#i dont wanna get my hopes up again.. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blackkatdraws2 · 2 months

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There are more things in the Parable than Stanley knows about. [Blank Scripts AU]

#hoh boy i was going to make a comic to introduce these monsters but #i couldnt help myself and made an animation instead #because i just think they're so neat and cool okay #listen i cant for the life of me just infofump about my AU and OCs #because i just think that making actual content about my lore and stuff will not only raise the chances of people being interested #but also it will also raise my motivation to actually produce more content other than the same old recycled front-facing-profile drawings #i need to get creative with my stuff or I'll also loose interest and I DONT want that #in order to be happy with what i have i cant just think about it and expect to be given something new NOOOO i need to MAKE it ughh #i cant believe in order to get more content out of my own au i would need to draw it and feed myself ugh ugh ugh unbelievable (kidding)#but also #i wanna make a little music video or animation again for youtube #its been a hot while since ive uploaded anything in there at all #maybe an animation reel will do for now?#i hope so :(#because ive been working on expanding the Black Scripts AU #and honestly i dont regret it #i had a lot of fun making up scenarios and comics for Stanley and the Narrator (Black)#but yeah!#apart from this little video #you wont be getting an explanation on what these things are supposed to be #and why theyre there #actually i was originally gonna make this into a full fledge animation with sound effect/music/frame-by-frame movement/etc.#but i got lazy HAHA #tsp blank scripts au #tsp au #the stanley parable #the stanley parable ultra deluxe #tsp

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greatestjubilee · 6 months

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bleh

#hi all. lucy here #i have barely been drawing lately because ive just been unable to #like i feel like i lost my spark. i dunno #i used to draw so much and make so many comics when i was absolute rock bottom mentally #like the funnier i was the worse i was doing #ive been better lately but i truly feel like ive almost sacrificed my ability to draw or create stuff for some more mental stability #i just....i dont know. i feel like i can't do anything i used to do with art. like im not funny or have no ideas or just think stuff like #oh ill just draw this because people will wanna see it #but i gave that up because not even i wanna see it anymore #i hope that i can feel like drawing again one day i just dont know how to get it back. it really feels like ive lost a major part of myself #this is my rambling here just to let you know i am still around just kind of laying low because im drained

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skitskatdacat63 · 4 months

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Hello guys!!!!! Aforementioned project is finally finished 🫠 It was meant to be just a simple weekend project, and ended up being 30+ hours over the period of like four days. I don't think I'm an actual normal human anymore. This is the project that caused everyone in my life to question my mental and physical wellbeing and health. But I'm super excited to share this all of you!!!! Please enjoy!!!! Even if you don't like vettonso, I hope this is still interesting????

If you make any, please reblog this or tag me in it! I'm excited to see what other people, other than just me suffering alone in my bedroom, make out of this!!! <3

#jesus christ i cant believe i actually made this 😭😭#originally earlier last week i was like ahhh i wanna draw more of them in different eras(like the timeswap au)#and then randomly wanted to draw every single racesuit(nightmare)#and then im like WAIT I CAN MAKE A PICREW OUT OF THIS #no joke when i say i dont think i was a human this weekend #it was truly: eat. sleep. draw. eat. draw. sleep. draw. eat. draw. draw. sleep.#the screentime count on my ipad is soooooo fucking bad im ashamed dhfjfkkg #i dont think picrews are meant to be made in the span of a weekend #*weakly* i did it~#again as i said in the description. please request if you want anything added!!!#i dont know if ill get to it immediately bcs i just spent 30+ hours psychologically torturing myself #i actually feel so ill JSJFKGLGLG but im happy w it and i wouldnt have gone back and changed any of the process #tho the evolution of 'im having so much fun' to groaning every time i opened up my ipad again was so funny #thank you so much to suzuki i could have never have done this without your support and encouragement 🥹🥹#hoping this picrew works as a blood sacrifice to the good health and wellbeing of the amr24. the car that is launching today!#also istg i am going to dm shill and self reblog this with no shame. it is my magnum opus(as of now)#now i am going to sleep and not touch my ipad for a while djfkkglg #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #catie.art.#vettonso #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion

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deus-and-the-machina · 2 months

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ngl I might get crucified for this but I think the dunmeshi yuri/yaoi discourse was stupid and misrepresenting the ao3 factoids. as of today the most written for mlm ship is labru with 69 (nice) and the next most popular has less then half that at 31. meanwhile farcille has 125 out of the 154 F/F ships in the tag. it is by FAR the most popular ship, with the next two most written about sapphic ships being marcille/izutsumi (9) and kiki/namari (4) and also a couple of x readers? so farcille dominates by far

it seems to me that what's going on is that several mlm ships are in rotation in terms of popularity whereas farcille dominates as the singularly popular wlw ship.

and this doesnt mean that the issues people were bringing up about the general lack of sapphic content and the way fandom treats female characters aren't valid, but idk man when farcille fanart is cropping up daily and getting thousands of notes and has about twice more the amount of fics that the most popular mlm ship on ao3 has its like. I dont think this is really a fandom that proves that point.

I would like to see some more variation in smaller wlw pairs to make up the difference though! I dont think I see any tade/izutsumi fics and we need to change that they could be so cute.

#keeping this bit in a tags bc its a bit spicier but even without farcille actually being by far the most written about ship I dont think #dunmeshi is the best work to make this argument with bc while its got great female characters the main cast is still 3/4 and then 3/5 male #characters when izutsumi comes and she's not very shippable on account of being 17. I wouldn't sit there scratching my head as to why peopl #are writing about the multiple very relevant male characters as if its some mystery. and again farcille is still by far the no 1 ship rn #I hope that more people getting into the manga will lead to greater spreads of interest in the various minor characters bc there are many #very cool ones esp the [REDACTED BIRD NAME] are very prime for cooking up yuri. I just wanna gather up people who are passionate about #sapphic works and talk about ideas and spread the creativity and discussion I want there to be more wlw stuff and I think the only way that #gonna happen is by spreading that passion and love and encouraging other sapphic creators and enjoyers #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon

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solargeist · 26 days

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despite my previous post, I don’t know how to handle when people talk abt things I don’t know or understand bc I focus too hard on my own reactions so I don’t accidentally offend them bc there’s only so many times you can say “oh really?” before you sound sarcastic ‼️💥

#LIKE I DONT WANNA ONE RESPONSE THEM BC I HATE THAT TOO YKNOW !!#i get saur nervous #it’s an even tighter pickle when it’s a media I dislike bc I don’t like lying or being rude so I go into customer service mode #but usually I’m interested or like to hear without wanting to seek it out myself #but it’s one of those social skill (?) struggle moments where I don’t know what to do but I try . but end up nervous #job interview ass #‘’right! yeah. uh huh! really!’’ (I feel like the devil !!!)#ALSO THIS IS ALL WORSE IN PERSON BC I WILL NOT MAKE EYE CONTACT AND I THINK IT MAKES ME LOOK SOO BORED BUT IM JUST TRYING TO HEAR #ur honour im turning my ears toward you #also looking at peoples face make me feel exposed and I will immediately focus more on my position again #there is just too much work ‼️‼️‼️‼️🤮🤮🤮🤮#ive stopped trying with the eyes it’s too stressful my heart races #in my head I’m like And this is where I ask a specific question abt this part of the topic ! as if it’s a puzzle (it’s a puzzle to me)#i Hope i dont sound like a hypocrite I was mostly joking in my other post I think I’m aware of when I’m doing too much phphph

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luck-of-the-drawings · 9 days

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when i was in highschool one o my biggest coping mechanisms was drawing all the kids i hated getting killed and eaten and killed. and well. time is a slowly ascending spiral. you will find patterns.(i work as a blackjack dealer. gamblers are FASCINATING

#cw blood #luckys original content #ITS SMALL BUT ITS ART SO IT GOES ON THE ART BLOG #also wwaooooww its meee its my lil persona!!! i dont draw myself enough....#anyway i have bigger things in the works. im slowly but surely chipping away at a pd thumbnail for that pd thumbnail project #FINALLY COLORING. BUT COLORING IS SO HARD AND I HAVNT BEEN IN THE COLORING MOOD #SO IVE JUST BEEN MAKING RLY DUMB COMICS INSTEAD... OOPS..#idk if anything finished n polished will be posted here anytime soon. BUT i post wips of everything on my twitter #and i post jrwi exclusive wips on my slucky blog. you may look at those if u have Truck Art Wishdrawls. as many do. as many do #THIS BLACKJACK JOB IS RLY AWESOME BTW DONT GET ME WRONG #i work three 12-hour days ina row. i gotta take an hourlong bus up to the depths o the mountains and then #i get to stay in this delightful lil hotel that was built in an ooold hospital. its a whole casino town. and an OLD one at that #ITS GORGEOUS HERE. last week my bus home was delayed for 2 hours #so i finally got the chance to head to other casinos and try drinkin n gambling. lost ten bucks to a pretty girl. NOT the first time #i rlly wanna try it again!!! i love interracting w ppl and i love being inebriated in public bc im just so sweet and pleasant and friendly #and pretty girls LLOOOOVEE MEEEEE i think i just need to go to gay bars more #but theres fucking NONE HERE. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im collectin comrade queers up here tho #we wanna make a Group but we just gotta come up witha name first. i need something weird and strange #yknow i remember being in highschool. and being miserable n unmedicated. my mommas ultimatum was that;#if i dont drop out of highschool; i dont need to move out. she probably wouldntve kicked me out anyway bc my mommas sweet like that but #she REALLY wanted me to graduate. and i remember dreading that i might never do that #i remember feeling like the Resident Idiot. sweet but so so fucking dumb. it took me 7 years of strife n stress before i finally graduated #i remember worrying back then that i might not ever be able to handle myself out there. that i'd be too dependant on others #AND HERE I AM. DID U KNOW I WAS LOOKIN AT HOUSES A WHILE AGO? IM AN ADULT AND IM WWINNINNNGGGGGGG #IM RUNNING OUTA ROOM BUT HERES MY ADVICE TO YOU. BC I KNOW UR FUCKING SCARED TOO. THE ONE THING THAT SAVED ME.#THAT KEPT ME FROM SINKING INTO DESPAIR IS REMEMBERING ONE THING: ITS LITERALLY JUST LIKE VIDEO GAMES #MOST PPL YOU CAN JUST WALK UP TO N ASK A QUESTION N THEYLL ANSWER. THEYRE ALL NPCS THEYRE NOT REAL #LIKE IF U WALK INTO A BANK AND ASK HOW A DEBIT CARD WORKS THEY WILL HELP YOU #AND IF YOU THINK THEY HAVE ULTERIOR MOTIVES RELATING TO MONEY. YOU CAN ASK THE CUSTOMERS TOO. ITS JUST LIKE VIDEO GAMES #ANYWAY STAY SAFE KIDS HAVE FUNNNNN. IM GOING TO GO DO DRUGS NOW. HOPE U CAN DO DRUGS SOON TOO. I LOVE YOU

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odysseys-blood · 1 month

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begging on my hands and knees please pb stop killing your own game its getting quiet in hereeee

#cliffnotes/.txt #whb #its like #yeah once again i get its a small company #but the way players keep dropping bc of how hostile/predatory its already gotten with paid content #im not going anywhere any time soon but man #ITS AGGRAVATING TO SEE IM SAD ABT IT #like i said when this started in like december its just #it feels like they jumped the gun way too early #no gacha is ever gonna be player friendly i get that too but like #usually they stwrt easing up on f2p content into more paid stuff later #game launched in what october? its april #only half a year and the way i keep seeing less and less is fr sad #and like ik im just a player i dont have the answer but like #if the focus switched from pay for characters to some of the other stuff that was supposed to be implemented by now #text chats/ the seraphim dungeons/ hell even the friends feature #like theres been no word on any of that and im just pulling from the promises announcement made in january #pools already feeling oversaturated for l cards #and its just. it gets real empty feeling real fast now it feels like nothing was rly. planned well if you get me #but idk #its just upsetting to see smthn dying this fast #i wanna have hope but ehhhh...#i rly do wanna wait it out bc im not like a super devoted pb fan #but i found love unholyc when the pandemic first was kicking my ass bc going from being on campus and-#being out all day with friends to being stuck at home was...tough #and the games janky but i liked the chars #same with whb #so like. augh

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bearsizedant · 4 days

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how to not fall in love after talking for 3 weeks tutorial please

#trying not to get too attached before he comes back to the us in case we meet in person and the vibes are incorrect #but (un?)fortunately the vibes are so incredibly immaculate rn i am like. sitting there at work #ducking under racks of clothes to check my texts #i really hope it works out bc i dont wanna do the breakup shit again.#not that we are even in a relationship to break up im just that mentally ill that it feels that way to me already #can anyone here prescribe me medications to fix my brain pls and thank you <3

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softshuji · 28 days

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Any men out there wanna pretend to be my bf to get my parents off my case about marriage? I am so so serious right now.

#my mom gave me a really really lonf lecture and upset me because her and my dad want me to start thinking about settling down ans getting #married. again. cos this comes up all the time. ans I reiterated that i do wanna marry and have kids. i know im 26 years old why do they'#think im also not aware of this??? like i suddenly forgot my own age and have my head in the clouds all the time. and i got so heated cos i #said they only believe in that in theory. in reality neither of them have accepted the idea od my leaving home or the idea of mw being with #a man. and they start freaking out if they even find out i talk to them so to say they want me to get married is so fucking naive #ans when i mentioned this and that they're more than ok w mt brothers talking tp women she said that if i wanted to settle down she could #talk to dad and they could “go about finding someone for me” and I've never been so pissed #i got so upset. why does everyone keep saying this to me. as if anyone my dad knows could ever be a half decent man #and the truth is they don't care if im in a happy marriage they've accepted that i won't be they only care that im gone and saving face in #front of family. that's all. it's always reputation it's always “what will people say?”#not once did love come up. not once did shw even imply that i should marryfor love #or that they hope i love someone and marry them. because they're more happy with the idea of me marrying for the sake of it than #they are at the idea of me finding genuine lovw #im not a fucking broodmare im not here to push out babies for the sake od reputation.#and then i said nor being married isn't the end of the world and she said “it's important that you settle down”#and i said im unwavering in my principles. she can call mw high maintenance like she loves doing but I'm not wavering on the #kind of man i want to be with and when i do marry him i want it to bw genuine. because be loves me and vice versa not because im ticking off #somethin from a damn checklist to appease them. and if being unwavering on my principles means staying unmarried then so be it.#my obligations are to god and myself and that's it #and y'know what??? i am in love with a boy already #and yet they don't care that i wanna be in love at all. no im just a puppet to follow a certain narrative in life live according to evergone #else has and that's it.#im done.#and then she tried to apologise by getting me a slice of cake and that somehow made me feel worse.#i dont want an apology. i want to be heard and actually listened to for once. i want someone to ask what i want. to actually give a shit #and love me cos it's me. not cos im some thing to further an agenda. or some toy or puppet that does your bidding.#is it so much??? to just want to be loved in return? to marry and live according to how i want to?? ans not want anyone to make these #decision's for me?#ruined my whole day.

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ssspringroll · 2 months

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next project i wanna get done is recoloring my overlay minipack in the pyxis intergalactic palette and also recoloring pyxis' intergalactic into my overlay palette. for funsies.

#then i wanna work on skin tones in my palette #which i havent decided on a name for yet i just know it will be abbreviated as SSS whatever i pick #such simple swagger? some stylin swatches? ssspring's subtle spectrum? something like that.#accepting ideas if anyone has any lol #i also wanna fix up the stripes texture (again) to make an infant/toddler version #cuz it looks like they work for children but not toddlers.#thatd be grand id love to get that all ready to go #but all my files are on my. oh god. i hope my files are on my pc.#i hope they werent on the D drive cuz i dont really wanna have to remake that .psd.#it wouldnt be hard but it would be annoying #simoleon

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bunnihearted · 4 months

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🐰🩹🧸🏨

#i hate being in pain like this #bc it completely takes over my life. like im incapable of thinking of anything else #im incapable of relaxing or enjoying anything. i cant do important things. cant do anything else but sit still nd be in pain #it just renders me completely useless and makes me stop functioning properly #im just a hopeless mess made of anxiety nd sadness. idk why but i just hyperfixate on it and i cant 'let go' or relax or not think abt it #idk how other ppl do it.... i wish i wasnt like this bc it's awful. it's like the only thing that exist nd ever will exist is this pain 4evr #im dramatic i know but it genuinely feels like my entire life is over and i'll ever know is pain nd nothing will ever get better again #im so caught up in it i cant see anything else but my pain. i cant think of the future bc do i have one?? i dont know #im just not feeling good at all. and everything feels bleak and depressing and i dont want it :((#i cant have any fun or nice moments at all and im just tired of life #i feel so fkn stressed abt all the things i need to do nd all my responsibilities and idk how i'll do them when im in this pain #i just hope it can calm down soon i just want it to be a little bit easier just a little bit #getting thru each day now is so fkn hard i barely sleep but when i do i wish i never wake up #i hate everything and it feels like my future is fucked #which makes me wanna die!! but it also makes me sad bc there is actually sm i want to live for #i dont want it all to be ruined bc i want to try to live!!!! :(#and yess im know im being dramatic but i cant help it. im weak nd im terrible at dealing w pain nd issues #im not a strong person who can withstand everything nd finds ways to live either way. maybe it's bc my will to live isnt that strong #idk. i just hate this i want it to be over. it's taking over my life nd idk how to still function like this

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enden-k · 11 months

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refraining from drawing now to force myself to play through the genshin event until im done, so i can freely browse through my dashboard/tl/ao3/tumblr inbox/my fridge again without untagged spoilers