#i am Completely speechless at how incredible this was. holy shit

[shima-draws]

I. I finished the game

[rockitmans]

Ellipsis

A/N: This one is for @jazziergin who stumped me in the fic line game. She helpfully asked for Soulmate AU with a twist, obviously an easy thing to embody in a drabble 😛

But here we go, at least it's less than 1k this time. Hope you enjoy, love! Not convinced this counts as a twist but hopefully this is something different.

~~~~~~~

An ellipsis. That's what Kurt has tattooed across his wrist in the place that is meant to display the first words your soulmate says to you. A classic dot dot dot. The most mocking collection of punctuation ever conceived of. 

He has theories. But most of those theories all kind of point firmly in the same direction. He's probably destined to die alone. Even if the ellipsis is meant to indicate something, how is Kurt ever going to find the person that is embodied by something as abstract as a pause? 

He determinedly doesn't think about it when he gets to college. Either he'll find his soulmate or he won't. All he can do is keep an open mind and give himself the best possible chance of finding The One. He even signs up for an English Lit class with the absolute mammoth leap of logic that Lit students are much more likely to use an ellipsis in everyday speech than your average person. Like that’s something that’s likely or even possible to achieve.

He may be losing his mind. 

He regrets the decision immediately when he finds out the lecture is at eight am. He slumps in clutching his coffee and thinking fondly of his bed. He should drop this stupid class. It's way too early and he signed up for dubious reasons and they're reading Lolita for God's sake.  He doesn't need that kind of toxicity in his life. 

The bad mood lasts until the exact second an incredibly cute guy slips into the seat next to Kurt. Dark curls and warm eyes and a tiny waist that Kurt kind of wants to wrap his hands around. Cute Guy tosses an absent smile of greeting in Kurt's direction and it's the most radiant thing Kurt has ever seen. Holy fuck. He thinks he's halfway in love already. 

Kurt wants to say something, but is not caffeinated enough to manage witty repartee and this guy is hot enough to make him feel speechless on a good day. Instead, he goes to nod and then tries to change it to a wave. The result is that he just kind of twitches violently. Fuck. He’s lost it. A guy smiles at him and he’s completely lost it. He quickly grabs his coffee to try and cover for whatever the hell that just was and tries to pretend he’s anywhere else. 

The guy touches his arm, three gentle taps with his finger, and Kurt's eyes snap up, only to be surprised when a notepad is slipped in front of him with a single line of text. 

I'm Blaine. I'm not ignoring you, I just can't talk. 

Kurt blinks, frowning. And then he watches Blaine get his phone out and start up a text to speech app and it clicks. Oh. He gives Blaine a thumbs up and Blaine smiles slightly and touches his ear. Right. Blaine can hear. Which means that Kurt doesn’t have to resort to gestures as well. But he’s an idiot. So of course he did. He genuinely can’t wait for this hour to be over so he can go and walk into a deep fog never to be seen again. 

He does his best to focus on the lecture for the simple fact that the professor seems to be the sort to pick on people at random and he’s already suffered enough humiliation for the day without being caught not paying attention. It’s hard though. He can’t stop stealing glances at Blaine. He feels like he can’t breathe. His pulse is racing. He seriously wonders if he might be coming down with the flu or something.

He’s only dragged back into the moment by the most garbage take he’s ever heard a human being utter so confidently in a room full of total strangers. People usually save that shit for twitter.

"Humbert Humbert being a misunderstood genius is not the hot take I expected to be subjected to today," Kurt mutters before he can stop himself. 

He hears the intake of breath. He practically feels the way Blaine stills beside him. And then Blaine moves in a flurry, tugging up his sleeve to expose his wrist, shoving it under Kurt’s nose. Humbert Humbert being a misunderstood genius is not the hot take I expected to be subjected to today, it says in slanting script.

Kurt's mouth drops open. Blaine gestures, pointing at Kurt's wrist, a question in his eyes. Kurt slowly turns his hand over to show the three dots neatly pressed against his pulse. Blaine frowns and starts to sign something out before remembering. He grabs his notebook instead, scrawling out some quick sentences. 

Disappointed but not surprised to learn the soulmate system is so ableist. It can't even be bothered to have the first words I write to you? Unbelievable. 

Kurt laughs. Mostly out of shock and relief and the feeling of a heavy weight being lifted so suddenly it's like he could float away. All this time he assumed that the dots meant his soulmate would never speak to him for the worst of reasons. But his soulmate is right here. Blaine is here. Blaine is his. He’s literally won the soulmate lottery. 

"I thought you didn't exist," he whispers. "Because of this."

Blaine's eyes soften and he lightly brushes his fingers over the offending dots. But I found you, he writes. 

"You found me," Kurt repeats shakily. And maybe that's where he was going wrong this whole time. Years spent fretting over what the dots meant and doubting that he was ever going to find his soulmate.

It just turned out that all along his soulmate was meant to find him.

[beels-burger-babe]

I made a physical collection of your completed works in your master list!!

Its all hand bound by me!! It’s my first time binding a book like this but I enjoyed it and think it turned out pretty well! As i’m sure you can see the foil for the cover did give me some trouble in certain areas (*cough* the stupid spine *cough cough*) and there were a few printing errors but all in all im happy with how it turned up it and I hope you like it as well :))

I just want to remind you that I support you Bee, don’t feel bad about not being able to write as often or anything like that, we want what’s best for you B! No matter what, I appreciate you and want to thank you for all you do for us here in the hive, I couldn’t ask for a better online space. I hope you always remember to take care of yourself, drink some water, and don’t stress about us, we’re happy with whatever you do :))

Simon ... It is not an exaggeration when I say I just got done weeping like fucking baby over this. Oh my goodness. This is absolutely STUNNING. I am so fucking honoured. Like- I'm just speechless. This is GORGEOUS This is the first time I've ever seen my writing in a hard copy and holy shit. I can't put into words how grateful I am to see both this book and the words you've sent. I've had a really really hard month mentally, and this just- Fuck man. This is so freaking mindblowing and thoughtful and honestly feels like a dream. I want to hug you so freaking bad! Seriously, this is so so incredible and I truly and deeply am so proud and happy about this. You have made my entire week. I love you so so dearly. You mean the WORLD to me 💗🫂

[hotliljewishgirl]

Post-Jangle Ball Ramblings

I saw JB in Philly last night and it left me genuinely speechless. It was my first time ever seeing them live after ten years of obsessing over their content from afar, and it was everything I could have asked for or dreamed of. I HIGHLY encourage anyone who’s on the fence to get tickets. You won’t regret it.

Starkid means so much to me. I cannot begin to list all the ways they’ve helped me and changed me, and last night represented the fulfillment of a dream I’ve had since I was nine years old. I won’t get too corny here, mostly because nothing I could say would do justice to how much I love these artists and this community, but I wanted to say – thank you to everyone who made the past ten years of being a Starkid fan so special.

Bear with me here, because I have a lot of Feelings. Be aware this post does contain spoilers for Jangle Ball. Without further ado, my thoughts:

We been knew, but everyone is SO talented and seeing them perform was a magical, life-changing, incredible, unforgettable experience.

Also everyone looked ridiculously good and I am not ok. The variation in outfits was hilarious though. I’m not sure what they were told to wear, but it ranged from Lauren in a very sexy sheer top to Jamie in a festive red dress to Dylan just chilling in flannel. None of them looked like they were going to the same event and I loved it.

Janaya’s Stutter was iconic and I want to listen to it on repeat. Lauren’s background dancing was equally amazing despite the fact it induced a severe state of gay panic.

I wish we got more Show Stopping Number from Joey and James. I wasn’t sure anyone other than R*bert would be able to pull off that song and I’ve never been happier to be wrong. I actually think either of them would make a great Hidgens if Nick doesn’t want to take on the role.

Dylan blew me away. I knew he talented but tbh he completely stole the show in the first act with the Twisted numbers. Not only does he have an incredible voice, but his stage presence is ridiculous (and I made eye contact with him briefly. My life is complete. Now I can finally lay down and die.)

I loved the Status Quo parody and I was so glad to see JOEY perform it again (no shade to Alex and Mariah but they just can’t compare to the OG). I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – if they pulled a Taylor Swift and re-recorded all their old cast albums I would literally give them all my money. I love the old songs and it was so special to see them performed.

Queen B…I think I briefly blacked out. I honestly don’t listen to that song much because I’m not really one for rap, but I might start now. Lauren killed it. My favorite thing about her as a performer is how versatile she is. Not every one can pull off a number like that, but she did it effortlessly. I was equal parts terrified and aroused, which is exactly what that song should do. Shout out to Brian and James dancing backup. The dancing in this show truly blew me away. I was not expecting that many choreographed numbers given how little they rehearsed, and I’m so glad (and impressed) that they managed to do it. It just brought the energy up and was so fun to watch.

A lil nitpick: I get that Cup of Roasted Coffee, Stutter, Show Stopping Number, and the Wiggly Jingle are technically villain songs but they don’t really give that energy? And Deck the Halls, We Got Work to Do, Climate Change, and Status Quo are straight up not villain songs. I liked the whole “ the villain is capitalism” angle but tbh when I heard they were performing villain songs I was expecting like…Wagon on Fire. Rogues Medley. Kick It Up a Notch. The classic Starkid villain songs, you know? I LOVED the set list as it was and I wouldn’t trade it for anything but I think there was a tiny flaw in marketing. And now I’ll get off my soapbox.

I try to keep my Richpez shipping off this blog but holy shit, I need to freak out for a minute. In person or through a screen, their love, pride, affection for each other is palpable. They way Lauren looks at Joey while he’s performing, the casual touches, the way he kept trying to make her break on stage…it brought tears to my eyes. And that’s not even touching on Priceless. Seeing them dancing together and holding each other like that in front of hundreds of people broke me. I’m so happy for them, not only that they have each other but also that they feel comfortable sharing it with us. The same goes for Breredith (the kiss in Final Ghost was both completely unnecessary and a fantastic addition)

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the band. The music was on point. I don’t know if they wrote new arrangements for the tour, but I did notice it was very “beat-heavy” (is that a thing??) which made it very fun and easy to dance along – perfect for a concert. Also, AJ’s number was fucking incredible and I’m so glad I got to see him sing. It literally gave me AVPSY flashbacks. He’s only gotten more talented since then. I wish we could see him in more Starkid shows. Lastly, I will never stop thanking Clark for writing VHSCC. It’s a energetic, touching, unique take on a familiar story and by far my favorite adaptation of CC. I want him to write more music for Starkid shows.

Thanks for reading my stream of consciousness if you’ve gotten this far. I’m going to post another one for act two (because otherwise this post is going to be way too long).

[euphorial-docx]

ok so i just finished opev for the first time and im just like-- speechless. honestly after watching call me by your name and having mixed feelings on it i was kinda skeptical to read this, but holy shit this was absolutely incredible--

just like, everything from the characterisations to how u wrote regulus's autism (sorry if that sounds strange but it's just so refreshing to see it written so, idk, naturally is amazing. i just love the way u wrote him and i relate to him a lot and it was so nice to see tbh) and the settings was incredible. like the way u can make people feel so completely invested with your wordings is incredible, and feels a lot like some of the scenes in cmbyn which i love, bc if there's one thing i like about that film it's the settings. like, i have never been to italy in my life and barely speak a word of italian, but i am now confident ik it like the back of my hand now just bc of your writing.

the ending did make me cry a little but it was so beautiful i honestly didn't really mind, sorry for the fangirling i'm just in awe rn, and i'm very excited for the sequel!!!!!

hope you're well!! <333

i’m doing well, thank you so much!!! and thank you for taking a chance on my fic despite your mixed feelings about the movie/book— i definitely have some too, by the way. most of my love for it is the movie and the directing, and wayy less about the actual “romance” it depicts, you know?

i wish i could say i had this grand method for writing characterizations, especially with regulus and his autism, but i just… wrote what i felt was right? i didn’t write his character with the goal to make him autistic, i just wrote a character that happened to be autistic. maybe it’s just me, but i hate when autistic characters are clearly written to be this kind of exaggerated caricature of what neurotypical people think autistics are like. like… we are capable of complexities! but i think that’s a rant for another day lmao.

but about the setting: i did write this story with a goal, just a goal of learning, really. my great-grandma is from trieste, and my grandma was born there, so i used this fic basically as an excuse to do some research about where my family came from. maybe the sense of immersion just comes from my passion while researching lol.

i’m glad you like the ending, even if it made you cry! happy-ish tears were what i was going for.

[fictionissocialinquiry]

FISI’s Favourite Zutara Fics

A lil late for ZFAW’s Saturday prompt, sorry about that! Haven’t had any internet over the weekend. But better late than never!

I’m not gonna lie… a lot of these are angsty af. But I promise you they’re not gratuitous angst! They’re well written, beautiful stories that will make you feel like a better person for having read them. These are my favourite all time fics, ones I’ve read more than once and will continue to read (even though I’m taking a week break from fandom and fic).

 Multi-Chaptered Fics

The Sparrowkeet Series by audreyii_fic

To be honest, this story’s summary doesn’t do it justice so I ain’t including it. Originally a one shot, Sparrowkeet is headcanon for me now. Move over canon, this is where it’s at. Audreyii_fic’s characterisation, world building, and writing is exquisite. It’s incredible. She manages to channel the same fun and whimsical energy from the show while allowing the characters to grow and develop to places I wish they had actually been taken.

This one is a fandom Must Read and one I return to regularly.

 Clothe Me in Seasons, Dress Me in Snow by sadladybug

It is not the memorial she deserves, nor the one she would want. But it can't be helped. He owns no property in the other nations, and he needed to keep her close. Closer than she was in life, anyway.

Zuko's reflections on a life lived and a life that could have been.

This is one of the best written fics I’ve ever read. It’s tragic and deep and will hurt you in all the tender places but you would be doing yourself a favour if you read this. There’s a real bittersweet feeling to it and the love between them is just… urg, visceral.

 Lovable by LadyCharity

Zuko knew that he could not save Azula. He could only try to forgive her. Fittingly enough, those two were one in the same.

I love stories that make Zutara their centerpiece but every now but then a story like this comes along. A story where their relationship builds almost incidentally because the plot and character development straight up hijack your emotions. I got so invested in this story. Zuko is amazingly well characterised and his complicated thoughts and feelings around his father and Azula are incredibly well written!

 One Shots

Lunar Ephemerality by @formerlygoldilocks (goldilocks23)

After multiple failed attempts on his life and years of self-set expectations, Fire Lord Zuko is a shell of the man he used to be. But Katara won't turn her back on those who need her.

I really didn’t expect this to hit as hard as it did. This straight up snuck up on me, fly-kicked my feelings, and by the end I had written an 800 word comment that was too big for AO3 and I had to contact the author directly to send it to her. Awkward. I couldn’t help myself. The side to Katara we see here is so good, her empathy and love for her friends are one of the things I love seeing most in AtLA fanfic. I’m a sucker for Zuko having complete breakdowns and having to piece himself back together too. So sue me. I like it when they suffer a lil bit. The writing is absurdly good and I will be keeping an eye out for any new stories by goldilocks23!

 31 Minutes by @ifyouwereamelodymeg

It's quite astounding, really, how quickly she's learned to translate him. They've spent a grand total of zero time together outside of training, and he's hardly big on chat so she knows next to nothing about his life.

But she knows him, probably better than she knows anyone at the moment – with every tap of his fingers, every crook of his lips, every turn in his voice, he just...

He makes sense to her. It's weird.

I’m a sucker for fic writers playing with style to make the story pop and boyo does this fic deliver. This is one of the rare times that I’ve been dumbstruck at the end of a story— I just couldn’t accept the ending. Because I’m a sucker for pain, (and this story will bring The Pain) I loved it. The ease of Zuko and Katara’s growing relationship in this bowls you over, it’s absolutely beautiful and you find yourself nodding along emphatically when Zuko calls himself an idiot for waiting… “Life’s short, kids, live each moment as though it could be your last,” says this fic as it pulls my heart out and dropkicks it off a cliff.

 i count to five (and life passes by) by @markedmage

Five heartbeats.

I still haven’t forgiven Mage for this one. I think it’s the best thing she’s written to date! I mean, tragic and painful and heart-rending but holy shit is it powerful <3

 The Lake of the Dismal Swamp by @thewhiitelotus

Spook af. Spook (horror) is real hard to do well but thewhiitelotus is coming for your goosebumps and those shivers down your spine. She has a way of balancing beautiful, evocative imagery with action (in this and other stories of her) that just keeps you reading!

 Calloused by @rideboldlyride

Iroh hadn’t been able to watch. The pure horror of a man - a father- burning their child for a slight infraction... He couldn’t do anything to stop it, but he will stop his brother from destroying entirely the kind boy he knew Zuko could be.

This is a painfully underappreciated fic for how great the characterisation is. I know we in the zutara fandom tend to not read stories that aren’t Zuko/Katara centric as often but do yourself the favour of reading this (or listening to it: RideBoldlyRide has done us the gift of recording a podfic for this and it’s stupidly *good*). This story is Iroh confronting Ozai just after he burns Zuko’s face and it kicks.

 four days and three nights by @hinaoyamas (lettersfromnowhere)

Zuko discovers firsthand that nothing is more fleeting than happiness, or more enduring than memory.

Do you like reading stories with a distant, omniscient narrator? The kind that read like a myth from the ancient world? Welp, hit the hyperlink, friend, cause this one’s for you. Not only is the writing exquisite but the characterisation and painful inevitability of the plot is grade A.

 For the Fire Nation by tullyblue12

He falls in love with her for his country before he falls in love with her for himself. A Zuko/Katara AU that explores how love and duty aren’t always mutually exclusive.

There are about 40,000 exquisite lines in this story but here is just one of my favourites: “He falls in love with her for his country first. That’s what his people never understand.” This fic says a lot with so few words, which is something I really look up to! In 2,800 words, tullyblue12 does what some 100,000k fics cant: They make you feel.

 Guide Me Home by Rashaka

To sleep, perchance to dream. Katara and Zuko find a friendship they never expected in a place that seemed impossible.

This is a one shot I will forever wish for a continuation of. The setup is just… so juicy. There’s a real sorrowful innocence to this story that the unique short, dialogue only scenes really punch home. I know some people don’t like dialogue only fics but when done well like in this one, it leaves you with the impression of something deeper than a 1,185 word fic has any right to! 

 Other Favourites!

Hopeless by tullyblue12 — Kids grow up fast when a cruel world awaits them. In times of hopelessness, Katara and Zuko grow together. In times of separation, they hope to see each other again.

Speechless by goldilocks23 — Zuko has a medical condition. Or: Zuko speaks in haiku at inappropriate times.

Don’t Follow Me Down by eleventy7 — Katara is the dread queen of the underworld, ruler of the dead, destined to reign her cold kingdom alone. Until a sun god catches her eye. A Hades/Persephone retelling with incredible writing.

I Don't Speak Meow Language by @botherkupo (Boogum) — In which Zuko adopts a cat and Katara just wonders what spirits she pissed off to deserve this fate.

I have the privilege of being friends with some of these authors (they know who they are) and am in near daily awe and gratitude for the works of free fiction they provide us, the fandom. And not just any old stories: Guys... Really good ones!! Can I ask that if you go check out these fics, can you just drop a kudos or a comment their way? If you’re feeling shy just copy and paste this into the comments box anonymously: “WOW! Loved this! Thank you so much for writing it!”

I know it would mean the world to this talented bunch <3

[boldlyvoid]

Amoreena | chapter thirteen

Chapter Thirteen

main summary: Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.

Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.

Chapter Warnings: fluff like unbelievably fluffy!

word count: 6.1

here's the playlist for the fic, the last song in the playlist if looped will lead right into Amoreena at the beginning and it works pretty well timing-wise if you like to listen while you read !!

from the beginning <3

All their bags were packed by Friday morning, Y/N and Amoreena waking up extra early with excitement for the weekend ahead of them, and they didn’t even know what was going to happen yet.

Y/N made sure everything was packed and ready for a 3rd time on Saturday morning, right before they left on the trip; making sure they had sunscreen and aloe vera, all her medicine and ginger ale by the pack for her random bouts of morning sickness that lasted all, day, long... And their dresses and his suit hanging behind the driver's seat, beside Amoreena, they all piled into Y/N’s car and took off down the road on their adventure.

Amoreena was awake for the first half of the 9-hour trip, singing like crazy as they drove through Washington, Baltimore, Philadelphia and New York, it was so amazing she couldn’t stop cheering the whole time. It was more than she’s ever seen before, even though they lived so close to New York, she’s never been through it before.

Once they arrived in Rhode Island, Spencer pulled over at the closest gas station to make sure the girls were all prepared and ready for the big surprise he had for them. They filled the car, used the restroom and bought some lemonade before getting back into the car, he turned in the driver's seat to see Amoreena and Y/N better, looking at their wide eyes memorizing the calmness in their faces before he told them.

He didn’t want them to freak out too much, he was worried about Y/N’s blood pressure and how loud she might scream and any stress that a situation like this could put on her body. He’s seen how people react to Taylor Swift, he just didn’t know how they would.

“Now, I'm only telling you so you don't freak out," he repeated the same worry she had when she broke the news of the baby, "I didn’t have to rent a place on the water because my friend lives up here, so we’re going to stay in her guest house,” he explained it simply.

“Rossi's wife?” Y/N asked, confused about who it could be and if she knew this woman yet.

“No, actually I think you might know her, her name is Taylor?”

“No,” she shakes her head furiously, “no, nope, there's no way you did this, Spencer Walter Reid I am not kidding I’m going to pass away if I see her.” She's holding both her hands in fists as she tries to stay calm, closing her eyes quickly before letting out a deep sigh.

“Taylor who?” Amoreena yells, undoing her seatbelt and standing between their seats, she almost jumps into his lap as she leans over and grabs a fistful of his shirt, “Taylor WHO?”

“Go get in your seat and I’ll show you,” he teases, watching her follow orders and get back in the seat as quickly as possible, shouting at him to drive the second he hears the seatbelt click again.

Y/N is completely speechless for the next 20 minutes of the drive, eyes wide and a hand on her stomach as she stares out the front window. She’s like a statue, not able to hear anything Amoreena is saying but that doesn't stop her from going on and on with her stories.

“Mom!” She’s finally able to break her out of the haze, “pass me your phone!”

“Yeah,” she doesn’t even question it, handing her the phone back to the antsy 7-year-old so she could continue her internal panic.

They see her house on the hill as they approach, “holy shit,” Y/N whispers as Amoreena turns on the last great American dynasty, knowing exactly where they were going.

Taylor asked for his licence plate number and car model when they were emailing, letting her gate guy know to let Spencer right in so he could keep it a secret. But they knew the house, there was no point in not telling them. Y/N looked a little relieved that he gave her the time to freak out alone and not as soon as they crested the hill.

Her driveway felt never-ending as they got closer and closer, Amoreena was still in disbelief as she squealed in the back seat, hands flailing as she tried to calm the excitement inside her body with her favourite stim.

Then Taylor walked out into the front yard and Y/N was a mess. Crying as she waved her hand in front of her face, not wanting to be a mess in front of Taylor fucking Swift, “I told you nothing crazy! How did you do this?”

“Yes, but I said 'define crazy’ and you didn’t,” he reminds her with a cheeky smile.

She shoves him, “I didn’t think you could do this?!”

Once they’re parked the door automatically unlocked, and as much as spencer hated that non-safety feature, he's glad Amoreena can get out quickly before she's screaming bloody murder. Amoreena is out the door and in Taylor’s arms faster than they’ve ever seen her move, she should be a track star. It almost knocks Taylor to the ground as she takes her in, holding the sweet little girl against her chest with the biggest smile on her face. Amoreena snuggles right into her, with a hand on her cheek and her other arm wrapped behind her neck. She couldn't be any closer to her, it was like she was her favourite relative who she hasn't seen in a while.

Amoreena is talking her ear off already by the time Spencer’s helping Y/N out of the car and walking her to Taylor, she’s holding his hand like she’s going to pass out or something, “and this is my mom Y/N and my dad Spencer but somehow you know him already,” Amoreena introduces her.

“Hi, Y/N, it's a pleasure to meet you, Spencer's told me a lot about you.” Taylor’s sweet voice saying her name alone makes her stutter out a bunch of nonsense, not to mention the fact Spencer's been talking to Taylor fucking Swift about her.

Amoreena moves out of the way for Taylor to wrap her up in a hug, and Y/N cries harder than he’s ever seen on her shoulder, “thank you,” is all she can say, it’s frightening to Amoreena at first to see her mom cry like that but she knows her mom just loves Taylor like family.

What she doesn’t know is just how much Taylor saved her life. If she didn’t have someone to listen to, someone to take the pain and replace it with hope, she wouldn’t be here and by default neither would Amoreena. Spencer owed everything to Taylor swift at this point, she was a blessing in his life that he took for granted. Not realizing until that moment just how much she meant to him as well now.

“Sorry,” Y/N finally says as she pulls off her, “I’m pregnant, I can’t help it.”

Taylor’s hands fly right to her stomach, “holy crap, you never told me that she’s pregnant in your emails, oh my god!” She’s genuinely so happy for them, “how far along are you?”

“6 weeks on Sunday,” she smiles, feeling like herself again even though it’s incredibly strange to be telling Taylor before her parents even knew. “No one really knows, it’s all very new but when you know, you know… y’know?”

For a woman with an English language degree, she sure knew how to make a sentence, all of them laughing at the words she chose, but they understood.

“We should have used paper rings!” Amoreena yells, holding her hand over her eyes in disbelief as she shares her head with a sigh, she couldn’t believe she forgot that song existed.

It made Taylor laugh, scooping the little one up in her arms and starting the walk inside.

“Well come on in, I’ve got a big lunch spread ready for us and then we can go to the beach for the ceremony whenever you want this weekend, does that sound good?” Taylor is beyond excited to make new friends, much like Amoreena, they got along famously.

“Where are the cats? Do they live here or in LA or Nashville?” Amoreena changed the topic in the form of a yes and proving just how much she knew about Taylor.

“They’re here, Olivia and Benjamin will probably find us soon, Meredith isn’t very open to new friends now that she’s an old lady,” Taylor explained as she set Amoreena down in the entryway, bending down to be at her level and pointing off into the living room, “oh, see, there one is!”

Amoreena saw one of them laying on the floor under a sunny spot, running to it and petting it gently, “hi Benjamin, I loved you in the ME video,” she whispers as she pets him, making Taylor swoon.

“She’s amazing,” Taylor swooned, “I can’t wait to have one.”

“You should!” Y/N agreed, reaching to take Taylor's hand on impulse, and Taylor held it back with a smile, “oh that would be so wonderful, I can just imagine the beautiful stories you’ll create when you discover what it’s like to love someone how your mom loves you.”

Taylor’s smile was priceless, "that's the best way to think about it," she beamed at Y/N the way Spencer did, she had that effect on people. They followed her into the dining room, taking a seat near each other and digging into all the food Taylor made for them.

“Ah,” Amoreena said as she finally joined them, sitting on her knees on Taylors nice antique chairs. “Shark coochie,” she whispers the words to herself, not able to stop her mind from repeating it, but still not wanting Taylor to hear it in case it was inappropriate. She was incredibly well-mannered for someone who had a hard time reading social queues.

“It’s a hard word to say,” Taylor agreed, making her feel less awkward. Spencer may have told her about her autism in advance, wanting his little girl to be respected by everyone she met, for who she truly was, “my mom called it a coochie spread once, actually, she's going to be over tomorrow for father's day.”

"Yes! Oh, I love Andrea," Amoreena laughed at how cool this day was, smiling at Taylor the way she smiled at him that first morning at breakfast like she just found yet another person to love. “You’re so wonderful, Taylor.”

“Oh, thank you, you're pretty enchanting yourself,” she smiles, “I take it you’ve known about me for your whole life?”

“Yep,” she smiled, reaching for a chocolate-covered strawberry and taking a huge bite, covering her mouth before she continued, “I was born a month after Red came out, November thirteenth, it really is a lucky number now, mom says so at least.”

“It is!” Taylor agreed with a smile, “I have some markers, do you want to wear matching 13’s today?”

“Mom, can I colour on my hand?” She turns so fast Spencer thinks she’ll get whiplash.

“Yeah, go for it!” She agrees, spreading cream cheese on a croissant and layering tomatoes on top, definitely pregnant.

So Taylor gets a marker and both their left hands now have matching numbers. Amoreena asks to take a million photos, eventually just taking Y/N’s phone from her, permanently, to take photos of all her favourite things around the house.

She runs off with the cats at a certain point, giving Y/N a chance to thank Taylor without tiny ears listening in. “Can I get really emotional and tell you how much you mean to me or is that too weird for our first chat?”

“Not weird at all, knowing you’ve used my music to raise that beautiful child makes me love you just as much, I’d love to hear why you picked me, of all musicians, to show her how to love,” Taylor replies, as regal and kindly as humanly possible.

“My first fiancé, Stephen, he was actually like an angel and our first kiss was quite literally in the rain, but he passed away in 2010,” she explained it with a smile so Taylor knew it wasn’t a touchy subject anymore, “I bonded with Fearless in a way I can’t even describe to you, it’s my life, he was my superstar, and white horse, I mean come on, I can’t tell you how many times I cried to that after he died but it helped me not feel alone. I wouldn’t be who I am without Fearless, and then Speak Now was there for me when I needed a good cry, Last Kiss really broke me but it wasn’t until Lover came out that I realized I could find someone again, and it’s always just like you released things as I needed them like you were helping me through all the bad things,” she’s never even told Spencer all this, it was special to him that he got to give her this moment.

“When you re-released it with the vault songs, I met Spencer literally a month later. I cried my eyes out to you all over me, but That’s When makes me think of Spencer and now the whole album has a new memory in my heart that’s better. It's just like why you re-released it, to replace the bad things that happened that took all the happiness out of something you cared so much about." Y/N took a second to breathe, shaky as she got to the end of her rant that she seemed to have prepared in the 20 minutes before she had to talk to her.

"I love you, honestly. You’re my best friend and you didn’t even know me then, but you’ve held my hand through it all, so thank you,” she cried a little, holding her belly with one hand as she tried to hold the tears in.

Taylor was out of her chair and in Y/N’s arms within seconds, crying into her arms as she held her. She rubbed Y/N’s back as she cried too, “I’m so sorry that happened, but I’m glad I could be there.”

“Do you want to be this baby's godmother?” She asks on impulse without even asking Spencer if he’s okay with it, he was, it made him laugh.

“Eleonora Taylor Reid,” Spencer says from across the table, making them both turn to him with wide eyes.

“Yes,” Y/N agrees fast, “that's the name if it’s a girl, if it’s a boy he can be Taylor as well?”

“Holy shit,” Taylor smiled wide, “yes, I want to come to visit the farm and buy them baby gifts and throw you a baby shower! I inadvertently helped make them so it’s only fair.”

“Hopefully she gets your voice too, Y/N,” Spencer adds and Y/N shoots him a panicked glance, “it’s the Taylor legacy to be a good singer.”

“You can sing?” The question Y/N feared coming past Taylor's lovely vocal cords, almost on queue.

Y/N can't help but glare at spencer, he had too many tricks up his sleeve and she was at her limit.

“Yes,” Y/N finally answers, “I was going to go to theatre school, but I switched to become a Librarian, I’m not good with crowds or competition and that's basically what the industry depends on. I like the quiet, telling stories on paper is just as easy as singing it to a crowd.”

“That's fair,” Taylor agreed, “would you and Amoreena like to sing some song with me? I have my guitar or the piano? I’m not used to having new friends over without sharing at least 1 song with them. I’m sure you’ve seen my listening parties?” She was really trying to convince her to sing, Spencer knew why and what she had planned.

Amoreena came running in then, “I can play piano too, can we do the long live new year's day from the tour movie?” She rests her hands on Taylor's arm, looking up at her with the biggest puppy dog eyes.

“Of course, come on,” she says taking Amoreena’s hand and rushing into the piano room. “Here, we’ll record it too,” she offered, setting her phone up on the music stand to capture the moment forever.

They sat side by side on the bench, Amoreena showing her how she could play the opening perfectly and surprising Spencer. He knew they had a piano at home, he’s just never seen her play it before.

“She has perfect pitch,” Y/N bragged, “she can play a song after hearing it once.”

“Really?” Spencer had no idea, unbelievably proud of her as he listened to her play.

She’s quietly playing the intro to Long Live as Taylor watches, joining in with the harmony of New Year's Day, “this one reminds me of my mom and dad.”

“Does it?” Taylor coo’s, smiling at her softly as Y/N tries not to cry beside Spencer.

“They’re the knight and the princess of our kingdom,” she explained before the two of them started singing the words together, like they always have, only Taylor was beside her and not just on the TV.

“I said remember this moment, in the back of my mind, the time we stood with our shaking hands, the crowds in the stands went wild,” Amoreena’s tiny voice lead-in, fearlessly as she played away.

“We were the Kings and the Queens, and they read off our names, the night you danced like you knew our lives would never be the same... You held your head like a hero, on a history book page... It was the end of a decade, but the start of an age,” Spencer couldn’t help but cry as she sang with Taylor.

This was on the concert movie, he showed her after school, this song came on and she was silent, listening to the words as she stared at him and then back at the TV. Her mind was connecting little dots, making a story about her mom and dad being the king and the queen, it all made sense now.

“Long live the walls we crashed through, how the kingdom lights shined just for me and you, I was screaming long live, all the magic we made and bring on all the pretenders, I’m not afraid,

Long live all the mountains we moved, I had the time of my life, fighting dragons with you, I was screaming long live, that look on your face, and bring on all the pretenders, one day, we will be remembered,”

Their fingers moved in sync on the keys as they harmonized almost perfectly, she wasn’t kidding about Amoreena having perfect pitch. She knew all the words and sang them almost louder than Taylor.

“And hold on to spinning around, confetti, falls to the ground. May these memories break our fall…”

The piano changes, the cords softer as they move into a new song, smiling at her mom and dad like she knew something. She had no idea what happened the night of the fake wedding, just that they had a party without her.

“And hold on… To spinning around… Confetti… Falls to the ground…”

Spencer wraps his arms around Y/N then, resting his chin on her shoulder as they sway to the tune, she’s barely whispering the words beside him as she smiles as her baby.

“There's glitter on the floor after the party, girls carrying their shoes down in the lobby, candle wax and Polaroids on the hardwood floor, you and me from the night before, but… Don’t read the last page, but I stay when you're lost, and I'm scared and you're turning away. I want, your midnights, I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day,”

Y/N’s hands rest on top of Spencer’s, she squeezes them three times, right before the next lyric.

“You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi, I can tell that it's gonna be a long road. I’ll be there if you're the toast of the town, babe, or if you strike out and you're crawling home,

Don't read the last page, but I stay, when it’s hard or it’s wrong or we’re making mistakes. I want, your midnights, but I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day,”

“Hold on, to the memories, they will hold on to you,” the two of them chanting along with Taylor in beautiful harmony, Spencer felt like he was in heaven among the angels, but for real this time. “And I will hold on to you…”

The piano is so soft, it’s just Amoreena’s fingers hitting them as Taylor goes silent, letting her take the lead with a soft smile, “Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh, I, could recognize anywhere. Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh, I, could recognize anywhere.”

They stop for just a moment for Amoreena to smile up at Taylor, just like the break in the concert, “I really do love you,” she reminds them all before playing again.

“We love you, too, sweet girl,” Taylor replies for them using the same nickname for her because it was the truth. She was the sweetest girl, that Amoreena.

“There's glitter on the floor after the party, girls carrying their shoes down in the lobby, candle wax and Polaroids on the hardwood floor. You and me forevermore, don't read the last page, but I stay when it’s hard or it’s wrong or we’re making mistakes and I want, your midnights, but I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day,”

“Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you,” the girls all chant together, swaying back and forth to the rhythm before taking different parts in the song like they’ve planned it before.

“And Long live,” Taylor takes the one song, while Amoreena takes the other.

Please don't ever become a stranger…

The walls we crashed through..

Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere…

I had the time of my life

Please don't ever become a stranger…

With you…

Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere…"

Amoreena plays the rest, smiling wide at the best day of her life. Meaning every single word she’s saying. “And Long live, the walls we crashed through. I had the time of my life… With you…” Amoreena ends with a few extra notes, making Taylor smile as she held her in a side hug.

She turns back to the piano then, starting to play Amoreena by Elton John. “No way..” Y/N gasps, before getting ready to sing along with all the confidence in the world, alongside Taylor Swift of all people.

“It’s just that; Lately, I've been thinking, how much I miss my lady, Amoreena's in the hayfield, brightening the daybreak,” Taylor changes some of the words, much to Y/N surprise.

“Livin’ like a lusty flower, runnin’ through the grass for hours, rollin’ through the hay, oooh, like a puppy child! And when it rains, the rain falls down… washing out the cattle town… and she's far away somewhere… in her eiderdown… And she dreams of crystal streams, of days gone by when we would lean… Laughing, fit to burst, upon each other…”

Y/N turns to Spencer then, singing to him softly as she wraps her arms around him and sways her hips to the song, pressing against him like they were in the movie Dirty Dancing, something she’s always wanted to do, clearly, with the smile on her face as she sings.

“I can see you sittin’, eatin’, apples in the evenin’. Fruit juice, flowing slowly, slowly, slowly down the bronze of your body. Livin’, like a lusty flower, runnin’ through the grass for hours, rollin’ through the hay, oooh, like a puppy child.”

Amoreena’s voice was the loudest in the chorus, this was her song after all. She belted it out like it was made for her.

“And when it rains, the rain falls down! Washing out the cattle town! And she's far away somewhere… in her eiderdown! And she dreams of crystal streams, of days gone by! When we would lean, laughing, fit to burst upon each other…”

Spencer knew the words as well, who didn’t? It was Elton John's best song. He hugged Y/N, snuggling into the crook of her neck as they twirled in Taylor Swift's living room, swaying with her, forgetting they weren’t alone for a moment.

“Oh, if only I could nestle, in the cradle of your cabin. My arm's around your shoulder, oh… The window wide and open, while the swallow and the sycamore, whoa! Are playing in the valley. Oh, I miss you, Amoreena, like the king bee misses honey!”

“And when it rains, the rain falls down! Washing out the cattle town! and she's far away somewhere… in her eiderdown! And she dreams of crystal streams, of days gone by when we would lean! Laughing, fit to burst upon each other, oooh!”

Amoreena and Taylor playing the iconic piano solo together, Y/N can’t help but move in closer to watch over her little girls shoulders.

“Lately, I've been thinking… How much I miss my lady… Amoreena's in a cornfield, brightening the daybreak. Livin’, like a lusty flower! Runnin; through the grass for hours! Rollin’ through the hay, woah! Like a puppy, like a puppy, child…” Y/N’s voice loud enough to be on the recording Taylor was making as the song ended.

Taylor stopped it then, just as Y/N swore, “holy shit, that was the coolest thing that’s ever happened in my whole life.”

“Mom,” Amoreena looked at her like she broke the law or something, “you don’t swear in front of her…” she mumbled.

Taylor laughed, wrapping her up in another hug, “have you heard champagne problems? It’s okay for big kids to swear here,” she teased her.

They laughed like they were family like they’ve been there before and were always meant to return. Something just clicked with them, and without a doubt, they’d be returning. Taylor Swift of all people slipped right into their little life, filling the shoes of big sister, best friend and coolest aunt in the world all in one day.

It was the most perfect afternoon.

—

Just before the sunset, they all changed into their wedding attire. Meeting out on the beach for their small, extremely intimate wedding ceremony with miss Taylor Swift. Getting it out of the way so they could have the whole weekend for whatever Taylor had planned for them. She said she had a few surprises up her sleeve still.

They filled out all the paperwork required on Taylor's kitchen table beforehand, she had all the right documents from when she registered to ordain online. All they had to do was submit it at town hall and they’d be legally married.

But it didn’t matter to them, this was enough.

Taylor and Amoreena stood side by side at a homemade arch on the beachfront that Taylor owned, waiting patiently for Spencer and Y/N to walk down the fake aisle, hand in hand. They couldn’t stop smiling as they saw Amoreena at the end, a big smile on her face as she bounced with excitement.

They reached the end, turning to each other, Amoreena took Y/N’s bouquet, it was her duty as maid of honour and best man.

“Spencer and I have been emailing for 2 weeks about today, he’s been filling me in little by little about you both as he got to know you, I’ve really gotten to see his love for you in the form of letters,” Taylor described with a large smile on her face.

Y/N looks at him with an open mouth, shocked as she shakes her head in disbelief at him. “You’re kidding, is she who emailed you when we had lunch 2 weeks ago?”

Spencer nodded with another cheeky smile, “she emailed me as you told me not to plan anything too crazy.”

Y/N just laughed at the insanity, “sorry Taylor, please continue.”

“It’s okay,” she laughed along, “it’s actually kind of interesting how Amoreena picked long live and New Year’s Day to sing because from what I’ve learned about you both, the intermission poem from that tour really was written for you, somehow. Almost like by design or some violent, exquisite happenstance…”

Y/n’s eyed do that thing they always do when she’s remembering something she’s heard before, finding the exact filing cabinet in her mind and opening it. She finds the words.

“When she fell, she fell apart. Cracked her bones on the pavement she once decorated as a child with sidewalk chalk,” she starts the poem with a small nod, letting Taylor continue the monologue in the form of vows.

“When’s she crashed, her clothes disintegrated. And blew away with the winds that took all of her fair-weather friends, family and lovers. When she looked around her skin was spattered with ink. Forming the words of a thousand voices, echoes she heard even in her sleep: whatever you say, it is not right. Whatever you do, it is not enough. Your kindness is fake. Your pain is manipulative.”

Y/N hasn’t watched the concert recently, unlike Spencer. She didn’t realize how much it sounded like them. Spencer, however, spotted the coincidences the second he heard it that night with Amoreena. Telling Taylor, explaining in detail how Maeve and Stephen were their personal last kiss storylines, but they’ve found a lover in each other. Cheesy, but it was the best way he could describe it.

“When she lay there on the ground she dreamed of time machines and revenge. And a love that was really something. Not just the idea of something.”

She turned her attention to Spencer, replacing the pronouns to fit him for the next part, Y/N looked at him already knowing why, smiling as she made the connection in her mind.

“When he finally rose, he rose slowly. Avoiding old haunts and sidestepping shiny pennies. Wary of phone calls and promises, charmers, dandies and get-love-quick-schemes.

When he stood, he stood with a desolate knowingness, waded out into the dark wild oceans up to his neck. Bathed in his brokenness. Said a prayer of gratitude, for each chink in the armour he never knew he needed.

Standing broad-shouldered next to him, was a love that was really something. Not just the idea of something.

When they turned to go home, they heard echoes of new words: may your heart remain breakable but never by the same hand twice. And even louder: without your past, you could never have arrived so wondrously and brutally, by design or some violent, exquisite happenstance… here.”

“What she said,” Y/N says with a quick giggle, leaning in as she laughs, taking him down in a giggle fit with her.

Amoreena’s lightly tugging on Taylor’s dress then, “you have to say it, please you can’t not say it, I had this planned out before I even knew you’d beee here…” she whispers like Taylor has any clue what she’s talking about.

Y/N just starts to shake her head with a smile, “I think she means the speak now bridge,” she reminds her.

“Ahh,” she smiles, picking Amoreena up to be at eye level with them all, she sings. “I hear the preacher say speak now or forever hold, your, pee-E-eeace,” she sings it exactly like it is on the album, almost as if she’s been practicing to release it again…

“There’s the silence there’s my last chance, I stand up with shaking hands all eyes, on me,” Amoreena lightly signs right back. “Horrified looks from everyone in the room but I’m only looking at you!”

Spencer laughs then too, smiling at his little girl living out the fantasy of a lifetime, seeing her mom dressed like a princess and marrying the broken knight with rusty armour, while Taylor Swift of all people holds her. Nothing about the life they had together felt real, but he wouldn’t change it for the world.

“I think it’s only fair if I get a say in who marries my mom because I’ve known her the longest,” she adds, “and I’m not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on this white veil occasion, but you happen to be the best dad in the whole world, so I think it’s cool that you love my mom.”

Y/N lets out a choked sob, she clearly had no idea that Amoreena was planning to say all that, but of course, she was. She knew all about every single Disney princess wedding, every fairytale ending and happily ever after, Taylor has helped her learn about love and vows and true feelings that cannot be stopped.

She knew what to say and she meant every word.

Spencer reaches out to take Amoreena from Taylor, holding her in his arms instead as Y/N snuggled in close to them, both his girls in his arms.

“I think it’s only fair I give some vows to you as well, I’m committing my whole life to this family, you should know how much that means I love you, too, Amoreena.” She snuggles in closer to his neck as she holds him back, Y/N’s head resting on his other shoulder.

“Till the day I die, I am going to be here for you: with unconditional love, with the best stories and the best morning cuddles. I don’t care if you pull me out of bed at 5 in the morning to feed the goats, or the chickens or just because you think the sun looks pretty and want me to see it too. I love you Amoreena, you’ve completed my life."

"Do you remember that day you asked me to be your dad?” his voice is so soft as he bumps her cheek with his nose.

She wipes her tears as she pulls away from his shoulder, overly emotional at the events of the day and extremely tired from the excitement she let out earlier. She nods softly, “I meant it.”

“I know honey,” he can’t help but start to cry a little as well, dropping his manly facade and being real with her. She deserved to see exactly what she meant to him, “I watched you pouring glitter glue all over that table, making the biggest mess ever, but it made me think… I had a hole in my heart for so many years, there was a part of me missing for so, so, so long, and then I found a little Eden by beautiful little kingdom, and the fairest lady in all the land took me in, and she patched up my broken heart with glitter glue.”

Amoreena tried to smile the tears away, sniffling as she tried to nod, “that's how I felt when you told me I could pick you to be my dad.”

Y/N was a sobbing mess, having to crouch down to her knees as she let it all out, steadying herself by holding onto Spencer’s leg like a child would at that height, “is she okay?” Amoreena worried.

“Your mom loves us so much, and the baby does too, so it’s making her a bit more emotional than normal,” he explains, wishing he could scoop Y/N up and hold her as well.

She wipes the tears from her face as she calms herself down and stands back up with help from Taylor, “thank you,” she manages to whisper to her with a smile.

She’s also been crying, watching the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen. A family built on true love coming together, using her songs to form a bond that she’d never understand.

And she didn’t want to, some stories were best kept in families, to be sent down the line, generation after generation, to fall into the lap of someone like her one day and create a whole world with it.

“With the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband, wife and daughter, the royal Reid family,” Taylor’s voice is soft as she plays along with Amoreena’s fantasy land, hushed to match the moment as Spencer leaned in to kiss Y/N.

Amoreena doesn’t cry out in disgust this time, instead, resting her head on her dad's shoulder as she watched them peck each other's lips gently. Watching a fairytale happy ending unfold in front of her very eyes, blessed to be the result of this happy union.

...

A/N: my anon is on now if anyone wants to come talk about the fic with me!! i love to share little hc's and things with you over here (also this was the original planned ending I wasn't going to continue past here but I'm probably going to write this for the next 10 years its too fun not to)

tag list: @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria @spookyspence @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @samuel-de-champagne-problems @jswessie187

[separatist-apologist]

Alright I’ve half-lurked for long enough and the guilt is weighing me down so here I am, off anon. I am in complete awe of you. I don’t know what you sacrificed to be gifted with the otherworldly writing skills you have, but holy shit babe. You’re beyond incredible. You have a true, undeniable gift. The stories, messages, emotions, absolute whirlwind of feelings you pack into your stories??? Leave me speechless. And then the fact that you’re kind enough to share that gift with all of us peasants waiting outside your palace begging for scraps? This fandom doesn’t deserve you. To be completely honest, and I mean this in the most complimentary of ways, I stopped writing (I’m doing an elucien long fic rn) because I found your writing. It was so good that I literally just stopped and was like…elucien fans have everything they need right here lmao they don’t need me. BUT that’s all me and my mental illnesses so I mean that in the most complimentary way! I binge read your fics and was so overwhelmed by how good they are (and how fast you wrote them??? Wtfff???) that I literally got too scared to comment. I didn’t even know where to begin? So here I am confessing on a random Wednesday. I will be rereading all your fics (again) and commenting on every chapter cause they’re too good to not be appreciated. You’ve made me feel things when I was going through rough patches and couldn’t feel a thing, you’ve made me love characters I didn’t think twice about before (yup eris), you’ve made me fall in LOVE with your OC (ERIS X ARINA BABEYYY) and you’ve created the ONE modern acotar au I will never ever forget. I don’t like aus and even less modern aus but HONEY YOU OUTDID YOURSELF WITH HOLY GROUND. Also last of the real ones???? Don’t get me started. Anyways. I hope this message finds you well and lifts your spirits a little if they need lifting. Just know that you have an incredible gift and I hope you feel as talented as we all know you are. And in case you don’t, please let this be a reminder. You are so loved and powerful and appreciated and now I’m going to go reread all your fics so prepare to be spammed. Thank you for sharing your writing with us.💕💕💕💕

First of all, this was so nice I had no idea how to respond. Really, I'm glad you like my OC and my writing.

Secondly, and way more importantly, DO NOT STOP WRITING. I just read your first chapter and it's wonderful! Elain's pain was mine, her embarrassment so relatable, the rejection too real. You did such a lovely job evoking emotion from your reader. Thats a skill not everyone has. It would be a shame if you stopped. You're telling a story I never could, that NO ONE could ever tell because they lack your insight, your perspective, your creativity. It's a GOOD story but even if only one person read it, it would still be worth telling.

I've linked it here, I recommend it. Elucien is blessed with so many talented, funny writers. I certainly do not, and will never, have that market cornered (if I ever say I do, you should gather a crowd and set my house on fire Frankenstein style).

Kings, Queens, & Vagabonds READ ME RIGHT NOW STOP EVERYTHING

[signed-yours-truly-the-whale]

Thoughts/Observations on Joker, part 1

AKA I Spent 7 Hours on This, I Will Die if it Gets Less Than Three Notes

I could rave for hours about this movie’s cinematography. Literal hours.

Nobody talks enough about Arthur’s full-fledged dedication to his clown craft. Man is working 60+ hours a week and does not break a sweat. I also fucking love this clowny face he pulls here. The first shot we see of Arthur in full. Holy shit is it beautiful. God bless Joaquin Phoenix.

These two shots together are incredibly important to me. In a split-second we see Arthur’s disbelief that he cannot control the whirlwind of emotions inside of his own head, not even being able to produce a smile, and then his resignation because it’s just another day. Heartbreaking.

Awwww shiiiiit

Gotham City is such a dump but I’d be bullshitting myself if I said I didn’t love the grimy aesthetic of it. It’s technicolor trash.

Arthur loves his job so much. He genuinely enjoys being Carnival. That hurts a lot to think about in hindsight.

This man just got his ass handed to him and he is STILL SPRAYING THE FAKE FLOWER ON HIS VEST

YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT DEDICATION

This opening card is so imposing. Not only does it take up the entire screen to the point of running off the edges, but it’s shielding Arthur from view. Arthur is invisible in light of Joker in Arthur’s own movie.

I screenshotted this by accident but I felt a need to put it here because he’s just so adorable. Even right before an episode.

E y e s s s s s

E Y E S S S S S

I desperately want to know what got Arthur sent to Arkham the first time. A suicide attempt? A public breakdown? I really want fanfics of it.

There’s a really, really good fanfiction on AO3 by Arthur_Fleck about Arthur slowly recovering and meeting a girl called In the Major and Minor Arcana

I highly, highly recommend it

Okay. Joaquin’s immersion into his characters -- all of them -- is absolutely incredible. But Arthur is just ... off the charts, man. No two of his characters are the same and he embeds himself so deeply in their skin, but Joaquin buried himself so deeply into Arthur’s brain that it is so hard for me to see any of Joaquin at all. God, he’s incredible and this shot makes me emotional because this just is Arthur.

ARTHUR WOULD BE A GREAT DAD AND I DO NOT ACCEPT ARGUMENTS

It really speaks to how shitty Gotham is that this man is having a full-fledged screaming/laughing breakdown on the bus and nobody is batting an eye

I adore how the cinematography paints Arthur as so small to his own environment. He’s a speck of dust. A fleck.

Babie is wincing :((((

I have been trying to figure out the layout of this apartment for months and my inability to, even with a floor plan, is driving me insane

I just found out that the Budweiser beer jingle Here Comes the King is on the soundtrack and plays when Arthur comes home and that made me go feral

I  A M  M U R R A Y , K I N G  O F  A S S H O L E S

It is second nature for me to do this stupid pose every time I watch this scene

Arthur blending into the crowd here makes me ... so happy. He looks so happy.

This is Arthur’s best laugh of the movie, fuck you. I am incredulous that I was the only person laughing when I saw this in the theater opening night.

This is one of the few moments I really see Joaquin shine through Arthur. I don’t know why, but this lighting and his voice and his intensity gives me visceral flashbacks to watching a little boy Joaquin in Parenthood. God, I love this man.

It really is a testament to Penny’s (lack of) parenting that Arthur is day dreaming about receiving affection and validation from a parent figure when his own mother is literally right there

GOD DAMN THIS MAN IS GORGEOUS

But also big bruise :(

Yes, I shall trust you, man named Randall smiling down at me in low angle light

Why was Hoyt not informed that Arthur got his ass beat on the job? As Arthur’s employer he should’ve literally been the first person to know so he could make a note of it. Either he wasn’t told or he gave so little of a fuck that his consciousness astral projected to another plane of existence while he shoved the white powder down his throat and forgot Arthur existed at all.

Literally fuck Hoyt. I hate him even more that his office is the coolest shit in the world

ARTHUR KNOWS THE CUSTOMER SERVICE SMILE

Joaquin dislocated his knee in this scene, the poor boy

I could write a full damn essay about why the misleading advertising of Sophie as a prominent character was the greatest twist of the whole movie. Literally I am still speechless how the movie did that.

I am not kidding when I say my sister has this same color scheme in the bathroom of our house and realizing that made me werewolf

Also Arthur being the son Penny doesn’t deserve warms and breaks my heart

The complete lack of reaction to Penny’s “Don’t you have to be funny to be a comedian” makes me laugh and cry internally

This shot? Gorgeous. His face? Deadly. That jawline? Cutting diamonds. Hotel? Trivago.

I really, really want a Joker 2, but at the same time I do not want a Joker 2 because Joaquin Phoenix has a baby who needs him now and he cannot be pulling shit like losing 52 lbs for a role

Also I REALLY need to discuss how much this brass ballet reminds me so heavily of Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. Holy fuck, I got actually chills in the theater

Like holy fuck

And then this shot reminds me so heavily of the opening of Fedddy vs Jason with Freddy Krueger laughing over his newspaper collage of missing children. Holy fuck I love this cinematography.

Guys. G - Guys, his name tag says Dr. Carnival, can you hear me  s o b b i n g

This part is so Chaplinesque, the way he slides the gun into his coat again

These children look so afraid of him for dropping the gun and wowie, does that really hurt

Was this asshole supposed to be modeled after Eric Trump? Because I get really douchebaggy Eric Trump vibes (minus the jacked teeth) from this ringleader

I don’t have much to say here except I am in love with the way Artie’s hair sticks straight up in bottle curls when the clown wig slides off

Also if you decide it’s a good idea to mess with a man dressed as a clown laughing maniacally on the subway of one of the most dangerous cities in the world, you are asking him to shoot you and I will not feel sorry for you

I will never not be in love with this image. I fell in love with it in the teaser trailer and almost went feral in the middle of the mall when I saw this was the poster they used to advertise the movie with. My friend described this movie as “chaos, beautified,” and nothing sums it up as well as this picture.

JOAQUIN AND TODD MADE THIS ENTIRE SEQUENCE UP AND I AM IN LOVE

Hello, handsome

[lofitojii]

ONE SHOT: A Simple Crush

♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡

Summary: You’re a costume designer for Pro Heroes, pretty well known in the industry. You take on a new Pro Hero as a client, doing your best to make sure all of your costumes are up to hero level. You start to think that you’re doing something wrong with your designs when Red Riot, the new Pro Hero, keeps coming back with a damaged costume only to find out, it was his excuse to see you. 

♡ Word Count: 2.8k

♡ Content: Fluff

♡ Kirishima x Female Reader

A/N: this was so much fun to write. It’s a little different than some of my other work, being similar to the Hawks one shot. Tbh, if I were in the MHA world, I would be best friends with Kirishima and Kaminari just based on personality. I hope you enjoy! :)

KIRISHIMA POV: The cool thing about being a Pro Hero is well, okay there’s a lot of cool things. Like the whole saving people, fighting bad guys, the media recognition thing. To be honest, I think all of it’s cool, but let me tell you how excited I am to have my hero costume designed by none other than Y/N. Ah man, she’s so badass at what she does and makes some seriously insane costumes. But that’s not the main reason why I asked for her to do it. I mean yes it’s going to be awesome to have a high tech costume, but I really did it to get to know her. 

I saw her on TV one time, she did an interview with Hawks about his costume design and I couldn’t tell you what the interview was about because I was too busy just staring at her. That sounds super creepish but I promise I’m not trying to be creepy. You get it, right? Like you see someone on TV or something and you fall in love like, almost immediately? Yeah, that’s how I would explain what happened. I have a crush and thank god I’m a Pro Hero now so I have a reason to talk to her. 

I stood outside the office building that was towering over the city. It was huge, her floor being on the 18th. I was fidgety in the elevator, trying to think of what I was going to say to her. God, I’m so nervous. Watch, knowing me, I’m going to say something stupid and she’s gonna think I’m an idiot. 

“Hi, how can I help you?” I walked up to the front desk, letting the clerk know I was here for Y/N who was running behind due to a meeting. That’s fine, I’ve got all the time in the word to wait for her. This just gives me time to think of what I want to say. 

“Hey there beautiful!” No. Too forward. 

“Why hello there. Come here often?” What the fuck? She works here. 

“Hi.” Oh my god, I’m going to make a complete fool of myself!! 

While I waited, I decided to flip through the meaningless magazines that were placed on a side table. I’m too nervous to focus on anything but if I just sit here, people are going to think I’m a weirdo for fidgeting so much.

The elevator made its dinging noise, signaling that someone was about to walk out. My heart is pacing so fast, it feels like it’s going to burst through my chest. When you walked out, it felt as if time froze, my vision blurring out the surrounding area, leaving you clear as day in my eyes. “God, you’re so beautiful.” 

“Haha, thank you sir,” you giggled. GIGGLED! My heart is literally about to jump out of my throat. “You must be Kirishima, it’s nice to meet you! I’m Y/N. If you would follow me this way, we can talk in my office.” I was actually speechless, at a loss for words as I stood there in front of you. I feel so dumb, say something you idiot!!!

“I’m sorry, about that out there,” I nervously scratched the back of my head. My cheeks felt so warm, not to mention I can feel myself sweating. Holy shit, this is weird, I’ve never felt like this before. “I’m just a big fan of yours.” 

“Don’t think too much about it,” you waved your hand, a smile still spread across your face. “You’re too kind, really. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t blush a little bit.” I made YOU blush? This day just keeps getting better. “Now, Kirishima, you didn’t fill out our form and the one from UA is rather old. What were you thinking, design wise?” 

“To be honest, I chose you because I feel like you’d know better than I would. I really liked the one I got from UA, that’s why I just attached it to your form.” I am so nervous, my hands are so clammy and I feel rather embarrassed I didn’t fill out your form, but honestly I’m just trying to draw out the time I spend here. 

“Not a problem. I already have your measurements,” you said, tapping your temple, referring to your eyes, I’m assuming. “My quirk let’s me take measurements of every body part. I see the numbers as soon as I make eye contact with you.” Wait, did you just say EVERY body part? You began to laugh, noticing my change in mood after you explained your quirk to me. “Don’t worry. I don’t measure down there.” 

“What? I mean, no! That’s not- You can if you- I mean-” Oh my god, I sound like a babbling idiot. I’m doing a really good job at keeping my crush a secret, aren’t I? You were still laughing, your laugh so infectious. You really have such a beautiful laugh, I want to hear it all the time. 

“Oh Kirishima, I’m excited to work with you. I’ll give you a call once it’s ready for you.” And like that, our meeting was done. I made a complete fool of myself but you said you were excited to work with me, and that was enough for me to leave feeling confident. 

You called me a couple days later, giving me the OK to come back in to try on the new costume you had designed for me. I showed up more excited about the fact I get to see you, and yeah, the costume is cool too, I guess.

You came up with such an awesome idea, the material being durable, room for the growth of my quirk. It was everything I expected and more, but honestly that doesn’t really surprise me. You’re quite amazing at your job. With this being said, with my costume being done, times I get to see you are very limited, so I have to take matters into my own hands on this one. 

“Hey Y/n,” I said, walking into your office. You look so cute today with your black business suit and that slicked back pony. You look so professional and business like. I wonder what a normal day is for you. I bet everyone thinks highly of you, I mean how could they not?

“Hey Kirishima! How can I help you?” You looked up at me with those beautiful, glossy eyes of yours. I could barely make out the crosshairs in your left eye but the slight discoloration made it a little easier. 

“Bad news,” I scratched the back of my head, placing the ripped costume on your desk. You jumped up, holding the torn fabric in between your fingers. You furrowed your eyebrows together, giving me a small glare that both excited and scared me. 

“What did you do?” 

“Ripped it?” 

“Kirishima…” 

“What!? You’re literally holding it in your hands. I don’t know how else to put it when the evidence is right there.” You let out a deep sigh, shaking your head. 

“Alright well I guess we’ll give you the second design. This one was so good though, how did it rip?” ‘Cause I ripped it in battle on purpose so I had a reason to come and see you. Wasn’t about to say that out loud, but that’s my truth, Y/n. 

You handed me the second design, warning me to be careful with this one but to be honest, I don’t care how much money I spend on these damn things. This time, I’ll wait a little longer to come back. I waited a whole two weeks instead of one so you wouldn’t pick up on my little plan here. 

“Don’t tell me…” You crossed your arms, this time you were in more of a laid back outfit. Leggings and a hoodie and holy shit, do you look incredible. Not to mention your ass- “Kirishima, what on earth do you keep doing that you keep ripping your outfits?” 

“The guys I’ve been going up against have all happened to have sharp like quirks?” 

“Even so, I designed it so it was a lot harder to rip. I specifically designed this one so it would withstand your ultimate move so it doesn’t make sense…” 

“I don’t know, I just fight ya know?” You were closer today, but you still couldn’t figure it out, even though you looked like you were deep in thought for most of our meeting. I promise you Y/N, I’ll tell you when the time is right. I just need excuses to come and see you until I have enough courage to ask you out. 

“Okay well are you able to stay a little longer today? Maybe do a few test runs of these other designs?” I nodded in agreement, following you to the testing center. I would’ve stayed longer to help you with anything, even taking the garbage out. You seemed frustrated but in the grand scheme of things, I’m doing all of this until I feel like I’m ready to ask you out. I’m not really good with talking to girls, let alone asking them out. I’m just nervous, I really don’t want to screw this up with you because I’ve truly never felt like this before. You make me feel different, every time I’m around you, I get mad butterflies. That’s not normal for me. 

“Alright Kirishima, go ahead and use your quirk as much as you can. I don’t want you to exhaust yourself.” I did what you said, the costume holding up to my power. I even pulled out my ultimate, the costume returning to my size when time ran out. You are truly incredible at what you do. “Good, now we’re gonna send out some testing bots. Don’t worry about breaking them, that’s what they’re for. The lasers do hurt though, so please be careful.” 

“No need to worry about me,” I said, crashing my fists together. You let the robots out, immediately shooting out lasers as they had me in their vision. You were right, the lasers do hurt, but they barely made a mark on the new costume. Damn it Y/N, you’re just too good aren’t you. 

The tests ran for a couple hours, and during that time I tried my best to warm up to you, or I guess have you warm up to me. I did everything I could to make you laugh, to really make you notice me other than just another hero here to get their costume made. I love your laugh, Y/N. I want to hear it all the time. Today was so special in my eyes, I think we made really good progress, but next time I don’t think I can come back due to a ripped costume. This one was perfect, you really went all out. It had to be more of a pride thing, but then again I’m just assuming. 

The next time I went back, I asked for you to add a belt for small weapons like a net or something to help restrain villains. I didn’t want to upset you by damaging my costume again, I think it was actually hurting you inside to see the costume destroyed like that. I get it Y/N, you take a lot of pride in your work. The time is coming close though, I really think we’re getting to a point where it won’t be awkward if I asked you out. 

“I didn’t mean for this to take this long,” you apologized as we waited for the belt to be made. I didn’t do anything this time, it was the machine’s own issues that prolonged my visit, which I’m not complaining about. “If you wanted, you can leave and come back tomorrow to get it.” 

“No it’s okay,” I assured you. “I don’t mind waiting. Plus it’s getting late, I don’t want you walking out there by yourself.” You were shocked by my offer, my comment making you… Blush? No way, did I just make you blush? Without having to call you pretty? Oh my god. 

“Thank you.” You were shy. I caused you to get all shy! I know this sounds so lame but this means that I’m on the right track! Or at least, that’s what the internet told me. 

It took about an hour for the belt to be completed, but within that time, we talked. We actually had a conversation. I told you about my UA days, talked about my family and my friends. The whole time, you seemed so invested, asking questions, referring to earlier topics letting me know you were actually listening. And when you told me about your life, I was in awe. You were incredible, every memory you mentioned being more exciting and interesting than the last. You told me about how you haven’t dated anyone in years because you were so focused on your career. You had made it though and I knew you were upset about not having someone to love. The way you spoke, so poetic and honest. You didn’t have to tell me you were upset, it lingered in your emotion, even though you ended your statement with a smile. 

“I haven’t dated anyone either,” I admitted, adding on to your subject. “To be honest, I’m not very good with talking to girls.” 

“That’s not true. I mean I’ve had a wonderful time talking to you.” 

“Me too, actually.” My palms were sweaty, clammy to the touch. My face was heating up, I could tell you noticed, your own cheeks becoming rosey. This was it, this was my chance. “Hey Y/N, can I tell you something?” 

“Of- Of course,” you stuttered. I let out a deep exhale, squeezing my thighs as I tried to form what I wanted to say. I could tell you were just as nervous. Stop that, I’m going to choke on my own spit if you keep staring at me with those big doe eyes of yours. 

“The last two time I ripped my costume? Yeah that was on purpose.” You just laughed, shaking your head in response. 

“I kinda figured,” you replied. “I didn’t want to assume anything so I just didn’t bother questioning it.” 

“Yeah well, I did it cause I needed some kind of excuse to come and see you.” I couldn’t make eye contact. I was both nervous and embarrassed and I really didn’t want to upset you, please understand.

“Kirishima,” you took my hand in yours, rubbing your dainty fingers across my bruised knuckles. “You could’ve just asked me out. I was excited every time you came back and not to mention our first interaction was you calling me beautiful.” 

“You remember that?” 

“And why wouldn’t I?” It went silent, I couldn’t pull my hand away. You were so shy, and to be honest I was nervous as hell. But I did what any courageous hero would, I leaned over and kissed you. In that moment, I kind of blacked out, nerves really taking over my entire body. I was surprised by your actions though as you leaned back into the kiss, your hand that was once holding mine found its way up to my cheek. You were so gentle, your hand and lips so soft. I couldn’t believe what was happening, it all felt so surreal. But here you were, here I was, kissing you, you kissing me back. 

You pulled away, your cheeks completely flushed. “I’m sorry,” you apologized, turning away from me. 

“Hey,” I whispered, turning your head back so I could reassure you. “I kissed you first because I wanted to.” You didn’t answer, you were too flustered, holding back whatever it is you wanted to say to me. So I took a shot in the dark, if you could even say it was in the dark with how you reacted to my kiss. “Y/N, can I take you out?” 

“Rip another one of my costumes and I’ll beat your ass,” you joked, pointing your finger in my face. “But yes, I will.” 

God, you’re so beautiful.

[upamongthestarss]

Perfect Timing//Bill Denbrough x fem reader

Please be kind! This is only my second time publishing on tumblr, so I’m not really sure what I’m doing, but here we are!

Warnings: smut, brief mention of fem oral receiving, swearing, mild angst, underage drinking

Spring break came way too slowly, especially for Y/n. Freshman year of college is said to be one of the best years of your life, but it’s definitely the worst. Her high school was entirely too easy for her, probably because her teachers were just idiots. Then college hit, and the workload was unbearable. Not to mention, she grew homesick for her parents and her best friends and even a tiny bit for Bill. 

Oh, how she hated Bill back home. 

Well, okay, she didn’t hate him, it was more of just a mutual tension that sometimes led to the Losers separating them at all costs. 

They went on a few dates freshman year, and even kissed once, but it all ended when popular Autumn asked Bill to “help her with English” at lunch one day. He completely forgot to tell Y/n, but didn’t think much of the whole affair anyway. When Y/n walked out of the lunch line, she smiled at her newly official boyfriend. He was hunched over a piece of paper, diligently writing with ginger hair falling into his eyes. When Autumn saw her coming over, she tapped Bill on the shoulder, and kissed him full on the mouth when he turned to her.

Y/n’s hands went slack, causing her tray to clatter to the ground. Tomato soup splattered all over her new white Keds. She obviously looked down to see the damage, and missed Bill pushing Autumn off of him. He went over to check on her and help her clean up, but she stormed off to the bathrooms. 

From then on out, there’s been so much tension between them. Even though Bill explained what happened countless times, she’s absolutely refused to listen. She’s had trust issues after her biological father cheated on her mother when she was little, and this, well, this basically made them inflate like the economy. She wasn’t on speaking terms with him until the end of the school year, and even then their friendship was rocky.

But there was also a sexual tension. Bill and Y/n still had blatantly obvious feelings for each other, whether they wanted to admit or not. In fact, they even went to senior prom together, but it ended in disaster. There was a dramatic exit from Y/n when he mentioned how he was on good terms with Autumn now, and she was really sorry for what happened. 

“Why the hell would you bring that up now?” Y/n rose from her seat.

“B-b-because she t-told me she w-wanted us to-”

“Can’t we just completely forget what happened back then? It was so long ago.”

Bill flushed. “Well, it r-r-really seems l-like you’ve n-n-never forgotten ab-about it these past th-three years.”

She threw her napkin on the table and left after saying, “You’re a dick.”

That night she vented to Eddie and ultimately admitted to having feelings for him, but he knew that all along anyway.

That night was the last time they talked until it was time for Bill to leave for NYU.

“Good luck,” she told him, bouncing on the balls of her feet nervously. 

“Th-thank you, Y/n, y-you too!” he was so excited that day that he even pulled her into a hug, much to her surprise (and delight). 

And now, here she is, on the plane to Palm Springs. It’s a long flight from Marywood, so Y/n uses her time to finish her homework. She’s majorly jetlagged by the time she lands at Palm Springs International. Luckily, the cab ride isn’t ridiculously long. When she gets to Richie’s beach house, he’s on the porch with his feet up and a daiquiri in hand.

“Y/N!!!!” he shouts, putting his drink to the side and running down the stairs.

“RICHIE!!!!” she yells back, dropping her bags to run and hug him. 

“Oh, it’s been so long!”

“I know!! And holy shit, your house is gorgeous!”

“I’m telling you, Y/n, I lucked out so much by scoring that audition. Can you believe it? Rich Records Tozier, the nation’s youngest beloved DJ.”

“Hardly,” she chuckles. “So how is the life of fame treating you?”

“Oh, brilliant. Come on in, I’ll give you a tour,” he scoops up her bag and leads her to the door. It’s an incredible house, with a beautiful kitchen and even a movie theater. 

“And here’s your room,” he gestures to the first door upstairs. 

“May I?” she asks, hand on the doorknob. 

“Be my guest.”

She swings it open to a redheaded girl on one of the two beds. She looks up from her magazine, smirking. “Hey, roomie!”

“Bev!” Y/n shrieks as her best friend runs to her and practically knocks her over. 

“When did you get here?!” 

“About an hour ago. Stan’s here too, but he’s taking a nap.”

“Well, we’ll have to fix that, won’t we?” Y/n grins mischievously. 

“Everyone else is supposed to get here tomorrow morning, except for Mike. He’s coming tonight.”

“Oh, thank God. No Bill for a half day more.”

“Oh, Y/n, don’t be so close-minded,” Bev giggles and they sit down on the same bed, bursting with so much to catch up on. Richie doesn’t know if he should sit down with them or just go back to his daiquiri, but the doorbell rings.

“Saved by the bell,” he says, getting the side eye in response. 

The girls talk for hours until they decide to say hello to Mike. Y/n stops at the bathroom first, and it takes her a while to find the kitchen after that. She has to follow the voices and Richie’s booming laugh.

“Sorry, I got lost,” she says, turning in the kitchen. “Hi, Mi-”

The third person talking to Richie and Beverly is not Mike.

It’s Bill. And she looks like a total bum in her old sundress and messy ponytail. She isn’t wearing a drop of makeup, either.

“Y/n.”

“Bill. Good to see you,” she holds out her hand professionally. He shakes it.

Is it good to see him? Looking at his cerulean eyes certainly sends butterflies through her stomach and through… other parts of her body.

“Y-you too.”

That immaculate stutter. She sits down at a barstool and crosses her legs together tightly. Richie and Beverly are quick to notice it, but restrain from commenting.

“I thought you were coming in tomorrow morning?” 

She doesn’t sound rude or accusatory, just curious.

“M-my flight got c-c-cancelled.”

“Okay, gotcha.” 

She drums her fingertips on the counter restlessly, not really knowing what else to say.

Luckily, Richie has a plan in case things get awkward between these two- and he’s already having to use it.

“Anyone want a drink?”

************************

“Nursing school is so insane. In anatomy, our teacher dissected a literal human body, and we had to examine it.”

“Eddie, please. We’re eating,” Y/n coughs. 

“It was disgusting, but it was also fascinating,” he defends himself.

“Whatever floats your boat,” Ben shrugs. 

“Y/n, tell us more about Marywood,” Eddie says, but she’s way too busy watching Bill talk to Richie’s cute next door neighbor while holding her little sister.

“You’re so good with her!” she simpers, tossing her shiny brown hair.

“Y/n? Earth to Y/n?”

“What?” 

“How’s Marywood?” 

“Oh, it’s… fine.”

“Just fine? Did you pick a major yet?”

She shakes her head.

“What about that guy? Are you still with him?”

“David? No, we were together for a while, but I guess the spark just kinda died. I mean, he initiated the breakup, but it was all mutual.”

Eddie squirts a dollop of sunscreen the size of a clementine in his hand. “That sucks. I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Don’t be,” Y/n shrugs, averting her gaze back to Bill. She’s very glad that she's wearing sunglasses, to hide her stares.

The cute girl was right, he is good with that little girl. Her heart would be melted, but Bill keeps flirting with the older sister. It’s disgusting.

And then, that girl has the audacity to drop the rattle she shook in the baby’s face. Y/n is close enough to hear the conversation, or at least read lips.

“Oh, l-l-l-let m-me get that.”

“Don’t worry, I got it,” she smiles, bending over so stealthily so that her breasts are all but out of that bikini.

“Ugh,” Y/n rolls her eyes.

“What’s up?” Ben asks.

“Nothing. I’m just going to go to the bathroom,” she stands up and walks almost catatonically to the door.

Instead of going to the bathroom, she finds a glass and slams it on the table. 

“D-damn, Y/n. That’s n-n-not a napkin, you kn-know.”

She jumps at Bill’s voice. He obviously followed her in, and she’s not too thrilled about it.

“Funny,” she replies, searching the cabinets. “Do you want anything?”

“I-I was ac-actually getting d-drinks.”

“Oh, for you and your new girlfriend? Hey, let me know when the wedding is. That is, if I even get on the guest list.”

“What’s your p-p-problem?”

“I don’t have a problem.”

Y/n finds a bottle of straight vodka and pours it right in the glass.

“Hey, its eh-eh-eleven AM,” Bill warns her, reaching for the glass. Unfortunately, their hands grab for it at the same time and it goes crashing to the ground. 

“Great, thanks,” she says.

“I didn’t w-want you to be w-w-wasted all d-day.”

“Listen, Bill,” she takes a deep breath. “I really appreciate your concern. I do. But it’s my life, and if I want to get wasted this early, then no one should stop me.” 

He doesn’t answer. They both grab rags and start to clean up around their feet.

“Th-this kind of r-r-reminds me of a certain sit-situation involving t-tomato soup,” Bill risks saying.

It was a terrible idea.

“Are you kidding me? I thought we moved on from that!”

“Yeah, so w-w-we can j-joke about it now!”

She’s silent for a minute, a blend of wrath and sadness.

“Just,” Y/n says, “Just go back out with your girlfriend.”

“I-I-I h-hardly know- o-okay, what the hell is y-y-your problem? We’re n-not together an-anymore!!! You sh-sh-shouldn’t c-care about my l-l-love life.”

“You don’t get it, do you?” she stands up, vodka dripping from the rag to her toes. “I don’t care that I shouldn’t care. I do care! I’ve always cared!” 

Bill is speechless, and she honestly doesn’t blame him. Y/n assumes he doesn’t feel the same about her. After all, they haven’t dated since freshman year. Sighing, she puts the rag in the sink and walks back outside.

She’s opening up her book and lying on her stomach to get a tan when Y/n hears an obnoxious “Excuse me?”

She looks up to the girl, who could literally be a bikini model.She looks at Y/n like she’s a piece of dirt, and Y/n just wants to smack her. She could never hurt anyone, though.

“Um, do you know when Bill will be back with the drinks?”

“Not a clue.”

******

Bill absolutely could not stop thinking of Y/n all day. He never really can, ever, but his thoughts have been out of control all damn day. They range from wild fantasies to regrets from way back when to just simply: She still likes me, she still likes me, she still likes me!!!!

He wants more than anything to talk to her and confess he’s been in love with her since high school, maybe even before that. But some small voice in Bill’s head tells him that even if she does have feelings, she won’t want to act on them. After all, he’s been nothing but an asshole to her.

Then again, so has she.

It’s really ironic that they’re so abrasive towards each other. Y/n is so kind and friendly to everyone she meets; that’s why Bill fell for her. And everyone tells him that he’s nothing but a sweetheart. And he’s always treated his every girlfriend like a princess. 

But it’s Y/n he wants as a girlfriend, and it always has been. 

Y/n comes running down the stairs, using the bansiters to prop herself up and skip the last couple steps. She’s been strangely lighthearted after she made that confession to Bill. It had been a weight on shoulders for the longest time, after all. And now that it’s out of the bag, she feels as if she can finally move on.

Holy shit, she’s so cute, Bill says to himself. She has this youthful energy, but the looks of a gorgeous young woman. Not to mention her outfit- a pastel yellow halter top, short jean shorts, and a sky blue scrunchie- looks magnificent.

“Okay, I’m ready to go!” she grins widely. “Sorry for the holdup!”

“You’re good,” Richie replies. “We were just figuring out transportation, considering I can only take five of us in my car.”

“I don’t mind taking the trunk,” Y/n shrugs. “Anyone else?” 

“I will,” Beverly volunteers. 

“Okay, great, and five of you can squish in the backseat. Mike claimed shotgun earlier.”

Everyone else groans while he flashes a smile and gives them finger guns.

“So charming,” Bev laughs and grabs Y/n’s hand. They run out to the car and squish in the trunk.

“Bev, I have to tell you something,” Y/n whispers.

“What?”

“I’m still not over Bill.”

“Thank you, Y/n,” she responds sarcastically.

“How did you know that? I only told Eddie!”

“It was just a little obvious,” she laughs. “And the good news is that we all think he feels the same way!”

“I don’t think he does, Bev,” Y/n shakes her head.

“What makes you say that?”

“Well, I told him today-”

“You what?”

“Shush!” she scolds as the boys get in the car. Luckily they’re all talking and can’t hear the girls if they whisper. “It just sort of... slipped out. But he didn’t even say anything. He just kind of… froze? It was so awkward.”

“You know he’s a little awkward around girls that he likes.”

“Is he, though?”

“Sure he is!”

“I don’t know, Bev. He stood there for a full thirty seconds without saying anything, and he just let me leave,” Y/n explains. “I think if he really liked me, he would have told me by now.”

Beverly gets quiet. “I’m so sorry, Y/n.”

“Hey, it’s okay! The timing was never right, and that- that happens. And it’s better I know now so I’m not hung up on him for the rest of my life.”

The rest of the drive is mostly just Beverly telling Y/n that there’s someone out there for her, and to keep her eyes open at the restaurant. 

It’s a bright restaurant, very tropical and very flamboyant. A lush plant, obviously made of silicon, is the centerpiece of every table. 

Good, it can hide me from Bill and spare my embarrassment, Y/n thinks as she sits opposite him. Unfortunately, Ben asks the hostess to take it away so he can see everyone. Y/n is mortified. Being directly across from her, he can watch and judge the girl the entire dinner.

She tries her hardest the whole meal not to pay Bill any mind, but it gets difficult when he starts getting tipsy. And drunk Bill can be wild. Singing and dancing on the tables wild. Luckily he isn’t at that point yet.

She doesn’t even know how he was able to buy drinks here; he’s only nineteen. The waitress must have a crush on him or something. Maybe she and Richie’s neighbor could start a Bill fanclub.

Y/n has a feeling the waitress would ask for her ID, though, so she sticks to soda. And three Shirley Temples is never good on anyone’s bladder.

“I’m going to the bathroom,” she announces. “Anyone else?”

Everyone shakes their heads. Everyone except…

“Me! M-m-me!” Bill waves his hand around like a hyper child.

“Great, I’m a babysitter now,” Y/n murmurs.

She starts walking to the bathroom, Bill hot on her heels. Surprisingly enough, when she finishes peeing, he’s actually waiting for her. 

“F-f-finally. G-g-girls take so long in the buh-buh-bathroom.”

She ignores him.

“Y/nnnnn,” he slurs. “I’ve been m-m-meaning to t-t-tell you, your a-a-ass looks fantastic in th-those shorts.”

“Because that’s not a rude thing to say at all,” she replies, feeling her face burn up.

“I’m n-n-not trying to be r-rudeeee,” Bill grabs her waist and pulls her in. Y/n can smell all the alcohol on his breath, and it’s disgusting. He kisses her full on the mouth.

She shoves him off, embarrassed by his behavior. “You’re drunk.”

“If b-b-being drunk makes me w-w-want to m-make out with you, I-I-I never want t-to be so-sober.”

That hits Y/n hard. Bill Denbrough wants her. But only when he’s drunk. 

He doesn’t love her in his right mind. This is all she has, and she can’t even fathom just taking advantage of him when he’s drunk. Using someone would hurt her in such an inexplicable way, and not to mention it would tear whatever small bond she had with Bill into shreds.

She plops back down in her seat, barely touching the rest of her food or speaking for the rest of the night.

When she gets to her shared room with Bev, Y/n takes a shower. She’s always loved showers because they’re a place where you can cry without risk of anyone hearing over the water running.

And that’s exactly what Y/n does. She lets the tears stream down her face, washed away by the showerhead’s water.

*******

Bill knows he got plastered last night, so it’s no surprise when he wakes up with a pounding headache. But he isn’t sure why Y/n is so quiet, especially around him. Usually she has a remark or at least a glare for him, but she seems almost meek today.

He pulls Beverly aside at one point, and asks if he did anything to her last night.

“I don’t know, Bill. You guys went to the bathroom at the same time, and when you came back, Y/n seemed really upset.”

“L-l-like angry, or s-sad?”

“Sad. But she didn’t tell me anything that happened. I’m sorry, Bill.”

“It’s o-o-okay. Th-Thanks, Bev.”

He spends the rest of the day trying to remember something- anything- from last night. Bathrooms. Bathrooms.

There are some vignettes. Y/n across from him, in that pretty top. Watching her ass as she walked to the bathrooms. 

Oh, shit. Bill made some sort of comments about those shorts. What happened after that? He kissed her, didn’t he? But why would that make her sad?

When evening rolls around, Bill still doesn’t remember anything new. He’s the only one in the living room, not even paying attention to the TV. His friends come bounding down the stairs, all wearing sneakers and athletic outfits.

“A-a-are you g-guys going somewhere?”

“Yeah, to the new rope climbing place,” Stan replies. 

“Where’s Y/n?”

“She has vertigo, and wanted to stay here. We thought you could stay here so she’s not alone all night.”

“You d-d-didn’t th-think about asking me f-first?”

“We drew names out of a hat,” Beverly steps in. “You just weren’t around when we did it.”

“Isn’t that a l-l-little ruh-rude to Y-Y/n? One of us is g-g-going to st-stay with her instead of h-having fun?”

“No, Bill, it was the opposite!” Richie tries to save the group, much to their chagrin. “We were voting on who didn’t get to stay home with Y/n. And you won! You get to!”

“Wh-what i-if I want to donate m-my win?”

“Doesn’t work like that. Wins are final.”

It’s all BS, and Bill knows it. There never was a hat draw, everyone knows that Bill and Y/n have a lot to work out, and they don’t want the two to go back from spring break with even more animosity for each other. 

Also, they know that the two have feelings that have been expressed so wrongly over the years. Maybe now it’s time to work them out.

“So we’re going to head out now; have fun with Y/n!” Eddie waves, and they run out excitedly.

 Bill sighs, not knowing what he’s going to do with Y/n all night. Maybe she’ll just be antisocial and hide in her room all night, but he personally hopes she won’t. He decides to hang out by the pool for a while, and changes into his swim trunks.

By the time he gets outside, though, Y/n is already there. She’s hugging her knees to her chest and watching the little waterfall intently.

“Hey,” Bill says, making her jump.

“Hey.”

“C-c-can I join you?”

She nods. 

“Why aren’t you with the others?”

“B-because I w-w-won their ‘contest,’”

“Contest?” she shakes her head, not understanding.

“To b-b-babysit you, ap-apparently.”

“Ah. Sounds legitimate.”

He doesn’t know how to respond to that, so he just lets the sounds of the waterfall and the faint grasshoppers fill the silence. He’s sure Y/n doesn’t mind, though. When everyone else complained about the summer grasshoppers as kids, she would always dote on how they’re melodious and comforting.

Bill can’t hold himself back any longer.

“Y/n, what d-d-did I do l-last night?”

She turns to him. “You really don’t remember?”

“I re-remember making a com-comment, which I-I’m sorry about b-by the way, th-that was an a-asshole move. And I-I remember kissing y-you. But then what?”

Taking a deep breath, Y/n continues. “Well, then I pushed you off and told you that you were drunk.”

She pauses.

“And th-then?”

“Then you said, ‘If I want to make out with you when I’m drunk, then I don’t ever want to be sober.’”

That’s it? Bill thinks. He’s not stupid enough to voice his thoughts, luckily.

“Oh, Y-Y-Y/n, I w-w-was drunk. I d-didn’t know what I w-w-was saying.”

“Listen, Bill. I know you remember what I told you yesterday in the kitchen. And what you told me at the restaurant really hurt, okay?”

“Why? I-I wanted to k-k-kiss you,” he asks, genuinely confused.

“You’re such an idiot sometimes!” Y/n laughs incredulously. “You wanted to kiss me when you were drunk, not in your right mind!”

“I al-always want to k-k-kiss you in my right mind!”

“What?!” 

“I-I think I love you, Y/n.”

She’s frozen. Could he actually mean that? Has he been drinking again? Hearing that from Bill Denbrough has been her dream since… forever.

“I think I love you too, Bill.”

He jumps up from his lounge chair, and leans over Y/n. He tucks a piece of hair behind her ear and kisses her tenderly, gently. Her lips are just as soft as he remembers them to be all those years ago, softer than any other girl he’s kissed.

“Wow,” she beams as they pull apart. “I guess I knew this, but you’re a much better kisser than my ex.”

He laughs. “W-why, thank you. You’re n-n-not so bad y-yourself.”

“Thanks,” she giggles. “I just… I can’t believe this is happening. I feel like doing something crazy now, something outrageous.”

“L-like what?”

“Hm…” she thinks for a minute. “Do you want to go skinny dipping?”

“Okay, sure,” Bill chuckles. 

Grinning, she begins to peel off her one piece. She slips the straps off, and the rest slowly slides off her body. Her breasts are exposed first, then her stomach, then everything. Her skin is smooth and glorious.

Bill pulls off his swim trunks and throws them behind him. Y/n wants to tease him about his erection, but she’s way too shocked at his size.

They bask in the beauty of each other for a moment before they dive into the water, crisp and cool on their bare bodies. Y/n splashes Bill right in his face.

He pushes wet strands of hair from his ocean eyes. “H-how dare you?” 

“What are you going to do about it?” she taunts.

“This,” Bill says, throwing Y/n over his shoulder and taking her outside the water. She’s both screaming and laughing her head off at this point. He carries her all the way to the deep end and tosses her in. 

When she surfaces, Y/n makes sure to flip him off. 

“So r-r-rude.”

He cannonballs in, and they swim around, and eventually go under the waterfall. They end up making out and gasping for air.

“D-d-do you want to tuh-take this inside?” Bill whispers.

She nods, and they get out. As Y/n shivers, Bill gets them fluffy towels from a bin by the chairs.

Grabbing his hand, she pulls him through the sliding glass doors. They run around the house in nothing but towels, giggling and kissing and dripping pool water everywhere. The two finally make it to Bill’s room and go directly to the bed (after locking the door).

“Spruh-spread your legs,” Bill breathes in her ear, sending goosebumps up and down her body. 

She obeys and lets him kiss her knees, her thighs, and eventually her core. He pleases Y/n in a way her old boyfriend never did.

When she finishes, Bill holds her for a minute so she can catch her breath. Then, when he turns around to put on a condom, she moves against the wall.

“Oh, s-s-so you w-want wall sex n-now?” Bill raises his eyebrows.

“Maybe,” she shrugs. “If you’re comfortable with it.”

Instead of using words, Bill throws Y/n up against the wall and kisses her roughly. Their tongues clash, and she loves every second of it. Then he goes in. He starts slow at first, but begins to pick up the pace with her approval.

“D-damn, you’re so t-t-tight,” he whispers while she keeps muttering his name.

“Probably because I wasn’t with someone as big as you before.”

Hearing that makes him turn redder than his hair. “Really?”

“Really,” she sighs. “Can you go a little slower?”

He listens to her, and almost screams in pleasure when she starts to suck on his neck.

They both finish in a couple minutes, and are pretty burned out- Y/n especially because she’s never made such rough love before.

She lies in his arms, back on the bed, and traces the love mark forming on his neck.

“I think I love you,” Y/n says for the second time tonight. 

“I-I th-think I love you t-too.”

They can’t help smiling for the umpteenth time in the past hour. Their stars had never aligned until now, and it couldn’t be a more perfect exchange of love. The wait was unbearable, but incredibly worth it. 

Y/n and Bill make each other feel whole, like there was a sort of void within each other, unfilled until now. 

“Hey,” Y/n’s voice is soft and gentle. “I’m so sorry about these past years. You know I have trust issues, but I took them too far and didn’t treat you right. And I’m so sorry.”

“I’m s-sorry, too. I’ve been an ass-asshole to y-y-you, a-and it’s m-m-my fault we broke uh-up in the f-first place.”

“Don’t say that,” Y/n frowns. “It was Evil Autumn’s fault.”

They chuckle. 

Resting her head on Bill’s chest, Y/n asks the dreaded question. 

“So what’s going to become of us? After spring break.”

Bill thinks for a minute, stroking her hair, and admits, “I don’t w-w-want us to c-c-cut each other off again.”

“Neither do I.”

“I think our sc-sc-schools are like t-t-two hours ap-apart; that’s n-not terrible.”

“It’s not,” Y/n agrees. “Maybe we could take turns driving every weekend, and find a halfway point or something.”

“A-an ex-exact halfway point,” Bill adds.

“An exact halfway point.”

They can make it work, they’ve got to. Both Bill and Y/n are extremely optimistic about the future ahead, now that every feeling has been sorted out between them. And even in the unfavorable event where things don’t work out, there will always be Palm Springs. 

Bill presses a kiss to her forehead. There’s not a chance that they won’t make it. The timing is finally, after all these years, perfect. 

[chris-evanslover]

Last Swim Before the Pool Hibernates

Summary: Sex with Chris in the kitchen after you see his Instagram story

Warning: SMUT

Word Count: 1.2K

You were making you and Chris some lunch in the kitchen, washing some fruit to make a fruit salad to be exact while Chris took Dodger outside saying he was doing some last minute pool cleaning before the company came tomorrow to close the pool. The pool usually isn’t open this late but Chris insisted on keeping it open because the weather hasn’t gotten that cold yet. You continued to make sandwiches for the two of you when you get a text from one of your best friends.

‘since when does Chris have so many tattoos??’ what? how’d she know about his tattoos?

‘yeah he’s gotten a few recently, how do you know about them?’

‘aren't you home with him? he just posted a video on insta jumping into the pool, twitters going crazy’ You rolled your eyes, you’d think Chris would take a break from instagram stories since his mishap a couple of weeks ago but he’s still posting full steam ahead.

You go to Chris’ profile and sure enough the ring around his ASP profile picture is there. You click on it and your jaw drops at what he posted. 2 thoughts go through your mind. 1) What the fuck and 2) You needed him now. You had no idea seeing him do a backflip into your own pool would turn you on so much and you guys went 3 rounds last night but you were extremely horny.

Before you could think about anything else the sliding glass door opened from outside and a drenched Chris walked in with a towel wiping himself off, Dodger following suit. You stared at him, mainly his torso at all this tattoos. You’ve seen them plenty of times but something about the world knowing about them now made you want to claim them and him as yours. Chris walked up to you and pressed a kiss to your cheek and made his way to the fridge where he chugged a bottle of water. You were stuck in your place and turned to him motioning him to come to you. He looked nervous and asked “am I in trouble?” “That depends on if you fuck me on the counter or not” Chris’ face registered what you said, his jaw dropping before he chuckled and his pupils dilated.

“What’s got you so worked up baby” he whispered, his hot breath fanning your face. “Your little instagram stunt, who gave you the right mister” you pointed your finger in his face jokingly. He laughed a hearty laugh and a surprised squeal left your mouth when he grabbed your hips and threw you on the counter, almost ripping the buttons off one of his shirts that you happened to be wearing, tearing it off you. He growled low in his throat when he realized you weren’t wearing anything underneath, lips automatically finding your left nipple, biting lightly and sucking while his hand got to work twisting the other one. Your hands flew to his hair moaning at the pleasure.

“Don’t tease me Chris I need you now” “Patience baby” “No I don’t have anymore patience take off your bathing suit now” you practically screamed. He smirked at you and stood back ripping off his trunks before hoisting you down from the counter. You were standing close facing each other, as you were about to lower your hand he grabbed your hips forcefully and spun you around so you faced the counter. “Bend over” he whispered in your ear, goosebumps ran over your whole body. You bent over the counter slowly to tease him a little sticking your ass out.

Without warning he spanked your ass then entered you quickly. Choking on air you gasped at the incredible feeling, he gave you a second to adjust before pulling out and thrusting back into you. “Fuck Chris holy-mmp-shit” you groaned at how he was stretching you, now pounding into you relentlessly. Sex with Chris was always amazing, he knew your turn ons, your sweet spots, and he knew how to make you cum over and over but something about this primal fucking was quickly taking the top spot of the best sex you guys have had.

“Always so fucking tight for me, who’s fucking you this good huh” he continued his fast assault on your pussy, your ass was probably red by now from pounding against his lower abdomen. He smacked your ass again when you didn’t answer him, “You baby only you, shit!” you moaned out. His cock grazed your G-Spot making you go limp against the counter, Chris completely using you. You were close and you knew Chris was too, his thrusts getting sloppier but not losing force. You squeezed your walls around him knowing he loved when you did that “Fuck squeeze around me again sweetheart” You moaned and complied as his hand reached around your hip to your pussy finding your clit in seconds, he rubbed small fast circles to be consistent with his cock moving in and out of you. “C’mon baby give it to me” You moaned and felt yourself so close to cumming, Chris moved slightly and rammed into your G-Spot, moaning loudly you felt your release surging through every part of your body. “shit baby so good for me” He came with a grunt and kept pumping into you, slower now to ride out your orgasms together. He finally pulled out and collapsed on top of you, his front pressed against your back.

He kissed the back of your neck and stood up to get a washcloth to clean you up. You were afraid to move, afraid that your legs wouldn’t work and that his cum would leak out of you in loads all over the kitchen floor. He came back and cleaned you up, throwing the washcloth somewhere on the floor, he scooped you up bridal style almost knowing you wouldn’t be able to walk after that and carried you into your bedroom laying you on the bed. You were laid flat facing the ceiling and he leaned over you smiling, you giggled at him and pulled him in for a kiss. It was a sweet one, no rush to it, just two people in love with each other taking their time showing it.

“I’m gonna draw us a bath how does that sound” he whispered against your lips. “Absolutely perfect” You kissed him once more before letting him get up and head to the bathroom. You felt absolute bliss, standing up going to the kitchen to get the washcloth to put into the laundry basket, you grabbed your phone off the counter as well. Opening it you saw a text from your friend

‘I guess the video left you speechless huh’ oh you have no idea.

A/N: Guys, that video is all i’ve been able to think about to I wrote this absolute filth! Send in requests!

Join my taglist!

[lightningbugqueensfics]

Real Family

Destiel

From the prompt “Cas beating the crap out of john winchester for causing dean so much trauma”(thanks @beautifulsaladkitten !)

*********

When John Winchester comes back from the dead, we get a better look into the harm he inflicted on Dean as a child. Castiel is a good boyfriend.

tw: Homophobic slurs and abuse

Ao3 Link

Dean woke to pounding on the front door. He had chosen this room specifically because it was so close to the entryway of the Bunker, but nights like this it bit him in the ass. Here he was, finally getting a good night's sleep, Cas wrapped around his back, and some idiot hunter just had to show up in the middle of the night. They could’ve at least had the decency to wait until morning.

Cas grumbled against his neck, obviously hearing the noise too. Despite still being an angel, ever since they had gotten together Cas had really taken a liking to sleep.

“Stay here, babe,” Dean murmured, “I got it.”

He rolled out of bed and trudged his way to the door. He yanked it open, still grumbling under his breath about “ stupid young hunter with no regard for their elders. ”

As he walked down the hall, Sam joined him.

“Hey man, I’ve got this, you can go back to Cas,” he offered.

“Nah, I’m up already. Who do you think it is?”

“Claire?” Sam asked.

“No, she’s on a Tulpa hunt in San Francisco with Kaia.”

“Ah, young love,”

“Haha, yeah. Charlie?” Dean asked.

“Remember, her and Stevie are on their honeymoon in Colorado.” The wedding had been beautiful. Both brides radiated joy, and nearly everyone (including Dean, though he would never admit it) cried. How Stevie managed to convince Charlie to go somewhere so far out of cell range still escaped Dean, but hey, it seemed like they were having fun.

“Still?”

“Yeah, they found a hunt up there the day they were gonna leave.”

“That’s rough.” Dean said.

“Actually, they seemed pretty excited. ‘First hunt as a married couple’ and all that.”

“Yeah, well, if that happened to Cas and I, you would be taking care of it.” Dean grunted as they reached the War Room.

“So, have you thought about it?” Sam asked carefully, “You know, asking him to marry you? Fully retiring?” The brothers and Cas were already partially retired, only taking hunts near the Bunker and mainly helping with the research. They were like the new Bobby’s. It was amazing how far they’d come.

“I mean, yeah,” he admitted, “I think I’d like that. I don’t think very soon, but eventually. We wasted so much time already, it’d be nice to make it official.”

Their conversation was cut off as they reached the big iron door. Sam stood in front of his brother to open it, and his back went ramrod straight the second he saw who was at the door. Dean peeked over his ginormous shoulder and felt the blood drain from his face.

“Dad?” 

Dean’s voice hurt him. It was like just the sight of their father turned him back into that obedient little kid, who always did what his father told him to. He was so much more than that now.

“Boys?” John asked, “Why do you look so… old?” Sam was still speechless, so Dean took charge. Fifteen years had passed and it was exactly the same.

“How are you alive?”

“I was with your mother, heaven, I think, there was this bright like, and then poof, here I am. Standing right outside this big ass metal door.”

“Um, Dad, what year do you think it is?”

“2006. Why? How long has it been, boys?”

“It’s uh, 2020 now. What was the last thing you remember?” he asked his dad, then said to Sammy: “Get the holy water, silver, and borax. We can do more tests later.”

“2020?” John asked, shocked, “What the hell?”

“Dad,” Dean said, trying to sound firmer, “What was the last thing you remember before being with mom?”

“The hospital. My deal with Yellow Eyes. I died, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, you did. Then you came back as a ghost to kill the demon, then we went back in time and met you a couple of times, then you came back because of a wishing pearl that we had to destroy because it screwed with time. Things have gotten a lot more complicated since you left.”

Sam showed up with the borax and holy water, which he splashed on John’s face, then he handed him the silver knife, still silent. After a cut proving his humanity, John turned back into a commander.

“Tell me everything. Now, Dean.”

So Dean did. He told him about the end of the hunt for Azazel, about going to hell, about Angels, about the plan to free Lucifer, and about the first Apocalypse. He told him about the deal with Crowely, about the Leviathans, about Purgatory, about Abbadon, and Metatron. He told him about becoming a demon, killing Death and Hitler, and freeing the Darkness. He told him about Chuck, Rowena, and Jack. He told him about Mary coming back and the apocalypse world. He told him everything.

The only thing he left out was his relationship with Cas and that Cas was an angel, because John was sure to meet the man soon, and that would not be a fun conversation if he knew.  

Dean had no delusions that John would approve of his relationship with another man, let alone one that wasn’t human. Hell, his father was one of the main reasons Dean took so long to own up to his feelings.

“So you’re telling me,” John said slowly, “That you two started--and ended--the apocalypse… more than once? Once… because you,” he pointed at Sam, “got addicted to demon blood , and then again because you,” he pointed at Dean, “actually became a demon.” The brother nodded.

“You IDIOTS!” he roared, and Dean flashed back to his childhood. Drunken rages. Thrown beer bottles. Old bruises on his arm blamed on a werewolf, the only thought going through his head protect Sammy . “YOU FUCKING MORONS! Dean - A demon? You became the monster! God, I hope Sammy hunted you,” Sam started to rise to his feet, presumably to defend his brother, when John turned his gaze on the younger brother, “And you ! That demon was right! I told Dean to kill you, he should’ve! Drinking demon blood , Sam? You’ve got to know how broken you are! I was gone, what, two years? You even regret what you did? I bet you don’t you sick bas-”

“SHUT UP!” Dean yelled, shocking himself. John looked just as surprised.

“What did you say to me?”

“I said,” Dean replied, his voice somehow steady, despite the pounding in his chest, “Shut up. You can yell at me, you can tell me how broken I am--God knows that’s the truth--but you don’t do that to Sam. He tried, okay? He tried so hard but I abandoned him. You abandoned him. He’s a good man. All he ever wanted was a normal life, and he never got that. Because of you . So don’t you ever blame him for things that you caused. The pain you put us through. You did this, not us!”

“Get out of my sight,” John growled.

Dean stalked past him, catching sight of Cas in the doorway.

“Is everything alright, Dean?” he asked, “I heard yelling. Is that your father?”

“Yeah, it is,” Dean barked, without the same bite in his tone he had used on John. Cas, perfect as always, followed Dean down the hallway to their room. The tears stung his eyes before he even made it through the door.

Dean sank to the edge of their bed, tears flowing down his cheeks.

“Dean,” Cas was on his knees beside the hunter, a hand resting on his leg, “What happened?”

“He’s back” Dean choked out, “And it’s the same, Cas! I thought we… changed, you know? Got better, stronger. I thought I would be enough to s-stop him!”

“Stop him?”

“From hurting Sammy. Cas… he-he used to hit me. Not Sammy, that I know of, but, not all the bruises I got were from hunts. He would come home drunk and angry, and would always blame me if Sammy got hurt. Even if it was his fault!” Cas rose up and brought him into a hug, “I never stopped him. He did it till Sammy went to college. Then he just left me. I thought, maybe, if he ever came back…. I could finally do something,” he sniffled, “but I guess that’s proof that I’m still the same scared little boy.”

“No, no, no,” Cas whispered into his hair, “Dean, you are the bravest man I have ever met. I heard what you said to him. Dean, that was bravery! That was you standing up for your little brother. Could you have done that fifteen years ago?” Dean shook his head, still crying, “So you see, love? You grew. You are stronger. He hurt you, but you are still here. Still beautiful. Still Dean Winchester.”

“I love you, Cas,” Dean murmured as he shifted his head into the crook of the angel’s neck.

“Come on, Dean, let’s go to bed. We can talk about this more in the morning.”

Dean nodded his head, and Cas maneuvered him under the covers, still wrapped in his angels arms.

With that they settled in to sleep. Dean fell into a peaceful slumber, completely unaware of the fury coursing through Castiel’s veins.

**************

Dean woke to pounding on the door. He grunted, knowing what was coming, and knowing that it was even worse to put it off. He forced himself out of bed and made his way to the door, still half asleep.

If he had been fully awake he might have realized the mistake he was making.

The door opened to reveal John Winchester’s still beet red face, this time the intoxicated kind. It seemed like the few hours since their fight had done nothing to calm him down.

“What do you want?” Dean asked, voice slurred with sleep.

“I want you to explain to me what that was last night!!”

“Can we do this in like, an hour?” he grunted, “I’m gonna need a shower and a cup of coffee to deal with…” he vaguely gestured at John.

“Do you think this is a laughing matter, boy? We need to-” he glanced behind Dean, “Who is that ?”

“That’s Cas.” Oh shit . Dean’s eyes widened with incredible speed and he reached the slam to door shut.

John’s hand shot open and caught it before it could close.

“The same Cas who’s a ‘hunter buddy’ of yours?” his face was now turning an alarming shade of purple as he strode into the room. Dean backed up, flinching away from his father. He heard rustling in the bed, Cas was sitting up.

“You mean to tell me that not only has your brother gotten addicted to demon blood, and you actually became a demon, some hunter turned you into a FUCKING QUEER?” John roared. Dean just kept inching backwards, that same fear from his childhood rearing its head inside of him.

“God, Dean, I knew you were fucked in the head, but this? Sleeping around with some fag, what did they do to you? I knew you were too much like your mom, always a little pansy,” his voice was slurring, just like it did before every beating when Dean was young, “Who knows, maybe I can beat it out of you?” Dean was on the floor beside the bed now, frozen, just like he was back then. Nothing had changed.

As John reared his arm back, ready to bring it down on Dean's face, a calm but lightning fast hand stopped it in its tracks.

Castiel stood beside Dean. His face was devoid of any emotion, but from the look on John’s face, his hand was squeezing enough to hurt. Still dressed in his bumblebee pajama pants and Dean’s AC/DC shirt, he didn’t look dangerous. Dean knew better. John did not.

“Get your hands off me you fucking faggot!” the man snarled.

“No. You will not hurt Dean.”

“Who are you to stop me?”

“I’m the person who saved him. I’m the one who gripped him tight and raised him from perdition. I’m the one who picked up the pieces of that incredible man you broke and helped him fit them back together. I have loved him more than you are even capable of, so I’d say I have every right to stop you.” Castiel growled the words.

“Let me go, you son of a bitch!” John still wasn’t backing down. Castiel pushed him against a wall with one hand still holding John’s fist and the other arm pressed against his throat.

“I’m an angel you ass.” Castiel’s eyes glowed blue, like they did right before smiting someone. He was the most furious Dean had ever seen him.

“You’re a-” John cut off, “You mean to tell me that not only is Dean fucking a man, you’re not even human ? God, you really are fucked in the head, boy.” Castiel pressed harder on his trachea.

“Dean is not ‘fucked in the head’ as you say. He is a kind and loyal man, no thanks to you. He is no longer your son, John Winchester. You made sure to beat that out of him. Sam and I, and the people we have found and lost along the way, we are his family. We care about him. We love him. That’s more than you can ever say!”

“Dean,” he gasped out, “tell this monster to stop! I’m your father for christ’s sake!” Dean rose unsteadily to his feet. Heart beating faster than on most hunts, adrenaline coursing through him, Dean did the one thing he had always wanted to do but never had the courage for.

“No,” he said.

“No?”

“No. Cas is right. You only ever hurt me, Dad. It was always ‘protect Sammy,’ ‘do this,’ ‘do that.’ You never cared about me, Dad! You just wanted a good little soldier! You ruined me even more than this life did, than hell did.

“So, no. I let you walk all over me for my entire life. I let you abuse me into my twenties! But you can’t hurt Cas. You can’t hurt one of the few people in my life who genuinely cares about me. He’s made me a better person, he’s healed the damage you did. I love him, and if you can’t accept that and finally become a decent father, then you can get out. Leave. Never come back. I don’t want to see your face again.” Dean pointed at the door, hand shaking with nerves and fury.

Castiel removed his arms from a shell-shocked John. The man stared at Dean with fury and pain in his eyes.

He nodded jerkily and trudged out the door.

Dean watched him go, mind blank. The shaking got worse, and he fell back to sit on the edge of the bed.

Cas settled beside him and wrapped Dean up in his arms, silent for a time. When he finally spoke, he knew just what to say.

“I’m proud of you, Dean,” he murmured, to no response, “I know it doesn’t feel good now, but you did the right thing. He’s gone now, and you can move forward. We can do it together.”

“Thank you, Cas,” Dean said into his chest, “For… stopping him, but also for what you said. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, my love. I meant every word. Now, why don’t you get into bed and I’ll bring you a cup of coffee,”

“Peppermint hot chocolate?” Dean asked.

“Of course, Dean.” With that, Cas left to fetch their drinks and, Dean was sure, to make certain John had left. Cas was perfect in that way.

With Cas gone, Dean was left alone with his thoughts. He realized how far he’d come. Even in these fifteen years since he went and got Sam at Stanford.

He used to water down his coffee with whiskey. Now he was asking for hot cocoa. He would find a new girl every week, sometimes even more often, and wouldn’t even know their names. Now he was in a steady relationship with a guy (well, angel) who he loved more than anything. He used to let John hurt him in any way he wanted to. Now he was the one who kicked him out.

He wasn’t perfect. Wasn’t even close. But he was so much better than he used to be. And Dean knew why.

He found good people. Sam. Jody, Claire, Donna, Charlie, Bobby, Ellen, Jo, Garth, and so many more. Cas. They made him better. They loved him, and helped him start to love himself.

Cas returned with two cups held carefully in his hands, a concentrated crease between his brows. He silently shuffled into place beside Dean. The angel passed over the cocoa, put his arm around his shoulder, and gave him a little peck on the cheek.

For the rest of the day the two watched movies and funny tv shows on Dean’s iPad. They cuddled and kissed and joked. It was perfect.

Because, yeah, John had screwed Dean up. But the people in Dean’s life were fixing that. And they were the people that mattered. His real family.

Tags: @beautifulsaladkitten @icesoulprincess @themoosegoes-deanicandothis @deano-cas @when-humans-were-good

[wlwmarvelenthusiast]

bro fuck oh my god oh shit what the fuckity fuck fuck holy—

i…………. i am at a complete loss for words

i don’t know how to feel. i had to put my phone down multiple times and take some sips of water bc that nat fic was such an intense rollercoaster of emotions. i was on the edge of my seat the entire time

poor nat for having to experience so much grief and then immediately being thrown into navigating how to deal with dark r and pushing past her emotions. but also poor r for trying so desperately to fight the evil from within yet running out of time

i sound repetitive but wow im speechless

kudos to you thank you endlessly for putting out such an incredibly enthralling story you deserve all the love in the world <3

Y’all are the reason I keep writing. I appreciate these messages more than you know. I’m so glad you enjoyed and I hope to provide you with some more painful fics soon!

[madllamamomma]

Journey Back to the South~ Part 2. No Smut, but still 18+...Just be smart people. FLUFF!

[Hey trash pandas! Don’t forget I’m also now on AO3! Under madllamamomma]

Journey Back to the South Part 2~

Muriel gets to his feet as the mysterious woman turns around to the group by the tombstones, “Mo ghaol!! It is Glenna and Artturi’s boy!” Glenna and Artturi… is that..? The others look to themselves confused but the tall man comes barreling down the hill with a wide smile.

You can’t help but stare up at the tall man, his features are undeniable. You gasp and tug at Muriel’s arm directing his attention to him. “Muri, look!!”

Muriel jumps a little as the man approaches, even he has to look up at the man…And I thought Muriel was the tallest man I have ever seen.Despite his short beard, his longer silvery and black hair, and his age, he scarily resembles Muriel. “Can it be? —Una, is it really him?”

Una. That must be the woman’s name.

The tall man’s voice is booming and deep, just like Muriel’s, but he projects so loudly and clearly, you could probably hear him for miles. He suddenly grabs Muriel by the shoulders and stares deeply at him making Muriel tense and incredibly uncomfortable, but he doesn’t attempt to pull away. The man’s gaze softens, and a smile takes over his mouth. “HA!! Mo bhrathair!!!...” The man lets out a huge belly laugh, then swings his arms around Muriel’s chest and arms, giving him a massive bear hug, he even lifted his feet off the ground, literally taking Muriel’s breath away. “...It is you, my brother!! It has to be!!”

You just gawk at the scene, trying to not let your mouth drop to the ground. This…. this is alarmingly new…It’s like watching two mountains embrace one another.

“Br—brother?!” Muriel manages to spit out the words as he fills his lungs back with air.

The man sets him back down, returning his hands firmly on his shoulders. His energy is intoxicatingly jolly, welcoming and warm, “I am your cousin! Your father was my kin!” He slaps Muriel’s back affectionately, taking him by surprise and making him stumble forward a little. Holy shit! Muriel was pushed off balance?

“Mo ghaol!” The woman tugs at the tall man’s sleeve, shooting him a scolding look. “We just got him back, don't scare the poor cub off!!”

The man scratches the back of his head still sporting a huge grin on his lips. “Sorry, my moonlight! But just look at him!!! Doesn’t he look just like Artturi??” So much is happening currently, the both of you are a bit dazed and lost for words. The tall man sees both your blank expressions and shakes his head. “—Oh right, right, right, right—introductions!” He takes in a large inhale, puffs out his large chest, then slams his fist into it, “I am Gilbert! The Master Speaker! Teller of tales, Keeper of history!” He grabs the woman’s waist tenderly, tugging her into his body much like Muriel does to you. He looks down at her face sweetly, bending over and placing his chin on top of her head. “This, wonderful, beautiful vision, is the love of my life, Una.”

“Oh stop it, Berty!” She smirks and playfully smacks his large arm.

Muriel flutters his eyes in astonishment. “You… you knew my parents?”

“Knew them? Artturi was my best friend! We grew up together! He was like my brother! He even introduced Una and I. We are your kin, my boy!!” Gilbert chuckles with his loud hearty deep voice.

“K—Kin?” Muriel looks at you searching for what to do or say next, still looking like he’s unable to comprehend what is going on.

You grab his hand and you feel a smile spread across your lips. “Muriel…. They're your family!”

He blinks rapidly. “I… I have family...left?...” He looks to the ground completely dumbfounded. “—I-I thought everyone died years ago in the fight with the Scourge...”

“Do we look dead to you, son??” Gilbert laughs pointing to the other people next to the tombstones, still confused looking. “We maybe few, but we are still alive!”

"I... I have family...left." Muriel murmurs to himself, slowly somewhat grasping the concept.

Una finally notices you, with wide eyes. “Lets not forget our other guest!” She smiles tilting her head slightly. “....And who is this lovely creature, Muriel?”

You step forward beside Muriel, “I’m Rhemi.” You grab his hand tightly and he squeezes back, he’s still dazed from all this excitement, but you feel him slowly becoming grounded with your touch.

Muriel shakes his head and starts to slightly flounder. “—She my—my…. ummm…ahhh...” He even seemed to have forgotten what you are. He’s so cute.

Gilbert chuckles as he watches Muriel turn a few different shades of red. “She's your ‘umm, ahhh’,eh??” Muriel suddenly holds his breath looking a little flustered.

You smile then pat poor Muriel on the arm. “—I’m his fiancee.” Answer for him, then he relaxes and starts to breathe again.

Una tuts then elbows Gilbert’s side as he laughs to himself, taking pity on Muriel. “Ohh! Stop teasing the poor cub, Berty!”

Una grabs your free hand and tugs you away from Muriel’s side. “You’re his betrothed, eh? Let old Una take a good look at you.” She starts to inspect you all over. “Hmm….very strong aura… With that shield you made, you're clearly a magic user, but you're a magicianif I’m not mistaken.” You nod with a wry smile. She runs her fingers through your loose ponytail, feeling the small wavy curls, nodding to herself. “Good genes...” she whispers.

She swings open the traveling cloak, grabs the wide part of your hips with both of her hands. You let out a confused low, “Ahhhhh…”.Your arms awkwardly hover over her’s, unsure what to do with them, then starts to shake your hips a little making you blush crazily. She smiles and looks up at Muriel who is very confused of what she is doing as you are. “Sturdy, thick Pelvis,” Una turns you around and lifts your traveling cloak. You feel her eyeing your ass, a chill runs down your spine, making you yelp a squeak uncontrollably. “...good for childbirth.” She glances up at him and winks, “Kokhurians need a good pair of sturdy hips on top of them.”, making Muriel suddenly shudder, becoming flushed and speechless. You whip yourself around swiftly pulling your traveling cloak tightly around your body, trying to hide yourself. Slightly feeling like an animal being inspected for slaughter for a royal holiday feast. She chuckles a bit at your sudden shyness and Muriel's reactions.

Una’s smile falls then looks very seriously at you. Her hands hold your face and she starts to stare deeply into your eyes, squinting as if she’s searching for something behind them. Her green eyes are slightly darker, but are full of wisdom and warmth, you can’t help but relax a bit. She softens her gaze and then lightly presses her forehead to yours closing her eyes, feeling a little magic in her hands again. “Ah… yes, yes, yes…” You keep your eyes open but glance down to the ground unsure what to do. “Yes….. one who came from ashes.” She loudly whispers, pulling away from your face, then starts to lightly stroke your cheek with her thumb. Very motheringly gazing at you and a wide tender smile takes over her mouth.

You flutter your eyes, completely shocked at her words. How—how did she know that?! How could she?? Is she some kind of psychometric or something? Again that’s objects, not people!She lets go and looks up to Muriel, still shaken from her talking about your wide hips. “Hmm…A strong one indeed! She will make a fine wife, Muriel!” Una pats his arm. And once she is done, Muriel grabs your waist and pulls you in close to him. Trying to shield you from any other odd inspections of any kind.

You are however still completely shocked. She couldn’t possibly just know that you came back to life. So what does she mean you came from ashes... “How—how did you—?”

“—Papa!!! Momma!! Who are these people?” One of the women yell, holding a baby, cutting you off from your question.

“Ah!! yes!! Come, come! We must introduce you to everyone!” Gilbert wraps his arm around Muriel, grabbing him by his opposite shoulder tugging him along. Muriel is still so shocked he’s unaware what to do. He’s never had something like this happen before- neither of you had. Una threads her arm around yours. You and Muriel both exchange wry glances, then you shrug. Looks like you both don’t have a choice.

Meeting a crowd of people always makes Muriel a bit on edge, but it was strange. They all took him in like they already knew him, making him already relax a bit. Being around them all felt… good. (Well… that is most of them made you feel welcomed).

Turns out the two people who attacked you and Muriel were both Una and Gilbert’s children. In fact the entire crowd was all their children! Together they had eleven kids, and a baby, twelve in total.

The ones that stuck out were the first born, a pair of identical twins, Ava and Shona, a bit younger but around their 20s. They’re tall…. about Julian’s height (maybe a little taller), but seeing their father doesn't surprise you at all. The two may be twins, but other than their faces and their dark brownish-black hair color, they couldn’t be more different:

Ava (one of the attackers) has shorter hair they wore down, shaved on the sides, and a septum piercing. They are very muscular, strong, rather intimidating. Most definitely a trained fighter. They wore a thick fur cloak like poncho over their shoulders, a dark blue scarf tightly wrapped around their neck, and wore dark leather pants, and a thick, lighter blue long sleeved shirt underneath, making them nimble and ready to fight at any time. They were dead quiet, never spoke a word. But they used their hands and face expressions while looking at their sister. ...Maybe they can’t talk. Deaf perhaps?

Shona has long flowing hair loosely braided in the back with a pink ribbon. She’s rather pretty. She has tassel earrings and a little headpiece across her forehead like Una and Khamagali did and wore a long parka lined with fur, but without a hood. She had a nose ring in her left nostril and she was much more feminine. She didn’t look like she fought at all. But she was just as intimidating looking as Ava, not just because of her height but because of her piercing judgmental glaring that made you a little uncomfortable. She was holding Una’s baby tightly in her arms.

You hold out your hand to the two of them, but they both look at you like you were an ugly bug. Why do I know this look?....They do however soften their gaze and nod to Muriel. Shona even says, “Welcome, Cousin.” but they both still look wary.

Next was their oldest son named Shawn, (the second attacker) he was around 17 or 18. He looked like a younger, (somewhat) smaller version of Gilbert, his hair a few inches past shoulder length, but it’s pulled back into a ponytail. He was the one that was only a few inches shorter than Muriel. He wore a thick parka like-coat lined with fur to keep warm, long thick leathery pants and a belt around his waist. Despite attacking earlier, he gives you a warm friendly smile and greets Muriel by firmly holding his forearm, out of instinct he does the same. “Cousin! Welcome!” He then gingerly shakes your hand and with his free hand he scratches the back of his head. “...Sorry about attacking you… we have been robbed before—Can’t be too careful, ya know?” He has such a young face, it makes you wonder how Muriel looked at his age.

You return the smile and reassure him. “Don’t worry about it! We did somewhat sneak up on you.”

After Shawn was the second eldest girl, Keavy. She was about 16 and closer to Asra’s height, a few inches below six. She had very long black hair half up in a long fishtail braid, the rest down. She was rather petite framed and cute compared to the twins, much like Una. She also was very warm and inviting. Smiles wide and speaks softly, “Welcome, Rhemi! Welcome Cousin Muriel!” She raises an eyebrow and leans in closer, shielding her mouth with her hand so the others don’t see. “...Don’t pay no mind my sisters. They are always that dreadful!”

You turn away to hide a giggle. “Thank you for welcoming us.” She snickers then pats the top of your hand. She’s so sweet.

Una and Gilbert had seven younger children between the ages of 14 to even 4 years old, most of them were boys. It was hard to remember them all or get their names straight because they were scattering all over the place. How do they keep up with all of them?! But the one that stuck out was one of the youngest, a little girl. Muriel and you noticed her hiding behind Gilbert's leg while everyone was getting to know each other.

“Ida!” Una nags, tuting at her, pulling her away so she couldn’t hide behind her father. “Go on! Say hello to your cousin!” She’s around six, she's so bashful, she pulled her small parka hood over her very red face when being told to introduce herself.

Gilbert huffs, “She is shy... as you can tell…” he laughs a short bark.

Despite Muriel being obviously overwhelmed, he gives a warm smile to her. “It’s ok…. She doesn’t have to say hello if she doesn't want to.”

Inanna suddenly trots over and wuffs at Muriel looking like she is feeling left out. He grunts as he sees her, sounding a bit irritatedly, “... Aren’t you supposed to be with the horses?”

She awwos a little in response and Muriel just rolled his eyes. Inanna takes notice of little Ida and starts to sniff her all over, slowly wagging her tail.

The other children scampered off seeming to be afraid. Inanna nuzzles her face into Ida’s little hood. Her bushy tail starts to wag faster and peppers Ida’s face with wet sloppy kisses. She starts a bit, but slowly lifts her hood, a little smile comes across her face as she gets slobbered by Inanna, and she cutely starts to giggle. Inanna seemed to have taken a quick liking to her. She reminds you a lot of Muriel demeanor. Shy, easily embarrassed, and slow to warm up.

Ida steps forward sheepishly holding onto Inanna’s thick fur. She won’t look Muriel in the eye but she obviously wants to ask him something. He kneels down on one knee petting Inanna’s fur along with her. “Is... is this your wolf?” She finally asked occasionally looking up from her feet. Muriel and you exchanged the same face before he answered her. Oh my god she’s so cute.

Muriel looks back and smiles, “No. She’s my good friend. I don’t own her at all…. if anything she owns me.” Inanna headbutts his hand for a head scratch, still affectionately wagging her tail, tongue hanging out.

“W—what's her name?” Ida’s green eyes light up and are full of wonder as she continues to ask him questions.

“Inanna….Nana for short.”

Ida snuggles her face into Inanna’s chest hugging her and enjoying her soft fur. “Inanna… That’s a nice name. You have a nice name!” She giggles as Inanna licks her face again. She wipes off the slobber and her smile falls, looking down at the ground and twiddling her small thumbs. “...I’m…. I-I-Ida.” She mumbles, then looks at Muriel with her big adorable emerald eyes.

“...Muriel.”

Ida steps a little closer to him and whispers loudly. “Are you really my cousin?”

Muriel just plays along, whispering loudly back. “I… guess I am...”

“Is she my cousin?? She doesn’t look like us at all!” Obviously talking about you. Your heart just feels like it's going to explode. She’s so precious!!!  

Muriel stifles a short laugh, “No… n-not exactly—”

As Muriel and Ida keep chatting, you lean over to Una for a moment. “So what are you all doing here?”

Sadness washes over Una’s face. “We've come early this year to bless the graveyard. Last year we found the protective barrier was broken…. My aunt is no longer her to keep the barrier up.”

Muriel glances up with a somber expression. Letting Ida continue to pet Inanna. “...Khamagalai… she was your Aunt?.... thought she was all alone too.”

Una sighs. “My mother was her twin. That’s why we looked so much alike…. We were close. But once we all started joining distant bands, she refused to leave the graveyard unattended…she said she had to wait for someone.” She walks over to her headstone, placing her fingers gently on the top. It’s covered with various wild flowers and forget-me-nots. “I told her to come with me… I told her… that if she stayed, she would die here.”

“...Are.. are you able to see the future, too?” Muriel asks.

Una shakes her head slowly, “...I have others gifts…Glenna, your mother, she was the one who told me that.” She stares at the headstone, looking a little heart broken. “How did you know Khamgalai?”

Muriel stands beside you and holds your hand tightly. You feel your heart sinking. “She…. she protected us…protected me.” It's hard, but Muriel tell them a summarized version of the trip last time and how you both were on a mission to stop an evil entity from coming into the realm.

Una looks down to the ground thinking expecting her to be more upset, but instead she looks almost relieved. “So—She.. she didn’t die alone here?” Una quickly darts back up to Muriel. “Are...are the ones who buried her? Made the headstone?”

Muriel nods, fighting back the water in his eyes. Una eyes track the grogious carvings of the headstone, wiping a tear away and smiles softly. She walks over to the two of you, then grabs Muriel’s other hand. He tenses for a moment, but relaxes right away as she stares at his large hand for a moment, then looks up with a somber smile. “You did a beautiful job on her headstone, my boy. She’d be very proud.” Gilbert comes and wraps his arms around Una’s shoulders, a proud smile across his lips.

Muriel drops his gaze to the ground, clears his throat, tears still welling in his eyes. He curls in lips pressing them tightly together, and nods his head a little. Squeezing your hand even tighter. You can’t help but have tears too.

The entire crowd is very quiet for about a minute, honoring her sacrifice. Una suddenly shakes her head sniffling, vigorously wiping the tears out her eyes, and clears her throat loudly. “Well… That’s enough of that! We came here to celebrate our loved ones' lives, not sit around and mope about!” Her words quickly knock you and Muriel out of your melancholic mood. She pats the top of his hand and leans in a little closer. “Feel free to visit whoever you need. I’m sure they would be happy you're here. Shona, Keavy and I are going to strengthen the barrier.” She releases his hand and turns towards Keavy and Shona.

Muriel reaches out his hand as Gilbert and Una start to walk away. “—Wait!!... U-Una!” She stops dead in her tracks and turns around, tilting her head as Muriel continues. “—why did you call me here?”

Una looks at him looking lost. “Call you? What do you mean, my child?”

“I… I had dreams. About you...about the Steppe…. but you were a bear…you were singing to me.” Una and Gilbert exchange surprised glances at each other for a moment, then smile widely. Muriel suddenly looks embarrassed again, he was rather quick to share for some reason.

Gilbert throws back his head and starts another large jolly belly laugh. Muriel’s face and chest starts to heat up even more. Gilbert grabs his shoulders again and he uncomfortably jolts, tensing his upper body. He’s definitely not used to having someone taller, and just as strong as him around. “You arejust like Artturi! You have been blessed with his gift, my boy!”

Muriel just looks at him blankly, completely lost. “...Gift?” You utter. Gilbert releases Muriel’s shoulders, Una grabs your wrist and Muriel’s, tugging you along. “There is much to tell you.”

Una, Shona, and Keavy start a ritualistic chant in Rune and the dome over the graveyard shimmers strongly. While they complete it, you and Muriel take some time to place new flowers in his parents' and Khamgalai graves. They too have fresh wild flowers covering it. Una and Gilbert mentioned they were their family, it only makes sense that they lay flowers there too. Muriel takes a moment for himself. Last time he was just hurt when looking at the headstones. This time, it felt more bittersweet. You even catch him mutter, "I'm back..."

After the ritual is completed, they all start to make their way east of the graveyard. Una shouts, “Come! Our camp is not too far this way! Bring your wolf and horses!!”

You both follow behind a bit distantly so yo both could take a moment for yourselves. So much just happened in a short amount of time. At least this time is was good. Muriel's gaze finally meets yours after awhile. “So…This wasn’t exactly what we thought would happen!” You say, breaking the silence.

“...No! Not at all!” Muriel shakes his head in disbelief.

You thoughtly look ahead towards their large party. “Are you... happy?”

He sighs curling his lips tightly into his mouth, looking up into the blue clear sky, thinking hard. “I…. I don’t know what to feel right now.... I—I think I’m happy… but this is all just ....so quick… just a few hours ago I didn’t have kin. And now—half a village of people are calling me their cousin! It’s just…. just…”

“Overwhelming?”

He exhales hard, “…Very.”, then scratches his neck. “...is… is that bad?”

“No! You can’t help how you feel, Love! This is....a lot! It’s shocking! We didn’t even think there was anyone left. It’s a lot to digest all in one morning!”

Muriel smiles a little nodding to himself. “...They even know my parents…..never thought to ask Khamgalai for their names…” He smiles to himself a little. “Artturi and Glenna…” Their names seem to give Muriel a sense of pride and power as he says them out loud. You enjoy this new look on his face.

But one thing is weighing on you, you want to know what Una is exactly. “What did Una show you?” You finally ask.

“M-me….” He blinks rapidly. “..She was…younger…..holding me—Singing that lullaby in whatever language. I looked like I was a toddler. I was wrapped up in the same blanket I had for years as a kid.... It was the only thing I had left of them.” He starts to look so sad when he thinks about it, but shakes it off. "I wonder what language they're speaking in."

“I think they speak a dialect in a language called Rune. It’s ancient—thought to be dead. And she did said she babysat you.”

“....I… I just have so many questions...but I’m also afraid to know.” Muriel looks so torn all of a sudden. “...If they’re answered… will not getting to know my parents just hurt more?”

You loop your free arm around his tightly, looking him dead in the eyes. “It’s ok to feel for them, Muriel. You have the right to know, or not to know... You should do what feels right—What do you want?”

“.... I….. I want to know… what they were like. They seemed like they loved each other endlessly. I know now that they cared a lot about me. I... I apparently look a lot like my father—I never thought about that before….Who I look like.”

“Do you remember their faces?”

“Not really…. I did when I was kid. But… they faded away over time.”

The thought of Muriel and Asra as orphans at the wharf hurts your chest a bit. “I’m sorry, Muriel.”

He snorts and shakes his head. “You shouldn’t be…..Do… do you even remember yourfamily?”

You think about that question for a second before answering. “Before Julian found that necklace with my old will, I didn’t have any clue….. But then I remembered my mother died when I was teenager…. I don’t remember her face... just glimpses. We didn't have any portraits painted or anything either. I still don’t remember anything about my father… if I had one—After that, it’s mostly feelings—I know I apparently the spitting image of her. I think Aunt Athena told me that often. I remember feeling that she was so loving and kind… when she’d hug you, everything bad just melted away.”

He softly laughs through his nose, grinning a little away at the vast tundra. “...Guess you are like her.”

“Hmm? What do you mean?” You laugh back looking up at his cute embarrassed face.

He sheepishly scratches the back of his head, cheeks iconically red. “.... when I’m in your arms…. you make me feel like that....like there is no wrong in the world...”

You mirror his blush and you try to hide a stupid smile. Comfortable silence takes hold as you both keep walking, pulling the horses behind. But you finally have to ask. “—Is it weird for you to look up to someone?”

Muriel’s shoulders shake as he lets out a full chuckle. “Yes! Absolutely. It is the strangest feeling…. Feeling shorter! Don't mind it though. It's nice not being the only tall one around."

You both laugh a bit. “Those two have a lot of kids….” You mutter, watching as they somehow caravan them all together.

“I know! How do they keep track of them all?”

“I have no idea. They look like they all look after one another.” You giggle, “Little Ida seemed to like you a lot!”

Muriel smiles even wider. “She’s cute. Nana says she likes her too... Those twins don’t seem to like us though.”

“I have a feeling that it’s methey don’t like… Shawn did say that they were attacked before. Outsiders must be rare.” Muriel looks at you blankly, he’s already forgotten. “... the eldest boy, a few inches shorter than you—That’s Shawn.”

“..I.. I knew that.” He scoffs cutely then sighs, “... just.. lots of new names to remember.”

“Yeah, there are! And don’t worry, I’ve already forgotten about five of six of them.”

You both laugh a little, then laps into a comfortable silence for awhile, watching as the multiple children run and scurry about in front of you both.

—---—---

It look almost an hour to reach their camp. The graveyard was still in view from the camp site, but it was far enough away from out of sight from Khamgalai’s hut. The tents were strange, they were very tall, and circular. They had a variety sprinkled around, some small, some quite big. But one very, very, large one in the middle. It looks like it could fit around fifty people in there.

They also had makeshift pens that appeared to be made off the land. They were equipped with a few horses, sheep, cattle and oxen with very long shaggy hair, the fluffy chickens that you wanted to adopt last time, and last but not least, they had a few.....goats. Motherfucking goats.....One in particular was very off-putting, it was white with yellow eyes and it immediately bleating aggressively as you both walked by. You and Muriel stop for a moment and exchange a very funny look, you both were thinking the same thing. Not another goddamn goat....

From the look of it, people were here off and on for years, perhaps decades. Ava and Shawn guided you both to where the horses were kept. For now you tied them down and kept them packed. There were a lot of questions that needed to be answered. What are they doing here? Where have they been? What are these 'gifts' they are talking about?

Una and Gilbert both coax you to a medium large tent, you let them enter first. Muriel stands there for a moment gazing up at the large tent as if it felt like it looked familiar. “You ok?” You lightly tug in his cloak.

He breathes deeply, closing his eyes. Then lowers his head, and holds your hand again. “I… I think so.”

"Are you ready?" You squeeze back.

He pauses for a moment, then raises an eyebrow. "No....But...When am I ever?”

“Lets go.”

To Be Continued~

Sorry! I didn't like leaving this one short, but I’m still working on the next part. I also made some shitty artwork so you ppl can get a face with with names. There are a lot of new characters, so I felt like that may help with the confusion. 

I should have the next part up here soon, I just need to refine it and what not. As always thank you for reading my hot trash! 

[stuck-in-hawkins]

October 28th, 1993- Reunion

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Fandom: Stranger Things (TV 2016)

Pairing: Will Byers/Mike Wheeler

Read on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24656785/chapters/60958708

Will felt completely exposed. He just stood there breathless, staring, with his heart pounding a mile a minute.

Mike stood up from the couch, with that big beautiful smile. Before Will could pick his jaw off the floor, Mike was over to him in a few strides and had wrapped his long arms around him in a hug. Will was trying to process it all, but thoughts, sensations, and memories were crashing like waves against the shore and he could barely keep up.

His senses taking in all the familiar and new with Mike. How there seemed to be a place that Will just instinctively locked into in the embrace. The secure pressure of his arms wrapped around, the scent of some new cologne or deodorant that combined with the familiar smell of Mike that he could never quite pinpoint. There was the feeling of being small in his arms, and an onslaught of memories that beckoned. Will knew he’d lose himself in them if he dwelled but there would be time for that later. It just felt so good to be held by Mike again.

“Hey, Will.”

Will’s mind commanded, ‘Say something!’ He needed to recover so that he didn’t look like some lovesick puppy. But he was still taking everything in. He had only seen Mike a handful of times since leaving for college. He wasn’t used to how wide his shoulders were or how soft he’d gotten. Since 7th grade, Mike had been a beanpole, tall, bony. But now, all his edges were softened. He even had a bit of a belly. Will’s arms wrapped around Mike and felt… hair? Mike had a ponytail.

“Hey, hippie.” He pulled back from the hug. There were curls in the front of his face that were still too short to reach but it was plain as day: he had a ponytail. Will chuckled, “Since when did you decide to do a ponytail?”

“Since the last time the barber hacked off my hair.”

Will laughed, “You mean that buzz cut? That was two years ago!”

“Yep.” He took the hair in hand and flopped it so that it rested on his shoulder. It was a little past his shoulder. “This stuff grows like weeds.”

“Well, I’m still betting you’ll be the first to go bald.”

Mike held his hands up. “Don’t curse me like that, Will.”

“Sorry, but only models can have hair this perfect without paying for it later.” He hadn’t meant to, but he touched Mike’s hair as he said it. This would have been fine if he had just played it off. But, when he realized where his hand was, he drew it back so hard he hit himself in the chest.

Will thought, ‘Oh dear, God. Could you be any more obvious, Will Byers?’

And there it was, beneath the familiarity and laughter of friends, all the intimacy that had come during that time. The memory of being someone else’s other half was still ingrained in his every motion. The pathways in his brain had been carved out with each touch and a wall had come down. It could only be held up with conscious effort.

The motion was not lost on Mike and there was a recognition that crossed his face. But Mike smiled. Was it sympathetic, guilty, or just awkward? Will couldn’t tell. He mentally scolded his cheeks, trying to forbid them from blushing. But he could feel the heat rising. He hated being such an open book.

Mike broke the silence, “You always work on Sundays? Busy life on the prop scene?”

Will felt instant relief. Work was a safe topic. “It has peaks and troughs. Right now, I’m working on a bit of a passion project, making a monster.”

“Wait! Holy shit, like for a movie? What one??”

“It’s not for a movie, per say. It’s more like a talent scouting thing.”

Dustin interjected, “He couldn’t tell us, even if it was for one.”

Mike turned, “So you don’t badger him for info, then. Right, Dustin?”

“Uhh. Do you even know me, Mike? Of course, I do! He’s got to crack at some point.”

Will watched the way Mike’s eyes crinkled with those familiar laugh lines. And without even trying, Mike had made Will fall for him all over again. A part of him wanted to fight it, to just be happy with being friends. He wanted to save himself from the hurt that would follow. But this love was a familiar and warm embrace. It woke him up from the pain of that morning’s rejection. It was hope.

Mike was here for the first time in years. He was within reach again. He was gorgeous and smiling. But why was he there? What brought him out to Burbank after so long?

“When did you get in?”

“I think my plane landed at… 3?”

Dustin added, “Yeah. About then.”

“Feeling any jet lag?”

“For that crazy three hour difference?” He laughed. “It’ll probably just feel like a long day. I’m hoping that I can power through until 10.”

“Sounds like a late night for you, old man.”

Mike smirked, playfully, “Listen, just because you are some cool Hollywood cat now,” he poked Will in the stomach. Today of all days, he was wearing his crop top. And the contact was direct, skin on skin, Mike’s fingertips in his stomach for the briefest of seconds. Will felt his heart leap inside him. Mike did a double take looking at his mid drift, which had clear muscle tone. “And apparently working out?” Mike was astounded.

Will flustered, waving his arms, “I’m not like a musclehead, or anything! It’s just a thing I do with my friends from work.”

Dustin leered, “Don’t listen to him, Mike. It’s ‘cause he’s single and trying to bring home a beefcake.”

Will’s head snapped to Dustin. He was getting redder by the minute, “What the fuck, Dustin? BEEFcake?”

“Listen, you can’t bring home gorgeous men and me not talk about it. Seriously, Mike, these guys are all 10’s.” He winked.

Will was staring daggers at him, “I am never making you breakfast again.”

“WAIT! No!” He stretched his arm out, “I’m sorry!! I take it back.”

“Too late. It’s Captain Crunch for you from now on.”

Dustin groaned, and flopped over the couch, defeated. Will’s eyes flicked over to Mike and saw him suddenly self-conscious.

Mike caught his gaze and said, somewhat sheepishly, “I can’t say I’m really surprised, though. You're a catch, Will.” There was a sadness in it. As if Will was out of reach. As if he had been the one that got away.

The sincerity of it left Will speechless. Was he misinterpreting it? He wanted to let him know that the door hadn’t closed, but he didn’t want to be wrong and make things awkward. He’d clear the air later, when Dustin wasn’t there to watch. He couldn’t look at Mike’s face now.

He tugged the longer side of his hair behind his ear. A useless and nervous gesture, as the hair went right back in his face. “It’s not- I’m not-” He stopped himself. Take the compliment, he told himself. “Umm… thanks.”

Will saw Dustin smirking. Was he trying to play cupid? Will was going to chew him out the second he was alone. This was not something to play with.

Will desperately wanted to change the subject, “So, how are we going to show him the best California has to offer?”

“How about Gauman’s?”

Will shrugged, “Sounds good. What do you think, Mike?”

“That’s the place the Oscar’s are filmed at, right?” Mike asked.

“The very same. But, when there’s no Oscars or premiers it’s just a regular theater,” said Dustin.

Mike nodded. “Sounds awesome.” Will smiled seeing the childlike excitement on Mike’s face, the kind he used to get before a much anticipated movie or comic release. Will felt flutters and wondered if he would be coming down off of cloud nine anytime soon.

“Cool,” Will said. “I’ll go get dressed.” He needed to sort out everything going on inside his head.

Mike looked down at his own clothes, “Do we need to dress fancy or something?”

“Well, not exactly. You’re fine. But cut offs aren’t exactly something I wanna wear there.” He gestured at his own clothes.

Mike’s eyes flicked down and immediately looked away, his face beat red. “Oh. Yeah, of course.”

Will blushed. Holy fuck. They were both absolute disasters right now. He walked down the hallway to his room and flopped on the bed. Breathe. Why had Mike gotten so flustered? Why had he looked down? He could feel his stomach flipping at the suggestion in the question.

He had to calm down. But everything inside him felt like an amusement park, spinning, and jumping. How in the hell was he supposed to keep himself together? He had to wait until Mike was alone. It would be better to get it all out, clear the air. But what in the hell was he even supposed to say?

‘Hi, Mike! Nice to see you, by the way, I’m still in love with you. Is this a mutual thing? Or should I have gotten over all this years ago?’

He put the pillow over his head and groaned. He could get through this. At the very least, they would be in a theater. It was a familiar space, where they could forget everything else and just be the Party again, picking apart movies. Unravelling cinematography, digging up meaning, and concocting theories and Will could collect himself.   ______________________________

They bought tickets for Return of the Living Dead 3. It was one of those gritty B rated movies that the party had always loved tearing to shreds. After they gave Mike the unofficial tour around the handprints, they went inside and paid for their tickets. They were making their way past the various displays of movie props and costumes encased in glass when Will’s eye caught sight of something. He turned so fast he nearly got whiplash and made his way over to the case. Inside, there was a set up for Halloween: a town of monsters, each with unique and incredible designs. The setting looked like an ink drawing come to life, complete with the texture of hatching lines on the ground. This parade of characters was led by a charming skeleton in a Santa suit and a girl that looked like a cross between a rag doll and Frankenstein. He read the plaque beside it: The Nightmare Before Christmas.

“Don’t drool on the case, Will.” Dustin teased.

Mike came over, “What is it?”

“These are the stop motion puppets from the movie,” Will answered. He couldn’t take his eyes off the figures.

“Oh, Stop motion! Like the special effects for the older Hollywood films?” Mike asked.

“Or like Rudolph,” Dustin added.

Will stared, “It’s like a cross between the two. It’s completely embracing the horror aspect of the medium and combining it with the whole Christmas movie tradition.” He couldn’t get over the character designs, the idea behind it. The premise intrigued him and he desperately wanted to watch it.

“Should we see that one instead?” Mike suggested.

Will turned, “No! No. I’ll definitely have to come back to watch it though.”

Dustin leaned in, “We have to go see that movie with him, Mike. He’s gonna totally flip shit the whole time.”

Mike crossed his arms like he was studying Will, “You think like Labyrinth level freak out?”

“Hard to say,” Dustin retorted.

Will shook his head, “Nothing will be Labyrinth level freak out. That was a once in a lifetime movie. A high fantasy setting with elaborate backdrops and the most insane special effects featuring David Bowie as the Goblin King, himself.”

Dustin smirked, “Not to mention those pants.”

Will stood up, “Why does everyone always bring up the pants?”

“Because it was an enlightening experience. I finally understood what you see in men. And now I know with certainty that if Bowie were to ever ask I’d- OW!”

Will punched Dustin’s arm. “You’re not gonna finish that statement.”

Mike chimed in, “You know better than to speak blasphemy against The Thin White Duke around Will.”

Dustin played it up, soothing his wounded arm. “Aw, come on, Will. I didn’t mean it, I know you get first dibs.”

“How kind.”

They laughed as they went into the theatre together.   _________________________________________________

It was a tradition of theirs that following a movie showing, they would stand around the lobby and dissect it. However, since the theatre was getting crowded, Will suggested they relocate to the nearby diner. They began picking it apart in the car, shouting over one another the most grotesque or ridiculous parts. Will had the edge in these conversations now, because he could usually determine what exactly they used for certain effects. The guys enjoyed hearing Will’s insight into the behind the scenes techniques. Once they got in the diner and got their seats, the conversation quieted a bit and their ruminations became more well thought out. They cited different camera angles, acting, and plot points. It felt like old times.

After they ordered their food, Will asked, “So, Mike, how long are you in town for?”

“I’m staying for the week.”

Will almost dropped the fork he’d been messing with, “The whole week?!”

“Yeah, I have some vacation time that the boss told me I needed to use before December.”

“You didn’t want to save that for Christmas vacation?”

“Nah. A lot of families take that time off. School, you know?”

“That’s cool of you.”

Mike shrugged, “It’s just the decent thing, you know? El doesn’t really care about the holidays too much so I can be flexible.”

And a cloud swept over Mike’s face. Something he hadn’t wanted to bring up. Someone he didn’t want to mention. And Will could see him brace for the question.

Dustin asked, “How-?” He felt clumsy. “How is she doing?”

“She’s okay. She has her good days and her bad. I told you she lives with me now, right?”

Dustin nodded.

“That day I got my hair buzzed? Bad day.” He laughed it off, “I don’t think she recognized me for two weeks. The worst part? I actually bought a wig.”

Dustin nearly spit out his drink, “You what?”

Will laughed. “You didn’t!”

“Oh yeah. My first toupee. Looked like a fucking mop.”

Will joked, “Oh, please tell me you still have it. I’d pay money to see that.”

“No way. It’s haunting some thrift store now.”

Will shivered. “The worst thing to find there.”

Mike chuckled. He asked, “So, when is Lucas getting here?”

Will perked up, “What??”

Dustin suddenly looked awkward.

Mike turned, “Shit. Was that supposed to be a surprise? I thought he already knew.”

“No, it’s okay. Recover it! Surprise, Will!! Lucas will be here tomorrow!”

The smile on Will’s face could have lit up the city. He couldn’t contain his joy. His friends would be back together for the first time in so long. He didn’t see the way Mike was looking at him, the content smile and the eyes that just couldn’t get enough of Will’s warm glow.

Dustin was beaming, “Max will be picking him up and they’ll be staying at a hotel nearby.”

Will couldn’t believe it. “Dustin, did you put this all together?”

His friend got a little bashful and tried to shrug it off. “I mean… I just made a few calls. Lucas told me he’d be home in time for Halloween and I thought it was the perfect opportunity for a reunion.”

And then, something sank inside Will. Halloween. It had been ten years... Was that why Dustin was doing this? He coached himself, ‘Stop. Stop. Stop. Just enjoy this.’

He smiled. “It’ll be so good to see them again.”

The change wasn’t immediately visible to the guys.

Mike suddenly got excited, “Are we going to have a Halloween party or something to celebrate?”

Dustin answered giddy, “Oh, hell yeah! I mean we have the monster maker himself here!” He clapped Will on the back.

It shook Will out of his head. He saw how excited they were. Maybe this whole thing was orchestrated out of concern for Will, the thought of it stung his pride a bit. But then again, maybe it was the only way to get everyone together. The last time they had all been together had been when Hopper found El… She had been broken, disoriented, and wandering around New York City. The reunion had been one of grieving, trying to heal, and being there for Mike.

That was what going their separate ways had meant- only seeing each other for the big things: weddings and funerals so to speak. So, Will watched Mike and Dustin talking animatedly and let himself get caught up in it, too.

“As much as I’d like to bring the studio stuff home, I don’t think I could get it past Anderson. They get extra uptight at the shop with props and stuff around Halloween. Everyone wants to borrow stuff for their own parties. But I might be able to whip up something homemade.”

Dustin bragged to Mike, “It’s too bad you won’t get to see The Werehouse, Mike. It’s like a cinephile's wet dream. They have a full on werewolf! Fur and everything!”

Will asked, “Why wouldn’t he be able to go?”

“Because visitors are banned.”

“No, you are banned.”

“What do you mean, ‘I’m banned’???”

“You were touching literally everything!”

“And that was enough to get me banned?”

“You gave Scottie such agita, I thought she was going to have an aneurysm. Do you not remember her following you around, asking you to put things down?”

Dustin grimaced, “I got a little caught up. It was a lot to take in.”

Mike asked, “So, does this mean I get to go?”

The idea of showing Mike his work space was elating to Will. There was that familiar feeling that Will had everytime he handed Mike his sketchbook or a new drawing. The hope of approval and praise for his art.

Will eagerly nodded, “Just don’t touch anything.”

Mike smirked at Dustin, who groaned, “That is SO not fair!”

“Sorry, Dustin.” Mike shrugged as he scooted out of the booth.

Dustin pouted, “Are you, though?”

“Well, not really that sorry.” He laughed, “I’ll be right back.” Mike excused himself to the bathroom.

Once he was out of earshot, Will looked over at Dustin.

He didn’t want to ruin the moment but he had to ask. “Is there a particular reason you got us all together?”

“Because Lucas is coming home.”

“He was home a year ago. We didn’t get together then.”

Dustin’s shoulders sank and he started fidgeting with his napkin. “You said it yourself. It’s been too long. It was an excuse for us to get together. And… well, it has been 10 years...”

“You say it like it’s some kind of anniversary.”

“I mean, it kind of is. You making it out of all that alive is something to celebrate.” Dustin said it genuinely, his heart in his words, “We watched what we thought was you, pulled from the quarry. We listened to you calling out for help. It affected all of us, Will.”

Will suddenly felt selfish. He’d seen this whole thing as some kind of elaborate pity party, but he hadn’t been the only one to suffer. He hadn’t been the only one to face that thing.

But a question still nagged at him, “Did you tell anyone… about the nightmares?”

Dustin tightened and looked guilty. “Just Mike… he….”

“Dustin you promised!”

“I know. I know. But I was worried, Will! I didn’t know what to do.”

“There is nothing for you to do. It’s something that I’m handling.”

His friend looked at him, anger tempered in his brow, “They’ve gotten worse. Don’t tell me they haven’t.”

Will’s fingers dug into his knees, his knuckles turning white. He felt humiliated. It was true. They had been getting worse. It wasn’t so bad when he had someone sleeping next to him, but on the nights he was alone? There was a 50/50 shot at waking up in a cold sweat. A few weeks ago, he had woken up with a yell in his throat and Dustin’s panicked face above him, trying to shake him awake.

‘Please… don’t tell anyone, Dustin. Please…”

But of course he did.

“Will, you don’t say when things aren’t okay. You shoulder them until something breaks. So, I made a judgement call. I didn’t want you to go through it this year alone. I wanted you to know that you have us. That we’re here.”

Will put his head in his hands, “But why did you have to tell Mike?”

“Because I didn’t know how to help. And it’s damn near impossible to get him out of Hawkins these days. But he’ll do it for you.”

His insides did a somersault. “That’s another thing, Dustin.”

“What?”

“Please, stop playing cupid with me and Mike.”

He was quiet, mumbling, “I wasn’t trying to before, at the house. I was just messing around.”

“I know but the jokes were hitting a little too close. There’s a lot of stuff I don’t want to dig up. It’s complicated between us and we need to figure that out ourselves.”

Dustin looked like a puppy getting scolded, “I gotcha. Sorry.”

Will added, “And, I swear to God if I ever hear the word ‘beefcake’ from out of your mouth, I am mailing your nudie mags to your mom.”

His eyes got wide, “You wouldn’t!”

Will rested his chin on his hands, “You really want to gamble on that?”

He held up his hands, “Fine. It is stricken from my vocabulary forever.”

Mike was making his way back over and Will tried to tuck everything back inside. Mike slid back into the booth. He pulled a small notepad from his back pocket and put it on the table.

“Okay. So what are we doing for costumes?”

And Will laughed. All of a sudden, the years melted away. He remembered how Mike would spend the remaining days of summer planning out their Halloween costumes, their trick or treat routes. The jubilant energy of new ideas spreading across his face, the excitement in his voice. It all came back. This time was precious. Their lives would undoubtedly fall back into their pattern before long. Lucas and Max would likely move back by her job in Silicon Valley. Mike would go back to Hawkins. Back to El. So, Will needed to hold onto every moment and make them last.