i'm so glad the recent b&bh eps finally prove butt-head has some empathy. he isn't no empathy, just low empathy. imho there's soooo much to unpack when it comes to his inner world and why he's the way he is and i think about it all the time
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alright, so the show attempts to paint jack as a sort-of father figure to will. and although will never really leans into that kind of relationship in any way, the implications are there. jack fits a lot of the masculine stereotypes associated with father's: steadfastness, strength, authority. however, one thing that separates jack from the "alpha male" archetype is how in touch he is with his emotions; he loves and feels freely, and absorbs the weight of his grief and guilt in a way that is indicative of his power as a character. will picks up on that, picks up on the turmoil but quiet settling of it, and in coquilles, will sits in silence with jack determined to get him to talk about his emotions regarding his wife's diagnosis
all that to say, i think one could read a bit of practice in will's gesture. a familiarity to the stubbornness required to get a stoic, strong man to finally speak about what's weighing on his heart. combine that with the parallels the show attempts to draw by painting jack as a sort-of-father-authority figure to will, i think it's a safe bet to interpret that will's father was similar in that way
a quiet, stubborn man who works away at the boatyards, no wife to keep up a home, struggling to maintain a wayward son. a lot of emotions have got to bottle up there. i don't believe that will grew up in an abusive household, but i think with the implications drawn, it would be reasonable to assume that will had conversations, like he does with jack, with his own father. one's that are long and mostly silent, but done with the intent of coaxing out some kind of draining emotion. the dynamic there, still firmly in a "i see you as an authority in my life, but you are still a part of my life and i would like to love you in the only way i can", which for will is by listening and feeling with them. will can understand the struggles of a strong, solemn, troubled man without ever having needed to exchange words, a simple look and gesture all it takes for him to sit down across from them and wait for them to speak
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a strictly theoretical (for now) question, but
if, theoretically, one was to write a fic in which a guy is accosted and pressed into the wall by a taller, stronger coworker (who then proceeds to feel him up and rub his dick against his ass), stammers and offers weak protests (ie what are you doing, people are going to see us etc), panics and protests loudly & tearfully when he thinks the other guy is going to fuck him, and comes hard from being fucked between the thighs, THEN breaks down crying, alarming the guy and some others, and for a while is p much unable to voice that he enjoyed it and his breakdown was caused by adrenaline and not like, actual "i've been raped and i hate it" tears, + optionally later he explains that he was actually crazy into it but couldn't say it,
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begging you if you care about steven universe at all, in a good OR BAD way, to go watch 'hiding in private's videos about steven universe, or if you cant take the mentally taxing ones where he debunks others (seriously, i only watched half of the first one so far but it was actively ruining my whole day because the video he was debunking was so deeply hateful and disgusting) then at least watch 'the case for steven universe - prelude'!
as someone whos been a fan of steven universe since it began, and its actually defined so much of my life (if that wasnt already clear by who i am as a person in general...) it literally is just... a breath of fresh air is a massive understatement. it like ive been surrounded by people all saying one thing for so long that i thought i was the crazy one for being different, but then someone finally starts making sense and i realize i wasnt crazy at all. like everything is covered in fog and someone shines a light right through it.
ive never been good with words, most things dont make sense enough to me for that, but man other people can be so good with words, and this guy is one of them.
seriously, its such a relief.
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(not hornyposting just musing lol) so i’m a singer-songwriter and performer irl and i’m thinking about the fact that i go around on a day to day basis singing serious, professional songs that use dogs and brainwashing and cannibalism as painful heartbroken metaphors. and i’ve been doing this for years but little by little all these things i process my anguish through in songwriting, have also become how i satisfy my sex drive. and i don’t know what to do with that information i just think it’s wild!! fun fact abt me i guess. i go out there in public singing about how service is my fulfillment and calling myself a good boy and i sing about wanting to be violently torn apart and eaten and i’m like. yeah it’s a metaphor. yeah dw i’m really normal. i don’t fantasize about having my humanity stripped from me and being treated like a stupid sweet puppy barking and whining for my lovers sick and twisted pleasure what are you TALKING about. i just like the poetic imagery of it. i SWEAR.
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a little too excited over the idea of buying more dvds. i'd have to rearrange my shelf because i won't have room for them. but i love organizing and i love dvds... and i've been considering reorganizing my shelf for awhile
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I wasted all day waiting for a chance to record, seethed and malded for like 40 minutes, and am now finally recording....
And someone is Loud Talking on the phone in the kitchen and it's so loud in fact that it comes up in recordings so I have to wait [and even when it quiets down, I am extremely uncomfortable doing girlvoice talking to myself when someone is not only here, but also in a conversation next to me]
I am so, so normal at the moment
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