#i barely know anything about banana cookie

[uselessalexis165]

Quick things I made with the comic creator (234/?)

[teamchasezwrites]

Sober

Word Count: 15,807

Characters: Damian Priest/Cassie(OC), minor appearances by: Rhea Ripley, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Jimmy Uso, Jey Uso, Finn Balor

Genre: Smut, Romance

Tags: Explicit Sexual Content, Getting Together, Dirty Talk, Kissing, Oral Sex, Consensual Touching, Almost Car Sex, Wall Sex, Vaginal Sex, Love Confessions

Summary: Cassie's sober now and finally ready to act on her drunken confession.

Author's Note: I've been hit up so many times for a follow up to 'Tell Me When You're Sober'. It's finally here! This piece of work went through two revisions and a complete rewrite taking me almost a month to complete. I hope you all enjoy! INVY is a real night club in Indianapolis. A little bit of personal growth for me. I just used the name and did no other research on it. Previously I would know everything about it down to the color of the bathroom walls.

Previous Part: Tell Me When You're Sober (Don't have to read to understand, but it sure helps.)

The beat of the music pulsed loudly as Cassie made her way into INVY, an upscale club in downtown Indianapolis. The heat in the building from all the bodies a direct contrast from the near freezing temperature outside. Even then she still felt a shiver run through her as the chill clung to her exposed arms and legs. She tried to get away with wearing jeans and a simple black t-shirt, but Rhea had taken one look at her and nearly recreated the scene from Cinderella where the stepsisters started pulling at her dress.

It wasn’t quite that dramatic she supposed, but it ended with a phone call. The next thing Cassie knew, Bianca was knocking on the door with a black stretchy ruched mini tank dress. It was sleeveless and fell entirely too short for her liking. She already pulled it down three times from where their Uber dropped them off to the door where security let them in without hesitation. Naomi came through with a pair of knee high black boots with a chunky heel.

The trio deemed her good enough and pulled her from her room barely able allowing her enough time to grab the small black shoulder purse. Thankfully it was already ready to go; packed with her license, debit card, credit card for emergencies, hotel room key, cash, phone and lip balm. What she didn’t have time to grab was a coat. Not that she had anything to go with the borrowed outfit.

“Why on earth would you need a coat?” Bianca laughed as the three of them crowded together in the backseat of the Uber.

“It’s gonna be so hot inside you’ll be wanting to take clothes off!”

Cassie hardly thought so as she once again pulled her dress down sending up a prayer it wasn’t one of those dresses you had to decide if you wanted to pull it up or pull it down. The club scene was definitely not her scene. The club scene she preferred was a cracker with two slices of pepperoni and a slice of cheddar cheese.

Or maybe a Subway Club. A six inch stuffed full of turkey, ham, roast beef with cheese. Loaded with lettuce, tomato, pickles, banana peppers, green peppers, onion. Some mustard and mayo to top it off. A side of chocolate chip cookies…

Cassie’s mouth watered. Damn she wished Subway was open this late. Man she wished she was back in Philadelphia where she could walk into Wawa and order exactly that. Wawa didn’t offer chocolate chip cookies but she’d settle for brownie or a chocolate chip muffin. Or better yet – a side of creamy mac and cheese.

She should have eaten more in catering but she hadn’t planned on being awake at this hour. That all changed when Jey won the Men’s Royal Rumble. That meant partying. And there was no way she was going to get out of it. Not with Rhea around.

“Who’s got first round?” Rhea asked as she lead them through the crowd to the bar.

Cassie looked around and noticed the glances in their direction. Watched as lips moved in hushed, whispered words. Though with the volume of the music, she knew the words were probably yelled in ears.

“Who got tossed first?” Naomi asked looking at her and Bianca.

“We all got tossed together,” Bianca said dryly, rolling her eyes.

That was true. A group of them were fighting on the apron, desperately trying not to fall off the edge. She being one of them, tangled up with Zelina Vega. Then Nia Jax came up and shoved Bianca, who was was bent over the top rope, to the ground causing the whole pile to fall, including Naomi.

“I think I hit first because you definitely fell on me.”

“Sorry,” Bianca laughed at her. “Raquel had my hair, I was going wherever she was.”

Which was right next to her. Cassie caught a glancing elbow on the way to the floor before Bianca came raining down. She tried to catch her, but pretty much became a pillow to cushion her fall.

“Better yet, I think the champion should buy the first round.”

Rhea laughed as three sets of eyes turned toward her. She laughed and pulled out a couple of folded bills from the pocket of her tight black pants. “Alright. First round’s on me.”

Rhea got the bartender’s attention and ordered her drink then looked at Bianca. Then Naomi before finally resting on her after the other two women named their drinks.

“Just a water.” Cassie said blushing.

“What?”

“Oh hell no!”

“Gurl! We’re celebrating.”

Cassie stared at the women in front of her. Her face burning with embarrassment. She gave in to the silent looks and turned to the bartender ordering a vodka cranberry.

“Such a white girl drink,” Naomi laughed as she took her drink.

Cassie shrugged and took the drink, swirling the mixing straw around the ice cubes and slices of lime. She lifted the glass to her lips and took a sip. The tangy sweetness of the cranberry burst on her tongue. It did hit the spot. A chilling drink in the near oppressive body heat. She supposed one drink wouldn’t hurt.

“Let’s go find the boys.” Bianca tucked her arm through Naomi’s and drew her into the crowd.

“Since when don’t you drink?” Rhea’s lips practically tickled her ear as she pressed to her side. Her arm tucked through Cassie’s like their friends in front of them.

“Since I made an ass out of myself last month.”

The sting of embarrassment was just as sharp as it was nearly six weeks ago when she woke with a massive hangover and a complete recollection of the night before. How she practically threw herself at Damian. Definitely propositioned him. And wholeheartedly professed her love to him.

She knew Rhea’s groan wasn’t louder than the music, but she still felt it deep in the pit of her stomach.

“Hold on,” Rhea took her hand and led her away from where Bianca and Naomi already entered the VIP area, filled with various wrestlers. She couldn’t help but search the crowd disappointment setting in when she failed to find who she was searching for. Then her heart flipped when she caught sight of him tucked behind so many people she only saw his hair. Pulled back into his signature bun with the braids hanging down the back. He laughed at that moment, his head tilting back and bodies moved and she had an unobscured view of his profile. The sharp jaw, pointed nose, crinkled eye.

Then she lost sight as bodies moved again and she was pulled through people to a tucked away piece of wall offering a semblance of privacy.

“What’s going on?”

Cassie blinked and stared at Rhea. “Nothing? You know this isn’t my scene.”

“We’re just here for a little bit. Drink. Chill. Hang out.”

“I feel exposed.”

“Please. You’re practically wearing a parka compared to everyone else.” Rhea ran her eyes over the patrons near them. The skimpy skirts and barely there tops. They were surrounded by cleavage and ass cheeks.

“I just…” Cassie blew out a breath and sagged against the wall. “I need to keep my whits about me.”

“But why?” Rhea pushed, stepping closer as bodies seemed to press closer. The music seemed to have gotten louder as Cassie’s voice softened.

“Because the last time I drank, I made a fool of myself.”

Rhea’s face softened. “No you didn’t.”

“I told him I wanted sink to my knees and choke on him. Ride him ‘til the wheels fall off.” Cassie’s face reddened as she saw a girl look in her direction. She took another drink and realized it was almost gone.

“Man’s a fucking Saint,” Rhea laughed. She lifted her arm and squeezed Cassie’s shoulder. She knew everything that happened that night. From both Cassie’s perspective and Damian’s. It was absolute maddening. She was practically squealing over the video chat when Cassie filled her in a few days later after having to nearly pry the story out of her. Damian took much longer and it wasn’t until the holiday live tour in Pittsburgh – the first time he’d been in Cassie’s company since that night in Boston – he opened up to her when he realized she didn’t remember. “I can’t believe you let him think you don’t remember.”

“What was I supposed to do?”

“Jump his bones!” Rhea shouted exasperated. “You should have beaten down his door the next morning and jumped him the moment he opened it.”

“I didn’t have him room number.” Her smile was weak at the look she received from Rhea. She knew one text to her would have armed her with that information. “But what if…”

“What if what Cassie?” Rhea straightened, her arms folding across her body. Her drink grasped in the fingertips. The glass covered in condensation. “He straight up told you he liked you. I told you he liked you. What the fuck are you waiting on? For him to decide it was just a drunken escapade on your part? That you didn’t mean it?” She narrowed her eyes. “You meant it didn’t you?”

“Of course!” Cassie exploded throwing her arms up in the air, nearly upending her drink. An ice cube escaped and slid across the floor. “I meant every single word,” she whispered harshly. “You know this. You know how I feel about him. Isn’t that why you sent him after me that night?”

Rhea blinked at the words. “I didn’t send him after you.” She frowned in confusion. “Cas, he asked me where you were. He was worried because you were upset. He wanted to make sure you were okay. Because he fucking loves you.” She nearly growled the final sentence.

Cassie deflated leaning back against the wall. She stared at their feet. Rhea’s black combat looking boots. The simple knee highs with the pointed toes. Her eyes closed and she blew out a breath. The music pounded in her ears. It felt like her pulse synched up with the beat. “I don’t know what to do.” She raised her head to meet Rhea’s eyes. “I feel so��� paralyzed. And now he’s on a different show. I don’t even know when our paths will cross again. Wrestlemania?”

“You end this tonight,” Rhea said as she stepped closer and ducked her head. “You tell him you remember and you meant every single word. Then you kiss the shit out of him. Drag him back to your room and cross off some of the items on your list.” She smirked when Cassie ducked her head in embarrassment. “Come on,” she took her hand. “I need another drink.”

“Oh but…” Cassie started but fell silent as Rhea lead her back through the throngs of people pressed together on the dance floor. She felt a hand brush over her ass. By the time she turned her head to look it was just a blur of bodies; no way to tell who touched her.

“What’s your poison?” Rhea asked as they crowded in at the end of the bar.

“Oh I don’t know…” Cassie hesitated as she put her empty glass on the bar and pushed it in toward the other side.

“One more drink won’t hurt you.”

“I just don’t want to show my ass again.”

Rhea grinned. “With that dress you won’t need much help.” She laughed watching her friend frantically tug at the hem of her dress. She pulled her phone from her back pocket along with her cash.

“I think I’m supposed to get this round.”

“Well I won’t complain if you wanna buy me a drink,” Rhea grinned and opened her phone. “Come here,” she tugged Cassie closer, pressing their cheeks together and lifted her arm in the air. Their faces appeared on the screen. Eyes crinkled reflecting their big grins.

Cassie shook her head as she watched Rhea fiddle with her phone and turned back to the bar. She waved the bartender down and ordered herself and Rhea a drink. This time she ordered just a club soda disguised in a high ball glass with a lime garnish, figuring she’d get drawn into another alcoholic drink later on or a shot. She was digging in her purse for the folded twenty dollar bill when she caught money out of the corner of her eye slipping around her shoulder. It was then she felt the heat and presence of a body close behind her.

She tensed and turned her head to follow the arm to the man standing too close behind her.

“I’ll buy your drink Baby.”

His smile was slick and he reminded her of the guys at the bar in Boston. She didn’t want to be in that position again.

“No thanks,” Cassie said, her smile polite. The last thing she wanted to do was make a scene.

“Oh come on… let me buy you a drink. We’ll head out on the dance floor… get to know each other better.” From the smirk he was sending her, she knew exactly what he meant. If she accepted the drink and dance, she’d spent the entire time fighting to keep his hands from her body.

Cassie heard Rhea laugh next to her and looked over. She still had her phone in her hand her fingers moving over the screen. She turn around and found the guy even closer. He towered over her and unlike with Damian it didn’t make her feel safe. It felt intimidating. The bar pressed against her back as she tried to lean as far away as she could. One more time she tried to get out of the unwanted situation. “No thank you, I’m not interested.”

“I’d listen to her.” Rhea pressed the button on the side of her phone sending her screen to black. She looked up taking in the scene in front of her. Outwardly she appeared indifferent but on the inside she was seething. She hated guys who wouldn’t take no for an answer. Hated how they always seemed to be able to pinpoint the kind of girl who was too polite to tell them off, who could usually be talked into a drink or two because they didn’t want to cause a scene.

“I’m just trying to get to know her. She might like my company and want to spend more time with me.”

Rhea shrugged, her smile widening. “I’m just letting you know her boyfriend probably wouldn’t like it.”

“What boyfriend?”

“Me Pendejo.”

Cassie’s eyes widened at Damian’s voice and she watched as the man in front of her straightened from where he’d been leaning into her. When he turned, she was able to see Damian standing behind him. Intimidating in his own right dressed in all black with his tattoo covered arms on display. His jaw clench hard enough his cheek ticked. His eyes dark and lethal. His fists clenched at his sides causing his biceps to bulge.

She could have melted at his feet right there. Had to clench her thighs at the onslaught of arousal. Wetness pooled at her center and she sucked her bottom lip between her teeth.

Before she could completely become a puddle on the floor, Cassie grabbed her purse from the bar and slid the bartender her twenty dollar bill to pay for the drinks. She grabbed her soda after shouldering her purse and sidestepped from behind the man still in front of her. The last thing anyone needed was Damian to punch the man and judging by the scowl on his face, he was close.

“Hey man, I didn’t know she was taken.” The man’s grin reminded her of a car salesman.

“Probably should have listened when she told you no the first time,” Rhea supplied as she grabbed her drink. She took a sip to hide her smirk. Damian moved as quick as she thought he would when she sent him a text telling him of Cassie’s unwanted attention at the bar in response to his text of asking where they were. No doubt he saw Bianca’s and Naomi’s arrival and questioned why she and Cassie weren’t with them.

Cassie watched as Damian’s eyes got impossibly darker and he seemed to grow in height. The look menacing and she was a little fearful at what he might do. When he lifted an arm, she ducked underneath it and pressed against his side. Her arm wrapped around his back. She tilted her head to look up at him, a smile on her lips. “You made it!”

A sense of Deja-vu hit Damian. His hand dropped to the small of her back, keeping her to him. Over her head, his eyes never left the man behind her. It was just like that night in Boston.

“Just got here,” Damian let his eyes drop to Cassie. She wasn’t drunk this time. There was a red hue to her cheeks like that night, but this time her eyes were clear.

“Come on,” Cassie grabbed his hand. The roughness of his palm on hers. The long fingers slotting with hers. With a tug, he turned and followed her away from the bar.

“She saved your life buddy,” Rhea grinned as she pushed away from the bar. Her drink in one hand, the one she ordered Damian while watching the show in front of her in the other hand. “Next time when a girl tells you no, believe them.” She wiggled a pinky in his direction as a wave as she disappeared into the crowd following Damian and Cassie.

“That better not be water!”

Cassie looked down at her drink at Bianca’s words as she and Damian entered the VIP area. She lifted the glass in her hand and tipped it in her direction. “It’s not.” It was club soda so she technically wasn’t lying.

“This bitch tried to order a water earlier! We just fucking got here!”

“I figured someone outta keep their head about them tonight,” Cassie teased even as her face flamed.

“Nah man, we’re here to party!” Jimmy said as he came up to them and slung an arm around his wife. “Yo Rhea, you double fisting?”

“Aye shit! That’s how you do it!” Jey joined the group. His smile was huge. Eyes wide and bright. Cassie was certain if she looked she’d find his feet weren’t even on the ground. “One of them for me Mama?”

“Sorry Uce,” Rhea lifted the drink in the air and passed it toward Damian. “It’s for Damian. He deserves it.”

“Hey,” Damian chuckled and reached for the glass filled with ice cubes and a dark liquid. “Gracias.” The joining of Jey to their small circle caused movement and shifting. Unfortunately Cassie dropped his hand but she stayed in front of him, slightly to his left. Close enough that if he turned his head, he could bury his nose in her hair.

“Deserves it?” Jey exclaimed, affronted. “Whatchu mean? I won the Rumble Uce!”

“He helped scare off a jerk at the bar who was hitting on Cassie.”

“You wasn’t scary enough?” The group broke out into laughter at Jimmy’s words.

“It was so much better to see the douchebag’s face when he turned around and saw Damian behind him.” Rhea smirked.

“I’m sure you was smiling…”

While their conversation turned to their best menacing looks, Cassie took a small step back until she was brushing up against Damian. His hand rested on the small of her back and she could feel the heat of the touch through her fingers. She turned her head and tilted it up. Her eyes caught Damian’s and she smiled. “Thank you for the rescue.”

Damian lowered his head, “what was that?” His hand slid to her hip where his fingers pressed lightly.

“I said thanks for the rescue earlier,” Cassie leaned closer to speak directly in his ear. His cologne drifted through her nose and she nearly groaned. She wanted to bury her face in the crock of his neck and breathe him in.

Damian lifted his head so he could shoot Cassie a smile. “Anytime Corazòn,” he said with a wink.

Cassie felt warmth all over at the whispered word. Sometimes she woke up to a whispered ‘Corazòn’ in her ear with a phantom weight pressing down upon her. It left her feeling empty and alone. She had no one to blame but herself. After all, she led him to believe she didn’t remember when the opposite was true.

She couldn’t forget that night. Her subconscious liked to bombard her with memories of that night. Little details like the smell of his cologne – the same that filled her nose right now. The feeling of his beard against her temple when they took the selfie together in his car. The taste of his lips on hers. The feeling of his cock beneath her hand as she tried desperately to free it from his jeans.

She brought her glass to her lips as her body heated with her thoughts. The club soda did little to cool her down and she actually wished for the sting of alcohol. There had to be a way to break the continuous loop they were stuck in. The cycle had the chance to last a lifetime. As much as she hated to admit it, Rhea was right. It was up to her to do something. Damian thought she didn’t remember. Probably assumed it was just drunk girl talk. He had no idea…

“Hold up! Every smile!”

Cassie turned her focus back to the group where Bianca had dug her phone out and was holding it up in the air to take a picture of the group.

There were laughs and shoves as the group closed ranks and gathered in close; pressing together until all their faces showed up on Bianca’s screen. Her, Damian, Rhea, Jey, Naomi, Bianca, Jimmy, Montez. Half of Bayley’s face in the corner of the frame. Natalya stretched up from behind the group.

“Let’s dance!”

A cheer went up and Cassie found herself being drug away from Damian. Her pleading and the scrambling of her feet as she tried to back pedal had no effect as Rhea pulled her out with the rest of the ladies. The girls stayed in their group and found a spot to dance together. Before long she found herself moving to the music. It was hard not to with Bayley and Naomi egging her on.

She lost herself to the fun of the music and being able to let go. Drinks they brought onto the dance floor were finished. More replaced them when Bianca and Naomi went to get the next round. Her purse disappeared at one point during a replacement round of drinks. It became a hindrance always falling off her shoulder. Dozens of photos were taken and her cheeks hurt from laughing. She wasn’t sure how much time had passed before she was begging off for a break. Her feet were sore and a thin sheen of sweat covered her arms.

“Tell the boys to get their asses out here!”

“With drinks!”

Cassie nodded and moved away from the women to make her way back to the private area. Upon entering she saw Damian sitting in a low back leather chair. The table in front littered with drinks. Jimmy sat in a matching chair. Austin Theory in the other. Finn crouched between Damian and Austin. Her head tilted and her heart stumbled when she saw her purse sitting in his lap. Like it was his responsibility to keep an eye on it.

The longer she stared, the more she wanted to go over and sit on his lap. Feel a hand on her waist securing her to him or a warm hand lingering in her thigh. She imagined how he would lift it as he talked but would always place it back on her thigh. How his fingers would caress the skin above her knee before lifting it to gesture.

She needed a drink.

“Your presence is being requested,” Cassie told Jimmy as she walked up to them, breaking the conversation. “And they said don’t come empty handed.”

“Shit,” Jimmy groaned as he stood up. “Come help,” he slapped Austin on the shoulder. “Anything else?”

“Just to tell the boys to get their asses out there. I have a feeling if you don’t, they’ll be coming to drag you out there.”

Cassie watched as Jimmy and Austin walked away. She turned around and smiled at Finn. “Hey Finn.”

“Cas,” the Irish wrestler stood up and gave her a hug. “How are ya?”

“Trying not to have a hangover tomorrow. Rhea and I are road tripping to Cleveland.”

Finn chuckled. “The last thing ya need is Rhea driving.”

“Right. I didn’t pack my rosary this weekend.” She laughed as Damian and Finn joined in. It was common knowledge and a frequent poke at Rhea for her driving. Sometimes she would forget she was driving in the States and be on the wrong side. She always drove a little reckless no matter what side of the road she was on. When she squeezed into their car on days they drove to the next show, Damian or Finn always drove.

“We’re driving too,” Finn said as the laughter died. “We don’t have the room or you two could just come with us.”

“Sure be like old times.” Sort of anyway. Old times didn’t have Liv and Raquel.

“Sort of anyway,” Finn echoed Cassie’s unspoken thought. “Someone had to go and leave.” He turned to look at Damian, a teasing glint in his eyes.

“Easy man,” Damian chuckled. “They just got tired of seeing me kicking your ass every week.”

Finn laughed at his friend’s words. “I couldn’t help but noticed you didn’t last very long in the rumble.”

“Before you start measuring, I’m gonna go get that drink.” Cassie reached for her purse as Damian stood up.

“I’ll come with, I need a refill.” Damian nodded at Finn, choosing to ignore his friend’s knowing smirk. He passed Cassie the purse he’d been holding since Rhea handed it to him on a quick pass by as she was getting another round of drinks. He would forever deny the feeling it had given him. A task as simple as holding a purse felt like the world had been handed to him. “What’s your poison?” He asked when they reached the bar in the VIP section.

It was a little smaller than the main bar where he rescued her earlier. He felt himself bristle with anger remembering Rhea’s texts. First the selfie of her and Cassie, then the text about the man hitting on her. He barely controlled his anger when he saw them. Cassie trapped against the bar. The man crowding her. He wanted to rip him away from her. Felt just like that night back in Boston when he saw her sitting in a man’s lap allowing him to put his hands on her. Too drunk to even do anything about it.

“Just a coke,” Cassie placed her purse on the bar. She began to unzip it when a hand was placed over hers. She looked up meeting Damian’s eyes.

“I got it Corazòn.” His fingers curled around her hand, pressing into her palm. The touch sent a bolt up his arm, zapping his heart. Her eyes held his. The green eyes captivating him as he watched the lights from the club dance in them. The way she tilted her head made him want to lean down and kiss her.

“Seventeen bucks.”

The bartender interrupted and Damian looked away as they hands fell apart. He dug his wallet from his back pocket and slid a bill across the bar. “Keep it,” he told him. He tucked his wallet back into his pocket and a quick glance of his fingers over the other pocket confirmed his phone was still there.

He grabbed their glasses and passed Cassie her coke. “Have you been faking it this whole night?” He asked, nodding toward the glass.

Cassie shook her head and took a sip of the refreshing soda. “No. I’ve had a couple. Mostly from peer pressure or when someone would shove a drink in my hand. Though Rhea did bring me water disguised in a high ball glass with a lime during the last round. I could have kissed her.”

“Any reason you’re not drinking tonight?”

Cassie’s face flamed as a blush took hold. “You mean other than not wanting Rhea to drive tomorrow?”

“That’s as good a reason as any.” A hint of longing coursed through him thinking about Rhea and Cassie driving to Cleveland; wishing he could be in the car with them. But he was flying back to New York instead.

“Actually I do have a reason for not drinking…” The words tumbled from her mouth before her brain could process. She ducked her head staring at the floor.

“Say cheese!”

Cassie lifted her head to see Natalya in front of them holding up her cell phone. The woman was always taking photos of everyone. There were a few she’d received from her she coveted. The smile on her face was organic as she wrapped her arm around Damian. She moved closer to him as his hand came to rest on her hip. She leaned against him, tilting her head until she felt his jaw. Then she sort of just melted into him.

“Beautiful!” Natalya smiled after she snapped the photo. It felt a little too intimate and decided not to include it in her stories least she start rumors or out a relationship that wasn’t ready to be disclosed. With a wiggle of her fingers, she left the two wrestlers at the bar and went off to find Rhea.

Cassie sighed, her shoulders sagging. Natalya’s interruption halted the conversation she wasn’t sure she was ready to have. It was both a good and bad thing. This…whatever she and Damian had been doing since Boston… was weighing on her. She was tired of pretending she didn’t remember that night.

‘Tell me when you’re sober Corazòn…’

She stayed sober ever since, hoping she’d be able to find the right time…the right moment to tell him everything she said to him that night. She took a deep breath and raised her head. “Can we talk?”

“Of course Corazòn,” Damian’s hand slid from her back to her free hand where he grasped it. He led them away from the bar and through the crowd of people. Heavier now as more people showed up. He wasn’t sure what Cassie wanted to talk about but she seemed pretty troubled. The carefree airy feeling she had around her when she found him a few moments ago disappeared.

Frustration mounted when he failed the find any semblance of privacy. Each place he looked already had people spilling out. The low back chair from earlier. The cushioned bench along the wall where he’d left his leather jacket. The small little alcove. At this point, he assumed even the bathrooms would be crawling with people.

“Did you bring a coat?” Damian asked as an idea popped in his head.

Cassie shook her head. “No. They pretty much pulled me out of my room. Barely even grabbed my purse.” She squeezed his hand and stared at the hold. His hand nearly dwarfing hers. His tanned skin a contrast to her lighter tone.

“Wait here,” Damian told her. He released her hand and cut through the crowd toward that bench on the back wall. His jacket still remained, balled up and shoved back in the corner. “Excuse me,” he said to the guy sitting there. “Just need my jacket.”

When he was armed with it, he gave it a little shake as he walked back toward Cassie, standing right where he left her. Her eyes sweeping around the room. When their gazes collided and he watched the relief cross her features and the smile grace her lips he knew then he was jumping with both feet.

With his jacket laying across his arm and his drink still in one hand, he took Cassie’s hand back in his and led her through the mingling people once more to the door on the side wall leading to a patio.

The cold nearly stole her breath as they stepped outside. It swept across her bare arms and over her thighs, right through her dress. She shivered and wished the drink in her hand was a hot chocolate instead. Or a nice warm smooth whiskey. Warmth surrounded her as Damian’s jacket draped around her shoulders. She placed her drink down on the empty high top table against the stone façade of the building to thread her arms through the sleeves.

She turned around and met his gaze again. This time it wasn’t the wind that stole her breath. It was the look of pure adoration on his face. His eyes so open and expressive as he stared at her. Her arm lifted and her hand cupped the side of his face. The scratchiness of his beard rough against her palm. “You gave me your jacket that night too.”

It was like Damian’s world came screeching to a halt. Everything he thought he knew forever changed. His eyes flared at Cassie’s words. He cupped her face with both of his hands. The movement caused her hand to fall from his face but it didn’t fall far; coming to a stop on his chest right over his heart. Beating exceedingly fast. He took a step forward their bodies nearly touching. He didn’t feel the cold anymore. Now there was a warmth flowing through him.

A vessel of hope.

“Cassie,” he breathed her name like a prayer. He was almost too afraid to voice his next words.

“I had a reason for staying sober tonight…and every day since Boston…” her fingers curled into his chest as she swayed toward him. “Everything I said that night was true from—”

Damian didn’t give her a chance to finish. He ducked his head and captured her lips, silencing her words. Her lips parted on a sigh when he ran his tongue along her bottom lip. He met her tongue with long strokes and short licks. There was no taste of cinnamon tonight. A taste he had since equated with her.

He withdrew his tongue and used his hands to tilt her head to better the angle as their lips moved together. Her hands clutched at his back and he couldn’t wait to feel them moving on his body. He broke their kiss and was rewarded with a moan of protest that hit deep in his gut. This time, he reunited their lips.

“Damian…” Cassie whispered against his lips. During their kiss, she moved forward pressing herself against Damian’s body. Her hands moved from his chest to his back. Her fingers curled in his t-shirt as she clutched him. Her body warmed from the inside out. Pulsing with need and want.

Damian rested his forehead against hers. Their breaths mingled, both breathing heavily. He opened his eyes and watched as she blinked hers open. Pupils blown wide. Full of desire. “Tell me Corazòn…”

“I love you Damian…”

Damian palmed the back of her head, his fingers threading through the loose brown curls. He tucked her into his neck and wrapped his other arm around her back. He held her tight against him as he shuddered. A full body tremor worked him over spreading sweet relief through him. “I love you Corazòn…” he whispered directly into her ear when he ducked his own head. “It was so hard to walk away that night.”

“I didn’t want you to walk away.” Cassie lifted her head to stare at him.

“I had to be sure. I didn’t want you to wake up the next morning, realizing what we did and what happened… I was scared we would never be able to get back on track. Corazòn you’re too important to me to take that chance.”

Cassie went up on her tiptoes to kiss him. She felt it all the way in her toes. The feel of his lips on hers. The sweet, smoky taste of the whiskey he’d been drinking. Her hands trailed from his back down to his waist to his hips where she followed along the waistband of his jeans over his belly. She felt the muscles twitching beneath her touch. “Now will you let me suck your cock?”

Damian reared his head back, his eyes wide as he stared down at her. His cock gave an interested twitch in his jeans, already half hard from their kisses and her ghosting touches on his body. “Dios Mio,” he cursed as he gave an aborted laugh at the straight up raunchy out of the blue question. “You can’t say shit like that.”

“Why not?” Cassie walked her fingers up his chest where he caught her hand with his. She watched him bring her hand to his lips where he kissed her knuckles.

Damian took a step back keeping hold of her hand. “Let’s go Corazòn.”

Cassie shivered at his tone. She held his hand tightly as they slipped back inside, leaving their nearly full drinks behind. The heat of the club suffocated the chill clinging to her body. The music felt ten times louder after having been outside hearing only the muted bass beats. They moved through the crowd of people before exiting out onto the street. She was prepared to get an Uber but was surprised when Damian turned to walk down the sidewalk.

“Did you drive?” She asked, stretching her legs to keep up with his long strides. She broke their hands so she could thread her hand between his arm and body; her fingers curling on his bicep. The move brought her closer to him.

They walked passed multiple bars, patrons and music spilling out of each one of them. Traffic steady on the street next to them as Ubers stalked the bars for fares. She burrowed closer to his side and buried her other hand in the pocket of the jacket trying to ward off the cold.

Once they reached the parking garage, it took only a minute to reach his rental. She quickly climbed in rubbing her hands together.

Damian wasted no time getting behind the wheel and starting the engine. He dug his phone and wallet from his back pockets and tossed them into the cup holders. “We’ll probably be back at the hotel before it even warms up.”

“Fine by me.” Cassie reached for his phone as Damian pulled out onto the street from the parking garage. Without thought her thumb tapped across the screen over the keypad entering in the remembered passcode.

“What are you doing, Corazón?”

“We’re gonna take a photo, so find us a red light.” As luck would have it, the next light turned red and Damian didn’t run the yellow which probably pissed off the car behind him.

Cassie leaned in. She threaded her arm through his, her hand on his bicep. The skin warm to touch despite being outside without a coat and the cool air blowing from the vents as the engine took its time heating up. His head tilted toward her. She held her other arm up in the air capturing them both on the screen.

With his Instagram pulled up, Cassie added the photo to a new post and tapped out the caption. Her thumbs moved quickly across the screen. A smiled teased her lips as her body swayed forward in the seat as the car slowed at another red light.

‘Get to be a passenger princesa again! Since he left us I have to drive now because frankly, Rhea scares the crap out of me. Still a highly recommended Uber driver. Five stars.’

She tagged herself in the photo before hitting post. It took a couple seconds before the feed refreshed and the photo appeared at the top of the screen. A dot appeared on the heart in the top right as notifications poured in. She paid then no attention.

Exiting the app she opened up his messages and attached the photo to a blank message. This time she was able to put her phone number in the recipient box. She giggled.

“What’s so funny?” Damian asked hearing the giggle. “Corazòn if you’re posting crazy shit…”

That brought more laughter as it was nearly the same thing he said that night too. “I’m not.” Cassie assured him. She sent the message and felt the vibration under her arm where her phone sat in her purse, still looped over her shoulder but caught beneath the jacket. She tapped on her number and went into the info where she put her name.

Corazòn.

“You have my number now.” Cassie locked the screen and set it back in the cup holder. Settling back in the seat she turned her head letting her eyes run over him. One hand lax on the wheel. The other dangling over his lap from how his elbow was leaning on the center console. The black t-shirt stretched around his bicep. The skull tattoo peeking from beneath. Slouched comfortably in the seat. Black denim stretched over thick thighs. Muscles rippling beneath the denim with each move of Damian’s foot on the pedal. His eyes darting to the rear view mirror and back to the road.

She was going to have to add another item to her list.

At that very moment she wanted to reach across the console and trail her fingers up and down the bunched fabric puckering at his zipper. Wanted to press a kiss to the corner of his lips – right on that tilt – right before trailing her lips to his ear. Where she’d whisper for him to keep his eyes on the road while her fingers pulled his zipper down. She’d free his cock, baring him to the heat of the car, and run her fingers up and down his hard length still nibbling on his ear lobe. When the first drop of pre-come beaded on the tip, she’d duck her head beneath his arm and…

“Dios Mio Corazòn, if you don’t stop looking at me like that…” Damian shifted in the seat trying to relieve the ache in his cock as he slowed to pull into the hotel parking lot. It was packed with cars as most decided to Uber tonight for Jey’s celebration. Luckily toward the back corner was a lone spot. It was a tight fight, but he was able to maneuver the car into the slot.

“I have another thing to add to my list…” Cassie pressed the button of her seat belt. The belt released and crossed her body as it wound back. She removed her arm from its confines and twisted her body as she came up out of the seat to lean over him. She balanced herself with a hand on the console. That left her right to roam.

And roam it did.

It started with fingers lightly grazing his cheek over his ear to the back of his head tangling in the braids. A small amount of pressure had him leaning forward and they were kissing again. Lips moving together and need and want built deep within their bellies.

Cassie’s hand continued its quest. Fingers clutching his shoulder, digging into the hard muscles, as a moan fell from her lips only to be swallowed by Damian. His hand palmed her cheek with his fingers tangling in her hair. Calloused hand against her soft skin. Wetness pooled at her center as she thought about those hands touching every inch of her skin. The soft sensitive skin of her wrists and the insides of her thighs to the ticklish patches where her waist slanted in and the inside of the arches on her feet.

She trailed her hand down his chest feeling his heart beating beneath the palm of her hand. She couldn’t wait to press a kiss to the heated skin over it. Her hand finally reached its destination finding Damian’s cock pressing painfully against its denim confines. Her fingers glazed over the bugle pulling a moan from him and his hips rocked into her touch.

“Do you wanna hear what I added to my list?” Cassie’s words were softly whispered against his lips as she broke the kiss, but were weighed heavily with desire. The tip of her nose brushed softly over his cheek as she teased their lips meeting again.

“Tell me Corazòn,” Damian’s whispers were broken. He lifted his hand to her hip smoothing the fabric down until he was met with the perfectly soft skin of her thigh. He ran his hand down as far as he could reach before drawing his hand back up this time dipping beneath the hem of the dress to the curve of her ass. A teasing swipe of his fingers over her panty line drew a sharp inhale of breath against his cheek. His lips formed a smile even as her own fingers continued to tease his cock – hard and straining against his zipper. “What do you wanna do to my cock?”

Cassie shivered at Damian’s words. She clenched her thighs together searched for pressure to relieve the tingling between them. At the same time, her hips chased the movements on his hand on the back of her thigh and ass. His fingers dangerously close to her center. A little bit further and he’d feel the dampness of her panties. Proof of her need for him. “It involves you driving and your cock in my mouth…”

“Fuck,” Damian breathed. His gripped her ass in the palm of his hand, his fingers pressing into the meaty flesh. He lifted his head meeting her eyes. Her pupils blown with lust. Lips red and swollen.

“But I kinda also want to climb the rest of the way over this seat and sink down on your cock…” As Cassie spoke, she unfastened the button of his jeans. The zipper gave way on its own, sliding down halfway due to the pressure. Her hand dipped beneath the fabric palming his cock through his cotton briefs. Her forehead pressed into his shoulder. Her breaths heavy. His cock pulsed in her hold.

Damian’s head tilted back hitting the headrest as a litany of Spanish words and curses fell from his lips. When her hand moved to free him completely he stopped her with one of his. “Princesa, if you do that I will be ripping your panties off, dragging you over to my lap and sinking into that pretty pussy of yours.”

“That’s what I want.”

Damian groaned and nearly let her continue. “I seem to remember you wanting to sink to your knees and suck my cock. You wanted to trace my tattoos with your tongue. Sit on my face…” he ducked his head, his nose tracing an imaginary image on her cheek as his breath ghosted over her skin. “Wanted me to come all over you. Pressing my fingers deep inside your pussy…”

“God yes,” Cassie moaned. She met his eyes. The deep dark pools pulling her in, making her weak. She dropped her eyes to his lips. That full upper lip. The bottom lip she wanted to sink her teeth in. Framed by the well groomed beard covering his chin and sharp jaw line. A shiver worked through her at the thought of its roughness moving over her skin.

Damian’s eyes grew impossibly darker as he watched the emotions flickering across Cassie’s face. He had to squeeze their hands around his cock when her tongue poked through her lips to trail along her bottom lip. “Corazòn, get out of this car now.”

Cassie’s eyes flared. Damian’s eyes were nearly black and she shivered. She slipped back into her seat and reached for the door handle pushing it open. The cold air rushing in felt heavenly against her heated body. After climbing from the car, she tugged her dress down smoothing it over her ass.

“This dress… I probably showed my ass to anyone around.”

“No one around but me Corazòn,” Damian took her hand, threading their fingers together.

They walked through the parking lot, weaving through the vehicles toward the front door. The doors slid open as they approached. The lobby silent in the late hour. The woman at the front desk never even raised her head. No doubt bored, scrolling on her phone.

The elevator opened immediately when Damian pressed the button. When they stepped on, he hit the button to close the door breathing a little sigh of relief when no one yelled out to hold the door. “What floor Corazòn?”

“Six.”

When the doors opened to the sixth floor, Cassie pulled him off the elevator by her hand still encased in his. She stopped at her door about halfway down the hall. With her purse on her shoulder with Damian’s jacket on over it, she had to pull her arm through the sleeve to free her purse. Dropping his hand, she held her purse in one hand and pulled the zipper open with the other. Rifling through the menial contents, it still took her a lot longer than it should to find her room key.

It didn’t help that Damian crowded behind her. His hands on her hips and sliding up to her waist underneath his jacket. Then his right hand left her body and reappeared at her neck where he brushed the hair off her neck. His jacket fell off her shoulder now that it was released from her arm. When his lips touched her skin her eyes drifted closed and she shivered. She swayed on her feet, her legs threatening to give out.

“The door Cassandra…” Damian murmured in her ear.

“Shit,” she breathed as she leaned back against him. The back of her head rested on his clavicle. His lips ghosting over her neck, as he pressed wet, open mouthed kisses on the skin. “That shouldn’t affect me that.” She wished for a a different style of dress at the moment. Maybe a strapless, corset style to completely bare her shoulders and neck to his wandering lips.

Damian’s fingers spread out over her stomach, the fabric soft beneath his palm. A slight press and they were touching. Her back to his chest. His hard cock to the swell of her ass. His lips still pressed kisses up and down her neck; ghosting touches that caused her breath to hitch and tiny little tremors. He lifted his right arm and trailed down the smooth leather of his jacket until he reached her hand where clasped in her fingers was the room key. Lifting their hands together, he held the card over the pad on the door.

The click of the lock disengaging caused a tiny tremor of his own to take over his body; for beyond the closed door promised Heaven. Sweet ecstasy he only previously thought about at night when he was alone with his intrusive thoughts. When he wasn’t strong enough to block out the wanton whispered begging. To block out the taste and feel of her lips.

He stumbled forward when Cassie, apparently more with it than he, pushed the handle down and opened the door. He recovered quickly to enter the room. The door clicked shut behind them

“I’ve dreamed about this…”

His response was stolen when she spun around and kissed him. A desperate kiss that mirrored his own. His hands gripped her ass, fingerings digging in as he pressed her against his hard cock. He swallowed the moan the movement made. His tongue was demanding as it invaded her mouth dueling with hers.

A quick move had his leather jacket falling to the floor along with her purse. Her hands clutched at him trying to get closer to his body. She squirmed feeling his cock pressing against her belly. Her pussy throbbed, begging to be filled. Her fingers gripped his hair as she stood on tip toes. Then she was floated as he picked her up with his hands on her thighs. Her legs wrapped around his waist and the kiss broke on a moan when her back hit the wall.

“Sorry,” Damian whispered against her lips, breaths coming out heavily. He pressed into her, his hard cock right at the juncture of her thighs. His hands roamed freely. Up her bare thighs pushing that black dress up to her hips. Over her stomach and up her chest where he cupped her breasts. Kneading gently as his thumbs brushed over hidden nipples until they peddled under his touch. His hands ran up her neck feeling her pulse beating wildly where they cupped her face drawing her back to his. Their lips met again in a searing kiss and it was his turn to moan when her teeth sunk into his bottom lip.

“Let me suck your cock,” Cassie breathed. Her body pulsated with need. Her mind tunneled down to Damian and Damian alone. Nothing else mattered. She wanted him – needed him more than she needed her next breath. “Please…”

“You beg so prettily…” Damian murmured running a light touch of his finger down the side of her cheek. His thumb ran over her bottom lip. He groaned when her tongue dipped out and teased the pad of his thumb.

“I’m actually about to become quite feral. I need you so much…”

“Fuck Corazòn,” he ducked his head into neck and breathed. Her perfume consumed him. Once a tremor worked through him, he lifted his head to meet her eyes. “Those words haunted me since Boston. I wake up with those words whispered in my ear. The feel of your mouth wrapped around me…”

He took a step back, letting her slide down his body until her feet touched the floor.

Cassie’s hands ran down his massive chest. She pressed a kiss over his heart. Her fingers toyed with the hem of his black t-shirt dipping beneath to find warm skin. The muscles rippled beneath her touch as she trailed her fingers along his stomach and the waistband of his jeans. A ghosting palm over his zipper drew a moan from his lips.

She pushed her hands beneath his shirt. As she moved up his hard chest, she moved his shirt with her hands baring his chest to her. Once her eyes caught skin she leaned down and pressed her lips to it. She kissed up the center of his chest, relishing in every hard breath she drew just from her kisses.

“Cassie…” Damian breathed and reached for his shirt rolled up into his armpits. He gripped the bunched material and pulled it up over his head. His head dropped back and his eyes closed as he lost himself to the feeling of her lips on him. He groaned when her tongue swiped over his nipple, drawing it into a stiff peak.

Cassie wanted to continue exploring every inch of his chest. Teasing his nipples with her tongue and sharp bites. Running her tongue over the tattoos sitting on each of his pecs. Tracing all the dips, lines, and ridges of muscles with her fingers and her tongue sucking little marks into the skin. That would come later. The thought caused her pussy to throb. Having him laying down on the bed, completely naked. Straddling his waist. Leaning down over him. Her hair hanging down tickling his skin as she mapped his body and committed it to memory.

“There’s so much I want…” God she wanted it all right now but for now she settled for sinking to her knees on the carpeted hotel room floor. Up on her knees she leaned forward and did what she told him she wanted to do back in Boston. Her lips pressed on the rough woven cotton twill feeling the hard ridge. She mouthed his hard length, listening to the soft moans falling from Damian’s lips. She placed a kiss to his stomach as she worked the button of his jeans open and lowered the zipper.

The sides parted revealing the black fabric of his boxers. Her fingers dug into the open flaps of his jeans as she leaned forward to mouth his cock. She moaned tasting the small circle of wet fabric where pre come had leaked. Her core quivered with each breath she breathed. The heady musky scent caused her mouth the water. She continued to mouth his cock through his boxers, finding the tip and drawing it into her mouth.

“Cassie…” Damian moaned. His shoulders hit the wall behind him as his legs weakened. He threaded his fingers through her hair. The strands tightened around his fingers when his fist hardened. “Let me in your mouth Corazòn…”

Cassie reached for his briefs and with the help of his free hand, pulled them down far enough to finally bare his cock to her. She moaned at the sight. Beautifully hard and tanned. A vein running up the underside. The mushroomed head glistening with a drop of come. She wasted no time in leaning forward. Her tongue licked up that pearl of come and she moaned as the salty, tangy flavor burst on her tongue.

His cock was hot in her hand when she wrapped it around the base. A squeeze drew a moan from Damian’s lips and she had an image of working him with her hand and swallowing his moans with her lips as she kissed him. Her pussy pulsed at the thought. Fluttering in quick movements and she wanted to press her own fingers inside her slick channel. That’s not what she wanted. She wanted him. His tongue. His fingers. His cock…

More Spanish curses dropped from Damian’s mouth when Cassie’s lips closed around the tip of his cock. Her tongue swirled over the head, teasing that tiny little pucker of skin on the underside of his head at the shaft. His cock throbbed in her tight hold. The hand not moving, simply holding him steady as she worked his tip.

Slowly she started to sink down, taking more and more of his length inside her mouth. Her tongue continued to stroke and tease at the vein in the underside, drawing delicious deeps breathy moans from Damian. Her lips stretched around his girth and her jaw ached. When her lips met her hand, she released her fingers and grabbed his hips for balance as she continued to swallow more of his smooth length.

“Ah fuck Corazòn,” Damian groaned when her nose pressed against the skin at the base of his cock completely free of pubic hair as he kept himself clean shaven. “You take me so good.” He pressed a thumb against one of his hollowed cheeks.

She pulled off him until her hand was able to grasp him once more. The shaft wet now from her saliva. With a tight grip she began to move up and down. Just short movements up to meet where her mouth still wrapped around him.

Mouthing the tip she let saliva fall from her lips to his cock. Her hand moved up and down the entire length collecting her spit allowing her hand to move easily as she concentrated at the tip. Working to draw more moans and Spanish words from Damian’s lips. She brought the tip to her lips, tracing lightly before licking over the tip with a flat tongue.

She took a breath and suck him back inside her mouth. His cock suctioned to the roof of his mouth. Her tongue worked the underside. Her hand worked his base again up to meet her lips and back down. Her eyes drifted up over stomach and chest to his head titled back against the wall so she could only see the prominent Adam’s apple and the sharp jawline.

Her left hand which had been gripping his thigh dipped to glaze over his balls. His cock pulsed at the touch, feeling it expand in her hand and mouth. She moaned around his length before releasing him from her mouth again. This time she ducked her hand and mouthed at his balls. She swiped her tongue over the loose, wrinkled pouch before drawing one side into her mouth. She gently moved the ball around before releasing it and doing the same to the other. With a lick up the center, she moved her hand to continue to lick up his entire length before swallowing his head once again.

She bobbed her head on his length faster, feeling his hips starting to rock into her. She worshipped his cock with her mouth and hand. A wince crossed her features when Damian’s hand squeezed a little too hard in her hair. Then it was used to pull her away as his hips moved back. His cock fell from her lips leaving a string of spit from her lips to the tip. Using her hand to wipe her lips, she looked up and nearly came at the look in Damian’s eyes as he stared at her.

“I don’t care what item you want to cross off that list Corazòn, but it better be one with my cock in your pussy right now.” Damian’s voice was deeper than she’s heard before. Her body trembled with anticipation as more of her heat soaked her panties. He guided her back to her feet with the hand in her hair and their lips collided. His tongue licked into her mouth as he turned them around pressing her into the wall he’d just been using to stay on his feet as she sucked him.

“Right here,” she breathed against his lips. Her hands moving across his skin and over his shoulder to around his neck. She pressed against him and lifted her knee against his thigh. He rewarded her by lifting her once again and she locked her legs around him. Thighs squeezing his waist. “Damian,” she cupped his face and touched their foreheads together. Their breaths mixing.

He gripped her hips pressing his cock against her covered center. “Condom?” His were in his toiletry kit all the way in his room, two floors up. The days of carrying one his in wallet were long gone as he moved on from random meaningless hookups years ago.

“Don’t need,” Cassie kissed the corner of his mouth as her hands moved down his shoulders and across his chest up his neck to his back. She rocked her hips against him, feeling his cock right where she needed him. “I’m safe. Protected.” She kissed his lips with each word. “I wanna feel you. Nothing between us.”

Damian’s eyes heated at the thought of slipping inside of her warm wet heat with nothing between them. His head hit her shoulder as he shivered. His hands moved over her hips and the bunched dress. Running up under the fabric his hands met the soft cotton of her panties. He gripped the fabric at her hip in one hand. His muscles rippled and bulged as he gave a sharp yank. The sound of fabric ripping echoed through the room.

The shredded fabric fell from his hand and his fingers moved to her center, guided by the heat. He slid between her folds and moaned at the amount of wetness he found. He leaned the upper part of his body back and was able to send two fingers deep inside her. Their moans mixed at the intrusion. “You’re so wet for me Corazòn.”

“Since you scared that guy away at the bar…” Cassie breathed, rocking her hips into his fingers. Her fingers clutched at his shoulders as she pressed her shoulders into the wall to help with her leverage. “Standing there looking all dark and threatening… ready to take him out for me…you could have taken me right then.”

“You’re mine,” Damian growled feeling a tinge of the anger he felt earlier seeing Cassie trapped against the bar returning.

“Yours,” Cassie echoed. Her right hand drifted to the back of his neck, tangling in his braids. Her fingernails gently scraping the skin at his nape. “So take me.”

Damian withdrew his fingers and wrapped his hand around his cock. He gave a couple short strokes in the confined space before lining up with her opening. Another line of Spanish - dirty words that sounded like a prayer fell from his lips as he sank into her. She clenched around him, greedily pulling him in.

“God Damian…”

A full body shudder worked through him when he reached the hilt; completely buried inside of her. Finally. His forehead rested against hers and breathed deeply trying to get his body under control. Her hands came up to cup his jaw and he kissed her.

A dirty, open mouthed kiss full of tongue. Long dueling strokes drawing moans causing muscles to tighten and fingers to clench.

Damian looked down as he pulled back, watching as he exited her body, his cock coated with her juices. With her legs locked around him he didn’t have a lot of movement. Their height difference made the position a little difficult. He pushed back in drawing a moan from her. His hands slipped down to cup her ass and he moved closer, crowding against her.

“Fuck me Damian,” Cassie whispered. The position left her vulnerable. She didn’t have the ability to move and could barely rock herself onto Damian’s cock. She was dependent on him.

“Te entendí Corazòn,” Damian answered dropping his lips back to hers. He pulled out and snapped his hips back in drawing another moan. “I got you,” he whispered.

The rhythm remained steady. His hips moving in and out. He could feel her thighs tightening around him as she tried to move against him. Her hands clutched at his shoulders. His body the only thing holding her up.

“Damian,” she breathed. Her hand tangled in his hair again pulling her head to him. She ran her tongue over his ear tracing the shell. She drew the lobe between her teeth nibbling slightly.

Damian groaned and turned his head toward her to kiss her again. As he kissed her, he slid his hands up her legs toward her knees before dipping to the inside of her thighs. Her hands once against clutched at him. “I got you Corazòn,” he whispered but he slowed to a stop seated deep inside of her. Using his hips as leverage, he continued to move his hands down the insides of her thighs. “Unhook your legs…”

When she uncrossed her thighs he was able to get his arms underneath. He hook her thighs, his forearms under her knees. His hands back on the soft globes of her ass. The position opened her up wider and he swore he sunk deeper. “Hold on.”

The newish position allowed him to slap against her clit with each snap of his hips. She moaned loudly and dug her fingers into his shoulders. She arched her back trying to angle her hips to increase the pleasure shooting through her. Her head hit the ball behind her and she gasped when Damian’s teeth sank into the curve of her neck. “Damian,” she chanted his name. Her hands ran over his skin covered by a sheen layer of sweat.

“You feel so good in my cock, Corazòn,” Damian murmured into her ear. He felt her shiver and her pussy clenching around him. His fingers dug into her ass using the leverage to pull her back to slam onto him. Her hands continuously touched him, leaving a fire in their wake. There were light ghosting touches and firm swipes of her hand. Nails piercing into his skin accompanied by the tightening of her walls around him.

“I’m gonna come,” Cassie whispered, the feeling coming out of nowhere. The tension coiling deep in her stomach. Goosebumps rose across her body. Pleasure swelled. Her fingers gripped his shoulders and she slid one hand back to his hair where she used it to guide his lips back to hers. Her lips parted allowing his tongue to enter her mouth. Desperate strokes that she broke as she moaned out his name.

“Dios Mio,” Damian leaned his forehead against the wall next to her. His thrusts intensified sliding in and out of her pussy. He pushed deeper and deeper clutching her ass mirroring his movements. His legs trembled as a sensation flooded his entire being. Like a Jack in the box’s handle being turned and turned. Each crank of the handle bringing him closer to explosion.

“Don’t stop,” Cassie pleaded.

“Never stopping,” Damian grunted, rutting into her. Their lips met again in a charged kissed. There was no finesse just a mash of lips, teeth, and tongue. “Cas…”

“Come inside me,” Cassie moaned as their kiss broke.

A harsh, guttural sound released from Damian’s mouth. “Not… until…you… come.”

Cassie’s mouth dried and her ears were filled with the sound of roaring and her blood pumped furiously through her veins. She whimpered and her eyes fluttered closed. She clenched around him and she wondered if it was a desperate attempt to keep him inside of her. Her fingers clawed at his chest leaving behind red marks in his beautiful bronzed skin.

A whisper of orgasm first appeared at the base of her spin. Slowly building, tension accumulating, invisible strands twisting and binding tighter and tighter. Then it was an explosion of euphoric pleasure ripping through her, stealing her breath.

“That’s it Corazòn,” Damian moaned as he felt her body tightened around him nearly trapping him. She shuddered in his arms as her orgasm washed over her. “Fuck fuck fuck,” he chanted the rush of her essence covering his cock as he slipped easily in and out of her. His own orgasm swelled and bubbled.

He sped up slamming his hips into her hard enough she was moaning with each slap. The corded muscles in his arms bulged and rippled as his fingers dug into her ass so hard he feared he’d leave marks.

‘I don’t have tattoos but I’d wear those marks proudly.’

The whispered words of a memory sent him over the edge. He slammed into her one final time and he came with a roar. His cock pulsed with each ejection of come deep inside her. His head tilted back to look at the ceiling but his eyes were unseeing as they clenched shut against the mix of pleasurable pain shooting through him. He hissed as her pussy clenched around him drawing another spurt of come from his cock.

His head fell to her shoulder as he slumped into her. His breath coming out heavy. His heart pounding wildly in his chest like he ran a marathon. His mind a hazy fog of post orgasmic relief. He could feel her hands on his back. Her arms cradling him to her, accepting his weight.

“No way I can give this dress back to Bianca.”

Damian laughed, his body quaking as he lifted his head. He pressed his hips into her as he shuffled a half step forward to secure her against the wall. Then he unhooked his arms from beneath her legs allowing her crossed them behind his back. The option cause him to press further into her and he moaned softly, his eyes closing.

He blinked his eyes back open and reached up to brush the hair out of her face. A smile grew in his lips as he watched her smile. A soft smile as her cheeks reddened in a blush that had his heart stumbling. Her eyes lowered until he placed a knuckle under her chin to raise it back up. “You okay?”

Cassie nodded and placed her hands on his cheeks. She guided his lips to hers. This time the kiss was much softer. Their lips moved together gently. Her hands slipped to the back of his head and she cradled him against her. The frantic lust building from the club disappeared. In its place was a calm loving.

“Hold on to me,” Damian whispered against her lips. He let his weight rest against her as he toed off his shoes. Then it was twisting and tugging to pull off Cassie’s boots. With his hands under her ass, he removed her from the wall and walked them into the bathroom. He pulled his cock from her pussy – still half hard and definitely interested in round two. Especially as he watched Cassie pull the dress up and over her head leaving her only in a black lacy bra.

He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her as he lowered his head to kiss her. The kiss lasted only a few seconds before he broke it to run his lips down her neck to her chest. He kissed the swell of her breast and licked her nipple through the lace. The fabric grew wet as he licked and sucked her nipple.

“Damian…” Cassie breathed, arching her back to send her breast into his mouth.

He switched breasts and reached behind her to unhook her bra with one hand. He lifted his head and ran his fingers down her arms as he pushed the bra straps down. When the article fell to the floor he ducked his head and sucked a nipple into his mouth. He licked and sucked gently while his hand kneaded her other breast; rolling and pinching the nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

Cassie groaned softly her head falling back. She threaded her fingers through his hair, holding him to her breast. Heat built again in her stomach. Lust rolled through her and her pussy clenched. She rubbed her thighs together against the pressure. Damian’s come dribbled from her and down the insides of her thighs.

She stepped back before she hopped up on the counter and spread her legs. “Shower first,” she told him when he shot her a questioning look. Taking the hair tie from her wrist, she gathered her hair up into a messy bun at the top of her head before pulling the curtain aside. The water was icy cold before it quickly warmed. It took only a few moments to wash her body and turn the water back off.

“You never joined me,” Cassie said, walking from the bathroom stuttering to a stop when she saw Damian laying on her bed. Stripped naked his entire body on display. Strong calves leading to thick thighs each covered in corse light brown hair. The trim waist and flat stomach with just the hint of definition. Wide chest with massive shoulders. Arms—

She gulped as her eyes stared at the tattooed covered right arm. Muscles rippling and twitching as his hand gripped his cock. Hard. Tip weeping. Come dribbling down the head to the shaft where Damian’s fingers picked it up massaging it back into his skin.

Her teeth sunk into her bottom lip as she watched -nearly in a trance- as he tugged and pulled his hard length.

“Corazòn…”

Cassie’s eyes flickered from his cock to his face. His eyes were consumed with arousal. Lids so heavy he could barely open them as he stared at her through his lashes. “Fucking hotter than I imagined…”

“Come here Corazòn.” Damian motioned her with his free hand.

“So fucking hot.” Cassie murmured as she climbed up on the bed; her knees on either side of his legs. She ran her hands up his legs to his knees. The random small tattoo of scales on the top side of his right calf drew her gaze and she leaned down, bracing herself with her left hand on the mattress. She traced the black ink with the tip of her tongue while running her hand up and down his leg. Light teasing touches.

Leaving the tattoo she continued placing kisses up his right leg over his knee before switching to his left and offering the same treatment. Nothing but soft open mouthed kisses leaving behind a hint of wetness paired with the soft tantalizing touches of her fingertips. Moving up either leg to his thighs. The coarse hair more prominent and tickled her lips.

His cock loomed in front of her. His fingers loosely wrapped around the turgid length. The movements more lazy. She bypassed it to continue placing kisses on his thighs and she settled on his knees trying to keep her weight off his legs.

She kissed the crease of his thighs, following that musky scent down toward his protruding cock. When she reached it, she lifted and did the same in the opposite side. Smiling against his skin at his moan.

“You’re such a tease,” Damian tangled his hand in her hair, his fingers squeezing the bun her hair was wrapped in. With a tug he had her moving up his body until she was straddling his waist and her lips were on his.

Cassie started undulating her hips. Her knees tucked in close against his side. His hard cock pressed between her folds providing a delicious pressure on her clit with each rocking motion of her hips. She titled her head back releasing a moan and Damian’s lips attacked her bared neck.

“Use me Princesa,” Damian peppered her neck in kisses. He ran his hands up and down her back. He gripped her hips and flexed his hips pressing his cock firmly against her. His cock pulsed at the moan Cassie emitted. “Isn’t this what you wanted? To ride me…”

Cassie hummed as she moved her hips faster. “I also wanted to trace all your tattoos with my tongue but you interrupted me…”

“I’m not stopping you,” Damian’s lips moved across her cheek back to her mouth. He took advantage of a moan, slipping his tongue between her lips. Long strokes that had her moaning into his mouth. Had her coating his cock with her creamy essence.

“Better… offer…” Cassie gasped and stopped her hips as a tiny tremor shot through her. She pressed her forehead against his chest, her body quivering with need.

She lifted her hips feeling his hands on them helping her slide down on him, taking him inside her heat inch by inch.

“Shit Corazòn,” Damian breathed as she sunk completely down on top of him. His fingers dug into her hips as he held her still. He hissed, his eyes shut as he tilted his head back in the pillow, when she clenched around him.

Full was the first thought Cassie had as she sat back. Her back arched sending her breasts popping out. Her head tossed back staring at the ceiling behind closed eyes. A delicious stretch that nearly had her whimpering. Her pussy fluttered around him, milking him. Her breath caught when she felt him flex sending his hips into her causing him to go that much deeper.

Her head fell forward, eyes catching his. She smiled and ran her hands down his chest. Her nails let behind tiny red marks that would fade before the morning light. The scratches drew soft moans as the hold he had in her hips became just the right side of painful.

She moved her hips in a circular motion first. Then back and forth rocking against him. Her hands constantly moved in his chest. Hard chest muscles to the soft skin of his stomach and back up again. Keeping her hips in motion causing soft breathy moans to fall from his lips. Her thumbs flicked his nipples on the next bypass. Then they were moving to his shoulders and down his arms. Her fingers barely touching the skin. Her hands covered his on her still gyrating hips. She pulled his hands away and entwined their fingers.

Cassie pressed their tangled fingers down onto the pillow in either side of his head. Their hips continued their dance – rocking and gyrating together. Leaning over him their eyes met. His black as coal filled with lust and desire. She imagined hers looked the same. A darker shade of green than she normally saw in the mirror. Bursting with her own desperate need for the man beneath her.

Dipping her head, her lips caught his. Conveying her desperation in the heated kiss. She felt him trying to lift his arms, but she kept him pinned. A thrill rushed through her knowing he had the power to flip them and take control. The though caused a gush of liquid at her center and she clenched tightly drawing another moan from his lips.

Moving slowly, Cassie came up off his cock rocking back down using her knees. Twin moans filled the room at the sensation. He met her motion with one of his own, coming up to met her sending his cock back deep inside of her. Their motion stayed steady. Their lips moved together. Tongues meshing with long strokes. Teeth sank into lips in sharp nips. Fingers gripped and relaxed only to grip again. Almost the same motion as their hips working together.

“Por favor dejame tocarte,” Damian whispered against her lips. “I need to touch you Corazòn…”

Cassie released his hands as she fell to her elbows. His arms immediately wrapped around her waist. Warm hands danced up her back. Her nipples, pulled taunt in arousal, rubbed lightly against his chest at their movements. Those same arms wrapped around her waist squeezing before sending his hands in motion again.

Perfectly round breasts dangled over Damian’s head; too enticing to ignore. Not that he would ever want to. His hands traveled up her back to pull her down to him at the same time his head lifted off the pillow to draw a taunt peak into his mouth. Her moan hit his ears as he suckled her. His teeth biting down hard enough to draw a moan that went straight to his cock. Still incased in that tight wet heat he never wanted to leave.

His hands ran up her back and dipped around to cup her breasts; squeezing the globes as he changed nipples. He sucked the nipple into his mouth as he worked it in his hand while his other hand squeezed and rolled her free nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

She continued to rock against him. Her breaths coming out in gasps against his ministrations. His hands left her breasts to trail to her back and down cupping the globes of her ass. His fingers dug into the meaty flesh pulling the cheeks apart.

Her body shifted on top of him and suddenly the strokes got longer. She was pulling herself further off his cock to sink back on. He released her nipple from his mouth and moaned. His arms tightened around her waist and his hips rocked up into her. His coming up off the bed in order to fully penetrate her.

Cassie’s lips attached to his neck and if he had half a thought left in his brain that wasn’t completely focused on her, Damian would have told her to be easy. He didn’t need a hickey. However he was consumed by the feel, touch, and taste of her. He simply cocked his head to give her better access.

A hand on her ass. The other across her back resting on her shoulder. He held her body to him. Her breasts pressed against his chest. He braced his heels into the mattress to better leverage his hips. Up and into her center. The slap of skin joining the soft moans. The smell of sex heavy in the room.

Their mouths met again. Filled with heat. Damian’s hand run up her back to tangle in her hair. The strands falling from the messy updo from the shower. With a yank, the mess of brown curls fell like a curtain around his head. The outside world was gone and it was just them.

“Damian,” Cassie whispered as she pushed herself up with a moan. He sank back into her as she fully seated herself on him. Then slowly she started rocking on him; working her hips back and forth. Side to side. In circles. All of them. Any motion. The pads of her fingers dug into his chest. Her head tossed back. Hair raining down her back; long tresses tickling the curve of her ass. Her mouth opened on a moan. The movements of her hips stimulating her clit against Damian’s pubic bone.

“Fuck yeah,” Damian breathed. His hands fells to her hips helping her movements as she chased her orgasm. Using him. His cock pulsed, plumping at the thought. Eyes heavy with desire, he stared at her through his lashes. Perched on top of him taking what she wanted.

‘I wanna ride you to completion…’

“Ride me Corazòn,” Damian murmured. He could feel his own orgasm building and he struggled to hold it off. He wanted this for her. For him. Fuck it was hot.

“Damian…” Cassie whispered moving faster. Her rhythm faltered as she became desperate chasing that euphoric bright light.

“That’s it, Princesa…” his fingers dug into her hips. With a tightening of his ass, he flexed his hips, hardened his lower abs providing more stimulation. He was rewarded with a soft cry. “Ride my cock. Take what you need. Dios Mio Cas, you feel so good. You’re gripping me so hard. So tight.”

“Dame…” His name came out in nearly a whine. Warmth covered her entire body. Her movements were nearly frantic. Tingling started in her fingers and toes working its way up each extremity. Little bolts of electricity causing her body to twitch. A low moan escaped as the firings all converge deep in her belly. Coiling tighter and tighter. “Oh…”

“Come on Corazòn… give it to me…Come on my cock…Fuck…” Damian moaned, gripping her hips as Cassie’s orgasm tore through her. She clenched around him like a vice and his eyes nearly rolled back. He fought to keep them on her face to watch the pleasure crossing her features. She slumped forward and he was waiting. He wrapped his arms around her cradling her to his chest as tremors zapped her body. “Fuck…” he breathed in her ear; his hands moving in light touches up and down her back. “That was so hot Corazòn. When I’m alone in my hotel room next week, this is what I’m gonna picture when I’m stroking my cock. You above me. Riding my cock. Your pussy griping me so tight… those breathy little moans. They way you bit your lip…”

“You better FaceTime me whenever you find your cock in your hand and I’m not around,” Cassie murmured and used one hand to push slightly off his body. Enough so she could look down at him. Their eyes met. Damian’s still full of want. Tinged with a desperation she felt only a few moments before. Liquid heat poured from her center and she clenched at the look in his eyes. Warmth settling over her again.

Her hand cupped his face. Her forearm laying in his chest. Thumb moving across his cheek bone she leaned down and kissed him. Could feel the desperation on his lips. Could feel the tension still coursing through his body causing it to nearly vibrate. “I love you.”

Damian’s eyes flared and Cassie found herself on her back with him looming above her. Their connection still intact with his cock deep inside of her. Her eyes filled; desire overtaking her once more at the manhandling movement.

“Eres mi cielo en la tierra Corazòn,” Damian’s voice came out low and husky, laced with a type of longing he had never felt before. “I love you.”

Then he started to move. Long strokes in and out of tight wet heat. His hips snapping against her with each stroke drawing a moan from her kiss swollen lips. Desire took over and he was no longer in control. Spiraling as he slammed into her.

“Damian…” Cassie moaned. She could do nothing but hang on. Her hands struggling to find purchase on his sweat slicked skin. His hot breath ghosted across her skin as he breathed heavily. She tangled one of her hands in his hair and brought his lips to hers.

The kiss was messy. An uncoordinated meeting of lips and over zealous tongues. Desperately dueling and mating. Each stroke building toward complete and utter destruction.

“Roll me over…” Cassie pleaded between kisses.

Damian withdrew and helped Cassie turn over. Barely waiting for her to be set before he slammed back into her. A yelp broke through his desire ridden haze and he slowed to a stop. “Sorry I…”

“Keep going…” Cassie clenched the sheets below her in tight fists. She dropped her belly and popped her ass. Her knees spread on either side of Damian’s. “Fuck me Damian.”

‘Take what you need…’

He was unleashed.

Damian’s hands gripped her hips, holding her steady as he pounded into her. That sweet silky cavern welcoming him. Clenching around him in desperate measures to keep him deep inside her. The smell of her arousal permeated the room and his mouth watered. He wanted to pull his cock out and bury his tongue deep inside her licking until she exploded and her essence covered his tongue, lips, and chin.

A gun to his head couldn’t get him to pull out.

“Cassie,” he groaned. A hand shifting off her hip and up her back feeling every vertebra in her spine until his fingers unfurled and spread between her shoulder blades. He pushed her into the mattress changing the angle of his strokes hitting the spot inside her that caused her to cry out. “Fuck yes,” he growled. “Come for me again Corazòn. I want it all.”

Tears leaked from the corner of her eyes. Not in pain. Oh no. She was riding on a wave of complete pleasure. Higher and higher into the sky. He hit her g-spot on every stroke send a current though her body until she was trembling uncontrollably. The build was nothing like she ever felt before. Her vision started to grey around the edges.

“Damian…”

“Give it to me. Now Cassie.”

With a wail pulled from somewhere she’d never known before, an orgasm ripped through her. Her pussy convulsed as a flood of liquid coated his cock and her thighs.

“Fuck…” Damian continued to fuck Cassie through her orgasm trying to hold off but it was impossible. She pulled him right over the edge with her. With a roar he slammed into her as his cock exploded. His vision whited out as a white-hot pleasure consumed him. Blood roared in his ears. Every muscle in his body seized. A short cry fell from his lips with each twitch of his cock as it released rope after rope of come deep inside her. His chest heaved, his lungs on fire. His heart beat frantically in his chest and he was certain he was dying.

‘What a way to go…’

Everything came back online at once. His vision cleared revealing the hotel room cast in the amber glow of the bedside lamp on its lowest brightness setting. His ears popped and he could hear the ding of the elevator arriving nearly half way down the hall. A schnick of a door closing somewhere on their floor. The low hum of the mini fridge. An electrical charge still ran through his body causing a tingling hum. Like he’d been using a weed-eater.

As his brain caught up, he noticed his hand still on Cassie’s shoulders and he quickly released it. His fingers traced random patterns on her back. The touch heightened by the vibrations in his body. Her body twitched. Little tiny tremors as muscles worked through the after shocks.

He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her shoulder. A soft ghosting touch of his lips. He watched goosebumps break out as his breath danced over her skin.

The position gave him access to the bedside table where he placed the damp wash cloth he used to clean up after their earlier bout. With it in his hand, he withdrew causing two twin moans. He watched as his come leaked from Cassie’s swollen pussy. His cock gave a valiant effort to feign interest but he was spent. He wiped her gently before climbing from the bed. His legs shook reminding him of a newborn horse.

“Shower…” he ran his fingers up the edge of her back. He smiled as she groaned and turned her head to face him. He brushed the hair from her face and leaned down to kiss her.

With a groan and quivering limbs, Cassie stood and followed Damian into the bathroom. They showered quickly. As Cassie dried her hair, Damian pulled the covers back. He picked up his jacket from the floor inside the door and wrapped it around the chair at the desk. He placed her purse on the table. Withdrawing her phone, he plugged it in to the cord dangling on the bedside table. His jeans were tossed over the chair and his jacket after he placed his wallet next to her purse. He put his phone next to hers and wished he had his charger.

All thoughts of going back to his room to grab his things died when she stepped from the bathroom naked.

“Rhea might have to drive tomorrow after all,” Cassie said as she moved back into the bedroom. “A couple more rounds like that will definitely kill me.”

Damian chuckled, preening a little at her words. “I’ll drive.”

Cassie stared at him, eyes hopeful. “To Cleveland tomorrow? Aren’t you flying home?”

Damian came to a stop in front of her. He cupped her cheek and titled her head up. “That was before you ambushed me.”

“Ambushed or put us out of our misery?”

“Both.” Damian slipped an arm around her back, pulling her to his body. “But I’m glad you did.”

Cassie smile and palmed his cheeks with both of her hands. She kissed him lightly. “Me too.”

They released each other and crawled into bed. Cassie turned the light off before rolling over to curl into Damian’s side. Her head on his chest. His heart beat in her ear. His breath teasing the little fly aways of her hair.

“Next time I get drunk and tell you what I want to do to you, you’ll indulge me?”

Damian’s chuckled reverberated in her ear. “Hundred percent Corazòn.”

“That’s what I saved my name as in your phone,” Cassie’s voice softened with sleep as her eyes grew heavy. Warmness settled over her.

“Perfect.” Damian pressed a kiss into her hair. His hand came up to settle on hers resting on his chest.

“Hey Damian?”

Damian hummed in response as his body sunk into the mattress; lulled to an almost sleep state by the warm covers and an even warmer body snuggled against his side.

“I love you.”

“Love you too Corazòn.”

[chefbuck]

i hold one card that i can't use

aka 8.08 coda fic, wc: 1.4k

--

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. It’s wasn’t supposed to be this long. But then a week passed. And then another, and another and suddenly months have accumulated and the Diaz household has never felt so boney. And Buck watched his best friend wilt away as the days went by. 

But then— Then Eddie answered the door pantsless and although something inside Buck slumps at the sight of no mustache, for the first time in months Eddie looks lighter. He looks like he’s finally breathing again. And how could Buck feel anything but relief?

And yes, Tommy. Tommy is just another dot on the list of people who have seen Buck and not found him good enough to stick around for. Its— Its—

Buck’s still processing. 

Whatever. He’s doing his damnedest not to backslide because healthy coping is part of his new regimen and he’s focused on centering his feelings and frustrations into baking things for his loved ones who actually stick around. 

He’s just finishing handing over a basket of banana nut loaf and chocolate chip cookies and breakfast scones into Eddie’s hands when he tells him he’s moving to Texas. And Buck is- Maddie. Abby. Alli. Taylor. Maddie. Eddie. Tommy. 

Buck is fine. Buck is fine because he’s plastering a smile up on his face to show just how fine he is and holding the tablet in his hands, ready to help out. And if he holds it in front of him like a shield and tightens it to his chest to send a message from his heart through the device to tell Chris to just come home, he can still be mad as long as he comes home, then that’s between Buck and Eddie’s trusty iPad. 

So Buck sits with him on the couch and tries not to think about the last time they did that. (Tommy wound still fresh, Eddie beautiful under the glow of his own joy. Now, Buck pretending it doesn’t hurt and Eddie, last straw and everything.) Buck sits with him on the couch and helps him out with the terrible nightmare that is house (and apartment, Buck somehow managed to convince him with a few accessible options he found) hunting and he sits in with meetings with realtors because he’s nothing if not thorough. When his presence confuses them a bit, then that’s just karma for number three on the bullet list. But Buck helps Eddie in everyway he can to find the best place for him, even though Buck himself will never step foot inside. 

(Because Buck doesn’t want Eddie to move, are you kidding? Of course he doesn’t want Eddie to move, but what is he supposed to do? Tell him not to go and be with his son? Like hell he is. So if Buck has to rip his heart out of his chest and help it leave him just for the sake of Eddie and Chris together again, he would do it. He would do it a million times over.)

When Eddie tells him over and over that Buck didn’t really have to do all that Buck will smile and say I know. He never has to do anything for the Diazes. He does it because he wants to. 

-

“Okay, and you got the address of the place, right?” 

“Yes, Eddie,” except with the smile Buck puts on his face the tone comes out more like yes, dear, and Buck tries very hard to keep his composure. Both hands on the wheel now, and if Eddie looked over he would see it clear as day that Buck is barely holding it together. Thankfully, for Buck, Eddie is determined to look anywhere but at him. 

“Right, okay. And you have everyone’s numbers just in case of emergency? Not that you should need it but I know you like to have that.” 

Buck nods his head, like a bobble doll. “Saved in my phone.” Buck wishes he was a bobble doll. That way he could fit in Eddie’s carry on and take him with him and Eddie could put him high on a shelf and watch over his boys just to make sure they’re safe no matter what. 

“And, shit, did I forget my charger?” Eddie’s turning around in his seat, rummaging through the glove compartment, and center console storage for anything he could have left behind. 

“It’s in the front pocket of your bag.” Buck pulls into park. They’re here. He doesn’t feel like throwing up. “Eddie,” Buck turns his head to look at Eddie, and finally he looks at him. “It’s gonna be fine. 

Eddie holds his gaze and lets out a breath. The wild look in his eyes doesn’t dissipate. “Yeah. You’re right. Fine.” His smile doesnt reach his eyes. He looks tired. 

Buck sticks his tongue out just between his lips, like he does when he’s gearing up to say something, but all he comes up with is, “I’ll grab your bag.” 

Buck’s unlocking the doors and unbuckling his seating and grabbing Eddie’s bag from the back. It’s a miracle Buck’s knees dont buckle underneath him from the short walk to his driver seat to the truck of his jeep. The last time the Diazes used this suitcase it was to fit both Eddie and Chris’ belongings for a week and a half trip to visit Eddie’s sisters. This time, it’s filled to the brim with just Eddie, since none of them know how long he’ll be gone. 

Buck’s not brave. You’d think he would be with his job and the daring stunts he pulls. But his feet are planted to the asphalt and so instead of meeting Eddie at the passenger side, Eddie has to come to him and Buck just hands over the suitcase. They’re not exactly in front of the doors that enter to the terminal but the feelings just the same. 

Eddie stands in front of him finally, and he must be fucking nervous for his flight because he looks as pale as Buck feels. He’s on the curb so he’s basically the same height as Buck but he stands so far from him, a whole two steps away. 801.6 miles is going to kill him. (Buck first googled the distance when Chris left and he would recite the number in his head, because they say getting to know something makes it less scary. Except the number stayed just as big and Chris stayed just as distant.) 

He clears his throat. “Here you go.” 

Eddie takes the handle from Buck and their fingers brush just a bit. One last time.  

Buck’s not brave. He can’t will his feet to walk Eddie to the airport glass doors because the last time he did that for someone they didn’t return until they both long moved on. Buck doesn’t think he can survive a do-over of that. Not that it’s the same thing. Eddie’s not his girlfriend. Although he does—

Eddie doesn’t say anything so Buck says, “I’ll, um, I’ll be sure to check, check in on your place every few weeks to make sure everything’s okay. And the mail, do you want me to, to forward you your mail?” Pebbles are making their home in Buck’s throat. 

“Oh, um. I hadn’t really thought of that.” Eddie’s voice sounds small. 

Buck waves him off. Right, no need to stress the guy out even more. “That’s okay, I’ll figure it out.”

“Buck-”

There’s so much he wants to say to Eddie. He wants to tell him that Manta Rays are highly intelligent and the markings of their underside are specific to each one of them. He wants to tell him about the new frog exhibit at the aquarium next week. He wants to tell him about how C shift started a rumor Adrien might be pregnant due to the five missed shifts, but it’s really because she’s fighting off a nasty flu. He wants to ask Eddie to take him with even though it’s not possible and Buck doesn’t even want to go, he just wants his boys here. 

But because Buck’s brain and body hate him he doesn’t say any of those things. Instead he blurts, “Are you coming back?” He’s wincing immediately because now he’s jinxed it.

Eddie almost looks surprised and then soft, “Of course.” 

It’s more than Abby ever gave him. It’s a verbal, solid answer. It’s words in the air that Buck could catch in his hand if he jumps at the right time. Because Buck and Eddie are so much different than Buck and Abby ever were (he doesn’t think it’s polite to compare but he almost wants to say better?). And it’s not that he doesn’t trust Eddie or thinks he would ever lie to him, because he wouldn’t. It’s just Buck doesn’t trust his ability to convince the people he loves to stick around. 

[creatura-theanarchist]

My strangest fixation I think is my passion for fruit flavours being used in more complex desserts/treats.

And so I will make a list of my personal top 10 common fruit flavours in sweets

Some ground rules before beginning:

I am not here to gatekeep what a "Dessert" is. No matter the size, if it's a sweet, it's eligible for consideration, from bountiful strawberry shortcakes to a small lemon candy, it's all up for grabs.

On that note, every ranking will take into account the 3 most common types of desserts there are:

- Baked Goods - Anything that tends to use dough or a sort of baking method to it.

- Chocolates - You know those bars of chocolate that have nuts and berries in them? Yeah, those count.

- Frozen Treats - Sorbet, Ice Cream, Ice Lollies, if it's best served from a freezer, it belongs in this category.

Of course there will be some intersection between these categories, and thusly they will be considered as both.

Also, I'm not gonna be too persnickety about the differences between a fruit or a berry. If it's widely considered a fruit, I'm putting it in the list because this Capitalist environment rarely actually cares about science and casually cherry-picks data for its purposes... so therefore cherry flavours are up for grabs.

And finally, I'm not gonna get every fruit flavour ever, because if I were, I'd have to talk about Dragon Fruit flavoured things and I'm pretty sure that would send me into a manic state of babbling so deadly it would bring Ragnarök.

10 - Banana

Now I'm gonna be real, this one hurts. I'm an avid defender of Banana flavoured sweets, specifically hard candies and such. I get excited when I see there's banana flavoured sweets!!! But unfortunately... Banana is just such a muted flavour that it's really hard to incorporate into most desserts. So, out of artistic integrity, I have to put it up here... I'm sorry I failed you, friend.......

9 - Apple

Now don't get me wrong, apple in Baked Goods is the fucking bomb, especially when spiced with shit like cinnamon or in Apple Pie. The reason it's up here is that... in the other two categories, it's barely a thing, and that's fair! The core flavour of an apple is a range of sweetness and tartness that is mild with a slightly acidic undertone, how do you transform that into a sweet treat flavour in Chocolates or Frozen Treats??? Do you want to have fucking whole apple slices while monching on a chocolate bar??? Or how about frozen chunks of solid apple in your ice lollie? It's just not easy to incorporate, but, it's easy to make taste bomb when in situations where it can easily be spiced and baked, so, it's up here.

8 - Lemon

Now, me, personally, I prefer my desserts sweet. I understand some people like a sour kick to their candies and treats, and that's allowed and respectable, like preferring to dunk Hot Sauce on things. I'm not about that life, though. So, I must admit that Lemons just don't do it for me. I will admit, sometimes lemon flavours can go hard, specifically in Frozen Treat type desserts and sometimes in Baked Goods, but also, I find it's rare for me to fully enjoy that experience personally. I will say the best experience I had with a Lemon flavour in a sweet is when I had these Lemon Sandwich Cookies that seemed to hit a just right balance of decadent creamy sweetness and a sour kick that was just enough for my sour avoidant ass. But on the whole, they get to be a tier above Apple for being more widely used but still low in the list for me generally not finding them too enjoyable.

7 - Berries

Now when I say Berries, I am clumping together things like Raspberries, Blueberries and Cranberries, because in all honesty, they're all the same to me. They're mildly sweet with a tart undertone, and the only difference is the amount of tartness. They also are all known for being small weens that need to be packed and spread throughout a dessert if you hope to get even a fraction of their full flavour spread throughout the whole dessert. Now I talk a lot of shit but in all honesty, berries are good and I do tend to enjoy them in all of the previously mentioned Dessert Forms, but also, I wouldn't say they go "hard", but they go... rigidly mid, y'know? And while there's nothing wrong with that on it's own, it's just that if there's anything else on the table, I'm usually gonna leave these berry flavoured things for last, y'know? Berries don't have a clear ability to do best in one form, and there's definetly strength in being a Jack of all trades Master of none, but, unfortunately it does keep them low on the list.

6 - Cherry

Cherry is similar to Apple in that it's not used commonly, but its reasons for that are similar to Berries. Too small to use commonly in bigger desserts, but the reason they're ranked above Berries is because I respect them more. Cherries are known to be MUCH more tart than most other berries, and frankly I respect them for dedicating themselves to be a low barrier of entry for sour noobs like me but still packing a decent punch. I will also say that Cherries go fucking hard on Chocolates and Frozen Treats, don't lie to me when you see a chocolate bar has chunks of Cherry in it you get hella excited. So, for being a direct improvement over most berries, it gets to be a rank above.

5 - Pineapple

This is where writing this ranking got hard, as all of these last 5 are flavours I get think can genuinely work in nearly any form they're introduced in, or at least perform well enough to pass. Pineapple is... definetly the crossing point between the rest of the list and that area however. Pineapple is known for being delightfully sweet while simultaneously having extremely tart and even sour tones within it's flesh. And I would never say it's ok to put whole chunks of Pineapple in a Chocolate... however... I did once have a chocolate that have a Chocolate Cake with chunks of Pineapple in it... and ngl... it was hella good. The delicately sweet fattiness of the chocolate mixing on my taste buds with the Sweet and Sour tones of the Pineapple made for a SURPRISINGLY delightful experience that I absolutely SCARFED down. I understand it's not a common taste, but honestly, I think just for that experience, this flavour was saved from being Number 8, and I think that's worth something.

4 - Strawberry

The Og. You can't go wrong with this flavour!... or can you? I'd like to say that Strawberry, while deserving of it's placement in society as one of the 3 core dessert flavours alongside Chocolate and Vanilla, I will say it's a tad overhyped. This isn't to say it's bad, but moreso... I've never met anyone over the age of 13 who said that Strawberry is their favourite flavour, and I think this is for a very good reason. It is the Everyman of Fruit Flavours. Another Jack of all trades except this one is sure as hell an absolute unit of domination. If something is Strawberry flavoured, that IS its marketing, it's the forefront flavour.

3 - Mango

Now to be clear, Mango is a RARE flavour... but everytime I find it, IT DOESN'T MESS AROUND. I've established by now I think that I value decadent sweetness in my desserts, and nothing does it quite like Mango. Mango is KNOWN for being sickeningly sweet, and whenever it comes to the party, that's the energy it's bringing. Delightful in Mango Cream Donuts, I once had a Chocolate with dried Mango chunks in it and it was BOMB, and have you ever had Mango soft serve??? Delicious, Decadent, the height of luxury. She's a bougie bitch, and she deserves the world.

2 - Peach

If Mango is from the city of Sweetness and dined of Sugar Caviar and ate Rose Gold Leaf covered steaks, Peach grew up on a farm wrangling Cream Cattle and... shoveling... gummy hay- Ok this metaphor fell apart quickly- To put my point simply, Mango's sweetness feels artificial and sickening, meanwhile Peach's sweetness is homegrown, comforting, like a hug from an elderly woman who calls you "Dearie". The Flavour of Peach is so universal it works nearly everywhere, and she DESERVES it. Frankly I feel I barely need to continue my point. She's an angel... and she deserves to be recognized for it...

1 - Orange

Orange, I feel, among the Judas' I surround myself with, is a contentious pick for Number 1, and frankly, I am here to state my case in defence of Orange flavoured Desserts and then take my leave. Orange is known for being a delicate balance between Sweet and Sour, much like Pineapple. The difference between Orange and Pineapple, I believe, is the absolute concentration of Citrus flavour. Citrus has such a unique and wonderful flavour that it frankly is in a league of its own in the realm of Fruit Flavours. Think about it, Orange hard candies are among the most loved in any set of them, Orange pound cake is absolutely delightful, Orange Chocolate pair wonderfully together due to both being overpoweringly sour and sweet at the same times but introducing their own unique flavours, HAVE YOU EVER HAD AN ORANGE ICE LOLLIE??? Orange does everything and it does it all AMAZINGLY, thus, in my mind, crowning it, the best Fruit Flavour in Desserts.

Thank you for reading.

[purplesurveys]

1961

Do people tell you you have cold hands? Never. I do have chicken skin on my arms, so people are always remarking that I must be cold and if I want a jacket. That's probably the closest, most relevant thing I can answer for this hahaha.

Do you feel that the shape of the pasta alters the taste? Well, no. I have preferences that I enjoy more than others though so I will typically go for meals that use the shapes I like.

How often do you listen to rock music? Not nearly as often as I used to.

In games, do you like to roleplay as good or bad? I don't really do roleplaying.

What was your favourite colour when you were 10? Oh it was most definitely black by that point and remained black for several years, lol.

When were you last in a hospital? Last time in a hospital was ~3 years ago when I visited my mom post-hysterectomy. I was the most useless visitor and barely served as a source of comfort for my mom because all I did was cringe and grimace at all the tubes and needles and dried blood fdskfhksdhf

Is there an instrument you don't like the sound of? I don't think so.

Have you ever sponsored an animal? I haven't...I can only do individual donations at the moment. I would love to be able to do this and it's one of my goals.

Would you rather be a kangaroo or a sea turtle? Kangaroo.

Do you like to get ready in the bathroom or the bedroom? Bedroom, I can move around more.

What's your favourite Coldplay song? Charlie Brown!

Do you have a favourite insect? No.

Have you ever worn coloured contacts for Halloween? Nope, I've never put on contacts at all.

Do you own a scooter? No, my balance is too terrible to get something like that for myself.

Which pastel colour is the nicest? Pink and purple.

When did you last play a Mario game? Safe guess would be 2-3 years ago; I haven't played the Switch in a looooong time.

Ever owned an actual piggy bank? I don't think so.

When did you last swing on a swing-set? There was a swing set in our Bulacan Airbnb in June-ish last year.

Do you study any subjects in your free time? I mean I read books with history essays in my free time, if that counts as studying. I do it for leisure more than anything, though.

Would you rather become fluent in 3 European languages or 3 Asian languages? 3 Asian.

Are your bedroom curtains long or short? Quite short.

Have you ever been zip-lining? I haven't. I was scared before, but it's something I'd try now if given the opportunity.

Did you carve a pumpkin this past year? No we don't do that here.

Have you volunteered in the past 6 months? I have not.

French fries or onion rings? That's hard...I LOVE both of them. Fries for me overtake the onion rings by the smallest bit, because I find them more filling. Onion rings feel like air to me, hahaha.

Why do you take surveys? I like keeping an extremely small circle of friends and we don't always get to talk, so having this allows me to be constantly in touch with myself and how I'm feeling. It also serves as my diary without me having to think of what to write about, since the survey questions themselves already serve as the prompts.

Do you suffer from anxiety? I definitely think I do. I take every scenario more heavily and seriously than anybody I know.

Did you ever take a swimming class? I did! I took summer swimming classes as a kid + we also had to take up swimming in PE classes for one whole quarter, every school year until I graduated high school.

Favorite healthy snack? Salad wraps.

Favorite Disney movie? Toy Story.

Do you consider yourself an artist? No.

How well can you bake a cake? I could follow a recipe but it would still taste terrible/like nothing. I know that because I've done the same with cookies only for them to be the most tasteless things on Earth lol.

Have you ever tasted banana milk? I have not sorry JK hahahaha I would love to though!

How many pairs of skinny jeans do you think you own? No skinny jeans. So uncomfortable.

Do you own a pair of Converse sneakers? Nope.

If you see a bee in your house... are you going to kill it? I'd completely avoid it and wait somewhere away until it finds its way back outside.

I’m ordering Chinese food; what do you want? My treat! Fried rice and eggplant casserole :)

Do you have a cat? We do!

Ever been in love? Yeah, I like to believe so.

Any piercings that you want? I'm good, thanks.

OTP? I uh, don't have any. Wow, is this what it's like to age? HAHAHA

Favorite quote? "You need some time alone. Myself, who's inside me, is also my friend. This friend has lived with me for 23 years. This friend has been in me for 23 years, but I might not know this friend perfectly. So it's important to take time to get to know this friend. Being alone is not a weird thing. Eating alone doesn't make you an outcast. Since we're born alone, we all need some time to be alone." ♡

Favorite singer? Beyonce, Hayley Williams, and Bruno Mars.

How long does it take you to shower? Anywhere between 10-15 minutes.

The reason I joined Tumblr? Tumblr was the lowkey cool thing to be part of when I was around 12-13. It was the era of fish-eye photography, and the most popular people on here were posting photos of their Arizona iced tea, Vans flags in their rooms, fireworks with long-exposure LOL IF YOU KNOW YOU KNOW. It was a space for the cool kids and me being a wallflower and hearing all about it, decided to join it to see what the fuss is about.

Eventually I grew out of that photographer wannabe bubble and turned my blog into a stan account for wrestling for a few years.

Baked macaroni and cheese or regular? Regular one is ok but baked is fine too! I did have baked mac a sickening amount in high school so that's why I went with regular.

What’s the first thing you learned how to draw? I dunno. Probably a simple triangle-square house, haha.

Who wrote the last book you read? Baek Sehee.

What’s the middle name of your best friend? I'm not giving that away :)

How far away do you live from the closest aquarium? Around an hour and a half away.

Who in your family has a birthday in January? My dad!

What’s your favorite country song? Obsssssssesssssssssed with Beyoncé's Sweet Honey Buckiin.

Pizza rolls or bagel bites? I will never get sick of pizza rolls.

What’s the last show you really got into that you have to wait for the next season of? Extraordinary Attorney Woo. < Nice, a K-drama sighting! :) Anywho, mine is Squid Game hahaha. That Season 2 was so great. K-dramas tend to suuuUUUUUCK! at Season 2s so I didn't walk in with much expectations, but Squid Game seemed to break the streak for me.

When’s the last time you saw fireworks? January 1st, of course.

Have you ever witnessed a car accident? I've seen a few happen in real-time.

Do you own a pair of fuzzy socks? Nope.

Have you ever been skinny dipping? No thanks.

Sprinkles or frosting? Frosting.

Do you like mushrooms? Yes! I love the earthy, deep taste.

Have you ever worked in a grocery store? I haven't.

What’s your Subway order? I've never ordered from Subway.

Do you know how to roller skate? I mean I know how to balance and glide, but no tricks. I had a pair of roller skates until my early teens.

Can you read sheet music? No.

What’s one food your family has at Thanksgiving? At what?

Do you like painting? I like painting if it's the paint-by-numbers kind, meaning I just have to follow directions and I know I'll be able to complete an image. I never paint from scratch because...well, I'm just not creative, and I don't have the ability to make images in my head and turn them into art.

Do you have to sleep with a fan on? Technically I have to but I hate how loud fans are lol, so what I do is to turn on the aircon until it's freezing enough, then I turn it off when I go to bed so that I fall asleep while it's still cold, even without no fan.

Name one thing you put on a salad: Idk but at Salad Stop - which is the only place I get salads/salad wraps from - I like their Caesar salad wrap or their seared tuna one.

What’s the last thing you ordered from a Mexican restaurant? Chipotle chicken sandwich + fries + iced coffee from Army Navy. They're Mexican-American more than anything which explains why all the stuff I got is literally the furthest from Mexican cuisine lmao.

Do you carry a purse or a backpack? Handbag.

What kind of soda is your favorite? I'll drink Pepsi or Sprite, but I'd rather not have soda at all.

Do you like your in-laws? I only have one in-law and I really like her!

Toe socks or ankle socks? I haven't tried toe socks so ankle socks win by default, even though they aren't also necessarily my favorite thing in the world. They never hang on to my feet lol

Nachos or chips and salsa? Nachos!

What’s the name of your pets? Cooper, Agi, and Max. We also had Tobi, Michelle, Andi, Kimi, Miki, and Arlee :)

What’s your Chick-fil-A order? I'd order from there if we actually had them here, sorry survey maker for not living in the US!

Regular or pink lemonade? Regular idk what the pink one is.

Chinese or Japanese cuisine? Japanese. Chinese is super underwhelming and unexciting for me, which I guess is because of all the influences it's already passed onto Filipino cuisine. It feels like ordinary everyday food, just with different spices. At least Japanese cuisine has raw fish and fermented soybeans and such.

Do you own a pair of Crocs? No. I think they look fine, it's just that texture-wise I hate how it feels to the feet.

Does anyone in your family have a birthday in February? One of my uncles, yes.

What’s your Taco Bell order? I've never memorized their menu because Taco Bells are soooooo hard to find here. So whenever I find one, I usually just go for the largest, most ridiculously stuffed burrito they have to make most of my time there.

Have you ever lived in a trailer/doublewide? Nope.

Pizza or nacho lunchables? Idk man please pick for me haha

Have you ever been to a strip club? Nopes.

Did you ever participate in any pageants when you were younger? Ewwwwwwww no.

What kind of cheese is your favorite? Mozzarella.

Make the perfect taco salad: I've never had that.

Name a character from your favorite TV show: Gus Fring, king of my heart.

Do you like going to arcades? They're okay. I only go to uncrowded ones though.

What kind of meat do you like the most? Pork.

Snakes or spiders? Snakes.

Have you ever had your nails done professionally? No.

Is anyone in your family in law enforcement? I don't think so, no.

What’s a fruit you dislike? All of them, except for avocado.

Make the perfect omelet: In breakfast buffets, we usually have the omelet chef add all the fillings they have :) So anything goes for me really when it comes to omelets!

[magicalsliceofpie]

Day 6-10

On day six I was so tired. All I remember eating was an omelet with cheese and some hot chocolate. I was stressed out because I was trying to finish up some final projects for class. I didn't finish them which stressed me out more.

On day seven I felt completely exhausted. I stayed in bed all day but I didn't do much. I tried to finish my final projects which were due the next morning but I was just so tired. I started feeling sorry for myself so I made some cookie dough and ate 6 good size cookies worth. I also made 2 packs of the cream carbonara ramen flavor from that spicy ramen brand. At the end of the day I almost finished the projects out of anxiety but I fell asleep anyway. I barely had any liquids that day. I did have a glass or two of milk.

On day eight I was woke up very sick. I finished my projects early in the morning and printed them out. I felt dizzy and disoriented but didn't have any other symptoms. Every time I get sick and think its something else I get told it was stress induced and I can't keep going to the doctor. So I just wrote it off and went to work and my late lab. At work I felt even worse and I just stopped by my lab to turn in my project and told my professor that I wasn't feeling good. He let me leave and I'm grateful for that. I could barely drive home. I also slept terrible with constant tossing and turning. That day I drank a cup of milk and ate a banana. I had one slice of pizza when I got home. I drank a lot of water and some sugar free Gatorade for the electrolytes.

On day nine I took my temperature and it was 100 on my forehead and 102 under my tongue. I didn't feel good at all and I called out of work and school. I drank even more liquids that day. Only water this time because the gatorade started to taste pretty bad. I couldn't stomach anything with sugar or even sweet after eating all that cookie dough on day seven. I ate two eggs and two prunes for breakfast. I puked up everything around lunch. For dinner I had clam chowder and a slice of sourdough.

On day ten I was starting to feel better. When I'm sick, throwing up signals the end of it. I ate one small pancake, I made a white rice with a bit of butter and salt, and I blended frozen blue berries, yogurt, and some local honey together. I went to my late lab to present my final project but I called out of work again. They don't mind calling out because they don't have a lot of staff and don't want anything to spread. One time something spread to half the company and from then on they rather you just stay home. One of my class professors asked for a doctors note and I don't know how to tell her that the doctors is too expensive for me right now and that this was likely stress induced anyway. So I just told her that I didn't have one but that I was unsafe to drive to work or school. That usually works but I haven't gotten an email back yet. When I got home I ate a handful of peanuts (lightly salted, no sugar) and a tortilla out of the fridge. My appetite hasn't returned quite yet.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I didn't exercise or do my routine for any of those days. I managed to shower twice and do my laundry but that's about it. This is what my health is like. I have given up on going to the doctors because they tell me the same thing. It's stress. And I have no choice but to believe them because they ran so many tests that I could barely afford. Blood tests and stool samples and ultrasounds. There's nothing but a bit of fat around my liver and even that shouldn't cause any symptoms since it is barley noticeable on the ultrasound. I would like to believe that I have some mystery illness and the doctors aren't listening to me but they are listening.

Everything just keeps showing negative. I feel like I'm going crazy. I was in lab on day ten and someone told me "It seems like you are sick every week. Did they (the doctors) tell you what's wrong?" and it just stuck with me. Even the people I barley know can tell that I'm just not healthy. I push and push and push but it just makes it worse. I know I'm just ranting now but I am happy that I made healthy choices with my food this week. I am going to keep trying to eat healthy and exercise. This blog and the food journal I have been keeping will help me in the future. If there is something wrong with me I can prove it by showing that I'm living a healthy life style. And if there is nothing wrong with me then I can see the patterns of what makes me sick.

I'm trying to keep a positive outlook. I'm going to get back into routine very soon.

[live-love-laugh-lesbian]

HIII this is probably gonna be the last ask i send as your swiftie exchange anon haha! also i dont know what timezone you are but ive scheduled it for 6am gmt for tomorrow if i remember correct skdkekdfk (but also you said quid which means pounds i think so im taking a wild guess that you are somewhat the same timezone as me haha)

yep im in uni! honestly kinda harsh kakdkekxfj ive got tests on the first week back but i suppose that's to ne expected haha! it is quite stressful but like c'est la vie yk? good luck on your exams!!

oh also im so glad youre feeling better!! i hope you feel awesome soon!

oh yeahh that makes complete sense! you dont have to show them to me if you dont want to btw but once i reveal myself and you are okay w it you can dm me! (only if you want tho no pressure at all!!)

yeahh thats so real actually! people always want what they dont have and that makes me kinda sad but also im one of those people so ajdeksjd i cant really say anything abt it akfkekdjf

yeahh hypocrisy is so linked like to everyday stuff!! and what you said makes more sense than what i ever couldve ajdjejsjfn and inflation is HORRIBLE ive witnessed price of stuff like cheese go up by so much and it appals me! and that is a ridiculous difference from your phone bill!

oohh i wish i was you id love to meet my online friends!!

yeah!! like the main problem with fast fashion isnt the cheap quality (i mean perhaps it is) but also the PEOPLEEEE WHO BARELY GET PAIDD!!

thats such a thought out and good answer!! climate change and the way politicians handle shit is so real like it NEEDSS to be addressed!! and i hope you get to see your doctors!!

and same im such a pushover like i wish i could not be but alas it is but a dreamm!! i think for me what you said is basically my answer and like people being assholes and thinking theyre funny? lile people who think its okay to make offensive jokes or say a slur bc they think theyre funny annoys me soo bad!!!!! and also people who manipulate other people like ewwww and just like horrible people in general. also thats horrible!! why does anyone think its okay to do that???

hmm... honestly rename strawberries fluffleberries and making bananas rainbow sounds like an awesome idea sjdjekdn hmm this is hard kakdkdskf maybe i would replace car honks with goose honks hehe i feel like thats such a silly answer but tbf i am but a silly goose!! what about you?

and my question to you: what are some things you are grateful for (see i say things not people bc i feel like people is a very general question ajfjrjdjf but you can tell me people too if you want!!)

thank youu!! i had an awesone time chatting with you you're lovely <3

have an awesome day!!!

-swiftie spring exchange anonnnnn

Hello! My country change timezones slightly I think based on clocks, but I think we're currently BST? I can never remember, a bit embarrassing imo XD It's cool that we might be close in time zones!!

Ah I have no exams cause I'm not in uni, but I am tutoring kids for exams so does that count? XD I hope your tests go well!!

Cheap quality sucks, but it'd improve if companies were willing to give up just a teeny tiny bit of their profits...I've become so increasingly anti company over the last like 5 years I think XD And thank you!! Honestly the "offensive is funny" type is SO annoying. I've met a few that were like "uhhh it's dark humour" and I've been like. You do not have dark humour, you just want to be rude.

I did however get a cookie once from a guy who realised that I had been upset by his stupid joke (I can't remember what exactly it was, but I think it was like...either homophobic or misogynistic. The apology was nice to get because it was unexpected. Alas at the time I was unable to eat gluten so the cookie part was awkward.) And manipulation just sucks?? I feel like people get away with it a lot because it's not obviously awful until you realise what's going on.

Silly answers are encouraged for that one!! (And always tbh) XD And honestly I would get rid of sparkling water. I feel like it's like marmite - people love it or hate it. And I hate sparkling water, I literally cannot handle the texture. And one time I accidentally got some instead of regular water. The memory haunts me. So yeah I'd wind up half the world by getting rid of it altogether and just watch the chaos XD

My final answer (also I know who you are now cause of when I logged on BUT I'm gonna answer this anyways on here) would be my cats (haha not people so they slip through...not things either but not people), the way life has turned out (it's not perfect, but I'm in a much better position than I ever expected even just like 2 years ago), and my art abilities (because I like that I can draw, and draw pretty decently, it's a fun and usually relaxing hobby!)

I had the time of my life answering questions with you, and I look forwards to hopefully talking more with you!!

[survey--s]

576.

Was there anything that you planned to do today but didn’t? Have a lie-in, lol. It’s my first night at home in eight days but of course I barely got any sleep and was up for the day at 5am ha.

Is there anyone you interact with often on social media but not in person? Yeah, quite a few people.

What color box does your favorite cereal come in? One comes in orange, another comes in a yellow box.

Do you have any plates, dishes, mugs etc. with pretty illustrations on them? Not really. Our plates are mostly white with duck egg blue trim and heart shapes around the edges. The mugs are mostly plain-ish.

Does anywhere on your body currently hurt, or feel sore? Yeah, my period is due any day now and I’ve just started with stomach cramps.

What is your favorite snack to eat with a hot beverage? Cake, for sure, or maybe cookies.

Is there any advice you have been given, that sticks in your mind? It’s not advice I was given as such, but I love the quote “Worrying means you suffer twice” from the Fantastic Beasts movies. As someone with anxiety it really resonated with me.

What’s the nicest advice you have ever been given about love/relationships? I can’t really think of anything right now.

Do you own any adult coloring books? What kind(s) do you like? I have about five but I haven’t touched any of them for years now. I did a lot of colouring during lockdown though.

When was the last time you got some new headphones? A couple of years ago.

Is there a lamp in your living room? What color is its shade? No.

Do you know anyone whose name starts with the letter X? My second cousin is called Xavier.

Have you eaten any rice or pasta today? No. I had toast for breakfast and then Ryvita with various toppings for lunch.

Name a food that you dislike the texture of. Bananas.

Which of your friends do you confide in the most? I don’t really confide in anyone that much, to be honest. I’m quite a private person outside of these surveys.

Have you ever fallen out of love with someone? If so, why do you think that happened? Sure, for various different reasons.

If you have pets, do you talk to them? Of course, I talk to all of them!

Are there any TV shows that you strongly dislike, but others seem to love? Married at First Sight, Love Island, The Office, Brooklyn Nine Nine.

Is there anything you haven’t done lately, that you’d like to do soon? Go to see my parents - we’re actually going on Saturday though. Do you own any T-shirts with brand logos on them? Maybe one or two, yeah.

Have you experienced any kind of food cravings lately? Smoked salmon and couscous, randomly. Though not together, lol.

Have you watched or read the news today? No, I never do either of those things anymore, honestly. I find the news is so bad for my mental health.

Describe the cover illustration of the book closest to you. I can’t see the cover of a book from where I’m sitting.

Are there any take-away or fast-food places close to your house? If so, do you ever order food from any of them? Yeah, two chippies, two kebab/pizza/burger places, an Indian and a Chinese. I order from the ones that deliver sometimes, yeah. Maybe twice a month?

Is there anything happening tomorrow, that you’re looking forward to? I’m looking forward to waking up in my own bed and not having to faff about going for a house-sit lol.

[fluffywings13]

Chance Meetings

Six year old Izuku watches the two other kids yell and push a purple haired boy around at the top of the jungle gym, and something boils inside him, dad always says that sometimes being a hero means doing the right thing, without hesitation, even if it seems everything else is stacked against you.

Gritting his teeth, he jumps down onto the slide, landing in a stumble, he runs across the playground, and pushes the purple haired boy behind him, throwing an arm out protectively. “Leave him alone! He didn’t do anything wrong!”

The two other boys scoff, kick rocks at them, and turn away, stomping across the playground to do whatever else bullies do when they’re separated from their victim.

Izuku waits until they’re far out of ear shot, and turn, looking at the other boy in concern. “Are you okay?”

“Huh….” His new companion seems shocked. “Y—Yeah..?”

He doesn’t believe him and points down the street with his thumb. “You’re bleeding, do you wanna come down to my place? It’s right down the street. My dad could help you.”

The purple haired boy rubs the back of his neck lightly. “You’re….Sure it’s okay?”

Izuku nods firmly. “Absolutely.”

“O—Okay.” The other boy nods. “I’ll come.”

“Cool, follow me.” The greenette turns and gestures for the other boy to follow. “My names Izuku, what’s your name?”

“H—Hitoshi…” Hitoshi spares him a shy glance. “Y—Your dad won’t mind?”

“Nope.” Izuku shakes his head. “My dad hates bullies and it’s not easy to make him hate anything.”

The purple haired six year old looks up at the large nice apartment building they approach, it’s so tall, and a man standing outside opens the door for them with a smile. “This is so cool!”

“It’s home.” Izuku presses the button for the elevator. “Me and dad live all the way at the top, dad likes being up high, he likes being in the sky.”

The elevator doors open with a ding, and Hitoshi follows Izuku inside, watching him push the very last button on the list. They ride up in companionable silence, it takes a couple minutes to go from the ground floor all the way to the top, and Hitoshi’s eyes widen at the apartment they step into, directly from the elevator, stumbling when Izuku pulls him forward.

“Dad!” He turns to the other boy when he calls out. “Are you home!”

“In here, nestling!” A voice calls from a room to the right.

“Come on, Hitoshi.” Izuku gestures for him to follow him as he steps forward. “Dad can help you.”

“Uh….okay.” The purple haired boy follows him, crossing his arms nervously, and looks around in slight awe at the large bedroom they step into. “It’s so big.”

“Yea,” the green haired boy nods. “It’s big, but it’s not bad. Dad?”

“In the bathroom.” They follow the sound of a man’s voice into the bathroom, Hitoshi pauses in his tracks at the large red wings on the man’s bare back, feathers darkened from being wet, giving away to the notion that the man just got out of the shower. “What’s up?” The man turns, and he swallows when gold eyes meet his, and the man frowns. “Who’s this, Zu?”

“This is Hitoshi.” Izuku grabs his hand and it helps ground him in his shock. “He’s my new friend, he was being bullied and got hurt.”

“I see—”

Hitoshi can’t hold it back anymore. “You’re Hawks!”

The blonde man, Hawks, smiles at him. “Sure am, kiddo, you can call me Keigo.” He gestures him forward. “Come on, let’s clean you up.” He steps forward shakily and raises his arms slightly when the hero curls his fingers under his arms and lifts him up to sit on the bathroom counter. The six year old watches the hero open the cupboard above the sink and pulls out a few things, disinfectant, cotton balls, bandages. “This might sting a little, but it’ll only be a minute.” Hitoshi nods, squeaking softly when the hero dabs at the gash on his cheek with a cotton ball of disinfectant, it only takes a minute, at the most, and the man secures the bandage over it. “There, good to go.”

Hitoshi smiles at him shyly. “Thanks, Keigo.”

“Hey, no problem.” Keigo lifts the boy off the counter and sets him down on his feet. “Bullies suck, they’re worse then villains, you ever see’em again, you tell’em you sic Hawks on them.”

The boy giggles softly and nods, stumbling slightly when Izuku catches his hand and tugs him forward. “Come on, Hito, I wanna show you my room!”

…

They explore Izuku’s collection and play for a while until they grow bored. “Hito,” he looks up at his new friend questioningly and Izuku grins. “Wanna play heroes and villains?”

He smiles slightly. “Sure…How do you play?”

“Come on,” Izuku jumps up from his spot on the floor, Hawks and Present Mic dolls completely forgotten. “Let’s go get my dad, he’ll play with us too!”

“Uh, okay.”

Hitoshi climbs to his feet and runs after the other boy when he darts out of the room. Keigo smiles at them when they appear in the kitchen, eating a banana, and looks between them inquisitively. “What’s up, lil birds?”

“Dad,” Izuku bounces slightly. “Will you play heroes and villains with us?”

“Yea, sure,” the hero tosses the banana peel in the waste basket. “Want me to be the hero or the supervillain?”

Hitoshi looks at his new friend questioningly, because he doesn’t know which one to choose, which one does someone decide Hawks to play, the hero or the villain, Izuku grins and leans in closer. “It’s a lot more fun to be the villain when you play with dad.”

He doesn’t really want to be the villain, but he does want to have fun, and if anyone would know which one is more fun to be when playing this game with Keigo, it would be Izuku, so he nods. “Okay.”

Izuku turns back. “Hero!”

“Okie dokie.” Hitoshi watches the man turn around and open the cupboard behind him, reaching in for something, and his eyes widen when he pulls out a package of Oreos and holds them out. “Here’s your stolen treasure, go hide it villains, you got two minutes before this hero comes searching.”

The greenette snatches the full package of Oreos up. “Come on, Hito!”

He grins slightly when the hero winks at him and turns away, not watching the two boys dart off to wherever they were going to hide their stolen treasure, and he chases after Izuku to catch up. The other boy leads him into a back closet he didn’t know was there, and crawls behind boxes with him, where there sits an open air vent duct built into the wall. “We’ll hide’em here.” Izuku sets the Oreos down in the duct. “Okay, my dad plays dirty when he’s the hero, our best bet at keeping the secret location of our treasure is to avoid him at all costs, so you have to be really sneaky.”

“How do we know he doesn’t know where we are already?” Hitoshi whispers softly. “What if he’s following us with his feathers?”

“Nope, he’s not.” Izuku shakes his head. “He sheds his feathers when we play heroes and villains so he can’t cheat, he puts them in his closet until we’re done playing, so we’re safe unless he catches us.”

“That’s so cool!” Hitoshi curls a hand around his mouth and giggles softly. “Oops, sorry.”

The green haired boy giggles. “It’s okay. So, no matter what tricks my dad pulls, don’t tell him where we hid our treasure, because if he can’t get the location out of us when we stop playing, we get the whole pack for ourselves.”

“Really!” This time the purplette is mindful not to shout. “That’s awesome!”

“I know!” Izuku cheers softly. “Oreos are the best cookies!”

“I think so too.” Hitoshi spares the package a glance. “Now what?”

“Now we go follow my dad around and see just how great of an actual hero he is.” Izuku giggles softly. “You know that dog from Up?”

The other boy nods slightly. “Uhuh?”

“Well, that’s my dad,” Izuku giggles softly. “Especially when he sees something shiny.”

Hitoshi giggles. “Really?”

“Uhuh,” The greenette nods. “He one time flew into a billboard because there was sparkling glitter on it.”

Hitoshi giggles again. “That’s so funny!”

Izuku giggles and nods. “It is! Auntie Rumi recorded it! I have the video saved on my iPod. I can show you when we’re done playing.” He crawls out from behind the boxes. “Come on, Hito, remember, don’t let my dad catch you, he plays dirty.”

Hitoshi crawls out after him. “Okay, Zu.”

…

Hitoshi was good at being sneaky, he was naturally really quite, like a cat, he loves cats, he wants a cat, but Ms. Matsuda won’t allow it, he doesn’t like Ms. Matsuda, anyway, he’s being really sneaky, peering around the empty living room as he creeps from cupboard under the sink to the bathroom.

And shrieks with laughter when he’s scooped up suddenly from behind. “Okay villain,” Keigo curls an arm around his waist and whispers in his ear. “I’ll only ask you once, where did you hide the cookies?”

“I’ll never tell!” He cries, kicking in an attempt to free himself, shrieking when he’s flipped over, dangling upside down in the hero’s grasp, his lavender t-shirt sliding down slightly. “Hey!”

“I can see this interrogation requires some measures to loosen your lips, villain.” The six year old squeals with laughter when fingers claw into his belly. “I’ll torture the information outta you, villain, I’m not above doing so.” Zu was right, Keigo does play dirty, and he’s even sneakier then he himself is, he didn’t even know he was behind him until he was picked up. “You ready to talk yet, villain, you know what you have to do to stop this.” The purple haired boy shrieks with laughter, struggling between deciding about pushing his shirt back down or trying to pull the hero’s fingers away from his belly, he settles on the latter. “Still not ready to talk yet, huh, that’s fine, we can change tactics.”

Hitoshi breaks after two raspberries are blown into his belly and screams the location of the cookies, he gets two more just because Keigo’s a dirty hero, and shrieks when he’s tossed over the man’s shoulder, watching his wings grow as he calls his feathers back, and they make their way to the far back closet.

“Hito! You got caught!”

He pushes himself up against the hero’s back, giggling, and nods at his new friend. “Keigo’s a mean hero!”

Izuku giggles and nods, shrieking when he’s scooped up off his feet by a few dozen feathers, they both hear the crackling of the package of Oreos and Hitoshi shrieks when the hero spins around quickly. “Come on villains, let’s go get some milk for our cookies.”

They got to have the whole pack of Oreos anyway.

[gay-salt-amber]

It's hot where I am and I want ice cream so ice cream headcanons (and if you also add my Ocs please you can if not then you don't have to) of the ships either getting a ice cream date, dirty jokes with ice cream, or someone buying lots of ice cream and was like "welp, dorm ice cream party where we go"

So, imma do general hcs, mostly their favorite ice creams but also so general stuff

–

Epel 5:

Epel: Rocky road

Leona: I feel like he's not a big ice cream person but if he was to pick a flavor it'd be like blueberry or smth

Ruggie: He likes ice cream floats most and he loves black cows which are coke and some type of ice cream, which is typically chocolate

Jack: Vanilla, when he ordered it the first time Leona said, "So you like your ice cream just how you like us in bed, extremely basic"

Deuce: he just gets a blackberry ice cream with a cherry on top and watches leona and Jack argue about how Jack likes it in the ass or smth following the vanilla comment

–

jamikaliace

Ace: He originally was just a basic strawberry guy, but when he was out eating with Kalim and Jamil, he saw some dragon fruit ice cream and instantly it was his favorite ice cream, and it is to this day

Kalim: I mean with how big this guy's sweet tooth is, he'll eat any ice cream and love it, as long as it's not bitter because according to him, "It just makes zero sense! It's meant to be sweet why tf is it bitter?!"

Jamil: Coffee ice cream with lil mangos on top, the ice cream shop worker looks at him weird whenever he orders it cuz it's so specific, like why mango? He doesn't know it's just good

—

Riddles bois

Che'nya: this man is freaky when it comes to ice cream (and in other ways too but we won't talk about that) so his favorite ice cream is ube ice cream, ube is a type of yam. He'll put chocolate sauce and rainbow sprinkles on it then dip his fries into it, this weirded everyone but Riddle out when he first had it infront of the others

Riddle: Well, since he obviously wasn't able to have it when he was a kid, he's sort of trying different flavors to see what he likes but right now his favorite is cherry garcia which is cherry flakes and fudge in cherry ice cream, the way his face lit up when he tried it made his boys so in love again

Cater: Orange flavored ice cream with cinnamon and caramel on the top, it's strange and barely sweet but that's how he likes it.. infact he prolly would have put salt on it if he wasn't stopped

Floyd: OK, hear me out; oyster ice cream. It's weird and the only reason I know it exists is because the first Lady, Dolly Madison popularized it. But yeah, Riddle would go out to buy it for him and have to use every part of his body to not gag purely by the smell of the container

—

Rookvilneige

Rook: So, he likes pomegranate flavored ice cream and when he first tried to order it in English, he tried his best but the 'pome' just wouldn't pronounce right and he just sadly looked at Vil who smiled and ordered for him

Neige: He loves French vanilla solely because Rooks family has their own recipe for it and anything Rooks family has a recipe for he instantly loves cuz his family is full of amazing cooks and stuff

Vil: Vils favorite ice cream is banana ice cream with a bunch of other fruits like passion fruit, pineapple and strawberry all tossed into the bowl as well and if he really feels like it he'll put some peanut butter sauce on it with some chocolate chips but that's a date night thing mainly

—-

Jadetrey 

Jade: Once, while at the Cafe on campus that trey works at, he asked trey to just serve him whatever ice cream he thought Jade would like and out Trey came with blue moon ice cream topped with some diamond sprinkles on the top to represent Jades earring and from then on, the only ice cream he gets is blue moon ice cream with those sprinkles and will have it no other way

Trey: I feel like his baker self would love ice cream alot, when he has ice cream he typically makes it as an ice cream sandwich but instead of cookies or those chocolate things, he makes large macaroon like biscuits and puts his matcha, gren tea or German chocolate I'm between them and ears it like that, or he mashes some grammar crackers into a bowl and eats it like that

–

Esther x Silver x Sebek

Esher: Esthers favorite ice cream is chocolate brownie and once, Silver put lil chocolate bat wings on the side and Esther debated eating it cuz it was so cute, then it started to drip on his fingers so bat decided to look his bfs straight in the eye and lick the dripping ice cream, drag his tongue up and slowly pull its tongue back in his mouth his bois were SO flustered

Silver: Silver likes earl gray ice cream with a cinnamon stick in it, he likes it cuz earl gray is Sebeks favorite tea and he loves Sebek sooo…. Yknow, gay

Sebek: Some type of mint ice cream with choclate curls on top, I get the vibe that Arie HATES mint things and says they taste like toothpaste so whenever Sebeks just chilling, eating his ice cream you can quietly hear a ‘ew wtf?’ from down the hall

–

Idiazulmal

Idia: He lives off of ice cream when he's not just chugging energy drinks, typically his favorite flavor is like something pumpkiny but if Iida is really pulling a hard all nighter, he’ll make a float with bang/monster/rockstar/whatever his energy of choice and some pumpkin ice cream. Azul can typically tell when a day like that is coming so he’ll send actual ice cream or a milkshake from the lounge so Idia wont eat any goddamn energy drink floats

Azul: I was originally gonna give him something fruity because the octopus man is rather fruity himself but I checked the wiki and ig he doesn’t like healthy stuff so now I think his favorite ice cream would be chocolate peanut butter cup ice cream, the more chocolate the better

Malleus: Now we got the ice cream lover himself, I feel like he’d like strawberry, its so different from what one would think his favorite would be like some bitter blackberry ice cream or something, but no, he loves strawberry ice cream which Azul and Idia find absolutely adorable

—-

A few general thingies

Idiazulmals most common date is an ice cream date

The one who brought in all that ice cream was Leona who bought it for his boyfriends for a movie night and when other Savanaclaw members that weren’t Jack, Leona or Ruggie tried to have any Leona would tell them to go fuck off cuz that was for his boyfriends and his boyfriends only

I think jade would be a picky eater, mainly because of textures and stuff, so Floyd was like, “Wait you actually ate ice cream and enjoyed it?! I thought you wouldn’t like the texture of it or how cold it is!” and Jade is just like, “I mean I also had a hot man serving it to me so that may also be part of it”

So, for one of the tests NRC and RSA both have to take, they take a practice test before the actual test and if you score high enough on the practice one you don't have to do the real one and will get your grade based on the practice one. (This is how my teacher did our US constitution test btw, me and another kid were the only ones with high enough marks to not take the real one, prolly cuz I like and pay attention in history -_-) and Riddle was the only one out of his bois and like one of 3 who scored high enough on the practice test so he just sat infront of his tv with a frog hat on and ate ice cream all day

[firstfullmoon]

Do you have favorite quotes related about the importance of small details?

“The precious intimacy of little things.”

— Daphné du Maurier, I Will Never Be Young Again

“On my windowsill when I got home, there was a tumbler with pink jelly in it, and embedded in the jelly, sliced strawberries and bananas… [my neighbour] cooks at odd hours. She must have made the strawberry jelly this morning. When I buy baklava, which is not often because I eat too many, I leave a few for her on her windowsill, with a headscarf over them so the wasps don’t come. For these little gifts we don’t thank each other with words. They are commas of care.”

— John Berger, From A to X: A Story in Letters

“I suppose I could spend time theorizing how it is that people are not bad to each other, but that’s really not the point. The point is that in almost every instance of our lives, our social lives, we are, if we pay attention, in the midst of an almost constant, if subtle, caretaking. Holding open doors. Offering elbows at crosswalks. Letting someone else go first. Helping with the heavy bags. Reaching what’s too high, or what’s been dropped. Pulling someone back to their feet. Stopping at the car wreck, at the struck dog. The alternating merge, also known as the zipper. This caretaking is our default mode and it’s always a lie that convinces us to act or believe otherwise. Always.”

“One of the woman was gently arranging an older woman’s collar beneath her sweater, freeing it from the cardigan’s neck, using both of her hands to jostle it free but also seeming to spend a little more time than necessary, creasing the fold of the collar, the other hand kind of resting on her shoulder, the two of them chatting the whole time, sitting there holding each other, nodding, my head twisting toward them like a sunflower as I finished the stairs and walked by, so in love was I with this common flourish of love, this everyday human light.”

“but her need to share the photo with me [...] smiling and looking at it, smiling and looking at me looking at it, me smiling and looking at her looking at it, which is simply called sharing what we love, what we find beautiful, which is an ethics.”

— Ross Gay, The Book of Delights

“He’s got a fever. He’s all alone. So I’m gonna buy him something to eat.” “The congee downstairs is quite good.” “He doesn’t want congee.” “What does he want?” “Can’t taste anything so he wants sesame syrup.” [...] “What are you cooking?” “I had a sudden craving for sesame syrup.”

“Why did you call me at the office today?” “I had nothing to do. I wanted to hear your voice.”

— In the Mood for Love, dir. Wong Kar-Wai

— Danusha Laméris, “Small Kindnesses”

“It all matters. That someone turns out the lamp, picks up the windblown wrapper, says hello to the invalid, pays at the unattended lot, listens to the repeated tale, folds the abandoned laundry, plays the game fairly, tells the story honestly, acknowledges help, gives credit, says good night, resists temptation, wipes the counter, waits at the yellow, makes the bed, tips the maid, remembers the illness, congratulates the victor, accepts the consequences, takes a stand, steps up, offers a hand, goes first, goes last, chooses the small portion, teaches the child, tends to the dying, comforts the grieving, removes the splinter, wipes the tear, directs the lost, touches the lonely, is the whole thing. What is most beautiful is least acknowledged. What is worth dying for is barely noticed.”

— Laura McBride, We Are Called to Rise

“I’ve never told you this,” she said. “But there’s something about taking the cart back instead of leaving it in the parking lot. I don’t know when this came to me; it was a few years ago. There’s a difference between leaving it where you empty it and taking it back to the front of the store. It’s significant.” “Because somebody has to take them in.” “Yes. And if you know that, and you do it for that one guy, you do something else. You join the world…You move out of your isolation and become universal.”

— Andre Dubus, “Out of the Snow”

“It’s true that, in Vietnamese, we rarely say I love you, and when we do, it is almost always in English. Care and love, for us, are pronounced clearest through service: plucking white hairs, pressing yourself on your son to absorb a plane’s turbulence and, therefore, his fear. Or now—as Lan called to me, “Little Dog, get over here and help me help your mother.” And we knelt on each side of you, rolling out the hardened cords in your upper arms, then down to your wrists, your fingers. For a moment almost too brief to matter, this made sense—that three people on the floor, connected to each other by touch, made something like the word family.”

— Ocean Vuong, On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous: A Novel

— Ada Limón, from “The Great Blue Heron of Dunbar Road”

“I’m doing a balancing act with a stack of fresh fruit in my basket. I love you. I want us both to eat well.”

— Christopher Citro, from “Our Beautiful Life When It’s Filled WIth Shrieks”

“One of the primary ways we connect with each other is by eating together. Some of the connection happens simply by being in the same place at the same time and sharing the same food, but we also connect through specific actions, such as serving food to one another or making toasts: ‘May I offer you some potatoes?’ ‘Here’s to your health and happiness.’ Much of our fundamental well-being comes from the basic reassurance that there is a place for us at the table. We belong here. Here we are served and we serve others. Here we give and receive sustenance.”

— Edward Espe Brown, Tomato Blessings and Radish Teaching

“Attention is the beginning of devotion.”

“Now in the spring I kneel, I put my face into the packets of violets, the dampness, the freshness, the sense of ever-ness. Something is wrong, I know it, if I don’t keep my attention on eternity. May I be the tiniest nail in the house of the universe, tiny but useful. May I stay forever in the stream. May I look down upon the windflower and the bull thistle and the coreopsis with the greatest respect.”

“it is a serious thing

just to be alive on this fresh morning in this broken world.”

— Mary Oliver, Upstream: Selected Essays / from “Invitation”

— Wendy Cope, “The Orange”

“After learning my flight was detained 4 hours, I heard the announcement: if anyone in the vicinity of gate 4-A understands any Arabic, please come to the gate immediately. Well—one pauses these days. Gate 4-A was my own gate. I went there. An older woman in full traditional Palestinian dress, just like my grandma wore, was crumpled to the floor, wailing loudly. Help, said the flight service person. Talk to her. What is her problem? We told her the flight was going to be four hours late and she did this. I put my arm around her and spoke to her haltingly. Shu dow-a, shu-biduck habibti, stani stani schway, min fadlick, sho bit se-wee? The minute she heard any words she knew—however poorly used—she stopped crying. She thought our flight had been canceled entirely. She needed to be in El Paso for some major medical treatment the following day. I said no, no, we’re fine, you’ll get there, just late. Who is picking you up? Let’s call him and tell him. We called her son and I spoke with him in English. I told him I would stay with his mother until we got on the plane and would ride next to her—Southwest. She talked to him. Then we called her other sons just for the fun of it. Then we called my dad and he and she spoke for a while in Arabic and found out, of course, they had ten shared friends. Then I thought just for the heck of it why not call some Palestinian poets I know and let them chat with her. This all took up about 2 hours. She was laughing a lot by then. Telling about her life. Answering questions. She had pulled a sack of homemade mamool cookies—little powdered sugar crumbly mounds stuffed with dates and nuts—out of her bag—and was offering them to all the women at the gate. To my amazement, not a single woman declined one. It was like a sacrament. The traveler from Argentina, the traveler from California, the lovely woman from Laredo—we were all covered with the same powdered sugar. And smiling. There are no better cookies. And then the airline broke out the free beverages from huge coolers—non-alcoholic—and the two little girls from our flight, one African American, one Mexican American—ran around serving us all apple juice and lemonade, and they were covered with powdered sugar, too. And I noticed my new best friend—by now we were holding hands—had a potted plant poking out of her bag, some medicinal thing with green furry leaves. Such an old country traveling tradition. Always carry a plant. Always stay rooted to somewhere. And I looked around that gate of late and weary ones and thought, this is the world I want to live in. The shared world. Not a single person in this gate—once the crying of confusion stopped—has seemed apprehensive about any other person. They took the cookies. I wanted to hug all those other women, too. This can still happen anywhere. Not everything is lost.”

— Naomi Shihab Nye, “Gate A4″

“Then there are the things, if you are particularly lucky, that this person has done for you while you’re away: how in the pantry, in the freezer, in the refrigerator will be all the food you like to eat, the scotch you like to drink. There will be the sweater you thought you lost the previous year at the theater, clean and folded and back on its shelf. There will be the shirt with its dangling buttons, but the buttons will be sewn back in place. There will be your mail stacked on one side of his desk; there will be a contract for an advertising campaign you’re going to do in Germany for an Austrian beer, with his notes in the margin to discuss with your lawyer. And there will be no mention of it, and you will know that it was done with genuine pleasure, and you will know that part of the reason—a small part, but a part—you love being in this apartment and in this relationship is because this other person is always making a home for you, and that when you tell him this, he won’t be offended but pleased, and you’ll be glad, because you meant it with gratitude.”

— Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life

[writteninkat]

xii - overwhelmed

word count - 2,220

"if i love you was a promise, would you break it if you're honest?"

index

You walk towards the classroom with your palms sweating and your heart about to beat right out of your chest. You had just confessed to Katsuki thinking he also felt the same, but all he replied was a lousy 'you don't even know me'.

You furrow your brows, clenching your palms into fists in irritation. How am I so stupid? I came to Japan to prove myself and to that dumb father of mine that I can be a powerful hero! And yet here I am being swept off track by some lousy high school crush!

"Careful- if you stare any harder you're gonna melt holes through the walls." A tired and very familiar voice calls out feom behind you. You turn around, anger still clouding your head as your eyes fall on a violet-haired boy.

"Careful- if you don't do anything about your lack of sleep anytime soon you're gonna collapse." You spat back; suddenly everything around you vexes you. You send a mental message to everyone in school; today you're hot-headed, your patience is as thin as a hair strand and taking out your anger through physical violence seems like an amazing idea right about now.

"Jokes on you, I've been like this my whole life and I've never collapsed." He smirks, causing you to raise a brow. "Okay maybe I never collapsed from my lack of sleep."

"Look what the hell do you want?"

"Well- thought you looked pretty upset." He holds up two pastel yellow-colored papers. "And I just so happen to have two free ice cream passes for that new ice cream place right beside the campus." He takes a look at his watch, "We still have an hour and thirty minutes till the bell rings. What do you say?"

"And that idiot just says 'you barely even know me'" You wave your hands up, making a dumb face as well as a dumb voice to match, "like hello! I know I barely know you and that's why I feel so upset and conflicted right now! You get what I mean???" You huff back on your seat, shoving the small pink translucent teaspoon in your mouth.

Shinsou nods his head, eyes on his ice cream as he shoves a few scoops in his mouth. "Mmm- this banana flavor tastes amazing. You should try it." He offers his cup to you, making you frown.

"You're such a jerk! I thought you brought me here to let me vent out my anger." You frown, your eyebrows knitting together as you place your cup on the table, leaning back on your seat as you crossed your arms.

"I did. I listened as you vented out your anger to me and we're having ice cream but I never said we were going to talk about the situation." He points out, annoyingly unbothered expression resting on his face as he continues eating his own ice cream.

You look at him in irritation and silence for a few moments, trying to calm yourself before taking your little teaspoon and scooping a bit from his own cup. You shove the scoop inside your mouth, pouting. "The banana tastes amazing." You huff, expression still angry.

Shinsou chuckles lightly, the small smile actually lighting up his usually dark features. "It is, isn't it?" You've only ever met one person with a so-called 'contagious smile' and he was the funny boy you met at the park one day.

Ethan will have to share his spot in my list for 'contagious smiles'. You thought to yourself, letting a smile break your frown as you look down at your ice cream.

"Have you seen the new conjuring movie? It's pretty cool, a solid six out of ten." He shrugs. You shake your head, "I can't watch scary movies. I won't be able to sleep especially now that I live alone."

He raises a brow at you, "Oh come on. We can watch it together through video chat or something. I really wanna see you piss yourself while watching it." He chuckles, causing you to squint your eyes at him. "Is that a challenge?" You point your spoon accusingly at him.

"What if it is? You gonna back out? Loser?" He pushes jokingly, mirroring your squinted eyes. You bring your hand on the table in a fist, "Oh it's on."

Shinso walks you to your classroom just five minutes before the bell is about to ring. "How can I contact you?" He asks, doing the thing with his hand behind his nape as he looks away. "Here." You tug at his hand, writing down your discord account with a marker. "Call me after the sun sets. I'll be home by then."

He waves you good bye and you step in, almost completely forgetting about why you were annoyed so early in the morning. Your eyes fall on the blond boy, still looking angry as usual. His eyes meet yours for a fraction of a second before your looking towards your seat.

As you sit down, the bell rings and in comes Aizawa, tired as ever. "Today, you will all be choosing your hero names. This has a lot to do with the Pro-Hero draft picks and because you are only first years, any offers can be taken back before you graduate." He explains, pointing at a chart where Todoroki's, Katsuki's and your names are written at the top with thousands of heroes wanting to recruit you.

"You will all spend one week interning with the pro heroes you choose or those who chose you, depending on if you have multiple offers or just one." Aizawa continues to talk about the importance of hero names before Midnight walks in the classroom.

The class begins to cheer in excitement as they all are given boards and markers for their names. The cheering and yelling dies down in a few minutes but the excitement doesn't. You smile, feeling your heart throb at the innocent looks in your classmates' faces.

Each of you all are being called up to present your hero names and as your turn slowly comes closer, your palms begin to sweat and that feeling of not being able to stand properly hits you.

"L/n Y/n. It's your turn, come on up sweetie." Midnight calls for you, curling her fingers a few times. You stand from your seat, walking towards the front, keeping your eyes forward and looking anywhere but Katsuki's eyes.

You flip your board around. "I chose the name Tempest. It means a violent windy storm." Midnight claps her hands, "I love it! Basically telling the villains not to mess with the storm." She cheers, allowing you to walk back to your seat.

"So! Have you guys chosen an agency yet?" Mina asks, shoveling food in her mouth as Kirishima and Sero follow suit. You shrug your shoulders, "I'm having a difficult time choosing between Hawks' agency or Endeavor's agency. I want to work on my speed but then again, Endeavor's the number two. It'd be a waste to throw this chance away."

"And yet," Denki points his fork at you, "It's also a waste to throw away the chance of working with Hawks. I heard he's the youngest pro right now who has his own agency and is in the top ten."

As you were about to scold the blond for talking with his mouth full, Katsuki marches towards the table, setting his tray down before sitting down beside Kirishima. You look at the empty space beside you and your mood immediately turns sour.

Wow. Sure, he has the right to feel uncomfortable with my sudden confession but to not actually have some type of closure? You sigh, not bothering to finish your food before standing up. You slide your tray to Denki, earning a cheery mouthful 'thanks!' from him before you walk away.

You walk out the classroom upset, tired and hungry. Your mind races back to the tuna sandwhiches the cafe sold and your mouth immediately begins to water.

"Hey idiot."

All your food fantasies disappear the moment his gruff yet very warm and relaxing voice calls out to you. To make sure you weren't about to embarrass yourself, you look in front of you, searching for someone else only to be greeted by an empty hallway.

Slowly, you turn around, pressing your lips together as you look at Katsuki with the most nonchalant look you could pull, no matter how much you wanted to scowl at him.

"What's up?" You ask, mentally slapping yourself. What's up? What's up??? Who the fuck do you think you are to him, Kirishima??

He looks awaw, walking towards you. "They have new matcha cookies today. I checked before I got here."

You stand there, staring at him for a second, two seconds, five- ten- "Dumbass. Yo. Can you hear me?" Katsuki snaps his fingers in front of you, gaining your attention as he snaps you out of your daze- literally. "Well?"

As much as you want to say yes, accept his offer and just live a happy life, you didn't want to live a confusing one where you get hurt in the end. "I don't see why you have to do this, honestly." You look to your right, looking out the windows.

"We hang out, I feel like you're treating me differently than the others, I feel like I'm special to you, I recognize my feelings, and although I feel conflicted and upset I still confess my feelings to you." You grip onto your bag, "And you respond to me by what- telling me I barely know you?"

You look back at him, the corners of your lips pulled downwards sightly. "Katsuki I- I got the message, okay? Don't do whatever this is to me because from my point of view, you're leading me on cause you can't voice out or even figure out your own feelings." You motion your arms between the two of you. "If you liked hanging out with me, I'm sorry but I gotta keep some distance between the two of us before I go confessing to you again like an idiot."

You stand there, eyes dropped to the floor in silence.

Say something, you idiot! Fucking say something to me! Tell me how you feel- it doesn't matter if it'll hurt me, just say something!

"I'm sorry."

You look up at him, confused. His brows are knitted together in dejection as his shoulders sag momentarily.

You feel your eyes prickle with tears as you nod, pressing your lips together. "Okay." You click your tongue, turning away as you walked from the unnervingly quiet boy.

As you reach your apartment, the sun has already set, you're tired, your cheeks are stained and are still being stained with tears and your phone is blaring.

You answer it without another thought, Shinsou's tired and relaxed voice giving you a soft 'hey'. You can hold it in much longer as you break down into sobs.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong? Talk to me, Y/n." He sounds genuinely concerned. You sob for a few moments, letting out all the emotion you've pent up inside you as you walked back to your apartment.

"I-I just-"

Another call interrupts the two of you, making you furrow your brows. "Hold on-" You sob, your eyes scanning down your screen to see your mom calling you. You put your call with Shinsou on hold, answering your mom.

"Hey mom!" You cheer, trying to act as gleeful as possible. "Hey baby! So I heard you have a boyfriend, your aunt Miwa sent me a picture of the two of you in the paintball place? I just thought maybe you wanted to know about that boy's abrasive and violent past?"

He's not your boyfriend.

"What- you looked into him?" You yell.

"Well I had to! It's my first time my baby has a boyfriend. Anyway, I don't mean to be that mom but I don't think he's a good fit for you, honey. He's bullied countless students in middle school and after observing how he acted in the sports festival, I don't think that boy changed at all." Your mother does sound truly concerned for you but everything seemed to be too much for you today.

Before you can even think of the sentences you want to say, you hear a knock on your door. You sigh, pacing towards it as you pull it open, brows furrowing in anger at the sight of your father in front of you.

"Y/n I just want a second chance-"

You yell.

You yell out your frustrations, your sadness, your hesrtsches, everything. Every single emotion you felt today just came pouring out as you yelled from the top of your lungs.

Your body falls to the floor as your limbs begin feeling like jell-o and your head begins to spin. You hear your father ordering his guards around frantically, but his words are all muffled and unclear. You begin seeing double- seeing two of your father really isn't helping right now.

"Hey, Y/n, baby keep your eyes open for me. I'll bring you to the hospital just-"

"Can all of you just shut the fuck up for a moment?" You whisper weakly before darkness swallows you up once again.

It's cold. It's dark. You're alone.

You're always alone.

[pascalpanic]

I love your headcanons and I have a request! I'm someone who LOVES baking for my loved ones, friends and co-workers. What are your HCs for which of the Pedro boys have a sweet tooth and/or would enjoy their S/O showing affection through excellent homemade baked goods?

@sugarontherims this u?

this is so cute and also relatable so i am so excited. I’m gonna do each boy’s weakness for your baking and then a little bit about them, AND the order from top to bottom is the biggest sweet tooth to the smallest

Sweet Treats and Sweet Tooths

Javier Peña- Brownies

Javier has a crazy sweet tooth, but he hides it well. No one knows about it except you, the one who catches all the times he’ll find his way to the break room and return with crumbs in his mustache. You work with him at the embassy, and he never comments when you pull out the container of treats, but he’ll sneak one as he walks past. You call out that you saw it, and he’ll turn around with a mouthful of chocolate goodness and make a face of surprise. It’s fucking adorable. The brownies are Javier’s favorite- he loves chocolate in all forms, and the fudgy texture is so delicious that he ends up trying to copy your recipe and failing miserably. That’s how you get your first date with him: Javi tells you he just can’t get the recipe right. It’s gotta be your magic touch that makes them good. Maybe you’d show him sometime?

Marcus Pike- Red Velvet Cupcakes

Marcus adores sweet treats, but his real weakness is frosting. His favorite kind is the cream cheese stuff that you put on your red velvet cupcakes. He’s always loved the cupcakes from one specific bakery a few blocks from his D.C. apartment, but he swears there’s nothing better than yours. You make the frosting from scratch, and he rushes to your desk with a sweet but conniving smile every time someone mentions you brought treats today. “Wouldn’t happen to be-” “For the love of God, Marcus, do you want my recipe for the red velvet cupcakes?” You tease, and he grins. 

Frankie Morales- Chocolate Chip Cookies

They’re classic and sweet, just like Frankie. He loves them in any way or form, but he’s partial to cookies with melty chocolate chips. You’re always making treats to bring to the guys’ houses when you get together with the boys, and Frankie always eats more of your cookies than anyone else. You started to bring separate plates of them just for Frankie, so that the other men would get a shot at eating any of them. He still steals them from the big plate in the kitchen. He makes little happy noises when he bites into one, grinning and getting chocolate all over his face. Doesn’t matter- it’s an excuse for you to wipe the chocolate off of that cute dimple.

Agent Whiskey- Pie

Jack likes his drinks to be strong, but he prefers sweet foods over salty. This classic Southern boy loves pie! It doesn’t matter what kind- he’ll eat anything you bring in, but he’s a sucker for a custard pie. Banana cream might be his favorite if you forced him to pick, but he adores any of them. He loves to call you “cutie pie” as a pun on how much he adores your baking. Seriously, this man would quit his job if it meant he could be your full time taste-tester. He loves to stand in the kitchen, getting in your way until you give him a kiss, and stealing licks from the spoon.

Marcus Moreno- Snickerdoodles

Anita was never big on baking when Marcus was just a tiny tot with metalbending powers, but when she did, it was always snickerdoodles. Cinnamon is one of Marcus’s favorite spices- you can always tell, as his colognes always has undertones of it. He melts and it reminds him of his childhood when he bites into the fluffy cookies you brought to his desk one day. He smiled up at you and admitted that they were better than his mother’s, and he loved those a lot. He asks if, maybe, you would teach him how to bake? He wants to make sure Missy can experience those sweet moments in the kitchen like he and his mother did. Of course, you say yes. 

Din Djarin- Gingerbread Cookies 

Din has never really had the chance to eat for the fun of it. He’d become an instant foodie once he’s exposed to it, but his favorite foods are the ones full of flavor. He likes the spicy noodles you try on one planet, absolutely adores the bursting sour fruits you try on another, but your baking is something different to him. If you mix the ingredients, he and Grogu will shape the dough neatly into a little gingerbread Grogu and Mando and you. He has excellent steady hands, and he’ll pipe the details on his cookie while Grogu puts so much frosting on top it can barely hold up. He secretly prefers the one you make, with light smears of frosting and spicy red candies as eyes. 

[muilkyu]

Member  ✧  Junghwan

Series  ✧  I Love You

Word Count  ✧ 779

Genre ✧ Fluff

Warnings  ✧  None (as fluffy as fluff can be)

"Junghwan!" You yell from across the hallway running over to him.

A smile spreads across his face as you get closer. Without warning, you pull him in for a hug.

"I missed you."

He giggles as you unravel yourself for him, "You just saw me yesterday."

"Doesn't mean I can't miss you," you tell him, "I made you something." Reaching into your bag you pull out some cookies you wrapped up last night. Before you can even hand over the batch of cookies he has a hold on them.

"Wait you don't even know what flavor they are!" You scold as he struggles to open the lid. "Here you have to push on the sides of the container." You instruct.

With the lid off the smell of the peanut butter cookies fills the air, "Are they all for me?"

"Yeah, but also save some for your mom. She loved my banana bread last time."

He smiles at the mention of his mom, "Her and Dad love you. I bet she'll love them."

You blush a bit knowing that his parents like you still make you feel shy, "Just make sure she gets some," you tell him, before throwing a late response of, "I love your parents as well."

He takes a huge bite out of one of the cookies, "Oh my god is that chocolate chips?"

"Yep, it's peanut butter chocolate chip cookies which you mentioned when we baked together last time," you say, taking a cookie for yourself.

He nods smiling before taking another bite, "You remembered."

"Of course, the moment you said it I was already planning on making it. I was hoping you would like them," you reply honestly. Even though Junghwan loves everything you bake sometimes the idea of him not liking it worries you. "Okay, we should probably get going now. We'll be late if we keep standing here eating cookies."

Agreeing with you, he takes the last bite of his cookie and reaches in for a hug, "I'll see you at lunch, okay?"

"Of course, and do you want me to come to see you on break?"

"Oh I forgot about break, but yes if you want to. We can have some more cookies."

You pull back from the hug to point at the cookie tub in his hand, "Do not eat all the cookies in here. Some are for your mom."

Before he has a chance to respond the bell for class rings which startles both of you. Pulling away he quickly throws the cookie bin into his backpack.

Going in for one last hug, as usual, he said his goodbyes, "Thank you for the cookies. Come see me on break. I love you."

With the scurries of students' feet and the sound of the 1-minute bell you almost didn't hear the last part. However before you can say anything he's already running off to class, leaving you alone in the hallway.

During class, you were so distracted. When the teacher called on you and you'd been so lost that you almost did answer. Many thoughts ran through your head like, 'Was it an accident?' or 'Did he really mean it?'. You were really hoping it was the second choice, but you also didn't want to push your luck.

Later on during break as soon as the bell rings you decided you were going to go see Junghwan, but the second the bell rang louder shuffles than usual were heard from the hallway. Your tired boyfriend storms into the class catching the attention of the class. He notices all the attention on him but ignores it running towards you.

Tumbling around all the desks in the room he makes it towards you. He's panting from the running so you tell him to breathe.

"Deep breaths in and out," you say slowly demonstrating as he follows your lead.

When he comes back to breathing normally most of the class has left the room. With some either resting or scrolling mindlessly through their phone. You both happen to make eye contact with each other but look away both too shy for this conversation.

"So-" you both say at the same time. It's the biggest clique in the world and it makes you both laugh.

"I'll start," you say, nervously, "Umh, did you mean it?"

He's more nervous than you blushing, but still nods his head, "I think so."

You smile a blush high on your cheeks, "I think so too."

For the rest of the break, you both can barely look at each other without giggly, but you know that it feels right. Also, you can't deny you might be helplessly in love with Junghwan too.

I hope you enjoyed ~ this was so late because I rewrote it like yesterday lol

Read the other members confessions here!

Requests open for prom ideas only!

[whump-town]

Every day I think about baby-faced, early twenties prosecutor Hotch. Can you imagine getting sent to jail for like tax fraud or something because some twinky twentysomething with a suit that doesn’t fit quite right argues down you council? I bet Haley packed him lunch every day too, because she knows her husband forgets to eat, but he’ll eat anything Haley makes to avoid hurting her feelings. Just, barely out of law school Hotch, charcoal gray socks-ing his way through every case.

the same kid whose hair makes him look like he just got out of bed who eats peanut butter and banana sandwiches for lunch with two cookies and a goldfish crackers putting away big old bad guys and everytime he walks in they just sort of look him up and down nad have to ask why in the world would anyone be afraid of this child 

[thorniest-rose]

reddie halloween prompt #6 pumpkin

Eddie had lived in denial for a long time. It was a denial that had clung to him since he’d been a little boy. Never letting himself get dirty. Being scared of falling ill. Not letting his eyes linger too much on the handsome men he saw in the pharmacy or at the grocery store. And never letting himself enjoy food. Because food meant gluttony. It meant allergies and intolerances. It meant turning out like his mother, who he watched grow bigger and rounder every year.  

He spent years like that, not letting himself enjoy anything. Convincing himself he was so frail that all he could eat were egg whites and leafy greens or the leanest chicken with a plate of boiled vegetables. No gluten. No sugar. Hardly any fats or carbs. For more than 20 years he was as austere as a Puritan. And he told himself it was for the best. 

Until Richie, that was. Until they had finally defeated the clown. 

Things started to change then. Slowly at first but surely. Eddie left his sham of a marriage; he came out of the closet; he admitted to Richie one night, as the two of them shared a bowl of ice cream by Richie's swimming pool, that he was in love with him. And then, after he let himself try a slice of challah one day at a coffee shop downtown, toasted gently and spread with honey, Eddie let himself fall. 

First, Eddie made banana bread using some old, overripe bananas on their kitchen table. Then he baked chewy oatmeal cookies one morning after he’d served up their overnight oats. Before Eddie knew it, he was cooking up a storm: he ordered cookbooks, watched videos, bookmarked blogs. And he started to love the act of cooking. Looked forward to planning out their meals and going grocery shopping. There were fluffy ricotta pancakes in the morning; a cheese and spinach quiche with salad in the afternoon, chicken thighs baked in white wine, olive oil and parmigiano reggiano in the evening. And then, teasingly, a silky mousse or sliver of cheesecake.  

Richie, who had the biggest appetite out of anyone Eddie had ever known, scarfed down everything Eddie made as quickly as a dog. He'd been happy to see Eddie enjoy food more and actively encouraged his cooking.

What Eddie hadn't expected was how sexy Richie had found it. How he watched Eddie cook with his blue eyes lit up with some kind of mischief. Sometimes coming up behind him so he could trail his hands over Eddie’s hips as he cooked, snaking a hand around his chest to tweak a nipple through his t-shirt, or to press the flat of his palm to Eddie’s lower stomach in a vaguely territorial touch that had Eddie half-panting as he stirred. 

Eddie always kicked Richie out eventually, swatting him away with a wooden spoon or elbowing him in the stomach. But it didn't stop Eddie from growing ruby-cheeked or getting hard in his pants. Something Richie definitely noticed as he chuckled and said, "You feeling okay there, baby?"

Which is probably why he should have seen this coming. Not that he thought it would happen that morning, as he prepared a homemade pumpkin pie for the first time. That he’d end up pushed up against the counter in their spacious, airy kitchen with Richie's jeans shoved down his thighs and his cock balls deep inside Eddie's ass. 

The pie looks good. Eddie had completed the crust, and he’s busy with the filling: mixing eggs, spices and fresh pumpkin purée in a bowl. Or at least he was trying to. Because Richie’s cock was nudging his prostate, and every time Eddie tried to focus on what he was doing, Richie would tilt his hips slightly and brush up against his sweet spot.

Richie had spent the whole time cooing into his ear, telling him what a good boy he was, as he stroked Eddie's hips like he was a skittish, easily frightened domestic pet.

The whisk clatters to the counter as Eddie lets out a high-pitched moan. 

“I can’t do it,” he says, his head hanging down between his shoulders. 

Richie leans in and swipes his tongue against the bare skin at his feverish nape.

“I think you can,” he says. “Come on, baby, you’re doing so well.”

Richie hadn’t fucked him that morning like he usually did, making the excuse that he had an important Zoom meeting. That he had to get ready for some presentation with the big suits about the future of his show. Eddie had said okay, that made sense, but he couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed as Richie kissed him on the cheek and disappeared out the room. 

But it turns out this was why. Richie had been saving it for this. 

Eddie tries not to moan at how deep Richie is inside him. There’s nothing between them, not even a layer of latex, and it’s almost too much. Richie’s cock is stretching him wide - with a shiver, he can imagine how obscene his hole must look around Richie’s cock - and on each small thrust into him, Eddie can feel Richie’s balls brush against his thighs. 

“I hate you,” he mutters as his arms tremble, hands clenched so hard around the edge of the counter that they're porcelain white.

Richie tsks against his neck. “That’s not a very nice thing to say to your finance, is it? When he takes such good care of you.”

Eddie laughs, and it sounds manic. “Is this what you think taking care of me looks like?”

He expects a joke, or a witty retort. Instead what he gets is Richie’s fingers tightening to a bone-bruising grip on his hips. Eddie would cry out, goes to, except Richie shoots out a hand and shoves three thick fingers into Eddie’s mouth, stifling the sound. 

With an edge of steel Richie says, “Why don’t you stop talking back and do as you’re told?”

Eddie starts to say “okay”, only he can’t, not with Richie’s fingers in his mouth, how they press down his tongue. So he nods his head as much as he can to get the point across. He’ll make the pie. He’ll be good. 

“That's better,” Richie says.

He pushes his fingers deeper into Eddie’s mouth, getting them wet to the knuckle, the force of it making Eddie gag. It feels like a warning. That Eddie better be good because he's not in the mood to play. Then he pulls them out as fast as he’d pushed them in, bringing them back to Eddie's hip.

"Go on then," he says, but this time there's the hint of a laugh in his voice. Like he finds humiliating Eddie like this funny.

Eddie feels winded, the corners of his mouth feel bruised, but he picks up the whisk again and starts swirling the filling. It’s not as fast as he’d usually do it, but it’s the best he can do. Behind him, Richie starts to pick up the pace a little, pulling out and pushing his cock deeper into Eddie’s needy, clenching hole. He hits his prostate again, making him arch back against the tall line of Richie’s body. 

“R-Richie, I can’t,” he says, on the verge of dropping the whisk again. Of abandoning the pie and begging Richie to fuck him. 

But he knows that won't do.

From behind him Richie says, “Why don’t you shut the fuck up? I thought you could be good? Do you want me to pull out?”

Eddie shakes his head. He doesn't. Even though it was maddening: the torturous, slow push of Richie’s cock inside him, the feeling of his zipper rubbing up against his ass, the drip of precome at the end of Eddie’s dick where he’d grown flushed and hard against the counter. But the thought of Richie pulling out and leaving him there while he went to the bedroom to jerk off was even worse. He has a thought of Richie coming all over their bedsheets, of wasting his come instead of depositing it deep inside Eddie where it belonged, and he almost whines.

“No Richie, I want it so bad, please. Please don’t pull out,” he begs, in a voice he doesn’t even recognise. Something high and wanton. A voice he didn’t even know he could make until Richie laid him down on his bed one night all those months ago and pushed inside him for the first time. 

“Beautiful boy,” Richie says sweetly. “Finish it, come on,” he murmurs.

So Eddie does. As Richie continues his slow, tormenting pace, Eddie finishes whisking the filling and lifts the bowl with shaky fingers so he can pour it into the pastry shell. He almost drops it, but manages to right the bowl at the last second. Afterwards he stares at it: the beautiful, flaky, butter pastry crust with its autumnal filling, and that floaty feeling of satisfaction comes over him. He’d done good. He did exactly as Richie told him.

“I’ve done it, Richie,” he sighs, his voice sounding faraway. “I’ve finished the pie.”

He melts when Richie kisses him on the side of his neck, scraping his teeth over his pulse point where it jumps rapidly.

“I knew you could do it, Eddie, I knew you could make me happy.”

And Richie rewards him for it. With one hand he pulls Eddie’s hips back and with the other he pushes Eddie’s cheek down against the counter until Eddie's bent at an obscene angle. At a fuckable angle, Eddie thinks with a shiver. But that’s the last coherent thought he has for a long time because a moment later Richie’s pulling out until just the tip of his dick is spearing Eddie open, and then he does what Eddie’s wanted all this time. He shoves back inside, the squelch of the lube pornographically loud in their quiet kitchen, and he rails him hard, letting that hidden, ferocious side come out.

It’s the hardest fuck Eddie’s had in days, and fuck it feels so good, his ass bouncing off Richie’s sharp hips on every thrust, Richie's cock punching his tiny hole open, and the low-pitched growl coming from Richie’s throat making his dick drool at the tip.

It's something he can't believe he's denied himself for so long.

"I kind of want to eat this pumpkin pie out of you," Richie suddenly says. "Would you let me do that? Just finger it inside of your dumb cunt and then eat it out of you?"

And it shouldn't sound hot. It should sound ridiculous. But it doesn't stop Eddie from crying out or his balls drawing up.

"I'm going to-"

He cuts off on a high whine as Richie reaches around and grabs him in warning.

"You better not. Not until I say."

Eddie nods, and Richie starts fucking him again, hammering his prostate on every push inside him, muttering so filthy it makes Eddie flush all the way down to his chest.

And when Richie finally tells him to come he does, clenching around him until he shoots sticky white all over the counter. 

“Good boy,” Richie says as he pulls his cock out to smear the sticky head against the sore skin at his hole, making Eddie quiver. “Now let's go for that money shot. How much do you think you can make Daddy come?"

And Eddie, with gusto, shows him.