#i draw her so differently from canon its kinda funny

[sopping-wet-cat]

featuring: biblically accurate ragatha

i used this canvas for warmup doodles for two days then fell off doing doodles immediately after the page got filled :3

[its-no-biggie]

thinking about. yoohankim body swap......

mild novel spoilers ahead but no big story moments or anything just. brief mentions of skills they get later and such

okay so weve got 2 options here, right (well technically theres 6 ways to arrange 3 objects but. if we assume each of them swaps into someone else. theres 2). first one. kdj -> yjh, yjh -> hsy, hsy -> kdj. right off the bat - extremely funny. kdj in yjhs body having the time of his life (i am the protagonist!!), but also adjusts fairly quickly bc like. hes done this before. hsy in kdjs body is a menace. immediately rummaging through his pockets. everyone is unsettled by unreadable normalguy kdj making hsys evil little gremlin expressions. and yjh in hsys body is like. immediately getting bullied because his menacing aura does not work at all in hsys 5 foot frame. kdj-as-yjh is picking him up by the scruff of the neck and all he can do is glare murderously

second arrangement. kdj -> hsy, hsy -> yjh, yjh -> kdj. i think i like this one less but lets see. yjh as kdj is pretty good, i think yjh would be disgruntled no matter who he swaps bodies with but since the 2 of them are on such even footing in the narrative, i think actually spending time in kdjs weak pathetic body would make him lose some respect for him lmfao. like "what have you been doing all this time that your body is in such poor shape. pathetic." hsy as yjh is extremely salty about how op he is. muttering about cliches under her breath. definitely uses her new power to relentlessly bully kdj (omg wait that means hsys body is getting harassed by yjhs body in both scenarios..... what can i say. shes the perfect size to be bothered. the only reason she isnt bothered more in canon is because of her sharp teeth - i stand by this). kdj as hsy is. unremarkable i think. loudly complains about how much shorter he is now just to piss her off. finds an unholy amount of candy in her pockets and publicly shames her about it until she points yjhs sword at him and he shuts up real quick.

honestly i think both of these scenarios have great potential for physical comedy though. they all have such different mannerisms and such different appearances that reshuffling them is always gonna be striking. i need to draw it.....

okay lets talk logistics. do they keep all their skills or do the skills stay with the body? they probably keep them, although it might be more interesting to have like. physical skills like swordfighting and whatnot stay with the body. so if they get stuck like that for a while and end up fighting in each others bodies they kinda have to adapt to the bodies skills and fighting style. could be fun! hmmm that kinda leaves whoevers in kdjs body in the lurch though, since all his skills are mental..... and then kdj has a massive advantage, because surely the bookmark skill gets a boost if hes literally in the body of the person hes copying. so perhaps they keep all their skills - hsys avatar skill in yjhs protagonist body would be pretty op. and yjh has so many skills that he could make anything work - he might end up ripping kdjs body to shreds though lmfao. also im not sure if we get much of kdj using hsy as a bookmark in the novel? i actually dont remember an instance of it, although i can see him wanting to steal predictive plagiarism so it may have happened and i just forgot. but anyway kdj as hsy using bookmark + avatar, and then hsy as yjh also using avatar is an INSANE combo. two man army. and then theres kdjs body there like *struggling to hold up a sword* "i am yoo joonghyuk......" *passes out* LMAO sorry kdj i know youre not that pathetic its just so funny to imagine the protagonists sheer power literally destroying your fragile salaryman body from the inside out.

omg also. if the swap lasts more than a few minutes theyre DEFINITELY getting their weapons and coats back from their bodies. black coat hsy...... wait omg. okay i know kdjs coat is like a high grade magic item that changes size with him. not sure if yjhs is the same but allow me for a moment - yjh-as-hsy trying to look menacing (already failing) but his coat is way too big. its dragging on the floor. the sleeves cover his hands. 😭😭😭😭 its so ridiculous...... other notable combos - white coat hsy (head in hands). hsy-as-yjh gets yjhs coat stolen from her which means the protagonist physique is on full display - she makes a comment about how WoS should have made more use of this kind of fanservice and now she and kdj are arguing. black coat kdj..... i am yoo joonghyuk......

okay i think thats all i got for now. i hope its in character because i really havent read orv in a while..... anyway i think this has a lot of potential so i wanna try drawing it - maybe ill have more thoughts on specific character interactions once i can like,, put personalities to faces lmao

[cryptid-moose]

tattoo hcs for psych characters

Shawn: - Has a shitty, partially faded stick n poke tattoo of a pineapple on his ankle he did when he was 18 or 19 and couldn't afford to get a professional one done - He also has his mom's birthday tattooed on his wrist (professionally done this time), first line in roman numerals, the second in regular english numbers. Having that little reminder of his mom helps him during times when his mental health gets really bad. - Sometime after Henry gets shot Shawn considers getting his dads bday on his other wrist, idk if he went through with it or not tho.

Gus: - Gus doesn't have tattoos cause if his mother were to ever find out it would break her christian heart....and also she'd probably murder him lol /nsrs - He almost got a tattoo when he was drunk, but he bailed out at the last second. This actually happens quite often. - If he did end up getting a tattoo I'd like to imagine it'd be something space themed :)

Juliet: - Has this really cool floral design with lots of big flowers on the back of her shoulder - She wants to get DOZENS of other tattoos but currently hasn't found the time to schedule an appointment, especially cause most of the tattoos she wants to get done would take multiple, hours long sessions

Carlton: - He, unfortunately, committed the cardinal sin of getting your partner's name tattooed. He's got his ex-wife Victoria's name in a fancy font across his collarbone, probably another attempt to save his marriage -He's going to tattoo removal sessions tho thank god -His pain tolerance is usually higher than most people (he literally drank scalding hot coffee without screaming out in pain lmao), but getting a tattoo makes him so physically uncomfortable that i dont think he'd every get one again, despite how fun getting a tattoo of his favorite gun sounds lol.

Buzz: - Buzz canonically has had a Baha Men tattoo (removed), although this was according to Shawn so you can take that information with a grain of salt lol - Probably has a silly little lineart doodle of an alien somewhere - He and Francine have little matching tattoos of baby ducks <3, Buzz's has a cowboy hat and Francine's has a Wild Rag (the bandana thingies), the artstyle is very similar to the soft fluffy artstyle you see in older children's books, kinda like peter rabbit (but not quite peter rabbit) - Little banana wearing a cowboy hat 💪, Buzz likes cowboys and their hats - A couple doodles of his pets - He's like Kurtis Conner except not edgy (i dont actually think Kurtis is edgy thats just the only way i can describe the difference between them and their tattoos lmao)

Karen: - Has an Iris flower tattoo on her upper arm dedicated to her daughter - Probably has a book/movie quote somewhere - Other than that i don't really see her as being much of a tattoo person, she only ever gets tattoos if its something super meaningful to her

Woody: - Woody has a y2k style hello kitty tramp stamp, why? cause i think it would be funny as hell HSUADFVHUFE - He got it completely seriously too, was a gift from a "tattoo artist friend" (random guy he barely knows who bought a tattoo gun on amazon) - The linework is awful, Woody has never actually fully seen the tattoo, he just took the guy's word for it when he told woody it looked sick as hell. - Has shown it off to everyone at the sbpd, no one has the heart or guts to tell him how bad it looks, Lassiter almost did but Chief Vick stopped him - Has genuinely never occurred to him to ask someone to take a photo of it for him so he can properly see it

Henry: - You'd think he'd have a tattoo but surprisingly he doesn't yet - He would've gotten one already if not for the fact hes very indecisive about that stuff, the whole "drawing that will stay on your body for the rest of your life thing" is a lot of pressure for him - He just worries about getting something that he'll end up hating a few years down the line - Has considered getting a tattoo dedicated to Shawn on multiple occasions, but then Shawn pisses him off once more and he drops the idea again for another couple months lmao

[starclast]

INAZUMA ELEVEN: LETS PLAY FOOTBALL!!! ⚽🔥

Well, well, well...it feels a little weird to do this 😅 But anyway, lets start from the beginning.

Waaaaay back between 2013-2014, a new season of the Inazuma Eleven anime was airing. It was the now *well-known* Inazuma Eleven go galaxy season. Back then I kinda had heard the name *Inazuma Eleven* but didn't actually know or have seen anything about it (except from a parody/reference in another anime I saw before, but I didn't notice it until many, many years after 😮).

I wasn't really interested in a sports anime (because I'm not really interested in sports in general but oh well 🙄), but for whatever reason, I decided to give it a chance. I watched an episode, it was one pretty far already into the series (like 30 or something I think 🤔) so of course: I didn't have context at all of why were kids playin football against some bird aliens and showing off powers like if this was the Power Rangers 😶 But still, the bright colors and charismatic characters made me...actually kind of enjoy it!!? 😲

In any case, I decided to watch a few more episodes. Since I was pretty late into the season, I didn't have the backstory of the different team members and the reason why we where here in the first place, but overall, still enjoyed every episode 🤗 Sadly, at some points the episodes stopped comin to me so I couldn't see any more of the story 😢

Years passed and I pretty much forgot about the series (it was during this time that I actually learned about the existence of the original series and its characters tough ☝) ...until recently. You see, since last year I've been following a youtuber called: Rangugamer. It was actually tanks to him that I could finally watch the whole game of No Strait Roads (NSR) so I started to watch some of his other series too, then I noticed that Inazuma Eleven was one of them. At first I wasn't really interested in watching it but since I was pretty bored that time I decided to give it a chance.

The start was a bit rough because the story was pretty slow and the characters at hand didn't have that much of a charm but, as episodes went on and more jokes started to land better because of a better understanding of the characters and...out of hand dark humor 😅 ...I kind of started to like it! Similarly to what happened to me with Asagao Academy, since I barely knew anything about these characters, I could enjoy the weird out of character jokes and such that Rangu made every time and before I could notice it, I finished all his gameplays from the original saga!!! 🤗

And so, now that I had finished it, I decided to draw and show some of my favorites from here! 😄 (P.S: I drew most of them out of memory so some mistakes here and there may be found 😅)

First, lets start with no other than the captain itself: MARK! The prime reason why the gameplay series became so popular and more enjoyable overtime. Even if the *real* Mark is a lot more innocent and kind, its funny how Ran!Mark stills feels in the realm of canon whenever it comes to his adoration to football...Now I cannot her the word *FOOTBALL!!!* any other way 🤣

Jude is one of the few that I recognized before actually starting the series (what can I say? he is just so recognizable 😐). Since the very first time I saw him, I thought he looked silly with those goggles and cape...and to my surprise, he became my absolute favorite 😳 Poor guy had just suffered so much 🤧 ...both in canon and Rangu's version 😅 Sadly, this first try to draw him doesn't do him justice at all so, I'll try again and again until I feel satisfied with it 😤

Tooooriiiii!! 😆 I like her simple yet charming style and her endless cheerfulness. Definitely I would get along with her in real life 🤗

Shawn is a cutie. his backstory is sad (and it feels even sadder in the anime from what I heard 😢), but still he managed to move forward. Its a little sad he lost relevance in the third part of the story, but its okay, he already gave us a lot in the time he had 😊

Erik was...sadly not even present for most part of the story, so I missed a lot of his original backstory 😅 Still, his little problems with Sue during the second game and his *Oliver and Benji* moment in the third one where pretty enjoyable so, I wouldn't mind knowing more about him 😄

And finally, Shadow. The poor guy isn't even relevant to the main cast itself, but I simply love his design too much to let it just slide 😉 Besides, his *Kevin x Shadow* moment in the first game and the double Shadows situation in the second one made me laugh like crazy the first time I saw them 🤣

I'm currently still watching the go series so I may do more like these soon enough!! 🤗

[moroser]

ill say, its kinda funny youve got 2 aus where Lilith just ends up taking care of a young Hunter cuz Wow You Really Like The Idea That Much (the "when all the characters you like follow a pattern" kind of funny.) but I am also obsessed cuz...the idea of Lilith with a child is fascinating, especially with Hunter. She's already so exhasperated with Eda's childish endeavors as it is, and she seems to not be..exactly good with children per se? (the times weve seen her interact with children at least.) And she also doesn't hold Hunter in high regards and so the idea of "What if Lilith raised him when he is but a small child?" is so entretaining and I think your Vampire AU explores it in a great way!! Like shes mildly annoyed at all times but its bc shes tired and hungry and stressed out and shes also in the position of basically raising him and she knows she should be gentler with him but she cant, and thats so very Lilith. Like such a very close to canon protayal of her.

Im sorry for making this very long, I was just rotating ur aus and ideas so I had to spill em out!!

ahhh!! please dont apologize i love talking about lilith and esp that vampire au lol. and it's actually a worry of mine that people think i don't understand lilith or am mischaracterizing her, simply because i happen to draw tender things!! (i say this because i don't see lilith as a very tender person, not naturally.)

thank you for saying that about my vampire au wheeze, cause i try very hard to use that au for that!! she's pretty rough with him because she's in this position where she's forced to care for something that is both a child and a predator to her. like he can literally kill her dead. but she was also a very solitary person prior to finding him and i really like thinking about her coming to the decision not to kill him and taking him under her wing. lilith is not heartless and we see that she has a conscience about others, particularly when she's not in competition for something. (when she was younger and shared pain with eda, when she hugs eda and tries to comfort her when she's crying about luz being so young and involved in all the chaos.) but she's not maternal, she's not naturally tender as an adult, she's not someone who's had to think about caring for another living thing, she thinks selfishly. she's someone who's had her focus on herself, hiding, feeding, keeping herself going all these years. and in the au, in hunters case, i kept him as an isolated character that hadn't experienced a caring guardian or parent and even though lilith is not very good at it, he doesn't know any better because of that and because he's so young. so it's almost like lilith has room for error and to build their relationship as she is because hunter just doesn't even know.

sometimes i think about the part where lilith shields luz from the stone sleeper. she throws her entire body over her, but it's all while saying ''eda is going to kill me, eda is going to kill me." this isn't to say she doesn't care about luz, but her drive to protect her is for her sister. she doesn't... like, she doesn't naturally have this instinct to be a guardian. WHEEZE, so it is the most fun and greatest of my past times to think about lilith parenting hunter in different aus. lol. I LOVE IT!!! i love her and i love him.

before i get going too long with this i'll just say thank you again and im so happy and glad that people like the aus so much. i have a human au i am really interested in sharing because it's just so cute. it's lilith with a BABY so it's very interesting to think about it all. im a little shy 'bout this one but we'll see how it goes.

i'm also going to use this ask to clarify that i don't just shove lilith and hunter together this way cause i like the idea. of course i LOVE the idea, but i do think about it as thoroughly as i'm able to, and because i love lilith (and hunter) so much, exploring her character in depth is something i just love doing. i think about her so much rip.

[old-scalebag]

How big is he? (dragon form)

We know that Tellius dragons are huge but how big is the old man? Canon Answer? fuck if i know man, its complicated... under read more as to not eat the dash. RD spoilers Short answer for those who don't want to look: 19 ft (for now)

This has been keeping me up at night. Apologies if nothing makes sense as its 3 am rn. SO, if i were just to grab the art from the art book between him and his son.

He's not that big! Kinda funny that in this, the old man is almost as tall as his son's dragon form. This also fits with their size difference within feh which is neat:D

Buuuut nothing is simple in Tellius. Not heights, not timelines. When you battle Dheginsea with Kurthnaga in the tower, Kurth reaches around Dheginsea's mid section in his dragon form.

Now, in-game Nasir and Gareth' dragon form are close to Dheginsea's size. Gareth being bigger than the average npc dragons, and much meatier than the old man, is the one closer to his height. Ena also dwarfs Kurthnaga within battle animations. Which doesnt make much sense when you put her and her dragon form art next to kurths. Even when you scale her to be the same size as him. But whatever, lets just see how tall the old man would be.

However, there's a CG where we have kurthnaga with ena, elincia and her pegasus. So, grabbing ena and disregarding the distance between where she is in 3d space and kurth... Well, he comes out as being 4 ena tall! Now why is he tall here when in game he's a horse and a half tall? Dont know! Moving on!

Then grabbing this rough eyeballing and applying it to the art kurth becomes much bigger.

So does Dheginsea if we use the in-game height difference between his son.

Mind you within toa i have him as 7'1.4 in his human form, so if we take the tallest of his forms here he's fucking massive. 30 ish feet. If its to art book height, Dheginsea would be 5 Enas tall roughly. So about 21 feet and 3.2 inches ish. Maybe even a foot or two less.

Now despite the inconsistencies all i gotta do is simply choose a size for his dragon form right? No.. i haven't even calculated how tall he is in the 3 heroes art that appears in game...

I was gonna use perspective between where he stands and where Soan and by proxy where Altina is. However, we dont see where exactly he stands on the ground... BUT i used the next best thing! some random dudes head!

Now this is a mess but what's important is Altina and the magenta box. If there was a process sketches of this drawing i would have used it in a heart beat. Since there isn't one i had to make do with trying to decipher which soldier was closest to where Dheginsea stood. I could have used the guys in the air by dheginsea to the left however i don't then wanna measure everything via feet pics...

so grabbing the dudes head i started stacking.

Now, we kinda ish know how tall Altina thanks to an feh alt but I'm using her here that way we have a human to compare Dheginseas dragon form too. A fun tid bit, holy fuck Soan you're big.

The cyan line is aligned to be at the same angle as the old mans hips. Now lets see how big he is in this drawing.

Neat! soo what does this mean? conceptually this measurement puts his height (dragon form) closer to the third image of this post. I see his height in dragon form being roughly around 19ft. This can and could change depending on if or not someone picks up his youngest son or Gareth. Here's an image of it for those like me who cannot visualize height through numbers

[yuukei-yikes]

probably a weird question but any height hcs for the mekakushi dan?

not weird at ALL. not only does the mekakushi dan have CANON heights but i have my thoughts about them

from shortest to tallest, these are their CANON heights:

hiyori 138 cm (4'5'')

hibiya 140 cm (4'6")

mary 154cm (5'0")

ayano 155 cm (5'1")

takane 157 cm (5'1") as ene, 640 pixels

momo 162 cm (5'3")

kano 165cm (5'4")

kido 168 cm (5'6")

shintaro 172 cm (5'8")

seto 178 cm (5'10")

haruka 182 cm (6'0")

i dont think these heights are bad but i think they're a little silly, especially hibiya and hiyori. girl they're 12. they wouldn't be THAT tiny!!! ive been the same height since i was 12 tbh, ive been 154cm (5'0'') for ten years 😐😐😐 anyways. yeah. they wouldn't be that short, in my sick twisted mind hibiya and hiyori are around the height of mary ayano & takane.

which brings me to. ayano and takane's heights are a little weird, especially takane. they're mostly drawn with a big height difference with ayano being the tallest when they're actually listed with takane being 3 cm taller so they're rly the same height lol. i usually draw ayano as taller for the lols bc i love shortest of the quartet takane, so id probably either make ayano a little taller (maybe 160cm, which would put her as shorter than momo, or maybe just as tall as momo to have a more clear height difference with takane) or takane a little shorter, but i think her height is fine as is. im a little attached to the 157cm bc of how big of a revelation it was JEJDKEKD and idk mary is always described as super short when there's literally 2 other grown characters just as tall as her lol. take ur "kiddy" mary and shove it up ur ass jin ur weird 💗 mary is my height i get her the view is FINE from here.

the thing with takane is that he's got the whole Secret Identity thing like as is takane is KINDA a spoiler character? and enes whole thing is that no one knows where they came from so for a long time we only knew how big ene was in pixels ajdkwjdk and unlike everyone else she does NOT have the funny fun facts like a canon birthday or height or weight. we only know the height bc in a takane sketch from sidu they wrote next to it the 157cm and the fandom took it and ran with it. at least that's how i remember it, i was so damn excited. idk if it has ever been super confirmed (tho its been listed in the wiki for years), so i can see why its so inconsistent to ayano(and mary, who is also close to their height but we see takane with ayano more often) and his weight is listed as 2MB. thats soooo funny. mysterious weight takane sometimes it can be so #girl but also im kinda glad bc the weights are so fucking BULLSHIT.

anime when making a girl heavier than 45kg: 😱 girl are u fucking crazy. ayano and momo have the same weight? mary is listed as 130 apples heavy? its such a mess. the weights are SHIT and NOT REAL. anyways u didnt ask abt that but yeah their weights 👎👎👎👎👎 not real.

anyways. id make these characters around the same height (in the range of 154cm to 159 cm) from shorter to tallest: hiyori, hibiya, mary, takane, ayano. maybe even ayano as tall as momo. and hibiya and hiyori would probably grow taller than those 3 as they grow up lol. i think hiyori would end up in a height like momo's and hibiya would be just slightly taller than shintaro which would probably anger shintaro a lot. tho short king hibiya is also funny tbh

WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE TALLEST'S HEIGHTS. ok. seto and haruka. sits DOWN. i think haruka should be taller and seto should be what haruka is listed as. cuz like haruka is always described as like super weirdly tall and he's like omg i hate being so tall when 182cm is like. sure its really tall but i wouldn't call that a weird height??? thats like. idk to me its kinda average tall height. and AGAIN im 154cm so id know a tall person lol my little brother is 180cm (😐) and while he is tall i wouldn't say he's crazy tall!!!and seto just being below 180cm is soooooo wrong SO, to me seto has haruka's height which is 182cm and haruka is probably more around 188cm, maybe getting to 190cm just for shit and giggles. like now THATS what id call weirdly tall. maybe haruka is just called that all the time bc he hangs out with ayano takane and shintaro (shortest adult mekadan members & shintaros painfully below average for a guy height). but whatevers i do love haruka is the tallest character though lol

and the rest are ok. kido being almost as tall as shintaro is awesome. kano being short is also awesome. if im changing shit id make him as short as momo just for shit and giggles which if we go by all my other changes then he'd be as tall as ayano LOLLLL

ANYWAYS. im normal💗

[pikbro]

tell me about ur fnac oc I already love them

WAHOO YIPPEE!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM JUMPING FOR JOY

putting it under a read more bc i dont wanna clog peoples dashes with this long ass oc post LOLL

uhh ok so. her name is ivory (obviously) and shes from the fnac 2 era so shes lived in the gross ugly abandoned factory her whole life lol

her parents (cindy and blank) built her out of whatever they could find in the factory so shes kind of an amalgam of various parts from different generations of candys. thats not reflected very well in the way i draw her but trust me. it definitely was not something i thought of after i had already redesigned her

its also why shes missing an eye + the suit part(???) on one arm, they jsut couldnt find anything lmaoo. shes technically unfinished but shes Functional so whatever

shes also missing the suit part on her shins similar 2 withered blank so she covers that up with the leg warmer thingies i guess

i wish i wasnt too stupid to learn 3d modeling so i could better explain what i mean + make her real but alas. my brain is so tiny

also shes like. idk. almost as tall as blank maybe. abt the same height as the rat i guess

like assuming the thank u image is height accurate this is what i mean

shes a tad insecure abt her height bc she towers over like. every single other animatronic except for her dad LMAO

i like to imagine she was present during fnac 2 and she was jsut hiding on another floor or somethijng. secret ivory easter egg

that also means she burned along with her parents at the end of the game this is so sad

unsure if shes killed people. thatd be funny tho

i imagine shed be kinda scared of humans after being told abt what happened to blank in the first game. so idk

idk if i wanna make this littel fucker canon to her lore but i like their dynamic. so maybe. all i know rn is he jsut shows up outta nowhere and theyre somewhat close bc she sucks at socializing with literally anyone outside of immediate family

if its not obvious im jsut pulling stuff outta my ass + listing off whatever i can remember comign up with whilst walking around my house to music like an insane person

ivory is the result of 12 year old me liking the worst ship ever and then stealing someones oc so shes not meant to be taken that seriously. coherent character traits/lore/whatever is not my main priority LMAOO

anyways thajnk u for asking abt her and giving me an excuse to ramble abt my beloved creature bye

[motleyfam]

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#5

hey! so its 4am and ive just finished my, um... fifth(?) reread of world's saddest breakfast club and like! aaahhhh!!!

do u got abything to tell us abt this story? like sbt the writing proccess or things u thought that did not make it in or hc or anything really. i dont have a question exactly, just wanted to hear you talk about it. im a bit. well. obssesed.

Oooh cool question! I definitely do!

World's Saddest Breakfast Club: Fun Facts

The opening line is a result of me angsting to @batmoniker about how I couldn't figure out how to start my fic, and her jokingly being like "I got you, bro. Ready? 'It was a dark and stormy night'" and then me just being stubborn and committing to the bit.

The story started with a vague idea of "everyone in the kitchen at 3am for different reasons and Jason channeling his inner short order cook." All I knew going in was the order I wanted people to appear, what was wrong with them (sick, hurt, insomnia, etc) and what food Jason would be making for them. Everything else I made up as I went.

If I could go back and change one thing about this fic, I'd reduce how long Jason was kidnapped to like, 6-8 days, max. 16 days seemed funny when I wrote it, but in hindsight, I feel like he'd be a little more fucked up in the story if he were really escaping from that many days of captivity lmao

I headcanon Dick as the kind of person who straight-up forgets to eat when he's preoccupied, and Jason as the kind of person who cannot FATHOM this concept. Jason absolutely will miss a meal if the situation calls for it, don't get me wrong, but he's aware the entire time he's doing it and it makes him super antsy. (This once turned into A Thing™ when Jason was like, 13 years old and staying with Dick for the weekend for some brotherly bonding and Dick forgot about lunch and by 5pm, Jason maybe sorta kinda had a minor panic attack about it. Dick was a lot more mindful of that moving forward)

Bruce's favorite food being lobster thermidor is a reference to the Lego Batman movie

I wrote this whole fic with Julia Child's recipe pulled up in one tab and my google doc in the other

At some point I realized that since I started with fresh lobsters, I was going to have to write Jason killing them, and it derailed me so hard that the fic nearly became about meatloaf instead. (Never mind the fact that Jason canonically kills human beings — that's totally fine. I just draw the line at him killing lobsters 😰)

(in the end I just kinda glossed over it and made sure they were already cooked before Damian appeared so I wouldn't have to address it 😬)

Dick's reoccurring shoulder injury is a reference to the DCAU where I swear that man has dislocated his shoulder/injured his arm at least 4x

The line about Tim being allergic/throwing up when he eats eggs was inspired by a line in chap 11 of @goldkirk's fic Hymn, which I've reread about 37x

Jason is correct— grits are fucking delicious and definitely not baby food.

My favorite line is "Okay there’s self-sacrificial bullshit, and then there’s whatever the fresh hell that is."

The idea for Cass being a big meat-eater comes from a comic panel where Steph offers her a plate of rice and beans and Cass says needs meat and starts mischievously eying Steph's hamster. Can't find the panel to save my life, but I promise it's out there.

EDIT: finally found it!

Steph's nickname of "Zombie Boy" for Jason is borrowed from @audreycritter's Cor Et Cerebrum series (which is a fucking masterpiece, btw)

This fic was gonna be called "Creatures of the Night" until batmoniker said Steph's line made for a better title

Several people have asked me whether Jason was really cooking Bruce's lobster to spite him, or if he was actually intending to make it for him all along. The answer is... both? Like Jason's kind of an unreliable narrator in that he's trying to convince himself that he's just doing what he's doing to be a little shithead when deep down it's all stemming from his need to take care of his family, you know? Like he'll never admit it, but that's where his heart is at.

To everyone who's asked for a part 2 where the family finds out Jason was kidnapped, I'm gonna be honest: the main reason I don't think I'm ever going to write that scene is because I can't come up with a good enough joke for him to make to accidentally out himself ☠️

90 notes - Posted September 18, 2022

#4

Imagine Bruce starting therapy and learning about all these cool new tricks and gadgets that can help with emotional regulation and getting super invested (because I mean, c’mon, the dude’s like the king of gadget hoarding, he’s got a utility belt for goodness sake)

Then imagine the learning curve of him realizing that just because something works great for one of his kids, doesn’t mean it works for all of them, as illustrated by this memorable incident:

Jason gets really upset and starts having a minor panic attack about something

Bruce, proud owner of 14 new weighted blankets (in various styles, weights, and sizes), tries to wrap his adult son up in one to ground him

After all, Bruce himself finds them super comforting because it’s basically a socially acceptable alternative to wearing a massive Kevlar cape 24/7 like he’d do if he could

(Tim loves them too, so like, kid tested, parent approved™️)

Ends up totally backfiring when the added weight & restricted movement sends Jason into a full-blown flashback of digging out of his own grave, taking this panic attack from like a 4 to a 10

Whoops

130 notes - Posted December 6, 2022

#3

Sometimes I get really hung up on trying to make all the logistics and time frame work out in my fanfics

Then I see how the professionals handle this dilemma:

211 notes - Posted March 12, 2022

#2

I have a headcanon that Dick doesn’t actually like cereal nearly as much as he pretends to.

He just knew that Bruce felt bad about his own cooking ineptitude in the early days after taking his new ward in, so whenever Alfred had the night off, the 9-year-old insisted cereal was his ‘favorite food on the planet’ because it was something that Bruce could actually handle preparing for him without setting off the smoke alarms and it made him happy to do it

372 notes - Posted April 9, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Tim hardly ever wears seatbelts.

It’s not a conscious choice at this point really, he just never got into the habit. When he outgrew his last car seat at age five, his parents didn’t bother getting him a booster and just let him sit in the normal seat, so the belt always felt like it was cutting into his neck and he hated it. He put up a big fuss about it once on the way to some important event, and his parents just huffed, “Fine, don’t wear it then. Fly out the window for all I care” and that was that. They never forced him again.

He just so rarely has to wear one that it slips his mind. Buses don’t have seatbelts. Motorcycles don’t have seatbelts. The Batmobile has them, but they’re rarely used due to the necessity for split-second drop ins and getaways.

It’s not until he’s 17 and driving with Jason somewhere that he finally gets called out on it. Not only called out, but told in a no nonsense sort of way “This car ain’t moving till I hear a fucking click. What, did they stop showing ‘Red Asphalt’ in drivers ed while I was dead??”

(They do still show it. Tim just slept through that class)

557 notes - Posted November 7, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[miutonium]

GIVE ME THE OC LORE NOW!!!

WAIT AKDJDLAOQO I haven't think of it through aldiossjdjoq but I have 2 ocs in mind cuz like the cowgirl one is more like my unserious crack ship while another one is for an office au cuz I kinda missed doing office au for my ship hhhh

For the Cowgirl one, I'm thinking like she's a bounty hunter looking for Jack just for the money and she actually did manage to beat his ass up but ended up changing her mind and help him out from falling down a hill or something because she thinks he's cute. She literally has no goal nor history, she travels from places to places hunting people for money as a living, bounce to other places, rinse and repeat. She might have been amnesiac but she has no desire to look for it cuz she thinks it's not worth seeking for her past anyway hhhh turns out she's an alien and she's unaware of it (even though her pink skin is a dead giveaway hhh)

For the office AU, I was thinking about it because goo goo gaa gaa brain was like "Jack in white dress shirt hot" and I immediately think of him working in an office as an Office Boy running errands around the office hhh

I like recycling my unused untouched OC so I'm planning to bring back this OC of my from the dead akxjwmqoqlqldowp Her name is Siobhan and she's an accountant for the company that Jack also work at. She has to deal with a lot of bullshit from having to stay over later than usual to finish audit or deal with having to make other's work because she's basically a low ranking staff and the seniors likes to throw their work at her. She didn't really acknowledge Jack until one day she sneaked out for a smoke break at the rooftop and see Jack up there just standing. She offers him a smoke but he rejects her offer cuz he doesnt smoke which made Siobhan threw a weird look at him because why is this man at the rooftop? Anyway turns out he just likes to see the tall skyscrapers and the tiny humans walking and muses about how each of those tiny humans have their own goals and destination and we just never thought about it and he finds it oddly fascinating. Siobhan thinks he's odd and funny and decides to stay and talk and thats how they became friends.

I was thinking for this one, just like canon nobody knows his actual name and people just call him Jack (from the phrase Jack of all trades,master of none) because he does everything at the office and apparently knows a lot of things to the point even some of the people at the office finds it odd that a man in his late 20s having such knowledge hhhh.

Anyway here's the OC, she's basic but like its office AU so it should be basic and I lowkey missed her akdjosjspqq (also drawing is from 2018 so like my style is absolutely different from now lol)

[sanchoyo]

arc v 22 - 30 thoughts!!! whew these eps. set up stuff is important. also, good masumi yuzu moments.

-my god. yuya literally accidentally taking yuzus polymerization card from her and making it his thing when she practiced so hard with it. FUCKing apt metaphor for how I feel she should be the protag and shes being robbed of her role (im sorry I genuinely have nothing against yuya but shes so much more interesting to me! she feels like a classic protag!) im glad he gave it back at least…I was afraid she'd refuse it for some reason…

-I do love yuyas random ITS SHOWTIME english. tmm moment. (theres a lot of random english mixed into this series actually and it always makes me like :D!!! lol I understand!!! hehe)

-uhhh the tall fortune teller lady trying to look at yuyas fate fr and the glass ball SHATTERING AND BREAKING IN HALF IS PROBABLY BAD, THOUGH.

-24 gave some veeeery interesting implications. yuto tells yuzu fusion is the 'enemy' and weve SEEN a synchro (guy on motorcycle, so I assume synchro at least) fighting yuto too!! so. oh my god it is all the dimensions vs xyz. WHAT DID XYZ DO. THATS MY FAV CMON!!! -also very um. interesting in the implications of gx and 5ds being on different timelines I think since the implication is theyre pulling from diff dimensions all at once, right? (possibly diff timelines on top of that, since im p sure even tho I havent seen him, that ive heard arc v kaito is Kind of a Different Kaito from Zexal Kaito. whatever that may mean. canon/timeline divergence???? im SO confused LMAO I thought 5ds was a straight shootoff from gx/dm! I know zexal makes things a bit fucky since I think it implied 5ds didnt Happen, but?? before that I assumed it was a straight line...am I wrong tho...(dont actually answer I wanna figure it out on my own..)

-masumi!!!! being a BOSS at dueling and her two lil dudes being SUCH hypemen for her. we love itttt

-idk if theyre setting shun up as a bad guy or whatever or deeply traumatized. but everytime he xyz summons im like yessss king slay (but not my girl masumi!!!) 16400 attack monster!!!!! with an epic fire bird!!! im obsessed w his aesthetics if nothing else. kinda epic hes putting ppl in cards actually to draw reiji out and wants to take him hostage. i think i side with him bc hes at least cool about it. if youre gonna be morally questionable your vibes better fuck severely, and his do.

-yuzu kinda having a hotgirl summer moment by falling in love with an emo version of her bff LOL get it girl!!!

-oh shit LMAO REIJI STRAIGHT UP SAYING 'no my dad doesnt give a shit about me, taking me hostage would not work' with a straight face!!! DUDE U OK. this IS ygo so daddy issues come standard with every character but CHRIST. and shun being like 'wtf do u mean' HE SAID IT OUTRIGHT DUDE. DONT BE DENSE.

-shun getting told by reiji 'i have ONE condition' then WALKING AWAY BEFORE TELLING HIM and shun being like HEY?? dude this guy has been assaulting ppl/trapping them in cards and ur just?? walking away??? reiji has massive balls and is so funny (I know its more intended to be a cliffhanger, but its ygo. the solution is gonna be to do a series of duels, of course)

-junior, jr youth, youth in the tournament, so being like, little kids (I assume like 5-12ish?) then middle schoolers 13-15? then the youth class beng teenagers up to 18? thats my assumption bc 'pros' seems to indicate adults, and pros arent in the tournament. reiji specifies this is a tournament to find 'spears to fight' for him. WHY are you using CHILDREN instead of pros dude??? christ with your resources theres no NEED for that right???

-but hes fighting his dad and claims to be on the same side as shun, which. surprised me ngl. reiji team xyz!!!! win for the gays everywhere!!! and he has daddy issues!!!!!!!!!!! king.

-honestly, it raises the question of who the 'good' guys are in this battle? reijis up to use child soldiers and to work with a guy who is willing to trap ppl in cards. yet yuto made a point to say its bc they lost friends and want to protect ppl. we dont know what the other side is fighting for. it FEELS like both sides are willing to do Whatever Morally Grey things they need to, which is SUPER interesting. I mean, we havent SEEN the other side at length yet! except sora, who it was on SIGHT for when he saw yuto! so I'm willing to bet hes got the same 'whatever it takes' attitude…I want to know WHYYYY theyre fighting!!!)

-theres a duel school where idols go to learn to duel??? THATS SO CUTE. mikiyo naname ilu i know ur gonna show up ONE time but cute design

-no one told yuya hed be doing the lil pre-tournament speech!! yes he might want to be an entertainer but my god anyone would be anxious with like zero prep or warning! tf nico

-one of the announcers says juniors solid vision ar stuff is 'very soft like a sponge' why the hell is all of it not like that?? its fine for anyone over like 13 to get injured dueling ig! lmao!

-omg masumi being like 'tf are u talking abt shun has always been on our team' GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS MOMENT LMAOO (or some level of brainwashing, who knows, it IS yugioh)

-its refreshing to see some good parents in ygo who are involved for once, lol, all the kids parents there to watch them duel and cheer them on is sweet!

-layra is like. Deeply Traumatized and just seeing the councilwomen sends them into a PANIC I need to run into traffic to protect them (the subs call them a boy but?? quick google says girl so for NOW I'm being neutral w pronouns until further confirmation from the show ig) they were up there with reiji earlier too! tf are u making a traumatized child duel for dude! losing favor points with me very quickly reiji. putting ppl into cards is nbd but traumatizing kids? no. gotta draw the line somewhere man

-ayu's deck is aquarium themed!!! my god thats SO cute all the kids have rly cute themes. but she forgot she cant attack on turn one…girlie thats the basics…(everyone was cheering her on for the mistakes and encouraging her which is sweet tho)

-then its extra sad when ayu loses and still has ppl comforting her and being sweet and layra having NO ONE ???? EXCEPT REIJI WHO JUST OFFERS (1) HEADPAT. also 'niisama' yeah I expected as much, ygo rival Standard. give ur sib a HUG or something. (maybe theyre touch adverse, I dont know. they do seem. Deeply Traumatized sjfkjnkh)

-lmaooo sora and yuzus friendship Continues to grow on me. his pic of her in his contacts is her smacking yuya with her fan! and she calls him to be like 'YOU BETTER COME ROOT FOR ME OR ELSE' i love how she combats his very wishy washy noncommittal attitude…he says its bc hes her teacher but cmon u guys are friends, prob more than anyone shes soras friend fr by now right?

-YESSS YUZU MASUMI DUEL theyre both doing great I LOVE their dynamic in my mind THIS is what a ygo protag and rival should feel like (sorry to reiji, but he just doesnt feel rival-y enough yet to me!! cannot even explain it) the gay instinct to have a rival. the whole 'im better than you' attitude, the fiery competitiveness…wanting to prove them wrong, the thinking abt them so much u can predict their moves..its SO spicy. then the giving of the red rose card after getting saved by yuzu…masumi? are u perhaps. fellow gay?

-despite all of my efforts sora is growing on me. hes SUCH a brat and is honest about it (and doesnt rly do the whole fake cutesty thing as much as Id expected he would) I think hes actually been as honest as he can, maybe? like I assume theres a good reason he hasnt told the others hes..involved in some kind of?? inter-dimensional battle?? situation??? Im not entirely sure I think hes gonna be a full out traitor or anything, but the others will prob be upset when they find out he's been withholding info…but I 100% think hes some kind of child soldier who BELIEVES his side is right, just like im sure shun feels real justified sealing ppl into cards! (and unlike shun we havent SEEN sora DO anything bad yet. I just kinda think he HAS based on his deck being so creepycute and him not being straightforward, but again, him continuously asking if he was even allowed to be teachign yuzu stuff makes me think hes taking orders from..someone...) him so mad shun didnt stick around to see yuzu's duel was so funny. I dont WANT him and yuzu's silly lil friendship to end! im attached now! even tho I KNOWWW hes sus! :(

-in the crowd you can see ppl wearing cute duel monster accessories, like one girl had a dark magician girl headband/visor thing! very cute, wish we saw more things like that. in pokemon anime they do that a lot and its always such a delight…I want more duel monster cosplay moments! or references in charas outfits!

-ok yuya being the damsel during gongenzakas duel while yuzu is the one yelling, telling gon not to worry is……furthering my idea that yuzu is main chara and yuya is in the position of side character of different gender than main character (who is often a damsel or person to worry over the most). hes the anzu/kotori of the show. to me. JKJSDH (also, gongenzaka, is perfectly nice and fine but its so hard for me to care deeply about him aaaahg even with the episodes centered around him…hes so straightforward and steady, tho. good for him.)

-….the guy who gongenzaka's dueling should be disqualified. he had his goons try and jump yuya! god why isnt he automatically disqualified! doesnt the broadcast pick up audio?? he like, admits to it!

-....is shingo supposed to be yuya's rival actually, instead of reiji? ...he doesnt feel like a rival either though!!! or if he is it feels one-sided!!! yuzu was more ready to fight him than yuya was!!! jkahjkf anyway that duel is up next episode which I wont start tonight...but I'm excited to see more shingo. bc I think despite his best attempts at being a threat hes super silly actually...

[wulfums]

tell us about your bjh s/i / selfship!! i love the show... i've watched its entirety a few times now. what's he like? how'd he meet mr. pb? does he get along well with the other main characters, or not?

OMG so!

I have a lot for them - I started self shipping with Mr Peanutbutter when the first season aired, before the show got big. So I was the only BJHM self shipper back then so I was kinda well known for it (like people would send me fics in my asks...miss that)

My guy is named Deerdog! His real first name is Rex but he just gets called Deerdog. He's a purple tufted deer (The deer with the fangs!)

Here's an old image of them- it was submitted to me on anon back then and I never knew who did it. It looks So Canon that I wonder if a crew member did it(Once again, if anyone knows who Did draw it, lmk!)

Here's a more up to date pic of them together by worstie @sapiosexual-riddler (Worstie because I hate its username </3 /lh)

They met when Deerdog was a showrunner on a cartoon that Mr Peanutbutter was cast as a guest star for. Funny enough- BoJack originally had the voice role but Deerdog found him SO insufferable that he kicked him off the show. So he was expecting more stress recasting at the last minute- but Mr PB actually ended up making him laugh and to him, really did embody the character who was very sweet.

Deerdog made soooo many excuses to be around him- this was before Mr PB dated Diane(Deerdog is a lot older than he looks. He's cursed with babyface like me.)and PB happened to be single...so Deerdog shoot his shot and got a date. They really did hit it off well. The main issue was- Mr PB was very passive in standing up for Deerdog with other celebs. Deerdog had not had top surgery back then so he looked feminine. PB always got the pronouns right, but wouldn't always correct others who didn't- which wasn't alright At All and is why they ended up breaking up despite being good together otherwise. There was also issues with Deerdog's unmedicated/uncontrolled BPD. He did lash out and struggle with jealousy- a lot. They really both had their issues and it was best for them to split sadly.

So, flash forward to current day Hollywoo. What changes from the canon version is PB only dates Pickles for a short amount of time- she realizes a lot sooner she should *really* be with someone that 1. Wont cheat on her and 2. Is better (Joey Pogo My Beloved). In the show after they broke off, it's clear Mr PB is taking a break from dating. Well- dating women. I think he thinks back to the one man he dated...Deerdog. He thinks a lot about it for months and months- over the fact that he and Deerdog probably got on the best out of all his relationships. The fact that there wasn't the age power imbalance(Which...king this shouldnt have taken you SO long to figure out was an issue with your relationships but hey at least you finally did. Unlike SOME people. Staring at the fucked up horse.). They both had the same love language. Even after all this time, PB still thought about him pretty frequently. His other exes he was able to fall out of love with but IDK...Deerdog was different.

So he ended up finding Deerdog's art instagram and DMing him. Deerdog was honestly very surprised- he had been out of the TV/Movie game for a long time and was just doing indie projects now- he honestly thought PB had forgotten about him completely. He still had his aprehension- the main reason he hadn't really dated much since the breakup was due to society's transphobia which, sadly, had only gotten worse. But he agreed to meet up with PB.

When they met up for coffee at Starbarks, I think they started with small talk and then an awkward silence...and PB apologized for not sticking up for Deerdog- explaining that it wasn't OK. Deerdog was Very taken aback by this and maybe started tearing up a bit. The bar is on the floor but it was passed at the very least. Deerdog also explained he was very sorry for his behavior back then- he's since gotten therapy and mental health help, and if PB was open to it, he'd love to be friends again.

And well...they didn't stay friends long. Because they started dating again a few weeks into being Friends again. This time it goes much, much better. Their time apart had allowed them to grow as people.

Long Story Short, they DO get married- and everyone thinks it's going to end like the last ones since they had only been dating a year...but it didn't. It lasts- it's still going. They absolutely have issues sometimes but they're able to use coping skills and communication skills instead of letting themselves bottle it up and get mad about it.

Their ship name is Peanutbutterjelly btw

[teeto-peteto]

Out of curiosity, and I apologise for any inconvenience, but what is it about Pyke that makes you so endeared with him?

okay at the point im writing this its 16:45 pm, im european and im going on and off writing between games, drawing etc. this is probably and im not joking the longest, hugest post i have ever written not only on tumblr but in any social media in general. I had to take notes to reorganize my thoughts cause trust me, there's a lot of things to unpack.

Short answer: cringely grabs the microphone while blushing ...i ...i like him...

Long ass fucking answer omw to make the longest tumblr post in history: My relationship with Pyke as a character its, somewhat, funny. Pyke was released after Zoe, and Kai'sa, and Neeko was released after him. In 2018 there was this ''drama'' around League Of Legends fandom where people was tired of, what they call, 'Disney style characters' like Zoe. Kai'Sa release didnt help the ''drama'' as how the character was designed and put together. I didnt mind much about the 'Disney style' drama cause, everything that has sparkles and glitter on i love it. Then this motherfucker came into picture. His new champion teaser popped on League Of Legends youtube channel and in the game client, and of course, i had to peek my eye.

Im saying this now, and I am being completely honest:

I hated his guts, i despised him.

I didnt like him, at all. Not that i was 100% only sparkle champions, but i hated him. I didnt understand him, i didnt get the design, and i again thought that Riot was pulling again on male champions being shirtless and just talking about war and fist fighting while being edgy. I vividly remember one of my friends asking my thoughts on him after the trailer was out, and i told him that i didnt like Pyke at all, i actually did hate him. But...

I literally changed my opinion in just days

I dont know what part of my brain activated or deactivated, but i blankly stared at this guys trailer and the leaked splashart and... i changed my mind. He went from a champion i was not interested on at all to stiking my chords like no other champion has ever done. I started liking him without a reason at first, unable to pinpoint why i suddendly changed my mind. I waited for his official release, and oddly enough, i started playing him. Im not used to play male characters cause its not my comfort zone but... Pyke felt... different somewhat? Im not even used to play engage/hook characters but i felt like playing him.

When his release was out in 2018, i was already on my first year of Art school, and i vividly remember being on the computer schoolroom for homework with my class and I started reading his lore in the computer screen trying not to get catched. I snucked out of classes to go to the bathroom and read his lore and short story, see fanart and the tldrs of his designs... I was literally behaving like a little girl when she sees a cute guy, and, techically speaking, its what was kinda happening. I had the shortest 'enemies to lovers' arc in history cause i hated him for, maybe, less than a week.

Lets talk about lore!! Yipiee!!

Focusing on League's original lore, we can see a glimpse of who Pyke was before becoming an undead. My views on his character are a mix of my personal thoughts of him and the canon lore. Seeing this little glimpse of the man he was before that he never wants to talk about again is, interesting. It makes my mind wonder. Did he believe that he was being underpaid and exploited as a butcher? Did he think that captains and rich/powerful people abuse their power? Did he ever raise his voice? Was he prideful, and its why he doesnt want to talk about his past self? Or was he just too naive to know and its ashamed of it? Pyke is the type of person who is not talkative, but that is very reflexive. As the other side of the coin, Illaoi is also very reflexive but clearly expresses her thoughts without filter. The fact that he was also a buhru makes my head spin. It makes me wonder, why didnt he stay with them? Why didnt he look for a job within the buhru, instead looking for it on the city? What was the relationship with her buhru mom? What happened to his dad? Was he around, present at all? How many time has passed? What is Pyke's actual age?

Pyke's tragedy is, to a very lower extend, relatable. Its easy to identify with him. Everyone's got their lifeline cut sometime. But what is truly interesting for me and always has me craving to hug this man is the extent of his trauma.

In 'And then, teeth', Pyke has flashbacks of his death after killing Mazier and staring at her body. He can remember how dark it was, how slimy it felt, how he couldnt see well because of the sweat covering his eyes. How he tried, with all his forces, to escape to no avail. Pyke also seems, somewhat, lucid at times. Allow me to explain. Pyke is still him, that is clear. Yes, he hears voices, and they are always there, but he is still his own person. He is able to remember things from the past, he's able to act by his own, to think by his own, but the voices are always there. When i say 'lucid', i mean when he's either killing, or interacting with the list. In this short story, Pyke stares at the list, after killing Mazier, unable to believe that he actually did kill his whole crew, but suddendly comes to a normal, realization, 'Where did i get the ink?'.

Before killing Bekke, he says that he was there, watching him die, smiling. Makes you wonder if he's actually talking with rage and bloodthirst, or, if he's actually talking seriously. What if, he was talking seriously, but not being literal? We know Bekke wasnt there, he is not even from Bilgewater. But what if Pyke actually meant that, every single captain, every single person with power, constantly watch him die? constantly watching the people working for them dying, only for the powerful ones to become richer? Is he actually completely doomed at this point, is it a mix of both the voices and his own thoughts? Or is he just... him?

People that isnt much interested in his lore often thinks hes a mindless killer. Not that in mad, i think its stupid being mad about it. But to say that it's a false state, its valid. Pyke would never, ever lay a finger on someone he knows its fully innocent BEFORE killing his whole crew. 'But what if Bekke, for example, was just innocent? Maybe he was powerful but a good man?' I think thats to very own interpretation. What can i say, i hate rich people ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ im good with my man killin them all, slay. To some extent hes kind of a Robin Hood but bloodier you know? In the end he steals from the rich to share the gold with others. Gold that he wished he had back when he was an underpaid butcher.

Back to Pyke's trauma again cause i got lost on my own notes, its interesting how he behaves. As someone as introverted, and after becoming an undead, you might believe that Pyke now doesnt trust ANYONE. He doesnt leave his guard down, never trusting never believing anything. But... its completely the opposite. Its clearer on his in-game interactions. 'I needed help back there' and 'I work better with a crew'... waahhhh. But you know where this becomes even more clearer?

Ruined King baby

I want to marry him. I want to marry Pyke in general but Ruined King Pyke hes a baby and i need him i want to pat his head and tell him everything is going to be fine AUGH. How he settled up with a bunch of random people, allow me to say, after one of them wooped his ass, and with a captain, clearly a target for him, and he was OKAY with it. What a king. Slay.

Illaoi removed his voices, thanks queen. And you know what we see? Pyke behaving like a more troubeled person than a violent one... It blew my mind. The fact that he sharpens and cleans his knives and harpoon because he's stressed, the fact that he talks passive aggresive with Illaoi even if he's thankful. The fact that he likes Sarah enough not to kill her, and that he trusts her. He's able to trust a captain, even after what happened to him. It broke me. It broke me seeing his relationship with Ahri, how she was sorry, how she just murmured 'thanks' and then stood quiet when Ahri said to Sarah that he was, probably, never going to be able to explain the complexity of his trauma and his feelings. Seeing him having nice conversations with Braum and Yasuo... seeing him feel, welcomed... you actually feel good for him, if you have been stuck with him in your mind like me for years you actually feel happy for him. Pyke has friends. It makes you also wonder about the end... Why did he go? Why did he never say goodbye? Its true he said that once he was done with Viego, he was out, thats his only achievement. But... in the end, we see him go with Braum, Ahri, Yasuo and Illaoi to the tavern... Did he change his mind in the way? Did he just randomly turned the opposite direction? What the hell hapenned i need to know. This game made me cry. Not with the end. This game made me cry everytime this guy opened his mouth. Because he's relatable at some extent. And knowing that at some time later, if Sentinels of Light was canon and better written... Pyke would have been betrayed. Again. By Sarah. Someone he trusted blindly again. Can you imagine? How could have that developed? Would Pyke ever be able to trust again? Would he return to his patterns or would he just promise himself not to ever trust again?

Something i really liked about Ruined king lays on the early hours of the game, when we first see Pyke when we play as Illaoi. She calls him a monster, an abomination. But Pyke refuses to fight, even if he considers it an interesting battle, he refuses, because he has no reason, confirming that Pyke's kills are always selective and he would never hurt an innocent, even if you treat him poorly. I have talked a lot about Ruined King so ill try not to over repeat myself. Lets talk about

Design queen slay yass pop off

I just think he's neat! Look at that guy!! They made a marbelous job. Referring to all his models and concepts of course. Its the creepy but cool looking bandana with the teeth that gives him that eery, but also dinstictive colour focus on his design. The bone jaws around his shoulders reminding us about his death, the ripped cape, the fish teeth and teeth knives hanging from his belt giving him this 'shark' style everyone likes to explore on him... the gloves, the nails in a lot of concepts and promotional arts, the now grey-ish tribal tattoos representing his past as a buhru... The list hanging from his side, the boots with spikes to work... Something i like of him in League is the CTRL-5 animation where you can change his harpoon to how it probably looked when he was alive to the eery, phantasmagoric and murky looking one. Its an amazing touch. I love his design and i love that they didnt go for the typical 'drowned pirate spirit'. He looks so neat. The scars, the eyes... the ropes hanging around, the baits hanging from his cape... waahhh

Point number 2343939

............he's pretty..............

im going to hell and its his fault. What can i say? I like him.

Moving onto a more serious, and now probably more directly answering your question. Why am i so attached to him?

Yes, i do like his lore, and i have a bunch of questions i love to fill the blanks myself with own headcanons, i do like his design a lot aswell and i loved him on Ruined King, and i love playing him on league.

But, Pyke suddendly became a recurrent thought on my mind. I wasnt on a very good moment back in 2018. I felt undesirable, in all aspects, my group of friends wasnt the best back in the day and i was often ignored when i vented about trauma. I then suddendly saw a character that i could relate to, but that was also strong willed, and stood up for himself. I realized that, maybe i just wanted someone to protect me. Its a thought that sucks, not being able to protect yourself and seeking others to hide behind. But... he was there on my mind in my darkest places, and honestly? he hasnt left not even a single day. Made me thought that, maybe he would actually listen through my problems, maybe he would have stood up for me and protected me, maybe he would take the care i desperately craved for real people to give me. Sometime's hes the only reason i decide to get up from bed and do anything, i dont have it the roughest but i struggle emotionally with a lot. He's like, my emotional support, ironically, he's a support champion, haha, funny.

I then started interacting and seeing people who also formed these bonds with fictional characters, and suddendly i didnt feel that weird. He makes me feel like a little kid in love, and... it helps me heal. It keeps my mind busy, and i like him a lot enough not to get tired from thinking about him. Skins and AU's are helpful cause i can also explore other contexts of him, other things i didnt ask myself yet...

Getting sappy, i love everything about him. And it makes me happy seeing people that also love everything about him. I love it. I love him. And its been 5 hard years, but that also contains a lot of healing thanks to a random character from league of legends.

Woah! Its 4:06 am! thats a while haha. I missed a lot, my mind was fuzzy. Well, i have to go back to my day dreaming <3

[heinzpilsnergonewild]

My superego: I need you to draw something meaningful and relevant My ego: well, I consulted with our id, and according to it, we only have energy for a lazy self-indulgent sketch of Vegeta with his hair wet. Superego: …ok, just draw at least something, you depressed little shit.

yep, mysterious dark shadows from below to the rescue, no naked dudes in this blog

Actually, Vegeta with his hair down always gave me a strange feeling. It's like looking at him makes me recognize something, but I can never figure out what or who it is exactly I recognize @__@ perhaps some archetypical stuff again I dunno

---

(~ I remember the naive time when I first watched the shower scene in dbz and thought: "Why do they always show him of all the characters naked? Do they think I enjoy looking at that little monkey's bare ass or something? It's getting really weird." … And I still think it's a bit weird lol.

~ So, there are several different versions of Vegeta's physique in the canon. I kinda like the extreme one for its expressiveness (and alienness?). But his palms definitely should have been bigger here lol Still, I wonder - with such ridiculously broad shoulders and a narrow waist, could he ever sleep on his side lol? … I'm only half kidding here, actually. It looks pretty uncomfortable. Perhaps I'll try to draw a more elegant version of him later as well.

~ A funny observation: when I design his figure this way (compact torso + broad shoulders + thin waist), he looks ok to me right up to the moment I try to dress him in human clothes. Then he looks terrible in basically everything lol. Seriously, he reminds me of a chest of drawers on little legs with a potted plant on top. I guess it would be a real pain in the ass for Bulma to make her husband look presentable to a human audience lol. I can just imagine her hiring stylists in desperation, showing them Vegeta's photo and saying, "Ok guys, can you do something about this?" And they're like, "Weeeell…that terrible hairdo has to go?.." And Bulma: "It's out of the question." And stylists: "…Oh dear.")

Tbh I don't think I'll be posting on this blog often anytime soon. Really shitty time in my life, and I mean really. But hey - who knows.

[the-hydroxian-artblog]

How do you go about designing robots? They all look so cool

TL;DR If you want to design a robot, that means you probably have ideas as to what a "cool" robot is. Find out what you think is cool, think of any backstory you think makes sense, then use existing robot designs as inspiration to figure out the visuals.

I wrote up something really long and rambly, and I'm gonna leave those extended thoughts below anyway; I apologize if this gets too dense and wordy, but to be frank I still gloss over way too much in it, as it's a really big question to answer without being reductive and frustratingly vague, or on the flipside making entire-ass tutorials/process essays on how I made all of my robot characters. I also made a guide for designing ruppets before that sort of answers your question, but I warn you that it's purely text, in-case you were hoping for some visual tutorial.

In any case, on with the ranting.

Honestly I'm more of a worldbuilder, so when I get this question I immediately jump to answering it from a storytelling perspective, not a simple "how to design a badnik" tutorial kinda thing. Robots are made for specific purposes. If they lack purpose, this can be a glaring issue, or a great trait towards your robot's backstory. Figuring out the backstory is pretty crucial, and the sooner you know that, the sooner you'll be able to ride your intuition and figure everything else out.

There's a LOT that can go into it, but there's two aspects, visual and descriptive, both of which are kinda the same thing but kinda not.

Descriptively, good robot design depends on the setting and the story told through text, and depends mostly on whatever one's heart wants above all else.

I come up with a premise I really like/want, and then ask questions to rationalize/reason backward to justify it. What do I want? Why, in its own universe, does it exist?

With these answers, you can figure out how to answer the visual question: How would this thing look like, then?

Possibly my most popular design, Splats, can answer these questions with both a visual and brief-enough flavor text to supplement her. Hopefully.

1. What did I want? A modern version of Splats, a scrapped Sonic 1 badnik. I thought it'd be cool. People apparently agree.

2. Why, in-universe? Why was Splats upgraded? She was meant to be scrapped in-universe, but didn't get the memo. Used abandoned eggman factories to repair and upgrade herself.

3. How, visually? How would she look like, then? I took elements like her thighs and tails and eyes, and made them more mechanical, taking some inspiration from P-Body from Portal 2, badniks in Sonic Colors, and toys with springs in their torsos. Also, of course, I took inspiration from artwork of Splats as well. Bash these together, and you'll likely get something like this. I wanted to stay somewhat faithful to the distinct shape language of the original, while adding something new and refining it as well as I could manage.

Another example, this time in my own OC canon: K-55, a one-off design I whipped up for fun.

1. What did I want? I wanted to draw a funny bird robot that had a serious/morally messy profession. The concept is funny to me.

2. Why does he exist in-universe? He wasn't built to look like this specifically. He was more of a standard robot for basic tasks that modified itself to look this way due to an eccentric personality. He has an eccentric personality because having certain quirks in robots can lead to them being creative problem solvers. This has a side-effect of them often dressing themselves up in different ways, whether alienating or appealing. That basically gives me the excuse to make him look as weird as I want.

3. How would he look like? A mess. Visually, he has a bunch of noticeable funny shapes working together to create a distinct, odd outline. His face is a bit wall-eyed, and he has a strange "hair style", which imply strange tastes. With the clear implication that he wasn't designed purposefully like this by anyone else, the design sends clear messages about his personality, and how unhinged he is.

One last example: Kaita, my beloved.

I wanted a cute, strong, robot wolf woman with a very friendly personality. The idea of a robot wolf woman is absurd on many levels, but I reason she was made as a weapon of sorts, but got misused and now lives her own life. This answers What she is and Why she exists, so lastly, there's How she'd appear as. In her case, I basically just figured she'd look like a furry terminator with exposed internals in some parts, large claws, etc.

There's many different ways to go about that, but by answering the previous questions of What, Why, and How, I can at least not go in blind as I develop the visual aspect of her design, and see if I'm being faithful to the concept. "Nice Terminator Wolf Lady" is basic in premise, but with tons of room for experimentation in execution. I designed Kaita years ago, and only in the past two or three years did she really look consistent.

[captnjacksparrow]

Not exactly SNS but I just think it's funny how Naruto liked Sakura for literally his entire life (from the beginning of Naruto to the end of Naruto Shippuden) and they kinda just randomly stuck him with Hinata with no real closure or end to the Naruto liking Sakura thing. Its so wishy washy and sudden that even if you were someone who liked Naruto and Hinata together, you wouldn't be quite satisfied with.

If Kishimoto was gonna make such a bad ending and continued to ruin his legacy with Boruto he should've left the ending of Naruto open ended. OR, hear me out, made SNS canon, 2 middle fingers up to the haters and fall of the face of the earth, just never seen again. Maybe on a private island with the loads of money he made from Naruto.

Uhhh....????!!!!! 🙄🙄🙄 Entire Life????

Since when did this development happen which I failed to watch??? Where are the clues??? I think, Anon, You must start to READ THE MANGA instead of watching filler stuffs. 

Movies, OVAS, Filler Episodes are not canon.... In the movies, SP tried to portray a different Sakura (a pleasant Sakura) from how Kishimoto originally designed her (A total Ass-Hole)... Kishimoto had nothing to do with any of those fillers. 

I’ll tell you one thing..... There are few drawing errors, unresolved plotlines and minor plot holes in this story. Yes, I agree with it. But plot wise.... Kishimoto gave every characters a reason for why they do what they do... It’s not random, it’s not meaningless or anything. NaruSaku bond is one such. 

Naruto never loved her.... Not in the beginning.... DEFINITELY NOT TILL THE ENDING. I think I wrote 2 big posts with all the valid panels to make sure of that. [Post 1] and [Post 2]. In Both of these posts, I focused only on NS but it will blatantly give you SNS vibes throughout.... Because NS bond was built upon the foundation of a 3rd person called Sasuke. Without Sasuke, NS is nothing.

Again I repeat..... NS is a Red Herring Bond in Naruto series to mask Naruto’s feelings for Sasuke. For Example, Say you have a ‘Prophesized Saviour’ thing in a TV series.... All the Prophesies will be fulfilled by Character A which will be blatantly evident to our eyes and will make you believe that Character A was indeed the ‘One’.... But the real ‘Prophesized One’ will be hiding some where else... Only very perceptive readers who picks up the clues and patterns of the author can find the real one.... NS is something very similar to that... 

Even if Naruto superficially "liked" her... It was all over the moment he Kissed Sasuke accidentally. And his crush was definitely over the moment he tried to kiss Sakura in Chapter 3. It's one of the fakest bond in Narutoverse where both the parties involved have no interest in each other.... Not in 'that way'...

Here's the thing, Anime knew about SNS bond because they are the one who converts picture into a visual media, they look for all hints thoroughly and know almost everything... It’s because of this very reason, they desperately add lots of extra scenes between Naruto and Sakura. If Naruto goes totally Lovey Dovey about Sakura in a filler... Then it means Naruto is going to be angsty about Sasuke in the Canon episodes.

Just to make Naruto look like an hetero boy, Anime added tons of extra scenes..... In order to reduce Naruto's obvious Gayness.....

In the Manga, he never once claimed, he loved her. This is all Anime's doing.

They kinda just randomly stuck him with Hinata with no real closure or end to the Naruto liking Sakura thing.

What about that time Naruto blatantly rejected her proposal by recalling the moment she said, “I want your acknowledgement, Sasuke-kun”????.... So, Naruto knew that she loved Sasuke from the day Team 7 was formed and that’s why he rejected her outright. What more closure do you expect????  He was masking his feelings for Sasuke and he was lying to himself by flirting with Sakura because wanted to stay in that Closet forever. You should read those attached posts to understand what I am saying.

make SNS canon, 2 middle fingers up to the haters and fall of the face of the earth, just never seen again.

As for that SNS becoming Canon.... This world is not ready for it. Expecting such an ending is very futile, imo.

If Kishimoto was gonna make such a bad ending and continued to ruin his legacy with Boruto he should've left the ending of Naruto open ended.

As for that Boruto part.... I've made peace with it and I am not really bitter anymore. Because if he truly wanted to make so much money, he would've given us a Happy Hetero Ending and write Boruto to be even more interesting which would fetch him a lot of money.

HE ALWAYS INTENDED TO GO FOR AN OPEN ENDING.... 

Especially he knew the Ending while he was drawing the Pain Arc.... And this is 2009 we are talking about.

This is one of the Official Commentary from Kishimoto which he used to mention in every volume of Naruto Manga. This piece is from Volume 47. I mean right after Naruto lands in Konoha (in Pain Arc) to find it has been reduced to a Dry Desert. 

So.... At this point Kishimoto knew whom he was gonna pair Naruto with. And it’s not surprising that he brought Hinata’s confession out of nowhere, in this Arc, only to make her yeeted out in the very same chapter. 

Also, it’s funny that he used the word, “The general script guides are already agreed until the end of the series”..... 

Agreed with whom???? He is the story writer after all.... So, his editors had a say in the script. Even if his Editors did had a say, why couldn’t they make Kishi to develop NH into another MinaKushi instead of making Neji into a Pathetic Love Broker and some disturbing horny reference???? Why couldn’t they stop Kishi to draw Under the Bridge scene in a different way??? Why couldn’t they force Kishi to develop SS in a positive way??? So, Kaguya shit wasn’t planned at this time, eh???? 

Hilariously after this arc, 

Naruto ignored Hinata & her confession (NH is ignored).... 

Sasuke stabbed Karin (SK is crushed here).... 

Naruto blatantly rejected Sakura’s confession... (NS is officially buried here).... 

Sasuke tried to kill Sakura twice as a counter attack (SS became a butt-end of a Joke here).... 

Whereas, Sasuke stopped his rampage and Naruto confessed to Sasuke and also he promised to die with him together (like some star-crossed lovers)....... 

Kishimoto mercilessly destroyed/ignored every other ships after the Pain Arc and kept only the SNS bond intact even though he knew the ending. 

I was like, “Are you guys fucking kidding me??????”

Added to this, Kishimoto always knew the ending he wanted to achieve right after he drew VoTE1. Part 2 of the Manga is all about to reach that ending in a convincing way.  

The following is the interview excerpt from 2006 about the Ending he envisioned.

Again, in 2015, he references the interview he gave back in 2006 and reveals what was the ending he really envisioned....

And his envisioned ending is to make Naruto and Sasuke to reconcile with each other.

Where is Sakura and Hinata in any of this???? 

Now people will pull up the “Kishimoto don’t know how to write Romance” card.... But that’s not true at all.... And I have some Official Receipts here.... LOL...

In Chapter 498, We got this short and cute Love Story...

The following panels are from Chapter 511.... This is almost 80 chapters after Pain Arc. YahiKonan is an unneeded and unnecessary ship, from Narrative POV. It didn’t affect the story in any way. And yet he went onto convey a cute romance in 3 panels.

And he also gave a very good closure to DanTsunade in the War Arc... Just developed a bit about ShikaTema since it was already well-developed....

Don’t you find this weird??? Like, After Pain Arc, he introduced 2 short love stories.... But didn’t give 2 fucks about developing a healthy love story for his own Main Characters????

Instead he found million different ways to mock Hinata and Sakura in an obvious and hilarious ways. I am going to talk only about Hinata mockery here. 

For Example.... 

Mockery No. 1

Hinata is gleefully watching her beloved “Naruto-Kun” getting hugged by another Girl..... Like.... Is this necessary??? When Hinata literally gave her life to protect Naruto (Which she dramatically failed anyway), why make Sakura to hug him??? And make Hinata watch them right under their panel???? Hinata’s smile is so pure and precious.... isn’t it???

This scene is also another way to mock Sakura as well... Which I will explain in some other post...  [[Don’t assume that this is some Romantic NaruS*k* moment...]]

But Hinata was horribly ridiculed here.... 

Mockery No. 2

We already knew Naruto’s impression about Hinata in Part 1. 

Naruto finds her “Weird”....

And In Chapter 504,

Kushina POINTEDLY & SPECIFICALLY asked Naruto to not look for a “Weird One”..... I checked the Japanese Raws and I heard the word pronounced here... Both are same, just in case if you think that it’s a translation error.

Why is Kishi mocking NH again if he knew who Naruto was gonna end up with???? 

So, this Kishimoto don’t know how to write Romance is all some bullshit. If he can develop some unnecessary ship like YahiKonan... He could’ve did a lot better for his Main Characters. 

Now, all that’s left is to say is, “Oh, Kishimoto don’t know how to write Female Characters.... He is a Misogynist”

And I’d suggest you to read Chapter 509, 510, 511 where Konan fought with the main villain of the story and almost killed him using her 600 Billion paper bombs. And then there is Tsunade vs Madara fight.... every Kages were knocked down and she was the only one who desperately tried to save him. And then during chapters 501, 502, 503 we see Kushina’s sacrifice to save Naruto and the Village.

Am not going to say.... All these chapters are some GREATEST FEMINIST LITERATURE or something... But, he did gave some strong, resilient, selfless, have a strong conviction oriented women after the Pain Arc.... Which he intentionally failed to do for Sakura and Hinata.

Anyways... What we can understand so far is that Kishimoto can write good Female Characters, he can write an excellent Romance.... He knew the general script of how it’s going to end and yet he intentionally failed to give any scope for SS or NH or NS or SK..... He never made the boys to reciprocate or to give a damn about any of those girls’ advance while SNS was the only one to remain intact.

So, What was Kishimoto planning anyway???? He can neither put N and S together nor did he attempted to give anything for other ships!!! Where is this Manga going and what was his End Game???

Much later,

Here comes that shitty Last Movie announcement in December 2012.... [Link]

At this time, Naruto Manga was at Chapter 596 or 597 where Kakashi found out the Man behind that Mask was Obito all along. And four months down the line in April 2013, in Chapter 613 or 614, we get Neji’s death. Still no hint of Kaguya Nonsense. Naruto just held Hinata’s hands with no romantic intention from his side whereas Hinata was getting ready to be hornily pounded in front of Neji’s dead body.

All this means, Boruto shit sequel hasn’t been planned. Otherwise Kishimoto could’ve easily introduced Kaguya plotline at this time.

So, no matter how some Movie announcement was happening from SP’s side, Kishi didn’t bother to develop any of the Hetero couples in this series. He was very content with his envisioned ending all along. Meanwhile he gave a good amount of Fanservice to all other ships. Like letting Karin hug Sasuke, Sasuke holding Sakura, Naruto calling Sakura as his Girl Friend, Sakura giving Lip to Lip CPR to Naruto.... But he never consolidated any ships. 

Mockery No. 3

I mean it’s confusing.... He knew who Naruto was gonna end up with.... He made Naruto “hold” her hands at the expense of Neji’s death and right after that, he did this...

This is another mockery from Kishimoto.... Like Why???? The purpose of this scene is to make Naruto look cool before his Dad.... But he could’ve easily pointed out that Hinata was his Girlfriend. 

Mockery No. 4

As you can see Hinata-Sama was desperately trying to save her Naruto-kun but failing so spectacularly.... What a Fun Stuff!!!

Mockery No. 5

This is just 9 chapters before the Manga was about to be over... That is literally 2 Months before this Saga was going to be completed.... This is the perfect place for Naruto to confess the Girl he found to be similar to Kushina.... NaruS*k*s shamelessly claim Sakura as Kushina Personified.... Then why couldn’t Naruto say it out loud??? If not Sakura, why not Kishi made Naruto to say. “I found Hinata”.... Because at this time, That Abominated Last Movie was already made and was waiting for a release. It doesn’t hurt to consolidate NH here, you see.

The Point is.... Why is he mocking his Titular Character’s ship which was decided from the Pain Arc???? Especially after that, he wrote 2 short and cute Love stories that involved another pair. He could’ve easily made NH into another MinaKushi and be done with it. 

Even till the very end, he deliberately didn’t validate any ships even though he had ample time to do it. Ample time is the understatement to be honest.... Pain Arc happened in 2009.... And the Manga ended in 2014. 

That Guy had 5 whole years to do it.... He could’ve added as little as 6 panels to show Naruto and Hinata have some romantic moments in all those 5 years.. And yet he intentionally didn’t. 

So, Yeah....

Kishimoto had an ending in his mind right after drawing VoTE1.... Part 2 was all about how Naruto reconciling with Sasuke.

And in every Arc, Naruto’s desperation and obsession to save Sasuke was very Obvious.

In the Gaara Retrieval Arc, Naruto and Sakura were literally discussing about “How to save Sasuke?”....

In the Sasuke-Sai Arc, Well... You know what happened....

In the Kakuzu-Hidan Arc, Naruto was developing a new jutsu called Sasuke-Shuriken... Ooops... Sorry.... Rasen-Shuriken.... by constantly thinking about him even under the Shooting stars.

In the Itachi pursuit arc... Well... Again, he brought 2 teams to pursue Sasuke and bring him back to the Village....

In the Pain Arc, Naruto may not have thought about Sasuke... But here’s the plot twist... Kishimoto designed that Entire Arc to make Naruto understand Sasuke’s Pain.... He even killed Jiraiya for that exact same reason. And also to make Naruto into a forgivable person so that in the end, Naruto could easily forgive Sasuke. He even confessed this in an Interview.

“I wanted one of the themes of the end to be Naruto forgiving Sasuke.... I wanted to make sure the intervening story (Pain Arc) lead naturally to that in a realistic way to make it plausible.... Because if one minute they’re fighting and then ‘Oh, I forgive you!’ would be weird.”

And this panel consolidates it...

So, an entire arc was dedicated to the Protagonist in order to understand the feelings of his Deuteragonist.... Only for Naruto to confess these feelings to Sasuke in the very next Arc by ignoring a proposal from the girl and rejecting another proposal... Such a dedication for making N understands S.... Why couldn’t he put 0.5% of this dedication to his Titular Character’s ‘Supposed’ Love Interest???

In the Kage Summit Arc, Naruto declared his feelings in the most dramatic way (with romantic undertones) that he will bear the burdens of Sasuke and die with him together.

In the Final Arc, Naruto reconciled with Sasuke.

All of this clearly shows that he planned to end the Manga open ended and let the Last Movie handle the romance part of Naruto so that he could mockingly call the movie as Canon. Because, in this way, he get the ending he always wanted in his own Manga and the Movie team can have their own ending and call it as Canon. Best of both worlds. Just like how SP made many people believe that Naruto loved Sakura by spamming us with filler bullshit and made a fool out of everyone.

But since, SP decided to go for a Sequel, Kishi had to introduce Kaguya crap out of nowhere at around Chapter 646 and he nerfed Madara like a clown and ended up drawing Chapter 700 as a Prologue for Boruto Manga by making everyone marry and have kids.... Otherwise he would’ve made Chapter 700 as to how Naruto became an Hokage.

Just to finish this off,

Kishimoto had no obligation or necessity to write a story about two boys finding Love in each other. HE ABSOLUTELY DON’T NEED TO. And yet he did.

After the Pain Arc, he could’ve easily wrapped his ‘Boy’s Love’ Element and started to go ‘Dude Bruhhhhh’ and focus only on the story. All the while he could’ve made those boys develop a Nice Relationship with those girls. This would have given a Happy Hetero ending in a traditional sense.

But all he did was to intentionally deride Sakura and Hinata at every given chance especially in the War Arc and made those boys to remain indifferent to their romantic Advances.

I don’t know how much he must have fought with his editors to reach his envisioned ending by not giving any content for SS and NH.... Like, Don’t you think, there wasn’t one person from the Manga editing team would have questioned, “Why do you have to kill Neji to bring Naruto and Hinata together and right after that he forgot about her completely??? You could’ve easily made it so much better!!”.... He himself acknowledged that there is a pressure from the Management regarding Boruto series and we don’t know the extent of the pressure he had faced...

He kept his ending in his heart all throughout these years and he gave all out to reach that destination despite facing lot of pressure from the management. I could see his desperate efforts throughout the Manga and it shows.

He must have planned for the Open Ending for as long as he can... Even after the Last Movie announcement.... But because of the sequel, he must have decided to keep all the 699 chapters for himself and let that 700 as a prologue for Next Generation series. Even in the NextGen series, he never stopped mocking NH and SS.

We can either stop at Chapter 699/698 (Phase 1) or we can go ahead and read Boruto Manga to find that ‘There’s no NH or SS in any of this’ and find some faint happiness (Phase 2). It’s up to us.

I was in Phase 1 for very long and moved onto Phase 2 and I am no longer Bitter. Because I got what I wanted from this SNS bond... that is for them to Be Soulmates.

Point me any other Daring Shounen Mangakas who wrote a bond where 2 Boys find Love in each other and almost kept them as the ‘De Facto’ Couple for 99.9% of the Manga.... Show me and I’ll start to get bitter about Kishimoto... Until then, I have no issues and I understand why he did what he did because of his sincere efforts.