#i dont See It anymore (it used to be if i even THOUGHT about it it would show up)
Text
do you ever think about how marco is one of the last people who knows how close shanks and buggy once were? do you think he ever looks at shanks and instinctively searches for buggy? i bet you marco looks at shanks surrounded by his crew and still thinks that shanks looks lonely. because back then, you could never find one without the other. if you insulted shanks, you insulted buggy and vice versa. they were attached at the hip. if you got one of them alone, you better savor it because in the next five minutes, the other one would come find them. like in my heart i know every time marco sees shanks these days all he thinks is where's the rest of you?
#marco who has first hand knowledge about how close shanks and buggy used to be#marco who never knows what to think when he sees shanks these days bc what happened? where's buggy?#where's the rest of you?#marco who hears about buggy's arrest and his first thought is 'oh fuck shanks isn't gonna like that' until he remembers that they dont talk#marco who privately thinks that shanks' less than who he used to be#marco who wonders what exactly happened to roger's cabin boys#i like to think ace asks him once why he always gets that funny look on his face whenever he sees shanks and marco doesn't know how to expl#the seas greatest mystery. bc how do you explain that these two people who were once so close don't even seem to think about each other#anymore. how do you explain just how well buggy and shanks clicked? how do you explain what they used to be to someone who has only ever#seen the broken remnants of what they are now?#head in hands head in hands head in hands#fushichou marco#marco the phoenix#op marco#akagami no shanks#op shanks#shanks one piece#buggy the clown#buggy one piece#op buggy#shanks x buggy#shuggy#one piece
105 notes
·
View notes
Text
wish some of u were into typology id love to know how youd type some fnaf chars so bad
#but all most people know ab typology is that fake 16personalities bullshit Sigh#and i havent tried typing any of the chars (specifically talking ab modern fnaf chars) like ness or cassie or greg bc im just not sure if i#agree w the consensus on pdb dot com.. i feel like infp so4 cassie and istp sx6 greg are total copouts but i havent thought about it so IDK#injecting enneagram theory into all of ur brains and making u give me your thoughts on this/j /sillaayyyy#also theres the whole istj or isfj ness debacle and idk if i lean more towards her having te aux or fe aux or totally different type..#ig i can see si user ness but. I DOJT KNOW!!#and some of u really GET the characters more than i do man. u could impart revelation i cannot conceive of#ALSO BC THERES ONLY ONE VOTE ON TONYS PAGE AND IT MAKES ME EVIL. HE IS NOT E7 GET REAL#even so7 is a stretch. actually. i dont know. but i dont see E7. where is his gluttony!!! i have no idea how to type him tho😞#but hes typed enfp which is bullshit bc Ne doms would not be so into reality like him dude. i dont see it#i was thinkung a ni-se type or some shit but that might b a copout too and idk. i have no idea#Siiighhhh i hold ancient knowledge that i cannot use alone yet no peer shares my sight (i dont know what im saying anymore)#if any of u are into psychology and dont know ab typology u should sooo ask me ab it i will gladly inflict so much information onto u!!!🫶🏼#or better yet if any of my fnaf mutuals Are in the know ab it. HI HELLO? please tell me your thoughts on any fnaf characters typologies#as if anybody even read this far down. i sound like a madman probably. /silly#cam.txt#also i was thinking cassie is probably E6 not E4 bc of her whole fear of abandonment issues she has going on??? or whatever??? sp6 probably
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
something about being told im 'the leading person at this whole academy when it comes to interpretation and stage intelligence' by the husband of the woman im trying (not really. but i mean. who knows) to seduce... ok boy you got me. lets make it a polycule.
#im playing it all cool and funny now but atm i legit burst into tears lol#like he said i have a 'good voice too of course' but i know realistically that is not my strongest asset#and even if i were technically perfect. which im NOT lol. the voice itself is just nothing special. it's there ig but that's about it#but its nice to know i may not be 100% useless after all#(just 90%)#also apparently the most feared and respected professor who came to the concert said. again. that he likes me the most.#which again. crying real actual tears about this all rn this means literally the world to me this is everything i have#and i have no one to share this with because im not gonna say it to my uni friend cause i dont want her to feel like im boasting or sth#(even tho she has no such qualms herself but probably because i know how. not great. it feels when someone keeps talking about themselves#and about how great they are and how easy everything is for them. i dont wanna do it back at her.#well there's also the fact that i dont think im great and this is not fucking easy to me at all lol#but idk i think the difference between us is that she actually admitted she sees no point in singing if she cant show off (thus she hates#the duet we're singing because she sings the lower part and cant show off her high notes or coloratura.#which is like. an insane take to me. i mean it i get it. kinda. if i had a voice like hers maybe id be like that too fuck knows.#but that just feels so. idk. sad to me. so self obsessed and empty. like you dont care about the music itself? about you being a part of it?#also immediately made singing with her not fun anymore. i thought we were creating something TOGETHER. but thanks for the confirmation#that you only really care about being 'better than'. yikes.#like idk this behaviour is funny and iconic in old school opera legends like yes go bite each others dicks off.#but it hits completely different when it's your own colleague let alone your friend. like damn girl. damn)#) anyway. the husband is kinda hot too now that i think of it. i really should seduce them both.#except its realistically not possible since they've both seen me cry now (she saw it like a hundred times lol)#so ive lost the hot and mysterious card alas. no uni professors romance for me
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
looking on at the ✨hype✨ about last stage like
#i wanna be excited about it too!!!!! lemme in~~~~~~~~~~#maybe it’s just bc i didn’t listen to the ‘loid version on the koishiteru album but i think im not as excited about it as i should be lmaooo#on jp twt there are fans screaming about last stage and i. feel kinda left out ngl??? fomo’s hittin’ like a truck and idek w h y#but me? im just clinging to meoto to ✨carry on✨#idk why but it kinda sounds like that song aka***ki enstrs sang to beat r****ts to a pulp in the anime#i dont even like enstrs anymore so idk why that song was the first thing i thought of when i heard the preview help#in any case!!!!! i hope the rest of the new songs get mvs!!!! especially meoto!!!!!!!!!!!!#going by the love chuchuchu(chu! kawaikute gomen—) im p sure that’s gonna be the moge mv lol#wont be surprised if their outfits in the mv are the same ones that they’re wearing in the moge-ilustrated album standees…#if that is indeed how the oshi no mahou mv is gonna go… all of you will now owe me tree fiddy >:) if not nothing happens idk#im very much looking forward to seeing where the completely new direction of upcoming lxl songs is gonna take us though#(p r a y i n g for lxl falling for each other in 4k hd p ls—)#g o d i should really get some sleep my innate state of crabbiness is creepin’ in the tags here too aaaaaa
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
do i really want to make individual drinks again
#reaching back into the file cabinets of my mind to remember how i made certain drinks when i worked at the cafe#in preparation for the possibility of this new job#it would certainly mean far less goofing off time than i have at my current job. and i value my goofing off time dearly#but the people here are so fucking annoying lmao. i hate them soooo much#not that the people at this new job would be any better. we're still dealing with investment bankers#godddddd. what i really would want (which would be impossible)#would be to go back to working at the cafe but like. still have paid time off and insurance lmao#but the cafe was a small business and he was not offering paid time off and insurance. and the pay was way less#but i did get to play whatever music i wanted. unfortunately you cant live on that#like i can always say no to this new job if its offered to me. but is my goofing off time worth:#2 dollars less in pay and a half hour to an hour's more commute. well i dont know#a shorter commute would mean i could sleep more. and have more time at home .#i mean i probably don't Need all this goofing off time. but its nice#i dont knowwwwwww#like even though im a bit nervous abt doing it again i know that i would easily fall back into the routine of making drinks#which i was fairly good at. my one drawback is that i cant do latte art but i dont know that theyd really care here#and (because i found the menu of where id work) theres not a ton of drink options?? just the standard stuff#its being called a starbucks cafe but 1) its not managed by them and 2) it does not have their 5 billion drink options#so thats good. less to worry about#doesnt look like i even have to make anything foodwise which i had to at the cafe#here it looks like people can just buy a pastry and thats it#the hours are like. the same i work now. also good#sorry im like using this post to think through my thoughts.#uhhhh oh i looked up the manager who looks like a weenie so im not keen on the prospect of interviewing with him#but i probably would have thought that about my current manager if id seen a pic of him prior to interviewing. i guess???#and with these kind of catering units it seems you dont often deal directly with the manager that much anyway#i just gotta see if i get good vibes#rn i have unsure vibes. but i need a sign to see if this could be good for me#oh id also save money on transportation. and taxes! bc i wouldnt be working in ny anymore#lol oops tag limit. well i hope you enjoyed my job thoughts you probably didnt i know i didnt
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
who up feeling their spirit get crushed into dust by this ai shit 😂😂😂
#turns out my laptop isnt strong enough to run glaze so now i gotta wait at least a month for them to reply to my dm 😃#not on them at all ik theyre swamped but im just like. why do we have to fucking do this#like putting poison on our lunch so coworkers stop stealing it. Why do the coworkers get away with stealing it in the first place#why is this how things have worked out. the amount of companies ive seen use ai generation for their ads (TABLET COMPANIES.)………#im like. u used to have to pay an artist to do that. and instead of putting technicology to good use#where it can do things that are tedious/difficult/impossible for humans to do#we’ve decided to have the machines do the one job we thought a machine COULDNT steal. bc its abt human creativity and passion#why. bc it saves a bunch of rich fucks even more money and they dont give a fuck about the rest of us#this shit wouldnt even exist if human artists werent here first for it to copy its souless its nothing its cold and dead i fucking hate it#YEARS of work and experience and craft honing and nobody gives a fuck they just see a person they dont have to pay anymore#steals our lifes work without our permission without paying us without a care how is my spirit NOT supposed to feel crushed#i see an ai image and all i see is decades of hard work that was stolen like if u ripped the bones out of a living person#ik jts dramatic and i keep going on abt rhis but it just bothers me SO fucking much#every time i have to think abt it its like a thousand pound rock dropped into my stomach#x
9 notes
·
View notes
Note
would it be okay if u told me why u like aoki😭/gen😭😭😭😭BEEN TRYNA LIKE HIM FOR SO LONG I JUST CANTT but i love ur art so much so i still consume it otherwise lol
i liked tohru adachi in high school and tbh i think that alone is enough of an explanation for why i ended up liking aoki
#snap chats#haha see i told you last post's tags were relevant#anyway vLKVJEVLKAEJVLKJ IM CRYING ANON youre so funny. this is the funniest ask i coulda got thank you so much#i dont know why i like him either <- yes i do#fine lets get Real Talk about it#well first off all i thought he looked hot rolling out the elevator and i was playing the eng dub and i think his voice sounds hot there#and thats like. not athing that happens to me ever <- literally thought sawashiro was hot two frames into the game but anyway#i like politician characters. or characters that are in a position of power ESPECIALLY if they have to act like they dont suck balls#like i very much love the idea of the power of charisma and that type of thing not to mention the 'strategizing' as aoki puts it#that comes with politics. LIKE HE SUCKS DONT GET IT TWISTED HE SUCKS BUT //shrug emoji//#like its why i love the mine rggo stories i like seeing mine's thought process and how he uses his intelligence#smart's sexy to me idk what to tell you but moving on#its fun watching him lose his cool too ESP IN HIS FIGHT LMAO HE STOMPIN HIS FOOT LIKE A TODDLER SHUT UP#i also really love the arakawa family in general and thinking of aoki's relationship with each of them makes my brain explode#especially him and sawashiro that shit is painful to watch and i love it so much#i also thought him going from goth to republican was the funniest shit in the world like i howled at that AND i was distraught#aokis so interesting to me from the notion that he IS loved by his family but he has so much hatred for himself it eats him up#and as a result he cant be happy no matter what he does- how hes constantly seeking validation even if it's nothing meaningful#his lil. Dog-Eat-Dog world world belief to ichi also appealed to my edgy depressed high schooler brain. sorry.#his speech at the lockers also got to me. unfortunately. sorry everyone i empathized too hard it got too real it wasnt funny anymore#like as much as i complain bout the very end the ending is what solidified me liking aoki if not also cause of ichi's impact in those scene#plus... analyzing him and the environment around him is so much fun too....#idk reasons for why i like aoki also boil down to personal reasons. he still sucks tho so i cant be upset when people hate him LOL#i probably have more reasons or could elaborate more i love rambling but i mean. who really wants to read all that 💀💀#maybe for a character that WASNT the worst but. aoki is so LMAO#thank you for loving my art regardless :) im sorry i have to be attached to the worst guys ever
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
tired girl hours i’m just ranting bcos i don’t have enough time to cry
#tw rant#studying med is no joke. ik it was gonna be a commitment n that it wasnt gonna be easy n i thought i was prepared but im not#its my passion. i love what im studying and ive dedicated myself to this path but i just. its so hard n i just want to cry. everyday feels#so tiring. morning to night classes. when i get home i have to read 4 chapters MINIMUM n the books are so thick + exams almost everyday#i feel worse knowing there’s this 1 girl in my friend group that cant decide whether she likes me or not. one moment shes complimenting me#n asking where i get my outfits or my nails done or my earrings or whatever then praising me that i probably study the least out of everyone#yet still reach high student rankings but its not that im lazy im just so exhausted n its hard to have motivation... lowkey envy how my#friends study minimum 4 hours a day. we’re all tired n sleep deprived. even taking 30mins to eat makes me feel guilty. cant even watch 1 ep#of an anime bcos ill be thinking about the amount of work to do. and i have sm plans. i wanna be more active and have a healthier lifestyle#but i cant find it in me to wake up every 5am to go to the gym when i just wanna get as much sleep when im lucky to finish my studies today#i also dont see my bestest friends everyday anymore. some of us move to diff unis or some in diff majors. i just miss them so bad it hurts#and i miss the girl i used to be when i still had time and energy to indulge in my hobbies. i miss playing genshin and writing fics#just when i got back to writing and enjoyed it LOVED IT i had to go back to uni. i feel terribly lonely even when im always with people#im afraid ill completely lose grasp of the little things that make me happy bcos the weight of my responsibilities are heavier#im afraid ill be too focused on success again like i was when i was 17 and forget that its okay to relax too but idk#and i wanna meet more people make more friends have new experiences. i wanna feel alive again. and theres sm i wanna talk to or get to know#but im so afraid of people hurting me or disappointing me or people getting to know me only for the friendships to fail or we’ll dislike eac#h other. i wanna date and fall in love again and experience the romance my peers have. i wanna have someone to call my own person but the fe#ar of having someone only to lose them someday scares the hell outta me. im not ready for another heartbreak so i isolate myself and watch#people from afar. uni gives me sm freedom to do everything else and form my own identity but i dont wanna be Perceived. I wanna be heard and#seen n connect with people. but w my curreny state idt i can handle being vulnerable with others. it feels so lonely that the things i want#are out of my rrach but idt i can manage my time to meet new people and make new memories. i console myself by shopping a lot and going to#spas to relax yet i still find it hard to sleep. im afraid im wasting my time. im not as brave as i used to be. im not as efficient as i was#i get older and more tired and while i never questioned if studying med was the path i want i do question what will happen next#“is this all im ever going to be?” im good at what i do but day by day i lose sight of tje girl who knew how to laugh n smile. ik what makes#me happy but i rarely smile genuinely anymore. im so tired and want to sleep for a long time but i dont wanna fail. i dont wanna be NOT good#but it makes me cry when i know i can do many great things but i dont feel loved. people compliment me but dont approach me bcos they say im#intimidating or that im too quiet in class. i wish i could tell them i wanna join their parties too or i wanna meet their friends n hangout#but what if it doesnt work out? what if i wasted my time getting to know someone id eventually regret? what if im the disappointing one?#the days are getting shorter but it always feels like a long day. im ashamed to admit i want someone to hold me yet refuse to have anyone
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
actually i kinda wonder now if theyll put veliona into hsr or is she just sorta mixed into this seele?
#snow plays hsr#idk enough about veliona i just see her everytime i decide to start crying about seele so im just 🤔 thinking#but at this point i often wonder just how much theyll take from honkai impact and put into star rail#i feel like its going to wind up being more spin off and completely separate but what do i know im new to honkai impact#and im not even up to date with star rail#but yeah.....#its already pretty fun though seeing the parallels between bronseele for both stories (i love them sm)#but i wonder how much more#not that i can appreciate it at this point but yeah#'snow why are u posting about this here' bc im sleepy and i dont care anymore.#i wanna post more about viddygame thoughts like i used to tbh#ik i would do it on a rambling blog but#what if. i just. do it here. :)#tbh i need more hi3 friends/mutuals. im new so i have zero clue about anything but... people to annoy#ANYWAYS good night#wait veli might be separate i just dont know it works just yet#WE WILL LEARN ITS OK#im just a newbie.... the lore too big for my brain to understand but we are putting pieces together 🔍
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
yesterday i spent 45 minutes of my life watching a video essay criticising the use of cheap shock values and crossing of taboos for a video game and i went from "he has a point even if he's explaining it in a really inflammatory way" to "oh umm... i can see how he thinks that way even if i don't agree" to "oh this guy's just straight up using people on tumblr as material for an audience to get mad at like other outdated people on the internet. nvm he's just an asshole"
#yuu rambles#it was about the coffin of andey and leyley btw - i agreed w him on the first half of the video about how it felt rather noncommittal to it#concepts and themes but i recognise its not really *trying* to be serious which means its not a reasonable#framework to judge the intention and execution of its work - an apple pie does use butter in it but just bc it does#doesnt mean you get to compare it to steak; a dish that also uses butter. this is intuitively easy to understand for me#but nonetheless it was like 3 am i had stuff to do so i just put it on my background to listen#he makes a diss at “people on tumblr” early on that i just raised my eyebrow at but shrugged it off bc its such an old joke#its lost its zinger; and im p sure its just confirmation bias from going into the tags of the thing you dont like lol if you use tumblr#normally you wouldn't come across things you dont like bc you'd have blocked them. But Anyways#then at the end he got sooo self righteous about how people on tumblr are insane and weird and showed screencaps about how twisted everyone#who likes the game are. there were some screenshots of people's post that were like “incest is bad and shouldn't be explored in media.#paragraph break‚ me who is an incest survivor and finds it helpful for working through my trauma: lol”#those types of post. but then lmfao he started going out of pocket and just mentioned the lists of other people he doesnt like which are#a screenie of a video essay about how kink is important at pride#and then some other stuff i dont remember anymore w the tumblr screenies#it was very mockingly written and said and at the end of it i felt sad i couldnt#block people on youtube lmao. like its not i dont want this guy to comment on my videos. i dont want to see his channel involuntarily#recommended to me ever again. just resorted to the most base sort of trolling behaviour he accused and judge other game devs for in his#video essay. good fucking god. the psychological projection is unreal#i dont have any strong feelings towards the game at the end of it even though i thought i would be like Eugh at first#but my bleh for any cheap gimmicks is overshadowed by my disdain for this guy's reliance on self righteous rhetoric#i discovered another new channel i really like tho after that vid!! bc i had to watch smth else to cleanse my palate lmao#they're jacob geller and freddydude! ive only seen one vid from freddydude about his essay on#detention‚ the horror game set in taiwan during the era of white terror under new cn leadership after ww2#im personally quite jumpy so his humour and the way he edits his videos to make it silly even though its Scary#made me like it a lot!! im going through jacob geller's other vids but ive watched three specific types of terror#and the one about pinocchio which made me go :00 wow his scripts are super good!#again everything at your own discretion esp w the whole james somerton shit‚ but i enjoyed what I've seen so far#i just wanted to end this in a somewhat positive note JSHDKSJDJD the ramblings Continue...#theres a pedantic error in one of ky tags but im gonna update it when im on comp bc mobile sucks smh my head
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Congrats me for going on a stupid little walk for my stupid little mental health.
While I was on said walk a nasty little thought popped into my brain, saying I needed to pack up and go home. For good. I was thinking about how Im having trouble identifying my thing to look forward to, remembering how my trips to melb were always exciting, not just for home cooked pasta but for getting to do other fun activities and live the lifestyle I want, when all of a sudden the "i need to go home" appears. It was weirdly upsetting and anxiety inducing and i dont know if its true or not.
#after i got my breathing back and wasnt in danger of crying anymore I had to poke a little deeper#with a 'he won't BE there even if you go back' and i was even very good about not mountaining the mole hill of appartment sesrching#i thought I'd have to start all over again with a workplace and friends#but i left friends there i wouldnt be starting from nothing#but now i need to wait a bit and see if the thought wanders off#or takes of the mask revealing a 'you dont want to go to Melbourne you want to go to one very specific apartment'#'with a sunny balcony and tomato plants and walking distance to the market and all the asian food you could also for'#or maybe actually take root as a move back to melb and live between the 3 bouldering gyms i used to frequent before moving#and bike to the gardens every week#and go to the bathhouse and DONT have a panic attack every time you go near the museum
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
ok good news, just had a really good conversation with my mirror and decided im still unwell about her 👍
#i have more thoughts about 2 pages in btbatb than i do about the entire first issue of kt ravager#its like vaguely out of character for her to be able enough to voice her feelings like that#especially to someone she doesnt know very well#but i dont even care#because YES rose with complicated views on killing <3#rose wanting to do the right thing and essentially using the justice league as her moral compass <3#rose leaving the team the minute she starts to realize it doesnt align with her view of the world <3#i hope her leaving stormwatch is permanent bc i dont. LOVE her on that team.#but also ive been spoiled recently by getting TWO roses in one month#so if she leaves..... what if i dont get to see her anymore
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
its so odd thinking back to my life a few years ago compared to now
#like. my life really sucked. its so weird to think about that. every second before i thought 'its not so bad' even when it was bad#and now i see shit it really was that bad. i really did have a reason to want to kill myself all the time#maybe i dont have to blame myself for the person i was before while i had was dealing with all that stuff. who could act normally in that#kind of situation. of course i did bad shit and feel bad about it but i was a kid. and now im treating her the way that i was always treate#back then. i was in survival mode the entire time and just never realized it#and its so strange to think about how my life sucked and i was scared and alone all the time from the perspective of myself now#im not without support anymore. im not walking on eggshells anymore. im not afraid of violence all the time anymore#i dont believe my family hates me anymore. im not ready to pack up and leave because i think theyd be better off without me anymore#before i got good at anything my hobby was thinking of all the ways i could die and who would care. i spent all my time doing this#my daydreams were only about how people would react if i died. i dont do this that often anymore. close to never. and its so odd to remembe#since i was 6 i used to think this way. and up until a year or two ago i hated every version of myself and blamed them for me#but how was that fair. my life doesnt suck anymore. people i was without came back to me and love me#i see my cousins all the time. when i text them they text back. they ask me if im okay. they know when im not eating even when theyre not#around. i dont walk on eggshells around my mom as much as i used to. her attention isnt as divided as it used to be.#my brother is more of a brother than a stranger or an enemy. the image of him now and our relationship compared to what it used to be is#crazy. i had so much reason to be sad back then. i dont know why im still sad now when i got out of that life.#even now the reasons i have to be sad have dissolved. i used to feel like i was going insane without anyone to say the things i want to to#but i can say them to my cousin now. i have places i belong. its so strange to think about. idk#aricouldyounot
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
im so mad at people who think time travel will ever exist. thats not how physics works buddy I would know (im 13 and have never studied physics in my life, however, due to an intense ego, I believe that everything my brain tells me is true because it sounds true) you are not larger than the universe you cant just grab fucking time like that and fuck with it. how would you even calculate where to go? the universe isn’t sentient or a thing it doesn’t register your HUMAN MORTAL concepts of time. you cant just tell your machine to go to 2009[1] and it’ll understand what the fuck youre talking about . shut the fuck up. listen I have childish dreams and ambitions too but you know what im NOT. an OPTIMIST. you are NOT time traveling. these are also the same reasons for visual snow and why teleportation isnt possible as well.
in 2009 stephen hawking (rip king i miss you I dont care about epsteins island you will always be in my heart) made a party for time travellers, after the party ended he released the invites . nobody showed up of course. or DID THEY? maybe they showed up but told Stephen hawking not to tell anyone they did because that could fuck up the timeline? No they didn’t. time travel isnt real. go fuck yourself hawking. love you though!
#thoughts#important#rambling#time travel#physics#people who think time travel is real are either children with dreams that I will crush because I get a sick pleasure out of seeing#childrens dreams get stomped on because I have unresolved issues or people who haven’t heard anything physics wise.#though I have to admit there is an overlap between the two because most children (especially those who haven’t passed kindergarten(garren of#ban ban reference?)) haven’t had that much time to learn such complicated things and are left to use the small amount of knowledge they have#picked up in their life. think about how much you’ve learned in 5 years#and then imagine that being all you know. I cant really blame kids that much. I wasnt blaming them in the first place. stop antagonizing me#you fucking bitch. this is why we dont talk. you always say im doing something im not. sorry you cant fucking parse basic English and the#meanings behind my words. its not my fucking fault you dont get anything god.#ive been meaning to talk to you about something#I think we should stop being friends. we only talk once a month and its all just so empty. not even one sided#neither of us have love for eachother anymore. its just a weight on both of our backs that is just holding us down. I dont hate you#but I think its time for us to just stop talking. i know you can find other people that will probably be better than me. im sorry for#everything. bye man I love you
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i have this thing where sometimes i see a smooth surface (cgi is specifically bad for this) and some part of my brain goes. hey wouldnt it be fucked up if that was Flawlessly and Perfectly Smooth. and i go yeah that would be fucked up and proceed to have an anxiety attack over the concept of a really really really flat rock face or some shit like that
#howling#and then the other people in my brain MAKE FUN OF ME FOR IT#i dont get it either!!!!#like part of my obsession with deep water stems from a reoccurring. uh#it wasnt a nightmare or anything because i would be awake it was like. a vision. or hallucination i guess but idk if it was one for real#but it was like. a glass of water but the glass was perfectly smooth and the water was perfectly flat and didn't ripple#so all the sides were SUPER smooth#and it doesnt SOUND fucked up but the actual image itself was the scariest goddamn thing imaginable#i dont See It anymore (it used to be if i even THOUGHT about it it would show up)#but sometimes ill see something and i get the Water Glass Terror (tm) again without the actual water glass#all this to say that i watched the first episode of that ashoka show today#and in like the second scene she cuts holes in the ground with a lightsaber and it fucked me up a little bit#anyways the only reason why im sharing it is because there really isnt a pattern#on what smooth surfaces do or do not trigger the Water Glass Terror#and even then any given thing only works once#like even with cgi sometimes itll hit REALLY hard and other times? nothing#idk man im just still feeling it a little bit and want to get some of this shit off my chest#catch me oversharing on the oversharing webbed sight <3
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
🌊
#journal#venting here bc i dont want garden people to see#my heart's more broken than i thought#it really was just the shock masking the pain for a long while#i can't find it in me anymore to go to my favorite place#because all i think about is how we used to go there together as the sun rose#i can't look at the sun setting over the sea the same way either anymore#because i think of how warm his eyes looked the last time we waded out together#i wanted to tell him then#how beautiful he looked#but the lump in my throat was too big#and i thought we had forever#because even when i thought he'd leave eventually he'd always tell me to trust him not to#is this why ive been yearning for the sea lately#is this why i haven't been able to go near enough to touch it
2 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
nsfwgifs
NSFW Gifs
kdzaichenok
Brow.zaiki
goo-goo-dolls
shrunk after hitting the bong
aliciagworld11-blog
Alicia G
