#i am taking a quick shower i still smell like bug spray

[marblerose-rue]

click for better quality!

princess/request

do you think she's the type to beg for a little whipped cream (as a treat)

[joonkorre]

its crazy late but

@drarrymicrofic prompt: blanket fort

(there’s no plot. none. just dudes being guys, guys being pals)

(caution: not very micro, more like a one shot. a whole lot of anecdotes. i’m writing this under a blanket with snow beating at my window, so of course this has to be very soft and warm. you have been warned)

“Hello?” Harry says into the dark. He’s just gotten home and instead of seeing the familiar orange hue of their beetle-shaped lamp (a gift from Luna, of course), there’s a single sliver of moonlight slipping through the curtains. Nothing else seems to exist in the living room but the echo of Harry’s greeting. Tangerine and sage drift into his nose, followed by the bitter tang of smoke. The scent of Draco’s favorite candle, newly extinguished.

Draco just left. Discovered a breakthrough in his research and fled to the Ministry lab, maybe.

Harry sighs. Unlaces his boots and hangs up his coat absentmindedly only for it to crumple onto the floor. Another sigh. He bends and retrieves it, deciding instead to throw it in the laundry bin. Might as well; he’s been trudging around in Dayhound mucus for hours and neither his dragonhide boots nor coat were spared. 

Walking into the kitchen, Harry grabs a glass from the drying rack and pours himself water from the pitcher in the fridge. It’s ridiculous how a simple act like this can drain his energy so, but it does. Curse breaking isn’t a walk in the park; even walking hurts, considering the amount of magic he expends on shite like a 500-year-old wailing locket on a day to day basis. Exposure to different kinds of magic - dark, Old Magick, elemental, countlessly and endlessly more- for 8 hours straight more often than not result in a fierce ringing in his temples and pinpricks on his skin.

After years of doing it, he can scarcely tolerate one Portkey trip from wherever he’s assigned to back to the main headquarter before getting uncontrollable shivers. Another 30 minutes on the metro, then a 10-minute walk home. In addition, Harry has to sleep for at least 8 hours every night to replenish his energy. Morning comes, he wakes up, Apparates to the headquarter, and the cycle continues.

Why does he even stick with curse breaking at this point? Right, a wry grin graces Harry’s lips, Draco thinks the uniform is hot. Oh, and can’t forget the job benefits, insurance, whole nine yards.

With the glass now rinsed and settled once more on the drying rack, Harry drags his feet to the bedroom. The clock - an antique Draco stole from his cheating ex - hits 7:18 PM, but getting ready to go to sleep sure sounds like a decent idea. Harry palms the back of his aching neck and winces. He’d go shower, scrub the dirt and tension off his limbs, and maybe heat up the leftovers from two days-

“There you are. I was wondering how much longer drinking water could take.”

Harry looks up from his slippered feet to see Draco. Or, more specifically, Draco’s silhouette. Behind some kind of white cloth. A white cloth that’s conveniently placed where the focus of the bedroom should’ve been. 

The relief at seeing his husband evaporates.

“What,” Harry says, “where’s our bed.”

Draco’s silhouette crawls to the opening of the cloth… tent-shaped thing. Pewter grey eyes peer at him behind strands of near-platinum blonde, its icy color soothed by the orange tint of… ah, so he’s brought the bug lamp in here. Neat.

“I,” Draco answers. Pauses. “Might have brought it somewhere else.”

“Somewhere else.”

“Yes.”

Harry shakes his head. An exasperated chuckle escapes his lips.

“Is ‘somewhere else’ the recycling center?”

“Why,” Draco flops down on the floor, appearing tired of holding himself up on his elbows for more than 10 seconds. It’s peculiar to see, the gesture a bit ungraceful for someone like him. Harry is helplessly in love amused. “Do my ears deceive me? Am I being confronted, cornered, accosted for being a good husband? Were the 5 minutes it took to Shrink and Levitate the wretched old thing away from our safe haven worth your condescension, dear lover?”

“I guess I did say I hate-”

“Correct!”

“-the headboard. Nothing but the headboard. Yesterday. While I’m half asleep. Baby.”

“Oh, pish posh, I hate it too! In fact, I’m doing us both a favor disposing of the entire thing altogether.”

“God, however can I thank you? I mean, you did rid us of our bed where we sleep on.”

“You can thank me by taking off those horrid gears faster and come here,” with that, Draco crawls back to where he was sitting before.

“You love these gears,” Harry says, hanging his harnesses and tool belt in the closet and walking into the bathroom for a quick shower, “you love them against your ba-”

“Put a lock on that filthy mouth, Potter, what will the Daily Prophet think?” Draco’s yell almost drowns out the shower spray. Harry laughs, his stomach hurting for the right reason at last.

When he re-enters the bedroom, Draco is leaning out from the tent thing.

“Come, get in, get in,” he beckons with a hasty wave.

Harry points to his wet hair with the hand holding his towel. Draco clicks his tongue and waves his hand more aggressively.

His husband’s level of theatrics is directly proportional to how slow Harry is at doing what he says, so he nods, fondness overflowing, and obeys.

“What’s all this?” He crouches and crawls in, eyeing the collection of pillows and quilts surrounding Draco and what would be Harry’s seat. It seems that he had also lugged in the chairs from their dining room to provide some structural support for the tent.

“A blanket fort, lover,” Draco says, his gaze tender. Harry’s finger tips tingle with every touch of cotton, linen, silk, as he gets situated. It’s been years and years and years and years, and Harry can never get used to, can never take for granted, the weight of his husband’s undivided attention.

“Huh,” he says, sitting down with an ‘oof’, “isn’t this for kids?”

“A blanket fort is a blanket fort,” Draco takes the towel from Harry’s arm and puts the throw pillow Ron knitted in his lap. He hits a button on the laptop in front of them, and Harry’s favorite jazz collection plays. He blinks. He thought Draco would play his questionable atmospheric-white-noise-POV-you’re-having-tea-in-a-gothic-vampire-library playlist, the weirdo.

Velvety smooth sax flows through the air. Harry exhales, easy and content, and lets Draco tilt his head. He towels Harry’s hair, massaging unhurried circles on his scalp and varying the degree of pressure. In no time, his head lolls forward, eyes closed, chin a breath away from his well-worn shirt. A slender, pale hand cups his cheek and holds his head up and steady. Meanwhile, the hand’s owner leans out of the blanket fort to get something.

“Ow.” A grunt. Harry smiles; most likely a cramp from all the leaning.

Then, his husband reseats himself, this time with a smell. A mouth-watering, delicious smell, tickling the back of Harry’s nose. He opens his eyes to see Draco lifting off the lid of a ceramic bowl perched on a tray, steam floating out and fogging Harry’s glasses. It’s purple yam soup, topped with chopped up shrimp and ground beef.

“Your usual order from the Viet place nearby whenever Pepper-up isn’t sufficient,” Draco murmurs, placing a spoon in Harry’s hand, his words warm against Harry’s temple. Huh, he didn’t think Draco would notice. “You said today you’d deal with those disgusting booby traps you showed me, thus I reckoned I should put the yams on our counter into good use.”

Harry stares at the soup, stunned. Draco must have taken his expression as something else.

“Oh, right,” he says, “I heated it up on the stove, but you were taking atrociously long so I casted a Heating charm. Let me take it off, okay?”

Draco flicks his hawthorn wand, a hand squeezing Harry’s shoulder as if he could see the prickling running up Harry’s nape.

He turns to look at his husband. When Harry’s career was starting to take its toll on his magical core, Draco didn’t hesitate to dive headfirst into Muggle living. Easier said than done, and it took months for him to stop frowning at the “absolutely bizarre, Potter, bizarre” appliances, but he got there in the end. Despite his constant bitching about everything, Draco not once raised a word about the drastic switch, effortlessly guiding Narcissa to gossip about the Albescu clan’s abhorrent matriarch when she asks about how he’s faring.

“Gosh, I,” Harry says. Mumbles, really, into Draco’s collarbone, filling his brain with the woodsy aroma of potion making that no amount of expensive body products can mask, “that’s lovely, baby, thank you.”

“Eat,” Draco says, rubbing his chin on the top of Harry still-damp hair and messaging his tense neck. Harry knows he’s breathing him in too. “Or I’ll have to heat it up in the kitchen again, and forgive me but I’d rather stay here for the next 12 hours, at least.”

“Lazy arse.”

Draco laughs, a momentary rumble of his chest, then moves forward to click something on the laptop. Harry’s on his fifth spoonful of pure comfort when the jazz music stops, and on the blank wall opposite from their blanket fort is the title card of a movie. Strange, Harry didn’t even notice the mini projector. He squints.

“Why is there Korean subtitles?”

“Lover,” Draco tosses a napkin at Harry’s crossed legs, “what is watching movies online without the occasional bout of piracy?”

“Pira- piracy,” Harry chokes, the hot soup stinging his palate, “we have a Netflix subscription.”

“You can’t find shite like this on Netflix.”

“Of course we can. Baby, we don’t know anyone who’s good at computer stuff and can deal with the viruses.”

“There’s no virus here, I checked.”

“How,” Harry stresses, “and again, piracy.”

“Sometimes,” Draco says, lowering the speaker volume, “not doing crimes… is worse.”

“What the fuck,” the main character, a square-faced woman with a python around her neck, has a monologue in a completely different language. “What the fuck? Is that Italian?”

“Yes, but I’m French.”

“And?”

“And they’re both Romance languages. I can understand certain words and translate it for you.”

No, he can’t.

“Why are you looking at me like that? Keep eating,” Draco settles amid the pillows, long hair settled on his satin-clad chest, white against emerald. Harry sneers at him - an unfortunate habit he’s gotten from Draco - and turns to watch the movie.

True to his words, Draco translates every dialogue and mimics the characters’ voices with zeal, contradicting his stoic expression and somber, interlaced hands, looking like a cranky judge having to deal with reckless teenagers on their anti-authority phase. Harry can tell that he doesn’t understand a thing, and soon enough he’s woven a story about how the thriller-mystery they’re watching is actually a vicious custody battle over a duck. For each of Harry’s occasional snicker at the absurdity Draco has thought up is a playful kick at his ribs.

Minutes pass. With Harry’s bowl now emptied, he puts it on a chair and goes to wash up. 

The moment he sits back down, Draco’s big toe pokes at his spine. Getting the memo, Harry grins and reclines on the pillows. His left side is flushed against Draco’s right, the kinks in his neck eased off from the angle. They, as per usual, gradually get closer to one another, and at some point, Draco lays his head on Harry’s chest and ear on his beating heart. It’s calming to him, Draco had said when Harry asked, on the third night of their honeymoon. With the war long behind them, there was nothing to fear. Only the constellations existed as their witnesses.

“You died, Harry,” he had whispered, full and tipsy. “It was the worst thing I’ve ever seen, despite all the shite I made you go through.

“You were so far away in Hagrid’s arms, I couldn’t see your face,” the night had been blinding, but his eyes had found Draco’s anyway. “It felt like my heart died with you.”

Harry had kissed his forehead and hugged him close. His heart had always been there for Draco to take.

“What’s up with the blanket fort?”

He has a lapful of Draco, a lungful of peach and cedar scented shampoo, and the sleepy timbre of his husband’s voice against his chest. The Italian movie is the last thing on Harry’s mind. 

“I wasn’t aware of its existence growing up,” Draco says. “Having anything other than an immaculate bed when one wasn’t sleeping was uncouth, see, so you could imagine my surprise when Teddy demanded to play in something as messy as a fort so often.”

Harry doesn’t need to imagine it; he had witnessed it himself. Draco, freshly released from a two-year sentence in Azkaban, mellowed and tentative, yet determined to reconnect with his mother’s sister and his nephew. Harry had been wary too, standing in the corner of Teddy’s bedroom, staring at the fuzz of blonde on Draco’s shorn head and his weak gait. Teddy, the darling boy with his clumsy hold on Draco’s thigh, afraid that the haggard man would trip without help, had led him to his play area.

“Fort, fort,” the boy had screamed in Draco’s ear, but he hadn’t flinched. He had nodded and gone along with Teddy’s babbled directions, then sat back on his heels and fixed a wide-eyed stare at the monstrosity Teddy had called a fort (his designing skills were, unsurprisingly, underdeveloped at the mere age of two). 

Swiveling his head, he had gawked at Harry, who had still been standing in the corner with his arms crossed, confusion and hysteria in the arch of his aristocratic brows.

It had been the first time he had looked at Harry in the eye for years. In seconds, it was 6th Year all over again, with him watching Draco pushing his food around with a fork from across the room, unable to look away. Obsession, a voice unlike Hermione’s helpfully defined, had slithered up and under his skin. It had remained there for years, stubborn and ardent, an emotion he had tried to leave behind time and time again. He’d never succeeded.

It’s Draco, after all.

“He never let anyone but him enter the fort, remember? Back when he’s still making us build it for him?” Draco’s fingers tap a random rhythm on Harry’s stomach. Harry tightens his arm around him, shifts a bit. “So many forts and I still didn’t know what it’s like to be in one.”

Somebody downs a shot in the movie. Harry doesn’t quite register it. “I don’t think I’ve ever been in a proper one either until now. Didn’t have enough space in the cupboard. Plus, the hanging around the beds at Hogwarts felt pretty cozy by themselves.”

Draco hums. “Mhmm, I say. Another ‘first’ for us.”

Harry glances at the crown of his head. The man doesn’t sound surprised; Harry wagers that he already knows and decided to make one for the both of them today.

They continue to watch the movie in silence, whites and blues and purples flooding his sight, until Draco yawns and Harry blinks his eyes shut for far too long.

“Baby.”

“Hmm?”

“Sleep?”

“Yes.”

“Where, then? We have no bed.”

“I still maintain that I made the right choice”

“Jesus Christ, you’re so rash for an academic.”

“Well, in my professional opinion, sleeping in a blanket fort every blue moon does wonders for one’s quality of sleep,” Draco gets up on his elbow to smirk at Harry, “we can look at other beds tomorrow, can’t we? Now hush. Rest.”

“Ha,” Harry says, at least 5 more words to follow up on that just on the tip of his tongue. But then Draco runs a gentle hand through Harry’s hair, taking his time with it, the remaining hints of Harry’s migraine from work fading with every curl of hair carefully unknotted. He mumbles this and that, silly, insignificant things, engrossed in his task, and Harry listens carefully as his eyelids lower.

Draco takes off his gold-rimmed glasses (so sweet and soft Harry can barely feel it), cleans them and puts them on a chair. Through half-lidded eyes, Harry watches him cover them both with a quilt and return to Harry’s chest, curling up like a cat. Draco’s arm is around his midriff, peach and cedar pervading his senses anew, and Harry forgets whatever he was going to say.

Cold ankles pressed against bare calves, Harry is already deep asleep when the credits roll.

[experiencenaturetoday]

1. Plastic food containers, plastic water bottles, plastic wrap

This was a top thing that my friend said she changed, plastic containers! Many plastic containers are made from chemicals such as phthalates, which can interfere with the body’s endocrine system to produce adverse developmental, reproductive and neurological effects in humans and since the plastic breaks down over time it can cause the release of these dangerous chemicals into your food. Good reason for me to switch to glass. Which I did over the summer after a friend told me that information on plastic containers. I have been using THESE Beeswax Food Wraps on my glass containers and bowls. I changed in the summer to all glass (THESE glass containers. I use THESE for snacks for kids. And THESE bags replaced all our plastic bags). And I like to use THESE reusable cups and sippy cups rather than plastic.

2. Nonstick pans

Another friend who had breast cancer (in remission thankfully) told me the first thing she changed was all the pans she cooks with! Non-stick pans are the most popular cookware and also the most controversial. According to the Environmental Working Group, nonstick coatings can “reach 700 degrees Fahrenheit in as little as 3-5 minutes, releasing 15 toxic gases and chemicals, including two carcinogens.” There are non-stick pans that ARE non-toxic you just have to do your research. I found that a Cast Iron pan to be the most “green or non-toxic” we have THIS Cast Iron Pan, just read into how to properly take care of them! I am looking at getting THIS set of green pans, still doing my research.  

3. Air fresheners

Like cleaning products, air fresheners help keep our homes nice, but a study by the University of California at Berkeley found that when used excessively or in unventilated area they release toxic levels of pollutants. If you use them make sure the room is well ventilated. We actually make our own! You can get the recipe HERE- DIY Room Spray.

4. Perfumes and Candles

A quick google search and I found this- Environmental Protection Agency found that potentially hazardous chemicals can commonly be found in fragrances. Causing some major side affects. Look for natural alternatives. And most candles are made of paraffin wax, which creates highly toxic benzene and toluene when burned. In fact, the toxins released from paraffin candles are the same as those found in diesel fuel fumes. YIKES!! So look for candles made from vegetable (soy) wax. And a lead-free wick. And no fragrance. I am big into oils now and don’t use candles, except for battery operated. I am a big diffuser lover!! You can read more about that HERE.

5. Fabric softeners

Softeners work by coating your clothes with a thin layer of potentially toxic chemicals, such as quantenary ammonium salts. These can cause skin irritation, respiratory problems and headaches. This information is so new to me! I have been using THESE Wool Dryer Balls for about a month and have been completely happy with the results. They come with essential oils to make your clothes smell nice! A reader told me that you can use white vinegar in the Laundry room as a natural fabric softener. … A half-cup of white vinegar when added to the final rinse, on the other hand, will soften fabrics and leave no residue at all.

6. Cleaning products

This one seems obvious. I only use vinegar and water at our home or make sure that is is non-toxic before I buy it. I also use Thieves concentrate. I LOVE that new addition to my home. Anti- bacterial too! You can see more of the cleaning products I use HERE.

7. Flame Retardants

I met a woman at a play place and we started talking. She told me what she did and what she was interested in. She had recently written an article about toxic things in our home. I asked her what the the number one thing was and she said flame retardants in your mattress or mattress pad (remember when they made flame-retardant pajamas, my grandma insisted Ella wear them!) Flame retardants use polybrominated diphenyl ethers, or PBDEsfor short. Two forms of PBDEs were phased out of use in manufacturing in the United States in 2004 because of related health threats, but the products containing them linger on. Studies have linked PBDEs to learning and memory problems and other health issues. Good idea to check your mattress label! And check before you purchase a mattress cover. I found a non-toxic mattress protector when Finn switched to his big-boy bed.

8. Shower Curtain

Phthalates are sometimes used to soften the plastic that goes in shower curtains. Phthalates has been associated with causing harmful effects in children. Opt for a shower curtain that is phthalate-free. I use THIS cloth fabric liner that is non-toxic and I wash it every two weeks.

9. Bug sprays

Bug killers should be avoided inside (and ideally outside) of your house, as researchers have linked the insecticides to neurological damage in children. Scary!! For outdoors I try to just use citronella in a diffuser, non-toxic and free of D.E.E.T or petroleum. I also make my own bug-off spray!

10. Antiperspirants

One of the ingredients found in a lot of deodorants is aluminum. Food and Drug Administration does require a warning label on all antiperspirants. Questions have been raised about aluminum in deodorants if they contribute to breast cancer (studies are in-conclusive). But that is enough of a reason for me to look for all natural deodorant. THIS deodorant it works well for my Crossfit workouts and it smells good! Kevin uses it too!!

11. Sunscreens with Oxybenzone

I would avoid these ingredients after searching online- oxybenzone, avobenzone, octisalate, octocrylene, homosalate and octinoxateI. Similar toxins in fragrances. I have used THIS sunscreen for my kids for awhile.

12. Wi-Fi Routers

Wireless routers give off electromagnetic radiation in the low frequency. You probably can’t get away from the effects of Wi-Fi (I know I can’t!) You could disconnect your wi-fi router it at night. Which is a little out of the way for me. I was talking to a woman who was diagnosed with breast cancer (thankfully went into remission). She said that she like to use a Himalayan Salt Lamp when she has her Wi-Fi on to “clean the air”. It might be a stretch, but I found this – “Combined with a light source inside the lamps, the chunks of salt produce negative ions, which yield positive effects on indoor air. Placing a Himalayan salt lamp in every room of the home can reap several health and environmental benefits. Among other things, they can: Balance Electromagnetic Radiation.” Who knows if they work, but I like the way the way they look. So I ordered one for the girls room. If anything it is a nice soft lamp for them at night. My friend did a lot of research and said that THIS Himalayan Salt Lamp. Again DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH. This is just what I do. You can also find a router blanket, type cover.

[mermaid-of-the-valley]

Don’t Be Afraid (Pre-Paternal Moxiety)

Backstory to my Superhero AU. How Patton and Virgil met.

He was hiding, in his mother’s old room. It was hardly the safest spot, but in his distress, it was the only place he could think of. Now his sister was stomping around the house looking for him. He hadn’t meant to use his powers. They just-

“Get out here, you little freak! When I tell you not to play around like that you listen!”

Happened.

“I know I raised you better than that! Would it kill you to be normal for five minutes!”

He covered his ears. There was nothing wrong with him… right?

“You selfish brat!” A bang startled a yelp from him and everything went quiet. Moments later the noise redoubled at the door. “I know you’re in there, and if you don’t come out now, I’ll report you to the Collectors! Don’t pretend it wouldn’t do me any favors!”

He retreated further, sealing himself in the closet. It smelled like perfume and moth balls. They’d seen him playing with his shadow, the people his sister had wanted to take him in, and they’d run out convinced that he was possessed.

Maybe he was. It would certainly explain some things.

She gave him to the count of three. The blood rushed in his ears.

Then he heard her paper puppet slip under the door. The lock clicked open and he heard her come in.

His heartrate shot up; this was it. She’d never forgive him for this one. The knob turned.

A draft of air hit his face as he looked up. There, standing like an avenging angel with a papyrus body guard, was his sister. With the light at her back he couldn’t make out her expression. She must have said something, but for the life of him he couldn’t hear it over the sound of his own breaths.

The puppet reached for him.

He screamed.

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Logan had just started rinsing the shampoo from his hair when an obnoxious series of tones railed through his bedroom. He stumbled in a sudsy mess over the tub’s rim, barely avoiding the door frame as he grabbed the beeping device before it could alert his roommates. He spent several precious seconds squinting at the screen before he realized he’d left his glasses by the sink.

Once that, completely reasonable and not at all embarrassing, scene was handled, Logan read the digital scroll.  A set of coordinates, the request for assistance from all available heroes, and the presumed hazard level of the emergency in question. That was perhaps the most alarming aspect. The level was somewhere among 6 to 7. The former due to the need for evacuation and the latter due to the phenomenon steadily expanding. The actual casualties were, as of yet, unknown.

Logan allowed himself the very short mercy of a quick spray from the shower to disperse the rest of the soap. There was no time to waste! He was half way from his bedroom door before he realized.

…Clothes, he still needed clothes. Newton, he hated working without coffee.

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Meanwhile, across town, Patton was awake and working. He’d actually been up since 4:30 to catch the morning rush at the bakery. The tiny tv in kitchen was buzzing with the sounds of gossip and talk shows when he heard the breaking news screech.

“All residents of the Bellmara area are ordered to evacuate immediately. An incident of potentially villainous inception is developing in the lower sector and expanding at a fixed rate. Citizens are to remain away while the appropriate response is mounted. More information to be determined.”

The message continued to repeat with obnoxious alerts breaking in intermittently to draw attention. The other bakers and decorators whispered in concern. Patton wiped some flour from his hands and surreptitiously glanced down at his watch. The digital numbers remained as they had always been, no shift or sign of detail.

Patton frowned. This seemed like a big deal, shouldn’t they be calling in everyone?

“Oh! Guys, guys look!” Patton’s eyes snapped back up as a coworker with a rainbow frosting bag waved for their attention.

The screen switched to an aerial view. Several houses on a street were engulfed or being engulfed by a cloud of black mist. Thin wisps swirled and swiped around an epicenter that could not be determined, and even from the grainy footage, Patton could see that the radius was ever so slowly expanding outwards.

“Authorities have determined the emergency is power based!” Shouted the on-site reporter over the whirring of her chopper. “Efforts to breach have apparently been met with unusual resistance, but no injuries have been verified!” The scene spun around the phenomena. “There are no gaps that we can see, bu-“

A tendril of smoke made a wide arc near them and the helicopter was forced back, disrupting their words as the reporter and cameraman braced themselves in the cabin.

One more look down at his wrist. Nothing. Okay, this was ridiculous! He couldn’t just wait around for a summons when people were in trouble. With another glance at his coworkers, Patton slipped out the back door.

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Logos was staring up at the tempest when a pastel colored hero rode up on a motorcycle with an equally baffling color scheme. The figure swung of the bike and popped off his helmet, revealing his domino masked face and curly blond hair.

He gave the technopath a grin and a wave. “Hiya! Logos, right?” He held out his hand.

Logos reacted without thinking, shaking his colleague’s hand. “Um, yes. Good to meet you…” He took notice of the large P pasted to the front of the uniform. “Patriarch?” Why call in an empath?

“Oh, I actually pronounce it Pat-triarch!” He corrected with a giggle, like he was sharing a private joke with himself.

“So, with a French lean? I will endeavor to remember your preferred pronunciation.” He realized they were still holding hands and jerked away. “My apologies.”

“No worries, Kiddo.” Logos played with something on his suit cuff. “Have you figured out how to get in there?”

Logos frowned. “Well, therein lies the problem.” He approached a thinker wall of the mist and reached in.

Patriarch watched curiously as an exact copy of Logos hand reached out above his own and pushed the hero away, retracting back at the same time he did. “The thin parts of the barrier are imperfect lashes that push away and the thicker parts create perfect reflections with the same effect. I have been attempting to calibrate a device that the matter will not perceive to see the inside.” He picked up a piece of gravel and tossed it unimpeded through the wall. “Inorganic matter does not evoke a reaction.”

Patriarch hovered over his shoulder to see the technopath making gestures over his cuff, like flipping the pages of a book or adding pieces of something only he could see. Finally, he presses down on the outline of disk and sections of the metal spring up into the shape of a sp-

“Spider!” Logos jerked his head towards the exclamation finding Patriarch decidedly further away.

“What?” He shifted his gaze between the little robot and the cowering man. “Fear not. I assure you that while my device might appear arachnidan in nature it is not in fact-”

“Please! Please just- I am terribly afraid of those little…” He made a shooing motion at the probe. “Monsters. And I would much rather stand way over here.”

“I- very well.” Logos shuffled as close the wall as he could before directing the probe down his hand and into the barrier. He then showed the other hero his empty fingers and was allowed to move next to him. The technopath drew up a small screen for Patriarch to see what he could through his A.I.’s lens. At first it was nothing but blackness, but soon thin spots of color began to peek in between the thick clouds. Logos directed the probe forward with a thought.

The thin patches became more and more noticeable the further the bug went until the shape of a home could be discerned. “Whatever this vapor is, it is not capable of filling space without dispersing to an extent. I suspect the phenomena is only capable of defending itself at the outermost edges.”

A pulse emanated from the structure, stirring the vapor at the windows and reverberating out. They watched as it flew past the probe and saw moments later when it hit the barrier from the inside, pushing it several near imperceptible inches forward. Patriarch hissed beside him. His hands folded over his chest.

“Oh. Logos, I think someone’s in there.” His blinked rapidly, wetness present in his eyes. “They’re so scared.”

Logos flicked a finger and the camera’s vision became highlighted with thermal colors. Sure enough, in one of the upper level rooms was a white and red splotch, pacing. “It appears we have found our source, though what motive they might have for subsuming a neighborhood I do not know.” He turned to his companion, but instead found him marching intently towards the barrier. “Patriarch?”

“You said it doesn’t react to inorganic stuff, right?” He asked, slipping off a glove and flapping it through the mist a few times to test.

“Yes, but,” He waved up and down the empath. “You ARE organic.”

“Yeah, but whoever is in there needs help and your little robot can’t talk to them. I want to see if I can trick the lock.”

“How?”

“I’m going to shield the emotions and energy I give off and see if I can stretch the definition of inorganic.” He pressed the sides of his domino and the mask stretched to cover his face and hair down to the neck. When every inch of skin was covered, Patriarch focused. If one looked close enough, they might see the air around the hero heat rapidly and then go flat.

He reached out to the wall, only the material of his suit being perceived, and pressed in. No copy sprang forth to defend the perimeter. A foot edged forward, no response. Patriarch inhaled and slipped right through the mist.

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Inside it was just like the footage. Waves of shadow floating in odd, uncontrolled directions, but nowhere near as firmly as the outside. He took a few more steps forward and released a breath. He started forward, carefully feeling his way along the roadway and cautiously stepping onto the curb.

The spaces between became more pronounced. He squinted through the lenses of his mask at a label on the house’s mailbox. ‘Shae’. Not much to go on, but it was a start. He moved on up what he assumed to be the driveway and then the walkway to the front stoop. He decided to test his theory there, opening himself up the interference of the dome and its occupant. His mask peeled back to its original position. Still no reaction, but now the air was palpable with a myriad of negative emotions.

Grief. Fear. Sadness. Regret. All of these came at him in waves. Patriarch tried the doorknob. Unsurprisingly locked like the vapor, but not very easily jimmied.

Something crawled over his boot.

Patton kicked out with a yelp and the thing hit the door hard. He watched with horror as Logos’ little spider-bot flailed on its back with its limbs wriggling. After a couple seconds the joints stilled abruptly, rotating to stand in a new manner with the camera tilting up. The lens ‘blinked’.

“…Sorry?” The empath squeaked. The machine ambled to the side of the porch and crawled up a small rock. It tapped in a circle on the top of the stone and then scampered off. Tipping it revealed a plastic hatch.

Patton retrieved the key from its hiding place and then bashfully thanked the air around him in case Logos tiny friend happened to be nearby. The door was unlocked, and he stepped inside.

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The emotions were far more present in the house along with the scent of mildew and… paper? He called out as loudly as he dared. “Hello?”

Terror. A wave of it pouring from the staircase. Patton couldn’t tell whether it was because of him or not though. It shifted the smoke still inside the foyer and lightly rattled the wood of the door behind him. Distress. Grief. Sadness. He followed the negative feelings up the stairs.

They emanated most strongly from a room at the top of the steps. The door was cracked and hanging open by a single intact hinge like it had been blown back in the wrong direction by the force behind it. Patton winced at the sound of sobbing. He got as close to the frame as he dared before peering in.

A kid, probably barely a teen, was curled in on himself. He was gasping and crying over every breath. He would sometimes seem to gain some calm only to pitch forward with renewed horror spilling out.

That was the only way Patton could think to describe it later as thick black vapor would spill from the boy’s mouth with each wave of panic.

The room was in great disarray, objects scattered against the walls, scraps of fabric and paper strewn about the floor and- a mass encased in front of the boy. The empath swallowed hard against the lump in his throat.

After a moment’s consideration, he knocked on the door frame. No change. The teen was still spiraling, powers and emotions flapping around like the disjointed mess in the room. Patton went in, approaching slowly and knelt down next to him.

“Hey.” A slight hitch in the breaths. “It’ll be okay. You don’t need to be scared.” A sob. “I’m Patriarch.” He introduced. Shivers from the other party. “Easy, just try to breathe.” A heavy exhale. “Good, that’s good.”

Patton bit his lip, not completely sure how to proceed. “I’m- I’m going to count for you. Okay, Kiddo? Can you try to match me?”

Some confusion mixed with hesitance. His eyes jerked towards Patton for the first time, like he was trying to understand how the hero had gotten so close. “It’s okay,” He held up his hands. “I’m not going to hurt you, I promise.” He took a slow, deliberate breath. “Can you try to breathe with me? One… Two… Three… Four…”

There were some false starts before they managed to follow the pattern. The cries became less stilted and more firm. “That’s great, Kiddo. You’re doing really well.”

“Wh-who’re you?” He jolted back a few inches in jerky movements.

“Patriarch.” He repeated, unbothered. “I’m a superhero, Kiddo. I got worried that someone in here needed help.”

“M’not a kid.”

Patton smiled gently. “Aww, that’s just what I call everyone. I’m a Dad at heart. What would you prefer?”

“…Virgil.” He mumbled for the first time without the smoke. His eyes caught on the mass in front of him and his expression twisted in on itself. Looking around didn’t help the situation, and Patton rushed to prevent the new influx of grief from impacting them.

“Virgil, look at me. I need you to stay calm.”

A strangled whimper slipped out. “I’m sorry. I don’t- I didn’t mean to-” A puff of vapor that Virgil fought to hide with his hands. “I can’t make it stop! She was so mad, I just wanted her to leave me alone!”

Patton tapped his hand lightly to regain his attention. “Virgil, I’m an Empath. I can tell where this is coming from. If you want me to, I can help you control this and then we’ll help her.” That last part was iffy, but they couldn’t do anything if Virgil kept panicking.

Virgil made hard eye contact with him, no doubt weighing his concerns with Patton’s promises. Another flicker of fear jumped across the air and, with the same force of will he’d shown in hiding his power’s expression, he shoved it back. “Fine, fine! Just do it! Whatever it is!”

Patton made all of his movements slowly, giving the kid time to opt out. His fingertips settled against Virgil’s temples.

Scared. Regret. Bad.

The feelings flew forward immediately, much clearer now. Patton could trace how they affected his powers, pushing and crashing like an ocean storm. It explained how they were slipping out of control. He asked Virgil to focus on his breathing once more, and directed a series of calm waves at the turbulent source. It thundered in response, equally reactive to the diminishing negativity and Patton’s efforts.

Even so, it was growing dormant. The mist still hovering in the room coalesced together and started fizzling away. The darkest shadow beside them crumbled like dust.

Inside was a black-haired woman wrapped up in paper, ripped at the edges and stained with signs of struggle against the dark matter. The barrier fell around her.

She was still breathing, thank goodness. His relief echoed back at him. Glancing up, he could see Virgil was crying.

A bang rattled the house as the front door burst open. Patton bit back a curse at the reflexive power surge that was startled out of Virgil, reassuring him with nonsense platitudes and soothing pulses. “I got you, kidd- Virgil… Sorry. It’s probably just the med team for her.”

Bootsteps on the stairs, closer, closer. Patton turned, desperate not to disappoint the younger super. Logos stood in the doorway, a stark contrast to the riot gear covered police behind him.

Patton squeezed Virgil’s shoulder and grinned up at the technopath. “Hey, Logos! Great timing, we need some paramedics up here for…” He trailed off, realizing he didn’t yet know the girl’s name and eyed Virgil for help.

“Lavinia, but she prefers Vinnie.” He mumbled, darting his gaze back to his sister.

Patton leapt back in, keeping his tone as light as possible. “Right. Well, you heard me! Go get some help for Vinnie. Please.”

Logos reiterated the instructions much more forcefully and the officers behind him split, one half going back down stairs and the other half following him into the room. Logos personally approached Lavinia and maneuvered her into a recovery position. The lack of reaction from her incited another sob from Virgil. “Please keep calm. It is not uncommon for injuries sustained to prevent immediate response and she seems to be stable.”

Patton could have hugged the man for his unflappable demeanor. Virgil’s emotions deescalated with his assurances in a way Patton wouldn’t have expected from the dark boy. It must have been the certainty Logos spoke with, it definitely put Patton more at ease.

The EMTs arrived in short succession and took over for the supers. Lavinia was rolled onto the backboard and lifted away. Scraps of paper floated after them on an invisible breeze and Virgil’s whole posture loosened at the display. “I- I almost. She almost-”

Logos put a hand on his opposite shoulder, urging him to stand. “You don’t have to explain yet. There will be time enough for that later.” It was slow going out of the home. Not least of which because of Virgil’s apprehension and the police herding them outside.

Virgil barely stepped over the threshold when everything went to hell. City officials and paparazzi pressed into the flimsy caution tape to get a better look, flashes and sirens disorienting him. He was brought suddenly to the ground. A hand grabbed the back of his neck. Something pricked his skin. There was a rush of cold and then everything turned fuzzy.

Patton should have known that the cops were being too docile, but Virgil’s emotions were so much more intense than the surface level calm being projected. He was shoved from the kid before his foot left the porch and Logos had only seconds before the same happened to him. The empath caught himself on the walk and spun back to see Virgil roughly restrained on his stomach, head jerked to side and a needle being pushed into his skin.

“What are you doing?! Get off of him!” It was Logos, surprisingly, whom screamed first, rushing at the team he’d lead only moments earlier. More officers blocked him. “He wasn’t a threat anymore; you have no right! Get away!” The older heroes could only watch in horror as Virgil’s hair was released and his head dropped forward without support. “What was that?!”

The man holding Virgil’s arms finally responded. “A sedative. You saw what this punk was capable of. He’s going into lock up.”

“He’s a child. He didn’t intend any of this. The last thing he needs is to be treated like a criminal!” Patton interjected.

“Patriarch!”

Patton whipped around at the call. For a moment he was relieved. “Commissioner Sanders.”

A man in a truly horrible church suit stood by the ambulance Lavinia was being loaded in. He looked like he was trying to be stern. Patton felt less relieved. Thomas huffed a breath through his nose. “Come on, guys. See this from my point of view.”

“Wha- But!” Virgil was wrapped up in a restraint vest and hefted past them. “Hey! Wait! Commissioner you can’t just- I mean, he’s not! Gosh, words are hard!”

Logos jumped in. “What he’s trying to say is, we don’t think locking him up is the best decision. In fact, it would most likely only exacerbate what allowed his powers to spiral out of control. Surely you can understand that!”

The man watched the heroes closely and then switched to Virgil as he was loaded into the back of the police van. The boy slumped limply where he was placed, eyes glazed with the drug in his system. He didn’t look like a threat now, but that could change on a dime. There was a reason he was called to the scene after all. Thomas closed the door and knocked against the back of the van.

He tried not to flinch at Logan and Patton’s betrayed expressions. He sighed as the van pulled away. “Let’s talk.”

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His wrists hurt. Why was that? There were bracelets on them. Too tight. Why? Everything was so sloppy.

“Virge?”

Who?

“Come on, V. Push past it. We need to talk about some stuff.”

Someone had his hands. Did they put on the bracelets? No, wait that was…? He looked different than before. Where was his mask? “P-” He tried.

“Easy. I got you. Can you hear me? Understand me?”

He wasn’t quite sure if he nodded or just jerked his head from where it was falling.

“Can you move your fingers? Give me a squeeze if you understand.” He managed that much. “M’kay. Wearing off then. Virgil, I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

What happened? He didn’t fight, so why was he…? Eyes slid around the room. One of those cells with a mirror on the wall, like on Lavinia’s crime dramas.

“We talked it over with the commissioner. He’s willing to give you a shot, but we have to establish a few things first.”

This was an interrogation room. That should scare him. Why wasn’t he scared? Was it the bracelets? Patriarch? He didn’t seem the type, but then why was he here? Where was his sister? Was she okay?

“La-Lvini?” He choked.

“She’s still resting at the hospital, Virgil.”

Virgil surprised them both with how fast he pulled his right wrist free. “I need to see her!” A surge of something shot through him, but he was left suddenly winded as the force was stifled. It crumpled into a ball, putting pressure on his head until he curled over the table. Patriarch squeezed his other hand in sympathy.

“I’m sorry, Virge.” He repeated.

Virgil cringed. “What was that?”

“Backlash. Virgil, you have a profound amount of power, but what happened at your house made everyone nervous.” He pointed at the manacles. “These put a cap on how much you can do. I felt you panic, so I guess your power reacted past the limit.”

Virgil’s eyes bubbled with regret. “I didn’t mean to.”

“I know.” They sat in silence waiting for the teen to regain control of his emotions. “Commissioner Sanders does too. But you didn’t see what we did. The way your powers reacted was bizarre and uncontrolled. Which means, people are scared.”

“Am I going to jail?”

“I don’t want you to. Logos and I think you could be great if you get ahold of those abilities, but you’d need to keep those on until we’re sure you do.”

“Can I stay at my house if I practice?”

“It’s not the easiest thing to figure out on your own. Plus, you’re still a minor. As long as Lavinia is in the hospital, you shouldn’t be alone.”

Virgil’s face scrunched. “How long is she going to be there?” Patton flicked his eyes around, debating with himself.

“I’m not sure, Virgil. She’s stable, just not very responsive.” He sighed. “Even when she wakes up, she’ll need to recuperate for a while. Do you have any other family at all that can take you in? Or any friends with powers?”

“…No. ‘Cause I’m wrong and scary. I only hang out with my own shadow.”

“You sound like you’ve heard that a lot.” Virgil looked away. “You could, I mean if you wanted to, I might be able to-”

Patriarch fumbled uselessly at the air like the perfect words would appear to him. Virgil frowned. “What?”

“Um, I could help? Teach you, I mean! Feelings are my thing, I’m sure I can handle that much.”

“Handle?”

“Mentor! I can mentor you in how to regulate your feelings and how they affect your abilities. You can even stay with me if you want!”

Virgil had gone wide-eyed.

Oh, did he just say that? Yes. Yes, he had. Did he mean it? Patriarch opened his mouth, but nothing came out.

“I- You’re serious?”

“No, I’m Patton.” Oh. My. God. Why did he say that? “…Patton-ly heroic?” Smooth save.

A watery half-laugh slipped from his companion. “Nice try. I almost believed you for a minute there.”

“I still meant it!” And Patton was surprised to realize that it was true. He couldn’t live with himself if this kiddo ended up in the hoosegow when he could have done something about it. “I want to help you and if you need a place to stay in the process, then so be it.”

“If I say yes, can I get these things loosened? My fingers are going numb.” Virgil grumbled, flopping back in his chair and raising the bracelets with an air of apathy. Relief.

“No problem, Kiddo.” It may have been rocky, but at least it was a start.

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Backstory! Hope it was enjoyed. I’m going to pass out now.

[malmuses]

A Very Human Risk - Part 1 - Sam

Author’s Notes:

My very first fanfic, not to mention the first thing I’ve written in at least 10 years. Eek! This tumblr is really for myself, to prove that I can do it... but just in case anyone stumbles across it, here’s a quick Authors Note and summary.

There are 6 parts to this fic, from various character points of view, and an epilogue. (So technically 7 parts I suppose....) They are all already complete, but I plan on posting them separately over the next couple of weeks after proofing and editing. If anyone reads, I’d love a message or comment to say hi! I’ll likely post a more in-depth authors note when I’m done.

This fic is set during early to mid Season 13, shortly after Cas’s return from The Empty. 

Summary

Team Free Will’s thousand mile journey home from a routine hunt is going to take a little longer than planned. Sam’s patience with Dean and his Angel’s lack of true communication doesn’t last that far...

Destiel, Humor, Optional Smut. GO!

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

A Very Human Risk

Part One - Sam

Blood. Miscellaneous viscera. A small chunk of what might be intestine… more blood. Sam idly examined the stains on his pants while he waited for the lights to change. He was sat shotgun in the front of the Impala, ignoring the thump of his possibly-concussed head so that Dean could swing them through the drive-thru of a small mom-and-pop burger joint near Zebulon, North Carolina. Something clear and kinda greasy… was that spinal fluid? Some days, it was definitely better to pick a food option where they didn’t have to get out of the car. In the wide back seat, Cas shifted his weight forward and reached into the driver’s space. He seemed miraculously clean himself, but he had no qualms or squeamishness about the lump of something-or-other he flicked out of Deans sandy hair. There was a tiny plop as whatever-it-was landed on the dashboard.

“Hey, watch the tunes…” Dean grumbled mildly, pushing a slightly yellowed cassette of Styx songs away from the chunk.

Cas made no response, instead retreating to his often worn silent-but-listening expression and returning his gaze out of the window.

A few minutes later, Dean passed a large brown bag of warmth and questionable nutrition over to Sam, who settled it on his lap among the stains and began to rifle through as they made their way back to the highway. “They forgot a fork for my salad…” Sam lamented quietly.

“Guess you’ll have to eat it straight out of the bowl, like a true rabbit.” Dean offered with a slight grin. His words were teasing, but his tone was thin and tired. He shifted in his seat, wincing sorely at an assortment of minor wounds.

They had been on the road for several hours since they ganked a whole nest of vampires near the coast, trying to make sure they’d shaken a particularly curious traffic cop who pulled them on the way back from cleaning up the remains. He’d found no issue with the license of a certain Edward Halen, thank Chuck, but had seemed more than a little disturbed by the state of the car and its occupants. Dean had thought it best to ditch their plan to wash up in a nearby motel and stay on the road until they were well clear. Although filthy, beaten and in several cases bleeding, none of them were gravely wounded and they figured a good few hours of the road back home couldn’t hurt.

“You should rest soon.” It was a statement from Cas in the back. “Or at least shower…”

We must smell awful to him, Sam contemplated.

Dean opened his mouth to offer a quick retort, but after a couple of seconds he merely sighed and agreed. 

“Yeah. Let’s find somewhere with a room for tonight. It’s over a thousand miles back to Kansas, so we’re not getting back to the Bunker today anyways. Or at least a by-the-hour with a ton of hot water.” 

He paused briefly to check the traffic before swinging the car out onto the highway. “I’ll head towards Raleigh, there’s bound to be some kinda motel before we hit the city.”

Sam nodded idly, distracted by more pressing matters. “Dean, did you seriously order three cheeseburgers?”

“Yes.” His brother snapped, before rolling his eyes and relenting. “One’s for Cas, bitch.”

“Cas doesn’t eat, jerk.”

“Oh, but I can.” The speed with which Cas snatched the offending item from Sam’s hand was really unnecessary. Sam watched Dean’s eyes slide back to look at the angel as he unwrapped the greasy package, biting into the burger with a contented little sigh. His brother looked pleased with himself, a tiny smile curling his lip as their eyes caught and hovered for just a second too long, before Dean had to return his gaze to the tarmac. Sam said nothing; he’d been around these two long enough to know moments like that weren’t his to intrude on. The silence that followed though… that bugged him a lot more than it used to before.

* * *

Throwing the motel card to Dean, Sam ducked down into the driver’s seat of the Impala. 

“Go grab the first shower Dean, so we can get your injuries patched up…. Cas and I will run to that grocery store we passed and grab some beer and snacks for later.”

Without waiting for a response, Sam spun out of the Motel 8 parking lot. Looking over his shoulder he caught Cas’s slightly confused expression, but the angel said nothing and remained in place on the back seat, almost eerily immobile as the Impala lurched over the uneven gravel. It took only a couple of minutes to get to the Food Lion parking lot. As the car settled, Sam took the key and slipped it into his pocket, but didn’t immediately move.

“Perhaps I should fetch the beer, Sam.” Cas rumbled mildly. “For once, I may draw less attention.” He gestured to Sam’s splattered clothing.

“Yeah, I really took the brunt of the spray when Dean hacked that brunette.”

The door creaked as Cas began to open it.

“Cas?”

“Yes, Sam?”

Sam took a moment, before turning his giant form in the seat so he could look at the angelic face in the back, who still had one hand on the door handle. “Do you love my brother, Cas?”

A ghost of something shot across Castiel’s brilliant blue eyes before he responded. “Of course, Sam. You’re both family to me.”

Sam chuckled slightly, but it was a sad sound. 

“Of course.” Despite his tone, his smile to the angel was genuinely fond.  “But… I watched Dean grieve for you when you were in the Empty, Cas. I’ve seen him grieve plenty over the years…Grief for family. Dad. Mom. Bobby… For friends, for Charlie, Kevin, Ellen and Jo…. We thought you were really gone, Cas. Christ, I missed you too. It was awful. But Dean…. I’ve never seen him grieve like that Cas. He lost himself.”

The silence in the trench coat loomed for several moments.

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that, Sam.” His voice a soft, frustrated growl. “It was a stupid move on my part… I was reckless and you paid for that.”

“You made a snap decision Cas, we’ve all done worse,” Sam comforts. “But that’s not my point.”

Castiel’s gaze dropped down and he began to fidget uncharacteristically with his tie.

Sam thinks for a moment about how mad Dean would be if he knew this conversation was why he had kidnapped the angel from the motel. Eh. At least he’ll have something valid to be angry about this week.

“He broke, Cas. He hasn’t told you, but… When I say he lost himself? He almost died. I think he tried…..” Sam’s gentle voice trailed off momentarily as he became aware that he was now using the same tone to speak to Cas as he used to soothe distressed victims and the inevitable bereaved family members they often came across during hunts. “…I mean, I don’t know that he made the conscious decision, but… the day that you came back, he died. To find a ghost. He was gone for a long time… too long. I don’t think he really cared if he came back. Not with you gone.”

When the angel’s eyes rose back up to Sam’s face, the blue was dangerously dark and his brow furrowed noticeably. “You think Dean would give up like that? Because of me?”

“I think….” Sam spread his hands in a calming gesture. “I just think he was grieving for something… more.”

In a moment of bravery, Sam reached awkwardly into the back seat and rested his hand on the angel’s knee. “I just thought… if I told you, maybe…..” He trailed off, unsure now.

Cas looked down at the hand resting on his dress pants, his gaze giving away that it was a strangely alien sight. Cas and Dean shared friendly touches and personal space often. It was comfortable now, normal. But despite the occasional hug or shoulder clap in their history, Sam didn’t usually invade his space more than he had to. His brief smile was grateful.

His otherworldly blue eyes drifted out of the window and rested on an elderly man headed into the grocery store with a cart, following him for a long moment before he eventually looked back to the younger Winchester.

“Sam, you know that… closeness between Humans and Angels is frowned upon.”

It wasn’t quite an admission, but Sam caught it, a small smile breaking his huge face. 

“Being a rebel is hardly new to you, Cas… and it’s not like you and Dean could create a Nephilim or anything. At least, uh…” Sam’s brow furrowed. Could they? Angels didn’t even have a gender, so how much did the vessel really…..

As if watching the cogs in Sam’s brain turn, Cas interrupted briefly. “No. Male human, male angelic vessel. No Nephilim risk there.” He seemed slightly amused by Sam’s momentary confusion, something akin to a smirk briefly passing his lips.

“Right.” Sam’s laugh was somehow relieved. Good. That would be weird as fuck.

Minutes passed, in not totally uncomfortable silence.

“Sam?”

Pushing his hair back behind his ear, Sam quickly brought his attention back to the angel. “Yeah?” He tried for his best open, accepting smile.

“Am I to take it then, that… You would not be adverse to any change in mine and Dean’s… our… relationship? Such as it is?”  Cas seemed to stumble a little with the wording, finding his tongue betraying him in his moment of need, attempting to voice something he had kept unspoken for the best part of a decade. “I’m… nothing, really. Not quite an angel anymore, not quite a human…. and my vessel is male. Dean hasn’t ever indicated that he would, uh, want….”

Cas’s voice gives up the ghost entirely, a flush working its way out of his white shirt collar, much to Sam’s slightly cruel delight. He took a second to bite back a teasing response, not wanting to spook the angel in a pivotal moment. 

“Castiel.” Using the angel’s full name seemed to calm his gaze and bring his attention back to Sam. “You’re my brother, man. Maybe not by blood born...but damn, by blood spilled, you’re my brother. I can’t tell you what Dean wants, or for sure how he’ll react….but I know what I’ve seen, these past years. Life is too short… human life, anyway. I just wanted you to know so that… if you wanted to talk to him, you’d know you had my blessing and my support. Whatever happens.”

“What if he doesn’t want me, Sam?”

The gigantic Winchester was suddenly floored by the raw vulnerability in the angel’s voice. From his awkwardly turned position in the front of the Impala, all he can do is firmly squeeze Castiel’s knee.

“Well… that’s a very human risk, Cas. You may be an angel again, but you out of them all know what it is to feel…. and I think even as an angel you’re capable of sharing that terrifying little part of humanity. All I can tell you is that I’m here for you dude, as trite as that sounds.”

Cas can only nod, his gaze resting soulfully on Sam’s comforting hand.

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That’s it for today! I’ll be back in a couple of days with Part 2, where we pick up with Dean.

Edit: This fic is now complete! 

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6

[philanddanxreader]

Hair Do

Hello, Love bugs.

This wasn't as much as a request as much as it was someone wanting to hurt me. Well, guess what bitches? I am going to hurt you guys even more. Muhahahaha.

Dan X Reader

Y/D/N= Your daughter’s name

Warnings- rip your heart out with fluff

Okay, so I might ruin your life right now, actually, I’m going to ruin everyone’s lives….. imagine Dan being a dad and doing his 5-year-old daughter’s hair into a ponytail. So many unnecessary clips.-anon

“Daddy! You are making my head hurt!” Y/D/N had requested for her hair to be put into a ponytail this morning. Usually, you would have no problem doing her hair for her but this morning you happen to be running late. You had just jumped out of the shower trying to dry yourself off and get dressed at the same time. As you looked from her to the clock you decided there just wasn’t enough time.

“Mummy is a little late this morning bean.” Just as she started to pout Dan stepped in to help defuse the situation.

“How about Daddy puts your hair up while mummy finishes getting ready for work?” She pondered the idea of letting Dan touch her hair. It was as if she was contemplating on whether or not he has proven himself in the past to be trusted with such a task.

“Ok.” Her sad little pout hadn’t left her face as she took his big hand in hers to drag him towards your bed where you always did her hair. Crawling up the tall bed she planted herself firmly in the middle with her legs crossed with hands in lap. Dan preceded to crawl up onto the bed as well before he was stopped by her little voice. “No Daddy. We need the hairs stuff.” Dan planted his feet on the floor then stood still realising he didn’t actually know where you had been keeping all of her hair ties and clips.

Dan stuck his head into the bathroom where you were fluffing your hair to try and make it look in any way possible, not a hot mess. “Where have you been keeping all her hair things?” He said as he watched you run the towel over your head.

“Under my bedside table in a basket.” Dan gave you some quick thanks before heading back to the agonising room. Once he finally had found all of the hair items he joined your impatient daughter on the bed.

“So, a ponytail is what you want? Well, the good thing Is I am an expert at ponytails.” Y/D/N gave Dan a look as if to say prove it. Dan reached into the basket to find the detangling spray you always put in first. He looked the way it made her hair smell like vanilla. When she would cuddle up to him in the big chair while reading her bedtime stories he would breathe in the scent of her hair still in denial at how big she has grown. He gave her head good sprits before moving on to find the brush. He had put the brush to the top of her head before being instantly rejected.

“No Daddy!” Dan was so confused as to what he could have done in this short amount of time to be told no. “Not the tops. The bottoms.” It wasn’t like Dan hadn’t heard her correctly as much as it was he was utterly confused as to what she meant. “Start at the bottoms like mummy.”

“Oh, do you mean like this?” Dan took the brush and started to brush her hair at the tips of her hair, slowly moving up her hair before getting all of the knots out of her hair with minimal complaint. Just as Dan finished brushing out Y/D/N hair you joined them in the room to find your clothing. Dan looked concerned and Y/D/N looked unimpressed with her Daddies quote unquote hair skills.

“Looks good bean! Daddy is doing such a good job. Why don’t you pick out a ponytail colour and then get some pins and clips ready for him? Hmmm?” Y/D/N took the basket from beside her and started to search for the exact combo of pins and things for her hair as Dan mouthed a thank you in your direction. You nodded as you disappeared into the closet to find something presentable that fit your ever growing belly. Once the items were decided Y/D/N laid out all of the items for her hair before sitting back in her original position waiting for Dan to continue. Dan had seen you do a million ponytails in the past so really how hard could it be?

Dan took the brush and started to gather her little curls into his hand, making sure he was getting every little piece. Once satisfied he gave a little tug to her hair to make it tight for the next step. Dan was confident until her heard a little ow come from the little girl attached to the hair. Dan pulled his bottom lip into his mouth as he attempted to concentrate on getting the pony around the hair. He twisted and pulled the hair through three times before being told it was too tight.

“Headaches daddy.” Dan has heard in the past you be reprimanded for the same thing so he didn’t feel too bad about it. He loosened it at the base thinking it would help. It did help with the tightness but his once high pony was now kind of droopy and sad. Dan tugged on the band taking it out of her hair with one hand while holding the other hair on the other side so he wouldn’t be tugging only at her hair. Trying again Dan did a much better job of making it high but also not too tight. The only problem with only wrapping it around twice was that it wasn’t holding the hair up as nice as the first time. Dan reached for the bobby pin on the bed and put it in the back to try and hold up the hair a bit better. It did seem to work but he quickly realised he would need more than one to get it how he wanted it. It was no longer about his daughter wanting a ponytail. It was about pride and being able to successfully do his daughters hair and prove to her he could also be called upon for hair needs. After a few more bobby pins in the back, he added a few to the top of her head to try and even things out.  Just as Dan was about to ask her if she wanted the pretty clip in the back under the pony you came out of the closet dressed and ready to leave.

“Ok, my two. I am leaving I will see you later. Be good.” Dan didn’t have a chance to ask if what he was doing looked right and your daughter didn’t get the hug she wanted before you left.

“Don’t worry Y/D/N. Mummy will be back in about an hour. She just had to go in for a quick meeting. After that, she will come home for lunch and we can both take you to kindergarten.” Y/D/N nodded sadly. She knew you wouldn’t be gone long and that she would have fun with her Daddy but it still made her sad that you left without a goodbye. “Let’s finish your hair. Shall we?” Y/D/N nodded sitting up straight again for Dan to finish. Dan took the big sparkly clip and put it under her pony like you would often do. Dan made your daughter spin and face him to make she he was happy with the look. When she spun and sat still Dan was disappointed to find that the look he was going for was not doing so well in the front.

Dan reached into the basket to look for more bobby pins to only come up short. The closest thing he could find was some little butterfly clips in rainbows that seemed to do the trick. Five more butterfly clips later Dan was finally satisfied with his work. It wasn’t exactly like her usual looks but he liked it. Once done he took your daughter down from the bed to go and occupy her time for a while with breakfast and games while the two of them waited for you to return.

When you entered the door a couple of hours later you were greeted at the door by not only your daughter with a head full of bobby pins and clips but also a Dan who had his front curl in a pony with a big clip of a rainbow stuck to the front.

“She didn’t think it was fair that I was the only one who got to do hair this morning.” You kneeled down and hugged your baby girl as she stuck her head on your shoulder, snuggling close.

“You did a good job of Daddies hair my bean. Do you think you could maybe do mine? It’s looking a little crazy after this morning.” Y/D/N run up the stairs without a word to go and fetch you whatever it was she was already planning to do. “I think you should be on hair duty every day.” You said to Dan pulling him into a quick kiss.

“Hell no.”  

[ultralightjoe]

7.5 Pound Gear List

Base weight is the weight of you backpack with everything in it excluding consumables, such as water and food, and the cloths and items that you will intially be wearing. This list is broken down into 5 categories: Shelter & Sleep, Cookware, Pack, Clothing, and Essentials. I have also included the things that wont be going in your pack. If you bring everything on this list your base weight will be slightly less than 7.5lbs and your total pack weight with consumables will be 12.5lbs. The consumables are based on a 3 day trip assuming you will be able to refill your water along the way.

Click here for a Google Sheets version of this list

SHELTER & SLEEP

Tarptent Saddle 2

Very spacious two person tent and for the price there is no competition. Costs $329 and weighs in at 37oz with steaks and guy-lines. If its split between two people one would carry 20oz and the other would carry 17oz. If you are going solo consider using just a hammock.

Therm-a-Rest NeoAir XLite Sleeping Pad

This is a staple for any ultralight backpacker, it offers great comfort, an R-Value of 3.2, and if you get the small size it weighs only 8oz. Although the price is on the higher side for sleeping pads $129.95 but it’s well worth its value. Another sleeping pad worth mentioning is the Therm-a-Rest Z-lite SOL, it can be used either on its own or in addition to an inflatable sleeping pad. One of the things I love about the SOL is that is doubles a seat when you are around camp.

Hammock Gear Borrow 30

Using a sleeping quilt rather than a bag is becoming a pretty popular trend among backpackers. The idea behind using a quilt is when you are laying on top of down you are compressing the fill and thus making that portion of it ineffective, so why carry the extra weight? You sleeping pad will provide you with plenty of insulation from underneath and you get all the warmth from the quilt wrapped around you. This quilt is especially well made. With a conservative rating of 30 degrees it weighs in at 15.75oz.

COOKWARE

FOHOZ Ultra-light Stove

Weighing in at only 25g, this is the lightest canister stove you can find. That’s less than an ounce! To top it off it will only cost you $15. Like any piece of gear, when you have something that is light and cheep you are going to sacrifice on function. It will burn through your fuel pretty quick and it has a pretty small surface for your pot to sit on (only 3 points 2" apart). The pros far outweigh the cons in my opinion though.

Evernew TI Ultralight Deep Pot 0.9 L

Everynew makes the lightest titanium pots that I have found on the market. This one comes in at 4.4oz and the lid is a frying pan. I like this pot because it is big enough to make coffee for two people and the frying pan gives you a some more options when it comes to food you can bring and prepare on the trail. A lot of people may think the frying pan is unessisary, and it is in a lot of cases, but it really doesn’t add much more weight than a standard lid. A difference of 0.2oz.

Oaks Large Ultralight Titanium Spoon

I am still searching for the perfect utensil to bring but this is the best I have found so far. It weighs 17g and it’s plenty long so i’m not dealing with getting my hands covered in food when I dig into a Mt. House pouch. I also like the fact that it is slightly flat on the end to make it easier to scrape the bottom of my pot when I cook my own food. The polished bowl make for easy clean up.

I also like to bring a set of cheap chopsticks for when I bring noodles. I usually just grab a couple extra when I go out for Phở. They also work great for starting a fire, especially if you bring the paper sleeve they come in.

Genuine Joe 10oz Insulated Ripple Hot Cup

I know a lot of hikers only use one pot for everything but I like to eat my breakfast/ dinner and have a drink at the same time. Again, still looking for the perfect mug/cup but this one is the lightest I have found. It’s only 16g but it’s paper so you have to be careful with it. I was using the GSI Cascadian Cup which is a little bit larger, heaver, but also more ridged which I like. The Cascading Cup weighs 1.7oz. If you have any suggestions please let me know!

Sawyer Squeeze Water Filter System

When is comes to water filtration there really is no competition. The Sawyer Squeeze filters everything you need, it’s super compact, and only weighs 3oz. It comes with 3 pouches to hold water, I only bring the two 32oz pouches on most trips. The pouches weigh 1oz each so again, it doesn’t get much lighter than this for water storage. I prefer the full size squeeze to Sawyer Mini because it seems to have a much higher flow rate and will keep that flow rate for a much longer time.

PACK

Zpacks Arc Blast Backpack

I love this pack! The external frame is perfect and it is virtually waterproof. Not to mention the ultralight weight of 21oz. There are other Ultralight packs out there but none with the frame and support of this one. It makes putting in those long miles that much easier. I also bring the belt pouch because I like to have snacks and things accessible while I’m hiking.

Ursack S29.3 Allwhite

If you haven’t hear about these yet you need to check out this video. It’s not officially approved as a bear safe container in a lot of national parks but it’s about half the weight of the lightest bear container on the market at 7.8oz. Ursack is working to get it approved in all parks but only a few have caught on. Your food may get smushed but a bear won’t get it. Better yet, the bear won’t even smell it if you also use the OPSak, and odor proof bag to put your food in. I usually only bring the OPSak because it only weighs 1oz and if a critter can’t smell your food they won’t try to get it.

CLOTHING IN PACK

Marmot Essence Jacket

A jacket that weighs only 6.3oz is bound to make it into any ultralight backpackers list. Despite its super thin fabric it still feels like a solid jacket and it does a great job of keeping the water off you.

Mountain Hardwear Ghost Whisperer

This jacket is the king of ultralight puffys. With all the functionality and a minimal design this is my favorite jacket. It’s water resistant so you don’t have to worry about it becoming useless if you get caught in the rain wearing it. Most sizes are less than 8oz and it has a hood for that extra warmth on a really cold night. Believe me, this keeps you plenty warm, especially if you are layering properly.

Wrangler Men’s Long Sleeve Plaid Fleece Shirt

Sure, there are lighter fleeces out there, but I like this one. It looks great and does the job. I like to have buttons so open it all the way up if I am getting a little too warm but don’t want to take it off entirely.

Patagonia Brodeo Beanie

This is a great hat. It’s made with merino wool so it doesn’t smell bad after 3 days of wearing it without showering and it keeps you nice and warm. You can wear it with the edge flipped up or down.

Hestra Touch Warmth Liner Glove

I used to think bringing a pair of gloves was a waste of weight, but boy they sure are nice to have on a cold night when you are trying to make dinner or get a fire started. These fit really well and only weigh 3oz for the pair. You can also use a touch screen while wearing them, so if you are using your phone as your map then you don’t have to take them off. Again, merino wool so they keep your hands nice and warm without causing them to sweat.

Smartwool Men’s PhD Outdoor Light Mini Socks

I always bring a total of two pairs of socks, I’ll wear one pair while I wash the other. These socks hold up really well and they keep your feet dry and warm in most conditions. If the weather is going to be really cold or you know you sleep cold you may want to consider bringing the SmartWool Men’s Hike Medium Crew as one or both of your socks instead. You can hike in the thinner pair and save the thicker pair for sleeping in.

ESSENTIALS

Suunto Clipper L-B NH Compass

This compass is nothing fancy but it does what I need it to do and it’s reliable. When I am out backpacking I don’t need to plot points on a map or find the exact distance of something because I do that all before hand. I really only need to find my direction if I get turned around in an area that I’m unfamiliar with and that’s what this compass will do. I like the fact that is has a declination adjustment on it and it only weighs 5g.

Liberty Mountain Compact Toothbrush

It only weighs 11g which might be a little more than cutting the handle off a regular toothbrush but that makes it so hard to use and keep clean.  I like this toothbrush because it has a cover that doubles as a handle. The handle is long enough so you aren’t sticking your fingers in your mouth to reach the back teeth and you don’t have to worry about it getting dirty in your pack because it has the cover.

Peppermint Dr. Bronners

Behold, the almighty backpackers soap. I use this as soap to clean my body, my hair, my dishes, wounds, I even use it as toothpaste. It’s super concentrated so you really only need a couple drops to clean your dishes, 5 or 6 to wash your body, about 1 drop on your toothbrush for your teeth. I repackage it in a 15ml eye dropper and that will last you on a good 6-7 day trip. (Disclaimer: It does not taste good in your mouth like toothpaste but it gets the job done)

Adventure Medical Kit Ultralight & Watertight

This nifty kit has everything you need and its pretty minimal. I have actually taken a few items out like a couple band-aids and some of the antiseptic towelettes and repackaged it into a small zip-lock bag. You can also just use the items in this kit as a reference for items to make your own with.

Sawyer Premium Insect Repellent

This spray works great a repelling all sorts of little pests, even ticks and jiggers. It lasts super long (12 hours against ticks and mosquito), it also works on your clothes which can’t be said about most other bug sprays. Plus, it’s made with Picaridin which is a whole lot safer then DEET. It also comes in a convenient 15ml spray bottle.

Deejo Linerlock Juniper 37 gram Folding Knife

A 37g knife with an almost 4" blade?! Not to mentions its super sleek design. This makes a great backpacking knife. You can also get a 15g version with a smaller blade.

Petzl E+LITE Emergency Headlamp

I decided to make a bit of a sacrifice with the brightness of the light that I bring for a huge weight difference. This light only weighs 27g with the battery! It lasts quite a long time, and is bright enough for setting up camp, making dinner, or getting a fire started after it gets dark. You could potentially use this for a pretty easy night hike but I wouldn’t recommend doing anything too technical with this headlamp. Alternatively you could also use the GLAREE E03 Flashlight, this light is quite a bit brighter and if you wear a hat with a bill it can clip on to it as a pseudo headlamp.

Vargo Titanium Flint Lighter

This is a great little product, however it’s not the easiest to use. It’s super light and will last a really long time on one flint (something like 1000 times). It’s great for starting your stove or something that has a combustible fuel source, but if you aren’t a skilled fire starter I would recommend bringing a regular old Bic lighter.

Gear Aid Tenacious Tape Patches

There’s not much worse than being a couple days into your hike with a flat sleeping pad or a leaky rain jacket. I always bring at least two patches of tenacious tape and a little bit of super glue just in case. The super glue can also come in handy if you need emergency field stitches.

WORN & CARRIED

Columbia Men’s Silver Ridge Long-Sleeve Shirt

I’m really not too picky about my baser layer as long as it’s not cotton, it’s comfortable, and has a good fit, I’m happy. This shirt fits that criteria. If you will be hiking in really cold weather you may want to consider something like this.

Northface Men’s Straight Paramount 3.0 Convertable Pants

When I was looking for the perfect hiking pants there were just a few things that were important to me. I wanted them to be convertible, fit well, comfortable, and made with a quick drying material. These pants are slim fitting and super comfortable, which isn’t the easiest thing to find in hiking pants. If you are hiking in colder weather the Columbia Titan Ridge II Pants are really great for giving you the extra warmth you need.

Vivo Primus Trail FG

This shoe’s firm ground minimalist sole gives you grip on tough, rocky terrains. Quick draining mesh and a protective ankle collar mean better off road, cross country performance. Keep your feet barefoot with less running shoe and more sensory feedback. If this isn’t enough shoe for you then check out the Tracker FG.

Cascade Mountain Tech Carbon Fiber Trekking Poles

I never liked hiking with trekking poles but with the tent that I use now they are required. After using them for a while I actually realize how helpful they really are. These ones are lightweight, durable, and inexpensive. They haven’t broken on me yet.

iPhone X

Any smartphone will work really but c'mon… I use my iPhone as a watch, a camera, and my map. (Warning: only use your phone as a map/navigation if you are familiar with the area you are hiking in, know for sure your batter will not die, and have an offline map.) If its a longer trip I will bring paper maps printed on waterproof paperusing caltopo maps and a regular inkjet printer.

Sony Alpha a6300 Mirrorless Digital Camera

This is one of the best mirror-less (lighter wight) camera on the market. It will cost a pretty penny, but if you want to get professional quality photos on the trail it’s well worth it. At just over 14oz (not including a lens) you aren’t sacrificing that much weight either.

CONSUMABLES

First Day

Breakfast - eat a big breakfast off trail

Lunch - tuna salad & crackers

Snack - granola, sesame bars, or jerky

Dinner - Indomie Mi Goreng noodles 3 packs

Drink - hot toddy: Good Earth Tea, gin/whiskey, and True Lemon Crystals

Cigar/Pipe Tobacco

Second Day

Breakfast - “breakfast skillet” wrapped in a tortilla with Tapatio

Coffee - instant coffee packet

Snack - granola, sesame bars, or jerky

Lunch - cheese & crackers

Snack - granola, sesame bars, or jerky

Dinner - beans & rice with fritos and cheese

Drink - hot cocoa with gin/whiskey

Cigar/Pipe Tobacco

Third Day

Breakfast - loaded power oats

Coffee - instant coffee packet

Snack - granola, sesame bars, or jerky

Lunch - tuna salad & crackers

Snack - granola, sesame bars, or jerky

Dinner - eat a nice dinner off trail