#i am so so so fucking normal about this rn omg

[cindersnows]

typing styles in my headcanon

TSC: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog lmao XD

starts sentences with caps usually due to autocaps, doesn't use ending punctuation very much unless excited or asking a question, but uses lots of emoticons! tends to contract words and uses lots of abbreviations, inconsistently uses apostrophes ("I don't think Im ready"), tends to use ellipses in place of commas "Guys... We had homework"), emphasizes words by talking in all caps, uses tone indicators inconsistently

YELLOW: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog, haha.

"Type like a human /lh." uses proper punctuation and capitalisation, doesn't contract words very much, doesn't use emoticons unless to look ominous ("Watch out, Green :)"), generally has more of a sophisticated vocabulary, grammar police, uses tone indicators consistently, only swears when flustered or frustrated

RED: OMG OMG. the quick brown fox jumps over the dog

"bark like a dog. ur below me moron" generally types in all lowercase except when excited or yelling, ends clauses with a full stop instead of a comma or a connector ("guys. there's a BUG. in the garden!!"), overuses all punctuation tbh, lots of abbreviations especially omg and lmfao, uses kaomojis and "owo" ">w<" instead of classic emoticons, uses u and ur instead of you, your and you're

BLUE: the quikc brown fox jumsps over the doggg XP

queen of typos especially when drunk or sad, overuses emoticons to indicate the tone of the message, uses u and ur instead of you, your and you're, shortens basically everything she says ("n then i was liek girllll ur 2 stressed chill out 4 oncee!!!! r u insane m8"), drags out words and syllables a lot when typing, self proclaimed keysmash connoisseur

GREEN: pfffttt, the quick brown fox jumps over the dog.

frequently uses onomatopeia ("pffft, hahaha, BOOM, lalalalala."), generally always uses punctuation, but capitalisation depends on who he's talking to and how desperate he is to impress them (better grammar = more desperate), drags out words sometimes when calm or upset, doesn't really use emoticons other than :/, fairly sophisticated vocabulary but very informal language ("i am trapped in some sort of fucking kafkaesque nightmare"), says chat

PURPLE: the quick brown fox jumps over the dog

dry ass texter tbh, all lowercase except when emphasizing something ("i Did Not hit her i did not"), doesn't usually contract words, rarely uses punctuation except for the occasional full stop, sometimes uses abbreviations but not often, frequently goes "uhhh" "mmmm" "hmmmm" and uses filler words often, picked up saying "chat" from green, whether he's joking or not is between him and god

MANGO: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog.

proper capitalisation and punctuation, takes 2-3 business days to respond, very ominous messages ("Goodbye Purple, make sure to watch your back." <- "chat wtf is he talking about im shaking hes so ominous"), always contracts when possible, never abbreviates

DARK: the quick 8rown fox jumps over the dog

replaces his "b"s with "8"s as well as any syllables pronounced as eight ("she 8, cmon m8") much to purple tsc and yellow's horror, sometimes uses apostrophes but sometimes doesn't, talks in lowercase usually but yells a lot, lots of abbrevi8ions i mean abbreviations, swears every other message, if he doesn't reply within 2 minutes he's in a fight, sometimes uses emoticons

CHOSEN: It jumps

texts dry as the desert, very short messages, will take an hour to respond and it will not be worth the wait, dark usually elabor8es on their behalf, capitalises and has proper grammar solely due to autocorrect, also frequently the victim of autocorrect ("What the duck I mean duck I mean fuck"), no ending punctuation

VICTIM: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog— ah fuck it i dont fieel like typing liek a normal person rn im drunk off my ass

two modes: "The public's opinion of me is very important." <- types like mango or yellow, and "dudeee idgaf abt any of them i coudl literally launch a nuke rn n kill them all but i dont bc freedom will get upset" <- typing without any effort whatsoever, extremely informal, typos galore, drags out words and uses lots of abbreviations

bonus (too lazy to give explanations, or still figuring them out):

PALEO: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog (just imitates the typing of whoever she's talking to)

HAZARD: i am not doing that (uses aac to type, still getting advice on this one)

BALLISTA: GUYSSS HOLY SHITT!!!!!! THE QUICK BROWN FOX IS JUMPING OVER THE FUCKING DOGGGGG (caps spam)

STRIKER: The rapid mahogany fox leaps over the dog. (showoff smh)

FREEDOM: The quick brown fox jumps over the dog (fairly normal, no ending punctuation)

HANGMAN: the uhhh,,,,,,, the quick brown fox jumps over the dog im pretty sure (extremely uncertain)

TYPHOON: THE QUICK BROWN FOX JUMPS OVER THE DOG :P (all caps, constantly)

[itsseohannbin]

I need you to get your man before I do something drastic

I–

I am–

I am so sorry 😳😳

I left him on his own to go make us dinner and he seems to have escaped yet again. I'll be there to pick him up in 5 🤦🏼‍♀️

For the non-tiktok mooties:

[orcelito]

Had my first ever papsmear and that was #Uncomfortable but it's important to my health so I did it anyways

Being a responsible adult is hard 😑

[pepprs]

not to be a pain-crazed wild animal. i KNOW i do this every time. but p*riods are so fucking crazy. like my cr*mps are so bad my body is trying to strangle itself but im awake and i need to be at work in 2 hrs and get thru an entire 9 hr workday as if im not in excruciating pain and im gonna bring my heating pad and my p*in r*lief cr*am if you catch my drift (💀) and i’ll need to use them DURING a busy day in which i will not see any other ppl who get periods in person and using them is gonna be a whole awkward thing. like omg. this is not fucking normal lol

[cynical-ghost]

SECRETS OUT

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Female!motocross!Reader

Genre: Fluffy, Social media-smau

Warning(s): translated French, language? Use of Y/N

A/N: So this is my first post on here, I’m open to constructive criticism. I hope you enjoy, Stay hydrated xoxo

Synopsis: Charles and you soft launch your relationship - fc: multiple

Y/nforeal

Liked by charles_leclerc, yourbff, lilymhe and 654,583 others

Y/nforeal get yourself a guy that buys you flowers🌹

User1 since when was mother in a relationship🥲

User2 is this my new father?

Yourbff you two make me feel extremely single😭🩷

User3 tell us who he is!!

Y/nforeal Dw baby, you still my #1🩷🔥🩷🔥

Yourbff Love youuuu xoxo

User4 Who are we going to rant to about being lonely now…

User5 Mother has turned to the dark side😔

User6 this is sickening… carry on

User7 father??

User8 so we not gunna talk about the first pic?

User9 ikr like it’s only the start, I’m scared of what’s to come🤭

lilymhe ugh it’s a male

alex_albon ???

Y/nforeal Gf, I have an idea…

lilymhe…go on…

Y/nforeal right so, me, you white dresses=wives…???

lilymhe 💍💍

alex_albon tf just happed?

User10 so does this mean he’s an F1 driver?

charles_leclerc

liked by Y/nforeal, carlossainz55, pierregasly and 2,098,485 others

charles_leclerc so how is everyone doing?

User7 now what is this…

User11 twt is bout to go crazy😃

User2 Y/n in the likes?

User14 who’s Y/n

User2 Y/n L/n is a motocross racer, you should check her out

User14 thanks 🙏

Y/nforeal now who took that pic🤔

charles_leclerc I don’t know, I think she was a crazy fan

Y/nforeal 😃😒

User3 oh so this is happening rn

User4 you see it too?

User3 oh I see it alright…

User15 you guys are dululu..

Y/nforeal

liked by charles_leclerc, georgerussell63, yourbff and 743,982 others

Y/nforeal My back arched like a cat...😏🏍️

User1 that is so sick

User5 I can hardly do whips yet😭

Y/nforeal keep working, you’ll get there eventually🩷

User5 Omg ty, I love you so much!

Yourbff I’m still the cool one😁

Y/nforeal you sure about that?

Yourbff Fine, that pic makes you look cooler that normal😒

Y/nforeal love you to🩷

charles_leclerc 😏

carlossainz55 mate…wtf

Y/nforeal 🫡

User6 is this confirmation orrr..

User7 let him cook

charles_leclerc

liked by Y/nforeal, carlossainz55, yourbff and 2,095,985 others

charles_leclerc the not so secret secret, je t'aime ma chère❤️💐(I love you my darling)

Y/nforeal I love you more❤️🫶

User7 I FUCKING KNEW IT!

User2 I waited a while for this one

oscarpiastri Lando is asking to be unblocked

charles_leclerc🫡

Y/nforeal 🫡

landonorris FINALLY I AM FREE FROM MY RESTRAINTS 🙌

Y/nforeal you know why you were restricted

landonorris I do not!

oscarpiastri You can’t help your self when you start gossiping you can’t stop🤐

charles_leclerc what he said^

Y/nforeal

liked by charles_leclerc, yourbff, landonorris and 986,367 others

Y/nforeal does this mean I get to be horny for this man on main?😏

charles_leclerc come back to bed😏

carlossainz55 there are children present..

landonorris I am children

oscarpiastri ^^^

[stunie]

what are ur headcanons for hoshina and kafka? not like fic hc but just like things you think fit them???? i've read up to volume two and just started watching it (lit watching episode 1 rn) and am curious

if we're talking nsfw tho, imho kafka would so do worship/praise. man's single and in his 30s. touches a titty and is just thankful for the opportunity DFLDJSFdsFJ

note: ok wait i haven’t done this type of lil paragraph thing in a while :’) but also omg euphie i’ve been dying to talk about them! (more specifically, hoshina has kinda been lurking in the back of my mind for a bit). also, if u wanted sfw ones too lemme know !! & btw i am also so so so excited for u to see a certain scene w hoshina <33

mdni. explicit smut (18+). 600 wc. f!reader

SOSHIRO HOSHINA.

Hoshina is a huge tease. I mean this as … he’ll decide to give you your usual morning kiss a little more passionate than usual- just enough to get your stomach all hot, but he doesn’t do anything past that. Except throughout the day, you think it’s kind of weird that he keeps accidentally brushing against you, crotch coincidentally pushing against the swell of your ass multiple times, but it’s not hard enough for you to be able to tell if it was deliberate. By the end of the day, you’re practically throwing yourself on him, to which he responds with “Ah— you’re a needy one, aren’t you?”

Also likes risk to some extent. After filling you up with his cum, he has you pull up your panties and go about your day. The sight of you all feverish and awkwardly rubbing your thighs together to try and keep his cum from dripping down your thighs really gets him going, and he’s not against the idea of leaning down every now and then to whisper what he’s planning on doing to you tonight— straight into the shell of your ear, and sometimes he’ll give it a teasing bite before he’s right back to normal. Honestly just likes the process and feeling he gets from getting you all pent up and needy.

Of course, edging. Absolutely thrives on the sound of your voice begging him to stop teasing and just give you what you need. It’s even more exciting when he listens to you, except now he gives you too much— and now you’re whining that you can’t take it, to which he reminds you that it was your idea from the start.

KAFKA HIBINO.

Has the nastiest breeding kink. I think he’d be weak from anything relating to this (i.e. is losing it when you’re soaked, when you squirt, when he cums on you, even the noises your sopping cunt makes from each thrust). Also drunk on the idea of just filling you to the brim, but more so because he just loves to watch his cum spill out of your cunt. Likes to dump it deep inside you, watch it leak out, then his finger comes to smear it with your own slick, pushing it back inside before he asks if you’re okay with another round.

Also … scratching. you asked him to put you in a mating press just once, and as soon as your nails first dug into his shoulders at the initial stretch, he knew it was over for him. He’s practically growling each time your nails rack up and down the muscles of his back, slamming his hips into you harder because he wants you to do that again and again. Also a sucker for when your legs wrap around him to pull him deeper inside you.

And i agree with the praise. I can picture him looming over you with a strong hand cradling your head against the crook of his neck. He’s completely breathless, but he’s still reminding you through a grunt every few minutes that you look so fucking good under him.

[lorarri]

★ . . . 𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 , 𝐉𝐁𝟓

summary , the daughter of lewis hamilton and a 3 time f1 world champion life is pretty great especially now that you have found a special someone

pairing , jude bellingham x fem! hamilton! redbull! f1 driver! reader

main masterlist | football masterlist

yourinstagram . 4hrs ago

seen by lewishamilton judebellingham 76,389,589 others

yourinstagram

liked by lewishamilton judebellingham 102,890,199 others

yourinstagram winter break photodump pt. 5

view comments

user my wife is a madrid...I don't know what to do with why self now

user stay away from my wifey mr. hey jude lookin ass

user MR BELLINGHAM WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

user it couple is cookin ya'll

user love that mother is living her best life

user bae wake up Y/N posted a winter break photo dump

user OKAY BUT THAT LAST PIC EXCUSE ME?!?!?!

user madam who got you those flowers

user jude better be careful or papa hamilton gonna have his head if he even thinks about trying anything with his daughter

user why am I kinda living from the idea of these two being a couple

user are you dating jude?

user Y/N come home the kids miss you

user 4th wdc pending...

user so we all know who the guy in the last slide is right?

user love my soon to be parents

user the queen soft launching wasn't on my 2024 bingo card

view more comments

TRENTSKI

JUDITH

EXPLAIN YOUR SELF

JUDITH

huh?

RICE RICE BABY

did you really think you could sneek your way into Y/N Hamilton's ig dump and we wouldn't find out?

JUDITH

yes?

SANCHOOOO

SO YOU ADMIT IT

IT IS YOU

MEEK MEALS

glad you finally got together

I was getting sick and tired of you talking about her 24/7

JACK RABBIT

I'm surprised he even got the strength to talk to her

STAR BOY

right?

his brain normally turns to mush when ever her name is mentioned

proud of you bro

JUDITH

thx kyo

I always knew you were a real one

TRENTSKI

damn I see how it is then....

RICE RICE BABY

trents going dark lads

in his sad girl era

PHIL CHEESE STAKE

so wait who knows about you 2 being together?

SANCHOOOO

besides the entire intent after that photo dump?

MEEK MEALS

LMFAOOO

STAR BOY

tell lewis he's the goat

JUDITH

hahah funny

let us have our damatic soft launch

obvi you guys know

the only others that know are max, sebastian, and charles

I'll let lewis know when he figures out I'm dating his daughter this Saturday

JACK RABBIT

mate your fucked

TRENTSKI

DAMN

secret forbbiden romance

didn't know you were built like that jude

MEEK MEALS

what do you mean Lewis fucking Hamilton doesn't know you are dating HIS DAUGHTER

SANCHOOOO

pray for jude guys

these might be his last days with us

STAR BOY

he shall be missed

JACK RABBIT

dw jude I'll delete your search history of you stalking Y/N's ig and twitter

JUDITH

thanks guys...

wiss me luck

TRENTSKI

break a leg

RICE RICE BABY

don't die

MEEK MEALS

good luck

SANCHOOOO

you going to die

STAR BOY

what colour coffin do you want?

I'm thinking bright pink and rinestones

JACK RABBIT

do you need a get away driver?

PHIL CHEESE STAKE

before you die get me and ronnie a hat singed by Y/N and Lewis

JUDITH

I feel so loved rn

yourinstagram . 4hrs ago

seen by lewishamilton maxverstappen1 98,328,479 others

lewishamilton replied to your story!

he's a good lad

but if he hurt's you

winning a trohpy will be the last of his concern

okay dad I'll relay that message to him

good

also don't forget to use projection...

DAD OMG STOP

carlossainz55 replied to your story!

¡HALA MADRID!

maxverstappen1 replied to your story!

Christian is asking if Jude wants to come to the team dinner before the livery launch?

also if he hurts you I will run him over with our matching aston martins

landonorris replied to your story!

what does he smell like?

[love-belle]

mi corazón mi alma mi amor !!!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which their relationship is finally in the light.

or

for when you find your soulmate. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

social media au // carlos sainz x fem!reader

warnings - language

author's note - pretty big carlos fic coming soon!! i hope u like it, thank you for reading, i love you <3

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by lewishamilton, carlossainz55, carmenmmundt and 799,415 others

yourusername usually i don't like men but this one is ok

7,628 comments

username MOTHER?????

username NAHHH NOT MY WIFE TRYING TO SOFT LAUNCH A MAN

username the way i gasped and fell to the floor

username i NEED to see nando react to this like NOW

lewishamilton i thought you liked me??

-> charles_leclerc yeah y/n what is this.

-> pierregasly i'm heartbroken

-> maxverstappen1 truly disappointed

-> landonorris i see how it is :///

-> danielricciardo and here i was, thinking i was your favourite

-> yourusername i find u all equally annoying

username ATE SO HARD

username idc about him but can he fight????

username the way im in shambled rn

fernandoalo_official llamame ahora mismo ( call me right now )

-> yourusername mi teléfono está roto lo siento papá ( my phone is broken sorry papa )

username no bc if i was that dude i would be SHAKING like nando is so protective when it comes to y/n

username i would do ANYTHING to be a speck of dust near y/n and nando whenever they talk about this 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

username we can talk it out babe just come home ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

carmenmmundt missing you sweetheart 🫶🏼

-> yourusername u NEED to come and see me rn ❤️‍🩹

username it's one of the drivers i SWEAR

-> username nah bc nando would actually go crazy like

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, landonorris, charles_leclerc and 812,425 others

carlossainz55 dias de verano y amor ( summer days and love )

7,927 comments

username HELP THE SECOND PICTURE????

username hahahahahaha im SO normAl aboUt thIs sO normal

username god i am not your strongest soldier

username my parasocial relationship 💔💔💔

charles_leclerc hope you're both having fun!!

*liked by carlossainz55*

username not to alarm anyone but that looks suspiciously like y/n alonso

-> username who

-> username y/n alonso????? founder of aesthete the brand????? fernando alonso's daughter????

-> username who asked

-> username damn leave my wife and our parasocial relationship alone y'all

landonorris tell her that her cat hates me

-> carlossainz55 tell her yourself???

-> landonorris can't bc i've been blocked since the day i called her cat "whatever pandora let out of her box"

-> carlossainz55 she says that she hopes that casserole bites you

-> landonorris wow.

-> username ISN'T Y/N'S CAT NAMED CASSEROLE????

-> username CARLOS EXPLAIN YOURSELF

-> username im just gonna ignore this for the sake of my sanity!

username not carlos exposing their relationship in the comments omg 😭😭😭

username somewhere right now a grandpa is pulling out his car to run over carlos

yourusername i like the view

-> carlossainz55 you did huh??

-> yourusername yeah the sea's pretty cool!!

username they're in love my lord

username not a driver snatching my girlfriend like the fuck.

fernandoalo_official carlos call me right now.

-> carlossainz55 uh

-> yourusername this is so funny

-> fernandoalo_official both of you actually, i'm setting up a zoom meeting.

username NOT A ZOOM MEETING TAKING PLACE

username NANDO'S ABOUT TO SQUARE UP WITH CARLOS OMG

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by ihearty/n, f1wags4ever, sainzsaints111 and 56,826 others

paddock.club formula one driver, carlos sainz jr. and y/n alonso, businesswoman, activist, philanthropist and model spark dating rumor after being seen together in monte carlo. these two were seen on alonso's yacht along with a few of their close friends including charles leclerc, pierre gasly, kika gomes and others. this is not the first time rumours flew about the pair as at the starting to this year's season, y/n was seen at the ferrari garage, a change from her usual spot with aston martin. we wonder what fernando alonso, y/n's father and a fellow driver of carlos thinks about this pair. click on the link in our bio to know everything we know about their relationship.

2,278 comments

username OH MY GOD

username no bc they'd be so cute together

username y/n lives to give her dad grey hairs and i love her for that

username im already in love with them hello????

username no bc the way they both talk about each other

-> username "he's like such a nice person that you can't help but feel comfortable around him and he's always making you laugh and making you smile and he can make your day better by just his presence and i love that about him"

-> username "she's like this ray this sunlight that everyone desperately needs, she's everything and im so grateful to know her cause she's truly a blessing"

username THEY'RE SO PRETTY

username alr sainz me and u mcdonald's parking lot. u need to pay for stealing my wife

username i would give ANYTHING to know of nando's reaction to this omg

username quick! everyone act shocked!

username we been knew 🥱🙄

username nando on a mission to kill carlos after seeing this like

username IM CRYING THEY'RE SO PARENTS 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

username gone died dead deceased six feet under decomposed decaying

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by carlossainz55, fernandoalo_official, lilymhe and 897,627 others

yourusername mi corazón mi alma mi amor ( my heart my soul my love )

tagged carlossainz55

8,628 comments

username OH MY GOD

username i mean we knew but OSHAHAJAJAHAKA

username THE CAPTION IM DEAD.

username MY HEART MY SOUL MY LOVE

lewishamilton so glad the secret's out!! so happy for you guys 🤍🤍🤍

-> yourusername we love u lewis 🤍🤍🤍

username RUE WHEN WAS THIS ⁉️⁉️⁉️

username idk who to be more jealous of

charles_leclerc get a room

-> yourusername we ARE in a room and ur on the couch sir please move

-> username not charles being in their room 😭😭😭😭

username i need nando's reaction to this

username no bc the way im scared for carlos like

fernandoalo_official happy for you both ❤️ but tell carlos to remember what we talked about on zoom

-> yourusername im pretty sure u traumatized my bf

-> carlossainz55 i will never be recovering

-> username I CAN'T GET OVER THE FACT THAT NANDO SET UP A ZOOM MEETING FOR HIM AND THESE TWO

username my man really wifed up the only daughter of a fellow driver and then exposed their relationship and i respect that so much

lilymhe he better not be taking you away from me

-> yourusername im always yours gf

-> carlossainz55 oh

-> alex_albon well this is awkward!

username the caption has me on the floor and sobbing and crying my heart out

username HER INTERVIEW YESTERDAY WAS SO CUTE I DIED

-> username OH MY GOD I MISSED THAT WHAT HAPPENED

-> username basically the interviewer asked about her relationship status and instead of confirming or denying anything she just said "im in my happy place with someone who makes me the happiest and that's all i could ever ask for"

-> username STOP OH MY GOD

carlossainz55 el más afortunado de ser amado por ti ( the luckiest to be loved by you )

-> yourusername eres dueño de mi corazón ( you own my heart )

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, landonorris, fernandoalo_official and 898,728 others

carlossainz55 yes she stole my pancakes but it's okay cause she's REALLY beautiful

tagged yourusername

username the way BOTH of my parasocial relationships are in shambles rn like

username need someone to be my bf rn i swear i'll feed u cookie dough

username MOTHER OH MY GOD

username she's so pretty im

carmenmmundt the most gorgeous person 🤍

-> carlossainz55 i agree

username where can i get a carlos??? asking for a friend :)

username mother is mothering as always

username can u fight.

username SHE'S SO AHHSJSJSJSJKSSK

username just one chance pls 🙏🙏🙏

landonorris gross ❤️

-> carlossainz55 we don't care ❤️

username they're my parents your honour

username i just know that nando regrets introducing these two

username someone a man is having a breakdown over his daughter dating his colleague ⁉️⁉️⁉️

username they're such a GORGEOUS couple like

danielricciardo when u smack the shit out of me for eating your food :///

-> carlossainz55 she's an exception of course

-> yourusername my love ❤️

-> danielricciardo brb need to throw up

username the difference in their captions is WILD

username LITERAL PARENTS

fernandoalo_official one wrong step and she'll be using a brush to sweep you off the ground

-> carlossainz55 noted

-> yourusername papá stop threatening my boyfriend

-> carlossainz55 boyfriend 😏😏😏😏😏🔥🔥🔥🔥😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

-> charles_leclerc what the fuck is he doing?

-> yourusername he does this every time i call him my bf, it'll pass

username carlos is down SO bad and it's SO understandable bc i would be too if y/n was my gf

username pretty gf 🤝 obsessed bf

yourusername i hate u for choosing the second picture

-> carlossainz55 you hate me huh? that's not what you said last night

-> landonorris just gonna leave now fernandoalo_official

-> yourusername NORRIS

-> fernandoalo_official sainz run.

[tinycoffeeroom]

thank god for bikes | arthurtv

inspired by @mrstelevision 🤍

face claim: steph bohrer ♡

request: here !

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

📍 london

liked by gkbarry, max_balegde, and 98,302 others

y/nsworld about last night ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

view all 3,392 comments

user1 i'm in love with you

gkbarry cant believe i didn't even get photo creds ↳ y/nsworld please forgive my sins oh great gkbarry

user2 y/n!! i think the guys u mentioned on ur twt was george clarke and arthurtv!! arthur posted on twt about george getting hit by a bike on a wall!! ↳ y/nsworld !! let me check his twt <3

liked by y/nsworld, wroetoshaw and 29,492 others

arthurtv first pic taken moments before disaster (at least this one won't leave a scar)

georgeclarkeey don't know what was worse, the bike ptsd or you dribbling down your shirt ↳ arthurtv your mum doesn't mind my dribbling ↳ y/nsworld the dribbling was funnier to watch tbh ↳ georgeclarkeey take that mr television

gkbarry i didn't even notice it was you guys hiding in the corner ↳ georgeclarkeey just wanted some alone time with my boyfriend x ↳ arthurtv stop telling people i'm your boyfriend!!

👤 max_balegde liked by max_balegde, arthurtv and 38,028 others

y/nsworld wine in coffee cups and classic literature in a park, my idea of heaven ꕤ

max_balegde got home off my head and now andrews mad i've ruined dinner plans ↳ y/nsworld andrew baby im so sorry :( ↳ andrew_spanndy could never blame you xx ↳ max_balegde god just date her already wooooow

gkbarry regret introducing the two of you, my poor ears will never recover from this ↳ y/nsworld thats your fault for putting two professional yappers together xx

arthurtv pretty sure that's bride you're reading... wouldn't call werewolf smut classic literature ↳ y/nsworld and how do YOU know what's in the book? 🤨

👤 arthur_tv, max_balegde liked by y/nsworld, arthurnfhill and 30,395 others

georgeclarkeey totally normal photo to promote the newest useless hotline ep x

max_balegde rip my purple crocs... can't believe y/n stole them right off my feet... ↳ user2 !!! y/n at the arthurtv podcast recording?? my y/ntv senses are tingling ↳ user3 i'm pretty sure she was there bc her and max are friends... ♥️ y/nsworld ↳ user2 they've never randomly had their friends at recordings, dw you'll join the y/ntv cult soon

📍 ibiza

👤 georgeclarkeey, chrismd, arthurnfhill liked by arthurnfhill, y/nsworld and 45,028 others

arthurtv thank you spotify for inviting us out! (photo cred: y/nsworld)

user2 i am going to scream from the rooftops, y/ntv'ers unite!!

y/nsworld should receive compensation for having to look at george's bare grippers the entire weekend ↳ arthurtv will bring round some wine this weekend ↳ y/nsworld good boy ↳ user2 ... y'all are fucking with me atp

📍 ibiza

liked by arthurtv, gkbarry and 83,028 others

y/nsworld beach bum 𓇼

gkbarry happiness looks so good on you ↳ y/nsworld i love the bones of you

user2 !! WHO TOOK THE PHOTO I FEEL INSANE ↳ y/nsworld my friend! :)

📍 ibiza

liked by y/nsworld, georgeclarkeey and 49,204 others

arthurtv decided to stay in the sunshine a few more days :)

user3 user2 i fear you may be onto something ↳ user2 i'm gonna eat glass. like i am actually putting shards in my mouth rn ↳ y/nsworld omg pls don't

y/nsworld looking good mr television ↳ arthurtv why thank you miss world

liked by arthurtv, max_balegde and 83,028 others

y/nsworld use code ynsworld for 15% off ⋆⭒˚｡⋆

max_balegde leaving my bf for you rn. ↳ andrew_spanndy not if i leave you first ↳ y/nsworld i can date both of you at the same time xx

arthurtv djsidjief djg ↳ y/nsworld you ok mr television?

y/nsworld didn't even think about what i was wearing when i went to go see mr hill sing about cold coffee, sorry guys you got the wrong arthur xx

POST DELETED

👤 y/nsworld liked by y/nsworld, arthurnfhill and 93,294 others

arthurtv someone forgot to change over to their finsta so i guess it's hard launch time... somehow got the most gorgeous girl on earth to agree to date me, must be my fantastic sense of humour

y/nsworld lbr most of them already knew, we weren't exactly subtle ↳ arthurtv speak for yourself xx

theburntchip it's the big ol' hog you got in them trousers ♥️ y/nsworld ↳ arthurtv ah yes forgot about that

max_balegde take care of her or me and andrew are snatching her real quick ↳ y/nsworld ... i may have to do some rethinking

user2 i can't believe i was right... VINDICATION ♥️ arthurtv, y/nsworld

👤 arthur_tv liked by arthurtv, gkbarry and 104,845 others

y/nsworld told him i forgot to change to finsta but really i just wanted to show that i bagged a hottie ✮⋆˙

georgeclarkeey still can't believe you snatched him from right under my nose ↳ y/nsworld we're still in the honeymoon phase so i may give him back x ↳ arthurtv what the fuck

gkbarry crying into a pint of ice cream thanks xx ↳ y/nsworld you know you're the love of my life xx

y/nsworld also user2 sorry for gaslighting you xx ↳ user2 i have never been so happy to be gaslighted could do a happy lil cry ↳ y/nsworld our fave y/ntv'er we love you ♡

[wonysugar]

you know the drill i fear.. BEFORE YOU GUYS YELL AT ME just know that i’m sorry and i’m trying incredibly hard to get all of my drafts done<//3 IT’S HARD WRITING WHEN NO INSPO HITS YOU OKAY… but for now, please accept some of these fresh drabbles, i’m sorryrjrnrnf

now… NOW…… mid 2023 sugar may or may not have possessed me on this fine morning because hellooo i miss short black bob chaewon BAD i need to eat her out and make her feel good desperately!

cw: waxplay, sensory play(??) i have no idea what to call it but she doesn’t let you touch herfkemf, vibrators, very light bondage

i’m so normal about these pictures omg the femme dom ever,,, the powerbottom to have ever powerbottom-ed this earth,,,, chaewon is the definition of cute girlfriend in the streets FREAKY HOE IN THE SHEETS CAUSEEEJFKS???

she has an obsession with your mouth she cannot help it! she just loves using it for her own pleasure i fear… feeling its moist surface on her wet swollen cunt whenever she’s needy for your touchcidkfk moaning at the slight contact :(( i am also a firm believer that she’d guide you to do it the way she likes it, BUT NOT USING WORDS; indeed, she’s perfectly content with forming a rough grip on your hair and pulling on it however she wants to and whenever she wants to. sometimes she even pulls you away from her pussy so just so she can see her wet slick on your stuck-out tongueckdkf looking at the string of mixed saliva and cum left between your muscle and her core…. giggling so hard rn guys

also SHE’D MOAN SO LOUDLY??:((( i know she sounds pretty i KNOW she does,, and so does she! she gets turned on by the sound of her own moaning, it’s only natural. the way your name rolls off her tongue so sweetly as she whines sounds like music to both your ears and hers. she’ll make sure you hear how good you’re making her feel, how good you’re being for herckdmfnd

now,, if we’re looking at the more RISQUÉ aspect of things.. oh she goes nuts i’m afraid.

OMG WHO SAID CANDLEWAX?? no but yeah on the days where she just feels like watching you squirm and struggle under her touch, she’ll just pull out the candlescisndn

NOW WALK WITH ME. she’s sitting in front of you, you’re laid down on the bed and your wrists are tied to the bed frame with her tie or smth because she’s an angry and frustrated office worker in my heart LEAVE ME ALONE. she knows how much you love touching her, and she knows how needy and whiny you get when you can’t. [devil emoji] SO NATURALLY! she has a vibrator nestled in between her legs and pressed onto her clit, barely even visible due to the oversized button up she has ongkemfm and she’s just pouring drops of candlewax on your naked stomach, the sight of you whining both at the delicious pain and the absence of her skin on you.

she’s moaning so loudly and staring at you with such lustfully hooded eyes, making it even harder for you not to wanna break free from the restraint of the tight tie and fuck her better than the vibrator ever will, like she rightfully deserves:((

also she totally degrades you in the process SORRY NOT SORRY!! she makes fun of you for the warm pool growing in between your legs, moaning how dirty and slutty you look getting wet by just watching her get off,, how you’re dripping for her even though she hasn’t even done anything expect burn you ahehehcjdkd calling you a ‘desperate fucking bitch’ and whatnot,,, laughing at you when you start crying and squirming whilst begging for her to untie you,,,,,, I’M UNWELL.

AND IF I SAY THAT SHE’D ALSO SET ASIDE THE VIBRATOR AT ONE POINT AND START SLOWLY FINGERING HERSELF IN FRONT OF YOU, TEASING YOU BY SPREADING HER WET FOLDS SO YOU CAN SEE EVERY LITTLE THING— [GUNSHOTS]

i fear she’d also describe to you how her fingers feel pumping in and out of her and moan your name in the process,, you’re just watching her throw her head back in pleasure as she fingerfucks herself?? oh girl at this point you’re just whimpering and sobbing like the pathetic whore she thinks you are, trying to subtly close your thighs and rub them together for any sort of friction:((

oh selfish chaewon save me…. save me selfish chaewon

[whyse7vn]

PRETTY -

[ot7 x reader]

YOONGI -

y/n: yoongi

ur so pretty

makes me clench my fist in range

toes curl in pleasure

back arch in need

my pretty boy

sosososososo petty

mmgrrhrhhhhhhhhhhhh

yoongi: ??

thanks????

y/n: wtf

don’t question mark my complements

yoongi: you could of called me pretty in a normal way

y/n: that was normal

yoongi: for you

meaning in reality that was weird as fuck

y/n: the children of today are so unappreciative it’s crazy

yoongi: i’m a grown man

y/n: ur like 5’2

you NEED to grow man

yoongi: ur not funny

and i’m not 5’2

y/n: you’re 5’2 in my mind forever and always

and i’m hilarious don’t lie like that again min yoongi

yoongi: don’t call me by my full name freak idk u like that

y/n: you are too short to be talking in my phone crazy like this what the hell

yoongi: what do you want

y/n: come kiss me on my hot mouth pretty boy

yoongi: could of said that in the first place

y/n: well i said it now

come hither boyfriend

yoongi: shut up

i’ll turn around rn

go back to the studio

y/n: you won’t

yoongi: whatever

y/n: love you pretty boy 🫦

JIMIN -

jimin: you are so pretty

y/n: you are so pretty

jimin: fuck you

y/n: kill yourself

always trying to be like me wtf

jimin: what is ur issue

this was supposed to be MY moment of vulnerability not urs

y/n: if it helps i was lying

jimin: so i’m not pretty

y/n: yeah

jimin: THAT was a lie

y/n: are you sure

jimin: yes

..

YES

y/n: okay ugly ☠️☠️

jimin: bye

y/n: ok but the way we said that at the same time baby that was so cute 😍😍😍😍

jimin: i know we are like goals 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

y/n: ur built like a goal

jimin: what does that even mean

y/n: ur wide

jimin: WIDE????

y/n: yeah cuz goals are wide

like the football ones

jimin: body shame me again and i’ll make a twitter thread

y/n: it’s actually called x now

jimin: you’re about to be my ex

y/n: the one that got away 😍

jimin: the one that was taken away

by the police

or like the fbi

or death

a really really bad disease like the plague or smth

any one of those options would do

i’m not picky

y/n: yeah cuz ur a pick ME

jimin: wide a pick me just say you hate me

y/n: you just told be to die

jimin: but i didn’t call you wide

or a pick me

i know the limit babe

y/n: i would argue telling me to die is worse than being called wide

wide could be a compliment

like omg namjoon is so wide 😍🤤😝

jimin: wtf????

could of used me in the example

y/n: no

that would be untrue

namjoon is good wide

ur bad wide

jimin: i think you’re just pushing unrealistic body standards on me

y/n: how is it unrealistic when namjoon is real

jimin: leave me alone

y/n: you called me pretty

jimin: you called me wide

y/n: wide and pretty

jimin: am i namjoon pretty

y/n: can’t you be happy with the pretty i gave you

jimin: i don’t want to be wide pretty

i want to be namjoon pretty

y/n: maybe i love you for your wide pretty

jimin: you love me 🤭??

y/n: a little 🤭

jimin: heh 😏

no i still don’t like being wide

y/n: wow ur so difficult

you are just pretty

no wide pretty

just pretty

jimin pretty

jimin: yeah and don’t ever forget it

y/n: kill yourself

jimin: i’m to pretty to die

JUNGKOOK -

y/n: BOYFRIEND WYA 🗣️‼️ BOYFRIEND WYA 🗣️‼️

jk: HIIIII

HI

HEY hi

i’m here hello

y/n: i’ll eat you alive kook i will

jk: i’ll taste great

will season myself 4u and everything

y/n: aren’t you the best >.<

jk: for you always

y/n: sighs

jeon jungkook you are so unbelievably pretty it devastates me

jk: pls don’t be devastated

y/n: so devastated

fell to my knees in the middle of the hybe building

pretty boy

jk: i’m about to fall to my knees too

don’t be upset baby

hate when ur upset

y/n: ur too pretty

no choice but to be upset

jk: i’m gonna start throwing up how do i fix this

tell me babe and i’ll do it

y/n: kiss me

jk: or should i kill myself

y/n: oh.

jk: lmk

cuz i will if you want

y/n: no a kiss will be fine kook

jk: are you sure?

y/n: do you want me to be sure?

jk: i want what you want

y/n: right

jk: right

also i think you are the prettiest to ever walk this earth ever and i love you so much and you make me want to pass out and die just like this 😃😀😱😨😰😯😧🫨😵‍💫😵

y/n: wow thank you kook

jk: also it’s really hot outside today so make sure you drink some water

y/n: yes sir 🫡

jk: don’t say things like that ur making me blush >.<

y/n: send proof

jk: you’ll laugh at me

y/n: i will

but i’ll probably twirl my hair and kick my feet too

ur just so pretty like that

jk: i am?

y/n: you are >.<

jk: are we flirting rn??

y/n: we just might be

jk: wow

life is great

y/n: the best

jk: creamed 😣

SEOKJIN -

y/n: baby u so pretty

jin: fact

y/n: don’t play hard to get when ur hard to want

jin: ??????????

HELLO??????

y/n: hi

jin: I WASN’T EVEN PLAYING HARD TO GET

y/n: stop shouting

jin: i just said fact meaning that what you said was indeed a fact

y/n: compliment me back

jin: you know i’m not good at this

y/n: well get good

jin: you are easy on the eyes

y/n: are you fucking 50 who says shit like that?

jin: don’t ever accuse me of being that age again i’m forever 24

y/n: yeah whatever next compliment go

jin: i’m not a dog to be ordered around like this yk?

y/n: GO

jin: the biggest compliment i can give you is being your boyfriend

since i’m so pretty hot sexy and handsome out of everyone i chose YOU to kiss on the lips meaning ur at most half of what i am

y/n: at most???

jin: but i’m already your boyfriend so i can’t compliment you anymore

y/n: make me ur wife then

jin: WOAHHHHHHHHH

babe i think namjoon is calling me rn lmao😭

you know it breaks my heart to cut the precious time we spend talking short but duty calls 💜

talk to you later my pretty petal

y/n: pretty petal?

jin: my queen

y/n: how about your wife 🤩

jin: ok gtg namjoon is getting really angry now babe

y/n: fuck you

bitch

jin: *pretty bitch

y/n: i thought namjoom needed you

jin: no ur right bye

NAMJOON -

y/n: joon you’re so pretty every time you look in my direction i feel as if i am going to implode and explode at the time time killing millions of women a children and ALL men expect you

namjoon: ur so descriptive baby thank you

y/n: ur so sexy

you can’t see rn

but i’m biting my lip at you

namjoon: thank you ❤️

but what are you doing up this late pretty

told you to sleep i’ll be there when you wake up

y/n: you think i’m pretty >.<

namjoon: as always the prettiest

but seriously go to bed my love it’s real late

y/n: you see joon i’m actually in the middle of grinding for that bag

that money never stops can i get an amen 🤑💰💸🗣️‼️

namjoon: amen baby but can’t you do that tomorrow

y/n: joon the money never stops

meaning the work never stops

meaning work4life money4life

my bag? LARGE

namjoon: maybe it’s time for a healthy work life balance?

y/n: ur pretty you wouldn’t get the technicality of it all

namjoon: but you’re pretty too so i guess we both don’t get it

y/n: we are different levels of pretty like ur pretty pretty so all you think about is being pretty ur boobs and iced americanos

namjoon: iced americanos?

y/n: see??

and i’m surface level pretty so i have time to think about getting to the bag

namjoon: don’t say that

you’re pretty pretty and more

y/n: that’s nice joon but i have a bag to grind for right now

namjoon: baby it’s almost 12

y/n: my bag

namjoon: your bed

get into it

y/n: GET IN TOOO ITTTTTTTTT

what do you know about that joonie??

YUHHHHHHHHHHHH

namjoon: baby

y/n: sorry

namjoon: it’s okay

y/n: i’m really tired

namjoon: i know it’s okay

told you not to wait up

y/n: can’t fall asleep without my pretty boy :c

namjoon: i’ll be home soon

y/n: promise?

namjoon: promise

y/n: pbp

call that a pretty boy promise

namjoon: so creative 💞

sit tight pretty girl

HOSEOK-

y/n: hobi u so pretty

hobi: u too

y/n: ??jump

if ur gonna say it back

say it properly

bitch

hobi: busy babe

y/n: doing what

hobi: you would call me mean words if i told you

but maybe i want that

wink wink haha lol

y/n: are you being fr rn

hobi: is fr being me

y/n: hoseok

hobi: baby ☹️

y/n: i was trying to be cute

hobi: and you’re the cutest

y/n: shut up go away

we can’t have anything in this life

sighs

hobi: don’t sigh babe

y/n: don’t be a horny loser

hobi: what happened to me being pretty

y/n: i take it back

hobi: you can’t

y/n: i can

hobi: no

y/n: yes

hobi: :(

y/n: don’t frown at me trying to be cute when ur touching ur dick

you make me wanna throw up

hobi: what if i said i was thinking about you

y/n: so you were thinking about me and you couldn’t even compliment me back properly

CRAZY

hobi: it’s hard to type with one hand you know

y/n: gross stop talking

hobi: ok but is it not hot that just the thought of you gets me acting crazy

y/n: don’t blame me for your craziness what the hell

like you’re crazy because that’s just how you are

nothing to do with my influence

hobi: so why am i jerking off to the thought of you

seems like your influence to me

y/n: bye.

hobi: ok hand off dick i promise

let’s chit chat

you called me pretty right?

what did the queen of blasia say that one time??

the truth ain’t pretty but coming from your mouth something something something pretty 😘🥰😍

y/n: the queen of blasia????

hobi: yeah?

jhene aiko??

you fw her??

y/n: the queen of blasia

hobi: yeah

said that already

y/n: right

we are gonna talk about that another time

hobi: why

you don’t fw the queen of blasia?

y/n: stop talking

anyways

hobi: can i put my hand back on my dick orrrrr

y/n: no never mind

the queen of fucking blasia are you stupid hoseok??

hobi: i don’t want to talk about this anymore

i’m trying to see some ass

a titty perchance 🧐

ur face even

and call me pretty again it did things to me

y/n: jhene aiko

hobi: YES jhene aiko the queen of blasia with her son steve lacy the nations (blasias) sweetheart

y/n: wow

hobi: call me pretty

y/n: tell me about this blasia lore you have

hobi: NO

i’m hard no shinee

y/n: i think you’re unwell and gross

and probably high

hobi: ok but am i pretty

TAEHYUNG -

y/n: ur so pretty

tae: chat is this rizz ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️

y/n: can we have one moment

please

tae: chat is this real ⁉️

y/n: kim taehyung

tae: chat am i cooked ⁉️

y/n: WHO ARE YOU FUCKING TALKING TO

RN

tae: chat i’m scared rn…. 😩😰

y/n: stop

tae: do you think i would make a good streamer

y/n: i’ll stream your execution

tae: real

would get so many views

good first steam

you think people would donate

y/n: no

tae: i’ll let you mod for me

y/n: i don’t like you

tae: because you love me

y/n: love is a strong word

tae: we share strong emotions

y/n: i’ll share a strong bullet with you

tae: try me

literally built my whole brand off being bulletproof

y/n: whatever

tae: when you called me pretty i moaned btw

[read 9:00pm]

real loud

[delivered]

had me like

😩💢😩💢😩

[delivered]

hello

[delivered]

oh

[delivered]

babe

[delivered]

ok sorry

[delivered]

chat clip that

[delivered]

—

kook and jin’s was ass forgive me i wrote them last my fault 😆

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @earth2ela @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @seokmyballs @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @meowgiz @jmnscutie @threeopossumsinacoat @cynicalyoongs @lightningpussy54 @eunthv @gigiiiiislife @lowkeykin @iammeandmeisiam @socksfirstalways @knjlvr06 @lailaisarmy @thvkives @xstfudaisyx @xxxanimangxxx @solstice34 @ml8dy @hoeforseoks @futuristicenemychaos @featjunranghae @jksgirlfrl

[toxicanonymity]

I’m having raider joel withdrawals so I re read the series and I want to just say what a genius you are it’s sooooo goood omg. I just wanna follow him around like a house kitten while he takes care of the crazy world outside 🖤🖤

Thank you, seriously 🖤 Much more to come. I've got raider cooking on multiple burners rn. Ty for stirring them.

If you want him | raider master list

1.5k words, raider!Joel x f!reader

A/N: This is something different. Hypothetical, couldn't get it out of my head. SUMMARY: Joel turns into a prude for a couple of days to find out how bad you want it. Then he gives you what you want. WARNINGS: I8+ jacking off, self-deprivation, riding, rough piv.

When you told Joel you loved him, it got him thinking about how you are with sex. He knew you came, but it never occurred to him that you might actively crave him.  That's what he keeps thinking about now, not the emotion of what you said. The idea of you really wanting him to take you is something he can't get off his mind, and it turns him on. But since he’s always driving things, how would he ever really know you wanted it? He’s not going to ask, "Do you really want it?” No way in hell anything like that is coming out of his mouth.  Instead, he can only try holding back to see if you make a move.  

He doesn’t fuck you for a whole day.  You’re puzzled and dejected.  You wake up at night to the sound of him groaning “oh, baby” over the rhythmic squish of skin in the bathroom. His breathing is labored and his grunts send a pang of desire between your legs. He moans, “ohh, oh—-ahh,” and you slide your hand into your panties. He groans, “Oh God” followed by a drawn-out sigh of relief, and the rhythmic noise stops.  “God damnit,” he mutters to himself. “What am I doin’.”

When the bathroom door opens, you pretend to be asleep, resigning yourself to blue balls. 

----

The next day, he doesn’t try to fuck you either.  You’re sitting at the kitchen table and finally ask him, “Did I do something wrong?”  No, he’s not gonna talk about your feelings OR his.  

“Like what,” he asks. 

“I dunno. Do you still want me?”

“I have ya, sweet pea.  Somethin’ botherin’ ya?” 

Your eyes well up and you're unsure what to say since Joel clearly isn’t going to open up about whatever’s going on. A tear runs down your cheek and he gets hard.  When he adjusts himself, your eyes linger on the bulge in his jeans. You look at it and wet your lips, but it’s not enough for him to know for sure.  

Joel resolves not to touch himself again, no matter how much it hurts with his cock straining against his pants.  He sits back in the chair and manspreads, holding his hands behind his back in a stretch, making his arousal known and his lap very available. His jeans are thin, tight, and stretchy. The outline of his cock is visible on his thigh. You’re looking at his erection and salivating, and it’s taking all he has not to just rail you, but he doesn’t.

He takes a deep breath. He’s getting even harder watching you watch him, his massive hard-on pressing against his jeans.  He’s resisting the urge to even graze it with his wrist. Any relief will have to be initiated by you.  It’s a personal challenge now.  He can control himself, he knows it. He’s just never had a reason to. 

—---

You stand up from your chair. He brings his knees closer together as you approach him. You look to his eyes for permission and he opens his arms. You climb into his lap and hug him, as you’re prone to do–normally when you’re scared, he thinks.  He gently lays a hand on your back to comfort you, but you’re not scared. 

Your crotch is mid-thigh on him, close to his cock but not quite there.  You put your hands around his neck and scoot up.  He closes his eyes as your panties meet his stiff manhood through his thin, soft jeans.  You look down between you, and he looks with you, both of you looking at the growing shape in his pants.  You reach for it and trace the outline of his stiff length.  He clenches his jaw and breathes deeper through his nose. His cock twitches and grows even harder against your hand. He taps his foot, lifting his thigh against your hand a few times. 

"Can I?" You ask hopefully through blurry eyes. 

He nods, but he's not gonna do it for you. "All yours, sweet pea."

You're worried about snagging the zipper since his jeans are so tight and he's not wearing underwear. You bear your wrist down on his cock while you unbutton then slowly unzip his jeans.

You fold that side down and reach into his jeans.  He sighs at the first contact of your soft hand as it grazes his tip and wraps around his shaft. 

You take it out and you're salivating.  You climb down off his lap and onto your knees.  You hold his cock steady as you tongue the slit and take the tip into your mouth.  

"Oh, baby," he whispers as you suck on it. 

Your mouth holds his cock for you and you reach down to take your panties off, stepping your knees out of them. 

You look up at him pleadingly, and he's biting his lip with his brow furrowed as he watches you. 

"What do you want," he asks softly. You take it out of your mouth and hold it with your hand. 

"This," you say. 

"What?"

You shyly look away then return to meet his gaze and say, "your cock?" Like it's a trick question. 

"Oh, sweet pea," he groans. "I told ya it's all yours."

"Can I have some now" 

He nods way up and down like he's never been more sure of anything. "Take it."

You climb back in his lap. "It's so big," you say. "I dunno how."  

"Sure ya do.  You wet?" 

You lift your dress, tilt your hips forward, and swipe your fingers through your folds then show him the shine. He quietly sighs “Mmmm” and closes his eyes for a few seconds. Then you hover near his cock and bring the weeping tip to tease your clit, then your entrance. 

"Can I put it inside?"

"God damn," he exhales. "Just put it where ya want it," bordering on exasperated. 

-----

Mercifully, he at least holds it at the base for you.  You hold onto his bare shoulders and hover over his cock, then begin to sink down onto the tip. You groan at the stretch, and he winces as he tries to resist pulling you down. He gently rests his hands on your thighs and can't help but give them a little squeeze.

You gradually let all your weight onto him, sheathing his thick cock with your cunt. It fills you up and you shudder as he bottoms out. Your nipples harden under your dress. He can't resist a subtle rock of his hips, but just one. 

You put your wrists around his neck and begin to move up and down his length. 

"How's it feel," he asks.

"So good," you pant. "really missed it," you say on the verge of tears as you let yourself slide down on his length again.

Joel nods and whispers, "me too."

"You do it so much better," you whine.

Joel sighs but lets you keep going. This is something new for him and he’s captivated. You bring yourself up and down on him a few more times. His big hands go to your ass, but he's still letting you stay in control for now. You take him in a few more times then hesitate at the top.

-----

He moans painfully while you're at the top, then under his breath says, "Fuck" and abruptly pulls you down. He holds onto you, stands up without pulling out, and haphazardly dumps you on the table face-up. Right away he pulls back, then slams back into you with a sigh.   Your legs wrap loosely around him. He puts his palms on your breasts, wrapping his fingers slightly around your sides for leverage, and he pounds you. 

The table is moving with his effort. He holds you down with one arm so you don't drift away while he rails you harder than ever. Your skin sticks to the table. He gropes your breasts desperately as he fucks you with no mercy. The contact of his tip with your cervix is painful until your body adjusts. 

“Joel,” you sigh, then wrap your legs around him tighter.  His cruel length pummels your poor little cunt, making up for lost time.

He grunts as he gives it to you rough. 

He leans over you and fists your hair. "God damn, you take it good," he mutters to himself as his swollen cock rails into you.  He fucks you with the pent up need of two days which might as well be an eternity with you around. To you it feels like he's filling your whole body up, like your guts are moving out of the way for him. You whimper on the verge of coming. 

"Ohhh, take it," he pants. "Yeahh, fuck." 

You tighten your legs around him and let yourself unravel. The pleasure grabs you violently and you sigh as your cunt flutters around his cock. 

Joel says, "damnit, baby."  Then he plunges to the hilt and stays there as his cock begins to pulse. His neck veins bulge and throb as he fills you up with his cum.  He groans and slowly thrusts into you twice more, still coming. He puts his forehead on the table near yours, catching his breath.  

Then he pulls up his head and looks at you.  He lays a palm over your breast and asks, “You okay?”

You nod, “yeah. Much better.” 

He laughs and musses your hair. He pulls out and you whimper at the loss. 

“I know, sweet pea. But it's yours any time. ” 

You want to tell him “same,” but he already knows. 

----

----

thank you so much for the raider love and thank you all for reading and engaging. it helps with the creative juices.

------

All Joel:@ethanhoewke @silkiers @eiviea @evyiione @xdaddysprincessxx @queerly-anxious @chernayawidow @ambassadortotrilliusprime @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @jasminespringtime @romanarose  @fandomsfallnomore  @djarinxore @blackvelveteen1339   @manazo @wolvesandvampires  @taeslarityy  @str84pedro @lokanda  @kyloispunk  @filthfairy  @fieryglutenfreechickennoodles  @harriedandharassed  @moonlightdivine @worhols @fan-fiction-floozy  @cutesyscreenname  @weddingfairy  @pedropascal-whore  @spideysimpossiblegirl  @feministfanboi @gracieispunk @prettypartyfavor @am-3-thyst @babeincolor @milla-frenchy @switchbladedreamz @within-the-depths @am-3-thyst @may-machin @pedromania91 @sloanexx @paleidiot

[koszmarnybudyn]

I think the Oaks plus Hermie should fucking kick scam to death for that prophecy being fake, i am so fucking close to doing a whole ass jurgen leitner rant about scam fucking likely rn fuck this shit omg. So Hero got fucking traumatized and trained and was put under so much fucking pressure for NOTHING?!?! She fucked up her relashonship with her brother and whole family for nothibg?! Sparrow put really high expectations onto his kids for shit. Like if not for the fucking prophecy Normal and Hero wouldnt be fucking traning at daddies and so code purple wouldnt fucking happen and maybe Henry would still fucking talk with his fucking sons. Jebać Scama, wtf skurwiel jebany omg hold me the fuck down or i will rip his skin of one milimeter at a time with my own nails fuck that guy, cocks in his ass shut the fuck up oh my fucking god his bitchass got me so fucking pissed. I hope he dies in agony, bitch got me swearing in polish i hope he diesssss!!!!

[starsomens]

this is for my ✨ bilingual girlies ✨ I am one which is why this can be grammatically incorrect but whatever

Noah finds your accent ADORABLE. and HOT of course. like, he can listen to you for hours noticing how certain words and/or syllables here and there in your speach sound different from what he's used to hear and it hits the right spot for him;

with that being said, he still jockingly mocks you from time to time trying to do impressions of the way you speak. he never takes it to far though, so it's just an ongoing banter which you gladly paticipate in, intentionally making your accent sound harsher from how you "normally" speak;

and you and Jolly cooperate in making Noah lose his mind with your accents. Hoah goes like "guys, human throats are not designed to reproduce such insane sounds, what planet are you both from?"

you melt when he lovingly says "you're so special, you're out of this world" only to roll your eyes three seconds later when he continues "seriuosly, you're a fucking alien, the more you talk the more I'm sure of it. I won't turn you in though, you're mine now";

he also makes fun of you when you misspell in your texts to him. "darling, are you okay? is everything alright or you having a stroke? should we call an ambulance or an English teacher?":

also, did you know your voice sounds not the same when you speak different languages? no? oh, trust me, HE KNOWS. it never stops to amuse him how suddenly your voice switches to softer and huskier or goes higher and cuter depending of the language. to him it's basically the same kind of "magic" (you call it that) he uses when he sings switching registers, so yeah, your voice is music to his ears. and he loves that more than anything;

sometimes you forget certain words or mix them up and it makes you feel awkward and embarressed. you're afraid that you speak gibberish instead of proper English. especially in front of Noah with his sophisticated way of expressing his thoughts. but not only he ALWAYS knows what you're trying to say, he also makes you feel less in your head about it. for example, he makes up silly stories about him saying the wrong words at the wrong circumstances and embarrassing the heck out of himself (and you're sure it never happened, but he wants to cheer you up so you play along) or he turns your mistakes into something special for the two of you, like an inside joke or a secret code (remember that cringy "I wolf you" line from You? yep, that's what I'm talking about). so when he shows you his new song which is his personal love anthem to you and the greatest thing he's ever written to this day and you say it's terrible instead of terrific, he looks as proud as he only can be and jokingly says he tried his best to make it the worst song in the history of music. from now on all of his song are "terrible". and all about you, of course;

remember when he said that Jolly comes up with the greatest lyrics without realizing it because he thinks in Swedish? same applies to you. it truly fascinates Noah to hear you saying the most beautiful genius things based on some sayings in your first language. he takes inspiration from that and includes it in his lyrics without saying that and you realize it afterwards when you hear him singing it;

he's for sure secretly learning your language just to surprise you all of the sudden. like, you two have a movie night date on your big comfy couch, he brushes his fingers through you hair and says "I love you" in your language and you automatically reply back the same way and then go "wait, did you just..?" and he sits there smiling from ear to ear and being so hella proud of himself, throwing at you one compliment in your mother tongue after another. and you have no idea when or how he managed to learn it all but it makes you love him even more;

which is why the next thing he'll learn from you will be the dirty talk. oh god, help us all lol

ANON SHIT UP RN

COME TO MY HOUSE SO I CAN GIVE U KISSES STOOPPPPPPP OMG MY HEART

So I was born here, but I want to say that, technically my first language was Spanish. I spent a lot of time with my grandmother and I had heard from someone that the way you express your emotions, whatever language you use is your first language, which I thought was a very cool concept. And a lot of times there are words that I don’t know in English so I just resort to Spanish but oh my God literally made me smell so big I’m at work and the noise I let out was crazyOMMGGGGG

I was going to write a small story on this, but you beat me to the punch, but I’m not complaining. I will add onto this later on thank you thank you thank you thank you again.🩷🩷🩷🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

[bonezlyy]

I DIED 🫶🏼

I said I would be insansley active on this account but I wasn’t and forgot about it immediately

Im trying I promise you I just didn’t know what to post

WE’RE GONNA TALK ABOUT THE FRIEND GROUPS

WELL THEYRE ALL ONE BIG FRIEND GROUP AND LOVE EACHOTHER EQUALLY BUT THEY HAVE SPECIFIC THINGIES

OKAY SO

THIS IS GONNA BE A WEIRD BIG INFODUMP INSTEAD OF A NORMAL LIST

Starting with Error, Geno, Sci and Night. These fucking nerds 💕 Smart guys that talk about smart guy stuff (Idk what kind of smart things because Im not smart myself but still). They’re all calm and collected people that like to sit together and read books because they’re cute and silly guys. Geno and Night talk about Space stuff while Error and Sci talk about science and tech stuff.

NUMBER 2 IS THE STARS💕

I am so obsessed with Drinkberry you can not stop me. They’re all really silly and positive people and they all kiss like muah muah muah. And btw drinkberry, afterdeath and Scifell are the only canon ships you get. Idk what the other ones are I might just make them all kiss tbh. Well actually you might get Cherrberry too who knows. BUT ANYWAY BACK TO THE STARS. They just sit in on of their dorm’s and watch movies and kiss and cuddle I love them sm

NUMBER 3

I CANT TELL YOU HOW ODDLY OBSESSED I AM WITH REAPER, FELL AND PLUM BEING FRIENDS (cutely changes Lust from Hearts to Plum) THEY MET IN YEAR 7 WHEN NONE OF THEM WERE DOING SWIMMING AND IT BASICALLY WENT LIKE THIS

Teacher: Okay then so what’s your excuse today

All 3 of them at the same time by the power of gay friendship: I have tits

AND THEY JUST LOOKED AT EACHOTHER LIKE ???

And then they talked about being trans for the whole lesson, and then found out they were all bi and decided to be friends until one of them inevitably dies from alcohol poisoning 🫶🏼

I love them sm, they kiss in the best friend way that i long for

I need to get a grip girl they’re just skeletons pls

Obviously Cross, Dust, Horror, and Killer

These little heathens omg

They just create havoc wherever they go, accidental or not

This one is self explanatory tbh

AND THEN THE ART KIDS

Ink, Error, Plum, Reaper, Geno

Error and Plum are in textiles

Ink, Reaper and Geno do like regular art, idk what the word is for it but painting, drawing, charcoals and all that

Ink, Reaper and geno design and draw cool designs for Plum and Error to make as practice

ANYWAY THOSE ARE ALL I CAN THINK OF RN

I should probably start actually writing this soon

Ill post a link to the chapter when I do 💀

Help me I cant tell if my brother has a friend round or if he just randomly has a really good sound system and it sounds like theres someone in his room

Either way I cant leave my room because my social anxiety his horrendous and I will kms if I am seen 🙏🏼

[hongtiddiez]

4 minutes ep 1 raw reactions

idk if i'm gonna delve too deep into this and do my normal analysis so for now i'll just type up my raw reactions as i'm watching lmao.

the title sequence is fucking stunning, obsessed.

ooh he has a maine coon. rich boy maybe? expensive cat and nice apartment.

i really enjoy that the heartbeat sounds in the elevator scene sound like a heartbeat heard through an ultrasound. very interesting.

but umm. if you're having severe chest pain and trouble breathing please see yourself to the hospital my friend???

oh ok definitely a rich boy, hello fancy car.

AAAAAA BAS, IT'S BAS, LSKJGAI MY LOVE, GOD HE LOOKS SO GOOD

the music in this show is fucking gorgeous but like... also why so dramatic

ok so korn: transport -> investments (secret operation??? tf?) and they want great: university -> transport. got it.

ooh 12:39 okay i see you.

ooh 12:43 ok, 4 minutes, i'm listening.

OH. OH DON'T RUN THO

also like why was there a pedestrian in there???

OH. OK. INTERESTING.

i also hate that great initially ran bc now it's gonna take so much for me to like his char, which i'm sure is the point but still (；′⌒`)

aah. okay. i understand. it seems like she didn't want to do it tho. like yeah maybe suicide but... kinda seemed like suicide under coercion? or some form of intense external pressure.

HOLY SHIT JOB. THEY LET HIM OUT OF THE BE ON CLOUD VAULT. RUN BBY YOU'RE FREE.

HE'S SO THIN??? BBY ARE YOU EATING OKAY? i mean good for him if it was healthy and what he wanted tho.

this other doctor is so fucking hot tho who the fuck are you sir god DAMN. jaw for days.

ooh those dark spots on the ultrasound look like internal bleeding.

OH I'M SO SEXY AND SMART.

sexy doctor why shifty eyed??? i have a weird feeling about him. ok his name is tyme. as of rn we do not trust tyme.

more gorgeous music tho.

oh don't twirl your scissors like a douche.

he's got dead eyes and not much for facial expressions, he's freaking me out.

ew you don't even know your patient's name??? I DO NOT LIKE HIM SAM I AM, I DO NOT LIKE TYME EGGS AND HAM.

ok i dont like tyme but i WOULD like to see him and job's character fuck nasty. i am not immune to yaoi propaganda.

GOD BAS IS SO HOT I CAN'T GET OVER IT. I'VE MISSED HIM SO FUCKING MUCH. i love bible a lot but bas is everything to me. i used to reblog the same picture of him everyday. that's my sweet cheese, my good time boy, my rotten soldier.

oh i don't like this set up tho. this feels human trafficky. or like a no way in no way out. mmmm baby what do y smell is it death? OH LMAO IT'S GAMBLING. same thing kinda.

korn seems sensitive to smells, or maybe just smoke. he's just like me fr.

oooh curly hair girl isn't here to gamble, she's here for info of some kind.

OH BOYFRIEND TIME. OHHH OH I GET TO SEE BAS KISS MEN. LIKE I KNEW BC I SAW THE GIFS WHEN IT FIRST STARTED BUT UGH. I WAS NOT PREPARED. FUCK HE'S SO HOT. I CAN'T FUCKING DO THIS. HELP.

the fact that he opens up to his boyfriend and talks about his troubles as much as he reasonably can o(T ▽ To)

oh my god get OFF HIM there's no way your refractory period is that short.

not a huge fan of how korn came over, dumped his issues, had sex, and left tho. not great.

obsessed with this asymmetrical collar of great's shirt tho.

yeah i do love that no one fucking asks if great is ok, how he's doing, etc. he just went through something horribly traumatic and he could've been hurt, like. yuck. and his mom seems sweet but the fake sweet, like saccharine.

ooh why does his watch say 11:00??? something's gonna happen, huh.

fuck bas has an fantastic ass. i know we saw it but it somehow looks even better in those pants, my god.

7:13...

ugh i love brothers that can only be (mostly) themselves around each other. i really hope that's the direction this is going. two gorgeous gorgeous men on my screen, just an absolute feast for my eyes.

omg wait. wait. korn doesn't like the smell of cigarettes and he doesn't want great smoking. is there cigarette trauma? or does his dislike of cigarettes come from his concern for his brother's health?

OH facial expressions from tyme!! what a little grandma's boy.

11 am....

exploring the psychological depths of near-death experiences. the '4-minutes' phenomenon.

INCHRESTING. was manee coerced into suicide by someone trying to obtain a real time test subject for this phenomenon???

ooh he took the stairs today.

4th floor... 1:10 (13:10)... room 4... 1:11 (13:11)... ran into tyme outside room 1... at 1:14 (13:14)...

so in theory is each cardiac event he's suffering technically a near-death moment which is triggering the 4 minutes phenomenon where he has an out of body moment where he can see future events???

oooh he ran into him again. perhaps to show some things are simply inevitable?

damn the end sequence is gorgeous too.

fuck. i might be obsessed. uh oh.

god damn it sammon, you got me again.

wait so back to when it was 7:13pm... 19:13... 9+1=10, 3+1=4 so more 1s and 4s ₍ ˶•̀⤙•˶ ₎ hmmm

idk if i'm cooking or burning the kitchen down but i'm excited to find out