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elsadidherbestokay · 4 years

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Okay so I haven’t actually written fanfiction (I do write poems still) since I was 13 and wrote some truly awful stories, all of which I abandoned two chapters in but Frozen is really calling me so I guess now I’m writing fanfics. Any feedback is welcomed, especially constructive criticism but uhhh tbh I’m nervous posting it because I’m not a very good writer and I use commas like an idiot but anyway I hope some of yall enjoy it?

One shot, 2k.

Gale won’t carry a note to the forest. Anna knows he’s probably just busy, so why is it so hard to breathe all of the sudden? Luckily Elsa is never too far away.

Gale always came when she called. Always. Even the times early on when she woke up in the dead of night and just needed to hear from Elsa to ease that little spark of fear deep within. It took only a few midnight notes for her terror to ease, knowing Gale would have a hastily scrawled note reassuring her of Elsa’s love and making plans to visit the next day within her hands in a half hour. Sure, the little wind spirit would sometimes take a moment or two to respond but never long enough for Anna to call more than twice and usually even that was overkill, the playful breeze blowing in the exact second Anna started to call a second time. She swore Gale waited for her to call again on purpose, just to take joy in interrupting her.

But certainly Gale had never made her call four times, as was happening now. Anna didn’t, strictly speaking, need Gale. Anna had the kingdom well in hand and notes she actually needed to send were rare. There were many times she felt as though she needed advice though, and Elsa’s letters were always so helpful. She still ended up venting her frustrations over fireside hot chocolate, their little ritual which was a more common these days since Kristoff had implemented a strict “no trade negotiations complaints during family game night” rule after charades devolved into a debate about the best ways to ensure favorable trades. One of the little girls in town had tugged on her sleeve as she passed by, breaking about seven kinds of etiquette in favor of asking her to give Elsa a photograph of her using a real sextant with snowflakes etched into it. It was incredibly cute and exactly something that Elsa would love to see and Anna made sure to tell the apologetic mother that it was quite alright, little children just get so excited and she really wasn’t offended about the breach of protocol and she’d be sure to send it right over.

But Gale just wouldn’t come, no matter how long she stood on her balcony and sang. What if it was something serious? What if there was an emergency and Gale refused to come? After all, the wind spirit couldn’t have known that Anna didn’t actually need help. Despite her best efforts the panic rose in Anna’s throat, binding tight in a way that didn’t particularly care what her rational mind thought, or that Anna had already sent four notes in the past twelve hours, their letters a constant back and forth that mostly consisted of “look how cute this bird I saw is” with a drawing, or “here’s a fact from Olaf xoxo,” a stream of consciousness that neither sister needed but that was nice. Like a conversation over tea, no matter where the other was.

Anna knew full well that Elsa wasn’t missing, that tonight was an important night for her at the Northaldran camp, that game night was tomorrow, and her sister was fine. Olaf was proof of that and Elsa wasn’t exactly in danger from any ordinary accidents of the forest. But the fact that Elsa could contact her perfectly fine and she couldn’t reach Elsa felt too much like the way things used to be, a barrier between them that Anna was powerless against.

It had had her hands shaking a little, rubbing against the thick paper she held in a vain attempt to soothe her. The forest was only two hours away for a single rider on a quick horse but she had official meetings tomorrow and her horse would be too tired for a return trip after just an hour or so there. Neither could she ask another to go in her stead, as Kristoff was needed tomorrow as well and she could not send any other. It wouldn’t be good for Arendelle, for the Queen to be sending anyone she could find off to the forest because she had to wait an hour to send a note there. No, she had to wait until Gale showed up again or Elsa came over for the night. Tomorrow, at the latest, and if not by then than something might actually be wrong. Not that anything was. Everything was fine. Gale was just busy, there was no need to be so absolutely bone deep terrified. Right?

Elsa, meanwhile was completely oblivious to her sister’s growing anxiety. She had taken Gale and the Nokk to Ahtohallan, searching for answers much different than the last time she had gone. Anna had jokingly told her that she was hogging the river of memories all to herself and wouldn’t she consider if the Northuldra wanted to visit while she was telling Anna her newly formed habits and Elsa couldn’t stop considering the possibility. Anna didn’t mean anything by it of course, having always considered it a place of spirits alone when Elsa had told her of the journey there, the deep pitfalls within that gave her confidence she was the only person to step foot there in centuries. But the knowledge of Ahtohallan had to come from somewhere and that meant that somebody had to have been there, right?

Ahtohallan answered her long considered ruminations, showing her Northaldran people from long ago exploring the cave. Only a glimpse, nothing more, but enough to bring ease to her worried mind and reassure her that with the spirits happy once more it was theoretically possible. She would not even consider bringing Anna across the sea if she didn’t know she would be safe within. It would be cruel, to give her such hope, to show her such beauty, and have to drag her out for her own safety before her sister saw what she wished.

No, Elsa’s mind was not on Anna’s current terror but rather, how to present to her the opportunity. If Anna genuinely didn’t want to go that was quite all right but Elsa was determined to make sure she understood that it was safe, that she was welcome to go if she wanted to, because her sister had been through so much, done so much for Elsa and if this would make Anna happy then she would do it in a heart beat.

But the moment she and Gale stepped out into the bright sunlight, they found the Nokk already formed, prancing in distress and Gale seemed to vibrate with energy for a split second before darting off across the sea, quick as could be and utterly terrifying. She had only been inside for an hour or two, and at the camp that morning. What could have possibly gone wrong that quickly?

Heart thumping in sudden terror, Elsa grabbed Nokk’s mane and swung up onto him, knowing he was too worked up to kneel for her and the exact second her feet were both off the ground he took off, surging forwards with a strange determination that Elsa was afraid to find the cause of. But he didn’t take her to the camp. Within a few moments they were at the castle, bounding up an ice staircase to the balcony of Anna’s room and the Nokk vanished. Terrified, Elsa slipped into the open balcony doors to find Anna sobbing heavily, curled around a pillow that was wet from tears and Gale fluttering around the room in obvious distress. Her sister didn’t even notice their arrival.

“Anna? Anna, what’s wrong?” Elsa dropped to her knees in front of the heavy four posted bed and her sister jolted, throwing herself into Elsa’s arms and sending them both crashing onto the cold concrete. There was a fresh round of wails, Anna burying her face into the crook of Elsa’s neck as she held her tightly.

“I’m s-s-sorry!” Anna cried, “I couldn’t call you,” and here her voice hitched. Elsa instantly felt awful. She had been singing, a lullaby that Maren had taught her last week. To think that her sister was beside herself with worry at the sudden inability to contact her while Elsa had been twirling in the snow, happy beyond belief at the prospect of sharing the hall of memories. Gale couldn’t have heard.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for Anna, I took Gale with me to Ahtohallan. He couldn’t hear you inside. The second we stepped out he shot off to you, of course you were frightened.” Anna’s sobs slowly started to fade away. “It’s okay Anna, I’d be terrified if it was the other way around. But I promise you, I’ll never let that happen ever again.” Elsa pulled away just a tiny bit, creating trio of snow doves and sending every bit of the love she had for her sister into them. They flapped their wings as the magic in them brought them to life, flying a quick circle around the room before returning. The largest one claimed Anna’s lap to snuggle into while the other two landed on Elsa’s outstretched arm.

“Oh Elsa!” Anna stroked the largest one’s head gently as it cooed. “They’re beautiful!”

“They’re alive, they’ll stay with you when I leave. I wish I had thought of this much sooner but they can carry notes. I don’t know if they’ll be able to find me inside Ahtohallan but we’ll do an experiment sometime to find out. I think they’ll be able to find me in the regular forest with ease. Gale will still come of course but we’ll give the little guy a break, huh?” Gale tossed Elsa’s hair into her face at the mention of his name and she smiled.

“You’re off note passing duty Gale, how about that? And thank you Elsa, I don’t know what came over me. I knew Gale was just busy but I just started to feel so worried. I haven‘t felt like I couldn’t reach you in so long, it felt like I couldn’t breathe.”

Elsa took her sister’s hands in her own, ducking her head to make eye contact the way Anna had so often done for her. “Do you remember, when we first opened up the palace how often I was overwhelmed just by touching things? I wore the gloves for so long that the feeling of textures felt wrong sometimes, even though I knew it was okay.”

Anna smiled sadly. “I remember when you carried that velvet book around for a week because you couldn’t believe how soft it was.”

“Even when you know things are different, some things just set you off until you the then bleeds into the now. But you’ll always have the birds now, so you never once have to feel like you can’t reach me, okay? You have three of them and Gale will still come to you, so you can send me all the notes your heart desires and the second you ask for it I’ll be on my way. I love getting to use my powers so freely and knowing that I can help both countries this way but Anna, I will never let you feel alone because of it, okay?”

"Thank you,” Anna said softly. “I love you.”

“I love you too. Come to Ahtohallan with me, I’d like to show you something.”

“What??” Anna cried, any lingering tears quickly forgotten in her surprise. Elsa laughed, grin spreading across her face at the sheer excitement on her sisters’.

“I mean it. That’s what I was doing earlier, asking if anyone else has even been there. It showed me a group of Northaldrans there many centuries ago and so I think it would be safe for you. I didn’t want to offer until I knew for sure you’d be able to go all the way into the hall of memories. Of course, you don’t have to go and if you’d rather not I understand and I--” Anna’s hand was suddenly shushing her.

“Elsa,” she said quite seriously. “I can think of nothing I’d like more than see Ahtohallan with you.”

It wasn’t until the next morning that Anna remembered last night was meant to be a celebration of her sister’s first hunting trip for the village. Her sister waved it away when Anna apologized, telling her that she had already caught the food and she certainly didn’t need the celebration for it but her message was undercut by the two letters from last week about how excited she was to so be accepted into the village. Anna felt awful but so, so loved.

#frozen #frozen 2 #anna #elsa #frozen fanfiction #frozen 2 fanfiction

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fandomthesickness · 6 years

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VLD SPOILERS. DON’T READ IF YOU DON’T WANT SPOILERS

Ok wassup yall. Its 8:32 pm at night and I have finally finished Voltron Season 7. Here are my thoughts….

DISCLAIMER: IM NOT SENDING HATE AT ALL TO THE CAST OR WRITERS. THEY ARE PHENOMENAL AND IM JUST EXPRESSING MY THOUGHTS IN A CALM MANNER. OK THANK YOU.

A D A M - What. Happened. I. Didn’t. Think. He. Would. Be. Dead. I thought we were gonna bond with him and see some cute Shiro and Adam. I thought they would get together and hash all out all their problems. So… I guess that’s not what we saw. I was shell shocked to see him dead. At first, I thought he would be like Matt. Everyone would think he’s dead with his tombstone but turns out he secretly would have survived. But seeing how they deeply emphasized his death in the last episode, I don’t think it was the case.

T H E A L T E A N - So me and my friend were watching Voltron together and when that new robot approached, I automatically thought….”That robot is giving me some Altean vibes but it is also giving me some Galran vibes too… hmmm… could it be Lotor with his generals? Wait no… LOTOR AND HIS ALTEAN COLONY?” Aaaaaaannnnnnnd BOOM. It turned out to be an Altean! I don’t really know what to think. I wouldn’t think an Altean would attack Voltron since their leader created it. I’m guessing it is an Altean under the impression that Voltron killed Lotor since Lotor hasn’t been seen (except for that pretty weird game show episode). And moooovvvvvviiiing on to my next point….

L O T O R - First off, I wasn’t really expecting Lotor to come back immediately in this season. I always thought he would come back in the last season and deep down… I was hoping for his redemption. Joaquim Dos Santos once said that Lotor had good intensions but his morals were bad (he said something like that feel free to correct me). So, I’m guessing we will see some redemption. But seeing how he came back in the game show episode… I really don’t know what to think tbh. But I really do hope we see him again as he did provide some interesting plot with his really cool character and personality.

T H E G A M E S H O W - Ok let me get something off of my chest, that game show episode was pretty freaking crazy. I personally don’t think it lived up to the other comedic relief episodes (Monsters and Mana, Space Mall). Buuuuttt… It was pretty cool. I was just a little confused seeing Zarkon again since I thought he was dead. But then again, I think I’ll just assume it was for plot convenience. I did appreciate the little Lance humor and Keith banter between the two. I low-key missed that. I did kind of like how Pidge was chosen to save Lance which was cute.

H U N K - HUNK WAS MVP IN THIS SEASON. He came through and deeply improved. We saw a completely new side of him which I absolutely loved. Hats off to you, Lauren and your team. You did an amazing job with his character as it totally came with a bang to all of us. Our cinnamon roll is frickin awesome. The Keith and Hunk hug was so sweet and just beautiful.

E A R T H - Tbh… It was kind of weird seeing the paladins on earth defending and joining the Garrison. Don’t get me wrong though! It was pretty good. My friend called it when the general was working with Sendak and I kind of screamed because I didn’t expect her to be right. The Katie and Colleen hug was so sweet and ‘Uncle Lance’ killed me. AND VERONICA… SO FRICKIN COOL. The Voltron crew did an exceptional job with her character! But it did kind of killed me a little to see Earth already fallen and having the paladins jumping into something so big. I kind of wished they got a break seeing how earlier in this season, they went through hell. Getting lost in space and dealing with so many battles was just so tiring for them (and me lmao). But I really hope things will calm down the next season (I mean it probably won’t because it is the last season with the altean and everything)

K E I T H - I never liked Keith Kogane that much and a lot of my irl and online friends know this (but I totally don’t hate his stans nor his VA. I also don’t hate the Voltron crew for how they have written him. Love them all, I just don’t like Keith Kogane, the Voltron character.) I remember in 80s Voltron, it mostly specialized on Keith and I was hoping that it wouldn’t be the same formula for this one. This season and some other seasons have specialized on Keith. I mean, It was fine I guess, but I just thought to point out how it really just looked on him. I mean of course there was Hunk, but that was like a mini thing with Keith being the main dish. What do you guys think about this? Do you think it is good that Keith is the main character in these plots?

Ok… I don’t really want to dive in on this topic…. Ships. I mean…. it kind of is way too touchy right now. And my Plance heart kind of died at the end. And a ship I don’t necessarilly agree with happened ( well sort of happened ). And by don’t agree, I don’t mean I hate it. I don’t ship hate, I’m just expressing my opinion in a calm manner. I really hope people don’t get offended. But moving on from Lance ships…..

Keith ships kind of surprised me. So many people thought Keith was gay but I guess that is not the case. Well actually…. he didn’t show any sure fire signs of Acxa so….. nvm on that. And Zethrid and Ezor were the only ones that talked about it. Acxa didn’t even give any input or show any reaction towards it. Tbh I thought the only reason Acxa would support Keith would be because Keith saved her life at Lotor’s crowning. I would have never suspected she would actually like him as a human being. So many people also thought Kallura was happening, but at this point, I’m so lost.

Hunk and Romelle. I thought it was cute as hell. Never really saw it being cannon, but if it did, I would support. I always thought Hunk and Shay would be together seeing how they bonded so much in earlier seasons. I’m glad she came back to him and is now on Earth. I guess Season 8 will finally give us answers on who’s gonna be who.

Alright this post was so damn long. Took me about 30 min to write it ahaha. If you have made it this far, thank you for listening to what I have to say. And in case anyone is still thinking this, I am not hating on the season or the ships hinted. This is all just my opinon and if you disagree, that is totally fun. I would love to all talk about this peacefully. I want to know what you guys think about this season! See ya later Paladudes.

#voltron #Voltron spoilers season 7 #voltron spoilers #keith kogane #lance mcclain #pidge gunderson #allura #coran #lotor

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wheretogofrmhere · 6 years

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To the one anon I wasn’t trying to attack you personally or offend you & I’m sry if I did! Maybe this one situation was different, but it still applies in most other situations. There’s lots of fans that go looking for proofs (& yes that includes fans who are happy or frustrated by it). But then these happy fans run to other accounts & share immediately because they thrive off the drama & arguments it can cause. It’s not just because they’re happy about their ship. They thrive on drama

listen, i rEALLY wish yall could see my inbox the second anyone even mentions her name on here or there is a whisper of them hanging out. 9/10 of them are fans who dont like them together or dont think they are together, trying with EVERYTHING to disprove or argue every angle. its exhausting. so i get that others want to kinda find proof to help dispel the negativity and shut ppl up.

and i really really do not like the fact that those that are happy/supportive about them being together and want to talk about it, are considered to be “creating drama” by doing so. the only ppl who consider it ~drama or anyone being extra, are those that dont like to see or hear about it. otherwise, just discussing it, its not us being dramatic lol and again, i get more ppl coming to ME, to argue every single thing about niall and her then i do ppl just wanting to happily talk about it. i literally dont even post the negative shit anymore. i just delete and block. i should start screenshotting tho so yall can see the kind of hate (yes ppl actually harass ME personally bc of them) and bullshit i get. its insane.

all bc niall is dating someone lol

#thats nice of you to apologize tho!!!#and i do get what you mean #i see it on both sides but its def more so those who want to try and find an angle to argue #Anonymous

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shababyj · 6 years

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Suicide…The act of ending one’s own life. Such a strange and selfish thing to do on one hand but on the other, who the fuck ever cared in the first place to even make you consider the alternative??? Such a dark and gray area for some people to go, yet some of us live in a constant state of dying alive every-single-day.

Most people often wonder what was going through their mind or what could have been so bad that they had to end it all? Did YOU bother to ask them how THEY were doing? Every time they seemed off or distant, did you ask them if they wanted to go somewhere and talk? Were You really paying attention?

It is never the world’s responsibility to bring you out of your dark black hole and save you. But it helps to have people in your circle have some understanding and knowledge of what mental illness looks like. It’s not always textbook with everyone or like it is in the movies. I think people are being misled by the media on what REALLY happens when you are hit with this disease.

There are so many mental illnesses that lead to suicidal thought and some end in death by suicide or even murder. I know right…scary huh? But it’s the truth! Most of the time people are so engulfed in their own pain that they don’t realize someone else’s pain. But for the most part, that is not the case. Many people are ignored and told to go to a doctor, get some medicine, have a drink, learn to relax, and the most famous of all, just deal with it. Kinda fucked up, ain’t it!

Some people, like myself, deal with people who claim to be victimized but it’s for pity. They find people who make them look better, make them look superior in a way, and then stomp all over their lives one small fraction at a time. It’s no illness but it is sick. They have several different types of a narcissist and most will play the victim card all the while they are abusing the shit out of you. It’s not treatable and it can be corrected only if the person themselves wanted to do so, but they love to cause pain, so they remain the pieces of shit they are. Be aware they claim the victim card all the while they themselves are indeed the abuser. (NOTE: They will only threaten suicide for attention and pity but would never kill themselves because they hold themselves above all other…only they matter)

Depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, bipolar, postpartum depression, trauma, ADHD, schizophrenia, and many others are main causes of suicide. Today, there are many children and teens committing more suicides than adults. It breaks my heart to know that so many young kids decided not to fight another day. I wish I could have saved them all. 😦 Sometimes I wonder if I am ever going to be able to save myself but I keep pushing through all the hell and fire that gets thrown my way.

It seems every single time a celebrity commits suicide, the world notices the sickness that’s spreading. It’s as if it’s contagious in areas where people have more money and fame than they can ask for. But is it all worth it? Sometimes we only see what people want us to see and we forget to ask about the other half we don’t out of fear. The world has been so offended by every damn thing, that even people can’t ask each other if they’re okay without getting offended. You don’t need to know all the details but make sure people know you are there and make sure you damn-well mean it!

Mental pain is brutal, gut-wrenching, and soul-sucking, breaking you down little by little into a person you won’t even recognize. You become edgy and angry at times but other times sad and guilt-stricken. It plagues you with thoughts and emotions that tear away at you piece by piece. You become who the illness creates and feeds; no longer the human you once were.

The sharpness of the pain is suffocating, intoxicating, and makes it hard to breathe. At points in time, it overtakes every ounce of your thoughts and consumes even the greatest parts of your better days. You are manic from the suffering and trying to run away or paranoid with all the voices in your head and they are the only ones who stay. Maybe your eyes are swollen shut from all the pain that melted away only for new hurt to surround you and bring you down once more. Maybe you just can’t escape your own hell.

Suicide to a sick mind and broken soul is a way out for them. An escape to remove the burden they carry and all the baggage they drag around. Coming from personal experience, family and some of your closest friends are often the first to shut you up and turn you away when you need them most. It’s not a secret, but they claim to be tired of hearing about the same shit all the time. But have they ever put themselves in your shoes? Have you ever felt what I felt? Those are questions our people…OUR PEOPLE… need to ask themselves. How would you feel if the roles were reversed???

When no one else will listen to a sick person, they often isolate and disassociate with life and the things they used to enjoy. Happiness doesn’t come by all that often so solitude and disconnect is often the next step. Many times you will still see the laughter here and there but it won’t be the same as before. Hurt people tend to replace joy with other habits such as sleeping a lot, staying locked away from others, not going out with friends, drugs, smoking, and alcohol. Some even form an eating habit.

When all else fails and you have nothing left to pull you out of the darkness because all your cries for help faltered; you succumb to your own self-destruction. You might start cutting yourself (my specialty once) to relieve the emotional pain through physical drainage. It brings relief for a time and leaves a scar that tells your stories painful truth. You might even start to starve yourself thinking it will starve the pain, or feed it and binge feed every single ache and then some may even make themselves vomit. There are so many ways that people deal with pain and it only leads to other illnesses.

At last, no one hears your cries or bothered to help you in your time of need. Hell, maybe some didn’t even believe your pain was real. Some thought it was fake or made up and some thought you were strong enough to handle it. The fact is at some point, every single one of us breaks. We shatter like glass and we struggle like hell if we have to pick up all the pieces…especially alone. How overwhelming for a sick person, right? It becomes too much and they only see the shattered pieces and make a decision to end it all.

No one just decides they want to die just because. No one knows the pain of another but with some strong understanding of human life and the way the mind work, you can potentially save a life. These people are broken individuals that lack something and are tired of pain. Meanwhile, you are parading all the joy you have in your life in front their faces while they are just asking for your time and understanding. Now time is up and you were never there and they are devastated that they have to turn to the only thing that ends it all…the bullet, the knife, the razor blade, the rope, the pills…and most of the time those things are always available and always work correctly in their favor.

There is no coming back from the dead. Someone is suffering in your life and I promise you, even if you think you know them well, they have thought about ending themselves. It’s not uncommon for even the happiest person on a bad day to think about suicide. Sometimes there are no warning signs and we have to pay attention to our people, especially our children and teens. At some point and time, we will all have the blues but not everyone will fall victim to a serious mental illness.

Most men don’t express their feelings well and they are left behind when it comes to suicide prevention. We need to let the men in our lives know that they don’t always have to be the strong one, the tough guy and the rock for everyone. They can break down and cry and have moments of weakness whenever it may be. They are entitled to be an emotional wreck just like us women. It’s okay to be a man and be tough and still know that when it hurts, it hurts, and its okay to express it.

The big thing we fail women on is postpartum depression. I think more a lot of women, that’s where the illness began. We are shamed as fat, not losing enough weight after birth, not having enough energy, not keeping ourselves up, not being the once amazing lover, not having time to do work, not being the good enough mother and wife, and we are exhausted. Someone is always criticizing bottle feeding, breastfeeding, cloth diapers, disposable diapers, pacifiers, and co-sleeping and all that bullshit. Fuck what you and everybody else thinks. So what if your husband’s mother wants this or your mom wants that and his or her sisters thinks that’s not good enough….FUCK THEM ALL!!! You are the momma and that baby is you and your husbands…do it yall way!!!!

The intimidation is causing more women after childbirth to stay in this depression longer than the typical postpardum time. It’s ridiculous that people have to throw so much bullshit at a new mom or dad for that matter. It breaks you down when you need your strength the most. It continues a destructive path because of hormones imbalances and lack of sleep and major life changes. Mothers are ending their life when their children need them most and I believe it all started in this very personally important period. Selfish? Maybe but its all personal opinion.

Photo by NIKOLAY OSMACHKO on Pexels.com

I think we all should help each other in our most vulnerable moments. A hug or a simple talk would most likely help anyone. For the new mom or dad, a new coffee maker or a night out would help. For the person who is being bullied, don’t justify the bully and disable the victim (see narcissism). Always know that someone you run into every single day is tired of living and is waiting for someone to give them some kind of hope. Be paying close attention.

I am 36 years old and I suffer from ADD-ADHD combined type and OCD. I have been diagnosed with manic depression before, now called Bipolar depression, but I am better than I used to be. I have anxiety brought on by my ADHD but on medicine, it is a lot better and manageable. I have PTSD brought on by the trauma of my daughter’s heart defect diagnoses and the events to follow. The thought of facing losing your child is unbearable and seeing what she went through was very traumatic for me. The worst part of it was I was still in the postpartum period even when she had her open heart surgery, which was the most debilitating and painful place in my life I have ever been. I am the victim of narcissist abuse. My husband, myself and my daughter are all victims of these people’s selfishness and even once we are free, damage remains done. But they always lose because playing the victim as a bully for so long only gets you found out about. Keep on playing the games while I keep on laughing and moving forward with my family.

Suicide: Are You Dying Enough Yet? Suicide...The act of ending one's own life. Such a strange and selfish thing to do on one hand but on the other, who the fuck ever cared in the first place to even make you consider the alternative???

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papirouge · 4 years

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Just saw a post calling out Leonardo di Caprio and his obsession with dating women young enough to be his own damn daughters and -as expected- you had creeps whining "UGH JUST MIND YOUR BUSINESS!! HOW DARE YOU COMMENTING PPL'S PRIVATE LIFE!! STOP INFANTILIZING GROWN WOMEN" (and let's no forget the sugar babygirls with blatant daddy issues saying stuff like "I would date someone the age of my dad, so what?" 💅🏻🤡 smh) and it got me thinking: that's.not.the.actual.point? 🤔

Freedom ≠ Morality

People are just so obsessed with freedom they can't possibly think that stuff they're legally allowed to do ain't morally right or flat out (psychologically) damaging.

In my country, my grown adult self could legally have sex with a 14 y.o kid but it would never cross my mind because I'm a normal human being. And yet, you have literally white collars fapping on CHILDREN getting raped on Pornhub because that's legal. See this issue?

Freedom is an open gate to dehumanization.

I can't possibly think about a functioning society where were not allowed to question people and their life choices because it's legal. All our life long we're being corrected for behaving in a way that might damage people regardless of legalism.

Idk what anyone think : middle-aged men obsessively grooming & dating barely legal women ARE creepy, and this type of relationship inherently and objectively unbalanced. Anyone being butthurt mad by this statement need to check themselves and ask why they feel so offended.

It's not infantilizing : people's brain doesn't stop growing up until 26 y.o - at 22 y.o you're still clueless about much more things you actually think of. The maturity and biologic dynamic of dating someone the age of your dad is absolutely flawed (imagine making a child with a middle-aged man who'll be 60+ y.o when your kid hits uni...).

I wish more people would be more conscious that the aim of those old men dating young girls is their emotional vulnerability and relative inexperience that make molding them as they want much easier. I remember that Tumblr post with kids from couples with huge age gap telling how messed up their parents' relationship was. There was one whose father literally molded their mom he married when she was like...16 and him in his late twenties/early 30s, to be a submissive housewife relying on him for any decision BECAUSE she got married so young she didn't get the proper time to develop her own personality before dating him...

IDC what any man can argue about it. Yall ain't slick. You being so butthurt angry against mature women calling you out on your sh*t SHOWS. Stop hiding behind your freedom because we all know those laws you're desperately relying on are written by equally morally & sexually corrupted men as you.

Yall of the same brood of vipers.

#papi truths

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basicallybing · 7 years

Text

Get to Know Me (Tag)

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag some friends.

Thanks for tagging me, @steve-rogers-best-girl :)

LAST:

1. drink: water

2. phone call: my dad

3. text message: my dad

4. song you listened to: i think Holding On To You by twenty one pilots

5. time you cried: a couple hours ago

HAVE YOU:

6. dated someone twice: lol joke’s on you i haven’t even dated someone once ha. ha. ha. ugh.

7. kissed someone and regretted it: i haven’t ever kissed someone at all lol what are these questions

8. been cheated on: in a competitive game of pokemon maybe but yall i havent dated what is happening

9. lost someone special: i mean i once had a toxic friend and i super duper got rid of her i guess but like thats it

10. been depressed: never been diagnosed but im pretty sure i’ve had depression since around third grade (but that’s a story for another time)

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: ew???? i’ve never even drank alcohol why am i answering these questions ew

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:

12. white

13. various blues and teals

14. golden yellow

IN THE LAST YEAR, HAVE YOU:

15. made new friends: yep!

16. fallen out of love: platonically with a toxic-as-heck friend yeah

17. laughed until you cried: absolutely!

18. found out someone was talking about you: yep

19. uhh ya skipped 19 so idk what to put here lol

20. found out who your friends are: yeah

21. kissed someone on your facebook list: sErIoUsLy? *face palm*

GENERAL:

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl? i dont have a facebook

23. do you have any pets? yep, a doggo!

24. do you want to change your name? y e s p l e a s e ! ! ! ! !

25. what did you do for your last birthday? had some of muh frens over

26. what time do you wake up? for school at like 5:30, but over the summer i’ve been waking up around 9ish

27. what were you doing at midnight last night? crying

28. name something you can’t wait for: a month ago i would have said Pokemon Go Fest but nope i got my hopes up for that like usual and of course i cant go uh i cant wait to get a desk finally i dont have a desk *shrug*

29. when was the last time you saw your mom? *shouts down the hall* “hi mom!”

30. what is one thing you wish you could change in your life? i’d like a whole new wardrobe that magically made me look thinner and happier all the time and that allowed strangers to see me for me and not me for some slouch who wears sweatpants all the time bc i dont have any other clothes that dont cripple me with dysphoria lmao woot woot

31. what are you listening to right now? primarily Regional at Best by twenty one pilots bc its calming for me

32. have you ever talked to a person named tom? actually??? im not sure...?? i’ve definitely talked to a few thomas-es but none of them go by tom *shrug*

33. something that is getting on your nerves: when my mom says we can’t afford to buy me a desk but then she goes out and buys other decor for the house

34. most visited website: probably youtube, netflix, instagram, and tumblr if you include the use of apps

35. any moles? nope

36. any birthmarks? none of which i’m aware

37. childhood dream: not sure. i always wanted to be a superhero like spider-man and whatnot i guess.

38. hair color? brown

39. hair length? short

40. do you have a crush? do fictional characters count? if so, yes -- peter parker, ben wyatt, and chandler bing

41. what do you like about yourself? i’m nice.

42. any piercings? just the basic earlobe piercings, but i never wear anything in them. i’m surprised theyre still open.

43. blood type? crap i need to ask my mom about this. it’s good to know for safety reasons.

44. any nicknames? anything you know me as on here is technically a nickname because i go by my birthname everywhere else... sooo, yeah. chandler is a nickname. i also get addressed as ‘???’ and as ‘Q,’ which is just short for “question marks” bc idk what my name should be but yep i go by chandler for now i guess *shrug*

45. relationship status: jealous

46. zodiac: aries

47. pronouns: they/them are preferable but i never correct people if they use anything else bc i’m just so accustomed to my own confusion

48. favorite tv show: agh i guess Parks and Rec is my number-one, but i also love Friends, The Good Place, Agents of SHIELD, Daredevil, and Legion (which cRaP i need to finish watching)

49. uh yeah i think you skipped this one too

50. righty or lefty? righty

51. any surgeries? nope

52. ever dye your hair? I WISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

53. favorite sport? to play? basketball. to watch? football. although if my family was more into hockey i bet i’d love that.

54. hgfdskgfskjfhskjf you skipped this one too

55. dream vacation? honestly, i don’t care where we go as long as it’s somewhere out of the country and i get to travel with my friends in an evan edinger sorta way, you know?

56. favorite pair of sneakers? i mean?? i only have the one... it’s a nike hyperdunk i think? like, an older one? idk theyre comfy

57. eating: nothing right now...

58. drinking: i mean i have water next to me so like i guess water is my answer

59. about to: hurry the heck up and finish answering these questions lmao

60. you skipped it

61. ........

62. want: to travel and to be happy

63. ever going to get married? if i do, it won’t be a huge ceremony. it won’t be religious. and it will have to be to somebody very, very special to me.

64. career: i’m a student right now

65. hugs or kisses? if i have to choose, hugs, but please don’t hug me without asking and dont be offended if i say no. i’m really uncomfortable about physical contact.

66. lips or eyes? eyes 1000000%

67. tall or short? i’m short.

68. older or younger? what’s this question...? im confused and don’t know how to answer it tbh

69. there’s no question here

70. nice arms or nice stomach? me? neither lol im Ugly

71. sensitive or loud? if you’re close with me, you’re the lucky people who know i’m both

72. hook up or relationship? EW DEFINITELY RELATIONSHIP IM SO ASEXUAL

73. troublemaker or hesitant? this makes it sound like it’s bad to not be a troublemaker. i’m not a troublemaker but its not because im hesitant. it’s because im a good person. and i dont mean to imply that troublemakers arent good people, but im not either of those things...???

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. kissed a stranger? i h a v e n e v e r k i s s e d a n y o n e .

75. drank hard liquor? i a m u n d e r a g e .

76. lost glasses or contact lenses? no, but i’ve broken my glasses before

77. turned someone down? unless you include that time that i was asked out as a dare, no.

78. had sex on the first date? i h a v e n e v e r b e e n o n a d a t e a n d i a m a s e x u a l .

79. broken someone’s heart? not that i’m aware of

80. had your heart broken? yeah, by that Toxic Person who i mention all the time. it wasnt a romantic thing but i hate that person with a burning passion i cannot even bEGIN to tell you

81. been arrested? no definitely not

82. cried when someone died? in real life? . . . no. no one close to me has died. but i have cried at fictional deaths

83. fallen for a friend? kind of but not really idk its complicated and not worth it

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. yourself? on good days

85. miracles? not unless by “mircales” you mean “coincidences”

86. love at first sight? not for myself, but maybe for someone who is more into looks. and i dont mean that negatively but like thats just not really my kinds thing necessarily.

87. santa claus? well considering i was raised jewish but am currently atheist imma have to say no

88. kissing on the first date? i’ve never been able to experience what kissing or dating is like but if it feels right for someone then i have nothing against it

OTHER:

90. current best friend names: katie, claire, lizzie (i tag posts with their names when stuff reminds me of them hehe)

91. eye color? brown

92. favorite movie? i loved that new Spider-Man: Homecoming film, but Guardians of the Galaxy has always been one of my go-to movies, so probably GOTG

i tag anyone who wants to do this bc frankly im lazy and dont feel like tagging anyone heh lol

#mine #tag meme #me

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sugas-kookies · 7 years

Text

Get To Know Me Tag

Helloooo, I was tagged by the wonderful @tumblingtae . Thanks for tagging me~ (≧▽≦) For this, I’ll go ahead and tag: @milo-gin @stuck-between-biases @ace-sofaraway @baxngtan (yall are like the only people I really talk to lmao)

THE LAST: 1. DRINK: Dr. Pepper 2. PHONE CALL: Uhhhh I never fuckin call ppl cause of my anxiety so....idk maybe my mom? No wait it was my father cause he was out of town this week. 3. TEXT MESSAGE: We can buy a Lambo with our combined money (in reference to GTA V) 4. SONG YOU LISTENED TO: Blurry by Puddle of Mudd 5. TIME YOU CRIED: From sadness? It’s been a long time. I cried with laughter last night tho cause of my dad HAVE YOU: 6. DATED SOMEONE TWICE: lmaooooo I’ve never dated 7. KISSED SOMEONE AND REGRETTED IT: never kissed 8. BEEN CHEATED ON: nope 9. LOST SOMEONE SPECIAL: yeah of course 10. BEEN DEPRESSED: yes I have been 11. GOTTEN DRUNK AND THROWN UP: I’ve had like a sip of wine, but I refuse to drink beyond that

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 12. Black 13. Purple 14. Pastel pink IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. MADE NEW FRIENDS: Yep, you kinda have to going into college. 16. FALLEN OUT OF LOVE: don’t think I’ve ever been in love (unless you count my love for BTS lmao) 17. LAUGHED UNTIL YOU CRIED: all the time haha 18. FOUND OUT SOMEONE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU: I mean it’s bound to happen. It doesn’t surprise me tho not a lot of ppl like me 19. MET SOMEONE WHO CHANGED YOU: Not sure about the past year....maybe one of my roommates. 20. FOUND OUT WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE: Yep 21. KISSED SOMEONE ON YOUR FACEBOOK LIST: havent kissed anyone GENERAL: 22. HOW MANY OF YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS DO YOU KNOW IN REAL LIFE: Most, but not all 23. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS: Yes, a small little dog named Sophie who’s a little shit :) 24. DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME: Y E S. EVERYONE IN THE US HAS MY FUCKIN NAME 25. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY: hung out with my college friends, ate at Chili’s 26. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP: 10:30 AM lmao 27. WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT: Managing one of my other blogs on tumblr 28. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN’T WAIT FOR: moving out of my parents house so I can fuckin live my life 29. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM: last night. My parents are gone today 30. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WISH YOU COULD CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE: Not being such an anxious piece of shit 31. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING RIGHT NOW: the gentle hum of my computer 32. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO A PERSON NAMED TOM: maybe? idk 33. SOMETHING THAT IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES: people being hypocritical or just being bitchy or no reason 34. MOST VISITED WEBSITE: tumblr and youtube...sometimes a03 LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME 35. MOLE/S: don’t really have any, just freckles 36. MARK/S: freckles everywhere. And some scars too lol 37. CHILDHOOD DREAM: To be a teacher actually. 38. HAIR COLOR: Blonde 39. LONG OR SHORT HAIR: short cause I’m too lazy to style long hair 40. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE: not unless Suga counts 41. WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF: not much, uhhhhhhh....I guess that it’s really hard to offend me? 42. PIERCINGS: double lobe piercings in both ears. I plan to get more soon 43. BLOOD TYPE: idk. I have no idea. I’ve asked my mother and she doesn’t know. I’m like “What if i’m dying and they ask u mom?” Her: “Well I guess you’ll just die, Em.” 44. NICKNAME: Spice, Em, Emi (only my brother calls me this one so) 45. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: super single 46. ZODIAC: Aries 47. PRONOUNS: she/her 48. FAVORITE TV SHOW: I never watch TV, but I do like Face Off (the show not the shitty movie) 49. TATTOOS: None yet, I plan to have some in the future 50. RIGHT OR LEFT HAND: right 51. SURGERY: none 52. HAIR DYED IN DIFFERENT COLOR: I’ve had it brown and dark red, but currently it’s just a lighter blonde than my natural color. 53. SPORT: fuck sports 55. VACATION: none as of right now 56. PAIR OF TRAINERS: trainers...? Like shoes??? Usually converse or knock off Vans MORE GENERAL: 57. EATING: nothing 58. DRINKING: nothing 59. I’M ABOUT TO: work on another post for this blog 61. WAITING FOR: my will to write to return from the war 62. WANT: to stop being bored 63. GET MARRIED: I’d like to in the future 64. CAREER: Like to have my own graphic design business

WHICH IS BETTER 65. HUGS OR KISSES: hugs 66. LIPS OR EYES: eyes, even though I’m scared of looking at ppl 67. SHORTER OR TALLER: taller 68. OLDER OR YOUNGER: older 70. NICE ARMS OR NICE STOMACH: ARMS FOR SURE 71. SENSITIVE OR LOUD: sensitive since I have the emotional range of a teaspoon 72. HOOK UP OR RELATIONSHIP: relationship, I’m too awkward

73. TROUBLEMAKER OR HESITANT: troublemaker, my anxiety will make up the hesitation for both of us

HAVE YOU EVER: 74. KISSED A STRANGER: No 75. DRANK HARD LIQUOR: no just wine 76. LOST GLASSES/CONTACT LENSES: nope I always wear glasses 77. TURNED SOMEONE DOWN: yes like two guys and a girl 78. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE: im a pure soul 79. BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART: probably? 80. HAD YOUR HEART BROKEN: from movies/shows, or by “friends” 81. BEEN ARRESTED: No but I’ve done some shit that should have at least gotten me a ticket 82. CRIED WHEN SOMEONE DIED: I only cried when my first dog died 83. FALLEN FOR A FRIEND: kinda but not really DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. YOURSELF: hahaha hell no 85. MIRACLES: sometimes ppl get lucky, wouldn’t call them miracles 86. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: more like lust or infatuation 87. SANTA CLAUS: Nope 88. KISS ON THE FIRST DATE: no, I’ve went on one date once, that would have been awkward 89. ANGELS: no, I’m not religious

OTHER: 91. EYE COLOR: blue 92. FAVORITE MOVIE: Grave of the fireflies or maybe We Need To Talk About Kevin? There’s too many come talk movie shit with me guys

#spice talks #tag

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astro-child · 7 years

Text

only fools fall for you (I’m a fool)

pairing: jikook

rating: nc16

genre: soulmate au, angst & fluff, implied smut

a/n: for day 7 of #jikook fluff week <3 combining the name tattoo au with this song & post! yall might wanna grab a fluffy bolster/stuffed toy to hug :^))) ahh I’m not even sure this came out coherent omg anyway, comments and notes are very much appreciated u ____ u please enjoy~

summary: “Those who pretend as if they don’t love you,

are the ones who would hate to see you love another person.”

jimin is Nameless. it's part of the reason why jungkook had broken his own heart and pushed his soulmate away.

in the 21st century, everyone is born with their soulmate's name inscribed on the inside of their left wrist, except the Nameless. they were randomly chosen by the deities to be the only people who were free to roam, to search for The One, matching everyone else up ruthlessly.

jungkook always thought of it as a curse. his parents were nameless, too, and they used to tell him about how lucky he was to have a soulmate, to look down and know that someone out there loves you.

park jimin. he stares at the name scribbled on his wrist, then looks up to see said boy falling over namjoon, giggling, wondering if he’d committed a great sin in his past life, to be punished like this.

I. Everyday, every word that I say, lip service

jungkook tries his best not to get attached. it’s a hard task with someone like jimin, who cuddles him wherever and whenever he likes, ruffles his hair fondly each time he does something praise-worthy, smiles at him like jungkook was his entire world, stole kisses to his nape and cheeks.

he succeeds most of the time, pushes back the blush rising in his face, swallows his smile, ache blooming in his chest as the older’s face falls and he pulls away, defeated, stops his fingers from reaching out to curl around jimin’s wrist.

it’s always a mistake when he does let go, returns jimin’s affection with too much fervor, coming off too eager, too needy for attention. he tells jimin he’s cute (so. goddamn. cute), brushes his lips across the crown of the older’s forehead, stomach knotting in happiness as jimin’s face contorts into a beautifully bright smile, then regrets it right after, becoming greedy, wanting more.

“no, you’re beautiful,” the words slip from his mouth subconsciously as he watches jimin grumble to himself about how much he’s lacking.

the whisper shocks the older, and he spins around so fast he almost gets a whiplash, face crumpling with shame and embarrassment, but jungkook thinks he’s always handsome. “why are you here, jungkook-ah? it's late,” he replies, faking a smile, attempting to change the topic.

“recording a cover,” he smiles back, but it barely reaches his eyes. “I’ll...I’ll go now.”

on the way out, he hears jimin talking to himself, softer than before but still audible, frowning as he tries to perfect the angle of his jump step.

“if you don't do this properly nobody will like you,” the older rasps, and jungkook’s probably taking too long to leave the studio, but he spins around anyway.

he keeps his eyes on the ground. “you're perfect to me.” he makes the mistake of glancing up, eyes locking with jimin’s warm ones, unable to look away.

“everything I’ve ever wanted.” he continues, breathlessly, nervously thumbing at the loose strand of thread hanging down from his tank. he knows he should stop, too much truth in his words for jimin not to know, so when jimin takes a gut-wrenching step towards him, he backs out like the coward he is, running all the way back to the dorms and into the shower, panting heavily, mind reeling with regret.

II. Can't hide my fears, I tried but I'm in ruins

it happens during one of their osaka fan events, his biggest fear.

he remembers, just how his heart had jumped into his throat before crashing down hard, into the pit of his stomach as jimin’s legs buckled and his body crumpled before jungkook’s eyes.

it takes one two, no, three seconds for jungkook to realise that the scream resonating through the arena belongs to him.

he’s by jimin’s side in a flash, cupping the older’s pale face in his hands, berating himself for not having pointed out the ghostly color of the older’s lips before.

there are tears welling up in his eyes as the medic staff take jimin away, wanting so much to follow them down and off the stage, forget about the performance entirely, but namjoon has a deathly grip on his shoulders. “we have to finish the performance, kook,” he repeats, over and over and over again, and jungkook’s shoulders shake.

he messes up in three routines and his voice is shaky, hoarse as he takes over jimin’s parts, straining from overuse in another two, unable to focus. he can't do this.

somehow, they manage to end the event successfully, and jungkook bolts off the stage in record time, not caring about anything else. he bursts into the room, breath coming out in harsh, short pants, making a strangled noise in the back of his throat as he watches jimin lie lifelessly on the bed, connected to an iv drip, forehead patched up.

he steps into the room in a daze, heart squeezing and tightening uncomfortably, wishing he could be in jimin’s place.

his tattoo burns from where it rests on his arm. gently twining their fingers together, he waits late into the night, and then finally, after what feels like an eternity, jimin’s hand twitches in his hold.

slowly, the older cracks an eye open, sleepy from the relaxation pill and jungkook exhales in relief. “jungkookie?” he croaks, smiling stupidly.

jungkook has half a mind to reach up and kiss him silly. “don't you ever, ever do that again, park jimin,” he warns, voice tight and jimin giggles softly, bringing their hands to his chest. “m’kay, jungkookie.”

III. I could sit and lie to you, but what's the point? What's the use?

“you like jimin,” yoongi says, with an accusatory tone but jungkook knows better. his hyung would never do that to him. he pretends to not hear the sentence, turning up the volume of the music blasting through his earphones.

the older rips them out of his ears. he winces, looking over with a scandalized look and yoongi decides he’s had enough, tightly grasping jungkook’s wrist to pull it towards him.

jungkook knows what it says, has been staring at those two words neatly imprinted on his skin from the time he was born.

yoongi drops his arm promptly, gaze boring into jungkook’s. “you never told me—any of us. we would have helped.”

jungkook shrugs, doesn't even bother denying because yoongi knows, he always does. understands things better, faster, easier than anyone else in the group. “didn't think there was a chance.”

the older guffaws in disbelief. “so you were just going to give him up?” he states plainly, and jungkook’s almost offended at his tone.

“it's not like I want to, but he's park jimin. the guy who big dogs, small dogs, big humans, small humans, guys and girls all like? it's already pretty much impossible to get a Nameless to fall in love with you, much less a Nameless with a friendly, big-hearted personality like him.”

yoongi doesn't argue, and although jungkook’s won the argument, there's a heavy feeling weighing down his heart.

IV. You can see I'm blind for you

jungkook had always liked photography, thought that it was a nice idea, to be able to keep something with you forever.

he’d started the very year he’d joined bangtan, after a fan had gifted him with a DSLR camera for his fifteenth birthday, taking pictures of dogs, places, food and the other trainees.

but then one day, he’d been testing out focus shots during his break between vocal and dance lessons when he heard a loud bass beat ringing through the studio. that's odd, he thinks, peering through the window and oh.

there's a boy dancing his heart out in the middle of the room, bangs matted to his forehead, determination in his eyes. he looks a bit older than jungkook, more mature, but he’s small, only a few centimeters taller.

he’s so intrigued he almost forgets to breathe.

and then, subconsciously, jungkook reaches for his camera to take a picture, forgetting about the shutter.

the noise startles said boy and he stops mid-spin to meet jungkook’s eyes. for a moment, jungkook believes he's going to stalk over and make him delete the picture, just like some of the other trainees do, but the boy’s stoic expression cracks into a breathtaking smile and he beckons jungkook over.

“I heard about you!” he gushes, thick accent bleeding out, eyes sparkling and jungkook feels like he’s home. “you're the youngest trainee here, and the first dancer to join. it's nice to meet you.”

his wrist tingles but jungkook brushes the feeling away quickly, returning a shy smile. and that's how it all started.

V. You break the rules

“do you love dad?” he remembers asking his mother, holding her hand. his mother smiles, bringing the back of his hand up to kiss it. “of course, darling,” she whispers. “your soulmate will love you no matter what you do, or how you meet. it just happens.”

he wishes he were back home in busan, to tell his mom about how wrong she was.

instead, here he is, sitting on the cold hard floor of the track, watching as jimin fools around with literally everybody in the goddamn universe but him.

he hates chanyeol the most, really.

he hates how he can bravely reach for jimin’s hand to tangle their fingers together, pulling the older along the entire track, laughing carelessly, wishes he could do that too. he hates how chanyeol is tall, taller than him, and drapes over jimin in a perfect fit that has fans cooing and cheering. he hates how chanyeol doesn't have a name on his wrist either, but stares at jimin so fondly people might think they were soulmates.

jimin was his soulmate. shouldn't there be some kind of a bro code that the older was off-limits or something? christ, he’s so selfish.

chanyeol tips jimin’s chin up with a finger playfully, bringing their faces closer, eyes filled with so much adoration and puppy love that jungkook’s stomach flips uncomfortably and he physically has to force himself to look away, hurt and jealousy spreading like hot flames throughout his body.

(he doesn't see how jimin catches sight of him through the corner of his eye and immediately retracts, worrying at his bottom lip as he scurries over apologetically, remembering to keep his distance and give jungkook space, but still there.)

((he does jolt up in shock though, when lean, strong arms wrap around his waist and jimin buries his face into his neck, nosing at the jut of his clavicle. his body responds right away, freezing up, goosebumps rising on his skin, heart skittering impossibly fast in his chest, pink flush blooming on his cheeks.

but he's still angry, and jungkook's pretty damn good at keeping grudges, so he pulls away like he’s been burned, walking away without turning back.))

(((it’s not like he's expecting jimin to love him per se, with how affectionate he acts towards everybody, not just jungkook, but it's not like he wants jimin to hate him either. jungkook is a selfish, selfish man.)))

VI. And I'm the fool who wants you badly

he’s probably taken over five thousand pictures of jimin at this rate.

“you two are so cute it's disgusting,” yoongi says over his phone, sipping quietly at his iced coffee. jungkook shushes him immediately, snapping shots right and left of jimin and taehyung playing in the snow.

he smiles as he gets a picture of jimin falling over in laughter, eyes disappearing into crescents.

“have you ever gone through your hard disk?” namjoon teases and jungkook glares at him. of course he has. heck, he probably takes better pictures of jimin than those who go oppa~ and look here~ at fan events.

(he finds himself taking another picture on the way home from their afternoon schedules, jimin’s head rested on his shoulder, illuminated by the light shining in from the car windows.)

((it later becomes one of their most popular tweets, so much so that their manager had warned him to be more careful about his image.

jimin, on the other hand, had only bounced up to him with the brightest beam on his face, slinging an arm carelessly around his shoulder. “is that how pretty I look in your eyes?”))

(((“was jimin always this ethereal? ㅋㅋㅋㅋ” hoseok texts, spamming their group chat, and jungkook nods shyly to himself from the safety of his bed.

“I always thought he was.”)))

VII. No matter what you do

“you...you're really sure about this?” namjoon says in hushed whispers, shell-shocked and jungkook shrinks into his hoodie more, nodding. “it’s not three days, kook. it’s three months.”

he swallows, heart in his throat. “I need the break.”

namjoon nods, slowly, brows furrowed, clearly upset. tension fills the air and a blanket of awkwardness settles between them, the older’s unanswered questions buzzing so loudly jungkook can hear it without it being voiced. “because of jimin?” he finally blurts and jungkook shuts his eyes, nails digging into his palms, more reluctant this time as he mumbles out a yes.

the older shoots him one last affirmative look, to which he returns. “I’ll tell manager-hyung.”

the word about his trip spreads rather quickly, almost all of the members shooting him sad looks and laying a comforting hand on his shoulder a few days after, the only exception being jimin.

he's been rather good at avoiding the older lately, darting off in the wrong direction upon spotting jimin, coming back to the dorms in the wee hours of the night, way past jimin's sleeping time. if he remembers correctly (which he does), they haven't really spoken much off-camera in two weeks, three days and ninety-two minutes, not that jungkook's counting.

which is why he swears in shock as he returns home to jimin sitting on the couch, blanket bunched around his chest, barely awake with the lights completely off.

“hyung—” he says, having half a mind to tell him to sleep early, but jimin sees him and straightens almost immediately, face void of any smile or emotions.

“why didn't you tell me?” his voice is awfully quiet, strained, and jungkook isn't used to this. to a jimin with steely brown eyes, lips twisted ever so tight, tone harsh.

his breath catches in his throat and jungkook panics momentarily, heart stuttering uncomfortably in his chest.

“about what?” he meekly feigns ignorance, tries to leave but jimin’s unforgiving stare has him pinned in his spot. at his response, jimin chuckles bitterly, eyes flitting up to the ceiling angrily.

“do you really hate me that much?” jungkook’s heart stops right in his chest. what?

“look, I’m sorry the universe paired you with someone like me but do you always have to...” he trails, voice breaking, and jungkook’s mind reels, breath coming in short pants. “leave me out of your business?”

“what are you—hyung, wait, you know?” he breathes, head spinning and the hurt on jimin’s face is enough to make his heart clench painfully. “you're so selfish, you know that, jeon jungkook? have you ever thought that maybe I wanted to be a part of your life too?”

“you don't tell me that I’m your soulmate, you don't tell me about your goddamn hiatus—to LA—for three months. have you never wondered about how hurt I’d be when I found out? woke up the next morning to you...gone?” jimin spits, standing up now, jabbing his chest.

“it's not like that—” jungkook hurries to explain, fear of losing jimin settling in, fingers fisting into his shirt so tightly his knuckles turn white.

jimin snorts, eyes glassy. “it's not like what? jungkook, we live together. I’ve seen your tattoo as many times as you’ve seen the blank space on my wrist, even if you try to hide it. you were never going to tell me. if you reject me, place me seventh in rank for looks and say you’d never date me then you hug me, kiss me, hold me and tell me you love me the next moment, what am I supposed to do?”

“but you're Nameless!” he snaps, volume rising with every word, cutting jimin off, tears pooling in the corner of his eyes. “you're Nameless and you might be confused! you don’t have to love me, okay? it's not your fucking responsibility just because your dumb name is on my wrist. don’t you get it? I only wanna hold you and touch you and kiss you and date you, but for you, it doesn't have to be me. you can do better than that, so that's why you aren't capable of loving me like I love—”

jimin holds up a hand, entirely silent, tears falling and jungkook’s fingers itch to wipe them away. he hates it all.

“you're right. maybe...maybe you should go.”

with that, jimin grabs his wallet and phone and leaves, the lonely thud of the door resonating through the entire apartment and it's just him now, left alone to break down in his misery.

VIII. I still love you madly

“one of you has to give up and make the move, you know,” taehyung sighs, finally speaking his mind after a day of awkward silence between his best friends. jungkook doesn’t respond, busy tapping away at his phone screen, probably playing some odd game.

“you can’t just leave without settling things, kook-ah. or at least trying to. he's your soulmate after all.”

jungkook pauses, locking his phone and throwing it to the side of the bed. “is that all you're here for?”

the older rolls his eyes, clearly annoyed at his stubbornness but jungkook frankly doesn't care. what did taehyung take him for? of course he wanted to settle things, but jimin…

jimin hadn't even glanced at him for the past three days.

“listen, I’ve been his best friend since eons ago and I know it when I say he loves you, okay? he loves you a whole lot, looks at you like you're his world,” taehyung says, exasperatedly.

jungkook doesn't believe him. not one bit. “he doesn't know what he’s doing—”

taehyung groans, clawing at his hair. “but he does! he doesn't have to love you but he does! you weren't the one who had to sit with him at a bar till half past three, watching him bawl his eyes out about being Nameless and wishing your name would magically appear on his skin, okay? you're just so fucking dense sometimes, jungkook-ah.”

“what do I even say?” he snaps back, all the mixed emotions rushing out of his system. “that I don't hate him? that I’m just shy and scared he’ll get tired of me, so I rank him last in looks every single time and say I’ll never date him, but I lack self-control, so sometimes I let my heart rule my brain and tell him half of the things I want to say? it's not like I wanted to hide the fact that he’s my soulmate, I just didn't know how to go about it, worried about his reaction, if he’d push me away, okay? I’m shy and scared and scared because I love him, goddamnit! more than anything else in the world.”

he chokes on his inhale, eyes caught on the figure standing at his door. for a second, he expects jimin to turn around and leave, but the older remains in his spot, sharply knocking on the door, seemingly to alert taehyung.

“can we talk?” jimin’s standing at the doorway, expression unreadable, eyes fixated on taehyung’s hand around jungkook’s wrist. jungkook nods, confusedly, sitting upright, and taehyung flees in record time, patting jimin’s shoulder on the way out, shutting the door.

jungkook pretends not to hear how taehyung whispers I’m glad you listened, bro to jimin.

and then there's a long, startlingly loud silence as jimin walks over to sit down by the bed. his eyes are soft, gentle as he pushes away the stray locks of hair covering jungkook’s face.

the action is too intimate, and jungkook reaches up to grab jimin’s hand, a quiet signal for him to stop. “hyung—” he mumbles, lost, and jimin hushes him, but pulls away nonetheless.

“are you scared of me?” he asks pointedly, a tinge of pain threaded into the timbre of his voice. jungkook is quick to shake his head, tangling his fingers into the bedsheets in order to stop himself from resting them on jimin’s hips. “even like this?” he continues, bracing two hands on the headboard as he leans close, then closer, to jungkook.

the younger nods, squirming a little bit, sinking down the mattress till he’s fully on his back, avoiding his gaze. their breaths mingle in the short distance, and jungkook can practically feel jimin on his skin.

“do you trust me then?” jimin murmurs, thick accent flooding his voice and god, if only jimin knew how much it affected jungkook.

jungkook nods, more reluctant this time but equally as sure. with that, jimin straddles him, thigh slotting itself between his legs, hands pinning his to the sheets carefully, fingers intertwining. jungkook’s breath hitches and he feels entirely vulnerable like this, nowhere to run.

“I wanna hear it.” jimin leans down to mouth at the shell of his ear. the older pulls away as his body seizes, worried about crossing the line, and a needy whine rips from his throat uncontrollably.

“I trust you,” jungkook stammers, heart going wild. he doesn't have much time to ponder about the consequences though, because jimin’s lips are pressed against his in the next moment.

sparks fly behind his eyelids as they kiss painfully slow at first, treading water. jungkook whimpers into his mouth once he realizes that he's not dreaming, and jimin is eager to swallow it down.

he grows impatient after a while, licking into the roof of jimin’s mouth as he guides the older’s tongue into his mouth, moaning shamelessly. they kiss for a while longer, until jimin pulls away and jungkook’s crashed back into reality. “hyung, you—”

“still trust me?” jungkook nods, opening his mouth to speak but jimin shushes him, natural blush oddly apparent in the dim light. “listen closely, jeon jungkook. I don't know how I fell in love with someone as dense as you, but I’m happy I did. I really am, even though you're always a brat to me, calling me short and stirring up my emotions with your caring actions after. I don't know how much faith you have in me, but I will never, ever get tired of you so will you please…”

his voice cracks, airy. “accept me?”

needless to say, jungkook acquiesces.

(the night ends with him gasping into jimin’s mouth, rutting up against the older desperately, jimin grinding down slowly, too slow, fingers digging into his hipbones, mapping out jungkook’s body with his lips.

“never gonna let anyone touch you again,” jimin growls against the marred skin of his neck, laving his tongue over the dark bruises blooming across his neck.

he ends up coming into his pants with an embarrassingly loud whine as he makes the mistake of glancing down at the slick seeping out of his boxers and smearing against jimin's jeans, mixing with the older’s, breath stuttering in his chest, flushing at how fucking wet he is, practically dripping all over himself. jimin releases right after, heaving as though the thought of jungkook coming was enough to get him off, biting down on the inside of his wrist where jungkook’s tattoo is.)

((although jimin makes it a point to tease him about it, he’ll admit himself that yeah, it is pretty hot.))

XI. With your every move

jungkook wakes up to someone kissing down his body, sensitive, back arching off the bed. “hyung,” he groans, shudder running through his body and jimin smirks from where he sucks marks into jungkook’s flesh, kiss-swollen lips shining with spit when he pulls away.

“morning,” jimin says, using his accent on purpose, drinking in the way jungkook’s thighs shake in his hands as his voice dips into a lower register.

jungkook realises he has his oversized blue sweater bunched around his armpits and a pair of white panties with blue stripes on when he finally, finally opens his eyes, and really, there’s only one culprit responsible for this, because jeon jungkook is team #sleepnaked. said culprit pushes his thighs apart obscenely, trailing kisses up, up, up his thighs and stomach, stopping at his nipples and god, he’s never going to be able to look at his sweater the same way again.

“morning,” he mumbles later, hooking his chin over jimin’s shoulder, backhugging the older as he pours milk into both their cereals. jimin reaches back to ruffle his hair affectionately, before waddling them out of the kitchen where the other boys are.

namjoon spits out a mouthful of milk upon seeing them and taehyung groans appropriately, seated opposite the cute leader.

hoseok makes a strangled noise in the back of his throat as he walks into the living room.

yoongi tsks, pulling out a chair for his boyfriend. “two months of disgustingly cheesy words and cringey couple clothes and you guys still can’t get used to this?”

“you wouldn't mind doing that with hobi though,” jungkook states, shrugging and yoongi cusses at him, but a pink blush stains his cheeks.

whipped, jungkook mouths over jimin’s head sneakily and yoongi shoots him the finger, drawing a thumb across his neck.

you’re dead.

“you really cried your heart out there, kookie,” jimin teases with a lilt in his voice, seated comfortably in jungkook’s lap as the younger carefully takes his makeup off.

“shut up,” he grunts, embarrassed and jimin giggles even more, laugh tinkling like church bells.

the older pulls his hand away to lace their fingers together, smiling down at him beautifully before kissing the back of his hand. “I thought it was cute.”

jungkook huffs, tugging his hands out of the older’s grasp as he wipes of jimin’s foundation with a piece of cotton wool. if jimin notices the flush grazing his cheeks, he doesn't say anything about it.

“bingsu?” he asks later, walking towards the backstage exit of the concert arena and jimin hums like he's actually contemplating it.

they let go of each other’s hand unwillingly as they reach the door, fingers twiddling with each other until it’s finally pulled open for them. somehow, it feels like everything and nothing has changed about their relationship, jimin still fussing lovingly over him, and him still being a brat.

one day, jungkook promises himself as he shoots a smile in the direction of one of his biggest fansites before getting into the car after jimin.

one day he’ll show them off to the world.

#armiesnet #btsmaknaenet #btswriters #busanboysnet #thebtsnetwork #jikook fluff week #jikook #yoonseok #jikook fics #jikook smut #jimin #jungkook #writing #bts #bangtan boys #fluff #angst

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chickenfetus · 7 years

Note

softly whispers all for the flower ask

baby’s breath: 5 things you associate yourself with

chickens/eggs

lance lol

cereal….. everyone in class is stealing my trademark…

water

memes

bleeding heart: what makes you heart go mushy?

fuck,,, my fav characters?? and if i like someone then them i guess? but rn my heart belongs to 2d

bell flower: what’s the title of the song that makes you want to jump around out of joy?

mm it changes?? right now its either this cover (its in japanese) or this song (english but its a tad bit scream-y)

evening primrose: what’s your sleeping playlist (give me 5 songs)?

its all soundtracks from anime lmao,,

from kimi no na wa’s soundtrack we have this, this and this

from free!’s ost we have this song that killed every mh shipper lol

and lastly, not from an anime ost, its shelter

none of these actually help me fall asleep but i like them,, hell i dont think theres any song that can help me fall asleep

forget-me-not: who is your favorite blog who isn’t following you?

miyu//keis does this ensure it doesnt show up i hope it does i recently followed them while lurking in the mi//sawa tag lol theyre a good graphic person??? idk what theyre called;;

daffodil: what is one plant that you want to have but can never get?

the succulent things but i wouldnt be able to care for it bc i succ (perfect match)

calla lily: are you more of a sunny day or a rainy evening?

im a sunny day and rainy evening person… ok maybe sunny day if im not directly under the sun because i do enjoy the sun’s warmth rainy days are nice too,, only if im indoors.. rainy evening is perfect,, as long as no bugs can get it im safe and secure and chill

foxglove: what is your favorite color and in what shade?

blue!!!!! is sky blue a shade

lavender: what is something that you’ve always wanted to be/have/get but can never have?

a cat…..

love in a mist: what is the latest dream that you remember?

ok ive had dreams every night this week but now i cant re oh wait i do remember last night’s dream but only the lame part,, ok so i dreamt i had a 4* hina on bang dream..,,, i dreamt of another thing but i forgot :-( the 4* was indeed a dream though sad i havent gotten a single 4* yet lmao my luck is awesome oh but i did get a 5* and two 4*s on enstars so thats cool

daisy: what is your favorite flavor of cotton candy, ice cream, and juice?

cotton candy,, has flavours?????

cookies and cream!!

i like water juice

painter’s palette: are you more of a singer, dancer, painter, or instrumentalist?

none??? i guess i paint when i have to although i rly wanna paint but im just a lazy fool

tulip: what is your most favorite make-up product? do you like it more natural, dark, or etc?

i dont use make up i am a youngin also what does the second question say i dont understand

waxflower: are you a bee or a butterfly person? a dog or a cat person?

neither lmao i have a fear of butterflies and bees… bees fear me i fear bees its mutual fear i like cats better but i like dogs too

sugarbush: do you have sweet tooth? if yes, what’s your favorite sweets? if no, why?

yes,,, i was gonna ask if it was even possible to have a favourite but then i remembered i do actually one although its more of a jellybean thing its poifull!!

sunflower: would you like to be a fairy or a mermaid?

mermaid bc i wanna live in the water

sweet pea: what would you like to call your significant other?

ok i just finished acca so naturally i still think abt it and jean called nino his ‘partner in crime’ so nnow i want one (a partner in crime i mean not a nino but thatd b cool 2)

sea lavender: can you swim? which strokes can you do?

yes i havent been in a pool in like 3 years oh boy,, breaststroke is the easiest lmao i forgot how to do any of the others

windflower: list 5 of your favorite blogs and explain why you like them

softshouyous, well i followed her bc she talks in her tags so thats one thing,, shes also super nice?? and helpful!!! a good friend and mutual!!!! im also comfy enough with her to like,, be sarcastic and we can shame each other freely.. without worrying abt offending one another,, theres also the fact that she understands me (ok this may b what i like 2 think and falen actually doesnt get me but its COOL) idk man i just love her,,, my bud whens our one year friendsivary i gotta search that up :0

(i almsot forgot to do the rest go me anyway) next is,, youhavebeentraceyd bc shes one of my first mutuals (sorry to the one who was actually my first) who i actually talked to!!! we both watch daiya and i didnt rly follow anyone who liked daiya previously and oh!! we had the same notps LOL i love tracey’s art and hell i think she dragged me to mochi hell kudos to u tracey idk i jsut enjoy her presence on my dash and get v excited to see her art on there we may not talk as much anymore but i still appreciate her a lot!!! bless u tracey and thank you!!! (for being alive i wish u all the best in life)

alpacarara i like her bc shes basically my tumble mum,, the mum i actually talk to and ask for help/advice she gives good advice too and shes v approachable,,,,,,, a v good friend,,,,,, u r appreciated by me,,,, yes........... shizu chan also appreciates ur existence momther,,,, thakn u 4 all youve done 2 helpme a good pal.... bless u,

clearly these r getting hard bc my mind is goddamn empty rn but ill manage,, kacchan whose url is not spelt like that but thats ook bc one day it will be but now im starting to think i shouldnt leave it as that bc someones bound to stumble upon this extra post in the kacchan tag goddammit,, annYWay i like kacchan bc theyre friendly! and also v relatable,,,, theyre also kinda scary but thats ok bc its the good kind of scary idk man kacchan is just, great?? we dont talk but thats cool bc ik we’re still friends even if we dont have full blown convos!!!! id b 2 nervous 2 talk 2 them not bc theyre bad or anythign im just a ??? a bad conversationalist and also v lazy ok thats besides the point i like kacchan bc kacchan is kacchan so??? theyre a good friend and we tag each other in things and i like that friendship its a good type of friendship,,, idkdkdk?? theyre just. chill not literally chill but just chill. this doesnt make sense anymre gomenasorry

lAST ONE uh hhhh every one of my mutual’s blogs why i like all of them?? bc theyre not problematic!! they post good content trademark and r lovely even if we dont talk much!!! i love everyone period

golden rod: are you more of a baker or a cook?

i am more of a Disaster in the kithcen

bloom: what is something that you would like to tell your children?

u guys shld b surprised yall even exist (if i am the True Parent)

if not,, then itd b u guys r with me and my partner in crime,, who is actually a real person,,,,,, be shocked idk im just trying t o make it clear that in the event i do get married id surprise myself bc me/?? have a good and lasting relationship????? impsossible

peony: what is something that you wish your parents could’ve told you?

they shouldve told me to stick with cereal

prairie gentian: do you have a significant other?

doe s lance count

september flower: are you more of a sunshine or sunset person?

was this supposed 2 say sunrise,,,, anyway sunrise i guess bc im a morning person (when i WILLINGLy wake up by myself) on hot ass days sunset bc then i wont b sweating 24/7

bird of paradise: do you wake up early? do you sleep early?

yEAH LOL i wake up early on weekends bc i want to and i have to wake up early on weekdays so,,, i prefer not to sleep later than 12am bc i am Fear and in the event that i do sleep later than 12 its bc im talkin 2 a friend i like a lot

marigold: what’s your favorite tea?

water tea english breakfast,, havent had that in awhile tho

peruvian lily: what are the names of your pets?

i have non

hyacinth: do you name your plants?

i have nnone but i dont even nickname my pkmn so

lilac: would you rather sleep and be cozy or hang out with your friends?

depends? on the tme??? if its late at night id rather b asleep and cozy if its in the day then maybe.. .. .

poppy: do you like to dip your fries or do you like it as is?

i like all of my food plain and dry (cereal) unless its noodles,, i need my noodles iin soup

dandelion: any special talent that you have?

drinking water

#softshouyous #asks #this got long #tHANK U FOR ASKING i did it!!!!#its been so long #since i properly answered one of ur asks memes #feels good

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