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free-pool-trash · 3 years

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happiness - peter maximoff

yay a new peter fic <3 i was feeling a little unmotivated for a few days (since our boy wasn’t in episode 8 at all :/) but im back 😎 although im back in school so i might be on and off for a while 😩✋🏻

!!!it’s not a songfic those lyrics at the start are just my inspo!!!

word count: 5k <3 😳

warnings: maybe swearing but i dont think so i cant remember, peter being sad, angst, but mostly fluff, WandaVision spoilers maybe??? I pretty much made up this plot so idk, endgame spoilers, reader was an avenger, kissing but it’s not graphic😽 probably some mistakes yk how it is

feedback is appreciated <3

tagging: @enchantedcruelsummer (should i make a peter maximoff taglist? let me know and I’ll do it)

masterlist

haunted by the look in my eyes that would’ve loved you for a lifetime

leave it all behind

& there is happiness

Loneliness had always been something that plagued him. That and a plethora of other negative emotions.

There wasn’t a day that went by where Peter Maximoff wasn’t made to feel like a loser. Admittedly, he’d never held himself to a high standard, he grew up thinking that he’d never fit in anywhere and eventually that thought mutated into a lifestyle as he began isolating himself from the world around him, either far too good or heartbreakingly not enough to be a part of that crowd.

He liked spending time with himself. Nobody else knew him the way he knew him, and still, he found nothing but an overwhelming hollow space where his deepest most important hopes, aspirations, dreams and self discoveries should have resided.

Peter had always put this feeling of exile down to the fact that he was a mutant, it was the most likely explanation, right?

It was only when he’d decided to join the X-Men that he finally came to the conclusion that maybe the rest of the world wasn’t the problem, nor was his mutation the problem, but that he himself was the problem. For even in a school full of people exactly like him he was still the same loser that he was in his mother’s basement.

And he was under no illusions that that was exactly what his teammates saw in him; nothing. No potential. Just a space holder to bring the numbers up.

Super speed was incredible. That’s how Peter acknowledged jobs well done, he praised his speed but never himself. He just saved Charles and Erik from a room full of armed guards? No that wasn’t him, that was simply his speed. He saved an entire mansion full of people from a potentially fatal explosion? Nothing special, Kurt probably could’ve done the same.

Forget all of the good deeds and saved lives because the bottom line of it all, to him at least, was that all he was good for was cheeky one liners and hopeless kleptomania.

His life took a turn for the worse when he found himself being mind controlled in an alternate universe. And even then, he was playing the part of someone that wasn’t him, the thought humbled him, reconnected him to his roots and reintroduced him to his life long philosophy that he’d never be anything more than a social pariah. Not even an alternate reality could accept him for who he was. There wasn’t a warm welcome and despite not knowing what was going on, the definition of “imposter” or the weirder, “recast”, still shot to kill.

He settled on the notion that he was an inter dimensional waste of space. At least in WestView he could be blissfully ignorant, let the real him be drowned mercilessly in favour of being an integral part of someone’s life- to feel important, even if it wasn’t real.

When WestView fell apart he was completely lost. In every sense of the word. In a new world with no way home and as it turned out, nobody was looking for him. Although he didn’t expect anyone to care, it still stung that nobody did. He always hoped that one day Erik would step up as a father figure for him, this; getting kidnapped and smuggled into a different dimension, seemed like the perfect moment for that epic father son moment, but it wouldn’t surprise Peter if his father has yet to notice his disappearance.

But then, seemingly out of nowhere, he came into contact with a beacon of hope. A guiding star that might possibly lead him to an existence consisting of something other than misery and self loathing.

It offered him a choice; return to being the self proclaimed loser he was known as or start fresh as someone new and mysterious, with first impressions yet to be made and conclusions about him yet to be drawn. Peter had known himself to be rash in the past, when it came to making decisions he had the tendency to act impulsively, never putting too much thought into how his decisions would affect his life in the long term. The choice before him now is no different, he knew exactly what he wanted going forward, however selfish the choice may have been, the second he realised it was an option his heart was set on it.

That previously mentioned beacon of hope arrived to him in the form of a girl, in the form of you. An ex-avenger and close friend of Wanda’s, you were hired by S.W.O.R.D to help them clean up the more ‘sensitive’ fallout that the fall of WestView brought about. Obviously, they were sticking you- the only other avenger with magik- on babysitting and rehabilitation rather than letting you go after your best friend who had gone completely off the rails. Having said that though, you didn’t want anyone else handling him.

You hadn’t watched WandaVision, nor were you even aware that any of it was going on until it had reached a boiling point and you got a call from Monica Rambeau, she’d begged you to come and wait on the edge of town while she went in and act as her eyes on the outside along with Jimmy Woo.

That’s where you stayed until the hex broke down.

As soon as the barrier came down the base you manned was overrun by an armada of terribly confused and distressed citizens, Monica and Wanda were not among them but in their places stumbled in Darcy and the man playing the role of Pietro.

Jimmy appointed himself to Darcy, who in all honesty seemed relatively unscathed by the situation while you made a beeline for the dirty blonde charading as your former, dead teammate.

Peter was, to put it simply, completely enthralled by you as soon as you’d strolled over to him and in the moment he’d put his almost magnetic attraction to you down to the fact that you were the first friendly face he’d seen upon breaking free of Agatha’s possession.

But one thing in particular struck him; you’d asked him his name. You hadn’t immediately assumed him to be some knock off Pietro, as everyone else had. You acknowledged that he had his own personal identity and despite how often he caught himself hating the person he was, he found that when it was torn away from him that he wanted it back. The simple question you posed gave him the opportunity to regain his identity.

“Peter. My name is Peter.” He answered you, almost unsure of himself and you found your interest in the man piqued even further.

He remembered with perfect clarity the way you’d offered him a grin, tilted your hand, extended your hand and said, “Well it’s nice to meet you, Peter. Come on, I’ll be your babysitter for the next while.” There was something about the way you’d laughed after saying the words and the slight, yet unmistakable, glint of mischief in your eyes that had him captivated from the get go.

With you came a whirlwind of new emotions. After only a few weeks of knowing you, Peter noticed he wasn’t as lonely as he had been back home. He didn’t hate himself half as much either, he wasn’t entirely free of self deprovative tendencies and maybe he never would be, but undoubtedly, he likes himself more in this world than he ever had in his last. He thanked you and your determination to make him “a functioning member of society” for that.

It didn’t feel belittling, the way you helped him. You hadn’t dragged him to your favourite mall every weekend just to taunt him about how he couldn’t stop himself from stealing something. Even the very first time, when he’d sped away from you and returned within a second adoring a pair of freshly stolen sunglasses. Your only reaction had been to laugh and casually place your hands on both sides of his face.

“At least remember to take the tag off next time, speedy.” You’d muttered, subtly pulling the tacky stickers off the arms of his shades. No, you weren’t dragging him sight seeing or forcing him to help you go clothes shopping because you thought he was a loser who needed reforming you were doing it because you were a true friend who wanted him to succeed.

The pair of you seemed like two peas in a pod. Which to be fair, you were. Peter Maximoff intrigued you in every sense of the word. He was new, quite literally other worldly, he was kind, he was funny, he was perfectly mischievous and completely wonderful.

What caught your eye the most was the way he held himself, as if he wasn’t entirely comfortable in his own skin. It became apparent to you that he lacked confidence with the phrases he usually tacked onto the ends of his sentences. When you’d invite him to hang out in the beginning his response would always be something along the lines of, “Sure. If you want me to.” But the excitable puppy dog eyes told you that he was dying for someone to want him to tag along some place.

There was a certain understanding between you. You were both more than accustomed with the harrowing feeling of being alone and even though you’d never exactly voiced those thoughts with each other, you couldn’t deny that his was a spirit kindred to your own and he felt it too.

Since the Avengers has disbanded, one of your best friends, Natasha, was dead and your other best friend, Wanda, was gone completely off the rails and the people chasing her wouldn’t let you anywhere near her or even attempt to help pull her out of her darkness. You were being kept as a wildcard in case they needed her taken down. Peter was no stranger to the feeling of being cast aside and so he quickly responded to your frustrations, and in doing so, forced himself out of his comfort zone to be there for you. To his complete shock though, you’d been so appreciative of his efforts.

You never failed to thank him for the little things he did for you, always complimenting his mutation when he’d use it and giving him the recognition he never received at home. The friendship he formed with you was so… two sided, again, something he wasn’t accustomed to before. It didn’t involve him giving everything he had to offer and receiving nothing in return, you matched his energy meticulously and never left him hanging.

In a series of firsts, he didn’t wonder whether or not you genuinely liked him, never feeling the need or want to question it as you’d left him with no reason to doubt.

As he walked around the mall with you now, his mind brought his attention back to the question you’d asked him rather casually a few nights ago. You were both lounging on your couch, watching some ridiculous reality show (a favourite of yours and Peter’s) when you’d turned your head to look at him, a thoughtful look on your face. “Do you think when S.W.O.R.D figures the technology out to crack into other realities, you’ll go back to yours?”

The question had taken him aback for a second, in all honesty, he hadn’t thought about going home, not when he was with you at least and considering he’d become your roommate about three weeks after he got out of WestView, the thought of returning to his old life had barely crossed his mind.

Being an ex-Avenger you were fairly well off, you lived alone in a two bedroom apartment in New York that you’d bought to be closer to Stark tower. Peter had nowhere to go and aside from having a spare room to offer you’d also been sort of lost in the current of the busy city with everyone you once loved in the area either dead, on the run or busy elsewhere.

While the question hadn’t crossed Peter’s mind, it had crossed yours on several occasions. He’d been staying with you for six months and the moment you realised that he was becoming one of the most important people in your life, the thought of him leaving you too weighed on your mind but at the end of the day you wanted him to feel happy. He deserved to feel happy and if going back to his reality brought him that happiness then you’d support him.

“Dunno,” he’d replied, turning to face you, chucking a handful of popcorn at you when you looked incredulous at his response, “To be honest I haven’t really thought about it, m’way too busy babysitting you anyway.” He joked, effortlessly dodging the few pieces of popcorn you attempted to throw at him.

For the last few nights, the question haunted him, but it wasn’t just the question that was bothering him. You were at the forefront of his mind as he replayed the past six months of his life which also happened to be the best six months of his life. WestView put him through hell but coming out the other side of it and meeting you felt like heaven.

He weighed up the pros and cons of returning to his native timeline. The cons: he’d have to leave you behind, he’d go back to being the loser who nobody took seriously, his talents would be downplayed and disregarded and he’d inevitably end up revisiting his lifestyle of solitude. Then there was the pros: he’d get to reunite with his pac man machine. He couldn’t manage to think up anything else.

If he stayed he’d have everything he ever wanted and needed. You’d be there and he knew you always would be, besides he couldn’t leave you knowing that you needed him. If he left who would wake you up when you had night terrors about the catastrophe that your reality was still recovering from? There would be nobody there to comfort you when you woke up from the nightmares, reliving the deaths of Natasha, Tony or Vision and the experience of being snapped out of existence? If he wasn’t there to make you laugh when you were about to cry then who would be? In his heart of hearts he knew you had a huge support system at your disposal, he’d met most of them. Even though he was well aware that Sam visited you as often as he could, that Bucky wrote you letters on a monthly basis and sometimes tagged along with Sam on his visits, that Stephen Strange appeared in your apartment whenever the urge struck him, that the literal god of thunder invited you out for beer whenever he was visiting Earth, that the little spider-kid, also named Peter, swung by your apartment at least once a week to tell you all about school and his good deeds. Despite knowing all of this and knowing all of these people loved you dearly, Peter wanted to be your main source of support, he didn’t want to be someone who came and went, who’d love you then leave you. He wanted to be with you through anything and everything and the feeling that you’d love him for a lifetime had him satisfied with the decision he was about to make.

If leaving his old life meant he could stay here, with you, and experience happiness for more than a fleeting moment then he’d simply; leave it all behind.

“I’ve been thinking about what you asked me the other night.” He spoke through a mouthful of curly fries. You were sitting in the food court of the mall when he decided to let you in on his desire to stay with you indefinitely.

You raised your eyebrow, “You? Putting thought into an answer? Peter, I think I’m starting to become a bad influence on you.” You told him teasingly, taking a long sip of your drink as he rolled his eyes humorously.

“You’re a terrible influence which is exactly why I’ve decided to stay here and put you on the straight and narrow.” The glee you felt at his statement was undeniable, your eyes lit up and your lips curled upwards.

“You’re staying? Really staying?” Your smile was contagious, Peter’s face now painted with a wide grin as he nodded his head.

In a moment of weakness he frantically added, “Y’know only if you want me to though. If you don’t that’s completely cool.” He rushed through the words, feeling more embarrassed when the fond look on your face never faded.

“Of course I want you to stay. You mean a lot to me.” You reassured him, a gentle smile on your lips as you reached across the metal table, intertwining your fingers with his.

Peter squeezed your hand gratefully, holding it in his grasp securely and allowing his smile to return to his face, “I know. You mean a lot to me too.” It was somewhat of an understatement, he was starting to understand that you didn’t just mean a lot, but that you meant everything.

His resolution lifted a huge weight off your shoulders that you wouldn’t be losing yet another best friend. You were glad he’d be with you when everything blew over with Wanda, the two of them definitely had the potential to develop a beautiful sibling relationship and they both deserved that. Of course, Peter would never replace Pietro and having known them both it was obvious just how different the two men were, the only thing they had in common being their powers and last name. Still, he and Wanda would still be able to work on it. He didn’t hate her after WestView and you knew Wanda well enough to know that she was kind hearted and she’d be more than willing to give him a chance. When she eventually comes back to her senses, that it.

As the months went on, life with you and Peter seemed to only get better. You never stopped laughing, your nightmares died down and Peter had taken on a whole new lease of life. Yourself and Peter were the perfect example of meeting the right person at the right time, you balanced each other out and accentuated the other’s good qualities.

Peter could now say with complete confidence that he was happy and what’s more is that he was finally sure that he was making someone happy.

Up until nearly eleven months of living together your relationship had been purely platonic, save for the constant flirting but flirtation pretty much ran in yours and Peter’s blood. Peter wasn’t going to lie to himself, he’d fallen for you the second you’d peeled the security tags off his stolen sunglasses.

You, on the other hand, had been fighting with yourself because yes, you love Peter but you couldn’t have told him when there was the possibility he’d eventually leave and now so much time has passed and you’ve got such a good thing going you didn’t have it in you to ruin it.

However, all of that changed when your original Maximoff best friend came knocking on your door.

Wanda was on the run. She’d caused an amazing amount of chaos but Stephen Strange and S.W.O.R.D were hot on her trail and now she needed a place to lay low with the twins. She figured there was no place more reliable to go than to the always open arms of her best friend, who conveniently had a divinity for earth magik and could muster up a protective barrier without raising suspicions. And that’s exactly where she found herself; outside your door.

You’d been chasing Peter around the apartment when you heard the knock on the door. Peter was on the opposite end of the kitchen to you, using the bar as a shield from you. “You better get that.”

“Oh you’d like that wouldn’t you?” You glared as you spoke, it was his own fault really. What sort of idiot jumpscares a witch while she’s mid-meditation? He’d frightened you so badly you accidentally blasted a ball of your signature green energy and ruined your favourite couch throw pillow. When you were ready to pounce on the scared speedster the knocks sounded again, more frantic this time.

With one last glare towards Peter you stomped towards the door. Your anger melted away completely when you saw her. Her hood was up and she looked completely exhausted, two small hooded little boys by her side.

“Wanda…” You breathed out, relief flooding your system at the sight of her alive. She didn’t get a chance to speak before your arms were pulling her against you tightly, hugging her as if your life depended on it. Wanda returned in your embrace, allowing herself to relax for the first time in nearly a year, she sniffled against your shoulder, holding back tears as she realised how much she’d truly missed you.

Billy and Tommy watched in confusion as their mother cried into your shoulder. They didn’t know who you were, all their mother had told them was that they were going somewhere safe.

It was the yell of one of the boys that caused you and Wanda to separate, “Uncle P!” With that you felt a familiar rush of air across your leg but instead of Peter appearing one of the kids was gone.

You shared a perplexed look with Wanda, although your confusion was for different reasons.

“Hey hell raisers!” Peter responded, catching the mini speedster who all but threw himself at him barely regaining his balance before the other child had flung himself into the hug.

“Wanda? Those two… are they...?” You started, at a loss for words Wanda cut you off quietly, her tone as disbelieving as yours.

“My children? Yes. Is that…?” You nodded your head numbly, anticipating the end of her question.

“Your fake brother? Yeah.” Quickly, you realised you and a wanted woman catching up with the door wide open wasn’t ideal and you ushered Wanda inside, shutting the door when she walked in.

“Hey.” Peter greeted her simply, as if he hadn’t been used as a meat puppet in her altered reality. It wasn’t in his nature to hold any grudges.

“Hi?” Wanda replied, her voice still twinged with confusion.

“Peter, will you keep an eye on the kids for a bit? Wanda and I have some catching up to do.” You asked him with a nervous laugh, just thankful that Wanda was too tired to argue with your suggestion.

Peter ruffled the boys’ hair and gave you a grin, “Only if you stop trying to kill me.”

You rolled your eyes as you began to lead Wanda into your bedroom, “You’re on probation, jerk.” You called over your shoulder.

Once you were securely in your bedroom, the door locked and sitting comfortably you fixed Wanda with an amused look, “I’d ask you what’s new but I’m not sure I even wanna know.”

Wanda gave you a sad smile while she shook her head, “No, you probably don’t. I will tell you tomorrow, I don’t want to get into it tonight. I’m so tired.” She admitted, her voice overcome with sadness.

“I’ll pump up the air mattress and you and the boys can sleep in here for however long you need. I’d offer you the spare room but that’s where Peter’s been staying and I don’t think empty food containers are the kind of decor you’d be into.” Wanda nodded, squeezing your hand gratefully.

“So his name is Peter?” She asked, curious about the man Agatha had used to trick her in WestView.

You nodded in confirmation, “Yeah. Peter Maximoff, actually.”

Wanda’s brows came to a furrow at that, “Maximoff? So he’s a relation?”

“Yes and no. Peter is from a different reality but he’s still a Maximoff and he’s got super speed. So, and this is just my theory, while you’re not directly related he could still be your brother- if you wanted him to.” You explained, as gently as you could, not trying to push her too far but to nudge the idea in her direction.

Wanda, to your surprise, didn't seem to hate the suggestion, “What is he like?”

A genuine smile made it onto your face then, as you shot into your description of your roommate, “He’s caring, funny, a little bit of a kleptomaniac but he’s working on it. He’s understanding and moronically selfless, moronic in the sense that he doesn’t even realise he’s being selfless. Huge pain in the ass too.” Wanda had a soft smile on her face by the time you’d finished.

“You like him.” Was all she said and you let out a laugh in disbelief, standing up and opening the door.

“Go grab a shower. I’ll have Peter blow up the air mattress while I go introduce myself to my god sons.”

“I thought you’d at least wait until I actually asked you.” Wanda laughed as you walked out of the room.

Things moved fairly quickly after that. As promised you introduced yourself to Billy and Tommy as their god mother, which they seemed more than thrilled about and you assumed that excitement had to do with whatever description of you Peter had given them. Wanda and the twins were all cleaned and fed and had all but collapsed into bed, foregoing the air mattress and huddling together in your double bed instead.

“Where are you sleeping, mother Teresa?” Peter teased as he noticed your eyes drooping where you stood.

“On the couch probably. Or the air mattress.” You mumbled, cutting yourself off with a yawn.

Peter, unimpressed with your options, scoffed, “No way. Come on, you can bunk with me.”

Much like Wanda, you were too tired to argue and you let Peter pull you to his, surprisingly clean, room by the hand.

You both crawled into the bed, lying close together despite the amount of empty space on the mattress.

“How are you feeling about all of this?” Your soft voice broke through the silence and Peter turned his head to look at you.

“About Wanda?” You nodded your head, watching him intently as he rolled onto his side, facing you more comfortably.

Peter shrugged lightly, “I’m feeling ok. Just glad the twins still see me as their cool uncle.” You let out a small laugh at his response.

“Wanda was asking about you. Seemed interested in getting to know the real you.” You informed him, your heartwarming as you watched a hopeful look fall across his face.

A lull settled over the room once again and Peter caught himself staring at you. His eyes drifted over every visible part of you, reminding him of most of the points on his pros list for staying in your universe; your eyes, your lashes, your nose, your lips, you.

“What’re you thinking about?” The sound of your tired voice pulled him out of his thoughts and ultimately pushed him to bite the bullet and tell you how he’s feeling. With you curled up beside him, in his bed, fighting sleep just to stay in his company for as long as you could; he knew there would be no better time.

“Just about how happy I am to be here with you.” He answered you honestly, the butterflies in both of your stomachs fluttering in sync at his words.

You trailed a hand under the duvet and onto the bedsheets between your bodies, feeling around until you found his hand and gently intertwined your fingers. “I’m happy you decided to stay.”

“What you’ve all gone through in this timeline sucks- don’t get me wrong-“ Peter started sincerely, scooting closer to you and dropping his head back down on the edge of your pillow, leaving the pair of you practically nose to nose as he went on.

“And I hate that Wanda had to go through so much… but I’m really glad that it led me to you.” Peter swore in that moment, right after the confession left his mouth, that he could die right now and be completely content knowing that you now knew how he felt.

His heart stopped, and he thought that maybe he was about to die, when you gave him the softest, sweetest smile he’d ever been on the receiving end of and whispered, “I feel the same.”

Time moved in slow motion as he felt you moving your intertwined hands towards your lips, your lips pressed gently against the back of Peter’s hand before you brought them to rest against your chest.

It was a fact to say that Peter Maximoff had never felt intimacy quite like this before. But, experiencing it now, with you, led him to wonder how he’d ever survived without it. He wasn’t sure whether it was natural to crave more, especially when the affection you were showing him was so gentle, but he didn’t care as he let the impulsive side of him take over.

Not sparing another word, Peter closed the small distance between your lips and his. His free hand cupped your jaw while yours wasted no time in getting tangled in his silver hair.

His lips moved softly and surprisingly slowly over yours and he savoured the feeling of your hand holding his while your other got lost in his hair, your body pressed up against him, the way your jaw moved against his palm as you reciprocated the movement of his lips and the taste of your lips, promising himself he’d never let the memory slip from his mind for as long as he lived.

With complete clarity, Peter could say he had felt true, genuine happiness and he had no doubt in his mind that there was absolutely nothing Charles, Hank, Scott or anyone else from his original timeline could say to make him leave this happiness behind. Because in the process of forgetting his old life, he couldn’t deny that he has undoubtedly found himself in the position of a man who had so much more to live for.

#peter maximoff #peter maximoff x reader #peter maximoff imagine #wanda maximoff x reader #wandavision x reader #wandavision spoilers #x men x reader #avengers x reader #marvel x reader #mcu #pietro maximoff #pietro maximoff x reader

625 notes · View notes

itsclydebitches · 3 years

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I think that regarding RWBY criticism people are defensive because there are a lot of people who dont like the show and actively shit talk it for whatever reason. We agree on that and we agree there are people who criticize the show because they like it and want it to be "better" (whatever that means to them.) Now feel free to disagree with me on this part but i think part of the reason the people who have genuine criticism often get disregarded and labeled a hater is because, at least to me, they dont provide a solution to the problems they have or do so in a way that can be interpreted as self-righteous and condescending. Its like if a teacher got mad at a student for not understanding the material rather than trying to explain it differently, it just creates another issue.

I think the reason why critics don't provide a solution is the same reason why that comparison doesn't work for me: we are not RT's teachers. We are the consumers of their product. Whereas a teacher has a responsibility to do everything possible to help a student get better at their subject (the thing they're paid to do), it is not the viewers' responsibility to do everything possible to help RT get better at writing (we're paying them). To my mind, it really is enough to say, "This is bad" and leave it at that. The same way if I order a meal at a restaurant, I'm allowed to go, "Wow. That tasted awful and I'm upset about it because I expected better." If my dinner companion went, "Well, why was it bad? Too cold? Not enough seasoning? Prove to me these failings exist because I'm not inclined to take you at your word. And more importantly, what's your solution here? I'm not going to take this complaint seriously unless you have a good plan for how to fix this dish" I'd be like, "... what am I supposed to do? March into the kitchen and teach the chef myself?"

We're under no obligation to fix RT's mistakes and, even if we were, how exactly are a bunch of fans meant accomplish that? What literal, practical action does anyone expect fans to take to ensure that the changes they want to see in RWBY actually come about? There's nothing you can do. However, despite this, many fans do suggest changes that they think would benefit the story, with the hope that the writers — who are very active on social media and engage a great deal with their fans — will see and take note. There have been times throughout the series where it does appear like they saw some of the more common complaints... only to then swerve right back towards their original writing decisions. Ren's Volume 8 arc is an example of that. So is Jaune's focus in the finale. Many in the fandom said, "I want to see the group held responsible for their bad decisions. I want Jaune to take a backseat so the girls can get more development. I think these choices will help alleviate many of the criticisms we've had" and RT did that... only to pull back on both changes at the last second. Obviously there's no way to know their intentions there, whether it's a coincidence they toyed with ideas the fandom has frequently discussed, or whether they actually tossed them in to try and appease critics with no real plans to take those changes seriously, but for the purposes of this discussion it amounts to the same: fans said "Doing this specific thing will make the story better, with 'better' defined as us deriving more enjoyment from it" and RT didn't do the thing. So, where are you supposed to go from there? Storm RT headquarters and make them take writing classes? Frankly, it's ridiculous to think that fans need or could do anything at all, making solutions a needless requirement.

To say nothing of how this comes across as another lose-lose situation. You say that critics should provide solutions to these problems in order to be taken seriously. You also say that if they do provide solutions, they tend to come across as "self-righteous and condescending." Pardon my skepticism, but it sounds like there isn't a version of criticism that's going to meet with your approval, or if it exists, it's an incredibly narrow pocket. Criticism is dismissed if there's no solution attached, but if you do provide a solution, make sure you don't sound too confident in the changes you want to make. That doesn't sound very doable to me. It just sounds like a catch-all way to dismiss criticism as a whole, either because a post didn't meet the first, arbitrary requirement, or did so in a tone the recipient decides they don't like (which is always subjective. Any post can be read as "self-righteous" if you decide that's the route you want to go. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy). And I do see this a lot. For a transformative fandom like any other, the RWBY community has a strangely hostile attitude towards rewrites, with many fans considering it "self-righteous" to think that anyone could write RWBY better than RT, and that a rewrite's existence is "condescending" towards the writers. If I actually gave a detailed account of not just my problems with the story, but also the specific changes needed to improve it (many of which, notably, require a reworking of the mechanics and world building from the very start), there's a very good chance that would still be dismissed because people would interpret it as too arrogant. "Look at her, thinking she's better than professional, successful writers. What massively popular stories have you published lately? Yeah, that's what I thought. God I hate critics, they're so pretentious." If you don't provide solutions you're being too negative and don't actually want the story to succeed. If you provide solutions you're too arrogant and insulting the writers by daring to think that you could do better. So again: lose-lose.

But as said, solutions shouldn't be necessary. It's great if you come up with some, but figuring out how to fix a product's failings is not a requirement for voicing grievances with that product. I don't need to know how to build a better computer to be upset if mine suddenly fails. I don't need to know how to bake muffins to grimace if the one I'm eating tastes off. And you don't need to know how to write a webseries to be unhappy with how RWBY is going. If we were in a position of responsibility with RT, like a teacher, then yeah, totally different situation. But they're producing something that they expect fans to pay for, whether it's through First accounts, merch, cons, etc. or, payment aside, they nevertheless hope to receive attention and praise for this product. The flipside of that is that people might not like what you're selling. You can be displeased with the quality of a webseries purchase in precisely the same way you can be displeased with the quality of a meal. No Gordon Ramsey-level knowledge required.

#rwby #rwde #mymetas

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snootsnoot-fiction · 3 years

Text

I Heart You

Pairing: Denny Duquette x reader

Warnings: Mention of death, reference to sex (this was meant to be an aftercare fic but turned into general fluff mostly)

A/n: This is another birthday gif for @lemonboy-milo its officially been a year since i wrote my first ever fic as well, all for this gay boi, I hope your day is as good as can be

Summary: Denny can finally really look after you since his surgery...

It had been a long, and difficult few months to say the least. A heart transplant was no small feet. Nor was everything that came after. There was always a chance of the host body rejecting a new organ.

You were scared for weeks after Denny’s operation. You were more than grateful for his second chance of course - he was almost at the end of his rope on life before receiving this heart - but you were also way too aware that things could be snatched away when you least expect it.

Needless to say, no matter how strong you tried to stay for your man, it was you that ended up needing most comfort. Denny, as much as he hated the idea of leaving you, had personally made peace long ago with the strong possibility of death.

You had your moments of course. Moments when visiting in the hospital where you would be stronger than ever. It broke you to see him as he was, but you loved him with everything you had. So long as Denny Duquette was alive, you were okay. He was fighting for you, it was only fair you fought for him too.

After the transplant operation, Doctor Burke had gone over what was to come with you and Denny. The average recovery from a heart transplant was at least six months. So, when the man was finally able to go home a few weeks later, you took time off work to make sure you could do anything and everything for him at such a pivotal time. He was no longer in the hospital, and you didn’t want to take any chances.

Denny Duquette tried to get you to relax at times. Of course, he wouldn’t always succeed, but whenever he did, he made sure to promise to not do much. The amount you cared for him and his healing was something he would absolutely never take advantage of. Plus, the sooner he recovered, the better.

The man hated not being able to look after you. That was his one job in life - make sure you were alright. In all the events that occurred thanks to his bad heart, however, he had eventually learnt that taking care of himself was taking care of you. Naturally, he still had his bad times, but it was all worth it to prolong your life together, and keep you happy.

You had met Denny at the Seattle Grace hospital. He had struck up a conversation while the both of you were waiting in line at the coffee cart. His heart problems were mentioned, and ever since then you had been worried about him and anything relating to his heart. The man even gave you his coffee so you didn’t have to buy one after you expressed concern.

The two of you had been in intimate situations before, but never full on intercourse. As much as you wanted it at times, not only were you scared about his heart, but you were shy. All that mattered to Denny was that you were comfortable and okay. ‘When you’re ready darlin’ he would say. When his heart got worse and he got his new one, you would suggest you’d be ready when he was fully recovered, but he’d always gently turn you down, insisting you had to be ready. To be comfortable. To truly want it.

That being said, it happened so naturally. It was perfect and everything you could have imagined and more. It had been about seven months since the surgery, and the man wanted to treat you. The perfect indoor date, just the two of you. He went all out, even pretending to drop you off back home at the bedroom door. It was in that moment, as you looked into his loving eyes, emotion swelled up inside you like a hurricane. Before you knew it, you had pulled him in for a passionate kiss.

The rest, as they say, was history. At least it was up until now. You were laying in Denny’s arms, completely naked and content for the first time in your life. All your worries, in this moment, were nowhere to be found as this man held you to his bare chest.

“How’s my Y/N?” He asked softly as his thumb rubbed circles into your arm and he placed a kiss upon your head.

“Mmm great…” You murmured softly as you watched your own hand just sitting on his torso. “How are you?” You asked after a few moments, looking up at him. He knew you were thinking about his heart.

“I’m fine baby,” he spoke with a smile as he lifted one hand to cup your face, “more than fine. I love you so much dollface.” His words made you blush and you began to look away, but he gently grabbed your chin between his thumb and forefinger, making you look at him again. “You’ve done so much for me this past year.. I am more than thankful for that.” All you could do was smile shyly and blush harder. He simply chuckled.

“What are you doing?” You whimpered when Denny slowly started to move.

“I’m looking after you.” He stated matter-of-factly as he gently laid you back down and stood up from the bed, pulling his underwear back on. “Uh- no no no!” The words came out firmly as he leaned over to press a hand to your shoulder when you started to move.

“I should be looking after you…” You pouted at him.

“Baby doll you need to relax okay?” His hand moved to cup your cheek again. “You have been looking after me since we first met, let me really look after you for once, yeah?” He waited, not wanting to let you get up. You could see the seriousness in his eyes. The love and desire to be his normal self again.

“Okay..” you eventually managed to mumble as you laid back as you were. Smiling, Denny’s hand brushed down your arm, grabbed your hand, and pulled it up to his lips for a kiss. His eyes sparkling with happiness as he looked at you.

After another moment, the man let go as he grabbed the sheets to pull them over your nude form. You grabbed the sheets eagerly, hugging them up to your chin.

“You need anything?” He questioned as he stood straight again.

“Just you.. cuddles..” your words made him chuckle softly.

“Is my baby thirsty?” The man gave you a firm look, making you nod ever so slightly. “I’ll just get you some water, okay? Then we can cuddle.”

You listened to the sound of his footsteps and the clink of glasses as he retrieved one from the cupboard. A grin creeped on your face as the seconds passed and you expected him to walk back in. The tiniest squeal left you when he reappeared, causing the widest smile yet to spread across his face and yet another blush to spread across yours.

“Here.” Denny moved to sit on his side of the bed before handing you the glass. He watched as you downed the water. “Very thirsty.” He commented as you placed the glass on the bedside table. You wasted no time in holding up the bed sheets and patting his spot, silently commanding him to now cuddle. “So impatient!” The man chuckled again as he slid under the covers with you.

Instead of cuddling right away, he laid on his side facing you, grabbing your hands and holding them to his chin.

“How did I ever get so lucky huh?” Letting one of his hands go, Denny stroked your hair with such affection you could have melted and fallen into a puddle on the floor.

“I don’t know..” you squirmed slightly, not used to someone caring for you like the man in front of you did.

“C’mere…” Letting go of your hands, he opened his arms. You squealed excitedly again, causing him to chuckle, as you turned around and wiggled back into him. Little spoon that you were. His arms closed tightly around you as he pulled you further into him as he breathed in your scent and let out a long, satisfied sigh.

“Y/N… I dont think you know just how much I appreciate everything you have done for me, especially over these last few months,” he whispered into your ear. You could hear everything he felt hanging on his every word. “I haven’t been able to look after you as well as I would’ve liked, but now with this new heart, I can do that and love you twice as hard as I ever did.. So I hope you know what you’ve gotten yourself in for darlin’.” He nuzzled his face into the back of your neck.

“I love you too Denny baby.” Your words portrayed how soft he had made you feel. This man, who was unable to be the man he usually was for so long, had every intention of looking after you in every sense. You stuck with him all this time, helped him through all the bad, and now he was back to full strength, he was going to do the exact same for his precious baby doll.

#Jeffrey Dean Morgan #denny duquette #jdm #greys anatomy #denny x reader #denny duquette fluff #jdm fluff #birthday present #aftercare

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deonideatta · 3 years

Text

OK I've gotten through the 7 stages of grief, here are my arguments for and against Han Seo and his 'betrayal'

I do think it’s possible that Han Seo just decided to betray Vincenzo, though i don’t like the thought and I hope this isn’t the case. The greatest evidence for it is the way he acts. The way he reacted to Vincenzo pulling the gun on him did not seem faked, nor did his reaction to Mr Han’s smug announcement that he had found a way to off Vincenzo. It is worth noting that we do see what appears to be a moment of hesitation on his part before he enthusiastically praises Mr. Han for covering all their bases. For the last part of the episode all of Han Seo’s behaviour says that he’s betrayed Vincenzo for real (right down to him not telling Jipuragi squad about Mr Han’s promotion), but that doesn’t really mean anything if you argue that it’s all part of a wider plan, and that he’s just acting. So besides just taking his actions at face value, there’s also the point that there is no point to it being a plot? Like what do Vincenzo and Han Seo stand to gain from staging a betrayal and having Vincenzo get shot in front of Interpol?? What would the benefit of that be? (Edit: OK so someone told me that it might be to delay interpol deporting vincenzo so that they could work on clearing his name, and that gives a lot of support to the theory of it being a plot) Please enlighten me if I'm missing something here because it seems to me that the only entity that benefits from everything is Babel, as now their biggest pain in the neck is gone. This gives Han Seo every reason to actually betray Vincenzo, especially since it was in a setting where he felt backed up (Interpol waiting in the wings). He’s managed to take back the chairman position, oust his brother, and his right hand man (Mr. Han) is the chief prosecutor. Technically he doesn’t need Vincenzo to ensure his safety anymore, nor does he really have to keep helping him by leaking info, since it’d be fighting against his own company now. Plus Vincenzo already seems to have a plan in place, which he entrusted to Cha Young earlier in the episode. Not to mention Vincenzo getting shot, and how genuinely shocked he seemed. So perhaps Han Seo really will just be another example of how greed corrupts the best of intentions, a second Prosecutor Jung. Unless all of it is a ploy on Han Seo's part?

Which it might well be bc nothing is ever as it seems with this drama, so here are some points on why Han Seo’s betrayal might not be as simple as that.

Firstly we've seen so much character development for Han Seo, and it seemed like at some point the drama really began to try to endear him to us. He's clumsy, he's not very bright, he's funny, he's the underdog, we pity him and want him to succeed. We see him join up with Jipuragi squad, we see his quest to be liked and to come out of the shadow of his brother and his abuse. He’s flawed, but we grow attached to him, and we like him. Of course, you can argue that all this is to make the betrayal hurt even more later on. But just like the NIS director's buildup as a trustworthy character from the beginning was a good basis for assuming he wasn't on the wrong side, this could be the case for Han Seo too (though whether or not his character was ever built up as trustworthy is debatable). Prosecutor Jung’s betrayal already showed us that we can’t trust anyone, so why give us that again using Han Seo?

Secondly, that first hockey scene and how much Han Seo has come to idolize Vincenzo. We see how happy he is in the scene where they play hockey together, and how lighthearted their chatting is. We even get Is This Love played during the scene (lol). Han Seo is playful around Vincenzo in a way he can’t really be with anyone else, and from what we’ve seen, he really values that. I mean, look at the way he skated around like a gleeful child after Vincenzo left, and the way he called out grazie after him. As well as their interactions in the previous episodes, like when 80s Han Seo appears to brag about how he risked his own safety to save Geumga Plaza. Before the last 15 minutes of this episode Han Seo is a huge Vincenzo fanboy, and you can argue that he wouldn’t suddenly do a 180 like that. There’s also the fact that Vincenzo said he would kill Han Seo only if he betrayed him. The fact that that was the only condition he gave makes it even more significant if Han Seo has actually betrayed him. It having been said that that was the one thing he shouldn’t do, why would he go ahead and do just that? I mean, you could argue that Vincenzo mentioning betrayal was foreshadowing, both for Han Seo’s actual betrayal and thus his eventual death, but we’re trying to look on the bright side here lol Edit: ok so my memory is actually garbage and he never said that, disregard that bit lol

There’s also little things like the clip that shows Han Seo calling Vincenzo from a car wearing different clothes (why would they have a whole wardrobe change and shot of him in the car for a 3 second shot of him basically just saying “we need to talk” when they could have just had him call from the ice? so there is most likely a longer scene in the car), the fact that Vincenzo showed up with a gun (maybe it was just bc they were suspicious about the fact that Han Seo didn’t report on Mr Han’s promotion), or the fact that the movement Vincenzo made with the gun before he got shot was kinda odd. And perhaps most notably, Han Seo wondering who out of Vincenzo and Han Seok would come out on top in the end.

But truly, I dont know what to think. I definitely think we’re not getting the full story, but i’m not sure if that story is going to be good on Han Seo’s part. I really want to believe that it’s somehow all a ploy, but to me everything seems to be saying that it’s a real betrayal. Of course, no one can ever accurately predict things in this drama, and this seems like a cheap ending for a character that was sold to the audience so much, so I'd love to be wrong!! If anyone has any insights in either direction, please share!!!!

#i started this post to convince myself that it was all a ploy and it ended up having the opposite effect :')#i am big sad #please if anyone has any points i've missed lmk sdfs i'll take any glimmer of hope #tvn vincenzo #vincenzo #vincenzo kdrama #kdrama #vincenzo meta

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kurooisdbest · 3 years

Note

nickname: carri

men: iwaizumi, tsukishima, konoha

number: 11

TSYM!!!

heyyy Carri! PLS DONT HATE ME IM SORRY IF ITS SUUUPER LATE BUT Thank you for participating hihi🥺

here are your results !

Tsukishima (Friends)

Iwaizumi (Acquaintances)

Konoha (Engaged)

TSUKISHIMA

Your friendship with Tsukishima started when you became a manager for the Karasuno VBC together and withYachi

You were already close with the other 1st years but Tsukishima was a tougher nut to crack

he was always cocky and standoffish, and that ticked you off but you being you, you got used to it and began learning how to bark back at him.

Thus, your battle of insults would turn into a tackling sessions (he was surprised how fast and strong you were, being able to attack him like a predator pouncing on its prey. Little did he know you grew up in a house with three older brothers making you a professional in wrestling matches *for the sake of the story let’s just say u have brothers hehe*), and of course would result to the both of you being lectured by Daichi and Suga

With Daichi getting impatient with the two of you, he always punished the both of you with penalty laps. A day never went by without the both of you running around the gym. Daichi was pleased with the result but he would never admit that. He saw how you and Tsukishima became closer, what began in endless bickering evolved into small chit chats, and he was a proud dad

Your friendship with Tsukishima became one of the most valued relationships you have until present;

It was the end of the MSBY vs Adlers match, and you, together with your batchmates decided to drink after to catch up with one another.

“Tsukiiiiiiiiiii come on pls I’m strong now!” you pouted at your best friend, begging him to allow you to drink.

He knew you were a lightweight, you all discovered that during one of Kuroo and Bokuto’s afterparty, when he had to carry you home after finding you passed out in the corner. Thus, he made you swear to drink only when he or the other boys were around.

His nose scrunched at your incessant begging and groaned, knowing he could never win over you. “Fine since your so ‘strong’” he made sure to make air quotes before continuing. “bring your ass back home on your own.” he deadpanned. You smiled at him brightly before linking your arms with him, dragging him to the bar.

It’s been so long since you guys got together like this. So much untold stories from Hinata’s trip to Brazil, Making fun of Kageyama’s awkward commercials, and of course the story of how Yamaguchi and Yachi got together.

As much as Tsukishima protested, he couldn’t deny that he missed hanging out like this. So much has changed in a small amount of time… except for one.

You were drinking to your heart’s content, naive of the consequences you were about to face the next day. He laughed at the drooling mess beside him and sighed. He brushed the stray hair on your face and smiled.

“I forgot to ask!” Hinata shouted from the other side of the table. “Have you ever confessed t-“ he was cut by Kageyama’s hand covering his mouth. Tsukishima glared at the ginger headed male before standing up. “We’ll be going first.” He dragged your body to stand, before carrying you on his back.

Your head rested on his shoulder as he carried you to his car. The smell of his cologne made your lips curl into a smile before nuzzling your head on his neck. “Thank you, Tsukki. i wuv yyyuuuuuu!!! youuur the bestttt” your words slurred before fully passing out. He clicked his tongue and chuckled lightly. “You’re a pain in the ass you know that?” he looked back at you, seeing how peaceful you were, letting out soft snores, before letting a smile adorn on his face.

IWAIZUMI

You recently moved from Tokyo after your father was reassigned to work in Miyagi

Being an alumnus of Aoba Johsai, he enrolled you there for your third year

Everything was going smooth. Your movers arrived on time, you easily unpacked your furniture, and you had everything you needed to face the new environment you were about to enter

However, what your father forgot to mention was that Aoba Johsai was HUGE

Hence, what would a new transferee like yourself have to go through? of course, Get lost i the vicinity

You applauded yourself mentally for thinking ahead and left for school early or else you would be late on your first day

After dozens of twists and turns you finally reached your classroom

Your homeroom teacher entered and instructed you to introduce yourself in front of the class “Hi, My name is l/n y/n. I transferred here from Nekoma. I hope we could get along.” you ended your introduction with a bow before returning to your seat.

“Thank you. L/n and Iwaizumi, I would like to speak to you both after class.” He stated before continuing with his announcements.

You didn’t know anyone in your school and you couldn’t help but wonder what your teacher wanted to talk to you about with Iwaizumi.

After class, you turn your head to where Iwaizumi was seated to see him asleep on his desk.

“Iwaizumi-san?” you poked his shoulder, trying to wake him up. Take note of the word: “Trying” because it seemed like you wouldn’t succeed with just a mere poke.

He must’ve been tired for him to fall asleep like this. Having no choice, you grabbed both of his shoulders and started shaking him. His body jolted and raised his head from the desk and gave you a confused look. You simply smiled at his reaction and told him how both of you were instructed to meet with your professor after class.

His cheeks slightly flushed in embarrassment for forgetting and for making you wake him up.

In the office, your teacher told Iwaizumi to show you around campus so that you wouldn’t have to get lost next time.

You tried to decline, feeling guilty for making Iwaizumi show you around but despite your attempts to politely decline, Iwaizumi faced you and gave you a gentle smile. “It’s alright. I don’t have practice today anyway. Come on.” He turned his back and walked toward the exit.

However, you were glued there and couldn’t utter a word. You suddenly feel a hand grab yours and pulled you along.

When the both of you exited the office, Iwaizumi let go of your hand and walked ahead, glancing back at you every once in a while to make sure you were following him.

He walked by your side and toured you around the school, telling you facts and what he called “survival” tips. (Tip#1: Never fall for Oikawa. Who was that? you didn’t know. What does it have to do with you? again, you didn’t know fjsjbfjd)

sometimes your hands brush against each other and sometimes he would put an arm around your shoulder bringing you closer when you pass through places with huge crowds.

He explained to you that he didn’t want you to get lost and you let him continue because somehow… even if it’s just your first day, you might just have made your first (crush) friend

KONOHA

You had been together with Konoha for almost 6 years now. A relationship which bloomed and nurtured from middle school until high school

Despite being a year younger than him, his childish antics proved that maybe, just maybe, you were older than him in terms of maturity

He begged you to become a manager right after you became a 1st year in Fukurodani and not missing a chance to spend time with your boyfriend, you agreed.

Both of you were busy with Finals and the volleyball competitions ahead but that didn’t stop you from spending time with your boyfriend. You’re relationship was past the point of fussing over the small issues. You both were in sync with one another and the both of you learned how to handle problems that would occasionally arise.

Everything became a routine. You would spend your breaks with Konoha and the volleyball team, study after classes before training starts, and walk home together after trainings.

Although lately, you’ve been spending time with each other less. Sure, you and Konoha would study in the library together but that was it. You wondered why he would suddenly bail on you without a word, you wondered why he insisted on letting you go home first, and why he would reply late to your texts.

You understood that maybe he was just busy but the stress you were feeling about school was starting to take its toll on you

Your emotions began to heighten. You were feeling lonely and sad, realizing that maybe the spark between you and your boyfriend was slowly fading. That maybe he found someone better. You began feeling insecure, letting your mind wander over every possible scenario about what would happen next. Is this really how your love will end?

You began to shut out everyone. You barely replied to Konoha, you spoke only in a few sentences, and at times, you couldn’t even spare him a glance.

You didn’t want anyone to think you were petty so you opted to keep everything to yourself. It didn’t bother you anymore that you were spending less and less time with Konoha. Instead of feeling hurt, you felt numb.

Little did you know everything was about to change

“l/n-san.” Fukorodani’s setter and your best friend, Akaashi tapped your shoulder. “Hm?” you answered while continuing your homework on the bench without looking at him. “l/n-san.” he repeated. You dropped your pencil to look at him. “Yes?”

“Konoha-san…” he trailed off. “Huh? What happened to Akinori?” you deadpanned. “He fainted. He’s in the infirma-” you rushed to the infirmary, cutting Akaashi off mid-sentence. A surge of concern suddenly filled you and your heart began beating rapidly.

Upon reaching the infirmary door, you slid it open only to notice the lights turned off. You flicked it on and saw no one at the desk. You entered slowly and walked further into the room, scanning the beds, looking for Konoha. At the end of the room, there you saw him. Sitting down, staring at the wall in front of him.

He didn’t seem to notice you enter as you sat yourself down beside him. “Hey Akaashi told me you fainted. Are you okay?” you hesitantly placed your hand on his. “Are you mad at me?” he whispered, eyes still on the wall. “I wouldn’t say I was mad… maybe a little hurt and I felt that you were shutting me out…I didn’t even know what you were up to… What’s up with you lately?” you answered.

“I’m sorry. I just…” he faced you and placed his free hand on your cheek, caressing it. “I didn’t know you felt that way. I was just busy, that’s all.” you leaned into his touch, unaware that you really did miss him. “It’s okay, I understand. What were you busy with? Maybe I could help…” you stared back at him. “I’m not sure if you could” he answered awkwardly while rubbing the back of his neck. “I understand, excuse me” you stood up and feeling your eyes starting to tear up.

Suddenly, you felt upset. What could he be doing that even you couldn’t help with? You were about to turn the doorknob when you felt a familiar warmth grasp your wrist. “Babe…” you muttered, tears slowly streaming down your face. You faced him with your tear-stained face and smiled.

He felt guilty for having to tell you this way. He didn’t want to do it this way but he didn’t have any other choice. “Listen to me, okay?” He grabbed both of your cheeks in his hands, making you look at him. You stared at him and nodded.

“I’m so sorry for hurting you the for the past weeks… I wanted to surprise you that was all.” he cooed before releasing your cheeks. He rummaged something in his blazer and took out a small box. “This isn’t anything fancy but I’m graduating soon, and I have to wait a year before being in the same campus as you again. Y/n, I don’t know what I would do without you in my life. I loved you in the past, I love you in the present, and I will always love you in the future. Will you marry me?”

You couldn’t help but nod as the room filled with the sound of your sobs and your sniffles. Konoha hugged you tenderly and kissed you. “I love you” you replied.

a/n: hope u guys aren’t mad at me nfkshfk ily all thank you for always being patient AAAAAA posting updates for Ace of Cups soon :”>

*I have like other requests piled up in my ask box but i’ll try to get to you soon im sorry 😭

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satoriberry · 3 years

Note

heyy^^ could I ask for a romantic match up with a haikyuu boy? ://)

I'm a girl and use she/they pronouns (but I prefer they/them), I'm 18 and I'm demi- & pansexual.

I'm an entp/intp and I'd say I'm a open minded and kinda funny person. I tend to be extremely shy when I'm not comfortable with people but when I'm with people I trust I'm the most extrovert person in the room.

When people annoy me or hurt people I love I can get damn mad in seconds.

Others say I'm very loyal and a good listener. They also see me as responsible (and I dont understand why, because I act kinda childish sometimes)

If I'm interested in something I can lose myself in it really quickly.

I really like science (especially chemistry & astronomy) and video games and my hobbies are skying, skating, volleyball and cooking.

My favourite song changes from time to time but some of my all time favourites are video games (by the young professionals) and serotonin (by girl in red)

Thank you so much and have a nice day!

A mystery person looking for love chose me as their matchmaker! Let's see what they're getting...

↬ Berry's note: thank you for sending in a request lovely anon!! also dw, i got your second message so its all good ( ๑>ᴗ<๑ )

You've been destined to be with none other than charismatic Oikawa Tooru himself! Wanna learn more?

- First of all, you two make such a cute duo [jealous] </3

- BUT LET'S GET INTO IT! First of all, getting to know each other. You're shy with strangers, right? Oikawa's perfect for that! He's such a lively and extroverted boy, so he tends to start conversations with people (and keep then going).

- The way he first notices you, it could've been anything. Maybe he saw you sitting alone reading, maybe you were discussing practice with your volleyball teammates (if you're in the club) or maybe he just overheard you making a really funny joke with a friend.

- Whatever it was, it caught his interest so he approached you once before his volleyball practice started. You were caught off guard because 1) wait omg no he's talking to me and 2) omg it's oikawa? Not blushy kind of shy, you just weren't expecting his company.

- He looked so jolly (and for what?) while asking you questions to get to know you. Your name, class, extracurricular activities, mutual friends possibly? He rambled on and on to prolong his time with you that he didn't sense Iwaizumi walking up behind him.

- "Y'know that one old chemistry teacher? I had her this morning and sh- OUCH??"

- Yeah, Iwaizumi used Volleyball-to-the-head™, it was super effective. Needless to say, he had to leave but before leaving, he waved you goodbye with a huge grin.

- After this first meeting, you two started to interact more and more often. After getting to know you, he discovered that not only are you nice and really friendly, you're genuinely so funny and being around is never a bore.

- You two have the same childish humour, and sometimes it's like you two mentally communicate elaborate bullshit ideas every 2 seconds (please leave iwaizumi alone, he'll die if Oikawa and Oikawa's partner in crime start to mess around)

- He likes to take you out on nature walks or stargazing, and if he's feeling funky, he'll take you to an arcade. He'll try to impress you by attempting to win a 10k token plushie (he didn't succeed in the end, instead, you won a duck plushie and gave it to him).

- And it's not surprising that at this rate, he started to really like you <3

- And after a while, he confessed his feelings to you. He didn't leave out the parts on how seeing you walk through the school gate always made him feel giddy, how he would giggle when he reads your messages, how gazing at your face while you do your homework in his room always sent his heart into a frenzy. He really poured his heart out.

- And let's just say, you two hit it off >:]

- Now let's start with the adorable stuff <3

- Ok first of all, TREATS YOU LIKE A GODDESS AND WILL NEVER DISRESPECT YOU. SERIOUSLY!!! You mean so much to him so he wouldn't even imagine hurting you in anyway :(

- LOVES taking walks with you in parks and around ponds. Will hold your hand the entire time (kisses the back of your palm before doing it <3)

- PLANETARIUM DATES!!! If I'm not wrong, it's canon he likes aliens, and you like astronomy right? Perfect sense to buy two tickets and spend your day in a planetarium together. His eyes would be like saucers the entire time and everytime 5 minutes, he goes, "Oh my god Y/N-chan, look at these!!! :0"

- During school days, will frequently invite you over to his house to spend time together, play video games, watch silly videos, watch reality TV together or volleyball matches when he feels like it.

- Speaking of volleyball, he'll bring you with him to practice! Will wink at you continuously and shows off his skills (pls cheer for him). If he's up to it, he'll play a 1-1 with you in the local neighbourhood park on your way back home.

- THINKS YOU'RE SO COOL WHEN SKATING!!! YOU COULD BE FALLING OFF AND HE'LL GO, "Omg Y/N you're so awesome :D!". PLEASE TEACH HIM TOO!

- Even the basics are enough for him. Also if you hold his hands while guiding him, chances are he'll start to blush. You're just so impressive and the praise you're giving him is too much for his heart to handle <3

- Ok ok, we all know Oikawa has a problem with limiting himself and always overworks himself. He's aware of that, but he doesn't think anyone wants to hear him talk about it.

- Except, you're there for him. It takes him a while to open up but, after he does, he never goes one day without thanking you. For reassuring, for scolding him when he needs it, for caressing him whenever he gets injured. For being there for him :]

- In return, he'll shower you with so much affection and loving words. He'll always check up on you, whether or not something bad happens.

- Reminds you of things if you forget them! You lost your notebook? He'll help you rewrite your notes and lessons. You have an important assignment due tomorrow? He'll help you with it, even if it means half-assing it. He's always there to assist you and make your life easier, just like how you made him happier.

- In conclusion, Oikawa would fly to the moon and back just to see you happy <3.

Runner ups!

➵ Sugawara Koushi (was so close to choosing him)

➵ Kozume Kenma

➵ Kuroo Tetsurou

↬ Berry's after-writing note: *fucking dies* MY BAKER AND FLOWER LOVING S/O POSTS WERE SO LOVED??? HELP???? THANK YALL SO MUCH. also thank you so much for sending in your request anon!!! mwah mwah :>

#oikawa x reader #oikawa tooru #tooru oikawa #haikyuu!!#hq!!#haikyuu matchup #character matchup #berry.requests <3 #berry.matchmaker <3

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that-sarcastic-writer · 4 years

Text

Once upon a time in NYU- MGG AU

Fandom: MGG, Criminal Minds

Pairing: College!Matthew X College!Reader

Summary: you couldn't stand Matthew, and he couldn't stand you. But you couldn't say the same when you were in his bed

Warnings: alternative universe, enemies to lovers relationship, cursing duh, hair pulling, fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, bad writing basically

WC: 6.1k

A/N: so I saw I think it was @eideticmemory write an enemies to lovers college fic and like a light just went on in my head, and I really wanted to that because I've always wanted to, but also give it my own twist and touch of course, so I guess this my attempt at writing a multi-chapter Matthew fic. Will I succeed? Probably not. But it's a good excuse to write smut after a year so we'll see. ALSO HUGE TW I understand posting this now might be a bit of a bad timing. So if you think that reading this will trigger you in any way, just go ahead and skip this one. I dont want to trigger anyone in any way, I just want to entertain you guys and myself in the process so yeah, read at your own risk and please please stay safe. And this is going to be a bit long so strap in yall and enjoy the poorly written sin.

Andddd huge huge thanks to my friend Kara (idk if shes reading this but yeah) for helping me edit this, she helped me make this so much better for you guys and she literally so amazing for actually spending the time to help me. So yeah,

You know when something bad happens, you’re always told to see the bright side of things? That maybe that unfortunate event isn’t as bad as you feel it is? Yeah, well, that doesn’t always apply, and it certainly didn’t when I found out I was partnered with the one person I was hoping I wouldn’t get paired with for my end of the semester film project.

Seriously, out of the nearly hundred students that were enrolled in my film class, I had to get paired up with him, him out of all people, literally the one person I was praying wouldn't get paired up with. Not only because I was forced to work with someone, because honestly all I wanted was to work alone, I had to get paired with Matthew fucking Gubler.

You know when people say God has his favourites? Yeah, well I certainly wasn't one of them.

Now, I didn’t necessarily hate Matthew Gubler. I didn't hate him for no reason, I didn't just wake up one day and decided I was just going to hate Matthew. There was a time where I actually liked him, I liked him more than I'd like to admit, deep down I still did. And I knew he liked me too, he did then at least. And we were good together, it was fun, we had a fun first couple of dates. To this day, they were the nicest dates I ever had, because he knew just how to make them special. I mean, when a guy takes you to the Neue Galerie here in New York and have nice long walk through Central Park, a walk filled with laughter and bliss, it has to be special, and in a weird way, he was special too.

And as much as I wanted more than just two or three dates, I would've been perfectly fine if he had told me what he wanted from the start. If he had suddenly changed his mind about me, I would've accepted it, and I would've been able to live a happy life as his friend if that's what he wanted.

But he didn't, and instead I found out he had other interests. And I didn't hear it from him, I heard it from my friend. She didn't even need to tell me who it was, because the minute she told me where he took her, I knew. He took her to the same place he took me not even two weeks later and then acted like I was nothing the next time he saw me. And my god did that fucking hurt. It hurt me in a way I had never been hurt before, because I thought he was different, I was hoping he was. And convincing myself that I hated him was much easier than facing the fact that it hurt. And I never addressed it ever again, not that Matthew cared enough to actually talk about us, or, whatever we were. So instead we just made each other's existence miserable.

No, what I felt for Matthew wasn't hate, it was just the strong need to stay ten feet away from him so I wouldn't shove a five foot pole up his ass. That's how I felt about Matthew Gubler.

And now, here I was, aggressively shoving my laptop and notebook into my bag so I could leave the auditorium as quickly as possible, or at least quick enough to avoid Matthew, because knowing how he was, he would come straight to me to rub our partnership in my face. And I was right, because the minute we were dismissed, I spotted his lanky frame starting to come down from the top rows where he usually sat, and he was headed my way.

Screaming a big nope in my head, I strapped my bag over my shoulder and headed straight for the exit. I knew I couldn't avoid him forever, especially now but, I just needed a minute to mentally prepare myself to deal with him, a minute and probably a bottle of booze. But I didn't get either because the minute I was out those doors, I heard the unmistakable sound of his voice calling my name.

Great.

"Y/N! Y/N wait!" I heard Matthew call out, followed my rushed footsteps coming from behind me.

"Hey, partner, I'm glad I caught you before you left. You weren't trying to run away from me were you?" He teased, throwing one of his particularly long arms over my shoulder.

If I had rolled my eyes any harder they probably would've gotten stuck there. I groaned, grabbing a hold of his arm and unwrapping it not so subtly before dropping it beside him, "first of all, I'd really appreciate it if you didn't touch me, and second of all, just please go away, Matthew. I have a class I have to get to." I muttered, walking slightly faster and keeping my gaze forward, refusing to even look at him.

If there was something I've learned about Matthew in the two long years I've known him is that he usually goes away on his own if I don't give him the attention he wanted. I was hoping this was one of those times, because I was not in the mood to deal with him right now.

But alas, he didn't, he walked faster, staying beside me the whole time. "But I wasn't even doing anything. I was just saying hi." He defended, and I could just hear the smile on his face even when I wasn't even looking at him.

I rolled my eyes harder, letting out a small breath through my lips, "what do you want Matthew?"

"When can we meet up? I already have an idea for our project and I think you're going to love it."

I chuckled sarcastically, finding his words actually hilarious, "If you came up with it I seriously doubt it." I sighed heavily, digging my teeth into my bottom lip before speaking, "tonight after I finish my shift, I guess. The quicker we can start, the quicker we can get it over with, soo..."

"Great. It's a date then, see you tonight, sweetheart." He hummed, ghosting his lips over my ear, his lips smacking loudly as he pretended to kiss it before he quickly took off in the other direction before I could even say anything.

This fucking guy.

~~~~~~~~~~

"I seriously do not understand how you fucking dated this guy, he's so obnoxious and annoying, how could anyone want to date someone like that." I complained to my friend and roommate Liz. I met her for a quick lunch break before my afternoon class and I just had to let her know how unhappy I was about my partnership with Matthew. She was amused to say the least.

"You make it sound like we dated for years, we dated for a few months, but he's not even that bad." she argued.

I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest and leaned back into my seat with an unamused expression, just waiting for Liz to bury herself further up Matthew's ass. I always had the feeling she still had feelings for him, as much as she insisted it was just a meaningless relationship. And as much as they were just friends now, I just knew she wanted more with him. But it wasn't really my place to question that, not that it mattered to me anyway.

"He's a pretty cool and fun guy to be around, you just never gave him a chance. You've hated him ever since you met him for absolutely no reason, you never gave yourself the chance to get to know him better." Liz insisted, she always did. She always insisted Matthew was such a great guy I never gave the change to get to know.

I had let out a heavy sigh in annoyance of her defense of Matthew before responding, "yeah well, it doesn't really matter since I'm being forced to anyway. And he's coming over tonight to start our project. Can't fucking wait."

I could've sworn I saw Liz's expression change into a mixture of surprise and something I could've easily confused with jealousy. She pursed her lips together and her eyes darted everywhere, like she was avoiding making any kind of eye contact with me.

But, it couldn't be jealousy? What even is there to be jealous of? Her and the whole world knew how I felt about Matthew, her out of all people knew it better than anyone.

"Oh, he is? Well, I'm not really going to be home tonight, I would've given you company so it wouldn't be so awkward with him." She frowned, she sounded disappointed, angry even. She looked uncomfortable, like she was deeply bothered by something, by something I said.

It was weird, I wasn't exactly sure what to say, I wasn't really sure why my news seemed to bother her as much as it did. It's not like I was going to sleep with Matthew while she was away or something. It didn't really matter though, I didn't have time to answer. Thank God.

"I'm sorry Liz but I have to go, I have class in like ten minutes." I excused myself, eating whatever was left on my plate in a matter of seconds before I stood up from my seat and gathered my belongings, "I'll see you later and wish me luck." I said quickly before taking off, not giving her the chance to respond.

~~~~~~~~~~

Usually, I pray for shifts to be over as soon as possible, for it to be slow so I can go home early. Today though, today I prayed for just the opposite. I was hoping the end of my shift wouldn't come, and when it did, that it would be too late and I would be able to cancel my meet up with Matthew.

But like I said, I wasn't one of God's favourites. And today out of all days, it was the slowest it has ever been and my shift ended rather quickly, quicker than I had hoped.

Groaning loudly at the evening that awaited me, I walked down the long halls of my floor, standing outside of my dorm room, dreading my evening already.

Figuring I should just get it over with, I went to get the key on the lock of my door, but noticed it was already unlocked. Liz probably forgot to lock the door, again. I rolled my eyes, shaking my head at my stupid roommate before turning the knob, opening the door. And my jaw dropped the minute I stepped into the room, not believing what my eyes saw.

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

"Matthew, what the fuck are you doing in my dorm and in my bed!? How did you even get in here?" I nearly screamed at the tall brunette that was carelessly laying on my bed with what I figured was one of my books in his hand.

Matthew turned his head towards me, a carefree and calm look plastered all over his face before his eyes went back to the pages in front of him., "oh, well, Liz let me in before she went to work. I hope you don't mind." He responded nonchalantly, continuing to flick through the pages of the book he had in his hand.

I stared at him with absolute disbelief and a loud scoff left my lips as I slightly pitched the bridge of my nose, trying not to throw the nearest object at his face, "yes, I do mind, in fact. You can't just come into somebody's dorm, lie on their bed and go through their stuff. Seriously dude, what is wrong with you?"

I just couldn't believe this guy. He just knew how to get on my nerves without even doing anything.

Matthew, of course, couldn't have cared any less about whatever I was saying. And it wasn't that he wasn't listening, because he was, he had that stupid smile on his face that proved he was in fact listening to every word I was saying. He just didn't care, or he did, but he just liked getting on my nerves. He loved pushing every single one of my buttons until I snapped. And I had no idea why. I had no idea why he liked annoying me so much.

I exhaled heavily through my nose, closing my eyes slightly as I ran a hand through my hair exasperatedly, "I just can't fucking deal with you. I can't." I huffed, dropping my bag from my shoulder and walked to the opposite side of my room, facing away from him, not even wanting to look at his face.

"Tell me something, sweetheart," Matthew spoke, curiosity and a slight bit of amusement lingering on his words.

"What."

"Why do you hate me so much? You've hated me ever since I dated Liz back in our first year of college and I never truly understood why," he questioned with genuine curiosity, but there was also a certain playfulness in his voice. I opened my mouth to answer, still not facing him, and I was so ready to tell him off, god knows I've been wanting to but he cut me off. "Is it because I never slept with you?"

My eyes instantly widened at his words, a clearly offended scoff leaving my lips as I turned around to face him, "what? No, of course not, I—" my words got caught in my throat when I saw his tall frame towering over me, my eyes getting stuck on his chest before they traveled up to his face, and he was close. Extremely close. I swallowed thickly, feeling slightly cornered by his significantly taller frame so I stepped back, trying to create some kind of distance between us, but he simply followed me. "I, uhm, that's not why I don't like you, Matthew. I don't like you because you're an insensitive asshole and—"

"Oh, I know why you hate me," he cut me off again, slowly running his tongue to wet his perfectly pink lips. "You hate me because I dated Liz and not you."

His proclamation made my eyes grow even wider and my mouth hung open as I stammered for words. I wanted to disagree, I truly wanted to tell him that he was wrong. But honestly, he wasn't altogether wrong. I couldn't say some of my resentment didn't come from a deep rooted feeling of rejection. Because while most of that resentment came from that place of genuine hurt, my resentment was fueled by frustration and a shameless sense of envy.

But it was just easier to convince myself that I hated him than to admit that I still liked him and that it hurt me that he chose my friend over me.

But of course, I would never admit to that, especially not to him.

Avoiding eye contact, I looked down and shook my head, running my tongue to wet my suddenly dry lips, "of-of course not. Why—why would I care about your dating life? You can fuck whoever you want, I don't care." I wish I sounded more confident when I said that. But my stuttering words and my unsteady legs gave him exactly what he wanted.

And the bastard actually chuckled. He fucking chuckled.

"But you do, you do care. You care because you haven't stopped thinking about us and me since our first year." He grinned, digging his teeth into his perfect lips as he brought a hand to cup my face, lifting it so I had no other choice but to look at him.

And I was fucking gone.

It was like, all of that anger, frustration and hatred just vanished and instead turned into longing want. Want for him to just take me and do whatever he pleases with me. I was practically nothing in his hands, and I was nothing waiting for him to make me something. Waiting for him to make me his.

And that absolutely delighted the bastard. He found amusement in having the power I never allowed him to have. But right now, I just couldn't fight it.

I always knew that if I ever found myself alone and in this situation with Matthew Gubler, I would lose, no matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise.

And he knew that too.

"That's it, isn't? You want me to fuck you like I fucked your friend." He smirked, almost like he was proud to say it. And he stared, his usually soft amber eyes now brown and darkened with want.

Who the fuck was this guy and where did Matthew go? Matthew Gubler was the most awkward and disgraceful guy when it came to women. The poor guy couldn't even flirt his way out of a wet paper bag. And yet, somehow, here he was, with this new found confidence and the ability to turn me into a shaking and stuttering mess. Who fucking knew.

Once again, I stammered for words, I truly wanted to tell him otherwise. I wanted to scream in his face and push him away, but I couldn't. Not that I wanted to.

He took my lack of response as the answer he was looking for and brought his other hand to my waist, backing me up against the nearest wall, caging me between the hard surface behind me and his body, which right now, seemed so much bigger than mine.

My breathing instantly skyrocketed as I felt the same hand that was on my waist sneak its way past the ends of my dress and up my bare thighs, ones that shook like an earthquake as the pads of his fingers slowly rubbed the tense skin. Like he was testing the waters. Testing how well my body reacted to his touch.

And it wasn't subtle. At all.

"W-what—what are you doing?" I almost squealed, my voice practically betraying me.

"Oh? Well, I'm just giving you what you wanted. I'm giving you what you've been wanting for years." He stated so casually, like he had no idea what he was doing to me. And just as casually, he slowly ran a finger over the thin cotton fabric of my underwear, touching me, but definitely not in the way I needed to be touched.

I wished my body didn't betray me like it did though. I couldn't even hold back the breathy moan that escaped my lips when his fingers made contact with the thin material. But Matthew certainly loved the response I gave him.

"Because this is what you've been wanting, isn't it? You've been thinking about how my fingers would feel buried inside your little cunt. Or how good you would feel around my cock." He taunted, it was almost cynical just how easily those filthy words rolled off his usually reserved tongue. "I'm not gonna lie, I've thought about it too, you have no idea how many times I've thought about having your filthy mouth wrapped around me. Or how pretty you would look begging me for more."

I opened my mouth to speak but my words instantly got caught in my throat when the sneaky bastard pulled the fabric to the side and dipped his fingers into the soaking mess that was my core.

And if there were any rational thoughts still hanging in my head, all of those just went straight out the window when another moan erupted from my throat and my head fell back into the wall behind me.

"See just how much easier things are when you just shut the fuck up and stop fighting so much?" He almost whispered, his lips ghosting over the skin on my neck as a lithe finger gathered my wetness and spread it over my clit.

Despite being a complete whimpering mess at that point, I managed to spit out a surprisingly harsh, "fuck you."

It was a pretty convincing retort. One that didn't exactly have the effect I hoped for though.

I could feel him smirk into my neck as his lips left wet and sloppy kisses into the skin before he pulled back, just so he could see the look of utter want and frustration on my face.

"Hm, sorry sweetheart, I can't do that. I'm too busy trying to fuck you instead."

I swear to god, he was the biggest asshole I have ever met in my entire fucking life. But he was an asshole who immediately slipped two of his sinfully long fingers into my dripping core. I instantly choked on my own breath as he began working his fingers around the muscles, stroking the digits inside me at an agonizingly slow pace.

"Because that's what you want don't you sweetheart? You want to me to fuck you into that mattress until you can't keep your eyes open?" He continued, his filthy words making me pant like I ran for fucking miles. "I do too, trust me I do. And I will, I promise. But I want to make up for all of the lost time. Don't you?"

I wasn't even paying attention to whatever filthy proclamations were coming out of Matthew's mouth, with my eyes nearly closed, my mouth slightly open and my mind only focusing on his fingers working diligently inside me, how could I?

But Matthew was expecting an answer this time. Because I could feel his darkened eyes glare into my face and his fingers immediately stilled inside me. Earning a loud whine from me.

"I asked you a question, answer me."

It took me a minute to remember his question before I quickly nodded, "yes! Yes! Is that what you wanted to hear?" I nearly screamed at his face, my hands coming to clutch his shirt, needing something to relieve some tension.

"I want to hear you say it. Say it, tell me you want me." He demanded, his eyes locking with mine as he waited for what he wanted to hear.

He wanted me to beg, he wanted me to give up that control I never allowed him to have. And was I going to?

Absolutely.

I needed to.

"I want you, Matthew, I want you to take me and fuck me into that mattress until I can't walk straight. Please."

I guess that was the answer Matthew had been looking for because his fingers immediately began to work diligently inside me again, stroking the digits until he had me whimpering and begging for release.

It wasn't long before my head started to spin and stars began to blur my vision. Words were no longer an option at that point, nothing would come out, not even Matthew's name. All I could manage to let out were pathetic, strangled moans. But he could tell I was close, or I figured that much because his fingers only worked faster around my tightening walls, determined to finish me.

"C'mon sweetheart, come for me." he encouraged through gritted teeth as his fingers were anything but still inside me and his palm applied a crushing pressure into my front. And even when my eyes were half closed and my mind had turned into dust, I could see the look of utter determination on his face, his eyebrows were furrowed as his teeth dug into his perfectly plump lips. It was like his only focus was on driving me over the edge. And he succeeded.

The second his fingers curled, I was fucking gone. My orgasm hit me like a tidal wave. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as I cried out his name like a praise, my body nearly spasming against the wall. But his fingers didn't stop until my whole body shook to the point where my legs no longer supported my weight and I practically slid into the wall as I tried to catch my breath.

It was almost dizzying just how quickly Matthew withdrew his fingers from me and hoisted me up on his slim torso. He wasted absolutely no time in striding over to my bed across the room. My whole body collided with my bed so quickly and forcefully it knocked the air out of my chest.

Matthew was practically ripping away his clothes before I could even sit up or catch my breath. Like he had this urgency to do what I've been avoiding for the past two years. Like he needed to do it, right now, like something would happen before he got the chance to.

"Matthew—"

"Shut up, I've heard enough shit from you for the past two years, and I'm fucking tired of it." He almost growled, his usually soft voice coming out so low and dark it actually stroked fear in my heart. It was scary just how quickly his demeanor changed.

Matthew didn't really waste much time in discarding his clothes, he was down to only his boxers and was on top of me before I could even blink. He brought a hand to my chest and he pushed me down until my back was flat on the bed, but his hand stayed there, pinning me there as he hovered over me, trapping my significantly smaller body under his own.

He wasted no time in grabbing a hold of my dress and pulling it over my head. And I could've sworn I saw pure awe and infatuation flash through his eyes as they shamelessly eyed over my newly exposed skin. Come to think of it though, this was the first time I was this naked in front of him, and even then, I wasn't fully naked. Not yet anyway.

After a good minute, his eyes flickered back up to meet with mine, his previous look of awe quickly replaced by this feral look of want and pure desire. And I couldn't say it didn't excite me to see it.

He brought a hand to my face, running his smooth fingers over my face with a surprising amount of delicacy before he deep rooted them into my hair and slightly tilted my head back before he brought his face into mine, our lips crashing into a deep fervent kiss. I didn't realize we have never actually kissed. No wonder there was so much desperation and hunger within that kiss. We've been wanting this ever since we met, and ironically, I wanted it more.

His mouth was harsh and fervent against mine, his tongue wasting no time before it quickly slipped between my lips without much of a warning. His tongue explored every inch of my mouth and took as much control as he wanted to as he brought one of his hands to discard my brassiere, he struggled a bit at first but he managed to unhook it and discarded the flimsy material along with the rest of forgotten clothes. He pulled back to capture the image of my newly exposed skin. And he wasn't subtle, at all.

I almost felt intimidated under his deep and penetrating gaze as he shamelessly ogled my exposed body. I was completely exposed to him, completely vulnerable and right now, he could do whatever the fuck he wanted with me. And that scared me, it scared me just how quickly he took control over me after years of fighting against it.

With a hard swallow and a bob of his Adam's apple, Matthew slowly licked his lips, scraping his teeth against his slightly swollen bottom lip in a way that almost made me roll my eyes back into my head. But I didn't, instead I just locked eyes with him as he brought his face down and wrapped his lips around one of my breasts and his tongue swirled around the sensitive bud almost expertly, using one of his hands to toy with the other.

"O-oh fuck." I couldn't help but helplessly moan into the air as my hands found their way into his mop of brown curls. This reaction certainly delighted the bastard above me because I could feel his eyes burning into my face and his lips curving into a smirk around me before he slowly pulled back, latching on to my nipple as he pulled off it.

"You have a very filthy mouth, jeez." He tisked, slightly shaking his head disaprovingly but still had that fucking smirk of his.

Clearly, I wasn't amused, in the slightest, so his stupid comment earned him a nice and concise, "fuck you."

But then again, it didn't have the effect I hoped for.

"Mhm, yeah, you're about to." He retorted one last time before bringing his face back up to mine, capturing me in a heated and messy kiss that only worked as distraction from the journey Matthew's hands took down south. I was only brought back to reality when I felt my underwear being ripped away and the cool air hitting me. And he was quick to pull down his own boxers and allowed his length to spring free. And I couldn't even play off the fact that I had to stare, my mouth slightly hanging open at the sight of him.

"You're so cute when you stare." He taunted, his words being fairly tame in contrast to his very dark and not innocent tone. The sound of his voice made me flicker my eyes to meet his face. Big mistake, because the borderline devious smirk on his face didn't help, at all. And it certainly didn't help when he positioned himself between my legs, rubbing himself on my already dripping heat.

"You do have condoms here, right?" He asked, but I wasn't paying attention, with him rubbing himself on my slick, I couldn't really pay much attention to anything. "I could just fuck you bareback, I'm clean, so I don't care. But it's up to you." He spoke again, slightly teasing my entrance with the tip of his length, hoping to actually get my attention, and I actually listened this time.

Biting my lip, I mentally cursed at my lack of sexual activity because it just so happened that I had no condoms. Matthew gave me an expectant look, not to pressure me, but just waiting impatiently. I knew if I told him to stop he would without a second thought, but he would just leave. I wasn't going to make that mistake twice.

"I'm clean too, just," I chewed on my bottom lip, already shuddering with anticipation as I hooked my legs around his slim torso, pulling him closer, "just take me, please just fucking take me already."

I didn't have to say it twice.

Without a second thought, he propped himself up on his arms and pressed his face against mine as he slammed into me in one swift motion. A strangled moan erupted from my throat as he buried himself to the hilt, stretching me open at once. And fuck, the feeling of him inside me was intoxicating, addicting even, I don't think I've ever felt like this before.

This was so fucking wrong. So wrong, so wrong to be fucking the guy my friend dated, so wrong to be fucking the guy I swore to everyone I hated. It was just wrong. So why the hell did it feel so right? It was so perfectly right the way our bodies felt together, like they simply belonged there, buried deeply within one another. I never wanted to stop feeling like this.

It was almost dizzying just how good he felt. And with the quick and fervent pace he set for himself right from the start, I knew I probably wouldn't last long. With my eyes rolled into my head, my open mouth and my body sprawled out on the bed as I tried to find something to hold on to, he probably had one hell of a view. And he enjoyed it too, because his thrusts only became harsher.

"Fuck, sweetheart, you're so fucking beautiful," he cursed through gritted teeth, his hands holding my hips down with a vice like grip, making sure I couldn't move. And it wasn't for lack of trying. My body shook and shuddered like a fucking earthquake around him but he simply held me down as he continued.

"You feel so good too. I can't believe you made me wait two fucking years for this. Fuck." He nearly shouted, slamming into me with an insane amount of force and clenched his eyes shut, almost as if the thought made him angry, "two fucking years to take what was mine."

His. He called me his.

Fuck, I wish those filthy words didn't have such a strong effect on me, but boy did they make a number on me. I couldn't even hold back the guttural cry that erupted from my chest as I nodded feverishly, not really realizing what I was nodding to.

"Yes! Fuck yes, Matthew, I'm yours!" I almost screamed, saying whatever incoherent thoughts flashed through my mind, letting the whole floor know just how much fun I was having and with whom. And with my mind and thoughts being too clouded by the feeling of him, I didn't even think about what those words entailed.

But it didn't matter because they served their purpose regardless. I wasn't expecting just how much the words actually affected him, because his hips began to falter, his thrusts becoming longer but impossibly deeper. And I could see how concentrated he was, with sweat forming on his forehead, his teeth digging into his bottom lip and his breath was hard and short, like this was a task he was determined to finish. He was determined to ruin me.

Letting out a guttural and nearly animalistic groan, Matthew grabbed a hold of my hips and raised them so that each thrust would make him bottom out inside of me, knowing just how close we both were to our release. "Yeah, that's right, sweetheart, let the whole floor know who's making you feel this good," he growled as he gave one last final but brutal thrust, digging his fingers into my hips so tight I just knew I would have bruises tomorrow as he held me down on him, "let the whole floor know you're mine."

And just like that, my orgasm crashed into me, Matthew's harsh words of ownership sending me into a euphoric state of pleasure, my lips chanting his name like a mantra and my walls tightening around him as he came deeply into me, my own name rolling off his tongue in a quiet praise. And the utter and absolute look of ecstasy on his face made up for the bruises I would have to hide for the next few days and for the two years we've made each other's life a living hell. Because right now, seeing that look of being completely fucked, I just wanted nothing more than to just stay like this.

The second we were no longer blinded by our highs, he fell forward, nearly crushing me under his weight as he struggled to get himself up. Yeah he looked fucked alright. Despite knowing damn well he could've easily rolled off me, he didn't, he simply rested his head on my chest and closed his eyes like he was just going to sleep there. A small smile made its way to my lips at the sight of his tousled brown curls on my chest, ignoring all logic, I ran my fingers through the messy locks, and they were in fact as soft as they always looked.

Realizing just how bad this was for me, and just how vulnerable I actually looked, I smacked his forehead, successfully earning a glare from him once he lifted his head, looking dead at me with his now soft amber eyes.

"You're crushing me, you ass, get off." I breathed out and rolled my eyes, being too exhausted to try and get him off myself. And knowing just how easily he corrupted me, I didn't need another thing to make this harder.

"Okay, okay, jeez." Matthew rolled his eyes, letting his head back into my chest exhaustively and groaned tiredly into my chest before he gathered just enough strength to roll off me and collapsed beside me, his reddened and sweaty chest still rising and falling unevenly as he was still trying to steady his breathing. And I was trying, too. And we just stared, we stared at each other, saying nothing. There was nothing to be said. It was better that way.

After a long long while of silently staring at each other, he brought a hand to my face and rested it there, his thumb mindlessly rubbing over the warm skin of my cheek and he smiled, he simply smiled. And it felt good, it felt comforting, sweet even, it was a funny contrast after what he just did to me.

"So.. About our project.."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag list:

Matthew Gray Gubler

All- @aberrant-annie @marauder-exe @vquezada84 @boiled-onionrings @writeronkeyboard @l0ve-0f-my-life @mariaramz @soederberg

OUaT in NYU-

So I'm starting a tag list for this fic because it will be a mini series so let me know if you'd like to be added to the once upon in NYU tag list

#criminal minds #mgg #spencer reid #mgg x reader #mgg smut #mgg fanfiction #matthew gray gubler #matthew gray gubler x reader #Matthew Gray Gubler smut #x reader

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shyrose57 · 3 years

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Part 2 with da angst

2: Young Ranbob did not understand at all what was going on, infact he refused to believe he ever had anything to do with the sabotages, it was only when Dream took over completely and gave Ranbob enough of his mind to know what he was doing, did he finally accept it. He tried and tried to break Dreams control and get control of his body back, but nothing he did ever really worked, and the more he tried Dream eventually began to punish him, forcing him to stop. He felt aboustely awful, like a failure, a murder, and just a shitty person during all of this. His journal shows basically all of his mental decline, it went from normal, him recording special things during the day, to semi-normal, him expression concern and fear over the sabotages and killings (with some out of place words or sentences here and there appearing half way through, showing Dreams presence), to recordings from someone with obvious mental distress (misspelled words, extreme fear, showing fear of himself, hasty writings and drawings, very obviously out of place sentences (their neater than the rest and written differently, written by Dream), and meaningless words and sentences, obviously trying to say something but not knowing how too), all they way to flipping entries of when Ranbob is in control (sadness, despair, hasitly done, regret, and just heavy sentences) to when Dream is in control (Neat writing, stating "facts", showing a level of glee). Ranbob does still have it, he actually still uses it to record what happens in the groups and how far he's come. To the Gladiators its more of a "Hey I found this thing, lets read this thing." "No let's not read the thing." "Im going to ignore you and read it anyway.". The pictures are from the current ruined state of the City of Mizu, and pictures showing Ranbob at the fishermens house, struggling to walk and even eat on his own, though a few are from before Dream ever got a hold of Ranbob.

3: The way you just said "Causally drops some trauma on them, huh?" And "Traumatized gremlins" made me laugh so much. Its so accurate and made me just think of the brothers vibing toghere before I just pop in and drop tons of trauma on them before dipping. "Ah, damn, the opponent stared me in my chest." "WHY ARE YOU SO CALM ABOUT THIS!? YOUR BLEEDING OUT!" "Oh im used to this. Trust me I'll survive...probably." "RAN I SWEAR!". And "Ranbob when did you last eat?" "Uhhh, 2 days ago I think." "..." "D-did I eat too soon? I dont have to eat for another day or two max-" "Ranbob shut up and eat." "B-but-" "If you dont eat I'll tell Benjamin." "OK ok I'll eat." Ran thinks its normal to get stabbed often, while Ranbob thinks its normal to only eat every 2 or 3 days, and to not sleep for a long time. There is one particular hunter that's been hunting him the longest, they go by Raq and are the most determined to get Ran, though they don't plan on killing him, but rather kidnapping him and exploting him for pearls. It was a bit hard at first, Ran kept having to leave to wander around the City for a bit, though he eventually successfully got accustomed to staying in one place, though he does sometimes wish he could travel again.

4: A bit of everything, him getting violent and trying to run at first. But after that it fades more into what resembles a depressive state, with him refusing to move and crying while being lost in his head. He requires space to move around but be monitored in the first state, while for the second he needs constant comfort and physical contact. The aftermath was the fishermen and Jackie staying close to Ranbob for the next 2 days, while Grievous and Watson try to find Ran after he stormed off in anger and disbelief. Ran does know what a relapse means, but during the time he believes Ranbobs relapse might be something else (like his facade faulting maybe).

5: Not long at all, while Ran is carrying Jackie and Cletus makes fun of them as Ranbob is following him, Jackie quickly points out how Ranbob is like a lost puppy, and the same thing is basically happening to the two of them, but showed different ways. (The brothers making sure their family is safe by sticking close to them).

6: By the time they travel to Subbin, Ranbob has gained like 80 pounds and is a way more healthy weight and looks much more healthier than when the fishermen first found him.

7: Their usually either getting materials, looking around the area/exploring, being taught things by someone, or sleeping. Charles was the one who revived the nickname! He called him that when trying different tactics to calm him down from a nightmare, Ranbob immediately froze and after a while started to cry, Charles panicked but Ranbob quickly comforted him, saying he just hasn't heard Bobby used in such a long time and brings back both incredibly happy and incredibly sad memories. And with permission, Charles starts using it more. Ran also freezes when hearing it, immediately going ridged and almost ripping a map he has in his hands, when asked by Grievous what was wrong, he just growled out nothing and moved on. Though he does mull over it later, conflicting emotions running all over him.

8: Helping separate Ran and Ranbob was already big for the gladiators. As most people would just watch with glee. Then when they get time to talk and make the connection between Ran and Ranbob, they decide to make a exception and willingly put in effort to bond with the other group. Also them just naturally connecting made the bonding and trust easy between the groups.

9: They do both! They keep some books, pictures, and other stuff, but sell others as relics. Ranbob mostly disapproves of them selling the items, but also knows it'll probably be best to sell them, and have them either spread the story of Mizu as a warning, or have the story of Mizu destroyed by assumptions and twisting of the story.

10: I'm thinking maybe a Wilbur decendent is inhabiting a certain town, and when the groups stop in for a break, Wilbur decendant houses them and listens to their story, and tries to help?

11: They mostly just find them, they either find them in book stores or ruined towns and cities (maybe I can put The Masquerade tale in here somewhere), a wide range of people, from scholars to plain history nerds, to books from during the time of the SMP itself to books written by seemingly no one. Ranbob finds some himself, mostly when exploring with the group. I think I misworded this! Dream is the one who compared Ranbobs journal to Ranboos memory book! Ranbob knows of Ranboos memory book but he himself doesn't see the connection. Ran feels all of the above. He is extremely ashamed and disappointed in himself for hurting his brother, he hugs him tightly and apologizes non-stop, promising to make it all up to him, and while he asks for forgiveness he also says he doesnt expect for his brother to forgive him. Once he finally sees Dream for real though he's the first one to blindly attack and try to kill em. Though he doesnt succeed.

12: No one expect the brothers where outside in the rain when they fought. So no one knew of what was happening. Its only when Ran finally joined them, but alone, did they get scared and alarmed. And when Ran admits they got into a fight and Ranbob ran off, the fishermen immediately start yelling at Ran and run off to find Ranbob, screaming his name into the deafening thunder. Grievous follows them but Watson and Jackie hang back a bit, Jackie just looks at Ran with a heartbroken expression, tears in his eyes, and asks, with his voice shaking and laced with sadness, "Why can't you at least try to accept him, you dont have to like or forgive him, but why can't you just let him heal?" "Jackie..you dont know what's he done-" "I do know! And I'm willing to help him change and recover! You can't and your his brother! What kind of family member are you?" Ran tries to respond but Jackie just chokes and shakes his head at him, running off to follow the others. Watson then speaks up, simply saying "Mate, your doing more than hurting Ranbob at this point." Before running off to follow and join the others. Ran feels horrible, even before being confronted he so badly wanted to chase after Ranbob, but was to scared too and he constantly was trying to reassure himself that he did the right thing, but no matter what, he couldn't convince himself that was the truth. And after the confrontation, Ran is taking what was said to heart and also considering running away, leaving the group behind and sparing them of all the pain he believes he causes, believing that he's just as bad a family member as Ranbob was. But he doesnt, because he feels like he absolutely needs to talk to his brother and everyone else.

2: Oh god. Poor Ranbob. He really went through it. It does make me wonder, did anyone notice something was up? His mentor? Parents? Friends? Speaking off, what was his relationship with them all? From what I know, he seemed to be under a lot of pressure, so how did that effect things, and how did Dream’s presence change that? And uh, gladiators reactions to reading the diary? Also, did they get caught reading it, or? And how did everyone in general react to the pictures? The fishermen may have taken the latter, but how did they feel about seeing Ranbob before Dream came into the picture?

3: I tell it like it is, glad to hear it’s made you laugh though. And uh, oh boy. On one hand, I definitely shouldn’t laugh at stabbing and possible starvation. One the other. Ran’s reaction. Ranbob being threatened with Benjamin. Is he often threatened with Benjamin? What exactly happens if Benjamin is told? Will Raq be causing future problems? Is Ran happy to be on the road again?

4: That sucks. Did the gladiators witness it first hand, or did the fishermen kind of realize what was happening and split off for a bit? Reactions to either seeing or hearing this happen?

5: Ranbob’s reaction to this? Heck, all of the fishermen’s reactions?

6: As he should. If he ever starts looking even slightly thin again, Benjamin needs to jump into immediate action! Also, give him a blanket and warm drink, please? Please, he needs it, they all do.

7: So not too bad, that’s good. Charles was the one, huh? Interesting. Does Ranbob like having it back? And conflicting emotions, hmm? What would those emotions be? Does anyone ever notice the nickname makes him mad?

8: So the gladiators consider that their big approval? Why’s that? Like obviously, they helped break it up, but was it something particular? Did they get between the two? Jump into the arena? What?

9: A warning of Mizu...there’s something awfully tragic about that.

10: Sounds interesting! In what way would they be able to help?

11: Scattered about, hm? So Ranbob knows about Ranboo’s memory book? Did Dream tell him, or did Mizu have a copy, or? And yay, Ranbob finally gets a hug! Most wonderful! Sad Ran doesn’t succeed in murder, but meh. Always next time, I suppose.

12: You...you were really going for my heart when you wrote this, weren’t you? Um, first of all, ouch. Second of all, also ouch. That’s all I’ve got for you right now. Just, ouch, Anon. Ouch.

#dream smp #dream smp au #Brothers AU #tales from the smp #ranbob

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calangkoh · 3 years

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All this discussion of CoS had me rewatching it and wow, something is... off about Alphonse? Like the memories, etc Did Ed's resurrection of his brother truly succeed or... is Al just an advanced homunculus? It's making me think of the buildup to Alphonse wondering if he really is Ed's brother

[this became one of my more rambly answers. i apologize for the essay. im also writing this with a LOT of background noise so it might be a little all over the place]

you are not alone in this feeling because al is DEFINITELY “off” in CoS. i dont KNOW if its intentional the way he feels sorta....unhinged? but he does to me, and im relieved to know others feel the same. there’s actually a theory about al not being al, which was originally by @fizzybubblespop [x], and i expanded on it in a different direction here [x] (this was written years ago so it might be a little cringe in quality lol). both are takes on the idea that al was never really al to begin with. sad. i dont believe them, tbh. i dont think canon has the intention to ever imply al isnt really al. but its still an intriguing theory that makes you question life and existence. the fun stuff.

but yeah, i think ed really did manage to do the first ever successful human transmutation, because in 03 (unlike mangahood) its implied to be somewhat possible. that it can be done, except no one can do it right due to problems with the alchemist themselves. i interpret that ed created al’s body (because while they do question “maybe als body is still in the gate” it doesnt make sense for him not to have aged, since wrath was able to age somehow--idek how that works either tbh), and was able to pull al’s soul from the gate like al was able to do with ed, because they had JUST died.

so i think a successful human transmutation, a true resurrection where the person is definitely the same soul and not a copy, requires: knowledge of how to create a body with alchemy, a proper transaction (which im not sure how that works either, because alchemists dont choose what they sacrifice, and when ed DOES choose, the gate still takes something different. and the gate in 03 isnt operated by a conscious entity like Truth--either way, al’s transaction was the philosophers stone, which included his own soul. ed’s was his arm and leg, undoing al’s sacrifice, and also him ending up in london. because a life doesnt equal a life. ed had to give up something more.), and the soul has to be “within reach,” as in, it has to have just died and be waiting at the gate. sidenote that in al’s case, he had ed’s fresh body right there with him (ew thats a creepy sentence)

and since most alchemists lose the person, and then spend tons of time developing the theory before doing the transmutation, it has never been done.

just to expand, and the following is just me brainstorming...i think ed’s sacrifice makes sense and did work because of his experiences up to that point. yknow how in mangahood, you could say “wow but couldnt ed have sacrificed his gate way earlier?” but it doesnt really work because the lessons he learned to arrive at the conclusion “hey i could sacrifice my alchemy” were necessary to the sacrifice? like, the sacrifice wouldnt have worked or made sense if he just...thought of it with no work. if he just one day thought “hey i have an idea ill sacrifice my gate of truth” it wouldn’t have worked. at least imo. because the point of his sacrifice was the journey he had to finally look Truth in the eye and say “ive been through everything ive been through and i know i dont need it.”

similarly, ed’s sacrifice at the end of 03 only works because of his experiences. all the adventure and excitement as well as the pain and hardships had meaning. the lessons and the bonding with al and the way everything shaped who he is. it had meaning to him. maybe by ending up on the other side of the gate, he’s essentially sacrificing the meaning to his suffering, and since he has been through so much, he’s sacrificing the meaning of most of his life, and the meaning of your life is what would be worth more than the life itself (because a life doesnt equal a life). so, if ed had made the sacrifice earlier, to just give up his whole mind, body, and soul, it wouldnt have worked. the gate wouldve just taken him and he woulda gotten nothing from it.

both series have the optimistic nihilism approach (though 03 leans more into addressing the nihilism, while fmab kinda contradicts it to lean into the optimism), where yes we’re all just tiny specks and are insignificant in the long run and cant fight the flow of life, but that just gives us more power to give ourselves meaning. 03 ed gave up that power by ending up on the other side of the gate, and he can understand the war veteran more than ever who says not all losses and gains are material or visible. they cant be adequately quantified or explained by logic or rules. we assign the meaning. and maybe the gate takes that into account, and it knew ed assigned the most meaning to his shared experiences (cough shared trauma cough) with al. hence, hohenheims speech explaining what ed had to have given up to be worth more than his life to bring al back.

#ask #meta

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scatterpatter · 4 years

Text

Some expanded thoughts on FF7R under the cut [SPOILERS]

So! Overall I freaking LOVED the remake and I can’t wait to see the rest! Midgar feels so alive and expanded, you really feel attached to everyone, it’s... muah! Honestly a lot of the points I’m gonna make are more nitpicks than anything. I won’t make any commentary on the gameplay because I watched a let’s play instead of playing by myself(im broke and cant afford a PS4 and $60 game >_>)

So the designs are GORGEOUS... no, the entire GAME is gorgeous. Midgar looks so good and detailed, there’s so much great implementation of color theory! Cloud is sooooo good looking!!! Barret and Aerith and Sephiroth are all GORGEOUS! Reno Rude Tseng and Rufus.. AAAA!!! The only slight complain I have is that- okay so Tifa looks AWESOME, but I honestly wish she wasn’t so skinny. Like she’s a melee fighter, but her waist and arms are so thin! I wish they gave her a bit more tone and muscle, but, oh well. I honestly can’t stop staring at the character models they look SO good

Plot-wise, I really like most of the changes/additions they made! Especially with Biggs, Wedge, and Jessie. They’re wonderful and I love them and did I mention that I love them because they’re just so dorky!!! And good!!!

Honestly, I like that Aerith is actually written to be likeable. I know that doesn’t seem like much but a lot of games fall into the trap of telling you that you’re supposed to like the female protag(looking at you, Breath of the Wild) or tell you that she’s a strong character, but they fail to show that, so the player feels like they’re just being told to get attached. Aerith, though, is actually really likeable in this game!!! She’s cute and down-to-earth, really dorky and even snarky, easily seeing past Cloud’s tough-guy act, and she can fight! It’s just so nice to see a game that shows a strong female protag instead of just telling you.

Legit everyone is horny for Cloud and I’m so here for it

Okay so like. I love Roche. I didn’t at first but he quickly grew on me. He’s so awfully chaotic and I just- I love him. I’m mad that he was just kinda forgotten, though. Like! He could’ve shown up at the ending chase!!!

THEY REALLY WROTE HOJO TO BE AS CREEPY AS POSSIBLE HUH. Like I’m not complaining because like he’s basically the reason why everything happened, but! Ahhhh he makes me squirm he’s a creep with a gross science fetish and I wanna stab himmmmm

Okay so. President Shinra is a little bit TOO stereotypically evil? Like having a gold statue of himself and not even caring about sabotaging one of his own reactors when one little console gets destroyed??? Like it’s almost comical how evil he’s written to be. Though, I do like the scene where he calls Barret out on his ideals, that was neat!

Nowww, Heidegger Scarlet Palmer and Reeve? MUAH. Heidegger and Scarlet are written so sadistically but like in such a likeable way, especially Heidegger. God I hate them both but you just love to hate them!!! Palmer is HILARIOUS- I love how he’s written to be the spoiled kid whose parents forced the other kids to include him so he’s just there even though he doesn’t do anything. And Reeve? Well...

SO REEVE IS MY FAVORITE ATM SINCE WE DON’T HAVE VINCENT YET, AND REEVE IS JUST... <3 <3 <3 Okay so first off, his design is perfect. He doesn’t really stand out in the same way that Heidegger Scarlet and Palmer do. He just has a normal build, normal suit, normal hair slicked back- he just looks like a normal employee, totally inconspicuous... which is very fitting considering how he ends up being undercover and needs to look inconspicuous ;)

Though Reeve shows clear signs of overworking himself and being emotionally abused by his coworkers which... sucks. I mean it’s good writing but I feel so awful for him- Like you know it’s bad when someone just has to hold up a hand to get you to shut up and sit down. I like that he tries to do good things but steps down when he’s told to, that he’s empathetic but cowardly. It does a great job at setting up his character arc in future chapters <3

Okay so one thing- I thought the build-up for the plate dropping was amazing, but honestly... the plate itself falling was slightly underwhelming, to be completely honest. Like- I just didn’t feel the impact that a plate falling would have! Mainly because, you don’t see a single death which is interesting. Like you see people running from falling debris, but legit not a single death is implied. Honestly? I thought the scene would have been far more impactful if they showed:

Seventh Heaven actually being destroyed

The people topside reacting to the ground beneath them collapsing and them falling to their deaths(They only tried to evacuate Sector 7 slums! Not the topside!!!)

More people actually being implied to have been crushed(No, Im not counting Wedge). Like in the original FF7 there’s a scene where someone’s watching tv and you see the plate falling from outside the window- and there’s a reporter just doing his normal shit before he suddenly looks up and things go to static- like- thats an intense scene and I wish the remake did more stuff like that!

They do great showing people REACTING to the plate falling which is why its so appalling to me that they dont show much of the actual devastation DURING plate fall

I LOVE that Cait Sith shows up at the plate falling! It shows that Reeve actually tried to warn people(something he asked to do and was denied earlier), even if he was too late. The only problem I have is that new players who dont know who Cait Sith is will be horribly confused as to who and why he’s there???

Also, when the crew goes back to Sector 7, you don’t really... feel the impact right away. Keep in mind, an entire section of city just fell onto another section of city WITH the supports holding it up, there should have been way more rubble. Yet, the area where Seventh Heaven is just... looks like it was hit with a major earthquake. There should be way more rubble, like mountains of it. It’s weird since the opening cinematic really captures the scope of how huge Midgar is, but the plate falling just doesn’t really show the scope of how much devastation there was to losing an entire plate.

The scope of it is done a bit better when climbing up Sector 7, but I still feel like the weight and scope of destruction isn’t lived up to its full potential.

Okay so- Wedge and Biggs. ... Yeah, it takes away from the impact of their deaths to have them not die. I mean, I can’t make a total opinion on this just yet, because the other parts haven’t come out yet, but... if FF7R is gonna keep them alive, they better have a good reason for it tbh.

They might have done a little bit too much foreshadowing with Cloud and Aerith? Like I like Cloud having memory issues, it’s kept pretty vague... but him going “Mother?” with Jenova is a little bit too spoiler-y. Like yeah you gotta tease his whole thing but like- don’t give it away this soon!!!

I also don’t mind Seph showing up as much as he does. Like, in the original, you don’t even hear about him until close to the end of the Midgar arc. Obvi since the remake ONLY covers the Midgar arc so far, I totally understand bringing him in sooner. Again, having the clones existing might be a little too spoilery for the big twists later on, but I can let it slide since it’s still treated as very “wtf” and I’m sure anyone new to the story hasn’t put it together yet.

Did I mention how much I love Seph he’s so creepy and his eyes are gorgeous and he’s so intimidating by just being there

And the Whispers... I honestly didn’t like them. I kept forgetting that they existed honestly. They just feel so... detached from the plot. I don’t mind adding new content/story, but the Whispers just... didn’t feel well-implemented. They also felt really campy towards the end. Like, the fact that they could un-stab Barret and shield Avalanche from car accidents while they were escaping? They were legit like “no you can’t die even if you tried because fate” and takes away any tension of the scene because... well, they know they cant die.

That being said, the ending was interesting. I uh. It was interesting! So they actually defeat fate itself in order to change... who knows what. The future, maybe even the past??? I’ve got many thoughts on this

If the future is changed, that can be exciting since people who know the original’s plot won’t know what’s gonna happen next so like- okay!

If the past was changed... y’all know I’m talking about Zack. Was fate changed so that he could live? Keep in mind, we see Whispers surrounding Midgar before they dissipate and Zack’s like “ohey did I get all of em?”, implying that fate would have forbade Zack from ever getting to Midgar. Having the team defeat fate means... Zack may have now reached Midgar.

Is alternate reality/timeline stuff going to happen now???

Cloud’s character revolves around Zack dying. What’ll happen to Cloud now???

I feel so bad for people new to the plot who don’t know who Zack is.

Nomura... you madman.

So with the ending... Nomura and Squenix is setting something up. They’re going for something huge. I uh. I fear, honestly! Because this could very likely get WAY too ambitious and WAY too confusing(Think Dream Drop Distance’s bullshit plot), and could totally fall on its face and end up being Squenix’s biggest flop of all time. But... if this succeeds and they actually pull off whatever they’re trying to pull... holy shit. I would be floored.

I honestly am a bit afraid that the plot will be too confusing for new players. Like- no one would know whats going on with Zack unless they knew the original plot, so like while this would be a great game for FF7 fans, I’m really worried that it won’t be a good game for people new to the series.

Cloud in a dress is the greatest thing and I’m so happy they kept that scene I love him so much the entire scene is so queer <3

But overall, despite some nitpicks, it was a SUPER SOLID game and I’m soooo hype to see where they go with it! I wanna see Cait and Yuffie and Cid and Vincent!!!!!!!!!

#ff7r #I RAMBLE A LOT #ff7r spoilers

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hockeytrashgoblin · 4 years

Text

High~ Part 5

A/n: Finally a Mitch part in my Mitch story lmao hope you guys like it. I already have twelve separated parts and I’m not even halfway through so that’s great.

It had been almost 2 months since I had last seen Auston on purpose. I saw him at games when I'd go with Will but we wouldn't really talk at all. He wanted space and time so I was giving it to him. In the meantime I was becoming very close with Mitch. He basically moved in with us to help me and keep an eye on me. He really wanted to be around me and the baby as much as he could.

Right now Mitch and I were sitting on the couch watching the leafs play in Florida. Mitch was injured so he couldn't go on the trip. I felt baby moving around really strong.

"Mitchie give me your hand."

"Why?" He asked distractedly reaching out his hand. I put it on my belly where I felt the baby moving. He didn't react at first but suddenly baby moved hard and Mitch was paying me full attention. "Was that baby? Did that little bean just kick me?"

"Yeah it did." I said smiling at the excitement in his voice.

"That's so cool! Hi baby!" He said to my belly putting his other hand on it. "I can't believe I just felt a baby move inside you."

"You're the first one to feel it besides me."

"Really? Not even William?"

"Baby didn't want to kick hard enough apparently."

"This is so incredible. Do you think baby likes me the best?"

"Oh for sure." I said with a big smile running my hand through his hair. Before I knew what was happening he lunged up and kissed me.

"Sorry. I'm sorry. I don't know why I did that. I couldn't help it. I'm so sorry."

"Mitch you're fine, it's fine."

"I was just overwhelmed with so much feeling."

"Hey listen. It's okay." I said holding his face and giving him a small kiss. "See? Totally okay."

"I can't believe Aus doesn't want any part of this."

"Yeah well, I told him he didn't have to."

"Why?"

"I'd rather have everyone in baby's life want it and want to love it. I want a loving environment for baby. If Auston is going to be resentful of baby, I don't want him to know baby."

"That's fair I guess. I just dont get him. He was so dead set on you. Of never leaving you again."

"All it shows me is that he's never going to change. As soon as it's not his way or what he wants he leaves. He's not coming back this time. Maybe as a friend but that's it. I can't do it again. Plus I have to think about baby now." I put my hand on my belly and Mitch covered my hand with his.

"He's an idiot. Not only did he lose the perfect girl, he also lost his baby."

"His second baby."

"What?"

"Well before I got pregnant and lost it due to the stress he put on me."

"God. I'm so sorry (y/n)." He kissed my forehead and cuddled up beside me.

"It wasn't the right time. I think things happen for a reason. Maybe I wasn't ready then."

"Everything is going good this time though right? We're at 5 months and you're doing good."

"We are yeah." I smiled at him. "Baby's kicking again."

"That's so cool. Maybe baby will be a soccer player."

"Maybe a dancer."

"There's so many things. So many possibilities. I can't wait to see every little thing baby does." He said smiling gently as he rubbed my belly. "If you'll let me of course. Sorry I keep talking like it's my baby too."

"Of course I'll let you Mitch. You don't have to be sorry. It's sweet how excited you are about this."

"It's just so amazing. Your body is creating a human. Soon to be the cutest baby in the world."

"If it looks like Aus it will be."

"No silly, if it looks like you."

"Mitch come on." I rolled my eyes but he shook his head.

"I mean it. You're the cutest person I've ever seen and your baby is going to be beautiful just like you."

"Mitchie..that's so sweet of you to say."

"Why are you crying?"

"I'm just feeling a lot right now."

"What are you feeling?"

"Good. I'm just feeling good and happy. You're making me happy."

"Good." He said kissing my forehead again.

"It scares me a little."

"Why?"

"Whenever I'm happy things go bad. I don't want you to disappear or find something you hate about me."

"(Y/n) I'm not Auston. I'm not about to leave you anytime soon. I promise."

"Pinky promise?"

"Pinky promise." He linked pinkies and gave me a gentle smile before leaning in and giving me an even gentler kiss. I tangled my hand in his hair to keep him there a few seconds longer. He pulled away and smirked at me. "If I didn't know better I'd say you enjoy kissing me."

"Well good thing you know better." I teased bringing his lips back to mine in a real kiss which led to a full on makeout session where he came in his pants. He was embarrassed but I didn't mind and I told him that much. It was nice to be close to someone besides Auston.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a few weeks later and Mitch was napping on me. He had made a habit of falling asleep on my chest, holding my belly. It was really cute and I enjoyed it a lot until his alarm went off. He blinked and smiled up at me.

"How was your nap?"

"It was great. Did you get any sleep?"

"No. I never do when you nap."

"Why not?"

"I just like to make sure you're comfortable and having a good nap."

"But you're always so tired."

"I can sleep anytime. I can't sit quietly with you playing with your hair anytime."

"You're incredible. Like you're literally so sweet."

"I try my best." I said blushing.

"You succeed." He said pressing his lips to mine. "You're too good to me."

"No such thing. You deserve the best."

"You're the best. Does that mean I deserve you?" He asked with a grin. I rolled my eyes and blushed.

"You're such a flirt."

"I'm serious though."

"What about Auston? Isn't that going to cause issues?"

"What if I really like you and dont care? Is Auston going to be an issue for you?"

"No. Unfortunately I think that being my first love he has a place in my heart but I don't want to be with him at all."

"That's fine. As long as you won't leave me when he decides he wants you again I don't care."

"I wouldn't ever do that to you Mitchie. Never. That's not who I am at all. I don't just get over someone and jump to someone else. I'm not like Auston."

"I want to be with you so bad. I have for a while."

"Why didn't you ever say something?"

"It wouldn't have mattered before."

"It always would've mattered. Your feelings matter Mitch." I said running my hands through his hair.

"Be my girlfriend."

"Mitchell be serious."

"I am."

"You realize that baby is involved here too right? Like you're not just dating me, you're dating me plus one."

"I love baby. I know what I'm asking you and what I'm getting into. If I couldn't handle you and baby I wouldn't have asked."

"This is going to be a lot of work Mitch."

"When have I ever shied away from hard work?"

"Never I guess."

"I know what I want (y/n)."

"I want you so bad Mitchie."

"Be my girl then."

"Only if you're my boy."

"Obviously." He rolled his eyes and kissed me hard. Speaking of hard, I could feel him poking my leg.

"Someone's a little excited."

"I just want you in every way all the time. Please don't make me cum in my pants again."

"You're not allowed to judge my body. It looks way different than what it did before."

"I would never. I think you look so hot pregnant. Maybe it'll be my baby next time." He said with a wink grinding on me.

"Let me get this one out before you start making plans for another." I said giggling. "I'm just nervous. I haven't been with anyone except Auston in almost 2 years."

"We don't have to do anything if you don't want to?"

"I appreciate the offer but I'm so fucking horny that if you dont do something I might explode." I said making him burst out in laughter.

"We can't have that."

We spent most of the afternoon tangled up together having sex, kissing, and just cuddling in between. It was so different being with someone new but it was so much better. I was really satisfied and very happy being taken by Mitch.

#hockey #hockey story #hockey imagine #maple leafs #maple leaf imagine #mitch marner #mitch x reader #leafs

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clanoffelidae · 4 years

Text

Firefly Rescue Chapter 1: A Running Commentary

So it’s been a DAY (as my posts have shown) but I read through Chapter 1 and here are the notes I made while reading!@lupanaoflaminar

- dude i RELATE

- oh piss off mrs meddle leave her alone, is she doing good in your class? Yes? Then s h u t

- I read the paragraph about her arguing with her mom and immediately adopted her hello yes annabelle hutchinson is my new child

- :/

- -laughs in i had 100+ tardy slips in fourth grade get on my level anna i raised you better than this-

- oh my god this poor child

- Yo i am getting some VIBES off mrs meddle that i DO NOT like

- ‘Im just trying to help you succeed. You know that, dont you?’ PLEASE STOP TALKING AND GET AWAY FROM MY CHILD

- idk i just read that and the way the paragraph was written gave me instantly creepy vibes and im now realizing i may have overreacted 😂

- Yeah okay i think I overreacted lol

- The pat calmed me down

- Im so used to teachers being antagonists in school age fiction that she said ONE thing that could possibly be taken in a manipulative manner and i was just IMMEDIATELY ready to throw hands 😂

- Watch her actually be an antagonist and kaitlyn’s gonna read my comments like ‘HAH. YOU FOOL. YOUR INSTINCTS WERE RIGHT BUT YOU WERE SWAYED. BAMBOOZLED. YOU WERE P L A Y E D LIKE A F I D D L E.’

- IVE GOT MY EYE ON YOU MRS MEDDLE

IM WATCHING YOU

- People actually carried textbooks in school??? My school district just had a set in every class if we ever needed them which we rarely did so reading about people actually carrying them around is always a wild experience

- I originally typoed ‘wild’ as ‘wolf’ and like i know that there WILL BE WOLVES so… appropriate???

- Lewis is either the love interest, fake out love interest, or brother figure

- Okay see i know what strawberry blonde means but every time i read it i just get a mental image of

And i’m always just ‘??? what do you mean that’s their natural hair color???’ and then i remember that i am in fact just stupid

- It’s not jumpy nerves if your leg isn’t vibrating uncontrollably lewis

- ‘It’s a driver’s license everyone has one’ as a 21 year old without a driver’s license i b e g t o d i f f e r, lewis is doing better than me

- Oh yeah he’s definitely going for love interest/fake out/brother his IMMEDIATE thought is to tell anna

- Ah, a stepmother

- ‘Why had they both stayed home’ they are practicing responsible social distancing lewis as should you be

- Lewis: i dont like wolf stuff

No one:

Absolutely no one:

Not even god:

The wolves later on in this book: hey

Lewis: aaaaaAEEEEEE-

- I mean dude if you really hate your family that much boarding school might be a breather

- #FeedAngeliaToTheWolves2020

- #ActuallyDon’tThat’sMeanToTheWolvesTheyMightGetIndigestion

- Hey roadkill provides a valuable source of nutrients to scavengers which helps sustain their populations enabling them to keep our environments clean dont disrespect roadkill like that

- The absolute audacity of this mad lass

- He is in fact, a mop

- … i do not think that scene was entirely pg 😂

- ‘Book for kids age 8 and up’ -they stumble upstairs to clearly have sex in the first chapter alone- me: oh okay

- Lewis buddy u bout to break ya foot

- Also please dont kick the actual wolves you might then lose a foot

- I actually really liked him hitting the steering wheel in anger that was a very real display of emotion

- Wait a minute if anna’s in school and lewis isn’t… how old is lewis? How old is anna?? He just got his driver’s license yet he isn’t in school while she is??? How old are these children????

- Lewis is skipping isnt he

- I mean mood

- Well that went from 0 to 100 real quick

- HE ALREADY HAS THE STUFF PACKED

- OF COURSE HE DOES

- Oh boy that escalated real fast didnt it

- these kids lives are just all sorts of fucked up aint they

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tacittherapist · 4 years

Text

Heartbeats quicken. The tremors return. Rose opens her laptop, glancing about to make sure she’s alone. Gods forbid anyone, especially Jade, see her revisit one of her lowest points. She craves it -- to know the bitter ennui of her past mistakes is a nectar that keeps her reality grounded and the fire under her lit. This particular memory is perhaps the worst mistake of her young life though, and to correct it would be to supp deep from the ichor of sweet relief. She pulls up the log...

tacitTherapist [TT] started trolling grimAuxiliary [GA].

TT: So. GA: So TT: It’s come to this. GA: Indeed It Has TT: And you’re still not budging. GA: Consider My Position Entirely Unmoved TT: Entirely? That seems a bit harsh. GA: This Is A Harsh Reality TT: I imagined you’d have at least granted me the niceties and lied about how malleable your convictions are. GA: Rose GA: What Is There Left To Say GA: We Have A Crucial Difference In Opinion That Cannot Be Reconciled GA: We Have Iterated Our Arguments To Each Other For Days Without Relent GA: The Underlying Basis To This Disagreement Is Presupposed On The Notion That This Infernal Game Has Shown You The Right Course Of Action Without Any Other Supporting Evidence That It Isnt Simply Lying To You Once Again TT: They aren’t lies, they’re possibilities. GA: But Only One Of Them Will Happen To Us GA: The Rest Dont Matter GA: Thus They Are Lies And There Is Just One Truth TT: Couching your beliefs that way is what I disagree with. GA: Then You Arent Fucking Listening GA: Only One Of Those Timelines Will Be The One We Are In GA: So Forgive Me If I Buttress My Language In Solipsistic Idiom GA: Unless You Can Give Me More Than One Percent Assurance That We Will All Make It Through This By Jumping On This Fantastic Savior Satellite GA: I Cannot Support Your Idea And I Suggest You Let It Go TT: I can’t. GA: I Know GA: Thats Why Theres Nothing Left To Say TT: I disagree. I think there are a variety of things left to say. GA: Do They Relate To The Problem At Hand Or Are You Stalling TT: Irrelevant. The impetus of communication isn’t inherently problem-solving, it’s to convey meaning. GA: The Impetus Does Solve A Problem GA: You Want To Convey Meaning So The Solution Is Communication TT: Semantics. I’m saying there are other avenues of thought we must explore first. GA: Rose According To You We Are Running Out Of Time GA: Is This Truly How You Want To Spend Your Last Moments With Us GA: Bickering Pointlessly On Separate Computers To Avoid Devolving Into Another Shouting Competition Which Karkat Invariably Wins TT: Would you rather I pivot into sweet nothings about how I’ve so enjoyed our time together on this desolate rock? TT: Would you rather I spin the yarn of our tale aboard this distant laboratory, slowly starving as our grist cache dwindles? TT: Must I recount our feeding calendar in which we literally take turns stemming the hunger pangs until we all eventually succumb to malnutrition and sickness simultaneously? GA: No TT: Then this is how I’m spending my last moments. Quite presumptuous of you to assume I’ve made up my mind as well. For all you know, I could be swayed and end up staying here. GA: Given You Were Just Eviscerating My Position Mere Seconds Ago As To Why We Should Stay Here Im Sufficiently Certain You Wont TT: That’s another issue. Your certainty. The Light has shown me countless avenues to success. There are literally endless timelines in which we follow my advice and everyone meets up to finish the game. TT: And yet you’re somehow unwaveringly certain that none of them will occur? GA: Your Argument Swings Both Ways TT: I don’t appreciate the implicit reference to my confusing sexuality, but go on. GA: If There Are Countless Possibilities In Which We Succeed Following Your Idea Then There Are Also Countless Possibilities In Which We Succeed Not Following Your Idea GA: Its Two Infinities GA: The Question Lies In Which Infinity Is Bigger TT: That makes no sense, infinity is infinity. GA: Yes But Some Infinities Are Larger Or Smaller Than Others GA: Some Infinities Are Not Even Truly Infinity But We Consider Them Infinity For The Sake of Mathematics TT: How does that make even remote sense? GA: While You Were Studying The Majyyk I Was Reading The Calculus TT: I didn’t realize I was speaking to Jade’s pupil. GA: You Arent GA: If I Were Jades Pupil Wed Have Met Up By Now And We Wouldnt Be Having This Inane Conversation TT: But you can become her pupil! If you just come with me. Trust me, Kanaya. Please. GA: I Trust You Rose GA: But I Cannot Go With You GA: Look GA: The Prophecy Satellite Is On The Horizon GA: You Have Not Much Time TT: Technically I have all the time I need. GA: Dave Has Sworn Off His Powers And You Know This TT: He can be convinced. GA: If Your Powers Of Persuasion On Him Are Anything Like They Are On Me I Highly Doubt That TT: Fuck you. GA: Rose

A pregnant pause passes as Rose looks over on the horizon. The satellite is indeed coming into view.

TT: I’m sorry, Kanaya. TT: I love you. GA: I Love You Too Rose GA: But This Is Goodbye TT: It doesn’t have to be. GA: What GA: Didnt We Just Go Over That Im Not Coming With You And That You Arent Staying Here TT: Yes. But if you don’t say goodbye, it means we’ll meet again. GA: Rose This Is Childish TT: If you don’t say goodbye, it isn’t the end. GA: This Is The End Rose TT: It isn’t the end. I’ll see you again. I’ll find John and Jade by myself and we’ll come get you. GA: How GA: How Long Will It Take To Find Them GA: And How Will You Find Us If You Ever Do GA: This Laboratory Is Bound To Continue Drifting Even After You Depart GA: We Wont Stay Frozen In Place Once You Leave GA: This Isnt Like One Of Those Trashy Rainbowdrinker Books You Devoured GA: This Is Real Rose GA: You Must Face This Truth TT: We are the shapers of our world. GA: Not This Again TT: We determine our own fate. GA: Rose This Is A Quote From Another Novel Please Dont Do This TT: We mold the physical to our whims and thrust it forward through our own designs. We shape destiny. We reject that which displeases us and create our own reality. TT: Can you really not indulge me? As this one last act of kindness? GA: I Will Allow You One Kindness But It Will Not Be This TT: Fine. As my last act of kindness from you, I want... GA: It Cannot Be Something Ridiculous TT: I want you to forget me. GA: What The Fuck Did I Just Say TT: Hear me out. TT: If truly everything we’ve been through thus far has meant so little that you can’t put your faith in my decision, I want you to forget it. TT: It will be as if it never happened. I was merely a phantom in this session, and should I somehow return (against your predictions), I will get to vindictively rub it in your face. TT: But if you’re right, and I never return, the pain for you is lessened. You were never in a relationship with me, so there’s nothing to mourn. I never existed. Things were simply bad, and my nagging insistence to redirect our course was never there. TT: I want you to forget me. GA: Rose You Know I Cant Do That TT: Not even for me? As your last kindness? GA: It Would Not Be Kind To Invalidate The Memories You Ensured We Would Create GA: It Would Not Be Kind To Devalue Everything You Have Done For Us GA: And I Still Cherish Those Memories Even If They Led To Something Painful TT: It will only cause you more pain if you hold onto them. I don’t want you to suffer. GA: I Want To Suffer These Memories GA: They Offer Me Some Reassurance TT: But not enough to convince you to join me. GA: No

Rose stops typing, a nerve in her snapping. Her face goes beet-red, despair swelling into wrath. She sets her claws to the keyboard once more.

TT: Then if not by your grace, I’ll make you forget through spite. GA: What TT: I want to be forgotten. I want my existence to be erased from this failure of a timeline. I never loved you. You meant nothing to me. GA: Rose TT: My departure will be a curse upon you unless you forget. Whether by magic or by will, you must forget me. All those memories I made with you meant nothing. I did those things only to ensure my own survival. Your presence was happenstance at best. TT: Now that I’m heading out on my own, our destinies are uncoupled. Whatever happens to you is beneath me. I am taking the path to victory, and you can all squander the rest of your miserable lives here. TT: I won’t come back for you. I gave you all the chances I had. This is your fault. GA: Rose Please Dont Do This TT: You won’t see me again. I’m getting on that satellite and I’m not looking back. Even if I am to die, alone on a satellite, it will be a Heroic death as the only one with any sense not to continue a cursed existence on this fucking rock. TT: I will live with only a spectre of guilt that I didn’t forcibly coerce you onto the satellite with me, chastising myself for respecting your wishes and letting you choose your own demise. TT: That is all. Goodbye.

tacitTherapist [TT] stopped trolling grimAuxiliary [GA].

True to her word, Rose closed her laptop and walked briskly to the edge of the floating laboratory to wait for the satellite to pass by. Sheer anger coursed through her veins, hoping that would mask her true intent. She had never displayed that kind of fury before, let alone to Kanaya. If she played her cards right, Kanaya might still join her, moved by the pure strength of her conviction. But there was no hesitant hand on her shoulder, begging her to stay or to join her. There was no last-second plea, no ‘Rose Wait’, and not even a footstep in her general direction as she waited.

Resigned, she boarded the satellite, breaking her word and casting a desperate glance back as the satellite continued its course away. Through the tiny window, she could see Kanaya simply looking down at her grubtop, her face stained jade. Regret swelled, and for just a second, she could feel herself begin to open the hatch and jump back towards the meteor. But the second passed, and soon she was out of range to give even a cursory wave goodbye.

The same tears begin to stream down her face as she closes the pesterlog and wraps her sheets tighter around her shoulders. She can’t keep putting off her meeting with Cetus forever... but she still doesn’t know how she’ll reckon with the shadow of her failed ploy.

#pesterlogs #long post #((by god this was brutal to write))

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