s just my voice!” 
“I don’t know, but it’s a thing.” Ryan said with a shrug of her shoulders
“Ok, well that’s not much proof.” Sophie rolled her eyes good-naturedly. 
“Well, also the way you been looking at me is another dead give away.” Ryan said. 
Sophie played along. “Oh, and what way have I been looking at you Ryan, do tell.” 
Ryan regarded Sophie and then bit her lip. She raked her eyes over Sophie and looked at her lips. “You really want me to show you how you’ve been looking at me.” Ryan clenched her jaw and she watched as Sophie’s eyes dropped to Ryan’s lips. Neither of them moved closer but the energy between them was electrically charged. Suddenly the door swung open and in walked Mary. She froze when she saw both Ryan and Sophie on the couch looking a lot closer than two people who just met each other an hour ago should be looking. 
“Um, hey you two. Sorry to interrupt whatever this is.” Mary wildly gestured to the two of them. She walked over and stood by Sophie. “Is Ryan taking good care of you?” Mary asked with a glace at Ryan. 
“Yes, she’s wonderful. You both are.” Sophie said, sincerely. 
“Hey, why don’t we order some vegan delivery?” Ryan suggested, not wanting to get rid of Sophie so soon. She’d been enjoying spending time with her and hey, she did still technically have to make sure that she didn’t have any internal bleeding or a concussion. She liked spending time alone with Sophie but she had a feeling that she would get a lot more chances to spend time alone with her. Mary went into her room to take off the day and left Sophie and Ryan alone again. Well that was fast. 
“Hey Ryan, I wondered if you would like to go out with me some time. Like after I heal and everything.” Sophie said once Mary closed the door to her bedroom.
Ryan tried to hide the big smile that was threatening to take over her face. But she could not contain it. She really liked Sophie, and by the looks of it, Sophie liked her back. Ryan wondered if she could eventually tell Sophie who she was. How long could she wait to tell her the truth about herself? And if she finally told her, would Sophie be upset that Ryan lied or didn’t confide in her sooner. This was part of Ryan and if her and Sophie ended up really connecting, she would want to share that part of herself with Sophie, otherwise would Sophie really know her at all?
“Hey you ok over there? If it’s too soon, or if I misread-” Sophie began trying to backtrack. 
“No! No. Sorry. It’s not too soon, and you definitely did not misread anything. I would love to go out with you. As long as it’s not rock climbing.” Ryan laughed. 
“Hey! I’m usually very agile! I just slipped.” Sophie said crossing her arm in her defense.  
“Yeah, yeah.” Ryan said. 
Mary came back out of her room, dressed in some comfy clothes and wearing slippers. “Alright you two, time to order some hopefully delicious food because I’m starving.” 
“I’m gonna go wash up.” Sophie said as she got up to go to the bathroom. 
Once Sophie was out of ear shot Mary gave Ryan a look. “Girl” was all Mary said. But it was enough. 
“I know I know! She asked me out.” Ryan confessed. 
“What! How long was I in there?” Mary jabbed her thumb behind herself at her bedroom. 
“I said yes, obviously.” 
“Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. What are you gonna do about the whole... Bat thing.” Mary whispered the last part. 
Ryan picked up some take out menus and looked at them, trying to decide where she was going to order from. “I think I’m gonna tell her if we end up getting close. I mean, I want her to know me, and I already trust her. I mean I brought her to your illegal clinic, right.” Ryan said. 
Mary rolled her eyes. “Yeah, don’t remind me.” 
“I get good vibes from her though. I think this could turn into something. So we will see.” Ryan said as she watched Sophie walk back into the room. It was golden hour and the orange sun was beaming in through the loft windows, illuminating Sophie in an angelic glow. Ryan’s heart skipped a few beats. She looked up at the sky as if to say, really, God? This woman! Ryan was smitten, and she knew Sophie was feeling the same way, she just hoped that Sophie was prepared for the wild ride that was Ryan Wilder. 
18 notes · View notes
lavendersuh · 4 years
Text
what a feeling
johnny x fem!reader | badboy!au, too much fluff | 2.4k words
warnings: mentions of nicotine addition, alcohol
Tumblr media
based off of this moodboard and au idea created by @neo-cult-ure!! thank you luv for allowing me to play around with this au idea! I originally wrote this bc i loved the idea and just wanted to self indulge in some writing a few nights ago. I probably could’ve fleshed this out more, but i’m in the middle of exams so i probably shouldn’t even be writing fic rn haha (fair warning tho there is so much fluff help) hope u enjoy!!
~~~
“I need your help.”
Haechan looks up to see an unexpected face peering over him. It wasn’t every day that resident bad boy Johnny Suh was asking a drama student for something. While the two of them ran around in slightly similar circles due to their mutual acquaintances, Haechan can’t remember the last time he spoke one-on-one with Johnny.
“What do you need my help with?” he asks curiously, as he shuts his locker. 
“There’s this girl.” Johnny says, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck, “She’s different, Haechan, I need your help.” 
Johnny has always been the most confident person Haechan knows. He always admired him for that, but now it appears that the tall boy has a rosy tiny covering his cheeks, along with a sheepish smile. 
“My help? I can’t imagine being much help compared to Jaehyun… isn’t he your wing man?” Haechan responds.
He begins walking away, heading for his next class. He didn’t hate Johnny, nothing even close to that, but he was a bit suspicious of why he was coming to a self-proclaimed nerdy, drama student for help. 
“This is different…” Johnny mumbles as he catches up with Haechan, “Do you know that diner a few blocks from here? The Neo Zone?” 
Haechan looks over at him, “That neon, throwback place? Yeah, the theater kids go there after practice sometimes.”
“There’s a waitress there.” The older boy says, “She’s pretty, her laugh is like a song, Haechan, she’s perfect.”
“The problem, then?” Haechan asks. Johnny didn’t seem like the kind of person to have trouble with the ladies.
“She wants nothing to do with me.”
Haechan can’t help the laugh he lets out, “Did your usual flirting not work out for you?”
Johnny wasn’t a terrible guy, in fact, he could be very respectful (despite the cheesy pick-up lines sometimes), with a nice sense of humor and friendly smile to go along with it. But he had some bad habits. He refused to buy a helmet for his precious motorcycle. He smoked more than he should. He wasn’t always present during school hours. But underneath the leather jacket and torn up jeans, the boy wasn’t all that bad. He loved to flirt and fool around, but he never took things farther than someone wanted.
Johnny frowns at Haechan’s laughter, “I was hoping you could help me. She’s interested in 80s films, and I know you’re into stuff like that. You have a huge collection, don’t you? Could I borrow The Breakfast Club? Sixteen Candles?”
“Yeah, I can lend you some of them this weekend.” Haechan stops in front of the door to his next class, turning around to look back at Johnny, who’s grinning with appreciation.
“But Johnny?”
“Yeah?”
“It’s gonna take more than just flirting and watching her favorite movies. You gotta get to know her.” 
Johnny throws him a classic smirk, his confidence returning to his face, “Will do, Haechan.”
~~~
“Hey, Y/N!”
You turn around without Johnny seeing the roll of your eyes. After his shameless flirting last weekend you knew he would probably be back. 
His flirting wasn’t creepy; it was actually a little bit flattering. You couldn’t count on your hand the number of men that had spoken their fair share of sleezy comments to you. Johnny’s flirting was refreshing (but maybe that was just because he seemed to be your age instead of thirty years your senior). He asked about your favorite movies when you had mentioned liking 80s films. He complimented the sneakers you painted yourself. 
But alas, he was also a walking stereotype, with the leather jackets and motorcycle parked just out front. When you waited on his table last time, you nearly coughed over the smell of nicotine that followed him around.
“Hi, Johnny,” you say, leading him to a booth in the corner, laying out the menu on the table.
“I watched some of the movies you told me about,” he says, smiling brightly at you, “Got any more recommendations?”
You can’t help but feel a bit flustered at the fact that he watched some of the stuff you recommended. He was paying you a lot more attention than you had previously thought. 
While you take his order and bring out his food, Johnny flirts and makes jokes. You can’t help but smile at some of the things he says, despite yourself. By the end of his meal, you bring out his receipt, showing him the list of movies you wrote on the back in black pen. 
“Thanks! Maybe I could take you out and we could talk about them sometime?” he asks, a hopeful gleam in his eye. 
You roll your eyes at him, “You’re gonna have to do more than just watch my favorite movies for me to change my mind about you.” 
“Am I really that bad?”
“You aren’t bad, Johnny. I just feel like I deserve more than just someone who smokes and rides a motorcycle without protection.” You say, walking off to ring up his order and get his change. 
He huffs as you walk off. What was he to do? 
~~~
‘This is stupid,’ Johnny thinks to himself as he pulls up to the diner, a week and a half later. He was driving Haechan’s car, but that wasn’t the only thing he had borrowed.
When Johnny had reconvened with the boy, Haechan told him he needed to change up his act in order to impress you. 
And somehow this is how Johnny ended up walking into the diner with a dorky sweater and his hair neatly combed on a Friday evening. The neon sign of the diner glowed into the car, casting shadows on the funny pattern of the sweater.
He felt so stupid, but he was also kind of desperate. It was Haechan that had come up with the plan after suggesting he dress a bit nicer. 
“I don’t know if I have any ‘nice’ clothes, Haechan,” Johnny had told the other boy.
“Then you can borrow some of mine!” Haechan looked up at how tall his friend was, “Or maybe my brother’s…”
Johnny knows he went overboard but he also really wants to see your smile again. He supposes it’s worth it. 
“Welcome in,” you say, but as you turn around, you pause, “...Johnny?” 
He smiles, reminding himself that he can be confident without the bad boy clothes and aesthetic. “Does your shift end soon? Could I take you out for ice cream?”
Somehow you can’t help but find the outfit change endearing, so you find yourself nodding. The boy was clearly trying to impress you, so you should at least give him a chance. And ice cream sounded excellent after a long shift. It couldn’t be all that bad, could it?
~~~
It ended up being quite nice, actually. 
Johnny took you to an ice cream shop on the edge of town, leading you to a picnic bench after getting two cones of ice cream. As the sun fully slipped away and the stars started to come out along the purple sky, you both discussed movies, the future, your favorite foods, everything.
He was a good listener, holding eye contact and asking questions, full of attention. He told lovely stories when he wanted to, as well. You couldn’t help but find yourself to be a bit drawn to him when you finally gave him the time of day. His humor, his soft smiles, his contagious laugh. It was clear to see it would be easy to fall for someone like him.
It was hard though, knowing the reputation he held. He did risky things, a cigarette in one hand, his motorcycle keys in the other. From his stories, you knew he cut class. He never wore a helmet, either.
Just because he wore a nice sweater and borrowed a friend’s car didn’t change these things.
“I hope we can do this again, sometime.” 
Johnny lightly holds your hand as he stands outside of your front door while dropping you off.
You looked up at him, his face soft under your front porch light. There was so much hope in his eyes, hope for the idea that you would give him more of your time, more of your smiles.
“Oh, Johnny,” you say, slowly, “This is really sweet, but this isn’t you.”
He looks confused for a moment, protesting, “Of course, this is me. I just cleaned up my act, like you said.”
You frown, “Sure, I did say that, but you changed all the outside pieces of yourself.”
“Isn’t that what you wanted?” he asks.
“What? Johnny, no, of course not!” you exclaim, “I don’t care if you have this ‘bad boy’ act, and drink, and ride motorcycles. I just hate that you are so careless with yourself. You smelled like smoke every time I saw you. You never wear a helmet. You refuse to go to class sometimes. It hurts me seeing someone so bright, someone I’m enjoying getting to know, do nothing but hurt themselves.” 
You squeeze his hand, hoping to offer some form of comfort while you speak your truths. “Just cause you changed your clothes doesn’t mean you are changed for the better.”
“What are you saying?”
“I like you, Johnny. You.” you say, taking his hand in yours, “Not this dressed up, masked version of you. I just want you to care about yourself. So I can care about you, too.” 
Things are quiet for a moment, as Johnny stares at the ground. Finally, he looks up at you, an unknown flicker in his eyes. 
You let go of his hand, “You have some stuff to work through. You’re sweet, Johnny, and I’m happy that we’ve gotten to know each other. Please call me when you figure things out.”
You go inside, leaving him frozen in place. 
~~~
“Has Johnny come in lately?” 
You are startled out of wiping down tables at the diner when you hear someone speak to you. You look up to see a honey-haired boy, who you recognize as Haechan, one of the drama club kids from school. 
“You know him?” you ask, your eyes narrowed.
“Yeah,” Haechan rubs the back of his neck, “We’ve become friends recently. He told me he liked you. Asked to borrow some movies and stuff.” 
Realization dawns on you that Johnny had probably gone to Haechan to get some guidance. The thought makes your heart squeeze. You’d been curious about where Johnny was getting the knowledge from. You recall Haechan being in the after school film club as well. 
“He stopped coming in a while ago,” you say, “I gave him my number after we went out once, but I didn’t hear from him.”
You try to keep the feeling of sadness from washing over you, but you’re surprised at how affected you are by Johnny’s absence in the past few weeks. While his flirting could be a bit relentless sometimes, there was no doubt that he respected you through all of his charming antics.
“Hm..” Haechan seems to be deep in thought at your words. 
You ask him if he wants to order anything, but he declines, thanking you for the offer before leaving nearly as soon as he had entered. 
~~~
“Hey.”
You look up on your way out of the diner after your shift, startled by a voice. Johnny stands in the parking lot, next to his motorcycle, a soft smile across his face. He has his leather jacket back on, but surprisingly, you notice he has a helmet tucked under his arm, too.
“What are you doing here?” you ask, walking up to him, “You haven’t come in for a while.”
“Thought I’d come stop by,” he grins. “I heard you missed me.”
You look down shyly at the pavement, “I never said that… but yeah, I guess.”
It was a surprising feeling as you confessed that small truth to Johnny. It was boring around the diner without his conversations and flirting words. It felt nice to let those words out.
Johnny leans behind him, grabbing another, smaller helmet, “Wanna take a ride? I wanna take you out for another date. I even bought you a helmet. Hope you’re not scared to go a little fast.” 
You nod, unable to keep the smile off of your face. It was nice hearing Johnny’s bluntness again. He seemed more relaxed, more comfortable with himself.
You run over to your car quickly, shoving your bag into the backseat before walking back over to Johnny. You climb on to the bike behind him, feeling him place the extra helmet on your head. While he adjusts it, his fingers brush across your face, sending chills down your spine. 
Once he��s back in position, you boldly wrap your arms around his torso, letting your head rest across his jacket. You take a deep breath, expecting to smell the nicotine that follows him around, but his leather jacket smells fresh.
“Did you quit smoking?” you ask, as he turns on the motorcycle.
“Yeah, I quit after our date,” he explains, “I was kinda unbearable for a while there… That's why I didn’t come into the diner. After a while, I figured you woulda forgot about me.”
You let out a laugh as he pulls out of the parking lot, “How could I ever?” 
You both ride along in silence, aside from your nervous laughs as the motorcycle speeds through traffic. You notice the elevation getting higher as he rides outside of the city.
Finally, he pulls off next to a scenic outlook overlooking the metropolis. The sun is starting to set, casting shadows along the buildings, along Johnny’s face. You can’t tell which you find more beautiful.
“I want to thank you.” he says, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you to look at him. 
“For what?” 
“For caring about me. I didn’t even care about me.” he tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear, cupping your cheek.
You smile up at him, his soft words making you bold. You lean in, kissing his lips in response. After you pull back, Johnny wraps his arms around you, pulling you into the warmest hug of your life. 
It seemed simple, really. As the sun set with an orange glow, marking the end of a day, it also marked a new beginning. It left you both with a warm feeling. And what a feeling it was.
236 notes · View notes
purplesurveys · 1 year
Text
1703
it’s me robyn i’m just ending the ssurveys era
How often do you eat your favourite food? Sushi...maybe once a month? Probably even less than that. It’s not something I have a lot. Good sushi especially is expensive, so it’s not something I’ll always have the budget for.
Have you ever fallen asleep on public transport? (including planes) I have, very few times, but in general it’s something I try to avoid. It’s awkward and I hate the feeling of my head swinging left and right – even lurching forward – when the ride is bumpy.
What room of the house are you in right now? Just in my room.
What was the last tv show you watched? I caught the second half of Beyond the Sea episode of Black Mirror with my sister. Pretty good episode! Made me remember just why I love Black Mirror. The twist at the end was entirely unexpected for me, too.
Have you been using Apple Music? I’m on Spotify and have always preferred Spotify. I remember activating my free trial for Apple Music for what I’m almost certain was a BTS-related reason lol, but I didn’t last beyond a month on it.
Do you pay rent for the place you live? How often? I don’t.
How do you feel at this particular moment? Anything on your mind? My right shoulder is extremely sore. It’s bothersome. Emotion- and mental-wise though, I’m doing fine. I’m happy that it’s the weekend.
Where was the last place you went on vacation/holiday to? Who’d you go with? We had a weekend staycation somewhere south-ish, if that counts. I was with my family – it had been my dad’s last weekend home, so we wanted to maximize the little time we had left.
Does the place you work have music playing? What sort? Well not by default, but people can play their music if they want. No one ever does, but it’s not like we’re prohibited either.
List all the colours you’re currently wearing. Beige and orange. What’s your favourite type of donut? I like all kinds of doughnuts, as long as it is NOT filled; I’ve always disliked those. Too messy and defeats the purpose of having the hole, which to me has always been the fun part of eating a doughnut haha. I also dislike anything with coconut on or in it.
What do you usually eat for breakfast? I skip breakfast most days. If anything, I always just have iced coffee.
Do you have any candles in your bedroom? Do you light them often? I never use candles. I’m too scared of fire to deal with them on a regular basis.
When was the last time you went out for dinner? ^ The aforementioned staycation, a week ago. We went to Gerry’s Grill because we were all craving ginataang kuhol, only to find out they’ve cut it from their menu for what’s apparently been years now D: Anyway what we got was still yummy - we had kare-kare, crispy pata, and grilled squid.
Have you seen all the Hunger Games films as of current? I’ve only seen the first movie. There was a time when one of the movie channels (remember cable?) aired it absolutely nonstop.
What was the last thing you said to someone else in person? I think I was just telling my mom “yeah” when she quipped how cold it was tonight.
Do you use Windows, Mac, Linux, or something else entirely? Mac.
How many times do you call someone on the phone a week? Never. Have you cooked anything today? What was it? I don’t cook.
Do you have a lot of cousins? What are their names? Yeah when you’re Filipino the list of cousins just never ends. I even have first cousins I’ve never met before.
What does your shampoo smell like? It doesn’t really have a distinct scent. It just smells...nice and refreshing, I guess lol.
What about the body wash or soap you’re using at the moment? It smells just like soap. I’m not picky at all when it comes to bathroom products; as long as it gets the job done then I get it.
Have you ever had an exotic or unusual pet? Nah.
Any movies you’ve seen recently that you’d recommend to me? Not really, no.
Why did you last go see a doctor? Besides the dentist, I went to the local animal bite center to get my last wave of shots after Cooper bit me.
What was the last thing you bought online? Wireless headphones.
Where do you usually park your car? We have a carport.
Does your mail get delivered to your house or do you have to collect it? Always delivered straight here. I’m not sure if we have a public facility where mails can be sent otherwise.
Are you more logical or creative? Logical. Creativity is not my forte.
Do you cut tags out of clothing so they don’t itch and bother you? Most of the time, unless it’s a pricey brand.
What is your dream job? Do you think that’s attainable for you? If writing paid well, I would’ve been in media a long time ago so I can write for the rest of my life. It’s all I know and love to do. Alas I’ve had to compromise and stick to a path that to be fair still entails a lot of writing (great for me), but also demands other skills that I’ve since had to pick up and learn.
When was the last time you looked at Facebook, Twitter or etc.? About half an hour ago. It’s 3 AM and all my feeds are understandably dry.
Have you ever been on a train? Where did you go? A few times. Last time was in Bangkok, and we were just travelling back home after one of our Klook tours.
How many times a year do you go on vacation? 2-3 times a year, usually with family. Bangkok really awakened the traveler in me though and I wanna make it a point now to travel with my own funds at least once a year.
Can you curl your tongue or do anything else cool with it? I can just curl it.
What was the last job interview you went to? It was for a global e-commerce site. I was desperate to escape at the time, but that feeling has since considerably died down.
Do you ever just feel like you need to be alone for some reason? Of course. It’s a fairly common feeling I get, especially in a job that squeezes so much socializing out of me on a daily basis.
When was the last time you wore something totally inappropriate for the weather? Does this happen often? I’m not sure...hasn’t happened in a while. The weather doesn’t exactly drastically change often in this part of the world, so I always have an idea what to wear.
The last time you went out of the house, where were you going and what did you do? I was going to the office because I had a scheduled one-on-one with the CEO. Nothing big or serious, she just likes to have catch-ups with her employees from time to time and that’s what we had.
When was the last time someone cancelled plans on you? Were you annoyed? Eh, it was like half a year ago. We invited a few friends for a Christmas gathering, then they canceled the day of. I was definitely a bit peeved then but I’ve since moved past it.
Do you have a friend that has a tendency to “dump” you whenever they get a new partner? I don’t have friends like that. All of them are either in committed relationships by this point, or are too busy to find a partner.
Would you ever want to go on vacation with just one of your parents? In theory it would be nice but realistically I think it’d just be awkward.
In summer, do you prefer to wear dresses or shorts and tops? Dresses! I’ve never been into shorts.
Has someone ever tried to start an argument with you over Facebook? What happened? Yeah, once. I just ignored it because I knew it was pointless to argue with the man who tried to start something with me.
Have you ever had an unusual type of milk (eg. oat, rice, almond)? Almond milk, yes.
If you could experience life as a Disney princess for a week, which princess would you pick and why? Rapunzel. I’d love to hang out with Maximus and Pascal.
How many cans of soda would you say you drink in a week, if any at all? Zero, I hate soda.
When you’re at home, do you spend most of your time in your room? I wouldn’t say so. I like hanging out downstairs too because I regularly play with the dogs and use the TV there too.
If you like to sleep in late, have your parents ever told you off for doing so? I don’t sleep in. You know how revenge bedtime procrastination is a thing? I like to do that with waking up too, if that makes sense lol i.e. I wake up early so I get more out of my day.
How much stuff do you take with you when you go on vacation for a week? I overpack to the point of absurdity. If I’m going away for a week, I will 100% pack clothes good for 1.5-2 weeks instead. I like having my options because I might not always feel my ‘planned’ outfit for the day I’m meant to wear it.
How old is your oldest living relative? To my knowledge that would be my maternal grandmother, but idk. I could possibly have relatives who may be older.
Could you willingly live on a vegan diet? I’m sure I can, as long as the meals are prepared for me. I have no clue how to whip up any vegan dishes.
If you’re a fan of Harry Potter, are you sad that there’ll never be another book or movie? I’m not an HP fan.
If you’re an only child, do you wish you had siblings? If you have siblings, do you get along? I’m great with my younger sister.
How long have you had the shirt you’re wearing? Less than a year.
What happened last time you got drunk? Stayed in the parking lot for like 30 minutes because I thought I lost the money I needed to pay for the parking, and was frantically looking for it around the car (the time alone was enough to make me sober again lol)...eventually I gave up and fortunately the payment booth accepted e-wallets, so I got to get out of there and drive back home. Then the next day I went back to the car to try and look for that stupid P500 bill only to find it in the cup holder -______-
When’s the last time you straightened your hair? Over a decade ago.
Do you bite your toe nails? Oh my. No I don’t.
Last thing you said out loud? I was just singing along to a song.
Last time you laughed your head off? About half an hour ago watching Run BTS. What do you want right this second? I could go for McDonald’s right now, but ehhhh I can hold it out.
How are you sitting? My legs are propped up.
Your mood? Content.
Did you sleep alone last night? Yuppers.
Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow? I don’t think I’m supposed to be anyway. I’ve got a dentist appointment first thing later.
Do you find piercings attractive? It’s highly subjective for me. A lip piercing might look super hot on someone but meh on another person.
What were you doing last night at midnight? I think I was watching Smosh.
Will you have sexual intercourse within the next two weeks? Nope.
How many cigarettes have you smoked today? Zero.
Do you have a hard time admitting you’re wrong? Sometimes.
Do you like potato chips? They’re fine, but can definitely live without them.
Do you give out second chances way too easily? No.
0 notes
oh-styles · 4 years
Text
Something About a Beginning: Part II
First off, I want to thank each and every one of you for your immense patience. (More so than others, but I digress.) Writing on such topics when you yourself aren’t in the most healthiest mentality is a struggle alone, but we got here. 
Second off, if you haven’t read the first part, you can so here. These chapters implicate bouts of depression and talks of miscarriage, so read at your own will. 
I do want to note that I mention Robin in this story, and I was hesitant to include him because I felt it wasn’t appropriate, because he shouldn’t be used as entertainment purposes (i.e. in stories) but I mention him only with love and respect.
Again, thank you for your patience, and happy reading.
July 3, 2019 London, England
Harry lost his girl.
She vanished in the night – gone with the wind – and all that remained was a ghost of a woman, transparent and bleak. He hasn’t seen her smile since that night, coming close to a week now, and his gut retches at the thought he might never get his girl back.
She’s buried herself in the sheets; the window is opened a crack, and he spots an empty bottle of melatonin laying overturned on her bedside table. He stares intently at her body, watching as the sheets rise and fall to the pattern of her placid breathing, and he thinks for a moment that she’s finally found herself a better place. Not dead—not by any means. Whatever dream world she has found herself delved in, he knows she might have found a sliver of peace there, hopefully smiling.
“She’s sleeping, mum.” Harry says into his phone, taking a step back to gently close the bedroom door. “Rande and Cindy invited us to Muskoka but…” His words hung in the air, like the elephant in the room, but his mother knew all too well what was lingering on the precipice of her sons’ tongue.
But she’s too depressed.
But she can’t go a day without crying.
But I don’t think she has the energy to leave the house.
It’s been four days since the attack, and Harry hasn’t seen her take a step outside of their bedroom.
“Love, she’s wasting away in there. It might help her a little to get out, get some sun…”
“Mum, I can’t even get her to sit in the fucking garden.” He can hear his mother’s nettled sigh on the other end of the line, but how can anyone expect him to put her on a mother fucking airplane if she can’t even bother to walk the 30 meters to the fucking garden? “The sodding paps were outside the house last night.”
“They can’t—”
“I’m aware.” He begins to descend his way down the stairs, stopping to peer out from the front window – an old, worn out habit. “I think it’s best we get away for a bit. The story hasn’t died down… I think it’ll help—getting away. They won’t bother us there.”
Harry knew your answer before he even had the chance to ask; he knew he was wasting his time in even suggesting such a thing, but the guilt would eat away at him if he didn’t even try.
“Muskoka…Canada, remember? We went there last year.” He sat at the edge of the bed, running a hand over the sheets where a peek of your shoulder laid exposed. “It’ll be quiet. Nobody there to bug us. If you want to just hang out in the hotel room the whole time, I’d be fine with that. It’s just…”
I can’t stand to see you burrowed away another day.
“I’m really worried about you… I’m just trying to help.” He was powerless, and he knew it. He couldn’t take her by the arm and force her on a plane, but god forbid he try his damned hardest. “No paps, nobody. I promise. I wouldn’t take you there if it wasn’t safe.”
He feels a stir beneath him, and from underneath the covers, a small hand inches outward and lays upward, a silent plea for intimacy—a piece of familiarity he hasn’t touched in days. He reaches out and clasps her hand in his, and readjusts himself to lay beside her.
“You can think about it. I don’t need an answer this second, but give it a day or two, okay?”
He sees her nod, and her eyes blink open to meet his, only for a second, before they are closed once again for the remainder of the night.
*
July 6, 2019 Ontario, Canada
Muskoka came and went. Nothing advantageous to really capture your attention, though you kept your head nestled low in a book for most of your stay. You tossed a couple Stephen King novels into your bags without much thought, and by the time your trip was coming to an end, you had already completed one and started another.
A photo made its rounds online of you at dinner with Harry, Rande and Cindy, and even thinking back to that night, you couldn’t recount a time where you felt a pair of eyes boring at your table. You think it might be because you paid more attention to the drink menu than your friends, but you digressed. They only saw the back of your head, and not even the photographer mentioned you. You were also mistaken for Kaia on a couple occasions.
After Muskoka, you were back in London, and not much later Harry would be jetting off to Italy for Google Camp, and a few days after that, he was set to fly to Mexico for a video shoot. He was redundant to go, and even called Jeff to see if they could reschedule, but that would cause a delay for the next video they’d film only a week later. He asked if you wanted to join him, and you kindly declined. You were much aware of his past video sets, and how common it was to see photos and videos leaked online, and you were far from interested to be included.
You were much happier to find yourself under the watchful eyes of Anne Twist.
“I can meet you in Scotland if I’m feeling up to it.” You knew it was a scorching lie crawling right off your tongue, but if it meant he carried some hope with him, then you would feed him whatever white lies you could muster. Even Anne knew better than to believe you.
“I think Canada was good for you, love, but you need some rest, too. Can’t be travelling all over the bloody world, now, can you?”
It was a nice feeling to know she had your back.
In another life would a little green monster be envious of missing such a trip to Cancun, but the only desires you had were sitting in Anne’s garden being force fed a steady cup a tea and a plate of biscuits.
Anne didn’t pry; she knew well what you needed, but she would be keeping her sons promise on keeping you safe, and she knew there was no safer place for you to be.
It was August now, and the heat felt suffocating. You and Anne spent your mornings walking to the bakery her son once worked in, grabbing a quick breakfast before heading to the park. You would pick off pieces of your croissant and toss it at the squirrels, but you almost always scared them off. Anne told stories of when Harry was a child, and how he once tried to tell her Gemma was a drug dealer.
“She was only a child,” she hummed, laughing into her coffee. “But he was always a character to have around.”
“I feel like…between you and me, right?” You could hear in the distance the sound of a goose honking and a group of children wailing, running away. “I just…don’t want to upset him.”
Anne reached over and took your hand in hers. “Anything you say is always safe with me, love.”
“I’m mad he left me here.” There was a short beat, but you could feel your throat close, and that anger begin to well up in your chest. “This…this is also…”
“I know, love.” She scooted closer, squeezing your hand. “Everyone has their own ways of dealing with grief. Harry isn’t good at sitting around… Even when Robin passed, he didn’t like to sit. He needed to go do something.”
You remember, and yet you still recall him lying on his mother’s couch in tears. You don’t think he’s cried since the two of you left the hospital a couple weeks ago.
“He loves you, darling. He calls me every day to check in on you. Don’t think for a second he doesn’t care.”
Even with her words, you felt something was missing.
*
Harry was only in Scotland for a couple days before he was finally home, but it wouldn’t be long before he would be venturing off to Italy – again – for another work-related conquest. You weren’t sure why he was so content with country hopping every couple of weeks instead of resting at home with you, but you didn’t bother bludgeoning him with questions.
“After I’m through with Italy—I won’t even be there a day—I’ll be back home, but a couple weeks later, I have to go to LA for some meetings… I’d like you to come, if that’s okay.”
Again. There’s always something. It must be so fucking difficult to stay in one place for more than a couple weeks with your grieving girlfriend.
“Also…I was meaning to ask you. Ariana is in town in a few days… Wanted to know if you wanted to come with me and the guys… I think it’ll be fun.”
“Your child died a month ago and you want to go to a fucking Ariana Grande concert.” The words fell helplessly from you, but it was weeks of anguish and neglect that hit its final tier, and you were quite tired of hanging on. “Tell me….how does that make sense to you?”
“Excuse me?” For the first time that night, he looked at you. All before, he found excuses to shift his glances to anything but you, maybe in fear of reality finally hitting him in the face with what he’s been running from for weeks, but for the first time that night, he bared his eyes down at you, and his mouth fell open.
“I’m sorry—have I been hallucinating you just picking your shit up and leaving every chance you get?”
“I’ve had work—” He took to his feet, swiftly flinging his hand out to close the lid of his luggage.
“Any normal person—I swear, any normal person would stay home, and fucking grieve, except you, who wants to fucking fly everywhere and work, because that would require facing his fucking prob—”
“I have a job—I know it’s hard for you to relate to that, but I have commitments—”
“And what am I then? If not a commitment, then what, Harry?”
“You are a commitment—”
“Then where have you been? Why have I been staying with your mother? I know you invited me to go with you, but I shouldn’t have to. I’m fucking hurting, Harry! I don’t want to go to Cancun and Italy—I want to be here with you. Do you know how fucking hard it’s been dealing with this without you here?”
For once, he was silent, but he shifted on his feet.
“You haven’t cried. Not since the hospital. I can’t count how many times I’ve cried, and you sit around texting your band or going to video shoots… If you feel nothing—no grief or anything…if you didn’t even want the baby, just tell me. Make this easier on me, please.”
“How the fuck can you say that I didn’t want the baby? My heart is fucking hurt!”
“Then act like it!”
“You really think I can sit around every day and watch you fall apart? I have to be the strong one… If it can’t be you, then it has to be me, and I don’t like watching you hurt.”
“You know…you sometimes have a really shitty way showing people you care about them.”
You stood there, arms folded in resistance, and he couldn’t take his eyes from off the floor. He felt cornered, and he was defenseless with nothing else left to give. His bags still laid on the bed, clothes scattered over the sheets ready to be put up, and you knew this room was no place for you. Your purse was downstairs, and your phone in your pocket.
“I’m going to stay with Gemma tonight. I’ll have her pick me up. Please don’t follow me out.” 
*
She’s always been the quiet one.
The first time she met you, at a family gathering you were reluctant to attend despite the persistent reassurance from your other half, she knew from the moment she saw you that you were different from all the others. You held yourself different, much shorter, like you knew you could never become the center of attention.
You studied the room, holding onto Harry’s hand as he introduced you to his mother, and that’s when Gemma appeared from over her mother’s shoulder.
“About time I meet you,” she chuckled, reaching her hand out. “I’m Gemma.”
She watches you now from the edge of the driveway, sitting on the steps of the porch with only the light above you illuminating your surroundings. From behind you, she spotted the silhouette of her brother peeking through the curtains, keeping a close eye for just in case.
Your track record wasn’t a good one.
As she approaches, you perk your head up with a sigh of relief. For the first time, she was the Styles you nothing but needed.
“Come on, Magoo,” she chirps as she finally reaches you, lifting her hand out for you to take. “We can hit the McDonald’s drive-thru.”
Laura Nyro played over her car stereo, a melodious tune you recall hearing once before on a long drive in Cheshire. You shut your eyes, and the memory floods you like a storm, like a stampede parading across your chest, and you lean over to rest your head on the window.
Gemma reached her hand over to find yours, giving it three squeezes of solace.
I. Love. You.
The cut that was tucked away in your hairline was in its last stages of healing, and a scar would most certainly take its place. You always felt the erratic throbbing, like a little reminder that no matter how far you run, your problems will always be chasing you like the devil.
“Did I make a mistake?”
Gemma turned her attention from the road, lifting your hand up with hers, and planting a soft kiss to your knuckles.
“No, Magoo. I’m sorry to tell you, but you’re dating a dumbass.” She heard a muted hum in response. “Nobody is perfect… Not even that shithead. I can see where he thought what he was doing was okay, because he was sacrificing his feelings for you, but… that’s just not how you do it.”
You could drink to that.
Gemma spotted the golden arches and took a left at the light. “I’m glad you texted me… Haven’t had a bloody girl’s night in ages. It sucks under the circumstances but…” She turned back to you with a wink. “I’ll take what I can get.”
On the journey back to her flat, you pleasantly sipped at your chocolate milkshake and tapped your feet to the music, and even sporadically hummed along to the few chords you knew. It really didn’t take much to please you.
Gemma was never gifted a sister as a child. Though, she did want one, and was thoroughly distraught when her mother brought home a brother all those years ago, she did grow accustomed and grew to love the curly haired boy who she would then share with the world. But the girl beside her, who slurped her drink and choked behind a laugh of a joke about a time traveler who walks into a bar, had burrowed herself deep within her heart, much like she does with any counterpart she meets.
It’s incredibly difficult not to meet this girl and not hold some sort of placement in her life. Her heart is massive, but the love she radiates is gracious and touches anyone who dares get too close.
And the love Gemma has for her is just as the same.
Michal was asleep when the two of you arrived; you knew your way around, and confidently walked to the spare room down the hall, last door on the right. Gemma trailed behind you, holding your milkshake as you flipped on the light, and kicked off your shoes.
Olivia was already sprawled out over the comforter.
“Could you stay with me, tonight?”
“You don’t have to ask me twice, babe.” Gemma smirked, setting your drink down on the bedside table. “Have you ate?”
You shook your head, even trying to recall if you had mustered an appetite to have some breakfast, but even then you think you took a couple bites out of an apple and forgot about it.
“I’ll make you something—actually, Michal and I have spinach ravioli left over… Want me to heat some of that up for you?”
You graciously nodded. “You’re too good for me.”
“I just love you is all.”
The next morning, the spot beside you was visibly vacant, and from down the hall you could vaguely hear a low, sullen voice talking over the sound of the television. Gemma fired back in response, and from your feet, Olivia peeked her head from the covers, turning towards the disrupting noise.
“Let her sleep—she’s exhausted—”
“Just give me five bloody minutes!”
You knew any chance of sleep you wish you had was far gone.
“I’m up—just fucking talk!” You hollered into your pillow, your eyes still adjusting to the sunlight cascading into the room. You could guess it wasn’t any later than nine that morning, and before you had a moment to check, his unquestionable footsteps neared your door, and you heard a light tap. “I’m obviously awake.”
After you walked out the night before, he ignored your wishes and followed you downstairs where the shortest reaction he got from you was the front door slamming in his face.
“Can I talk?”
I don’t know, can you?
“You literally came here and woke me up from some incredible sleep, mind you, and you’re asking me if you can talk.” He was in a blind panic and darted his eyes around the room. “Well, talk.”
“I’m a fucking twat, I know this. It’s inexcusable what I did—what I put you through—it was selfish—I’m so fucking selfish—I can’t fucking deal with this kind of stuff, and I’m a bloody twat for leaving you because I can’t handle it. It’s cowar—I’m a coward! I can’t face shit—and I love you so much, and I left you… I’m so sorry, please believe me. I’m such a twat—"
“Shut up, please—you’re giving me a migraine.” You held up a single finger as you adjusted yourself in bed. “Look, I don’t even know how early it is, and you know how much I hate mornings.”
“I know, but…I didn’t want to wait until the afternoon to talk to you.”
“That’s fair.”
“It’s 10:30 by the way.”
“Did you practice that speech in your car, or did you just wing it?”
While you were in bed with Gemma, watching King of the Hill on her iPad, Harry resided to his office where he spent much of the evening hunched over his journal, scrawling out endless messages to you about how much of a wanker he is, and by the time the sun began to rise, he had his eyes in his hand and began waiting for an appropriate time to come and see you.
“I…thought a little bit about it, yeah.”
“You really hurt me, alright? It’s not something I can just forget because you said you were sorry. When I needed you the most, you weren’t there. What kind of partner is that?” He stood silent in his spot; his hands dug deep into his trousers. Suddenly, he was a little boy again getting scolded by his mother. “I had your mom, I had Gemma, but not you. The only person I needed. I get this wasn’t part of the plan, and we got our hearts broken, but that doesn’t give you the right to run off because you can’t handle seeing me upset.”
Olivia stretched her limbs out over the covers, purring against the sheets.
“I appreciate you coming, I really do. This isn’t something I can just forget and move on from. I want to work on this, but it’s going to take time… I still love you though.”
*
September 19, 2019 Los Angeles, California
“Your shirt looks like amebae under a microscope.”
He stifled a grunt, looking down at his shirt with concentration, and every so subtly did you see him glance swiftly at the bathroom mirror. “I’m surprised you even know what ameba are.”
“Or it looks like those eye floaties you get, but…colorful, you know?”
“Will you stop bullying me?”
“Only when you tell me how much you paid for that shirt.”
For a second, and you saw it flash through his eyes, he considered telling you, but figured that was a fight for a different afternoon. His silence was all the answer you needed. You nodded and left the room.
He found himself eminently lucky that you even agreed to accompany him to Los Angeles, but it was under the one condition that he takes you to In-N-Out whenever you oh so politely asked. Though, after you harassed him over his attire that morning, he was undecided to change his mind.
He didn’t.
You did, however, apologize and say he looked like a sexy ameba, and he then locked you out of the car for five minutes.
To be fair, you only accepted his offer to travel with him because you missed your friends, and they were the one thing that remained untouched from the summer. You felt the emptiness being carried with you with every passing day, and all the books and websites said that was normal, but finding distractions and hobbies to pass the time was coming close to becoming a sport – way too laborious for you.
You even found yourself searching “Losing interest in things I used to like” and you were considerably shocked to discover the rabbit hole Google led you down.
You didn’t consider yourself depressed, not by any means. Sure, you were sad most of the day, you never really gained your appetite back, you stopped painting and watching King of the Hill and Breaking Bad, and if you didn’t spend the entire day sleeping, you would lay in bed with your eyes closed, praying you would eventually grow tired enough to slip away for a little while.
Harry even signed you both up for couple’s therapy.
“This is for people who cheated on each other and refuse to break up!”
But regardless of your inherent fussing, he refused to back down. Where the two of you stood mentally, this was your last chance at redemption, and he wasn’t letting you back out. The way he saw it, if you didn’t make an effort to try and fix what was broken, there was no hope for the relationship moving forward.
That was when you realized the outcome was more than just losing your baby.
After the first session, you made an appointment with your physician, who later prescribed not only you with anti-depressants, but Harry as well. Your world was spinning madly, in every which direction, but at least you had your boy holding on madly with you.
The first time you encountered a fan since the summer happened on that very first outing in Los Angeles when you and Harry were arriving for your lunch plans. (Not In-N-Out, but you let it go.) If it had been solely one girl, you trust that you could easily fight her off if given the opportunity. I mean, sure, you didn’t fight off that other girl, but she had the upper hand, or so you tell yourself.  
But, no, she was with a group, and you felt the urge to vomit.
“I’m going to throw up—” You propel yourself in the other direction, ready to sprint back to the parking lot, and thinking back on it now, you can’t even remember the last time you even sprinted. “Let me sit in the car—let’s get the food to go—I don’t care—”
This is why we should have fucking gone to In-N-Out.
“Pet—you can’t run forever, okay? I know it’s fucking scary, but you have to face this one day.” You remember the exact quote Harry was reciting from the therapist, just with less profanity. “I won’t let them do shit, alright?”
They did stop him, of course, and you took a few steps away so they could have their moment, but you made sure he was still an arm grab away incase—
“Hey,” You had disregarded the voice, opening a game on your phone – Numberzilla – before you registered someone had spoken to you. “I’m sorry to bother you…”
At first glance, you could easily discern she was unsure of herself. She likely had a rush of confidence, and now standing blankly in front of you, she has lost all certainty. From behind, you peered up to find Harry staring at the back of her head, already inching into his pocket for his keys.
“Oh,” you gulp, clutching your phone in your hands. “Hi…”
“I just…was just hoping that you were doing okay.”
Doing okay, because of—
Your heart thudded to a stop.
“You alright?” Harry was at your side, and the young girl took a step back.
“Sorry—I’m sorry.” She gave a weak smile. “I just wish the best for you two.”
She was already walking off when you mustered up the words to thank her, but you were doubtful she heard you. Harry’s arm was in a tight grip around your backside, with his keys hung in his hand, ready to run.
The two of you cancelled your lunch plans and hit In-N-Out instead.
*
September 24, 2019 Los Angeles, California
“Is it okay?”
It was a Tuesday; you had a clear agenda for the day, and it was a little after lunch that you found yourself aimlessly clicking through channels, with your boyfriend sitting down by your feet, flipping through the pages of your current read.
You had felt the undeniable ache since the night before, and you thought maybe if you just ignore it, it’ll go away, but it only lingered, taunting you with its insatiable lust.
The itch you don’t want to scratch.
Your heart was racing, your palms were sweaty, and it didn’t matter how tightly you squeezed your legs together, nothing could rid you of this.
“H,” You poked his leg with your toe. “Bear with me on this, okay?” He didn’t respond, but he carefully set your book back down on the coffee table. “Will you have sex with me real quick?”
“I…you want to?”
“Do you have condoms? Because if not, I can take care of this myself—”
“Yes, yes, I have them. I have—they’re upstairs.”
And there you were, minutes later, his cock was inside of you, and he slowly rolled his hips carefully into you, dipping his toes into the water. He physically cannot express how much this meant to him, and how long he hid this desire deep in his gut, because God forbid he be the one to bring it up. If he had to wank off in the bathroom in between commercial breaks until you decided you were ready to have sex again, he’d find a way to tolerate it.
“Is it okay?” He choked out in between breaths; only minutes in, and he was cradling dangerously on the edge.
“Yeah—yeah, it’s okay. It feels good.” You readjusted your hips, stretching your leg out to wrap around his. “Maybe a little faster?”
“I’ll cum in a second—” He shook his head, halting his movements when that tiny, little knot inched closer to unravelling. “Just give me a sec.”
“Babe—”
“Hold—” He reached his arm under the bend of your knee, lifting it up as he thrusted back into you. “Fuck—”
He was relentless; you stretched your hand down between your thighs, rubbing and kneading that small bundle of nerves as his cock hit deep within you with no sign of letting up.
It had been way too long.
“Harry—fuck—” It was deep, pulsating, and you lifted your hips up as your orgasm radiated throughout your every limb, tightening around his cock as he thrusted hard, giving you one last nudge of pleasure as his grip tightened around the sheets, fucking into you with a lasting, animalistic moan, cumming thick ropes into you.
You made him access the condom, triple checking there wasn’t a hole unbeknownst to either of you, and after a fourth overview, he politely asked you if he could throw away his used condom now.
You would be okay this time.
He ran a bath a little later, and you submerged your body deep within the bubbles, letting them rest at your jawline. You felt like you lost your virginity all over again.
“H?” You asked, rubbing the bubbles up your arm.
“Yes, pet?”
“Do you want to get married?”
The question caught him, and he cracked his eyes open with curiosity. “I want to, yeah. You know I do.”
The conversation had only been passed around once, when you were terribly drunk and crying over some sob film where the boyfriend dies before they have a chance to elope despite their parent’s protests. The film stuck with you for weeks, and you always wondered, if you knew you were with the one, why wait? Why wait for tragedy to strike?
“Let’s get married.”
He chuckled, wiggling his toes against yours. “You’re mental.”
“No, I’m serious. Why wait? Seriously? I love you, you love me, and we aren’t getting any younger.”
“Pet, you’re 24.”
“And only getting older!”
“So, you want to find some Little White Chapel in Vegas and get hitched?” He leaned up a little, a smirk stretching out on his face.
“I want a real wedding, of course, someday, but right now…let’s do it. Let’s go to Vegas or Miami or somewhere, and just do it.”
It took an hour, but he eventually agreed, and was on the phone with Jeff to arrange a flight and hotel. The next day, the two of you ran around downtown to every consignment shop in the city, looking for a white dress – not as hard as you thought it would be – a diamond ring – a little tough, but you found one for cheap – and a nice pair of heels in your size – a lot harder; you bought a size too big by accident.
And in 24 hours, you would be marrying your best friend.
*
Miami, FL September 26, 2019
“Shit…fuck, we’re actually doing this?” You stuffed a wad of tissue paper into the toe box of your heels – one size too big – and stood up to test them for a final time. “No going back?”
“Cold feet, pet?”
“No, I’m fucking—it’s humid in here.” You swing around to face him, fanning yourself off with a loose People magazine, and its then you see him standing smugly in his slacks, a proper grin etching itself across his face.
“Cold feet—the expression, pet…”
“Harry—fuck, I’m nervous. My shoes are too big, I feel a pimple forming on my chin, and I’m pretty sure the wire in my bra broke ten minutes ago because something is stabbing my tit.”
“Well, I think your tits look great.”
“You can thank that bombshell bra I bought years ago for that.” You stroll back over to the sofa and toss the magazine carelessly onto the coffee table. “Did you have them sign an MDMA?”
“NDA, and Jeff got that covered.” Harry combs back a piece of his hair, that one strand that always gives him trouble. “Hold onto this for me?” You watch as he removes his H ring, and strolls over to the sofa. “Put it in your bra—can’t lose much in there.”
“You’re hilarious.”
“And you’re my wife.” His fucking smug grin falls over him like a tidal wave, and you wish you could just slap it right off his face.
“No, I’m not.”  
“Give it a couple minutes.”
Your heart hurled itself up into your esophagus, the tremorous pounding radiating all throughout your head to your toes. Harry appeared quite relaxed as he staggered to the full-length mirror to adjust his collar, and from the reflection, he caught your watchful stare.
“Your mom is going to be pissed.” You think back to Anne, and all the good she’s done for you, and you are now repaying her by having her miss her son’s wedding. “We’ll need to plan the real thing soon.”
“We’ll tell her when we want to tell her, but for now,” he swung around on his heel to face you, “This is about you and me…and the rest of our lives.”
You make a mental note to thank Niall later.
You think back to those years ago, and how you almost bailed on Niall that night to stay home and watch The Young and the Restless with your roommate. You weren’t thrilled to get that phone call, but as long as Niall agreed to pay for a couple drinks, you found it in yourself to put on a pair of pants and enjoy a night out. 
And maybe if you had inclined to stay home, your entire life would be a completely different world right now. Maybe you’d be in somebody else’s kitchen helping them prepare dinner, or on some lavish vacation with a guy you only met a month ago, or maybe you’d be alone in your apartment, binging a new show to pass the time you only let flutter by.
But you were here now, standing at an alter that smelled roughly of cigarettes and mildew, wearing shoes that were too big on you, in a dress that probably saw more weddings than you ever will, holding the hands of the man you were prepared to love for the rest of your life.
Nothing seemed to matter anymore, not the harassing, not the attack, not the stalking. It didn’t matter what anybody threw at you anymore; you were hard as fucking stone, and not a single person was going to damage what the two of you were building.
“You may now kiss your bride.”
221 notes · View notes
henrycavillobsessed · 4 years
Text
Porcelain
Characters: Henry Cavill x Anwen Evans (fictional fiance)
Summary: Henry and Anwen’s life was perfect. Until one day, one phone call, changes everything.
Words: 3,444
TW/CW: Death, car accident, description of injuries, hospital, grief. Slight mention of implied sex; some bad language. 
Notes: So here it is, my latest fanfic. It’s been a while, due to a bit of a mind block. The idea for this came to me, after being inspired by the song Porcelain by Emarosa (link below in case you’re interested). This one is different to my other fics, for one it’s not the usual Henry x reader narrative. I have created a character this time to act as his partner. Also this one is LONG (3,444 words). I have enjoyed writing a longer and more complex story and I hope you enjoy reading it. (As a warning, it’s SAD. I am not ashamed to admit I cried just writing it.)
Link to song: https://open.spotify.com/track/7rk8cH53nI8ffb5ZccjfpT?si=QMVvEmA3TK-3WuQXJanMmQ
Tumblr media
“Oww! Shit!”
Henry looked up from the book he was reading in bed. Anwen was rubbing her forehead and looking very wounded. She’d clearly just walked into the doorframe. Again. Henry laughed out loud.
“Don’t laugh at me!” A pillow flew through the air and missed its target of Henry’s face by a considerable amount. He laughed again. 
“I can’t help it. You are so clumsy!”
Anwen climbed into bed, still massaging the sore spot on her head. She scowled at Henry. “If I remember correctly Mr Cavill, it was because of me being clumsy that meant we met for the very first time.”
“Hmm,” Henry reached over and gathered her up in his arms, leaning back against the headboard. He kissed her gently on the faint bruise that was blooming on her pale skin. “I do remember,” he said fondly. 
          It had been over five years ago now. Henry was out with his friend and colleague Simon Pegg, drinking their way through some of London’s best nightclubs. It had been a great night so far, with both men enjoying their freedom; they’d recently finished filming their latest movie and were celebrating. Henry was feeling happily tipsy, and when Simon offered to go to the bar for another round, he didn’t refuse. 
“Get some shots too!” he shouted at Simon’s back as he left their table. Simon waved a hand in response; Henry took that as a yes and smiled. He was just checking his Instagram on his phone when something- someone- crashed into him and he felt the cold wetness of a spilt drink over his shoulder and down his shirt. He looked up incredulously. A woman was stood there with an empty glass and an equally shocked expression.
“Oh, my go- I am so sorry!” she said in a very attractive Welsh accent, Henry thought. He felt his annoyance dissipate immediately. 
“Hey, don’t worry about it, accidents happen. How much have you had to drink anyway?” he asked cheekily. 
The woman’s ivory skin blushed, contrasting prettily with her ebony hair, which was cascading around her shoulders in thick waves.
“Um, I actually don’t drink,” she admitted. “I have just shown you how uncoordinated I am; I really don’t need to throw alcohol into the mix.” 
“Very wise. Hi, I’m Henry Cavill.”
“Anwen Evans, nice to meet you.” They shook hands and were making pleasant small talk when Simon returned with the drinks.
“What on earth happened to your shirt?” he asked Henry. 
“Anwen happened. Anwen, this is my friend Simon Pegg.” 
Anwen’s face lit up. “I love your movies! Hot Fuzz is just hilarious!” she said to Simon, who smiled widely and they spent the next few moments quoting lines from the film. Simon looked sideways at Henry, and saw the way he was looking at Anwen, and cleared his throat.
“Well, it’s been lovely to meet you, but I must get on. Henry, I’ll call you tomorrow,” he said, winking at his friend. Henry mouthed a silent thank you, grinning. 
After Anwen explained to her girlfriend’s that she was going to continue the night with Henry, prompting a lot of excited giggling and whispering, she sat herself down at Henry’s table. The hours flew by as they got to know each other. Anwen was an up-and-coming chef, who’d recently opened a new restaurant nearby in London. She told Henry about the restaurant’s menu, and Henry promised to try it out soon. In return, Henry told her about the films he’d been in. He was mock-outraged when Anwen admitted she’d never seen a Superman movie, let alone Man of Steel, and laughing, she promised she’d check it out soon. Conversation naturally flowed between them, Henry felt so at ease with her, and it turned out they had quite a bit in common. As Henry told Anwen about his akita Kal, Anwen told him she also had a dog, a golden retriever named Ciri.
“Ciri?” Henry had asked. “As in Ciri from The Witcher?”
“Yeah! I’m such a huge fan, I’ve read all the books, and I’ve played all the games!”
Henry laughed. “You are never going to believe who I’ve just been cast as for my next job…” Anwen’s jaw dropped to the floor when he told her. 
The night ended with Henry walking Anwen home to her nearby townhouse, and they shared their first kiss on the doorstep, swapping numbers with the promise to meet up again soon for a date.
          Now back in the present, nearly six years later, Anwen had moved into Henry’s penthouse, with Ciri who Kal adored. Both dogs were curled up at the end of the bed now, fast asleep.
In Henry’s arms, Anwen cuddled in close. “Yes, so if it wasn’t for me tripping and drenching you that night we wouldn’t be here now, so stop taking the piss!”  
“Okay, okay!” Henry laughed. “I do worry though, you know. You’re like… like porcelain. So easily broken. Be more careful, I’d hate for something to happen, for me to lose you. I love you so much, my Annie.”
“Don’t be so soft! I’m not going anywhere, not for a long time. And I’ll love you until the day I’m gone, and if I can love after, then I will then too. So shush,” Anwen replied, placing a kiss on his lips.
“Anyway, I’m not that breakable, I don’t think. Wanna test this theory?” 
Swinging her legs around Henry’s waist, Anwen straddled him and seductively removed her top. She was braless underneath. Henry whistled low, and licked his lips.
“Yes ma’am.”
          Henry and Anwen’s life continued in perfect bliss. Both had never been as happy as they were with each other. Anwen was now an established celebrity chef, having opened many more restaurants worldwide, written a few cookbooks and even been on television a couple of times. Henry’s career as an actor was skyrocketing, his role at Geralt in The Witcher making him a household name. This meant that he had to travel all around the globe for work, however this didn’t impact his and Anwen’s relationship in the slightest, as she regularly went with him, using the time to research new recipes for her business. When they had spare time, they enjoyed exotic holidays, and it was on the white powder sand of the Maldives that Henry proposed. Anwen had burst into tears and accepted immediately, and they’d spent the rest of that holiday on their private island mostly naked, enjoying each other as an engaged couple.           Their home life was refreshingly normal however. Behind closed doors, they were just Henry and Anwen, not the famous actor and the celebrity chef. They both took in turns to cook dinner, did the housework together and spent the evenings cwtched up on the sofa watching old movies. Laughter was a staple in their home, in fact they only ever rowed when England played Wales at rugby during the Six Nations. Life was indeed bliss, and it seemed nothing could burst this content bubble they were living in.
            One average day in late autumn, Anwen was sat at the kitchen table, with her laptop open in front of her and Ciri snoozing quietly at her feet. Dressed in a pair of comfy sweats and a loose off-the-shoulder jumper, her hair piled artfully messy on top of her head and holding a large cup of coffee in her hands, she was looking at wedding venues online, finally making a start on planning their special day. A huge binder was also open on the table with multiple sheets on paper sticking out of it. She’d made plenty of notes and had lots of ideas; it was now time to put them into action. Henry walked into the kitchen, looking very stylish in back jeans and a tight black t-shirt. He was holding Kal’s lead and the akita was tip-tapping on the tiles behind him, clearly very excited about going for a walk. Ciri didn’t even raise her head, happy enough to stay in with her mum and continue her nap. 
“I’m going to take Kal with me to the meeting with my manager,” he said to Anwen. “Then do you fancy meeting me after with Ciri and we’ll take them for a walk in the park?” 
“Yes, my love, sounds lush. How long will you be do you think?”
“Not sure, I’ll call you when I’m done.”
“Sounds like a plan!”
“What are you up to today?” Henry asked, walking over to Anwen and kissing her on the top of her head. “Wedding stuff?”
“Yeah, I’m gonna send off some emails now this morning and then go to this bakery and try out some wedding cake samples,” Anwen smiled.
“Well, I’m jealous! Have a great day honey, I’ll call you later. Love you!”
“Love you, bye!” she called as he walked out the front door.
          Henry’s meeting was going well. His manager had quite a few prospective roles lined up for him, and Henry was interested in the majority of them. His mind wandered to Anwen every so often; he still missed her when they were apart. As the meeting was coming to a close and Kal started getting excited again at going for another walk, Henry’s phone rang. He looked at the caller ID- withheld number. 
“Hello?”
“Is this Mr Henry Cavill? I’m a nurse here at London hospital. We have you down here as Miss Anwen Evans’s emergency contact.”
Henry paled. “Is she okay?”
“I’m afraid Miss Evans has been involved in a serious accident. We have her here at the emergency department. Can you get here straight away?”
          Henry had never moved so quickly in his entire life. After giving his manager a hurried explanation and asking him whether he’d look after Kal, he’d gotten in his car and sped through the streets of London, not caring that he was breaking the speed limit. He parked illegally, jumping out of the vehicle and sprinting into the hospital. His mind was in overdrive, all sorts of scenarios going through his head. He felt sick with fear and exertion. Flying into the emergency room, he looked around wildly, finding a nurse sat at the front desk.
“Anwen Evans? I’m here for Anwen Evans, I’m Henry Cavill,” he cried desperately. The nurse didn’t hesitate.
“Come with me.”
She explained to Henry what had happened on the way. “Anwen was crossing the road at a zebra crossing when she tripped halfway, according to witnesses. There was a speeding car, who didn’t see her. He… he ran right over her. He didn’t stop. There are police looking for the car and driver as we speak.”
The flash of anger that Henry felt was so severe that his steps faltered for a second. But then he pushed it away, to be dealt with later. All that mattered now was Anwen. 
“Mr Cavill, Anwen is in a bad way. She has a serious brain injury, and multiple body fractures. The trauma team managed to get her stable, but it’s touch-and-go. The next twenty-four hours are critical,” the nurse said gently. “Prepare yourself before you go in.”
She opened the door to the dimly lit room. The sound of machines beeping dominated the otherwise peaceful atmosphere. Henry moved closer to the bed, his mouth dry, hands shaking. His Annie was lying in the bed, connected to the machines, wires snaking out from every part of her it seemed. Her beautiful black hair was covered by thick white bandages wrapped around her head, and every part of her skin was purple and blue bruises. Her striking green eyes, usually so full of love and sparkle, were swollen shut. Henry had never seen anything so heartbreaking; tears coursed unbidden down his cheeks.
“Can I sit by her? Hold her hand?” he choked to the nurse. 
“Of course, pet.”
He pulled up a chair to her bedside and ever so gently took Anwen’s hand in his. It was reassuringly warm. He could do nothing for a moment but stroke it slowly. Worry filled every part of his being. 
“I’m here Annie. It’s your Henry. Come back to me, you can get through this,” he whispered, and then as sobs wracked through him, he added, “you said you’d love me until you’re gone and I’ll be damned if you’re going anywhere yet.” 
For the next few hours, Henry didn’t leave Anwen’s side; he didn’t let go of her hand. He held onto hope that she would get better. After all, porcelain could break yes, but it could also be fixed. And he would do anything to fix her. 
          As it approached eighteen hours since Anwen’s accident, a nurse came into the room and caught Henry fighting not to fall asleep. She softly tapped him on the shoulder.
“Mr Cavill, go and get some rest. You’re more than welcome to use the family room just next door. Freshen up, get an hour or so sleep. If anything changes, I promise I’ll come and notify you immediately.”
Henry considered this, torn between not wanting to leave Anwen’s side and the need to at least wash his face. 
“I’ll be half an hour, tops. Annie, I’ll be right back.” He put her hand down, and exited the room, rubbing his tired eyes as he went. 
He hadn’t been gone five minutes when a terrifying beeping screeched out from Anwen’s room. He ran out of the bathroom still with wet hands, his heart in his mouth. He halted in the doorway, petrified at the scene unfolding in front of him. 
A team of medics were working hard on her, the unrelenting beeping just adding to the frenzy of the situation. Anwen’s heart had stopped; someone fired up a defibrillator. The shock that went through her echoed in Henry. He just didn’t know what to do. He was vaguely aware of someone trying to lead him away but he just couldn’t move, couldn’t tear his eyes away, panic rising, threatening to overspill. His Annie, his Annie was there dying on that bed, and he couldn’t do anything but watch. And then suddenly, the most sinister sound yet. A flatline. Followed by a voice.
“We’ve lost her. Time of death, eight fifteen AM…”
Then silence.
The sound that tore its way up and out through Henry’s throat was that of a wounded animal. He screamed, the feeling pure agony.
“No! NO! There must be something you can do! My Annie! Annie…”
The doctor looked at him with sadness in his eyes. “I am so sorry, Henry. So sorry. Please, everyone, give him some space.”
The rest of his team followed him out; the nurse that had told Henry to go get some rest was crying silently. 
Henry stood rooted to the spot, in a state of absolute denial. Only a day before they’d been in their kitchen together, making plans to walk their beloved dogs, she was planning their wedding. Their wedding. Agony ripped through his chest, sobs wracked his body, his breathing erratic, his heart shattered, never to be healed again. Broken, like porcelain. 
          Henry didn’t know how he got through the funeral. He’d been to the funeral home, and dressed her in her favourite dress and shoes, and spent a long time brushing out her hair; he’d done that when she was alive, but the familiar act did nothing to ease his pain. When he got to the church, he walked down the aisle with her coffin on his shoulder, his heart heavy because he should have been watching her walk down the aisle in a white flowing dress towards him, he should be becoming her husband, not burying her. When it came to reading her eulogy, he was overcome with emotion, for the first time in his life not able to talk in public. His mother helped him down from the podium; his father continued the speech. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house.
At the wake, he got blind drunk. No one saw him for a week afterwards.
          The news of Anwen’s death was plastered all over the newspapers and online. Headlines such as “HENRY CAVILL FIANCE KILLED IN TRAGIC ACCIDENT” and “CELEBRITY CHEF ANWEN EVANS DEAD AT 27” accompanied photos of the both of them. The hole in Henry’s chest got bigger each time he saw it. He threw himself into his work; being someone else for at least 12 hours a day was easier than dealing with real life. Because the grief was all consuming, terrifying, never-ending. When he got home to his cold and empty penthouse, he couldn’t escape it; Kal and Ciri looked at him sadly every night, the question in their eyes: “where is our mummy?” Henry had no answers for them. He spent each evening sat in the dark, in silence. There was no laughter, no enjoyment in life since she’d gone. 
          A few weeks later, Simon came to visit. He’d been dropping in regularly, terribly worried about his friend. Henry looked, quite frankly, awful. His hair was long and the curls unkempt, he’d let his beard grow out and he had deep purple bags under his eyes. He’d lost a lot of weight too, although he hadn’t stopped working out. Simon sat down next to Henry on his sofa, nervously voicing the question he’d come round to ask.
“Henry, it’s the awards ceremony tonight. Will you be going?”
Henry looked at him like he’d gone mad. 
“Look,” Simon continued. “You’ve been nominated for Best Actor. It’s highly likely you’re going to win. Remember how she… how Anwen was really looking forward to going.” This was true. The red dress she’d been planning to wear was still hung up on the back of the bedroom door. “If you don’t want to go for yourself, why don’t you go for her?”
Henry thought it over. He hadn’t been out, apart from work and the gym, since before the accident. The thought of going to such a high-profile event caused panic. Yet… an image of Anwen, smiling before him in that red dress suddenly entered his mind. She had been so excited; she’d even helped him write his acceptance speech in case he did in fact win Best Actor. Go for her, Simon had said…
          And that’s how, just hours later, Henry found himself back on the red carpet, surrounded by flashing lights and crazed shouting as paparazzi tried to get his attention. He posed for a few photos before hurrying inside and taking his seat. He ate the extravagant three-course meal without really tasting it, drank the wine without really feeling it. Simon sat by his side, a welcome support; a truly great friend. Then, finally, it was time for the awards to be given. 
Henry clapped and cheered as each person won their nominated categories; showing his support for his fellow actors and actresses. Seeing them so happy actually lifted his spirits for the first time since… before. Then it was time for the winner of the Best Actor award.
“And the winner is… HENRY CAVILL!”
Henry sat in shock as the cameras and spotlights panned to him. Simon was on his feet, screaming “I knew he’d do it!” and then he was helping Henry up. “Go on mate, to the stage. You won, you bloody won!” 
In a daze, he walked towards the stage, then across it, accepting his award from the host. The applause was tumultuous; it took a few moments for it to die down, and then everyone in the audience was waiting expectantly for his speech. Henry drew a blank; he had no idea what to say.
“You can do it, handsome!” a heartbreakingly familiar voice whispered in his ear. He looked to the side and his breath hitched in his throat. Anwen was stood there, a wide grin all over her face, looking devastatingly beautiful in the red dress she’d planned to wear tonight. 
“I’m right here with you. I love you.”
Tears welled and spilled from Henry’s eyes as he turned back to face the audience. 
“This award,” he started. “is for my Anwen. My Annie. I couldn’t have been the actor who deserved it without her love and encouragement. She was my everything. She still is. I owe this, my entire career, my entire life to you, my angel. I miss you more than words can describe, and I love you even more.
As he left the stage to even louder applause and cheers and flashing lights, he looked up, seeing the love of his life again, smiling, tears sparkling on her cheeks, blowing him a kiss as she faded away.
“Goodbye my Annie,” he whispered. “Goodbye.”
104 notes · View notes
jocia92 · 3 years
Link
(Google translated)
Dan Stevens, who grew up in Wales and south-east England, spent his summer holidays at the National Youth Theater at the age of 15, and he was drawn to the stage while studying English in Cambridge. Since his big breakthrough as Matthew Crawley in the hit series “Downton Abbey”, he has also repeatedly appeared in films such as “Inside Wikileaks - The Fifth Force”, “At Night in the Museum: The Secret Tomb” or “Beauty and the Beast” . Most recently, Stevens played the Russian Schnösel singer Lemtov in the Oscar-nominated comedy “Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga” from Netflix. At the beginning of June, the German film “Ich bin dein Mensch” by Maria Schrader celebrated at the Summer Berlinale Premiere, which starts on 1.7. comes to German cinemas regularly. Stevens plays the role of a love robot in it. Unlike on the screen, however, the 38-year-old prefers to speak English in the zoom-conducted interview. He chose a brick wall with a lion motif as the digital background. No allusion to the song “Lion of Love” from “Eurovision Song Contest”, but a photo of the famous Ishtar Gate in Berlin’s Pergamon Museum, where “I am your human” was filmed last summer.
Mr. Stevens, in your new film “I am your human” you play a humanoid robot that is entirely geared towards fulfilling the romantic needs of a skeptical scientist. You yourself recently described the film as “delightfully German”. How did you mean that?
I wanted to say that here pretty big questions - such as what actually makes a person or how much perfection love can take - are negotiated in a very light-footed, elegant and sometimes humorous way. In my experience that is a very German quality. At least I have often seen with many of my German colleagues and friends that they are very good at not discussing difficult issues exclusively deadly serious and melancholy.
Where does your personal connection to Germany and the German language come from?
My parents had friends who lived in Bielefeld and we used to visit them in North Rhine-Westphalia during the school holidays. Traveled from England by car! That’s how I learned a little German as a child, and later I learned it as a subject at school. I even did a short internship there through our friends in Bielefeld. I really love the language. Funnily enough, I was later able to use my knowledge of German professionally, because my first film was “Hilde”, in which I was next to Heike Makatsch played the British actor and director David Cameron, who was married to Hildegard Knef. After that, I always hoped that there might be another chance to speak German in front of the camera, because playing in a foreign language is an exciting challenge. When the chance arose to shoot “I am your person”, I could hardly believe my luck.
Did you know the director Maria Schrader who gave you this chance?
Funnily enough, when the script for the film landed on my table, I had just watched the Netflix series “Unorthodox”, which she directed. I had also watched a few episodes of “Deutschland 89”. In general, I knew that she was a great German actress, not least because friends who knew their way around the German theater scene often raved about her. Working with her was a joy now. Her understanding of actors is quite instinctive and brilliant. I have seldom seen someone who can help an actor who is having difficulties with a scene with such simple means.
The fact that you had already seen “Unorthodox” shows, of course, how quickly “I am your person” must have been implemented in the past year …
Oh yes, that was really quick. In March I was still in New York and was about to premiere a new play on Broadway. But then the pandemic came, everything was canceled and I flew back to my family in Los Angeles. A few weeks later, Maria and I met each other via Zoom - and shortly afterwards I was sitting outside in a café in the Berlin June sun for the first time in months to discuss the upcoming shoot with her. That was pretty surreal because I hadn’t actually left the house since March.
Is it correct that you oriented yourself to Cary Grant and Jimmy Stewart to portray the romantically programmed robot Tom?
In any case, these were role models that Maria and I spoke about. When you think of the game between the two of them, you always see an enormous clarity and directness. Cary Grant, for example, was always quite funny, especially in his romantic roles, but also flawless in an almost artificial way from today’s perspective. I found that very suitable for a robot. Apart from the fact that the ideas that Tom and his algorithm have of romance and love are certainly also shaped by the classic romantic comedies from Hollywood. Oh, the woman is sad, so I’ll bring her flowers! Such automatisms from the stories from back then were very appropriate for Tom now.
Keyword role models: Who shaped you in your career as an actor?
There were of course many. Jimmy Stewart was certainly something of a role model. My mom and I watched a lot of his films when I was little and I was always impressed by the kind of sweet tragedy that went into all of his roles. But maybe Robin Williams’ work influenced me even more. I always found the incredible variety of his films remarkable. He could make his audience laugh hysterically like no other, but also move them to tears in other roles. I always wanted to emulate this range.
In fact, the range of your roles is enormous and ranges from the Disney blockbuster “Beauty and the Beast” to a comic adaptation in series format such as “Legion” to bulky independent films such as “Her Smell” or the horror thriller “The Rental “, Which we just released on DVD. Is there a method behind this diversity?
Not in principle. I like variety, but I’m not just looking for roles that are as different as possible from one another. Rather, there are always similar factors that I use to select my projects. Sometimes there is a certain director that I really want to work with. Or the role itself is irresistible because it presents me with acting challenges. And sometimes a script is just fantastically written and I am interested in the topics it is about. With “I am your person” it was definitely the latter, especially since the timing was just right. In 2020 there were so many societal questions that ultimately touched the core of human existence. Such a script, which deals with something very similar in a light-footed way, was just fitting.
A few years ago you said in a questionnaire from the British Guardians that your greatest weakness was not being able to make up your mind. So every time you are offered a role, do you ponder whether you should accept?
No, no, when a script appeals to me, it actually does it very quickly. It’s such a gut feeling. If I’m unsure and skeptical, that’s a good indicator that this is not the right thing for me. That with the difficulty in making decisions related rather to something else. For example, it takes me forever to order in a restaurant because I can never decide what on the menu appeals to me the most.
You became famous with the role of Matthew Crawley in the series "Downton Abbey”. Did you immediately suspect at the time that something big was going on?
At first we were all pretty clueless. There are really many British history series, and we were one of them. When the first season aired in the US and was a huge success there, it was pretty unexpected. I never expected the impact the series would have on my career.
Barely ten years later, are you still being asked about the role?
Oh yes, regularly. Probably nothing will change about that either. I got out after three seasons!
In the meantime, however, the flamboyant Russian singer Alexander Lemtov from “Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga” should also be a character with whom you will be immediately associated, right?
Right, it has been mentioned more and more recently when people recognize me on the street. This charming, silly film obviously had a nerve with the audience last year in the middle of the corona pandemic. Especially since the real Eurovision Song Contest had been canceled.
The film was the number one topic of conversation on the Internet for a while - and Lemtov GIFs and memes were everywhere. Did you follow that?
It was really hard to avoid it. I wasn’t looking specifically for what people were posting. But of course my friends passed a lot on to me, and there were already some very funny Lemtov things. But he’s also a figure made for GIFs.
Another question every British actor under 40 has to put up with these days: Would you like to become the next James Bond?
Oh, of course, everyone gets to hear this question again and again who meets certain criteria. But it is completely hypothetical. Although a few years ago I read in an audio book by Ian Fleming’s “Casino Royale”.
You mentioned earlier that you and your family have lived in the United States for a long time. How big is your homesickness?
I actually feel very comfortable in Los Angeles. But every now and then I miss the sidewalk culture of European cities. People on foot, street cafes, things like that. Last year the longing for it was particularly great, although it was of course clear to me that there was a state of emergency in Europe too. In any case, I found myself reading books that were set in Europe and made me homesick. Which is why the unexpected trip to Berlin was really a boon.
You are also an avid cricketer. That’s certainly difficult in Los Angeles, isn’t it?
There are quite a few cricket clubs here. The only problem is that the few people who do the sport here are so good at it that I have problems keeping up. That’s why I always lose sight of the matter here a little. Even as a pure TV viewer, it is not easy to stay on the ball, because of course there is no cricket broadcast here at prime time. But as soon as I’m home in England in the summer, I really want to play again!
12 notes · View notes
rangergranger11 · 4 years
Text
Headcanons (I promise these won’t make you cry)
Ok so on @eatyourdamnpears post there were a lot of headcanons, and I decided to put them all in one post, but just bear in mind, half of this is credit to @thedarkestcrew cuz she did some amazing HCs, and I’m by no means stealing hers, just putting it all in a better place.
- Liam sends packages to Ruby because he can't make a fool out of himself in person so it's the next best thing. 
-These packages include things like hand writing notes, stuffed animals, any ruby jewellery he finds, pictures of them on dates that he printed (he has matching pictures and keeps them under his bed)( Cole and Harry find them but it's too cute to tease him), and finally, videos to make her laugh
- He also keeps a menu from Ruby Tuesday, and LOADS of old CDs and rock band t shirts
-Cole and him borrow each others jackets all the time and it's not a problem because they live in the same house and they can just go over to the room next door, 
-But when ruby starts stealing Liam’s jackets that he stole from Cole? well now the Stewart house is missing 10 leather jackets and you can't just get them form the girl who lives a state away. So she has to send them back in the mail,
-keeps a few that smell like Liam because she can
-sometimes people are confused which Stewart brother Ruby is really dating. And the fact that they look like twins it adds to the confusion, and the Ruby and Cole literally love to watch people get so mixed up
-oh absolutely, they’ll walk in on ruby and Liam making out, but two second later see Cole smoothing Down her hair and calling her Gem, AND seeing her he friendly with Chubs and cleaning his glasses because her skirt has better fabric for it, AND seeing her joke around with Nico
-it becomes a bet to see who she's with
-Liam will give Ruby his jacket, but than Cole comes and notices it's his jacket and makes a joke about them dating, she just gives him the jacket because she'd rather wear lee'. bystanders are distraught
-  And then Clancy comes along and brags about how he kissed Ruby and then the people who bet are just like 'where. the. hell. did. clancy. frickin. gray. come. from???
-Ruby thinks most of the rumours are funny and will be really vague about who her boyfriend is. most of the time just seeing Ruby and Liam together will be enough for people to figure it out by how the are relaxed around each other and look lovingly at the other.
-But when she hears the Clancy rumour she shuts that down faster than Charles scarfs Down a pancake
- Also, Liam's mum and Harry have an ongoing bet about who Ruby is actually dating because it's just so confusing at this point. Grace is like 'are you blind???' and Harry Is like 'there's something with Cole, I swear!!' But eventually realised its Liam and gives in
- Grace thinks she’s dating Cole, because when she visited she hugged Cole first and than a minute later hugged Liam. Yes, she went out to the park with Liam but grace doesn't know that, also she spend 20 minutes in Coles room chatting. She thinks Liam just has a crush on her or something 
- Ruby's parents can't tell them apart for anything and made a rule of " announce who you are before talking" after Liam kissed Ruby on the cheek and her mom thought that was the same person who told someone to go-F themselves ten minutes ago and nearly faints. It takes them a while the even figure out there are two blond southern men that flirt with their daughter
 -Grace is always giving Liam encouraging mom advice like, 'there are always others' and 'you'll get there someday' and Liam is just like 'thanks, mom'
-Ruby's dad is just so tired of confusing Liam and Cole, he's like 'Stewart sr' and 'Stewart jr.' He tried to call them 'Ruby's boyfriend' and Ruby's friend, but Cole answered to both just for the fun of it
-Chubs does not think it's funny at all and spits out what he's drinking when he sees Cole look when her dad says ' Ruby's boyfriend'. almost strangles Ruby until he hears about it. 
-Vida thinks it's really funny but event breaks and tells everyone it's a joke the day after. she doesn't know how many more times she can see Liam pouting
-After the Cole fiasco is over. his parents wait about a week and try to get Liam with Ruby. it's a bunch of prep talks, buying new clothes, telling him how to not mess up. when the big date comes her kisses her as a hello and they feel betrayed
-When ruby’s dad says the jr, sr thing he has Harry looking too and now he just needs to have ruby in the room with him, whoever’s face gets softer Is Liam, the one who stands up to tease her about something is Cole
-One day they talk about it and their 70 percent sure it’s Cole because they think he’s more her type while Liam would be good for her. Anyways they see her making out with Liam and are shocked and think she’s cheating on Cole.
-Harry had to sit Cole down and explain that Ruby isn’t faithful and Cole is absolutely loving it. He’s eating it all up, goes along with it, calls ruby in-front of him and ‘breaks up with her’, she also thinks it’s hilarious because for crying out loud it’s been a few month into the new program and why not see how long they can keep going. I swear they have a whole plot on how they met, what line made them fall in love the, whole 9 yards. 
-Grams knows of course because she pulled her aside and threatened her to date Liam because he’s the poster ’ nice southern boy’. Liam does not enjoy his girl friend pretending to date his brother but she throws enough Liam flirting into the mix to make it even.
- when Cole ‘breaks up’ with her, they have a fully fledged fake argument, like ‘remember that time when we got ice cream and you told me you told me you loved me’ and ‘you never loved me!!’ And for Ruby this is easy, because let’s face it Ruby is a grade A liar (in a good way) and Cole should be a 5 star actor because he is so damn dramatic. 
-Harry is totally buying this, and in the end they confess to their parents that Ruby + Cole was never a thing, and Liam is just looking at his mum like ‘SEE, I TOLD YOU I WASN’T A TOTAL LOSER’ and poor Grace just bakes a bunch of things just to make it up to him, and they all have a laugh about it. 
-But it was getting to the point where Ruby’s parents asked Zu which one she was dating and she was like ‘I am not getting involves in this.’ and Cole is just giving her a discreet thumbs up for playing her part while she just rolls her eyes.
-Oh absolutely they get into it, everyone who knows their lying get popcorn and treat it like its a movie. Cole says something absolutely ridiculous like “ you can take my heart, and my dignity, but I’m taking back the popcorn I gave you that one time” and Ruby has to use all of her enegery to not burst out laughing. 
-Ruby can also fake cry quickly so she’s sobbing, and by the end schools her face within a second and wipes away to tears Cooly. Ruby’s mom can’t trust her after that. also still kinda doesnt belive she’s dating anyone because of the Cole thing. Liam comes over 5 times before she’s convinced that this isn’t another prank. Ruby tells her she’s going on a date Saturday and says “ ha ya alright I’m not falling for that again” and than on saturday spends 6 minutes looking around the house for her before calling her and realizing that she wasent kidding
-Vida definitely films the whole thing like it's some telenovela, while Chubs is rolling her eyes at her but Zu secretly loves the drama and her stupid family. And Rubiam parents mention this at their wedding as well like, Ruby's dad would be doing a speech 'today we are gathered for the union of my daughter and Cole- Liam, i meant Liam. Its definitely Liam. Right Ruby??'
-Cole shows up to Haven for a visit about to yell at Liam and Ruby for not inviting him sooner after Harry and Grace let the location slip
( I know cole being dead is one of the things that sparked haven being made on liams part, but let's just say the spark for haven was Ruby getting harassed and Liam not being able to see her like that and asking her to run away with him to the middle of no where. Good? Great)
-Cole is about to walk through the door before a kid puts a frog in his hand and another kid asks if he can beat the level on his game boy.
-he thinks it's really adorable and the kids start calling him Liam for a Few minutes so why not,
-anyways he sneezes in a lone hallway and lights something small on fire before quickly putting it out.
-Owen is coming out of his room but sees the panic in Coles eyes and says ' hey, I'm not one to judge' and walks back into his room.
-When Ruby gets home she stops and stares at him for a full minute like " that's..... not Liam????"
-he calls her gem and she can't decide between jumping a hug onto him or punching him.
-Liam gets home and the kids all do a double take like ' you changed shirts??? can got a hair cut????' before doing a double take between the two
-Loads of the kids gather around and start making daisy chains for Cole’s hair, and he freaking loves it.
-He’s surprisingly good with kids as they all hover around him asking questions, holding his hand and showing him random things and it warms Ruby’s heart so much
Again, credit to @thedarkestcrew for thinking all of this, and this post has been fun 
41 notes · View notes
prose-for-hire · 4 years
Text
The ghost of romance future
Part Two // Part Three
Pairing: Spike x reader (gender neutral, I will specify fem! or male! if otherwise)
Request: reader is slightly older than the scoobies and really protective of them, especially buffy. The reader hates spike because of how he's bragged about killing slayers in the past. However, a while after he gets the chip, they start to grow on each other, and eventually fall for each other. Sort of an enemies to lovers type of deal. I really really love your stories, I think they might just be my favorite btvs fics fr. Even if you don't do this request, thanks for all the great writing! ❤
Requested by: Anon
Warnings: Swearing. There’s a little heated kissing but idk if that needs a warning lol
A/N: Flattery will get u everywhere with me apparently. Kind asks totally get my inspiration flowing, also Spike and enemies to lovers. So, to sum up, this was one heavenly request for me!
Tumblr media
Sunnydale was surprisingly quiet at the moment which meant bad things were probably on the horizon. You were smiling as you did your night-time routine though, thinking about something Spike had said to you that evening at the Bronze which had made you laugh. He was growing on you, ever since the Initiative chipped him, he had been a lot more fun to be around. You didn’t really like him when you first met, you weren’t even convinced by him a few months ago, but now you found yourself almost enjoying his company. Platonically, of course.
That night, as you started to get into bed the temperature in the room started to chill. It was as if you had unknowingly walked into a freezer. You jumped, dropping the sheet you had pulled back for you to slip into as a voice boomed out of nowhere, echoing against each wall in the room. You turned to see a ghost staring straight at you. Great, just what you needed.
“You will be visited by three ghosts tonight. The ghosts of romance beginning, possible and destiny” The figure spoke, apparently the powers that be were getting tired of you and Spike dancing around each other and decided to take direct action.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“The first apparition shall arrive when the clock strikes one” The figure spoke as it disappeared before your eyes. You groaned, you really didn’t need to see some warped Christmas Carol-style look at your past dates. But, that wasn’t what this was. As you fell deep into a sleep you had been fighting so that the apparition wouldn’t get its way, you had a dream. It was very similar to that of a prophetic dream you may or may not have been pretending to read about at a Scooby meeting a day previous.
The Beginning:
The first scene was a memory of yours from a while ago, which really was just lazy haunting on the spectre’s part. It was one of the times that you had finished shouting at Spike for being just plain nasty to your younger friends. You were a few years older than the other Scoobies, making you the protective, ‘parent’ friend. Any advice, worries or study support and you were there. You particularly worried about Buffy, the responsibility she held got her down sometimes and you felt protective of her as if she was your little sister. You wished you could protect her from everything that came her way.
When Spike, having ignored your rant, started to follow Buffy through a darkened graveyard, you stepped out. You had no super-strength, no secret powers, but you did have an attitude and a protective streak. So you blocked his path.
“No”
“Wh-”
“Just no, Spike. Leave her alone” You warned. He enjoyed taunting her with threats and stories of his past exploits, especially gruesomely detailing the way he killed slayers in the past.
“I was just gonna offer my services”
“There are no services you can provide that are gonna make Buffy listen to you. Go home”
“Jealousy looks cute on you, pet”
“Just – go” You warned. He smirked, moving in. He grabbed your upper arm, a mean look as he pulled you into him so he could whisper in your ear. But you thought fast, “Ow! Ow that really hurts!” You hissed, wincing and shaking in pain as he dropped your arm and started to clutch his own head in agony. He hadn’t realised he had gripped your arm that tight. Bloody breakable human bones.
But you straightened up as he started to clutch his head, smiling a satisfied grin before winking. He hadn’t hurt you. You had been pretending, which still fired off the chip because he thought he had caused pain.
“I bloody hate you!” he shouted, still rubbing his head, “Spiteful fucking bitch” He seethed, pointing at you angrily. Wishing he could twist your arm out of its socket and cause excruciating pain you had just given him. He stalked off, the opposite direction from both you and Buffy which had been your goal to begin with, so you were satisfied.
The Possibility:
The second dream sequence was, again, some pretty lazy ghosting in your opinion. It was you and Spike at the magic box last week. You found yourselves sat together as the others excitably skipped to the dance floor. You and Spike were left nursing your drinks together.
“Alright, love?” he asked as you watched the others with a little smile. You weren’t so much older, but old enough that you looked at them fondly as if you were reminiscing about being as carefree as them in your youth. They didn’t get the chance often and you saw Buffy and Riley dancing together which made you happy for her. She needed something like this, something more stable.
“Yeah, it’s just a nice evening” You smiled at Willow and Tara as they gave you a little wave, shaking your head as they tried again to get you to join them and dance.
“Too right, bagged more than one demon and the onion flower’s back on the menu” Spike said, looking over at the bar. He wasn’t too bothered by what the others were doing.
“Onion flower?”
“Don’t tell me you haven’t tried it”
“I haven’t” you shrugged, sipping on your soda. As much as you enjoyed partying with the others, you wanted to keep an eye out and get them all home safe at the end of the night. They were mostly new to drinking so you wanted to be on hand and sober if there were any disasters.
“You haven’t lived! Bloody brilliant, they soak it in water first then fry it – shallow – on both sides until golden”
You were staring at the dance floor as he spoke animatedly, his hands gesturing, clearly this was a particular favourite of his. You looked at him, an amused smile on your face. It made his face harden, he hadn’t realised how carried away he had gotten. He looked a bit embarrassed and you couldn’t help the genuine smile that spread across your face.
“Hey, that sounds pretty cool” You offered him, he was clearly expecting you to make fun of him or run to the microphone at the front and announce loud to the entire Bronze that he was actually really lame and not at all scary. He looked at you for a moment, almost as if he wanted to say something more. Offer more than the usual insults you both traded, but he just got up to get himself another drink – not offering to buy you a round.
However, Spike came back with a smug grin and an onion flower which he set in front of you. You couldn’t help smiling softly at his enthusiasm, it was almost endearing. His face faltered as he saw the way you were looking at him, he felt something suspiciously close to affection rising in his chest, connecting through clusters of nerves throughout his entire body. This was when he realised he liked you. He really liked you. Oh no.
The Destiny:
The third ghost brought you somewhere that was not yet in your memory, but you were very pleased with the way it made you feel. It was unusual, you felt older but nothing about Sunnydale had apparently changed. Spike was in your apartment, a place he had never been invited before but he walked around the place as if he knew it. As if it were his own house.
It was like you were watching a romantic film, the anticipation whether the love interest would kiss you being almost painful. You were staring at him as he moved around your kitchen with ease, making you a hot drink and taking some blood from your fridge. You yearned for him and could tell he felt the same. The subtle glances, the desire for the other’s touch.
He smiled when he saw you watching, you walked into the kitchen, taking your cup and sipping it slowly. It was made exactly how you like it. Spike moved so that he was looping his arms around your waist from behind. You hummed, staring out of the window into the cool night. You felt calm, safe. Something you had never thought about with Spike but you had a feeling that after this dream, it was all you were going to be feeling.
“I’m so glad I’ve got you, love… never thought we’d actually do it mind”
“I could never imagine my life without loving you, Spike. It just feels so right” You found your mouth moving of its own accord.
“Mm, and a little wrong… in a good way” he smirked, moving into your neck as he mumbled the words. He pressed some soft kisses there as he thought about the way you had become his. He loved you, not able to stop himself grinning like an idiot when you were around him still. The strangest part was that you knew he loved you and your feelings complimented his perfectly. 
“In the best way” You confirmed, finding yourself smiling. You set the mug down, knowing what was coming as he spun you around to face him. He smirked, eyeing you as you smiled in anticipation.
There was that familiar look in his eye before he moved in, you felt blunt teeth grazing your neck, your own breathy moans ricocheting around the room as you grasped at his shirt. You clutched at strands of his blonde hair, his kisses heated but with an underlying affection he could never shake when it came to you. he pressed you against the kitchen counter, laying kisses so hot they felt as if they were marking your skin, his lips branding you as his. They were on yours now, you moaned into his mouth as his hands started to roam and this is where the dream ended. 
It was disappointing, the anticipation was killing you and you longed for this to be real some day. You woke with a start, jolting up in bed. You woke to find yourself alone in your apartment, desperately missing Spike’s touch. His kiss. His love.
Whatever had been going on last night, you were sure you would never see Spike the same again and honestly, you didn’t really want to.
172 notes · View notes