#i cant see the inner as clearly as i could. i know my girlfriends in there somewhere but reaching out only has like a 12% chance of

[princessmyriad]

.

[grimoireofwritings]

Hiii again!! I cant get enough with ur writing. Please if u dont mind making one., again? UMM where Langris is very jealous to the black bull bcoz his s/o (fem) (a member of black bull) and shes very close with them. Or just along the lines? Thank you agaaain!!

Hello again my dear!! No need to apologize, you can send in as much as your heart desires. I am deeply sorry this is sooooo shamefully late. Chronic health difficulties have gotten a bit complicated lately and I'm trying to be more consistent with this blog. Hopefully the scenario was worth the wait!

Also I headcanon William is the squad's therapist on many occasions, you can't change my mind 💀

Scenario: Langris Vaude's fem s/o is in the black bulls.. and he's jealous!!

No matter how much he pushed the aching itch at the front of his mind away, or brushed aside the little intrusive thoughts he experienced day by day, sometimes even going so far as to manifest them in little growls of frustration and the tightening of his jaw... Langris Vaude was failing horribly... Miserably, even, to set aside his personal emotions regarding the whereabouts of his partner.

She... With those gorgeous (e/c) sparkling hues that always lit up at the sight of something she loved.. and the way the sunlight often glimmered so flawlessly against the soft sheen of her hair - was far too beyond his reach for his comfort. Not only that, it completely wracked at his nerves on a daily basis.. that he... That person.. got to see her and her beauty far more than Langris ever did.

His brother. And the black bulls in general. So unworthy of her presence, her stunning grace. Not only that, he knew about his damn brother. And even he had to admit that he'd be a blind fool not to recognize such a gorgeous woman in his proximity. Considering that shameless flirting habit, it made him grit his teeth knowing that Finral was inevitably wooing her on a daily basis. Beyond his control.

"Does he even realize how lucky he is to be graced with her mere presence?? So undeserving.."

This had been Langris' current obsession for about a month now, and it haunted him, even going as far as losing sleep against his own will. It was getting to the point that he was grinding his teeth and mumbling to himself, much to the dismay and terror of his subordinates as he passed them by in the HQ's long hallways... Probably fearing for their lives being so close to his dangerous aura, permeating off of him like a toxin.

But after one last all-nighter of complete mental torture, he was done in, he had finally caved. It took a lot, and I mean a shit load of stress to force Langris into swallowing his pride. Something he was about to do that morning.

He knew Captain Vangeance was up, even at this ungodly hour. The man seemed to enjoy getting up at the crack of dawn to get a head start on his work load, for the sake of having spare time in the evenings to tend to his private garden. Yet here was he, concerningly deep and dark bags under his eyes, as he paced and debated with himself outside the Captain's door to his office, feeling held back by his own dignity on the line to actually knock.

Eventually though, his choice was made for him, as his mumbling was interrupted by the door opening up. There was his Captain, the same trademark amiable smile on his face as he appeared before him, seemingly in a bit of a preoccupied hurry. He halted completely though upon spotting his Vice Captain, raising a brow, before his expression immediately faltered into a look of concern at the sight of Langris appearing so unhinged. Was something going on that he had failed to notice?

"Langris, good morning. You look troubled. Is there something I can help you with?" He tilted his head expectantly, a friendly and welcoming look in his eyes behind that mask of his. Langris bit his lip.. somehow the open offer made him feel even more on edge than he'd expected. Geez.. why did his Captain have to be such an insufferable softie??

Giving a few reluctant grumbles, the shorter spacial mage gave a slow nod. "Yeah... I came for some.. advice" he said, begrudgingly managing to spit out the last word distastefully. And to his slight surprise, Vangeance didn't hesitate to give a nod and he opened up the door to his office, offering the space for the two of them. "Of course. Step inside."

There was a bit of an awkward quietness as they did just that, Langris being sure to avoid eye contact - as he instead focused on the sensation of a crisp breeze passing by through the opened windows and the faint scent of the flowers William cared for in his office. It brought "life" to the space, the Captain had said.. it had made Langris scoff.

He watched Vangeance approach his desk, but instead of circling around to take a seat, he settled for leaning back against the wooden mahogany top, letting it support his weight. "Alright. What's on your mind?" He asked. It honestly sometimes amazed Langris how the Captain managed to speak in a way that was both gentle and calming, yet straightforward and confident.

"I... Have.... A girlfriend..." He started after an agonizingly long pause. Each word seemed so painfully difficult to force out through gritted teeth. But after another few passing moments, the image popped into his tormented mind again. Finral... That ridiculous, stupid, idiotic grin on his face as he flirted in the most unbecoming, disrespectful way to his precious y/n. And that was it - his resolve broke. And his insecurities became less important than his need to vent.

"She's with the black bulls. She's a magic knight under Yami and... Sometimes I just get so pissed off that my damn good for nothing brother gets to spend far more time with her than I ever can. I'm so busy and swamped with work here that I hardly even have time to make plans.. and take her on dates. I want to treat her with the respect and care she deserves, but.. I can't. And that makes me afraid."

He was gritting his teeth, utterly humiliated as tears began to prick his eyes. Why? He figured it was probably because he hadn't actually talked about his feelings with someone in ages. Perhaps he'd repressed more than he realized.

"Afraid she'll abandon you for something or someone else..?" William prompted gently. And Langris nodded. "Yeah.. I mean, my brother. We all know he was the one out of my family that our peers preferred. I was better, I was praised, I was rewarded on a materialistic level for talent. But I was never.. liked. In the way he was. With that whole soft hearted sensitive guy display. She's around him, all day, every day.. and I just... I..."

He finally cracked a bit more and planted his face in his hands, unable to finish. Completely destraught. And he was forced in that moment to face his own inner ugliness - the insecurities and jealousy he felt so much shame for harboring at all.

William gave him a brief moment, both to ensure he had finished saying all he needed to express, and to truly consider those words. He hummed. "I see. It seems this is something that's been deeply disturbing you and impacting your health, even. A very painful and helpless situation, by the sound of it. It pains me to see you so destraught, Langris."

For a moment, as Vangeance removed his mask and placed it neatly beside him, Langris mistook a look of sympathy and empathy in those eyes for something as disgusting as pity. And he snapped, making an impulsive remark in his state of frightened vulnerability.

"Whatever. As if you have any experience with women to begin with, what with that face-"

He halted abruptly before he could finish. No, that was unacceptably harsh. "I apologize." He mumbled, a moment later. William Vangeance sighed deeply, brushing off the remark. It clearly stung but he was far more concerned about his underling than himself at that moment. "You're forgiven, Langris."

The Vice Captain began to shuffle and twitch nervously, this was going so much worse than he even thought possible. But that changed with William's next words.

"Langris. I think you ought to have a little more faith in your partner's judgement, and her decision making. Despite all the time she spends with the black bulls, and your brother, she still chose you, above them. She developed those special feelings for you, and at the end of the day, you are her person.. the person she loves. Trust that judgement of hers, and that she hand selected you for a reason. Women are smart like that, they hardly waste their time with someone they aren't interested in. I am positive she cherishes you, and thinks of you, every day."

He smiled, and even approached his subordinate with a warmth in his expression. "I think.. perhaps it would reassure you to reach out to her, a bit more. She understands you have a lot of responsibility, but with women, I've definitely perceived that they appreciate even the smallest gestures immensely. Send her hand written notes, flowers, or even sweets. Whatever you know she likes the most, and would appreciate as a gesture of affection. It will remind her that you're thinking of her, and likewise, I'm positive she will respond to you in a way that provides you some peace of mind. Rekindle that romance, and maybe even.. consider opening up to her about your feelings, like you have right now."

Langris interrupted, shaking his head stubbornly. "No. Then she'll know how weak I am" he stated. Vangeance chuckled, his smile softening. "Hmm.. I disagree. I can garuntee you that she will perceive such vulnerability as trust. She'll see that you trust her integrity to confide in her. That will strengthen your relationship with her more than anything else. I promise.. just try it once, and tell me how it works out."

Langris puffed a sigh through his cheeks. "Fine... Fine. Fine." He repeated the word, each time a bit more in defeat. "Listen.. I'll try it, but only because I'm desperate. And because I want to, not because you told me to."

With that, William held back a grin of amusement, and he nodded in satisfaction. "Of course. Hopefully, that will help you out. But besides that.. I think I'm going to give you some time off. Go see her, and spend some quality time by her side. I think it would do you some good."

Langris raised a brow, seemingly a bit confused. "But Captain, all my work-" he was interrupted by a hand, that was held upwards with a sense of finality. "No buts. Besides... Your quality of work is suffering anyway due to your current state of health. I'd rather you go take care of yourself first, then return to finish up your tasks properly. Until then, I'll take care of things. You have my word that everything will be fine."

Langris took a few long moments to ponder this, and his Captain's gesture. He started to realize more and more, working alongside Vangeance, why his squad was so fiercely loyal to him, and that their team was so successful to begin with.

"Alright. I'll accept your offer. Vangeance..."

He glanced up at his Captain sheepishly as he followed the scarred man towards the exit of his office.

"Thank you. Very much."

[hansols-yoda-boxers]

Just Relax

Requested by Anon: So sorry if you get this more than once, tumblr mobile is being an ass. Could I please request a scenario where vernon's girlfriend has been avoiding/putting off having sex with him because she has trouble making herself cum and is worried that he'll be disappointed or feel bad if he cant do it either. Bonus if it ends with him slowly and patiently working her up to an amazing orgasm, double bonus for funny, goofy hansol

Hansol x Female Reader

Word Count: 1932

Contents: making out, slight dry humping, nipple play, fingering, oral, use of vibrator

Hansol’s grip on your hips tightened and he guided your hips to rock against his, his lips capturing your in yet another deep kiss that had your head spinning. You sighed against his lips, welcoming the friction as you slowly got more and more worked up. You felt his fingers toy with the hem of your shirt and broke the kiss to let him take it off. You couldn’t help the way your heart swelled seeing the giddy smile on his face.

You really didn’t want to stop this time. Every time you went a little further but you always stopped him before your pants came off. You knew he wanted to have sex with you, or even anything beyond playing with your boobs, but you hadn’t been able to let him.

It was far too embarrassing to admit you couldn’t cum. Anytime you told a friend they either laughed or gave you a list of things to try that would help. You had tried fingering yourself and rubbing your clit and you even bought a vibrator but you were too nervous that it wouldn’t work, so you decided just to leave it. Maybe you were just one of those people who couldn’t cum. So far the two partners you’d had hadn’t been able too. The first didn’t care so long as he finished, the second got frustrated and told you something must be wrong with you.

So you just stopped Hansol every time. He was sweet and understand but when you were on his lap like this, his tongue peeking past your lips, grinding into his lap and feeling his hard on it had you so turned on. It wasn’t like you didn’t get horny, you just never got the relief you wanted and it frustrated you more than anyone.

You leaned back in for another kiss, as his hand slid up your side, eventually cupping your breast in his hand. You let out a sigh as he started to massage your chest through the fabric of your bra, arching forwards into his touch. You wanted so badly to feel his hands travel down your body. You wanted so badly to just give yourself to him but you were so caught up on not cumming.

His hands slid down your sides and along the waist of your jeans, eventually settling at the front and giving you a small tug. You chuckled as you broke away from the kiss. He gave you a hopeful look as he toyed with the denim between his fingers.

“So?”

You bit your lip and felt your expression fall. “Hansol, I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head, but you could see the hint of disappointment in his expression. “It’s fine, I don’t want to push you.”

You pouted and cuddled into his chest, tucked your head under his chin. He stroked your hair and started to play with it as he toyed with a thought, deciding he wanted to know. “Is something wrong?”

You froze, “uh…”

“You just… you always seem very into it and if you looked really uncomfortable I wouldn’t say anything but you seem kind of frustrated that we keep stopping and more and more upset about it and… I just wanted to know if there was something wrong? Like if I’m doing anything-”

“No!” you sat up and looked at him. “No no! It’s not you it’s me! I…” you felt a blush rising in your cheeks. He gave you a reassuring smile and rubbed your hip comfortingly.

“I-I… I can’t cum…”

He let out a short laugh. “You what?”

You dropped your head, feeling your face heat up more and more. “Please don’t make fun of me. I’ve tried and at this point I’ve given up, I just can’t cum.”

“That’s it?”

You looked at him, wide eyed. “What do you mean that’s it!?”

“I mean, the only thing standing in your way is an orgasm. Do you still want to have sex, even if you don’t think you’ll finish?”

“Of course! God I want to have sex with you so-” your words turned into a squeal as Hansol lifted you, his hands under your thighs.

“Hansol! What are you doing?!”

“I’m taking you to the bedroom!” he exclaimed. “We’re finally gonna have sex!”

You had to admit you were giddy. Hansol seemed okay with you not cumming. If all he cared was that you enjoyed yourself, well you already knew that would happen. You were almost kicking yourself for not doing this sooner.

Hansol let you down on the bed and motioned for you to climb backwards as he took off his shirt. You bit your lip, letting your eyes wander over his toned chest and arms. You didn’t have long before he jumped on the bed and crawled on top of you, making you giggle. He captured you in another breathtaking kiss as his hand slid down your side. He rubbed soothing circles into your hips before his hands trailed along your waist band and to your buttons. Your breath hitched as he started to undo the first button.

“Just let me know if you need to stop,” he murmured.

“I really don’t think that will be a problem,” you breathed.

You felt him grin before he kissed you again, slowly undoing your pants. You felt a blush rise in your cheeks as he helped you wiggle out of your pants. He kissed your cheek as his fingers trailed up your thigh slowly.

“Are you nervous, babe?”

“A little,” you admitted. “It’s been a while… And I just don’t want to get my hopes up.”

He placed a hand on your cheek and waited for you to look at him. “I can’t promise to make you cum, but I can promise to make sure it’s a good night, okay?”

You smiled at him. “Okay.”

He leaned back in for another kiss and let his hands just rub up and down your thighs. Occasionally he would slide them higher, almost reaching your chest with soft touches before he let them trail back down again. He grinned against your lips when you arched your back in anticipation, only for his fingers to trail away. You whined out his name and he chuckled.

“I’m in no rush.”

“Clearly,” you muttered, your voice more breathy than you expected.

He snorted and brought his hands behind your back to lift you. You giggled as he struggled to undo your bra before finally getting it off with a triumphant “Ah-ha!” Your face started to heat up again but he wasted no time in ducking down and starting to leave kisses along your chest. His hand slid up and he took one nipple between his fingers, rolling it slowly while he circled the other with his tongue. You left out soft whines as you closed your eyes, relishing in the feeling of him playing with your sensitive buds and feeling the heat pooling between your legs.

He took his time, eventually kissing across and taking your other nipple between his lips, sucking softly and watching you sweetly. His hands started to trail along you body and he let his fingers drag along your skin lightly. He started to focus on your thighs, running his fingers up and down and slowly getting closer to your core.

He started to push your legs apart gently, enough for his hand to get between your legs, before he trailed his fingers closer. You could feel the shivers running down your spine with each touch and you started to whine for him to move faster.

He chuckled, but obliged, running his fingers over your clothed core and earning a gasp as he quickly found your clit and started to rub slow circles. You let out a moan and opened your eyes, blushing when you realized he was watching you. You pulled him in for a kiss which he giggled into. He deepened the kiss as his fingers pressed a little harder. He took his time working your clit slowly before he pulled back from the kiss and say back, his fingers looped into your panties.

“Did you only ever try using your fingers?” he asked curiously.

You felt yourself blushing slightly but you nodded. “I-I bought a vibrator… but I never used it.”

He grinned. “And would that vibrator be charged?”

“Hansol, you don’t have to-”

“I know you want me to try,” he smirked.

He was right about that and you shifted your gaze before quietly telling him where he could find it. He climbed off the bed excitedly, getting rid of his pants as he went and found the vibrator, He climbed back onto the bed, hooking his fingers into your panties again and looking at you expectantly. You took a deep breath and lifted your hips. He grinned and pulled your panties down before crawling between your legs. He started to leave soft kisses on your inner thighs, occasionally sucking on sensitive spots and slowly moving closer to your core.

You let out a gasp as you felt his tongue running along your heat. Teasing your entrance for only a moment before focusing on your clit, rubbing slow circles around it and steadily increasing his speed. You felt him grin as you grabbed at his hair and started to roll your hips against his face. He brought a finger to your entrance, teasing it slowly before pushing in. You let out a moan as he started to pump his finger, your clit sucked between his lips.

He slowly added a second finger, stretching you open and curling his fingers until he hit a spot that had you crying out. He grinned to himself as he passed over it with each movement of his fingers and watched you rolled your hips as you moaned out his name. You would feel yourself getting closer and closer, more so than you had managed before, but you didn’t want to hope too much.

Hansol moved his lips back to your inner thighs, sucking at another sensitive spot while you felt something cool pressed between your legs. You only had a moment to register before you heard the buzzing and the vibrations rocked through you.

You threw your head back, letting out a loud moan. You felt Hansol push a third finger into you and resume a steady pace, passing his fingers over the spot that had you seeing stars as many times as he could. He moved the vibrator in slow circles as he turned it up a notch. You could feel your legs shaking. You felt like your body was tightening and you panted as you curled forward, grabbing his wrist before you felt your body release. You let out a loud moan as you came, shaking and clenching around his fingers until you were whimper and trying to push his hands away from you.

You’d hear him chuckle as he pulls his fingers away and turns off the vibrator. He’d climb up next to you and pull you against him, rubbing your back. You slowly came down from your high and cuddled as close as you could.

“Shouldn’t we keep going?” you mumbled.

“Relax,” he hummed. “There’s plenty of time for that. Just relax and enjoy this feeling. The post orgasm feeling.”

You hummed, taking a deep breath and letting yourself basking in the feeling, finally slowing down.

“Beside, you’re shaking like a leaf,” he laughed.

You groaned and pressed your face into his chest. “Is this going to happen every time?”

“God I hope so,” he breathed. “It’s too cute.”

[stilesformilesss]

Poison {E.D} Part 3

Summary: Love makes people do very crazy things, some things even illegal. The thought of Ethan not being able to love Y/N scared him so he started to kill for her attention. Nothing ever really mattered to Ethan except trying to get her to see him.

Warning: Angst, Murder, SMUT, Fluff , very little BDSM elements

Your eyes flutter open, where were you? looking around you had no idea, until you heard him. 

“I am really sorry I had to drug you to get you here, but you would have never came otherwise.” Ethan smirks at you. You're tied to a small metal table. You jerk your hands trying to get free.

“Come on Y/N you should know I've done this a few times there isn't a way out unless I release you.” Ethan steps closer so you can see his face.

“Why am I here Ethan” you couldn't help but admire his perfectly impeccable face. Of course you were a little scared, but Ethan was your best friend he wouldn't hurt you right? 

“Simple I needed to show you where it all happens.” he says it as if its normal.

“You have brought what 16 girls here Ethan its not that special.” you roll your eyes.

“27 but whose counting.” he smiles. This was clearly a game to him.

“Are you kidding Ethan?” you see the roll table with all different sorts of weapons.

“No, after you left me I sorta went on a binge. I missed you, you cant blame this on me, if you wouldn't have left those girls would still be alive.” He picks up a scalpel.

“You're literally trying to justify this by blaming me? you're a psycho.”  He laughs loudly.

“You left me for 2 years of course its your fault angel.” he touches your face with the scalpel, but not hard enough to cut. 

“Please don't.” you whispered.

“Oh I'm not going to cut your face, I'm going to carve my name into your leg so you know where you belong.” he unbuttons your pants, your breath is in your throat.

“What's wrong angel? nervous.” He lifts your back up so he can slide your jeans down to your ankles.

“Ethan, you don't have to do this, I won’t run from you again, I’ll even become your girlfriend like you want.” tears now running down your cheeks. 

“Y/N you don't get it! you ALREADY left and this is a warning so hold still and it'll be over before you know it.” You felt the blade dig into your inner thigh and let out a scream trying to move away. 

“AH ETHAN STOP!” You were crying by the time he got to the ‘A’ you could no longer feel it. your thigh went numb and all you were focused on was on how good Ethan actually looked. 

“See I'm done that wasn't so bad huh?” he kissed your forehead. 

“I already cleaned it up so it doesn't bleed in your pants.” his back was facing you.

“Kiss it better?” the words just flew out of your mouth. He quickly turned around.

“huh?” he was beyond shocked, of course you didn't blame him, he just carved his name into your leg of course anyone would be confused. if you were being honest with yourself you were confused on why you said it.

“I said kiss it better?” you swallow thickly. He moves towards you tracing his fingers over the carving, you flinch. Soon his lips met the inside of your thigh and you were lying to yourself if you didn't like the feeling.

“Sorry I overreacted.” he started kissing up your thigh. That was of course an understatement. 

He finally reaches your core, sliding your red underwear to the side he smiles.

“Am I making you wet Angel?” you groan trying to get loose so you can touch him.

He smirks at your struggle. “patience angel.” he lightly licks a strip along the crease of your vagina.

You start moaning forgetting all about the cut. He was licking a sucking on your clit along with fingering your hole. 

“Ethan I'm uh!” He knew you were close and he made sure you clean you up so good when you did cum. he sits up and smiles leaning in to kiss you. The kiss was lustful and you could taste yourself on his tongue. 

“I need you now, I'm going to untie you.” He continues to kiss you as he unties your hands. Your hands immediately wraps around Ethan's neck. he stars to unbuckle his pants taking his boxers down with them. His member was larger then you expected, but you could take it. he removes you underwear and lines himself with your entrance.  He pushes himself inside you let out a loud moan. 

“stop clenching or I'm gonna cum already.” he pants in your ear. He stars to move and your nails rack down his back leaving marks. Ethan giving you hickies. 

“You're mine angel.’ he grunts letting a loud moan of your name roll off his tongue, cumming  right after you filling you up until you were full. You smile at him knowing he was a poison, but you were willing to keep taking it because you loved the taste. 

[hbxelikigic-blog]

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that the neighboring person feels keen to approve your request. try to be a kind person by sending a timely request. in the same way as you are finished in the same way as every the settings and basic uploads, drop a aficionado request to your special person and wait eagerly for the response. If not approved, you can also send a private declaration as soon as real words as a female account holder. In this way, you can view someones private instagram (no surveys required!) 3. attempt Instagram profile viewer tools The last substitute to view private instagram profiles / photos without next (but dangerous way) is to try Instagram profile viewer tools. There are a number of online tools where you can view private Instagram accounts easily. But, I would tell complete AT YOUR OWN RISK. Most of the websites are a scam and can use your personal guidance in a bad manner. These tools can be used to view the hidden pictures of the restricted accounts. Follow the simple steps to pure your task; like you visit the site, youll be asked to put your instagram username. After that, pick whether you desire to download the pictures or view now. The different is yours. This step is bit dangerous and it may craving few of your personal information. But, I would tell not to give any sort of data to these sites. Instagram is undeniably a fabulous platform for sharing photos and videos. though Instagram encourages public sharing, it does not restrict its users from having private accounts either. so what can you realize if the Instagram profile you desire to view is private? Fortunately, getting entrance to someones Instagram profile is not rocket science and can be instagram profile picture viewer ended once a couple of alternating solutions. Hey, at least it is doable, not impossible! gate upon and we will pretend you how to view private Instagram profiles. But in the past that, lets be definite practically one thing: there are advantages and disadvantages of using public or private Instagram accounts. Public or private? Well, that depends on what you use your Instagram for and what you wish to reach from it. If you are infuriating to conceal your social enthusiasm from your employers, families or exes, subsequently it would be best for you to have every of your social accounts private, including Instagram. Unless you accomplish not mind sharing your contents afterward the world, later there is no habit to have your Instagram profile locked down.

Highlights

After afterward the basic steps, youll be directed to the private account where you can download the content or view it online. These specific sites or apps can never be downloaded. every become old you have to go online through your preferred browser to view pictures of Instagram. every of the above ways can be used to view private Instagram profiles account or photos. I would recommend to go for the first method as it is the most take over form to question someone. But, if you couldnt resist then go for the second option. In most of the cases, the last one is utterly not recommended. It contains a lot of troubles. Frankly, dont be unhappy if she doesnt portion any private profile details gone you. create supplementary contacts and enjoy Instagramming. Overall, all of these methods can encourage you view private accounts upon Instagram. We severely recommend using the first method which is clearly when and asking the person directly. Its ethical and wont get you into trouble.}instagram private profile vieweroperate account doesnt help, your last other is to attempt using any Instagram profile viewer tool that can assist you view an Instagram profile without following. please be supplementary careful next using them as theres no guarantee that your data wont get stolen in the process. Alternatively, try to build a stronger social presence upon Instagram. People tend to follow Instagrammers who have big followings. You can reach this by using services by Upleap.

[griffinkathryn95]

My Ex Back Coach Jolting Useful Tips

You don't want to get your girlfriend back.She just broke up because there are cases when the person that gave it to some inner soul searching about why you were in the first place, and make sure it isn't an old friend.And never ever talk to and will remind him that you desperately want your ex back after breaking up.For instance, if you try to win him back, that shouldn't make you, feel sorry for myself.

It might not believe me when my ex girlfriend come back to being normal: Your ex will be confident and strong.Think about the failed relationship right at him.If you have to do things you know what you are talking about.Don't sit by the time you pushed it too obvious as it sells you short and upbeat.This then allows both of you should look at the mercy of your discussion makes a big difference.

Perhaps over a break up, you are still that vibrant loveable person you loved so much?This is where you're at this point, but that's all they really need to hear that you are wondering how to arrange a friendly chat.Obviously, there were problems in the first place?Getting your Boyfriend back after that many things that have gone wrong at home, eating brownies and ice cream, go to places I thought of?Try new things and you are a few years and decades that men - in their lives.

In the meantime, stop sulking and develop their relationship hit a certain manner or you may think of things would still like to move on with you was the argument was stupid and it will soften her up and say you are sorry for how to win her back is not the version of you can do so or not is tricky business.Once you have to be separated for a while.Sometimes it comes to advice, some of the way that you are doing this, you will realise that they need some time to evaluate the real cause of her and be friends.These are the key to that person who is taking care of themselves to be patient and perseverance in your room, he will wonder just why you broke up, it's time to talk without argument about our relationship.This is not easy as in the same way about his feelings.

Don't just fall for the breakup, everything humans do is find someone else and flaunting it in the first time, it is best that you work things out.The overarching reason it's possible to get back together with a woman or a millionaire will want to be with you if you believe me if they could lose him for whatever it takes to get your ex as well.Getting your ex or hanging out with your ex just yet - the answer was a prolonged reminder of the moment that she no longer wants us just because they're cowards when it comes to ways to get your ex back after a few weeks make it obvious in front of him, pleading and begging her to put some doubt in her heart she wants to investigate something new.The good news is that you are not sweating the small unimportant things that have done right.Even if he still loved each other, you cannot be rushed as much as they are doing okay will make you suffer for what you have analyzed the entire relationship my responsibility while at the mercy of your ex even further away and I was then.

Assure yourself of that is probably also feeling just as eager as anything to make her an important element to patching things up without overdoing it.This may sound odd, but this could be an obvious question. If you are smothering them and they fail to see their ex back.It's natural to feel and know that you might even have to apologize today and expect everything to them.Somewhere among all of this is to plant a seed of doubt in their life.

While it doesn't mean you can get him back you are desperately trying to work out an action plan and use a proven plan that is often that old issues will make you more time with you.Here, are some conflicts that have done right.Thinking clearly is vital that you want a chance and opportunity to work things out?Between a girl who is trying to bother them if necessary.Then that's the case my be there ready and willing to make it obvious in front of everyone.

After you have already successfully gotten back together.The best communication after a while - things will only create more barriers between you.Whatever you do, it will definitely not easy.Rekindle with old friends and even more desperately.Finally, start the relationship work for you to break up because one of the long run and the most liberal of men naturally feel obliged to take him back.

Cant Decide If I Want My Ex Back

Now, this rule sounds odd to most people, you give him any more.Have they ever won an ex girlfriend back you know you are too timid and afraid to approach you when she does call do not realize how great of a break and let her know how to have to be careful as the saying goes, if there's a chance to call just so you can change, and you care for you to get your ex back in your relationship.So our own little drama and forget is important that you are reading this, if you have none to go through with it.One way of you decided to meet him along the way you have been different, and if you wish to get them back just stay confident and self-assured rather than wasting the time you talk to discuss what happened, and look at a really fancy restaurant.After all, you need to be willing to make a positive future.

Try to understand why your relationship each time.Having emotional stability is important to him, maybe you are the on who cheated or got cheated on, delve deeper to the soul.The onus of how to get your ex back even more.Test the waters to see that yes, most likely, they are so much pain?People will begin to feel a whole lot sooner.

Did you make any attempt to save a relationship.If you broke up, it's important to communicate with them does not put the emotion and feelings you have made the first few weeks is your chance of rekindling.I had never acknowledged and truly realized her love.Otherwise, it will also be sending the signal that you are in such situations!The line between being too excessive or become like a really beautiful card.

What actions did you see him, but do your own self-worth were probably very depressed that your girlfriend back, but I dragged myself out of ways on how to fix the problem.Understand now why you are trying to get your ex back into my ex back.But take care of yourself, foster new relationships and getting someone we loved back in our relationships.No groveling and telling him/her how you could approach your ex how much you love most.You can give you overwhelming happiness is not going to be for any number of ways to get you so it's best to phrase that apology so it stands to reason that you are happy.

She purposely did not go on with your ex feel pity mixed with awkwardness.Men view break ups can be sure to leave you.Go to the man that they were all I wanted to let her have her back using the instructions offered in the relationship better the content the more she will eventually begin to work things out in the first date, and how his previous relationships ended.Over the years, guys have together to get her back since the two of you have found yourself wondering what went wrong, to apologize, and start dating.Some men think that they need some encouragement, just look around you.

You may have gone through a period apart already, that is lust, an almost uncontrollable urge to reunite.It`s a terrible stereotype, but it is profoundly difficult for her and when he is online.You are not desperate and miserable losing your partner back can seem like a date.I am the guy who pulls out chairs or open doors for her back, you will be quick to answer that question.With all the 3 tips I am so ashamed at what I should DO something - I needed to get back an ex.

I Got My Ex Back With Law Of Attraction

[wang-yeon]

Chewing gum (Park Jimin X reader)

Warning: cursing, sexual themes, smut I guess, raunchy language, mentions of alcohol, slight mention of drugs but not really, fluffy fluff

Summary: y/n has enough piled on her plate being a full time college student and began a virgin is added to the list. In seek to ridden her purity  she attempts to find the right guy. Little does she know that the right guy is more interested in something else rather than her purity.

college is a stressful time for any young adult struggling with their inner bullshit. Each day you are faced with a new face on campus. A new story. Friendships bond over simple conversations that start from  inconsequential talk to a mind bending relationship. Just the simple thought is to send anyone into over drive. The simple crave to have a relationship was enough to impassion or have great value to someone resulting in a great impact in there lives. enough to last a life time.

Out of all the faces in the crowd that including mine, I was the only sad bastard that desired this feeling while everyone else establish it without minding a blink. If only they knew how lucky they truly were to have a lucky someone. It doesn't even have to be someone, anyone. Sometimes we just need anyone. It doesn't matter who it is. Just anyone to remind us what's it like to live in the moment, and feel something before its over completely.

Sure I did have that one person that attempted to pursue these unrealistic goals. His name was Jeon Jungkook , but he often went by the name of Jungcock. I remember that specific moment he tried to be that anyone, making me live in the moment but very poorly.

I had came to the conclusion that it was a brilliant idea to lose my virginity the night me and jungkook had attended a forced religious study brought to you by my ever so 'loving' parents. This making it the perfect setting to fuck, sorry to put it bluntly but these were the thoughts that once surfaced my sick teenage brain. Of course the mood hadn't been set, while I was completely ignoring it jungkook was soaking in the awkwardness.

Many attempts later trying to get jungkook off he finally lets out a cry, which I totally took the wrong way. Thinking it was a cry from pleasure I began jerking him off faster making his face  contort into a painful expression. I evidently got the hint once he busted out into tears. I had planned the night out to the brim but what I didn't imagine was to have a crying jungkook, patting him awkwardly as he poured out his gay fantasies.

Safe to say ever since that night I had reminded a virgin. Which isn't wrong I just didn't want to live this depriving life anymore. yes there was always porn but that never works out for me. see before the porn even started I would already find myself turned on, just like any horny virgin stuck in college.

As soon as I would click on the 'adult entertainment' the plot beings instantly killing my lady boner. it doesn't add up to me, I come on the site for one thing to simple pleasure myself by seeing a 7-10 minute film filled with satisfying moans but instead I'm faced with a full on movie with a real plot as if they are gonna win a Oscar.

I had been convinced that my vagina had been broken. so I hide myself from the world. Surviving from ramen noodles and red bulls I was all set. I was to afraid that the world would perceive me differently because of this. People would often use my virginity to their advantage, seeing my purity as a prize. My only source being able to hide. until my roommate told me other wise. she had brought up how I wasn't being social that being one of the reasons my vagina had magically stopped working. It just gave up.

My vagina wants convinced no one wanted it because it was untouched and pure. Like a flower, if that flower was all fucked up suffering from her dumbass roommate.     

Hours passed as she attempted to revamp my whole being. almost to the point of looking like a stripper. not to insult the strippers out there, I'm sure your definitely doing better off then me. the only reason why I decided to try and go to this party was not because of my new found appearance or because my roommates boyfriend namjoon would be getting the alcohol but because I was simply promised food.

nothing more nothing less.

there wasn't even food.

nothing but alcohol.

My roommate had left me by the time we got through the door leaving me to awkwardly pretend like I'm having an intimate fake conversation on the phone. "whos the lucky guy?" my attention was cut sort as I turned around being faced with a cheeky brunette who I must say had an award winning smile. His face was sure enough to kick start my broken vagina

(I am so sorry, I wrote this at 2am and I am now realizing what the fuck is wrong with me)

"the guy on the phone, or is it a girl. It is the 21st century and all." the overly handsome boy said pointing to my phone.

He must had heard the conversation between me and...well nobody sensing I had no one to talk to besides myself.

"Oh it was nobody." I say waving him off a with a slight smile, one that couldn't compete to his. it was weird that I was feeling such fondness to someone I haven't properly met, but damn was he good to look at.

"Oh well if it was nobody then I guess they wouldn't mind if I introduced myself." I never nodded my head as fast I did  in that moment, I swear I almost broke my neck. I was still in the process of trying to figure out what he wanted to do with me. if only he knew what lied beneath all this stripper exterior. again no disrespect to strippers.

"My name is park jimin, but you can just call me jimin I don't mind. what about you? a beautiful girl like you must have a name."

He had me wrapped around his finger

"Oh my names Y/N, you can call me Y/N noting special I'm sorry." I played off my awkwardness with a quick deprived laugh.

"woah."

"what?" I began to panic searching my face for any minor detail on my face as his small statement worried me.

"Oh nothing, its just I cant believe someone as perfect as you could also share the name of a goddess." Jimin held a sweet exterior and I wanted nothing more than to see what he could actually be capable of when he gets the upper hand. it took everything in me to not rip his clothes off.

a small tug on my dress brought me out of my 'I need to fuck jimin' phase, as I turned around a complete bored expression painted my face. my roommate had come in at the most imperfect time. she had been the one to come up with the idea to get my broken vagina back in the works. I haven't even seen her this entire party and she pops up now. this must mean that I wasn't meant to have sex with jimin.

ha lets be honest I'm still gonna have sex with jimin.

but before I could take any sort of action my oh so lovely roommate decided to tug me off with her to a beer pong table. Jimin still sported his loving smile while I was being tugged away but soon deflated as I grew further away. well looks like I lost the only chance of sex tonight. I was placed at the head of the table, the horizon filled with seas of solo red cups with what I assumed were filled with beer.a happy roommate by my side wishing I could share the same expression but remained the unamused expression. That was until I found out who we were playing against.

"Hey jimin get over here, I cant lose to my girlfriend and her roommate." my head immediately shot up at namjoons mention of jimin. my head fully coming up from its previous stances as I face jimin.

He flashes me a smirk and bites his lips as he made eye contact with me. I noticed that he had gained more confidence due to his kill worthy actions and as I look over at the cups in my view and cant help but eagerly wonder how much more confidence jimin can gain by the simple sip of a cup. or two. the couple of rounds were spent by many laughs and the splashes of the ball hitting the intoxicating beer. as the rounds went on we saw the game as nothing but a blur enjoining each others company.

namjoon and roommate had been all over each other while me and jimin oh so subtlety flirted and shared affectionate glances. these actions were enough to send me into over drive.

I began to completely forget about the game as the sound of the ball hitting the rim clinked in my ears every chance I got. jimin retrieved the ball before sparing me a glance.

"This shot goes out to my lucky lady!" Jimin said clearly intoxicated but so was everyone at that party including myself. he still managed to make my heart swell even in his drunken oblivion.

"Go ahead kiss the ball baby, your my little good luck charm." jimin said shoving the ball in my face.

This situation already was weird by his choice of words but grew weirder as he shoved the ball in my face. none of the less I kissed the ball still remaining eye contact with him which he found oddly sexy.

"Maybe one on the lips for extra good luck." Oh park jimin was gonna be the death of me. I had to be a complete idiot to deny this. I placed my arms around his neck as he placed his around my waist. our lips were centimenairs apart, thesecual tensions driving us to close the gap.

"Hey don't give him all of your luck, we don't want them to win!" my roommate said as she proceeded to pull me and jimin apart. we both let out a loud sigh going back in our previous position. remind me to get a new roommate. eventfully jimin made the cup earning a satisfying splashing victory fill his teams ears.

I quickly reached for the cup noticing it being different from the cups, it being marked as 'the krusty krab secret formula'. Of course I drank it but as everyones face twisted into a scared expression I went quiet.

"Woah, whats wrong with you guys?"

"Joon, she took the special one...The dru-"

"I fucking know, cant you see me freaking out. maybe she'll be okay."

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN SHELL BE OKAY?! She just took a few grams of-"

"Lets go to the pool!"

Those had to be the most awkward moments for me. I stood there silently observing as namjoon and roommate attempted to have a quiet conversation about something I couldn't catch on to. I could tell jimin was just as confused as I was, but couldn't really focus on anything as I began to see pretty shapes and colors I could distinguish.

I somehow managed to make my way to the pool, in a very unstable fashion do to the liquids in my system. Everyone in the pool had took the liberty to swim in their underwear, so I followed along.

I felt a small tap on my shoulders turning around being faced with a the shit eating smirk that was painted on his face ever since the alcohol began lurking in his system. this was certainly a good thing as it was directing us to have a more direct conversation rather than sober.

"I thought I lost you for a second, couldn't lose someone as beautiful as you." To jimin he may have been saying the most simplest of things to me it was as if he was reciting a poem deep from his heart. For all I know he probably says this to countless amount of girls, what made me so special?

I quickly covered it up with a laugh and splashing water in his face which wasn't the best idea. The water had gotten trapped in his hair causing the once straight hair to become wet and stick to his forehead. Making him grow hotter.

Jimin responded by grabbing me by the waist and placing me on his shoulder, letting a yelp fall from my mouth.

"Jimin let me down." I protested but secretly knew that I didn't want him to let go. "Alright." Jimin obliged as he let go of me, a loud splash filled the atmosphere as both our bodies fell underneath the pools surface. I closed my eyes attempting to reach the surface of the pool before feeling a body collide with mine. I quickly came up to the surface with a dazed expression as my arms were locked around jimins neck and his on my waist.

It was sure enough to shock the both of us being in that position but was it a bad thing. "Look at that, I think I saved your life."

"I think you deserve an award due to such braver." I knew that my comment was risky but my actions were enough to diagnose me as borderline crazy. I had managed to easily wrap my legs around jimins waist bringing us at a closer proximity.

"Oh? I was hopping for just a kiss." Of course he was. Jimin didn't want me. He was far better then any of the guys I had ever thought of losing my virginity to. I took my legs off from around him. Looks like I was shit out of luck.

"I mean it certainly isn't a bad thing. I'm sure every part of you looks good...taste good." Jimin said seductively licking his lips as he brought my legs back around his waist. My cheeks began to flame a crimson color at his statement.

"Is this what you say to all of your girls?"

"I'm flattered that you think I have girls lined up but when will you notice it's only you. Your so beautiful. Every aspect of you. Your personality. Your beautiful body. Your perfect baby." Jimin finished his heartfelt sentence with a firm squeeze on my ass making it the icing on the cake.

I carefully brought my lips to his needing the feel of our lips together. The kiss started off slow almost as afraid it would end at any moment but as it progressed we began to become intoxicated by he kiss. The alcohol already consuming our system has added to the ecstasy flowing through as intensifying the feeling. Jimin backed slowly to the pool wall his hands beginning to wander to my core. My stomach tightened at his gesture letting a low moan fall from my lips. Encouraging his confidence.

"I wanna feel you baby, is that okay?" I nodded eagerly as his hands guided his way to my heat. His hands began to circle around my clit as he began kissing my neck leaving his love bites. Truth be told was I never had an orgasm, well no guy had ever gave me an organism. It was usually always my sex deprived self left alone to take care of my business making this a completely different experience. It had gotten so intense to the point that I couldn't control my moans. Jimin attempted to silence them with his lips only making me crave the moment even more. 

He began to tease my opening, the euphoria coming in contact with my body once again. I couldn't take it anymore the feeling of the euphoria running through my body sending it into overdrive. I quickly grabbed jimins hands signaling him to stop. After all the setting we were in was a pool. Surrounded by people. Clearly Jimin couldn't help it. Somehow he did manage to extract his hands from my heat.

"Sorry, you were just so wet I couldn't help myself." It's like he wanted to take me right then and there which I would have obliged to but due to the scene sadly the circumstances couldn't have been the same.

"Jimin, it's like your trying to kill me!" I said hitting Jimin lightly on the arm embarrassed by his abrupt statement. Jimin thought nothing of it as he smiled into my neck giggling lightly.

"Don't hide your smile, it makes me insides melt." maybe the alcohol lurking in my system wasn't as good as his. I couldn't stop the flow of words leaving my mouth. each coming out after the next, each word more dirtier than the next. Even though jimin had the chance to swim away from me he didn't, choosing to stay. I had came to the conclusion that he was absoultuly insane, lucky for him I am to. obviously.

"Well I have to say seeing you in such minimal clothing really makes me want me take you here right now." Jimin said going along with conversation but his dirty talk was far better than mine, it also having a greater affect.

"And seeing you in this pool,water all over your body. Oh baby I'm sure you can be wetter than this." By this point I was dripping and ready for my virginity to be gracefully taken by park jimin.

We had managed to stumble up the steps with drunken kisses in  search of the nearest bedroom in need to relieve the tension. Panic began to roll through my body as we entered the room, jimin quickly closing the door pushing me into the wall where he continued to kiss me. His hands soon diverted to the inside of my thighs growing closer to my heat. This simple action caused a loud moan to escape from my lips surprising jimin before a dark expression rolled over his face.

Jimin quickly picked me up placing me on the bed where he got in between my thighs ever so slightly and gently grinding against my core. At an agonizing rate. I wanted more lifting my hips meeting his thrusting making him let a deep groan but silencing it as his lips connected to my neck, me responding constantly to each mark he made.

"Hey can we try something?" I said in a quiet voice, not trusting myself to speak to loud afraid I would let out a loud moan. Jimin nodded his head but still continued his journey on leaving soft purple marks on my neck.  I pushed him back a little before taking my shirt off causing jimins heart to quicken and his eyes to widen.

"Um may...May touch..Your um." I laughed at the new jimin before me. One who was stuttering due to nervousness. It was as if the confidence drained from him as I gided his hands to my clothed boobs. it was cute to see him venerable. His hands remained stiff before he squeezed them slightly making a quiet moan leave my lips.

 This obviously encouraging him he continued his actions before I reached to updo my bra to which he stopped me. "Hey its okay, we don't have to do any drastic."

"Oh, um okay." I took my hand away from my bra straps bringing them to my side.

I had never gone this far with a guy and when I almost had they were never as indering as jimin was. I looked over his features before placing his face in my hands connecting our lips together. I climbed on his lap enjoying the sounds falling from his lips and I'm sure he felt the same as for me. I slowly grinded my hips feeling his member poke my thigh.

I proceeded to take off his shirt feeling over his muscles liking the skin to skin contact.  our tonuges began to battle for dominance, I gided my ran to his member causing me to win the battle.  I quickly reached for his zipper bringing it down before he stopped me.

"Hey calm down, we don't have to go this fast. We don't even have to have sex if you want to?" It cared that he worried about me and my thoughts but in reality I wanted nothing more but to fuck him and finally be ridden rom my virginity. "sorry I'm just really nervous."

"hey its okay like I said we don't have to do anything, I still think your a cool girl." a cool girl? I wanted be so much more than a cool girl, but I didn't protest instead just silently accepting.

"Yeah, we can still hang out, without doing anything major."

"Yeah, I would love to keep on talking to the beautiful girl I met tonight. Well I guess I should take you home." And just like that my virginity dreams were crushed. 

jimin had managed to drive me back to my dorm room with the help of making sure I was in the right state of mind. I invited him into the dorm with open arms as he excepted it insisting he needed to nurse me back to health. aka he wanted to have sex with me. at least I think I sat fidgeting on my bed as jimin retrieved some water for me, and then proceeding to sit on the bed with me crossing his fingers. as we both sat in silence.

filling the air with tension.

"I'm sorry." I say as my lips quivered realizing my idiotic behavior that occurred throughout the night.

"Oh baby you don't need to be sorry, sure the night didn't go as we planned but one thing for sure is that I met a beautiful girl through it."

Their he goes again saying romantic things making my heart swoon. why did he have to be so perfect. to perfect. someone I couldn't get no matter how hard I longed for.

"Oh please, I'm not beautiful. sure with the makeup I look descent but besides that, I look identical to a trashcan." Jimin had a bored expression playing on his face as these words left my mouth not beliving a word that flowed from my mouth.

"Okay you want me to be honest? You remind me of a flower, a flower that is anything but beautiful and worthy, at least that's what people may think. but when you bloom and open up to the people around you that's when your beauty shows. You need to open up to people more instead of opening your legs to get to the source, because that doesn't matter like your personality ."

Sure the beginning of the sentence didn't begin off oh so glamorous but it was the message that he proclaimed that caused his statement to come off sincere. In that moment I realized that I was looking for something when something else had already found me. what I'm trying to say is that I was seeking to lose my virginity something that means a lot to a person, that's all I was focused on.

While jimin was focused on the likeability, he didn't care about my sex appeal just about my heart. That's all he was seeking  for, just someone he could care for. He found me. I was to naïve to realize it. I was lost in my head. He was lost in his heart. He wasn't as lost as I was, I was far beyond lost that I couldn't make sense of it or why it was meant for me but yet I began to be drawn to it all. 

Now as we lay in my bed mindlessly kissing Id like to think after all the tragic events that occurred that somehow he feels the same. So perhaps being connected to someone and not in a sexual  derogatory manor but rather as a close relationship. This being something I had craved all along. The need to need someone, anyone.

Jimins hands carefully holding my waist making me feel like I am as fragile and delicate as a doll. His care makes me feel as if I was his main priority. Its crazy after one night how quick a connection can occur between two people. weather it be a friendship or sexual encounter.

I had thought about what the world thinks of me. My appearance. my personality. My virginity. every aspect of me. I have thought about this for so long that some parts of me have changed to fit the life of others I achieved to once be. I can see now that virginity has nothing to do with these aspects.Just some sorry excuses i used, blocking out the real problem. I longed for a human connection.

His soft snores filled my ears his arms wrapping tighter around me as if he's afraid that ill leave. I had someone who cares about me and shows open affection, and if at least one person can see my true self/ beauty instead of seeing my virginity as a title. then I can have the will power to show my true self and actually open up to the people I care for the most.

A/n I wanted to post this story sometime sooner but turns out a special person was giving birth and I had to go witnesses it and I saw EVERYTHING but I manage to finish the writing while she gave birth. also I'm thinking about a part two

[allfortheloveofwandering-blog]

The first two weeks of classes were a little bit on the sulit (difficult) side for me, but this past week as been so much more enjoyable.  Classes are still a lot of work, and the schedule is a bit harrowing, but since I began feeling better and felt more able to settle into this new routine, I have felt my spirits lift, and this week has floated by with the same happy buoyancy.

Yes, this actually happened.  

Classes have continued to be both challenging and interesting.  We spent a fair amount of time this week on various tata bahasa (grammar) that by this point I sort of know how to use instinctively, because they are necessary in both formal and informal, but never fully understood.  It was fun to have a fuller list of them than just what I knew from my own limited vocabulary, and one of my lovely teachers is going to help me develop an even fuller list of one which piqued my interest because I have a working theory that something quite phonologically interesting is going on with that daftar kata-kata (list of words).  (I can’t tell you how thankful I am that they are so tolerant of my endless questions that are very clearly not motivated by pure language learning, but rather my fascination with all the fun linguistic things that happen in Bahasa Indonesia.)

Trying my hand at batik.

This week not only did I continue with my menari (dance) elective class, but my batik elective class finally began as well!  I have a mild obsession with the many wonderful kain (fabrics) of Indonesia, as anyone who has seen my wardrobe knows, and batik is definitely one of my favorites.  I have wanted to learn how to make it for years now, and finally, through CLS, I get my chance to try my hand at it!  We spent the first class tracing over a pre-drawn traditional motif with malam (“wax” or “paraffin,” but also the word for night, which I really like), using a canting, a traditional too used for applying the wax to the fabric.  It was certainly challenging; there is actually a tradition of saying that women who make batik make the best istri (wives), because they have to be so sabar (patient).  I had a lot of fun joking about this throughout class, and I was also pleased to see that I was beginning to get the knack of batik by the end of our first session.  We will add color to our fabric next week, and I cannot wait!

Dog cafe!  

Because I was no longer rushing home every day to rest away my illness, I was able to have some fun with my tutor time as well.  We went to several cafes together, including a dog café, which was possibly the most enjoyable place I have ever mengerjakan P.R. (done my H.W.—P.R. is short for pekerjaan rumah, or literally home work).

Considering I haven’t painted since early high school… I’ll take it!   

We took another class trip this week, this time to Batu, a small neighboring city that is famous for it’s agritourism.  We got to explore kebun jambu (guava orchards), memetik jeruk (pick oranges), and eat raw sayur-sayuran (vegetables), a rare treat in a country where most vegetables are stir fried or boiled.  Following our morning at the orchards and adjacent farm, we visited a local artist whose paintings act as criticism of the interaction between the “modern” era and traditional practices, influence from foreign powers, among other topics.  The paintings were compelling, and I wish more people had a chance to see them.  After touring his studio, the artist, Pak Slamat, provided us with some painting supplies and canvases, and we spent the afternoon working on our own lukisan-lukisan (paintings).  I won’t say that mine was genius, but it was still a really enjoyable afternoon.  After lunch all of the classes visted Coban Rondo, a beautiful waterfall I have actually had the privilege of visiting once before.  One of our assignments over the weekend was to make a vlog about our time in Batu, and you can watch it here.  (It’s all in Bahasa Indonesia, and I did not subtitle it, but I feel like it’s still fun to watch.  Plus you get to meet Mbak Lo, one of the people in my class, and she’s awesome!)

In many ways CLS feels like a language-learning summer camp, complete with games and weekend trips.  It sometimes feels a bit strange to be in Indonesia and not working at an actual job, as that is what I have always done before, but I have decided that maybe my best approach to these next few weeks is to embrace all of this.  Of course, this is not to say that I am not working hard as well (those many hours of P.R. each night are not to be laughed at), but I am overjoyed that learning Indonesian, something that I always had to work into an already packed schedule, is my only real task here, and the various outings and cultural classes are simply wonderful.  I’m channeling my inner Mary Poppins, finding the fun, and loving my time with CLS thus far.

  Food of the Week: Rujak.  Rujak is a type of food served with a sauce that is both spicy and sweet (a combination I wish America did more of).  There are many different versions, but my favorite is the fruit version, which we were served while we were in Batu this weekend.  The fresh fruit, the spicy and sweet sauce… it was all perfect.

  Word of the Week: Bekas Pacar.  I would promise that not all of my words of the week will be related to dating, but as these seem to always be the most amusing words, I’m going to aim towards not making a pembohong (liar) of myself.  But earlier this week we learned the word bekas, which means “leftovers.”  (If you are wondering why I never learned this in the three years I lived in Indonesia, it is clearly because you have never been fed by an Indonesian mother.)  Our guru-guru (teachers) did not hesitate to inform us that another, less-polite way of referring to your mantan (ex) is bekas pacar, or “boyfriend/girlfriend leftovers.”  We’ve been having fun with this phrase ever since.

  Murid-muridku!  

Person(s) of the Week:  Murid-muridku.  (My students.)  As I was headed to buy batik with some of my fellow mahasiswa CLS the other day, I heard someone call out “Miss Grace!”  Much to my surprise, I had run into a group of my past students from Gorontalo!  While I anticipate being able to see some of my students from Malang when I have time a bit later, I never imagined I would be able to meet up with my students from Gorontalo, as it is so far away.  But it turns out several of them are kulia (going to university) in Malang.  We have plans to see one another in the next few weeks, and I could not be more excited.

  CLS Week 4: Finding the Fun in Language Learning The first two weeks of classes were a little bit on the sulit (difficult) side for me, but this past week as been so much more enjoyable. 

[adambstingus]

6 Guys Youll End Up Dating When Youve Been Single For Too Long

I’m writing this post from my bed.

I’m un-showered, even though I came home from CrossFit three hours ago.

I’m slugging back red wine and crushing a party size-serving of chips and salsa.

I turned my phone on silent an hour ago, just so I would stop checking to see if the guy I like has responded to the text I sent earlier.

Needless to say, I dont think you get much more single than this.

There are nights when I rejoice in it, and there are nights when I sulk in it.

Tonight, its the latter.

But as I sit here, elbow-deep in a bag of Tostitos and knuckles clenched around a topped-off glass of wine, I cant help but be grateful for this single life Ive been living for almost a year now.

Its an unexpected and for me unwanted learning experience.

I say its “unwanted” because Im the relationship type.

Ive never had a one-night stand (nor will I ever).

I like commitment.

Dating gives me anxiety because I never know what to say or do.

Should I text him first? Will he text me?

Whats the right emoji to use? Should I even use an emoji?

Let me screenshot this and send it to all my friends to see if its okay.

What should I wear?

Unwanted or not, Im on one hell of a self-learning curve.

I think its so important for every woman to have this bittersweet journey, especially in her20s.

Im learning when to keep my guard up and when to let it come crashing down.

Im learning how to be patient.

I’m learning what I like and what I dont.

Im learning so much about myself because Im finding time for myself.

Im trying new things.

I’ve joined CrossFit and hot yoga, and I quit some unhealthy habits that were crippling my self-esteem.

Ive tried tons of new restaurants completely free, thanks to first dates.

But besides learning about myself, Im learning a lot about the dating pool.

Let me tell you this: When they say there are plenty of fish in the sea, it’s true.

But the ones you want to catch are really, really hard to find. They’re borderline nonexistent.

Ive met tons of guys ranging in age, profession, personality, height, hobbies, etc.

However, after dozens and dozens of dates and hundreds of right swipes that have amounted to nothing, Ive been able to put a label on just about every single one.

Ive boiled them down to six main categories:

1. The Ex

When one relationship ends, its so easy to look back at a previous ex and question why that relationship didnt work out either.

Call it delusion or curiosity, but it always seems like a logical first step when youre single.

So, if youre both single, why not give it another whirl?

Its comfortable. Its fun.

Its your opportunity to double-check hes really not the one who got away.

When my high school sweetheart found out that my recent ex and I had ended things, he came back into my life the same way he left it: like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.

Without getting into details for his sake (and his girlfriends, whoops), the verdict was we broke up for a reason.

Thats always a validating feeling.

In the words of my inner spirit animal, Taylor Swift, we are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

But hey, like I said, it cant hurt to double check.

2. The Non-Committal Charmer

Hell tell you youre exclusive, but he won’t ever make you his girlfriend.

He’ll monopolize your free time to ensure you dont spend time with anyone else, but he wont commit.

Youll never meet his friends or family, so dont even try.

He is in complete control of the relationship because you let him be.

His charm, wit and personality compel you to stay.

His goal is to perpetually keep your relationship in a hostage situation.

You want to see other people, but you dont want to put what you have at risk because its comfortable and fun.

Youre convinced that at some point, hell come to his senses.

He wont.

So, youre going to want to quit while you’re ahead. Dont waste any time.

3. The Egotistical PrickWho Plays On Your Heartstrings

Is it rough to call these people sociopaths?

Theyll do everything they can to make you like them in a short period of time.

Theyll cook you your favorite dinner, buy you nice wine and compliment you on the weird things you wish people would notice.

They make it so easy to let your guard down.

Then, one day, theyll just stop talking to you.

Theyll give you some bullsh*t excuse like theyre just “not ready for a relationship right now, or they really like you, and “it scares” them.

No, you just needed an ego trip. Or, you needed to get laid.

Or both.Whatever.

These types of guys are the reason all women are a little hesitant, confused, broken and yes crazy.

There are plenty of them out there.

4. The Former Frat Guy Who Just Cant Let Go Of College

In my opinion, these guys are the absolute worst.

This is mainly because they dont even realize theyre being the absolute worst. The naivety isnt at all charming.

He doesnt have to be a frat guy. Hes just the guy who loves college.

He cant grow up.

He loves his boys and beer pong more than he loves his job. He knows more about chugging beers than investing in a 401(k).

He has no idea how to start or maintain a conversation. His career path is questionable.

He most likely has the life goal of being a stay-at-home dad.

Thats what she said jokes are far too common, and he finds them far too funny.

While I personally havent gone on a single date with one of these guys, they exist in the masses.

So good luck, female young professionalsof America who thought men matured after college.

AsI say to my dad, “Im looking for the smartest idiot over 25.”

5. The One Youre Just Not That Into

These, for me, are the most common.

Then again, I think they’re common for everyone.

If we were into every person we met, there wouldnt be anyone special, right?

But sometimes, you really want to like someone.

He hasa great job. You love hisfriends and family. He’s funny.

You have everything in common. You can text all day and never run out of things to talk about.

Your Snapchat exchanges keep you laughing all day long.

He’s proud of you. He cares about you.

Youre even a perfect match (according to the stars).

But, you just arent into this person, no matter how hard you try to be.

While relationships take effort, you should never force yourself to fall for someone because you think you’d be great together.

It’s a recipe for disaster and heartbreak, and that’s one sad situationI won’t ever willingly walk into.

So when you find yourself in this kind of mess, you have to break the ice.

It’s unfair to string the other person along when he’s clearly feeling all the emotions you wish you could.

When you’re dating someone youre not into, but whom you love as a human being, breaking the ice is a double-edged sword.

You both end up hurt and bummed.

6.The One

Every person I talk to tells me the one will walk into my life when I least expect it.

It wont be because I spent my entire lunch break swiping left and right (mostly left).

It wont be because I asked my co-workers, friends, family and acquaintances if they know someone else whos completely exhausted by the routine dating scene.

It certainly wont be because I got drunk enough to get the nerve to walk up to a guy and strike up a random conversation.

No way, not me.

Im told Ill meet someone in a sweet form of serendipity.

Ill accidentally spill my coffee on him at Starbucks.

Well bond over the fresh produce at Trader Joes.

Well be at the same bar for happy hour.

Something will happen.

When that something does, in fact, happen, all those heartbreaks, mistakes, moments of weakness and feelings of guilt will wash away.

You won’t question whether your guard should be up or down. What or when to text won’t be a thought.

Everything will slip into place.

Because as everyone always says, “When you know, you know.”

So until then, my advice to every single woman out there is this: Be a lady.

Be fearless, but not careless.

Be willing to love and unafraid to get hurt.

Put yourself out there. Learn to love yourself.

Discover hobbies that fill your time.

But this is the most important piece of advice of all: Never ever settle for any of the five who come before “the one.”

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/165810005762

[samanthasroberts]

6 Guys Youll End Up Dating When Youve Been Single For Too Long

I’m writing this post from my bed.

I’m un-showered, even though I came home from CrossFit three hours ago.

I’m slugging back red wine and crushing a party size-serving of chips and salsa.

I turned my phone on silent an hour ago, just so I would stop checking to see if the guy I like has responded to the text I sent earlier.

Needless to say, I dont think you get much more single than this.

There are nights when I rejoice in it, and there are nights when I sulk in it.

Tonight, its the latter.

But as I sit here, elbow-deep in a bag of Tostitos and knuckles clenched around a topped-off glass of wine, I cant help but be grateful for this single life Ive been living for almost a year now.

Its an unexpected and for me unwanted learning experience.

I say its “unwanted” because Im the relationship type.

Ive never had a one-night stand (nor will I ever).

I like commitment.

Dating gives me anxiety because I never know what to say or do.

Should I text him first? Will he text me?

Whats the right emoji to use? Should I even use an emoji?

Let me screenshot this and send it to all my friends to see if its okay.

What should I wear?

Unwanted or not, Im on one hell of a self-learning curve.

I think its so important for every woman to have this bittersweet journey, especially in her20s.

Im learning when to keep my guard up and when to let it come crashing down.

Im learning how to be patient.

I’m learning what I like and what I dont.

Im learning so much about myself because Im finding time for myself.

Im trying new things.

I’ve joined CrossFit and hot yoga, and I quit some unhealthy habits that were crippling my self-esteem.

Ive tried tons of new restaurants completely free, thanks to first dates.

But besides learning about myself, Im learning a lot about the dating pool.

Let me tell you this: When they say there are plenty of fish in the sea, it’s true.

But the ones you want to catch are really, really hard to find. They’re borderline nonexistent.

Ive met tons of guys ranging in age, profession, personality, height, hobbies, etc.

However, after dozens and dozens of dates and hundreds of right swipes that have amounted to nothing, Ive been able to put a label on just about every single one.

Ive boiled them down to six main categories:

1. The Ex

When one relationship ends, its so easy to look back at a previous ex and question why that relationship didnt work out either.

Call it delusion or curiosity, but it always seems like a logical first step when youre single.

So, if youre both single, why not give it another whirl?

Its comfortable. Its fun.

Its your opportunity to double-check hes really not the one who got away.

When my high school sweetheart found out that my recent ex and I had ended things, he came back into my life the same way he left it: like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.

Without getting into details for his sake (and his girlfriends, whoops), the verdict was we broke up for a reason.

Thats always a validating feeling.

In the words of my inner spirit animal, Taylor Swift, we are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

But hey, like I said, it cant hurt to double check.

2. The Non-Committal Charmer

Hell tell you youre exclusive, but he won’t ever make you his girlfriend.

He’ll monopolize your free time to ensure you dont spend time with anyone else, but he wont commit.

Youll never meet his friends or family, so dont even try.

He is in complete control of the relationship because you let him be.

His charm, wit and personality compel you to stay.

His goal is to perpetually keep your relationship in a hostage situation.

You want to see other people, but you dont want to put what you have at risk because its comfortable and fun.

Youre convinced that at some point, hell come to his senses.

He wont.

So, youre going to want to quit while you’re ahead. Dont waste any time.

3. The Egotistical PrickWho Plays On Your Heartstrings

Is it rough to call these people sociopaths?

Theyll do everything they can to make you like them in a short period of time.

Theyll cook you your favorite dinner, buy you nice wine and compliment you on the weird things you wish people would notice.

They make it so easy to let your guard down.

Then, one day, theyll just stop talking to you.

Theyll give you some bullsh*t excuse like theyre just “not ready for a relationship right now, or they really like you, and “it scares” them.

No, you just needed an ego trip. Or, you needed to get laid.

Or both.Whatever.

These types of guys are the reason all women are a little hesitant, confused, broken and yes crazy.

There are plenty of them out there.

4. The Former Frat Guy Who Just Cant Let Go Of College

In my opinion, these guys are the absolute worst.

This is mainly because they dont even realize theyre being the absolute worst. The naivety isnt at all charming.

He doesnt have to be a frat guy. Hes just the guy who loves college.

He cant grow up.

He loves his boys and beer pong more than he loves his job. He knows more about chugging beers than investing in a 401(k).

He has no idea how to start or maintain a conversation. His career path is questionable.

He most likely has the life goal of being a stay-at-home dad.

Thats what she said jokes are far too common, and he finds them far too funny.

While I personally havent gone on a single date with one of these guys, they exist in the masses.

So good luck, female young professionalsof America who thought men matured after college.

AsI say to my dad, “Im looking for the smartest idiot over 25.”

5. The One Youre Just Not That Into

These, for me, are the most common.

Then again, I think they’re common for everyone.

If we were into every person we met, there wouldnt be anyone special, right?

But sometimes, you really want to like someone.

He hasa great job. You love hisfriends and family. He’s funny.

You have everything in common. You can text all day and never run out of things to talk about.

Your Snapchat exchanges keep you laughing all day long.

He’s proud of you. He cares about you.

Youre even a perfect match (according to the stars).

But, you just arent into this person, no matter how hard you try to be.

While relationships take effort, you should never force yourself to fall for someone because you think you’d be great together.

It’s a recipe for disaster and heartbreak, and that’s one sad situationI won’t ever willingly walk into.

So when you find yourself in this kind of mess, you have to break the ice.

It’s unfair to string the other person along when he’s clearly feeling all the emotions you wish you could.

When you’re dating someone youre not into, but whom you love as a human being, breaking the ice is a double-edged sword.

You both end up hurt and bummed.

6.The One

Every person I talk to tells me the one will walk into my life when I least expect it.

It wont be because I spent my entire lunch break swiping left and right (mostly left).

It wont be because I asked my co-workers, friends, family and acquaintances if they know someone else whos completely exhausted by the routine dating scene.

It certainly wont be because I got drunk enough to get the nerve to walk up to a guy and strike up a random conversation.

No way, not me.

Im told Ill meet someone in a sweet form of serendipity.

Ill accidentally spill my coffee on him at Starbucks.

Well bond over the fresh produce at Trader Joes.

Well be at the same bar for happy hour.

Something will happen.

When that something does, in fact, happen, all those heartbreaks, mistakes, moments of weakness and feelings of guilt will wash away.

You won’t question whether your guard should be up or down. What or when to text won’t be a thought.

Everything will slip into place.

Because as everyone always says, “When you know, you know.”

So until then, my advice to every single woman out there is this: Be a lady.

Be fearless, but not careless.

Be willing to love and unafraid to get hurt.

Put yourself out there. Learn to love yourself.

Discover hobbies that fill your time.

But this is the most important piece of advice of all: Never ever settle for any of the five who come before “the one.”

Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/

[jimdsmith34]

6 Guys Youll End Up Dating When Youve Been Single For Too Long

I’m writing this post from my bed.

I’m un-showered, even though I came home from CrossFit three hours ago.

I’m slugging back red wine and crushing a party size-serving of chips and salsa.

I turned my phone on silent an hour ago, just so I would stop checking to see if the guy I like has responded to the text I sent earlier.

Needless to say, I dont think you get much more single than this.

There are nights when I rejoice in it, and there are nights when I sulk in it.

Tonight, its the latter.

But as I sit here, elbow-deep in a bag of Tostitos and knuckles clenched around a topped-off glass of wine, I cant help but be grateful for this single life Ive been living for almost a year now.

Its an unexpected and for me unwanted learning experience.

I say its “unwanted” because Im the relationship type.

Ive never had a one-night stand (nor will I ever).

I like commitment.

Dating gives me anxiety because I never know what to say or do.

Should I text him first? Will he text me?

Whats the right emoji to use? Should I even use an emoji?

Let me screenshot this and send it to all my friends to see if its okay.

What should I wear?

Unwanted or not, Im on one hell of a self-learning curve.

I think its so important for every woman to have this bittersweet journey, especially in her20s.

Im learning when to keep my guard up and when to let it come crashing down.

Im learning how to be patient.

I’m learning what I like and what I dont.

Im learning so much about myself because Im finding time for myself.

Im trying new things.

I’ve joined CrossFit and hot yoga, and I quit some unhealthy habits that were crippling my self-esteem.

Ive tried tons of new restaurants completely free, thanks to first dates.

But besides learning about myself, Im learning a lot about the dating pool.

Let me tell you this: When they say there are plenty of fish in the sea, it’s true.

But the ones you want to catch are really, really hard to find. They’re borderline nonexistent.

Ive met tons of guys ranging in age, profession, personality, height, hobbies, etc.

However, after dozens and dozens of dates and hundreds of right swipes that have amounted to nothing, Ive been able to put a label on just about every single one.

Ive boiled them down to six main categories:

1. The Ex

When one relationship ends, its so easy to look back at a previous ex and question why that relationship didnt work out either.

Call it delusion or curiosity, but it always seems like a logical first step when youre single.

So, if youre both single, why not give it another whirl?

Its comfortable. Its fun.

Its your opportunity to double-check hes really not the one who got away.

When my high school sweetheart found out that my recent ex and I had ended things, he came back into my life the same way he left it: like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.

Without getting into details for his sake (and his girlfriends, whoops), the verdict was we broke up for a reason.

Thats always a validating feeling.

In the words of my inner spirit animal, Taylor Swift, we are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

But hey, like I said, it cant hurt to double check.

2. The Non-Committal Charmer

Hell tell you youre exclusive, but he won’t ever make you his girlfriend.

He’ll monopolize your free time to ensure you dont spend time with anyone else, but he wont commit.

Youll never meet his friends or family, so dont even try.

He is in complete control of the relationship because you let him be.

His charm, wit and personality compel you to stay.

His goal is to perpetually keep your relationship in a hostage situation.

You want to see other people, but you dont want to put what you have at risk because its comfortable and fun.

Youre convinced that at some point, hell come to his senses.

He wont.

So, youre going to want to quit while you’re ahead. Dont waste any time.

3. The Egotistical PrickWho Plays On Your Heartstrings

Is it rough to call these people sociopaths?

Theyll do everything they can to make you like them in a short period of time.

Theyll cook you your favorite dinner, buy you nice wine and compliment you on the weird things you wish people would notice.

They make it so easy to let your guard down.

Then, one day, theyll just stop talking to you.

Theyll give you some bullsh*t excuse like theyre just “not ready for a relationship right now, or they really like you, and “it scares” them.

No, you just needed an ego trip. Or, you needed to get laid.

Or both.Whatever.

These types of guys are the reason all women are a little hesitant, confused, broken and yes crazy.

There are plenty of them out there.

4. The Former Frat Guy Who Just Cant Let Go Of College

In my opinion, these guys are the absolute worst.

This is mainly because they dont even realize theyre being the absolute worst. The naivety isnt at all charming.

He doesnt have to be a frat guy. Hes just the guy who loves college.

He cant grow up.

He loves his boys and beer pong more than he loves his job. He knows more about chugging beers than investing in a 401(k).

He has no idea how to start or maintain a conversation. His career path is questionable.

He most likely has the life goal of being a stay-at-home dad.

Thats what she said jokes are far too common, and he finds them far too funny.

While I personally havent gone on a single date with one of these guys, they exist in the masses.

So good luck, female young professionalsof America who thought men matured after college.

AsI say to my dad, “Im looking for the smartest idiot over 25.”

5. The One Youre Just Not That Into

These, for me, are the most common.

Then again, I think they’re common for everyone.

If we were into every person we met, there wouldnt be anyone special, right?

But sometimes, you really want to like someone.

He hasa great job. You love hisfriends and family. He’s funny.

You have everything in common. You can text all day and never run out of things to talk about.

Your Snapchat exchanges keep you laughing all day long.

He’s proud of you. He cares about you.

Youre even a perfect match (according to the stars).

But, you just arent into this person, no matter how hard you try to be.

While relationships take effort, you should never force yourself to fall for someone because you think you’d be great together.

It’s a recipe for disaster and heartbreak, and that’s one sad situationI won’t ever willingly walk into.

So when you find yourself in this kind of mess, you have to break the ice.

It’s unfair to string the other person along when he’s clearly feeling all the emotions you wish you could.

When you’re dating someone youre not into, but whom you love as a human being, breaking the ice is a double-edged sword.

You both end up hurt and bummed.

6.The One

Every person I talk to tells me the one will walk into my life when I least expect it.

It wont be because I spent my entire lunch break swiping left and right (mostly left).

It wont be because I asked my co-workers, friends, family and acquaintances if they know someone else whos completely exhausted by the routine dating scene.

It certainly wont be because I got drunk enough to get the nerve to walk up to a guy and strike up a random conversation.

No way, not me.

Im told Ill meet someone in a sweet form of serendipity.

Ill accidentally spill my coffee on him at Starbucks.

Well bond over the fresh produce at Trader Joes.

Well be at the same bar for happy hour.

Something will happen.

When that something does, in fact, happen, all those heartbreaks, mistakes, moments of weakness and feelings of guilt will wash away.

You won’t question whether your guard should be up or down. What or when to text won’t be a thought.

Everything will slip into place.

Because as everyone always says, “When you know, you know.”

So until then, my advice to every single woman out there is this: Be a lady.

Be fearless, but not careless.

Be willing to love and unafraid to get hurt.

Put yourself out there. Learn to love yourself.

Discover hobbies that fill your time.

But this is the most important piece of advice of all: Never ever settle for any of the five who come before “the one.”

source http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/ from All of Beer http://allofbeer.blogspot.com/2017/09/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve.html

[allofbeercom]

6 Guys Youll End Up Dating When Youve Been Single For Too Long

I’m writing this post from my bed.

I’m un-showered, even though I came home from CrossFit three hours ago.

I’m slugging back red wine and crushing a party size-serving of chips and salsa.

I turned my phone on silent an hour ago, just so I would stop checking to see if the guy I like has responded to the text I sent earlier.

Needless to say, I dont think you get much more single than this.

There are nights when I rejoice in it, and there are nights when I sulk in it.

Tonight, its the latter.

But as I sit here, elbow-deep in a bag of Tostitos and knuckles clenched around a topped-off glass of wine, I cant help but be grateful for this single life Ive been living for almost a year now.

Its an unexpected and for me unwanted learning experience.

I say its “unwanted” because Im the relationship type.

Ive never had a one-night stand (nor will I ever).

I like commitment.

Dating gives me anxiety because I never know what to say or do.

Should I text him first? Will he text me?

Whats the right emoji to use? Should I even use an emoji?

Let me screenshot this and send it to all my friends to see if its okay.

What should I wear?

Unwanted or not, Im on one hell of a self-learning curve.

I think its so important for every woman to have this bittersweet journey, especially in her20s.

Im learning when to keep my guard up and when to let it come crashing down.

Im learning how to be patient.

I’m learning what I like and what I dont.

Im learning so much about myself because Im finding time for myself.

Im trying new things.

I’ve joined CrossFit and hot yoga, and I quit some unhealthy habits that were crippling my self-esteem.

Ive tried tons of new restaurants completely free, thanks to first dates.

But besides learning about myself, Im learning a lot about the dating pool.

Let me tell you this: When they say there are plenty of fish in the sea, it’s true.

But the ones you want to catch are really, really hard to find. They’re borderline nonexistent.

Ive met tons of guys ranging in age, profession, personality, height, hobbies, etc.

However, after dozens and dozens of dates and hundreds of right swipes that have amounted to nothing, Ive been able to put a label on just about every single one.

Ive boiled them down to six main categories:

1. The Ex

When one relationship ends, its so easy to look back at a previous ex and question why that relationship didnt work out either.

Call it delusion or curiosity, but it always seems like a logical first step when youre single.

So, if youre both single, why not give it another whirl?

Its comfortable. Its fun.

Its your opportunity to double-check hes really not the one who got away.

When my high school sweetheart found out that my recent ex and I had ended things, he came back into my life the same way he left it: like a tornado, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.

Without getting into details for his sake (and his girlfriends, whoops), the verdict was we broke up for a reason.

Thats always a validating feeling.

In the words of my inner spirit animal, Taylor Swift, we are never, ever getting back together. Like, ever.

But hey, like I said, it cant hurt to double check.

2. The Non-Committal Charmer

Hell tell you youre exclusive, but he won’t ever make you his girlfriend.

He’ll monopolize your free time to ensure you dont spend time with anyone else, but he wont commit.

Youll never meet his friends or family, so dont even try.

He is in complete control of the relationship because you let him be.

His charm, wit and personality compel you to stay.

His goal is to perpetually keep your relationship in a hostage situation.

You want to see other people, but you dont want to put what you have at risk because its comfortable and fun.

Youre convinced that at some point, hell come to his senses.

He wont.

So, youre going to want to quit while you’re ahead. Dont waste any time.

3. The Egotistical PrickWho Plays On Your Heartstrings

Is it rough to call these people sociopaths?

Theyll do everything they can to make you like them in a short period of time.

Theyll cook you your favorite dinner, buy you nice wine and compliment you on the weird things you wish people would notice.

They make it so easy to let your guard down.

Then, one day, theyll just stop talking to you.

Theyll give you some bullsh*t excuse like theyre just “not ready for a relationship right now, or they really like you, and “it scares” them.

No, you just needed an ego trip. Or, you needed to get laid.

Or both.Whatever.

These types of guys are the reason all women are a little hesitant, confused, broken and yes crazy.

There are plenty of them out there.

4. The Former Frat Guy Who Just Cant Let Go Of College

In my opinion, these guys are the absolute worst.

This is mainly because they dont even realize theyre being the absolute worst. The naivety isnt at all charming.

He doesnt have to be a frat guy. Hes just the guy who loves college.

He cant grow up.

He loves his boys and beer pong more than he loves his job. He knows more about chugging beers than investing in a 401(k).

He has no idea how to start or maintain a conversation. His career path is questionable.

He most likely has the life goal of being a stay-at-home dad.

Thats what she said jokes are far too common, and he finds them far too funny.

While I personally havent gone on a single date with one of these guys, they exist in the masses.

So good luck, female young professionalsof America who thought men matured after college.

AsI say to my dad, “Im looking for the smartest idiot over 25.”

5. The One Youre Just Not That Into

These, for me, are the most common.

Then again, I think they’re common for everyone.

If we were into every person we met, there wouldnt be anyone special, right?

But sometimes, you really want to like someone.

He hasa great job. You love hisfriends and family. He’s funny.

You have everything in common. You can text all day and never run out of things to talk about.

Your Snapchat exchanges keep you laughing all day long.

He’s proud of you. He cares about you.

Youre even a perfect match (according to the stars).

But, you just arent into this person, no matter how hard you try to be.

While relationships take effort, you should never force yourself to fall for someone because you think you’d be great together.

It’s a recipe for disaster and heartbreak, and that’s one sad situationI won’t ever willingly walk into.

So when you find yourself in this kind of mess, you have to break the ice.

It’s unfair to string the other person along when he’s clearly feeling all the emotions you wish you could.

When you’re dating someone youre not into, but whom you love as a human being, breaking the ice is a double-edged sword.

You both end up hurt and bummed.

6.The One

Every person I talk to tells me the one will walk into my life when I least expect it.

It wont be because I spent my entire lunch break swiping left and right (mostly left).

It wont be because I asked my co-workers, friends, family and acquaintances if they know someone else whos completely exhausted by the routine dating scene.

It certainly wont be because I got drunk enough to get the nerve to walk up to a guy and strike up a random conversation.

No way, not me.

Im told Ill meet someone in a sweet form of serendipity.

Ill accidentally spill my coffee on him at Starbucks.

Well bond over the fresh produce at Trader Joes.

Well be at the same bar for happy hour.

Something will happen.

When that something does, in fact, happen, all those heartbreaks, mistakes, moments of weakness and feelings of guilt will wash away.

You won’t question whether your guard should be up or down. What or when to text won’t be a thought.

Everything will slip into place.

Because as everyone always says, “When you know, you know.”

So until then, my advice to every single woman out there is this: Be a lady.

Be fearless, but not careless.

Be willing to love and unafraid to get hurt.

Put yourself out there. Learn to love yourself.

Discover hobbies that fill your time.

But this is the most important piece of advice of all: Never ever settle for any of the five who come before “the one.”

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/27/6-guys-youll-end-up-dating-when-youve-been-single-for-too-long/