#i get jealous on alexs behalf

[yerocdj]

knf is totally real because who remembers when george refused to give alex his number because his only contacts were dream his mother and karl at the time. HE HADNT EVEN GIVEN SAPNAP HIS NUMBER LIKEEEE😭😭😭

[farming-for-affection]

CHAOTIC SHIP! SHANE x ALEX

Well that is a combo I've not seen a lot of. It's an honor to break into the unknown!

CHAOTIC SHIP MEME

SHANE X ALEX

1. Who is more likely to do some shady stuff for the other?

Shane's default state is "doing shady stuff as an act of affection." He is going to be the one "damaging" cases of protein powder to bring to Alex, or buying four tickets to the gridball game, just to scalp two of them to cover the price of the bus fare.

2. Which one playfully calls the other a bitch and which one sarcastically calls the other an asshole?

Shane calls Alex a bitch, and Alex doesn't hate it. Alex occasionally calls Shane an ass, though not as often. Swearing doesn't slip off his tongue the way it does for Shane.

3. Which one is more likely to purposefully act in a way that will make their partner jealous?

It's easy for both of them to feel neglected, and neither take kindly to purposeful jealousy. This is one line that neither of them cross very often.

4. Who is more petty / passive aggressive when they’re upset?

Alex is the passive aggressive one. He'll ignore texts and phone calls, say nothing is wrong, then give the cold shoulder for the rest of the night. It aggravates Shane a lot, who tends to get more quiet when he's upset, which can lead to a full week without any communication.

5. Which one is most likely to get into a fight on the other’s behalf

Shane will start arguments quickly. He gets into shouting matches at the bar when he overhears people insulting Alex's plays. He's not quick to resort to physical violence, though, and it's usually Alex who throws the first punch because Shane was running his mouth.

6. Which one is the most likely to bail the other out of jail?

There are very few times when one is in jail and the other isn't. George is usually the one bailing them out, and they make a pack never to tell Evelyn.

(It's a small town, though. She obviously knows and keeps money aside just in case it happens again.)

7. Who is more likely to initiate mischief of any kind? And does the other stand back and watch or try to stop them?

Alex is more of a "hey, watch this" show offy, kind of guy who somehow ends up bleeding in mundane situations. Shane is often the one to initiate true mischief. His favorite targets are corporations and douchebags. Alex doesn't always know what Shane is getting up to, until there's a loud crash and Shane yells, "run!" But it's hard to run when you're laughing too hard.

8. Which one purposefully annoys the other one to see how long it takes for them to snap?

Alex will be purposefully annoying, especially when Shane is in a grumpy, not-talking mood. Just generally being loud, nudging, bothering. More than half the time, it works, and Shane will eventually try to get his revenge. Some of the time, it backfires with a slamming door.

9. Which ones gets protective because ‘only I’m allowed to bully you!’

They both share this trait. Alex tends to counter any insults to Shane's character by saying all the good things about him outloud, deeply embarrassing Shane.

10. Who is the one to apologize first when things are pushed too far

Alex will typically initiate the apology, and Shane can't stay mad at him for long.

11. Who one ups the other when they proclaim their love? (”no I love you more” “No I love you more.”)

Alex. He loves shouting how much he loves Shane and Shane gets embarrassed. He likes it though, but he'll never admit it.

[away-ward]

NAUURRRRR I SAW THIS, AND KO YOU JUST HAVE TO SUFFER WITH ME 😭😭😭 MichaelRikaKaiBanks bonus i swear im not lying, please be angry with me 😭😭😭🤡. L*nk on twitter/ x:

https://x.com/mytinyfighter/status/ 1702017261370851814?s=61

Just delete the space between / and 7.

I hope there'll never be a willemmy alexaydin istg 😭😭😭 ngl i kinda pd now

Ohhh someone told me about this! Thank you so much for sending it to me. Congratulations, you get a live reaction.

Wait... EmoryWill? D-do they not know Willemmy? Do they not use Willemmy? Willemmy is such a cute name for the pair/ship and honestly much cuter than the other couples'. I'm not being biased, this is fact.

EmoryWill. I'm already mad.

They're what? No. No. Rika is not the most hated. We hate how you interject her in scenes she's not needed. And I've never gotten anything but love for Banks.

Although, I do get a lot of Rika hate in my message box. I never get Banks hate. What are they talking about????

What side of the fandom are they interacting with?

How does everyone know about the steam room? I remember someone coming in on them but it's really gotten around like this that even in their own club, a "young woman" feels bold enough to sass Rika? And Rika has to keep "her chin up" like what? Are you embarrassed suddenly? Can't handle someone sassing you? Have you grown up at all, Rika?

And why is this girl allowed back if she's been given bloody noses before, probably for trying to insult Banks? Clearly, she's not there to learn so maybe they recommend they find a different club, hmm?

And Banks comes in with the logic. This is actually good for me because I've framed Banks differently in my head. So, for a clearer idea of her, I appreciate this.

I can't. I just.

It's not the overwhelming "Rika is perfect and beloved" narrative. Don't get it wrong. It's the way in contradicts the way I've framed them in my head (which, again, we've established is way off anyway so I don't know why I'm so annoyed). But I want them to all be all the same level. Why is it that Em and Alex and Will and Winter all love Rika, but Banks doesn't feel that same love from them?

In short, this is not the "chosen family" vibe I wanted. And now I'm mad. And sad. I'm Smad.

Let's see what else is in this box of fun, shall we?

Of course it was! He didn't practice abstinence before he met you. He had plenty of practice that had nothing to do with Rika.

I don't like her jealousy. Where's my logical Banks? *checks under a rock*

"It's been sitting between us." No, Banks. It's been sitting on you. No one else cares.

Does this mean Emory's safe??? I don't have to worry about random scenes popping up to ruin my ideas of her?

oh wait. you're right. Alex and Aydin are still waiting in the wings for their chance to steal the spotlight.

And on one hand, I get where Rika is coming from regarding Kai. On the other hand her saying things like "I don't think about Kai" and "Don't bring him up again" feels rude. Like dude, what he'd do to you? As far as I know, he's always been nice to you. You should think about him. I mean, respect that he has a wife and don't objectify him. But like... have nice thoughts about the guy.

I don't have to have nice thoughts about him. But I'm mad on Em's behalf.

I really wish this was the end of it. I wish it ended here with Banks agreeing but letting know Rika she doesn't mind and then they leave as friends with a deeper understanding of each other. Yay.

Knowing Michael (which, again... I don't), he probably got a little kick when talking to Kai, knowing that Rika wanted Banks more than him. He also probably kept it a secret because it fixed the relationship between him and Kai. No reason to be jealous of his best friend when his wife doesn't even want him.

She's what...? What kind of family is this????? Ten years and she's never had a reason to call Michael?

Michael starts talking and I immediately retch. That's horrible.

Well... that was something. I kind of feel bad for Kai. Is it just me, or does the line "trying to sort out his feelings" seem like he's not all that into it? I mean, of course he is because PD created him to be, but like... doesn't sound like someone who was positive that what's happening is what he wants.

Anyway. Thanks, I think. I don't know why I'm so annoyed. I knew how this was going to go and yet...

I object to everything here. Just for the record.

[mars-mystic]

Blackout Chapter 4- Alternate Universe cutscene

(Wrote this for chapter 4, but ultimately it didn’t quite fit. Would have to exist in a universe without Galex history)

“George asked me if we’re fucking,” Alex said over the breakfast table.

It had become a routine, the two of them sitting down for a late breakfast after George’s breakfast and morning meds. They’d tried to alternate between cooking duties and George duties, until Lance realized that George was far less likely to call him an untalented bitch if they weren’t in the same room. So then it became Lance does the cooking and Alex does George duties.

Lance had made a nice ham and cheese omelette today, which he promptly choked on. “He said what?” he asked, gasping for breath while Alex laughed at him.

“I think he’s jealous.”

“Jealous? Of what?”

“Of you.”

“Me? Why? He already has me.”

“He doesn’t know that,” Alex pointed out. “Think about it. You’ve got it all. The formula one seat, the successful career, the hot blonde.”

“And you’re the hot blonde here?” Lance asked, eyebrow raised as he took another bite (carefully) of his omelette. It had turned out surprisingly well and he wasn’t going to let it go to waste just because George was being delusional.

“Of course,” Alex grinned. Lance rolled his eyes at him. “Hey, I’m a catch!”

“You’ve already been caught, Albono,” Lance laughed at him. “What would your wife say if she caught you talking like that?”

“Lily wouldn’t mind. Me and Georgie have always been special like that.”

“You’d better not be getting ‘special’ with my boyfriend, Albon,” Lance groaned. “And on his behalf, you’re not getting ‘special’ with me either. Despite popular belief, I do prefer my relationships exclusive.”

“Are you still on about that Alonso thing? That was years ago man!” Alex laughed at him.

Lance sighed. “I don’t know what he and Flavio get up to, but I promise you I was not involved.”

Alex laughed out loud at that. “I believe you, but only because you’d be dead in a ditch right now if George thought you’d slept with those two.”

Alex mimed slitting Lance’s throat with a finger. Digging a grave. Burying Lance in said grave. High-fiving George over Lance’s grave.

“Thanks Alex, have I ever told you you’re insufferable?” Lance grinned. He put on his best politely inquisitive face. “So what do you think? Are we fucking?”

Alex sighed, long and deep as he leaned back in his chair. “This is so fucked, mate.”

“I know,” Lance said. He’d watched George his whole life. Seen the way he would stare at Alex like he was his dream come true. Seen his eyes light up whenever Alex was around.

“I already broke his heart once, you know,” Alex said, staring blankly at the wall above Lance’s head. He laughed weakly. “I thought that would be enough.”

[carlando554]

post the hockey au scene! would love to read ❤️

ahhh okay!! Here it is!!!

“He wasn’t always like this, you know,” Lando startled a bit at Lewis’ words.

“Er–who are we talking about?” 

“Carlos. He wasn’t always this outgoing with the team. I don’t know what you did but since you got here he’s really come out of his shell.” 

“Really?” Lando hadn’t known that. He’d assumed Carlos had always been like this. 

“Really. I mean, he was always friendly, but now he’s fun. I think we’d all kind of accepted that he was just a bit more reserved, but seeing him now it’s obvious that there was just something holding him back, and whatever it was seems to have disappeared with you.” 

Lando fought against the blush that threatened to take over his entire face. “How d’you know it was me that made the difference though? Maybe it was just a new-season-resolution or something.” 

“Nah,” Lewis dismissed immediately, “he’s practically glued to your side 24/7–and don’t try to say it’s a center-winger thing, we both know you and I aren’t nearly as close. I’ve actually been wanting to have this conversation with you for weeks but it was near impossible to get you alone. It’s obvious your friendship has had a massive impact on him. I guess I just wanted to say thank you on behalf of the team. It’s nice to see him happy like this.” Lando’s heart was doing somersaults in his chest. 

Was Lewis right? Was their friendship as important to Carlos as it was to Lando? Well, probably not seeing as Lando was basically in love with Carlos and Carlos was still straight. But the idea that Lando had made such a profound change in Carlos that the rest of the team had noticed it? Lando liked it a lot. Probably too much. 

“No need to thank me mate, I don’t know how but that idiot’s become one of my best friends. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.” Lando froze for a second, worried he might have given himself away, but Lewis just smiled at him before raising his beer for Lando to clink his own against in a toast. 

“You’re a good man, Norris, keep it up and you might take my role as captain one day.” 

Lando laughed and playfully swatted at Lewis. “Hey! No retirement talk! Not at your own birthday party!” 

“You rookies and your determination to ignore the passage of time. I’m 38 this year, whether I like it or not, retirement is on my horizon. Can you blame me for wanting to make sure my team will be in good hands?” Lando was alarmed to realize that he was getting emotional. He’d only been Lewis’ teammate for about four months, but he’d already come to care greatly for the man. It was obvious why he was the team captain for seven years running. 

“Just give us some warning when the time comes, alright? Don’t pull a Seb on us.” 

Lewis laughed at his words but it sounded somewhat melancholy. “Don’t worry about that, I’m not nearly as secretive as he is. I mean, I’m a few years away from that decision yet and I’m already talking to you about it. So. Yeah, you’ll know.” Lewis smiled at Lando and Lando smiled back.

“Alright old man, stop moping around the cripple’s corner and go have fun. It’s your party.” Lando laughed as he shoved Lewis away from the couch. 

He wasn’t alone for long before someone came to join him.

“Was Lewis taking advantage of your injury to corner you?” Carlos asked, a soft smile on his face as he took a seat next to Lando, careful not to jostle his raised ankle. Lando was reminded of what Lewis said about him and Carlos and his smile widened a bit. 

“Why? You jealous that I'm hanging out with someone other than you?” Lando teased, nudging Carlos with his elbow.

“Maybe I am,” Carlos said, an exaggerated pout on his face. Lando just snorted in response. 

“Well you shouldn’t be. I think I spend more time with you than I do George and Alex. And I live with them.” Carlos’ expression turned sheepish.

“I do not mean to keep you away from your friends–” Lando cut his ridiculousness off right there.

“Oh please Carlos, you know that’s not what I meant.” He raised his eyebrows, fixing Carlos with a stern look. “If I wanted to be spending more time with my other friends I would be. Okay? You’re not keeping me away from anyone. I don’t want to hear such absurdity again.” Carlos was beaming at him now and Lando had to look away because the sight sent a bolt of pain through his chest. “Alright, enough with the sappy shit,” he huffed, “you’re as bad as Cap!” 

“Ay!” Carlos laughed, bringing his hand to his chest in mock offense, “you wound me cabrón, I’m nowhere near as sappy as Cap!”

“You’re right, you’re worse,” Lando replied, and then immediately squealed as he was tickled in retaliation. “Okay! Okay! I take it back! Mercy!” 

“Woah, Chili! Attacking the injured man, that’s low dude,” Lance said, wandering into the room. 

“Yes but he deserved it, so it is okay.” 

“Ha! That I can believe,” Lance replied, chuckling and shaking his head.

“Aw c’mon!” Lando protested, but he was laughing along too.

[daysofourlivesrecaps]

Tuesday, 30 May 2023

Some days (or some Days, I guess?) they move us from one set of plots to another, entirely unrelated set of plots that do not overlap any of the others in the slightest and we end up with a bit of whiplash. And this is exactly what happened today.

Xander checks in with Gwen regarding the newspaper that they co-own and co-manage. And look, I adore both of these very British, very pretty people. But I have an exceptionally hard time believing that they've managed to keep *an actual print newspaper* in business this long between the two of them.

Xander has heard that Gwen let the ad sales manager go, and suggests Chloe (with her background in opera singing and... whatever the hell she did at that fashion company) for the job. Gwen pushes back, suggesting that it would be unethical to hire Xander's current girlfriend. But Xander denies that anything is going on and Gwen concedes, figuring that she must have read that in next week's Soap Opera Digest or something.

Chloe is visited by Brady, who offers her that same nebulous job back at the fashion company. The company is not called Basic Bitch (Amanda: BITCH!) but is in fact called Basic Black. Because his name is Brady Black. Also I'm pretty sure their logo looks exactly like that of the rival soap, The Brave and the Bold The Bold and the Beautiful, but I have been unable to find evidence to support this.

Chloe says "nah, I shouldn't come to work for my ex-boyfriend. That would be unethical. Besides, Xander offered me a job that I'm definitely qualified for!"

Then Xander returns home and he and Brady glare at each other for a few minutes.

Over at the Kirakases...

We know, Maggie. RESTING IN PEACE. For christ's sake, poor John Aniston has been gone since November. When the hell are you people going to stop playing this game?

Justin, having heard that Alex lost his job when he blew that big deal, has come to plead with Maggie to reconsider. Because nothing says "I am a powerful entity in the business world" quite like having one of your parents grovel for forgiveness on your behalf.

In Chicago, Maggie's daughter Sarah is still inexplicably hanging out with Rex, the living embodiment of Crayola's Atomic Tangerine crayon. They're visited by Bonnie (a sort of working-class Anna) who immediately figures out that Sarah's pregnant (mostly because she's hiding it so very badly) and that the baby is actually Xander's.

Xander put on a clown mask and kidnapped Bonnie and Susan Banks (the woman, not our cat) in the events that ultimately led to Susan (the human)'s death, but Bonnie has somehow forgiven him for this and joined the chorus of people insisting that Sarah should just give him another chance.

And look, I think they were a great match. They were both quite sexy and extremely funny together. I bought their connection and I enjoyed seeing them together. But people keep gaslighting Sarah into thinking Xander didn't do exactly the awful things she dumped his Scottish ass for. And I wish they'd stop.

Back in Salem, Alex is stil moping about losing his job, so he's hanging out with Stephanie. Then Chad returns from Greece and gives Alex the same jealous bullshit that happened when their positions were reversed. It's a good day for dudes pumping up their chests at other dudes, I guess. But not in the sexy way, like you want.

Alex leaves them to their uncomfortable couch sex and takes off. In the square, he runs into Gwen and asks if she still has that ad sales job open. "You, a man I was recently fucking, would be perfect for this job and not at all an unethical choice! Unfortunately, the position is taken."

Then she pretty much begs him to get back in bed with her with her eyes (seriously, look at that) and also with her actual words, but he stands his ground on the whole "working on myself and the way I treat women" thing. Which is honorable and probably the right thing to do, but also I feel exceptionally bad for Gwen. Won't someone think of poor, horny Gwen?

Then Alex runs into Brady, who realizes neither of them really have a lot to do right now so he offers Alex the job that he wanted to give to Chloe. And Alex accepts, realizing that he needs to do something interesting soon or he'll end up being replaced by that exceptionally boring character that this same performer also plays. (Because look, he's a fine actor but he's not good enough to make me believe he's two different people who look and sound nearly identical and just dress a little differently.)

Then he returns home to his dad, his Auntie Maggie and his ABSOLUTELY FOR SURE STILL ALIVE UNCLE VICTOR, where he's offered his old job back. But he declines, because he's gotten a much better (worse) offer from Brady.

And honestly, as "dudes in therapy learning a little humility" arcs go, this was a pretty big moment for Alex! I'm proud of the beautiful idiot!

[sublimecatgalaxy]

How about a jealous Reader and Daryl?? 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

Yaaas!

I think that Daryl thinks that I can't see him.

He's crouched over his motorcycle, watching Rick and I fumble under the bed of the smoking car, our foreheads lined with tired wrinkles and arms dripping with sweat from the hot sun. Daryl has always been protective of me, keeping a watchful eye out for any walkers or anyone who would cause deep harm to me.

But I've never seen him look at Rick in a way similar to that he looks at someone who's out to hurt me.

It's not like he offered to help me with my broken down car. He just rolled up on his bike and watched me as I fiddled around, no clue on what actually do to without making it worse. That's when Rick stepped in, a soft smile on his lips and his hands immediately batting mine away to get into the guts of the truck.

Immediately Daryl was up in arms in a very quiet manner, his eyes low to the ground, occasionally lifting to glare at the back of his best friends head before looking to me. His eyes are soft as they look over my expression, anxiously biting at his lip as he fiddles with the zipper of his jacket.

By the time we decide to ditch the car, Daryl is anxiously waiting for me to hop on the back of his bike. But before I can approach him and ask why he's been so grumpy, Rick steps in front of me, a small smile on his lips.

"You wanna drive with Carl and I? He likes your jokes more than mine." Rick mutters sheepishly, reaching up to rub the back of his neck. Before I can open my mouth to speak, Daryl clears his throat and speaks up on my behalf.

"She's comin' with me." Rick doesn't say anything else, just nods at me slowly with a small smile, stepping past me and towards his car. I send Carl a small wave before stepping up to Daryl, setting my hands on my hips as he looks at me. "What?"

Rolling my eyes, I slide onto the back of the motorcycle, wrapping my arms firmly around Daryl's waist. I set my chin against his shoulder as he turns to look back at me, eyes gleaming with mischief. His eyes flicker down to my lips briefly, cheeks tinted red and I snort, pinching his side.

"You're jealous."

"Not jealous." He quickly replies, revving the motorcycle and the rest of the cars begin to drive off. He continues to shake his head and my arms tighten around his waist, my chest completely pressed against his back as I feel his heart pound.

"Mhm, keep tellin' yourself." Whispering in his ear, he shivers, his whole body stiff against mine. "At the end of the day, I'm on your bike, with you. Not Rick." A moment passes, his head bobbing in simple realization that I'm right. I'm with him, close to him, not anyone else and because I want to be here.

"Keep it that way."

"Wouldn't want it any other way."

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- Taglist: @bubblebuttwade @rafelover2405 @leslienjazzy @sorceresss @grxnde-dwt @alex–awesome–22 @bunnietoof @niyamar1e @serialghost @plantlungs @geniusohn @akaliltimmytim @lilaalouuxx @xshariex @elliotsbeigeguitar @elle4404 @lelieja @srhxpci @joselyn001 @taysirene @spinkspanther @thedivineuphoria @peter-maximoffs @tsukishimawhore @poohkie90 @szlaco @distantsighs @nstyles4299 @wolflover384 @givemefoodandlovesstuff @vane28282 @yeswhatever33 @amirrahfranson @vvaalleennttiinna @f-mu @yaspillz @jeyramarie @skylievin@abbybarnes17 @jointherebellion215 @visiondaddy @steezysimfinds @its-ya-gay-boi-luigi

@crunchytoenailsyum@glizzymcguirex @beth123lg @melovesmut @rafecameronswhore @ariianelle @write-from-the-heart @vampviolets@haylee-e@popehaywardssecretgf @honee-chai-tea @lokiandbuckywife @smoke-and-fire @officiallyunofficialperson@heyaitsklaudia@rosepetalsparks @bluetreecloud20 @scenesofobx @double-shot-of-tequila @1dluver13xx @colbysbrocks @iamasimpingh0e @smoke-and-fire386 @loveshineslikethesky @id-3-kbro @diorsitgirl @errorfound101-allideasburnedout @neverwillknowme18 @ellyskey @taylors-folk @loversjoy @myaloveee @thyris-is @lagataprrr @aaaaslaaaan @minjix @luvrosee @storytellingwitht

[somanysoundtracks]

That moment you realize you're not playing a heavily modified version of giant senet in "Tomb Raider: The Last Revelation" (1999), because you're actually playing a modified version of the game of twenty/Twenty Squares

(Image from "The Game of Twenty Squares" from cyningstan.com http://www.cyningstan.com/game/1061/the-game-of-twenty-squares)

Also, before we start off, credit to "Ancient Egyptians at Play: Board Games Across Borders" (2016) by Walter Crist, Anne-Elizabeth Dunn-Vaturi, and Alex do Voogt for more background on the various ancient board games. I am not an archaeologist or historian, but these folks are (also they go way more into detail on the individual games, naming arguments, rules, geographical movements, etc., than I will because this post is long enough).

(You can purchase an ebook copy on Books (iOS) and Kobo, and a physical in most places books are sold; I get nothing from the sale, it’s just a very interesting book)

So I haven’t found anyone who’s written or vlogged about this in ~23 years of this video game’s existence, so I guess it’s down to me, having too much free time and an interest in going down a research rabbit hole.

I’ve wanted to be an Egyptologist since I was like 7, so learning senet - an ancient Egyptian board game - was something I was always interested in doing, particularly given how often senet pops up if you do any basic research into the lives of ancient Egyptians or their mythology.

(A senet/znt board from Abydos ca. 1550-1295 B.C.E. (the other side appears to have had the game of twenty on it) https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/544775)

(Image credit: Wikihow)

According to some versions of the myth, Ra, the Egyptian god of the sun, was either jealous of Nut’s (goddess of the sky) love of Geb (god of the Earth), or knew of a prophecy whereby her offspring would unseat Ra from the throne, and cursed her to be unable to give birth for the whole year. On Nut’s behalf, Thoth, the god of wisdom, played senet against Khonsu, god of the moon, for enough moonlight to add five extra unofficial days to the year (bringing it to 365 days), wherein Nut could give birth.

The giant game of “Senet” in TR4′s Tomb of Semerkhet always fascinated me, because not only was it apparently “senet” in some form, but it also just looked neat (for the time, TR4′s graphics looked really cool). By the time I was able to play it myself, though, I’d come to accept that it wasn’t actually senet, because the configuration was wrong (most senet games have 30 cells in 3 lanes of 10, whereas “Senet” in TR4 has 20 cells and is arranged like a lollipop or hammer).

Fast forward to recently when I finally looked into getting a senet board to play with my family, and I discovered another ancient Egyptian board game called Mehen, supposedly based on the Egyptian snake god of the same name, who was known to wrap his coils around Ra for protection every night on the sun boat as Ra journeyed across the sky.

(Image credit: a Mehen board from Abydos, Egypt, ca 3000 BCE, the Neues Museum)

During that search, I randomly came across boards for the TR4 game I thought the TR4 devs made up! But rather than being a recreation of a fictional board game, as a number of gaming enthusiasts are apt to do, this one is real. It was called Aseb, which is a name you come across for the game of twenty in a number of places, and is a little more accepted than the alternate but also relatively popular name, Tjau. Most of the academics I’ve seen don’t use either “Aseb” or “Tjau”, though. They call it the game of twenty or Twenty Squares.

(A Twenty Squares board from Thebes, Egypt. ca. 1635–1458 B.C.E https://www.metmuseum.org/exhibitions/listings/2014/assyria-to-iberia/blog/posts/twenty-squares)

So what happened here? TR4 actually calls it “Senet”, so clearly the naming choice was intentional on some level. Here's a picture of the in-game item in the Tomb of Semerkhet level to learn the rules for the board game (you can see a preview of the board itself on the bottom right) (also I believe this is from the console version):

The name of the item in your inventory telling you what the game you're going to be playing is called:

(Screencap from “Tomb Raider 4 - Tomb of Semerkhet Walkthrough” by Roli's Tomb Raider Channel: https://youtu.be/RhAbD7EsC8A?t=512)

After the game of twenty was introduced to Egypt, it was often added to the back of senet game boards (two games in one). I’ve reviewed interviews from before and after TR4 was released, various retrospectives and documentaries, and found nothing on who made this level or why the game was misnamed, assuming anyone involved even knew it was misnamed. I imagine the TR4 devs found one or more of these double-sided boards during game development: a labeled senet board with the game of twenty on the back, and they then assumed it was the same game in two variants. My assumption is that someone wanted senet because it’s a relatively well-known cultural artifact from Egypt that people would at least have name recognition for, but the game of twenty was picked instead of senet because it’s shorter and less complicated. Plus, senet is considered to be a metaphorical journey through the Egyptian afterlife, which is suitable for a tomb (and a game involving bringing a dead god back to life), and many of the surviving boards we have were found in tombs.

Maybe the devs even read some article somewhere that misattributed it. Surviving board games have been misattributed over the years and anything is possible. Also, this was 1998 and it's easier to download an epub of "Board Games Across Borders" in 2022 than whatever they did.

Notably the team did research at the British Museum (https://youtu.be/aTL88Z4db9k?t=4560), which has at least one senet board on display. It also has a game of twenty board, which was possibly in South Carolina or being transported when the team was researching (https://www.britishmuseum.org/collection/object/Y_EA24424)

The team also bought books for research, though I'm not sure what, other than some of the works of John-Yves Empereur (https://youtu.be/aTL88Z4db9k?t=6414). There was also apparently a US team (Core Design was British), but I'm not sure where they went for research.

I've seen a few websites call the game of twenty in TR4 a "variant" of senet (likely because it's called "Senet" in TR4, but doesn't look like senet). It's not. Senet is Egyptian (though the origin is murky pre-First Dynasty). The game of twenty possibly came from the Indus Valley and shows up in Egyptian artifacts around the 17th Dynasty. The game of twenty is supposedly a variation of the Royal Game of Ur (from Sumer). The Royal Game of Ur was played all around the region.

(https://www.britishmuseum.org/collection/object/W_1928-1009-378)

For the game of twenty, four of the cells on the right were folded back into a longer tail. I haven’t found any historian or archaeologist who says that senet or the game of twenty was involved in the other’s creation, outside them both appearing on the same game boards, back to back. For all intents and purposes, senet was present in Egypt for some time before the game of twenty arrived, and then both games were popular there simultaneously.

I can’t find any fansite, forum, speedrunner, or playthrough that references the fact that the giant board game in TR4 isn’t actually senet. Even Stella’s Walkthroughs references it as a variant of senet, and links to Senet’s wikipedia page, which does actually have a game of twenty board on it (though they call it Tjau), and the Met’s page on senet, which also references the game of twenty. Tomb Raider Horizons mentions the game and shows screencaps, but talks about senet, not the game of twenty. And all the fanwikis I’ve found refer to it as senet, not the game of twenty or any of its other name variants.

For all intents and purposes, I guess no one noticed this in 23+ years, or was invested enough to go down a rabbit hole for it. But it’s neat to learn it was real.

Unrelatedly, there appears to be a sort of senet board in "Tomb Raider" (1996). There are ~15 more cells than most senet games and 2 extra lanes, but it's interesting that the team seems to have sort of done it right just a couple years beforehand.

(Screenshot from "Was it Good? - Tomb Raider 1" by Josh Strife Plays: https://youtu.be/dwzIu4zFJVI)

It's possible the TR1 game is forty-two and pool, which is supposed to be similar to senet, and has 42 holes, though the number of rows is wrong, and I don't have a picture of the board for comparison.

It's also possible this is some version of "Hounds and Jackals", which often has 58 holes (notably the one above has 45 cells), but the TR1 board looks more like senet's does and the pieces are missing, so who knows? (https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/543867)

Misnaming aside, shout out to this translation of the casting sticks in a video game not built to play board games and using 1998-9 tech.

(Screencap from “Tomb Raider: The Last Revelation - 13b - Winning at Senet” by ladycroft214: https://youtu.be/1JV2oIXmVMg)

You can also play versions of all these games, online or physically. We don’t know the rules for all of them, and rules changed over the centuries anyway, but many people have come up with their own rules based on what we know, so there are versions online, and plenty of board game makers who have designed them for you to purchase, or even draw yourself on paper, like the ancients used to graffiti on roads and walls.

[brookecuzyes]

three years of you. — tear myself apart

Damiano David x GN!Musician!Reader

Main Masterlist — 3yrs Masterlist

Summary: it’s only been a couple of days, which were full of tears and regret. however, that regret wasn’t on their part until a simple comment was made. (Part 3 of a series)

Word Count: ≈3.4k

Warnings: cursing, alcohol intake, angst (Anyone drinking alcohol in this chapter is of the legal drinking age in the United States, which is 21.)

A/N: thank y’all for reading! this has already gained a lot of readers and so i am happy about that. love you guys sm 💕 songs included in this fic are not mine. any characters mentioned are not mine, and belong to their respected owners. and ofc, i don’t own the celebrities either. i do check comments/reblogs, so please be respectful!!

———————————————————————-

You’ve got this, you can do it.

You tried consoling yourself. Normally, he would be here to help calm you down— or at least call if he could physically be there. He’d be there if you were about to have a panic attack, he’d be there to make sure that you were OK.

But you aren’t.

An entire audience full of strangers who listened to the songs, who listened to your heartbreak. Now, they get to watch your heart break live.

He wouldn’t— no, couldn’t— be there to comfort you. He couldn’t be there to tell you that everything will be fine. He fucked up, he’s the one who messed up that relationship…

“…then why did you show up?”

——

Glasses clinked. Chatter was taking place all around. Honestly, it was a little overwhelming.

You sat down at the booth with the whole band. Saturday had rolled around, which you hadn’t noticed since you were lost in an almost depressive state where time was non-existent. However, the karaoke bar definitely woke you up.

“Alright, guys,” Luke, the lead guitarist, said, holding a couple of drinks in his hands. “Tonight is the night! The tradition kicks in once again, and Monday we start recording. Let’s celebrate and relax.” Julie, the lead singer and the girlfriend of Luke, followed behind him, setting more drinks down on the table. Flynn, the unofficial manager of the band, let out a loud, “woo!”, making everyone laugh. All of you grabbed a glass and clinked them together, all taking a sip at the same time. Your face crunched when you processed the drink.

“Jesus, Luke, what is this?” you questioned.

“Alcohol,” he said blatantly.

“Yeah, no shit,” you shot back, shaking off the effects.

“I just said that we’re relaxing— that’s exactly what alcohol does!”

“Or maybe you're just an alcoholic?” Alex joked, taking a sip of his drink.

“I don’t drink that much.” Luke defended.

“That’s what an alcoholic would say.” The whole band started laughing at the ongoing banter. It isn’t often when Alex made witty remarks like that, and everyone always enjoyed it when he did.

On another note, you felt as if you absolutely needed this drink. Given what’s been going on this last week, you felt like you deserved it. Though, you knew you’d regret this tomorrow. You knew Alex was keeping an eye out for you. The rest of the band didn’t know yet, they just knew that something happened, which is why you left Italy so early. They were all confused, but didn’t ask upon it when Alex glared daggers at them when they tried. So, thankfully, they did back off. But, it doesn’t mean that they weren’t concerned.

You had been talking, making it seem as if everything was fine, but Alex’s heart broke when he picked up on it. However, with the alcohol about to course through your veins, it would be harder from him to be able to pick up on whether you were drunk or going through it. Regardless, he was going to make sure that you were having fun and not thinking about your ex.

“Hey,” Flynn said, “why don’t we start the karaoke? I think we all have enough alcohol in our systems to do this.”

“I vote for Alex to go first!” You said, raising your hand. “Do Micheal Bublé.”

“Woah, hold up, I never even said-“

“It doesn’t matter. What I say goes. Now go.” He sighed, laughing as he stood up from the booth. He went over to the guy and told him what song he wanted to do. They got everything set up, and Alex got on stage.

“Let’s go, Alex!” You cheered on, making him smile and blush just a bit— though that wasn’t entirely visible from where you guys decided to sit.

The song started playing, and Alex started singing. It took you a few seconds to recognize the song but you figured it out.

“Oh, he’s singing Feeling Good. I love that song,” you whispered to Reginald, the bassist, who was sitting next to you. He looked to you over his shoulder, smiling. He hadn’t seen you so “out there” since you got back. It was nice to see you getting back to normal. Though, he didn’t actually know why you weren’t normal to begin with.

And I’m feeling… good.

You cheered Alex on again, dancing along to the beat with the whole band. Alex didn’t sing much, but when he did you cherished those moments. That’s why he songs Now or Never and Stand Tall on the band’s very first album are your favorite.

“God, I love his voice,” Reggie said, as if he read your mind.

“Yeah, and look at him,” you pointed out the way his body is moving with the music. The way he was just lost in a musical haze. It was enchanting. “That’s what his anxiety covers up.”

Alex soon finished, hopping off of the stage with an embarrassed smile on his face.

“Oh, don’t be embarrassed, babe,” you said, noticing his expression. “That was the best performance tonight by far. Not even Julie could compare to how amazing that was.”

“Thanks, Y/N,” she said, drawing out the ‘thanks’ in a sarcastic way. You raised your glass to her.

“Anytime, Jules,” you replied, raising your eyebrow and taking a sip. She laughed, letting the comment you made slip— for now at least.

“Hey, I have an idea!” Flynn exclaimed. “How about we take a couple photos and post them to our accounts? Y’know, to celebrate this very special moment.” Everyone collectively agreed. Pictures were taken left and right— and others were taken throughout the night, too— and each person had a different photo that they were each going to post. You had decided that you were going to post yours now, not wanting to forget later on tonight or tomorrow.

You captioned it:

Just continuing a small tradition tonight with music and alcohol. maybe if he lets me, i’ll post Alex singing Feeling Good 😏🤍

It was perfect and you posted it, after letting everyone see it to make sure it was OK. Within minutes people already saw it and were liking and commenting. You made sure to turn your phone off before it started going crazy. Julie and Luke decided to go up and do a duet with each other. They choose Little Do You Know. Their voices were beautiful singing the song. They mashed just so perfectly. You recorded them, knowing that you would 100% show them this at their wedding. (They aren’t engaged, but it’s bound to happen sooner or later.)

You weren’t paying attention to the notifications spamming the top of your screen, though you did look back once to see if the camera was aligned with their bodies. That’s when you saw a specific notification. One thing that you absolutely forgot when you posted that photo was that Måneskin could still see your posts. The only reason you remembered was because Victoria responded to your post.

Ahhh you look amazing!!!😘

The second you saw it, you put your head in your hands, mentally slapping yourself. If Victoria saw it, then the rest of the band is going to see, meaning Damiano would see it. Fuck, you thought to yourself.

“Hey, Y/N, are you alright?” Alex asked, placing a hand on your arm. You looked up at him showing him the comment. “I don’t understand.”

“Victoria commented. Meaning Damiano’s probably gonna see it.”

“Not if he’s blocked.”

“I didn’t block him, we’re still mutuals.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know, Alex. Maybe I just haven’t gotten to it yet.” You realized the angered tone in your voice, not meaning to be rude to Alex. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap.”

“No, it’s okay. Hey, maybe if he does end up seeing it, he’ll just be jealous. Damiano will see everything he’s missing out on.”

“What is Damiano missing out on?” Julie asked, sitting back down with Luke.

“Oh, it’s nothing-“ Alex started, but you cut him off.

“I left Italy because Damiano was talking to another girl. It caused too many problems, so I left.” Everyone went silent. Everyone’s eyes softened at you, unsure of what to say.

“Y/N…”

“It’s fine. I’m here now. It doesn’t matter.” Silence fell once again, especially on Alex’s behalf. He knew you weren’t fine, he knew it mattered— whether you said it or not. “Sorry if I kinda killed tonight’s vibe.”

“N-No, you’re fine,” Reggie said. “You did nothing wrong.”

“Yeah, you didn’t ruin anything. I am glad that you told us, though. We’ve been worried.” Luke said, putting his arms on the table and leaning forward just a bit. You felt your phone vibrate but didn’t think anything of it— probably just another person on Instagram.

“Sorry that I made you guys worry. I just wasn’t sure how to bring it up. It’s just been a hard couple of days. This shit isn’t easy,” you explained, mumbling the last part. Everyone stayed silent, none wanting to make something worse.

“Luke, why don’t you and the guys go grab some food?” Julie suggested, placing a hand on Luke’s back, turning her attention back to you.

“Oh, yeah. Guys, let’s go,” Luke said, getting the hint. The boys got up and left, each giving you a sympathetic look. The girls, on the other hand, all stayed behind.

“Alright, listen up,” Flynn started. “Tonight is not the night to mope around. You can do that tomorrow when you’re hungover.”

“Right now,” Julie jumped in, “you’re gonna forget about that asshole, get your ass out there, and sing your heart out, dammit!” Your eyes widened at the girls’ sternness. A smile started creeping from your lips, Julie and Flynn following behind you. Soon enough, the three of you started laughing your asses off.

“Ok, ok, I’m convinced. I’ll have fun tonight. Thanks,” you said, trying to shake off the laughter so you can speak. You grabbed your drink, taking a sip of it. It was the same drink Luke got you earlier. Damn it, Luke. You shook your head to shake off the kick the drink had. Flynn chuckled at your antics, taking a sip of her, not as strong, drink. The guys soon came back with some snack-type items in their hands.

“Are we all good now?” Alex asked, setting down the plate on the table and looking your way.

“Yep, we’re all good now,” Julie answered, taking a sip of her drink. You chuckle at her, reaching for some of the food on the table. “But, Y/N’s about to sing for us.”

“Woah, wait, now?”

“What did I say? You’re gonna sing your heart out.”

You groaned, slumping back in your set in a joking— yet, not entirely joking— way. “Julie, I didn’t realize that you meant right now.”

“Ok, so? Get up there, Y/N! C’mon it’ll be fun.” You contemplated. I should go, you thought, it could be fun.

“Fine, I’ll go,” you announced, getting up from your seat. Reggie and Flynn got up from theirs so you could get out. When you got up, you turned to Reginald.

“C’mon, you’re doing this with me,” you said, grabbing his arm and dragging him over to the guy supervising the karaoke.

“I didn’t really wanna sing right now. Nerves, y’know?” Reggie explained.

“So? Reggie, I get that nerves are real, but there’s no way in hell I’m doing this alone.” You opened up a book full of songs, and was going through the selection.

“Why couldn’t you just get someone else?”

“Because I think our voices clash very well together.” You turned your head to him and gave him a smile. He shyly smiled back. You looked back at the book and held it up to Reggie. “What about this one?” you asked, pointing to a song. Reggie read it and smiled.

“Yeah, let’s do it,” he said, grabbing the pen and marking off the song and writing your names. You stood back, waiting for him to finish. When he did, he turned around.

“Alright, I’ve got us down. Wanna head up?” He asked, holding his hand out with a playful smile.

“Let’s do it,” you said, grabbing a hold of his hand, him taking you up the stairs and into the stage.

When you walked up, you saw the screen in front of you turn on, switching to the lyrics of the song. The lights were bright, but it wasn’t anything you weren’t used to. You saw some people stare at you, but it was mainly the rest of the band. Reginald walked to the microphone set up on the far left, you took the other. The song started playing, immediately relaxing you. Maybe this isn’t as bad as I thought. The song you chose was a favorite of you and Reggie— Meet Me At Our Spot. Of course, the band loved it too, but they got bored with it after a while since you two were always blasting it wherever you went. You actually had some inspiration from this song and wrote a little tune, but you had no lyrics at the moment.

When I wake up

I cant even stay up

I slept through the day, fuck

I’m not getting younger

——

“Victoria, you don’t understand-“

“No, you don’t understand, Damiano!” Victoria raised her voice at him. They never argued. They’ve known each other since childhood and nothing had ever caused an issue, except for this.

“I did nothing wrong.”

“Really? ‘Cause it looks to me that you broke your lovers heart.”

“Y/N left me,” he said, trying to reason.

“They might have physically left, but, Damiano, you were gone a long time ago.” She started towards the front door of his house, grabbing her keys.

“Where are you going?” Damiano asked.

“Home. But, let me tell you something first, Dami.” She put her hand on the doorknob. “It doesn’t matter how you try to defend yourself, you fucked up. You broke Y/N’s heart. You were talking to someone else. The damage is done. If you’re gonna try and get them back, you’re gonna have to try really damn hard. You want to get Y/N back, right?”

Silence followed. Victoria gave him a second to compose himself, but ultimately feared the worst. “Dami…”

“I mean, yeah, but-“

“No buts. You shouldn’t be saying ‘but’, you have no reason to.” Damiano just looked at her. “Wow… unbelievable.” Victoria opened the door and walked out, slamming the door behind her. Damiano walked up to the door and locked it. He headed back to the living room and heard his phone ding. He picked it up and saw that you had posted a photo.

Just continuing a small tradition tonight with music and alcohol. maybe if he lets me, i’ll post Alex singing Feeling Good 😏🤍

He sighed. He unlocked his phone, and went to go see the photo you posted. You looked nice. Happy. What was the tradition again?

Right, karaoke. The weekend before the band records an album, everyone goes to a karaoke bar. He scrolled down a bit and saw a comment. He saw Victoria’s comment.

Ahhh you look amazing!!!😘

He figured that she saw the post before she pulled out of his driveway. He debated on what he should do.

Yeah, he fucked up. But, it really wasn’t that bad. It’s not like he cheated. It was just talking. He wanted to tell you that you look great, but wasn’t sure how you would feel about it. Like Y/N would care what I think, he thought to himself. You never broke up, though. Plus, he needs to know what’s going on, how you’re doing. He’s concerned. Couldn’t be the worst thing— it’s not like the internet knows yet.

Ok, I’ll just just comment.

——

Caught a vibe

Baby, are you coming for the ride

I just wanna look into your eyes

I just wanna stay for the night, night, night

You and Reginald were jamming out to the song, as per usual. Everyone was loving it, even the rest of the band. It was the most fun you’ve had in a hot second.

When we take a drive

Maybe we can take the 405

Hypnotized by the light

Man, this must be the life

As the song ended, everyone cheered you two on. You went over and hugged Reggie on his side, him giving a small hug back. You guys walked back to your booth, the whole band full of excitement. Alex got up from his seat and let the two of you in, you sitting in the corner of the booth.

“That was amazing!” Luke exclaimed.

“Thanks, we had fun,” Reggie said, practically reading your mind.

“Definitely.”

“Your voices go so well together,” Flynn remarked.

“That’s exactly what I said!” you said, hitting Reginald’s shoulder so he knows your point is proven.

“Ok, we don’t have to be violent about it,” he joked, smirking just a bit.

“Yeah, whatever. I’m gonna go to the restroom real quick. I’ll be back,” you said, waiting for Alex and Reggie to stand up so you can go. You grabbed your phone, stood up, and made your way to the restroom. When you got to the restroom, you went to one of the stalls but checked your phone before you did anything else. However, you almost immediately regretted it because you saw that Damiano had commented on your photo.

What the hell does he want?

You read what he had commented, and, honestly, you wanted to laugh.

You look great tonight, as you do every night, amore

You couldn’t believe it. Amore, really? you thought to yourself. You looked up from your phone, looking at the stall door. You contemplated what to do next:

For starters, keeping the comment wouldn’t be out of the norm for your followers. They knew about you and Damiano. However, if you deleted (which you really wanted to do), everyone would notice. People would speculate. Or, you could just go off on Damiano privately. That would be too harsh. But, this is your account— your decision. Do you want to have your cheater boyfriend compliment you the way he did?

You know what, do it later, you thought, turning off your phone and finally, actually, using the restroom.

Once you finished, you exited the stall and walked over to the sinks. You washed your hands, not able to get that damn comment off of your mind.

You walked out of the restroom and back over to the booth, but you didn’t sit down.

“Alex,” you said, standing next to him. “Can I talk to you?” He looked up at you, unsure of what you wanted to talk about, but got up anyway. You grabbed his hand and pulled him outside.

When you two got out there, you sat down on a bench, Alex following your move.

“Is everything alright?” You opened your phone and went to Instagram, showing Alex to comment Damiano left. “Oh.”

“Yeah. I just don’t know what to do, and it is tearing me apart. Do I delete it? Do I keep it? Do I argue with him?”

“Delete the comment, and, Y/N, please, block him on social media. You don’t have to block his number, but you should block him everywhere else.”

“Why not his number,” you asked.

“Because you need closure. At some point, you’re gonna want to text him or call him and try to get some understanding as to why he did what he did. You haven’t actually broken up yet. Maybe that’s how you finish off?”

After a moment of contemplation (again), you nodded your head slowly.

“Ok. Yeah, ok, I’ll do that.” You lowered your head and searched through your following to find Damiano’s account. You clicked the three dots at the top, and looked for the block button.

“You sure this is the right thing to do?”

“Yes. Want me to do it?”

“No, no, it’s fine. I can do it.”

You looked at the button for a second. You’ve never even thought of blocking him before. I’m your mind, he was the one. Now? Well, you’re blocking him because he cheated on you, so obviously your idea of him completely shifted.

I can do this.

Your hands started shaking slightly, your heart was beating like crazy.

I can do this.

Slowly, you moved your finger over the button.

Click it, it’ll be fine.

And, so, you did. You clicked the button.

You felt free.

———————————————————————-

Taglist for 3yrs — i’m so sorry if i couldn’t tag you!*

@mywritingonlyfans @nientedaridere @pingpongchamps @fairysums @kkjk @blackbluerose666 @thatmeganthing @teenyweenynightghost @ccweasley @lilchickie @katyldamusic @fanfictioncafe @tiaamberxx @butkutee @aboredassho @story-scribbler

*(for those who want to be tagged, please have stuff posted onto your blog and make sure that your blog isn’t censored <3)

[puckyess]

I Hope Part 2 | Roman Ahcan & Brock Caufield

For the morning crowd: Get your tissues ready! I’m super happy with how this turned out. Let me know your favorite part. Listen to the Afterglow/Ghostin’ mashup for some extra sadness (linked on my blog). S/o to @penaltbox for getting this one going ❤️❤️

*Italics indicate flashbacks

*** FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED***

Words: 10.1k

Part 1 // Part 3

“I forgive you, Ro, I really do. It’s the forgetting that’s the hard part. I can forgive, but I can’t forget”

Your words hung heavy in the air and he accepted them graciously. You had just basically rejected Roman, the least you could do now was offer him a place to crash for the night. While his apology had brought you some nice closure, you weren’t ready to jump into a relationship with him and at this point, you weren’t even sure you wanted to anymore. He definitely still had a hold on you, but that’s what scared you. He had just piled a lot on you and you needed some time to digest it all. Doing that with him a room away was not ideal, but you didn’t have the heart to throw him out, especially at this hour.

“Do you want to stay here tonight? It’s late, well early now. I don’t want you out this time of night” you asked him. It felt odd to ask him to stay in a non romantic way after everything.

“On the couch?” He shyly questions.

You crack a smile at his shyness, a contrast to the overconfident Ro you were used to getting. “Yes, on the couch, Ro”.

He agrees after some prodding and that’s how you find yourself digging through the drawer that used to be his, but is now someone else’s, for clothes for him to wear for the night.

He watches you and can’t help but stare at the back of your shirt. “We play for each other” written in the signature Wisconsin font. Who’s was it? Were you dating someone on the team? How had he missed that? He’d admittedly gone through your social media a lot lately and hadn’t detected anything unusual, just the regular back and forth chirping, no flirty interactions, but now he was going to have to go analyze the boys’ comments. Would they do that to him though?

He’s broken from his thoughts when you stand up and say, “These are Brock’s but they should fit, you guys are like close to the same size”. His eyes zoom in on the red 29 on the leg of the sweatpants in your hands.

“Of fucking course” he thinks to himself. He should’ve known Brock would weasel his way in the first chance he got. He tried to not let his irritation leak into his voice as he thanked you for Brock’s clothes and you pretended to not notice the way the muscle in his jaw twitched when you said Brock’s name. It was just like old times.

—

You laid in bed that night, unable to fall asleep. Tonight had brought up so many feelings and memories. You thought long and hard about the boy sleeping on your couch. From the first time you encountered his fiery temper, to your roller coaster of a time together, to the night that everything went to hell and the mess he left behind.

Living across from a quarter of the men’s hockey team was a blessing and a curse. They were constantly yelling and tonight was no exception, this time accompanied with incessant pounding on a door. You shouldn’t be nosy you kept telling yourself, but a little peek through your peephole wouldn’t hurt anything right? If only you had known how much he would come to change your life.

You peered out just in time to see the boy laying another beating on the door and then putting his whole body into yelling, ”Fuck!”, dropping his head back in defeat when his efforts were met with silence.  He must be locked out. You take a deep breath and open your own door, propping yourself against the door frame. “I was going to invite you inside, but with a temper like that I don’t know that I should?” You tease him, sending a little smile his way to let him know you were only giving him a hard time.

That was the first time you had seen that smirk you love so much spread across his face. You would come to find out his name was Roman and he quickly became your person. Well, besides the other boy in your life who was your best friend.

The highs of your relationship with Roman were so high. You were borderline inseparable with each other. He did everything he was supposed to as a boyfriend, he was the type of guy that you’d proudly brag to your family about, the one your friends looked at and said “I wish”. He could be sweet and thoughtful, and had a spark to him that you adored, his temper the first time you met him, proof of that. He was that little rough around the edges kind of guy that every girl chased, a little mean to everyone but you. You were his soft spot and for a while, you couldn’t have written a better love story. In hindsight things were probably too perfect, you should’ve seen the storm that was brewing.

Between the friction between Brock and Roman and Roman’s wandering eyes, the lows could be pretty low. It was the same old fights every time, always starting and ending the same. Roman never acted on his insensitive behavior, but it still didn’t sit well with you. You tried not to play the jealous girlfriend part too often but sometimes it would just build and build until you snapped and then you both engaged in loud arguments, leaving a sinking feeling in your stomach, but Ro always managed to patch things up afterwards with flowers or warm baths that made you forget all about what had just transpired, at least until next time.  

Roman’s jealousy would shine at moments too. He’d call you out saying, “You baby Brock too much” and that “You shouldn’t worry about someone you’re not dating as much as you do. He can handle himself, he’s a big boy” anytime you’d defend Brock, and then under his breath he’d mumble “He’s too soft already” and that drove you crazy. You’d frown at your boyfriend's lack of empathy and ill feelings toward one of the most important people in your life. You had heard some of the stories the boys would tell you and you knew he called Brock soft to his face and you hated it. You loved his temper, but not when it was directed toward your best friend. You had no idea why the boys hated each other so much. Part of the reason you were always so nice to Brock was to make up for your boyfriend's behavior, though if only you knew the half of what Roman said to Brock. You’d called Roman out on it multiple times and instead of apologizing, he’d say, “It’s not like it’s not true. You know it, I know it, and he knows it”. You of course can’t just sit around and leave B out to dry when he wasn’t even around to defend himself so cue another fight. The cycle was endless.

You had half expected Brock to come over and check in on you the night that Owen sent you that picture and your world had caved in on itself, but he had only sent you a simple text that said “I love you. You’ll get through this, I’ll help you”. And then he was at your door the next morning with coffee and a shoulder to cry on, ready to let you grieve and then when you were ready, to pick up all the pieces.

You finally fell asleep that night, not thinking about the boy who had torn you apart but instead about the one who had helped you to grow and become who you were today.

Roman laid on your couch, his mind going a mile a minute. You having a drawer full of Brock’s clothes answered his earlier question about the T-shirt. He hadn’t asked about it though, not wanting to start a fight. You always had a soft spot for the kid. It was one of the very few sore spots of your relationship.

How could he not hate Brock’s guts though? The kid had a huge stinking crush on you and you had no clue, you just continued to show him affection and give him your attention. He thought about all the times you’d go running to Brock after you two had gotten in an argument and he did know about all of them because Brock would waste no time in posting to his Snapchat. But never in a way where it could get turned on him for rubbing it in Roman’s face, it was always just enough so that Roman would know he was with his girl but if Ro dared to bring it up to you you’d take Brock’s side no matter what. You stuck up for Roman in every other situation and would fight a whole hockey team for him, but not when it came to Brock. He wasn’t blind, he knew that Brock could steal you without even trying, though he did credit the kid with trying.

He thought about all the times he had dangled the carrot over your head, practically telling you about Brock’s feelings for you and how you’d watch as Brock’s cheeks reddened and defend Brock and tell Roman to knock it off. He thought about the time that Brock had caused yet another fight by telling you about some locker room talk. That was the first time you had threatened to break up with him and damn it if that didn’t fuel his hatred for his teammate.

Roman sat in his stall, trying to get dressed for practice, but was unable to because all he could hear was Brock’s voice. Normally he could just block it out, but today he was talking to Alex about you and well, he just couldn’t have that. He was downright gushing as he happily told him about grabbing dinner with you at the Union the other night. He rolled his eyes as he bent down to tie his skates. It was time to remind Brock who you belonged to, who had won and who had lost. He begins to tell Tarek and Josh all about the activities that had taken place after your little dinner with Brock. He bragged maybe a little too loud about things you’d hate knowing he talks about in front of the boys, just to make sure Brock heard. Normally, Brock would sit back and take it. He knew that Roman messed with him to get a reaction out of him. But today he was degrading you in front of everyone and he wouldn’t allow that, so he speaks up on your behalf.

“No one wants to hear how quick you are in bed, Ahcan. She probably doesn’t appreciate it either”.

Roman’s face twisted into a smirk knowing he was about to hit him where it hurts. “Shut up, Caufield. We all know you wish you could please her like I do. 30 minutes or 30 seconds, it’s still more than you’ll ever get with her”.

The locker room falls silent and Brock bites his tongue so hard he tastes blood. The amount of disrespect Roman had just shown you made him sick. It takes all of his self control to not tackle Roman in the middle of the locker room. Luckily, his brother keeps him busy as he goes to lunge at Roman, himself. Brock has to throw an arm across his brother and shove him back to his stall. “Don’t”, he says, shooting him a dangerous look. “He’s not worth it. I’ll take care of it”. Cole’s fuming, as he aggressively grabs his stick that’s fallen to the floor in the hustle of things. “You better”, he says as he storms out of the locker room, shoulder checking Roman along the way.

He’d kept his mouth closed about all of Roman’s other taunting and bullshit, but this was unacceptable. He couldn’t let this slide. You deserved to know that your personal business was being spread out for all to hear in the locker room. So he grabbed his phone and sent you a quick text. “Your boy keeps running his mouth about all your bedroom activities in the locker room. Figured you should know.”

When you read the text your heart dropped. It was basically one of your worst nightmares. All of your business and most vulnerable moments on display for a bunch of guys who could pick you apart and look at you differently. You had trusted Roman enough to give yourself to him and this is how he respected you? You felt so many things, but betrayed and angry were at the top of the list. You were ready to lay into his ass when he got back from practice.

You let Roman have it the second he walked through the door. He brushes your feelings aside, as he’s more concerned with who told you.

“I knew that little shit would go running to you”

“It doesn’t matter who told me, but I’m glad they did! There’s two people in this relationship, not a whole locker room”

“Exactly, Y/N, there’s two people in a relationship, the key word being two, not three. Tell Brock to fuck off”

“God, that’s not even the point, Roman. It’s like I speak and you just don’t even listen!”

“How am I not listening? You just said there’s two people in the relationship and I agree with you, but Brock thinks he’s one of those two people and so yeah, maybe I had to remind him who gets to please you in bed and that’s not him”

“If you ever. Fuck and tell again, I swear to God Roman, you’ll be single. I’ll dump your ass so quick. No more kill stories in the locker room.”

While he knew your threat was probably hollow because of the darkness that had taken over your eyes ever since he mentioned pleasing you in bed, part of him should’ve known to never doubt you.

Brock had won that round, you had put Roman in his place rather than him putting Brock in his. He couldn’t stand the fact that you spent so much time with someone who he knew for a fact wanted you as much as he did, especially someone who was the polar opposite of Roman, himself. What if you woke up one day and wanted the sweet guy? Roman knew he wasn’t sweet. The gentle, always doing the right things guy? He tried to show that side of himself to you, but he was generally hard headed, feisty, and anything but just plain old nice. Brock already seemed to fill so many places in your life, he couldn’t let him take over the boyfriend role too. So he made sure Brock knew his place and he had been chastised by you more times than once for it. And apparently it hadn’t worked because it looks like he took his place anyway.

It made him question the night everything went down. Was Brock the one who had sent the picture? He doesn’t remember seeing him there, though he doesn’t remember a whole lot from that night besides the fight. Your look of hurt had stayed with him but he had someone else to go to during that time so he had put the little detail of how you had managed to get the picture in the first place to the back of his mind. Laying here on your couch now, it would make perfect sense for it to have been Brock. He had always had a nagging suspicion but never talked to you about that night.

—

The bye week couldn’t have come at a more perfect time. The boys had hit a rough patch, having lost three weekends in a row now and the tensions in the locker room were high. The combination of losing and Brock’s history with Roman made for a stressful past month.

Brock breathed a sigh of relief when he didn’t spot Roman anywhere in the bar. Some of the guys had decided to blow off some steam and reset for the upcoming weekend by going out tonight. He scanned the room once more making sure he didn’t see you, but since Roman wasn’t here he didn’t assume you would be either. Ever since you had started dating him, you barely went anywhere without each other much to his dismay. Yes, he had feelings for you but that didn’t change the fact that you were also his best friend. He missed you in more ways than one.

“Dude, she already said she wasn’t coming out tonight”, Ty said, nudging his teammate.

Brock replies instantly, “I don’t know who you’re talking about”. But he knows he’s been caught looking for you again. He doesn’t say anything about the fact that Ty had known who he was looking for without asking.

Owen shows up then with an arm full of beers and a handful of shots. Brock throws back a shot with barely a grimace. It was going to be one hell of a night.

Flash forward a few rounds and the boys are rolling. It had been a fun, easygoing night, exactly what everyone needed. That is until Brock turns his head and spots a certain someone a few tables over. His eyes narrow and he has to do a double take.

His jaw clenches and his hand that wasn’t holding his drink, balls up. He swears he sees red as he looks on at the scene playing out three tables over. He reaches over and grabs Owen’s arm so hard Owen says ow and swats his hand away.

“Please. Tell me that isn’t my Y/N’s Roman making out with that girl?” He says through gritted teeth. He can’t take his eyes away.

“There’s no way..” Owen trails off in disbelief. That was most definitely a girl straddling Roman, her tongue down his throat and that girl was no where close to being you.

The rest of the guys look over then at what has their teammates so dumbfounded and the same silence spreads across the group amidst all the noise of the bar. With ten pairs of eyes burning holes into their faces, the pair continues to make out in the corner, as if you weren’t at home waiting for your boyfriend to return to you.

Brock is livid. He slams his glass down so hard the liquid splashes out and he’s ready to rip Roman to shreds. How could he do that to you? Sure, he had always had an issue with Roman, how could he not? Roman had the girl he had been crushing on since the first day he met her and Roman had no problem rubbing that in his face any chance he got. But he did make you happy (most of the time) and that’s what mattered to Brock. This though? Throwing all of that away, your trust, happiness? It made Brock want to cave Roman’s face in. Nostrils flaring, he’s up and out of his seat.

Owen is quick to grab B’s arm and frantically looks to the other guys for help. Owen’s taller frame was no match for Brock’s 5’9  one when he was fired up and boy, was he fired up. Cole was in front of him then and shoving his older brother back in his seat.

“You can’t go fighting him right now. Not now, not here in the middle of a bar” Cole says, trying to talk some sense into his furious brother.

Brock was seething. “Who does he think he is? This is going to kill Y/N, I’m going to fucking kill him!”

O backs Cole up, “Your brother’s right, man. We all love Y/N, but you and I both know how she is when it comes to Roman. She won’t like that you threw the first punch”.

Brock’s shaking his head at that, he knows they’re right. You always gave Roman the benefit of the doubt and it really grinded Brock’s gears when you made exceptions for Roman. He took you for granted and didn’t appreciate you the way Brock knew he could.

“She probably wouldn’t believe me, just say I’ve always had it out for him. She’s not wrong but I can’t be the one to tell her about this”.

The boys all agree on this and finally Owen says, “Why don’t I just send her a picture? She can’t deny it if it’s right there in front of her, right?”

Brock finally agrees with a small nod. He hates that he can’t just knock Roman out right there. And he hates even more what this picture is going to do to you. He wishes you would’ve just picked him and you never would’ve had to deal with this pain. But you hadn’t, you had chosen the more exciting boy, with his flaring temper and charming smirk. You chose to pass over the cute, boy next door who was everything you needed but nothing you wanted.

—

You should have known that word would get out somehow that Roman had stopped by. The boys hockey team was worse than old women at tea time when it came to gossip.

You barely had time to register the neatly folded blanket and clothes on your couch before your door was swung open and a very pissed off and hurt looking Brock is storming through it, coffee in hand.

“Well good morning to you too. What’re you doing here so early?” You said in the middle of a yawn.

He shoots you an irritated look. “Early? It’s past noon, Y/N. Or is your long night with Roman screwing with your head again? I can’t believe he had the audactiy to show up here after everything.” The venom in the way he says Roman’s name has you rolling your eyes. Roman had been..civil about Brock last night. Though you noticed the way he tensed about the clothes, he hadn’t said anything. Brock was your rock, your level headed one and yet he was the one speaking out today.

“You do realize this is my apartment you’re standing in right? And my business? And my life?” You’re annoyed that he wants to have this argument again and right after you woke up. He was not catching you at a good time.

Brock had a hard time hearing it wasn’t his life. It was like his hands were pinned behind his back. Roman being back in your life very much affected his own because that would mean he’d lose you again and you were very much a big part of his life.

“Roman staying the night has nothing to do with you” you tell him, plopping yourself on the couch. You catch a glimpse of the hurt that flashes across Brock’s face, along with something else you couldn’t quite place as you reach for your coffee.

Brock felt like he had just been slapped in the face. He had always been there for you, that night and every night there after. He had finally gotten his best friend back and at times it felt like he could have more than that and now you were just brushing him off like his opinion meant nothing. It absolutely killed him that you couldn’t see how much this had to do with him. He was there for you, he’d always been there for you and yet he couldn’t be there for you in the way that he wanted to because you wouldn’t let him.

He wanted to shake you. “That’s where you’re wrong, Y/N. This has every bit to do with me. I was there when he broke you and I helped you pick up the pieces. I let you cry on my shoulder, sleep in my bed. Not just that night but so many times before that. Or do you not remember why ice cream is our thing now? Or all of the walks home we’ve had? And all of the games of pong we’ve played? I’ve put up with so much shit from him for you and I’m sick of seeing you get hurt over and over by the same guy when you deserve so much better than that”.

You weren’t insecure by any means, but everyone had their days and today just so happened to be yours. You had a long day at work and didn’t really want to go out to dinner with the guys, but you had already promised Roman and Brock that you’d be there.

You trailed behind Roman as he led you to the table. Brock immediately noticed that your smile was off as you leaned in to give him a quick hug, not wanting to set off your boyfriend. He gave you an extra squeeze and then released you. He noticed the little frown on your face when the waitress shamelessly flirted with Roman in front of you and Roman made no effort to stop her, even giving into her banter and eyelashes. Wanting to see you smile again, he gave you a little nudge and asked if you were getting the kids’ meal, poking fun at the fact that your ordered chicken fingers everywhere you went. You cracked a smile and playfully punched his arm and then got serious again to tell him that yes, you were in fact going to devour some chicken’s fingers, which he chuckled at. 

However when it got around to being your turn to order, Roman spoke up for you. “She’ll just have a salad.” He says to the waitress and she shoots you a look that says she agrees with that being an appropriate selection for you. “Aren’t you trying to start that diet? That’s what you said when you were jumping into your jeans before we got here. Now’s a good time to start” he asks you rather loudly. Your face heats up, embarrassed, but you mumble a “yeah, I guess” and close your menu, handing it to the girl and then looking down at your hands in your lap. Brock is absolutely speechless and the rest of the table is equally uncomfortable. As much as he wanted to deck Roman, he wanted to wrap you up in his arms and tell you how perfect you were even more.

When you snap Brock later that night, you’re by yourself and your face is still in a frown. He knows he has to do something about it, so he asks if you want to go get ice cream with him. You snap back that you really shouldn’t and you’re biting your lip and it makes Brock throw his head back with a groan. Why did the universe hate him so much? He leaves you on open, but grabs his keys and ends up showing up at your door.

“B, what’re you doing here?” you question. Your hair is thrown up in a messy bun and you’re in a pair of sweats and a baggy Badgers hockey tshirt. You look so beautiful and natural, he has to really concentrate to remember what exactly he’s supposed to be doing.

“You said you wanted ice cream?” he said with a smile, as if it were obvious.

You smiled back. “I believe I said that I shouldn’t get ice cream”.

He wouldn’t be taking no for an answer tonight. “No, I think you said you should get ice cream. Go get your shoes or don’t, but we’re still going”.

You shake your head at your best friend, but take the couple steps backward to retrieve your shoes and coat and lock your door as you head off to ruin the diet you hadn’t started.

A short drive later, you find yourself standing at Dairy Queen’s counter debating over a cookie dough or oreo blizzard. “I’ll have a small cookie dough blizzard, please”, you finally decide.

Brock also orders and the cashier asks, “Are you guys together?”

“Yeah, we’re together” he answers and then looking over at you his eyes widen in alarm. “I mean no, we’re not together, well we’re together but not together together”, he stutters over his words.

You’re looking at him like he’s lost his mind, but you’re also laughing, “B, chill. She meant our orders.” and then looking at the annoyed cashier, “yes, to clarify, our orders are together”. Brock mumbles an apology, handing over some bills.

“Well that was fun”, Brock huffs as he brings over your tray. When he sets down a chicken tender basket in front of you, your heart swells.

“What’s this?”

He just shrugs. “Figured you might want your kids’ meal. That salad didn’t look very filling”.

You swear you could cry on the spot at how thoughtful he was. “You noticed that too huh?”

“I notice everything, Y/N”, he says, taking another bite of his blizzard.

“So how is this fair? My boyfriend is an ass to you and me both, yet you’re the one buying me ice cream. Shouldn’t I be buying this for you?”

“How is he an ass to me?” Brock asks you. You’re not wrong, but he’s surprised you’ve noticed.

You give him a sheepish look. “A couple of the boys told me about what Roman said at the bar after last week’s game.”

-

Brock knew what you were referring to even though you were being very vague with your words.

 They had gotten shut out and everyone all around had just had an off night. They had gone to the bar to blow off some steam but Roman was still heated, he took a while to calm down. You were off playing pool with Brock and it irritated Roman to no end as he watched you laugh easily with the wannabe lover. Soon your game finished though and you headed to the restroom before rejoining your boyfriend and the group and Roman took advantage of his opportunity. He was jealous and angry and just feeling a little mean so he took a swing at Brock.

“Hey, Caufield, maybe you should spend less time at the pool table and more time on the ice. We would’ve won tonight if you would’ve hit any of the shots you took. You were like 0 for 20.”

Brock looked at him wondering where this was all coming from right now. “Yeah, it wasn’t my best night”, he admitted.

Roman snorts. “Even your best night wouldn’t be good enough. You should stop trying to be your brother, you’ll never be as good as him. The only reason you’re even on the team is because they wanted Cole here, so they tried to sweeten the deal by letting you play” he says pointing at Cole with his beer and then taking a swig.

The comment brings an onslaught of “Hey, hey, hey”, “I think you’ve had enough”, “That was unnecessary” and “You better fucking take that back” from all the guys at the table. Everyone knew Roman could be a real dick when he wanted to be, but that comment was taking it too far. Just then you returned to the table, seeing everyone’s faces you asked “Whoa, what’d I miss?”

“Nothing. As fun as this has been, I think I’m gonna head home” he said looking at Roman. You pouted, but you didn’t question it as you hugged him goodbye and told him to text you when he got home so you knew he was safe.

-

“By a couple of the guys, I'm sure you’re referring to my brother?” he chuckles.

“I didn’t say that”, you tell him, but the small smile you’re wearing tells all.

“Yeah, he was pretty fired up over that”, Brock says.

“As he should’ve been! Why didn’t you say anything that night? I was fucking pissed when I found out. That was completely uncalled for. I let him have it when I found out. We’ve barely spoken all week because I’m still mad at him. Probably why he was such a dick tonight” you say, ripping off another piece of a chicken tender.

Brock just shrugs. “I don’t know why I didn’t say anything that night. It’s not like it’s not true, nothing I haven’t heard before. I know I’ll never be as good as Cole.”

You frown at the boy sitting across from you and take his hand in yours. “You know none of what Roman said is true, right? Not one word. You’re playing hockey for a D1 school and not just any school, the college hockey capital, Brock. You have so much talent and skill, I promise you’re on the team because they need a reliable, dependable, versatile player like you. You’re such a valuable part of the team, B.”

He would probably cry if you weren’t in the middle of Dairy Queen. You said the words with such conviction and love that he believed every one. To think that you saw all of that in him meant the absolute world to him.

“Thank you, Y/N. I can’t tell you how much that means to me”, he tells you honestly.

You beam at him. “Of course, B.”

He smiles back at you. “And to answer your question, no offense, but I’m sure you’ll have the opportunity to buy me ice cream when Roman screws up again. It can be like our thing”.

---

You were at your breaking point as you pulled up Brock’s contact. There was a good chance he was already sleeping and wouldn’t answer, but you had no other options so you pressed call. He answered on the first ring.

“B, I really need you. Can you come get me please?”

Brock shot up in bed at the sound of your shaky voice. “Y/N? Are you okay? Where are you?”

“I- yeah, I’m fine. I’m just stranded. Roman and I got into this huge fight and he left and won’t answer my calls or texts. I’m sorry to bother you, I know you left hours ago, but Roman has my credit card and cash so I can’t even get an Uber… I could walk, but it’s kind of far”

“No” he just about yells into the phone. “Don’t you dare leave wherever you are by yourself. I’m coming. I’m leaving right now, just send me your location and stay on the phone with me so I know you’re ok, okay?”.

You do and he curses to himself. He couldn’t believe Roman left you stranded and drunk at a party in the middle of Madison. That was low, even for Roman.

“B, why do you sound so out of breath? Are you running?” you ask. You can hear his breathing through the phone and it sounds slightly labored.

“Are you calling me out of shape?” he jokes, “Yeah, I had a few beers tonight so I don’t want to take the chance of driving. We can walk home together. But I want to get to you as soon as I can so I’m jogging. I’m about a block away now, should see you in five or so minutes”.

You blink away your surprise, your hand clutching at your heart. You look up to the sky and thank whoever it was above for blessing you with Brock.

“How did I get so lucky to have a best friend like you?”

You don’t see him trip as you say “best friend”. It must’ve been a crack in the sidewalk, just like the one in his heart.

--

You knew going in that dating a basically famous college hockey player wasn’t going to be easy. You knew what you signed up for. Admittedly, most of the time Roman would make you forget about the outside world. He acted like any other boyfriend, spoiling you with love and affection. But there were times that the ugly side of what he does came to bite you and unfortunately he was the one to bring it up.

It was a Saturday night and the boys were having a party to celebrate the weekend’s sweep. Your night had been great until you had heard Roman’s comments. You were standing with a small group of girls gossiping about the one girl’s interest in Mike when you heard your boyfriend’s voice brag about the “hundreds of girls flooding his Dm’s after that game against Ohio State”.

“No way you have hundreds, there was barely anyone there at those games last weekend”. Tarek pointed out, trying to call his bluff.

“Okay, maybe not hundreds, but there’s a ton. I could literally have any girl I wanted. And they’re all like, really hot too.” He glanced to his left and saw you standing there, but you were turned, not paying him any attention so he continued, “Check out the rack on this one, pretty face to match too”.

Your heart sunk as you listened to the boys talk, one boy in particular really. You turned around just to make sure it was your boyfriend even though you’d know his voice anywhere. He was standing with a group of the guys, his profile to you, but he was only a handful of steps away. Close enough for you to see him holding out his phone to prove to Tarek that he had a bunch of Dm’s. You watched on as his thumb scrolled down the list until he found the girl he wanted to show off. You suddenly didn’t feel like being at the party anymore.

Brock was standing with Lex, Cole, Ryder, and Dylan when he first heard bits of the conversation going on in the group next to him. His temper flared as he realized it was Roman who was doing the bragging. If Roman even glanced to his left in the slightest, he would’ve seen you standing there, well within earshot. And then he watched as Roman did just that, looked right at you and still continued to show off. Brock too looked over at you, hoping by some miracle that you weren't hearing what was going on. But when his eyes fell on you, you were already staring at Roman and there was a pained expression on your features. His heart broke for you and he wished for the millionth time that he could show you what love really is. But he couldn’t so he settled for at least getting you out of that situation. He didn’t even bother saying anything to the boys as he removed himself from the group and walked over to you, placing himself right in between you and Roman.

“Can I steal you for a few? I could really use a kick ass pong partner” he asked, smirking at you. He knew you loved pong, it was one of the few drinking games you were actually good at.

You took one last look over the shoulder of Brock and saw your boyfriend pulling up yet another girl’s profile so you gave Brock a weak smile and followed him across the room to the pong table, far away from Roman.

It only took a few throws for your arms to be held over your head and your chirping to take over. You and Brock pretty much dominated, to the point that it would’ve been boring had you guys not been keeping each other entertained.

With one cup left, Brock looked at you, a confident smirk on his lips. “Are you ready for this trick shot, Y/N? I’ve been practicing.”

You grinned and nodded eagerly. “Show me what you’ve got, Caufield.”

Instead of overhand tossing the pong ball, he flicks his wrist underhand so that the ball bounces off the ceiling and arcs directly into the remaining cup.

His arms raise wide above his head and he backs up in a subtle celly. The smile on his face can only be described as cocky.

Your jaw is still on the floor, but you're screeching and launching yourself into his arms. He easily catches you, lifting you off of your feet and spinning you around.

The room is loud, still reacting to Brock’s trick shot, but you don’t hear any of it as he holds you close, still having not put you back on your feet. The smile on your face is bright when you tell him, “I can’t believe you just did that! I hope you know you just sealed your fate as my pong partner for life”.

---

“While I appreciate you doing all of that, and I really do, I couldn't have done it without you, I didn’t ask you to do any of that. Never did I ask you to come save me” you snapped at him, trying to defend yourself. And it was true, you had never once asked for Brock to come save you, he just did.

Hands running through his hair, tugging hard, that’s when Brock explodes. You were practically proving his point. “That’s the thing, Y/N, is you shouldn’t have to ask! It should just be normal for someone who cares about you to not hurt you over and over and to be there for you and help you get better when you’re hurting, not just turn their back on you with some other girl and then just show back up in your life when they decide they want you back. That’s not how it’s supposed to be.” He’s looking at you desperately, you were putting him in jail for something he didn’t even do.

You know he’s right. You know it with every bone in your body. Roman had done things that were far from loving and had conditioned you to think that that’s what love looked like. You had made exceptions for his behavior and built a tolerance for his actions. And that’s not how it was supposed to be. But you had also loved him and part of you still did and that was hard to just turn off and forget, you would know because you had tried.

“Brock, I loved him. You know that. What was I supposed to do? Things weren’t perfect, but I couldn’t just throw away what we had and pretend that I didn’t feel anything for him. I accepted him and his flaws because that's what love is.”

He hears every word of what you’re saying because he feels it too. He was living a parallel life, but with you. As much as he’s tried and wishes he could, he can’t just turn off his feelings for you and pretend they weren’t there. He accepted your flaws even if giving too much of yourself to others who didn’t deserve you was one of them. He wants to tell you that he could have shown you what loving hard instead of hard love is but he knows the time isn’t right for that confession yet. There’s still a lot left to be said.

“Well he threw it away for you and now you’re what? Just going to let him walk right back in again? You’re going to let him back in like usual? It’s not hard to see why he doesn’t take you seriously, if you don’t even take yourself seriously. You need to at least respect yourself, since he never does. You’re better than that, Y/N. We worked so hard-“ he corrects himself, “you worked so hard to be strong and build yourself back up...I’m just afraid he’ll break you again”.

His concern was well placed but the fact that he just assumes that you’d let Roman walk back in, even though you almost did and that he thought you’d break so easily was disappointing. “Well what am I supposed to do Brock? I’m not some D1 big time hockey player like you, I don’t just have this line waiting at my door to take me out like you guys do”

Brock’s voice catches in his throat as he almost lets out the secret he’s been keeping bottled up from you. But he panics and instead tells you, “you need to figure this out, Y/N because I can’t stand by and watch that happen again. And if you do decide that he’s the one you want and you’re willing to let him into your life again, I can’t promise to be there to put back the pieces this time.”

His statement makes your eyebrows shoot up.You don’t know that you’d still be here had Brock not been there for you, and as he pointed out not just this past time but so many times before. You can’t imagine having to go through another heartbreak, much less without having Brock at your side. Your heart’s racing at the thought of losing him. His statement surprises you and hits you like a ton of bricks. Why’d you have to break what you love so much?

“You’d leave me?” You quietly ask him, tears threatening to spill.

He sighs, shaking his head. Why was this so hard? “I’d never leave you,” he says swallowing hard, “but I can’t hurt like that again”.

The look on his face shatters your heart and you know you’re the one to blame.

You don’t miss that he’s talking about himself and you hate that you’ve caused him so much hurt over the years. You’d put him through more than one ever should and you’re hating yourself because this is the first time he’s admitting to you that it hurts him. Hurts him to see you with someone else, hurts him to always be the one to pick up the pieces, and hurts him that you might pick that someone over him again. You knew his feelings for you, you had for a while now. Cole had pulled you aside and told you as much and as if that wasn’t confirmation enough, you had accidentally overheard Brock say it himself, just not to you.

Brock had invited you over for a movie night, something you had done regularly with him in the months before you had started dating Roman. But ever since you started seeing Ro they had become less and less frequent until it got to the point where they ceased to exist all together. So he had finally reserved you for the night and had a whole night planned for you two to catch up. Or so he thought.

He was rushing around his dorm, trying to find his wallet and keys to go pick you up. He needed to hurry so that you guys weren’t late for your reservation. A new steak place had opened up downtown and though it was a little more fancy than your usual pizza dates, he knew you had been wanting to try it so he made the reservation.

“B if you’re five minutes late they’re not going to give your table away” Cole tells his brother, sensing his nerves.

“Yeah but if I’m five minutes late picking Y/N up, then we’re going to be 15 minutes late to the restaurant and then the table will be gone” he replies.

Cole shakes his head at how well Brock knows you. The boy had it bad. “Yeahhh you’re right. You better get a move on then.”

Brock huffs in response as he trips putting his other shoe on.

“Oh and good luck on your date” Cole calls as Brock heads out the door, lightly teasing him. Brock smiles but flips his little brother off as he shuts the door.

Not 20 minutes later, a very disappointed and frustrated Brock is slinking his way back through the door. Cole pauses the game he had been watching on the tv and turns toward Brock as he throws himself on the couch.

“She cancelled.” Brock mumbles into the cushion.

“What?!” Cole questions. He shouldn’t be surprised, he could probably guess as to the reason you cancelled but he couldn’t believe you’d do that to Brock and so last minute.

“S’fine. I’m fine. Everything’s fine.” He said, face still pressed into the couch.

“It’s not fine, Brock! I get that you’re like in love with her but she doesn’t just get a pass. That was really shitty. Did she say why she cancelled?”  He was fired up now, as Brock should’ve been but he would let you get away with murder.

He sighed as he pushed himself to a seated position and shrugged. “Said Roman had some kind of thing planned that he just told her about and she meant to text me about it but forgot. She felt bad”.

And just like that you were let off the hook, Cole could tell by the simple way he justified your actions by saying you felt bad. It didn’t erase the hurt that was in his face even if he tried to make his voice sound casual or the droop in his shoulders. It seems to be a more and more common thing lately and he doesn’t like it.

Turning the tv off he stands up. “Well let’s not let that dinner reservation go to waste. Steak sounds pretty good and you’re buying! ” he says and kicks Brock’s shoe to get him off the couch and back out the door.

As it turns out, Cole was right and they won’t give the table away if you're five minutes late. The steak was actually worth the reservation and it was nice to spend some one on one time with his brother. He knew nights like that wouldn’t last much longer. Brock seemed to be in less of a slump but Cole continued his care taking, telling Abby he’d call her tomorrow and catch her up on the Brock/Y/N saga to watch movies with his brother.

His phone rings in the middle of Grown Ups and Cole doesn’t even have to guess to know who it is. “You should just leave her hanging after she ditched you tonight” he says.

Brock shoots him a look and picks up on the second ring. “Y/N? Is everything ok?”

With the movie paused, Cole can hear the whole conversation, though he could’ve told Brock without having heard. It was the same old story. Roman promised one thing and then did another, leaving you upset and Brock comforting you. Of course he invited you over and offered to come and get you, already putting his shoes back on before even hanging up the phone.

“You deserve better than second best, Brock” he honestly tells his brother.

Brock looks at him then with a look of defeat and acceptance. “I’ll take what I can get.”

A short time later he returns with you in tow. You look sad, just as Brock had hours earlier when he walked through that same door, but without you. You give a tight lipped smile to Cole and then you’re following Brock to his bedroom where you’ll spend the night telling Brock about your boyfriend while wrapped in Brock’s arms and in Brock’s bed.

It breaks his heart that you’re crying again over him..Brock would never make you cry until your wedding day when he shed tears of his own and you wouldn’t be able to hold yours in because you always cry when other people do.

The next morning is when Cole decides to give you a reality check. You emerge from Brock’s bedroom in his T-shirt and Cole just raises an eyebrow at you. From an outsider’s point of view, you knew what it looked like. But it was Cole and this was unfortunately a rather regular occurrence. Nothing had happened, nothing would happen. “What?” You ask him as you reach into the cabinet and grab a mug. Their home was basically yours too, you spent so much time there.

“We’re gonna go grab something to eat before he drops me off, do you want to come with us?” You ask. Your offer however, is met with silence even though Cole is staring right at you.

“Dude what’s your problem today? Are you not speaking to me or what?” You question, growing irritated.

Cole thought the world of you, honestly. You had become a close friend but his brother was his favorite person and you were messing with his happiness so it was about time you were put in check.

“You know, one day he won’t be waiting around for you anymore. He’ll have his own girlfriend again and he won’t be able to play part time boyfriend when yours decides to be an asshole”.

He doesn’t specify who “he” is but you know he’s talking about Brock. And he doesn’t come out and say that Brock has feelings for you but “waiting around” sure makes it seem like maybe he does. You want him to just say it.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” you say, looking down at the mug in your hands. Brock’s favorite you think to yourself.

Cole gives you a look and holds his hand out in front of him, gesturing up and down your body. “Come on, Y/N. Don’t give me that. Look at yourself right now. Where are you right now? Where do you spend your time, enough to know where the mugs are? Whose clothes are you wearing? Whose bed did you sleep in? Who was beside you? Who -“

“Okay, okay. Jeez, I get your point” you say, wincing, wanting to stop him there.

“Do you though? Because you let him get all the way to your place before you cancelled on him last night. You didn’t see the look that was on his face when he came back home. He’d been looking forward to this all week, Y/N. He’s been planning this all week. He never gets to see you anymore” Cole continues.

You grimace, knowing you did him dirty. “All week? I felt so bad -“

Cole cuts you off, not wanting to hear the excuse he’s heard a hundred times before “but Roman” is how it always starts.

“Yes. All week. He even made a reservation for you guys at that new steak place you’ve been wanting to go to. Hell the kid spent a half hour going through his closet and making me choose between shirts” he tells you.

Your heart sinks when you hear about all of his wasted efforts and the thought he had put into wanting to have a night with you.

“And you obviously didn’t feel too bad because you still called him when Roman bailed. You always call him, Y/N. Maybe you should think about the fact that he’s always the one you turn to when you need something, maybe he should just be the one. You can’t keep going back and forth between your two boyfriends though, it’s hurting Brock too much and I won’t let that happen anymore. He’s dealing with enough shit right now, he doesn’t need you hurting him too”.

His words sit heavy in your mind and never leave you. You can’t say how much of an impact they’ve had on your affection toward him since then but it definitely plays a part, maybe one larger than you realized.

—

Brock and Roman had been going at each other all day. Brock had started hanging around less and less so you were excited to be able to spend the whole evening together. The boys were having game night and then hitting the bar. Starting with the pregame Roman had been a pain. He was complaining about the whole night and how he didn’t want to share you. This meant he was extra clingy and barely let you out of sight. You really had wanted to see Brock, but he was in the apartment across the hall, the team having to split into two apartments since everyone was coming out tonight.

You pryed yourself from Roman and wandered to the next room, an easy smile spreading across your face as you found who you were looking for. You were instantly wrapped in a warm hug and he kept an arm over your shoulders as he talked close to your ear, trying to be heard over the shouting of the boys. “I saw you earlier and wanted to come say hi but didn’t want your boyfriend to get mad” he tried to play it off as joking but you could hear the slight bite to his words. He didn’t get to say much else as Roman came in and spotted your two heads bent together in the middle of the room. He made a not so light hearted comment about Brock stealing his girl and then all but dragged you back to the other room claiming you guys were up next for pong even though you still had to wait 15 minutes for the game to be finished. 

And that’s how the night went with the two boys exchanging jabs and glares. Roman’s temper is short with you and even shorter for Brock. He’s been making stupid comments to you that he knows get on your nerves like “damn those jeans make your ass look good. Brock doesn’t her ass look good?” And “your shirt’s so low cut every guy in this bar has been staring at your tits, just ask Caufield.” and each time Brock also sends a look your way, one you read as pity and you become frustrated. There was a difference between him complimenting you and him making you feel like a piece of meat and tonight he was doing the latter. He was also dragging Brock into it which he knew you hated and so you became increasingly angry, more with yourself and Roman but after about the tenth time Brock looks over at you you take it out on him and just snap. “I don’t need the looks, ok Brock? I can take care of myself, you looking at me every time he opens his mouth isn’t making anything better”. You can’t quite read the look on his face before he just nods and says he’s going to head out for the night. You groan and guilt and more frustration flood your system. You know you have to go after him because it’s Brock after all. So after corralling a stupidly drunk Roman into his bed you head over to Brock’s to apologize.

The first thing you hear when you go to knock on his door is yelling. You don’t expect to hear anything given the time of night but with the quiet halls you can hear every word he’s shouting. “I just don’t get why she lets him treat her like that! She’s so strong and independent and then she just sits there while he spouts off his mouth the whole night. And she’s so beautiful like how can he even say the things he said tonight.”

He’s obviously talking about you, that much you can tell. You can’t hear what the other person is saying but you do hear what Brock is saying next. “ I just need her to give me one shot. That’s all I’m asking for is one shot to show her how much better I can be for her. Be to her. If I could just show her how much I love her and appreciate her the way she deserves… god why am I not good enough? I do everything I can for her, hell I’d do more if she let me. Do I have to act like an ass to get her attention? Because I’m pretty sure that’s the only thing I haven’t done yet”

You feel extremely guilty standing there in front of his door listening to something he doesn’t know you’re hearing, him pouring his heart out. But you’re frozen in place with his confession. You eventually get your act together and do what you went there to do in the first place, the whole time with your heart beating in your ears.

—

You had never let on that you knew how he felt. You had honestly thought that maybe his feelings for you would lessen until they disappeared since you had at the time still been very much in love with Roman. You hate to say it but you were often times wrapped up in your own drama that you pushed his feelings to the back of your mind but they were always there. With everything that he had told you that night, unknowingly and everything he was saying now, you could see it all in a new light.

Right now, with his cheeks flushed and his chest still heaving from anger and emotion it’s clear that those feelings are still very much present. He’s so worked up that you have to put a hand on his chest, something you often did with Roman, to calm him. Though unlike Roman, B instantly softens as soon as you touch him, practically melting under your hand.

“B, stop. It’s ok, I’m not getting back together with him. We talked and he apologized. It was nice closure, but that’s all it was for me, was closure. I can’t forget what he did. What you did to help me. You’re right, we did build me up and he’s not worth losing myself or you over. I don’t want to do this to you anymore, I don’t want to lose you” You can literally feel his heart skip a beat as you drop this information on him.

His mouth tries to form words but all he comes up with is “oh”. He’s surprised to say the least. “So what now? Is he going to go back to being an asshole to me about you?”

You frown. “Not if I have anything to say about it. I really am sorry you had so much to deal with because of me. So much stuff that I had no idea about. You did it so well, you’ve been so understanding, so good. If it were anybody else, they wouldn’t have lasted a day dealing with me and all of my baggage. But you, you’ve been the answer to all of my prayers”.

His heart catches at your words. Finally, finally he was getting some recognition for all the hell he had been through for you. He gives you a soft smile and a little shrug. “Wasn’t anything I couldn’t handle. I’m glad you didn’t have to deal with it, honestly. Now that I don’t have to worry about you not listening to me about him it makes it all that much more worth it. You’re worth it”.

You roll your eyes but there’s a smile on your face as you say, “and I love you for that” and you don’t know what that little line does to him.

He has to look away when you say that even though he knows you can see the blush quickly taking over his cheeks and feel his heart hammer a little faster over it. It gives him a little courage to try and see if maybe he can get you to say those words to him again, but in the way that he’s been wanting all of these years.  

“You’re gonna kill me, aren’t you?” He mumbles, running a hand over his face.

“What’s that supposed to me, Caufield?” You ask, tilting your head up so that your eyes can search his face.

A look of wonder is on his face as he says “You have no idea do you?”

Now it’s your turn for your heart to speed up as you do have an idea of what he might be about to tell you.

You don’t get the chance to hear what he has to say because you hear yelling from the hall and the voice that it belongs to is Owen. Both of your heads turn as he crashes through your door, breathless.

“Y/N have you seen Brock, I think we have a problem - oh shit, am I interrupting something?”

[alexis-vaughn]

SHIP! + Shane & Alexis

The chaotic ship meme from here

Who is more likely to do some shady stuff for the other? 

Both would but Shane more likely

Which one playfully calls the other a bitch and which one sarcastically calls the other an asshole?

Alex calls him an asshole very often! I think Shane wouldn’t dare to call Alex a bitch cause he knows she hates the prejudices some have about her flirty behavior and therefore call her like that a lot. He would more likely use naughty words during sex and then preferably use “slut” cause it’s more dirty and because she told him it’s okay

Which one is more likely to purposefully act in a way that will make their partner jealous? 

Alex. She needs the reassurance of being adored and that Shane is really scared to lose her again

Who is more petty / passive aggressive when they’re upset?

Alex, she can be a bitch sometimes (sorry baby ♥︎)

Which one is most likely to get into a fight on the other’s behalf

Both would defend the other but Shane more often does it. Alex would rather ignore people who talk bad about him cause they are not worth her time

Which one is the most likely to bail the other out of jail? 

Both would but Alex has the right connections to get him out and wouldn’t end in jail herself 😂

Who is more likely to initiate mischief of any kind? And does the other stand back and watch or try to stop them? 

They both would but Shane would help Alex while she would try to stop him so others stop thinking bad about him

Which one purposefully annoys the other one to see how long it takes for them to snap? 

Shane does it more often cause he likes to test her temper 👀

Which ones gets protective because ‘only I’m allowed to bully you!’ 

Alex is a lot like that. She would freak out when others dare to speak bad about him while he wouldn’t care that much

Who is the one to apologize first when things are pushed too far

Shane, cause he’s more afraid to disappoint her again

Who one ups the other when they proclaim their love? (”no I love you more” “No I love you more.”) 

Shane would do it and Alex would respond “baby you don’t even know what love is” to finish it 😂 and Shane knows she needs and appreciates the reassurance

@wexarethewalkingxdead

[debbiechanclub]

Best Two Out of Three, Part 6

Alright, we’re swapping out the drama for some fluff this part. Alsooo idk if y’all are gonna hate or love me after the end of this one, BUT LET’S FIND OUT. 

Best Two Out of Three

Part: 6/26

Pairing: Adam Page x OFC and Kenny Omega x OFC

Warnings: Alcohol use, language

Word Count: 2.1k

Catch up on previous parts here.

Callie marched to the bar, her empty glass in hand. She needed another drink, stat.

She’d had it with Kenny’s bullshit. They’d never been the best of friends; even before everything with Alex had blown up, she’d always felt like he only tolerated her because she was with Adam. But now? Now it seemed like he wasn’t even trying to hide his disdain, and that didn’t sit well with her. Not with her match against Alex in less than a week.

A loud, obnoxious burst of laughter sounded from across the room, drawing Callie from her thoughts. She looked toward the lounge area; Alex and Kris were playing a game of pool against Cash and Dax, and Kris was laughing as Alex tried to distract Cash from making his shot by leaning suggestively over the table. Callie rolled her eyes. Next Wednesday couldn’t come fast enough.

“Hey, baby.”

Adam came up behind her and placed a hand on the small of her back. She smiled up at him, his touch instantly soothing her. At least they weren’t fighting tonight. “Hey, cowboy.”

“I saw you talking with Kenny,” he said. “Is everything alright?”

Her smile faded. Maybe she’d thought too soon. “Yeah, we were just talking about the match,” she said, trying to brush it off. She wrapped her arms around his waist. “What’s up with you?”

He pulled her closer and nodded toward the terrace. “Come outside with me. I think we could use some alone time.”

She smirked up at him. “Okay. Let me just get another drink.”

The bartender fixed Callie another cocktail and Adam took her hand and led her outside onto the terrace. They moved to a spot that gave them some privacy away from the party. Callie gave him a curious look as they sat down. “What brought this on?”

“I just thought we could talk,” he said. “We haven’t been doing much of that lately.”

Callie frowned when he said that. “Yeah; you’re right,” she regretfully admitted. “Is there something on your mind?”

Adam’s eyebrows arched. “A lot, actually,” he answered with a rueful grin. “But I just think we need to clear the air. Things have been tense between us lately, and I don’t like fighting with you, Cal. I want us to be good again.”

He paused and looked down into his nearly empty glass of whiskey. Callie reached over and took his hand again, interlacing their fingers together. Telling him without words that he could tell her anything. So he did.

“I know this whole situation with Alex has been getting to you, and I know you’re worried that Kenny and I won’t be entirely in your corner next week. And honestly, I can’t speak for Kenny. But I want you to know that I have your back one hundred percent. Okay?”

He looked back at her with those blue eyes of his, and there was no possible way that Callie couldn’t believe him. She felt terrible for ever doubting him in the first place. “I know you will,” she assured. “But if we’re being honest… I honestly don’t think I want Kenny at ringside next week.”

Adam cocked his head at her. “Why not?”

She let out a sigh. “Britt told me that he and Alex used to be… involved. And after everything that’s gone on, I just don’t think I trust him not to interfere.”

Suddenly, Adam tensed. He shifted in his seat. Callie sent him a questioning look. “What?”

He sighed. “Well. There’s something I need to tell you. It’s kind of the reason I wanted to talk.”

Her face fell. But he went on before she could ask.

“In the interest of being honest, a long time ago… Alex and I got drunk and made out.”

Callie’s grip on his hand loosened. “What?”

He couldn’t defend himself fast enough. “That’s all that happened, and it meant absolutely nothing, Callie, I promise. But I felt like I needed to get it out in the open in order for us to move forward.”

For a long, tense moment, Callie didn’t say anything. She was equal parts shocked, angry, and jealous. All this time he’d sworn up and down that he and Alex were absolutely nothing but friends, and the entire time he’d been harboring this secret? She looked back at him, ready to give him a piece of her mind; but when she saw the look on his face, she stopped short. She could tell from the remorse in his eyes that he’d meant every word. “Well, I wish you hadn’t waited to tell me until now… while drunk Alex is inside trying her hardest to sleep with Cash…” she muttered. “But I’m glad you told me. Really.”

“Of course,” he said. “But trust me—that’s not Alex trying her hardest.”

He was smirking. But Callie wasn’t amused. “Is that supposed to make me feel better about what she did with you? Because it doesn’t.”

He let out a laugh. “I’m sorry. That probably wasn’t the best thing to say.”

She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, no shit,” she muttered; but Adam squeezed her hand tighter.

“I don’t want there to be secrets between us, Callie,” he said. “I love you—only you.”

She looked back into his eyes, and once again, Callie felt all her anger and jealousy disappear. Without saying a word, she moved closer and tucked herself underneath his arm. And as hugged her against him, she felt more secure in their relationship than she had in a long time.

* * * * * * * * * *

As the night wore on the party dwindled down and people started to filter out. Trent, James, and Kris had already taken an Uber back to the hotel, but Alex and Chuck had stayed behind; Alex because Mariposa didn’t want the party to end, and Chuck because he was worried what Mariposa might make Alex do. Needless to say, he was relieved when she said goodbye to Cash with little more than a lingering hug.

“Alright, I think it’s time to get you to bed,” Chuck said. Alex grinned up at him.

“How forward of you, Chuckie.”

He rolled his eyes; but she didn’t miss the nervous way the corner of his mouth quirked up. “You know what I mean.”

“I know,” she relented. “And you’re right. Let’s go back to the hotel.”

“Alright,” he said. “Wait here; I gotta step outside to get the Uber. I don’t get any signal in here.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket and jogged out to the terrace. Alex watched him go around the corner of the building before she turned and started toward the bar, intending to get some water; but she stopped short. Kenny was sitting alone in the corner, scrolling through his phone. She thought he’d left hours ago.

She fidgeted, wondering if she should say something. But before she could decide, he looked up and spotted her. “Alex. Hey.”

“Hey,” she echoed. “I didn’t know you were still here.”

He shrugged as he put down his phone. “I wanted to stay and make sure no one did anything stupid.”

An awkward laugh escaped her. “Probably a good idea,” she said.

There was a pregnant pause, neither of them sure what to say next. But then Kenny beckoned her over. “Come sit.”

Alex nervously bit her lip; but she quieted her uncertainty and walked over. She caught the scent of his cologne as she sat down next to him. It smelled just as good as she remembered.

“So,” he started. “I’m glad you and Callie didn’t try to kill each other tonight.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’m done worrying about her bullshit,” she returned. “We have the match next week. That’s all I care about.”

Kenny’s knee brushed against hers as he sat back. Neither of them moved. “Speaking of the match, Callie seems to think I’m going to interfere on your behalf.”

Her brow furrowed as she shot him a look. “What? When did she tell you that?”

“Tonight. But I honestly don’t care. She can believe what she wants.”

Alex looked down at their touching knees. Had she been sober, she probably wouldn’t have asked her next question. But she wasn’t sober—and she wanted to know. “Would you do that?”

Kenny looked over at her. “If things get out of hand… yeah. I would.”

She bit her lip again. Part of her was flattered; but a bigger part of her was annoyed. “I appreciate the concern, Kenny. But I don’t need you to protect me.”

“I know you don’t.”

“Then why do you constantly insist on doing it?”

“Because I care about you, Alex.”

His eyes met hers, and Alex’s breath caught in her throat. She’d forgotten how blue they were—but she hadn’t forgotten the way it made her feel when he looked at her like that. She’d been burying that feeling for a year. But right now, it was impossible to ignore.

He leaned closer. “I care about what happens to you. I care about if you’re happy, or if you’re hurt, or if you’re frustrated. And yeah, I’d care if you were sleeping with someone else. I wanted to kill Cash tonight.”

Alex tilted her face toward his. Maybe her body was only reacting the way it was because of the alcohol, but she didn’t care. She wanted to feel him. “What else do you want to do?”

He glanced at her lips. “I really want to kiss you.”

She inched closer. “Then do it.”

The air was so charged that it felt like they’d get shocked if they touched. But just when Alex thought Kenny would close the space between them, he turned away. “Not like this.”

She pulled back. “Why not?”

“Because.” He reached up and pushed her hair out of her face; she leaned into his touch. “You’re drunk, baby. If you still feel this way tomorrow—and I sincerely hope you do—then we’ll talk.”

She pouted. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, it was probably for the best. “Fine.”

He smiled softly at her. “How about I give you a ride back to the hotel?”

Alex sobered up a bit then. Chuck—she’d forgotten all about him and the Uber. She looked around, but she didn’t see him anywhere. Maybe he was still outside.

“What’s wrong?” Kenny asked.

“Nothing,” she returned. “Let me just go tell Chuck and we can go.”

“Alright,” he nodded. “I’ll wait here.”

Alex stood and moved toward the terrace, nerves tightening her stomach. It was terrible; she already felt guilty for ditching Chuck for Kenny. But she wanted to go with him. She knew she’d regret it if she didn’t.

She pulled the door open and stepped outside just as Chuck rounded the corner of the building. He let out an apologetic huff when he saw her. “Sorry. Fucking James called just as I was trying to get the Uber to ask if we could get him McDonald’s on the way back, and then Trent got on the line wanting to know if you’d left with Cash and he gave me a bunch of shit and yeah. It’s not important. The car’s almost here so we should get our stuff.”

He started to head back inside, but Alex cut him off. She took a deep breath—and then she blurted it out. “Actually, I’m getting a ride with Kenny. Please don’t judge or hate me.”

 Chuck paused, surprised. But if he was upset, she couldn’t tell. His expression didn’t give anything away. “I would never judge or hate you, Alex,” he said. “But are you sure? Did you make this decision or did Mariposa?”

She rolled her eyes. “I did,” she returned. “And yes. I’m sure.”

He ran a hand through his hair as he looked back inside. “Okay,” he breathed. “Just use protection, alright?”

Alex’s cheeks unexpectedly flushed. “Oh my God, I’m not gonna sleep with him; he’s just giving me a ride,” she said. But Chuck didn’t say anything in return; he looked like he was somewhere else. Her brow furrowed. “Is something wrong?”

He snapped back to attention and shook his head. “No. Go ahead—I’ll see you back at the hotel.”

A frown pulled at Alex’s lips. But she nodded. “Okay,” she said. She offered a parting smile and turned to head back inside. And as Chuck watched her disappear through the door, he wished he would have asked her not to go.

[itsjuliak5]

I watched Episodes 6-8 of “Julie and The Phantoms” and I did a little review because I couldn’t help myself.

This is the review I did for Episode 1 and the one I did for Episodes 2-5. Also these are just a streamline of my thoughts as I was watching. It’s not professional or anything, just for fun!

* SPOILERS for Episodes 6-8 of “Julie and The Phantoms” below *

Episode 6

- I read the description for this episode and NOPE. I don’t like Nick.

- Same Flynn.

- “Don’t leave me!” That is me to my friend in gym.

- “I don’t dance!” Kenny we know you directed High School Musical okay?

- This is awkward without music. Shut up, Nick. I hate this.

- Oh, Reggie.

- AWWW!!!

- Fuck off Caleb!

- Flickering? Bitch, the hell is a flicker?

- Tell them off Julie!

- “Remember what today is?” Don’t you dare...

- Oh no. Oh nooooo. Traumatic backstory nooo!

- NO! DON’T SHOW ME SAD LUKE! NOOOO! STOP STOP MAKE IT STOP!!

- I HATE THIS! AHHHHH!!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME??!!?!?!

- My heart is in my ass😭😭

- Carlos is adorable.

- Back off tia! (Although this is kinda funny.)

- Ew Nick, stop it.

- Stop smiling, Alex! They’re the enemy!

- Oh no are they gonna flicker during the performance?

- Is Carrie gonna sabotage this?

- “Julie and The Fat Ones” LOL

- LUKE looking at Julie, help me SOS.

- I LOVE THAT! This song is a bop.

- Oh jeez that look Luke gave Julie at the end.

- Trevor Wilson is gonna sabotage this all again isn’t he?

Overall: 8.4/10

Episode 7

- Reggie helping Carlos. I love this.

- Angry Luke and Alex, adorable I love it!

- I love the Dad and why do I feel like the Dad is gonna recognize the band? 

- When are we gonna get Reggie’s sad backstory?

- AHHHH! Luke visiting Julie at school and saying she makes him a better writer omgg.

- Jealous Luke!

- Yeah you have a crush on Julie, Luke.

- Omg she called Nick, “Luke.”

- OMG OMG OMG! THEY’RE DANCING! I LOVE THIS! THE SONG IS BEAUTIFUL, THE DANCING IS BEAUTIFUL!!! OMGGGG

- RIP: Me

- Odd side note: I love that Julie’s hair is kinda frizzy and not Hollywood perfect because it makes this more realistic. 

- FLYNN STOP IT!

- Reggie spitting facts.

- Luke making Reggie have a bi panic you love to see it.

- “Girls, right?” ~ “No.” I love you Alex🤣

- LOVE the outfit Julie.

- Luke looks cute in a beanie.

- Oh no Julie don’t start trying to be distant now, stop it. Flynn I trusted you, look what you did?

- HELL YEAH look at each other! Screw you Nick!

- I love this omg. 

- Aw Carlos is adorable!

- Oh no. Stop. I mean thank you Willie but...sh*t.

- NO DON’T CROSSOVER YOU BETTER NOT! THEY BETTER NOT!

- The final episode is gonna be them playing at The Orpheum and then disappearing. RIP ME

Overall: 8.8/10

Episode 8

- Oh no, I know this is a really sad episode.

- Go away Nick.

- At least he’s okay right now, but I don’t trust him (Nick).

- Luke is going away soon. CRAP.

- Reggie is living vicariously through Ray, because he never had a good dad(from what little we know about his backstory) and because he’ll never get to be a dad.

- Carlos I love you.

- OH NO, I’m gonna cry aren’t I? (YUP)

- Mitch is such a Dad name.

- Am I gonna see baby Luke?? ~ Sadly no.

- Don’t show me sad Luke, don’t do it😭😭

- Charlie’s voice is amazing.

- Get Bobby/Trevor out of this nice montage.

- Oh no, not the police😭 

- DON’T SHOW ME SAD LUKE

- Well that was sad, but amazing. 10/10 song and acting on everyone’s behalf.

- “Interesting little relationship.” - Stop omg

- Oh no. Damn.

- Omg is Julie’s mom gonna save the ghosts from beyond the grave??

- I don’t want them to crossover😭

Overall: 9.2/10

[kazbrkker]

Chapter 5: The Way It Was

Chapter summary: Fluff and angst. Price finally makes an appearance! First fight between Alexis and Alex and an interesting revelation...;) & glimpse of Alexis’ childhood. [2404 words]

Warnings: Shitty childhood (mention of alcohol & rough childhood.)

26 OCTOBER 2019, 2200 "Alexis" and "Alex", Codename Aces CIA agents with Urzik militia Al-Raab, Urzikstan.

"What was that?"

Alexis stormed forward, harshly jabbing her partner's back. They were taking the scenic walk back to the militia's base. While Farah and Hadir walked ahead of them, Alexis and Alex lagged behind to breath in the scenes of their victory.

"What was what?" Alex perplexed, cheekily plucking a few yellow chrysanthemums off the road and waving it in her face.

Alexis took the tiny flowers, a warm smile on display as she admired the adversity these flowers had to bloom in a place like this. Then it faltered upon realising it was an attempt to distract her. "You radioed Viper for me. That's against the rules."

Alex quickly brushed her off and walked into the militia's armory, Alexis hot on his trail. Standing in silence as they waited for the room to clear. "Since when are you one for following the rules? What, you wanted to personally say bye to him?"

What the hell, that took her by surprise. Where did that come from? "I only follow the rules to keep you out of trouble. Sorry for caring."

The hardened look in Alex's eye softened, "I was doing you a favour, come on! Viper was outrightly hitting on you over the comms. If Laswell wanted to bitch about it, you could get dragged into his mess." He shrugged and busied himself with removing his gear.

"Because minor flirting is worse than trashy comms etiquette?"

Alex stretched obnoxiously loud.

"No, fraternization is." That stung more than it should.

"That's a bit hypocritical, isn't it?" Spurts of anger gnawing at her rationale incited her to spit those words without hesitation —instantly regretting it. From the nostalgic look on Alex's face, he must have realised they were in a loop again. The last time they had this conversation, it didn't end well.

To put this delicately, Alexis and Alex were no strangers at fraternization. It happened one time after she returned from St. Petersburg, a drunken mistake that Alex agreed. Overtaken by choking wave of emotions —vulnerability, lust, the need to feel safe. It was the first time Alexis was desperate enough to ask for something, and Alex gave it to her. Like moths drawn to a flame, lonely agents like themselves, cut off from the rest of the world, take whatever comfort they can get.

They left that night without ever mentioning it again. Only the next drunken time (clearly not a good drinker) when she accidentally mentioned it —her mistake for assuming it meant... more.

Alex assured her it wasn't. It did some serious damage to their friendship for a while. After a few weeks, everything snapped back into the exact same, best friends and partners for life.

Now, leaning against a counter, she searched for any answers in his eyes. One thought crossed her mind —maybe he was jealous...? Impossible, she deserted the thought, Alex had never been the jealous type.

Plus, what happened was a one-time thing. It wouldn't, or rather, couldn't happen again. Alexis couldn't lose him too.

"Maybe." Alex murmured, refusing to meet her eyes, his jaw clenched tight while cleaning his rifle, the chiselled jawline highlighted from his profile. Wide-eyed, the female agent slowly cleared her throat, scattering to form a reply.

Alex's satellite phone rang, breaking the tense silence. Saved by the bell.

Speak of her and she shall appear —it was Laswell.

Alex hesitated, did Laswell really wanted to bitch about it? He was blindly shooting from the hip. The palpable tension dissolved, replaced by a flustered Alexis. His lips pursed in amusement, "Laswell wouldn't. I'm pretty sure she has a soft spot for you."

Alexis was smart, confident, witty, resourceful, strong —the strongest person he knew. Resilience built steadily like a rock, he could write lists after lists. Alex wasn't blind, who wouldn't have a soft spot for this woman.

"This is Bravo 6, Echo 3-1 and Saint, do you copy?" It was Price.

A nudge shook Alex out of his trance. Excited at the appearance of her mentor, Alexis snatched the phone from his grasps. It was a relief to know Price was on the mission too. Looks like this assignment was really bringing her old friends back together.  "Price? Send traffic, Cap."

"Good job, hitting the airbase. Now that you have limited Barkov's air capability, we'll do our part."

"Glad we could help. What's the plan?" Alex replied to his field commander.

"We traced the masterminds of the Piccadilly attack to a townhouse in North London, we'll take care of it. You can put your feet up and rest."

"That is a command I can follow. Have fun, cap." Alexis spoke, ready to end the call.

"Not so fast, young lady. I was at the debrief, I managed to keep you out of trouble. If it was up to Norris, you'd be running laps like Viper. Don't get stupid, Alexis."

Alexis exhaled frustratedly. "Thanks, Cap." She replied in between scowls in response to the burning triumph look from Alex. His hands covering his mouth to muffle his wide smile. By taking his side, Price had inflated his ego unnecessarily bigger.

"But, you still have to run 5 miles for your insolence towards Laswell." Price delivered the ultimatum.

Her jaw slacked. "You're joking. Says Norris?"

"Colonel Norris." Price corrected with a sigh. "Says me. I told you one day that mouth of yours is going to get you in trouble. 5 miles. Alex?"

Alex exploded into laughters, no longer trying to suppress it. "Hah, roger that! I'll make sure of it. Out."

The call ended. Alexis had respect for authorities, to a certain extent. It wasn't impertinence, but rather her conditioned nature to bypass it. Coming from Task Force Black —a tier-one task force in the JSOC that didn't even answer to the President, falling into the chain of commands was never needed. Also might have to do with the fact that she started to detest the political bureaucracy over the years in the CIA.

John Price, Daniel Maddox —Alexis' commander in Task Force Black, and Samuel Forbes —her CIA handler were the only ones she would willingly abide. Kate Laswell was also close.

"Is this a bro code thing?" Alexis motioned in between them and the satellite phone, inspecting Alex as he raised his eyebrows in feigned innocence. "Price doing the dirty work on your behalf?"

"You heard the man, he said it was for your insolence."

"Wipe that smirk off your face." She mumbled, trying to use a dirty cloth to wipe his chin but he stopped her. If looks could kill... you know the rest.

"Let's go, babe. I'll time you."

"Aw. How kind." She retorted, thinking how badly she wanted to dig those blue eyes out from that arrogant face of his.

40 minutes later, a very sweaty and out-of-breath Alexis returned to the starting point. "5 miles... 5 god damn miles." She breathed, catching a towel and water bottle tossed her way. The entire 40 minutes was filled with killer glances towards Alex. They both knew the punishment wasn't for her insolence. Price wasn't the type to demand respect for other officers, the man could care less and so could Laswell.

This was an indirect way to lecture her, the brotherhood they had caused Price to take Alex's side. Judging from the glowing delight, this ought to satisfy him. Her punishment attracted a few audiences, including Hadir and Farah, who watched happily with her enemy on the roof.

"40 minutes on the dot. Impressive." Farah shouted from above. Hadir excitedly nodded, showing thumbs-ups.

Past the fourth mile, even her vision started to swirl. Blame the ever humid Urzikstan, it was insane she completed it without hurling. "I don't want to impress... I need a seat!" So she willingly fell on her butt and sat in the middle of the carpark.

They joined her shortly, grinning at her flushed cheeks and breathless words. Farah extended a hand and pulled the CIA agent up, "Steady now. Alex, why did you make her run so much!" She chided, elbowing him.

"Not me. It was Price."

"Keep lying, I'll harvest your toes." Farah gave a weird look at her insult. "All I have to do is look Price in the eye and he's a goner." Alex remained suspiciously silent, but yelped when Farah jabbed him in the gut. As revenge, Alexis smacked her sweaty towel against his tattooed arm, disgusted as he failed to swat it away.

Farah, who supported her to walk, didn't seem to care about her sweaty state. "Farah."

The commander hummed, bringing her inside the kitchen to sit. Hadir refilled her bottle.

"Would you like it if Alex and I trained your people? We can teach them some proper fighting tactics and medic courses. With your permission, of course."

Farah took a seat opposite her, mouth opening slightly before closing, as if she was unsure what to say. Hadir, witnessing this, said with a smile, "That would be extremely kind, Alexis."

A bright glint that could be interrupted as a tear reflected in the commander's eyes. Farah's hand squeezed hers tightly. Eyes crinkling upwards, Alexis knew that was her way of saying thanks.

"Great. We start tomorrow."

The two siblings soon left Alexis and Alex in the kitchen to unload some trucks that just entered the compound. He replaced Farah on the seat, "That is a great idea, Lexi."

Finally, some wind started blowing into the kitchen. She closed her eyes at the relieving night breeze. After today's mission, seeing how Farah's people fearlessly ran into the battlefield was reason enough to help them. Although a good trait, fearlessness can also be dangerous. "I want to help them. We were trained by the best in the world, it would be cruel not to share some of that knowledge."

They sat in silence, feeling the cool air while quenching their thirst. Putting their feet up, as Price ordered. Outside the kitchen, playful insults were thrown around by the pair of siblings. It was heartwarming, seeing genuine smiles and watching them be... normal. It was nice.

Growing up, Alexis wouldn't complain she had a bad childhood. Her dad was an honest man, a construction worker. For a man with such a harsh job, it translated into his personality. Her father wasn't affectionate, but he played a good father by putting a roof over their heads and food on the table.

Her life was normal, up till the very day her mother got into a fatal car accident, then everything changed. It was never said but Alexis knew her father blamed her for it. She only grew up to realise it was ridiculous. How could it have been her fault? But grief knew no sense.

Life waited for no one, years later, her father remarried. Lily was a great stepmother, not conforming to the stereotypical evil stepmom Alexis was so afraid of. Lily loved her, but not as much as her blood-borns.

Loved her, but not enough to stop the drunk shoutings, that much Alexis understood.

Alexis didn't remember much of her mother, only recognizing her face through photos. They looked nothing alike —her mother was blonde and had bright blue eyes, while Alexis inherited dark brown eyes and hair. For a man who held an imperative amount of self-loathing, imagine raising his reflection.

She envied the pair of siblings, even after everything, they still had each other. Seeing them together somehow felt lonelier. Emptier.

"I can hear the gears turning." Alex placed his chin on her shoulder, the action bringing her back down on Earth. She sniffled inconspicuously, pretending to use the damp towel to wipe her sweat. "What's wrong?"

"Why must something be wrong?"

"You're making that face."

Friends for five years, it would be foolish to assume something could escape his eyes. Goosebumps raised over her arms, feeling the stubble on his chin tickling her skin. She turned to examine the man who had been through everything with her. Hell and back, literally.

Alexis didn't know how she could ever live without him.

"Just reminiscing." She replied, a distant look in her eyes while she continued smiling at the siblings' bickering. Alex followed her gaze, knowing.

"The past is the past, Alexa–" Alex almost uttered her birth name but stopped in the nick of time. "Sorry, it slipped." His voice was muffled by Alexis' hand.

"You get my point. What matters is the now, and now you have me."

"I'll always have you." She recited, hands intertwined.

The usual smirk on Alex's face was replaced with a heartfelt smile, their gaze connected meaningfully. "And I, you." He laid a gentle kiss on the top of her hand.

Alexis and Alex stayed like that for a few more minutes, her head resting on his shoulder. Suddenly, a sound pierced through the peace —it came from Alex's stomach. Alexis laughed before tossing him her rations pack.

"Uh-huh. No. You two are not eating that." Farah walked in to snatch the rations away. Their mouths fell open, watching their favourite ration pack out of their reach.

"Hey! That was shrimp fried rice, proper good stuff!"

"Closest to gourmet." Alex backed her up. It was the tastiest ration pack. Alexis even secretly raided the base's stockpile to neat pick the most decent ones —there goes her efforts.

Farah tossed the unopened pack to Hadir, who caught it with ease and wiggled it higher when Alexis tried to reach for it. "You cannot win this war with... that." Hadir inspected it, face twisted with distasteful when he opened it, revealing an unappealing mash of rice compressed into a box.

Farah tugged on her wrist, already pulling her down the stairs. "If you don't throw it away, I will tell Captain Price about your horrible English accent.

Alexis groaned, "If this war wouldn't kill me, Price would."

"Better yet, he'll make you run the miles for real."

Her lips parted with a gasp, pointing accusingly as Farah continued to drag her down the stairs. "So you admit it was you!"

"Come." Hadir pulled away the agent who tried to jump Alex with a punch.

"We will show you the real gourmet."

taglist: @flyboidameron​

a/n: it was my birthday yesterday so i decided we need this fluff.... it's so 🥰. masterlist here. want to be tagged? let me know!

[joysmercer]

I’m not going anywhere (except home with you)

Summary:

Canon-Divergence from 16x09 and Onwards: Alex gets rehired after Meredith’s trial. When he comes back from visiting his mom, he and Jo run into some old colleagues and friends, which leads them to make a life-altering decision.

(Or, Alex and Jo get the send-off they deserve.)

Read on Ao3

_______________________

For the third week in a row, Jo Karev has absolutely nothing to do. Technically, she’s supposed to be furthering her targeted-drug-delivery research, but that’s hard to do when all of the cell colonies in your control group inexplicably turn purple. Jo prods the petri dish with a pipet one last time before she decides that it’s time to go find something else to do.

She just finishes locking the door to the lab when she’s nearly knocked over by someone in light-blue scrubs carrying a giant stack of case-files and running straight at her.

“Hey, Parker, you haven’t seen Bailey, have you?” Jo calls after him.

Casey skids to a stop and turns around, nearly dropping the files in the process. “Nope, but I think she’s about to scrub in for a Whipple,” he says.

Jo nods. “Thanks. Do you need me to carry some of those for you?” Normally, she wouldn’t be so free to offer help, but there isn’t anything else that she can occupy her time with at the moment.

“Oh no, that’s fine. Dr. Hunt and I are working on our old Innovation Contest entry; it’s kind of top secret. I should probably take these to him myself.”

“Why is everyone doing something cool except for me?” Jo groans, momentarily forgetting that the resident is still there.

“I mean, I could ask Hunt if we can add another person—” Casey offers.

“Huh? Oh no, no, that’s okay,” Jo says quickly before she starts walking down the hall, lost in her own thoughts. The fact that she’s jealous of a resident is not a good thing. Perhaps Bailey will let her assist on the surgery.

Suddenly, Jo feels someone’s arms wrap around her waist and pull her backward. She squeals and whirls around, and her hands reflexively form fists in preparation to punch whoever’s touching her square in the jaw—that is, until she spots a familiar face grinning at her. “Alex! I thought you were flying back tomorrow!” she exclaims.

“Mmm, I know, but I couldn’t be away from my beautiful wife for that long,” Alex replies bending down to kiss her gently. “But also, I got called in for an emergency surgery that’s happening in three hours.”

“Hey, you don’t happen to need an assist today, do you? I’m bored out of my mind.”

“Unfortunately, no. It’s a fetal surgery—remember Margaret Peterson? My CHAOS patient?—so I’ll be the assist. The surgeon should be here soon.”

Jo looks confused. “Link mentioned that Dr. Montgomery is coming, but I thought it was for—”

“Amelia’s delivery, yeah, I know. I asked her if she could come earlier, but she couldn’t take any more time off from her practice.” Alex rolls his eyes as the doors of the elevator ahead of them open. He raises his voice slightly, a smirk playing on his lips, and continues, “So instead of the number-one fetal surgeon in the country, I’m now stuck with—”

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence, Karev,” a familiar voice admonishes. A few seconds later, Arizona Robbins steps off the elevator and runs up to them. She gives Jo a quick hug before stepping back and turning toward Alex.

“Marriage looks good on you,” she pronounces. “As does, if my sources are correct, a brief stint at the worst hospital in the state?”

Alex blushes and Jo feels a pang of embarrassment on his behalf. “As does becoming Chief of Surgery and completely revamping what was formerly the worst hospital in the state into a Level 2 Trauma Center,” she corrects.

Arizona smiles and nods. “Precisely. I’m proud of you, Alex. Now come on, let’s go look at our patient. We have a lot to catch up on.” And with that, the two of them walk off, leaving Jo by herself. Again.

 _______________________ 

“Thank you for coming in on such short notice,” Alex says quietly as he and Arizona take the trauma elevator up to Peds. “I know you’re pretty busy these days in New York.”

“Oh, no worries. Anything to help out a friend.” Arizona smiles. “So tell me, what have you been up to since you got back from Pac-North? Did you manage to bring your Africa Project back? I know you were thinking about doing that.”

Luckily, they reach the patient’s room before Alex is forced to come up with a response that doesn’t sound completely boring. He holds the door open for Arizona and follows her inside.

“Hi Ms. Peterson, I’m Arizona Robbins. I’ll be performing your fetal surgery today, with Dr. Karev as the assist.” Arizona gestures vaguely in his direction, and Alex nods.

“Do you have any questions before we start prepping you?” he asks, but Arizona has already pulled up a 3-D model of the human body on her tablet. She launches into a detailed explanation of the surgery they’re going to perform, using her fingers to enlarge and shrink parts of the model accordingly. Alex watches her in awe.

Afterward, as they walk to the OR, Alex asks if the procedure has changed since the last time he saw her perform it. “I could have sworn it was much longer,” he explains.

“Yeah, we devised a new method, maybe, six months ago? This way is not only less time-consuming, but it's also much safer for both mom and baby. Actually, most of it is based on another paper that came out last year from UMich. Did you not read it?”

Alex shrugs and nods, his head buzzing. He hadn’t even heard of such a paper. There was so much he didn’t know.

 _______________________ 

“Hey, can I get some help with these?”

Wondering if she’s somehow been demoted from surgical fellow to bellboy, Jo turns around and finds herself face-to-face with none other than Callie Torres, who is currently juggling three suitcases, two laptop bags, and a cardboard box.

“Wilson! Look at you!” Callie exclaims before Jo even properly registers her presence. “How are you doing?”

“It’s, uh, Karev, now,” Jo informs her, holding up her wedding ring. “I wasn’t sure if I should change it, but in the end, I felt like—”

“Oh, I totally get it. My wife and I had a huge debate about it, too, and we just decided to hyphenate,” Callie says, handing Jo a suitcase and a laptop bag to carry. “I can’t believe she insisted on bringing all this luggage and then left me in the parking lot with it so she could rush up here for her consult.”

Jo nearly drops the bags in surprise. “Wait, you and…?”

“Oh, Arizona didn’t tell you? We tied the knot again a few months ago. Sophia’s over-the-moon, of course, and, well, so are we.” Callie smiles and looks around the lobby. “It’s so good to be back here. I’ve missed this place.”

“And we’ve missed you,” Jo replies. “I’m taking a break right now, actually; if you want, we can drop these off at the Attendings’ lounge and go catch a cup of coffee?”

Callie nods and they set off to the lounge. Jo’s grabbing her wallet out of her bag when Link walks in, looking unusually happy.

“What are you all smiley about?” Jo asks him. “Is it because of Amelia’s ultrasound this morning?”

Link shakes his head. “I mean, yeah, when Amelia’s happy, I’m happy. But a patient just came into the ER with the gnarliest looking—” Suddenly, his eyes drift over Jo’s shoulder and he gasps. “Calliope Torres! What are you doing here?”

Callie, who was tying her shoe in the corner, looks up with an equal amount of surprise on her face. “Arizona’s doing a consult for Karev! What are you doing here?”

“Wait, you two know each other?” Jo asks. “How?”

“We met at an Ortho conference, what, two years ago?” Link says. “And our hospitals in New York were next to each other.”

“I didn’t know you were applying to the Chief position here,” Callie says. “I’d have put in a good word for you. After all, it was my job you were trying to get.”

“Well, I’m here now, aren’t I?” Link laughs. “Hey, do you guys want to see something cool? It’s a patient with this fracture that—”

Before Jo realizes what’s happening, the other two doctors are walking out of the lounge, deep in discussion. She follows two steps behind them, struggling to make sense of the medical jargon that sounds only slightly familiar to her now.

 _______________________

“So, you never got to tell me, How’s the Peds department doing without my help?” Arizona grins. They’re in the OR now, and she’s manipulating the instruments while Alex watches the screen above them.

“Just trying to get it back on track, really. It’s been a tumultuous year for the hospital. Watch the scope.”

Arizona adjusts accordingly. “I imagine it hasn’t been easy, especially since the insurance debacle.” She looks at him knowingly. “I don’t know whether I should yell at you or hug you.”

“Believe me, Bailey’s already yelled at me enough for a lifetime.” Alex rolls his eyes. “But you’re right. I want to further the research that I started for the Surgical Innovation contest, but—” he sighs. “It’s been hard.”

Alex was expecting at least a sympathetic glance, but Arizona barely reacts. A heavy silence surrounds them as she guides the instruments through a particularly difficult part of the procedure.

He clears his throat and shifts uncomfortably. “Um, actually, I was wondering if you had any advice or anything? I mean, if you don’t that’s—”

“Alex Karev, remember what I told you a few years ago? If you’re ever in trouble, you come to me.” Arizona pauses purses her lips thoughtfully. “Your history isn’t really helping you, but I really do think that you’re due for a change. Have you considered pursuing a fellowship?”

“That’s a huge time commitment, and I don’t even know what I’ll do it in, anyway. I don’t want cardio or colorectal, and I spend enough time in the ER already; I don’t need to spend time doing trauma.”

“You could always try Fetal,” Arizona murmurs. “You have a leg up on most people, ‘cause you’ve assisted on quite a few already. Forceps.”

Alex hands them to her and shakes his head. “Jo and I are—well, we’re thinking about kids, and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to make that work. No offense, but your marriage kind of fell apart when you did it.”

“You’re forgetting that I completed a two-year fellowship in six months, and Callie and I were having problems before then, too. Plus, if you come to the Robbins-Herman Center, you won’t be bogged down by admin or all the other stuff you have to do here.”

Alex shrugs again, and Arizona laughs. “I’m only kidding about the fellowship, but just think about everything else, alright? You don’t want to be stuck at the same level forever. Maybe ask Bailey if you could take on some more responsibility here, otherwise.”

Alex doesn’t have the heart to tell her that the chances of that happening are slim.

 _______________________

 “You don’t see something like that every day,” Callie comments as Jo follows her and Link out of the Pit. “I would have killed to have a case like that as a fellow,” she adds and glances at Jo. “Although I don’t think I would trust my fellow with anything as complex.”

“Actually, I would. Mine is an actual Ortho Prodigy,” Link grins cheekily.

Callie rolls her eyes, but then her expression inexplicably softens. “I always knew Jo had it in her.”

Jo blushes. “Oh, actually, I’m not his—I was actually thinking about Peds, and then I got into a really cool Minimally Invasive Surgery program at Mass Gen, but I ended up doing a Surgical Innovation fellowship with Dr. Bailey,” she explains hurriedly.

“I didn’t know that was a thing.”

“It’s research, mostly. Lots of literature review, too. It’s more behind-the-scenes than in the OR.” Jo hears a hint of annoyance in her own voice as she speaks, but she can’t be bothered to stop it.

“Oh.” Callie briefly looks dejected, and Jo’s heart breaks a little. She hates disappointing her mentor. “Well, listen, it’s going to be a huge hassle for you to apply for the Match for Ortho, but if you ever get bored with, uh, what you’re doing, just shoot me an email. We’ll always have a spot open for you.”

Jo’s jaw drops. “Wait, you mean—”

“As my fellow. If you want it, of course.”

Jo’s sorely tempted, especially given how stagnant her current job is, but she needs to talk to Alex, first. “I do miss the thrill of it all,” she admits.

Callie smiles.

 _______________________ 

Jo bumps into Alex on her way back to Lounge, but he’s so lost in thought that he doesn’t even see her until she waves a hand in front of his face.

“Oh, hey,” he murmurs, giving her a quick peck on the lips.

“What were you thinking about? Oh no, was your surgery okay?” Jo asks worriedly.

“Yeah, it was fine.” Alex shifts his legs uncomfortably. “The weirdest thing just happened, though. Arizona thinks I need a change of pace, like a fellowship or moving hospitals or something.”

“No way, she offered you one too?” Jo gasps, then winces. This wasn’t how she was planning on telling him about what Callie said.

“Well, yeah, but I—wait, what did you just say?”

“Callie was kind of upset I didn’t go into Ortho. She said she’ll always have a spot open for me in her department.”

“In New York?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you considering it?” Alex stares at her, and for once in her life, Jo can’t tell what he’s thinking.

She shrugs. “It’s an idea. It’s not like I’m doing anything important here. But that’s crazy, right?”

“Absolutely. But—I don’t know, it would also be kind of cool. Maybe you should at least think about it?” Alex shrugs, but Jo sees a glimmer of something—hope?—in his eyes.

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, seriously.”

Jo smiles and breathes a sigh of relief. “Listen, why don’t we go home and discuss it?”

Alex nods, and she reaches across, takes his hand, and they walk to the elevator.

 _______________________

A few weeks later, Alex walks in from work to find Jo sitting at their tiny dining table with a laptop, a tablet, two calculators, and three piles of printed-out spreadsheets in front of her. He has a vivid flashback to a similar scene many years ago, featuring an exasperated Jo shoving a stack of student-loan debts in his hand, and smiles to himself.

He gently moves one of the piles and places the plastic bag he’s carrying in its place, and it’s only then that Jo looks up at him. “Hey,” she mumbles sleepily, rubbing her eyes with one hand and reaching for the bag with the other.

Alex swats her hand away. “They’re donuts. Let me make dinner first.”

Jo frowns, but Alex suspects that she hasn’t had anything to eat all day—except for half a bagel she stole out of her hand that morning—and he’s not about to let his wife live off of sugar. “What are you doing?” he asks instead.

“Just double-checking all the numbers and paperwork,” Jo sighs. “Making sure everything’s in order for tomorrow.” She looks up at him. “And that we’re making the right decision.”

“Jo—”

“No, Alex, look. We wouldn’t even be considering this if Callie didn’t dangle an Ortho fellowship at me like that, and yeah, it would be amazing to work under her again, especially since she has this new robotic limbs project that—” she catches the note of excitement entering her voice just a second after Alex does, and sobers up—“the point is, it’s a huge change for you too. And I could always do a fellowship here as well.”

“New York has some of the best Peds programs in the world, and Arizona pulled some strings so I’m both Deputy Chief and Head of their Pro-Bono Surgery Program, so even if I wanted to, I can’t drop out now.”

Jo nods but still looks skeptical. “I know all that, but still—”

“Sure, I’m sad to leave Seattle, but Mer has her sisters to be with her now, and New York’s closer to where my mom and Amber are. Besides, Bailey’s always said I’m destined for greater things besides Grey-Sloan.” Alex smiles in what he hopes is in a reassuring manner.

Jo laughs. “I saw she put you down for that conjoined-twins surgery this morning. She appears to have forgiven you. I would have hated it if you left on bad terms.”

“And you know what another plus-point is? Our new apartment has more than one room, and Callie says that the district we’re moving to has some of the best schools in the state,” Alex continues eagerly, and then blushes. “I mean, it may be a few years off still, but—”

“I’d much rather take our kid to Central Park on the weekends instead of that place around the corner,” Jo finishes.

Alex walks around the table and wraps his arms around her. “I love you.”

“Mmm, I love you too,” Jo murmurs, leaning up and pressing her lips against his. Alex moves to deepen the kiss, but she pushes him away.

“We’re leaving tomorrow morning, and you still have six boxes to pack. Move!”

 _______________________

Their new apartment has two floors and a balcony, complete with a giant kitchen and a living room significantly larger than the entirety of their old flat. Their first child is born eight months after they move in (“wow, we were really happy, huh,” Alex comments when Jo shows him the positive test, earning him a whack on the shoulder) and they adopt their second through their local Safe Haven program soon after.

Alex makes it a point to FaceTime Meredith every Wednesday and Friday morning (Tuesdays and Thursdays were always Cristina’s days, and Mondays are for all three of them). He chooses not to pursue a fellowship, but Arizona’s advice at the back of his mind motivates him to win his first Harper Avery within two years and his second three years after that. He stays in touch with Webber and Bailey, and several graduating GSMH residents come to him every year for their fellowships. Once he’s made Chief of General Surgery, his hospital is the first in the nation to fully integrate the teaching practices of HRCWH into their surgical residency from day one.

Jo completes her Ortho fellowship in a record-breaking six months (although Callie isn’t surprised whatsoever). She immediately gets funding for her own prosthetics lab associated with Alex’s hospital, and the ground-breaking research she produces gets published multiple times; whenever a journal approaches her for an article, she obliges without hesitation and immediately sends them a write-up and a fresh headshot. Despite how busy she is, she makes it a point to spend as much time as she can in the OR perfecting surgical techniques, training residents, and inspiring countless female surgeons to pursue Orthopedics.

Occasionally, Jo asks Alex if he has any regrets. “With moving here?” he asks. “In general,” she replies. Every single time, he shakes his head no.

_______________________

_______________________

End Notes:

Thank you guys for reading!

Title is a quote from the show. The "'Seriously?' 'Yeah, seriously'" exchange is blatantly taken from the Brooklyn Nine-Nine episode "Manhunter."

When I first started writing this, Link was going to play a much larger role and there were going to be actual conversations between Jo & Link/Alex & Meredith/Alex & Bailey…so just pretend all of that happened behind-the-scenes.

One point of clarification: I decided to have Alex not take on the Fetal fellowship because he has never expressed an interest in doing something like that on the show, and it was more important to me that Jo pursue Ortho.

Whether you liked this or not, I sincerely hope it was at least better than the monstrosity the Grey's writers chose to go with. Do let me know what you think;  you can this fic on ao3 as well.

[skyfallensoldier]

@quillborn​ said: ❛ i can’t help but find it interesting,❜ alexander murmurs late one afternoon, leaning back against the wall with a keen, level gaze. the house is empty besides them, something which would usually serve to make him pleased, but now only furthers his disdain. it has only been two days since they had taken ella in, and alexander has not said much at all, though he had not yet directed any malice outwards, either. ❛ that for someone who claims they weren’t in love with their wife and did not want a child with her, you seem so particularly invested in keeping her with you. ❜ violet eyes narrow ; there is a familiar tone creeping in to alexander’s voice, a familiar sort of jealous bitterness that john would not be well-acquainted with, having only heard it when his estranged wife and child were spoken of, and john had learned better than to mention them around alexander. ❛ i suppose that must just be another one of your half-truths. really, i should start to anticipate them. ❜

a pause, and then alexander shakes his head, makes his way over to the doorframe. ❛ you have made your past mistakes my problem, something you assured me would not be the case. do not look to me for pity : this is a cage of your own making, and one i will not help you solve. ❜ fingers trail the edges of his waistcoat, and alexander is trembling. ❛ i will be staying at the office tonight. there is work i need to complete. don’t bother staying up for me.❜

            It hurt, and he couldn’t deny it.

            The fact that Alexander seemed to have completely shut down on John, ever since Ella had come to live with them... before that, even; he’d tried to speak to the younger male about the girl, and her mother’s passing, but his lover did not seem inclined to listen to it. It fucking hurt and there was no getting around it; the rejection, the cold, clipped answers, the fact Alexander could no longer seem to stand being in his presence. He’d wanted to include him in his decision, but the other simply had no desire to take part in any conversation that had to do with John’s estranged wife. More than anything, he’d wanted advice, for there was no one else whose opinion he held higher in regard than his most cherished friend. He wanted someone to tell him, for once, what the right decision was. What should he do? What would Alexander have done in his shoes? Should he let his sister raise her? Should he send her away to a full time boarding school that would see to her proper care? The only thing he knew was that it had to be his choice to make; she was his responsibility, whether he was prepared to make choices on behalf of her dead mother or not. 

            He was not, and he likely never would be.

            In the end, despite Eliza’s attempt at support, and despite writing to several other friends to ask for their input, the decision had fallen solely upon John’s shoulders. It wasn’t easy, to decide to have her brought to America. John didn’t know the first thing about being a father; the burden of caring for his siblings had been naturally expected of him as the eldest, but this? This was the result of a stupid, stupid thing he had done, a moment of weakness when he was confused and in pain and the self-loathing and anguish had been too much. Martha had been there, and at that point in his life, he hadn’t cared whose arms were around him, he just wanted to feel like somebody cared. But Ella was innocent, and she didn’t deserve to suffer for his weakness. She had no control over the circumstances of her conception. That was exactly what he was trying to tell Alexander, that this wasn’t done to hurt him in any way, but out of a sense of moral obligation.

            “ Alexander, please. I... what did you want me to do? Let her grow up thinking I hated her so much I couldn’t even bother to meet her once? Leave her to feel abandoned and unwanted? Send her to a convent? Leave her to the streets? She’s a child. She never asked to be born. ”  John tried to swallow down the torrent of emotion threatening to overwhelm him; he needed to keep a level head.  “ I’m not looking for pity, but perhaps just a sliver of understanding wouldn’t go amiss. I tried to involve you in this decision, you wouldn’t even listen to what I had to say. You ignored me, as you always do when you’re angry. Pretend I don’t exist until the situation resolves itself. How many times do I have to apologize before you understand that my past doesn’t exist solely to spite you? ” 

            At the term half-truths, John flinched.  “ This again? Mon amour, please. It’s been six years. One detail of my life I kept to myself, when we were only just beginning to know each other, when I was unable to accept what I was and clung to an illusion - you would still hold that against me? It was the worst time of my life, I didn’t want to acknowledge that year even happened, let alone discuss it with the man I loved. ”  He pointed out, his voice a little uneven as he did his best not to go back to that place, the anxiety weighing heavy in his chest. So much had happened that year. Francis. Martha. Jemmy’s death. His downwards spiral that nearly cost him his life. Even now, he could barely talk about it without a sense of overwhelming panic and helplessness overcoming him. He stepped forward and grasped the younger man’s wrist, pulling the redhead in an effort to make him face John.

            “ Can’t you tell me what I can do to earn your forgiveness? I’m begging you, Alex, love. Let me in. For once just tell me what you’re thinking without my having to guess. ”  He pleaded, cupping Alexander’s face to search his eyes for something, anything that would tell him how he could somehow fix what was wrong.  “ I can’t erase what has already happened. Martha is gone. I hadn’t seen her in nearly seven years. I’m with you. I love you. This is my home and you are my family... isn’t that enough? ”  he whispered, sea green eyes shining with unshed tears. “ ...Do you still love me? Or have I broken this completely? ” He swallowed hard, glancing down at the younger man’s hands, his gaze darting back up in concern, his own pain momentarily forgotten. “ Alex, my dear, you’re shaking... ”