#i could've sworn i posted this but apparently i didn't?

[emilyliuwho]

across every lifetime

[who-the-fuck-is-sennalye]

You know it's honestly impressive my boohbah fanfiction managed 56 reads on wattpad. I couldn't find it and I was looking for it.

[axl-fox]

Pile of old dragon ball fanart I could've sworn I posted here but apparently I didn't.

Well, its mostly Shin (and Beerus) 😂

[suzukiblu]

Been looking through your assorted aus page and the link for "weird amnesia Timberkon"/"for the game young" is broken (as in, the tag does not appear to exist). It seems like you put a lot of time into that page so I figured you'd want to know (and also selfishly I am very interested in finding out what weird amnesia timberkon entails)

WHOOPS, my bad, messed that one up. Should be all fixed on the page now, though! Oddly I only seem to have one teeny lil' snippet up for that AU, to my surprise, could've sworn I'd posted more? Sooooo as thanks for catching that busted link for me, have a nice big chunk of the WIP behind this read-more, hah.

So Superboy is apparently an idiot. Then again, whatever, if Bernard were an indestructible telekinetic half-alien he would probably also not worry too much about looking subtle in his civvies or maintaining a secret identity, and also it's been a while since he's heard anything about the guy doing any active superheroing anyway so maybe Superboy is just assuming that the entire planet somehow forgot about his teen heartthrob superhero posters and all those close-up high-def publicity shots of his very public face and whatever? Oh, and also that one time that he literally fucking died to save the whole freaking world and the big ol' memorial statue. Statues? There might've been two, come to think. 

So maybe an idiot. 

A very hot idiot, though. 

Well, whatever, Bernard figures, taking a sip of his boba tea and idly watching Superboy check out his boyfriend from the far side of the cafe like he's a sad puppy in a shop window who just wants a little love. Tim is looking at his phone and appears oblivious to Superboy's existence. 

Bernard assumes Tim's doing that thing where he pretends to not be Robin, for obvious reasons. That thing remains adorable but is getting increasingly less convincing as time goes on. Like, he really doesn't know what Tim actually thinks he thinks he does in his downtime? There is no logical reason for a civilian to be either as ripped or as scarred as Tim Drake is, but part of being Tim Drake's boyfriend is pretending to be oblivious to those facts and also never questioning his flimsy excuses to run off at a moment's notice or disappear during a crisis or whatever else. 

Bernard tries to figure out how to politely extricate himself from the situation for long enough for Tim to go check up on Superboy, because Superboy very clearly needs to be checked up on. Unfortunately he went to the bathroom like ten minutes before the guy walked in all sad-puppy so the obvious option is out, and Tim knows damn well he isn't gonna call his parents for anything less than a full-on emergency, and his friends it'd be weird not to just text, and . . . fuck, he doesn't know. He needs an angle here. 

"I'll be right back, babe, just gotta duck into the bathroom real quick," Tim says, glancing up from his phone with an apologetic smile. Bernard relaxes slightly. Okay, that works, thank you, Bat-planning. Superboy can just follow Tim back to the bathroom and they can do whatever superhero sidebar they need to do back there. 

But then Tim gets up, gives him a peck on the cheek, and heads back to the bathroom, and Superboy . . . doesn't follow him. 

The hell? 

Bernard represses a frown and takes another sip of his boba. Superboy continues not to follow Tim. He just sits there at his own little table with his completely untouched drink, looking like the saddest puppy that has ever sadded. 

Bernard is mystified. 

Are they having a fight, maybe? Is Tim ignoring Superboy because of that, not the secret ID stuff? That seems weird and not very Tim-like, fighting or not. But Superboy's in Gotham and came into the cafe after they did, so he can't be the one avoiding Tim. But also he didn't follow him to the bathroom when presented with the very unsubtle opportunity to do so, so . . . what the hell? 

Weird. 

Bernard takes yet another sip of boba and keeps watching Superboy. Superboy seems oblivious to said watching, but he guesses the guy is pretty famous and is a very public superhero and is always doing impressive shit and all that, so he's probably used to being watched. Oh, and also he's stupid, stupid hot. 

Bernard cannot imagine being this used to attention, but apparently Superboy is. Bernard, of course, is not a punk idol superhero built like a porn star and a supermodel had a threeway with a bodybuilder. So like, that particular bit of mental dissonance probably makes sense and all. Life experiences are not universal, and all that. 

Especially not when the life experience one is comparing oneself to started in a cloning tube. 

Well, it's not like it's a burden for Bernard to have a free pass on checking out a hottie while he waits for Tim to come back from, presumably, waiting for Superboy to come and talk to him. Which Superboy is just . . . not doing, still. Inexplicably. 

Still, sad puppy or not, Superboy's civvies look damn good on him, so that's something. Bernard's enjoying them, like as an aesthetic experience and everything. Superboy's wearing an unbuttoned red flannel shirt with rolled-up sleeves over a very tight black tank top and even tighter light wash skinny jeans that are bafflingly intact, considering the fact that a dude with Kryptonian-level super-strength is currently vacuum-sealed into them. 

Does tactile telekinesis work on skinny jeans? Is that a thing? Like, are Superboy's jeans currently indestructible? 

That sounds amazing, actually. 

Also, those buckled-up black leather boots he's wearing look like they could straight-up kill a dude, Kryptonian power-assist or not. And the shiny mirrored sunglasses and ridiculous multitude of even shinier gold piercings all suit the guy, somehow, and even without looking like too much. 

Relatedly, Superboy's tank top is very, very tight. 

Also relatedly, his nipples are apparently pierced. 

And so is his belly button, it looks like. 

Ngh. 

Superboy's vacuum-sealed jeans are not quite tight enough for Bernard to figure out if he's got any below the spike-studded belt piercings, but his imagination is happy to fill in the blanks there. He's tempted to ask for Tim's theories on the existence of any such piercings, because yeah Superboy has super-hearing but Bernard has no shame and Tim logically should know, buuuuut he's still pretending not to know Tim is Robin so yeah, probably he shouldn't do that. 

He could start a new conspiracy board for it, maybe. That'd be fun. 

Superboy also has leather cuffs on his wrists and mismatched rings and necklaces and a really hot fade haircut that is noticeably windswept, and really, really looks like something that Bernard would like to see somebody dig their fingers into. Just–look, there's curls. Bernard cannot be blamed for curls. 

And he's trying not to eye the cuff bracelets too much, but they provide very nice inspiration for a certain style of kinky thoughts. Not that Superboy couldn't snap basically any set of cuffs that wasn't made of kryptonite or promethium or like a magical kryptonite-promethium alloy or whatever without even trying, obviously, but like, somehow the thought of the guy having to restrain himself more than anything else makes the whole mental image hotter? Like, somehow? 

Bernard pictures Superboy wearing a pair of cheap flimsy sex toy handcuffs and trying very, very hard to keep himself in them while someone else takes very careful inventory of all his piercings, wherever and whatever they all just so happen to be. 

Jesus. Yeah, there's a thought. 

Is it weird to consider flirting up your boyfriend's superhero bestie while he's badly pretending to be a civilian, Bernard wonders? Is that a thing? 

Probably, but he still has no shame and is also in an open relationship, so whatever. 

Hell, who knows, in retrospect maybe Tim actually arranged this setup specifically for Bernard to get an eyeful of his work crush. Like, Bernard always felt like Robin and Superboy had some significant UST going back in the day. Maybe Tim wants to finally do something about that, and the setup idea sounds like a very "Bat" approach to doing said something. And it'd explain why Superboy didn't follow Tim to the bathroom and maybe even why he's coming across kind of anxious right now, if he's trying to psych himself up to come over or something. Like, if he's nervous about making a good impression, though Bernard cannot imagine why he ever would be. Well, not like Supers are known for their undercover skills, so . . . 

Either way, if that's the plan, Bernard is very fine with it, so he decides to go find out for himself and picks up his drink to head over and chat the guy up. Worst case scenario, he’s just gotten his hopes up a little, he figures. Best case, he’s putting Superboy out of his “oh god, how do I do undercover” misery. 

"Mind if I sit?" he asks, and flashes Superboy a grin as he gestures at the empty seat at the other half of his table. Superboy looks weirdly startled, like he somehow expected to go unnoticed despite being a literal superhero who is also unspeakably hot and is also wearing very, very tight clothes that he's this close to busting out of. Like, at least half a dozen girls are actively checking him out right now, as is the dude behind the counter and the old guy on the sidewalk outside who’s busy badly pretending to be reading the outdoor menu board instead of checking out Superboy’s ass through the front window. 

So yeah, Bernard really does not understand that apparent assumption. 

Come to think, maybe Superboy has some self-esteem issues or something. Bernard admittedly might also have self-esteem issues if he were Superman's clone. Then again, if he were Superman's clone, he would look like Superman and also be very aware of how Superman himself looks, sooooo . . . 

Seriously, "younger and sexier punk rock Superman" is not a vibe that Bernard can imagine going ignored all that often. Or ever. 

“Uh–what?” Superboy says. 

“I’ve been temporarily abandoned by my boyfriend and I’m easily bored,” Bernard clarifies politely, though obviously Superboy was staring at Tim long enough to have noticed said abandonment the moment it happened. “So, mind if I sit?” 

“I–sure?” Superboy says, looking nervous. Bernard puts another tally in the “too bad at undercover work to follow the Bat-plan” column. Whatever, the guy’s trying his best, he’s not gonna judge him. 

There's a pin on the inside of Superboy’s flannel, Bernard notices as the other shifts awkwardly in his seat, and is vaguely puzzled by the sight of it. Like, it's just a little thing and he doubts he'd have even seen it if he weren't in this close to the guy, but . . . 

Just–yeah. Little pin. Just like a cheap little round button, like the kind that comes out of the dollar bin at all sorts of random stores. And it's hidden inside Superboy's flannel, mostly, but it's definitely got the S-shield on it. 

Bernard is perplexed. Even in Gotham, it's not like it's weird to see people wearing Superman merch. So like, why is Superboy hiding that?

“Cool,” he says as he files that away as a little oddity, and takes the empty seat. Superboy continues to look nervous. Bernard continues to work on figuring out if his weird Bat-boyfriend who he’s not supposed to know is a Bat set him up on a blind date with his superhero bestie. The nervousness supports the theory, anyway. 

Man, this dude really is even prettier up close. How was he Tim’s bisexual awakening with this guy around and in close quarters with him? Like, he’s flattered, don’t get him wrong, but also maybe Tim has some vision problems and he should get that checked out before it inconveniences his nightlife. 

"Sooooo like . . . what do I call you?" Bernard asks, peering across the table at him curiously. "Because the obvious option seems like a bad idea, obviously.” 

"‘The obvious option’?" Superboy stops looking nervous long enough to look confused instead. 

"Yeah?" Bernard says, cocking his head. Superboy cannot possibly think he’s being subtle here, so . . . "I mean, I assume you don't go by 'Superboy' when you're dressed like that. Like, that's the whole point of being dressed like that, right?" 

Superboy stares blankly at him. Bernard cocks his head the other way, now officially the confused one. 

"What?" Superboy says. 

"Okay, sorry, this is the thing where you-know-who still insists on pretending he's not Robin, isn't it," Bernard realizes, which he really should've realized would be a thing from the start. He supposes that makes sense even with Superboy’s total lack of subtlety, though, superheroes probably do have to really commit to that thing. Especially ones who work for Batman and Superman. Or . . . just around Superman, maybe? Bernard is not fully clear on that particular superhero hierarchy. "My bad. So, uh, what do I call you, because there is obviously no obvious option. Obviously.” 

"You . . . recognize me?" Superboy croaks. 

"Uh," Bernard says, brow furrowing in bemusement at the very weird expression the guy's currently wearing. "Yes? No offense, you're kind of recognizable. Like, do you even have a secret identity? I mean, you're a clone, right, and I know you were just doing the full-time hero thing in at least Hawaii, so I actually have no idea if you ever bothered making one up or not?” 

"You recognize me," Superboy chokes, just staring at him, and then bursts into tears. 

. . . well, that can't be good.

[melsie-sims]

Overdue Update! Happy 2024!

HEY GUYS!! I missed you a lot! 💚💚💚

TL;DR: I'm coming back tomorrow with my Disney BACC!

I could've sworn I posted an "I'm going on a hiatus" post when my queue ran out but apparently I didn't. I'm so sorry! I hope no one was worried.

My game was glitching a lot after the For Rent update... actually, I've been having issues since the cooking overhaul and it's been annoying me to the point where I didn't want to play the game at all. So I took a long break and played other stuff instead.

I'm still having a lot of issues now, most of them involving prepping food on counters and getting my sims to actually eat. They've also been acting like their autonomy is off even though it's not... I've almost had sims die because of that. 🙄 It's tedious in big households, let me tell you (and I'm pretty much only playing with big households at the moment).

Anyway! I'm coming back tomorrow with some fresh new posts despite everything. I'm going to be doing my Disney BACC exclusively for a bit — I don't have the mental capacity to deal with multiple save files right now and Disney is where I wanna be at.

Soooo hope everyone's doing well and has had awesome holidays! Happy 2024 and Happy Simming!

[mikadosis]

halloween decorations

roommate!heeseung x reader || genre: FLUFF, roommates to lovers, lowkey crack???? || warnings: none except for teNsiOn and the reader liking kids i think ???? || wc: N/A || written: october 30th 2021 || posted: november 1st 2022

[A/N: hello hello~! this is one of the first enha imagines/oneshots i've written so please bare with me here loool! sorry for any mistakes, this was written whilst i was supposed to be studying OOP,,, anyways have lots of fun reading !]

"ugh," you exclaimed, trying not to fall off the ladder you were standing on as you hung up fake spider-webs.

"do you uh.... need some help over there?" heeseung had barely stepped foot into the room but he could hear you struggle from outside.

"no- WHY WON'T THIS STAY ON- no, thank you. everything is going just fine." you stated, tongue stuck out in both frustration and focus.

heeseung chuckled at the sight of this. you looked funny. and cute? but more funny than cute.

"FINALLY!" you looked up to the now properly attached spider-web with such adoration- heeseung could've sworn it was your first love. not like the spiderwebs could reciprocate these feelings anyways.

"nice! now please get down before you break your neck," he waddled over and held the ladder with one hand whilst he held the other out for you to hold. you glanced at him and his hand before grabbing it- softly hopping off of the last stair.

"thanks. how's it look? it took me quite some time to do this."

"yeah, i heard." heeseung kisses his teeth as a feeble attempt to conceal his laughter.

"wh- wha-?" you blink up at him in confusion.

he starts imitating and mocking you, mimicking your little stomps in frustration as well as the grunts and moans you apparently let out when frustrated.

your eyes widened and you smacked his arm. "oi! shut it- that's not even true you have no proof i did all of that !"

he grins and yanks his phone out of his pocket, crinkling his loose trousers and making the fabric of his pocket stick out the wrong way in the process.

"would you like me to record next time?"

"HEE-" smacking him and your forehead at the same time, you decided to just lose faith in humanity (or at least in heeseung) for a minute whilst you check up on the cookies in the oven.

you walk into the kitchen and heeseung mindlessly follows you with a smile. you really did look nice in your oversized jumper, the one you swore to give back to heeseung that one time, the one he actually much preferred you to keep though he would never say it out loud. he'd give you more of his hoodies if people just didn't make it weird- he liked you as a friend! friends were allowed to like each other like this, right? the way he looks at you is how friends look at one another, right? he's allowed to want to hug you sometimes, right? he's allowed to have the urge to ki-

"NOOOOOO," you cried out, "MY POOR BABIES" heeseungs eyes grew in size as he heard you mourn over said "poor babies". he rushed over and glanced you up and down to see if you were hurt before anything else. once he had come to the realisation that the now burnt cookies were in fact "your poor babies", he sighed in relief and put his hand over his heart in worry.

you take the cookies out in a rush, almost burning yourself. "be careful-!," he grasps your arm in a rough manner but quickly softens his grip, tugging at your sleeve in concern. "you dumbass, you might burn yourself."

chuckling at his pouty remark, you brush him off of you. "i won't, i promise!" you shook your head as heeseung watched your eyes glaze over as you looked at him. he'd been much more caring towards you nowadays. you'd be lying if you said it didn't make your heart flutter ever so often- but that could happen to anyone! so it couldn't have meant anything. little do you know you're not the only one whose heartbeat quickens at the sight of their roommate.

you take the baking tray out of the oven and sulk. poor cookies deserved better :( leaning on the counter, you let your face sink in your hands as way to exaggerate your emotions. heeseung snorts at this and copies, both elbows on the counter while he leans over and gazes at the cookies in sadness.

he turns his head and stares at you and you can feel his eyes on you. you turn your head and make eyecontact as he smiles at you sweetly. (ngl your heart kinda skips a beat but we don't talk abt that in this pious household,,, no boyfriend until marriage /j) he scoots over a bit closer and he rests his hand on your lower back as he reassures you; "it's okay, we can burn the cookies together next time".

....

of course that was how he was going to comfort you. you groan and your head droops, hair falling in front of your face doing a great job at hiding it. heeseung's cackling at his own joke all the while but he's slowly calming down. you can hear him slump into the same position he was just now, yet again looking at you. and again, he scoots closer. but this time you feel the side of his thighs and upper body brush up against yours while your both slumped on the counter looking somewhat depressed. (omg having your depression arc together how romantic) his breath fans your face and the tip of his nose brushes against your hair. you can imagine him scrunching his nose at the feeling and you smile at the thought, but you're caught off guard when you feel heeseungs hand move your hair and tuck it behind your ear. slightly stunned, you blush and look at him with the same doe eyes he's giving you.

he leans even closer and his hand goes back up to your hair. he's about to say something when the two of you are rudely interrupted by a startling knock. blinking violently, you try to snap out of it after having stared at the fine man for a few more seconds and strut over to the door, opening it with newfound excitement.

"trick or treat!" boy oh boy is this friendgroup BIG or do you just not have friends. you mentally count as you smile at them, reaching over to the bowl of candy you had set out earlier. ....20, 21, 22, 23 kids ??? where are all these little spawns of [depends what mood they're in] coming from ???? who's having this many children let's have a chat ???? you silently wish you have enough candy in the bowl for all of them as you didn't expect this many children to show up- or at least, not at once. most of them grab one politely and you seem to have enough for all and maybe a few more kids after this, but not until one of them snatches a handful and dashes off. your mouth fell open at the interaction and your bowl of candy was now near-empty. the other kids smile at you apologetically.

"sorry miss, he's a bit of a troublemaker." one of them speaks.

you grin at this, shaking off their worries. "don't you worry! better tell him not to do that again, but go be kids and have fun. don't scare too many people out there!" you nod over at the other side of the street and they all give you heart-warming smiles, content with the advice you gave the. (and the candy of course, bu-)

gently closing the door with a click, you walk back into the kitchen almost having forgotten what heeseung and you were about to do before you were interrupted by those 23 (22) little sweethearts. and to be honest, you probably wouldn't have remembered tonight with the thought of those kids, if it wasn't for heeseung staring you with love-filled eyes. your eyes slightly widen and the blush you were able to quickly rid of now found its way back onto your face, maybe even stronger than before. you shake your head and decide to ignore the... obviously lovestruck boy as you grab more candy to fill the shallow bowl. (and your heart maybe)

for some reason, the bag of candy was in your cupboard on the top shelf- one you couldn't reach. you glance at heeseung and contemplate asking for help but once you see him still staring at you, not having said a word you decide it's probably better to struggle than to confront whatever's going on between the both of you.

you stand on your tippytoes in order to reach but no avail. only when you grunted in frustration like you always do, heeseung snaps out of it and realises you're trying to grab the bag of candy. he shifts and you hear him do so, so before he could approach you and mock you again you turn around and stare him down. a few seconds of silence pass.

"....i can hel-" at last, he tries to break the silence-

"no-!,, no! it's fine, i'm a strong independant woman i can DO this!" you exclaim and turn back around, ready for take two.

"no really i ca-"

"no i've got this!" you don't even bother to turn around, to stubborn to let him help you.

"listen-"

you don't listen to him and climb onto the counter to reach the bag of candy. he gasps out and reaches for your back as you turn, still on your knees on the counter. grinning in victory, you wave the bag of candy in front of his face and sit on the counter proudly.

"that was... dangerous. and also the most you-thing i've ever seen." he states, rubbing at his temples.

you snicker, "oh really?", you decide to sit on the counter and grab a lollipop from the bag, unwrapping it and popping it into your mouth while you swing your legs. "so i'm dangerous?"

heeseung looks up at you and tilts his head. this girl was going to drive him mad. he steps closer to your figure that's sat on the counter. "give me some time to think about that one...." he trails off, staring you down.

you freeze and gawk at him, the rate your heart's beating at rapidly increasing as the tension dawns upon you.

heeseung leans just a tad closer, now putting his hands on either side of you, trapping you. he straightens his posture but lets himself be at the same proximity, your legs almost touching his lower stomach as they dangle off of the rim of the marble.

you take the lollipop out of your mouth and he glances down at your lips, licking his own. you let your hand lay over his, and he shoots a quick look to the unexpected extra warmth. your hand slides up all the way onto his shoulder. he leans even closer and you do too, your arm wrapping around his neck and playing with the hairs as his nose brushes against yours. his eyes flutter shut at the sensation and he sucks in a deep breath as you internally panic at what's about to happen. opening his eyes one last time, he makes eye contact with you as you softly mutter out a "kiss me".

and he does. he shuts his eyes and closes the gap between the two of you. his arms wrap around your waist and he continues passionately, starting to smile into the kiss. you kiss him back just as passionately which makes his heart swell with more love for you, something he realises didn't know was possible.

knock knock!

you break the kiss and he immediately chases your lips for more, letting out a low whine. smiling at him, you lean your forehead against his. you start, "i think i should go open the door," "and i think you shouldn't" he replies in a sulky way, almost too quickly. "hee...." you look at him lovingly and caress the back of his neck and hair with your hand. he gives you his doe eyes once more before sighing and nodding in agreement, "yeah, okay. you looked cute when talking to those kids anyway" you glance down shyly, about to hop off of the counter. but as you try to do this, lee heeseung stops you, steals one last chaste kiss and your long-forgotten lollipop with it.

"go on. i'll wait, i'll take this in the meantime though." he raises his brows teasingly and gestures towards the stolen lollipop. "if i can't get kisses i'll take whatever i have left of you. it's only fair."

you roll your eyes playfully and hop off of the counter, making your way to the door. swinging it open, you are left alone to your surprise.

"huh?", you quickly checked around the corners, "i swear someone knocked on the door just now?"

heeseung took the lollipop out of his mouth with a pop! and walked up to you with a frown on his face. "i did too? that's strange,"

and you're glad you decided to check the corners once more, because you see the same mischievous kid who stole nearly all your candy run off in the opposite direction, giggling to himself. you didn't know whether to thank him for allowing heeseung and you to have this moment, or to curse him for also ruining it. you click your tongue and close the door with a grin.

"so there was no one there?" the lovesick boy inquiered over your shoulder, your back still turned to him. you hear him chuck something as you answer.

"nope," you sigh out and turn around, facing him.

"....so we're all alone again?"

"heesEUN-" but before you could finish your sentence, he had already pinned you against the door, leaving no time for you to take a breath as he immediately kisses you again.

hi hi! mika here. so, my writing style has changed quite a lot i guess.... i wanted to post something but didn't have any time and now i'm too late for halloween. hope you can enjoy this anyway, not proofread lol so sorry! it's an old draft as you can see, not sure what i was thinking lol

[underswap]

(Simple question), can we see the designs of toriel and asgore of this underswap, or no?

huh, I really could've sworn I posted this line up I did somewhere way back when we were doing this, but apparently I never did, or maybe I meant to post it with a lot of stuff and never got around to it. thanks for the reminder nonny

and since I'm here: two more things I really thought I'd posted but didn't as far as I can see:

I think I've got some unfinished wips somewhere too for this AU that I might have to dig up now.

[sflow-er]

Lol apparently it's my 2 year anniversary on tumblr...

I could've sworn I lurked the YR tag without an account for longer than a month, but I guess it's understandable that my memory fails me. I'd been coming here to lurk on various fandoms for years already, and I didn't join the YR fandom properly even after making this blog. Hell, I only changed the name so it could be traced back to my ao3 in...November, when I happened to see a lovely post about my fic and wanted to thank the person who made it.

Anyway. Two years on tumblr, by some metric.

[muddyorbsblr]

ohh hey it's the last day of 2022

first of all, when the fuck did that happen??

There was so much that happened in the last year I could've sworn some of them happened in 2021, but apparently not…? It's honestly so hard to believe that when this year started, I was in a different mindset, a different community, struggling AF to get anything going creatively, and frustrated to the high heavens as a creator because I felt…well, I felt alone.

And that was how it felt for the first 8 months of the year. I felt like I was pushing this impossibly heavy rock up a steep mountain with no hopes of ever actually getting anywhere because I was in a community that gave such elitist vibes that even though I'd been there for 2-3 years, I still felt like an outsider. Surrounded by people who internally held you to this grading scale and only if you reached a certain "score" with them would they think that you're "worthy" of a like and comment.

Honestly there was a time I uploaded a video every day for two months and all I got was silence, and while I never gave a fuck about the numbers, admittedly it would have been nice to even get a "wow i loved this!" from the people who called me "one of their closest friends in the community". Like…you say that the love is there but…I don't feel it? And honestly being 'friends' with people like that felt a lot like this:

And then a shift happened, and I somehow found myself back here on Tumblr looking up Loki fan fiction because I'd just started simping over Tom Hiddleston full force and there's a warm fuzzy feeling I get from reading fanfics that never went away, and reading them again somehow felt like finally coming home.

I gotta admit though, I lurked for a few months. 🤡

Started off just reading stuff and not saying anything, then leading to me leaving likes on masterlists so that I could come back to them and go through them one by one, and I didn't do much besides that for a few weeks. And then I saw a post about how comments and reblogs kept the authors that we love motivated to keep on making stories for us, so I gave my trauma from bad interactions in previous communities a resounding 'fuck you' and began to comment. And then that led to me reviving this blog of mine so that I could reblog those stories to share them with all 40+ of my followers at the time who I knew would get whiplash because I'm not posting about Markiplier anymore.

All those little efforts culminated in me joining in on a thirst train that ended up rekindling my love for creating stories, which led to 'what's today again?' and I gotta be honest, I thought that was all I had in me. But then idea after idea came and I kept on writing stories, and suddenly we're here…a little over three months later, and those 40+ strangers who couldn't care less about what I was posting on this account became nearly a thousand (???) that saw the work I was putting out on the internet and actually enjoying it and telling me that they enjoyed it.

Suddenly I have friends again that I love talking to and that I want to give back the love that I receive from them with everything I've got. Talking with people about things that I love and not feeling like I'm being a burden to them (which is honestly the biggest thing for me 🥹). It's because of all of them that I'm looking forward to seeing what 2023 has in store because I'm surrounded by people who care the same way that I care, and we all get to be weird and thirsty and horny together.

So here's to the people who saved 2022 for me. For turning not only the year but my life as a whole around, for being there to talk to about literally anything, and for creating a place where I felt safe enough to start sharing parts of myself that I'd had locked away for years. Honestly, I never thought I'd be sharing my writing with anyone ever again, but I'm really glad that I had y'all to encourage me and tell me to keep going, and that it definitely wasn't going to be the death of me if I began creating a story about Loki falling in love with Thor's daughter 🤣

Here's to 2023. May it be filled with many laughs, thots, and mangoes.

@lokisgoodgirl @mygfloki @sarahscribbles @give-me-a-moose @mochie85 @fictive-sl0th @gigglingtigger @kikster606 @xorpsbane @mischief2sarawr @wheredafandomat @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @simplyholl @joyful-enchantress @lokiprompts @cake-writes @holymultiplefandomsbatman @loopsisloops @michelleleewise @vbecker10 @holdmytesseract @thedistractedagglomeration

[wholemonsternut]

i was clipping my nails & i just remembered a story that made me very sensitive abt my my own nails ever since i was a kid haha

there is some gore to it so it is spooky month themed XD

i have those long nails where the nail bed goes all the way to the tip of the finger so that means any growth (the white free edge part) results in my nails sticking out like claws idk moving on...

bc of how it is, the very end of the nail bed is very exposed & be easily cut into. earlier this year, i was opening a box & i wasn't careful enough with where i placed my fingers so one of the corners wedged itself between my right ring finger nail & i bled a significant amount & i could've sworn if i had truly panicked & yanked my hand the wrong direction, half of the nail would be ripped off the flesh (that may have been dramatic but this is my post)

>>ANYWAY, that was just exposition just in case any of you friends don't know what it's like to have something like that because that is a key detail in this story

for some reason my teacher genuinely did not believe that such nails exist (in fairness, at 8yrs old, i have also yet to know anyone else with genetically long nails like mine, so i took her word for it), telling us that it is very unsanitary, unprofessional, & akin to school delinquents to have long nails so she insisted to clip my nails for me

after not only humiliating me amongst my other 8 yr old peers, i also had to stay after the class. she pulled out an assortment of nail clippers & nail files from her purse. & immediately grabs & manhandles my little childish fingers

starting with my right hand, she starts digging the nail clipper into my nail. shocked & ready to cry already, i told her that the nail clipper was too deep & tried to point out that it's gonna bleed while also trying to pull away but she just scoffed (or whatever you'd understand a "tch" as) & held me in a sort of headlock... it felt like i was a sheep being sheered

i wasn't sure what was scarier, the feeling of the large nail clipper being wedged between my nail & flesh that it might as well just pop the whole nail off or the top layer skin being actively cut & yet to bleed to signal to the teacher the she should stop

it took until the we're at the thumb until one of my finger tips are finally stained with blood to have her immediately stop. i was so relieved that it was over & that i still have time to suck up my tears before anyone noticed.

however to her, my fingers are only bleeding because i was moving a lot & making a fuss over nothing

about to move to the left hand, she gave me an opportunity to willingly give my hand without her needing to hold me still. me, being a powerless child, i quickly understood that i do not know how exactly to get out of this situation

so i very hesitantly laid my left hand onto her free hand which she then grabbed the fingers anyway ig because i was very obviously shaking. her grip gets stronger every time i so much as flinch

for some reason, this side hurts more & thinking back i think it's because earlier she was holding my wrist/fingers so tightly that i was kind of numb to the full pain

i had my eyes closed for the most part & heard her sweeping the table (to clean up the nail clippings). i didn't want to be hopeful that it was over like i was minutes ago but i stared at her movements for a few seconds to confirm that she was putting away her things.

standing from my seat, i was ready to run hoping that i could catch that one kid selling bandages but

"where do you have to be so quickly? sit first. i'm not done yet." (best translation i can do, sorry)

she taps the previously mentioned nail file. at this time of my life, i didn't know what those were so i had no idea what she was about to do with a foam stick covered in sandpaper

i had a more verbal reaction with this one. apparently i was being a "whiny, dirty, unkempt, spoiled brat" standing up for myself for not wanting someone to rub my wounds with sandpaper but tbh i think i was a more of a personal opinion

i managed to get out of this part of the manicure session by saying that recess was almost over & i was very hungry

i couldn't find that kid that sold bandages that day btw

thank you so much for joining me in my dramatic retelling of my childhood self's torture session <3

[raayllum]

i’ve been toying around with the idea that rayla gets coined by viren/claudia/aaravos/etc at the end of the season, and i’m kind of vibing with that being the big missing rayla twist at the end of the season. it would work with the cube hostage exchange theory (callum trading the cube for knowledge as to how to free rayla), callum using dark magic/connecting to aaravos at some point in the season (as we see from the teasers, as well as aaron stating once that the only way to free someone from the coins is dark magic- don’t quote me on that, i don’t remember where i saw that), and it would be a good segue into discovering viren’s other coins and possibly freeing rayla’s family within the next few seasons. do you think the theory has any weight? if not, do you have any theories as to when the coin issue will be addressed in the series?

For me I lean away from Rayla being coined simply because I think it's important to her as a character / giving her a sense of peace for her to work towards saving her parents. Not because she feels like she has to redeem herself, but because she wants to save them. Even in TTM at the Moon Nexus, she didn't let herself actually prioritize them, and I get the feeling going into S4 Rayla (who I posit is real for this scenario anyway) will be "I've come back to protect you" to the supreme. Focusing only on how much she hurt him and not how much she actually hurt herself (because when has she ever?)

AKA "I'm sorry I left, but I'm here now, I can help protect you" does not answer "Okay, Rayla, but who is protecting you?"

So I feel like Rayla being coin'd could be an over-correction in some ways and removes the possibility of her showing her growth in 1) pursuing something she wants, 2) letting Callum help, and 3) piecing her family back together directly. Unless Callum frees just her first and then her parents, but I still think like... Rayla would only be dealing with the aftermath of Callum having been in danger, then, not witnessing it herself (which I think is way more terrible to / for her, and why I prefer it, because I'm horrible, lmao). It'd also mean removing Rayla from the plot far longer than is feasible and again, she wouldn't be able to know what's fully happening until long after, probably, so I get stuck on the hindrances of the delay

It was an old immediate post-S3 interview but I do remember the one you're referring to! It's stated that it's likely / possible that only dark magic could reverse the coin'ing process, but we still know very little about how the coins work - and magical limitations (like humans not learning primal magic) has often been untrue. That, and the coin spell and mirror spell seem exceedingly similar which makes me think they can both be undone with primal magic (unless Avizandum was a massive hypocrite, but we'll have to wait and see)

I have talked about my notions regarding the Coin theory and I could've sworn it got tossed into a proper meta post but apparently not?

So I think if Rayla does get captured, she may get threatened by the coins or have the opportunity to see them more closely. This lets her realize her parents are in there (as unless she's discovered something somehow while she's been gone, she still has no clue) and I think that would be her main motivation in S5. I feel like we have to have most of the main team Together in by S6 so that it can be a "We have basically all our possible allies and we still lost and lost hard" in S6, and I think S5 works because 1) it's enough of a victory but still has a interesting emotional aftermath that idk if the final season would have room for and 2) I don't think it would work as well in S6 because again, we want a massive defeat for our heroes, and I feel like that could feel a bit too much like a Win, tbh, for that sense of devastation to really set in

Basically: I don't think Rayla also needs to be in a coin, as her being just taken captive does the same legwork but with less logistics to jump through, and while I think she's probably still hiding something about why she came back, I do think she's probably real, just we know she's with the gang until Rex Igneous (4x08) and it'd be a massive fallout with very little time to work retroactively with in recontexualizing. Not impossible, but very difficult to pull off in such limited time

[the-laridian]

Wordcount 02 May 2022

Bad Trip edit: 1353. Time to get back to posting this (couldn't really do it while on vacation. Yes, I know, theoretically you can. I was on vacation.)

Hippie AU: 812. Some actual happy times, having fun at a waterpark.

Sequel to that fic I finished yesterday: 4071. Sometimes you just gotta get a fic out of your system so you can work on something else.

Could've sworn some of Mob AU got written, but it didn't, apparently.

I did get some Art Therapy done - writing in the journal - next up is writing the story around those journal pages. Excited to get back to this. Also excited to get back to Viva New Vegas if I can keep up momentum (see above: get that other fic out of my head so I can focus on the WIPs instead). 

Also: *plays a game *remembers how much fun that fix-it fic was *hey I could do a whole new fix-it fic *no, I don't need yet another WIP, thanks very much

Total for today: 6236

Total for May: 11,972

Total for 2022: 758,261

[b4tasquad]

No because if this happens to some of you guys just send in another ask letting me know and I’ll make sure not to post😭 I know I might seem like a bitch but I wouldn’t stoop that low I swear

No cause I could've SWORN I did this once and then I was like "its fine I forgot to put the emoji at the end anyways' it was not fine

But then you posted it, and apparently, I either clicked the button before I started typing, or I hit it so fast I didn't clock it. The relief I felt that day

-💕

THE FEAR OMG😭

[brick-a-doodle-do]

I am just a very sad person most of the time lol

I just use my stories and drawings to alter my thoughts and distract myselllllff

I know you don't forget I was just feeling somewhat like it hadn't been seen, you know, like you didn't see the message of it being answered at all?

I also have doubts of being liked sooooooo easily bc my dad is a jerk and a narcissist so I grew up with him putting me down when he eventually comes home...he's gone for most of the year bc of his semi truck driving job and is only home maybe three or four times a year yay

A warning I should have provided long ago for everyone interacting with me:

I easily think I did/said something wrong, feel forgotten or scared (one reason I don't immediately upload my stories when they're done), and don't feel like I'm deserving how much you love my ocs

Oh but brick, you actually pulled me out of that and had me finally start posting things on here and sharing my characters so THANK YOU

And when I mention or complain about something like I just did (I'm sorry I did I didn't know how else to say it) I usually get lost on how to approach the topic and could come off too serious or maybe mad entirely on accident when I was just curious or wanting to know if it was at least seen, oops...it's fine to not read immediately I just thought it got buried into invisibility

i did see the post and i could've sworn i liked it but apparently not,,, but i read it now! kinda upset i didn't before,, usually what i do is "i'll read this later" yk that kinda thing, bad habit but yk,, so you're never forgotten just procrastinated on!

3d i'm sorry that sounds terrible :( i hope you're doing alright nowadays <3

(sorry i drafted this in a rush)

it's totally fine, i promise that you're never forgotten in this community!! i think a loooot of people can second that :)

i'm glad i managed to help you! your brain is awesome i love seeing what you come up with :D

that's totally alg as well, maybe i shouldn't lean so hard in one direction when tryna read tones. maybe try out tone tags? they help a lot,,,

[ethtyn]

i could've sworn that i'd posted about it when i watched grian's 3l/ll povs but apparently not? i can't find the posts if i did. rip

edit: didn't post about it here either. maybe i just went insane in my own head as god intended 😐

[85-rend]

about the previous post I just realized all the pictures I had of her are gone I could've sworn I at least had a couple left but apparently not:(

I know my mom still has some pictures of Fae somewhere she keeps like everything archived so all is not lost!

for now if you're wondering what she looked like she was the tiniest tuxedo cat ever she was pretty much kitten sized her whole life and she was very quiet didn't meow much and when she did very soft