#i have a few more i need to finish up on akira but. its been a while since i offered anything here..................

[toestalucia]

anyway does anyone want a lil ask or two<3 if u want a specific setting/verse/timeline/etc feel free to say so, otherwise i got this:] if u want any of my other muses thats great too

[tinyperson00]

Maybe your sisters are right - Akira & Toju fanfic - fluffy and lovey :3

Hopefully this fulfills your need for more Toju x Akira @moshi-moshh :D

Akira and Katsu are sitting together with their sister Ushuu who came over to see her sisters since Shinobu said she could get a break for a few days. The three of them are enjoying a delicious dinner that Ushuu made for them as a gift for letting her stay for a few days. Toju has been out on a solo mission for the past 3 and a half days now. Akira knows that some missions can take a long time, tho she is worried for him since hes never been out for this long.

Akira's younger sisters are having a little conversation while she is just zoned out in her own thoughts. "Akira...?" Katsu says to her

"huh? Oh what were you saying, sorry about that. Haha." She responds back jokingly to her sister, who is very observant.

"Toju will be fine.. you dont need to worry! Hes strong, trained by you after all." She gives Akira a confident smile as she says this and Ushuu pats her on the shoulder.

"I think its cute~" Ushuu smirks "someone has a crush doesn't sheee."

Katsu just looks at Akira, then at Ushuu, then back at Akira. "You really don't tell people things do you.." katsu jokes

Ushuu looks confused and curious now as she sits back down and looks between her two older sisters.

"She's kissed him like 5 times now that ive seen.. probably more times that I dont known of as welll." Katsu explains to her. She looks at Akira now, "When are you two gonna just get over yourselves and date already??"

Akira's face is red now, and she has no words. Ushuu, who is enjoying this new drama and information on her sister, looks at Akira with a deep and mischievous smile.

suddenly, the front door is open from the other room. Akira is up and over to the door in an instant. Ushuu is impressed by her speed and looks at Katsu to continue to talk. An injured Toju is now walking into the mansion to be greeted by a relieved Akira. She looks him up and down to examine his injuries. A few minor cuts along his arm, and what looks to be bruised ribs. She can tell that he has a bandage around his torso as well, probably got cut there. She smiles up at him and welcomes him back, congratulating him on completing his mission successfully.

she grabs his arm and walks him into the kitchen to get Ushuu to help treat his injuries. "Ushuu, your assistance is required."

Ushuu gets up and goes with Akira and Toju into the room used for treatment and such. Katsu is left to clean up after dinner and then goes up to her room for a while. They arrive in the room and Ushuu prepares some treatment for Toju. Akira helps him remove this shirt and undershirt so he isn't hurting his arm to much and irritating his cuts. She was right, he has a slash mark across part of his side that is wrapped in a bandage. Ushuu helps replace his bandage and properly treats the wound. She then wraps up his arm and treats that.

"the bruised rib will heal with time, just make sure Akira takes it easy on you with training for a while until your better." She explains to him and Akira.

they finish up in the treatment room, and Akira asks him all about his mission. He fought very well, and managed to save everyone in the village with minor casualties. It was a pretty strong demon, but not part of the 12 moons.

"Im proud of you Toju, you did really well." She smiles up to him.

they are both sitting in the living room of her mansion, and she is leaning her head on his uninjured arm.

He looks down to meet her loving gaze, "I couldn't have done it without your help, you really are an amazing mentor you know."

she gives him a small laugh and leans up closer on him. They are very familiar to eachothers touch, with training and everything they've been through, so this wasn't a super surprising situation for him. After all, he has been her tsuguko for about 5 months now. Toju looks down at Akira who is now curled up next to him and still leaning her head on his arm, and he wraps the arm around her shoulder to pull her in closer. Akira now goes a bit red, and thinks back to what Katsu was saying during dinner.. what exactly is it that is holding them back from getting together again..? She honestly cant think of an answer to this and then looks up at him. Akira compliments Toju once more on how good he did during his mission, then she begins to act on emotion again. Now she is reaching her hand up to his face and pulls his head down until it almost reaches hers. Toju catches on very easily and then follows with her. Ushuu and Katsu just happen to be walking into the room to join them as their lips meet and form a kiss.

"aaand thats 6." Katsu says sarcastically

Ushuu laughs and says "you werent kidding Katsu!"

Akira slowly releases the kiss and turns her head to look up at them with slight annoyance on her face. Toju doesn't bother to move and just continues to sit the way he was before.

"are you sure they aren't dating yet Katsu??" Ushuu jokes to her sisters. Both of Akira's sisters are now laughing at her and Toju in a sisterly way.

Akira just stares at them and gives them the middle finger for a second and then turns back around again. This has the two laughing even more now as they go sit down next to them.

The night arrives now and they begin to get ready to go to bed. Akira's mansion has 5 bedrooms in total. One for her, one for Katsu, one for Ushuu when she comes over on nights like these, a guest room that is being occupied by Toju, and a big bedroom with 3 single beds for guests. The last room is almost never in use, but she keeps it fresh just in case. While Toju is getting changed into his sleep clothes, he starts to wonder himself why him and Akira aren't dating yet as well. He can't think of a reason why they can't either, and he knows Akira is very strong so he won't have to worry about loosing her. Toju decides to talk to Akira about it later that night, and Akira was planning to do the same thing.

Akira is saying goodnight to her two little sisters as Toju walks out of his room. She shuts Ushuu's door now and begins to walk back to her room. As she walks past Toju, she hesitates since she wants to talk to him about it, but then decides not to right now and then continues walking to the end of the hall to get to her room. Toju watches her now and realizes that she's been thinking the same thing he is, and decides that now is a good time to talk to her. Just as Akira is about to walk into her room.. she feels Toju grab her torso and pull her into a hug. She looks up at him now with curiosity and confusion.

"Are you alright Toju..?" She asks him softly.

"You hesitated when you walked past me.. yoj have something you wanna say dont you?" He explains to her. "i have something I wanna talk about as well actually."

"oh you do? I guess you're right as well, I do have something I wanna ask. You can go first tho."

she turns herself to face him now and looks up at him. "You look pretty tired Toju, you should sit down before you fall over from exhaustion."

Toju agrees and follows her into her room and sits down on the bed with her. Akira leans against him again and then asks what it was he wanted to talk about.

"well... I.. Maybe I think your sisters are right.." he says with a soft voice.

Akira knows exactly what he's talking about, and is happy he's saying this, but Akira being Akira.. she wants to hear him say it so she plays it dumb. "Right about what exactly..?"

Toju's face now begins to go red. He looks away a bit and then says to her "I would like to date you.. but only as long as that is alright with you of course."

now with a smirk, "Toju, don't look away from me when your talking. You know I feel the same way." She pulls him to face her again.

He gives her a gentle kiss then says, "then I would like that."

Its pretty late by now and the exhausted Toju suddenly falls asleep and his head plops down to fall on Akira's head. She laughs quietly to herself as she carefully lays him down in her bed next to her and she lays down as well. About 10 minutes pass and she suddenly feels his arms wrap around her like a hug. She smiles to herself and closes her eyes, now comforted by his hold. They stay like this for the rest of the night. Not even the crows had the heart to wake them up the next morning.

Katsu walks in to see them, gasps to herself, and then runs back out to get Ushuu. The two girls find this absolutely adorable and just stare at them. Not long after, Akira can feel their gaze and looks up at them with a sleepy scowl. She starts to get up to shoo them away, but they close the door and run away before she gets the chance. Toju subconsciously pulls on Akira wanting her back down to lay with him for a while longer. She goes back down and falls back into her light sleep once more.

-end-

Did that satisfy your need for a fanfic @moshi-moshh 🤭

this was actually so cute to write lol-

definitely wasnt almost falling asleep the entire time.. definitelyyy

only once picture this time since im exhausted and had a lot to do today but I hope you enjoyed reading this :D Ignore the spelling mistakes I probably made ;-;

time for bed now~ nighty night 💗

[weloveakechi]

As Dreamers Do Chapter 6

At last, Goro gets to do some investigating! And meet up with some characters we haven’t seen yet!

Content warning for this chapter it does include two scenes of implied/referenced suicide. Those take place just after Goro finishes speaking with Yoshizawa, and right after he’s done talking with Ryuji and Akira (the second scene is the last in the chapter). Please take care when reading.

First Chapter | AO3 Link

~

“Thank you so much for being willing to let me come ask some questions.” Goro’s best television smile is firmly in place as he shakes the hand of Principal Kobayakawa, head of Shujin academy in his office. It’s a few days after his conversation with Kurusu and Sakamoto and he’s finally managed to get a meeting set up. 

Kobayakawa’s smile is as false as Goro’s, if for a different reason. Goro is here investigating, while the principal just wants to get Goro to join the school, “It’s not everyday we have interest from one of Japan’s finest! I can’t quite believe it myself, the next Detective Prince, interested in our school!” 

Goro’s chuckle is light, disarming, “You have quite the reputation. Even the students at my current school can’t stop talking about Shujin’s volleyball team.” 

The lies fall easily, smooth as butter. Feigning interest in the school is the quickest way for him to get his foot in the door, ask a variety of questions, and make his presence known without causing too much of a stir.

This is the kind of situation he needs to be delicate about. He can’t just burst in demanding answers about the rumored abuse the school's star coach is inflicting on his students. That would get him nowhere. Especially if the teachers and Principal are on his side the way the others believe. 

“I’d love to see the gym, and even sit in on one of Mr. Kamoshida’s training sessions. I have to admit, I’m a bit of a fan.” His tone is just on the side of shyly interested to help make the lie more believable.

He knows he’s succeeded as soon as Kobayakawa nods, a wide smile on his face, it makes him look almost like a frog, “He is quite the player. We just knew hiring him would take our volleyball team to the top.” He checks something on his computer, “It looks like the team is in the middle of practice, why don’t I walk you over now? Then I’ll have one of our teachers give you the full tour. If you’d like, we’d love to have you sit in on a class or two.”

“I’d be delighted.” 

There’s little special about the gym itself when Goro finally sees it. Not that Goro thought there’d be anything particularly unique about the location. It’s only been recently that they’ve started to shine in the world of sports. The only team that had ever really done notably well was the track team until Kamoshida was hired, since then the spotlight switched to volleyball, and the track team was dismantled. Learning that, and who was on it, gave Goro quite a bit of insight into Sakamoto’s reasons for being so focused on the man. Another victim in a long line of them, but one at least trying to do something about it.  

As a school, Shujin is a good option for potential students. They turn out a higher than average graduation and acceptance rate to good colleges than many in their distinction. His research told him that students from Shujin often go on to be rather successful, which is another point in its favor. In fact, it’s a school Goro would have seriously considered in the past. 

That said, some further digging indicated that despite their good standing, the school’s had a slight downward tick in graduations over the past couple years. It’s nothing too detrimental presently, but if not corrected will end up hurting the school’s reputation. 

It’s surely why Kobayakawa has pushed so hard to put the school in the news, from hiring a gold medalist coach, to pushing a new honors student, and even taking in a troubled teen to give him a second chance. None of that solves the actual problem of failing grades or better providing for their teachers. 

It does however, make complete sense as to why they’d turn a blind eye to Kamoshida’s blatant abuse of students. 

The man in question is in the middle of shouting orders as they step into the gym. Facing away from them, he’s too busy pointing out flaws in various team members’ performances to notice the two people who have walked in. 

“Umm, Coach–” One of the boys says.

“I said start again.” Kamoshida snaps, “Stop wasting time.” 

Principal Kobayakawa clears his throat, “Excuse me.” He finally announces them. 

Kamoshida turns on them, the annoyance on his face instantly wiping away as he catches sight of the visitors, “Principal Kobayakawa, what a surprise. Who is this with you?” 

“This is Goro Akechi, he’s touring the school today as a potential transfer student.”

“Another one, huh.” Kamoshida says lightly, as he puts a hand out, “Looking to join the volleyball team?”

Goro takes it, Kamoshida’s grip on his hand is firm, almost too much so.

“I’ve heard so much about the team I had to take a look.” 

Kamoshida laughs —a self assured sound if Goro’s ever heard one— before he leans over with a wink, “You don’t have to say it, I can read it all over your face, you’re a fan. Good to see you here. You’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like and observe.”

“We were going to do a more comprehensive tour after this.” The principal hedges, a little hesitant. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll have one of the team escort him back your way when we’re done. That way he can get his full tour.” Kamoshida waves off his concern.

“Well, if you’re sure.” Kobayakawa turns to Goro, “I’ll leave you in Mr. Kamoshida’s capable hands. By the time you get back I’ll have a teacher lined up to walk you around.” 

Goro gets little from the practice. Kamoshida’s on his best behavior with a stranger in the room, even if he doesn’t seem to realize just who Goro is. Some of the students do though, he catches a number of eyes lingering on him through the practice. 

Even with no major hiccups, it’s not wasted time to be there. In fact, Goro’s done exactly what he set out to do: be seen by the volleyball students. If they want an opportunity to tell someone about their coach, he’s making himself as available as possible. 

One of the girls volunteers to take him back to the front office, and after a nod from Kamoshida sidles up to Goro with a shy smile to take him back. 

It turns out that no teachers are readily available to tour him around the school, a fact Goro could have told him before he’d left. Really, how someone so completely inept has stayed in Shido’s good graces so long baffles him. 

Instead of a teacher, he called in one of the student council members. The president in fact. 

Goro can’t help but shoot Sae Niijima’s little sister, Makoto, a wicked grin as she steps into the office. 

“Hello, Niijima-san.” He gives her a little wave, deeply amused by this turn of events. 

He won’t call what he has with Makoto Niijima a rivalry. It’s not that. But it isn’t nothing either. They pick at each other, prodding for weak spots, and viciously tug when they find one. It started as him teasing her a bit when she got jealous of how much time he spent with her sister, and over the years it’s evolved. If he were feeling gracious, he might label it almost akin to being siblings vying for a parents favor, with Sae-san as the parent. 

“Akechi?” In her surprise she drops her normal insistence on honorifics. 

Kobayakawa looks from one to the other before he nods, “Good, good. You both are already acquainted. I’d appreciate it if you’d continue Akechi-san’s tour of the school for me.” 

“Tour, sir?” 

Goro gives her a blinding grin, “I’m considering transferring here. My current school is being difficult regarding my schedule and workload as a detective. As I’d like to graduate, and continue working, I’m looking for options more amenable to my lifestyle.”

“I see.” She narrows her eyes in a way that screams doubt, but she can’t call him on the blatant lie here in front of Kobayakawa. Instead she matches his smile, all teeth and sarcasm, “Let’s get started.”

The moment they’re out of the office, with the door closed securely, Makoto spins on him, hands already on her hips, “Now tell me, what you’re actually doing here.” 

He goes for the lie again, giving her a wide look as if to say ‘what are you talking about?’, “I told you, I’m observing the school as a potential transfer option. I’ve heard great things, and the overall caliber of student is–”

She throws up a hand, interrupting him, “It doesn’t make sense to switch in your last year.” Her interruption is refreshing. That’s something he likes about Makoto. No matter what good girl act she puts on for the rest of the world, she’s got a mean streak hiding, and he loves pulling back the cover to make it show. 

“There’s obviously something else going on. Tell me, maybe I can help.”

He considers it. While she’s not on the team most impacted by Kamoshida, she is the Student Council President. She has clout with students, and might have already heard something. Still, it’s a little early to bring her into the investigation. 

So he holds up a finger to his lips, winking, “I’m conducting an investigation. It’s still early, but I’ll be sure to consult you if the need arises.” 

This seems to appease her somewhat, “Does my sister know about this?” 

“No. I have yet to bring in either the prosecutor’s office or police. Students reached out to me about the issue, and until I have more I’d rather not complicate things.”

That gives her pause, enough that she stops in the hallway to glare at him. Her eyes flash, a theory developing about his investigation. Before she can press further, another voice cuts in. 

“Akechi-sempai?” 

They turn and find a first year student, hair bright red and pulled back into a ponytail that swings as she walks. She’s stepping out of an office, and heads towards them, face alight with recognition. 

“Yoshizawa-san.” Goro greets, giving her a softer smile than he’d given Makoto, “I didn’t realize you attended Shujin.” 

“Oh! Yes.” She perks up, “I just started on an Honors Scholarship.” Ah, so she’s the new honors student, he should have guessed.

They aren’t close. Goro knows Sumire Yoshizawa only in passing really. He’d met her and her sister through her father, and they’ve spent a little time stuck together on sets. Her there to visit with her father, Goro for shooting. There’s a lot of time between takes or news segments, and when there’s so few people in the whole building even close to the same age to talk to? You chat. 

This Yoshizawa is in stark contrast to the one he’d seen recently. That girl couldn’t look Goro in the eyes, voice distant and broken, body curled in on itself like she was trying to disappear. It had been so similar to how he remembers looking the few times he’d let himself look at the mirror after his mother’s death, it had sent him reeling. 

Experience tells him she shouldn’t look this good. Shouldn’t sound so normal. He doesn’t wish that kind of grief on her, but he knows better. 

“It’s nice to meet you. I’m Makoto Nijima, the student council president.” Makoto holds out a hand for Yoshizawa to take, “If you need anything at all, Yoshizawa-san please feel free to reach out. Starting at a new school can be difficult, especially with all the expectations heaped on an honors student. I’m always happy to lend an ear if you need it.”

The other girl bows, hair swinging over her shoulder as she does so, “I’m honored, Nijima-sempai. Thank you so much!” 

When she straightens, she tilts her head at Goro and asks, “Excuse me for asking, but why are you here, Akechi-sempai?” 

“I’m also considering transferring to Shujin. Nijima-san has been gracious enough to give me a tour.” He tells her.

Yoshizawa clasps her hands together, face bright and delighted, “That would be wonderful, Senpai! I’d love it if someone I know also attends here. It will be such a great opportunity to get to know each other better.”

“How do you two know each other?” Makoto asks, her tone more pointed than curious. 

“We met at the tv station my father owns. Akechi-senpai has been interviewed a few times there.” She turns back to him, “You have another coming up soon, right?” 

He nods, “I have to send in my approval for the questions this evening.” He rubs the back of his neck, “It can be quite a lot sometimes. I’m grateful for your father’s support.” 

“I think he’s taken a liking to you.” Yoshizawa says, clapping her hands together. 

The false modesty got him what he’d wanted to hear, “I’m glad to hear it. I’m sorry to take up so much of your time, it has been wonderful to see you.” 

“Likewise. Even if you don’t transfer to Shujin, we should talk more. Maybe I’ll see you at the interview?” Yoshizawa asks.

“Perhaps.” Is all he allows. 

They have only barely started the real tour when the hallway begins to flood with students. Doors crash open, and shouts echo around the once quiet halls as students and teachers alike fly out of classrooms and down the hall. 

“Did you hear? She jumped.”

“I hope she’s okay.”

“What are we going to do?” 

Makoto’s eyes flash and she grabs a student by the arm, yanking him back, “Who jumped? Where?”

The boy shoves a finger in the direction of the wave of students, “Some volleyball girl. Out there, by the courtyard.” 

It is chaos, but both Goro and Makoto make it through the throng of students and teachers, pushing and elbowing their way to the courtyard. The noise is on the verge of being overwhelming. Goro’s stomach is clenched in a way that promises he’ll be sick if he stops to think about the girl’s actions too long. 

He hasn’t worked a suicide case in his entier career as a high school detective. 

He tried only one time.  

“Move please. I’m on the student council.” Makoto says, trying to push through the wall of people in the courtyard. But they’re not budging, rooted to the ground as they play witness to the tragedy before them. 

“Out of the way.” Goro snaps, the anger in his words clear and authoritative enough to send the students in front of them scrambling. Good. It’s obscene to stand around and watch something like this. The teachers should be doing a better job getting students back into their classrooms. Unless, the lot of them. 

He ignores the sudden flare up of whispers about police and detectives as students begin to recognize him. If anything, he’ll use his fame in his favor if he needs to in order to quell the chaos a bit. For now, his focus is the girl. 

He makes himself a shield to push Makoto through the crowd, along with himself until they drop into an open area, ringed by shocked students. A teacher, perhaps even a nurse, is kneeling by the fallen girl. Her hair is a different color from the one who took him to the office, which for some reason is a relief to him.

“Everyone take a few steps back.” He starts snapping orders, whirling on the crowd, “Open up a path for the paramedics to get through. Time is of the essence. You don’t want to be at fault for delaying help arriving.”

The whispers of his fame have done their work, weaving their way through enough of the crowd his words penetrate the awed spectacle of it all and has the crowd moving to follow his directions. A further explanation of his job as a detective gains him the allyship of a few teachers, and soon he’s managed to get the crowd under control. 

As Goro works the crowd, he looks everywhere but the fallen girl. Guilt pools in his stomach like acid, bubbling and sharp. He’s certain he won’t sleep tonight. 

His eyes catch on Kurusu and Sakamoto in the crowd. Sakamoto’s shock is clean on his face, along with outrage. Kurusu on the other hand is shattered, grief etched across his features in a way that Goro doesn’t think he’s ever seen before. Like he’s to blame for all this. Before he has time to gnaw on that particular piece of information, his attention is dragged aside again.

“Akechi, could you give us a hand?” 

The next hour feels indeterminately long. He keeps busy making sure the girl, Shiho, and her friend, Ann, make it into the ambulance. He takes statements, and has to shoot down Principal Kobayakawa’s attempts at interference. Nothing will save the school’s reputation in his eyes now. 

Not that it’s ever really mattered. The investigation is his main goal, and he hates how things have turned out so far. Goro might be willing to do a good many things that paint him as irredeemable, but that doesn’t mean he wants to see an innocent girl pushed to her limit like this by someone like Kamoshida. 

The temptation to pull out his phone and use it to take him to the Metaverse where he can put a bullet between the eyes of Kamoshida’s Shadow is all too strong. The man deserves worse than that. Goro wants to take him apart piece by piece and listen to his screams as he begs for mercy. He can feel Loki humm at the thought, agreeing wholeheartedly. 

He realizes he’s got his phone in his palm, as he turns it over and over, the device slipping easily against the smooth leather of his glove. It makes a little swishing noise as it moves. He wants to leave it face up, to wake up the screen and tap the MetaNav, the others had told him the keywords already, all he has to do is enter them. 

He can feel Loki agreeing with the sentiment, buzzing and burning with the need to destroy. To step into Kamoshida’s life and turn it upside down. 

A message buzzes through, stopping him from making any rash decisions.

Kurusu: Meet us in the courtyard by the vending machines.

Goro: On my way.

When he finds Kurusu and Sakamoto, the blond is pacing between a bench and vending machine, steps so loud Goro can hear them at a distance. He can hear the swearing whirlwind Sakamoto is whipping up as well. The boy has some truly creative expletives. 

Sakamoto storms over to him the moment Goro’s close enough to be noticed, “We have to do something now!” He looks about a second away from shoving Goro, “I can’t let that monster hurt anyone else.”  

Goro holds his hands out, trying to placate him, “Calm down.” 

Sakamoto spins and slams his fist into one of the poles by them, metal ringing out with a hollow echo, “Ain’t no way I’m gonna calm down! If we had any doubts about going and changing his heart they’re all gone now. You get that right?” 

“I do.” He says it as soothing as possible, tone gentle, understanding, “However, you agreed I could investigate him first.” 

“And you spent all day doing that right? That’s why you were wandering around campus?” He drops his hand, and steps back towards Goro, “Well? Did you come up with anything concrete to nail that bastard?” 

Goro’s lips press into a hard line, he knows what he’s about to say isn’t going to go over well. 

“These things take time. I started—”

Sakamoto explodes, “We don’t have time for that! That’s what I’ve been saying this whole time! He’s hurting people, Akechi. Are you so heartless you’ll let that happen?!”

“You are very much wrong if you believe I do not care about his victims.” Goro’s voice has dropped to something dangerously quiet, “I did not become a detective for the fame. I did it to stop men like him from abusing their power and hurting more people. Imply I do not care again, Sakamoto and I will prove to you just how much I do.” 

The other boy takes a few involuntary steps back, swallowing, “Sorry, dude. I know you do, you wouldn’t be tryin’ to help us if not. I’m just—” His face is red, hands balled into fists by his side, shaking, “We couldn’t do anything! Feeling so powerless effin’ sucks, especially when we have the power we need to force that scumbag to admit to all his crimes!”

Throughout their exchange, Kurusu has been surprisingly quiet. Goro turns his attention on the other boy, examining him with a close eye. He looks lost, gaze distant, somewhere far beyond them, the courtyard, and probably even the present. 

“Kurusu?” Goro asks, “I understand what happened was shocking. If you need a moment—”

Even Sakamoto seems to pick up on Kurusu’s mood now, but has a different answer for it, “I think he’s also shocked about Kamoshida’s threat earlier.”

“What?” Goro snaps. 

The other boy swallows, “Akira and I went to confront Kamoshida about what happened.”

Goro wants to throttle him, “A decidedly stupid idea.” 

Sakamoto ignores his bottled fury, plowing forward with the explanation, “Us and Mishima. He’s on the volleyball team. Said Kamoshida called Shiho to his office this morning. Apparently she came out lookin’ white as a ghost.”

Goro can only imagine what kind of conversation might have taken place to drive the girl to attempt what she did today. He desperately wishes it had only stayed a conversation. 

“That asshole all but confessed to abusing her and the others when we confronted him about it. Only we don’t have any proof so the creep decided to report us for assault at the next board meeting to get us all expelled. Akira here is on parole, if he’s expelled for something like that? That’s it for him.”

Parole? Goro takes that bit of information and tucks it away. It’ll make searching Kurusu’s history all the easier for him when he finally carves out a single second to actually do the thing. It makes a strange sort of sense, considering the sudden transfer and Kurusu’s caginess around it all. 

Through the explanation, Kurusu hasn’t moved at all. Goro’s kept half an eye on him, even while fuming over the idiotic decision to confront Kamoshida. Looking a little closer now, it’s not shock on his face, but fury. Burning behind those gray eyes, a flame that won’t be snuffed. 

Kurusu moves at last, squaring his shoulders and setting his jaw in a way that promises a fight if Goro dares argue even a moment, “I’m sorry Akechi, but we’re going to change Kamoshida’s heart.” 

His tone isn’t sorry at all. It’s everything Goro has seen on his face and more. There’s no changing the resolve that has settled over the other boy, or his own need to see justice met at his own hands. Goro can understand that. He wishes he can change his mind, stop them all going down this path. Doing this will make things harder in the long run.

But he can’t say he’s not looking forward to facing Kamoshida’s Shadow and carving into him with his own two hands.  

“I understand.” Goro nods, and Kurusu looks shocked, eyes going wide like he was ready to fight Goro tooth and nail on this. 

Kurusu’s face relaxes into something thankful, “Good. Good, let’s go.”

“Tomorrow.” Goro insists, “You’re exhausted and emotional. Going in like this will only cause problems.”

Kurusu opens his mouth to argue and closes it again with a sigh, “Okay, tomorrow then.”

But he doesn’t have time to linger on it, Sakamoto and Morgana are already discussing a meeting time and location for the next day and Goro steps in to indicate that he should be able to meet at the school again. 

Then, after they’ve settled on a time and place to meet. After he’s lingered long enough to make sure Kurusu actually leaves for home. After he tells the principal he’ll be back for a further investigation. That’s when Goro goes home. 

That’s when he falls apart. 

The shaking starts in his hands as he closes the door to the apartment. Fingers slipping on the lock as he attempts to turn it. It’s moved to his shoulders and back by the time he makes it through the living area towards his bedroom, and the attached bathroom. 

By the time he reaches the bathroom his whole body is shaking. 

He shakes and shudders as he drops to his knees and retches directly into the toilet. It’s mostly bial that comes up. He hasn’t had anything to eat today beyond an apple snatched at the station on his way to the school. He forgot a proper breakfast, and hasn’t been hungry since Shiho —that’s her name, that’s who he saw today collapsed on the ground, barely breathing— since she jumped. He’d hardly had any time to help her. 

The retching doesn’t stop even after his stomach has emptied itself. Goro can’t stop it. Every time he thinks he’s done, he can’t help but see her again. Her dark hair, body crumpled, unmoving. It’s the girl until it stops being her.

It’s her until it’s his mother. 

He flinches away from the shower curtain hanging beside him. Behind it, he knows what he’ll find. Tub full, water a murky pink as his mother —his mother— he retches again, chest heaving, stomach trying to turn itself inside out as he dry heaves, over and over and over again. His throat is raw. Tears stream from his eyes from the effort of it all. 

At last, his stomach stills long enough for him to sit up a bit. As he does so he watches a tear slip from his eyes to hit the edge of the toilet, leaving a shining drop on the porcelain. Sweat beads at his forehead, and his chest hurts so bad he feels like he’s broken a rib, or pulled something. Blindly he reaches for the toilet paper and rips off a wad, rubbing first at his eyes and then his mouth. 

He balls it up in his fist and leans back against the wall, chest heaving. Goro drags his knees up to his chest, and lets his head drop between them as sobs rattle his chest. 

[persona5butitsincorrect]

thoughts on shuharu/headcanons?

Its not my personal favourite ship for either of them but it's definitely my favorite for Akira/Ren/whatever you wanna call him x any of the other female phantom thieves. I mean to me she was the only one who seemed like she already liked him during her confidant in the game and they do look pretty cute together as well as seem to have a matching temprement. I also feel like I can acc see a future for them as (at least as for what I imagine for Ren) running or working in a small cafe like Leblanc would suit him. As for what I imagine they'd be like in a relationship here's a couple headcannons of mine:

Lots of coffee dates, Haru would make a point of wanting to discover new obscure restaurants and cafes, and of course Ren will follow suit. Not that he doesn't enjoy it mind.

Mans whipped (😏) and pretty much owns it.

In all seriousness, it's more like he enjoys seeing her doing things that make her happy, since he knows she wasn't for so long.

When it's his turn to decide what that do on dates/days out, it's usually movies or the arcades. They're both surprisingly nuts for horror. And the part timer working at the theatre in shibuya knows their faces by now and always seems slightly afraid.

Same goes for anyone in the arcades, naturally, Haru calls out the most horrendous sadistic stuff like in mementos while they play first person shooters. It's like she forgets she's in public sometimes. Ren finds seeing peoples shocked faces pretty funny.

When Ren moves back home Haru winds up coming to visit for a majority of the summer. Out in the country, she stands out like a sore thumb even more than in Tokyo. She hadn't not been in a city before and seemed to imagine it being a lot more different than it actually is.

His parents though mostly absent are incredibly confused by her sudden surprise arrival in a chauffer, with four suitcases of clothes (she knew she was staying quite a while). Especially as they'd never even heard of her.

Ren hadn't brought her up mainly because they didn't need to know, just like they hadn't bothered to call once when he was in Tokyo, he hadn't bothered to say anything.

Honestly, Ren had very few friends at home, even less after everything that happened. And the people who did still hang around seemed to have an issue with Haru. In general she has this level of unintentional classism-- she just kind of forgets certain things are a luxury and not everyday. And it seemed to be the main thing that was putting people off tho her. It really annoyed him but he didn't really know what to do about it except from distance himself.

It was all making him really regret moving home. So much so he wound up making plans for how he'd move back to Tokyo after finishing his 3rd year of high-school and what he'd actually do with himself once he did. Plans Haru and Makoto helped him draw up.

He, like Haru, wants to run some kind of small private run cafe. Sojiro is mentoring them both. They're heavily considering the possibility of going in on the buisness venture together but it's still very much early days.

Both of them have a keen interest in French literature. Which is part of what got them both talking to eachother outside of the group in the first place. They exchange annotated books a lot - haru using purple post it's and Ren using red.

After her "Relationship" with Sugimura, Haru isn't all that comfortable with physical affection. She especially hates feeling vulnerable. It's a very slow process for her to feel secure again. Luckily Ren is very aware of that and incredibly patient. Partly because he feels the exact same way. After being caught in Sae's palace, battered and dosed up, losing his autonomy and feeling out of control. It all bore on his mental wellbeing a lot. That understanding between them is part of what makes them feel safe around eachother.

Ren has a pretty hard time getting to sleep. He thinks maybe a part of him is Afraid he'll wind up in the velvet room again. Most of the time Haru tries to stay awake with him or offer to stay up so he feels less alone and in danger. But 99% of the time she winds up conking out, of course only after half an hour as incoherent slurred talking whilst she denies she's even tired.

In line with all this, Haru still has moments where she gets incredibly upset or distressed and isn't sure how to communicate it. The way Ren chooses to respond is to give her physical space but stay with her. A majority of the time they don't talk and he just sits by her, letting her come to him if she wants/needs anything (usually a hug once she's calmed down).

There's a lot of hand holding between them. If there sat idly somewhere haru tends to grab Rens hand and trace it's edges with her finger out of boredom.

She's definitely a snorer. But it's a cute snore. Like a little toot noise every so often. That actually does help Ren sleep.

Whilst he already has a pretty good sense of fashion. Harus always wanting to dress him up, and a majority of the time he let's her.

One time Ann suggested she should try and get him to wear a dress, not expecting the fact he was more than happy to. Even more so he pulled it off with way more confidence than anything any of them had ever seen. (Ryuji discovered something about himself that day)

When there together they have this peaceful quiet sometimes, both of them enjoy just stopping and listening to the world around them (which cannot be said for some of their other friends). As well as this they have this way of being able to communicate without words. When they're in group settings it drives everyone else insane trying to figure out what the difference is between their different stares at one another mean and how they developed such a language.

[detektyv]

finished hibiki.... erm my thots..

its definitely deeply flawed. but i cant lie i enjoyed all of it (yes including the second half) im not gonna really speak much about the negatives that i feel like everyone always mentions with this show..(asumus and akiras plotlines) id just be repeating the same things other people say. THO i need to say ill just ignore most of kiriyas existence..like this is probably the most insufferable character i have ever come across and this is coming from a guy who LOVES annoying guys. he doesnt have like any redeeming things about him so why are we rewarding him at the end there with how things turn out.. it literally makes no sense. personally i think he could have been introduced just to add some drama to asumus school life but thats it speaking of drama.. the first half definitely lacks it and thats one of my personal issues with it. everyones super nice and gets along perfectly well and if theres a few small issues they all get over it within the same episode because they all have amazing communication skills. MAYBE YOU COULD WRITE A SHOW WHERE EVERYONES NICE.. but i just found it incredibly suprising in a rider show and like..idk ig it just didnt really work for me personally? because everyone was so nice i felt like none of the characters really stood out ? sorry for loving drama and miscommunication plotlines tbh.. and honestly it was only really in the second half i really started to like ibuki a lot more. and todoroki definitely grew on me more as well and it was all because of the comedy. i do wish ibuki got more focus in general. i loooved zanki and todorokis relationship and just wish inoue didnt always have to push the female characters away in favor of his yaoi. but he got me invested in them..im sorry women.. clearly asumu and hibikis relationship was meant to be the highlight and unfortunetly things dont reallyyy go that way (but they were super cute in the first half and i loved them a lot) general storyline wise did i know what the fuck was going on? absolutely not. none of the writers made it clear what the hell was up with the douji and hime so that ending was just..whatever. erm but yeah even through all my complaining and all my confusion ..somehow i still really enjoyed the show like i would still put this in the middle-ish -higher end(?) of my kr ranking lol..like idk i ended up really enjoying the cast and just spending time with them, i really liked the three main riders and i defintely didnt find all the plots plain bad. the suits are sexy and i love the general concept and theme so.. and hibiki himself is kinda my goat being an older rider and all that ..we need more riders aged 30+

[aeoki]

Primavera - Prologue

Location: Shadowy Road Characters: Touri, Yuzuru, Eichi & Wataru Season: Spring Writer: Seitarou Kino & Akira

< April. After the opening of the new ES performance venue. >

Touri: Wow, the cherry blossoms are gorgeous~♪

Look at the cherry blossom petals! It really feels like spring is here ♪

Yuzuru: Hehe. I remember you were also quite excited last year in the Yumenosaki courtyard. It’s been a year since you started high school… Time flies too quickly.

The opening performance with “Trickstar” was a huge success as well. I wonder what sort of exciting things will await us at ES in the future.

Wataru: It is indeed an Amazing turn of events! My heart was also thumping and pounding. I'm reminded of the trouble Eichi went through to draw this map…☆

Eichi: I feel a bit embarrassed hearing you praise me again. But it’s an enormous industry – I’m not the only one attributed to the realisation of this “ES Project”.

The reason why the project was achieved within a year was all thanks to Suou-kun, who took responsibility on behalf of the Suou family, and Saegusa-kun, who convinced the owners of the land.

Yuzuru: Hmm… would he lend a hand in a project from Eichi-sama out of goodwill? I feel as though he may be hiding something.

Eichi: Hehe. You might be a bit too wary of him, Yuzuru. He wouldn’t lend a finger if it didn’t benefit him in some way.

Both our interests coincided this time. Saegusa-kun turned the tables on the error the CosPro higher-ups made during “SS” and it seems there’s been quite a change of structure and turnover of staff.

Yuzuru: A turnover of staff… you say?

Eichi: Yeah. CosPro is a soon-to-be idol agency powerhouse. In exchange for clearing out the parasites, they’ve lost a few connections to the entertainment industry in the process.

ES is a coalition of agencies so its establishment must have been a bolt out of the blue, seeing as how Saegusa-kun has now lost his business connections. Thanks to him, the project had finished much earlier than I'd expected.

Wataru: It truly is your magic. Amazing! You must continue to show me even more of that magic if you don’t wish to bore me…♪

For example… Oh, it’s “dango over flowers” at times like these! Would you like one as well, Himegimi?

Touri: Woah!? A dango appeared out of my pocket!?

Wataru: Hehehe. Surprised you, no? There’s a little trick to this~ I shall guide you with this three-coloured dango in the mix ♪

Touri: No. I don’t need it. …It’s dirty!

Wataru: I’ve paid special attention to the hygiene, you know~? It may seem as though it’s been directly taken out of your pocket…

Oh, I was very close to revealing my tricks there.

Touri: It’s not about the hygiene but how I feel about it! Geez and there I was, thinking how ES was so impressive.

Anyway… it’s amazing to see how many facilities there are just for idols. I’d love to see the four of us in “fine” fly to even greater heights.

Wataru: Now that we’ve already overcome the event by the name of graduation, we need a new stage.

A stage capable of garnering even more attention than before – I’m getting excited just imagining it ♪

Don’t you think so too, Mr Butler?

Yuzuru: I shall accompany you all.

It is my duty to grant the Young Master’s wish, after all.

Wataru: Hehehe. I share the same sentiment, Mr Butler.

I shall recreate the picture you have all drawn the way you wish.

That is the aspiration of I, Wataru Hibiki…☆

Eichi: Based on your reactions to this, I’m truly glad the “ES Project” progressed as it did.

There will surely be happiness and difficulties that we’ve never experienced before waiting for us.

But it would be wonderful if we could say with pride a few years later that despite that, we chose to continue being idols.

The many seeds I sown in Yumenosaki will flower and blossom from now on.

The god of wind that heralds the arrival of spring – in other words – this ES will let the country, no, let the entire world know that a myriad of flowers have come into blossom.

Let us sing and dance resplendently – Just like how the goddess of spring once did.

A new history of idols will be born from ES.

You’ll all follow behind me, won’t you?

< That day, my dream had truly become a reality. >

< The “ES Project” progressed smoothly and despite encountering a few obstacles in the process, it became a stepping stone as well as sustenance for growth, and those things made it possible to create an even stronger foundation. >

< However, we would be faced with an unexpected headwind, as if it was something the god of wind conspired against us. >

Next Chapter →

[oopsallfanfic]

Chapter 16: Sofubo

The days following Hamamoto Chinami’s death were a mix of vulture-like grief counselors and funeral directors. You understood they were doing their jobs but their pushiness irritated you. To add to your sad and confused mind, #2 Hero Endeavor was responsible for handling the villain that was apprehended. The fire-type quirk user was a poor match for the earth type but took him down nonetheless, leaving carnage in their wake. How the situation was handled infuriated you and confused you more about the field you were intending to enter in a few months. The Endeavor team took no responsibility for the dozen people hurt or killed in such a careless fight, and there was nothing legally your father could do about it. Akira knew the rules heroes had to follow but Endeavor’s team of lawyers kept their side airtight. 

It would be three days before either of you could face anyone who came by, save for the delivery person when they brought food. Your father lifted your punishment and encouraged you to seek comfort in friends but you’d been ignoring their texts and calls for days. He was out now organizing funeral arrangements, while you elected to stay home on account of ‘bad weather’. Hamamoto Akira encouraged you to invite Hanai over or see about having Chiyo spend some time there. You reluctantly agreed to reach out to your friends but couldn’t bring yourself to do it. Not until you got a message from Chiyo.

Chiyo: I’m coming over now and you can’t stop me.

Chiyo: I don’t care how long it takes me to get there, I’ll walk if I have to.

You: Ur writing in full sentences

Chiyo: I need you to know I’m serious.

You: Fine. Can’t stop you if your mind is set.

Chiyo: Really?

Chiyo: It’s okay?

Chiyo: I hadn’t packed yet just in case

You: You made me think you were at a bus station already

Chiyo: I can be, give me 15 minutes and I’ll be on the way.

Chiyo: Oh, besides the train is much faster. I can be there in like an hour.

You: Are you coming then? I should tell my dad

Chiyo: Yee

You: Alright

It felt like the two of you hadn’t talked in ages. With the end of the school year wrapping up, you were sure she was just as busy as you were finishing exams and papers. Not to mention her breakup with Kazuki. He had forgotten Chiyo’s birthday which resulted in an argument that he couldn’t recover from. Chiyo told you he gave a bogus excuse that when she followed up on it turned out to be a lie. Chiyo elected to dump him instead of resolving the issue, you couldn’t entirely blame her though.

With a friend on the way, you decided to clean up your room. Even before the depressive hole you found yourself in, the bedroom was already in a state of catastrophe. You started by opening the patio sliding door to air out the room, cold wind rushing in to replace the stuffy stale air. Trash found its way into the bin, and sheets were tucked neatly around the mattress. Lastly, dirty wrinkled clothing found its way into your laundry basket which you took downstairs to wash. After loading the clothing you stepped out to hear a soft knock at the door followed by the doorbell. It had only been 30 minutes at best so surely Chiyo wasn’t already here, and you hadn’t expected any other guests today. You made your way to the front door quickly as the knocking and bell rang again. You looked out the peephole to see a well-dressed elderly couple, their silver hair and wrinkly skin leading you to believe they were well past retirement age. The older man grumbled something, prompting his wife to give him an unsavory look. You unlocked the door and gave them the best smile you could, the muscles in your face feeling achy as they stretched in a way they hadn’t in a while.

“Hello there,” The couple eyed you up and down as you swung it open to your unexpected visitors, “How can I help you?”

“We’re here looking for Hamamoto Akira,” The woman answered. She had a familiar-looking face framed by shoulder-length hair, silver-weaved earrings, and a necklace made of many silver strands led you to believe she was rather wealthy. “I take it that he’s not home?”

“He’s already found a younger mistress, how about that,” The man grumbled and crossed his arms over a tailored grey suit, framing the broad shoulders and belly of an aging man. Your fake smile melted as the man spoke.

“My father has done no such thing,” The implication of your father ruining his vow to your mother lit a furious flame in your chest. This snobbish man who didn’t even know your family was making assumptions based on what he’d seen in the last second.

“Your father?” The man adjusted his stance and looked you up and down again, his eyes lighting up as he saw the similarities between you and your mother.

“Yes?” You raised a quizzical brow, “Who are you exactly?”

“We’re your grandparents, Miss Hamamoto,” The woman looked at you with sad eyes, “Your mother Chinami was our daughter.”

Your heart was already heavy with the loss of your mother, but the wrench that is finding new relatives in your life suddenly was thrown in. Chinami never talked about her parents much, the vague notion of the Tsukishima clan made you think that they were long dead. Especially since you’d never seen them all your life, not to mention there was never a single picture of them anywhere. For a moment you felt distrust in the couple before you, perhaps they were lying and were con artists trying to cash in. The unease you felt at the strangers on your doorstep was eased when from behind them your father called out the man’s name.

“Mr. Tsukishima,” The older man turned at the sound of his name, his face growing sour at the sight of Akira.

“Just the man we wanted to see,” Mr. Tsukishima said, taking a step down from the porch and approaching slowly. Mrs. Tsukishima turned to observe her son-in-law, his hair grayer but his figure just as fit and lean as it had been in his younger years.

“It’s been a long time, sir,” Akira strained as he said the honorific. He gestured to the house and smiled plainly, “Would you two like to come in for some tea?”

“I’d be delighted,” Mrs. Tsukishima said.

“(Y/N),” Your ears pricked at the sound of your father calling your name, “Can you show your grandparents to the tea room while I prepare the water?”

“Yes sir,” You gave him a slow unsteady nod, now more nervous your actions were being taken with more scrutiny as you led your grandparents into the room next to the genkan. It was a smaller square room, rarely used because there were hardly any guests or tea to be had. A simple square kotatsu sat in the center with cushioned zaisu’s surrounding each side, you were about to sit with your grandparents when you remembered your manners.

“Ex-excuse me,” You bowed your head, “I’m going to help Father with the tea.”

You quickly backed out of the room, shutting the sliding doors behind you in time to see your father rounding into the hall to bring tea. You shuffled towards him quietly and spoke in a whisper, “Since when were grandma and grandpa alive?”

“They were never dead, sadly,” He muttered the last word soft enough that you could barely make it out. The one-word helped set what kind of relationship your father had with his in-laws. Your first impression was stuck up and snobbish, your suspicions were quickly confirmed when your father tried to explain briefly why your mother cut off her family. “The Tsukishima’s tried to marry your mother off when she was about your age, she ran away after finding out and never turned back. They never reach out except to stop us from getting married.”

“Really? Mom invited them?”

“Funny thing is she didn’t,” Akira’s eyes flitted towards the door just a couple meters away. “They kept an eye on her the entire time but let her keep the distance she had. They knew I bought a ring before she ever did.”

“Obviously it didn’t work, you two are married,” So how much power could they have over the lives of their children? You thought to yourself.

“We almost didn’t get married,” Your father's eyes dropped to the tea on the tray and looked back to the room. He skirted around you and pulled open the door to enter, leaving you to process in the hall.

You weren’t quite sure what he meant by ‘almost didn’t’, but something told you that your grandparents had everything to do with it. Your stomach twisted at the sight of them when you walked up to the open door, turning to hide your discomfort in their presence and close the door behind you. With eyes facing the ground you made your way to the remaining chair and sat carefully. Everything about being around the Tsukishima’s made you feel like you were walking on eggshells like you needed to be more aware of how you were sitting and breathing because it might set one of them off. Hamamoto Akira on the other hand had met the Tsukishima’s twice before and had enough training from his late wife to know how to act around the famous Tsukishima Gendo.

“Your tea, father,” Akira bowed his head, holding the bottom and side of Gendo’s cup with gentle fingers. Gendo from across reached for the cup and set it down gently, bowing his head politely. The frown engraved on his marble-like face made you believe that this man was truly unhappy to be in the presence of such company. Though inside Gendo couldn’t be happier to have finally met the grandchild he knew he had. “Your tea, mother.”

After Akira repeated the action for Tsukishima Junko and yourself, you all sipped on the tea. Despite the warm tea in your hands and the new warmth in your mouth you couldn’t help but feel overwhelmingly cold from the sparse conversation at the table. You set down your cup and folded your hands gently in your lap as your father stood straighter to address your grandparents.

“I take it you’re here to talk about funeral arrangements?” Akira said.

“Yes, we understand you want to stick to Buddhist tradition,” Gendo cleared his throat before continuing, “I support this decision.”

Akira undoubtedly felt a bit of surprise from Gendo’s support but wondered if the old man had ulterior motives for agreeing. “I’ve already spoken to a funeral director, her body is going to be delivered tomorrow. It’s a closed casket of course, so-”

“What do you mean ‘of course’?” Tsukishima Junko asked, her eyebrows drawing close in irritation. Before your father spoke more sensitively about the events of her death you found the need to blurt out what you remembered seeing that day and every night in your dreams since.

“Her head was caved in by concrete,” Your voice was dead and monotone, after days of not speaking very much it felt as if you had forgotten how to speak altogether. The image flashed again in your mind, leading you to close them tight and face your lap.

“How does she know that?” Junko was shocked and disgusted by the thought of her daughter’s gruesome death.

“(Y/N) was there,” Akira’s voice was slow and soft now, looking over to you with your head hung low. “She found her before I did.”

“A girl her age shouldn’t be witnessing such things,” Junko shook her head in disapproval. “It’s going to mess with her head.”

“(Y/N) was just working with her mother that evening,” Akira reached for your hand and placed it on the table with his, sandwiching them together. “I’m just glad she wasn’t taken as well, aren’t you?”

You felt your chest seize at the thought of your father weeping over the loss of his only child and wife on the same day. It could’ve been so much worse for him.

“Yes, that is a blessing,” Gendo nodded and sipped his tea. He set the cup down gently and let the tip of his finger tap gently on the lip. “So when do you plan on having the wake?”

“Day after tomorrow,” Akira said, “Then the funeral to follow.”

“Very well,” Gendo nodded and looked to his wife before continuing, “We’ll be staying in a hotel a little bit closer to central Tokyo. We will see you soon though, thank you for your hospitality.”

At that, your grandfather stood and held a hand to his wife. You stood with your father and escorted them to the front door. As you all said your goodbyes, your grandmother turned one last time before stepping off the small porch.

“You know, introducing yourself to new people is how modern society dictates if you have manners or not,” Junko began to turn away before you surprised her and your father with a deep bow.

“I’m sorry, grandmother, please forgive me,” You stood up straight and looked her in the eyes as you introduced yourself. “My name is Hamamoto (Y/N).”

You sat with your back against your bed, Chiyo’s legs on either side of you as she twisted your hair into a complicated weave. She had called it a fishtail braid, claiming it would give you cute wavy hair in the morning if you slept with the braid in. You didn’t feel the need to protest against her so you shrugged and sat on the floor. The surprise visit from your grandparents still bothered you, the idea that your mother kept something so big a secret from you ate away at your mind. After they left you vaguely mentioned Chiyo coming over that night before running back up to your room to clean. Your father didn’t bother coming back to talk to you about what had happened, he only came to let you know Chiyo arrived and to check on the two of you.

After your father left the room, leaving behind a tray of snacks, Chiyo kicked your hip. You turned and gave her an irritated look which she returned with a tongue childishly sticking out of her mouth.

“What’d you do that for,” You grumbled as you reached forward for the tray. Chiyo yanked the halfway-finished braid to bring you back between her knees. “Ow!”

“Why have you been so rude to your father?” Chiyo’s nimble fingers worked quickly to finish the braid in her hands.

“Kind of giving him the cold shoulder at the moment,” You gave yourself a second to process how you were going to word what you said next, wanting to give Chiyo a good handle on the situation before she went too wild with the story. “My grandparents stopped by, to check on preparations for the funeral, but the thing is they were my mom’s parents.”

“And?” Chiyo and you were close, but you weren’t sure if you mentioned anyone in your family outside your parents. So she might not think anything strange of the situation unless you outwardly say it.

“I’ve never met my mom’s parents, my entire life she never talked about them,” You shifted your feet under you, “I thought they were dead. Turns out they’ve been alive and well.”

“What?” Her voice was soft as what you said began to sink in, her fingers slowing as they neared the end of the braid. “So these two popped up out of nowhere after their daughter died, having seemingly no contact with her before this?”

“My dad said that they tried to marry her off around my age so she ran away,” You picked at your nail beds, already red and dry from the extra attention you’ve been sparing them recently. “I couldn’t imagine being married at this age.”

“I’d run away too,” Chiyo tied the end of the braid and swung her legs around you to stand up. “I see then, why you’re acting like this I mean. He-they all unloaded a huge secret on you suddenly, I think I’d be pretty pissed too.”

“My parents were almost not married at all,” You sighed and laid your head back on the bed. “Whatever that means. I’m guessing if they would send off their daughter to some random man, then they’d probably stop at nothing to make sure she wasn’t married to someone else like my dad. They seemed rich too like their clothes didn’t match what most of the older people in the neighborhood wear.”

“What do you mean?” Chiyo’s eyes lit up as a realization crossed her mind, “They were probably trying to sell your mom, not just give her away! If you’re saying they’re like rich rich, then they must’ve tried to arrange a marriage pact with someone.”

“Not unlikely,” You stood to your feet and picked at the tray on your desk, settling on a few grapes. “My grandma was wearing all this silver, and the broach on her jacket was made only out of jewels.”

“They have to be rich then,” Chiyo nodded gently, “My grandma’s broaches are made out of sequins, beads, and maybe 1 jewel.”

“I like her bee one,” You noted, the image of Mrs. Tanaka preparing dinner and hugging you goodbye after visiting warmed your heart. It was the ideal image of a grandmother, not whoever you saw that afternoon.

“Me too,” Chiyo nibbled on the edge of a cracker and sat on your desk chair. “I’m really sorry this is all happening to you at the same time you should be grieving.”

“I suppose it’s a welcomed distraction from crying all day long,” You subconsciously wiped the tear that wasn’t there away.

“Distractions are nice, but don’t forget you can take your time if you need it,” Chiyo rubbed your arm gently, “And don’t forget if something makes you happy, don’t feel bad for being happy. Your mother wanted you to find your happiness in the world, don’t let her being gone get you down.”

“It’s not just her being gone that’s bringing me down,” You felt you indeed to voice the noise in your head. The idea of your failure at U.A. Exams was constant, no matter what you did to make the little voice go away she was always there to torment you. Even at the wreckage of the accident she was present. Telling you that maybe becoming a hero was a mistake if you couldn’t even save those who were close to you. “I don’t know if I can make it at U.A. anymore. I think I’m going to fail my exams and I’ll have nothing to fall back on-”

“Hey, listen to me,” Chiyo grabbed your shoulders and made you look up at her. “I’ve known you a long time, that little voice in your head is just your anxiety trying to get the better of you. You are so smart and so strong, the examiners are going to see this in your tests and admit you immediately. There is no doubt in my mind that you aren’t going to go out there to your exams, nail them, and become a great hero in the future. One that goes out and gives people hope when you arrive.”

“Thanks, Chiyo,” You could feel that her words were not having any effect on you, the numbness in your chest spreading to your arms and legs. The sudden need to curl up in a ball and cry was overwhelming as a wave of grief washed over you. You choked on the tears coming up and hugged your sides. Chiyo wrapped her arms around you in a heartbeat, her warmth did nothing to warm the cold achiness of your heart.

After realizing you wouldn’t find sleep again, you pulled the comforter off of yourself and swung your legs off the bed. At the sign of movement, Chiyo didn’t stir, telling you she was fast asleep. You reached for your phone and glanced at your most recent notification, a text message from Katsuki just 10 minutes ago.

B. Katsuki: I hope you’re starting to feel better today, let me know if you need anything. Goodnight.

You: R u still up?

B. Katsuki: Yeah. Wanna talk?

You: Can’t on the phone, wanna meet in the yard?

B. Katsuki: On the way

You glanced down at the pajamas you wore and decided socks and a jacket were enough to keep you warm enough in the winter night. The stairs were forgiving as you quietly stepped down and made your way towards the front door. You slipped on your canvas loafers and opened the door to see Katsuki waiting at your front door. His cheeks were red, you assumed from the cold air, and his hair was dusted in snow. You looked past him to see the flurries floating gently down from the sky.

“I’m sorry,” You said looking back to him, “I didn’t realize it was going to snow.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Katsuki gave you a small smile paired with concerned eyes, “I’m just glad you’re reaching out.”

“I've realized I have a tendency to push people away when things are a little rough,” You shut the door gently behind you and stared down at the road ahead of you, Chiyo made you see the pattern you were too involved in to see. When things got rough for you to handle you started pushing people away, it had happened to her a few times too. After talking with her, you realized you had done it to Katsuki plenty of times too. “I’m not the best at handling my emotions sometimes, but the least I could do is apologize when I know I’ve been ignoring someone I care about.”

“You don’t have to apologize for anything,” Katsuki walked to stand in front of your line of sight, his fists stuffed deep into his pockets as he shook from the cold. 

“I do Katsuki,” You were picking at your thumb before you were able to muster the courage to look into his eyes. “ I shouldn’t have avoided you in school after we kissed, we should’ve talked about it, because I really liked it. I just didn’t have the courage to tell you just how confused I was afterward. I’m really sorry for pushing you away after your fight with Haru, I shouldn’t have done that. I’m sorry-”

You were cut short by surprise when Katsuki’s hands reached out to hold you, pulling you forward into his body. He gently laid a hand on your lower and upper back to pull you in closer. You felt the flutter in your chest grow and warmth began to replace the once cold pit in your chest. Your head found a home nestled into Katsuki’s neck and your hands wrapped tightly around his back. There was safety and comfort in his arms as he held you close, making your chest shudder as you struggled to breathe against the silent tears. 

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for,” Katsuki reached up to stroke your hair gently, “You can push me away but I’ll always be here for you. The only thing I need to hear from you is go and I’ll go.”

“D-Don’t,” You struggled to say the words, the tight feeling in your chest making it hard to speak without breaking down in his arms. “Please don’t go Katsuki.”

Mucus and tears mix to stain his shoulder as he holds you close to him, his chest rattling with your cries. Katsuki held on tighter, not wanting to let you out of his arms until you felt better. You didn’t want to let him go either.

“Okay.”

[memory-echo]

Manga Endings: A Triumph of Closure

The conclusion of a manga series encapsulates the culmination of characters' journeys. For me, not a prolific reader, few have achieved the level of satisfaction and resonance as those of Fullmetal Alchemist, Silver Spoon, and Dragon Ball. These three series stand as prime examples of how to craft exceptional endings that tie up loose ends, evoke emotional resonance, and leave a lasting impact on readers.

Fullmetal Alchemist, especially, is a masterpiece known for its intricate plot and well-developed characters. Its ending is a testament to Hiromu Arakawa's storytelling prowess, as she seamlessly weaves together the narrative threads to provide a sense of closure, which leaves the readers satisfied and fulfilled.

Similarly, and perhaps because it's by the same author, Silver Spoon's ending is a triumph in its own right, offering a poignant reflection on dreams, self-discovery, and the pursuit of happiness. The characters' paths converge naturally, showcasing their evolution and growth. Arakawa's ability to infuse the finale with both optimism and nostalgia demonstrates her mastery in delivering a heartwarming and memorable conclusion.

Unlike Hiromu Arakawa, Akira Toriyama's Dragon Ball achieves a fine balance between satisfying character resolutions and the promise of continued adventure. By leaving the door open for future exploration, while still delivering a heartfelt send-off, Toriyama succeeds in offering an ending that honors the series' legacy.

The conclusion of a manga can greatly influence readers' overall perception and satisfaction with the work as a whole. An open-ended or unsatisfying ending can leave readers feeling frustrated and disconnected from the story they've invested in. A well-crafted ending, on the other hand, provides a sense of closure, answers lingering questions, and allows readers to feel a sense of fulfillment after accompanying the characters on their journey.

Striking a balance between leaving room for interpretation and providing a clear resolution is truly an art form. I just finished Insomniacs After School, Ojiro Makoto's masterpiece as far as I'm concerned, but that last chapter felt a little too vague. I was a little disappointed with it. A satisfying ending doesn't necessarily require that all loose ends need to be tied up in a neat little bow, but it should provide a sense of thematic and emotional closure, and I just didn't feel it... I would've preferred that Isaki and Ganta would meet their friends to watch the eclipse, and they'd stay together, taking pictures, maybe holding hands or whatever...

Shūzō Oshimi's Welcome Back, Alice also finished publication recently, and I felt it was a satisfying ending, as satisfying as Oshimi's endings usually are. He often leans towards open-ended and somewhat vague final chapters, which can leave readers with a sense of ambiguity, inviting them to interpret the outcomes and implications for themselves. Sometimes it's intriguing, sometimes it's frustrating.

Ultimately, Oshimi's approach to endings is a deliberate artistic choice that reflects his thematic exploration of human psychology and relationships. While it might not resonate with everyone, it's worth acknowledging that his intention might be to leave readers pondering the complexities of his characters and their journeys.

Despite knowing this, I'm terribly afraid of how he's going to finish Blood On The Tracks... With barely any notice, we've been informed that the manga will end on September 8th. Many people believe that the manga has been dragging for a while, but I'm not one of those people.

Of course this manga could have ended in chapter 82, or chapter 140 (without the last page, of course). These would've been great places to end it. As it is now, I would've like to see at least nine more chapters to bring about a meaningful closure but, as I said before, the author seems to prefer open endings...

Three hypotheses are up in the air: either Seiichi kills himself, or he goes back to the same boring routine we saw him have in chapter 110, or he actually tries to find a better future. All I know is it's going to be rushed. It will require a certain level of acceptance from me because I know I'll never have another "Fullmetal ending". I'm not going to have enough time to absorb the final moments and say my farewell to this character I've grown se attached to. I can speak for myself, of course.

Can Blood On The Tracks ever have a fitting and impactful conclusion?

[v5hadow]

WIP Wednesday

Royal Strikers: Chapter 1 Scene 2.3

haha.... Not where I wanted to be when I posted this, as the end still has a (need to write this here) thing still and definitely needs a little smoothing, dialogue tagging, action, etc. especially towards the end. but man it's close enough after most of a month for an initial post. I'm already guessing next week is either a filler-ish bit or the next section of Futaba's Lost and Found Services since the ending of the next major scene eludes me and has for a little while. And today one of my tarot deck also was a snarky little thing about this story it seems. Like needed sass, but that isn't the deck to do that normally.

Yuuki looked up and behind him to look at Akira as he said, “And well, Akira’s here and is supposed to be hanging out with his friends all summer. What are his parents going to care if he, and by extension Morgana, is in Tokyo or Kyoto or wherever?”

Akira took a deep breath in. “That’s… true.” 

“Can confirm, they did literally say ‘have fun in Tokyo or whatever.’” Morgana tried teasing between purrs.

“Soooo. What is your mom going to say about a few weeks of skipping rehab?” Ann asked as she toyed with the small knitted doll of a red cat.

“Mom seemed fine if my docs were,” Ryuji answered while waving his hand. “And I already promised my docs I’ll be doing the exercises I can outside of their offices and to not overdo it.”

Makoto added the question of “What about grades or money?”

Ryuji looked at Makoto seemingly confused on the question but responded, “Eh, I can likely still do so? Mom’s normally pretty good about most things involving me and school, and she’s never really questioned too much about money?”

“Just using Aki and-“ Yuuki started before stopping as he got squeezed by Akira with the arm around his waist. He flusterly continued, “Nii…Makoto’s presence in the group should help you.” 

Ryuji leaned back into his chair, about to tilt onto two of its legs. “You all are way too worried for no reason.” 

“And you two don’t have to be so attached right now.” The grumbling from Morgana caused the two to shift, Yuuki slightly away, only to keep a grip on Akira’s hand. Akira near immediately adjusted to use his partner’s shoulder as a pillow and finished with sticking his tongue out at the cat-like monster .

As the boys moved, Futaba gave an especially rough pat as she told him, “You have no room to talk, Morgana.”

Haru hid a little laugh before telling the protesting creature “Mona-chan, you’ve been getting pets from Taba-chan and I since we came up here.”

“He’s just jealous about not getting much attention from Lady Ann in comparison to her omiyage,”Akira quipped. 

Ann gave an exaggerated sigh, though still smiling as she stated, “If he wants pets, all he has to do is ask.” Morgana very quickly left his space with Futaba to twirl around Ann’s legs before eventually ending up in her lap getting more pets.

“Frankly Mishima, I'm surprised you aren’t the most free since Akira is here.” Yusuke said as he closed his sketchbook.

With a slight wince, Yuuki explained, “I have a summer job my parents insisted I get. Otherwise yeah, I probably would be.”

Haru quietly asked, “Do you think they made you get a job to keep you away from Akira?” “I’ve met them and yeah totally possible.” Ann’s voice held a fiery dislike. 

“Agreed.” Ryuji also not looking especially happy. 

“Maybe, I don't know. I think they think I’m getting up to something scandalous since I stopped being volleyball captain a few weeks ago.” Yuuki received a few sympathetic glances and a squeeze of his hand. 

“Remind me how that happened again? The becoming captain bit.” Ryuji asked.

“Dr. Maruki.” Yuuki quickly interjected before anyone else could answer. 

“More like all the team recognizing him as the one who did the most after Shiho jumped to correct things. It happens to be close timing though.” Ann insisted.

Makoto backed Ann’s statement up with the fact, “You wouldn’t have still been captain if it was just Maruki’s doing, Yuuki-kun.”

“I didn’t do that much! I barely apologized to everyone I hurt because of Kam-him. And I’m still pretty bad at volleyball.” Yuuki curled a bit into himself, breaking Akira’s hold on his hand while doing so.

“You are good at making sure tasks get done without hounding people about it and just generally organized.” Futaba listed off.

Akira scooted Yuuki back over to hug him as he said, “You looked pretty good whenever we caught your practices.” 

A small raise in Yuuki’s mood began as he denied their claims.“You are very biased.”

“And you have that one video I saw!” Haru tried her hand at arguing the point of Yuuki’s skill.

“Star player of the match of several games during the spring, apparently.” Makoto agreed.

“Between you and Sumi, at least I’m not the only sports person!” Ryuji raised his fist for a bump.

“You all have way too much confidence in me.” Ryuji started to lower his hand which brought with it his mood. Yuuki rolled his eyes before finishing the fist bump before Ryuji could finish pulling his hand away. He then said, “I still can’t believe, of all the things that happened around New Years, that’s the thing that stuck.”

“I find it refreshing that you have the everyday recognition of what you’ve done. Most things the rest of us have done ebb and flow with our popularity. Even worse as a group.” Yusuke spoke up.

Yuuki sighed before reminding everyone, “On the note of everyday and thieves, I’ll also have more moderating to do too on the Phan-site due to everyone ELSE being off for summer too. It’s quieter, especially compared to last year, but not something I can completely ignore.”

“Hey, you’ve got a team to help with that!” Futaba loudly announced while pointing at Yuuki. She looked around the room before shrugging as she continued, “Not that anyone here but me is really gonna help with it. But Chihiro-san and Midorikawa would be very disappointed.”

“Aww, Yuuki, you sure can’t put it down for yet another vacation for us?” Akira teased while pulling Yuuki even closer again.

The smaller boy pulled a little away before smiling at his boyfriend. “I’m sure, but I’ll definitely be trying to keep it down.” “Though holidays never seem to work out in our favor.” 

“Yeah, Christmas Eve sucked from every direction.” Ryuji nodded along.

Futaba agreed, “The site’s backlash didn’t help and beyond then things got weird.” 

Ann added, “Everything third semester was weird.” 

“Agreed.” Haru nodded. 

“Golden Week I know was pretty rough for you, Akira.” Makoto sympathized.

Akira shook his head as he said, “My hometown is pretty weird every so often at that time of year, but was thinking Hawaii.” 

“Wow, do you guys have shit luck.” Ryuji joked.

Yuuki grumbled out, “We weren’t even-“

Ryuji cut off his friend, saying, “Yeah, yeah we know you were sorting your head back together after your boyfriend talked to your Shadow.”

Yusuke attempted to correct, “Ryuji, I believe he was referring to you and Ann having to bunk the night in their room.”

“Oh, I thought you were going to say something about when Ryuji dragged the three of you to hit on girls.” Ann added.

Yuuki practically squeaked out, “When do you all think we got together?!” He then fairly quickly covered his mouth and cheeks with his hands.

A cacophony of answers, most seeming to indicate last summer. 

Haru was the last to answer, stating, “Oh I thought it was right before you all met me, while I had Morgana.”

Said cat laughed as he lept on to the table. “Closer but nope, it was while Akira was in hiding.” 

“What do you mean December?” Ryuji shouted. 

Futaba rolled her eyes as she corrected, “It was November.”

“How, how are Morgana and Futaba the only ones even close on that?” 

“Did Akira ever tell us?” Makoto questioned the rest of the group.

“He literally told you all to leave right before their first date!” Mongana defended.

“Seriously, Aki.” Yuuki muttered as he buried his face into his boyfriend’s shoulder.

Ryuji defended his assumptions, “I thought he meant their first since he didn’t die!”

“Same!” Ann seemed to express for most of the rest of the group.

“The only time they almost went on a date before November got almost immediately crashed by Shinya.” Futaba almost cackled from her spot by the window.

Ryuji rubbed the back of his head as said, “Felt like I’d run into those two near Takeshita Street almost every time I was at Harajuku last year.”

“I thought the planetarium… No, nevermind.” Makoto shook her head. 

Morgana rolled his eyes, before explaining, “Yuuki always had a Phan-site excuse, right?” A round of agreement from everyone. “And you all would join and neither ever argued?” 

“What’s that got to do with anything?” Ryuji narrowed his eyes

 “Not much, just all of you, including Sumire-chan and Akechi, had more successful potential dates than the lovebirds?”   

Neither of the boyfriend pair paid much attention once Morgana took control of the conversation. Instead Akira focused on reassuring his partner. “What, if anything it’s funny they think we were dating for longer than we have been.” Akira shrugged, mostly with the shoulder the smaller boy wasn’t on. “That’s a lot of almost dates they can think of honestly.”

“It's not really funny, it's more-” The alarm of a phone rang out in the middle of his sentence. Yuuki finished his sentence as he fished his phone out of his pocket as he stood up, “Frustrating.” 

“And embarrassing?” Akira softened as he asked.

“A little?” Yuuki then raised his voice back to something the entire room could hear as he shut off the alarm, saying, “And unfortunately, that alarm was my signal that I have to head out.”

Ryuji patted his friend’s arm as he confirmed, “Junes, yeah?” He got a confused nod but definitely didn’t stop a smile from starting to come back.

Both boys sitting on the crate bench were up and approaching the stairs.

“Good luck!” Makoto offered.

“Take no prisoners!” Haru playfully encouraged.

Futaba leaned back, taking up more of the ledge. “We’ll likely just shoot the breeze until dinner, so don’t worry.”

Yusuke took that moment to interject, “In that case, let us speak of modern art and-

“Anything but that. Hey Yuuki, I'll join you!”

“You want to potentially end up in front of a grill?”

“Yeah, nope. See ya.”

“At least it isn’t the bear mascot costume.” Akira’s jovial mood spread confusion across almost all the teens.

Makoto expressed her disbelief with a “But the mascot isn’t a bear?” 

“Where in Japan do they have a bear mascot?” Haru tilted her head to the side. 

“No idea but apparently Inaba. But I need to go before I miss my train.”

“Bye, Yuuki!” Ann smiled and shot a fast directing glance at Akira before returning to the departing Thief, who took a deep breath. She then quickly tried to bring the focus on to herself and a modeling gig she did in a Junes a few months ago.

“We’ll talk more tonight?” Akira softly asked.

“Definitely.”

“Stay here?”

“Of course. All you had to do is ask.”

(insert yuuki kissing corner of akira’s mouth, Akira fully on lips) 

“Stealing kisses now?”

“Only yours”

Akira was slow to tune back to the world around him as he sat back down. The group had moved on to listening to a story of Yusuke getting cheap vegetables but was swiftly interrupted by Ryuji asking their leader, “Your hometown for real has a Junes with a bear mascot?”

[chromatic-fate]

I Dream of What Ifs

Hello, everyone!

I am a big fan of @thedeerus Persona 5 AU’s and I decided to make a one-shot of their Murder Boyfriend AU! If you don’t know @thedeerus , please go check them out, they make some cool ass shit (and please send them some couples therapy their way their wife is trying kill them--)

Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goro got nightmares, it was a nightly occurrence for him and Akira. It was one of the reasons they slept together every night. But tonight they had to sleep alone.

         It was the night before Goro, Akria, and the Phantom Thieves stole Sae Niijima’s Treasure, and Takamaki had suggested a big sleepover at her apartment. The Detective Duo tried to refuse, but Suzui, the little shit, made it mandatory under the pretense that “it would be a great way to build team trust before the end of our arrangement.” Bitch.

         Goro lied on his futon, losing a staring contest with the ceiling as he tried his best to fight off the impending sleep. He had run through each detailed step for tomorrows plan at least ten times now, and came up with a few more scenarios that he quickly made plan for as well, but he could feel the tiredness slowly seep into his bones.

         A sudden whimper from his right made Goro turn his head towards the sound. Akira, who lay right next to him on the living room floor, had an expression of deep pain and worry. His brows were knitted together, his eyes squeezed tight as if waiting for a hard blow, and his breathing heavier than normal.

         Goro let out a quiet sigh before gently grabbing Akira’s hand and slowly rubbing circles with his thumb. Eventually, Akira’s breathing evened out and his face began to relax, making the brunette smile fondly at him.

         Goro released his hand from Akira’s before getting up from his futon and heading to the kitchen. Goro needed the sleep, he knew he did, it was a big day for everyone tomorrow, but it was hard to sleep with the nightmares. Goro grabbed a glass from one of the cabinets and filled it with water.

         As the brunette drank his glass, his thought of ways he could mitigate the nightmares while here. He knew that physical contact with Akira helped both their nightmares, so maybe he could hold Akira’s hand and cover them up with something? No, their futons were far enough apart that it would look suspicious, and there was no way that either of them were going to get up before any of the thieves.

         “Akechi?” A quiet, but still very sudden, voice said from behind him.

         Goro quickly lowered his glass and spun to the voice, his mind on high alert now. At the entrance of the kitchen stood Suzui, but something was off about her; her dark brown eyes seemed dim, and her body posture was small and fearful.

         “Ah, Suzui, what are you doing up this late?” Goro asked, quickly trying to hide his alertness.

         “I could ask you the same thing.” Suzui quickly put up a smile, but Goro could tell it was fake.

         The brunette gave a practiced chuckle and set his glass down in the sink as Suzui want to grab one herself. She quietly filled the glass with water and slowly drank from the it, her fake smile slowly fading as well as she stared off into space.

         A though crossed Goro’s mind as he stared at the leader of the Phantom Thieves right next to him. Suzui is acting off, she must be shaken by something. Most likely a bad nightmare. Goro internally smirked.

         “Are you alright? You seem a little distracted.” The boy asked gently. He had to be careful here, on wrong move and Suzui would shut him down.

         The girl snapped her head to the detective. She stared at him for a good few minutes, a contemplative look in her eyes. Looks like she thinking over his over. Eventually, she let out a quiet sigh and gently set her glass on the counter.

         “Do you ever wonder…what it might be like…if things were just a little different?” Suzui asked.

         “What do you mean?” Goro responded, trying to get more out of the girl.

         There was a quiet pause before Suzui continued. “The reason I started the Phantom Thieves was to stop Kamoshida from hurting me, Ann, and the other volleyball players, but I only managed to gain that courage because I had access to the Metaverse…” She paused again, turning her head to look away from him. “And I was only able to awaken Medea because Ann was going to die…”

         “I’m sorry that you were put into that situation.” Goro tried to comfort.

         Suzui stayed silent for a little while, leaving a tense atmosphere between them, so tense that Goro visibly tense for a few milliseconds, before she spoke up again.

         “But, after everything that’s happened with Okumura and now Sae, I can’t help but go to all these ‘what if’s. What if I never got that app? What if I never summoned Medea? What if I never went to the Metaverse? What if I never went to Shujin?” Suzui hugged her arms as her voice became weaker. “Would I still stand up to Kamoshida? Would I have still met all my friends? Would the Phantom Thieves still exist? Would Ann still be alive?” Suzui began to tremble slightly, as she practically whispered the next question. “Would I still…be alive?”

         Goro stared at the girl before him, his sudden alertness now completely gone, shock now taking its place. He honestly didn’t know how to respond to something like this. Sure, he and Akira would give contemplative “what if” scenarios to each other from time to time, but they rarely went this deep.

         “Sometimes…I dream about those ‘what if’s.” Suzui continued. “The most common one is…not one I like talking about.”

         “It might help if you do.” Goro offered, seeing a point where he could hit gold.

         Suzui stayed silent for little bit, a contemplative look on her face again, before she let out another sigh.

         “It’s what might have happened if Ann and I never went to the Metaverse…” The girl began, her eyes dim more as she remembers the dream. “I’m standing on the school roof, on the other side of the fence…I don’t know what happened to make me do this, or I don’t want to remember, but…I jump…” Suzui pauses for a minute, building the courage to continue. “I’m still alive, but…I’m on a medical caot…Ann is crying above me, asking me why…I don’t know what I say to her, but it’s related to Kamoshida…And then I pass out…But the strangest thing about the dream isn’t that I remember all of it, or that I can still feel the pain from the fall, but…” Suzui gives a brief glance at Akira through the kitchen window, who is still sleeping soundly on his futon, and Goro finds his action strange until he hears Suzui’s next sentence. “It’s that Kurusu is there, watching from the crowd, next to Ryuji…”

         Goro’s open hands turn into fists. What? Why would Akira be there? Akira went to Kosei with Goro, why would Akira be in Suzui’s dream attending Shujin? Why would he be in Suzui’s dream at all? It made his blood boil.

         Goro shook his head and crossed his arms to rid his irrational and angry thoughts, before slipping his Detective Prince mask back on. He couldn’t blow their cover, not when they’re so close to the end.

         “I see…I’m sorry for all the stress that’s been put upon you lately, Suzui. And I’m glad that you are here.” Goro says with his fake, honey coated, consoling voice he uses for victims who have lost someone to one of his mental shutdowns.

         Suzui turns to him with a weak, but genuine smile and gives him a nod.

         “Thank you, Akechi…That means a lot right now…” Suzui said.

         “Did talking about it help?” Goro asked.

         Suzui nodded again and finished her glass of water before putting it in the sink next to Goro’s.

         “It did. Thank you for listening to me. I think I’m going to go back to bed now. Goodnight.” Suzui finished off before walking back out of the kitchen and into Ann’s room where the girls slept.

         Goro stood in the kitchen for while longer, his thoughts still stuck on that line about Akira being amongst the students of Shujin in Suzui’s dream. Such a concept was unthinkable to Goro, impossible even, and just the passing thought of it made his blood boil with rage. He tried using this chance to see what made Suzui tick, what shook her the most, and instead he was the one getting affected by the mere mention of Akira attending Shujin of all places.

         Goro stayed in the kitchen until he was calm enough to leave, before heading back to his futon. He was still angry, but not enough that it would control him. The brunette sighed as he slipped back under the covers. He wasn’t going to get any sleep tonight, was he?

[hockeyforthefirsttime]

Speechless- Nolan Patrick

AN: Is the ending literal trash? yes, do i care at this point? also yes, but not enough

Word count: just over 3k

TW: none that I can think of, but let me know if i need to tag something:)

i

Nolan is definitely bored at the bar. He is out and supposed to be celebrating a win, but third wheeling with Tavis and Karly, simply is not fun. Not that it ever has been, but as he watches them laugh at each other on the dance floor.. well he takes a deep sigh and an even deeper swig of his beer. Some of the team is gathered around the bar ordering another round of drinks, and as he is scanning the crowd a woman walks in front of him, making him look up at her. 

And stop dead in his thoughts. 

She is wearing jeans that cling to her curves just right, a deep magenta top that seems to wrap around her stomach, before it reveals a little more than he can handle, and he looks up at her and sees the ghost of a smile on her lips. She isn’t looking at him though. She seems to be looking into the crowded dance floor, and Nolan desperately wants to know who she is looking for. 

In any other situation like this, he would have swept her off of her feet and wouldn’t have put her down until they’d reach his bed. But her obliviousness to him has knocked him off balance it seems. 

“Hey Patty, me and Karly are gonna head home. Want a ride?” 

Travis comes up to Nolan, Karly in tow and the mysterious girl moves with a quiet sorry and a fleeting smile. Nolan can feel his eyes drift after her before he meets Travis’ eyes, which are brimming with amusement. 

“Nah, I’m good.” 

He answers, and Travis bursts out laughing. 

“What, so you can sit here and stare like some kind of creep the rest of the night?” 

Nolan sees Karly gently shoving on Travis, also having noticed Nolans lingering gaze. 

“As opposed to going home in the same car as you two rabbits? No thank you.” 

Travis and Karly bid their goodbyes as the rest of the team and their significant others appear back at the table. Nobody seems to take notice of the Nolans distantness though, pinning it down as just his Philly personality. Nobody really sees him staring at this girl dancing in vans and a pink top. 

As the song ends he watches her go up to the bar, so in normal Nolan fashion he gets up and heads in that direction. He takes a look down at his watch and in a second, a split fucking second, she is gone. 

ii

He’s so fucking tired. The game last night had been decent. They’d won in overtime and Nolan had the assist, yet he keeps going over the chances he had and the chances he missed making in his head. Driving to the rink is dreary but even more so than usual. It’s not until he stops at a red light that he wakes up. He’s supporting his head on his left arm and looking out the passenger seat window. His eyes widen when he sees who is in the beaten up truck next to him. 

The girl from the bar three weeks ago. She has her hair down her shoulders and is looking at him through her own window. When she catches his eyes, she gives him a wink. As if she recognizes him. And if this was anyone else he might have given her a half smile, or even a wink back. But no. He can feel his cheeks heating up and getting rosy. God how he wishes he could be as confident as he usually is. The girl in the other car seems to be laughing a little, a smile on her lips. Nolan swears she starts slipping away from view, and in that second he remembers. He’s at a fucking red light. Except it isn’t red anymore, made obvious by the boisterous truck behind him, basically laying on his horn. 

Quickly he presses his foot down on the gas pedal and looks for the beaten up truck, which is nowhere to be seen. 

iii

It’s still winter and Nolan for some reason unknown to him decides to take a walk in the park not far from his apartment. He blames it on his restlessness, which stems from sitting inside the entire weekend. It’s nearing Christmas time and the main section of the park is covered in fairy lights and christmas decorations. There’s even a stand that sells hot chocolate. 

He buys a cup, puts in his earbuds and starts walking. It is nice out, he decides, with all the people out enjoying the snow on the ground. There are even some kids out rolling big snowballs, which turn into snow men and women. He feels a sudden wave of content roll over him. And a smile subconsciously finds its way onto his lips.

Nolan walks a little further, and doesn’t really stop, until a ball of golden fur is at his feet, almost making him trip. The wagging tail is making the entire body of the dog move and he catches himself smiling and taking out one of the earbuds. Immediately he hears the voice of a girl shouting. 

“Akira!”

The dog at his feet, looks around eagerly as her owner sprints up to him. And Nolan can hardly believe his luck. It is the bar girl. 

“I’m so sorry, she usually doesn’t run off like that.” 

And judging by her attire she is out for a jog, which would explain how out of breath she is. Quickly she pulls a leash out of her pocket and hooks it onto Akira’s harness. 

“Oh there’s no worries.” 

Nolan manages to stutter out. He sees a little smirk on her lips and curses his reddening cheeks for being so obvious. He bends his head a little and scratches Akira behind her ears. The golden retriever leans into his touch and a soft chuckle escapes the girl standing in front of him. 

He is just about to ask the girl her name when a phone starts ringing. It’s hers. Quickly, from another pocket, she pulls out a phone and answers it. He watches with steady eyes as a frown starts to grow on her face. 

“Fuck, okay yeah, I’ll be home in a few.” 

She hangs up the phone and pockets it, before she turns to look at him again. With a wink she turns around and Akira follows. 

“See you around Shy Guy!”

And just like that she’s gone. His chocolate is no longer hot, so he tracks back to his apartment, with discouragement sitting in his chest like a rock.

iiii

The Starbucks is so full, the line goes through the door and that’s the reason why Nolan doesn’t even consider entering it. He turns and treks back a block until he sees this quaint little cafe he’s never really noticed. Which is no surprise, because it seems to be mostly inhabited by students. With the amount of computers and books up at the cafe tables and its location closer to UPenn it should come as no surprise. 

And maybe he gets a little hopeful that the bar girl will be there, so despite his logical mind, he enters through the glass doors and goes straight to the counter. The boy has to be around his own age, but a fair bit skinnier and with glasses on. It makes him look a bit too young in Nolan's eyes, but it doesn’t really matter. 

“Hey, what can I get you today?” 

The young boy asks as he wipes down the counter. 

“Ehh, just a large black coffee, please.” 

Nolan says and pulls out his wallet. He doesn’t completely register the bell over the door ringing, not until the gust of cold air washes over him. Instinctively he turns and spots a smaller frame entering the cafe. A hoodie over their head and a black jacket, lightly dusted with quickly melting snow.  And a pair of beaten up, black vans on their feet. His hopes rise, and yet again he is rewarded with the presence of the bar girl. She shakes out her hair a little as she pulls the hood off of her head. Nolan could swear his heart stopped right there. The evening sun shines through the window, making her hair appear as a halo around her. 

She hasn’t noticed him yet. So he turns and tries to calm his blush. The guy behind the counter has begun making his coffee so he doesn’t really know what to do. The bar girl comes up behind him. He can tell by the way the barista nods at her with a smile. 

“Hey Dylan, how are you today?” 

And Nolan is instantly a bit jealous of this Dylan, who gets to hear his name falling from her lips. 

“I’m good Rory, thanks, how are you?” 

Dylan answers, and it feels like his heart is in his throat. Her name is Rory? It suits her. 

“Could be better to be honest, this paper on existence due next week is really kicking my ass.” 

She answers as she comes closer, and Nolan moves further up the counter to give them room. 

“Tell me about it, you want the usual?” 

She nods and slings her backpack off one shoulder to unzip a pocket, and pulls out a card. Dylan finishes Nolan's order and places it on the corner of the counter. Nolan can feel his chance slip through his fingers and begins to panic a little. 

Until he spots a pen on the counter near his cup. Quickly he grabs it and scribbles his name and number on the cup. And he couldn’t have cued it better for AV to call him. He puts the cup down again and picks up the call. 

“Nolan, have you looked over the videos yet?”

Alain, straight to the point as usual. 

“Yeah, saw them yesterday, and I have some ideas in mind for me to improve.” 

He speaks into the phone, while he puts a hand on the back of his neck. 

“Good good, I will see you tomorrow then?” 

“Yes, sir. Bright and early.” 

And then they hang up. He sees that another cup has appeared beside his. He throws a quick glance at Rory, who is still talking to the barista,  and turns his cup the other way so the writing isn’t visible and grabs her cup. Then, he nods a goodbye to Dylan and exits the door. 

He’s almost half a block away when his phone rings. He hasn’t drunk out of the cup, but it smells a little sweet and enticing. He looks at the phone and sees an unknown number. He lets it ring twice more before answering.

“Hey, this is Nolan?” 

He tries to sound nonchalant. 

“Hey, Shy guy. This is Rory. You didn’t by any chance grab my coffee on the way out?” 

Despite the fact that he doesn’t actually know her, he swears he can hear a smile over the phone. And he is a little bit shocked by the nickname. 

“Oh, so this is who it belongs to?”

She lets out a little chuckle, before she answers. 

“Yeah, mind returning it?” 

He smiles at the laugh. 

+1

Nolan is different, not that he will admit it, but the team can tell. He seems to be more patient, more focused on practicing drills and getting them right, and also for some reason, more ready for practice to be over. At first it’s a subtle change, but after a while and two games where he plays over all very well, it seems to be more than just determination. It seems like he wants to impress someone. 

At first they shake it as him wanting to prove himself to.. well everyone. But one day when Oskar asks him who he is texting so frequently, Nolan can feel his cheeks and ears tint even more than usual. Damn her and the effect she has on him. He tries to play it cool with a casual shrug, but half the locker room seems to burst out laughing. Quickly he puts his phone in his pocket and heads for the door. 

“Have a good weekend guys!” 

He calls out behind him out of habit, as it is a weekend without games and he is taking a short trip home. Various chirps get called out behind him, but Teeks seems to be the loudest one. 

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” 

And all hell breaks loose as they all start on chirping Travis about how he can do anything then. With a fond smile, Nolan heads for his car, where he has a pre- packed bag as well as his passport and a carryon. 

He parks his car in the airport parking lot and he swears, there is something familiar about the truck beside his car. He shoves it to the back of his mind and starts crossing to the terminal. He’s late tho, and only half an hour to get on his flight, so as he anxiously stands in line for check in he pulls up his phone and sees a new text from Rory.

Hey, I’ll be gone for a couple of hours, text when I can:)

It was sent five minutes ago, and he groans a little at the fact that he has to wait faster, very bored. Finally he has checked in his bag and been cleared to enter the airport all the way to his flight. 

In a half jog, half sprint he manages to make it just shy of ten minutes before the gate closes. He pulls his cap further down on his head and puts his ticket and passport on the desk. The hostess scowls at him but lets him enter the already boarded plane. 

The smell of too many people and bad flight food smacks him in the face as he enters the plane with another nod to a different flight hostess. 

34B seems too far away, but he bites his tongue and keeps walking. He looks at the bald man in 34C and the hooded figure in 34A. He swears, there is something familiar about this too but his mind is a little fuzzy and he can’t quite place it. 

“Scuse me.” 

He mumbles to the man and he politely moves so Nolan can find his seat. The girl in the seat next to the window turns and looks at him, and finally it seems that he has steady ground under his feet. 

“Well, seems like I won’t text you in a couple of hours then.” 

Rory smiles at him. And he smiles back. 

“Nope you’re stuck with me for the next five and a half hours.” 

He teases and plops down in his seat. 

“What the fuck are you going to Winnipeg for though?” 

Nolan asks as he fastens his seatbelt and ignores the security instructions completely. 

“Oh I haven’t told you? My family lives there.” 

He feels flabbergasted, how in the living hell has he forgotten to ask? He always assumed she was from Philly.

“Why are you going there anyway?” 

Rory asks, but he sees the twinkle in her eyes, she’s just joking with him.

“I’m visiting my girlfriend.” 

He decides to reply dead serious. And the twinkle in her eyes disappears, a frown begins to form between her eyebrows and he instantly feels a little bad. 

“I’m- sorry, that was a really bad joke.” 

This time it seems, it’s her turn to get embarrassed. Neither of them get time to think it over though, because the plane starts accelerating and her hand immediately lands on his. He sees her jaw tense and feels her hand tighten around his knuckles. Nolan doesn’t want to comment on it though, and just lets her hold on. 

As they lift off the tarmac her hand slowly starts easing up and when they level out in the air, she seems to have realised that she’s holding his hand. Quickly she lets go, and Nolan already misses it. 

“Sorry about that, I get a little nervous about the take off.” 

She seems a little nervous to admit it, but he asks anyway. 

“How come?” 

“Oh, ever heard of the irresistible force paradox?” 

He shakes his head no, and that launches her into an explanation of what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. It’s obvious she loves theories like this, with the way she talks and moves her hands. 

“- which stems from both a chinese and a roman legend. The roman is about Zeus and how he fixed the Teumessian fox, who can never be caught, and the hound Laelaps who never misses what he hunts to the sky in constellations.” 

She stops, and Nolan really wishes she wouldn’t. Her voice is so calming yet enchanting at the same time, he could listen and learn every day for forever. 

“But wouldn’t that mean that the fox wins? because it never gets caught?” 

He questiones. 

“Exactly! I’ve been thinking about it for days now.” 

And the plane ride goes on like that, until Rory has heard of most of the flyers and Nolan knows the name of almost all her professors. It’s closer to night time when she starts to slur her words, because of tiredness. She ends up with her head on his shoulder and his hair a little bit in her face. But the weight of his head leaning against hers is priceless.  

Nolan wakes up a little bit before her and sees that they’re landing soon. So he shakes Rory awake with a promise of a date in the morning. Since they don’t live too far away from each other. And she agrees. 

They step off the plane together, collect their luggage together, Nolan’s arm slung around Rory’s shoulder, and hug each other so long, before departing to their own separate families. 

“Hey, see you tomorrow shy guy!” 

She winks at him, rendering him speechless in front of his family. His sister glances at him with a questioning look as she watches the other girl walk away. Usually few people render Nolan at a loss for words. 

[kareofbears]

plainly in truth, chapter 3/5

"Without you around, it's sorta like stuff is just kinda...bleh."

—

Or: hiding, confiding, and misguiding.

read on ao3 or below the cut :)

Ryuji grips the letter like it was silver and he was a werewolf in the full moon.

He picks it up, skims over the first line before putting it down beside him, feeling worse every time he does it, only able to read the fine-printed lettering from the flickering lamp post above him. The constant change in light would normally bug him, but he doesn’t really care about it now; it’s not like the words would change in his hand, and he’s long since needed to actually read it to know what it reads.

His feet dangle over the canal, enjoying the way a rush of adrenaline would go through him when he looks down into the deep waters. It’s late enough in the night that even with the city lights around him, he can’t gauge how deep it goes.

Soseikawa Park was only a five minute walk from Odori Park, but with the narrow river and steeped hills, Ryuji found it secluded enough to let himself sit. Breathe. Not exist, even for just a few minutes. It’s like having his own bedroom, except it smells faintly like a sewer and there’s an intersection about ten meters above where he sat underneath the overpass. If he can ignore the never-ending rumble of cars and trucks driving above him, it can almost be considered peaceful.

He lets himself fall back, the grass tickling the back of his neck and his spine screaming in relief. They’re heading out again in two days, which means more days of being in an inescapable RV surrounded by his best friends who are keeping an eye on him because they’re good people who don’t know how to mind their own fucking business.

Idly, he lets his hands pull and brings it to his face—blades of grass. He lets it get taken by the wind. After brief consideration, he shoves the letter back into his pocket before he can do the same thing to it.

He is so tired.

Blindly, he hits the vague area of where his pocket is and fishes out his phone, hitting the first speed dial before he can talk himself out of it. As two rings go by, he stupidly hopes that she doesn’t pick up, as if she hasn’t ever missed a phone call from him even when she’s at work.

The third ring gets cut off halfway through. “Ryu!”

Despite himself, he grins. “Hey, ma. Checking in for the weekly call.”

“I was just thinking about you,” she says, and he can hear the laundry machine run in the background. “I was wondering if you had eaten today.”

“Ma, you ain’t gotta worry about that kinda thing anymore. I’m a big boy now.”

“You’re breaking my heart!” He can almost see her, phone tucked in the crook of her neck, work-worn hands folding her laundry as fast as she can so as to not hold up the next person in line. “It doesn’t matter how big you are, you’re my boy. How can I not think about whether my boy is eating or not?”

“All I’ve done on this trip is eat, ma.”

“Oh, and Akira! How’s that handsome boy doing? Still taking the world by storm?”

That pulls a genuine laugh from him—he never needs to hold back when it comes to talking about Akira, at least. “You know it. He’s the only guy in the world who can stand toe-to-toe with me in chowing down. I swear, he’s slipping some of it under the table ‘cause he’s so damn fast. Forty seconds! Forty seconds to inhale an extra large beef bowl! Blows my mind, seriously.”

“Could never do anything in halves, can he?” she chuckles, before the quality of her voice shifts. “And are you enjoying yourself?”

He hesitates. “Yeah, of course. It’s a roadtrip across Japan, how can I not?”

“Good.” There’s some crackling over the receiver, and he guesses she’s probably adjusting the basket full of clothes on her hip. “That’s all I want to hear. As long as you’re happy, Ryu, I’m a happy old woman.”

Ryuji opens his mouth, ready to console her.

I’m always happy!

You worry too much, ma.

There’s nothing to worry about.

“Sorry, but,” he swallows thickly. “I think they’re calling for me? So—”

“Alright,” she says, and he might be imagining the disappointed tinge to it. “Call back when you can, okay sweetheart? I miss you.”

“I miss you too,” he clears his throat. “I love you, ma.”

“I love you too, Ryu.”

He hangs up, letting the phone slip out of his fingers. It lands hard on the flat grass

For a long moment, he just lays there, listening to the gentle lapping waves and cars honking with impatience of people who have somewhere to be. He tries to meditate for half a minute, with all the information he had learned from a couple of YouTube videos, and gives up, because of course he does. Squeezing his eyes shut, he can’t do anything about the creeping dread that’s in his stomach getting stronger, squeezing and squeezing until he feels sick. It’s like his insecurities are having this huge fight against each other, feeding off of one another until it gets too big for him to handle and all he can do is breathe and try to do something about it.

And he’s fucking sick of it—breathing. He’s sick of the stupid breathing techniques, sick of counting down from ten and waiting for his own heart to chill out because his brain won’t stop reminding him of everything he did wrong, of shit he’s still doing wrong because at least this way, nobody knows what he did was wrong. It’s just him that can point and laugh at himself, and that’s way better than having the world do it for him.

He doesn’t cry, because he’s not a crier. He’s the type of guy to throw a fist through drywood before shedding a tear, and he hates that about himself. Rather than do something that will actually help, Ryuji lays there, perfectly still. Listening. Waiting for a meteor to fall on him, or for the overpass to crash its entire weight on top of him.

Instead, he hears footsteps.

His heart rate slows by a fraction, and opens his eyes to meet gray ones. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Akira says, a smile in his voice. “How did you know it was me?”

Ryuji almost feels offended. He would know Akira by sound alone, the way his heels would click in the Metaverse. The way the balls of his feet would strike the earth, hardly muffled by grass or cheap sneakers or anything else as trivial. Ryuji would know he was there; no matter how blind he was with hatred for himself, his love for Akira would always guide him back to where he needs to be.

“Lucky guess.”

“One hell of a guess.” He plops down onto the grass and Ryuji lifts his head, allowing Akira to wiggle until he could use his lap as a pillow. “Your turn,” Akira says.

“My turn to what?”

“To ask me how I knew where you were.”

“Oh.” He lets his eyes slide shut again. “I kinda just assumed you could do that.”

“You assume too much of me sometimes.”

“I assume the right amount.” Ryuji refuses to shiver when he feels long fingers start to card through his hair. “You’re giving me goosebumps,” he sighs.

“That’s a good thing, I think.” The fingers pull away and he’s about to complain when he feels something gets thrown over his torso. “Here. You always end up forgetting to wear an extra layer when you go out like this.”

Ryuji rearranges Akira’s jacket over himself. “Sap.”

“You know it.” He resumes combing through his hair, and Ryuji lets himself relax, just a little. It’s strange—it’s hard as hell being around other people nowadays, and even though Akira can make him feel that sometimes, mostly it helps the eternal twisting of his stomach to settle.

“You’re good at that,” Ryuji mutters.

“Thank you. I’ve had plenty of practice with Morgana.” And just to make it worse, he uses a little bit of nail on his nape, sending electricity running down all the way to his fingertips.

His mouth twists unhappily. “Don’t do shit like that while talking about the cat, for the love of god.”

Akira does it again, like the little shit he is. “You still have that weird thing with your neck?”

“Quit it!” Ryuji slaps his thigh and he can’t muster much anger when he can feel Akira’s shoulders shake from silent laughter. “You’re not as funny as you think you are.”

“You’re right.” Gently, softly, like the world’s lightest feather, he feels lips brush his temple. “I’m funnier.”

His eyes open, and his entire vision is obscured by curly black hair and tender eyes. “You’re right,” he breathes. “You’re funnier.”

Akira bends down again, and Ryuji catches his lips, overflowing with something soft but unafraid, and it’s so good that Ryuji reaches for his cheek just to make it last a little bit longer.

When they break off, Akira kisses his temple again, this time on the left side. “Do you know what day it is?”

“Uh,” he scratches his head, brain a little fuzzy. “Tuesday?”

“It’s Wednesday, and I meant the date. It’s August tenth.”

“Okay?”

Akira thumbs at his collarbone. “I know this might be a little lame that I know it by heart, but I left Tokyo on March 19th. That would mean it’s been—”

“One hundred forty-four days since you moved away,” he finishes. “I know.”

Akira blinks, and then laughs, and Ryuji knows it’s an especially good one because sound actually comes out this time. “Yes,” he says, elated. “Exactly what I was thinking.”

“I told you dude, we’re really on that telepathy shit.”

“We really are.” A pause. “I miss you.”

He’s about to joke—I’m right here, you big dummy—but find that he just can’t. “I miss you too.”

They can’t say what they mean: I will miss you. Summer vacation doesn’t last forever, and two months will always be a hell of a lot shorter than the rest of the ten months that they’ll be apart. Somehow, he dreads seeing Akira gone, and he’ll dread seeing Akira back in Tokyo because it would mean that he’d actually have to see what Ryuji’s really like. Actively pushing away his best friend just so he doesn’t have to see his failures; doesn’t that just make him the worst piece of shit in the world?

There’s a gap, though. A little loophole. A crack in the timeline. A place where maybe he’s allowed to be a hollowed out version of happy; the now.

“Tomorrow’s our last day in Sapporo?”

“Yeah?” Akira replies, surprised at the change in tone.

“Which means Jail stuff is done, right? All your grocery shopping and Sophia Prime’s been ordered and packed up?”

“Yes,” he says, a lilt in his voice. “It’s all done.”

Ryuji sits up and faces him, reaching for his wrists, relishing in the heartbeat thumping against his palms. “Let’s do something. I don’t care what, but let’s do something. Eat at a diner, go to a museum, rob a bank, whatever.” He runs his thumb along the veins there, long since those bumps have been ingrained in his brain. “Let’s do something, just you and me.”

“Are you asking me out on a date, Sakamoto?” He has a cocky look in his eye, and Ryuji’s half-tempted to kiss him again just to wipe it clean off his face. “You know I’d follow you anywhere.”

He knows. That’s the scary part. Would Akira still follow someone he doesn’t know as well as he thinks he does? “I’ll get us lost,” he jokes.

Akira doesn’t laugh. “I’d rather be lost with you than learn to lose you.”

It’s been ages since he’s been flustered at anything Akira does, but he feels a rush of heat crawl up his neck. “I’ll—” Ryuji shakes his head, willing his embarrassment to go away. “Shit, uh—”

“I’ll pick where to go,” he interrupts, a little too smug for his liking. “I’d say I’ll pick you up at your place, but…”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re a comedian,” Ryuji rolls his eyes. “I’ll be ready whenever.”

“Fantastic.” Akira checks his phone, wincing. “It’s late.”

He grips his wrist tightly. “I know.”

Thankfully, he’s never needed to explain much to Akira. “Okay,” he says softly. “Ten more minutes?”

“Yeah.” He lets his eyes slide shut once more, letting out a breath. The world will keep spinning. His stomach will keep twisting. Time will keep marching on, but at least he has this. “Ten minutes sounds good.”

—

The first words that Futaba says as she enters the RV was: “Oh, hell.”

“Hello Futaba-chan, Yusuke-kun,” Haru greets cheerfully from the booth. “How was your shopping trip?”

“...Fine,” she replies, stepping aside to let him in, lugging a four-foot tall canvas in his arms that accidentally hits the ceiling. “Got a new Featherman action figure.”

“I got a canvas,” Yusuke answers from behind the wall of white. “Though I assume you can see that.”

“I can.” Her smile doesn’t falter, and it’s making the hair on Futaba’s nape rise like a nervous animal. “Quick question, since you both are here…”

Haru pulls a tote bag from underneath the table, and it’s so heavy that when she throws it on the table, her teacup nearly topples over. “Would you like to take a guess of what’s in this bag?”

A billion jokes pop into Futaba’s head, but both of them stay silent, terrified and confused. They both knew this was coming, but they didn’t expect her to be so forward about it.

“I suppose that’s a pretty strange question, I’m sorry. Let me try again.” She reaches in and pulls out thick, heavy textbooks, all brightly coloured and consist of beaming, diverse students on the front cover. “Care to tell me why you were both looking at cram books while we’re on our fun roadtrip?”

Yusuke pushes Futaba aside, eyes on the books and wide with shock. “You bought them?!” he exclaims.

“Wait—” Futaba hops repeatedly, trying to catch a glimpse from over his shoulder. “You bought all of them?”

“Of course.”

“But why?”

She thinks about it for a moment. “Hmm, think about it this way. If Akira’s in charge of the group as a whole, and Makoto’s in charge of the more analytical aspect of things, think of me as a somewhat stern yet loving parent who doesn’t quite know how to mind their own business.”

“I thought that was Ann’s job,” Futaba mutters, heart hammering in her chest.

“Now,” Haru leans forward, and as if to prove her role, speaks in a gentle tone. “I’m not mad at you. That would be ridiculous. But I saw you two looking at these books, and I know how expensive they can be, so I’ll give them to you.”

She blinks. “You would?”

“Absolutely!” Haru smiles wide. “On the condition that you tell me why you need them.”

Futaba and Yusuke exchange a glance, before Futaba makes a T with her hands. “Timeout!” she yells, dragging Yusuke by the collar out of the RV.

“What do we do?” he whispers once the door is shut. “It’s not as if we can tell her.”

“I don’t know, maybe we should?” she pushes up her glasses. “Damn, the things money can buy you. Our vow of silence is getting thrown out the window for two handfuls of yen.”

He looks her dead in the eyes. “I would tell the world my deepest secrets if it meant having lifetime access to a grocery store.”

“Don’t say that, you sellout!”

“I’m not selling out. My art already reveals the deepest portion of my soul, it’s not my fault that the common observers cannot pick up what I’m putting down.” He squints against the setting sun. “She’s waiting. What do we do?”

“Okay, okay, okay, just let me—” her mind whirrs rapidly, and for a second she really feels like Sophia. “Give me a second.”

“I have a suggestion,” he points at her. “If we’re not averse to lying, let’s tell them that you need them for school. You’re struggling with academics, you need a bit of outside help, so we took a look at the textbooks.”

“Good idea! Wait.” She frowns. “They’ll never buy it. Let’s say that you need them.”

“I’m at the top of my class!”

“But they don’t know that!” She balls her fists together, determined. “Okay, let’s do this.”

“I didn’t say yes to this.”

Futaba kicks the door open, making Haru pause wiping her spilt drink mid-stroke. “Inari’s struggling with his classes!”

“I—“ Yusuke stammers. “Yes,” he confirms. “I’m struggling with my classes. They’re mighty indeed, and even I find them difficult. I am...struggling.”

Haru looks at them doubtfully. “Yusuke is?”

“I am,” he answers as Futaba says, “He is.”

“Yusuke,” she repeats, gesturing to the neatly-stacked pile of textbooks on the table. “Is struggling with precalculus?”

They stare at her. “Yes,” Yusuke says, slowly. “I am struggling with previous calculus.”

“Out of curiosity, Yusuke,” Haru scratches her cheek. “Do you know what a parabola is?”

“Of course I do,” he replies with the wisdom of a thousand monks. “It’s a self-contradictory statement.”

“That’s a paradox,” Makoto corrects from the steering wheel.

“What the heck?” Futaba jumps a foot in the air. “Why are you here? Why were you hiding?”

“I like to sit here a few hours before we start another road trip,” she says, before glaring at them. “You two. Does this have to do with Ryuji?”

“T-timeout!”

Futaba makes a beeline to the door again, but Haru’s faster. She slips past them, standing in their way, perfect smile still in place. Sometimes Futaba forgets how strong she is in negotiations; her and Yusuke were probably tutorial levels compared to the upper management of Okumura Foods. “Answer her question, please.”

Yusuke sighs, tired. “You know what you’re asking for, don’t you? If we tell you what’s happening here, it would be breaking the trust of one of our teammates.”

“Yusuke!” Futaba hisses. “Are you really thinking about telling them? It’s not even our secret to tell.”

“No, it isn’t.” He makes eye contact with Makoto. “But she made a point. What would make us better friends: if we kept a secret to the grave while letting him suffer, or tell someone who can help even if it means being some sort of tattletale?”

“But…” she trails off, resolve crumbling. “Dude. It’s going to suck so much.”

“I know.” He pats her head, before moving to Ryuji’s backpack once more. “Don’t worry, I’m willing to take his anger if need be.” Yusuke gestures to the booth. “Everyone, take a seat. It’s about time this finally gets cleared up.”

Smoothing out the envelope in his hand, even more crumpled than when they had it last, he clears his throat, takes one last glance at Futaba to make sure. At her tentative nod, he begins to read its contents in a loud, clear voice.

When he finishes, they sit there, staring at the thick paper in silence.

“Oh my god,” Makoto breathes. “I knew it was bad, but—”

Haru shakes her head. “Not this bad. And he talked about it so much, but we didn’t even…” she glances down at the textbooks, idly rubbing its spine. “I didn’t think much of it.”

“None of us did,” Yusuke says. “But does that make it any better?”

They fall in silence again, but Futaba can hear the answer loud and clear. Hell no.

The door opens forcefully, pulling them out of their stupor.

“What’s up, my beloved friends!” Ann calls, shopping bags in tow. “God, I’m gonna miss Sapporo. Things here are so cheap compared to Tokyo, sheesh!” She sets them down, laughing when nobody says anything. “Jeez, what’s going on? Did I miss something?”

“Ann-chan,” Haru says carefully, all sense of cheer, for intimidation or otherwise, gone. “Take a seat. There’s something you should know.”

—

The Ferris wheel looms over them, blocking out most of the sunset behind it. “Nice,” Ryuji grins appreciatively. “I should’ve seen this one coming.”

“You should’ve,” Akira agrees, tugging him into the open carriage. He goes in willingly. “It was staring at you the whole time we’re in Sapporo. And besides, every romantic movie has a Ferris wheel scene, doesn’t it?”

“Oh yeah? Name one.”

“Death note.”

Ryuji makes a face, and Akira laughs. “Yeah, I know. Bad example.”

It’s a tight squeeze but they sit next to each other, ignoring the bench in front of them. The seats are hot, and even though it’s nearly evening, the heat barely eases up on them. Still, he finds himself pressing himself against Akira. He runs cold, much colder than Ryuji; narrow wrists are ice, prominent collarbones frost.

The two of them lean over the window, pointing out random scenery as if it were the first time they were seeing them. Restaurants, statues. Weird looking cars and flower beds. Decorated high rises and insects that fly by. It’s like they were tourists, or a retired couple who just want to travel the world. He’s never wanted to be old before, but Akira always has a way of making him change his mind.

Like clockwork—Ryuji makes a joke. Akira laughs. His heart feels lighter.

When he finds himself leaning against him, feet up on the bench, Akira wraps his arms around his shoulders unhesitatingly. Ryuji wonders if he can hear the way his heart thuds inside his bones. He wonders if he knows it's for him. The Ferris wheel stops, right at the very top, gently swaying like it were a giant cradle. They’re not very high up, but it’s far enough that he feels like he’s left the entire world behind.

Ryuji presses his lips against those wrists, relishing in the way he can feel the heartbeat increase. “You nervous?”

He can feel his head shake behind him. “I’m happy, I think,” Akira says in a hushed voice, like it was a secret, like it was a sin.

A breeze flows through, and Ryuji closes his eyes when lips press against just below his ear.

Would it be worth it to have a Palace? A Jail? Would it be worth it to lose himself, just to be in this moment for the rest of time?

Carefully, he flips himself sideways, just so he can press more of himself against Akira. The carriage rocks gently, and the metal bench underneath them is sharp and uncomfortable. Arms tighten around him. Chest to back, knee to knee, they couldn’t be closer, but Ryuji leans back, wanting nothing more than to bottle the rhythm of his breathing and the smell of his soap.

I’m happy, too, I think, he wants to say. If we stayed like this for the rest of our lives, until our skin is permanently tattooed into the hot steel and our bones are the only thing they take out of this bench because the rest of us had already rotted, then I’d be pretty damn happy.

Craning his neck backwards, Akira is already staring.

Then he’s kissing him—once, twice, again and again, and Ryuji realizes that something’s different. This wasn’t the kind of kiss he was used to. There was a desperate air to it, an urgent edge from both of them that neither was ready for. Stealing each other’s breath and giving it back; the cycle continues, the clock keeps ticking.

Ryuji pulls himself up, not breaking the kiss, cupping his cheek and soaking him in like a flower to the sun; an endless yearning, like he’d shrivel up and suffocate if it vanished. The sun framed Akira, and for a split second, he feels like he understands what Yusuke sees on a canvas.

When they part, foreheads leaning against each other, Ryuji lifts a trembling hand to wipe the tear that rolled down Akira’s cheek.

“What’s up?” he asks softly. “Is something wrong?”

“I feel like you’re a miracle, Ryuji.”

How do you respond to that? When the person who said it feels like they’re the one who’s magic, who’s too good to be true?

“Fuck miracles,” he says, pulling Akira in again.

—

The circuit felt like it ended too soon, but it’s night when they finally stepped off, holding hands and faces flushed. He hopes the ride operator doesn’t hate them, but he’s in too good of a mood to really complain.

Ryuji stops in his tracks when he sees who’s in front of them.

“Ann?” Akira questions, taken aback. Eyes dark and brows pulled close together, clutching her purse like a weapon of war—she looks like she’d just seen someone set an orphanage on fire.

Her voice is shockingly deep, gaze fixed on Ryuji. “I’m borrowing him for a second.”

Before either of them can say anything, Ann takes him by the bicep, and he can only glance at Akira before he’s dragged back into the Ferris wheel.

“Did you even pay—?”

“Don’t start,” she hisses, pushing him on the bench, hard. “Don’t you dare start, you damn liar.”

His blood runs cold. “What?”

No. That’s impossible.

“Don’t play dumb with me.” She shoves her hand in her bag and throws something rubber at him. “Do you know how long it took me to find a good one here? I spent my entire day in the shopping district—not looking for clothes, or shoes, or whatever the hell I thought would be fun. No, I spent our last day in Sapporo looking for that.”

Ryuji looks down at the hot compress in his hands, a lump in his throat.

“Because you weren’t doing anything to your knee,” she continues, jaw tight. “Despite me trying my best to help you get better. I thought that you must’ve been really fan-freaking-tastic at hiding the pain that you told me about. That I trusted was the truth because you’re one of my best friends and I trust you. I trust you with my life, my secrets—” Ann grits her teeth. “What the hell?”

“How did you find out?” he asks hoarsely.

She knows. If she knows, they could know. If they could know—

“Damn you, it doesn’t matter how I found out!” she throws her hands in the air, voice so hurt that it twists his insides impossibly tighter. “You think I would care? You think that this is important enough to lie to me about? Dammit, I don’t care that you—”

“Don’t say it,” he begs. “Please.”

“I don’t give a single shit that you failed second-year, Sakamoto!”

Her words ring against the steel walls, deafening.

Bile crawls up his esophagus, and he readies himself for another attack. But for some strange reason, his vision doesn’t blur. Instead, anger kicks in like it always does.

“You don’t care?” he asks, incredulous. “This doesn’t even have anything to do with you!”

“It does when you lie to me about it!” she yells back. “Do you not care about me? About your friends who would go to hell and back for you?”

“How dare you—!”

“You lied to me, you hid it from everyone else, you ignored our advice because it doesn’t mean shit to you.” She points a finger at him. “And look where that got you.”

“Shut up.”

“We all noticed, you know! Each and every one of us noticed that something was up, even the literal robot—”

“Shut the hell up, Ann.”

“And for what? All you accomplished was hurt our feelings, hold in yours, and keep it from the love of your life—”

Ryuji stands up, rocking the carriage and nearly toppling Ann off her feet.

“It’s because I fucking hate myself!”

She grips the barred window, eyes wide. They stare each other down for a few long moments, before the ride comes to an abrupt end. The door swings open, allowing a cheery greeting from the oblivious employee.

And then Ann sighs, shoulders deflating. “Come on,” she jerks her head to the door, before stepping out herself. “Let’s go.”

“What?” he asks, puzzled. “Where?”

“If we’re going to delve into the psyche of Sakamoto Ryuji, we might as well do it with some food in front of us.”

—

The cafe Ann takes him to is bright, filled with pastries and crowded with people—stools are pastel blue, baristas are wearing cute bowties, and each cup of coffee comes with an alarming amount of whipped cream on top. Sojiro would have a heart attack if he walked three kilometers of this place, but Ryuji’s glad that the resemblance is far and away than that of Leblanc.

The booth is pressed into the corner of it all; up against the window and far enough from the main bustle that they’d have to really put their all into it if they wanted to take their order. On one side sat Futaba, nervously tracing shapes on the window while Haru sits beside her. The opposite end has Yusuke and Makoto.

They all look up when they hear the bell chime, and Ryuji almost laughs. “It’s been a long ass time since I’ve seen you guys look so serious,” he remarks, sliding next to Makoto while Ann sits next to Haru. “Where’s the food at? Come on guys, food’s good for you.”

He raises a hand. “Excuse me! We’re ready!”

“Ryuji,” Futaba’s voice is brittle. “I—”

“Hold on shorty,” he reaches to pat her head, voice coming out soft. “We’ll get to that. I promise.”

A waiter comes, takes their drink order, and leaves. When he does, Yusuke places a heavy hand on the table. “I was the one who told everyone.”

“That’s not true!” Futaba cries out, and everyone jerks back in shock. “That’s bull! I’m the one who told him to go through your stuff ‘cause he was worried about you, but I’m the one who actually—”

“No, I’m the one at fault here,” Haru casts her gaze downwards. “It was really none of my business, but I forced these two to tell everyone here. I’m so sorry—”

Ryuji sighs. “Guys, it’s fine.” He’s met with an incredulous look. “Okay, it isn’t, but none of this is your fault, you know? I’m not mad.” His gaze shifts to Ann. “But you’re allowed to be mad at me. I know I shouldn’t have hidden it.”

She gives him a weighted look. “Then why did you do it?”

“Ann,” Makoto warns.

“No, I’m not budging on this.” She leans forward. “He lied to me. Lying doesn’t get you anywhere good. That was really stupid of you.”

“Ann!” Futaba cuts in, horrified.

“You’ve seen what happened with Shiho.” Ryuji flinches back like he’s been hit. He knows. Ann knows he knows. But she keeps going anyway. “She lied to me about what was happening, and I lied to her back. It kept going and going, and—” she snaps her fingers. “She’s gone from my life. For how long? I don’t know, maybe until we graduate. Maybe until her rehab ends. Maybe longer. Who knows? All I know is if we had just—talked, or—” Ann shakes her head, frustrated. “From the start. Tell us what happened. And afterwards, let us help you, or I swear to god I’m going to cry, and I know you can’t stand it when people cry.”

The silence is deafening, even with the clamor of people and voices around them.

Ryuji lets out a breath. “Yeah, alright.”

She raises an eyebrow. “You will?”

“I will,” he repeats, idly checking his pulse. Heart rate is a little quick, but in no danger of having another breakdown. “I’ll tell you everything.”

The waiter chooses that time to drop off their drinks; all cold except Haru, nursing a hot cup of tea. They definitely didn’t buy enough to justify the god-knows-how-long they’re going to spend here, but they’re just gonna have to suck it up.

“Alright,” he starts when they’re alone again. “We going from the start?”

“The very beginning,” Ann confirms.

With one last glance at his friends, he sighs, sits up straight, and flashes them the biggest grin he can muster:

“Hi,” he greets. “I’m Sakamoto Ryuji, and I failed my second-year of high school.”

No one’s expression shifts, not even an inch. He can’t help but be a little impressed. “You guys know that I’ve never been the greatest with books. Shit, screw greatest—I’ve ranked bottom five ever since I started middle school. Didn’t help that my leg got fucked to high heaven and everyone started hating me. Nearly dropped out a couple times. Had no one, really. Worst time in my life, hands down.

“So imagine this dumb little kid, middle of April, running into this guy.” Without meaning to, the grin shifts into something more genuine. “Good-looking dude, super smart, real charmer but you wouldn’t be able to tell just by lookin’ at him. And that guy saved my life. Ten, twenty, thirty times over. He was so great that the dumb kid obviously fell in love with him. But what’s even crazier is that the guy fell in love with the dumb little kid, too.

“Crazy, right? Sounds made up, but I promise it’s true.” He catches Futaba’s expression shift to exasperation. “I know, I can’t believe it either.”

“That’s not what I meant, you sap,” she says.

“Yeah, but that dumb little kid,” he explains. “Couldn’t believe it. Literally couldn’t believe it. Thinks that he struck the lottery, struck by damn lightning. I mean—” Ryuji laughs a little. “How can someone so amazing and cool be in love with such a moron? What made it worse…”

He gestures at all of them. “Was that the guy had so many people in his life who was also amazing. His social circle was made up of, and correct me if I’m wrong: a successful journalist, a politician, some dude from the mob, a random child who breaks gaming records on the daily, and I’m not even counting people from this goddamn table. So dumb little kid knows, he fucking knows that somehow, someway, he tricked the cool guy into falling in love with him. The kid sucked, no, sucks,” he corrects. “At everything. Can’t do anything worthwhile.”

“Ryuji…” Haru whispers.

“Almost done, I know it’s running on kinda long,” he promises. “So the dumb little kid became kinda obsessed with the group’s ‘activities’, and it’s obvious why he would, right? If he knows he’s not good enough for the guy he’s in love with, then he can at least try to be. But since he already sucked at school to begin with, dummy over here completely bailed on school and ended up flunking so bad that he failed an entire year.”

An entire year. An entire year.

It’s becoming harder and harder to breathe, but he’d rather get hit by a truck than lose it in front of so many people. Gritting his teeth, he does what he knows is bad, what every google search and YouTube video says you should not do—he pushes his feelings, far and hard away from himself, so far that it’s like it doesn’t even exist.

It works surprisingly well.

“And, uh—” Ryuji clears his throat. “He hid it. Because you know the one, single thing that’s worse than realizing you’re not good enough for the other person?”

No one answers. “Waiting for the day that they realize that you’re not good enough for them.”

“And that’s pretty much the bulk of it.” Reaching for his mug, he takes a sip of his lukewarm lemonade. Damn, he really did talk for a while. “I didn’t want to tell the rest of you because one, it’s really fucking embarrassing that I failed, and two—”

“Akira can’t know,” they all say in unison.

“Exactly, you guys get the point by now.” He drums his fingers against the table, trying to ignore the blatant gloom cast on all of their faces. “Question time starts now, if anyone wants to ask anything.”

Makoto opens her mouth, but he beats her to it. “If anyone even thinks about feeling pity, or be all ‘no, you’re smart actually!’, I am walking out of this cafe and I am not looking back.”

“What about summer school?” Makoto asks immediately. “If you didn’t want us to know, then you could’ve taken that without even telling us.”

“Summer school was never an option.”

“And why not?” she slaps her hand against the table. “It would’ve solved this entire situation!”

“Because Akira was coming home for the summer,” he says simply. “And I wanted to enjoy my time with him without this hanging over my head.”

Her jaw drops open. “But...that’s…”

“Stupid?” he offers. “Idiotic? Really dumb? Potentially throwing away my entire future? Yeah, I gotcha. Another part of it was that the thought of staying at Shujin for another minute makes me want to jump into traffic, if that helps make me look a little better in your mind, miss prez.”

Makoto’s expression of confusion freezes, taken aback by the harshness of his words. Ryuji cringes at himself. “Sorry.”

“No,” she says finally. “The fault is mine. I have no right to judge your actions, or to pretend I know what kind of stress is burdening you.” Hesitating, she asks, “May I request another question?”

“Shoot.”

“What were you going to do when we eventually go back to Tokyo?”

As expected of someone who went head-to-head against the ace detective in front of the entire school; her questions are brutal. “I don’t know, honestly. I was planning on ignoring the problem for now and just sort of,” he gestures vaguely. “Enjoy the summertime sun?”

“A moment,” Haru goes through her bag. “It’s a long story, but I have these—”

The second the books peek out of her tote, he recognizes the cover immediately. “Cram books? You bought some?”

“Yes!” she answers, mistaking his reaction for eagerness. “It’s a very small gesture, but I’d love for you to have them.”

“I—” he leans away from them, breath catching in his throat. “No.”

“No?” she blinks.

“Not now, senpai.” Trying out his new trick again, he forces his heart to slow down, forces his breathing to regulate again without any of the techniques, and forces himself not to feel any of the fear that he’d normally have to go through. It works, but barely. “I’m not—I don’t think I’m ready to deal with that yet.”

“That’s fine.” Haru puts them away, and as hard as he tries, he can still see how dejected she was. “I’ll hold on to them for you.”

“Thank you.” He glances around. “Any last takers? Q&A is almost up.”

“I have one,” Yusuke pipes up.

“Go for it.”

“How are you?” he asks genuinely.

Ryuji can’t help it—a laugh gets pulled out of him. “How am I?” he repeats.

“Yes. How are you?”

“Uh,” he laughs again. “Not good, man. Not good.”

Everyone startles when Ryuji stands abruptly. He slams down the rest of his lemonade, relieved at how it helps his parched throat. “Alrighty, that took a lot out of me! Let’s get out of here, I’m sick of being surrounded by fake coffee and poser cafe fanatics.”

“I’ll take care of the bill,” Haru says, following his lead and scooting out from the booth.

“What? No, come on. I don’t care how rich you are, at least let me pay half.”

“Ryuji.” She looks him dead in the eye. “I’ll take care of the bill.”

“...Yes ma’am.”

Slowly, they all start filing out, some exiting the cafe while Makoto goes to the till with Haru. Ryuji reaches for Ann’s elbow before she can leave. “Hey.”

Turning her head, it’s as if her lips were permanently stitched downwards. “Yeah?”

“I’m really sorry I lied to you,” he says, somber. “That was shitty, and it doesn’t matter what I’m going through—you can’t deal with lies. I get that. I won’t put you through that again.”

Ann kisses her palm before slapping it against his forehead. “You better not,” her voice drips in affection. “You said not to console you—”

“I did, and I meant it.”

“But I’m here for you,” she rubs his skin harder, and he winces at the chafing. “You know that, right? No matter how crazy the shit inside your head gets, I want you to talk to me.”

“I know it,” he says, not just because he wants the friction to ease up. “I know it now, for sure.”

“Good.” Ann releases him, and goes to join Haru and Makoto up front. “You might want to head out. Someone’s starting to make a fuss.”

“What?” he turns around, making direct eye contact with Futaba, nursing a blank expression on her face. “I see.”

The bell chimes once more when he steps out, relieved at the cool summer air that hits him. “Shorty,” he says in lieu of a greeting. “What’s good?”

“Here.” Ryuji glances down at her, who’s holding a familiar, now very-crumpled envelope between her fingers. It’s weird seeing her hold the letter announcing his failure like a bomb, but he understands the sentiment. “I had to show Ann because she wouldn’t believe me until I got some proof.”

“Thank you,” he says, shoving it in his pocket. “I’m not mad at you, you know.”

“I know you’re not.” She swallows and stares down at her shoes. Her laces were covered in little beads and stars, something he had bought for her during a weekend hangout once. “This isn’t me pitying you, or showering you with some kind of boohoo potion.”

She swallows again. “I failed my first year of high school. It was for a completely different reason—guilt for who I thought I killed rather than wanting to be something else. But I know. I know so much about what you’re going through.”

Futaba looks up, and his heart wrenches when he sees the tears in her eyes. “I’m so, so sorry if I made you sad, or that I kept calling you stupid back then,” she sobs. “I don’t mean it, and I’m so mean to you all of the time but I don’t mean any of it. I told everyone your secret because I wanted to—” she hiccups, and she pushes her glasses to the top of her head. “I wanted to give you your own version of what the Phantom Thieves did for me, but I reached out to you guys back then. No one forced me to do anything, but I took that choice away from you.”

He pulls her in his arms, and her tears are hot even through his shirt. “I know, Futaba,” he says, patting her head. “Thank you for taking care of me.”

She hits his chest weakly. “Me taking care of you?” she sniffs. “I’m literally the one crying right now.”

“Just for now though,” he shrugs. “Next time I cry, you’ll be the one handing me tissues, I swear.”

They stand there, the two of them standing in the middle of Sapporo while people give them weird looks—Futaba, unable to stop the tears from flowing down her cheeks, and Ryuji, refusing to ever let his emotions make things worse for everyone else again.

—

When they get back to the RV, each of them emotionally exhausted, Ryuji goes to kiss the top of Akira’s head. “Hi.”

“Hey,” Akira looks up from his card game with Morgana and Sophia. “You look like you had a wild night. Ann take you all somewhere fun?”

“Totally,” he says, sliding the letter back in his backpack. “Best night ever.”

“Take me next time. Sophia’s kicking our ass.”

“She is not!” Morgana denies, tail swishing. “Just a little,” he relents.

“I’m gonna get ready for bed,” Ryuji announces, hiking his backpack on his shoulders and heading out, before running into Ann outside.

“Oh my god,” she says, disturbed. “He really, really doesn’t know.”

“Yup,” he moves past her. “And we’re keeping it that way.”

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression, radio version - Ep 43, July 2016 - Inadequate election coverage by media, Increase in motiveless crime.

Kaoru starts this episode by saying how its still really hot. Joe mentions that its only going to get hotter over the next few weeks, and asks Kaoru if he hates Summer. Kaoru says he hates Summer and Winter. He prefers Spring and Autumn, and will absolutely not be attending any summer fireworks displays or other such summer events. Everyone has summer vacation time, so not matter where you go, its hot, and there are people everywhere. He hates this.

Kaoru then moves on to talk about the new single Utafumi, in particular the special site that has been set up for it. Upon entering the site, the phrase 3分10秒間の痛み (3mins10secs of pain) appears on screen. This short phrase gives off a kind of instant power, but Kaoru wonders what Joe actually thinks of the song. Firstly, says Joe, the song contains an effortless feel, and does have an instantaneous power to it. For some inexplicable reason, he also feels like the song is enjoyable to listen to. Joe also picks up on something that he said during his Rolling Stone interview with Kaoru the previous week, which is that Dir en grey is very multifaceted when it comes to expression. Just as there a many different angles from which to view a Picaso painting, Joe views Dir's music in the same way. He fell in love with its multi-dimensional sound after seeing the last tour and listening to Utafumi, and wants to delve deeper into it. Kaoru expresses his thanks at such words, and explains that Utafumi is a kind of step in the direction towards the new album. He asks everyone to look forward to that.

Next they welcome Tasai for the Tokyo Sports corner. The first thing Tasai does is apologise for Hiranabe bringing a young woman with him on the last show. To Tasai, its unthinkable to bring a girlfriend to work. Kaoru says he was honestly pretty shocked.

Tasai's first topic relates to the House of Councillors elections, and how all TV stations run election specials on the night after the election has finished. The tv personality Dave Spector has questioned why Japan never shows such election specials on TV before an election. Surely it would be better to get all the info out there to the voters before the election takes place? Joe elaborates on this problem by bringing up the movie 'Pacchigi!/Break through!', by director Izutsu Kazuyuki. Joe had talked with the producer of the movie, who is a Korean resident of Japan. The movie deals with the conflict between a Korean school in Japan and the local Japanese teens. The producer told Joe that advertising the movie was very tough. He had paid a lot of money to a certain tv station for a CM spot, and wanted to use a clip from the one of thr climaxes of the movie where the Korean female lead character (played by Sawajiri Erika) says to the Japanese boy who likes her, 'If you and I were to be together always, can you become Korean?'. Despite being approved by the ethics committee, the tv channel wouldn't accept it. When the movie was promoted on the radio, the director and producer pushed really hard to be able to play the Korean song 'Imjin River', which appears in the movie, but at the last minute, the radio station refused to play it. This illustrates that the media are the most conservative ones out there. Japan needs its media to change first before other change can happen. Tasai adds that there is no law forbidding detailed coverage before an election in Japan, this is entirely self imposed control. Although the likes of Ikegami Akira play an important role in bringing political issues to the forefront, there is still a large build up of frustration surrounding elections in Japan. Kaoru states that if the media did cover elections thoroughly before voting took place, they would be much easier to understand. Joe agrees, saying that if people developed an interest in the small details of the situation, it might be a catalyst for them to check out the actions of political parties in more depth. Kaoru replies that a lot more fishy businesses would come up to the surface if that was the case.

Tasai admits that there are other ways to get information, for example on the internet, but TV is still currently the big one. The only rule is that they are not allowed to tell viewers directly to vote for or not vote for a specific candidate. But there is nothing stopping them from presenting all the information there is, and telling viewers to make thier own decision before an election. Joe wonders which media outlet will ever be the first one to take this step. It will be a very important move if it happens. Tasai thinks it is currently still quite difficult for a tv station to be able to do this. He  also thinks that another important point in relation to the recent election is that young people didn't vote. Kaoru agrees, and says changes in the media would make everything easier to understand for them. Tasai says that in one previous House of Councillors election, the number of voters over age 60 was 12 million, wheras the number of voters in thier 20s in the same election was only 4million. The politicians are therefore always talking about the interests of the elderly..pensions etc, which people in thier 20s don't connect with. Tasai makes a plea for any listerners of this show who are in thier 20s to please go out and vote at election time. Kaoru echoes this sentiment. Joe say politics needs to be more future facing, and brings up the case of a country who did an experiment giving voting rights to 0 year old babies. Thier parents would vote for them in a way which they thought best represented thier future interests.

Kaoru coments that an online voting system is also needed to meet the reality of this younger generation. Tasai thinks that online voting will become a possibility in the near future. Joe comments that given the advanced state of technology in this day and age, an online voting system should not be that hard to organize. At the same time, Kaoru says he does enjoy going to vote in person at the local elementary school (*voting stations are often set up at elementary schools in Japan*), because he would never have any other opportunity to go into such a building, and he finds it quite nostalgic.

Tasai's next story is about a strange incident where a ballet teacher had her thumb cut off by a man. The man knew she would be alone at the ballet studio in the morning. He entered, strangled her till she passed out, and then cut off her thumb with a chisel. He must have had some kind of reason to do this, but no-one knows why. He apparently admitted he had wanted to cut off the little finger, but the ring finger got in the way, so he cut the thumb instead. Tasai doesn't understand why anyone would do this. No-one in the man's neighborhood knows anything about him, which makes him all the more odd. Kaoru comments that even though Japan is known for being a safe country, this kind of thing still happens. Joe asks Tasai if he has seen an increase in this kind of random crime in recent years as a reporter. Tasai says he definitely has. Crimes like murders etc used to be more clear cut in thier motives, such as wanting insurance money etc, but these days there seems to be a lot more thoughtless, maningless crime going on. Joe adds that a lot of these crimes have no apparent motive or end goal. Cases are also on the rise where crimes are commited against unrelated people. Tasai says this must have something to do with the environment people grow up in these days, but what exactly it is, he can't tell. This is unlike Hiranabe, who definitely had a motive for bringing that girl to the studio last week. *wink wink*.

To finish, Kaoru plugs the new jingle campaign, and says he might play some more entries on next week's show. Lastly, he wonders how Dobashi is doing in Rio and makes the realisation that if Dobashi never returns, Hiranabe will have to appear more often instead.

Songs - Dir en grey/Red Soil, Bauhaus/Hollow Hills, Dir en grey/Utafumi.

[heyitsyn]

Papa Bye-Bye!

Dad!Yahaba Shigeru

a/n: i know its a later update but i still made it, didn’t i? 

Yahaba Shigeru:

"ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ꜰᴇᴀʀ ᴜɴʟᴇꜱꜱ ʏᴏᴜ'ᴠᴇ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄʜɪʟᴅ ɢʀᴏᴡ ᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴅᴀʏ"

papa shiggie can’t believe his baby boys are already starting school

word count: 1.2K

(twins)

son: yahaba ryujin

son: yahaba raijin

shigeru was pacing back and forth in your living room while you were helping the twin boys get ready for their first day of school. even after the long talk full of reassurance from you, he still can’t help but feel worried not only for the safety of his boys but for the fact that they were doing his biggest fear: growing up.

it is no secret to everyone you knew and who knew you that your husband was absolutely smitten by his twins and it seems he breathed and lived everyday just to see them. despite you knowing he loved you, you can’t help but think that he loved his children more and to be honest, you can’t exactly blame him.

yahaba raijin and yahaba ryujin are the light of your lives.

not even a year into your marriage, you were already expecting and the surprise of having not only one, but two, doubled the shock. after many years of being together-having started the relationship at your second year-you knew shigeru’s desire of having children, more specifically, a son. so you can imagine his happiness inside the ob’s clinic after learning of the gender of his twins and let’s just say, you weren’t shocked when your husband fainted.

his still-round brown eyes settled on the picture frame on your corner table and if he wasn’t already crying, he was about to start now. the picture was of the 4 of you in the hospital room when the boys were born and the exhaustion was evident in both of your eyes. but it was such a happy and special day. a day that made him a father.

and he cannot believe 6 years has passed.

‘shiggie, can you help me look for ryu’s socks?’

you called from the bedroom upstairs and when he didn’t reply, you told the boys to stay still and peaked your head out of the door.

‘shigeru! darling!’

finally, shigeru jolted out of his reminiscing and he ran up the stairs and into the first bedroom on the right.

‘what-what’s wrong?’

he worriedly asked, thinking something happened, but you giggled.

‘oh, darling. you’re stressing yourself out. come, we can dress the boys together’

‘papa! papa! lookie!’

raijin’s loud voice, which he inherited from his father, pointed to his doggie-print socks and wiggled his toes to emphasize his excitement. shigeru got even more sad as those were the same socks that were gifted to him for his birthday by his godfather. speaking of which, their birthday is coming up in a few months.

‘they’re really nice, aren’t they, rai? should we take a picture and send it to uncle kenta?’

the little boy nodded excitedly at his father’s offer and proceeded to pose while his other half was being comforted by you.

‘mama, don’t wanna go. wanna stay here with rai and mama and papa’

judging by the shake of his voice, a sob was threatening to come out and you frantically cupped his chubby cheeks.

‘ryu, it’s okay. mama is right down the hall and if you miss papa, we can call him! he doesn’t have work today’

but that didn’t make him feel better and instead made him cry out.

‘noo!!!’

he sobbed and you met the eyes of your husband, who was now finished taking his pictures, and you passed off the crying boy. shigeru gently cradled his son and ran his hands through his silvery-brown hair to help calm him.

‘oi, ryu, why are you crying, hm? is it because you’re going to school? yeah, i understand it but school is really cool, you know? you can make new friends there and you’d still have rai with you’

‘eung! i’ll be with ryu! always! pinky promise! rai loves ryu!’

your youngest son, raijin, was the more outspoken one while his older-by-8-minutes-brother, ryujin, was the more timid and emotional one. this is why he is always the first to cry and easily bawls his eyes out but to counter him was his brother with his bright and outspoken personality. thankfully, ryu listens to rai and he instantly fades into hiccups by the simplest reassurance and a hug.

so ryu stopped his tears, left with only teary e/c eyes, and he looks over to rai, who was hugging you, before nodding.

‘ryu love rai, too’

he mumbled out and shigeru had to close his eyes before taking a deep breath so as to not scare his sons by his squeals.

you saw your husband contain himself so you hurriedly ushered everyone out to be able to get to school on time. of course, ryu moved sluggishly, as if he was trying to stay in the house longer, while rai was running around to grab his shoes and backpack and grabbing both of their lunch boxes from the island.

‘here ya go, ryu! want me to tie bunnies on your shoes?’

the older brother nodded shyly so rai hurriedly sat on the floor and started tying the shoelaces of the bright blue shoes.

you and your husband were standing off to the side by the door with a fond smile and warm hearts. your eyes looked up to his and you sadly chuckled before rubbing his arm.

‘they’re growing up aren’t they?’

he whispers and you stopped then nodded.

‘yes, they are, darling’

your words confirmed it and he sniffled to try to keep the tears at bay. he reached down to grab your hand and squeezed it for comfort.

‘i’m so scared. maybe it’s the thought of them eventually not needing me anymore or something but i’m terrified’

he admitted and you understood his fears because duh, they were your sons too.

‘you know, you used to make fun of kyo for crying when he sent off naomi and naoki to school but look at you now’

you tried to make him laugh and it kinda worked since he did giggle. then it settled for a sad smile.

‘he told me it was a unique type of feeling. a new type of fear. not the childish ones like spiders, or the dark, or sharks. no, it isn’t a fear that anybody can have unless they have their own children. no amount of spiders or sharks can equal this because you don’t know fear unless you’ve watched your child grow each day. every passing day was taken for granted until reality decides to throw it at your face’

oh, dear. 

it’s been quite a while since you’ve heard him talk so earnestly and you remembered him talking like that during his last volleyball practice and him passing his title for captain to little kunimi akira. 

it all revolved around the same topic: growing up.

so as shigeru drove you all to the kindergarten, he kept taking glances to the rearview mirror to simply watch rai giggling and ryu not being able to help but also laugh due to the infectious noise. it is a sound that shigeru loved.

you were beckoning the boys to follow you inside of the gates after saying your goodbyes to your husband and their father but ryu stopped. rai was already ahead but he also sensed that his twin wasn’t beside him so he stopped as well and backtracked back to him. the adorable shy child turned around and with teary eyes, he waved. shigeru’s own tears gathered but finally fell when rai held on to his brother’s other hand and waved to him too. however, he had a large grin showing off the lost front tooth.

‘papa, bye-bye!’

rai shouted and ryu nodded too.

‘pa, bye’

he tearfully added but shigeru could hear it, having developed a sensor for the voice of his soft-spoken son.

no, this isn’t a sad goodbye.

rather, it’s a joyous one.

because as much as shigeru hated watching his boys grow up, he was happy and excited to be able to see the great people his boys would become.

[thepancakeboi]

124. “You seem like a friendly face, mind if I sit with you?”

When I had walked into one of the many cafes in Shibuya for lunch, I had not expected the visit to be anything noteworthy. I was going to get something quick to eat and leave just as quickly. That is until I looked around the place. It’s never been a very crowded cafe, even at its busiest. It’s one of the hidden little gems Ann had shown me a few months ago that I’ve started frequenting somewhat regularly. But, at one of the tables closest to me, I see Ann herself sitting with someone. The other person, probably a friend of Ann’s, is unfamiliar to me. I decide to approach them, greeting them as I say, “Hello, Ann.”

Ann’s face lights up as she replies, “Oh, hey Goro!”

It’s days like these when I’m glad I have her as a friend. She was the first of Ren’s friends to accept me for who I am. Once she found out that I did, in fact, have a sweet tooth despite saying otherwise, she constantly dragged me with her to have whatever dessert she fancied that day. I’ve grown to genuinely enjoy her company. Even if I already know the answer, I ask, “What are you doing here?”

“We’re gonna get some cake! Can you believe she hasn’t had the cake here? If I had known you weren’t busy, I would’ve asked you to come too!”

“That’s all right.” I turn my head to look at the person Ann’s with. She has short black hair that fluffs out a bit. The rest of her face is obscured, her head turned as if to avoid making eye contact with me. Compared to Ann’s vibrant outfit, this girl’s is much more subdued. Even so, her long-sleeved gray top that exposes her shoulders and the black skirt seem to suit her, for some reason. I wonder why I haven’t met this girl until now. I look back to Ann as I remark, “I don’t think you’ve introduced me to your friend. What’s her name?”

“Ah! The name. Um...it’s Akira! Akira Kurusu.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet, Kurusu-san. You seem like a friendly face, mind if I sit with you?” The girl only shakes her head in response, not even looking up at me. Her reticent attitude gives me pause. I didn’t mean to offend her. “My apologies. Did I say something wrong?”

“No no! Sit down,” Ann says reassuringly. I sit down in a chair between the two girls as Ann stammers, trying to explain Akira’s behavior. “Uh, it’s just...that...she...she’s a huge fan of yours! Yeah. And we didn’t think we’d be seeing you.” She laughs awkwardly as she finishes, twirling a lock of hair in her fingers.

“Oh? I’m honored,” I reply, pulling out my typical TV-perfect smile that’s as fake as the personality it belongs to. Even if Ann knows that I’m very much unlike my detective prince facade, Akira likely doesn’t know that. I figure it’s best to keep up that pretense around her. “Most people seemed to forget my name after the Phantom Thieves incident ended. So, how do you two know each other?”

“I, uh, met her at one of my photoshoots! She’s wanted to be a model for a loooong time.”

“A model? I’m certain you’ll do well in the industry. You have the looks befitting a model.” Akira still doesn’t look at me, her gaze glued to her hands in her lap. Her nails are painted black, and I think I can see her blushing? Or perhaps it’s makeup. Either is possible, all things considered. She is rather flat-chested for a model, but there is nothing wrong with th-okay, why am I even noticing this? I really hope she didn’t catch me looking. After a few seconds of silence, I turn to Ann, who didn’t seem to notice my earlier gaze. My voice is hushed as I gently ask, “Are you sure she’s okay?”

“Yeah, she’s fine. She’s really shy at first.” Ann doesn’t seem too surprised at her friend’s behavior. Maybe it’s normal for Akira. Ann seems to remember something as she quickly adds, “But she does talk about you a lot!”

“Is that so?”

“Mhmm! I don’t think she’d be able to stop talking about you. She goes on and on about how great you are.”

The laugh I give, while mostly fake, is a somewhat genuine one. “Surely, you exaggerate.”

“Nope. We went to get crepes, and once she found out you were my friend, she talked about you the whole time.”

“I see. Well, a friend of Ann’s is a friend of mine,” I say, looking over at Akira. She’s still staring at her hands as she fiddles nervously with the chain attached to her skirt. Hold on, why am I still noticing these little details? That thought gets shoved aside. Right now, I need to find out what exactly is making Akira act so quiet around me. Is she perhaps intimidated due to my former popularity? If that’s what the problem is, I need to try and get her to open up to me somehow, get her to see that I’m not as unapproachable as she thinks. Well, not unapproachable due to being the detective prince, that is. I doubt someone like her would be comfortable around my true self. “It’s all right. You don’t have to be shy around me. You and Ann are probably much more popular than me.”

“Oh, don’t say that! You’re the second detective prince. Even she knew about you after being in Tokyo for only a couple of months.”

“You’re not from here?” Akira shakes her head, starting to play with the chain hanging off her black choker. I can’t see much of her face, but I think I see a smile starting to form. At least she seems to be more at ease, even if she hasn’t said a word thus far. “Are you enjoying Tokyo so far?” A nod this time. “How long have you lived here? Or are you just visiting?”

“She’s been here for about two years now,” Ann says for Akira. “Likes it so much better than home.”

“In that case, perhaps I know the area where you’re living? I’ve been to a lot of places in Tokyo.” As I finish my comment, Akira’s chest starts to heave. Is she...laughing? What a strange girl. It’s clear she’s trying to hold her laughter in as if she doesn’t want anyone to hear it. I don’t understand. What’s so funny about what I just said? “Kurusu-san? Are you all right?”

Akira finally looks up at me with brilliant gray eyes accentuated by a lot of makeup: eyeliner, pink eyeshadow, and even a little black heart under her left eye. Her gaze is sharp, and it feels like she’s staring right into my soul. It almost reminds me of- Wait a minute. I get a closer look at the person sitting next to me. I recognize those eyes. My own eyes narrow instantly as I drop the detective prince act entirely.

“You.”

“Akira” gives me a lopsided smile, their identity finally revealed to me. I know exactly who this person is. “Hi, Akeppi~” the “girl” who is none other than my boyfriend, Ren Amamiya, says before quickly kissing me. His lips, I notice, are covered with lipstick, and the blush I had noticed earlier was indeed a lot of makeup. Now that I know exactly who this is, I understand why I was so drawn to the mysterious person next to me. I allow myself to notice that he’s wearing black thigh highs over fishnet tights. Well, I suppose this being Ren explains the flat-chestedness observation from earlier. “Are you enjoying yourself, staring at me?”

My eyes dart up upon hearing his question, seeing the devious look in his eyes. Damn it, did he notice earlier then...? I groan, “Shut up. Just...explain. Now.”

“We didn’t mean to trick you!” Ann says, trying not to giggle now that the charade is done. “I just wanted to see if Ren could pass off as a girl, and he let me dress him up.”

“It must’ve worked if even Akeppi didn’t notice,” Ren says as he scoots his chair closer so that he can hug me. So much for that reserved personality from before. “You should’ve seen the look on your face when you realized it was me.”

“You are a menace,” I snap, trying to pry his arms off of me with no success.

“Yup! But I’m your menace.”

“Damn you both.”

Ann and Ren both laugh at that. I wouldn’t be surprised if they had been trying to hold it in during the entire conversation. How they made it so long without laughing, I have no idea. Despite how annoyed I am that I fell for their spur-of-the-moment prank, I can’t help but join in, chuckling under my breath. Their laughter is infectious. Well, at least they’re enjoying themselves.

“This was fun, Ann,” Ren comments after he’s had his fill of laughing at my expense. “We should do this again.”

“For sure!” she replies. “We could try another style and see how it looks.”

“Wait, I have an idea. You should do Akeppi next time,” Ren suggests, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“Oh, that would be amazing!” Ann immediately looks at me, her excitement at the prospect all too obvious. “Can I? Please?”

“Not a chance,” I snap, refusing to entertain this latest scheme of theirs. “Ren may have agreed to it, but I’m not Ren.”

“Come on, please?” Ann looks at me, doe-eyed, pleading with me to allow her request. “At least let me do your hair and paint your nails.”

“Fine,” I groan. I can put up with that much, I suppose. They both grin simultaneously, sharing a quick glance. Something tells me I should be concerned about what they’re plotting, but I can deal with that later. “So, are you both actually planning on having cake, or was that as much a lie as Ren being a girl named Akira Kurusu?”

“Oh, yeah! That was true. Do you want some too, Goro?”

“I don’t think I’ll have much of a choice, considering someone probably won’t let go of me.” I pointedly look at Ren as I say this, who is still hugging me, might I add.

“No~” he hums as he tightens his hold, confirming that much for me.

“Well, in that case, I suppose I’ll have some cake. If it’s as delicious as it was last time, then I look forward to it.”

We talk for a while longer while eating cake, Ann having more than enough pieces for the both of us. How she can eat so many sweets with no problem, I have no idea. Eventually, we part ways with Ann, Ren holding onto me the entire way home like a cute, clingy girlfriend head-over-heels in love with me. That is a mental image I never thought I would apply to my own life. I can’t help but affectionately ruffle Ren’s hair, the action earning me a jubilant grin. I truly am blessed to have both Ren and Ann in my life.

Prompt source

[dragonrajafanfiction]

Tokyo Love Story (Part 6) The Fight

This scene does not appear in the books or the game. This is a scene that relates to the MC and her journey in my “Main Story Quests Rewritten” series but takes themes and information from what happened to Kogure and Akira Sakurai. One thing that is not communicated well in the game, is that Kogure and Akira were put in positions to die. The things that happened to them didn’t “Just Happen”. It was arranged.

I can’t ask you to enjoy what I’ve written, but I hope you read it and feel emotions.

In the park where you had taken shelter from Hydra, you were now trapped by them. You and Chance were unable to escape and Chisei Gen now stood over Chance while you hid behind a Buddha statue, still out of sight. You’re not sure what to do. While you were strong and fast and clever. Chisei Gen was stronger and faster than you. There wasn’t much cover, it wouldn’t be a lot of time before he found you. All you had was your deadpool claw dagger, but the sword Onimaru could even cut through that.

Chisei Gen loomed over the trembling whimpering Chance. “I’m only going to ask you once. Where is Ruri Kazama?”

“I don’t know! I don’t know!” He held out his hands, pleading and in a flash of light, one of his fingers disappeared. 

Chance’s agonized screams drove you to press your fingers into the ground. You didn’t care if you toppled a few buildings. You would use your Soul Skill if you had to make this stop! You just needed Chance to hang on for a few seconds. Just a few seconds!

“I’m telling the truth!” Chance clutched his wrist and fell to his side. Wide-eyed with terror, sweating with pain, he gasped. “After Ryoma Sakurai died, information stopped coming from up top. I didn’t even know Kazama was going to show up in town until he was there! I swear!”

You close your eyes tighter, the tendrils of spiritual energy pierce the ground, racing to gather and spread. Then your head is pulled up on your neck!  You're pulled up by your hair. You have to stand on tip toe to relieve the pressure on your scalp. A smooth slimy voice chuckles. “Oh ho ho… Hey boss! I found a little rabbit!”

Your eyes go wide. If he saw your face… Thinking quickly, you pull the golden comb out of your hair to release your bangs. They descend like a waterfall over your eyes.

“No! Let her go! Please!” Through your dark locks, Chance furiously tries to reach for the dagger in his leg.

“If you pull that out, you’ll bleed to death.” The mocking voice from behind you reminded you so much of the pantysniffer. “Oo… she’s young too… Boss, when you’re done with this guy can I have her?”

Chance’s face twists with anger but you meet his eyes and give a little shake of your head.

“I don’t care, Yasha.” Chisei turned back to Chance. “You’re Inuyama Ichirou, a Rank A hybrid, Code: Orange. You’ll lose control at any time, but you’ve evaded our tracking and have gone unmonitored…”

“I haven’t killed anyone!” Chance gasps from the ground. “I just worked as a prostitute and cater to clientele who like it rough. It’s what I do. It’s how I satisfy it. It’s all consensual.” True to his nature, Chance let out a laugh even though he could see his reflection in that blade that had killed so many of his fellow hybrids.

Yasha turns to you and you stay still to try maintain your focus on your soul skill, but your temper and fury rises. Your eyes glittered like hard black stones behind your hair. Yasha whispers in your ear. “You like it rough too huh?”

You didn’t just need to stay still for your sake, you needed to stay still for Chance’s. If Chance tried to fight Chisei, it would be over before you could do anything. You look at Chance again and shake your head.

“Huh!” Yasha’s eyes widened slightly. “A brave one.”

“Despite that…” Chisei continues slowly, sending an annoyed glance at Yasha. “I can’t just let you go. You need to be monitored.”

“Please… don’t kill me. Don’t send me to prison. I’ll live quietly, like I always have. I’ve always lived quietly. And… “ A tear slipped down his cheek. “I love her. I love her. Please.” He fell at Chisei’s feet, bowing until his forehead touched the ground. “Let us go to Hokkaido.” He turned to you. “Let’s go to Hokkaido. There’s a lot of snow there. We’ll go and we’ll get married in the snow.”

“Okay.” You say, softly, staying still. Your voice is gentle and sweet, in contrast to the brutal scene. “I’ll marry you in Hokkaido.”

Despite his fear and the pain crashing through him, Chance smiled through his tears. “Good. That’s good. Then in that case, I will renounce all ties to the Devil Clan!”

Chisei doesn’t say anything but the tip of his sword lowers. “Sakura. Go tell the others to finish searching the car. Yasha, let the girl go and go with her.”

Yasha let out a sad little whimper and released your hair. You sink down to the ground and the rest of your hair forms a curtain around your face. The flowers tilt askew, still hanging on by just their pins. Yasha stuffs his hands in his pockets and slouches sullenly as he ambles down the path out of sight.

“I will need your information so I can track you.” Chisei kneels next to Chance and Chance stares in wonder as Chisei pulls a handkerchief from his trenchcoat to wrap his hand where he’s now missing a finger.

Tears were already flowing down Chance’s face and now they became a torrent. “I want my nieces and nephews back! They took the children! I can’t go without them too!”

Chisei calmly ties the wound with a stiff knot.. “From where?”

“From the Residential District in Tokyo. The one that burned. My brothers fought so the kids wouldn’t be taken. They’re all orphans now… so they were taken to the prisons.”

Chisei let out a breath and then he nodded. “Alright. Give me a list of their names. Once you get to Hokkaido, I’ll have them released to you. But you have to stay monitored. That’s all I ask.” Chisei stands up and starts wiping his sword with a cloth.

Chance is shaking but he’s slowly returning to his confidence. He turned to you and smiled. Your chest swells with pride. Not only could Chance save you, but also what remained of his family.

Chance reached into his jacket and pulled out a vial of purple liquid. When you see it and when Chisei sees it, you both gasp. You remembered this vial from the man with the stripe suit who had used it to turn into a monster to fight Caesar. You never thought that Chance would be holding a vial of such deadly poison. No wonder he cried so much in your arms when you told him to live! He was holding a suicide pill right in his hand!

“I was planning on using this if we got in a pinch… but not any more.” Chance said gently.

“Who gave you that!” Chisei hissed. He had gone pale faced, his expression taut. His hand tightens on his blade.

“I don’t know. It was next to my head when I woke up one morning. Whoever left it, left a note saying I was at the end of my life and I should use my time to dance brightly.” His eyes narrowed in hatred as he held it up. “...like a moth in the flames…” He threw it hard into the pea gravel. The vial shattered and the purple liquid seeped into the ground.

Chisei lunged forward, brandishing his sword. You leap to your feet and rush to meet him.

From the shadow of the trees in the park, a muzzle of a gun flashes and the bullet that should have struck Chance in the heart, shatters across the sword Onimaru! The shrapnel sparkled in the air like gold dust and scattered onto the ground.

You skid to a halt and a bullet whizzes just by your head! 

Chisei snarled, crouching over a stunned Chance, his body blocking him from the hidden shooter. His eyes are dark with rage. “I knew it!”

You thought Chisei was attacking Chance, but Chisei was protecting him!

You both spot the hidden assassin at the same time. He’s lying low in the bushes in dark camouflage and had to have been watching the entire scene.

The assassin pops the cork off his own vial of the elixir and upends it into his mouth. Immediately, black vines crawl up his arms and neck, followed by shining white scales. His fingers extended beyond the limits of known life and his face shrunk into something monstrous!  He leaps directly at Chisei, clearing the distance in a single bound, screaming like a wild thing. Chisei moves aside just enough to allow the claw to scratch his cheek. He only lifts the tip of the sword slightly. The momentum of the newborn dead pool carries it into the tip, slides him all the way down the blade, to the hilt. Chisei doesn’t waste time or words. He raises his foot and kicks the would-be assassin to the ground, stands over him and stabs him once through the neck. With a single twist, you hear the vertebrae snap.

Chisei looks at Chance coldly, waving his sword once and splashing the black blood into the grass. “The Devil Clan is exploiting the desperation of its members when it's giving them that poison. This is the third time this has happened. First was with Akira Sakurai, the lab experiment who helped create this vile liquid. Second was Ryoma Sakurai who drank it to end her life at the Paradisio. The person giving it to them intends for them to die. Each time, they talk about moths… and flames… when I find out who is behind that toxin, I will kill him myself.”

Chance’s hands balled into fists. “But it’s you Hydra who are driving us to desperation. You’re not excused!”

“Chance… let’s go…” You move next to him to try to help him up. You want Chisei to let you go while you have the chance and while he still doesn’t recognize you.

“You should go quickly. That assassin was a Devil Clan member hidden among our ranks. Get tickets to Hokkaido. I’ll provide a safe place for you until this is all over. I’m afraid you won’t be able to trust anyone else.”

“MC…” Chance looks at you, whispering earnestly. “Do I get a star-heart?” He chuckles low in his throat.

You laugh that he’s still thinking of that silly game. “Of course you get a star heart. You can have all the star-hearts.”

He stands up and then suddenly pulls you to him. He holds you close, pressing his body against yours. His breathing accelerates like he’s just run a marathon. He kisses you but it’s not like the kiss from before. This is more like Z’s forceful, penetrating kiss but ten times more aggressive. His fingertips press into your back hard, so hard they might leave bruises. And then his fingers send sharp pangs into your back, like the nails have turned to needles. You want to scream. Your eyes widen and you try to pull away but his grip is so tight now, you feel as though your bones might break. When you look into his eyes, they’re blood shot and then they blaze golden!

Even though Chance didn’t take the molotov cocktail, the dragon blood in his body has been raging all his life, like the fuse on a bomb. He knew the eventuality and had maintained his human nature for a long time. But now, the excitement of freedom, of love, the smell of blood and the adrenaline of violence had pushed him over the edge. He wasn't losing control because of poison, he was losing control by his own nature!

Chisei’s attack was swift, and Chance turned to defend himself. Bone claws had started to grow from his hands just like they did with the assassin, but it was your bronze dagger that flashed up in an arc and sent Chisei staggering back. He stared at you, wide eyed, finally getting a good look at your face through your hair and makeup. “MC?!”

A look of horror passes over his face. He had wanted to get to know you over sake, but instead, you’d seen him torture and nearly kill the man you loved.

You don’t care about Chisei, you rush to Chance who’s clutching his head and staggering, moaning loudly in pain.

“Chance!” You grab his shoulders and look into his face, pleading. “Chance, you have to live, do you hear me? You have to fight it! Fight!”

His eyes flicker from green to gold and he stares at you in fear. “I’m trying…” 

He falls to one knee and you follow him down, your hands sliding down his arms. You try to keep eye contact as he swayed like someone drunk..

“Chance, you have to live. You have to live. Please… please remember.” You glance back at Chisei. His sword is low and his eyes are dull and empty as he looks at you. 

He doesn’t look like he’s going to attack. You turn back to Chance. “You can’t lose it now. You can’t!”

“I don’t want to…” He sobs. “I’m...so… close.” The dark veins on his hands slowly start to retract and the scales stop their progression. His will to live and to love you is so strong that the dragonization process has halted. He meets your gaze with sparkling green eyes. “I love you.”

You cradle his face in your hands and smile at him, lovingly. “You’re doing it!” You turn back to Chisei, face radiant. “He’s doing it!”

Chisei doesn’t share your enthusiasm. A heavy sadness has fallen over the man and he doesn’t move.

You look at Chance again, willing the scales to fall, willing the veins to retract. You shake his shoulders to rouse him. “I told you. You can live.”

“We’ll get married in Hokkaido.” He says, his eyes lidding half closed. He sounds sleepy, overcome with incredible weariness. “In the snow.”

“Yes.” You nod.

“We’ll raise my nephews and nieces.”

“Yes!” You laughed, tears of joy ran from your eyes.

“I’m… so happy…” He rests his head against your chest and you lightly stroke his hair. You press your lips against his head and close your eyes. For a moment, you hug him like a mother would soothe a child after a terrible nightmare. “Just focus… focus on getting better.”

“...Bye…” His voice is scarcely above a whisper.

Your eyes snap open. He pushes you to the ground and the claws rip across your dress. The delicate lace floats into the steady breeze. You’re on your back, looking up as the darkness of the sky surrounds the bright golden eyes of the person who was once Chance - Inuyama Ichirou. There was no human there, only a vicious animal. His hand closed on your throat.

You should have fought, but your training didn’t kick in. Your mind is completely blank. His face is withering away inches from yours. His skin is turning a sickly grey-green. But you don’t want to use your dagger. Or your soul skill. You want him to stop. To fight it.

In that moment, a strong arm wraps around Chance’s throat like a python and pulls him back. In the next instant, the bright blue sword pierces from his back through his chest, sending blood raining down on your hair, your face, your dress.

Chance flails wildly, gasping. “Wait… wait!” 

“Wait!” You cry. His eyes are green again. Chance was still fighting!

Chisei lets him fall however. He turns him over on his back with his foot. Chance can no longer speak, gurgling blood rising up out of his mouth.

“Stop!” You leap and take hold of Chisei’s sword arm in an attempt to disarm him but his elbow slams into your chest so hard your feet come out of your slippers, you sail through the air and land so hard on the ground you’re stunned breathless.

When you sit up, Chance is struggling, gagging against the sword in his neck. Chisei retracts it and he lays still.

You can’t even scream. You run even though it's too late. Your spirit feels out of your body and the ringing in your ears makes the world go completely silent. You don’t remember falling next to Chance, but in the next instant you’re cradling his head, rocking back and forth like the abandoned Izanami. You can feel the warmth of the blood soaking into your fine hanfu.

The scales leave Chance’s pale face and the skin left there is perfect, like a child’s skin. He looks beautiful. But he’s dead. He would never open his eyes again, speak to you again, or kiss you. You’re not getting married in Hokkaido and his relatives would languish in prison. You thought you had it. You thought you could defy the world. But the world is too cold and cruel to you to grant you such happiness.

You remove your tattered silk shawl from your shoulders and press it into the wounds. There’s so much blood that the thin fabric seems to dissolve into it. You turned to Chisei who was still pale, his jaw was clenched as he looked at you with a dull, heavy depression. 

The sky above you had grown darker and darker and now it finally opened up, releasing a flooding torrent from above that soaks you in cold rain. You gather yourself up to your feet.

“You murderer…” You point at him with one pale hand, your dark hair plastered on your face. “Killer!”

Lightning flashes and thunder snaps through the air as though the judgement was sustained by God.

Chisei shook his head slowly. “He was gone…” His voice is soft, but despite his attempt to be firm with you, the words were trembling.

“No!”

Chisei freezes. You’ve flung the shawl at him. The blood flies in an arc and you paint Chisei with it, like Jackson Pollock flinging paint on a canvas. It splashes up and down his white shirt and dark pants. “His blood…” You breathe the words in and out in fury. “His blood is red!”

Chisei looks down and palms the stain on his shirt. It was crimson without a trace of black.

“Chance was still fighting! He didn't give up! He didn’t die because it was hopeless. He died because you gave up on him!” You fling the shawl at him again.

Chisei flinches away from the rain of blood. His expression relaxes and the cold emotionless look returns to his eyes. He turns his back to you. “MC. You’re still wanted by the Executive Board. But… if you run… I’ll give you a head start.”

You gasp in disbelief at such bold insensitivity. The remorselessness struck you colder than the rain. However, the shock reminds you that there’s no point in fighting once the person you love is gone. Instead, you remove the gold chains from Chance's neck and give him one last lingering look. He looks like he’s sleeping peacefully there in the rain. You hold the chains tight to yourself and dash away towards the gate. You clear it in a single bound and disappear into the night.