#i have been so many different people since 2019.

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads

The Princess and the Fangirl

YA contemporary prince & the pauper set at a convention

follows a fan who wants to save her fave character from being killed off, and the actress playing her who’s desperate to be free of the intense franchise

when they’re mistaken for each other they instantly hate each other - but after a script is leaked, they swap places to try solve each of their problems - and start to see the fandom from the each other’s perspective

light (since they know each other for like 2 days) f/f & m/f

this is so deeply mid-2010s fandom tumblr. lmao.

[stillunpainted]

I haven't seen it in a while but I feel like Dororo (2019) is one of the very few cases where a darker reboot actually works because it doesn't feel like it was made to make the series "better" by making it more serious but instead to look at the concept from a different angle and really run with what it would be like to have to regain body parts and senses that you haven't had your entire life. I haven't read the source material so I'm not making a claim that either the original manga and anime are better or worse, and more that the most recent adaptation is a really interesting take on the concept and I feel like with a lot of reboots, especially rn, that doesn't happen too often.

[kittykatinabag]

Is it the lack of ssris talking or is this place so dampening that I can't even get myself to do day trips to other cities in Ireland?

[f1byjessie]

A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS ━━ LN4.

sometimes the right words are hard to come across, and sometimes everything you need to say can be captured in an image.

( lando norris x photographer!reader )

━━ part nine.

INSTAGRAM.

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, and 714,148 others

tagged: yourusername

mclaren As we get closer and closer to the start of the 2024 season, we thought we’d take the time to introduce new fans to the team that works behind the scenes! Starting us off, we have Y/N L/N, our personal paddock photographer! Y/N has been here with us at McLaren since 2019, and is the genius mind behind many of the photos we’ve posted throughout the years. She’s an important part of our community and helps tremendously in not only capturing our drivers in action, but also in getting the other behind the scenes members of our team the recognition they deserve. We’re glad to have her back here with us in Bahrain, and we can’t wait to see what beautiful concoctions she comes up with this year! 🧡

view all 9,147 comments

user if there is 100 y/n fans, i am one of them. if there is one y/n fan, it is me. if there are no y/n fans, i have died.

user love love LOVE that mclaren takes the time to recognize the hard work of everyone who supports the drivers

↳ user i feel like f1 promotes the racers, team principals, and pit crew so much and forgets about everyone else that makes sure these teams are able to function so seamlessly

user CAN WE GET A MEET THE ADMIN POST TOO??? 👀👀👀

user i bumped into y/n back in silverstone 2021, like literally bumped into her, and she was so sweet!!

user she’s my photography inspo 🤩

user her dedication to the mclaren team is so apparent when you think about the fact that she DOESN’T get the same recognition as the drivers, but she has chosen to work for them for what will be 6 years as of this season. she could have easily move to a different formula 1 team or even another sport entirely, but she still comes back and that’s a dedicated artist

↳ user the fact that she did a little stint over at manchester city fc and STILL chose to come back to mclaren even tho i imagine f1 has a much harsher and stricter schedule with the intercontinental travel than football does

user this is who we have to thank for all those beautiful shots of lando??? cuz if so, bless her omg 🙏🙏🙏

user in this household we appreciate the crew that works tirelessly to keep us entertained

user so tired of seeing ppl disregard her skill as a photographer just bc of who she’s dating

↳ user OMG SAME

yourusername glad to be here, can’t wait to travel the world with these amazing people 🧡

INSTAGRAM.

liked by oscarpiastri, mclaren, and 214,051 others

tagged: mclaren

yourusername locked in and ready 😎

view all 1,514 comments

oscarpiastri so glad you’ve gotten over your temporary obsession with blue 😁

↳ yourusername so glad you haven’t lost your ability to get on my last nerve 😁

↳ oscarpiastri so glad you’re still insufferable even on your best days 😁

↳ yourusername now that’s a comeback i can be proud of 🥹

user MISSED THESE LADS OH MY DAYS

user ONE DAY UNTIL TESTING GUYS

user oscar looking fine asf these days 😩 that winter break treated him well

mclaren The boys are back in town!

↳ yourusername dare i say my milkshake brought them to the yard?

↳ mclaren It certainly called us 😍

↳ yourusername you flatter me mclaren admin 😌

↳ mclaren Only the best for our best 😘

user that’s some pretty intense eye contact from lando in the last image…

↳ user he ain’t even looking at the camera

↳ user nah bruv is def looking at y/n 👀👀

↳ user I NEED THEM TO GET OVER WHATEVER HAPPENED AND GO BACK TO BEING FRIENDS CUZ I MISS THE BANTER IN THE COMMENTS

↳ user i think we should probably respect their privacy and understand that something happened (presumably in the off season) that we weren’t privy to. so long as they can both maintain professionalism around one another, they don’t have to do or “get over” anything. does it suck to see two very close friends no longer get along in the way they used to? absolutely. but we don’t know what happened or if anything even did happen. in the event that something did, we don’t know who’s involved or who, if anyone, is at fault. they’re both justified in choosing to end a friendship due to a falling out, or even if they just grew distant. but even as i say all of this, it’s still speculation.

↳ user we don’t actually know if they aren’t friends any longer or if they’ve just moved their friendship off of online platforms. it should be noted that y/n is very publicly dating someone, and idk about you, but i know firsthand how delusional fans can be. her bf’s fans could easily attack her over banter with another man, and lando’s fans could just as easily start reading into that same banter which runs the very real possibility of putting all three of them in an awkward situation where y/n is being shipped with a man that ISN’T her bf.

↳ user what about the banter she has with the mclaren admin? 🤔

↳ user context is super important here. the flirting between y/n and the mclaren admin is very obviously fake. it has been from the beginning, and when ppl “ship” the two of them together it’s for the bit and to play along with their fake bromance. lando and y/n have both been legitimately shipped together since they both started working with mclaren, which changes the undertone of the shipping comments bc ppl often genuinely misconstrue their banter as REAL flirting.

user why do comment sections related to y/n always turn into debate sessions

↳ user REAL like ain’t no way i’m reading all that

user oscar’s hair sticking up in every picture is my roman empire

user I’VE BEEN MISSING THE ORANGE I’M SO GLAD IT’S BACK 🧡🧡🧡

user wait i didn’t even realize until now that this is the first post in like a month that’s actually had public comments turned on

↳ user probably bc her bf’s loser fans have finally stopped harassing her

jackgrealish must be nice having all that sun 😒

↳ yourusername it really is, bet you’re jealous

Testing goes fine, until it doesn’t.

“A drain cover?” Lando’s voice echoes across the garage. “Another fucking drain cover?”

You purse your lips.

Yesterday, he’d been upset on Oscar’s behalf when they’d cancelled the remainder of the morning session after only a couple hours to solve the problem of the track’s dislodged pieces. He’d complained and cussed out the incompetence, and then reassured Oscar that things would be better for the third day.

But the third day is here now, and he’s even more upset now being told to pit after a measly thirty minutes for the same issue.

“This is the second fucking time━” he cuts himself off with an angry huff and runs his hands roughly through the curls of his hair, letting his fingers catch on the tangles and yanking through them in his frustration. Sweat glistens on his furrowed brow. His cheeks are still flushed from the heat of the car.

It’s the most emotion you’ve seen from him since you’ve come back.

The time you’ve already spent in Bahrain has been stilted at best. Lando continues to stick with his attempts at avoiding you, but it’s harder to do so here when your hotel rooms are on the same floor and you’re limited to the confines of the garage for most of the day. Even when he isn’t in the car, there’s not a lot to do wandering around the paddock and even if there was they’ve encouraged him to stay where he can easily be reached.

You’re trying not to be smug about it, but every time you glance over your shoulder and catch him watching you━ catch him quickly looking away when your eyes meet and he realizes he’s been caught━ you feel pleased.

If there’s one thing you’ve learned about Lando, it’s that he’s always got a limit.

If you wait long enough, stand your ground and prove that you really have no intentions whatsoever of giving in and breaking the ice between the two of you, eventually he’ll cave. When he realizes he won’t get what he wants, that he’ll have to actually put in the effort to repair what he’s broken rather than having it magically fix itself, he’ll have no other choice but to do so.

“They might not cancel the session,” Oscar chimes in, attempting to placate his aggravated teammate. “Since they already had to yesterday, I doubt they’ll do it again today.”

Unfortunately, that doesn’t actually calm Lando down at all. If anything, it just reminds him again of the fact that this is the second time this same complication has happened which has him huffing angrily again and running his hands through his tangled curls even rougher.

You wince at that.

Andrea, McLaren’s team principal, steps forward. “Take a breath,” he orders, resting a heavy hand on Lando’s shoulder. “Go walk a lap around the garage or something, whatever, but I need you to calm down.”

You’re prepared for that to be the end of it, but then Andrea looks over and catches your eye. “Y/N,” he says, nodding his head towards Lando. “You go with him. Keep him out of trouble.”

Well.

You like to think you do a much better job at keeping your emotions off of your face than Lando, which isn’t hard when his features scrunch up into a pained scowl at Andrea’s words, but you can feel the pinch of your own eyebrows furrowing and the smile you send towards the team principal probably looks more like a grimace if Oscar pursed lips in your peripherals is anything to go by.

Lando storms out and you follow reluctantly after him.

He can’t really go very far, not if he wants to be within a reasonable distance when━ if━ they call him back to continue the morning testing session. So he paces back and forth and back and forth just outside the garage’s exit out into the paddock.

Your phone tells you that ten minutes pass like this. It’s the longest you’ve been alone with him in a while and his distraction lets you focus on the finer details that you’ve missed when he’s going out of his way to avoid you.

There are deep, dark, bruise-like circles that hang heavily beneath his eyes. His skin is sun-kissed and tanned from his time out catching rays during his travels, but there’s a pale pallor beneath the added color that makes him look sick. Despite his current anger and the tension coiled in his muscles just waiting to lash out and strike, his shoulders seem to droop beneath the invisible weight of whatever he’s carrying with him.

He looks small.

Lando’s always been on the shorter side, but he’s never before looked small. Not like this. Never like this.

The longer you watch, the more the back and forth pacing starts to transform into the anxious stride of a cornered animal.

You aren’t arrogant enough to assume he’s like this because of you entirely, but it does occur to you that maybe he’s having just as rough of a time as you are with the newfound distance between yourselves.

You watch him silently, for a little while longer, observing the way his stride hitches every few steps and he just barely manages to stop himself from stumbling over his own feet. He’s still running his hands through his hair. By the seventh time he practically claws his fingers through his curls you heave a sigh.

“Quit that,” you snap.

“Quit what?” He fires back with just as much bite.

You roll your eyes. “You’re gonna rip your hair out if you keep pulling on it like that.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” he stops in his tracks and turns on his heel to face you with a sneer. His words drip with sarcasm. “I forgot you must be used to Grealish now, right? And I bet he’s got at least a ten-step hair care routine. I wonder, does he use unicorn sweat and essence of rainbow to keep it that smooth and bright? There’s no other possible way!”

“You’re being an asshole, Lando.”

“My sincerest apologies,” he says. “How could I ever think Grealish would use unicorn sweat of all things? He uses pixies tears, my mistake.”

You’re not sure how a few words managed to turn into this━ you’d just wanted him to stop pulling at his hair. It looked painful and he’s always been a bit tender headed. Now, instead, you can feel the anger bubbling up inside you and it seems like Lando’s frustrations about the testing delay, and your friendship with Jack apparently, have made things worse.

Like throwing gasoline onto a flame.

You scowl, “Seriously. You’re being a fucking prick.”

He throws his arms up into the air, “Why not just run off to Grealish then? Since he seems to be your new best friend and you tell him everything.”

If your life were a movie, this is the moment in time when the stars would align and fate would force everything to position itself perfect in place. Like the pieces of a puzzle, it would all work out and you’d calmly explain to Lando what happened back in January with Garrett and Manchester City, and he’d understand immediately and apologize, and you’d hug it out and then both return to the garage just in time for them to announce the testing session would re-commence.

But your life isn’t a movie, and reality feels significantly different to the scripted perfection of fiction.

The precarious security of the perch you’ve settled yourself upon comes crashing down, and the tentative balance you’ve managed to maintain since the start of February when you were back in papaya again shatters with it. Something inside you snaps. The dam has burst and everything held back comes rushing to the front like a torrential wave.

“At least he was there for me when some prick blackmailed me into a relationship at the threat of my livelihood,” you snarl.

Lando pauses for a moment. He makes a couple different faces before settling on a mix between pissed off and confused, and his arms cross over his chest. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I didn’t want to be in a relationship with Garrett Ward, Lando!” You exclaim. “He threatened that if I didn’t pretend to be his girlfriend, he’d fake some misconduct rumor and ruin my career and I was too afraid to say no because this is all I have!”

This isn’t how you’d wanted it all to go down. You’d always imagined you’d get the satisfaction of an apology, and that Lando would get drunk on cheap wine with you like old times, and you’d explain what all happened with the confidence of being a little tipsy and you wouldn’t feel ashamed because Lando’s your best friend and he’d reassure you that you did what you had to, and then you’d listen to him shit talk Garrett for the rest of the night. In the morning, he’d have some idea of how to fix it all without ruining your career, and then you’d be able to put it all behind you and go back to how things were before the winter off-season ever started.

This is far from that, but there’s a sense of relief that comes nonetheless from getting it all off your chest to Lando━ to the person you’ve wanted to talk to from the very beginning

You feel tears burning your eyes, blurring your vision. “I can barely pay my rent as is, and I’m only actually living there for a few dumb months out of the year anyway. Do you know how much worse it would be if I got kicked from McLaren too? Nobody else in the country would hire me if he followed through with what he was threatening.”

“Well,” Lando shrugs his shoulders, looking properly chastised. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I fucking tried, you muppet!” You throw your arms up in exasperation and then wipe at your eyes in frustration when the tears start to roll down your cheeks. “I called you every day for a week and you ignored me! I sent you text after text after fucking text━” your voice breaks, “━and you didn’t even read them! Did you know I locked myself in the bathroom and cried every single day I had to work there?”

You glare at him.

“The only thing that made it better was Jack fucking Grealish coming into my office and telling me I could at least go to him if I ever needed anything,” you snap. “So fuck off with this whole holier than thou bullshit. You left me, and Jack took your place because I was drowning!”

“Y/N…”

Crying hadn’t been a part of your plan, but the tears won’t stop now that they’re going. It’s embarrassing. You’re already worried about just how many people heard you shouting, and now you’re even more worried about someone coming back to look for you both and finding you sobbing your eyes out.

“I’m sorry━”

Lando’s arms wrap around you, warm and strong and sure.

━━ tags: @maih23 @urfavnoirette @leclercsluv @f1luvur @formulaal @a-disturbing-self-reflection @starlightpierre @chezmardybum @marshmummy @405rry @sideboobrry11 @d3kstar @mcmuppet @happylittlereader @casperlikej @5starl1ght @bellezaycafe @whentheautumnleavesfall @mess-is-my-aesthetic @ssprayberrythings @landosgirlxoxo @lifelessfan @81ja @wcnorris @a-disturbing-self-reflection (CLOSED).

━━ a/n: and there we have it folks. lando is finally back in the picture! this part was a lot of fun to write, because i've been waiting for this moment since the initial fallout in the beginning. on that note, i finished getting it all whipped up this morning while watching the qualis, so if there are any mistakes that i haven't caught that's why. i was a bit distracted, so please pretend they aren't there haha!

[brofisting]

MY FRIEND, I ABSOLUTELY CAN!!!! 🥰 Starting from the beginning...

PART ONE: ORIGINAL FILMANIA PRODUCTION & FATE

It’s 2019-20, you’re Mile Phakphum Romsaithong, a very rich socialite who plays guitar. You’re bored and you’ve been thinking about getting into acting, and have been offered misc. BL casting opportunities before (1), but never really felt like any of them were For You, so you turned them down. 

Then, one day, you find out that there is a BL currently casting from the studio Filmania, where the male lead is based on you (2), at least your public persona/physically/whatever. Being a puppy of a man, you are delighted, and go read the script, and then the books, and decide you’ll go to the casting call for it.

At casting call, you re-meet Apo Nattawin Wattanagitiphat (3), who you went to college with and had a giant crush on (4). You guys hit it off IMMEDIATELY, chemistry unhinged, and get cast as Kinn and Porsche. Apo takes it, even though he has historically had a bad experience with the Thai acting industry (5). You are delighted by this incidence of FATE!!!!!!

PART TWO: IF YOU DON’T HAVE FATE ON YOUR SIDE STORE-BOUGHT IS FINE

The show gets dropped (6) Something something the authors, something something the company, whatever. I assume, if you are Mile, you are very sad! And if you’re Apo you’re also pretty sad, because it seemed like for once even with all the industry BS you had a cool dude on your side who you hit it off with, and it was gonna be a cool show. On the heels of that, if you are Mile, and have stacks of money, and see your college crush who is an unbelievable actor about to re-give up on acting and call it a wash, you are like, “wait, I have stacks of money and know everyone”.

So you, Mile, call up the head of the small talent agency you’re signed with, Be On Cloud, which is really just your buddy Pond Krisda Witthayakhajorndet in a fake mustache and a trench coat, and go, hey! So! Have you ever wanted to make television? I have a man here I CANNOT allow to be sad under any circumstances, and also, we’re really good at this and there’s an audience here.

PART THREE: BE ON CLOUD, KINNPORSCHE TAKE TWO!!!!

Pond, being just as unhinged as Mile, thinks about it for a second, and is like. Well. How different can making television be from running an event planning company, which is my real job (7). It’s just calling up a bunch of different guys who are good at their jobs and putting them in one place. And I know so many different guys! Let’s do it!

They get the rights (handwaves this I don’t know anything about it) and jump into production. They get their shit together UNREALISTICALLY quickly (6), and on top of that, since they’re starting from scratch and they’re just A Bunch Of Guys led by Pond and Mile, they decide that their priorities are #1 making art and #2 making Apo happy. With regards to #1, they rework the script (8), hire the best acting coaches money can afford, and put the cast through character-building and intimacy workshops. With regards to #2, they toss out all the industry bullshit that has sucked for him in the past -- no more crew/cast hierarchy (9), no more homophobia on-set (10), no more fake fanservice (11).

FINALE: MIRACLES IF U BELIEVE ETC.

Magically, it turns out, when you create a great working environment, you get really, really good TV!!!!! Which means that their unhinged plan succeeded beyond their wildest dreams, and now Mile & Apo are internationally famous superstars who hang out 24/7 with their squad of 16 close friends, and we get to watch them do it. And it has been, genuinely, a fucking privilege. 

To end this tale with a personal note, one of the reasons I allowed myself to get so invested in KinnPorsche so fast is because it was evident from every aspect of it -- the show itself, the BTS, the actors interviews -- that the people working on this show both really cared about the show and were genuinely having a great time. There is nothing like seeing art made by people who are passionate about making it! 

Their enthusiasm, their hard work, and their obvious enjoyment of the process & each other’s company are what made me feel like I could trust what they were making, because you could tell no matter what else it was, it was from the heart. And that’s really something special! Especially in this day and age!! 

And even though they could pull it off this time because of the circumstances (financial and social), I hope that it shows BL television CAN be made in a way that keeps the actors comfortable and safe and happy, and encourages change for the better across the industry as a whole. KinnPorsche shouldn’t be the last wild BL passion project; it should be the first one of a new wave. (bangs gavel) Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

[vinceaddams]

Top 5 historic clothing items we should bring back into style (stockings on men, big cuffs on coats etc.)

Well I am very biased, because my everyday clothes are mostly 18th century menswear inspired, but for a list as short as 5 it's good to narrow it down!

1. 18th century shirts. Big puffy soft linen shirts. Best shirts. Comfiest shirts. Though tragically, since they get softer with more washing, they're at their absolute most comfortable right before they wear out.

(This one's from the post where I copied the tiddy-out violinist painting.) Besides being the nicest softest comfiest, they're also the most economical, being made entirely from rectangles. And they're versatile, they look good with lots of different garments! Someday I will do a very detailed youtube tutorial for my machine sewn shirt method. I've done so many now that I think I've finally got it down.

2. Adjustable waistbands. Why did this ever stop being a thing? 18th century breeches have lacing at the back, then in the 19th century trousers have a buckle tab. Now they do not, even though we're all still humans with bodies that change. (These are my orange silk breeches)

Do you know how many hours of my life I've spent taking in or letting out the waist seams of modern trousers? I don't know either, but I've been an alterations tailor since 2019, so it's got to be a fair amount.

All that waist altering wouldn't be necessary if they still made them adjustable! Waistlines fluctuate, so too should waistbands!!

3. Shoulder capes attached to coats. This was a thing in the late 18th century, and in the 19th, and I think into the early 20th too. It adds extra protection from the rain and snow, and it looks cool.

(c. 1812, The Met.)

(c. 1840-60, MFA Boston. The cape on this one is detachable)

You can make them long or short, and stack them up like pancakes or just have one. I've got 2 small ones on my corduroy coat, and one on my dark blue wool. Both cut from almost the same 1790's-ish pattern.

I also want to give a shoutout to fitted sleeves! I love me some two piece sleeves with a distinct elbow! And the coat pockets were bigger back then.

4. Indoor caps. I don't care what era or how fancy you go with it, I just want people to wear caps indoors when it's cold! This one's super simple, it's just a tube of linen tied with a ribbon.

(Detail from Le Marchand d’Orviétan ou l’opérateur Barri by Etienne Jeaurat, 1743.)

If it's cold in your apartment you need slippers for the feets and a cap for the head. Speaking of which.

5. Medieval hoods. This one is wayyy outside my usual era, but the wintery below-freezing weather has just started here and the knit hat I've been wearing isn't quite long enough to cover my ears. I want to make a simple hat with ear flaps, but I also wouldn't be opposed to trying to work something vaguely similar to this into my wardrobe. It looks so warm!

(Image source. Also she has a printable pattern available!) I actually made one of these once, an entire decade ago. But it was scratchy blanket wool and I've since given it away.

That's some of the main things I think we should bring back! There are lots of other things too, like men's nightgowns, and waistcoats with little scenes embroidered on them, but for this list I tried to be mostly practical.

[lil-tachyon]

For the last couple weeks I've been drawing logos / designs for local-ish (mostly NJ, some PA and NY) bands as warmups in the morning. Here's what I've come up with! Massive post below the break explaining each logo + where to find each band and listen to their music.

Teenage Halloween- a staple of New Jersey basements for probably about a decade now and finally getting wider recognition in the last couple years. Pop punk / power pop with a killer horn section. First time I saw them was in New Brunswick playing with Walter Etc. and Blowout. They played a killer cover "Build Me Up Buttercup" and my wife got a black eye in the pit. Recommended tracks: "Brain Song," "666," "Clarity." Their first EP is on a separate bandcamp page btw, check it out here it's great.

Sweet Pill - They will call themselves a Philly band but in my heart they'll always be from Glassboro. Definitely one of the more recognizable names on this list. Emo revival - early stuff is more twinkly, more recent stuff is heavier. All of it's great. Recommended tracks "Nephew," "High Hopes."

Shark Club - Central Jersey's finest. I'm very biased because I actually know these dudes and they did the music for my wedding. Some of the best pop punk you'll hear and the nicest people you'll meet. Recommended tracks: "Game Theory," "Bill Murray," "Heavens to Betsy."

Rest Ashore - My favorite band for the last (oh God I'm old now) eight years. From gut-wrenching emo ballads to virtuoso math-rock instrumentals they do it all. One time I got to sing vocals on "Lucy's Theme" at a house show- thank you Erica! Recommended tracks: "Hjarta," "Chinese Opera," "Devotion," "Soyuz Sweetheart." Too many bangers to name honestly, just deep dive their discography.

Morus Alba - First band I ever went to see at a house show and still one of my absolute favorites. Their music feels like the bridge between the best pitchfork, /mu/ alt rock bands and high energy basement emo. I mean that as a compliment and I hope it comes off as one lol. I should note that since 2019 Morus Alba has morphed from a band into an experimental hip-hop project so later releases sound radically different and basically disconnected from the earlier stuff. Also my favorite release from them, Live at Isabelle's, has been scrubbed from the internet but if you'd like the files just email me. Recommended tracks: "Skyscraper," "Human Resources," "The Goodnight Waltz."

Have a Good Season - another Jersey mainstay that's still going strong. Emo revival in their earlier releases, now with more 70s power pop influences in their newer stuff. See them live, they put on a fantastic show and usually play some great covers in addition to their original music. HaGS guys if you're reading this, please put your version of "Since You've Been Gone" online, I'm begging you. Recommended tracks: "Joseph / Shel Silverstein," (you have to listen to them together for the drop, so good) , "Gum, "Gleaux / Scab." Also, frontman Nic Palermo interviewed me once.

Elephant Jake - If you see any of these bands live make it EJ, they put on such a damn good show. Electrifying indie punk from the Empire State. Recommended tracks: "F.D.C." "Sarah Moyer," "Goodness to Honest," and of course you gotta learn "Sebastien Bauer" for the singalongs.

Blind Lion - Sadly one of the greats that we lost along the way. Defunct since about 2017. I only got to see them once but it was a great performance. Alongside their own stuff they played some killer covers of "Bad Moon Rising" and "Moonage Daydream." I had trouble doing a logo design for them because I actually really like the composition, if not the "Ed Hardy-ness," of their existing logo so what you see here are two separate attempts, neither of which feels entirely satisfying to me. Frontperson Larry Flately currently plays in Nematode and also handled production of Bradley Gardens joke hiphop group The Breakfast Boiz under the moniker "DJ Ova EZ." Recommended tracks: "Brumous," "Dinner."

Fighting Seasons - A band that I sadly found out about too late (via a sticker under the bridge in my town which has since been painted over). 2010s pop punk that packs a helluva punch, especially considering that I'm pretty sure the members were high schoolers for most of the band's existence. I think some members may have gone on to form Sawce (FFO Chon, Polyphia, that type of music) but I can't remember where I read/heard that so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Recommended tracks: "Fighting Seasons," "Oil on Canvas"

Milkmen- Another fallen giant, officially disbanded in 2019. Like Morus Alba, they played the very first house show I attended and their few releases remain on constant rotation in my home. Used to put on a great show and were one of the bands I always thought would make it big until suddenly they weren't around anymore. Frontman Ben Thieberger contributed guitar and vocals to Covid quarantine project Kin if you're looking for a bit of an extra fix but beyond that I don't know what these guys are up to these days, sadly. Recommended tracks: "Ramus," "Johnny Dangerously," "how sieves catch breeze," "K.O.T.H."

Stand and Wave - New York (now Philly) pop punkers delivering instant dopamine hits with every track. Another great live act, see them with EJ if you can! They often play shows together. Recommended tracks: "Convos," "Mrs. Dash," "Splashton Kutcher," "Michael Collins."

My Chemical Romance - You know who they are. While I was drawing all these other logos I ran a poll on Patreon to decide which famous New Jersey band should also be graced with a drawing from me. MCR won the poll by a hefty margin so unfortunately you won't get to see me do an illegible black metal take on Hoboken's Yo La Tengo. I ended up doing two versions: the one with the halo is the first, the one with the bats was the second. I tried to do something kind of thin and elegant with the first one and I don't think it's terrible but I also wasn't quite satisfied with it. For the 2nd attempt I tried to lean into the kind of pulpy, almost horror punk aesthetic of early MCR and I think that one looks better even if it's less original.

Anyway if you took the time to read through all this, thank you very much! And please support these bands! Also If any of the links aren't working please let me know.

-Logan

[theswiftieapple]

Hey I saw you do request and I was wondering if you could do a Phoebe x fem!reader and reader is a new member of the ghostbusters and Phoebe is the one training her

You have a pretty smile

Phoebe Spengler x she/her reader

Phoebe and reader's age; 17

Word count; 6447

Warning; some swearing, I haven't written any fanfiction since 2019 so my writing is rusty and english isn't my mother language.

I hope you like it. :)

Narrator’s POV;

The car ride to the Paranormal Research Center was one filled with excited chatter. Lucky was the one driving y/n, a new member of the Ghostbusters, to meet her new partners in crime. Lucky was the one to introduce y/n to Winston, they met when y/n moved with her family to the USA. Lucky was the one to help Y/n with a heavy box when she was moving in and they started talking. They decided to keep hanging out and Lucky thought y/n's personality would fit them great and she showed great interest in the paranormal. Winston at the time was already on the lookout for a new member, four may be the original number of the Ghostbusters but it's better to have too many than too few. 

Lucky introduced them and Winston got to know y/n, he could tell she had the potential and agreed. That’s how y/n got into this situation, walking to the  Paranormal Research Center, fiddling with her fingers, incredibly nervous. From what she heard the other members were nice people but that wouldn't stop the anxiety.

Lucky glanced at her friend sensing her fear, she put a hand on her shoulder to stop her from walking, the door only a few steps away. “Hey, don’t worry about this too much. You’ll do great and they’ll love you! If something does happen you can always come to me and Winston.”

Y/n turned to look at Lucky as she talked, some of her fear disappearing for a short moment. “We’ll stay friends right?” Lucky smiled reassuringly “Of course, would a hug help?” Y/N nodded to the question receiving a tight hug in return. They pulled apart and y/n sighed deeply turning to the door “Let's get the first meeting over with then” Playing confident she walked to the door, Lucky cheered and clapped her back, then she put her card near the scanner to open the large doors. 

—

“What do you mean by a new member?” Callie asked, confused. “Wait, does that mean one of us is getting fired?” Trevor asked worriedly.

“If so it’s probably you,” Phoebe said seriously, she was of course joking but her brother didn't know that. The little joke didn't calm Trevor who opened his mouth to protest but was cut off by Winston. 

“We have been looking for a new member for the Ghostbusters for months now, there are a few reasons why we wanted to expand the team. There are still many ghosts we need to re-catch even two years after they were all released again thanks to Garraka, another member would be able to help with that. I also think a new member would inject fresh energy and ideas. Someone with a different and new background would give us a new perspective on problems and help us solve things quicker. I genuinely do believe this could help the team.” he explained calmly, he seemed quite happy with his decision.

“Why didn’t you maybe warn us beforehand?” Gary asked, baffled at the information they had been kept in the dark from for months. “Well I didn't want to create any false hope, I wanted us to be sure that we found someone new that none of you know.”

“When are we meeting them?” Phoebe asked curious, there was a small part of her that was worried that the new member could betray them. She shuffled at the thought of Melody, she still has some trouble trusting new people. 

Footsteps were heard approaching the main doors including a small beep indicating someone was about to come in.

“Right now” Winston smiled as he turned to the door.

“Wait what” Trevor asked bewildered as he and his family turned to the door.

Lucky walked into the lab with a pretty girl next to her. Phoebe's eyes widened at the realization of what she just thought. 

“This is y/n! Y/n this is your new team” Phoebe's eyes stayed focused on her new team member as Winstron introduced them. “y/n this is Callie'' Callie smiled at Y/n shaking her hand gently. “This is Gary” Gary shot her a smile as well shaking her hand. “This is Trevor, Callies son,” 

“I’m the cool one of the group,” Trevor explained, shaking her hand while smiling proudly. 

Phoebe’s POV

“And this is Phoebe, Callies daughter”  My eyes met hers as we shook hands. I forgot for a second that we weren’t alone, so I let go and sent her an awkward smile, my hand still tingling from the feeling. Why am I feeling like this? Did I just call her pretty in my head? Why is my hand tingling like this?

I was so busy with these thoughts and observing the newcomer that I didn’t notice the glances my brother shared with Lucky, scheming glances.

“She’s new to this, so she is going to need someone to train her and I was hoping one of you could do it” Winston explained, “Phoebe could do it.” My head snapped to look at my brother, giving him a ‘what the fuck’ look. “Phoebe is the smartest one in our team” I could hear Dad whisper a small ouch, “she's the one who's been using our equipment the longest and they’re close in age! How old are you?” He asked y/n, “I’m seventeen-” She was cut off by Trevor clapping his hands, “perfect! What do you think sis?” Trevor teased, ignoring my glare as he put his arm on my shoulder. 

“I-uhm sure” I answered nervously, “Well that’s great then! She is going to be living with you, my men are already cleaning the empty room and assembling the furniture as we speak”

“What empty room?” Mom asked surprised, “There’s no empty room in the firehouse”, I could see y/n being confused like the rest of us except for Lucky and Winston. “The room behind the bookshelf next to Tevor and Phoebe's room of course”

“There’s been an empty room behind one of our bookshelves and you didn't tell us?” 

Winston shrugged at my dad, “I thought you all knew but didn’t use it” He said simply.

“What’s next, a second bathroom?” Trevor jokes, and the glance shared between Lucky and Winston speaks volumes. “ You’re kidding”

“Well then, that’s that, as I said my men are working right now and they should be done very soon. Y/n’s uniform and an extra proton pack and all the other things are being sorted as we speak. I’m just going to have a small talk with Callie and Gary about some things, you guys could get acquainted with each other during that time.” Winston signals my parents to follow him to another room.

Y/n POV;

“It’s an honour to finally meet you guys, I’ve heard a lot of fantastic things about you,” I tell them, the nerves still haven’t disappeared and neither has the excitement. I’m worried they won’t like me, I could feel Phoebe? I think her name was glancing at me. I have to admit she is quite attractive and cute. 

I feel warmth on my cheeks as I keep thinking about her. I can’t think like that about her right now, I just met her. Plus she’s going to be my teammate and that could complicate things. I’ll have to ignore this small..crush, if I can call it that, for now. 

“Thank you, I’m sure we’re going to have lots of fun together,” Trevor said with a small smirk on his face as he put his arm around me. I didn’t notice the teasing smirk he sent his sister or the glare she sent back. “So there is something I have to warn you about,” He said as he and Lucky led me to the famous Ectomobile with Phoebe following behind. “About what?” I ask, worried.

“It’s about a ghost called Slimer, he lives with us”

“What.” I state giving him a serious and worried look as we enter the car.

—

“I think I’ll stay clear of the attic then,” I say as we exit the car. The conversation did drift a lot in the car, I didn’t mind too much since it was nice observing and learning more about them. They all talked except for Phoebe who kept quiet for most of the ride. I could feel her glance at me a few times, she was clearly in thought the whole ride.

“Yeah that’s probably the smarter decision, you should have seen Trevor when he met Slimmer for the first time” Callie teased ruffling her son's hair.

“Mom!” 

“Well then as nice as it is talking with all of you, I am going to have to steal y/n here, I’m going to be the one helping her decorate and sort out her room. If you’ll excuse us” Lucky said, sending them a smile before dragging me away to my new room.

Narrator’s POV;

“What’s up with you?” 

Phoebe turned to look at her mom, acting oblivious. “What do you mean?” Callie came closer wearing a teasing look. “I mean that you’ve been very quiet since we met our new member, lost in thought.”

“And lost in her eyes” Trevor teased as he walked away snickering, Phoebe grabbed a random towel and threw it at him, hitting him in the back, and he scurried off after that. 

“Well your brother isn't completely wrong, everything okay?” Callie asked, her worry present in her eyes. Phoebe stared at her shoes, for a moment, “I’m alright, don’t worry about it Mom” She left with that, lost in her thoughts.

—

“So, you and Phoebe” Lucky started as she opened a box full of different books. “Don’t start” y/n warns, Lucky turns to her friend with a knowing look. 

“I have a very strong feeling you have a small crush on her.” 

“I don’t”

Lucky made a sound of disagreement while making a face, “Maybe not yet, but you feel something, I can tell” she sang the last part, dodging a small pencil case, her smirk not faltering.

“I know your type, remember you told me” 

“Yeah because we made a deal that you would tell me who you like in return, and that someone is in this building as we speak.” y/n teased back. Lucky opened her mouth to try and form words, her cheeks having a red hue to them. “This isn’t about me and that someone-”

“Trevor you mean”

Y/n snorted at the look she received. “As I was saying, this is about you and Phoebe and the small crush that's going to grow stronger with time, she is quite literally what you described your type to me, short hair, fluffy or curly, glasses, a nerd-”

“Yeah, I get it” Y/n grumbles as she puts her bed lining on, “can you help me with this?” She raises the comforter pleadingly. Lucky stands up and helps her even it out. “I just don't want to label these feelings since we just met, besides the chances of her liking me isn’t zero but it’s also unlikely right now”

Lucky put a hand on her friend's shoulder comfortingly, “As your friend it's my job to remind you that there is a good chance she may like you back” Y/n played with one of her pillows thoughtfully. “I don’t want to rush anything, maybe she will and maybe she won’t but thank you”Lucky smiled back at her friend, “Now where do you want me to put these CDs” 

Y/n smiled and showed her friend. 

—

Y/n’s POV;

Dinner went nicely, I mostly listened as the family shared a few recent stories about the ghosts they’ve captured lately. Phoebe was quiet through most of it. I could tell the way she was behaving wasn't normal, I noticed thanks to the small looks her family were giving her. 

I got comfortable in bed and stared outside the window, it was pouring. I hope I didn’t upset her with being here, if I did I could see why. I am a total stranger that just appeared today, she was then told I would live with her and her family at the same time. It’s a lot of new information and a lot of new changes. 

I turned on a show on my phone to fall asleep too. I lost consciousness In a matter of a few minutes, hoping tomorrow would go well.

—

I woke up to soft knocking, I turned around to look at the door, squinting to see who it was. “Good morning, breakfast is going to be ready in half an hour, I wanted to make sure you were awake.” I sent Gary a smile and muttered a small thank you and with that, he disappeared.

I sat up and stared at my lap thoughtfully. Today was my first official day as a Ghostbuster or at least a Ghostbuster in training. 

Phoebe was going to be the one training me, I’m already dreading the weight of the proton pack. With those thoughts I stand up and get ready for the day, dressing in something comfortable and doing my hair.

I walk out of my room and glance at the firefighter pole, it’s too early in the morning for that and I’m not in the mood to land in the hospital on my first day so I walk down the stairs. I was met with the sight of Gary cooking and Trevor stealing some of the fruit when he wasn't looking. 

“Good morning,” I say and sit down on one of the chairs at the kitchen island. “Good morning!” Gary smiled as he flipped a pancake, “Morning!” Trevor said with a mouth full of strawberries. “So how are you feeling about your first day?” Gary asked, trying to start a conversation.

“I’m a bit nervous, I’ve never done anything like this before but I am excited,” I explained fiddling with my fingers. “You’ll do great I’m sure! With Phoebe as your teacher, it’ll all go great.” 

I smiled and whispered a small thank you. “Do you need any help?” I ask, ready to stand up. “Nah, I’ve got this but thank you” Gary told me as he put the pan away, I could see him playfully swap Trevor's hand away from the cut fruit. 

“Where’s Phoebe?” Trevor asked, sitting next to me, he put his fist underneath his chin. “She woke up early, she’s visiting Podcast and Dr Ray, she had something to discuss with them. I don’t know what it is though” Gary explained as he put plates in front of me and Trevor, I took a sip out of the glass in front of me.

“So what do you guys usually do when there isn’t a ghost to bust?” I asked as I put some toppings on my pancake. 

—

Phoebe’s POV;

I opened the door to Dr Ray’s shop, “Morning Dr Ray” I said as I entered, he looked up at me surprised. “Morning Phoebe, you’re here earlier than usual”

“I wanted to talk with Podcast about something, is he here or?”

“I’m right here!” He said, his head poking out from the door behind Dr Ray, “ I'll see you later then” Dr Ray smiles and continues to read a book. I go in and walk after Podcast, “So what’s up?”

“There’s a new ghostbuster on the team” I blurted out. He stops in his tracks and turns to look at me. “There’s a new ghostbuster?” He asked excitedly, “Is that bad or?” He raised an eyebrow noticing my attitude.

I leaned against his desk before I continued speaking “It’s not bad, she seems...nice” I started, he did a hand signal telling me to continue “I’m the one who's going to be training her and well” I stopped talking not knowing how to continue. Podcast gave me a look.

“What?”

“You’re acting weird, does the idea of training her bother you or?” 

I shake my head “No, it doesn’t, I just feel..nervous” 

Podcast flings one of the Pufts that was bothering him as I speak before he responds “Why are you nervous? Are you worried she might betray us and release a great evil that we’re going to have to defeat?” He asks, I give him a deadpan look. “Listen if you are worried about that, that would be okay. I’m just trying to understand what the problem is here.” He reasons, sending me a concerned look.

I put a hand in my hair, messing with it. “That’s the problem, I don’t even know what's bothering me about this situation exactly. I met her yesterday and she’s staying with us now as well. She does seem nice, Winston and Lucky recruited her, I know they have good instincts but” I sigh deeply grimacing. “I don’t know, there’s some weird feeling in me and I’m worried about what it could be and what it could turn into.”

“You’re scared that you like her?” Podcasts asks bluntly, “I just met her, there’s no way I have feelings already.'' I protest, “But, the way I’m feeling right now, is similar to how I felt when meeting Melody, but it's also different. I don’t understand it and I hate not understanding things.”

There was silence for a moment until Podcast spoke, “Well I don’t think you’ll understand what that feeling is for a good while. You two just met, there could be special feelings involved but you won’t know for sure for a while. I suggest just letting those feelings take their course.”

“Why didn’t I think of that,” I say out loud, Podcast patted my shoulder “That’s what I’m here for, being the voice of reason”

—

I walked into the firehouse after having a long talk with Podcast. I still don’t like the idea of unknown feelings and I am worried about feeling something for someone again but there isn’t anything I can do about it. 

“Uno!” A collecting group of groaning was heard alongside a laugh. 

I walk into the room to see My family playing Uno with y/n and Lucky. “How do you win so much, this is the fifth time” Trevor whined, putting his head on the table. “Magic” y/n says jokingly doing jazz hands, “I have two other card games that I think you’d like” 

“Do you have ‘Frantic’ with you?” Lucky asked, but before she could answer the alarm went off, signalling there was a ghost loose causing havoc. “Hey Phoebs! Let’s go!”Mom said as she rushed off, Gary and Trevor following, “Hey y/n, we can start with the training when I get back” I called out to her, “Lucky and you could meet me at the Research Center after we bust this ghost” I say awkwardly shooting her some finger guns before turning around and walking away quickly, hoping the heat that I feel on my cheeks wasn’t what I thought it was and if it is then that they didn't notice.

Narrator’s POV;

Lucky and y/n cleaned up after themselves soon after and drove to the Paranormal Research Center. Y/n went to a changing room to put on her uniform. She walked out nervous, “Does it look okay?” She asked, Lucky turned around and gasped, “You look amazing!! Do a spin!” She asked excitedly while clapping. Y/n did as asked. 

“It suits you perfectly!” She said hugging her friend. “Thank you, you’re too nice”  Lucky pulled away, “I bet when Phoebe sees you in it, her jaw will drop” Y/n rolled her eyes playfully “We’ll see about that. So while we wait why don't you update me on that new ghost you’ve been studying on” 

Lucky’s smile widened, excited to share her new discoveries, she grabbed y/n’s wrist and dragged her to her working station.

Phoebe walked into the lab an hour later, fixing her hair from all the wind. She could see Lucky explaining something while y/n listened patiently, wearing her Ghostbusters uniform. Phoebe had to force herself to not stare for too long, so she walked up to the two of them. “And that’s why we had to make sure those two weren’t next to each other, I swear I couldn't focus properly the whole time” 

“Hey there, sorry to interrupt your conversation, but are you ready for your first training session?” Phoebe asks, standing in front of them.“Yeah, I am! We’ll continue with our talk later” Y/n told Lucky before turning to Phoebe again who led her to the small training room. “The uniform suits you, not many can pull it off”

Y/n turned to look at Phoebe surprised, a small blush on her cheeks, “thank you, you look great in it too” she says, hoping that wasn’t too straightforward. “So, Winston said you have no prior experience”

Y/n nodded, “I have never used any of this equipment, correct.”

Phoebe crossed her arms nodding, “alright then, first thing first is to put the proton pack on, you can put it on normally like a backpack.” Y/n did as told, she let out a little grunt at the weight.” I knew they would be heavy but wow, now what next?” she asked excitedly.

“You hold this part, the particle thrower, you can also call it a particle gun” The new member did as told before looking at Phoebe again nodding. “Wait, can I show you something?” Phoebe asked, she got a nod as a response. 

She stepped closer, only centimetres apart as she helped y/n hold it properly, putting her hands where they are supposed to be. “ See that ghost up there,” Phoebe asked, focusing on the task at hand, trying to ignore her own bubbling feelings. She was so busy that missed y/n staring at her face, a blush forming. “Yeah i-uh do” y/n responds, trying to focus as well.

She’s holding a dangerous weapon, she’s seen what they could do online, she needs to focus, she tells herself.  “Okay, I’m going to help you with this one and show you how to turn it on. Are you ready?” Phoebe asked, glancing at her, “Yes I am.”

“Okay you switch it on like this” Phoebe explained as she turned it on with y/n, “when you’re ready to shoot you press this button right here, on the count of three, ready?

Y/n took a deep breath in before answering “Ready”

“1” Phoebe starts, glancing at y/n.

“2,” She says tightening her grip, y/n tries to steady her breathing.

“3”

With that they shot at the ghost made out of wood, It falling apart in two. Y/n’s jaw dropped, “That’s how you’re going to practise, the actual thing takes longer and needs more strength but our priority is to perfect your aim for now, the charged particle accelerator is a weapon of science that can cause a lot of damage if used incorrectly and without proper practice.”

“First of all that was awesome” Y/n stated with a wide smile on her face, “two, I’ve heard of all of that, Lucky told me about some of your bigger damages. It’s impressive how something so dangerous can be something that helps so many people'' Y/n rambles, observing the damage with interest. While she was distracted Phoebe looked at all her features close up. She could feel her cheeks turning red from all the close proximity. She slowly pulled away crossing her arms, not knowing how to act.

“Well whenever you’re ready, you can start practising, I’ll be here the whole time, so if you need any help just tell me” Phoebe said while rubbing the back of her neck. Y/n nodded as another ghost came down, Phoebe didn't stray far, staying a few steps away just in case. 

Y/n took a deep breath before shooting, hitting the wooden ghost on the side, she stumbled backwards, and Phoebe caught her in time, holding the particle thrower with her. “Okay that was your first time on your own and it went better than expected.”

“Better than expected?” Y/n asked embarrassed, “Yeah, you’re doing okay, try again, I’ll stay closer to catch you if that happens again okay?” 

Outside of the training room, Lucky was observing their interactions with a small scheming smirk. “What are you smirking at?” Lars asked as he opened the spirit extractor, taking a spirit-free plushie out of it.

“No reason,” Lucky answered, ignoring the eyebrow raise of Lars, he shook his head and walked away to continue working. 

The training went on until 5 pm, y/n was exhausted after all the trying, her arms sore, but it was all worth it, the thought of capturing ghosts excited her. Phoebe opened the door of the training room letting her out first, y/n nodded and muttered a small thank you as she walked out. “Keep this up and I think you’ll be ready to go out with me- “ she cut herself off quickly, trying to correct herself “I mean go out with us on missions soon.” 

She tried not to look at y/n's face, she didn’t want to make it any more awkward.

As they were walking to the main doors, saying their goodbyes to the other workers, Lars called out “Y/n!”

The said person turned around to look at the scientist, “Lucky asked me to tell you that she’s going to come to visit and help out more with your room around 6 pm”

“Thank you, have a nice night!” 

Phoebe bit her lip for a second before continuing with their walk, Gary was picking them up today. She looked at Y/n who was walking beside her. Did..she and Lucky maybe have something going on? She turned around quickly when she met eyes with y/n.

“I hope not,” Phoebe whispers to herself, “What did you say?” Y/n asked curious, Phoebe straightened her back, she opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. Luckily for her, Gary appeared with the Ectomobile, saving her for now.

“Hey there you two! Are you ready to go home?” He asked with a wide smile.

They both got in the car and put their seatbelts on, the car ride back was quiet, the only background noise being the music playing on the radio.

The evening wasn't much different than last night, Phoebe disappeared to her room and didn’t come out until morning, leaving y/n slightly confused and worried.

—

Phoebe sat on one of the chairs at the kitchen island, drinking some coffee while tapping her pencil on the island, thinking, trying to calm down. The idea of having to be so close to y/n made her giddy and scared her at the same time. 

She was worried she would make it awkward like last night if Gary didn’t appear when he did…

She sighed, putting her pencil and coffee down, putting her head in her hands, staring at the open notebook, full of scribbles, she couldn’t focus on her work. Her head was filled with images of last night, her heartbeat picking up remembering how close she was to y/n. She couldn’t lie, she missed the warmth of her hands underneath hers, they were soft. She let her mind wander, imagining how they would feel properly holding her hands.

“Phoebe, are you doing okay?”

Her hands slammed on the table making the coffee spill by accident, she turned to look at the newcomer. “Oh, hi,” Phoebe said brushing imaginary dust off of her shirt” Hi” she leaned on the island crossing her arms, sending y/n an awkward smile. “Hi”

In her head, Phoebe was cursing herself out, ‘three hi’s??’

Y/n glanced at the spilt coffee and then back to Phoebe, with a questioning look, before she could repeat the question, she got an answer.  “I’m doing okay, alright, doing great.” Phoebe cringed at her repetitive awner, Y/n walked closer, her face not changing. Phoebe put a hand underneath her chin, trying to act normal. “Are you sure about that? I called your name three times and you didn’t notice” 

“I was thinking,” she answered quickly. 

“May I ask what you were thinking about?”

“Science.”

Y/n blinked, staring at Phoebe, waiting for her to continue while Phoebe avoided her eyes at all costs. Deciding to change the subject, she pointed at the spilt coffee, “Do you maybe need help cleaning that or?”

Phoebe glanced at the spilt coffee before standing up and getting some paper towels to clean it up. “Right, right, you’re right”

“Alright then, I’ll go and..do a thing” Y/n said walking backwards before turning around to get ready for the day. “Oh good morning Trevor” and with that she disappeared up the stairs.

Phoebe cursed under her breath, “How much of that did you hear?”

“Oh you mean how much did I hear of your nervous rambling? Pretty much all of it” Trevor says casually, walking closer. “So, you and” he points his fingers behind him. “Ya know”

“There’s nothing going on” Phoebe defends throwing the paper towels away. “Nothing at all?”

“Nothing at all”

“Not even a smalllll thing” He pries, making his pointer finger and thumb almost touch. “Not even a small thing” Phoebe shrugs nonchalantly. Trevor nods, letting the silence settle before asking another question. “So, what science thing were you thinking about?”

Phoebe leans on the now clean island again trying to find the words, she sighed “I wasn’t actually thinking about science,”

“Then what?” Trevor interrupted. Phoebe sent him a glare before continuing “I was just thinking about all the things I could teach her today.”

“Y/n you mean?”

Phoebe nodded in response.

“Were you thinking about how close you’re going to be again today?” Trevor questions while picking out an apple from the bowl. Phoebe stood up straight but before she could retort, Trevor interrupted her “Lucky told me all about how close you were yesterday.” He informed Phoebe with a smirk on his face.

Steps were heard coming down the stairs, “We’ll continue this after your little date today” Trevor whispered. “Training” Phoebe corrected.

“Good Morning” Callie greeted, walking over to the coffee machine. “I need to get ready for the day,” Phoebe says, grabbing her pencil and notebook and heading off to her room. 

“Did I miss something?” Callie asked her son, pouring herself a coffee in her favourite mug. “Not much” Trevor shrugged, taking a bite out of his apple. 

—

The following days were filled with not only bettering y/n’s aim but awkward moments as well, or that’s what Phoebe thought, y/n thought her awkwardness was adorable. Phoebe also learned that Lucky, the traitor, was feeding her brother information daily about her and y/n’s interactions. Specifically the more ‘embarrassing’ ones. 

Phoebe crossed her arms thinking, watching y/n put away the proton pack, “I think you’re ready to train with real ghosts”

Y/n turned around “real ghosts?”

“Real ghosts,” Phoebe repeated.

A wide smile appeared on y/n’s face, excitement prominent on her face. 

The next day they were driven out to an open area. Trevor and Lucky stayed back in the car while they walked out. “The reason I want you to train with real ghosts before going on missions is so that you’ve trained with more than just a painted ghost made out of wood, some real experience. If anything happens I’ll be right here”

“I brought a few of the traps, they have different ghosts, you'll do one at a time of course. You’ll be the one busting it and I’ll be the one trapping it.” She explained as she put a trap on the ground, putting the foot pedal where they’ll be standing. “Are you ready?”

Y/n nodded confidently, raising the particle thrower, and turning it on.

In the blink of an eye, the ghost trap opened, and a big orange ghost appeared. Y/n cringed slightly at the look of it. When it noticed her she shot right at it, hitting it. She grimaced at the strength that was needed, it’s not as hard as she imagined but it’s not easy either. “Keep going, I'll wait a moment before trapping it, it usually takes a while for us to trap it after we caught it”

No response came back, y/n tried to focus on the ghost, and after a few seconds, the ghost was sucked into the trap.

“Good Job!” Phoebe sent a smile as she picked up the trap, “Oh my arms are going to be so sore tomorrow” y/n groaned.

“That’s the point of training, to improve your skills.” Phoebe reminds, “Oh really? I thought the point of all of this was to torture me” Y/n jokes, panting from what she just had to do. “I'll call it torture and you can call it training. Deal?

Y/n reached out to shake hands, Phoebe glanced at her hand before shaking it. “Alright then, deal.”

“Now this ghost is bigger, you ready?” Phoebe asked, putting a second trap down. 

“Ready.” The sound of the proton pack turning on again was heard. A giant ghost appeared. Y/n immediately shot at it, gritting her teeth as she held it back.

“So, a photon is checking into a hotel” Phoebe starts speaking, y/n turns her head to look at her confused. She let out a small yelp as the ghost pulled harder, luckily for her it didn't break free.

“What-”

“Keep going,” Phoebe tells her, “I’ll start again, a photon is checking into a hotel”

Y/n looked back at the ghost, it was a feisty one. “So the bellhop asks, ‘Do you need help with your luggage?’”

Y/n sighed deeply, focusing on the ghost, she shot Phoebe a few glances, ‘Is..she telling a joke right now??’ “Towards that, the photon responds ‘No thanks, I’m travelling light’” She winks at Y/n.

It was silent for a moment until a snort was heard, “alright that one was good” She says snickering, “Please catch it now my arms are hurting” Phoebe did as told, it being sucked into the trap. The sound of the proton pack turning off was heard, and she sighed in relief. “It’s one of my favourite jokes,”  she explains picking up the trap. “I can see why, it's good, but why were you telling me jokes right now? Not that I mind.”

“When we’re on missions, there’s always chatter happening between us, maybe some bystanders, and I wanted to test if you could focus while being told a great joke.”

“So does this mean you’ll keep telling jokes during training?” Y/n asks, stretching her head. “Would you consider that a bad thing?” 

Y/n looks at Phoebe, who is picking out a new trap, “I don’t think it's a bad thing, I like jokes and puns” she explains, she could feel a warmth creeping up her neck as she admired Phoebe underneath the sunlight. A small smile formed.

‘she’s so pretty’

“Well it’s good you don’t mind since I have many more” Phoebe says preparing for another ghost. Y/n looked away when Phoebe walked over. “Good to hear” 

—

“How long do you think it’ll take until they start dating?” Trevor thought for a second before answering Lucky, ”eight maybe nine months max”

“I give it..three weeks, ”

“That’s quick”

“Look at them” Lucky points at the two outside of the car, training. Y/n was laughing after a joke Phoebe made, Phoebe stared at her with a smile, saying something they couldn’t hear from inside the car, but it had to be something funny considering the laughing wasn't stopping. “I bet you five bucks Phoebes using her jokes and unknowingly winning y/n over.”

“Five bucks?” Trevor asked, raising an eyebrow, “What? Five bucks is a lot in this economy” Lucky shrugged before putting a chip in her mouth.

—

“I think you’re ready to go on your first mission” Phoebe says, breaking the silence while they put away their gear. 

“Really?” Y/n asks excitedly, “Yeah, you did very well.” Phoebe smiles softly, “Plus you think my jokes are funny, if you’re with us then it won't be just Gary laughing at them”

“Ah so my sucking up worked” Y/n jokes, “I don’t think that’s what happened, you seemed genuinely happy and were laughing quite a lot,” Phoebe tells her, leaning on the locker. “I am an amazing actor” Y/n explains, Phoebe leans closer so they're face to face, inches away from each other. “Oh no person is that good of an actor, you even turned red from laughing, come on admit it, my jokes are hilarious”

Y/n tried to act casual, a small part of her was happy that Phoebe didn't realise she was blushing because of her back there as well. Y/n hums, pretending to think, before answering “They were alright”

Phoebe raised an eyebrow making y/n put a hand on her mouth to not let a giggle out, “They were alright?”, Phoebe got a nod in return, “you’re lying” Phoebe reasons, “I’m not”

“You are”

“No”

“If you aren’t lying, then there shouldn’t be a smile behind that hand” 

Y/N shakes her head, “Come on, remove it” Phoebe teases, she gets another shake of the head as a response, she could see y/n shaking slightly from holding in laughs. “Come on, let me see” Phoebe asks, grabbing Y/ns wrist softly, removing her hand to reveal a wide smile. “So you agree I’m funny.”

“Okay maybe you are” Y/n shrugs, just then realising how close their faces were to each other, her breath hitched, her eyes drifting to Phoebe’s lips for a second before returning to look into her eyes. Her wrist, where Phoebe was holding her felt warm, she resisted the urge to properly hold her hand. “You have a pretty smile” Phoebe whispered, lost in thought. ”It’s all thanks to you, being around you makes me happy” Y/n whispered back. 

The only thing they could hear was the sounds of each other's breathing and their own heartbeats. They leaned it close, eyes trained on each other, lips almost touching but before anything could happen they heard the Ectomobile from outside. They pulled away quickly, realising what they almost did blushing.

Callie walked in backwards helping Gary park the Ectomobil. “Oh hey there, how was training?” Callie asked, curious. “It went great,” Phoebe answers, clearing her throat. Callie glanced between them both, noticing the tension, both of them were blushing, Phoebe rubbing the back of her neck and Y/n had her arms crossed, refusing to look at each other. Callie made an ‘oh’ face, realising what might have been happening before they came home.

“I have to go” Y/n says quickly, “so do I” Phoebe responds, they both try to go in the same direction, but they both stop before Y/n ushered Phoebe to go first, walking after her. “Lucky just might win that bet,” Trevor states, him and Gary entering as well. “What bet?” Callie questioned.

“Uhhh nothing” Trevor shrugs walking up to the apartment as well.

Part 2

[rainbowsky]

GG and the Duomo di Milano

Duomo 2019 (left), 2023 (right) and 2024 (top).

He has posted a photo of it whenever he goes to Milan, since his first trip there in 2019. Here's my CPN on that.

Fake, fan fiction, CPN.

Of course, as an artist and a photographer it makes sense that GG is interested in this beautiful building. Gorgeous intricate architecture that is covered in lifelike statues, no doubt it is very satisfying to photograph. It's truly one of the most stunning cathedrals in the world. But we're turtles, so we're always going to look at things from a slightly different angle.

This CPN first came up back in 2019, the first time he went to Milan. GG said in an interview that he was excited to see the cathedral, and he posted a picture of it on his Weibo account. Turtles at the time speculated that GG was inspired by the photos that were all over the news in 2016, when same sex marriage was legalized there.

It was the location of massive LGBTQ rallies when same sex marriage was being debated and put to a vote, and was the site of equally massive celebrations when that vote won.

Some people are skeptical of this connection because they feel that the time gap of a couple years is too large for it to be relevant, but to me those people can't possibly understand how significant the same sex marriage fight is to queer people who wish to marry (and who wish to have their human rights recognized in general).

Especially around that time in history, when the fight was at its most active globally. There was a period of a few years where the issue was constantly in the news, as more and more countries were gradually recognizing legal rights for same sex couples. Images of those protests and celebrations were inspiring and exciting for queer people all over the world, and those who cared a lot about the issue followed that news pretty closely.

This is an issue of significance to queer people everywhere, even those who don't want to marry. It represents a shift toward acceptance and toward broader legal recognition of equal human rights for queer people.

Same sex marriage is a huge hurdle toward equality for anyone whose rights are at stake, because most of the opposition to human rights for queer people tends to come from religious groups and conservatives with narrow notions of 'family values'. When societies acknowledge - even on paper - that queer families are legitimate, the biggest barrier has been crossed.

Based on a lot of things I've seen from GG over the years I believe he's very deeply invested in Pride and gay rights. He's not at liberty to be as open about it as he'd like to be, but I believe he shows what he can. I have talked about that in more detail in this post.

I also believe that marriage is something that both GG and DD care a lot about. They are each others anchors in life, and even when they don't get to spend a lot of time together, they are home to each other. DD has also talked about wanting a son, and GG has also shown interest in children and family and often talks about a simple life.

They just ooze domesticity on many levels, and I think that even if it doesn't fit within their lives right now, they probably talk about and think about building a family together one day. And given the culture in China their parents likely want that for them as well.

I talked about the possibility they might already be married in this post. I talked about the possibility of them wanting kids in this post about DD saying he wanted a son, and later in this one from an OOL interview where GG mentioned envying Gu Wei's life.

Both GG and DD strike me as being connected to queer culture, just given some of their jokes, attitudes, etc. and some of the people they're associated with. Even their experience with filming CQL (which I talked about in this post). They're also both from the younger generation in China, which is much more progressive and informed on these issues.

All of this leads me to believe that it's not an accident that this landmark has captured GG's imagination.

The Duomo is also a very popular wedding/romantic photo destination, and where couples often propose.

I think that it's romantic that GG posted the moon over the cathedral this time. There are a lot of fake rumors and CPN around GG and DD and the moon, and turtles believe that they often send pictures of the moon to each other. They've both posted photos of the moon on social media in the past.

There have been a lot of posts about their connection with the moon over the years. A few of my favorites are Pie's post from Mid-Autumn Festival, Pie's post about Midsummer Moon (among other things) and of course the LRLG rumor that talks about DD taking pictures of the moon for GG.

Given what this landmark might mean to GG, it makes this photo even more special.

Or he could just enjoy photographing a pretty building. We'll likely never know for sure.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the AH for refusing to change my online handle for someone else to use?

It's come to my attention I apparently stole a username handle? Which is confusing since I ended up looking when I made my tumblr and when they made their instagram. I made my tumblr in 2016 and have not changed the username while they made their instagram in 2019 and their page info has that they've changed their username twice in this time span.

So, they run an instagram page and have some fans. I won't say what their instagram page is filled with to avoid doxing, but what I post on my tumblr is completely different than what they post. I do also have this username for other sites where I post works I too. Now, when I made this tumblr I made the decision I would be a content creator and would be careful what I post since I've been chronically stalked by several people from IRL for years. I will admit, I haven't been able to post updates or creations regularly cause I started going back to school in 2016. However, during the summer semester I would take off is when I'd work nonstop to make content and post to my tumblr. During 2021 I got an anon saying to change my url since I go so long without updating and to give the url to someone else. I was appalled. Covid was very hard for me as it was to others, but I decided to use that as a wakeup call. I set up a queue to have several things reblogged a day and took part in many content challenges I could find. Late last year I had to turn off anon since I got another anon message telling me I'm using someone else's handle. Now, if this person contacts me I'm open to discussing their problems cause those anons were uncalled for. However, I refuse to change my handle. I picked it specifically for my content and I won't apologize for working on myself and going back to school to try getting a nicer job than the previous job I worked. I really do enjoy making content, just life happens so I can't change it. I guess what I'm asking is am I the AH for refusing to change usernames cause someone on instagram has their own fan base for different content? I won't list where else I have this username, but let's just say I have it all most social media's except instagram.

What are these acronyms?

[gamora-borealis]

incoming dangender thoughts: the more I read up/watch the stuff dan has said about gender after BIG + reflect on what he said in BIG I'm like. y'all she really has been explicitly trying to tell us his gender IS formless blob (without making it a huge deal in the mainstream public eye), but so many people haven't actually been taking him seriously! like. labels are made up, dan has pretty much said as much before. why do we have to have a specific approved™ term to consider them genderqueer/nonbinary/trans? those are descriptive labels and dan has been using a fun descriptive label they created that he defined for us in BIG, a definition that matches up with those other labels! and dan has said since 2019 that he is comfortable with any pronouns even though he still mainly uses he/him. like, lately dan has been using more she/her and they/them for herself and experimenting with being more femme and/or androgynous in various ways, and what is changing is not even necessarily gender (although maybe who knows), but probably that dan is finally feeling more comfortable with different kinds of gender presentation and pronouns than she typically uses. because low-key gender is kind of a performance and it's scary to switch it up sometimes but dan feels safe doing so especially with their audience and I think that's actually really special 🧡 but moral of the story, dangender has actually been out in the open since 2019 and I wish more people picked up on that!

[serendipnpipity]

Favorite DnP Tour Song Statistics

Settle round, little ducklings, do I have some statistics to share with you all!!

A grand total of 156 people participated in this survey, so thank you if you took the time to fill it out! 🧡

As a teaser, here’s a pie chart of the votes for your favorite song! We’ll be discussing this in depth in its own section but I know some of you f*ck vibe with pie charts more than the bar charts I use there…

To give you a clear vision of what we’ll be looking at, here are the categories of the upcoming analysis:

Phandometrics (community growth on a viewership & fandom scale)

Favorite Song (general)

Favorite Song vs. Phandometrics (the main hypothesis!)

Honorable Mentions (fun little quirks I noticed along the way)

Ready? Time to read on.

PHANDOMETRICS

Lag between year started watching -> year joined the phandom. This can be seen most obviously in the 2009-2015 portion of the graph, likely when the community was just building up. I went back to check individual points, and many people seem to join a year or two after starting to watch.

Three distinct peaks of phandom growth: 2015 (dnp popularity peak), 2019 (coming out), and 2023 (dnpg comeback, dnp renaissance). Pretty expected, but still cool to see!

The difference between the peaks when you look at viewership vs. phandom is interesting though! Especially 2019 seems to be a huge spike in viewership, but the phandom growth seems a little more gradual (maybe more people lurked at first, then joined the phandom in 2023 once they were more active?).

The 2012 peak is really interesting. Most popular year to start watching from this sample, apparently!

FAVORITE SONG

"The Internet is Here" won 51.3% of the votes... which didn't surprise me all that much. It's iconic, okay?

II is about half as popular, and beyond the song qualities themselves, I wonder if a contributing factor to this pattern could be its lack of availability as an officially released song.

I think Everything's Fine is so low partially bc I closed the poll before WAD released to prevent the recency effect from skewing the data. (Especially because I thought we were getting "Everything's Fine (Acoustic)" smh.)

FAVORITE SONG VS. PHANDOMETRICS

By era...

I had a hypothesis: based on the year you joined, which I now realize in my head wrongly equated with the year you were most active in, you'd be more biased towards the song of that era bc a) you were more likely to go to the tour or b) epic nostalgia hit.

Yeah, I was wrong.

When you group the eras you see that TIIH wins in almost every single group by a similar proportion to the total, which means this attitude is fairly evenly distributed amongst the phannies.

By year...

Separating by year, you begin to see that, hold up, the hypothesis could have some merit! In either 2017 or 2018 on both graphs, the II finale actually does win.

The super high TIIH votes bleeding in from 2015/2016 and from 2019 seemed to mask this pattern.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

I have no idea what happened here but both ways you slice it, Interactive Introverts was fighting for its life amongst the 2012 phannies???

We got three phannies that have been watching since 2009!! The fact that people have been sticking around so long (up to fifteen years!!! and this was only a sample of 156 of us!!!) is really heartwarming for me bc it's a testament to how strong of a community dnp have built their viewership to be.

At the end of the day, what can I say? That was a lot of statistics. I hope you enjoyed or took something away from this little survey. Lmk if you notice any other cool trends or have any theories on what the data means!

Thank you for listening to my yapping; have an orange heart.

🧡

[rivalsforlife]

Ace Attorney 456 Tokyo Game Show Information Masterpost

Since I haven't seen all the information collected in one place, this post SHOULD be a comprehensive review of everything revealed today - though please let me know if I missed anything important.

New Trailer and Release Date

We got a new trailer for the 456 collection, which covers (most of) what I'm going to say in this post, and a release date of January 25, 2024!

New Features

Language Support: These games are now available in seven languages: Japanese, English, French, German, Korean, and Traditional and Simplified Chinese, along with voice dubs for each of these. These are some of the first times some of the games (in particular 5 and 6) are officially translated to many of these languages.

DLC: The previously DLC-exclusive cases Turnabout Reclaimed and Turnabout Time Traveler will be added to the game for free, along with previously DLC-exclusive costumes. You can dress up Phoenix in the Tigre outfit from the beginning!

QOL: As well, any of the quality of life features from the Great Ace Attorney Chronicles have been added to the 456 collection. This includes an episode/chapter select unlocked from the start, so you can skip straight to your favorite sections, autoplay and story mode, and a backlog/history to review recent text.

Art Gallery: The game will also include an "art gallery" which includes concept art for the games. This will also include special artworks commissioned exclusively for this collection, some of which are unlocked after beating each game and unlocking each trilogy.

Orchestra Hall: There is also an "orchestra hall" where you can listen to what seems to be the full soundtrack for all three games (though I haven't verified this), along with orchestral tracks from the 15th anniversary and 2019 orchestra concerts.

There are also two new "trilogy exclusive" songs: "Apollo Justice - A New Era Begins! 2024", and "Trucy's Theme - Bring It In, Everyone". The new "a new era begins" remix might possibly be what they're playing in the trailer. "Bring It In, Everyone" is distinct from Trucy's main theme, "Child of Magic" (listed earlier in the soundtrack list), so I have no idea what that one will be like.

Animation Studio: This new feature allows you to play around with character models, setting up different backgrounds and sprites and settings, to create whatever scene you want. This doesn't seem to have a text feature, so it just seems kind of like a worse objection.lol but with 3D sprites. (Although I'm sure the objection.lol people will find a way to rip the models in like... five minutes of the game's release)

Preorder Information

It seems we overseas people will only have the collection available digitally, but Japan seems to have physical copies along with a lot of preorder bonuses! You can find the official page here.

This includes the following:

Game Software: You can order this standalone, or with the other preorder goods, or seemingly just the goods on their own without the software included.

Original Drama CDs: Two new drama CDs are being developed for this collection! As far as I can tell, one involves the Gavinners attempting a one-night-only revival of the band (which goes poorly...), and the second involves Taka fleeing the courtroom.

Evidence and Items Set: This includes ten pieces of evidence available from the games, along with some original illustrations. As can be seen above, this includes things like the photo of Apollo and Clay from Dual Destinies, six ID photos of major characters, and a signed poster of Klavier.

As well, a new sleeve box drawn by Takuro Fuse, the character designer for 5 and 6.

That should cover everything, but please let me know if I missed any news!

[sprucewoodmpreg]

hi vaguely serious messy post about hermitblr and new members and just. letting everyone know that we’ve had history with cc interaction on here before that i think would be useful for people to learn about

Trafficblr/Hermitblr has seen a lot of growth lately, largely in part from people migrating over here from the DSMP side of MCYTblr. This in of itself is completely fine! New people jumping onto the bus with us are always welcome, and the growth of the community as a whole is really nice to see.

However, I have noticed a lot of these newer blogs sharing the same very specific behaviours, and if possible, I’d like to just make a few things about the community and our history clear. Because this isn’t DSMP, and the CCs here handle content creation and their own fanbases very differently to them.

While I’m not going to go in-depth on 2019 since I don’t have nearly as much information about it as other people do, I would like to say that back then, Hermitblr was kind of an active war zone. It was comparable to how Hermittwt is now, with infighting about shipping and similar topics being the norm (however in Hermitblr’s case many of these argument were far more personal due to the smaller fandom size). What I want to point out specifically however, is when one of the CCs, Cleo, was thrown into the community infighting. I don’t remember the specifics of it, but she was sent an ask asking about shipping, and her opinions on it, and eventually dealt with so much backlash that she was forced to leave the site entirely (this post here has a slightly more comprehensive summary, if need be).

I’m just a little concerned, because there seems to have been a slight increase in that demographic of people recently. Specifically, members of the community who want to rely on CCs to dictate what happens in fan spaces; for them to give us bullet point lists of what their exact boundaries are for every single situation.

This rarely ends well. As in, it almost always just causes infighting and hostility. There will always be people making content that will “break boundaries”, regardless of any creator’s wishes. However, this is usually mitigated by the fact that many of these CCs aren’t on Tumblr (at least not anymore....mostly). The problem arises when members of the community attempt to act as Heroes Of Justice, and go out of their way to send asks to other blogs, informing them exactly of how they’ve broken the boundaries of some 40 year old adult. This is all despite the fact that said adult will....never see whatever post went against their wishes. It just encourages policing and this weird superiority....thing, where despite the lack of content creators, people are still fighting to make sure that the site is clean from any possibly upsetting posts.

I say this all while also acknowledging that many of the creators in this sphere also don’t have a very comprehensive understanding of how fandom interacts with their “characters”. To them, “shipping” has always been RPF, and there are so many other aspects of the community that simply can’t be explained easily, as they haven’t been immersed in this culture like we have. This is to say that asking for “boundaries” is likely to get you a very confused and unhelpful answer, as the Hermits have always had a very different way of interacting and viewing their fanbase than the DSMP creators do. There is no “c!” or “cc!” to them, to put it simply.

Essentially, the Hermits are adults. They’ve been doing content creation for years, and I can guarantee you they’ve seen worse things in their lives than art of their Minecraft character kissing another Minecraft character. They’ve dealt with this shit before, and if they wanted it to stop, they’re free to make a post about it whenever want. And yet, they haven’t. They leave fandom up to us. Boundaries and rules and infighting and just...all of that? Let’s leave it to the Twitter users, please. Post what you want, make sure to tag your posts correctly, and we’ll all be fine. 

Also, while I’m going to try not to rehash any discourse about inviting CCs to Tumblr, I also do just want to implore you guys to consider that the environment on Hermittwt is partially the way it is because of the active presence of the Hermits there, with people flocking for attention or a single notice, and obsessively checking posts to make sure they’re not potentially “boundary-breaking” and such. Please just consider that many people are here to avoid the dynamics of that site. Tumblr is a site for fans, not for the CCs. So we create content here for ourselves, and not for them. Having creators join almost always leads to the culture of their fanbase on here changing, with content posted in the maintags being catered more towards them rather than the fanbase. (This isn’t to say that they can’t join!! But at least keeping in mind why many of us are here in the first place and weighing that against potential CC interactions would mean a lot).

I fear that my point may have been lost a little bit, but I hope my explanation at least brings a little bit of light to why many members of the community here are wary of Creators coming over to the site, and also of how many newer blogs tend to treat the CCs. Hermitblr has had some really bad history in the past when it comes to this stuff, and seeing newer fans bring over similar ideas from DSMPblr just worries me a little bit.

TL:DR - Just...please treat the Hermits like the adults they are, and keep in mind they have a very different dynamic with their fanbases to the DSMP creators. Asking for “boundaries” and granting CCs control of the fanbase will likely lead you nowhere; attempting to police fanspaces here just brings up bad memories of times when Hermitblr was a much more miserable place to be in. Plus, if you want CC interactions, please just go to twitter. Nobody here wants to deal with an attempted “cleanse” of the site to make it more palatable to CCs.

[gatheringbones]

[“In a 2019 tweet (since deleted), Twitter user Brooke wrote of ‘carving “trans” into every bone of my body so when they find my skeleton in two hundred years they don’t get too confused’. A reply parodied the response of an oblivious archaeologist: ‘We must be careful not to jump to conclusions about what these ancient carvings could have meant; This individual could have had a passion for mass transit, transcontinental travel, or a combination of poor spelling and a love of trance music’.

Every time I read jokes like this, I get a jolt of hurt and defensiveness: not all historians and academics are like that! I try so hard, every day, not to do the kind of history they’re talking about! And yet I can hardly blame these people for talking and writing the way they do. The fact is that the discipline of history is set up to erase queer lives, and particularly trans lives. We are expected to adhere to double standards of evidence, which encourage us to state with impunity that a historical figure was definitely cis, but to hedge with caveats the suggestion that they were maybe, possibly trans; to use phrases like ‘cross-dresser’ or ‘impersonator’ as if they’re neutral, and to write lengthy defences of ourselves if we decide to avoid them; to expect backlash from colleagues and reviewers if we choose to use any pronouns for a historical figure other than those associated with the gender they were assigned at birth; to say, like the caricatured archaeologist above, ‘We must be careful not to jump to conclusions’, even when the evidence for trans experience is actually abundantly conclusive. It hurts when people memeify the oblivious, transphobic ‘historian’, but it’s also not unfair of them to do it. History, while it may not perpetuate physical harm, still repeatedly enacts violence against trans lives in the past and the present. And it’s not the job of the communities we’ve hurt to give us the benefit of the doubt: it’s our job to convince them that historians can be different.

In this book, I’ve identified new ways, and new places, to look for trans history. I’ve argued for the presence of trans experience in histories of gender-nonconforming fashion; histories of gender-nonconforming performance; and histories of people taking on a social role that isn’t associated with the gender they were assigned at birth. I’ve shown that many trans histories are inextricable from histories of other experiences: the sexual, the intersex, the anti-patriarchal, the spiritual. I’ve argued both for acknowledging trans possibility in histories of widespread gender nonconformity that have previously been explained in other ways, and for understanding gendered histories on their own terms – including seeing them, where necessary, as both trans history and the history of other kinds of people and experiences.

In this last kind of history in particular, I’ve often been confronted by what writer and philosopher Hil Malatino (quoting fellow scholar Abram J. Lewis) calls the ‘irreducible alterity’ of people in the past: the fact that some histories of gender are not possible to map onto or relate to the way people experience gender today. Malatino characterises the acknowledgement of this ‘irreducible alterity’ as a form of care for those past people, an idea that speaks deeply to me. It struck me, when I first read it, how different this framing of ‘care’ was from the arguments historians more commonly make against describing people in the past as trans: that it is presentist, that it is anachronistic, that it inappropriately fixes past people in modern categories. These arguments have rarely seemed to me to come from a place of care for people in the past; instead their priority seems to be history or historiographical methodology as an abstract, faux-objective entity. Still more rarely do they seem to acknowledge the concurrent urgency of caring for people in the present: the people who are living now, experiencing and articulating their gender in manifold ways and drawing strength from the histories of people who have done the same. Might it not be possible to find ways of recognising the essential difference of people in the past – people who disrupted gender before we were trans – while simultaneously holding space for the feelings of identification with them held by people in the present, the people who are trans now?”]

kit heyam, from before we were trans: a new history of gender, 2022

[turtleblogatlast]

Thinking about the Don Suave scene and what it means in terms of LGBTQ+ representation because my brain does nothing if not torment me with random topics to ramble about on the regular.

Anyway, I just wanted to ramble about why I like the scene but to get it out of the way - the scene can very easily be interpreted in so many different ways, and all of them are valid. I personally see it as Leo having at least some attraction to a man. And the following is an explanation of my own interpretation and thoughts on it and what it means especially for Leo’s portrayal in the grand scheme of things.

Long-winded interpretation under the cut!

Now, to start with, it’s important to me that in the scene Leo looks at Don Suave in the very beginning and then for the entirety of the rest of the time the man is on screen, Leo’s eyes are closed. Yet, in the end, he is still visibly enamored with Don Suave, happily cuddling up to him as he’s being carried away.

You can very easily interpret this as Leo being spellbound and that’s honestly super valid and I believe he likely was at least somewhat in the beginning, but considering how fast he looked away and how he never looked again, I personally think it makes more sense to read it as Leo just finding the man attractive, at least somewhat. (For the record, I personally headcanon Rise Leo as bisexual with a heavy preference for men, but I want to be blunt when I say that any interpretation is valid. Literally any. Ace, pan, gay, bi, none of the above or a mixture of something new literally all of it is more than okay and fair. Hell you could even interpret this entire scene as more romantic attraction than physical and it would still work. Anything goes!! Don’t bother people, guys, really.)

The main reason I take this scene to be at the very least LGBTQ+ adjacent isn’t just because of how it’s portrayed, but because of who Leonardo is. Not in terms of Rise of the TMNT, but in terms of the entire Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles™️ franchise.

Leo’s a character who, while changing with each iteration, has still at his core been around for decades upon decades as “the blue one”. One fourth of the team. He’s the one most are going to look at as the Leader, and oftentimes he is the one closest to having the title of Main Character. Not to say the others aren’t just as important, but Leo’s presence in the A plots of basically all TMNT media is often something very main character-esque.

And that’s very, very important to note. Here we have a Main Character of a prolific and decades long-running franchise distributed by a children’s television network. You can play around with his and his brothers’ characters all you like, but there is always going to be challenges to dodge around, especially since this was still in 2018-2019.

For example, you can play around with their designs so long as they’re color coded turtles, but their sexualities? Now that’s tricky.

“But what about Hypno and Warren?” Not main characters and also they’re Rise originals. They have a lot more room to play around with than a character like Leo does. But even talking about main characters in the franchise, you could arguably have an easier time playing around with Donnie or Mikey’s sexualities than Leo or even Raph, as (unfortunately) the former two tend to get more B plots, so they’d likely have had a little more leeway (still not a lot though.)

So, where does this leave us?

It leaves us in a place where outright stating and/or showing undeniable proof of Leo’s attraction to men is very, very difficult. So, workarounds!

Workarounds like the entire Don Suave situation.

To be honest, as left up to interpretation and lowkey and deniable as it is, this whole scene means a lot to me because of who Leo is as a character. It’s just nice when we get so see even the bare bones of representation with characters that have been such a large part of pop culture for decades, y’know? Even if more would be so much nicer, this is better than I thought we’d ever get for these boys.

And, again, literally nothing I’ve said is the only way to interpret it, I’m more than happy when people interpret media on their own honestly, it’s just something I’ve been thinking of lately and I was wondering if others felt the same way.

Whatever you think when you interpret this scene or Rise Leo as a whole, I just thought this would be interesting to think about, even if it was ramble-y, haha.