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rescuefield-a · 1 year

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TRUE ENDING, DARK ENDING, NEW BEGINNINGS - A STUDY IN CLAIRE AND LEON.

( because if there's one thing capflop can't do is treat women right. disclaimer: this might not be pleasant, please keep in my mind it's in relation to my portrayal and not THE truth )

let's skip all the obvious parts, we already know those. let's dive into claire's mind since by the time death island happens she considers leon her comrade in arms, even though perhaps with the way things go in canon she should be the one throwing the chair. only half joking here.

i'm gonna start by saying that i find ridiculous that claire would fuck off a few days after the outbreak - sure she's impulsive but not at these levels to go in with no plan and no actual idea of where to fly in the first place. so here's the thing, she's stayed with sherry and leon for a while before leaving, planned her search carefully with them watching her too. bonding more with sherry was a given, but she obviously shared enough pieces of information with leon as well since she knows his email.

i don't think claire ever fell head over heels for him as some in this fandom love to imply - she has eyes, and leon is easy on them. that's really all there is to see ( tho i do think her feelings might have changed slightly during their motel hopping situation, but that's more of me world building around the little that we know ) at the same time however, leaving and returning has been a disastrous experience for claire. she was definitely the first to reach out to him post rockfort - mostly to find out what happened to sherry.

on that note, i think that was what held them together at first. it is known that they had visit rights, probably showed up together sometimes, might have decided to join forces against simmons ( although it was useless ) when claire was trying to get sherry's custody. they both love sherry, they both went through hell, they both want to end it - their whole friendship is based on a promise they made to each other when they were a little more thank kids themselves. and that's probably why claire has ended up having a closer bond with leon post raccoon city; they share similarities in that way, and that's what gets them through things since apparently they keep in touch off screen ( would be fun to read more of their email exchanges )

it's obvious claire holds leon on a pedestal in a way - whereas chris was her go to person, leon sort of takes that place post rockfort. he gets contacted in harvardville, she asks his opinion about the drawing made by that kid in penamstan. she cares about him and his opinion, which is somewhat reciprocated through the little hints in canon, but at the same time we see a shift that changes things. if during the airport outbreak leon was speaking highly of claire and how she fought her way out of raccoon city, a couple years later in DC he tells her to "not do anything stupid" more than once, to which claire eventually even tells him "when are you going to stop treating me like a kid?" because claire knows very well she's capable and experienced, so her inner question when it comes to leon is why cant you see me as your equal?

i know some might have expected me to turn this into a ship moment, but it really all boils down to this. claire gets the damsel treatment over and over, to the point that even something that supposedly was fanservice becomes a moment where we can see her annoyance. she seems almost mad when leon asks her if she's fine after being picked up from the acid pool - and while she is okay, there's no doubt that leon and jason's antics have created problems during her convo with wilson, claire still gets up and goes to the control room to once again to the behind the scene work that will grant leon another tyrant kill and a pat on his shoulder by the government.

to put it simply, claire never gets praised, never gets credit, and yet she's the one doing half the work, she's the one staying behind during the aftermath, she's the one who made it possible for the government and bsaa to meet in the first place. claire might as well get into politics some day and i wouldn't be surprised, she's a leader who always gets pushed aside because she's unfortunately surrounded by a lot of toxic masculinity and very fragile egos.

so to circle back, i find it interesting that claire says "i do things my way and you do things yours" because it implies that until then they were always meeting in the middle, but it was really following leon's lead because he's supposed to know better than her. it could be implied that claire has compromised for the past decade, having a different approach to fighting the good fight than him ( leading me to think she had been influenced by neil's charm for a whole lot longer than revelations 2, he just wasn't the leader of terrasave yet so his role wasn't important for the plot but possibly formative to how claire operates ) so this is her stepping away from leon's shadow - it's her way to say ok, i've been following your lead until now, but just because you're the fighter and i'm the rescuer it doesn't mean we're not on the same level.

i also find very interesting that claire and leon seem to not have a "shared campaign" and that she has been given a weapon of her own in death island. it might not mean much in terms of plot meaning, but to me it means a lot because it's already a HUGE step forward ( until now movie wise she would always have a weapon that was either leon's or would be discarded after shooting one zombie which is ridiculous when there's a hoard of them ) toward claire having an identity of her own that is not tied to her brother, best friend, boyfriend of the day found dead at the end. this might be her biggest occasion to shine and perhaps to prove once again that she's on the same level as everybody else - her job doesn't define, her experience does... and of that let me tell you at this point she's got plenty.

to recap: claire did carry the torch for leon throughout the years and as long as the universe keeps destroying every attempt of her moving on, in a way she will always have a soft spot for him. but also if it's true that the distance makes the heart grow fonder, then the farther they stay when it comes to missios the more they'll remain in best terms ( he's still her best friend regardless, is a deal package along with sherry, she will totally host interventions but will never let people use her name to express their disappointment )

#ɢᴇɴᴇʀᴀʟ meta.#canon died in a ditch.. in the sense that i will interpret claire in these context the way god intends (me)#i actually have so much more to say but this is turning into a novel #all of this is true as well as what i write with savvvy obviously which is hilarious bc claire can't stand the whole #i have to protect you blah blah gig but also will always be available to hook up bc life's gotta be a little messy every now and then 😂#more notes about my canon died reference! it's obviously a joke and other muns portrayals are not wrong! i just don't agree with canon lol

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forsty · 2 years

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it’s 5am again and im having a very emotional moment about people liking and enjoying my art. it just truly means the world to me that people enjoy the things i draw, my silly little doodles. this isn’t even fandom specific, people are always just so nice to me and my drawings and it really melts my heart. makes me into an emotional little puddle on the floor

#forstyspeaks #crying in the club TONITE #my art is all i've got so the fact that people like it???#nothing is better than that #but that said i will always focus on drawings things FOR ME #i cant promise that i will stay in one fandom and keep drawing one thing thats just not how my brain works #i draw too many different things and all i can do is go with the flow #but it really does mean everything to me when people enjoy the things i make #brb gonna mop myself off the floor

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butcher--bird · 3 years

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I SUPPOSE ITS BEEN COMING TO THIS...

hey fellas, incase you havent seen my thread on twitter, im taking a break from twitter, from tumblr, and most importantly from this fandom. i hate drawing and i have no groove left anymore because ive made the royal mistake of only drawing MHA content. sure ill still post here sometimes, ill still draw hizashi and shouta, all the thing you all like, but im going to be focusing on art that i enjoy drawing. ive made a newgrounds account under the same name you can catch me at once i start uploadin. and as well as my deviantart also under the same name.

basically why ive decided to take a major break from the mha fandom because of all the genuinely upsetting content ive seen via twitter as well as here. im 16 going on 17 year old in2 days, i feel grossed out by adults drawing thrist traps about izuku and co who are the same age as me. but thats not the things that upsets me most, its all the rape, incest, pedophila. i cant do it anymore. i hate to be "that guy" but as a victim of all of these things i dont want to be associated with this shit anymore, everytime i open twitter im greeted by drawn child porn , incest what have you or some adult with MINORS DNI! in their bio and a disgusting name and icon following me and liking all my innocent drawings so naturally i dread opening these apps.

anywhoosies, i appreciate you reading this whoever you may be, youre cool. mutuals who want to stay in touch please dm me for my discord. i will not be responding to asks that bash me for my choice, maybe send an ask for cool things that i can draw that dont include mha, that would be better. i appreciate how highly youve all regarded me with my fanart, but i promise you i can do much, much more. ill come back with some banger erasermic fanart sometime soon. to all the big creators and bloggers whove reblogged my works everytime i posted, you the real ones and i always love seeing you in my notifs. obviously i will not be deactivating so feel free to browse my old selection of mha works. maybe ill keep writing fics too on my ao3. seeya later space cowboys!

#teeth talks

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fics-not-tragedies · 4 years

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Reckless Serenade [1]

After 84 years I finally managed to produce first part of this 7-part request submitted by @cyberpvnkss. Once again I’m really sorry it took me that long, but life’s a lil bitch sometimes. I hope this was worth the wait! Also the title of this tiny series is inspired by this song.

STORY SUMMARY: When her father passed away she started to feel lonely once again, even her mother and sister couldn’t help her with filling the hole the death of her father left in her heart and soul. So she mourns him her own way - by throwing herself into endless loop of going out and partying really hard every night. But only until she meets Santino - a man who used to work with her father that makes her feel wanted again.

Words: 3041; Warnings: smoking and drinking, nothing explicit yet; Summary: It’s another Friday night when you find yourself in the club you’ve spend most of your time after your father died. After few drinks in you meet the owner and then he starts his game of seducing you, but you’re not an easy bird to catch.

Readers tag list:

@spookier-than-u; @oreofenyloetyloamina; @derangedcupcake; @geostarr; @catsmieow; @wickedlangdon; @bodhi-black; @bugalouie; @onebatch--twobatch; @fandom-lover-4; @mikaneonox; @drunkonyellow; @spadesandaces2342; @harrisongslimited; @hhighkey; @lunilate; @i-cant-remember-my-old-login; @sgt-morgan; @coloursunlimited; @childrenofthegun; @weminiaturestrawberry; @silverlambcaptain; @scarletmoon83; @howtoruin-someones-perfect-day; @krazycags01; @charlottebonnie; @moonlit-raven-haven; @girl-at-the-verge; @boopdedoop; @jardani-jovonovich-bitch; @ladyreapermc; @wifeofdarklordsworld; @mysticfluffyness; @zombiepandajfish; @kollover24; @greenmanalishi; @jinchanyeolstolemysoul; @marytvirgin;

The floodlights hit you, flew past you through the thick air of the club, the bass of the speakers so heavy it thudded in your chest, controlling your heartbeat and you ran your fingers through your hair, brushing the sweaty strands back from your face as you danced, throwing one arm up into the air and stopping, moving slowly, almost in slow motion with everyone as the build up to the drop came creeping on, tensing the whole crowd, slowing the dancing until the beat dropped and the adrenaline took over, your body moving naturally to the music.

You’d told yourself that you’d leave after one more song, the lights would turn on soon anyway and despite the rush you felt now, you were exhausted, had worked all week and had just come to relieve some of the built up tension, relax and let go but you also desperately needed sleep.

As you reveled in the last song, you felt someone too close to you, for about the millionth time. But as you turned and looked over your shoulder, you saw a guy you hadn’t seen before, tinted sunglasses, dark blue collared shirt with a bandana around his neck covering what would’ve been visible of his chest otherwise. Despite the shades, you could see his eyes fixated on you, wandering from your face down your body as you didn’t stop swaying your hips, less space between the two of you as you lifted your arms again.

He wasn’t uncomfortably close but close enough for you to give him a gesture to move along by turning away again, but you knew he was still behind you, his head and his hips swaying to the song that was supposed to be the final to your catharsis of tonight. But he had something else in mind, smirked when you looked at him again through your lashes, licking your lips and he moved closer, your bodies still not quite touching, but you were still almost dancing against him now and one of his hands hovered just above your hip, not quite as if he was going touch you but ready to do so in the case that it would become an appropriate thing to do but right now, just blocking your way to keep his little game going.

There was something about him, a certain vibe that no one had given you before, he was clearly interested, confident about it and not shy to show you but at the same time had something somewhat respectful, wasn’t putting his hands on you or needed a cheesy line, his eyes did all the talking, he didn’t need to tell you he liked your tight jeans or your eyes or how you moved, his eyes said it all, eyeing, eating you up with the look behind those glasses. And he still didn’t move away, clearly wanting to play.

So you turned around fully, stepping closer to him and smirking when he slowly took off his shades, licking his lips. The light hit his face for just a moment, his big brown eyes resting on yours and you reached out for the glass in his hand which he gave up easily, taking a sip as you held his gaze, seeing him move closer and you licked your lips before you handed it back, the strong liquor burning down your throat as you kept a straight face, eyes locked with his.

He bit his bottom lip, the look in his eyes so intense that it added to the thrill you already felt from the music, no one looking at you having had quite the effect on you that his gaze did. You were still moving in tune with the beat absolutely naturally, somewhat in control of yourself until he leaned in, his breath tickling your neck and sending shivers down your spine, his voice surprisingly deep, waking a deep desire in the pit of your stomach.

“Let me take you out of here.”

You laughed, but the sound was muffled by the music. Leaning in you breathed into his ear, “Not tonight.” He was surprised, the puzzled look on his face, the raised eyebrow, the confident smirk now swept away from his face, all shown that it wasn’t the answer he expected to get from you. So instead of saying anything else you just patted his shoulder and walked off the dancefloor heading over to the bar.

Sitting on the bar stool you waved over to Jameson who was busy serving drinks to some other people and he just gave you a silent nod, meaning that you’d have to wait for your turn.

There was a sudden fuss going around in the background, some people were leaving the place in a hurry, some other were badly hiding the exchange of their whispers. Then the whole club was swarmed with broad men dressed in similar suits, their eyes carefully scanning the room for potential threat.

“The boss is here” Jameson finally approached you, placing three shot glasses in front of you and filled them with liquor.

The first one went swiftly, but as you took another one, you sighed loudly, wondering if maybe you should have stayed home. But then again, getting drunk… wasn’t that what you were supposed to do after another bad break up?

Yes. Yes, it was. But it had been a while. And if you were honest with yourself, you weren’t having one shot of vodka after another, because you couldn’t get over your break up. It was more the feeling of loneliness that had settled in now, you’d been alone for a while and you had thought you’d be comfortable with it and of course, it had its upsides. There was no one that you had to pay attention to but yourself, no compromises.

But you liked doing that, you liked taking care of somebody, working together and giving and receiving support. So what you were really upset about and five shots in over was the fact that you were alone and that you didn’t want to be. And most of all, the fear that it’d stay that way.

It wasn’t the kind of loneliness that come to you when you have no one left here on Earth. You had a loving mother and a pair of siblings, but after your father passed away every other day after that moment was just simply bleak. No one really knew how much you’ve missed him. You were the youngest, his little princess as he always called you. But he was gone now and there wasn’t any man nor any amount of liquor that could fill in the massive rupture that was now located in the spot of your chest, the one where your heart was previously in. They didn’t let you see him, there was no open coffin, no time to hold his hand for the last time or playfully stroke your fingers through his beard like you always did when you two spent time together. All you got was the urn with his ashes and his death certificate.

You ran your fingers through your hair before hopping off the bar stool, instantly feeling unstable on your feet. Wasn’t it always that way? You didn’t think you were that drunk, but as soon as you weren’t sitting anymore, your balance would betray you.

Wobbling to the bathroom, you tried to hold on wherever you could, embarrassing yourself a few times when you stumbled into the back of someone’s chair or bumped accidentally against somebody’s arm. You cursed yourself under your breath for allowing yourself to get carried away, finally making it to the bathroom.

As expected, there were two or three women already waiting for their turn and you sighed, leaning back against the door frame, holding the door open carefully. One of the women coming out of the stalls gave you a worried look and probably wondered if you were by yourself.

Yes, you were by yourself. But you had been here by yourself multiple times, be it on a night like this, or after friends had already gone home. The bartender knew you enough to recognize you and some of the other regulars also looked familiar.

Once you were done and came out of the stall once it finally was your turn, you washed your hands and also sprayed some cold water into your face to freshen up. There was no make up you could wash away and your bare face was completely on display. But at least your waterproof mascara kept its promise. The music was much quieter now, it almost seemed like they’ve installed an orchestra somewhere around the LED beams.

You stumbled, but managed to not draw any attention to yourself and sat back down, ordering some whisky. Jameson gave you a worried look and you just sighed.

“I don’t want another lecture. Not from you. Not tonight” you mumbled to him, leaning over the bar, running your hand through your hair again and again, “I have enough of them when I come home, trust me…”

“Alright” he said, placing an empty glass in front of you with a thud, “But it’s your last one” Jameson stated matter-of-factly before filling the whole glass with whisky.

“You’ve said that four shots earlier…” wiggling out your cigarette case from your narrow handbag you took out one from the three that were left inside and put it between your lips. Jameson placed a clean ashtray next to your drink and before you even could reach inside your bag to fish out a lighter, a suit clad arm reached out from you holding out a lit Zippo.

“Listen to your bartender” the man whose arm it was spoke, “He’s a really good one” when your cigarette was lit he closed the lighter with a click you turned to the side, so you could have a better look at him.

The dark curls on the sides of his head were freshly shaven, the top part now tamed with a tad bit of gel. His whole face was smiling at you, his blue eyes lit, beaming at you, the gentle creases around his nose visible, the corners of his mouth curled upwards, “Perhaps I should give him a raise” the man spoke again, raising his own glass towards Jameson and you could pick up the hint of an accent that lingered on few words here and there. He was still smiling and there wasn’t any force on Earth that could’ve stopped you from mimicking the gesture, your own lips, still partially covered in red lipstick, curled up in a smile.

When his eyes fell back on you his smile grew even wider, “What do you think about that, bella?” He asked you, leaning closer, before he fished out his own pack of cigarettes and placed one between his lips lighting it straight away, “Do you think our beloved Jameson deserve a raise?” The man blew the smoke away from your face, pinching the cigarette between his fingers few times. Jameson just sighed and moved to the new customers on your right side.

“Of course he does” you took a drag from your cig and leaned your head on your opened hand, “Jameson is the best one I’ve ever had the chance of meeting” you added quickly taking your glass in the left hand and exhaling the smoke to the side.

“So we’ve made a decision - he gets a raise” the man stated before bumping his glass against yours playfully, “I guess you know what you’re saying, bella, I’ve noticed that you’ve become our regular.”

“Our?” You raised your eyebrow at him taking another drag from your cigarette.

“You don’t know who I am, do you, bella?” He wet his lips before mimicking your action.

“Should I?” You questioned him, taking a big gulp from your drink and he let out a little laugh, “All I can tell now that you’re a very handsome man, who likes fancy suits, has a bad habit of smoking and is apparently an Italian, mister…?”

“Santino” he replied, quickly scooping up your hand that let go of the glass into his own and pressed a soft kiss to the top of your hand.

“And a gentleman” you added with a playful smirk on your face.

“And the owner of this place. And few other ones in this city.”

“So, you’re a businessman?” Santino let go of your hand, so you could took another sip of your drink.

“If you put it this way… yes, I am, bella.”

“Why do you keep calling me the name of a Disney princess?”

He laughed again, “It means ‘beautiful’ in Italian.”

“You think I’m beautiful?” You questioned his words.

“I do” his fingers brushed against your hand that was now flicking the cigarette into the ashtray.

“Gosh, you must be more drunk than I am…” you rolled your eyes causing him to let out a little huff.

“I know beauty when I see it, trust me on that” Santino winked at you and you felt the blush that crept onto your chest. You stubbed out the cigarette into the ashtray and he gently took your hand in his, “What would you say about late dinner?” He asked, stubbing out his own cigarette, before he enveloped your hand in both his hands.

“I don’t go to dinners with strangers” you responded, moving your hand away from his grip, “Even with the handsome ones.”

“Look at all of my guards in here… you’d be safe around me, bella, I can guarantee.”

“Not if you are the dangerous one” you pointed with your finger toward his chest and he gently grasped your wrist, “men like you are the lethal weapon, with all the wit and all the money… you could have anything and anyone…”

“Perhaps I am the lethal weapon, bella, but I’m also the conservatore, the… curator of beauty. And I simply like to be around beautiful things and beautiful women.”

“Then you should find one.”

“Oh, bella…” Santino lifted your hand up to his face, his nose brushing against your skin as he smelled the faded scent of your perfume, “You act like you don’t own any mirrors.”

“I own a few. And I-I know how to use them…” your lips trembled when he gracefully kissed the inside of your wrist, his lips lingering there for more than they should.

“What perfume do you use, amore?” He asked you and you rolled your lower lip between your teeth when he looked up at you, the sultry stare almost undressing.

“The brand is called Bulgari… my dad always brought me a bottle from his business trips.”

“Italian profumo…” he smelled your wrist again, “That’s why it smell so familiar. It suits you more than well, bella. You’d look stunning in nothing but this scent.”

Santino toyed with your wrist again, his gentle touches, the movements of his fingers releasing a spark of excitement that ran up and down your spine caused a sudden shiver. You could feel your heart thudding against your rib cage and breathing somehow got harder, so you decided to cover your sudden excitement with another sip taken from your glass.

“You’re pulse runs like a wild levriero…” he stated like it was more than obvious and he wasn’t surprised by the fact that his presence had such an impact on you. Covering your alcohol induced embarrassment behind a giggle you let go of your glass and moved your hand to his that laid on top of the bar, the movement not going unnoticed by his guards as they moved closer to you two in a rush, but he waved them off with a nod of his head.

You carefully tucked his watch down, trying not to scratch it with your nails since it looked more expensive than your entire house, and you pressed your index and middle finger to the inside of his wrist.

“Seems like your pulse wants to catch up with mine…” breathing out you slowly lifted his hand, so you could examine it up close just like he did with yours, “What perfume are you using?” You asked him, leaning in to smell his wrist, but there wasn’t any scent on his skin there.

“You’d have to smell my neck, bella” he rasped, lifting your hand to his face and you tapped your fingers against his jaw.

“I doubt it’s wise in this current… position” you caressed his hand with yours, while fingers of the other one danced on his cheek, “I don’t want to be tasered by your broad guys.”

“Many things we do aren’t wise, yet we still commit to them. Come, bella” he gestured you to got up from the bar stool, while his hand let go of yours that rested against your cheek and moved to loosen up the tie along with the first button of his white shirt.

“Do you let everyone smell your perfume that easily?” You asked, sliding yourself off the seat, hesitant to move closer to him. Santino laughed, his arm looping around your waist gently pulling you closer, as you clutch onto his wrist.

“No, only the special women, like you.”

You stumbled towards him, but his arm around you was there to give you balance. When you were close enough you just rested your hands on his chest, looking up into the pair of piercing eyes that was scanning your every movement, every little gesture.

“What makes you think that I’m special? It’s much easier to get a call girl than try to seduce a random woman at a club you own.”

“I’m well aware that in the twenty first century the art of seducing someone is long forgotten, yet I never was a fan of brothels.”

“And I am not a whore” you leaned in to mumble into his ear, before grabbing your purse and simply walking away from him.

“That was not my point!” Santino shouted after you, so you stopped and turned around, so you could look at him.

“It seemed like it was. Make your intentions clearer the next time.”

“Will there be a next time, bella?” He took a sip from his glass.

“See for yourself tomorrow, Santino.”

#Reckless Serenade #reckless serenade [1]#santino d'antonio #santino d'antonio fanfiction #santino d'antonio fanfic #santino d'antonio fic #santino d'antonio imagine #santino d'antonio parted fic #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #imagine #parted series #santino d'antonio x reader #santino d'antonio/reader #santino x reader #santino/reader #rs:parted_fic

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littlebitoffanfic · 5 years

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Coffee and Hot Chocolate

Fandom: House of Wax Characters: Lester,

Relationship: Lester/reader Request: would you write for Lester? Something angsty but fluffy No matter how many times you went to the twins house, you always left feeling degraded and useless. Sitting in the pick up truck with your head resting on the window as Lester drove. He knew you were upset, but lacked any sort of social skills to try and speak properly to you. The previous times, he had tried but ended up making you more upset. So now he kept silent. Vincent was never an issue. In fact, he was the only reason you ever agreed to go to their house. He was always sweet to you, silently offering you everything from water to a meal. It was Bo who made you resent everything about your new life. He hated you with a passion. You hadn’t came here on purpose. In fact, you had been dragged kicking and screaming. You had been kidnapped and thrown in a trunk. You had spent a few days there before Lester found you. They had been run off the road as per normal and Lister had been rummaging through their belongings while the other 3 had went to find Bo. But you had thought they were back. You had kicked the trunk, expecting for them to snap at you to shut up. But you certainly hadn’t been expecting the boot to open. He had looked just as surprised as you had. To this day, you don’t know how Lester persuaded Bo to let him keep you. But that was how you ended up living with him. His home was in the middle of the forest and, if you were completely honest with yourself, you loved it. His cabin looked small from the outside but had 3 bedrooms, a large living room and kitchen as well as a dinning room. You had your own room. In the beginning, you had been kept there, with bars on the window. But it was better than a car boot. Plus, Lester was honestly a sweetheart to you. At the start, you had made a plan to take advantage by earning his trust and then running when he gave you the chance. But you never had. Not that you didn’t have his trust. You no longer had bars on the window and you were free to road the house as you pleased. But you felt more at home with him than you ever had anywhere in the world. And Lester truly did seem to care about you and your wellbeing. He tried his best to keep you happy, like you were a pet rather than a room mate. But you never understood one thing. Why he had never made any advances on you. It sounded truly stupid, and you hated how you longed for his touch. But you were sure he wanted you. You saw how his eyes glanced to your thighs when he was driving and you were wearing a skirt. you saw how he seemed to blush and became jittery at your touch. But nothing ever happened. And you couldn’t understand it. pulling up outside the house, you got out and closed the truck door. Lester was quick to unlock his house and you followed him inside. But you couldn’t stop the question from falling from your lips. “Why did you keep me?” You suddenly ask, your brow furrowed as you stared at the ground. “What?” Lester didn’t catch your question, but smiled sweetly at you. “Why keep me? Im useless.” You ask again. “look, don’t listen to Bo. He talks out-“ Lester shakes his head but you notice something change within him. “Hes right. I cant do anything. Im useless to you. Just another mouth to feed.” You throw your arms up as your voice raised. “Now hang on. I aint argued with Bo for god knows how long for you to start too.” He shakes his head, confirming your suspicion. Bo still didn’t like you were here, and he was still trying to convince Lester to kill you. And, unfortunately, you two were now taking your anger out on each other. “Why fight with him? Why keep me here?” you gesture to the room. “Just kill me like you kill everyone else.” “I aint doing that!” He growls back at you, and for the first time you could see the anger in his eyes. “Why not!?” You scream, your eyes filled with tears as you broke. “Cause I damn well said so!” He yells, raising his voice at you for the first time as he threw the hat on the floor in anger. You flinched, any anger dropping from your body as you backed away from him. You dropped your gaze, becoming more submissive as you shrunk into yourself and wrapped your arms around you. tears pooled in your eyes, spilling down your cheeks as you pressed yourself against the wall. You could see him through the tears as he scooped up his hat, ringing it in his hands as he stuttered a few times. “[y/n]?” He whispered as he darted to you, reaching out to you but he was too quick and it gave you a fright. You moved out of his reach, turned and ran into your room. You pressed yourself against the door once it was closed, expecting him to come and bang on the door, demanding you open it. But he never did. You heard him follow but he faltered at the door. Sliding down the door, you broke down. With your legs pulled up to your chest and your arms wrapped around them, you cried. Sobs fell from your lips, muffled as your head fell forward and rested on your arms. Footsteps from the other side of the door made you jump as you heard Lester running away. For a few minuets, you were left to cry in peace before he returned. “[y/n]? I got hot chocolate, and them chocolates you like. And some tissues.” His voice was shaking as you sat up, sniffing as you turned your head in confusion. “I’ll leave ‘em outside for yah. I’ll be in my room if you need anythin’” His footsteps retreated, and you heard his door open and close. After a few moment, you pushed yourself off the ground and opened the door, peering out. On the ground was a hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows in your favourite cup, along with a bar of your favourite chocolates and a fresh box of tissues. You glance down the hall way towards Lesters room and felt a rush of guilt. Yes, he had yelled at you, but you were yelling at him. And he didn’t throw his hat at you or ever shown any aggression towards you. The second he realised you were upset, he tried to comfort you. Kneeling down, you picked up a tissue, wiping your eyes. IN truth, you were more confused than ever. Picking up the tissues and chocolate, you placed them inside your room before picking up the hot chocolate. You had to make amends with Lester in the morning. But tonight, you’d enjoy the sweetness of the drink. -----Time skip -----You always woke before Lester. You had heard him pacing long into the night before you drifted off. But this morning, you knew what you wanted to do to make things better. Walking to the kitchen, you filled the kettle and took out two fresh cups. Using the freshly boiled kettle, made Lester a coffee. You knew how he liked it; sweet. You also made yourself a cup of tea. Grabbing a packed of his favourite biscuits from the cupboard, you tiptoes along to his room. There was a small set of draws just outside his bedroom which he used to store knickknacks. you placed the cup and biscuits down directly opposite his room on the draws, hoping he wouldn’t miss it. You could hear the soft snoring coming from his room, so you’d knock a few times until you hear it stop. you retreat away from the door to the kitchen, leaning against the counter as you sipped your own hot drink. You heard his door open, followed by the muscle of the packet. Then footsteps. Looking up, you saw Lester walk into the kitchen. He must have not been expecting you, as he freezes just as he was about to raise the coffee to his lips. He looked awful. Dark bags under his eyes, his hair tousled, and he was still wearing the same clothes from yesterday. You felt your heart break. “Morning.” You smiled, taking a sip of your tea. “Mornin’.” Lester placed his cup on the side, and you noticed his hands were shaking slightly. “about last night, I’m sor-“ he didn’t get to finish his sentence as you placed your own cup down on the side. rushing forward, you wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. He froze, his breath hitching in his throat before his arms cautiously snaked around your waist. You were sure you felt a shiver run through his body at the contact. This was the most intimate you had ever been with him. “I’m sorry, too.” You whispered to him, smiling. “I’ll take yah back.” His voice shook as he spoke, making you pull back and tilt your head in curiosity. You saw a smile flash across his face but the ache in his eyes was unmissable. He stepped back, and you let your arms fall from his shoulders before he walked past you. “To the real world. I’ll take you back if yah promise not to tell anyone about us.” He walks up to the window, glancing out to his trust before back to you. You stood with your mouthing hanging open, staring at him. He was serious, he was offering you your freedom back. And yet, you found yourself backing away. “I-I don’t want to go back.” You spluttered, shaking your head. “what?” He wipes around, the confusion evident on his face. “I don’t want to go back to my old life. I want to stay here with you.” You blink, unsure why he would offer such a thing. Lester twists around. “Why?” You could see the utter bewilderment on his face. “Because, because.” You close your eyes and take a deep breath. It was now or never. “Because I love you.” he stands there for a moment, his mouth opened to say something but nothing came out. You started to panic, thinking you’d taken it too far. Maybe he didn’t think if you like that, maybe you were just a friend to him. “me?” He breathes, holding his hand up and pointing to himself. You nod, ringing your hands together. He seems to struggle with this information as he steps forward. “As in like romantically?” He tilts his head, unsure of himself. You couldn’t help but smile. He was truly so clueless of your feelings? You saw something in his eyes though. It was hope. Closing the distance, you press your lips to his own. He was eager to return your kiss, if somewhat inexperienced. You felt him raise his hands but never felt them on your body. Curiously, you pulled away and glanced down, only to see them hovering over your sides, shaking. You couldn’t help but smile. He was so sweet. taking his hands, you place them on your hips before looking back up to him. Your own arms wrapped around his shoulders and you felt him pull you closer. He glanced at your lips for a moment, before ducking down then pausing a few centimetres away, as if making sure it was okay. You grinned, but kissed his again. You could feel how hard his heart was hammering in his chest, and it made your own miss a beat as you both pulled back. “you wanna go for a drive?” He suddenly asks, standing bold upright as the idea hit him. “sure.” You giggle, nodding. You loved his excitement to spend time with you. “Theres a diner out past the main road. Could take you there and get a coffee.” He offers, and immediately sees your expressions drop. By all accounts, you were missing. “Oh, the owner don’t care about us. Plus, it aint like you’re tied in the back of the car. They don’t like police or nothing so they wont say anything.” “Okay then. It’s a date.” You smile with a nod. He pulls away from you, grabs your hand and pulls you out of the house and into his truck. Fastening your seatbelt, Lester climbing into the driver side. Once you were off the bumpy road to his house, you saw him glance at your lap, and his hand twitched as he rested it on the gear stick even though he wasn’t changing gears. Smiling, you reached out. Intertwining your fingers with his own, you pull his hand to your lap and let it sit on your thigh. Lester glances at your lap, as if to make sure it truly was happening before the goofiest grin crossed his face. He rubbed his thumb across the soft flesh there before giving an experimental squeeze. You couldn’t help but smile, leaning across and kissing his cheek. You couldn’t wait for your little coffee date. Fandom: House of Wax Characters: Lester, Relationship: Lester/reader Request: would you write for Lester? Something angsty but fluffy No matter how many times you went to the twins house, you always left feeling degraded and useless. Sitting in the pick up truck with your head resting on the window as Lester drove. He knew you were upset, but lacked any sort of social skills to try and speak properly to you. The previous times, he had tried but ended up making you more upset. So now he kept silent. Vincent was never an issue. In fact, he was the only reason you ever agreed to go to their house. He was always sweet to you, silently offering you everything from water to a meal. It was Bo who made you resent everything about your new life. He hated you with a passion. You hadn’t came here on purpose. In fact, you had been dragged kicking and screaming. You had been kidnapped and thrown in a trunk. You had spent a few days there before Lester found you. They had been run off the road as per normal and Lister had been rummaging through their belongings while the other 3 had went to find Bo. But you had thought they were back. You had kicked the trunk, expecting for them to snap at you to shut up. But you certainly hadn’t been expecting the boot to open. He had looked just as surprised as you had. To this day, you don’t know how Lester persuaded Bo to let him keep you. But that was how you ended up living with him. His home was in the middle of the forest and, if you were completely honest with yourself, you loved it. His cabin looked small from the outside but had 3 bedrooms, a large living room and kitchen as well as a dinning room. You had your own room. In the beginning, you had been kept there, with bars on the window. But it was better than a car boot. Plus, Lester was honestly a sweetheart to you. At the start, you had made a plan to take advantage by earning his trust and then running when he gave you the chance. But you never had. Not that you didn’t have his trust. You no longer had bars on the window and you were free to road the house as you pleased. But you felt more at home with him than you ever had anywhere in the world. And Lester truly did seem to care about you and your wellbeing. He tried his best to keep you happy, like you were a pet rather than a room mate. But you never understood one thing. Why he had never made any advances on you. It sounded truly stupid, and you hated how you longed for his touch. But you were sure he wanted you. You saw how his eyes glanced to your thighs when he was driving and you were wearing a skirt. you saw how he seemed to blush and became jittery at your touch. But nothing ever happened. And you couldn’t understand it. pulling up outside the house, you got out and closed the truck door. Lester was quick to unlock his house and you followed him inside. But you couldn’t stop the question from falling from your lips. “Why did you keep me?” You suddenly ask, your brow furrowed as you stared at the ground. “What?” Lester didn’t catch your question, but smiled sweetly at you. “Why keep me? Im useless.” You ask again. “look, don’t listen to Bo. He talks out-“ Lester shakes his head but you notice something change within him. “Hes right. I cant do anything. Im useless to you. Just another mouth to feed.” You throw your arms up as your voice raised. “Now hang on. I aint argued with Bo for god knows how long for you to start too.” He shakes his head, confirming your suspicion. Bo still didn’t like you were here, and he was still trying to convince Lester to kill you. And, unfortunately, you two were now taking your anger out on each other. “Why fight with him? Why keep me here?” you gesture to the room. “Just kill me like you kill everyone else.” “I aint doing that!” He growls back at you, and for the first time you could see the anger in his eyes. “Why not!?” You scream, your eyes filled with tears as you broke. “Cause I damn well said so!” He yells, raising his voice at you for the first time as he threw the hat on the floor in anger. You flinched, any anger dropping from your body as you backed away from him. You dropped your gaze, becoming more submissive as you shrunk into yourself and wrapped your arms around you. tears pooled in your eyes, spilling down your cheeks as you pressed yourself against the wall. You could see him through the tears as he scooped up his hat, ringing it in his hands as he stuttered a few times. “[y/n]?” He whispered as he darted to you, reaching out to you but he was too quick and it gave you a fright. You moved out of his reach, turned and ran into your room. You pressed yourself against the door once it was closed, expecting him to come and bang on the door, demanding you open it. But he never did. You heard him follow but he faltered at the door. Sliding down the door, you broke down. With your legs pulled up to your chest and your arms wrapped around them, you cried. Sobs fell from your lips, muffled as your head fell forward and rested on your arms. Footsteps from the other side of the door made you jump as you heard Lester running away. For a few minuets, you were left to cry in peace before he returned. “[y/n]? I got hot chocolate, and them chocolates you like. And some tissues.” His voice was shaking as you sat up, sniffing as you turned your head in confusion. “I’ll leave ‘em outside for yah. I’ll be in my room if you need anythin’” His footsteps retreated, and you heard his door open and close. After a few moment, you pushed yourself off the ground and opened the door, peering out. On the ground was a hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows in your favourite cup, along with a bar of your favourite chocolates and a fresh box of tissues. You glance down the hall way towards Lesters room and felt a rush of guilt. Yes, he had yelled at you, but you were yelling at him. And he didn’t throw his hat at you or ever shown any aggression towards you. The second he realised you were upset, he tried to comfort you. Kneeling down, you picked up a tissue, wiping your eyes. IN truth, you were more confused than ever. Picking up the tissues and chocolate, you placed them inside your room before picking up the hot chocolate. You had to make amends with Lester in the morning. But tonight, you’d enjoy the sweetness of the drink. -----Time skip -----You always woke before Lester. You had heard him pacing long into the night before you drifted off. But this morning, you knew what you wanted to do to make things better. Walking to the kitchen, you filled the kettle and took out two fresh cups. Using the freshly boiled kettle, made Lester a coffee. You knew how he liked it; sweet. You also made yourself a cup of tea. Grabbing a packed of his favourite biscuits from the cupboard, you tiptoes along to his room. There was a small set of draws just outside his bedroom which he used to store knickknacks. you placed the cup and biscuits down directly opposite his room on the draws, hoping he wouldn’t miss it. You could hear the soft snoring coming from his room, so you’d knock a few times until you hear it stop. you retreat away from the door to the kitchen, leaning against the counter as you sipped your own hot drink. You heard his door open, followed by the muscle of the packet. Then footsteps. Looking up, you saw Lester walk into the kitchen. He must have not been expecting you, as he freezes just as he was about to raise the coffee to his lips. He looked awful. Dark bags under his eyes, his hair tousled, and he was still wearing the same clothes from yesterday. You felt your heart break. “Morning.” You smiled, taking a sip of your tea. “Mornin’.” Lester placed his cup on the side, and you noticed his hands were shaking slightly. “about last night, I’m sor-“ he didn’t get to finish his sentence as you placed your own cup down on the side. rushing forward, you wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. He froze, his breath hitching in his throat before his arms cautiously snaked around your waist. You were sure you felt a shiver run through his body at the contact. This was the most intimate you had ever been with him. “I’m sorry, too.” You whispered to him, smiling. “I’ll take yah back.” His voice shook as he spoke, making you pull back and tilt your head in curiosity. You saw a smile flash across his face but the ache in his eyes was unmissable. He stepped back, and you let your arms fall from his shoulders before he walked past you. “To the real world. I’ll take you back if yah promise not to tell anyone about us.” He walks up to the window, glancing out to his trust before back to you. You stood with your mouthing hanging open, staring at him. He was serious, he was offering you your freedom back. And yet, you found yourself backing away. “I-I don’t want to go back.” You spluttered, shaking your head. “what?” He wipes around, the confusion evident on his face. “I don’t want to go back to my old life. I want to stay here with you.” You blink, unsure why he would offer such a thing. Lester twists around. “Why?” You could see the utter bewilderment on his face. “Because, because.” You close your eyes and take a deep breath. It was now or never. “Because I love you.” he stands there for a moment, his mouth opened to say something but nothing came out. You started to panic, thinking you’d taken it too far. Maybe he didn’t think if you like that, maybe you were just a friend to him. “me?” He breathes, holding his hand up and pointing to himself. You nod, ringing your hands together. He seems to struggle with this information as he steps forward. “As in like romantically?” He tilts his head, unsure of himself. You couldn’t help but smile. He was truly so clueless of your feelings? You saw something in his eyes though. It was hope. Closing the distance, you press your lips to his own. He was eager to return your kiss, if somewhat inexperienced. You felt him raise his hands but never felt them on your body. Curiously, you pulled away and glanced down, only to see them hovering over your sides, shaking. You couldn’t help but smile. He was so sweet. taking his hands, you place them on your hips before looking back up to him. Your own arms wrapped around his shoulders and you felt him pull you closer. He glanced at your lips for a moment, before ducking down then pausing a few centimetres away, as if making sure it was okay. You grinned, but kissed his again. You could feel how hard his heart was hammering in his chest, and it made your own miss a beat as you both pulled back. “you wanna go for a drive?” He suddenly asks, standing bold upright as the idea hit him. “sure.” You giggle, nodding. You loved his excitement to spend time with you. “Theres a diner out past the main road. Could take you there and get a coffee.” He offers, and immediately sees your expressions drop. By all accounts, you were missing. “Oh, the owner don’t care about us. Plus, it aint like you’re tied in the back of the car. They don’t like police or nothing so they wont say anything.” “Okay then. It’s a date.” You smile with a nod. He pulls away from you, grabs your hand and pulls you out of the house and into his truck. Fastening your seatbelt, Lester climbing into the driver side. Once you were off the bumpy road to his house, you saw him glance at your lap, and his hand twitched as he rested it on the gear stick even though he wasn’t changing gears. Smiling, you reached out. Intertwining your fingers with his own, you pull his hand to your lap and let it sit on your thigh. Lester glances at your lap, as if to make sure it truly was happening before the goofiest grin crossed his face. He rubbed his thumb across the soft flesh there before giving an experimental squeeze. You couldn’t help but smile, leaning across and kissing his cheek. You couldn’t wait for your little coffee date.

#lester sinclair #lester #lester x reader #lester Sinclair x reader

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janthonyashtoreth · 5 years

Text

Another big batch of asks!

Answering a bunch of asks under the cut! Most of them are ink and flowers centric. I hope you all are doing well <3

anonymous asked: wait wait hold up Anathema works in Azra's tattoo parlour?? amazing, when i was thinking of making my own florist/tattoo artist au, i also had Anathema be Aziraphale's apprentice :D i like when these two are friends. do you have any more headcanons about Anathema in ink and flowers?

she does!! she was doing an apprenticeship under him but has since graduated to doing her own thing (but she still works at his parlor). i can’t get into the whole plot because spoilers but angels/demons and agnes nutter’s prophecies still exist in the iaf universe, but anathema isn’t her descendant. instead, anathema is a wickedly smart computer genius and her boyfriend newt is an endearing but kind of inept descendent of agnes. anathema was azra’s good friend-turned-wingwoman once anthony shows up. i love her

anonymous asked: concept: aziraphale seeing crowley presenting femininely for the first time how'd you think he'd react? in your flower shop tattoo artist au

anonymous asked: OKAY totally not asking bc i may or may not have been thinkin abt this for like. too long. but would anthony have to like, come out as genderfluid to azra/how would azra react to seeing anthony present more fem for the first time

ooo ive been thinking about this as well! i dont think anthony would necessarily have a “coming out moment”, they just kind of do what they want. if they feel like presenting fem or using different pronouns they would just. do it. and azra would just kind of roll with it. i like to think that the first time anthony presented fem she got all dressed up for date night and didn’t tell azra and azra just Stares bc,,,, wow anthony is just gorgeous like that!! azra’s dead!!!

anonymous asked: You're a cutie pie. That's it. That's the fact.

:’ ) you’re a sweety pie!!!

anonymous asked: i deadass tried for 20 minutes to make the finger heart...... how did your friend do it......

i have absolutely no idea and it hurts my brain,,,

anonymous asked: Wahoo

wahoo.....

@alligatorsnbats asked: OK, so what's Oscar's thoughts on Anthony?

oscar LOVES anthony... he’s the worlds most apathetic cat but he actively seeks anthony out when hes around. azra is only slightly salty about it

anonymous asked: Is Anthony cross eyed?

he’s not! i made him a little bit cross-eyed in my latest post on purpose bc he was flustered but i dont know if it came across very well ;;

anonymous asked: not to be *THAT* bitch who comes into your ask box and gushes over your art but i love the way you colour things and your clean line work?? mwah. i wish i could draw like you its just so lovely

bfdkjfdh im cry,,,, just keep practicing my friend!!! i promise it’ll get you where you want to go. the last couple of months have been really nice for me in my ~art journey~ because its the first time i’ve ever really liked stuff that i’ve drawn. ive been drawing for about 7-8 years and this is only just happening and it varies so much from person to person!! some people get to where they want to go in 2 years, some people take 20. just don’t stop practicing!!

anonymous asked: your human!crowley deserves infinite appreciation and the fact that he has coloboma: that right there! is! good shit! he has snake eyes,,,, but as a human. u are a genius good sir and your art is a blessing 👌👌👌

haha thank you!! i think coloboma (i know how to spell it now!!) is such an interesting condition and it’s kind of underused for human aus!!! its so dope!!!

@bolitakawaii-senpai asked: what would crowley's and azi's fav emojies from the cursed emojis??

asking the real questions out here..... i think crowley’s would be the one with all of the teeth and aziraphale’s (assuming he knows what they are in the first place) would be the really cute one with big eyes and the pink hairbow

anonymous asked: concept for the ink and flowers au: something happens to crowley (imma b honest i have no idea) and has a lowkey crisis and chops all his hair off and just. joins his pet snake and snakes around the nursery untill azra comes in seeing crowley crying and cuddling his snake and yeah idk enjoy my the weird shit my brain comes up with

jhuyhaijodfaydgsihfujoi RIP TO THE HAIR...... i love the angst potential (and i can come up with a few reasons for the angst, but i digress) but i dont think i could part with anthony’s hair,,, i love it too much

anonymous asked: I can't handle your ink and flowers Aziraphale. I can't. His hair is TOO fluffy. His face is TOO squishy. He is EXTREMELY friend shaped. His glasses and his eyes are bright like SPARKLES. Every time I see him I want to go feral and show all my friends. I would hug him without letting go of given the chance. 1000000000/10. 💜🐝

anonymous asked: I have a cat just like Oscar (big himbo) and I got him some knit hats for Christmas and he's gonna hate me but I can't wait to dress him up like a little bee so: does Azra ever give Oscar like costumes or footies just for fun? If yes, does Oscar love or hate? 💜🐝

isldakfj im grouping these two together bc im assuming ur the same person anon!! i love your signature!!

you’re correct. his hair IS too fluffy, and he IS entirely too friend shaped. he has the BRIGHTEST eyes. i cant contain my rabid love for him and it spills out into the art. i can’t help it. he gives the best hugs

SLADKFJ YES HE DOES..... IVE BEEN MEANING TO DRAW THIS FOR A HOT MINUTE,,,, as i mentioned earlier oscar is the world’s most apathetic cat so i dont think he would care that much but he’s not super happy about it

anonymous asked: Y'know what? I'm too tired so say smth clever so just know that I love you and your art is amazing 💕💕 PS: i love that you also tag them as Ineffable partners (i guess the point is to be gender neutral)

i love you as well anon,,, and yeah i like the ineffable partners tag! i find that it fits more with their relationship for some reason. though i still tag as ineffable husbands since its such a popular tag lksdfjdfknjbh

anonymous asked: Hello! Fist of all thank you for yor art, you are one of my favorite artists in this fandom and I have Feelings about the Ink and Flowers AU. Second: Don't feel pressured to post daily, we understand that life is complicated and art can be difficult sometimes. Take care! You're the best!

anon i would die for you!!! i never imagined that i would ever be one of anyone’s favorite artists,,,,, im speechless,,,,,,,,

and yeah unfortunately i dont think ill be able to post every other day once this coming semester starts :( i’ll probably have to cut back to once every 3. but there’s more ink and flowers coming at u guys so!! stay tuned for that

anonymous asked: Good omens characters having a game night?

i know this was sent in for the au prompts i asked for but. i dont think im physically capable of capturing the pure chaos that would ensue from this. holy shit it would be so feral.

thank you to anyone who read this whole thing!! i read all of my asks as soon as i get them and i have a lot that i’ve been sitting on for a while. if you sent me something i promise i haven’t forgotten about it!! if you’ve sent something in that you were expecting a response to and i havent responded, just send it again to be safe in case tumblr ate it

i love all of you! <3

#ask me anything #anonymous #not art #ink and flowers au #bolitakawaii-senpai #alligatorsnbats

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mamusings · 4 years

Text

Supernatural Season 2 thoughts

Continuing with my rewatch. This season kicks up several gears on season 1. Overall the storytelling is much better. There is a less formulaic approach to the even the MOTW episodes. Its inventive: you get one from the perspective of the ghost (Roadkill), two that layer in the boys run ins with the law. The first 4th wall breaker (Hollywood babylon), first alt reality (What is and what should never be) and I think the first straight up comic one (Tall Tales). This works much better. S1 episodes give you: a kill, work out the lore, find the creature and kill it right back. Instead of s1 espousing the lore and developing the brothers as a team, we now get to explore the show's moral compas and the complexity of what brotherhood means within it. I think Hollywood Babylon riffs off ditching the initial importance placed on accuracy in how Spn presented itself in it's own storyline. Yep we like story telling thank you, realism isnt really the point. The monsters and sub plots more clearly refract on the season themes and plot.

Supporting characters are another aspect of the shows blooming. They are a much more varied and interesting bunch. Gordon helps explore a key issue for the show - the distinction between being a hunter and a killer. Its significant he appears twice - it's a big issue. The psychics Andy and Ava are fun. Bank heist dude Ronald garners the right mix of derision and respect - I'm not sure spn homages to freaks and geeks hit the right note most of the time. And theres the Roadhouse crew and Bobby who really help flesh out what can become an overly confined universe.

The first third explores grief. You get the contrast in Sam and Dean's personalities in how they try to deal with John's death. But you also get the sense of them learning from each other as the season progresses. Dean tries talking. Sam tries keeping busy. Both grow while staying themselves. Nice. You also get a switch from s1 dominance of Dean's concern for Sam, with Sam's concern about Dean's increasingly high octane behaviour here and it's a nice switch. With grief you get guilt. Sam's is the easier too little too late regrets. Dean's is the motherload of guilt that John sacrificed himself for him. Given the shows dominant theology is Christian I find it hugely interesting that the focus here is on the receiver of the sacrifice. The overwhelming guilt Dean feels underpins the opening episodes, gets hammered home in Crossroads and then comes back for an even bigger bite when Dean does the same to Sam in the finale. Bobby's anger with Dean and Sam's devastation leaves me little doubt that as much as we all love that Sam is back, Dean did wrong here. Although maybe Dean's guilt comes from his low self worth. Sam might cope very differently?? But I do think the zombie episode declarations of 'what is dead should stay dead' make the point that thus wheeling and dealing with death cant be good. I personally find the idea that moral rules dont apply to Sam and Dean because of love is a weak one. I think fandom does spn a disservice by reducing something really complicated here into 'well they are soul mates'. Loving someone is not an excuse to chuck the rules out the window. But maybe the show itself descends into a moral free for all with no underpinning message and the blame lies there? I'm not sure. In a way that is what I'm trying to figure out with these commentaries.

What works better in explaining why Dean does to Sam what John did to him is the other big theme of season 2: the idea that right and wrong isnt black and white. This is the focus of lots of episodes some of which explore whether hunters are just killers. And others that explore at what stage something becomes evil and why. Both these questions are crucial in relation to Sam's destiny and how each of them should respond to that destiny. The first half of the season sees Dean trying out his fathers black/white approach and the hardening off of himself he thinks he needs to achieve in order to kill Sam should that becomes necessary. Its the mid season finale that finally answers that one for Dean. Sam goes proper bad, Dean doesn't kill him. Along the way, with Sam's prompting, Dean questions not only his father but also the morality he had assumed of his hunting so far. How Dean outgrows John is a huge theme for me. I find it fascinating because he remains the same kind of man as John. Tough, difficult etc he diesnt become Sam. What he changes ir accepts are that what he prizes isnt what John prizes, but rather the people he loves and he learns that this isnt a failing or a weakness. But it's a long long road.

Sam wrestles with the fact that he may turn evil trying to find ways to hope and ways to cope. He takes a leaf out of the Dean playbook at gets drunk. He prays. He looks for a safety net getting Dean's to promise to off him. Dean promises to save him, but the message in Heart is that sometimes the only way to save someone is to kill them. However, the other message is solving things one step at a time, making the right play for the circumstances and not drawing one arbitrary line somewhere - be it between people and non-people or even that evil acts make you irredeemably evil. Slippery stuff, but that's what makes it interesting.

One thing I really like in this season is how the brothers begin to influence each other. They are still a study in contrasts, but they try out each others approaches and they've learned to value what the other brings to the table. As Sam says in the opener they have just started to be brothers again. Their relationship is so supportive that the comic Tall Tales reminding us how much they wind each other up is a needed counterpart lest things get just too damn sweet. The disturbing siblings at the centre of 2 episodes is also sends the message that it ain't all roses too. Andy has an actual evil twin. The ending of Playthings with the sisters is filled with creepy foreboding is particular to this episode. One sister gives her life up for the other and it feels wrong. Of course its foreshadowing other famous brothers but let's leave that alone just now.

In terms of Sam and Dean, their brotherhood seems to have kicked the S1 Sam and Dean team up into formidable. Their run-ins with law enforcement moves our perception of them beyond boys hunting into being increasingly impressed as they outwit cops and feds. It also moves their interactions with outsiders beyond gratitude from victims towards validation from peers and this feels important. There's the seamless teamwork with code words and all. But more importantly trust and loyalty - Sam is unswayed under police questioning in The Usual Suspects. Folsom Prison Blues most explicitly highlights Dean's almost fanatical sense of loyalty and paying your dues.

This pays off in the final two parter. As strong as All Hell Breaks Lose 2 is, part 1 is a yawn fest. But what is interesting is that while Sam does his best to found a team, Azazel can just pluck them off one by one by appeals to each person's individual self interest. The only one of the psychics who gets that the only way to win is to stick together is Sam. In my view Sam learned this from Dean. Dean is always playing the stronger together card. At this point in the show, brotherhood is about solidarity, trust and loyalty. That's actually the message here far more than love. Of course they love each other. But that alone wouldn't have got them this far. What gets them here is sticking together. When Dean finally surpasses John in killing Azazel he gets his moment of John unqualified approval and love. But right after comes the key dialogue of the season. Sam says 'you did it' and Dean replies 'I didnt do it alone'. That seems to me to highlight what's been going on so far. Learning not to do it alone. Learning to lean on and accept others. That's where the Winchester boys outgrow their upbringing and themselves.

Addendum: the angel episode House of the Holy deserves a mention. Its so finely balanced between being about angels and not when viewed on it's own. Its only on rewatching that the effects and props leave you in no doubt that even if F. Gregory isn't an angel this episode is about angels. Its curious as to why it's in season 2 rather than maybe in s3 - no angel appears until season 4. I refuse to count Gabriel in s3 as an angel appearance as he's for many seasons yet still just the trickster. So why? Maybe it's to help us understand the significance for Sam? Angels give Sam hope - making it even more awful for him that he is the object of their suspicion. Or is it about the need for faith, which tellingly Dean hadn't got.

#supernatural #spn #sam #dean #winchester

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snkpolls · 5 years

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SnK S3E13 Poll Results (Manga Reader Version)

The poll closed with 539 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results of the manga reader poll. Anime only watchers are suggested not to read if you do not wish to be spoiled about certain events! Anime only viewers, click here to view your poll results!

RATE THE EPISODE 534 Responses

WIT kicked off the arc fantastically according to the viewers! This episode got overall positive reviews, with 95% of respondents giving it a 4 or 5 rating.

An ideal opening episode in my opinion!

Incredible start for possible the best season yet ♥

Awesome opening episode to set the stage for the arc to come. Pacing was just right, imo.

HYPE MY SOLDIERS

I think it was a great ep and did pretty well with the chapters it adapted. The dialogue was there and so were the scenes, the ending hyped what is coming so much so I'm already in love!

Lack of creavity when it come to the OP and ED visuals, but the ep overall was good.

The soundtrack slaps, voice acting is on point, and the animation proves to be very promising. Overall, it's a great episode to start off the second cour!

Awesome episode with awesome soundtrack.

One of the best episodes of the whole series, which was surprising.

RATE THE OP 533 Responses

Overall respondents liked the new Linked Horizon opening, which was a great summary of the current arc, but overall it fell flat as a song that most would be willing to label as their favorite.

OP depicts the upcoming battle well!

Great adaptation, just wish the opening was a little more original

It is the worst OP of all. The song is disappointing; it sounds like typical, boring song from random shonen series.

The opening definitely had some parts to it that felt recycled from previous openings, but I guess it's just Linked Horizon's way of linking them all together.

SPACE OPERATION RAINBOW!!!

To me it looks like they ran out of time to make an OP so they slapped a green filter on what they had done already.

RATE THE ED 530 Responses

The 104th-centered still-frame ED has some mixed reviews with most of the fandom sitting somewhere in the middle between loving and hating it. Respondents overall are leaning more toward the positive, however.

ED is perfect with the time skip just over the horizon

WE GOT A FEW NEW SAWANO TRACKS. HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT THEM? 530 Responses

Well over half the fandom are already pumped for new music from the series’ composer Sawano Hiroyuki! A whopping 76% already feel that he’s killing it. 22% need more time to decide how they feel. A small sliver of respondents don’t really care for the OST. Who hurt you?

ost perfect as usual

It was good but at this point everything sounds like it's been reused a bunch of times. Hopefully we get some new great tracks later on..

Hyeh

The bassline in the new rendition of "Attack on Titan" (or however Sawano spells it) is amazing. I cannot wait for the S3 soundtrack to be released.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT? 532 Responses

The scene with the Beast Titan appearing with his army of titans took 30% of the vote, with Levi attacking Reiner as a close second with 22% of the vote. 10% overall liked the entire episode, and 7% favorited the cliffhanger staredown. We can all agree the battle to come has us all hyped!

I repeated the scene where Reiner appears until the end of the episode tons of times already

Did they really had to skip Levi's frustrated expression after he failed to kill Reiner? It was my favorite moment…

Levi attacking Reiner and everything after that has become one of my favorite scenes in the series. Damn!

Nice Erwin Screentime, nice Levi nyooming behind Eren

Best girl makes her appearance

the last three minutes of the episode where the warriors show up was fucking amazing

ON SCALE OF ARMIN TO ERWIN, HOW GOOD ARE YOU AT GIVING ORDERS? 526 Responses

The majority of respondents relate to Armin’s timid nature a bit more when it comes to overall confidence in giving orders. Just a small 6.3% of you guys feel you have the charismatic swag that Erwin brings to the table.

I loved Armin giving orders politely.

How was Armin overcoming social anxiety a billion times cooler then eren flying over a 60m wall, becoming a titan and basically saving humanity.

ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW MUCH DO YOU WANT TO GO HORSEBACK SURFING? 528 Responses

This was in no way a serious question. But at an almost even split, 35.8% of voters would totally try their hand at horseback surfing, while 35.2% would never risk their life doing such a dangerous activity!

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE ANIMATION QUALITY IN PART TWO SO FAR? 529 Responses

Overall respondents are pleased with the animation in the first episode of the RtS arc, with 54% stating that it’s the best animation they’ve seen from the series yet. 42% feel it could be better, but is also not the worst. A small percentage don’t find the animation all that impressive.

I can’t believe how clean all of the animation is looking. SUPER impressed with the difference in art-style compared to season 1 as well.

The animation is on the highest level.

i miss the thick lines the show used to have

i really love the colour palette of this season and the op especially.

IMO the color tones on this episode could've been handled better, it was too gloomy on some scenes :(

The animation & art style was almost as good as season 2’s (which is one of my favorite pieces of animation of all time) but still lacked in some areas.

Looks like they went all out with budget on this season and I'm loving it

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE CG COLOSSAL TITAN IN THE OPENING? 532 Responses

57% of respondents aren’t too upset about the GCI Colossal Titan in the opening and say they don’t mind either way. 35% aren’t happy at all with the decision to make the Colossal CGI, while a few actually find the effect super cool.

ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW EXCITED ARE YOU TO FINALLY SEE THIS ARC ANIMATED? 533 Responses

The overwhelming majority are extremely excited to see this arc animated after all these years. With its high levels of action and drama, it’s no surprise to us to see that the fandom is looking forward to getting this arc in an animated form!

IVE WAITED MORE THAN 2 YEARS FOR THIS IM NEVER BEEN SO FUCKING HYPED IN MY WHOLE LIFE

I've waited so many years that I'm satisfied and ready to pass now that my favorite arc is being animated

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE ADAPTATION OF RTS SO FAR? 532 Responses

67% of respondents are feeling very satisfied with the way the arc is unraveling in the anime, finding that it’s a very close adaptation of the original source material. 23% feel that it’s still too early to judge the adaptation properly, and a few less feel that the adaptation so far is somewhere between good and bad.

Fantastic adaptation.

Good pacing jumping right into the action, while staying faithful to the manga.

Overall very good, but could be a TAD better

I think the adaptation so far has been great, but I need to see how the action is handled before I say for sure whether it's well adapted or not.

It was ok.

It was very well-adapted! All the important details were there and nothing important seemed to be missing, which was something I was sad about in the last arc. It seems like everything I want will get covered.

How do we come back from there without breaking my heart?

PART 2 IS SLATED FOR 10 EPISODES. DO YOU THINK THIS WILL BE ENOUGH TO ADAPT THE ARC WELL? 531 Responses

Voters are confident that WIT knows what they’re doing by shortening the amount of episodes that will air for this action-heavy arc, with only ¼ of respondents feeling that they haven’t given themselves enough screen time to cover every last detail. 10% don’t want to say either way.

i was disappointed in knowing it was a 10 episode arc, but seeing the quality and taking into account that this is an action-heavy arc, i'm bouncing off of the walls to see what wit has underneath their sleeve. hopefully they don't ruin the best arc

one advantage of the short season is that they cant draw out the serum bowl for too long. God, that was a painful wait when the manga was dropping those chapters.

Really well done, the pacing in particular was great. After seeing it I was convinced 10 episodes was perfect for this arc. A 6-4 split is perfect.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE VERY SPOILERY OPENING? 532 Responses

61% of respondents agree that the opening, while spoilery, is a great summary and teaser of what is to come for those who only watch the anime. Without context, they can’t know what every last symbolic image in the opening means, after all! 23% of voters expressed distaste at how much WIT is spoiling the viewers, however. 9% aren’t even concerned about it.

The whole opening was just one big “fuck you” to people who don’t read the manga.

it only becomes obvious b/c manga readers keep pointing stuff out. Yes, the intros have always hinted at things but it goes so fast that I don’t think every person will know exactly what something means if they’re anime only.

The Opening is good representation of this phase of the story ending.

I don't get why people are making a big deal over the "spoilers" in the opening when they're not even anime-onlies themselves in the first place.

Man, it only seems spoilery for those of us who know what's coming. Anime onlies don't understand the context of the images, so they can't recognise them as spoilers unless it's directly identified as such! We gotta stop judging this stuff from the perspective of someone who already knows what's coming.

It's definitely not holding back on the indications that'll happen in the arc

HOW DID THE NEW ED MAKE YOU FEEL? 527 Responses

61% of manga readers felt nostalgic seeing the images of the 104th during their trainee days coupled with a somber song. 20% felt sad about the ending, and 15% were just disappointed with the entire thing.

Lazy ending.

WHAT DID YOU THINK ABOUT THE RED EYES ON THE TITANS? 533 Responses

Just over half of the fandom feel that the red-eyed pure titans was a cool aesthetic to add to show that they are under some form of control by a shifter. 33% feel it’s a cool addition, but not really necessary. 11% don’t care.

I was on board with the red eyes until the cart titan also had them. No longer made any sense.

I don't get why Pieck's eyes are red when she's not a mindless being controlled by Zeke…

Like the red eyes but why does Pieck have them too.

WHICH SCENE FROM THE PREVIEW ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? 530 Responses

Perhaps unsurprisingly, over half of the fandom is most hyped to see the Eren vs. Reiner showdown in Shiganshina. Although not far behind, 28% of respondents are excited about Erwin’s badass unhooding moment as he challenges Reiner.

THUNDER SPEARS FOR NEXT CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!!

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Even though I totally know what will happen, the episode is written and directed in a way I still get goosebumps and forget I actually know what will happen. And the music, oh god. That's amazing. These two together have a really good effect.

I need the next one RIGHT NOW.

AAAAAHH!!!!

It was an introduction episode, so imo, it's just there to put the basis for the rest of the season. There was a good balance between the "emotionally charged" scenes and the more quiet ones, all this accompanied with an increasing tension in the background.

I wish theyd reanimated the scene of armin talking to eren about the opening instead of just reusing the animation from season 1.

that Zeke smile is like : hey there, i am here to euthanize you all. Love it !

I'm buying tickets into denial islaaand, bye, bye!

Airpipes. AIRPIPES. p.s. cracking soundtrack

Reiner has been enjoying himself some Marley protein, he extra swole now.

Armin was the MVP

PIECK!!!

I don't like the fact that WiT decided to spoil a lot. Some anime onlies already have guessed that Armin is going to be burned and then will become the next CT. So the serumbowl won't be as emotional and exciting for them anymore. I don't understand why WiT decided to do such thing. Don't they want anime-onlies to enjoy the show?

Exactly as expected you'll find a strange titan next to the beasty

I love Mikasa’s improved design and hope they show more of her working in a team like the manga. Focusing on the mission ect without pandering

RIP nameless soldier killed by Reiner.

Very happy to get a glimpse at best girl Pieck

Really no questions about our exactly right girl in this poll ? I am dissapointed :/

Watching this episode is bringing back all the suspense and awe I felt when I read this part in the manga. What a treat to be able to relive it!

They did a great job at keeping the tension and the "well shit everything's about to go wrong" from chapters 73 and 74, and managed to make the explosion at the end worth it, despite the fact I still think Reiner's continued survival throughout the arc is stupid and wish the anime had changed it so it'd be more believable, but here we are.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 514 Responses

Thank you to everyone who participated! We’ll see you again in a few days!

#snk poll #snk polls #snk spoilers #snk s3 #poll results

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meetnombre · 6 years

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I promised myself that would keep this blog sfw. That I would fill it full of things that would make many other people happy and to help them escape from the outside world. It was supposed to be my little corner of the web that would be free from real world politics. I guess, today is finally that time where I have to break that promise.

The whole thing started just as Hasbro released the last episode of the first season of My Little Pony. I discovered it all at once when I marathoned through the first season. For 6 months afterwards, I have been following the pony fandom with a passion, but from a distance. Checking out other peoples art, lurking in forums, sending anon messages to other people’s tumblrs. That kind of stuff. (what can I say? To this day, I am still a bit of a social outcast)

It wasnt until one fateful day when I came across a certain someone’s tumblr blog through another person’s livestream. Not gonna mention any names (SilverBlaze! XD), but anyways! It was through this person’s tumblr that I was encouraged very strongly to introduce myself to someone from the fandom for the very first time. What pretty much happened was that I whacked this awesome guy an anonymous donation through his paypal associated with his new tumblr. What immediately happened afterwards was that his OC absolutely freaked out. Maybe I shouldnt have anonymously sent the post: “Here! Have a bag of free money!” as an anon...oh well XP This person helped me to muster the courage to create an online identity that I could use to interact with the fandom a lot better. He drew me my very own pony! (I still remember the livestream, where Silver started drawing “nombre” without a reference…remember the “meet nombre” image that used to be at the top of my tumblr? That was a modified screenshot of what Silver actually drew for me XD. He then scribbled it out, and began drawing my very own nombre! He asked me if I wanted nombre to be a boy or a girl, as he already started to draw long eyelashes for nombre. I was like “Nombre is a boy! NOMBRE IS A BOY!”, and he quickly removed the eyelashes after that X) ). I eventually took my brand new oc, created my very own tumblr…but then decided to wait until a better time to reveal my tumblr, as I kind of accidentally got Heart Lift, Sparks, and Toast Lift to swap bodies on purpose XP

But yeah! Finally went public with my tumblr, and eventually met someone else (Kappa! XP). I visited quite a few of her livestreams (when silver wasnt streaming, obviously XP), and we just…talked. We caught up with each other so much…we really gotta catch up with each other some more. But what happenned eventually was that Kappa invited me to a group chat where Silver and so many other awesome people got to hang out with each other. I met so many idols of my time and so many new faces, all of which soon became mutual friends. I literally felt like one of the richest people on the planet. I even met someone (Andie!), who soon became my girlfriend!

I still remember bits and pieces of the first group voice chat that I had with this group. One of the guys first impressions was “Is this guy serious?” (Kaipo XP), and “I’m more concerned that this guy works with live explosives for a living” (Rainboom XD)

It didnt last forever. Nothing lasts forever. One of my close friends from that group was forced to leave because he kept on getting anonymous hate from someone else. He didnt know who it was, so he was about at that stage where he was going to shut himself off from ‘everyone’. Good job anon! Good job! *slow clap*

I remember very well the time when that group that helped me with my depression got themselves a new certain member. Things were all good for a while…until that certain member made a techno remix, and asked the group as to what they thought of it. The problem was the title that he chose for it, as it was completely unrelated to the music itself, completely unnecessary, and pretty offensive to a lot of people (I’m pretty sure it was something like “Retarded Austistics” or “Autistic Retards” or something simular…..yeah…). That person was eventually removed from the group, but there was a bit of mayhem in the process, as ‘every single member of the group had moderator powers’. The incident served as a wakeup call to the group, so what happenned was that everyone was disbanded from the old group, and a new group was established…

…but here’s the thing. Not everyone was allowed into the new group. There was one person, who apparently the slim majority at the time decided that they didnt want in the new group. A lot of dramas happened since this event, but this particular separation in my opinion was a pretty big deal, as she was kind of a big part of the group at the time, and a big part of my life.

So! The one big group of people who meant so much to me ended up splitting into 2 separate groups. I stayed silent about the whole thing since then, hoping that someday maybe everyone will let bygones be bygones, because we were all friends once. Instead the opposite happened. Years later, a lot of people started forgetting each other. I could have been more proactive at the time to try and preserve what we all had, but I was worried about hurting someone in the process. I didnt know what to do.

My girlfriend broke up with me, and it was pretty much my fault. After being together for 3 months, she approached me and said that she needed some time apart...and I absolutely flipped my shit. I ended up saying a ‘lot’ of stupid shit that sent her into an absolute chronic panic attack. This drove her to the point where she told me straight up that I was no different from any of the other horrible people in her life. I felt like a real asshole when she said that. I said a lot of things that I shouldnt have said that day.

I was very fortunate to still have her as a friend after all of that. ‘Very’ fortunate.

It was about 3 months after this however that she decided to close her tumblr and delete her skype. She told me that she found happiness outside of this world that she built up. Over 2 years passed since she sent me that post, 2 years that she went missing. That’s long enough to legally declare anyone dead (not kidding either. After all of the low’s that she had been through, my mind was really starting to wonder into some pretty dark places as to what might have happened to her. I was so scared). But everything was okay! I actually got a message from her after all of those years from her telling me that she was doing very well and has settled down with someone else.

All I wanted was the best for her and for her to be happy. Nothing has changed. Even if is with someone else, I dont care. She ‘is’ happy, and she ‘is’ doing what is best for her, and thats all that matters. Hell, I’d approach this guy and shake his hand if it wasn’t for the fact that it would probably make things awkward for everyone XD

But as for me, I’m stuck. I dont really know what to do with myself anymore. When you give someone your heart and things dont work out, most people would get over it. Most people would have found a rebound relationship right now or something, but I guess I’m just not like most people. It’s not just because of my past, but its also because of my toxic present and future. I work in a workplace that can be pretty toxic at times. It’s like, you go back to work after your rostered days off to be meeted by ‘many’ old fashioned people who ask you inappropriate questions like “Hey Nombre! Did you get a root on break?” or “Hey Nombre! You should go get a hooker! You might like it!” over and over because they think its funny to do so, it just puts me off so much. I’m fine as I am! I dont mind being single, even if its for the rest of my life...but there are a lot of people out there who think its okay to treat other people like shit because they are ‘different’, when in reality, my workplace is full of old dirty perverts.

Meanwhile, I’m hardly ever online anymore. Every time I do manage to return to eavesdrop on everyone, it feels like everyone is just becoming more and more isolated from each other. I saw a post on ‘that’ group from someone who said that they wondered what I was up to, to which someone else replied that I pretty much only use tumblr now...and that really hurt me a lot. I cant blame them for thinking that way though, given that I hardly appear anymore. I deserved that.

Every time I look into my tumblrs past posts, I always have dramas. This was supposed to be a place of fun, but because the peak of my tumblr career involved the misadventures between myself and my ex and a certain red horse, looking back always brings up a lot of repressed memories.

I dont want to quit tumblr. But at the same time, I dont want to keep going. I dont know what to do. I really wish that things could have been like they were back in the first quarter of 2013. I liked that.

Over 5 years since then, and I dont know how to move on. I really dont.

#vent #Wall of text #I'm sorry

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lega18 · 7 years

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I'm just gonna ramble my thoughts here bc idk where else to rn (twitter becomes a thread and i feel like thats annoying) who knows i might even delete this but. for now I'm feeling?? a lot/? rn like doubt in myself idk. Ironic bc this past month has been the most creative/most ive drawn in awhile thanks to good ol todorok. mp100 gave me a lot of inspiration too but its even better when i obsess over one character and draw them so much i get to know them..anyways thats not the point. i guess its life in general and where I'm going and if art is a part of it, which i always thought it would be. but lately i feel otherwise, like my time passed or smth. its stupid bc I'm a big believer in its never too late but also?? is drawing a hobby?? is it what i love most?(id say yes but then i keep going back to the constant questioning it brings me but i guess thats normal ) BASICALLY Im feeling a lot of insecurity (and deep down i know itll pass like usual) (because as soon as i get that good feeling when i start drawing smth i love, ill wonder why the fuc i ever questioned if drawing was Important to me) but. i really gotta stop thinking so deep into it. somehow. And theres many other things I've been thinking abt, like peoples perception of me online and the negativity and that i want to start avoiding it but its hard when your on social media, so theres the fine balance between that. But then i meet/have met so many amazing people to weigh it out, so. i cant leave just yet. i also make a lot of empty promises in regards to art and I'm glad some ppl have stuck around.

and then theres the comparing myself with others and my desperate need TO STOP THAT. funny how u always want more, right lol. its never enough, guys, u gotta draw for yourself bc at the end of the day thats all u got. I'm thankful to all the people I've met and ‘inspired’ (SOMEHOW???SOMEWAY??) i appreciate every single comment i get on my art and every ask even if i don't always reply etc..

(THIS REALLY IS ALL SO FUNNY TO ME BC just this past month or 2 i REALLY REALLY was feeling like ‘this is it, this is my style, I'm really sinking into it and not wanting to be my art idols’ but maybe this is just the verge of another break thru in ‘style’ lol )

ANYWAYS I'm not gonna go back and reread this so lets hope theres nothing too embarrassing.. I really have to just start doing what I want. IM HERE FOR ME, RIGHT?????

i really REALLY want to get to know ppl in the bnha fandom and i want to stay here for a minute so. hopefully my todorok dumps (as well as a few other things) over the next week bring in some new ppl. Not that I'm leaving mob for good. (S2 WHEN??) BUT YEAH idk guys. ok I'm feeling a lot better now getting that all out. IM OFF TO DRAW MORE!! gonna try livestreaming again at some point?? i finally was able to get it working ;;0;; (BUT IM OVERWHELMED THINKING MORE THAN ONE PERSON WILL SHOW, THE PRESSURE???) lol ok this is literally too long, I LOVE TODOROKI AND BAKUGOU AND TODOBAKU AND I'm ending this. but ill be back

#TEXT #LONG ASS TEXT #FEELINGS DIARY??? lol #tell me yours too lets get this out why not

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abundantchewtoys · 5 years

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HS EpiPro: page 3 reaction

After giving it more thought, I know Rose might simply have been moved by the goodbye.

There's a possibility it's a farewell, that John might not be able to rejoin them, but then that would mean HIS victory state is something else.

And if I'm honest, the main thing that would move him to choose the other versions of his friends above those that he won the game with, was if their adventures somehow led to his Dad's resurrection. At least, that's the only thing I can come up with right now.

I also no longer think that Rose might have gotten 'ideas' due to her current state, but it still stands that her condition, if it wouldn't improve, is a serious impediment. Comparable to any debillitating illness you can get at a young age, like Parkinson or young dementia.

On to greener pastures, for now. I'm looking forward to the John/Roxy interaction. Apart from the funny quips they'll exchange, I'm looking to see what nuggets of wisdom she may have to share with him. If she won't join after all, she may have something for John as a Rogue of Void, shedding light on something he was too oblivous to have noticed or remembered.

---

Hmm, so Rose was in the Human Kingdom? Kind of strange, considering Kanaya's commitment to the trolls' legacy. It... might just be that the Human & Troll Kingdom are located at the same coordinates on the planet, just the first one on the surface level and the other, partially submerged? We know from the snaps that Karkat's hive, at least, was on the surface.

"For whatever faults this paradise you created might have, you sure don’t hear many complaints about the weather." Those faults including the troll rebellion that kidnapped Jane?

"You’re sitting with Roxy and Calliope on a giant, chessboard-pattern tablecloth. It’s a nice touch, you think. But if you spent any time shopping in the Carapace Kingdom, you’d know most things you can buy are chess themed." Pffff, hah, of course that's a thing. At least a chess-themed cloth is not so on the nose as, say, chess-themed cars or clothes.

"JOHN: she looked alright. mostly just tired.

JOHN: at least she seemed to have enough energy to babble at length about philosophical gibberish, and things about canon and such.

ROXY: lmao

ROXY: guess she filled you in on all the ultimate self junk then"

So Roxy knew about Rose's condition, but at minimum hadn't spoken to her that day yet. Also, she knows about the merging of selves! The 'ultimate self' term could've come from Jade, from when she talked to Davepetasprite^2.

"JOHN: you haven’t been feeling anything like that, right?

ROXY: what getting to know my ultimate self?

JOHN: yeah.

ROXY: man ive barely got a hold of my basic ass self" Hah, nice. At least John isn't the only one.

"the only illicit substance i’ve ever done is lick that STUPID trickster lollipop" Well, okay, so John didn't loot Dad's liquor stash, if the man had any to begin with.

"JOHN: NEVER AGAIN." Calliope might think the incident bears repeating, unless she learned by now that irresponsibly discarding your issues doesn't resolve anything.

"ROXY: cant say its much my business anymore

ROXY: rose and i arent as close as we used to be

You nod, sort of knowingly, because you’re thinking about how you hadn’t talked to Rose in ages either. Roxy gives you a quizzical look, but you turn away before she can draw meaning from it." :/ They've drifted apart over the years, then. I kind of hoped they'd keep in touch, all sister-like. And Roxy might be a whiz at reading subverbal clues, come to think of it, as Rogue of Void.

"ROXY: maryams been keeping her real busy since they got hitched

ROXY: they both vanished down the brooding caverns and that was p much that

ROXY: only since she got sick and spent more time at home did we start talkin more again

ROXY: its been great but our conversations have been a lil bit upsetting" Eesh, so... Kanaya's calling kept the two of them so wrapped up they lost contact. That's sad. I wonder if Rose came up because exposure to the sun helped alleviate some of the symptoms, due to Vitamine D and all that. In any case, if they hadn't talked that much in so long, there's still a lot of unresolved issues between the two of them.

"You look towards the bell tower in the distance. It’s a gothic building so tall that it cuts a shadow through the midday sun. It’s an important landmark in the kingdom—the tallest structure for miles around—and the only way you can ever navigate your way here flying. Carapace architecture is otherwise identic, a reflection of their functional, collectivist society." I'm pretty sure the bell tower resembles the towers with the prototyping orbs on Derse & Prospit. I can picture anyone not a carapace getting lost pretty quickly in this kingdom.

"ROXY: ive thought about it but ill probably never wanna live in a different kingdom

ROXY: still feel most at home around the chess guys" Aww, yeah, it's the society she grew up knowing, identical architecture included.

"JOHN: that’s about how i feel about the salamanders. JOHN: which... i realize actually makes no fucking sense." I think the Salamander Village somehow reminds John of his old town. Maybe by subconsiously equating the pipes of LOWAS to the Pipe Lake that was near his home. (Look it up if you don't know, the location of John's town really exists.)

"JOHN: they lead simple lives.

JOHN: i don’t really care for the chaos of human or troll cities." I think John longs for the suburban feel, and maybe there are a lot less suburbs on Earth C that can hold up in comparison to his old neighbourhood. Plus, the salamanders make a best effort to act like proper businessmen bringing food on the shelves and taking care of their atomic family household. It's just recognizable, to John.

"You watch Roxy smile and reach for Calliope’s hand.

> Look away before you start dwelling on it.

You start dwelling on it immediately, looking probably quite conspicuous with how quickly you whipped your gaze away. But seriously, what is up with their relationship? Is it romantic? Platonic? Can cherubs even have a romantic relationship? Are they even interested in it, like, on a fundamental level? Do their brains and hearts even work that way? Questions like this used to keep you awake at night." Ah, John, I know your the fandom avatar here, but for you to be this preoccupied with romance is weird. :P I'd figure he'd figure they were just close friends, like a good shonen anime protagonist would. I'm reminded of the events from the snaps, where Roxy & Calliope appeared to be dating, but eh. I suppose due to the snaps existing outside of canon, they're all squared off into a "choose what you want to keep from this" zone.

You look at them, at where Roxy’s fingers are entwined with Calliope’s green claws. Calliope is still wearing the Ring of Life. The same one you obtained in a ludicrous adventure through the afterlife, and then re-obtained in a ludicrous adventure through canon when it was stolen from you. It’s the same one that allowed Calliope to stop being dead in the first place, and to come live with your friends here on your beautifully renovated home planet." I've begun thinking: if John would retcon the Game Over timeline, Aranea would still be in possession of the Ring of Life. But she may not keep it, it just depends on whether removing the ring rekills her or not. If not, then that's a Chekov's Gun they'll probably need at some point.

"And it’s the same one you gave Roxy all those years ago, to fulfill a promise made to a very special new friend.

At the time, the gesture felt so important. It felt more meaningful than any gift you’d ever given. Like there was some grand emotional gravitas about it that signified something deeper than... than what it turned out to be.

You have since concluded you were just imagining things. Ascribing symbolic meaning to gestures that they simply didn’t carry, like the dumb kid you were." Yeah, Roxy x John was being hinted at pretty badly back then. I figure part of the reason John hasn't stayed in touch with her is because the feelings were, in the end, not to last or be reciprocated in full. Then again, it might have been a case of one thing leading to another - John distancing himself because he didn't know what to make of Roxy & Calliope's relationship, in turn alienating Roxy little by little.

"But you can’t stop thinking about it. What goes on in Roxy’s head. What she thinks about you.

You and all your friends have dispositions affected by your classes and aspects. You think you know what that means in your case. But what about her? You can only speculate. Void is a place where things sink and disappear. Where they linger forever, but cease to exist. You aren’t actually sure if your feelings for Roxy ever really faded, or if they just grew numb with time and distance. Is it the same for her?

You search your soul for the answer, but come up empty. The truth is, you suspect her mental interior is unfathomable. In fact, you feel sure of it.

You wonder suddenly, watching her. This version of her, that is. The one with whom you share all these bittersweet memories—will you ever see her again?" I do wonder what John's class & aspect does to his disposition, that he thinks. As for Roxy's feelings being swallowed by the Void or the workings of her mind & heart being incalculable... That is just taking an easy way out of thinking about a hard problem, in my opinion. I do however like the fact that John at least realizes that by goiAgang back into canon, he risks losing his way back here. It's good the realization didn't just came after the fact.

Again, what's HIS victory state: Dad revived, and Roxy committed to a relationship with him, if she really isn't otherwise engaged? ... I wonder if he'll seek some last minute guidance from Nannasprite (either one), before leaving, come to think of it.

"CALLIOPE: ahem." Aha! I was kind of beginning to doubt she'd even speak up. It's easy to think of Calliope as a background character in this story, but she's been an important catalyst for a lot of events. And, she or a version of her will probably still have a large role to play. Though Blaperile and I wonder how there could be another version of her, since Roxy only revived her after the events of Game Over.

"CALLIOPE: please forgive me if i come across as impatient. bUt if we are finished with the pleasantries, i believe yoU have a choice to make." I don't think the choice is: cake or cookies. Then again, it just might be, since Blaperile reminded me the choice was referred to in the epilogues summary. It'll probably get lampshaded a couple times again before it really happens, and they do seem to be picknicking right now.

CALLIOPE: the choice as to whether yoU will go defeat my brother, or stay here." Ooh, I'm glad it's a serious choice. I wonder about Calliope's stance in this matter. She hates Caliborn, also fears his powers, presumably. But she's wise enough to understand his importance to the whole of Paradox Space.

"CALLIOPE: have yoU decided yet?

JOHN: there’s a choice??" Real, capitalize-C Choices, in Sburb at least, always seem to beget two timelines, but inside an epilogue, the consequences of that would be... confusing.

"ROXY: tbh its a relief to finally be doin this

JOHN: it is?

ROXY: mm hm

JOHN: how much have you actually... talked about this? i mean, how many people knew this was going to be a thing?" ... Did EVERYONE of the players talk about this beforehand, has everyone made there peace with John possibly leaving them forgood to save their own futures? On the one hand, that would sooth John of most worry, but on the other hand... That must sting a little or a lot.

"ROXY: just us and rose. well dirk too i think" Oh, so only them and Dirk? Is it because of his powers as the Prince of Heart, that he has his own understanding of the ultimate self, by way of keeping in contact with all shards of his person in some way or another? ... Is the epilogue version of Dirk, or Brain Ghost Dirk, going to be able to use some of post-canon Dirk's knowledge in the matter, I wonder?

"ROXY: shes been talkin to me about it a bunch

ROXY: and him too but i dunno how much

ROXY: hes got like

ROXY: “thoughts” about all this shit

ROXY: but whatever thats not important or even remotely surprising

ROXY: bottom line, rose has been tormenting herself about having to tell you

ROXY: im just glad she finally said it so she can rest" Ah, so that is the main reason Rose & Roxy's latest conversations weren't more pleasant, then. Also, Dirk and Rose have always been the strategists of their respective cliques, among the humans that is.

"CALLIOPE: yes. take all the time yoU need.

CALLIOPE: again, we aren’t here to inflUence yoU. it’s very important that the decision come from yoUr desire to go throUgh with it, one way or another.

CALLIOPE: any tampering coUld taint the resUlts.

JOHN: taint the...

JOHN: wait, what?" Oh yes, John has to decide for himself, no one can just, like COMMAND him to do it through the narration or anything. :P Funny how, meta wise, indeed we can't influence John, but in-story, he's of course still getting railroaded into making a choice. There's supposed to be three options in this: fight, flight or indecision, but he's denied the last one.

This is actually one of the first times John is going to make the call for himself after being informed of the stakes. I mean that in, he's not supposed to decide on the best course of action together with someone else.

"A chill runs through you and stays there.

> Consider the gravitas of this choice.

You try, but you can’t, because you weren’t really prepared for it. You didn’t think it was a choice at all until this very second." Even if they won't influence him in word, being informed of the stakes may convince John that there is not really anything to say in favour for NOT doing this.

"You think back to the way Rose looked at you before she went to bed. What has she told Roxy that she didn’t tell you? The chill tightens around your throat and turns into fear.

No, not fear. The feeling is worse than that. It’s regret.

You wasted your time here on this idyllic restoration of Earth. Why did you spend so much time alone? Moping around the house mourning your dead father, who probably would have wanted you to get more enjoyment out of your teen years, as well as your unusually early retirement. There’s so much you could have done. You could have even reached out to Roxy again; maybe she was waiting for you to do that. Maybe your withdrawal hurt her. Maybe she was heartbroken, just like you kind of feel right now. You study her perfectly stoic face and conclude nothing from it. Her expression reminds you of how Dave used to look, when you first met for real, before years of living with Karkat softened him up. Impenetrable cool." John might get a lot of second chance out of this adventure, but it won't make up for what he and everyone else has gone through already... I'm glad John is coming back from that whole "unfathomable mental interior" idea he had. It shouldn't be that hard for him, to picture what he'd feel if he was her and had gotten the same treatment as he gave her.

"It’s too late to figure any of this out now. You fucked it up already.

Unless, of course, you choose to stay.

Upon further examination, you realize that Roxy’s stoicism isn’t cold. There’s concern there. She is displaying restraint, keeping quiet while you make up your mind. You’re sweating, you realize. Cold sweat. Even worse than the anime nightmare sweat you woke up soaked in this morning.

ROXY: john u ok?" The gravitas of the situation is fully stalking him now. At least, if he chooses to stay, I'm convinced another version of him would turn up to fill the... ahem, void. Like the version of him he met when he went back to talk to Terezi and got the scarf instructions.

Blaperile has a good point, that John for once has to form an opinion on the best course of action and stick to it, not letting himself be influenced. That kind of resolve is rare for him, after all, he's done so much relying on other people to know better.

"JOHN: ..." This is really not any responsibility John enjoys having.

"CALLIOPE: this decision is far too important to be made on an empty stomach." Oh, NOW the cake & cookies come out. :P I think John'll have to think this one over some more still, asking other people for input.

"CALLIOPE: behold, an array of savory delights for the carnally inclined.

CALLIOPE: or perhaps something for yoUr sweet tooth, if a lUst for treats is what stokes yoUr desire?" Hah, her diet's still the same then as before, meat & candy.

"You scoot to the side and peek into the basket to see if there’s anything else. There’s a book in there, but no more food. This is all there is." Might that be Rose's tome in there? It would be funny for John to only make his decision after having reread the entirety of Homestuck, as a refreshener of everything that happened to him. :P

"Your entire world narrows to a single point of light as you are utterly consumed by the overbearing decision about which of these absurd meals to have for lunch." Ah yes, not the Choice the victory state deserves John to make, but the one John needs right now.

"> MEAT or CANDY?

Meat or candy. The two possibilities pinball around your skull. Meat or candy. It’s a tough choice. On any other day you might be inclined to simply follow the whims of your cravings, but no clear victor surges to the forefront of your mind."

Hmm, there seems to be a parallel being drawn here to John's actual Choice. Is the timeline going to split over it, I wonder? ... Blaperile has a good point. Is this indication that, even in this, John will be able to pick a third option, like how the Vriska/Terezi standoff got resolved? If neither option seems to lead to an entirely satisfactory outcome, he might have to create his own terms somehow.

"Either option offers a tempting means of sustenance. You know the meat will be rich and filling, and if you’re being honest with yourself, you haven’t had the most robust diet as of late. You didn’t even have breakfast. It’s probably a good idea to eat something resembling a real meal for once." So, is MEAT in this allegory John going back into canon, kicking off a new, fulfulling adventure? And CANDY being John staying in the victory state, everything staying happy happy joy joy but ultimately not leading to anything? Then again, MEAT is bloody. The adventure won't be cleanly resolved, just like Homestuck proper had some loose ends.

"But you’re no stranger to Calliope’s tastes, as far as carnivorous comestibles are concerned. You know every cut on that plate is rare to the core. It’ll fill your mouth to bursting with juice, lie heavy on your stomach for hours to come as your body works to break down all the nutritious protein and fat." Aka Hussie tells captivating tales, that we'll need to digest for some time. We should be wary about this.

... Are we going to get a choice as readers at the end of this page? Stay or leave? (Not to be confused with the Brexit poll choices.)

... No!

This is the end of the it, for now!

"To Be Continued" Cooooooool.[/spoiler]

In all honesty, I had been spoiled on my dash that a TBC was incoming, but I didn't know when or if in the meantime the comic might have updated again.

#homestuck #homestuck epilogues #reaction #homestuck liveblog #spoiler alert #upd8 #john egbert #roxy lalonde #calliope

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fics-not-tragedies · 4 years

Text

Be a good boy

This is the fic I told @onebatch--twobatch I’ll write based on the photo above. Yeah it happened. I wrote it.

SUMMARY: Santino hasn’t slept for few days due to another business he has to finish, but you’re here to submit him into the bed. Words: 3632; Warnings: fem!dom smut;

Readers tag list:

Santino had not slept in few days; he had been out there for entire days and nights without so much as a wink of sleep. It was getting ridiculous, you’d go to bed alone and wake up alone; Santino would still be working away where you had left him the night before. The bags underneath his eyes were becoming bruised from a lack of sleep, but his eyes were wide from the cocaine that he was using to stay awake. It was safe to say that he was stressed, more stressed than you had ever seen him, and he wouldn’t tell you why - claiming it was some sort business with the Russian and it was too dangerous for him to say anything to you.

You knew that tonight you were going to have to take matters into your own hands, your husband was a dangerous man anyway but nobody needed him becoming increasingly unstable due to ongoing exhaustion. It wasn’t often that you took control in the bedroom - that was Santino’s thing – he was definitely the dominant one. However, sometimes in times like these Santino needed something else, he needed somebody to make him forget about everything but his desire, he needed somebody to control him. Usually, making Santino submit to you and completely shut down his brain would tire him out so much that he would finally be able to sleep through the night.

Sometimes, he would come to you before it got this far. He was too proud to downright ask you to dominate him so he would be subtle about it, gently pulling you on top of him where he lay in bed and slowly moving your hands upwards to push against his neck. You wouldn’t make him ask, you would simply nod your head and say something along the lines of “are you going to behave yourself tonight, Santino?”

But this wasn’t one of those times, it didn’t look like Santino had even realized the problem, going about his business as usual, but looking increasingly disheveled as the days went by. You admired Santino’s work ethic, but sometimes it worried you sick that he would work himself to death.

On the fourth night, when Santino was still sat in his office reading several letters and looking at maps of god knows what, you decided you had to help him. As you knocked on the door, he looked up for a second and gave you a brief smile.

“Are you coming to bed, Santino?” You had asked, knowing that the answer would be no before the words had even left you lips.

“No, I’ll join you later I just want to finish this” he said, his voice stern. Well, you’d just have to show him who was in control.

“Santino, you will come to bed. It’s been four nights already since you have slept” your tone of voice made him look up, his blue eyes wide in surprise.

“I’m in control of everything, I promise. I will join you in bed soon, bella” he replied, but he didn’t sound so sure now.

“No. Now. Come on” you said, holding the door open in front of you and waiting expectantly for him to stop what he was doing and follow you to the bedroom.

“I just have this one last-” he began.

“No. You don’t” you interrupted him, “Come on Santino, you want to be a good boy don’t you?”

You knew the effect your words would have on him. It was rare, but when he was this exhausted Santino D’Antonio was a true submissive – he just didn’t let his mind turn off from the white noise of the rest of the world. You watched as he slowly stood up, put his papers down, not bothering to organize them on his desk, before he gradually followed you out of the room. Head bowed and flushed cheeks, always embarrassed to give up control to you when he needed it.

You lead him into the bedroom, gesturing for him to sit on the edge of bed. The mattress dipped as he took a seat with his legs parted, so you could stand between them and wrap your arms around his shoulders.

“Santino, I just wish you would look after yourself” you said, pressing a kiss into the top of his head.

“Are you going to look after me now, bella?” He whispered against your chest, you could hear the plea in his tone of voice - this was probably the closest he would ever come to admitting how much he needed to submit to you and shut out the rest of the world.

“Yes, Santino. Yes, baby, I’ll look after you.” You sighed, taking his face into your hands and pressing kisses all over his exhausted face. His eyes slipped closed and you could feel him slowly relaxing in your embrace. “Are you going to be a good boy?”

“Sì, sì, I’ll be good” he had replied softly and you knew he would be, he was far too tired to fight it this time. He wanted you to dominate him, he knew it was the only way he could completely shut the rest of the world out for a while and get some well-deserved rest.

“I love you, you know that don’t you?” You said, pressing one last kiss against his forehead before pushing him to lie back on the bed.

“I know” he responded, his eyes still closed and face beginning to look blissed out - he hadn’t been this comfortable in days.

“Because you’re such a good boy Santino, tonight you’re not going to come until I say you can. Do you understand?” You asked him, caressing his chest softly while you undid the buttons of his shirt, “You won’t come until I’m completely satisfied.”

“What if I do? What if I come?” He questioned, proof that he had yet to fully give up all of his control. You knew he was only asking so he could weigh up the consequences of his actions and make an informed decision on whether coming before you had given him permission was worth it or not.

“You won’t know until you do it and you’re not going to do that, because you’re a good boy” You smiled, not allowing him to overthink the situation - the goal was to get him not thinking at all.

“I won’t, I won’t, I promise, bella” he had sighed as you pulled his shirt off of him, rubbing your hands up and down his bare chest slowly.

“Good” you praised, climbing onto his lap to straddle him. It had been a while since you had felt this connected to him and it was relieving to have your husband so close. You took both of his hands in yours, intertwining your fingers together before guiding them above his head and holding them there.

“No, no, no, please I want to touch, bella…” Santino had whined, knowing you would keep his hands captive so that he could only watch as you used his body for your own sexual gratification, “I want to touch you.”

“No. Not tonight” you said, denying him, “I want you to watch as I come, over and over. Then if you’re good, I might let you touch. I guess if you’re really good, you might be able to come eventually.”

Santino’s blue eyes snapped open, focusing on you above him while you pressed his arms into the mattress above his head. You knew what Santino’s weakness was, he had to please you in every single way - whether it was with flowers, a new dress, or holding himself back from orgasm for as long as you told him to. He wasn’t a people pleaser at all, but god, it bothered him for days if he had disappointed you.

You slowly started to grind down on his lap, pressing your clothed crotch against the bulge in his suit pants. He drew his bottom lip into his mouth and his tired blue eyes watched you avidly as you moved against him.

“Kiss me, bella” he said, eyes pleading but still trying to get you to do whatever it was he desired. It was always so difficult for him to completely let go and let you take over. He hadn’t even realized that he was making demands, too used to being on the dominating side in the bedroom.

You pressed a soft kiss onto his lips before pulling back and tutting at him softly while you continued to grind against his clothed erection, “Santino, I love you sweetheart, but just let go. Give it up and let me look after you.”

“Sorry, I’m sorry, bella” he said quickly, before nodding - letting you know that he would try harder to sink into submission.

“Does that feel good, Santino?” You asked, drawing his mind away from any thoughts other than you and what you were doing, “Do you like me grinding myself against you?”

He groaned softly, Santino loved when you talked dirty to him. Hearing such words come out of your usually so innocent mouth turned him on like nothing else could and you liked to take advantage of that, “Yes, it feels good. So good, bella.”

“I bet it would feel even better when I take my underwear off, wouldn’t it?” You laughed, using one hand to hold Santino’s arms down as you used the other to remove your underwear quickly, “Well it would for me, maybe not for you.”

You hitched your nightgown up above your waist so that there was now nothing between you and Santino’s clothed erection, before grinding against him once again. It felt so good, the rough material of his trousers rubbing against your clit. Santino began rolling his hips ever so slowly, trying to get more friction through his pants - clearly, unable to stop himself from chasing the delicious feeling.

“Please…” he moaned softly, eyes squeezed shut before adding “I can feel how wet you are through my trousers, it’s driving me insane, bella” you clearly were not doing a good enough job if Santino could still articulate himself that coherently.

Ignoring him, you stood up slowly - letting go of his arms and watching him from a few feet away. You used this opportunity to slowly remove the rest of your clothing, Santino’s eyes following your every move.

“Get undressed, Santino” you commanded, standing there and watching him wrestle out of the rest of his clothes at a rapid speed before lying back onto the bed completely naked. His chest was slightly flushed and his cock lying erect against his navel, an obvious sign of his desire, but other than that he looked completely relaxed, “Good. Now, I’m going to stand here and pleasure myself and you’re going to watch. Don’t touch yourself.”

You smiled sweetly at him as you ran your hands slowly down your body, caressing your breasts, your stomach and then your hips before slowly lowering one hand between your legs. You could feel Santino’s eyes watching you as you traced your fingers up and down your folds, his hips were rolling slightly - chasing any kind of friction that unfortunately he would not be able to achieve in this position. It made you smile nonetheless, to see him slowly losing control.

“How are you feeling, Santino?” You asked him, checking to make sure he really was completely letting go.

“Good” he sighed slowly, his lack of words a dead give away that you had all the control tonight.

“Do you like watching me touch myself?” You asked, teasing him. You began to slowly dip two fingers inside of you, the sound of your wetness quietly echoing around the room as you pushed them in and out. Santino moaned softly in response, he wanted you to touch him and fuck, take care of him and the leaking erection that he was sporting. When he didn’t respond, you asked him again. “Santino, answer the question. Do you like watching me touch myself?”

“Sì…” he had groaned, too aroused to form any other coherent thoughts now.

You knew it wouldn’t be long before you were having your first orgasm, the situation becoming too arousing for you to drag it out much longer. You knew that there would be plenty more opportunities for pleasure tonight. So, you moaned loud enough for only Santino to hear and began curling your fingers to hit your g-spot dead on. It only took a few minutes before your walls were clenching around your fingers and you were gasping as your first orgasm washed through your body while Santino watched from his spot on the bed.

“Cazzo” he had whined, his hands twisting in the sheets in an effort to prevent him from taking his own erection into hand.

“Look at how good you are” you praised him, “So desperate, but so good for me.”

“I’m good, for you bella” he sighed, “Trying to be.”

“Yes, I think you deserve a reward, don’t you?” You asked him, climbing on the bed to sit next to him and stroke down his chest lovingly.

“Sì, sì, sì” he replied, desperate to get some kind of attention after watching you for so long.

“You do deserve it, well done” you laughed at his eagerness before straddling his waist and leaning over him to kiss his lips softly, enclosing his wrists in your hands and holding them above his head once again. Still sensitive from your first orgasm, you took just the tip of Santino’s leaking erection inside of you slowly - teasing him by clenching your walls around the tip.

Santino’s eyes flew open and his breath got caught in his throat, after so long of being worked up this was heaven and if he wasn’t careful it would be over before you had given him permission, “Ah, ah, sì, bella, sì” he groaned, gritting his teeth in an effort to keep himself calm.

You began to take him in deeper, sinking down on his cock and grinding against him slowly before lifting yourself back up. The pace was not quick, but he filled you up and the slow grind of your hips made you both desperate for more.

“Cazzo” Santino whined, “Wait, fuck, wait.”

“No. Be good” you warned him, maintaining your slow deep grind on his cock. His eyes had clenched shut, obviously trying to starve off his orgasm.

“So good, fuck, so so good” Santino moaned, he had begun to push against your hand that was holding his wrists above his head, trying to get free, most likely so he could hold your hips and help set the pace as you sank down onto him. You dug your nails into the flesh on his arms, reminding him that he was not in charge and he did not get to touch yet.

You could feel another orgasm building within you, but god, you didn’t want to take Santino over the edge with you while he was trying so hard to hold back like you had asked.

“Santino, I’m so close” you whimpered, “But, I’ve done all the work so far and I think it’s about time you contribute. Use your mouth to make me come.”

“Sì, bella, please” Santino had said, always so eager to please and always so polite when it came to you.

You kissed him lovingly as you lifted yourself off of his cock and positioned yourself with your legs either side of Santino’s head, he would have to lean up and put some effort in if he was going to make you come as he did not have the use of his hands. He wasted no time, quickly using his tongue to rub against your clit - the initial taste of you making him moan which only intensified your pleasure. You were already close, but Santino eating you like he was starving was such a turn on - only pushing you further towards the edge.

“Santino, I’m close” you whined, grinding gently against his face as you grew closer and closer by the second. Sensing that you would come soon, Santino sucked on your clit gently - leaving you screaming at the pleasure that was maybe a little bit too intense. One final grind against Santino’s face had you tumbling over the edge, moaning his name in satisfaction. He was always so good with his mouth, a constant overachiever.

“That was so good, baby, so fucking good” you whispered, when you had finally caught your breath. You moved down his body, taking a seat just above his aching cock and pressed a long kiss against Santino’s wet lips to show your appreciation.

You we’re so over stimulated, but Santino was completely blissed out, clearly heavily affected by you sitting on his face and coming on his tongue. He was so desperate for some release, having watched you come twice already.

“I think you deserve to touch me now, you did such a good job” you said, letting his arms go, “Are you going to touch me while I ride you cock?”

His hands immediately gripped onto your hips, trying to push you down to sit on his cock desperately. You knew this wasn’t him trying to take control of the situation, but him being physically unable to control himself through desperation. You let him have what he needed, sinking down onto his cock, taking his whole length into you.

“Sì, sì, sì, please,” Santino had whined, nails digging into your hips. You took his face into your hands, peppering kisses against his face in the attempt to calm him down. Submissive Santino would get swept up in the pleasure; unable to focus on anything else, but it made him frustrated and desperate when he had been on the edge for so long.

“Santino, look at me” you said. While still riding his cock, you met his gaze - his tired eyes we’re unfocused and dreamy, “I love you, Santino.”

“Please, please, please bella,” he begged. It seemed these were the only words capable of leaving his mouth at this point; he was so close to the edge, holding on desperately for you to give him permission to come.

“Not yet” you said, maintaining the quick pace that you rocked your hips. He furrowed his brows, clearly unsure if he could hold on much longer, “Be good, Santino.”

You were not going to make him wait much longer, already feeling yourself approaching another orgasm as his cock rubbed against your g-spot. You slowly moved the hands that you had resting on his cheeks downwards, giving him time to anticipate what you were going to do and watching him whine in further desperation when he realized.

When you put your hands around Santino’s throat and began to squeeze gently, his eyes closed in ecstasy and his hips started matching your rhythm with added fervor.

“I’m gonna come” Santino had gasped out, voice scratchy while you pressed against his neck. His eyes were rolling back and his hands were squeezing bruises into your hips, you knew he couldn’t wait much longer but wanted to see just how far he would submit to you.

“No you’re not” you warned him, “Not until I do. You will come with me.”

His eyes were watering, as if he was going to cry if he couldn’t come in the next few seconds. You had never seen him like this, acting without any inhibitions and his usually overworked brain only focused on the need to do what you asked him. It was incredible to watch, driving you closer and closer to your third orgasm.

“Santino, are you ready?” You asked, feeling your orgasm growing more powerful - ready to shake through your body. It would only take a couple more rocks of your hips until you would be clenching around his cock in elation.

“Sì, sì, sì” he murmured, as he groaned in pleasure still trying to hold himself back because fuck, you hadn’t said he could come yet. Your hands were still squeezing against his throat; the lack of oxygen was making him dizzy and his whole body was tingling. His eyes opened in shock as he realized he wasn’t going to be able to wait any longer - he was going to come. His balls were drawing up close to his body, ready to finally empty inside of you after waiting for so long, “Oh, cazzo… please. Now - oh cazzo! Please.”

Fuck, it was Santino begging that sent you completely over the edge.

“Santino, come” you screamed, as your orgasm tore through your body at the same time that he let go, coming deep inside of you as his eyes rolled into the back of his head. Your orgasm was even more powerful than the first two, Santino’s cock always making you come so hard.

You had collapsed completely on top of Santino in pleasure, and you continued to lie on his chest while you both caught your breath.

“Santino…” you said breathlessly, running your hand through his sweaty hair. “Baby, you were so good for me. So good.”

“I love you. Love you so much. You took good care of me, bella” he replied, voice groggy from the asphyxiation and the exhaustion taking over his body.

“I always will. Come on, let’s get you under the covers” you said, kissing his forehead before lifting off of him to pull the covers up around your husband. You climbed in next to him and wrapped your arms around him; peppering soft open mouth kisses onto his sweaty skin as you cuddled up together.

“Santino, I do wish you would look after yourself” you sighed, laying your head on his chest. He didn’t reply.

Finally, after four entire days, you could hear his breathing evening out as sleep took over him.

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fics-not-tragedies · 5 years

Text

Dead as dead can be: Part Two

prologue - one - two - three - four - five - six - seven

Well I must admit... it’s been a really hot minute since I posted the first chapter. But but but! I was really kindly asked by few people to update this fic sooner, so here we go. We all are in Hell together!

SUMMARY: Adrienne teases and uses Constantine again after he regains his consciousness. Words: 2184; Warnings: smut (masturbation, blow-job), some blood drinking too;

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“Constantine…” her sultry voice filled his whole head, the unpleasant sinking feeling still overwhelming his whole body, the weight on his chest hasn’t moved an inch. The darkness around him was too consuming, surprisingly too pleasant and he’d much rather stay like that forever, than wake up and face the reality, “Constantine… wake up” he could feel her claws digging into the flesh of his neck, probably leaving another set of harsh marks, like he didn’t had enough of those already.

“Adrienne…” he gasped, his body jolting back into reality, eyes blinking, the unpleasant brightness of her room making him gasp once again.

She was sitting on top of him, straddling his hips, her hand brushing through his hair, “Constantine” her voice seemed louder now, like her lips were closer to his ear, almost brushing against his earlobe.

When he felt her hand creeping downwards from his chest he suddenly moved to sitting position, clasping her both wrists with his hands, “What do you think you’re doing?!” He hissed through his gritted teeth. Adrienne just laughed almost soundlessly, feeling the tight grip of his hands set her into a playful mood.

“All of those things I didn’t had the chance to do to you yesterday…” she purred, raising her eyebrow at him. He gasped out loud, feeling how the blood in his body raced south, where she grinded against him, her hips slowly moving from side to side.

He gripped her wrists tighter and she moaned, the filthy sound exploding in his ears. Her raven hair was loosely falling onto her bare shoulders, her breasts were threatening to spill from the tight crimson corset she was wearing and the flimsy panties she had on were failing in shielding her now wet cunt from the bulge that grew in Constantine’s pants.

“Don’t…” he managed to breath out before he’s again under her spell and he let’s go of her wrists. Adrienne pressed one hand to his bare chest, then began to slowly shift it downwards, her nails teasing his skin.

“Oh, I do…” she teases him, her other hand wrapped around his throat now, giving it a little squeeze, “Bloody hell, Jonathan, you don’t understand just how long I’ve wanted to do this…” Adrienne purred, gripping Constantine’s hair and pulling his head back, tilting it forcefully, John let out a silent gasp, the sound only became strangled as she moved her head down to bite his neck harshly, sinking her teeth into John’s throat deep enough to draw blood, but she pulled away when she tasted the metallic and coppery flavor of the thick red liquid, now trickling down her chin and Constantine’s neck.

“You gonna regret this, I fucking promise you…” he growled through his gritted teeth, his jaw tense, eyes focused on her.

“Perhaps we should stop at the fucking part, baby” she licked the spot on his neck where she bit him, the sound of her moan vibrating on his skin.

“I came here to discuss that fucking letter…” Constantine mumbled out, feeling how her lips were leaving little pin pricks all over his throat. His hand squeezed her hip and she moaned closely to his ear.

“You will come again, soon, I am more than sure about it.”

The woman had him wrapped around her finger once again, strandled under her on her own bed, hopeless and weak, with his delicious chest exposed, the shirt he had on too bloody from her previous teasings to wear it again. The I.V. she ordered quickly helped him feel more alive than he already was and she could feel it now, his cock betraying him again.

“Tell me you want me, John…” Adrienne mumbled out looking up at him, her sharp fangs still visible, “...tell me you want me and you can have my however you want me…” she rolled her hips into his again, receiving a guttural moan as a response.

“What’s the point of it then if I won’t remember anything afterwards?” He pressed his mouth close to her ear, his hot breath tickling her cold skin, “I can see the marks on my body, thanks to your ceiling mirror” he looked upwards and their gazes met through the polished surface, the lustful stare of her darkened pupils too primal, too wild and he was in too deep to turn back now. His skin was covered in lovebites mixing with actual bitemarks, mixing with imprints of her red lipstick, “but maybe I’d like to know how I got them, you see?”

“I had some fun with you last night” she giggled a little, the pair of sharp fangs hanging over her rouged lips a dreadful opposition to the playful sound that just left her mouth.

John gently traced her lips with his thumb and she pricked it with her fang, before letting it slip past her lips, then sucking on it lighty, making him groan, “I think I get what ‘fun’ means in your dictionary, little evil mistress.”

“Keep calling me that, Constantine, and I’d let you fuck me” he growled upon hearing her words, feeling how his pants slowly begin to fail at taming his raging erection, “I can feel that you’re quite desperate…”

“Evil mistress” he blurted out again and she grinned widely. Then she wrapped her both hands around his throat and he let out a choked moan.

“Exciting, isn’t it?” Her vicious tongue licked across his neck, leaving a wet path all the way up to his jaw line. Her nails raked through the skin of his chest and he whimpered, another moan leaving his mouth when she wiggled her hips faster this time, his throbbing erection strained by the fabric of his pants brushing against her still clothed cunt again and again.

“Be a good boy, baby” she squeezed his neck again and he fell back onto the bed, inhaling air sharply.

He sighed out with relief when she reached into his pants, started massaging his already semi-hard length through the fabric of his underwear, dipping forward to attach her lips to his neck, sucking gently on his skin the way that was driving him absolutely insane, right below his ear, like she knew the soft spot that weakened his knees and hardened his cock

Constantine arched his neck to the side to give her better access and she brought her hand to the back of his head, angling it slightly so he could reach better, suckling, kissing at his neck, adding more to the previous marks she left there.

“O-oh, fuck…” he sighed, his hips once again stirring upwards, “P-Please…”

She hummed, biting down lightly on his neck, deciding not to tease him too much, reaching into his underwear to pull out his cock, wrapping her fingers around it and starting to stroke him slowly, enjoying the way he moaned instantly, bucked his hips upwards. She let her tongue wander across the skin of his neck, soothing all of the new bitemarks.

“Oh, for fuc-… Adrienne, please…”

She smiled against his skin, her fangs still out and in full of their spiky glory, pricking his neck a little, before she started to move her hand faster, her fingers wrapped tightly around him as she pumped him, his little breaths and moans encouraging her, fuelling her already blown out ego. His Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat as he swallowed hard and she trailed her mouth downwards, sucking lightly at his throat, but don’t really biting him, just teasing a little, his heavy breath, the way she was slowly making him come undone, slowly making him weak staring to get to her and she pressed her legs together, the dull throbbing between her thighs becoming more and more prominent.

“My little evil mistress, I need-…”

She hummed loudly, “Mmmm, you need what, baby?” Adrienne whispered, lifting her head to look back at him, meeting his gaze, his eyes wide, begging her silently, “Do you want me to put my mouth on you, Constantine? Again?”

He swallowed hard again, his breath shaky as he exhaled, “F-Fuck, yes…” he stuttered, “Adrienne… please.”

“Oh… since you asked so nicely.”

He nodded eagerly, pressing his lips together, his eyes fluttering shut when she tugged on his hair again, then she shuffled backwards and bent forward and she gave him a few more pumps before opening her mouth and letting him sink past her lips, tight and soft around him and she pressed her tongue flat to the underside of his cock, holding her breath when she felt his hips buck forward again slightly, allowing him to push into the back of her throat, swallowing hard around him.

A strangled moan fell from his lips, his breathing now shallow and quick, “Oh, Adrienne, you’re so fu-…” Constantine drawled, his voice instantly trailing off into another moan as she swirled her tongue around him, gasping when she lifted her head and took a breath, only to tease him, but still not letting him slide of her mouth completely, suckling on the tip greedily while pumping the base of his cock with her clawed hand.

“Tell me, baby, I am what?” She asked teasingly, drawing little circles into the swollen tip of his cock.

His chest was rising and falling quickly, his bottom lip caught between his teeth and she looked up at him, his eyes instantly meeting hers, wide and focused on watching her every move carefully.

“Evil” he breathed out, “You’re fucking evil.”

“But I know you love the evil in me” she winked at him, before closing her eyes and taking all of him into her mouth again, hollowing her cheeks, then starting to suck him properly, steadying herself on his thigh with her other hand. He was breathing unevenly, praises rolling off his tongue continuously, his voice deeper and she could feel the tension slowly leaving his body, moaning around him and sending vibrations up his body. He threw his head back with a soft sigh, his eyes shut tightly.

“You’re so fucking good at it… you should be giving other girls lessons on how to suck cock properly…”

She took him all the way into her mouth again, past her rouged lips pressed tightly to him to create more friction until she felt his tip at the back of her throat again, swallowing around him and holding him there for a moment, his breath hitching in his throat and she whimpered as he pulled her up by the hair, breathing out shakily.

Adrienne looked back at him with wide eyes, growling through her gritted teeth, “Baby?”

“Don’t want to… f-fuck, I … I want to be inside y-you…”

Her lips curled into a smile and she reached out to brush her fingers through his hair again, “How do you want me, baby?”

Constantine swallowed hard, “F-fuck, Adrienne, I want you on top of me…” he drawled, biting his lip. “Want to watch you ride me…”

She smirked, leaning in to press a soft peck to his lips, the look on his face priceless when she drew back to slide of the bed. His eyes were blown wide when he watched her shuffle out of her corset, his face raw red and before she could even step out of her flimsy underwear, he grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her eagerly back onto the bed, his arms wrapped tightly around her, lips on hers in no time, hungry, desperate, his tongue demanding entrance into her mouth and she parted her lips, moaning quietly.

“Mmm, want to do it your way, baby?”

“You’re so fucking hot… and evil, I need you so bad…” he sighed against her lips, kissing her deeply, his grabby hands toying with her breasts, giving her nipples a little squeeze.

She ran her fingers through his hair again, rolling her hips against his, his hard cock brushing right up against her clit and she moaned into his mouth, breathing shakily as she began to slowly grind on him again.

He moaned, biting her lip teasingly, shifting to adjust her position. His hands on her breasts, his lips eagerly on hers, kissing her passionately as his fingertips toyed with her hard nipples.

Adrienne leaned forward, pressed her body against his, his hands warm and rough against her skin and she moaned, “Mmmm, Constantine…” Adrienne whined, rolling her hips into his again, crying out quietly, her mind clouded with lust, desperate to feel more, feel him inside her.

He broke the kiss, looking back at her with a lustful gaze, “You’re so fucking hot…”

She raised her eyebrow at him, looking down and sitting up to push herself to her knees, a soft gasp escaping his lips when she gripped his cock again, angling her hips just right and pushing her underwear aside, positioning his tip against her entrance.

He breathed out shakily, forced his eyes open to look back at her, halting all of his movements, “You think you can handle this, baby?” She looked up at him, cocking an eyebrow, before he let out a shaky breath and nodded eagerly few times.

“I’m all yours, evil mistress…”

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